She Called Off The Wedding - Episode 237

Summary

Crash Dummies Podcast: "She Called Off The Wedding" – Episode 237

Date: December 17, 2025
Hosts: Pat (Patrick Johnson) & Mike (Michael Esiobu)
Theme: Real-life relationship chaos, infidelity, accountability, and hilarious listener stories

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Episode Overview

Pat and Mike dive into a wild ride of current events, work scandals, and listener confessions centered around disastrous relationships, infidelity, and personal "ops" (enemies). The episode blends social commentary on cheating and workplace power dynamics with their patented irreverent humor and listener call-ins—most notably a man whose fiancé called off the wedding just eight days before the big day. Through every story, they challenge assumptions, roast each other and their callers, and explore what it really means to be accountable (or not) in relationships.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Unreliable Narrator: Tricking the Older Generation

• Timestamps: 00:00–03:12
• Pat jokes about how easy it is to trick older people about things that never actually happened, riffing on generational divides and the perils of bad older drivers on the road.
• The guys satirically suggest a senior Uber system and riff on using old people as GTA-style passengers for missions and errands.
• Notable Quote:
  • Pat: “The older generation is cooked.” (00:08)
  • Mike: “If you’re over 65, there should be free Uber.” (01:34)

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2. Podcast Announcements and Tour Info

• Timestamps: 03:12–07:00
• Updates on Patreon discounts, live show sell-outs (Chicago, Houston, Charlotte, New York), and their logic behind city choices (“It’s tough for us to travel knowing we only gonna make a certain amount”).
• Banter about “double stuffed” Patreon episodes leads to classic Crash Dummies innuendo.
  • Pat: “Two at the same time.”
  • Mike: “Single stuff. Pat got y’all.”

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3. The Michigan Coach Scandal & Workplace Affairs

• Timestamps: 07:00–16:25
• Discussion about Michigan assistant coach Sharon Moore's firing for (alleged) workplace infidelity, the power imbalance in workplace relationships, and the escalation to self-destructive behavior (“threatened to cut himself with butter knives”).
• The guys debate whether infidelity is worse now or just reported more, touching on generational double-lives and the impact of the internet.
• Reflection on the fallout: what losing everything (salary, family) says about unchecked temptation and status.
• Notable Quotes:
  • Pat: “That’s a horny bro.” (11:44)
  • Pat: “If you run into a heap of money…that person needs to be monitored for the first two years.” (13:30)

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4. Perspectives on Cheating, Power, and Double Standards

• Timestamps: 16:25–18:30
• The story of ABC anchors (T.J. Holmes, Amy Robach) turned scandalously-married, and NBA star marriage swaps (Curry family) prompts a discussion about infidelity’s public consequences and gender dynamics.
• Pat: “They switched spouses. Wife swap. That used to be a show.” (17:38)

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5. Call-In Segment: She Called Off The Wedding (The Main Story)

• Timestamps: 18:30–26:01
• Young HEF (rapper) shares:
  • Losing all his women at once, reflective cooking, and finally: being dumped eight days before his wedding.
  • Pain and confusion: “She came home one day...and said, ‘I don’t know if I want to get married no more.’ Gave me the ring, and I packed my shit and I was gone.” (21:55)
  • Coping using music: releases an album inspired by the breakup, "All Besides Being Young." Performs an acapella verse ("Before you go, please just know I tried...").
  • Airs out his feelings: “You’re a dirty… I don’t wish you the best. I wish you the worst. I hope your dog die.” (26:05)
  • Discusses a song about the ex’s roommate and post-breakup anger.

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6. Female Callers and Relationship Expectations

• Timestamps: 28:04–37:42

• First Caller: Complains about post-breakup life, wishing for another “provider,” and difficulty dating now that she’s on her own—especially with the “50-50” modern dating debate.

  • “I need a man to fully provide for me. I can’t do this life. It’s hard out here.” (28:39)
  • Admits: “If money comes out of my pocket, that’s where I draw the line.” (36:46)
  • Pat and Mike reflect on compatibility, compromise, and realism in relationships.
  • Mike: “What are you providing?” (35:39)
  • “No kids? No God?” – the pair joke about her non-compromising stance. (37:22)

• Discussion: The hosts critique relying solely on provision instead of building something mutually, with honesty about one’s expectations and compromises.

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7. More Callers: Unpacking Heartbreak, Regret, and Self-Sabotage

• Timestamps: 37:54–45:08
• Male Caller:
  • Admits he “shot himself in the foot” by being the always-available friend to his high school sweetheart, who is now marrying someone else.
  • Struggles with unrequited love, bisexuality, and feeling left behind.
  • “Tattoo that on your face…you shouldn’t be hating on her being married. Crazy.” (42:22)
  • “I don’t discriminate…got hella options.” (44:47)

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8. Loyalty, Hustle, and Family Drama

• Timestamps: 45:18–51:46
• Female Caller:
  • Venting after a medical procedure, her real “op” is cousin Jamil who took money from their grandmother and threatened violence when confronted.
  • “Pay grandma her money, you bum ass nigga.” (48:23)
  • Details on family beef and potential live show in North Carolina.

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9. Toxic Encounters & Sneaky Links

• Timestamps: 52:00–56:51
• Male Caller:
  • Shares how a sneaky link left nails in his car—caught cheating, lost his girlfriend; refuses to date the cheater: “She a cheater.” (54:19)
  • “You deserve to be broken up with. Right?”
  • Claims redemption: “I'm married with a kid now, bro. I don't play with my vows." (56:00)

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10. Pop Culture Pet Peeves: Hating on Timothy Chalamet

• Timestamps: 57:17–61:24
• Caller:
  • His “op” is actor Timothy Chalamet—”He’s the same in every movie and all his little fans say he’s better than Leo.” (57:42)
  • Unnecessarily compared to Robert Downey Jr. and other big names.
  • Final message: “Stop saying you’re like the next coming of Jesus and just…let your movies talk.” (60:24)

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11. Pocket Watching & Friendship Boundaries

• Timestamps: 61:27–66:17
• Caller: A caller’s biggest “op” is his mooching friend who always expects him to pay: “He looks up to me like I’m Mr. Beast or something, bro.” (64:39)
• Pat advises ending the freeloading friendship: “He literally holding you back, bro.”

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12. On Social Media Negativity and Viral Justice

• Timestamps: 66:17–85:32
• Pat and Mike discuss how social media negativity breeds negativity, the dynamics of viral justice (doxxing racists) and the value of just logging off.
• “People turn the computer off.” (82:48)
• “I don’t want to ever write a negative comment on someone’s [page]…what if I’m wrong?” (83:32)

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13. International Celebrity, Messy Fans & Event Hype

• Timestamps: 85:33–88:44
• Discussion of Messi failing to appear at an event in India, sparking riots—commentary on fan entitlement and how rare celebrity events abroad are extra hyped.
• Pat: “Not many people sliding through there.” (88:34)

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14. Pragmatic Relationship & Life Advice

• Timestamps: 68:46–75:49
• Extended riff on choosing compatible partners, arguing over hypotheticals, and never lying about who you are or what you like early in a relationship.
• Pat: “You love this shit, bro. Like, me, I love going out. I will never lie to a woman again.” (72:52)

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Best Quotes & Unforgettable Moments

• "She came home one day, said I don't know if I want to get married no more... Gave me the ring, and I packed up my shit and I was gone." — Young HEF (21:55)
• "If money comes out of my pocket, that's where I draw the line." — Female Caller 2 (36:46)
• "You deserve to be broken up with. Right? You agree?" — Mike (54:35)
• "Tattoo that on your face…you shouldn’t be hating on her being married. Crazy." — Pat (42:22)
• "She a cheater." — Male Caller about his sneaky link (54:19)
• "Pay grandma her money, you bum ass nigga." — Female Caller re: cousin Jamil (48:23)
• "If you're over 65, there should be free Uber." — Mike (01:34)
• "That’s a horny bro." — Pat, describing Michigan coach scandal (11:44)
• "He looks up to me like I’m Mr. Beast or something, bro." — Young Man (64:39)

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Listener Stories – Timestamps

• Wedding Called Off (Young HEF): 18:30–26:01
• Single Woman Seeking Provider: 28:04–37:42
• Unrequited High School Love: 37:54–45:08
• Family Beef (Jamil): 45:18–51:46
• The Sneaky Link Nails: 52:00–56:51
• Timothée Chalamet Hate: 57:17–61:24
• Mooching Friend: 61:27–66:17

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Tone & Style

• Warm, quick-witted, irreverent, but empathetic when necessary.
• Unfiltered commentary with humor, callous honesty, and rapid back-and-forth roasting.
• They foster a space for callers to be vulnerable but aren’t afraid to call out contradictions or hold people accountable.

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Conclusion

The episode packs a master class in how not to handle a breakup, a wedding, or a workplace romance—but it's all undercut by the Crash Dummies signature: making you laugh even as you cringe. Relationship failures, cheating, modern expectations, and unfiltered listener confessions all collide—offering as much catharsis as comedy.

Perfect for: Listeners who love real stories, unflinching honesty, crowd participation, and friends who “keep it real”—with a laugh.

Transcript

[Mike]

I feel like so good now that you legit can trick your grandparents and like old people into thinking something happened that didn't happen.

[Pat]

Yes, the older generation is cooked.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And like maybe we should start actually doing more car accident videos so they stay off the road. Because it's getting to a point where the older I get, the less I have compassion for older drivers.

[Mike]

Why?

[Pat]

Because I'm getting close to that age. Like I feel like in 40 years I'm gonna be 70, right? Yeah, I'm close as hell to y' all age, bro. I still got it.

[Mike]

40 years.

[Pat]

40 years, bro. Y' all still out here. Like the most up feeling is not the fact that they driving slow, right. It's the fact that they make you an evil person because you just assume. My assumption is that there's a person just like me in front of me.

[Co-worker]

Okay.

[Pat]

Like that has to be an able person right in front of me. You know what I'm saying? You should have the best hand eye coordination you have. So you must not be paying attention. So you with my time. So now I get on side of you like, no, you need to fix how you driving. And it's a 95 year old military veteran black dude. He's just looking at me like, I'm so sorry.

[Mike]

What do you think? What's the solution then? They have their own drivers or they have like a senior citizen only lane.

[Pat]

They should just ask for rides.

[Mike]

You can't do that.

[Pat]

We should just be able to pick up old people and drop them off.

[Mike]

Like they should have free Uber services. If you're over 65, they literally should

[Pat]

be able to walk to the edge of the street. And just because they survive this earth so long, we all have to pay homage to them and get them a ride to where they going. Because somebody is always going where they going.

[Mike]

People are going to start abus using them. They're gonna start using their grandparents to get free rides.

