Maybe I’m Crazy - Episode 207

Summary

Crash Dummies Podcast with Pat and Mike – Episode 207: "Maybe I’m Crazy"

Release Date: May 21, 2025

In Episode 207 of the Crash Dummies Podcast, hosts Patrick Johnson and Michael Esiobu tackle a variety of current events, social issues, and personal anecdotes with their characteristic humor and candid dialogue. This detailed summary captures the essence of their discussions, notable insights, and memorable quotes to provide an engaging overview for those who haven’t tuned in.

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1. The Toxic Environment in the WNBA Season

[02:13 – 05:19]

Pat and Mike kick off the episode by addressing the perceived toxicity surrounding the current WNBA season. They express concerns over recurring negative narratives and the broader issue of sexism towards female athletes.

• Pat: "[02:21] 'WNBA season is so toxic.'"
• Mike: "[02:22] 'It's so toxic.'"
• Pat: "[02:37] 'I forgot how toxic it ended. And now that it's starting to pick back up, I'm starting to see like the same narratives be pushed...'"

They delve into the rivalry between Angel Reese and Kayla Clark, questioning whether such competitive tensions are genuinely healthy or exacerbated by external societal pressures. The conversation highlights the disproportionate scrutiny female athletes face compared to their male counterparts.

• Pat: "[03:07] 'Yeah, there’s no such thing as a healthy rivalry. Some people are always going to take shit to the extreme.'"
• Mike: "[03:45] 'It's interesting... these rivalries shouldn't automatically imply genuine hate.'"

2. Social Media's Impact on Athlete Reputations

[05:19 – 08:26]

The hosts shift focus to discuss RG3’s controversial online behavior, particularly his offensive jokes about melanin and melatonin.

• Pat: "[07:22] 'He made a joke about his wife accidentally eating melanin instead of melatonin to fall asleep.'"
• Mike: "[07:43] 'He’s probably calculated the backlash and is using these antics to stay relevant despite negative perceptions.'"

They debate whether RG3 anticipated the racial undertones and the subsequent backlash from his remarks, emphasizing the delicate balance athletes must maintain on social media.

3. Political Endorsements and Public Trust

[09:59 – 10:07]

Pat and Mike briefly touch upon former President Obama’s role in political endorsements, particularly his public support during Trump’s election.

• Pat: "[10:07] 'At the end of the day, men in this country voted strictly because there was a woman running.'"

They discuss the influence of reputable figures in shaping public opinion and trust within the political landscape.

4. Niche Sports vs. Mainstream Athletic Success

[10:15 – 12:36]

Engaging in a playful debate, Mike asks Pat whether he would prefer to be the greatest of all time (GOAT) in a niche sport or an average player in the NBA.

• Mike: "[10:18] 'Would you rather be the goat in a niche sport or average in the NBA?'"
• Pat: "[10:32] 'I'm gonna say average in the NBA.'"

Pat argues that fame and financial success in the NBA offer greater long-term benefits compared to excelling in less popular sports.

• Pat: "[11:10] 'It's about the longevity of mixture in... fame and money are a nice mixture you can take further.'"

5. Listener Stories and Personal Anecdotes

[30:37 – 37:05]

The episode features a fictional caller, portrayed by Ryan Reynolds, who shares a dramatic story about fraud involving his cousin. This segment blends humor with exaggerated storytelling, highlighting the hosts' ability to engage with entertaining narratives.

• Ryan Reynolds: "[30:37] 'This was serious at the time.'"
• Pat: "[34:36] 'He was already at the station snitching on you...'"

The interplay between Ryan’s exaggerated tale and the hosts’ reactions provides comedic relief while emphasizing themes of trust and betrayal.

6. Relationship Dynamics and Conflict Resolution

[26:16 – 29:09]

Pat and Mike explore the complexities of trust between parents and children, especially when promises are broken.

• Mike: "[26:20] 'Do you think kids lose trust in their parents sometimes?...'"
• Pat: "[26:45] 'I don't lie to my son.'"

They discuss the importance of honesty and accountability in maintaining healthy relationships, both familial and romantic.

7. Fun with Words: Spelling Challenges

[38:00 – 40:35]

In a lighthearted segment, Pat challenges Ryan Reynolds with spelling difficult words like "dysfunctional" and "minuscule," leading to humorous exchanges about language proficiency.

• Pat: "[38:27] 'Spell dysfunctional.'"
• Ryan Reynolds: "[38:31] 'D, Y is L T I, O...'"

This playful competition showcases the hosts' camaraderie and adds a fun twist to the episode.

8. Audience Interaction and Social Media Commentary

[Various Timestamps]

Throughout the episode, Pat and Mike engage with listener interactions, including "Tweet of the Week" segments where they analyze and react to social media posts.

• Pat: "[83:25] 'Seeing a girl cry over you doesn't hurt you.'"
• Mike: "[88:11] 'Hey, let me put this in my notes...'"

These segments provide relatable content and foster a sense of community among listeners.

9. Closing Remarks and Future Plans

[105:16 – 106:01]

As the episode concludes, Pat and Mike discuss upcoming plans, including live shows in Atlanta and collaborations with other content creators. They encourage listeners to suggest potential guests and continue supporting the podcast through subscriptions.

• Pat: "[105:21] 'We'll be in Atlanta on the 28th. Let us know who y'all think we should work with when we out there.'"
• Mike: "[106:01] 'Appreciate y'all subscribe to the Patreon...'"

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Pat: "[02:21] 'WNBA season is so toxic.'"
• Pat: "[03:07] 'Yeah, there’s no such thing as a healthy rivalry. Some people are always going to take shit to the extreme.'"
• Pat: "[07:22] 'He made a joke about his wife accidentally eating melanin instead of melatonin to fall asleep.'"
• Pat: "[10:07] 'At the end of the day, men in this country voted strictly because there was a woman running.'"
• Pat: "[26:45] 'I don't lie to my son.'"
• Pat: "[38:27] 'Spell dysfunctional.'"
• Pat: "[83:25] 'Seeing a girl cry over you doesn't hurt you.'"

---

Conclusion

Episode 207 of the Crash Dummies Podcast masterfully combines discussions on sports culture, social media influence, relationship dynamics, and listener interactions. Pat and Mike offer insightful perspectives peppered with humor, making complex topics accessible and engaging. Whether dissecting the challenges faced by female athletes or navigating the intricacies of personal relationships, this episode provides a comprehensive and entertaining listen.

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For those interested in building healthy financial habits with family, Pat and Mike also recommend checking out resources like Greenlight and Mint Mobile, seamlessly integrating valuable advice into their entertaining discourse.

Transcript

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[Mike]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

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[Ryan Reynolds]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

Oh wow.

[Mike]

Should we open? Should we open up again?

[Pat]

Pause.

[Mike]

Welcome to Crash W podcast episode 208. I'm Mike, that's Pat. What you guys just ignore what you heard?

[Pat]

No, that was crazy bro.

[Mike]

But you know what I meant.

[Pat]

I don't know what you meant.

[Mike]

Like open up the podcast.

[Pat]

Yeah, I know. I know what you Now I know what you mean.

[Mike]

There's no way you're questioning that.

[Pat]

Hey man, you never know when your man just gonna go off the rail and start opening up.

[Mike]

Make sure you guys subscribe to the Patreon. What else we got?

[Pat]

Any. Anywho, what's in the news right now? Oh we man WNBA season is so toxic.

[Mike]

It's so toxic.

[Pat]

I forgot how toxic it ended. And now that it's starting to pick back up, I'm starting to see like the same narratives be pushed and it's the same thing. This player looked like this. This player looked like that. And I forget how much women are hated.

[Mike]

That's crazy sometimes.

[Pat]

Like when. When women aren't the the main topic. Like if it's the NBA playoffs or NHL playoffs, you don't really realize it. But then when women start to build back up, which the WNBC NBA season is wrapping up right now, you start to see it. And he like, damn, y' all really hate women, bro.

[Mike]

Like, it's interesting. Obviously, we're talking about the Angel Reese and Kayla Clark thing. It's interesting that. Cause I do think they have a rivalry and it's like a healthy. It's healthy to have rivalries in sports, right?

[Pat]

Yes, yes, very healthy. And this is, to be honest, there's no such thing as a healthy rivalry. Some people are always going to take shit to the extreme.

[Mike]

Exactly.

[Pat]

I got a cousin that will kill you if you skunk him in basketball. Like, you gotta. Don't skunk him, though. If it's 6 0, let him score.

[Mike]

I just think when it comes to women in sports, they take those rivalries, like, so seriously because they think, like, it has to be genuine hate because there's so many random NBA rivalries. Right. We don't really, like. We don't really talk about it the same way. Like, they shouldn't be doing this. Or this person definitely hates this person or that person definitely hates this person without it being, like, weird.

[Pat]

Yeah. I don't. It's just weird because one small little hate opens it up for someone else to hate in, like, a different type of way. Where he starts to get racial.

[Mike]

Yes. That's. That's the up part. It gets so racial when it's like, it shouldn't have to go there. But that one person saying the thing. Because, you know, even though they're saying something that might be true, that add that little extra, that little extra fire that knows that everybody else is going to say that about it.

[Pat]

Right. Because they're not. They're not as protected. Like, if I say I don't like, let's say I'm rooting against Julius Randle.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And I'm like, man, Julius Randle ain't nothing compared to, you know, Shay Gildrich Alexander. You know what I mean? Like, if I said something like that, I don't have to worry about Julius Randle being bashed or being a black man.

[Mike]

Yeah, exactly.

[Pat]

But, like, my job as a black man is to know that no matter what Angel Reese does, if I, like, bet on her and she messes up my parlay or I don't like the way she play, or I'm rooting against the team that's playing against her, my job as a black man is to never say Something. Something online, publicly about Angel Reese, knowing that when I do, there's gonna be somebody that hate her for a. Totally different than what I'm talking.

[Mike]

You could have all the good, like, the good intentions of saying or just being like actual critique of basketball. Just giving your opinion about it. Right. But again, I. You were talking about, like, the RG3 thing. We know when he made that tweet. He's smart enough to know that that's gonna get negative comments about Angel Reese in a way that I don't think she deserves.

[Pat]

You know, he's also what I want, people. RG3 doesn't work for any network right now. Yeah, he's independent. So, like, he's getting independent contracts. This is like he's making money off this. Like, I don't think he's had this much interaction since. I don't know.

[Mike]

When I looked at the Tweet. Had like 14 million views. His original tweet.

[Pat]

That's what I'm saying.

[Mike]

I was like, what the.

[Pat]

At first. And it's crazy because like you said, you say you thought Ryan Clark was tripping. At first. At first, when I first heard it, I was just like, I don't know why he brought his family into it.

[Mike]

Yes. I. I didn't. I didn't understand the concept of his. Of his. Him bringing his wife into it. At first.

[Pat]

Yeah, but.

[Mike]

But then.

[Pat]

Yeah, but then when you use your. Your. Your milk. Your. What you call your wife your milk as like an offensive move. So you use it as, like, offensively on the offense. So it's just like. Then I can use it as a defense. Like, you know what I mean? So it's just like. You put it out there. I'm just saying. What you put out there.

[Mike]

Yeah. Because there was that one crazy video of him holding this kid, and it was like, you wanted some chocolate milk. It's just.

[Pat]

That's not the craziest video.

[Mike]

There was another one.

[Pat]

There's one where he was, like, laying in bed or she went to bed, or he went. Yes.

[Mike]

And she changed color.

[Pat]

And she changed colors.

[Mike]

I think she ate a chocolate. And then she.

[Pat]

I don't think it was.

[Mike]

I swear to God. I swear. Watch the video.

[Pat]

It was just something like.

[Mike]

Just watch the video.

[Pat]

I'm not saying I believe.

[Mike]

You don't think it was a chocolate.

[Pat]

I don't think it was a chocolate.

[Mike]

I swear. She ate something. What'd she eat?

