Crash Dummies Podcast with Pat and Mike – Episode 216: "Scissors, Cellmates & Bail Money"

Release Date: July 23, 2025

In Episode 216 of the Crash Dummies Podcast, hosts Patrick Johnson and Michael Esiobu delve into a blend of pop culture, current events, and personal anecdotes, all delivered with their signature humor and candidness. This episode covers a range of topics from superhero debates to a high-profile cheating scandal involving a corporate CEO, alongside discussions on what constitutes a legend in the music and sports industries. The hosts also engage with audience interactions, offering advice and sharing listener stories that add depth and relatability to the conversation.

Superhero Showdown: Superman vs. Batman

[01:07 – 03:35]

The episode opens with an engaging debate on the contrasting approaches of two iconic superheroes: Superman and Batman. Pat and Jean dissect their methods of upholding justice, highlighting Superman's inclination towards non-lethal interventions versus Batman's more aggressive tactics.

Pat:
"Superman literally waits. He tries to save the people that are doing bad to the city... But as the big dude about to fall, he goes save him because he doesn't want the person to die."
[01:12]

Jean:
"Batman just seemed like he actually enjoyed beating people up though."
[02:34]

The discussion underscores Superman's focus on justice without bloodshed, contrasting it with Batman's relentless pursuit of criminals, regardless of the severity of their offenses. This segment not only showcases the hosts' differing opinions but also reflects on the broader themes of justice and morality in superhero narratives.

CEO Cheating Scandal at Coldplay Concert

[04:15 – 08:58]

A significant portion of the episode centers around a recent scandal involving the CEO of the Astronomer Firm, Andy Bryan, who was caught cheating at a Coldplay concert. The hosts analyze the incident's implications on his personal reputation and the company's standing in the public eye.

Pat:
"If Superman like, bro, if my family member died and Superman came and swooped up that just killed my family member and said I’m about to take him to jail, be like, what the."
[02:00]

Jean:
"With the company... investors’ confidence are kind of like weary now."
[15:03]

The conversation delves into the fallout from the event, questioning whether the CEO should resign and how his actions might have affected investor trust and company morale. They discuss the blurred lines between personal misconduct and professional responsibilities, emphasizing the challenges leaders face in maintaining both their personal integrity and their company's reputation.

Pat:
"They trying to... they probably got drunk and Coldplay... they tried to use it for something…"
[07:19]

The hosts also explore the cultural impact of celebrity behavior on corporate governance, suggesting that such high-profile incidents can serve as distractions or even publicity stunts that may shift public focus from more pressing national issues.

Defining Legends: Music and Sports Icons

[11:09 – 39:23]

Pat and Jean engage in an extensive discussion about what makes an individual a "legend" in various fields, particularly in music and sports. They debate the criteria for legendary status, weighing factors like cultural impact, longevity, and personal achievements.

Jean:
"Nicki Minaj is the number one woman rapper of all time, easily."
[32:48]

Pat:
"People got mad at you for calling Kyle Lowry a legend. No, you called him a legend. He is a legend."
[35:06]

The conversation touches upon influential figures such as Nicki Minaj, SZA, basketball players like Kyle Lowry, and even extends to sports broadcasters and other cultural icons. They argue that legends are not only defined by their professional success but also by their ability to influence and resonate with the public over time.

Jean:
"Sometimes the legend word too is kind of tough. They're like the definition."
[35:06]

This segment provides a nuanced exploration of fame and legacy, prompting listeners to consider the multifaceted nature of what it means to be a legend in today's ever-evolving cultural landscape.

Listener Interactions: Cheating, Relationships, and Red Flags

[40:00 – 85:44]

Throughout the episode, Pat and Jean interact with listeners' questions and stories, offering advice and sharing personal experiences. Topics range from infidelity and relationship dynamics to humorous anecdotes about everyday situations.

Listener Call – "Am I the Asshole for Trying to Steal My Homeboy's Girlfriend?"
[61:23 – 65:25]

A listener named Mio presents a dilemma about pursuing his ex-girlfriend who is now with his friend. The hosts dissect the situation, highlighting the importance of self-respect and recognizing red flags in relationships.

Pat:
"You gotta wake up, though. You got a better evaluation process for you."
[58:43]

Jean:
"Are you her? But that's true, though."
[72:36]

Through such interactions, the hosts provide relatable and often humorous takes on complex relationship issues, encouraging listeners to reflect on their own situations with a mix of empathy and straightforward honesty.

Listener Story – "Scissoring at a Party"
[73:02 – 86:36]

Another listener shares an awkward encounter where he and his friend walk into the wrong room at a party, witnessing a scissoring incident. The hosts navigate the conversation with a blend of humor and curiosity, seeking clarity on the event.

Pat:
"They were scissoring. I don't know why you have to think about scissoring."
[75:02]

This story highlights the hosts' ability to handle diverse and unexpected topics, maintaining a light-hearted yet inquisitive tone that keeps the conversation engaging and entertaining.

Additional Discussions: AI Usage and Plasma Donation

[86:14 – 95:57]

Beyond the main topics, the hosts briefly touch upon the pervasive use of AI in daily life and the concept of plasma donation, infusing these discussions with their characteristic humor.

Pat:
"I saw that dude got written up at work for being too musty. Yeah. He got written up at work for being too musty."
[79:38]

Jean:
"I've seen one time how much you guys see out here today that's doing good? Like what's a dumb, dumb job that you know, stupid, but people are dumb enough to buy into it."
[89:45]

While these segments are shorter, they add variety to the episode, showcasing the hosts' ability to pivot between serious and light-hearted topics seamlessly.

Conclusion: Community and Support

[95:57 – 98:09]

In the latter part of the episode, Pat and Jean emphasize the importance of community support and personal growth. They encourage listeners to focus on self-improvement and maintaining healthy relationships, all while promoting their Patreon for additional content and upcoming live sessions.

Pat:
"Tell them that we sent you Crash Dummies. Tell them that we sent you us."
[21:09]

Jean:
"Peace."
[98:09]

The episode wraps up on a supportive note, reinforcing the podcast's commitment to fostering a connected and engaged listener base.

Notable Quotes:

• Pat on Superman's Justice:
  "Superman literally waits. He tries to save the people that are doing bad to the city... he doesn't want the person to die."
  [01:12]

• Jean on Batman's Methods:
  "Batman just seemed like he actually enjoyed beating people up though."
  [02:34]

• Jean on Nicki Minaj:
  "Nicki Minaj is the number one woman rapper of all time, easily."
  [32:48]

• Pat on Relationship Red Flags:
  "You gotta wake up, though. You got a better evaluation process for you."
  [58:43]

• Pat on AI Usage:
  "I just don't like when people like, don't ask the chat or the grok more questions about it."
  [83:14]

Final Thoughts:

Episode 216 of the Crash Dummies Podcast offers a dynamic blend of humor, insightful debates, and relatable discussions. Pat and Mike adeptly navigate through a variety of topics, providing listeners with both entertainment and thoughtful commentary on contemporary issues. Whether debating superheroes, dissecting corporate scandals, or offering relationship advice, the hosts maintain an engaging and authentic connection with their audience.

For those who haven't tuned in yet, this episode serves as a perfect introduction to the podcast's unique style and the hosts' chemistry. Be sure to subscribe and check out their Patreon for exclusive content and upcoming live sessions.