[Pat]

Now they go, they gonna start keeping old people in their cars. Like when you do on GTA to a pedestrian. You ever broke into a car on GTA and you keep the person in the passenger seat. Like you never slow down. Like dog, you staying with me.

[Mike]

He's getting free rides to do drive bys with the grandpa.

[Pat]

No, bro, you need to go drop that old dude off. Nah, bro, he cool to have in the whip, bro. Bro, all you say he was driving past target, just drop him off, bro.

[Mike]

Just cheating on their family with their grandpa car. Grab them in the car. Yeah, for a free ride.

[Pat]

No, that's crazy. No, I promise. I'm telling you, I just picked up one of them old people, baby. I'm gonna be on the way home. Nah, you lying. Show me the.

[Mike]

No, that's crazy.

[Pat]

This is said. Look what you just did.

[Mike]

You just heard. You. She just heard what you said. Now she's crying.

[Pat]

Now she's crying. That's what you get for always accusing me. Anyway, as soon as the FaceTime hop off the girl take off the gray wig. Hey, ain't no gritty.

[Mike]

She tricked. I didn't even know.

[Pat]

I didn't even know.

[Mike]

No.

[Young Man]

What?

[Pat]

I thought she didn't have no teeth. All right, that's crazy. You said that.

[Mike]

No, I did it. That was. That was Patrick Tate that said that.

[Pat]

Hey, somebody make it to where Mike said it. Just comment. Just be like, I can't believe you said that.

[Mike]

Mike. No, that's dick.

[Pat]

Ry, man, drop the pills in the chat it.

[Mike]

Anyway. Welcome to crash dummies, episode 237. I'm Mike. Got Pat here. Just me and you today in the studio. We're doing a Patreon episode next week. Gene and Key is going to be on that.

[Pat]

I made me so uncomfortable. But, like, I feel like you don't acknowledge that. I'm sorry to interrupt your intro. I hope you remember.

[Mike]

It was fine.

[Pat]

Okay. But just like, if, you know, it's me, you in the room, you don't

[Mike]

think that needs the intro?

[Pat]

No,

[Mike]

I don't know. I feel like I'm just still going with the flow. I'm going with the flow.

[Pat]

Yeah, that's. This sounds very like you're a predator.

[Mike]

That's crazy.

[Pat]

He tried to lower me to sleep. Hey, man. Just going with the flow. We alone, you know.

[Mike]

Oh, my gosh. All right, we got live show, Chicago live show. Sold out. Shout out to y'.

[Female Caller]

All.

[Mike]

Make sure you guys, you know, come to the show. Make sure you guys, the people are coming to the show. We really want y' all to participate in the show, so don't be afraid to participate in the show. We're gonna have some games and like that. They asked us to do a second show at 9:15. We really didn't want to do. Because it's nine. It's Sunday.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Mike]

So if you guys really want a second show, we need how many. How we. How many?

[Pat]

We need. We need 130. We need. No, no, no, no. Not DMS. We need emails that we can put on the list to be notified if the tickets become available.

[Mike]

Yes.

[Pat]

So that's how professional you Got to be. So some of y' all actually got to go make an email. Yeah, my fault.

[Mike]

Yeah, we need that. Or you can go on the ticketing thing and, like, request, but let's just keep one. We need at least 130 of y' all to DM us those things, just to know that it's worth doing.

[Pat]

You know what I mean?

[Mike]

Like, a Sunday. 9:15 is kind of. If it was a Saturday, we would have did it, but it's a Sunday, so. Also, Patreon is half off this month. And then the last announcement, we got the Patrick Cloud episode. Giving you guys a little taste of what's on Patreon. We're dropping that on Saturday.

[Pat]

Like, your vocab is just crazy.

[Mike]

Giving you guys a little taste of what we got going on. Is that. But listen, who talks like that? Like, even in, like, just say, like, if I'm trying to be sexual. Right?

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Is that the way the route to be sexual? I'm trying to. I'm trying to let you taste this. Like, people text that. People talk like that.

[Pat]

It sounds like, like the. Like the opening to, like, an orgy.

[Mike]

Oh, my God.

[Pat]

And then, like, in, like, the person.

[Mike]

That boy, Patrick is so freaky chat, man. I put freaky chat in the past.

[Pat]

I like. I like that.

[Mike]

But we're dropping that episode Saturday on YouTub.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Mike]

What else we got?

[Pat]

That. That's really it. We'll obviously hit y' all up about more dates. Oh, yeah, we're going Houston, Charlotte, New York.

[Mike]

Big announcements coming.

[Pat]

Top of the year, Omaha, Nebraska. Now, shout out to the big. We probably not sliding through that, but I'm just saying this is. This is what I'm gonna get at. The more popular the show gets, the more places that we can go, because we know we can take the biggest arena in that city and make it work. So right. Right now, we're not going to travel just money wise. It's tough for us to travel and knowing we only gonna make a certain amount.

[Mike]

Yeah, exactly.

[Pat]

When we get there and we travel there when we know we can make bigger amounts in other places. But we gonna. We gonna get to y'.

[Mike]

All Also because the holidays are coming. We're gonna drop the next week's episode on Monday.

[Pat]

Monday the 22nd.

[Mike]

The 22nd. We're gonna drop the episode on 20 seconds so y' all can enjoy time with your family. But also those last days of work, I know those days are the longer days. So we got. Y' all gonna drop the episode early.

[Pat]

So Patreon members Y' all double stuffed.

[Mike]

Oh, that's crazy. Double stuffed.

[Pat]

Two at the same time.

[Mike]

N. That's crazy. I'm not part of that, so I'm

[Pat]

not part of it either.

[Mike]

Single stuff.

[Pat]

They're the one that's taking two at the same time.

[Mike]

Single stuff. Pat got y'. All. Did you see the Michigan coach News? That's always a question. I know you saw the Michigan coach.

[Pat]

Yeah, man. I got a text, bro.

[Mike]

You did?

[Pat]

Yeah. They say he tripping.

[Mike]

What do you mean?

[Pat]

You can just see, like, I ain't going to lie with Sharon Moore. You can just see that look in his eyes.

[Mike]

Like, you just know, like, he's crying for Harbor.

[Pat]

Yeah, it's just like. It's just like this certain gloss over a nigga eyes. Like. Yeah, he'll lose it all over some dumb shit.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's. I think. But I think that's a big thing in, like, society now about the. The attractions to your co workers. Yeah, there's a lot of, like, infidelity that happens.

[Pat]

I don't say now. It's just, like. More reported.

[Mike]

Yeah, more reported. Especially I think it's more reported now when it's the. It's when there's people in higher positions, like having an affair or having relationships with people that they. They manage, they hire. There's that power dynamic that. That's why jobs make you report those type of things.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Pat]

If you. If you ever been in that situation where you, quote, unquote, dating your boss, you should definitely sign some papers.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Just be careful, because obviously, especially when you work directly under that person, that person can dictate your schedule, make your schedule easier. Maybe you're not paying a fee for a certain thing and just make life easier, all because of the relationship. And you think it's love, but in reality, he giving you stuff that he ain't got to pay for. And then when you get pregnant, he come over to your house and threatened to cut himself with butter knives. I guess.

[Mike]

So, like, the thing, too.

[Pat]

How you know somebody crazy. I hate when somebody's not, like, in a dangerous position and then they threatening suicide. Like, bro, come on now. You just took four ibuprofen pills. Go lay down, buddy.

[Mike]

But, ah, man, it's. It's a. It's a. It's a. A freaky. A freaky epidemic. I think.

[Pat]

Freaky f Ne as people just need to have more.

[Mike]

I think it's that sexual control.

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mike]

I think there's a lot of that. And I think it's like, I I do think relationships do form at the workplace because if you think about it, a lot of people spend more time with these people, the people that work with and they do their own family sometimes. Especially if you just say you working eight hours a day and call it nine. If you're doing overtime and all that other stuff and then you get home, it's like you're there with your kids and your wife and like, maybe like five more waking hours. You think more or eight more waking hours.

[Young Man 2]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And you can't really complain at work. I feel like work is like the person you with at work or your friend at work, that's always like the getaway from, like, the actual job you're doing there. So it's always never like, there's no. Really no tension and stuff like that.

[Pat]

Exactly, bro. I just hate the narrative that the world is getting worse.

[Mike]

Yeah. It just gets. I guess it's more publicized.

[Pat]

It just more publicized. Like, people report stuff more. You see more recordings of people. I heard somebody yesterday, like, man, men ain't never cheat this much. Like, are you fucking joking? Like, do you know what they was doing in the 70s? I'm talking about two different families.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And obviously there's no Facebook for anybody to report anything. So it's just maybe there is less cheating because they wouldn't get caught like that back in the day. They were just doing it way worse. Like, there's like, you're. But you have a brother and sister out there somewhere. You don't even know.

[Mike]

But you would think, like, with the. The rise of the Internet and people knowing that people would try to be more careful or just not cheat, obviously. But also, you know.

[Pat]

But no, bro, I think, like, that shit has to be in your blood. It's not about, like, obviously there's some people that if they couldn't get caught and you see them in those situations, like, they just have like a quote unquote immunity situation where they know, like, this has a very low chance of getting back to my girlfriend or boyfriend. Like, that's. Then you see those people cross that line. Yeah, but then you got some people like that just in their blood, man. That's what you see. People get caught cheating in the dumbest spots, and it's just like, wait, you cheated? I seen a video of a girl waking up a dude by punching him.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And say, you got your dick sucked today. You got your dick sucked today. Now, like, how dumb do you have to be to go get your dick sucked by another woman and then somehow make it to your other woman's house, fall asleep with your phone unlocked. Yeah, it's like, bro, it's like he. Animal bro needs to be put down. Like he can't even.

[Mike]

There was also that the, the thing about him like dming this only fans girl and trying to like flat fly her out and stuff like that.

[Pat]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. But that, but that's been the thing. I, I want to tell you something that's like very important and like. And I mean this and I, I hope he gets help and don't take this the wrong way. Yeah, that's a horny bro.

[Mike]

That's what I'm saying.

[Pat]

He is horny. Like, he's so horny, bro. Like you like, bro, you gotta be horny. When people. I've like heard reports that like this was already been investigated and you won the first investigation. So basically what in what I think of that as is Michigan knew what was going on.

[Mike]

Yep.

[Pat]

And they investigated it enough not to see if he was doing it because they knew he was doing the shit. That's why they investigated. And they wanted to save they ass and say we don't want this to come out when it like just. Let's say it comes out. We can at least say that we investigated it.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Because it looks good that they investigate it. If this happened right now and Michigan never investigated, Michigan would look way worse.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

So they did that to save their ass. They knew the whole time. The only reason that they reported on and fired him because it made it to public. The first one didn't make it to public. That's what they was investigating. How many people know?