[Pat]

Oh, no. We gotta find that video before you go. I can't even move forward. So we're Back. Mike was wrong. But you're on the right track, though, because I didn't even know that she ate something. So you knew she ate something, but it wasn't a piece of chocolate. Basically, he made a joke about his wife accidentally eating melanin instead of melatonin to, like, fall asleep. So when she ate the melanin and fell asleep, when she pulled open the covers, it was him. Like, she had turned black.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Because of the melanin she took. So it's just like when you make stupid ass jokes like that and it's just like, what. Like, what do you expect in return? But I think our. There's no way. Even though, like, just because someone does something and it's perceived a different way, like, do I believe that RG3 would be doing a little shucking and driving? Yeah.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I mean? But that doesn't mean they're not smart.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And I do think RG3 could. He had to have calculated somebody coming back at him.

[Mike]

Yeah. I think he knew he was going to get back, I think. But I think with all his tweets, I mean, those have been. Tweets have been going on and those corny videos been going on for a long time.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

So he already knows when. When that happens. And I think the Angel Reese and Caitlin Carr thing was a hot topic. And I think it was more because, you know, when they do interviews and like, I don't hate this person because hey is a strong word. And I don't like that he used the word hate because I don't think he. I don't think she hates. If I hate somebody, I don't want them to succeed in anything. I think they both generally want each other and they're just competitive.

[Pat]

Bro. Bro. Caitlin Clark and Angel Reese were both built by the CIA.

[Mike]

I just want you to know Angel.

[Pat]

Reese went to Maryland.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Mm.

[Pat]

Lsu, then the Chicago Sky.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Angel. I mean, Caitlin Clark went to Iowa, then Indiana.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

One like, come on now. Like, they just. It's just been a setup for the longest. We let angel win the first championship. Kailyn, like, pushing on the ground like. No, but for real, it's. It's. I think it's good for the wnb. A lot of people don't realize they need the rivalry. A lot of people don't realize, like, this remind me of Magic and Bird a little bit. It's kind of like that. It's kind of like that divide like one flashy guy in la, the other, you know, hard work, blue collar, one like, so everybody in America can relate to somebody and it brings fans there.

[Mike]

I think this. I don't know. I don't really care if anybody in our audience causes whatever. What's the word? Simps for this. But I think a lot of dudes are. Especially dudes in media is there are afraid of women with confidence and afraid of what they look at it weird because I think they're not used to seeing it all the time. So it's always a comment when somebody's like, over. Because Angel Reese does get a lot of shit. And I think, because obviously she has a podcast, so she's doing a lot more talking than. Than Caitlin Clark. So it's like one of those things where it's like her opinions out there and she's more out there more than Caitlin Clark, to be honest, in media wise. So I think sometimes there's a lot more to judge on her in that sense.

[Pat]

Bro. At the end of the day, you got men in this country that voted strictly because there was a woman running.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And they didn't want to vote a woman. Even though they were Latino. They didn't give a. Like that.

[Mike]

I got a sports question for you, though.

[Pat]

Okay. Go sport. I feel like it's too many. Let's separate it.

[Mike]

No, no, it's kind of, like, different. So would you rather.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

And I actually wanted to hear your opinion about it. Would you rather be the goat in a knit sport or average in the NBA?

[Pat]

I'm gonna say average in the NBA.

[Mike]

Really?

[Pat]

Yeah. So you tell me the best pickleball player of all time.

[Mike]

I don't know, but I know he makes a lot of money.

[Pat]

Correct, correct. I get that. I get that. You tell me the best badminton player of all time.

[Mike]

I don't know.

[Pat]

Okay, okay, okay. You tell me. Do you know who Jared Bayless is?

[Mike]

Jared Bayless?

[Pat]

Yeah. You know who Ramon Sessions is?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

There you go.

[Mike]

So you care about being known, though? Yeah. That's where the money's at.

[Pat]

It's about the longevity of mixture in. Cause I feel like not everybody, but I feel like the mixture of fame and money is like a nice mixture and that you can take. It's like more of a. A compacted business thing that you can take further. You know what I'm saying?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like the mixture of, okay, I got some money and I got some notoriety, so I can mix that together and spread that like, longer long term. Like the dude who. The goat of Batman, he can't. He ain't got a Nike commercial.

[Mike]

Where's Commercial if I'm just saying you.

[Pat]

Might not want to be seen. I get that. People tell your kids.

[Mike]

You can tell everybody that I was the best at this sport in the world.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

There are 8 billion people and I'm the best at this.

[Pat]

All your song gonna do is yeah, yeah, dad put the fruit snacks in the one spot. I didn't care about no goddamn badminton. Ronnie James play tonight, man. Come on, man.

[Mike]

I guess it does depend what niche sport you. You pick.

[Pat]

Yeah. I mean, even like the little. I mean, sometimes I think of like the Olympic sports because those are like, very specific.

[Mike]

Do you say niche or niche?

[Pat]

I say niche. I've been like, cringing with the niche.

[Mike]

A niche.

[Pat]

Yeah. I don't know what it is.

[Mike]

I think it's both. I think you can say both.

[Pat]

Yeah. But I think a lot of people say niche.

[Mike]

I say niche sometimes, but niche sounds better.

[Pat]

I just try to avoid words where it's like. That's why I don't say tomato. I don't say. Just stay away from. I don't want to debate, bro. That's tomato to me, bro. No, somebody pissed right now. He just doing this to with me. Somebody on the Internet asked a question and said, what's your biggest l. This response said, passed me in front of my crush and I tore my ACL chasing him. No way I would crash out.

[Mike]

No give my game pants, bro. Especially as a. As an adult. I would have crashed out, bro.

[Pat]

I'm literally training to beat your ass like the same time. I'm like, training my acl. Yeah, I'm trained because that's what. Exactly. My first day healthy. I'm beating your ass. Okay. And damn, I hate when I might this up. In Calabari tradition, the bride will not laugh or smile until she is satisfied with the amount of money showered on her during traditional marriage. Wouldn't be funny to me. And I would beat anybody ass that made me laugh. I'm crashing the out. If only I like. Let's say like, you made me laugh at 10,000. That 10,000 is now on your head. Good luck. I'm literally giving it right to the hitman. Him right there.

[Mike]

How are you even counting that money? Because they're like, that's. The Calabari is a. It's in Nigeria. So people are just spraying money like that. And it'll be fun to see you have a traditional wedding. A traditional Nigerian wedding.

[Pat]

Why? Why?

[Mike]

Because when you're. Because when you're dancing with the. Your bride.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

People come. Everybody just come around and Start spraying money on you.

[Pat]

Oh, dudes too?

[Mike]

Yeah, dudes too. They're like, stick money on your head or some like that too.

[Pat]

We're not doing that, man. Shout out to my dear Nigerians. But I won't be having no wedding like that. I'll tell you that. He's taking on my face. Okay, that's probably the funniest. Okay, this is from the 1 verse 101 gorilla verse 100.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Pat]

Okay. Imagine eating Wingstop and a gorilla just comes up to you and fucks you raw.

[Mike]

What was the why we stop? Like, let's start there, bro.

[Pat]

I don't know why this tw is. Imagine eating wing stop. And a gorilla just comes up to you and you raw. That's the tweet.

[Mike]

No, imaginations are. Are cooked. Oh, my God. That's legit. Saying the. That's. You know when you say people say the first thing on their mind.

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mike]

But that even being a first thought is crazy.

[Pat]

The thing about it I would ask him is, like, usually when you imagine big idea things.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You have to imagine yourself as a main character. You know what I mean? You just don't be like, oh, I just imagined my friend getting by. A girl. You were those you in the scenario?

[Mike]

Well, one time I went to a friend's house, like, back in the day, and they had a roach at their house. And when I talked about the roach, they acted like I was the problem. They got mad at me for pointing out that, oh, it was that a roach. And I. And I'm very confused on why. What that even is. Because it's like, bro, it's a roach in your crib. Yeah.

[Pat]

I think that's like. Was that the only one that you saw?

[Mike]

No, I've seen it. That was the first time he's seeing.

[Pat]

It in their place.

[Mike]

In their place. Yes.

[Pat]

Yeah. I think it's just like, when people. My assumption is, like, when they got roaches, they just want it. Like, it's like unspoken. Like, come on. Like, they're probably like, what we gonna do about this?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I'm saying? Like, you eating or not, bro?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

He barely crawled on your bro. Like, he barely touched the spaghetti. Bro. Bro. It's just the outside of bread. Peel the part he just touching, bro.

[Mike]

Now there's some friends cribs. I've been to them. Like, damn.

[Pat]

Now I've been to a friend crib where one the roaches was renting out another room. This room just theirs. They pay rent. Damn.

[Mike]

I think we talked about this before, like, there's always those friends where, you know, not to eat at the house. Yeah, yeah. Because barring like, I've had, like, you know, I've had a whole bunch of friends where the house is super clean. But I saw the way that they wash their plates in front of me.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And it made me not want to eat there anymore. When I was like, the cups just like quick. They just quick rinse their cups. Quick wins. No soap was used. I'm like, all right, I eat here no more.

[Pat]

I was, I was at a house so nasty that to use a dish, you had to wash a dish. So you don't know how long that dish been sitting there. You know what I mean? And then it's like, so everybody grabbing, oh, let's eat. So everybody started grabbing their dishes, washing it, said, what the. Somebody eating over here a vegan today?

[Mike]

Yeah, they have to wash a utensil.

[Pat]

Really? I ain't got in here. I can eat. I'm. Yeah, I'm on a diet, bro.

[Mike]

No, that would make. That would make me kind of feel weird when they open their drawer and be like, oh, we don't. I don't got no clean spoons. Hold on. For me, it's really with. With cups. Yeah, it's. It's cups for me because I don't know, it's just different cups and, and spoons.

[Pat]

I see, I see a lot of stuff. Like, I see a lot of people do like, certain things wrong. I've seen somebody keep ranch in the cabinet.

[Mike]

Yeah, I don't do that.

[Pat]

And you like, bro, Refrigerate after Open my dog. You don't read no instructions.

[Mike]

So are you a syrup in the cabinet person or syrup in the fridge person?

[Pat]

If whatever the directions say, the direction says refrigerate after opening, then I'm going to listen to the person that created the product.

[Mike]

But. Okay, I guess I think I have. I have two types of syrups. I think I keep my, my sugar free syrup in the fridge and I keep my, my regular syrup in the cabinet.

[Pat]

I feel like. I feel like that's just a. Like, it's like honey, right?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

They can live without it. I don't know. I just listen to the directions. I don't know what to tell you on that.

[Mike]

What about bread?

[Pat]

What do you mean?

[Mike]

Where do you keep your bread?

[Pat]

I don't really buy bread anymore.

[Mike]

I don't either.

[Pat]

I'll freeze it.

[Mike]

Okay. Yeah. Okay. I'm trying to think about other, other perishable items like pears. Pears I depend.

[Pat]

It's a bunch of everybody gonna do different. I'm not trying to have no debate about where a put us at. And you don't put your bananas on top of the fridge. What are you doing?

[Mike]

Oh, no. I hate those arguments. Yeah. All right, I got a question for you. What if humans laid eggs instead of giving birth? How do you think that would change society?

[Pat]

I guess when you lay eggs. When you lay eggs, the. The baby isn't here right away.

[Mike]

Exactly.

[Pat]

The baby still has some time to cook, so obviously. I don't know, it just feel weird because now we got to venture into women's bodies. It's none of our business. Is everybody getting eggs now? Yeah.

[Mike]

Yeah. All right, let's say what? Dudes could lay eggs too?

[Pat]

Dudes could lay eggs. You know, dudes don't take care of.

[Mike]

Eggs. Be expired, bro. Let me cook.

[Pat]

Be a lot of weird looking ass babies around here. Just dropped my egg and when I was lifting the other day, little gonna be all right, though. Nah.

[Mike]

Putting duct tape on your unborn kid. Yeah.

[Pat]

God damn. Too much sunlight in this God damn kid.

[Mike]

Come out with cte.