[Mike]

And they actually got to fire him.

[Pat]

Exactly.

[Mike]

Because if they didn't fire him, then they would, I think. You know, when you do stuff like that, that's like conduct detrimental to, to the team or the, the, the whatever you work for.

[Friend]

Right.

[Pat]

Horny.

[Mike]

Yeah. Yeah. But so if they had fired him just with no like merit to firing him, they, you know, he could have been like, he could have still been owed the $6 million a year that he needed.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

But with them firing him and doing. And him all this stuff happening, they don't have to give him any money. So he really just blew. And the other thing is that there's temptation everywhere in the world. Right. But there's some things I feel like they should always take over that temptation. Especially when you have three kids. Three kids and a wife and you're making $6 million a year to coach football.

[Pat]

No, no, no.

[Mike]

That's like that's like how horny he had to be that that shit flew over his head.

[Pat]

There should be a report on every man or woman. I don't care who it is.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

If they didn't deal with men or women before, like, maybe they just weren't.

[HEF (rapper)]

No.

[Pat]

Good enough socially to get a boyfriend, a girlfriend, or whatever they prefer, and then they run into a heap of money. That person needs to be monitored for the first two years. Like, so you're telling me you just pat.

[Mike]

You create a whole bunch of jobs for people. But I'm just saying people giving people rides.

[Pat]

But I'm just saying this dude, this dude obviously never, never had this. The way he's operating is like, you've never had, like, a meaningful relationship. Everything that you got had to be because of your job and, like, what you do and like, who you are. And like, once you base yourself off that and you don't like, go out on dates or recognize yourself as, like, who you supposed to be, and then you get a bunch of money, you don't know who the you talking to. Yeah, not, you know, he. Sharon Moore probably found out, like his wife, you know, after two kids. Like, damn, you only wanted me for my money and my status.

[Mike]

That's the thing. That's the thing when you. When you're doing it with. With people that you're like, you're. You're above. Yeah. It kind of creates that power dynamic where it's like, is this person being forced to do this? I forgot there was rumors about her possibly being pregnant at one point too. I'm not sure.

[Pat]

That's. But that's crazy, bro. It's like. It's literally like. Like how you can never come back to that because you just showed like any man that would do that to a woman. It's just like you chasing her down. And then when she actually reports it, you go to her house and then do something violent, regardless if it was to herself or her or whatever happened. You broke in and then you scared that woman to death after you already damn near. Obviously there was some miscommunication if you telling her maybe to get rid of the kid and she's not. So it had to be some threats within there. It's like you doing all this and you never sat back like, damn, how can I keep my job? Okay, she's pregnant. How can I.

[Mike]

We don't know if she's pregnant, though.

[Pat]

Well, she was pregnant, maybe. Maybe whatever. If she was pregnant or that was a dispute at that point, you still never came to Your senses about how you can keep your job. Like, okay, I can walk out of this, probably get fired as Michigan's coach, probably have a baby, lose my wife and my kids. But it leaves one door open. I can scratch my way back to the surface and be a coach somewhere. You know what I'm saying? But this going to jail really fucked

[Mike]

up his chances of, like, being. Cause IME doka. He cheated. Right. He had an affair. He's still a head coach because he

[Pat]

never went to jail.

[Mike]

Yeah, exactly.

[Pat]

Or about to go to prison up

[Mike]

with the actual person you're cheating. Like Amy. Remember T.J. holmes and Amy Roch? They were ABC anchors who both had spouses.

[Pat]

Yep.

[Mike]

And they were together. They were having an affair. They got fired, I believe, or let go. And they actually just got married.

[Pat]

Yeah, I remember that.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

What's. What's the story about? Oh, that's Dale. Dale Curry.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

What's his mom's name? Monica.

[Mike]

No, I'm not sure.

[Pat]

Monique or something. I'm sorry. I'm butchering your name.

[Mike]

Who? Stephen Curry. Steph Curry's mom?

[Pat]

Yeah. Steph Curry's parents. I don't even want to butcher their name. You know what I mean?

[Mike]

I feel it. Steph Curry's parents. Sonia.

[Pat]

Sonia. What? I say Monica.

[Mike]

Yeah, it's close.

[Pat]

Monica and Sonia is very close.

[Mike]

Bro, that's kind of like the same vibe.

[Pat]

It's like the same vibe. You know what I'm saying?

[Mike]

But no, so.

[Pat]

No, I know, I know. Sonia and Del Curry, huh?

[Mike]

You said Sonya.

[Pat]

What is it?

[Mike]

I thought Sonia. Well, go ahead. My bad.

[Pat]

No, no, no. Look at this, dude, bro, how you gonna come to the rescue and they end up shooting a victim?

[Mike]

I do that all the time.

[Pat]

You're like, no, respect her. Respect her. And then you start disrespecting her, too. Like, hey, yo, we apologize for butchering your name. But they switch spouses.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah. Or was it spouses?

[Pat]

Or, like, so they were both going through a divorce.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And then she would start dating the guy, and then Dale start dating that guy's wife.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat]

So they switched spouses. Wife swap. That used to be a show.

[Mike]

That was a show, man.

[Pat]

It was literally about just, like, household chores and stuff like that.

[Mike]

But the dynamics between some of, like, the black families and, like, the. The white families, especially, like, the super country ones.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Was interesting. Especially the badass little white kids.

[Pat]

Yeah. The Dave Chappelle has a really good skit about it.

[Mike]

Which one?

[Pat]

Was that? Where he did, like. Where they did, like, House swaps. But he was the dad that swapped, and he swapped to, like, a very, very suburban white family.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And, like, he adopted this kid that. That thought he was gangster, and he made him not gangster and then end up, like, having sex with the wife at the end.

[Friend]

It was like.

[Pat]

Yeah. And my boy was too ahead of his time, let's say that. No, for real.

[HEF (rapper)]

Yo, what's going on, man?

[Mike]

What up?

[HEF (rapper)]

How y' all doing?

[Female Caller]

Pretty good.

[Mike]

Just. Just doing a little wellness check on our. On the audience today. How's life changing right now?

[Friend]

Word.

[HEF (rapper)]

Shout out to y', all, man. Shout out to y'.

[Friend]

All.

[Pat]

He asked you what you good?

[HEF (rapper)]

It's cutting out. It's cutting out. I know what y' all are saying. Y' all are cutting out.

[Pat]

It is how you like, Gotcha.

[Mike]

Gotcha. The revolver spinning. No, but how's life treating you right now?

[HEF (rapper)]

Say that again. Say it again. You breaking up.

[Mike]

How's life treating you right now?

[Pat]

You only want to have this problem today, bro.

[HEF (rapper)]

Man, life been rough. I lost all my hoes at the same time.

[Pat]

Oh, man. Yo, we not agreeing with him calling y' all hoes, but go ahead, bro.

[HEF (rapper)]

But I lost all my woman at the same time.

[Pat]

My woman king.

[Mike]

Just women that you're dating or just talking to?

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You want me to talk proper? No respect.

[Mike]

Were any of them, like, your actual girlfriend?

[HEF (rapper)]

One of them was. One of them was. Yeah.

[Mike]

Oh, man. How'd you lose your girlfriend? I guess.

[HEF (rapper)]

I don't know. It kind of just. It kind of. It started to fade, and so, like, that started to fade, and I was like, all right, but I'm gonna talk to somebody else. Then we're gonna, you know, do what it is. Ball up top. And I started talking to her, and then she said, would you lose your hoes? Why are you talking to me? I said, no, I'm just trying to talk to you. I'm trying to get to know you. And she said, nah, get off my line. You're moving funny. So I stopped talking to her. I go to the next one. I'm like, yo, what you been?

[Friend]

How you doing?

[HEF (rapper)]

She said, why are you talking to me so much now? She said the same thing. And I went down the line, and next thing you know, the line ended, and so now I'm here.

[Pat]

So you said every girl that you actually paid attention to, and you want it, didn't want you, but when you had them on the side, they was good.

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[HEF (rapper)]

And that's the problem with today.

[Pat]

No, no, no, no.

[HEF (rapper)]

We're Losing recipes?

[Pat]

No, no, no, no, no. I think you missing a few spices, bro. So, like, what? You don't look at this as, like, self reflection? Like, I feel like, okay, I'm just give you a. An example. If four people punch me in the face in one day, I'm gonna think like, damn, after the fourth one that. You know what I'm saying? So you went through all these girls. You never think like, damn, what am I doing wrong?

[Young Man 2]

Whoa.

[HEF (rapper)]

Okay, now, what if I told you I started cooking now as a self reflection? I'm trying to better me, so I started cooking.

[Pat]

Okay, I like that.

[HEF (rapper)]

You know what I'm saying? I'm saying. I'm saying you never did.

[Mike]

You never really officially broke up with your girl.

[HEF (rapper)]

Nah, it kind of just ended. I mean, before that, too. I was engaged and that. So now that's what. Yo, Pat about to say something crazy. Mike might say something, too. I was engaged, and it ended eight days before the wedding. So then this happened six months after.

[Pat]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. When people say it like that, like, okay, if I say I'm engaged and it ended, who you think I broke up with?

[HEF (rapper)]

No, yeah, no, I definitely got my ass broke up with. I'm not going at it like, I didn't.

[Pat]

No, we. She left you eight days before?

[HEF (rapper)]

Eight days before the wedding?

[Pat]

Was there an event? Did you get caught cheating or something? Was it something you specifically?

[HEF (rapper)]

I swear to God. I swear to God. She came home one day, she paid for her hair to do the wedding. We paid for the wedding. Everything was cool. Family had tickets, they was flying in. And she walked up to me and said, I don't know if I want to get married no more. I said, for what? She said, I don't know. Here's the ring. Gave me the ring, and I packed up my shit and I was gone. She owned two houses. She was making bread but happy.

[Pat]

Hey, you know what? Whatever you doing, keep doing it, brother. You need some time to heal, man. Sorry. Sorry, Lydia. Y' all got a demon on your hands. Ain't nothing we could do with this one. That's up. Eight days before.

[HEF (rapper)]

Eight days before. I swear to God.

[Mike]

How. How long were y' all dating before y' all got married?

[HEF (rapper)]

Oh, well, almost two minutes. Well, we didn't. Yeah, to two and a half. Two and a half years.

[Mike]

Wait, what?

[Pat]

Two weeks.

[HEF (rapper)]

Two and a half years. Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

[Friend]

We was dating.

[HEF (rapper)]

We're dating for two and a half years.

[Pat]

Did she ever give you. Did you ever get closure from that, did she ever give you explanation of why she left eight days before?

[HEF (rapper)]

Nah, nah, not at all. I made an album about it, and then she hit me up and told call me a. And then. And then that was it. I never. I never talked to her again. I never told her.

[Mike]

You made a song about it.

[HEF (rapper)]

I mean, I made an album about it. Yeah, I made an album.

[Pat]

That's how you.

[Mike]

What was the album called?

[HEF (rapper)]

It's called all besides being young.

[Friend]

Okay.

[Pat]

Is it about different stuff or is every song about her?

[HEF (rapper)]

It's about, like, the process of going through it. So, like, for me, that was a big moment where I had to reflect. So it was like I had a song about me being confused. I had a song about me, like, reminiscing and maybe I up in some ways, things like that.

[Pat]

Bro, please tell me you got a track called eight days. Come on, bro.

[HEF (rapper)]

I. I got one called before you go.

[Mike]

How does that one go? How does that one go? Just give us. Give it acapella.

[Pat]

Acapella.

[HEF (rapper)]

Before you go. Please just know I tried. I tried. And before you go. She like that.

[Pat]

Oh, that ain't tough. That ain't tough, bro. It sound good. I don't know like what the beat is. The beat can change thing, but I. I would cop that, bro. Especially knowing as a true story. You should put your story out there.

[HEF (rapper)]

Hey, man, if I can plug myself, that'd be cool. I'm not trying to shout out whatever.

[Pat]

Whatever the that mean, brother, you do it.

[HEF (rapper)]

Hey, hey My, my, my, my is young. HEF Y u n G H E F the album came out, it's 11 songs, 30 minutes long, if you want to check it out. Rapping, singing on there, all that, so. And I got actual voice memos from her on there. I got actual voice memo. She didn't like that.

[Pat]

I'm telling you. I guarantee you at least a plays guaranteed off this right here.

[Mike]

Do you have one of the voice memos?

[Pat]

That's just not illegal.

[HEF (rapper)]

I can. I can play it right here. I could play it.

[Pat]

That sound illegal as hell.

[Mike]

He has the. It's on his album. It's out already. Go ahead, just play.

[HEF (rapper)]

I can play it right now.

[Mike]

Just play. Just play it.

[HEF (rapper)]

Let me know if y' all can hear this. There it is.

[Mike]

No, we can't really hear, but it's all right, bro.

[HEF (rapper)]

I'm telling you, I'm trying, I'm trying.

[Pat]

No, no, no, you're good, bro. That sound good, bro. I'm telling you, bro. Matter of fact, can we sign this before he goes, just so we can get some of our back. Before you go. Let it go. I can't believe.

[HEF (rapper)]

Let it go.

[Pat]

Let. It was eight days and you was.

[HEF (rapper)]

I had a song. I said. I said. I said. Sometimes I said, like, I changed it to, like nine days to make it flow. I said, if we was nine days out, why'd you even let me in? Select that. Like, I put it on the nose. I put it on the nose with it. You know what I'm saying? I said exactly how it was. I wasn't fluffing or nothing.

[Pat]

No, that's. Hey, that's some real, man.

[Mike]

I feel it.

[HEF (rapper)]

I wasn't making set up.

[Mike]

What's your message to your ex?

[HEF (rapper)]

To my ex? You a dirty. I'm petty as. I don't. I don't wish you the best. I wish you the worst. I hope your dog die.

[Pat]

Okay, last question. Is there a song that you got, like, that's more angry towards her, that's on the album, or is that just. The only one you talk about is before you go because you say all about her.

[HEF (rapper)]

But I had one. I had one song because, like, her homegirl had lived in the house with us. She was renting out a room, and they. They started going out all the time when I was packing up my. So I had a song about her and her homegirl called Entertain Me. And I said how I want her to, like, go out and, like, she can dance with her friend, and I'm gonna run it up instead.

[Pat]

Nice. You got any bars or you don't remember the song?

[HEF (rapper)]

I said? I said last girl was too ugly. Kill me, try to give the world watch me run it out with you While dancing with her girl. Whoa, whoa. She like that. It's like a little pop song.

[Pat]

It's a pop song. Ain't got one.

[Mike]

Double entendre.

[Pat]

That notebook.

[HEF (rapper)]

Oh, you want that?

[Pat]

I mean, it's a pop album.

[HEF (rapper)]

I'm making pop songs.

[Pat]

I'm sure it's good, bro. I'm still gonna rock with it. I just like. I'm trying to figure out what type of artist you are. Just slowly. This is my process, bro.

[HEF (rapper)]

I had a. I had a song.

[Friend]

Hold on.

[HEF (rapper)]

You want to bar? I said there was something about them blue eyes couldn't see the new lines drew them in the sand hard times came and blew by what you really want? Intent thought you knew my wish you held it down but I'm looking for a new vibe thought we needed prayer feel the silence with the air I was trying to fill a space while you're pulling out your hair like.

[Friend]

Like that.

[HEF (rapper)]

Like I had a song like that.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

All right, bro.

[Pat]

Still not one bar found, brother. No, I'm just playing. It's tough, though. Can you send us a link, though, so I can actually check it out, though?

[HEF (rapper)]

Yeah, I'll send you a link. You probably not gonna listen to it. I know you. You a. You might not listen.

[Pat]

I'm the main one that would probably listen to it.

[HEF (rapper)]

You.

[Pat]

You lonely ass. I'm an audio listener, too.

[Mike]

I'm audio.

[Friend]

There.

[Pat]

Lonely boy.

[Female Caller 2]

Hey.

[Mike]

Hi.

[Female Caller 2]

How are you?

[Pat]

Good, good, good, good, good, good.

[Mike]

Well, Pat's here, too. Ng.

[Female Caller 2]

Oh, hey, Pat. How are you?

[Pat]

Good, good. How are you?

[Female Caller 2]

Good, good. Can't complain.

[Mike]

All right, we got.

[Female Caller 2]

Actually.

[Pat]

Well, no, go ahead, wait. Oh, go ahead. Go complaining.

[Female Caller 2]

Well, you know, I have a lot of things to complain, but I guess that would be into the story.

[Mike]

Okay. So the question is, how's life treating you right now?

[Female Caller 2]

Life is treating me like a bitch. Listen, this is why I say I have a lot of things to complain about. I need me a provider asap.

[Pat]

Like, cable provider?

[Female Caller 2]

Nah, I need a man. I need a man to fully provide for me. I can't do this life. It's hard out here.

[Mike]

What is. What is this life currently, then?

[Female Caller 2]

Well, I live by myself. You know, I. I've been living by myself for, like, two years prior, I was in a relationship, and I guess I didn't know how hard it was out here.

[Pat]

Oh, so you sent the guy that your ex was paying a lot of the bills when you were together?

[Female Caller]

All of it.

[Mike]

Why'd y' all break up?

[Female Caller 2]

Well, we broke up for a lot of reasons. I feel like. So we got together early on, like. Like our early. Like, 20s. And. And now I'm just over here, like. Okay, well, we just realized we are not compatible in a lot of things. Like, yeah, we were able to live and deal with each other, but I guess me and him had, like, different perspective of life.

[Pat]

So what was the prospectus?

[Female Caller 2]

I mean. Well, see, when we first got. I'm so sorry.

[Mike]

What is that beeping in the background?

[Female Caller 2]

I'm in my balcony and someone is trying to, like, lift this shit up.

[Pat]

You better be.

[Female Caller 2]

I'm so sorry.

[Pat]

Probably jump.

[Friend]

No,

[Pat]

That's what I'm saying. It might be your only choice. No, but what were the different perspectives? Like, you know, what was his outlook on life? What was yours?

[Mike]

Just one. One example.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Female Caller 2]

Yeah. I mean, okay, so for. So when we first got together, I was still trying to like outside early times, like literally when I was just turning 21. So I'm out here trying to go out, drink, party with friends. He was, he would be like also obviously included with me, like to go out and stuff, but he didn't want to do any of that. He wasn't like a drinker a part, like he wasn't a party person. He was ready to just settle down. And I was like, I understand that. But I was like, we're just turning 21.

[Female Caller]

Like,

[Pat]

you know, like, I mean, that's good, that's good, that's good. You got out of something that you know, you want to go different path. That's, that's good. So do you miss him? Do you wish you could have him back? You wish to go back to that lifestyle?

[Female Caller 2]

I wish I could have him pay my bills back.

[Pat]

So what's stopping that?

[Mike]

Like, what's the dating life for you now then?

[Female Caller 2]

It's horrible. So I moved to the south two years ago.

[Friend]

So.

[Female Caller 2]

Okay, real quick. But like prior to that, like the two years ago before we split up, we moved together down south and then I left three months later.

[Mike]

Okay, so why is dating bad?

[Female Caller 2]

And dating here in this city has been the worst. I tried multiple apps. I've tried even going to cafes. I try to go into like, say I'm very like a social butterfly person. So I'll say hi to anyone and start conversation if they come up to me too. Like I'm very open minded. Like I try to talk and go on these first dates, but they, it's been exhausting and no one has been like matching energy or like they're trying to do this 5050 shit.

[Pat]

You don't, but like you don't, but you don't, but they're trying to. But you. Is this what you base dating on is if they can be a provider or not?

[Female Caller 2]

Well, one of them, like one of my checklist clearest voice.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

You give it all the Red Pool, all those Red Bull podcast.

[Female Caller 2]

Like it's one of my, like. Yes, because it's like I grew up that way. So like. Yeah, I mean I, I just feel like you're not a man if you can't fully provide.

[Mike]

How do you know that within the first, like in the dating phase of things?

[Female Caller 2]

Well, because my pr. Okay, so like prior the dates I had, I mean I never had problems like that. Like I just always said up front, I'm like, I'm looking for someone who's fully able to provide.

[Young Man]

Do they.

[Pat]

Wait, wait, wait, so one the ones that go bad. Why do they go bad? Are they lying to you? Are they not interested in you? That's what we're trying to get at. Why isn't it.

[Female Caller 2]

Okay, so, I mean, so like I said, parieting is like one of the stuff in the checklist, so. Yes, I mean, the ones that go bad, I mean, that aspect they do provide, like when go days or whatever we're going out or even further months later on. They still always fully provide, but we just didn't match either because of like them wanting kids or you know, like religion. I'm just like, oh, okay.

[Pat]

They were paying for everything and they wanted what they wanted. No, but seems pretty crazy to me, right?

[Mike]

Yeah, they want to.

[Friend]

You

[Pat]

want you to have his religion because he's paying all the bills.

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Female Caller 2]

What? No, that's crazy. So I was supposed to change my religion?

[Friend]

No, no, no.