[Pat]

I'm saving this shot right here. So if you see this shot, I'm saving this shot for our first, like, really, like, the listener color is so ass that it makes me take a shot. So I'm saving that and that's what I'm gonna do. And if somebody is more ass than the last person, then I'll go refill the shot. But this is just like, for. Oh, I can't even take this caller. And you're gonna see me take the shot even if you don't see the car. It just happened.

[Mike]

So Haley Bieber was on the COVID of Vogue. Right?

[Pat]

Right, right.

[Mike]

And Justin Bieber wrote her a congratulations post. And it reads, yo, this reminds me when. Yo, this reminds me when Haley and I got into a huge fight, I told Hales that she would never be on the COVID of Vogue. Yikes. I know. So mean. For some reason, because I felt so disrespected, I thought I got. I thought I gotta get even. I think we mature. I think as we mature, we realize that we're not helping anything by getting even. We're honestly just prolonging what we really want, which is intimacy and connection. So, baby, you already know, but forgive me for saying you wouldn't get on the Coke the Vogue cover, because clearly I was sadly mistaken. And that is a weird. Congratulations.

[Pat]

That's fire.

[Mike]

Hell no. I'm sadly mistaken.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

That means he's sad about the mistake.

[Pat]

If it's only weird if they never had this conversation before for.

[Mike]

I think even if they had the conversation is a little off.

[Pat]

No, that's what I'm saying. If they did have the conversation is weird. That's what I meant.

[Mike]

Oh, if they did have the conversation. It's weird.

[Pat]

It's weird because.

[Mike]

No, I think it's more weird if you didn't have the conversation.

[Pat]

What if that's just like, he never was able ever to. It's Justin Bieber. N. What the.

[Mike]

No, there are some different bro.

[Pat]

He do what he want. Like, people got different rules. Can Michael Eovo get away with that?

[Mike]

No.

[Pat]

Justin Bieber. Yeah, he get away with that. He sung Love yourself, man.

[Mike]

Yeah, true. I think once you make baby, you can do anything you want, man. But it was. I think it is a. It might be a strange thing to bring a private argument onto the Internet in general.

[Pat]

Yeah. It might have been a long time ago, and it might have been. It might be funny to them now, like.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I mean? It's just like, I never said you was gonna be on the COVID of Vogue.

[Mike]

Yeah, it's.

[Pat]

I feel like it's a. It's a difference. It's like, would it. She was so far away from that point, and it's crazy that we. I use that as an insult because it was, like, unobtainable at that time. It's just like you and your girl getting into it, your senior high school. You'd be like, you think you're gonna win a Super Bowl. You never gonna win a Super Bowl. And then y' all just happen to still be together. It would be funny as, hey, man, I'm about to win a Super Bowl.

[Mike]

I get it. I get it now. I think it might have been one of those things where he would have felt weird by saying congratulations without acknowledging knowing that he was hating before. Yeah, okay. I got real.

[Pat]

That's real.

[Mike]

Because in general, because I. I hate that people like, you know, the podcast is successful and shit now, and people post always knew y' all were going to make it when they might have been hating at first. So you.

[Pat]

We never know.

[Mike]

And we never know, though.

[Pat]

It got to be at least a couple of people. That's how the game. Some people left and came back. They like. They was here, and it was like, man, this ass. And they came back.

[Mike]

So I guess he's just being real by acknowledging, I mean, how wrong he was.

[Pat]

Honestly, I would do the same thing if I was Y' all. Like, if I was watching a podcast and the first 40 episodes, I'm like, okay, these dudes kind of dope, but not dope enough to keep my attention.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And then I left that podcast for, like, six months, and I came back, and in. In people I know in my neighborhood are talking about this podcast that I saw a long time ago. Oh, I'm coming back to get my props. Yeah, I've been following this, bro. I've been following this. So I get it, though. You know what I'm saying? Welcome back.

[Mike]

That is true that I've done that with a couple podcasts too. Right. You kind of take a break from.

[Pat]

It and you discover it, and then it goes a little bit more viral because they probably take the step that you needed them to take.

[Mike]

Yeah. I mean, like, I stopped watching the Joe Budding podcast as much as I used to.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Just because as you're. Or I would listen to it after we shoot, just so. Because we can have the same opinion on something, especially other podcasters and stuff like that. We can have the same opinion, but. But then they explain it. I'm like, damn, I would have explained it that way as well. Now if I explain it that way. So I'd rather not listen and just be natural with my responses to things.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

I feel like we don't talk about too much current events like that sometimes definitely die, but.

[Pat]

And they got so many people there, we're bound to have the same opinion as somebody.

[Mike]

I was listening to it the other week, and they were talking about the Cassie and Diddy trial for at least like, an hour and a half, and I was like. But I was like, damn. Because I was fast forwarding it just because I didn't really want to hear too much about it. And I forgot there's, like, six people on that podcast, too, so it is. That's why nobody's here today for our pod. But it is nice when we have Key or Gene or Paige here sometimes, too, because it's nice to bounce the ideas off of.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, like, one thing somebody says can lead to a whole nother 30 minutes. It's like opening the gate to 30 minutes of content. But we won't get that when it's just, like, two of us.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

This kind of lame. For real. Not with Dude.

[Mike]

Do you think kids lose trust in their parents sometimes? Because, for instance, like, when I was a kid and my mom says, just tell the truth, or my dad said, just tell the truth, and I'm not gonna hit you just tell the truth and you tell the truth and then you still get hit. It makes you not want to ever tell the truth because now you know the consequences because your kid is younger so you can kind of lie to him. Like you're gonna go.

[Pat]

I don't lie to my son.

[Mike]

I've seen you. Oh no, you do tell them the truth.

[Pat]

Because I'm a man. I stand up for my. The thing about it, I'm strong enough to make you do it anyway. So it don't matter. I'm telling you, we leaving. If you don't want to leave now, you leaving this now.

[Mike]

You definitely lied that you're gonna go somewhere. All right, you're gonna take your kid to the park when you're not gonna go to the park now. You don't do that. I know now, but before, because before he understood what you're here saying.

[Pat]

If you ever had a two year old, you gotta lie to it too. You gotta lie to a 2 year old because they just ask questions all day. Yeah, man, we're going to see Obama get in the car.

[Mike]

You guys just keep saying until they agree.

[Pat]

Me, your kid be obsessed with some weird ass. You want to see Obama for crazy.

[Mike]

You aren't even alive for his presidency. That's true though.

[Pat]

Might be alive for his presidency.

[Mike]

I feel like Obama, even to the people, the people that weren't even like there's too young to really be in too young for his presidency to realize that he was the president type of thing.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

I think people still feel like he's their president. You know, it's nice, bro.

[Pat]

It's nice having a president that knows how to like ease attention no matter what you say. Like if you could say all presidents the same, they all kind of do similar things. Blah, blah. The politics part I'm talking about stressing out about something in the country. But then on the flip side, senior president hit a 26 foot left hand jump. Kind of suits everything over.

[Mike]

Made himself so relatable, bro. Yeah, I think he did a good job too because I think when he was president it was social media was kind of on the rise.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

So he has a really. He's probably the first person with a really good post presidency like career in the sense of like his wife has a podcast. He's still doing speeches and stuff like that. He's still in the news and still relevant.

[Pat]

What he says a lot.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like Bill Clinton. I don't know what Bill Clinton is up to today.

[Pat]

Yeah, what he says, like just like something like when Trump became president. Obama saying that we should rally behind Trump because now he's elected means a lot for that campaign.

[Mike]

Exactly.

[Pat]

And the nation would need that. Because if Obama just came out and said, nah, I ain't rocking with it. Who rocking with me? Oh, shit. Let's go, Obama. Let's do it. I trust you. What you say?

[Mike]

This episode is presented to you by Underdog. Turn your takes into cash with Underdog by picking higher or lower on your favorite player stats. Make sure to support this show by hitting the link in the description and downloading Underdog. Sign up and deposit now using the promo code Dummies to get up to $1,000 of bonus cash and a free pick.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Lonzo ball for buzzballs.

[Mike]

Ready to go.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Cocktails. Take 12.

[Mike]

Buzzballs just dropped their biggest blue balls.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Script says biggie's blue balls. Lonzo take 13.

[Mike]

Blue balls just dropped their biggest buzz balls. Ugh.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Let's try a vocal exercise.

[Mike]

Buzzballs. Biggies. Blue balls. Buzz balls. Biggies. Blue balls.

[Pat]

Big balls just dropped.

[Mike]

Get blue balls. This season with buzzballs. Please read responsibly. Buzz balls. Available in spirit, wine and malt, 15% alcohol by volume. Buzzballs, LLC, Carrollton, Texas oh, man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What's going on?

[Pat]

What's the deal, bro?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Ain't nothing to it. You tell me.

[Pat]

I asked you a question, all right? What beef do you have and why?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Man, it's a long one, man. Ass cousin, man ratted on me, man, back in 2019. Rad ass, man up a whole goddamn operation. Why he laughing like this?

[Pat]

Funny, man?

[Ryan Reynolds]

This was serious at the time.

[Mike]

Why was he.

[Pat]

Was he actually involved in the operation?

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right, let me break it down to you.

[Pat]

Don't, don't, don't. Don't incriminate yourself, all right?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, it ain't no incriminating because it's over with.

[Mike]

Yeah, you search your time.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So check this out. Back in. Back in 2019, I was a big fraud type of guy. You know, I was doing fraud and I needed. I ain't gonna go in super details, but I needed a head to go in the bank and cash a check for me. At the time, he was the only available. So we go at it for about a month. He calling me every day. I mean, he ain't miss a goddamn beat every day, bro. We're gonna get some money today. We're gonna get some money today. I'm like, hell, yeah. But let me tell you this part. I told the. I said, hey, bro, calm this down because you Doing this every day. And I already know how this going in now remind you I'm the little cousin, he the big cousin. So he like, I don't give a. I don't all that we're gonna get this money or what? So I'm like, I ain't gonna say no to no money. Would you that I need that. Especially around this time. I needed that. So one day, I'm sitting in front of bank. He goes in. I'm like, 10 minutes pass. I'm like, damn. 20 minutes pass. I'm like, damn, this don't take this long. 30 minutes pass.

[Pat]

Now.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Now my mind start to race like.

[Mike]

A 1/4 pounder down already.

[Pat]

He's already at the station snitching on you and you waiting on to come out. Oh my God.

[Mike]

If you want dessert, you waiting on him inside there.

[Pat]

He at the station, brother, go ahead.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Real talk. That's what in that. And when I found out the story out of that, that's what really happened. So after an hour go by, I see 12 just pulling in the parking lot. My black ass I dip gone. I'm, you know, I'm starting to get nervous because, like, this ain't no. This is my cousin. So once this go down. Oh, man, all the fingers getting pointed at me. Why you hang around with this? You know this is no good. Why you hanging around with this cousin? You know, I'm the. I'm the that type of cousin in the family. So he. I get. So about round 9:30ish, I get a collect call. You have a prepaid call from blah.

[Mike]

Blah, blah, blah, blah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, bro. Hey, bro. They got me. I'm like, what you calling me for? Get the off my phone with this. I don't know that what you got going on. Get the off my phone. Two days later, he get out. Of course he the first. Of course I'm the first he want to see. So I'm like, he played it so smooth. I'm talking about smooth as hell. He like, yeah, bro, they got down got me and bro, goddamn, I ain't gonna lie to you, bro. About to hit the fan. I'm like. So I'm already looking at like, you got a wire on you? What the you talking about? He like, bruh, he's like, bro, I don't know what they gonna do. Just watch your back. And this just walked off like a movie scene.

[Pat]

I'm like, what the not saying watch your back after he already told the police on you. See, I didn't notice to see them coming.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, He. He found traditional telling that that's. That's gonna help out like ain't gonna do the. You mean a couple days later? A couple days go by next you know, police busting in cribs. He done told. He don't. After I got the paperwork. He don't. Because we weren't at my house.

[Pat]

Who was that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Who was that? Was that one of my little duck off. He don't point it on the paperwork and say he went on Google Maps and pointed out what the. The house looked like, was what. What was in the house. All type of. Oh, man, me up, bro.