[Mike]

But it's just like the compromises, it feel like you're not willing to make any compromises for the things that they might want.

[Pat]

Also feel like there's men that you could find that you actually match their energy and you guys are perfect for each other. And it might start off as 5050, and then eventually that man will become your provider because he loves you so much and he knows that's what you've always wanted. So I think that's probably the route you should take. Not starting at the provider part, because provider first conversation.

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Crazy.

[Female Caller 2]

That's how you just let them believe that I'm always gonna be 50 and I'm not. Like. Like, I got your back later on for sure. Like, of course.

[Pat]

No, I got. I got your back.

[Female Caller 2]

Wait, you know, I'm your supporter.

[Pat]

Trying to convince. Trying to convince somebody that you got their back with a valley voice. Like, that is so crazy. I got your back.

[Mike]

I'm about to sound so red pilly. What? What are you providing?

[Pat]

Oh, my God. Why you do that?

[Mike]

I'm just saying. What are you bringing to the table?

[Pat]

No, Mike, no. Come back to the side.

[Mike]

I've done it.

[Female Caller 2]

That's crazy.

[Pat]

My brother in pills.

[Mike]

In a serious sense though, like, obviously provider, because usually in relationship, when somebody's like, the provider is like another person is contributing to the relationship in another way. That might not be money,

[Female Caller 2]

right? Okay, so yeah, if it's not money, like me, like if we were in a relationship long term already, like if we're living together, stuff like that. Like, yes, I still be wanting to work and all that, but I will still come home and Like. Like, you know, do, like, just cleaning, cooking, just doing everything in the household. And just making sure he's good, too.

[Pat]

Even, like, making sure he's good.

[Female Caller]

Yeah, yeah, of course.

[Pat]

Oh, okay. So what. So where do you draw the line at? I guess is the question. The last question we're gonna ask you.

[Female Caller 2]

Like, if money comes out of my pocket, that's where I draw the line.

[Pat]

But you said you. But you said there were other providers and they provided for you, but you didn't match at something. There was something. What?

[Female Caller]

Oh,

[Female Caller 2]

like kids.

[Female Caller]

Kids.

[Female Caller 2]

I don't want kids.

[Pat]

Okay, kids. Okay, let's knock that off. Ain't gotta explain that. It's your choice. Go ahead.

[Female Caller 2]

Right, okay.

[Pat]

What's the next one?

[Female Caller 2]

Religion.

[Pat]

Okay, religion. What's the next one?

[Female Caller 2]

I think that's where I draw the line. Maybe. Probably.

[Pat]

So no kids? No kids.

[Mike]

No God.

[Pat]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[Female Caller]

I believe in God.

[Pat]

Like, that's crazy. This girl want to be the Adams family. No, son.

[Mike]

What the.

[Pat]

Chill, chill. All right.

[Mike]

You have a good one.

[Female Caller]

Thank.

[Pat]

No, she lost. Yodi. Oh, my goodness.

[Friend]

Damn.

[Pat]

Yo, what's the deal?

[Young Man 2]

Chilling. Just got off of work. Doordashing right now.

[Pat]

Doordashing. Making that money.

[Mike]

Wait, wait, what was the voice at the beginning?

[Young Man 2]

Yo, I'm geeked right now. I got Mike and Pat on the phone. I've been low key. I thought I've been responding, but it's only been one of them hoes. I don't know how they not be going through.

[Pat]

All right, okay.

[Young Man 2]

Holy.

[Mike]

Welcome to Craft Stories Podcast, man. I appreciate your support, bro.

[Young Man 2]

Bro. Okay, yeah, I'm glazing. I'm glazing. I'm glazing.

[Mike]

Support, bro.

[Pat]

No, it is glazing. I got a question for you, bro. For sure, for sure, for sure. Who or what is your biggest op?

[Young Man 2]

Well, it's hippie me. I found some recent texts where I was. I was. I was just shooting my own self.

[Mike]

Explain.

[Young Man 2]

Okay, okay, okay. So recently I found some text messages from Now I say baddies, but it was high school sweetheart, where she was venting to me, and I was literally like, oh, no, no, make war. Not. No, fuck not make war. That peace make love, not war. And she was just venting me, and I feel like, oh, I'm fumbling on the car right now.

[Mike]

Or you're just being a good friend.

[Young Man 2]

I am, I am, I am. What's the call? We were on that, like, on and off shit. Like, ah, she would get a boyfriend. I had one girlfriend throughout the whole high school so like, I was. I was that one friend that I kept being. I kept having like, feelings for her and she would just come back to me after she wouldn't break up with him.

[Pat]

So you just. You're just like kind of praying and hoping that she would finally choose you, huh?

[Young Man 2]

Honestly? And now she getting married in the summer.

[Co-worker]

What?

[Young Man 2]

Happy? No, I am. No, no, Hate shit. I am hoping it fails you.

[Pat]

Are you heartbroken over this?

[Young Man 2]

When I found them text. For sure. For sure. Thought I was over it. Definitely. Definitely heartbroken.

[Female Caller 2]

So.

[Pat]

No, wait, wait. So you looked up the text after you found out she was getting married?

[Young Man 2]

What's called. I thought she blocked me.

[Pat]

Why would you think that?

[Young Man 2]

I lowkey could not find them hoes. It was honestly her. What's it called? It was the number underneath, like the text. So it wasn't even her name.

[Mike]

And you haven't been.

[Young Man 2]

I'm pretty sure I still.

[Mike]

You haven't been in any other relationships since then?

[Young Man 2]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Friend]

So what's like sound like a. Oh.

[Mike]

What's been up with the relationships you've been in?

[Young Man 2]

They've been. They've been chill on and off. I'm still in college, so it's like. It's nothing permanent right now.

[Pat]

She getting married already? How old was she?

[Young Man 2]

She's a year younger than me, so at 21, she's getting married religious. So. Yeah, to no hate to the pawn colored people, but to a white man.

[Pat]

Yo, it's so sad, bro. Oh, no, you're funny, dude. I mean, like, I don't. Were you ready to get married at 21?

[Young Man 2]

What's it called to her? Yes.

[Pat]

You would have proposed to her?

[Young Man 2]

I copied when I was 20. Eventually, yes, for sure.

[Pat]

What do you mean eventually? It sounded like she was ready to get married right away. It sounded like she kind of like. Not to say like she levels above you, but I'm just saying, like, levels above you as far as like relationship, like where she wants to be in a relationship.

[Young Man 2]

For sure. Yeah. Maybe I wasn't putting enough in because the way.

[Pat]

The way you talking like, you don't sound like you anywhere near close to marriage.

[Young Man 2]

Hell no. I'm literally door dashing afterwards.

[Mike]

And that's okay. Yeah, you're still young.

[Pat]

You were young as hell. I'm just saying it sound like y' all just on a different timeline. Like who she's. I don't think she was for you, bro.

[Young Man 2]

Nah, nah, I do. I do. Gotta internalize that. Like we weren't meant to be together. No.

[Mike]

Really? Internalize that.

[Pat]

No, push that. But I got to put that and,

[Mike]

like, read it every day.

[Pat]

Like, tattoo that on your face.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah. Like, they make that your mantra because you shouldn't be hating on her being married. Crazy.

[Young Man 2]

No. Oh, no. Tattoo is crazy because I was going to tattoo her name on me.

[Pat]

Okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Young Man 2]

On some, like, ah, we getting matching tattoos type. I don't think I ever.

[Mike]

Okay, so what. What's different about her than, like, the other girls you've met?

[Young Man 2]

For one, most of them have been men.

[Mike]

What was the question?

[Young Man 2]

What was the question?

[Mike]

I said, what. What's different about the girl that he's in love with versus the girls that he's been with?

[Pat]

Oh, okay.

[Mike]

But he said most of them have been men. Oh, okay. Okay.

[Friend]

That's good. Go ahead.

[Young Man 2]

What was it called? Did find out? Like, not find out. I just. I don't. I think I told her once and she was rocking with it, but, like, I am bisexual and shit. But yeah, it has been a lot more. I feel like we never had any adult conversations, but she's like, okay, but

[Pat]

she's super religious and you're bisexual. Is that. Was that the difference?

[Young Man 2]

Like, she. She. She did not like that at one point. She eventually came around to it, but then that was also shortly after she cut me off.

[Pat]

Right.

[Young Man 2]

So she did ghost me.

[Pat]

Yes. Okay. She never came around to it.

[Young Man 2]

Yeah, pretty much.

[Pat]

You thought she did. Yeah, she does. Not for you, bro.

[Mike]

Yeah. So find the girl or guy.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

That. That you rock with.

[Young Man 2]

I do.

[Mike]

Like, what's the dating scene for you with, like, with the men then?

[Young Man 2]

I'm in a small town in Texas, bro. It's a bunch of old men and, like, people who don't. Who don't rock with, like. I'm mostly on, like, dating sites and I don't really go out. I mostly just work and be at home, take care of my niece.

[Mike]

Bro, you got hella options. You know that, right?

[Pat]

Man, that's crazy.

[Mike]

That is hella.

[Young Man 2]

I do. I do.

[Mike]

Bisexual. You got hella options.

[Pat]

He still gotta. He's still gotta look for young. He still gotta look for his person, though.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I'm saying?

[Mike]

But it's hella options, though.

[Young Man 2]

I do. Or do.

[Pat]

I'm trying to say you for everybody.

[Mike]

No, don't say that. No, no, no, no. There's a whole letter for that in the thing.

[Pat]

He said you letting everybody.

[Mike]

That's what he said. I mean, technically, everybody.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Like, every type of person.

[Female Caller]

Person.

[Pat]

Hey, did you say every time.

[Young Man 2]

I don't discriminate.

[Mike]

Yeah, see?

[Pat]

Oh, you say every time.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You got hella options.

[Young Man 2]

I do. I do.

[Mike]

Hey, man, you're gonna find the one for you, brother.

[Young Man 2]

I got. I got to. I got to. I'm not ready to settle down now, but I do gotta find the one.

[Mike]

Are you still young? You don't have to settle down.

[Pat]

No, you're good, bro.

[Young Man 2]

That's true. That's true. That's true. Appreciate it.

[Mike]

All right, brother. You have a good one, though.

[Young Man 2]

Y', all, too.

[HEF (rapper)]

Love y'.

[Co-worker]

All.

[Mike]

Peace.

[Pat]

You didn't want to say love you back. Now you weird.

[Female Caller]

Hey, guys.

[Mike]

How's it going?

[Pat]

What it do?

[Female Caller]

Excuse my voice. I am sick.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Pat]

What you got?

[Female Caller]

I don't know.

[Mike]

Oh, my, like, back cough.

[Female Caller]

I don't. I had a procedure yesterday, and it made me sick.

[Pat]

What you had done.

[Female Caller]

Don't laugh. I had a colonoscopy.

[Pat]

That's health as well.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, laugh at that.

[Female Caller]

I mean, I'm young, so that's what I was like, you know?

[Pat]

No, no, it's cool.

[Female Caller]

Just don't.

[Pat]

Why? Why make your voice raspy?

[Female Caller]

Because, I don't know. If you take the prep, it makes you sick. Like, it gives you severe chills and a sore throat. I did not know that.

[Pat]

Amen.

[Mike]

We.

[Pat]

We all eventually got to go through it. So you just spread information. We got a question for you.

[Female Caller]

Of course.

[Pat]

Who or what is your biggest op?

[Female Caller]

My cousin Jamil.

[Pat]

Name drop. We love it.

[Female Caller]

Wait, Jamil,

[Pat]

You got an edit point?

[Mike]

Okay, go ahead.

[Pat]

Okay, okay, okay. Keep going, Keep going.

[Female Caller]

I don't like that. So he's always been a bum. Like, he's never kept a job, mind you. He's 35, no teeth. He has one tooth. He's never kept a job. In every job he's had, our grandmother, she gave him money for the job, you know, to get the uniforms on boarding, bought bus cards and everything. He owes her. He owed her a great amount. I don't know the amount, but I know it hurt her feelings because she thought she was getting that money back. I don't know why she thought that, but she thought she was getting that money back. It hurt her feelings. So much so that I reached out to him and I was like, hey, you flexing on the grammar, but where's Grandma's money?

[Pat]

What was he flexing on the ground that made you swipe up and say, he got grandma money?

[Female Caller]

Cars, clothes, money.

[Pat]

Oh, damn. The actual money. That'll do it.

[Female Caller]

The money. That's the money that she's supposed to get, right? So I was like, I was like, yo, when you gonna pay grandma? He told. He cursed me out. So bank,

[Mike]

what'd he call you?

[Female Caller]

He called me a bald head. Mind you, I don't speak on nobody kids. But he does have children. And my sister is the type. She was, she was talking about the kids, I was talking about him. So I'm bald headed, however, you know what I'm saying.

[Pat]

No, no, no, no, no, no,

[Friend]

no.

[Pat]

Lead the kids out of this. Anywho, okay. What's your message to him?

[Mike]

Yeah,

[Female Caller]

pay grandma her money, you bum ass nigga. Also, I'm sorry. He threatened to kill her. He said, I will do a drive by by your grandma house or it's gonna be like some slow singing and flower bringing around grandma house, something like that. Right.

[Mike]

Mind you, is he a person capable?

[Female Caller]

He beat women for a year, so he's capable of anything.

[Pat]

I suggest you lay low until we figure this out. We got to get him off the streets first.

[Female Caller]

I live in the state of North Carolina. He lives in the state of New Jersey. Gun laws are very different. It's a very different. You know what I'm trying to say. I don't need to lay low. Thank you. But yeah, the message money or he gonna have to deal with me. No, he's gonna have to deal with me if he don't give grandma her. Her bread. Now, this was a couple years ago, but I'm still pissed.

[Mike]

How much time you got?

[Female Caller]

I don't know. But mind you, he's from New Jersey. We're all from New Jersey. I just moved to North Carolina. But he gonna tell me I'm not safe in the streets of New Jersey. Mind you, I go back every year, always been safe and untouched and he's nowhere to be found. I need that.

[Pat]

What do you need from him? You just want the money and you done?

[Female Caller]

If he has the money in an apology, I will take that. But if we gotta fight, then we gotta fight.

[Pat]

Like fight like knuckle up like you think you could take him in a fight? Yes, I believe in you.

[Mike]

More power.

[Pat]

More power too.

[Female Caller]

I think I could definitely. I could take him. And before y' all hang up on me like y' all did last time

[Mike]

we hung up on you.

[Pat]

We can't tell she got a different voice.

[Female Caller]

Yes, it was me. I was talking about the. It was me. I was talking about the relationship dilemma thing with my boyfriend and things like that. I have a completely different voice.

[Co-worker]

Huh.

[Pat]

What like specifically happened with your boyfriend. That would help us remember while you were on.

[Female Caller]

Oh. I was talking about how women get more in a relationship. Nothing.

[Pat]

Okay. Yeah, yeah, I remember that.

[Mike]

Yeah, that was. Yeah, we just.

[Pat]

It was just.

[Mike]

End of the call, that's all.

[Pat]

Probably got a little. Go ahead.

[Female Caller]

You hung up on me. But before y' all do, since I got my. My beef out, and hopefully he hear this shout out to, when are y' all doing a live show in North Carolina? Because I wanted to get this tickets for my sister because her birthday's on

[Friend]

the 4th next year.

[Mike]

But first quarter.

[Pat]

Yeah, first quarter. Like February, March or something.

[Co-worker]

That.

[Pat]

When you done handling that beef, that's when we come to North Carolina. Don't bring that.

[Female Caller]

No, I'm not. I'm not gonna bring it. I just need to know when y' all are gonna be here so I could get her.

[Mike]

No, we're gonna. We're planning everything now. It's gonna be very soon. We're just trying to get the venues and stuff situated.

[Pat]

I would say, like, March, March, April. Charlotte is like, third or fourth on our list. We got. We definitely want LA next, and then we'll decide with that third one. It's probably up. Up between y', all, between Houston and Charlotte, but in Dallas, like, we gotta see. But y' all definitely on the list.

[Female Caller]

Did you used to live down here? Definitely. Move those dates up.

[Pat]

No, I got you. Okay. I got you. Charlotte. The Charlotte people talking, they said. They said we should do it at a venue. I forgot the venue name, but they said it's, like, a perfect venue to do it at down there, so we definitely got.

[Female Caller]

Well, I live in Greensboro. I don't live in Charlotte, so I wouldn't be able to tell you which venue, but whichever venue we gonna be there.

[Pat]

Okay. Slide down, man. Let's make it happen.

[Female Caller 2]

All right.

[Mike]

Appreciate it.

[Female Caller]

It was a pleasure speaking with y'. All. No worries. Y' all have a great day.

[Mike]

You, too. Welcome to Crash on Me's podcast, man.

[Friend]

What up, what up, what up, what

[Pat]

up, what up, what up? I got a question for you, bro.

[Friend]

What you got?

[Pat]

Who or what is your biggest op, bro?

[Friend]

My little sneaky link from a couple years ago. This. This. I'm sorry. This young lady decided to bite her nails and leave them in my car so my. So my girl can find him.

[Mike]

You think she did that on purpose?

[Friend]

Yeah, think so.

[Pat]

Like, we was, like, how big was. We had an agreement. Are these, like, stub nails or like, long. Long ass?

[Friend]

They were like, the little. Not too long, but you know, medium length. I don't even know how she been through that.

[Mike]

But you said. What was your agreement?

[Friend]

We had an agreement because she had a boyfriend, I had a girlfriend, and we were just gonna always keep it solid, you know?

[Pat]

But they broke up, so I think

[Friend]

she did that on purpose. So we can.

[Mike]

Wait. What happened? What happened?

[Friend]

Get together? I said they broke up, so I think she did that so we can get together.

[Pat]

She wanted you to break up with yours, too?

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Pat]

So she got caught cheating. Is that how her.

[Friend]

I don't know what they got into it for.

[Pat]

So you don't even know how hers ended?

[Friend]

No.

[Pat]

And she just wanted to just come to you, so she probably. So how do you. Did she end hers herself?

[Friend]

I don't know. I wasn't that involved in a relationship. Okay.

[Pat]

You don't ask my questions.

[Mike]

Are you still are you? Did that make you break up with your girl or your girl break up with you?

[Friend]

Yeah, she broke up with me. And I sent her the picture. I was like, why? You left the nails in my car? And then she won't say, my bad. I can make it up to you. I'm like, I don't want to talk

[Pat]

about that right now.

[Friend]

I'm stressed out.

[Mike]

Something.

[Pat]

I just lost the love of my life.

[Mike]

So why didn't you.

[Friend]

Right?

[Mike]

So why didn't you want to be a sneaky with the sneaky link?

[Pat]

So she had good.

[Friend]

I'm sorry.

[Mike]

So why.

[Friend]

I can't be saying all that.

[Mike]

Why didn't you want to be with her, though? Like, relationship wise, like, public, like, how your main girl was.

[Friend]

Oh, because she a cheater,

[Pat]

man. Brother, you lost.

[Mike]

They're gonna be mad about smiling at this, too.

[Pat]

We just lost as a community, man.

[Friend]

Well, I don't think so.

[Mike]

You deserve to be broken up with. Right? You agree?

[Friend]

Yeah, I did deserve it, but I was doing everything I possible to keep

[Pat]

it a secret, you know, type, man, you. I mean, you just a good dude.

[Young Man 2]

Huh?

[Friend]

I thought y' all hung up.

[Pat]

No, it should have. No, we didn't know. It just went. It just went silent. What question we asked.

[Mike]

I was just saying if he's just a good dude or not.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah?

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You a snake or what, bro?

[Friend]

Am I a snake? Nah, I don't think so.

[Mike]

So going into this next relationship that you might get into, right?

[Pat]

Are you.

[Mike]

Is this cheating over with. You're done cheating.

[Friend]

Oh, yeah, yeah. That. That was the young me. I'm married with a kid now, bro.

[Pat]

Oh, man, I hate you. What you think it's a Disney movie or some. We don't hear no good endings.

[Mike]

Does your wife know about your past?

[Friend]

She knows some bits and pieces. I ain't going to detail with everything. Can't do that.

[Pat]

The past is the past, huh?

[Friend]

Yeah. Leave that in the past.

[Mike]

And you have no other contact with this sneaky link, right?

[Pat]

No, no, no. I guess the biggest. I ain't gonna lie.

[Friend]

When. When we. When. When. When she. When I sent her that picture and she told me she gonna make it up to me. I did spin the block. I needed that closure.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Friend]

Okay.

[Pat]

Well, that's. That's the old you, though. Are you a faithful man now? Is a bigger question.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Friend]

I don't play with my vows, bro.

[Pat]

Put.

[Mike]

Let's.

[Pat]

Hey, man.

[Mike]

Hey.

[Pat]

The blessings, man. Hey. Life lessons for sure. Sure, man.

[Mike]

The up part is that this, like, what our podcast gets clipped up, right? And the only thing people are going to hear is your first part and they're just gonna call you an. And a shitty person. So I apologize. Apologies in advance, brother.

[Friend]

But I'm glad it's all good.

[Mike]

I'm glad you on the. On the straight and narrow.