[Mike]

How long you get for that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

So a lot of don't know. Fraud is. Is tricky since I wasn't the one that went up in there and cat and cast it. I really didn't get nothing put on me because they would. Because just for him saying that it didn't really mean nothing because he actually the one that had his name on the. And went in there and did it. So basically.

[Mike]

So you got.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I didn't really. Is that. Yeah, I. Because I didn't do nothing.

[Pat]

So he still got time. Yeah, you know, he snitched and got time.

[Mike]

No, you know. You know what happened this snitched.

[Pat]

No, I don't believe him.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hell no. I don't even rock like that. No, sir.

[Mike]

What's your message? What's your message to your cousin?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Ah, use a. To this day, you will always be a. All type.

[Pat]

I think he was just trying to spend more time with you. He like, bro, bro, we could be roommates, bro.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Damn.

[Pat]

No, no, that's crazy. He got caught by the police and say, hey, bro, they found us.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I swear to God. That's what he did.

[Pat]

They got us, bro. Come out of hiding.

[Mike]

I'm still tripping.

[Ryan Reynolds]

He went on Google Maps. That.

[Pat]

That's crazy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You went on Google Maps.

[Mike]

You know the up part when he went on Google Maps, you know, he did the little spread his finger things to zoom in.

[Pat]

And after he zoomed in, they said the brown or the white House? He said the brown one and put his finger.

[Mike]

And put his finger on the tablet.

[Pat]

Finger mark on the tablet, bro. He wanted you gone.

[Mike]

Just remember that.

[Pat]

You ever think about. If you ever think about reconciling with him, just always remember his fingerprint on that tablet. He pointed hard as hell. He said, right here.

[Mike]

Yo.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yo. What the going on?

[Mike]

Chilling. Hating on.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I'm hating too. What the. Yeah, I'm just playing, man. What's going on, man? How y' all doing today?

[Mike]

Pretty good.

[Pat]

What's good, Brody?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Man, I'm at work, bro. It's like 90 degrees. I'm burning the up out this.

[Pat]

Where do you work at, man?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I work. I'm in Alabama, bro.

[Pat]

Oh, damn.

[Mike]

You say where you work at? I'm in Alabama.

[Pat]

That's all you want to say?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, God. It's kind of like, on my side, you know that?

[Pat]

All right, I got a question for you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right, go ahead.

[Pat]

What moment made you say maybe I'm crazy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay. Hello.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yo, y' all dysfunctional as, bro, Come on, man.

[Mike]

We just asked you this question.

[Pat]

We just asked you the question.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I ain't here.

[Pat]

Spell dysfunctional.

[Ryan Reynolds]

D, Y is L T I, O.

[Pat]

N, A L. Oh, look at you. All right.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Mike]

He could have spelled it wrong. And I just don't have the. I don't have the message. I promise you I didn't say it wrong.

[Pat]

Nick, good speller, but he doing slave work. Anywho, all right. What moment made you say maybe I'm crazy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, man, I was. Had to be in, like, second grade, bro. I always had dreams of going to jail, bro. Going to prison? No, growing up in the hood, bro, you see a lot of niggas go to the. Go to prison. You know, they get their crib, they come back out. You know, they up.

[Mike]

You feel me, for a little bit, and they go right back.

[Pat]

So what did you, like? What was your fantasy about prison like? So you just, like, running?

[Ryan Reynolds]

They're running, bro. Controlling the traffic in that, man.

[Pat]

You know what I mean?

[Mike]

Were you living a lifestyle where you felt like you would go to prison?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Man, hell no. I was in kindergarten doing fan and bees.

[Mike]

And, bro.

[Pat]

I see smelling dysfunctional that fast. That's what they don't tell good spellers. Ain't out here for you to do in real life. But wait, dysfunctional in front of a bunch of niggas?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hell, yeah. I've been waiting my whole life for this moment.

[Pat]

Give him a word. Let's look up a hard word for this.

[Mike]

I got you. I got you.

[Pat]

No, you gotta look up a word, bro. We gonna let you get your talent off, bro, to see if you should maybe find a career spelling.

[Mike]

I got a question.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I got multiple talents.

[Mike]

I got you spelled. Spelled. Spell the word minuscule. Minuscule.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, you got me with that one.

[Pat]

You know a word too hard when you don't even attempt it.

[Mike]

I'm not gonna lie. I'm the same way. I don't even want to think about how to Spell that word.

[Ryan Reynolds]

My, that hurt when you said that.

[Pat]

He about to work so hard today at his job. He said, maybe I'm not cut out for that.

[Mike]

All right, bro.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Don't make me work twice as hard, man. Y' all too, bro.

[Mike]

All right, bro.

[Pat]

All right. Brody.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hello.

[Mike]

Yo, just stand up.

[Pat]

Hey, yo, what's good, yo, welcome.

[Ryan Reynolds]

How you doing?

[Pat]

Welcome to Crash Homies Podcast.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Thank you, thank you. Happy to be here.

[Pat]

Why he sound like that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It's on spear. Hold on, let me see if I could.

[Pat]

I don't think that's a problem.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I don't know what's wrong with it. Hello? Can you hear me?

[Mike]

Yeah, no, you sound. You sound great, bro. Ask the question.

[Pat]

All right. I got a question for you, bro.

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right, what's the question?

[Pat]

There you go. What's a moment that made you say maybe I'm crazy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

So little backstory. I would be smoking half of a blunt or a joint with the homie. We go upstairs, play some 2K, go back, finish it. It disappeared. And I was like, damn, maybe we're just. We're just high. We forgot about it. Whatever. It happened again, like, two more times. And then I started noticing little shit disappeared from my patio. So I was like, oh, it's some of these, you know, people in the neighborhood. So I was sitting down, and I rolled a fake blunt with ghost peppers and then left it outside on my patio for them to steal. I watched it.

[Pat]

Hold on.

[Mike]

You said you watched it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So I left it out there for, like, a week. So after, like, day five, I was like, oh, you know what? This is too much. They're not gonna steal it. Let me stop. I go out there, and it was gone, and then I'd have nothing disappear off my porch. I was telling my cousin about it. He was like, what if somebody's angry parent comes up to your patio? And I was like, well, I could be like, I smoke spice. Why? Why are your kids feeling shit? But then once I said that, I was like, damn, maybe. Maybe I am crazy.

[Pat]

You know what's so crazy? The investigation of, like, this random dude dying from smoking a blunt is definitely about to pop up. You go to prison. That's why he stopped showing up. You killed him.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It was just hot.

[Pat]

How you know?

[Mike]

Was it actually. Was it actual weed in there, too?

[Pat]

Wait, how he know what?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, there was no actual weed in there. You know, true. I haven't tried to smoke peppers, but when you cook with it, I mean.

[Mike]

The smell, that's hot, but no died off. No ghost peppers.

[Pat]

Open this investigation up.

[Mike]

So it was no. You said there was no weed in there?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, it was a blunt made entirely of ghost pepper and oregano.

[Pat]

Gave him a Chef Boyardee special turn.

[Mike]

That they get to a spicy margarita.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Funny about that. I think it was. There's, like, high school kids or something, and I was working at a disco at this time. They'd walk past my house whenever I was sitting on my porch, and they're like, hey, bro, you want to buy some weed for us? Blah, blah, blah. And I was like, you're, like, 14, bro. I work at the dispensary. Like, I'm good. And then after that, after it was gone, I stopped seeing them all together.

[Mike]

You already know your culprits.

[Pat]

He gave them boys some K3.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, hopefully they never steal from anybody again, at least off their porch.

[Pat]

No, that's crazy. Amen to lace and little kids is crazy. Like, you're going to prison.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know? God forbid. But what if I was out here off like, fat, you know?

[Pat]

He said what?

[Mike]

He said, what if he was awesome?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I said, what if I was out here off of set?

[Pat]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And then they're out here stealing that. But my thing is, my porch is raised, so you can't, like, see what's in the chair unless you go on to my porch. Like.

[Mike]

You should put fit in that.

[Pat]

No, you're right, bro. They take a village, though. You're doing right, bro. Good job. How tall are you, though?

[Ryan Reynolds]

How tall am I? I'm five seven. I'm short.

[Pat]

Okay. No, that's good, bro. Good people in all sizes, bro.

[Mike]

All right, bro. You have a good one, man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Y' all have a good one.

[Pat]

You too, little ass.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hello.

[Mike]

Yo. Welcome to Crashing Podcast.

[Ryan Reynolds]

What's up?

[Mike]

What up? What up? We got a question for you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Mike]

What's your guilty pleasure?

[Ryan Reynolds]

You. Mike.

[Pat]

Let me explain. Let me explain.

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right, so I've been listening to Paul for a minute, man, and, man, sometimes when I.

[Pat]

When I need some motivation to do.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Better in life, man, I go to your page, man.

[Mike]

Just.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Man, I'm like, damn, this. This guy might. Man.

[Pat]

Are your clothes on or off when you do that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, they're on right now.

[Pat]

No, no, no. When you look at Mike's page.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I played the fifth.

[Mike]

Yo.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, what's the word?

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, There we go.

[Ryan Reynolds]

There you go. First off, that Pat Audio listeners up my life like a.

[Mike]

Out here. I think it sound like Kermit the Frog.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

We out here, Big Kermit gang.

[Mike]

First off, first off, I Got a question for you first off, Patrick.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hell, yeah, that.

[Mike]

All right, I got a question for you. What's your guilty pleasure?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, Ghost in job interviews, I'm overqualified for a lot of. So what I'll do is I'll apply for this, go through all the interviews. I work for PayPal, Venmo. I do construction now just because I got bored. But I'll go through the whole last interview. Recently did this for. I think it was Terrence in college to be a recruiter. Did the whole nine, three full sets of interviews. They're like, yeah, we love you. You'll come out here.

[Mike]

No. You went to these interviews?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, yeah. Oh, went into the interview, did the virtual knock. They thought they were getting a solid ass person. I do this to boost my ego and I'm probably the reason why people can't get jobs, bro.

[Pat]

No, you're not boosting your ego. You're insecure, bro. You just want. You just want.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm like, do they really want me? Am I good enough? Let me check this out real quick. Like, yeah, I'm still out there. I'm valid.

[Pat]

Yeah, I know.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I never show up.

[Pat]

I know somebody would. Abandonment issues when I hear him.

[Mike]

Too much time. You got a girl?

[Pat]

Somebody left him before?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hell yeah. High school sweetheart. You know, we left me five kids.

[Mike]

Oh, damn.

[Pat]

Yeah, you got too many kids to be around like that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I got free time in school. What I'm supposed to do with myself?

[Pat]

What ages are your kids?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I got a 13 year old. I got a 8 year old. I got a 7. I got a 11 month old. I got a 3 year old.

[Mike]

Damn.

[Pat]

God damn. You can stop anytime, though.

[Mike]

You don't have any kids.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I got a vasectomy. I'm out the game shooting blanks like a bad shotgun.

[Pat]

I mean, at least you in all their lives, man. Good job, man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Of course. Hell yeah.

[Pat]

And you said. And you said at the beginning of the call. So I'm guess you're a black man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hell yeah. I'm the greatest thing. I'm a black dad with all his kids.

[Pat]

Hey, that's fire. Fire, E, man, that's love. Black dad, bro. I love that, man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, look, I come from a broken ass household. You can't be changed unless you want to be changed.

[Pat]

Your boy's still stupid.

[Mike]

Don't forget that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Come from Pat. That don't sound like too much of an insult sound come from Pat. Five kids. Let me ask you.

[Mike]

I appreciate you, bro. You have a good one.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, so do you think coming from.

[Pat]

Park.

[Mike]

Told me to do my thing now.

[Pat]

Shout out to buddy. Man, way to take care of them kids.

[Mike]

It's up. That. That's, like, the. The standard now. Like, that's the bar.

[Pat]

Men are very low on the standard right now, bro.

[Mike]

Yo.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hello.

[Pat]

Yo.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, what's up?

[Mike]

How's it going?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm doing good. This is so crazy, man.