[Friend]

Nah, it's all good. And I'm a Patreon listener. I was just listening to y' all last Patreon exclusive, so you with it. I know what's up. Yeah. Yeah, I do. I don't like that small ass couch I'll be on, though. I need to get something a little bigger than that.

[Mike]

That's our LA studio. We gotta. We gotta get some bigger.

[Friend]

I know.

[Pat]

We gotta get some. We got to get some chairs there. We gonna talk to them now.

[Friend]

All right, bet.

[Pat]

All right.

[Mike]

Appreciate you, bro. Peace.

[Friend]

And y' all should do like Sonic and. And Knuckles in the background.

[Pat]

Oh, that's fire. That's fire. We with it.

[Mike]

We try suggestions before I hang up on you.

[Friend]

No, I ain't got nothing else, Mike. All right,

[Pat]

You know what? Somebody serious. Somebody serious when they name drop up like. All right, Mike.

[Young Man 2]

Yeah.

[Co-worker]

Hello?

[Mike]

Yo,

[Pat]

what's up?

[Mike]

What up? What up? Why you laughing?

[Pat]

I tell you after. Yo, what's the deal? It's all something totally different, bro. Don't. No main character syndrome over here. I literally just found out she was on the phone. All right, question for you.

[Young Man]

Okay, go ahead.

[Pat]

My bad, bro. That was hostile. Who or what is your biggest odd.

[Friend]

Stop.

[Co-worker]

Timothy Shalamet can't stand his ass.

[Pat]

All right. Go off.

[Co-worker]

Well, because like, he. He's the same person in every single movie, and yet him and all his little fans Say that he's better than everyone else. Like, even Leo. Like, come on, man.

[Pat]

What? Okay, why, like, why is this driving you crazy? Where does. Where does the hate root from? Where did it start?

[Co-worker]

Because I've seen him in a fir, like his first few movies.

[Young Man]

What is it?

[Co-worker]

Ladybird and I don't know what other one. That's the only memorable one, but it wasn't doing he. I'd never seen that.

[Young Man 2]

It looks boring.

[Co-worker]

I'm sorry.

[Pat]

Doing this pretty good. I'm not gonna lie, bro.

[Mike]

But go ahead.

[Co-worker]

But, yeah, like, it just feels like he's giving off. Like, he's just. He doesn't even, like, make a Persona. It's just him walking in front of the camera, just talking. Like if it's a regular Tuesday.

[Pat]

Oh, you got. You gotta watch Doom, bro. He really get down and doing.

[Mike]

So you're not with the. The new Marty supreme promos?

[Co-worker]

No, I'm not. Why am I gonna watch a movie about ping pong? Ping pong players.

[Pat]

What kind of movies you into?

[Co-worker]

I mean, not ping pong,

[Pat]

Like, what you into, bro. Who your favorite? Like, what's your favorite. Your favorite movie, who your favorite actor? Like, what in comparison are we comparing Timothy to?

[Co-worker]

I mean, you gotta. You gotta agree with me. Cynthia, Revo and Wicked. Like, come on now.

[Pat]

I haven't seen Wicked yet, but you're comparing it? Like, I feel like it's not a fair comparison. It's two totally different. It's an actress, actor, different style of movies. Who else?

[Co-worker]

Okay, Robert Downey Jr. And Oppenheimer. I thought that was great.

[Pat]

Comparing him to Robert Downey Jr. Is crazy.

[Mike]

I don't think you're telling the truth.

[Co-worker]

He himself is already doing that.

[Pat]

There's a. There's something else that he's hating on.

[Mike]

There's something else that he did that's affects you personally that. That you hate. I don't know what it is.

[Pat]

Do you like the Kardashians?

[Co-worker]

Well, I like him.

[Mike]

You don't like Kylie?

[Co-worker]

I mean, Kylie's all right, but she's no Kim. Kim walked so Kylie could run.

[Pat]

We getting closer. We gotta figure this out. I did he, like. Is there a movie that you watched him in in full and you just really hate it?

[Co-worker]

See, that's what I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think of what other movie. Oh, actually, you know what? Yeah, what's that one movie? It's like a biopic of another singer. A complete unknown. Was boring. I couldn't finish it. I had to stop it halfway Through.

[Pat]

All right, what's your. What's your final message to him, Timothy?

[Co-worker]

Shut up, man. Like, stop saying that. You're like the next Coming to Jesus or something, and just, you know, if you're doing good, let the fans and your movies talk. Don't say anything else. Just shut up. You're losing the award for yourself.

[Pat]

What about. And they call him. Did he get white boy of a year or something?

[Mike]

That's what he got.

[Friend]

What?

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah, I think so. He got, like, white boy a year or something.

[Co-worker]

I don't even know what that means.

[Mike]

Are yours, like, friends, like, overhyping them to you or something like that?

[Co-worker]

No, actually, there's. My co worker overhyped some, and I'm like, you need to calm down. Like, it's not all that got.

[Pat]

Hey, hey, man.

[Mike]

It's your opinion, man. I can't even be mad at it.

[Pat]

Yeah, we can't. We can't even get mad at it. It sound like you got more knowledge than us about the situation.

[Co-worker]

I mean, I don't know if that's a. I don't know if that's a backhanded compliment or not, but I'mma take it. Thank you.

[Friend]

Okay.

[Mike]

All right, bro. You're go up, man.

[Co-worker]

You 2 Love the pod, man.

[Pat]

Appreciate you, bro.

[Mike]

Thank you, bro.

[Young Man]

What up? What up? Yo, I was popping.

[Pat]

What's cracking, Brody?

[Young Man]

Nothing here.

[Female Caller]

Just chilling.

[Young Man]

You know how it is. How y' all doing?

[Pat]

Welcome to Crashing Me's podcast.

[Young Man]

Thank you. Thank you. It's a pleasure, man. Thank you.

[Pat]

A pleasure. All right. Who or what is your biggest op?

[Young Man]

Man, I gotta say, my pocket watching as homie, bro, like, mind you, bro, I make a. I make a decent amount of money, right? And I got a homie who's always asking for a bug and always, bro, when we go eat, he'd be like, I know you got money, bro. Can you give me a piece of food? Right? And I don't mind, bro. I don't mind at all. You know what I'm saying? I feed the homies. But when you ask me every day

[Pat]

for a piece of food brush, a

[Mike]

piece of, like, a piece of, like, your food or just, like, a whole other meal that you're buying them?

[Young Man]

Just like a whole other meal, bro. And they be going crazy, too. They'd be like, let me get a large, too. Like, I'm just trying to feed you, bro. You know what I mean? Like, I don't mind at all, bro.

[Pat]

You got money.

[Mike]

You say you don't mind, but obviously you do. Mine it's okay to mine, too.

[Young Man]

No, I don't. I. I don't mind if he's like, like, yo, bro, can I. Nah, he'd be going crazy, bro. Hey, yo, and, like, we go. We go. Oh, we go out to eat sometimes, bro. Right? And he don't be telling me if I got him until the check get here.

[Pat]

Oh, damn.

[Young Man]

Mind you, bro. He's my close friend, bro. He's my close friend. I've been trying to put him on because, bro, I'll be doing day trading and, like, I'll be working on the trades and type.

[Pat]

But he just.

[Young Man]

But he's just lazy, bro.

[Pat]

Just elite. Trying to cut him off, man. How old are you?

[Young Man]

I'm 21, bro. I just turned 21.

[Pat]

Oh, get rid of that, bro. Yeah, you back, bro. You 21. You want a bigger and better things, bro. He literally holding you back, bro.

[Mike]

Have you confronted him, bro?

[Young Man]

Literally. Nah.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Young Man]

Yeah, but I'm not that type of person to, like, call out somebody, like, in front of everybody. You know what I mean?

[Pat]

Oh, you're a hoe. Got it. This means I gotta motivate him, bro.

[Young Man]

Yeah, no, I'll be trying, bro, but,

[Pat]

like, no, no, ain't no trying, bro. Ain't no trying. The next time y' all go, I want you to take him out. Next time, I want you to take them out to eat on purpose. You go to the most expensive restaurant, and when a. And when a waiter get there, you say, me and him splitting the bill. And look that dead in his eyes, bro.

[Young Man]

He's gonna imma try it, bro, but it's not gonna go good.

[Pat]

For who?

[Female Caller]

He just for me, bro.

[Mike]

You scared of him?

[Young Man]

No, I'm not scared of him at all. It's just like, I don't want to look like a hoe.

[Mike]

You know what I mean?

[Pat]

What do you mean? How you gonna look like a hoe?

[Young Man]

I'm just like, oh, we're from the split. He's just like, what the. Like, you always get me.

[Pat]

What do you.

[Young Man]

But now I get you, though. I'm trying, though. I'm gonna try it.

[Pat]

Say that sentence again. What is he gonna say to you?

[Young Man]

Like, I. You always get me.

[Pat]

Like, come on, bro. Don't sound. That's what that sound like to you?

[Young Man]

Nah, I'm not like that. Like, I. He looks up to me like I'm Mr. B. Beast or something, bro.

[Mike]

Yeah, it's time to get rid of him, bro.

[Pat]

No, listen, bro, that is a leech, bro. You got to get rid of him, bro, he gonna do that for the rest of your life. You ain't even got that much money.

[Young Man]

But, yeah, what happened when you're right,

[Pat]

when your day trade and take off and you end up being a millionaire, he gonna still be there asking for money, bro. He never gonna do it on his own.

[Young Man]

You're right, but. And that's. Bro, that's what I've been trying to tell him. Like, he can't even feed off me, bro.

[Mike]

Like, yeah, because you're gonna hold. You're gonna start holding, like, a lot of animosity towards him too.

[Friend]

Too.

[Young Man]

Yes, exactly, bro. And bro, it's like he not even trying to hide it. Sometimes we be. We'll be out. And sometimes he be with the, like, with the hoes, bro. Like, oh, yeah, he always get me. Like, he always got money on him, like, blah, blah, blah. Like, bro, I got paid. I got bills to pay, bro. Like, yeah, you know what I'm saying? I can't always get him.

[Pat]

Like, he might be using you. How tall is you, bro?

[Young Man]

How What?

[Pat]

How tall are you?

[Young Man]

I'm like 510 on a good day.

[Pat]

Yeah, bro, he using you, bro.

[Young Man]

I mean, he's like. He's like 5 7.

[Mike]

He's like, after everybody established what, he's using you.

[Young Man]

He's like. He's like five seven, chubby. And he'd be trying to put me in there so he could get some. You know what I mean?

[Pat]

Yeah, he using. He usually gets you out in the girls. He using you to eat. Next thing you know, he gonna be using you for real. He keep playing around.