[Pat]

Thanks for bringing the energy. You probably got the highest energy we had on here today.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know what they say.

[Mike]

What'd they say?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know. I just wanted to.

[Pat]

What? All right, let's ask the question. All right. Who do you have beef with and why?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I have beef with my ex thing because he ended things by calling me boring, and I just think that's so ridiculous. Like, I just think I'm so fun.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know.

[Mike]

Let's. I guess we can ask you some questions to determine some things.

[Pat]

Let's see. Let's see. Okay. What's your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It depends on the mood. Either one, I want to be shaking ass on a rooftop. Or two, probably something wholesome, like drinking coffee or something. You know, fun things. I'm versatile.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know why you call me boring.

[Mike]

What do you do?

[Pat]

I'm getting sleepy.

[Mike]

What do you do for a living?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I talk on the Internet.

[Mike]

No, no.

[Pat]

What do you do for a living? For real.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I'm being serious.

[Pat]

What do you do? Like, do you describe. Do you get paid to do that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Well, yeah, and. Well, I do. I'm a student, too, so.

[Pat]

All right. If you had to. If you had unlimited amount of money and you can plan any date that you can for you and your date, what would you. What would you do?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I would probably go to Japan because I love sushi and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Fast and furious. You know what I mean?

[Pat]

Yeah. What's the dude. What's it. What's the dude's name?

[Ryan Reynolds]

That, like, I can't. I can't say. He's, like, married himself now. That's weird.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah. I'm sure he found the one directly after this.

[Mike]

How soon after did he get married? Married? After. After you.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I mean, he's military, so it was really bad, you know, but good for him.

[Pat]

Did he ever actually explain what specifically was boring about you?

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I think he was trying to end it, and then I was, like, egging it on way too much. Like, I was just asking him way too many questions. He's like, you know what? You. I just don't feel Incompatible, because, like, you're just a little too boring for me. I was like, dang, I'd rather him call me, like, a broke ass bitch or something. Like, boring is crazy.

[Mike]

So were there signs that the relationship wasn't going good? Like, was. You know, like, before every relationship ends, it was, like, probably over. It probably was over a couple.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. Yeah. I think I was just delusional.

[Mike]

So what was. What was the vibes like then?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know. I was younger, stupid. I mean, he was like my. Like my first grown man. That makes.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Pat]

Yeah, I don't like the way that sounded.

[Mike]

Yeah, this is.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

I don't know where he got boring from.

[Pat]

Yeah, you're not boring.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know. Yeah, that's what I. Exactly.

[Mike]

You don't know.

[Pat]

He don't know what he missing. He's so stupid for getting married and being happy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I know. Who wants marriage when you can have a fun girl?

[Mike]

Does he have kids, too?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know. I stocked it one time and I blocked him.

[Mike]

Oh, you stalked them, too?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It was just the one time.

[Pat]

Yeah. You're curious. So what exciting things are you doing? So what you doing? What you doing this weekend?

[Mike]

Yeah, what. What are your plans this week?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I'm seeing a concert in Atlanta. Fun. It's a Latin artist. I don't know if y' all.

[Pat]

No, you got. You don't have to explain your whereabouts.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay. Yeah, probably like a seafood boil. Yeah. And that's it.

[Pat]

What about next weekend, though? Because that's. I think we just ran into a good weekend. Let's. Next weekend will probably be more regular for you. What would that be?

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know, just protecting my peas. Reading a book or something. It's about versatility and diversity in life. Okay. Not be honest.

[Pat]

No, you, like, naturally make me.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, it's okay.

[Pat]

I promise you, every yawn that I had, it was real. But no, he tripping. He tripping.

[Ryan Reynolds]

When I get to Yalls age, I'll be on it, too.

[Pat]

How old are you?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm 23.

[Pat]

I'm 23. Okay. That Barnett 23 is crazy.

[Mike]

Wait, that's your friend in the background?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Can I talk to her or him? Yeah, let's.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, go ahead. Oh, hello.

[Pat]

Hello. Oh, let's see if you more exciting. Hey.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat]

She got way better energy than us.

[Mike]

How did y' all become friends? Because I just want to kind of get a gauge on.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh. Oh. This is actually a really good story. I'm like, this is actually the perfect question. So we actually met in high School. We were going on a trip to Paris, and we still debate which airport we met. I say that we met at the airport, at the Amsterdam airport. But you said we met at the Detroit airport. We still fight about it, but, yeah, we met on a trip to Paris and we've been inseparable since. So our first little. Our first little getting to know each other was in Paris at the Eiffel. The Eiffel Tower. You know, just casual. Yeah. Nothing. Nothing major. Yeah. Yeah.

[Pat]

I hope y' all look good.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, don't worry about you. Wow, that's crazy. The animosity is just a little crazy. That was a bit.

[Pat]

Whoa.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm like, what other story is better than that?

[Pat]

Like, you right. You right. Right now we. We clip farming. Because that wasn't that important. That wasn't that great because me and Mike, like, let, like, met in Sheboygan or something. Like, we boring as hell. Like, that's actually exciting. So we was trying to clip farm and it actually end up being exciting. So it. It backfired on us.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I imagine. Imagine being from chan.

[Pat]

Exactly. So y' all boring asses win this round.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. Y. Y.

[Pat]

Look, they bad. They about to ju Me fight. Then this be more.

[Mike]

This some exciting right here.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I literally. Yeah, yeah. Bye. Bye.

[Pat]

Now they never calling us back again.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, hey. I got a story for y' all.

[Pat]

All right, all right. Let me ask a question first.

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right, my bad.

[Pat]

No, you good, you good. Who do you have beef with and why?

[Ryan Reynolds]

So, my ex best friend. Because I walked in on her sleeping with my man at the time. Well, it really wasn't my man because he had a baby mama, and I didn't know he had a baby mama and she was still pregnant.

[Mike]

I don't know if the math is mathing for me right now.

[Pat]

Okay, Your ex. Your ex best friend is a girl.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes.

[Pat]

Okay. And she was having sex with your current boyfriend. I mean, at that time.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, at that time.

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah. And then. But he wasn't really your boyfriend because he had a baby mama.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. And she was still pregnant. I think she was, like, five, six months pregnant.

[Mike]

But was he with her baby? His baby mama?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, absolutely. Had a whole tick tock tase and everything.

[Mike]

Oh, damn.

[Pat]

You gotta do a little bit more research. What? Okay, next question. How long was that your best friend before that happened?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Probably like four or five years.

[Pat]

And then how long was that your man before that happened?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Maybe like four months.

[Pat]

Oh, okay. Yeah, Good on you. Lost a little weight off you. You good? What's Your message to your best friend, though. Well, your ex best friend.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm not gonna lie. I've been riding down her street and I. When I catch her. When I catch her. When I caught her the first time, I pulled the. Whipped her. But then I gave her a chance to fight. She didn't want to fight. I haven't seen her since then. But I'm looking for.

[Mike]

You introduced a weapon.

[Pat]

Yeah, I bet she don't want to fight. Ain't no win for her because if she win the fight, you're just gonna pull the picture pistol back out.

[Ryan Reynolds]

But it was. That was gonna be fair ones. I just need to. We could have been friends again. But, you know, I just wanted to fight and that was gonna be that. But she didn't want that. What.

[Pat]

What position was in?

[Ryan Reynolds]

She was riding him like a rodeo. Like, she was riding him like she was going crazy. I ain't gonna lie. I give her the kudos for them. They didn't see me when I first walked in because I was off the edible and I was quiet. I was. I just thought something was going on. So I opened up the door and they in my bed. Boy crazy.

[Mike]

Oh, it was your bed?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, my house, my bed.

[Mike]

Okay, I understand. The pistol open now?

[Pat]

Yeah, that's crazy. That is crazy.

[Mike]

I get the pistol open.

[Pat]

So you went. So you saw it and went back and grabbed the gun.

[Ryan Reynolds]

So. Okay, so I opened up my room door and I seen it, but I was like, that's not what I saw. And so I'm thinking, oh, they didn't see me open the door? No, they didn't see me open the door. So I opened the door again, and they. They were just so into it. They didn't see me walk to my closet and open up my. My case. And by the time they realized I was there, they both got physical. No words scattered like roaches.

[Pat]

Sound like they got some good chemistry there.

[Mike]

How's your relationship life now? Have you made better decisions since then? I guess.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, yeah, it's great. I'm gay now.

[Mike]

Oh, congrats.

[Pat]

Don't pistol whip nobody else.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, no, I won't do that.

[Pat]

Don't pull out your gun unless you're gonna use it because you know what I mean.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Oh, I use it.

[Pat]

No, no, no, no, don't use it. But don't pull out your gun if you only gonna pistol it because somebody might overreact.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm ready for whatever happens.

[Pat]

We know I lost someone over here. We got you. Appreciate you.

[Mike]

All right. You have a good One.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You too. Hello.

[Mike]

Hello. Welcome to Crashing Podcast.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hi.

[Mike]

We got a question for you. What moment made you say maybe I'm crazy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay, so I allegedly ran over.

[Mike]

The.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sperm donor with my car. But in my defense, I was pregnant and I had just did a favor for him, dropping him off to the airport. He left his phone at the house. He left his wallet at the house. Asked me to grab it. I was like, okay, cool, I'll do that for you. Grabbed it. Didn't think nothing of it. Taking pictures of myself, you know, before I go and drop it. Back off to his job. Before this, I had never gone through a phone. So I was like, you know what? Let me take my pictures on Snapchat because Snapchat got a better camera taking my pictures. And Snapchat has, like, the little, you know, like a little private portion or whatever, because my job guessed his password to get into his phone. Niggas are dumb. So I figured, okay, it's probably the same password. And it was. Come to find out, his dumb ass was in Jamaica. Mind you, I knew he was going to Jamaica, but there was a video. Videos of him.

[Pat]

Of him.

[Mike]

Sorry, videos of what?

[Ryan Reynolds]

They. Videos of him. Some girl in the shower. And, you know, Snapchat got a time stamp, and so I can see the date, I can see the time, and I'm just scrolling through, and at that point, I'm high. I mean, one pregnant, and it's past the point where I could do anything about it, so I'm fucked. And so I get to the messages because of course, you know, gotta line it up. He's talking to three other bitches like, that's crazy.

[Pat]

So how far along were you in the pregnancy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I was two months. Two and a half months. So just as the literal cutoff point. And so at that point, it just is what it is.

[Mike]

I'm sorry to establish who he is again, because it's confusing me.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sperm donor.

[Mike]

Your sperm.

[Pat]

But that's not your dad. That's usually what people call their dad, though.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That beat. Yes, that is. The deadbeat that is. He's not a baby daddy because baby daddies at least will see the child.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Pat]

Child is born now and he doesn't see the child.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Correct, Correct.

[Mike]

I was throwing off on it. Sperm donor.

[Pat]

Yeah, I thought it was her dad, too.

[Mike]

No, I thought it was a legit sperm donor.

[Pat]

Oh. I mean, he is technically.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I mean, at this point. At this point, that's being courteous as far as I'm concerned.

[Pat]

No, Shot him out, so.

[Mike]

So did he deny it, though, when you. You confronted him about it, there's nothing.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That you really can deny because he, mind you, he's at work. I had just dropped him off at work, and he. I'm taking a long time to get back because where he lives is only like three minutes away. He asked me to wrap his wallet and phone so I could have. I should have been back. So he called my phone from, like, mind you, he worked at Walmart at the time. So he called me from, like, the landline that Walmart has, and he's like, hey, where you at? And I'm trying to be calm, but that's just not who I am. So I'm like, bitch, who the fuck is Tatiana? And he was like. He's like, huh? And so I'm reading the messages verbatim, like, just going through them. No, no, no, it's not what you think. It's not what you think, y' all.

[Pat]

It's crazy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Y' all, like, what are we talking about?

[Pat]

Videos? And be like, no, that is crazy.

[Mike]

It's not what she thinks.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like, it's not true.

[Pat]

Like, you got the baby.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I can't see you setting up the camera. Oh, come on now.

[Pat]

What position was he?

[Ryan Reynolds]

My son. Look here. They was in the shower. So how many positions can there be?

[Pat]

I know a couple.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Okay, see, you just flexible. That's, you know, that's why. That is a lot. That is a lot.

[Pat]

He not strong or nothing.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Look, he was, I guess, strong enough to deal with her. It is. What I know is when I got to the job, because my job told him, like, I'm not coming up there. You got me up. I had already taken pictures on my phone, sent them to myself, sent something to his mama, because who am I if I'm not petty? Went to the banking app. You got to do what you got to do. Because the least I could do is get some money out of it.

[Pat]

His mama. His mama probably saw them videos and be like, I did not teach him how to. Like that.

[Ryan Reynolds]

She calls herself a concubine for his dad because. Cheating on her. So she was. Yeah, they all kind of in the head a little bit. That's that Jamaican, I don't know.

[Mike]

How much did you sell yourself then?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Whatever was an account, which was not nothing because the Was working at Walmart. Like, if we gonna be honest.

[Pat]

That.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Look, I could give him some coupons, get an employee discount. The least you could do.

[Pat]

So. So. So he still hasn't met the kid. Met your kid?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, he. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

He.

[Ryan Reynolds]

He's met him, my son. It mind you, this was a while ago. This is a couple years ago. So my son is, like, six now. This was, of course, before he was born, but he hasn't seen my baby in, like, four years.

[Pat]

God damn.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, his mama sends money and it's like, all you gotta do is call, but that's tough. Look, I. I'd rather like, I told him either all in or all out, so I'm not tripping. It's honestly for the better. I'm not. Oh. Which is why I am glad that I allegedly ran a down my car beforehand. At least I got to do that.

[Pat]

Did you. Wait, did you run him over or did you just ran him down?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. No.

[Pat]

How many.

[Mike]

How many.

[Pat]

How many wheels went over his body?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It was his foot and his ankle and he was. It's broken. It was broken. So he was booted up. He had. I drove to his job and he had kind of, like reached over me. He was like, no, you're not keeping my phone, because, like, I'm not giving you your phone. He had reached over me, kind of, like pushed me back, grabbed it out the car, and I, of course, hit the gas because who wouldn't? So now he's, like, holding on to me while I'm driving in this fucking Walmart parking lot. Door wide open, there's a nigga on the side. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Y' all not gonna believe this. Went live, apparently talking about to his Facebook. And he ends up, like, trying to, like, get me to stop. Like, stop, stop. And I kind of do. And he's trying to plead his case. He's trying to get in front of the car. That's where he up. Why would you get in front of a car that I'm clearly willing to drive? So he get in front of the car thinking that, oh, I'm gonna just back up. Please. My momma ain't raised no hoe. Hit the gas.

[Pat]

When. When you put it in drive, did you actually look down and see, like, the drive part?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like, we was making. We were making eye contact. I put that in drive and I said off.

[Pat]

Muscle memory. Oh, you filthy. Oh, my God.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Come on, now.

[Pat]

Oh, you really.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You know your car. Come on now. You know your car.

[Pat]

You was looking up in his eyes to put it in drive. You tough. You tough.

[Ryan Reynolds]

You had me up. I'm pregnant with your child that you begged for because you know it. It's always pro choice over here. It's always pro choice over here. But you beg, cry, pleaded. You know, I'M pregnant and you cheating on me. You got videos of. It's like three, four girls in the phone. Oh, I don't know her. That's my cousin, bitch. You're fucking filthy.

[Mike]

Cause that's what the sex of your cousin is. Crazy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Your cousin, like, what the type of time are you on?

[Pat]

He's pulling the cousin car.

[Mike]

The cousin car.

[Ryan Reynolds]

The cousin car. But we're not. But we're not blood cousins. We're just, you know, like, it was.

[Pat]

Just funky talking about he tried to pull the.

[Mike]

Is it incest if you. Your actual cousin, your blood cousin.

[Ryan Reynolds]

It is instant. It is incest. If that's your step cousin, I wouldn't give a. Y' all are weird.

[Mike]

So people would rather do claim incest and take accountability.

[Pat]

That's what I'm saying.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Come on now.

[Mike]

Like you said, even as a cousin, it's still cheating.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Don't even be trying. Don't even be trying to be for real. At least put some effort into the lie. Like, damn, am I not worth the effort?

[Pat]

He ain't had none. He like, damn, that cut everything.

[Ryan Reynolds]

That shit is crazy.

[Mike]

No, go ahead. Sorry.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sick. No, you're fine. But that cousin card is sick.

[Pat]

No, you don't need. You don't need him, dude. It's stupid, though. Like, he don't sound like the smartest dude, so.

[Mike]

But props to you, though. Oh, no, props to you for raising a. A six year old by yourself.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, I appreciate that.

[Mike]

Happy Mother's Day.

[Pat]

Happy, happy.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Thank you so much.

[Pat]

Happy International Woman's Year. How about that.

[Mike]

Talk?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Your talk. No, that's why you deserve everything.

[Mike]

Happy International Woman's World.

[Pat]

Oh, what a.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Get some cool points one way or the other.

[Pat]

Yeah, exactly.

[Mike]

All right, you have a good one.

[Ryan Reynolds]

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[Mike]

This episode is brought to you by Stay Farm.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Knowing you could be saving money for the things you really want is a great feeling. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with the personal price plan.

[Mike]

Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state.

[Mike]

Coverage options are Selected by the customer.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.

[Mike]

Hey there, travelers. Kaley Cuoco here.

[Pat]

Sorry to interrupt your music great artist, BT Dubs, but wouldn't you rather be.

[Mike]

There to hear it live?

[Ryan Reynolds]

With Priceline, you can get out of.

[Pat]

Your dreams and into your dream concert.

[Ryan Reynolds]

They've got millions of travel deals to.

[Mike]

Get you to that festival, gig, rave.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Sound bath, or sonic experience you've been dreaming of. Download the Priceline app today and you.

[Mike]

Can save up to 60 off hotels.

[Ryan Reynolds]

And up to 50% off flights.

[Pat]

So don't just dream about that trip.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Book it with Priceline.

[Pat]

Priceline.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hello? Yo, can you hear me?

[Mike]

Yes, sir. Can you hear us?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yes, sir. Bro, what's up?

[Pat]

What's up?

[Mike]

Not much. Not much. Got a question for you.

[Pat]

All right. What moment made you say maybe I'm crazy?

[Ryan Reynolds]

So I'm not gonna lie. I'm talking to this girl, right? So I find on Instagram, I add her or chat, and we're chatting.

[Pat]

And knowing me, like, you got to.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Know what you're getting into, you know, like getting into. No crazy. And I'm not. So I go on Facebook and I'm. And I'm looking everywhere. I go on tick tock, all that, bro. Then I go to her Facebook, I find her, like, basically ancestors. And I accidentally added her, like, grandma. And then I guess I accidentally sent notifications when I did that. And she sends me a screenshot, bro, of her grandma saying, do you know this boy? And then I was basically just clicked after that.

[Mike]

It's so stupid.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like. And then I like, it's. And then the post was like, some, you know, where moms be always reposting those, like, companies about, like, giveaways, bro. It was one of those. And it was her shared post and I loved it. I was like, I'm so cooked. I'm so cooked.

[Mike]

What'd you say? What'd you tell her after you she asked you that?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I said, that's not me, that's someone else. I think I just told her it was a bot account or something. I couldn't claim it, bro.

[Pat]

Oh, did she believe you?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hell no.

[Pat]

What she say?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I just said, damn. And then I left it at that, bro.

[Pat]

The next thing I knew, I just.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Had an X by her name. I was like, I'm so cooked. She was bad. And she was bad as hell.

[Pat]

If there's one thing you could say to her, what would you say?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Take me back.

[Mike]

Do you got a girl now?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Nope, I don't, bro. I don't the thing was that. That was like, three weeks ago, too. That was recent.

[Pat]

Yeah. You gotta stop.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I used to go to my college.

[Pat]

Yeah, you gotta stop being so weird. It's actually weird that you, like, that you went and found her grandma that you clicked on her grandma.

[Mike]

Who are you holding hands with in your profile picture?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I ain't holding hands with nobody.

[Mike]

You legit. Are holding hands with somebody in your profile picture.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I'm not. You gotta look into. That's my boy. That's my boy.

[Pat]

No, y' all in the same profile picture.

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right, look at that profile picture.

[Pat]

We. We not each other's profile picture.

[Mike]

You had no solo pictures of yourself?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know.

[Pat]

He got plenty on his page. I'm looking on his page, but he want this one of him and his boy to be his profile picture.

[Mike]

But why y' all holding hands, though?

[Pat]

Yeah, do y' all?

[Mike]

Bro, it's 2025, bro. Be yourself. All right, you have a good one.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yo, what's going on?

[Pat]

Welcome to Crashing Podcast. What's good?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Appreciate it, man. Sorry, just one quick second. I'm just getting out of work real quick.

[Pat]

All right. You got it.

[Ryan Reynolds]

All right. Yeah, I know. You know, you guys are good to weigh and everything. Appreciate it, guys. All right. No, no. All right, I'm good.

[Mike]

All right. What's something funny that shouldn't be funny?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, so when I was a kid, I lived with my dad. My parents separated, like, right when I was born and stuff. And I live my dad for a couple of years, but one year, it.

[Mike]

Was right around my ninth birthday.

[Ryan Reynolds]

He is taking me to the airport for, like, my yearly visit to go see my mom. And the whole ride to the airport, we're talking about, like, what we're gonna do when we come back or when I come back. Like, he's gonna take me to the movies. He's gonna take me out to an amusement park I wanted to go to because of my birthday, and. And then I went up to visit.

[Mike]

My mom, and I was there for.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like, two months or so. And, yeah, eventually it got to a point where she started looking at school. And I'm like, what's going on here? Like, am I not going back to live with dad? And she's like, nah, you're here now. Like, he. He left. And I'm like, what do you mean? And then she told me that the last thing that she heard of him was that he got on a cruise to Hawaii, and that was about 14 years now. So.

[Pat]

Yeah, you haven't seen him in 14 years.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Haven't seen him, haven't talked to him, nothing. It's like he literally dropped off the earth, so it's kind of funny when you think about it.

[Mike]

Did you play any sports growing up?

[Ryan Reynolds]

Nah, nah. He tried to get me into basketball.

[Mike]

But.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm not too tall. Didn't work out.

[Pat]

There it is.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah. But, hey, I can cook, though.

[Pat]

Hey, you have 14 great birthdays without him.

[Ryan Reynolds]

To hell with him.

[Pat]

You don't need him, bro. Yeah. What'd you do now, man?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I. I'm kind of doing my own thing. I got married. I have a kid now.

[Mike]

Hey, I'm there.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know, you there. That's tough.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Or repeat the process.

[Pat]

Just like his granddaddy. He started right back.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I got a daughter now, bro.

[Pat]

Oh, there you go.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I don't know if she's not too good at cheerleading it. It might be it, but. No, I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking.

[Mike]

What's your message to your. Your dad?

[Ryan Reynolds]

14 great birthdays, you know? Nah, for real, though. Yeah, you, dude. There's not really too much to it, because that was the up part, is that I had hope. I was going back. Like, we literally spent it. Would we live maybe an hour away from the airport?

[Mike]

So he was like, what was this, like.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Like 2011?

[Mike]

What?

[Ryan Reynolds]

It was that Battleship movie. Like, I was really into Battleship at the time, and I was, like, trying to see that Alien movie, and. And then, yeah, I never got around to seeing it, and I was excited about that. The whole summer, I'm talking to all my friends where my mom lives, and I'm like, shout out.

[Pat]

Your mom, though.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, we. We had a falling out a little while back.

[Pat]

Oh, damn. Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, my whole family's falling apart, bro.

[Pat]

Yeah, you're like Batman. Yeah.

[Mike]

Honestly, there's one common denominator, though.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, no, no, no, no, no. I. Yeah, okay. It might be me. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

[Pat]

But here's. No. Is your wife. Oh, you. You at work. That's right.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Ryan Reynolds]

No, I'm in the car right now.

[Pat]

Your wife is definitely. Yeah, your wife probably at home in bed with the neighbor.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, chill out.

[Mike]

All right, bro?

[Ryan Reynolds]

I'm going back to work.

[Pat]

This no shout out to you, though, Brody. All right.

[Ryan Reynolds]

I appreciate it.

[Pat]

Y' all keep on keeping on.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, appreciate it. Love the podcast, man. Been listening since, like, episode 20, I think.

[Pat]

Pretty damn, bro.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah, y' all been doing great. Proud of y' all.

[Mike]

I appreciate that.

[Pat]

Appreciate you, son.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Hey, appreciate it. Y' all have a good one.

[Pat]

Shout out to my niece. She won a championship, middle school basketball.

[Mike]

Congrats to her.

[Pat]

Thank you. Thank you. First place.

[Mike]

First place. Let's go.

[Pat]

Okay. But I. What I saw there was probably funniest I've seen all weekend. This dude who's in a wheelchair, and obviously he didn't have, like, feeling in his legs, so his legs were, like, kind of dangling, like, on the floor. And two little kids walked by, and they both stepped on his foot. Like, they stepped on his foot, like, pretty hard.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

But then I. I saw it, and I'm like, oh. He didn't react that he doesn't have any feeling in there, but dude stared down those kids for, like, 10 minutes like he was mad as hell. And I thought about it. I never realized it's not just about the pain of somebody stepping on your foot. It's the principle. Because he didn't feel.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And I realized he's probably even more mad because that's the most work his shoe gonna go through.

[Mike]

Yeah. Oh, my God.

[Pat]

You know what I mean? Like, his shoes probably don't get dirty any other way.

[Mike]

No creases.

[Pat]

No, he had no creases. That was clean.

[Mike]

It depends how they get in the shoes.

[Pat]

Little badass kids, bro. I was pissed warm, bro.

[Mike]

Where was this at?

[Pat]

This is in. This was in water for Michigan.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Oh. First of all, let's go back to something, cuz obviously the. The running joke now is, you know, the funny thing is that ever since I said I don't be saying I'm Nigerian on the pod, it makes me say it more now.

[Pat]

But you're Nigeria.

[Mike]

But no, those are kind of funny. Keep it up. But what I want to say is that you say you're from a certain place. You say you're from four different places on this podcast.

[Pat]

I never said I was from anywhere.

[Mike]

Yes. Oh, my God.

[Pat]

Why is this. Why is this. Turn on me?

[Mike]

No. You say you're from potty Pontiac. You say you from Nebraska, and then you're saying you from. What do you call it? South Carolina.

[Pat]

No. North Carolina. Shout out to Charlotte, North Carolina. Shout out to Pontiac, Michigan.

[Mike]

So how can you say. And you say you're from Milwaukee. So you say you're from four different places.

[Pat]

Huh?

[Mike]

You say you're from four different places.

[Pat]

And you on four different places, dick right now. Four dicks balancing all.

[Mike]

The. Oh, Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there.

[Pat]

First of all. First of all. First. That's what I thought you was gonna say.

[Mike]

No, go ahead.

[Pat]

Happy. Happy belated Mother's Day. But I was at this place, which. I don't know why. It just went on my head. Oh, I was at this place. It's kind of like a party vibe, barge vibe. And I walked in, and the security guard was like, 5 7, 1. 65. And then I saw another security guard. He was about 5, 8, 1. 75. And I was like, damn. And I looked around at the people. Like, it wasn't like a. A crazy vibe, but it was definitely a vibe. Like, if a fight happened here, I wouldn't be crazy surprised. You know what I'm saying? And I'm like, bro, whoever fight here, y' all gonna be fighting for a long time. Ain't nobody coming to break that up. But they had them dudes that they was dressed like those basketball.

[Mike]

They might be able to fight, though.

[Pat]

No, no, no. They must got. They must be. They must got that drink.

[Mike]

I had a theory, though. So I was saying that you got to be careful about how you talk about your. Your friends, exes, Especially if they just broke up.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

Because say you date your friend, break. Just breaks up with the girl, right?

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And you start telling him how you really felt about the girl. Saying, like, she was. I always knew that she wasn't this and that. Just for him to get back to back with that girl always. So it's just like when the initial breakup happens, you shouldn't talk about your friends. Like the ex.

[Pat]

Correct. You should do it before. Just a reoccurring thing. And that girl, you and ain't you know that, right. She don't love you. And then say the same thing.

[Mike]

Have you ever been in a relationship that, like, that. That has happened, like, in the sense.

[Pat]

Of, like, where people were currently, like, currently telling me that it wasn't it.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat]

And then make you like the girl even more. Nobody want to see us again.

[Mike]

I do think that puts a battery in people's back, because I think people don't want to feel like they're making a bad decision. You know, we all think we're doing the right thing sometimes. That's like, I want to do everything in my power to prove everybody wrong by staying in this relationship.

[Pat]

I get those people, though. I can't tell you how many times I've been in a situation where I've been in a coupley spot. Right. There's like seven couples in this area, and if you rank the couples by what you think their love is, sometimes you have a couple on the bottom, like they toxic. I don't think they gonna last.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And it was always a couple that lasts for some weird ass reason. Like it's always a couple like, damn, they still together. Like damn. Then she like three of his friends, I guess. Hey, man, love is love, baby. It all matters. But yeah, I don't know why that was always last. But I will say I apologize to some people if I ever offended you. Okay. Because I was on. I had like a five and a half hour car ride too because I drove. I like driving.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Everybody be getting on me about driving. Like, why you just fly. I like driving. I like the, like the, the road trip feel and I like to stop in Chicago on the way too. But I was driving and I was like, man, this is a perfect time to call everybody that I ever wanted to apologize to. You know what I mean? Kind of like men the fence. Like, like, let's get this out the way. If I ever feel like I was wrong and even if I wasn't wrong, if I took part in something going bad, then I want to call that person and get over with. So five and a half hour trip. I listen to music for five and a half hours and call nobody.

[Mike]

Dude, I was gonna say, do you have beef like that?

[Pat]

No, I ain't got no beef like that. I don't know why people be assuming that though.

[Mike]

I, I guess you kind of give, kind of give off that.

[Pat]

I don't give off that vibe. I've never, I don't, I don't beef with people.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Oh, I want to get it over with very quick, quickly.

[Mike]

I was driving and then I saw a tow truck behind me, right. Or like two cars behind me and it started flashing his lights and I started people getting like over for the tow trucks. And when it got behind me, I didn't move over because. Are you supposed to pull over for tow trucks? Tow trucks don't got the light privilege of even, even if they have their, their lights flashing.

[Pat]

If that tow truck. No, no, no, I'm not pulling over for no tow.

[Mike]

Exactly. So I kept my to.

[Pat]

But I'm not pulling over for no.

[Mike]

Tow truck because I'm pulling over but getting out. You know how like an ambulance is coming through.

[Pat]

Oh, they was getting over.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Oh, they good people, man. I'm not that good of a person. I got a lot of repentance before I get to that kind of mode to get over for a Tow truck. So you can take your time in front of me.

[Mike]

I was like, I'd have never seen a tow truck with their lights on.

[Pat]

Nah, you ain't got that much power, bro. That's what I'll be saying about them city buses. I don't care how. I don't care how you angle your bus. You gonna kill me or what, bro? You gonna lose your job over this. Okay, Tweet of the week. Seeing a girl cry over you. Oh, a girl ass. Seeing a girl cry over you don't hurt you.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Pat]

Then somebody comment said, I turn around.

[Mike]

I can't see you like this.

[Pat]

No, I can't. I can't. Oh, okay. Oh, I got something for you. I got a challenge for everybody that's not driving right now. Don't do this while you're driving. Okay. So I was trying to get a Uber somewhere, and my Apple pay didn't work. So I'm thinking, immediately somebody hacked my car. So I'm checking all my bank accounts. I'm like, damn it. Don't say nothing is wrong with my Apple pay. So what's going on? So I looked it up on Reddit. Like, what happens if something is wrong with travel page? And they said it's probably because you have too many tabs open. So I was like, oh, I'm gonna close my tabs, and I'm actually going to count how many tabs I have open. And I had 67 tabs open.

[Mike]

That's not that bad. 67, I think, compared.

[Pat]

How many you got right now?

[Mike]

Like, I've. I've closed tabs and I've had, like.

[Pat]

Just count. Go.

[Mike]

266.

[Pat]

Dude, how you count that?

[Mike]

It's at the bottom.

[Pat]

Oh, that's on the Internet.

[Mike]

Yeah. What the.

[Pat]

I was talking about, like, ab. Who. What the, bro? Yeah, you're psychotic. 266.

[Ryan Reynolds]

For what, bro?

[Pat]

Just clear.

[Mike]

I don't know how to clear it.

[Pat]

What are you going back to now? You too deep in. He stopped deleting.

[Mike]

No, I'm not starting to do the. Yeah, just random ones, I think. You know, like when you click on something on the Internet.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And it opens to Safari. Yeah, I just don't close out.

[Pat]

Oh, you get sent a lot of links. Yeah, I don't get sent that many links. Disrespectful. Look it up, bro.

[Mike]

Like.

[Pat]

Yeah, I can't get a link. My boy.

[Mike]

You talk about the app ones, right? How do you even, like, click it? This is real Unc mode.

[Pat]

Like this? Like this. Oh, God damn.

[Mike]

Wait, how?

[Pat]

Like this.

[Mike]

Oh. All right.

[Pat]

And then scroll up, count them.

[Mike]

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 20. One, two, three, 4, 3, 5, 2, 6, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 71, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 81, 2, 3, 4, five, six, seven, 8, 9, 10, 91, 2, 3, 4,5, 97, 97, 97. That was a good clear out though.

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah, that's a good clear out.

[Mike]

Your first.

[Pat]

Your phone will work a lot better now. But what you also just taught every guy in here is that this is why your girl is unsatisfied. That's 97 seconds. And that's how long you've been lasting a little bit, man. They like, that was a long time. I wasn't that long, my boy.

[Mike]

I was just watching a video on YouTube. I think his name was Ome. But it was talking about like how streamers and YouTubers and these people like, like how they kind of go through these like humiliate, humiliation like rituals type of thing in the sense of. So there was a clip of no Neck J. Right.

[Pat]

Ain't getting dark.

[Mike]

No, no, no.

[Pat]

You literally like your voice like went down and it sounded like one of them.

[Mike]

Like, I'm chilling. Right. But there was a video of, of no Neck J. And he was kind of like talking about like how he, he makes. When he makes a YouTube video because he has his own YouTube channel.

[Pat]

Channel.

[Mike]

It doesn't get no views. But when he's on other people's YouTube channels, they get views because. And I think the person was talking about that because he's being laughed at so much. When you kind of start your brand of being like a, a circus almost and like make fun of me because of this and you letting other people make fun of you and poke fun of you. Poke fun of you when you're like the butt of the joke every time.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

It's hard for you to actually do something outside of the, the joke because I'm not going to just get on camera, start joking about myself stuff.

[Pat]

Right.

[Mike]

You're on those dating shows, those 20v ones. And all this other stuff because of your appearance, the way you talk, the way you do something. So people are always going to expect that. But if it's like, I don't know, I just think like a lot of these new creators, they should like a little chill out a little bit with like making people make fun of them in a sense like that. And you, it's always good to be, have some humility and make fun of yourself and stuff like that. But like, you can't be the joke every time. You gotta like show some other things.

[Pat]

Yeah. And I think, think sometimes it's about somehow flipping it like within that same wave. It's like, okay, I know why y' all here. But I' ma change it to this kind of seamlessly. But if he's, if it's off his appearance, then it's very hard.

[Mike]

That's what I'm saying.

[Pat]

It's gonna be real hard to flip that. And it's like. Because it's always going to be present.

[Mike]

Because it's like him. The what's the, the no neck. The what's the long neck?

[Pat]

That long neck you got the dude.

[Mike]

The wide neck.

[Pat]

Yeah, wide neck. Him. Him. I think he was like in jail or something. Yeah.

[Mike]

But I'm just saying those type of, those characters in a sense is like they're, they're known for their looks in a sense where it says like if. And their looks being a joke.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

So it's hard and hard to make a career that way. And just like the money is so short lived. We're supposed to have no neck jams. Probably he wanted, he wanted us to, to pay him to come on the pot. We're like, no, we're good. Which is understandable because that's how he probably makes his money. But it's just like we're not going to pay nobody to come on the podcast either.

[Pat]

No, no, no, no. Especially when we had like, not to. No disrespect.

[Mike]

No.

[Pat]

But we had way more popular people do it for free.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Because they actually rock with the podcast. I don't think we'll ever have anybody on here that's like, that haven't watched our podcast because it won't be fun. Because we don't want to do an interview. We don't want to reach out to somebody and they're like, yeah, yeah, how much y' all gonna pay me? And what questions are y' all asking during the interview? We don't even know what questions. And we not about to ask you. No tmz. Worthy stuff we were talking about like your childhood on here. Some jokes listener callers like I do not care what relationship you was in in 2022 bro. That shit don't mean nothing to me man.

[Ryan Reynolds]

This episode is brought to you by Amazon Prime. From streaming to shopping, prime helps you get more out of your passions. So whether you're Whether you're a fan.

[Mike]

Of true crime or prefer a nail.

[Ryan Reynolds]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

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[Mike]

We help you save. Selection varies by location while supplies last. Discount taken at time of purchase. See Sales Associate for details.

[Pat]

Offer valid 515 through 528.

[Mike]

McCrispy strips are now at McDonald's. I hope you're ready for the most dippable chicken in McDonald's history.

[Pat]

Dip it in all the sauces.

[Mike]

Dip it in that hot sauce in your bag. Dip it in your McFlurry. Your dip is your business. McCrispy strips at McDonald's. Oh, there was another tweet of the week or a Facebook post I saw. So the person said I hate couples that doordash together. And so he said they be in the car arguing over my food, not my hamburger. Got bad energy. That is true. I have seen a lot of couples do doordash together or Uber eats, whatever the delivery service is. And I don't really get that. I feel like I like that though. I feel like it should be a divide and conquer thing. Like you're both like if you're Uber. If you're doing Uber eats or doordash. Right. Let's say high end, you're making 25 an hour. That's already split in half.

[Pat]

I like I I commend the men that do it.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

With their woman. Especially if their woman is on the account count.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Because if I see a woman drop off my ubereats and I had and I ordered it at 11:30 or 12 and she, and she's the one that actually dropped it off, I'm actually concerned for her. Like you shouldn't be out in like no Apartment buildings or houses or neighborhoods by yourself at 12am Especially in like.

[Mike]

A crazy ass world, I guess because you the way people are.

[Pat]

Yeah, just like the way people are. So I like when the man is like with a woman, like they protecting their women while she making some extra.

[Mike]

It be broad daylight.

[Pat]

Huh?

[Mike]

It be broad daylight.

[Pat]

Broad daylight says the can happen now.

[Mike]

What is he doing though?

[Pat]

But I've been in the Uber where the dude had his wife and it was a Uber like he's taking me and his wife was in the front seat and she started talking to me. I said don't talk to me only about Uber driver.

[Mike]

Now the Uber drivers be funny these days. Some of them be having their earpiece in their, their, in their ear and they'd be having like actual conversations. It'd be different languages most of the time. But sometimes be like, but they talk so low. So it's like.

[Pat]

Right. Uber drivers are most interesting people.

[Mike]

When I get, when I get home, can you put the, the food in the microwave for me so I can eat that?

[Pat]

Oh you, oh you talking about you.

[Mike]

Hear them that hear them conversating.

[Pat]

Oh, okay.

[Mike]

But it's so, you know, I lost.

[Pat]

You for a minute and when you.

[Mike]

Start doing that whisker and you ain't.

[Pat]

Seen my body language, I started like moving on away from you. I was like, oh, this go like crazy. I'm going to start podcasting like this now was.

[Mike]

I was, I did start talking like this the whole podcast. Would that be, would that be kind of annoying?

[Pat]

I just stop podcasting.

[Mike]

Would that be annoying though?

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah, I'll be done.

[Mike]

I've gotten in trouble or I've gotten said like in arguments in past relationships. Like I don't yell in a sense. Like I don't like angry yell. Right. My voice might get a little loud.

[Pat]

But I don't like you naturally loud.

[Mike]

Naturally loud.

[Pat]

Loud ass.

[Ryan Reynolds]

Yeah.

[Mike]

But my, my tone doesn't change though. Like I talk just like this. And in past relationships they always said that was pretty annoying because it just sounds like I don't care.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And in those moments I think I really just didn't really care in a sense. Not like, not care about their feelings, but more about care about arguing. And I feel like sometimes in relationships, like I think people thrive on arguing. I feel like, like it. If they're not arguing, they feel like something is wrong.

[Pat]

Man, you ever. I don't, you know, obviously it, it come. I'm just glad I never picked up that trauma.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

To take to my next relationship. Because. Because some people probably develop it. That was a first real relationship and it was yelling. So like, now they think, like, that's how all relationships are supposed to go. All that yelling and arguing stuff is, like, very, very pointless. Especially when it's over, not nothing.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

If. If I figure out that this conversation is over nothing before you do. Oh, you gonna hate me? Because I'm about to laugh a little bit. I'm about to get some chuckles in, like, bro, what are you talking about? Life is way too important to be arguing about this. That's when. That's when you, like when someone can't gauge how, like, unimportant something is, that's when you start looking at them differently. Oh, you think this is the most important thing in the world.

[Mike]

Okay, I know. Because especially, like, early on in your relationship and they arguing about something that's really pointless, and they, like, really are sold on this non. Things like what happens when it's something worth arguing about.

[Pat]

Yeah. You know, and I understand like, you. You have to be mature in knowing that two humans cannot spend that much time together and not have petty little arguments. No, for sure it's gonna happen, but it's all about the recovery time for me. Like, how long does it take you to figure out, like, hey, we arguing about nothing? Less fix it. Because, like, if everybody does something petty on accident, whether you know it, you could be having a bad day and your partner asks you something and you respond in a rude way, but you wasn't intending for that. And it's about your recovery time to go fix it. Like, oh, even if it take you like an hour, it's like hours, like a decent time. You know what I mean? Like, even though it's a little long, but that's fine. Those people, that'd be like, It'd be like 48 hours and they still don't realize, like, hey, you kind of tripping come to you 72 hours from now. You're right, I was tripping. Like, bro, you just wasted three days.

[Mike]

Of my life, bro, I figured out it is so hard to go to bed angry at, like, your partner in general, because especially if you argue. If you argue and then you go to bed and you sleep in this, obviously sleep in the same bed, you. You inherently gonna, like, do stuff that you're used to, you know, try to cuddle and stuff like that.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Like, without really knowing, just like based off muscle memory in your sleeping. And then you wake up in the middle of the night, you see your arm right away, she's like, hold on.

[Pat]

The worst is when you can't show them a meme that's funny. This is gonna have me. You know what? Let me put this in my notes. You start making a list when baby girl ain't mad at me no more. The list soon as y' all get back.

[Mike]

Oh, man.

[Pat]

Since we cool, look at this. Look at this.

[Mike]

No, not being able to send your girl a meme during the argument has to be, like, top five, like, most painful things.

[Pat]

Now, that hurt because, you know, you're.

[Mike]

Like, no, she really gonna LA at this. But I can't even, like, make her laugh right now.

[Pat]

It'd always be something weird. Like when you're in the past relationship and y' all arguing and her dad texts you something funny. Like, damn, can you tell her it?

[Mike]

That's a funny concept, though, because it is true when you're in arguments. You can't even tell on, like, your partner or even your friends that you're in beefing with good things that happen in your life too. It's just like, you can't even, like. Like you just had a baby. Like, no, I can't even tell my boy that I'm beef with. I just had a kid.

[Pat]

I need that 1500.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

I need my 1500 back for this. Congratulations. My boy. The tutor and the baby is what it is. Ain't getting no blessing from me, man. I was watching the old Jersey Springer clip. This is why Jerry Springer stay relevant for so long is because they just thought of different ideas. Like, it wasn't always fighting. They always did something. Sometimes it was a competition. I literally seen two dudes. It was arguing over a girl, and instead of fighting, they went outside and played 1v1 basketball. And Jerry Spring was actually keeping score. It was like live broadcasting. And a girl was just watching her it, bro. And I was like, damn, that's kind of crazy. But I did learn.

[Mike]

Wait, they were making the. The two dudes go against each other, like, play basketball for her love.

[Pat]

Yeah, look, it was like three to four. She just watching this.

[Mike]

They got their shirts off and everything.

[Pat]

Nate versus Raymar. I tell you what, he is.

[Mike]

Nah, Jerry is the goat, though. I think he. He blended, I think kind of like what we kind of do with the listener callers, too, in a sense where it's like. Like, I. Obviously a lot of those scenarios weren't real in a sense, but they were. A lot of them were real but played up. And I think he understood, like, the clip economy that we're in right now. You Know how things we're so into like short clips.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

It was really good a retention from the beginning of the show to the end of the show because it was like. The pacing of the show was good. Interesting hook, right? And in the middle hit you with something again. In the end it hits you something again. So you hook through the whole thing.

[Pat]

You gotta realize like some of the shows that's popular now, like the baddie shows or any show that they like fighting on and stuff like that, that's technically Jerry Springer. Yeah, like Jerry Springer really started all that stuff, like drama and fighting on TV and then interviewing the people after. Like it was a game show.

[Mike]

But it's dope now that YouTubers now are making their own game show. Like to pop the balloon stuff.

[Pat]

Yeah, like, that's tough.

[Mike]

I think sometimes like, like hit or miss on it sometimes. But I. I also have never watched a full episode and then I've never.

[Pat]

I've never. I've never even watched a full clip of someone going down the line.

[Mike]

Yeah, I just. Clips.

[Pat]

Yeah, it's always right.

[Mike]

It's always shout out to her too, because she got the Netflix deal thing. Even though they heard there it's not going too well. The Netflix people are not really liking it because she's not even a host. Blah, blah, blah. But a lot of these YouTubers are doing their own show. The 20V ones, as annoying as those are. Yeah, it is.

[Pat]

That's the only thing about that game. The originator doesn't get. Get as much credit.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I mean?

[Mike]

So it's like easy to replicate.

[Pat]

Yeah, it's easy to replicate. It's like, what am I technically stealing? You know what I'm saying? Like, because.

[Mike]

Because somebody can do a 20v one.

[Pat]

Right.

[Mike]

And it started off normal 20v one. But then when you introduce a celebrity and you have access to these celebrities, it is like, damn, my idea is just getting taken away from me.

[Pat]

But do a 20v1 with Obama when the Internet.

[Mike]

That would go so crazy.

[Pat]

Pop the balloon with Obama before we end the pot. We'll be in Atlanta on the day.

[Mike]

They listen to this.

[Pat]

Will it be there?

[Mike]

Oh, no, no, no, it's not.

[Pat]

On the 28th.

[Mike]

Max Wednesday.

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah. We'll be in Atlanta on the 28th. Let us know who y' all think we should work with when we out there. Who you think think we should reach out. Only out there.

[Mike]

Because I'll be. I don't really be knowing. Like I know some creators out there, but I don't know, like, everybody that.

[Pat]

Lives, because it could be somebody that's based out there that don't rep ATL per say. So let us know. Usually, like, when people let us know, we can actually see if they already like the pod, because sometimes we'll look up some creators that y' all say, and they already follow the pie. And we just, like, we probably don't know about them because we're not in that space. So just, you know, hit us up. Let us know.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's been crash dummies, episode 208. Appreciate y' all subscribe to the Patreon and. Yeah, peace.

[Pat]

Get the Patreon. Please, please, please, please.