[Mike]

Oh, my God.

[Young Man]

Damn you right? Hold on.

[Pat]

He gonna wear you out.

[Mike]

It's really fast.

[Young Man]

Yeah,

[Pat]

let him take a little bit. He gonna take it off. Okay. So I want to say you. You never know what people going through. Right. I recently seen a dude venting on Instagram that he's a black sheep.

[Mike]

Okay.

[Pat]

And he's a black sheep of his family. Nobody respects him. They're actually envious of him going to college and pursuing his dreams. And he basically says they are mad because I won't give them money and I won't, quote, unquote, put them on, but they're put on is coming off as like, like, you know, like, freeloading.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know, like, some people ask you to put them on, but it's like, oh, you want me to put you all the way on the spot? Like, right next to me with no work put in.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And we didn't grow up together type. So that's how he was like portraying his family and like at the end of his rant he got. Maybe it was some back and forth that I missed, but he actually started tagging people like in his family.

[Young Man]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And I clicked on one of the tags just to check all these stories is now I'm invested in the story. Like, damn them. Did one of them respond? And I finally found one cousin. One of his cousins responded in a story and tagged him back. I'm looking at the story and he's like, bro, all this was over because granddad dropped 75 and you picked it up and you claim it was your 75. So that's why you should never believe people when they vent in bro. There's always another side to the story when people vent and they don't express the other person's side and basically say, hey, I see what they mean, but this is what I really mean. You know what I mean? But. Or they, but then they really switch it up when they be like, it was this, that and this and that. And then like, damn, what about the other side? Like you're not mentioning the other side enough for me to believe you.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Is.

[Pat]

This is a very one sided thing.

[Mike]

I feel like that happens to me like when I was like dating in a sense where you can kind of judge sometimes a girl about how they talk about their ex. Because there's some girls that obviously the ex are done, done terrible things to them. But there's like a, a sense of peace that a woman has where it's like they're, they're, they say he was a shitty person but they don't continue saying like that over your relationship.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Remind me like any bad thing that happens, that's. That reminded me of this person. That reminded me of my ex, that remind me of my ex and he was that type of thing. I think it shows a level of like healing when you like even as guys too. Like a level of healing when you don't. You don't have to bad, bad mouth your ex all the time in a sense.

[Female Caller]

Sense.

[Mike]

Especially when you have that first who you dating conversation. I feel like that shouldn't really have to reoccur. Negative. The negative stuff of the relationship need to recur.

[Pat]

And I just sometimes goes off the selection of your partner.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like the, like your, your partner's selection process. And you know, I mean that might make me look at myself differently.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I'm saying? It's just like, okay, you hated all of your exes. Right. And you, you told Me about five dudes. They all did you wrong. Okay. Even if they all did you wrong, there has to be something you felt like you did wrong.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And then you never felt wrong about it. You're not telling me, hey, it might have been because I was doing such and such, and I never hear that. And it was him, him, him, him, him. Not only two things could be true.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Right. It's either you're lying and you did something to, like, actually help with the process of not being with that person, or you just don't know how to pick them. And maybe I'm number six and I'm fucked up, too.

[Mike]

There's. There's literally certain conversations I've had on dates where it's like, they'll be describing what. Why their last relationship didn't work out, and then you, like, started scratching your head. Like, I kind of do that too.

[Pat]

That's the worst.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Mike]

But you kind of have to just make it through the date and whatever type of goal you're trying to get to.

[Pat]

Yeah. I mean, we just had a girl on a podcast that did that, and, like, men do it too is where they're telling you a story about why something didn't work.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

I literally had a dude just be like, bro, I literally cheated one time and I was only three months in, and she found out seven months in and still broke up with me.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Just like, bro, she don't trust you.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like, what you, like, what you want me to do with this situation? Like, what advice you want me to give you? Or just like, oh, yeah, like the girl we had on earlier, she's like, oh, yeah, he pays all the bills and stuff like that, but he want me to see. He want me to not go out in club.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Yeah. His money kind of like, what do you think comes with that territory?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Unless you entered a relationship.

[Mike]

50.

[Pat]

50. And it turned into that. If you start looking for someone that's gonna provide for you.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Then it's gonna come with some, like, probably nine out of 10 times, I

[Mike]

feel like, too, like, that should be a compatibility thing too. Like, if you like going out, find somebody that likes going out. That's it. If you don't like going out that much, find somebody that doesn't like going out that much. Much. I know sometimes dudes and girls can be like, they kind of can fake it a little bit.

[Pat]

Like, the.

[Mike]

The. How much they do go out, how much they don't go out. But I. I still think in this age, it's like, you're not gonna talk to do, like. Like, Only, like. Like, if you guys are. What's the word I'm looking for? Exclusive, Right.

[Young Man 2]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Young Man]

There you go.

[Mike]

But if you guys are exclusive, right. And you can tell in, like, two months if this goes, like, he goes out or he doesn't go out a lot, but.

[Pat]

But even then, they could just ask.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And, like, most people are pretty honest about. Nobody lies about how much they go out.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

No dude's gonna lie to you or no woman's gonna lie to you. Be like, I go out this much and then actually exceed that. Actually, I'm lying. They do everybody be lying.

[Mike]

Yeah, everybody. I do think as, like, people in general, we undersell sometimes. Like, the. The things we do that might be deemed as, like, negative in a sense.

[Pat]

Yeah. Because you want the person to like you.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

When you never had to do that.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like, literally, bro, y months in and you still telling her you love to go camping. Like, come on, let it go, bro. You never pitch a 10 in your life.

[Mike]

Go. Go on another camping trip this weekend, man. Utah. This time in Wyoming, because he was trying to get some butt, man.

[Pat]

Taking beautiful pictures in Utah, knowing he want to be on 2k.

[HEF (rapper)]

Bro.

[Pat]

Just be yourself, bro. Find a. Find a girl that love games.

[Mike]

Sometimes you can, like, find a new hobby through the person you meet as well. You know that.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

I think because you might not like hiking, and you might kind of, like, blemish how much you do like hiking.

[Pat]

Right.

[Mike]

And, like, the girl you with, she loves hiking. So now you're hiking all the time. You can. You can fall in love with hiking.

[Pat]

Yeah. But you.

[Young Man]

It.

[Pat]

I'm saying it shouldn't be something you hate, though.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know, if you hate. Really. If you really hate outdoors.

[Mike]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Pat]

It's okay to admit that. And I think that's the first problem with a lot of people is that they're afraid to admit that. And they say, if I have this, then I won't do that. That's not true. Like, oh, if I was in a relationship, I wouldn't like to go out as much. It's like, bro, you'd be out to, like, 5:00am yeah. You love this shit, bro. Like, me, I love going out. I would never lie to a woman again. You know what I mean? Like, I feel like everybody's lied or, like, undersoul how much they love going out. And I was like, I will never, like, you know, confuse somebody like that again. I love going out.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

If my friends are out, like, I Hope you want to go with me. Like, I love the night.

[Mike]

Huh? Some nights.

[Pat]

Some nights.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Some nights is just for the guys, you know what I'm saying? And like. And in saying that, you got to find a woman that does that and also does that.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I'm saying? Like, not understands that. Because when you go with the understands, understandings can change. Yeah, No, I need somebody that does that and practices that so they know the importance. And night I like to go out. You like to go out with your girls so you understand how important a girl's night is. You understand how important. Strip clubs,

[Mike]

people are cool with that, though. Like, people have those relationship dynamics where like, they don't care if their guy goes to the strip club.

[Pat]

Yeah. Or they'll go with them. Yeah. They slapping ass too.

[Mike]

They have to go with them.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Young Man]

That, that.

[Mike]

Sometimes that seems like a vibe.

[Friend]

Yeah.

[Mike]

But it's like I feel like I would be personally be like, like, what can I do and what can't I do? It's like a conversation like you don't want to ask because it's like, you don't be like, hey, can I.

[Pat]

You slowly doing it. So when you first get in there, you're ignoring all the girls. Like, they're kind of stinking here. And then you see. No, she talking about it smell good. You be like, it do smell good.

[Mike]

Oh yeah, yeah. It must have been the bathroom.

[Pat]

Must have been like, somebody must have did something. Then a girl started dancing by you. Like, ah, I would never. I wouldn't talk to no girl like that. She'd be like. Like I would. She fine as hell. You know what? She is fine. I a see like come over here. Then she get the shaking ass. You like, oh, man, she be like, I'm about to touch you. She be like, I was about to say the same. Yeah. You start going too crazy. She like, I say that. I say, no private dance without me.

[Mike]

You getting a lap ass. You got to keep the straightest face.

[Pat]

This not better than yours, baby. Your jiggle way better.

[Mike]

You gotta maintain eye contact.

[Pat]

Yep. I've been giving an 8 out of 10. That's the best I ever had, bro.

[Mike]

I just won't even rank their best. The best lap dance they ever got.

[Pat]

Yeah. Like, I don't, you know, but the. The crazy thing about situations like that is sometimes they lead to arguments. That's why you should always have the talk in full. I love talking through scenarios. Like if. If you can think of a scenario with your significant other you should talk about it. I think that's so healthy to be like, oh, I just thought of this. If we were here and I did this and you did this, what would happen?

[Mike]

I hate arguing over hypothetical, but.

[Pat]

No, it's not about arguing over hypotheticals, but sometimes, like, having that conversation before stops. Because sometimes the moment can be the death of the relationship.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And, like, maybe that a little annoying. Like, back and forth, like, oh, we. If we had kids, I wouldn't want them to do such and such. Or such and such. Now you know. You know what I'm saying? Now you know, they don't.

[Young Man]

They.

[Pat]

They would never yell at their kids. So now you mad seven years later because your wife don't like you yelling at the kids. She told you that, bro.

[Mike]

And that scenario, I've legit had arguments about that before. My, like, past relationships where I'll say something online. It'd be like a hypothetical. It'd be like. I think one time we talked about. It was like the only fans thing. Would you date the only fans person, or would you do only fans for $4 million?

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And I was like, I don't know. Yeah. In real life, she asked me that. I was like, I don't know. And it was like. That was like an argument. It's like, what do you mean? I mean, I. Because I personally don't know what I would do in certain situations if there was money put in front of me. There's obviously some hard things. There's like, kill a family member. No, I would never do. I'm just saying.

[Co-worker]

I'm just.

[Mike]

I'm just saying that's not off the

[Pat]

table, but it would be a crazy amount of money in a crazy amount of immunity.

[Mike]

But no, it's so crazy.

[Pat]

How is that crazy?

[Mike]

Nah, nah. I can't even trust this dude. Oh, you got an off mic. Like, what?

[Young Man 2]

You ain't.

[Pat]

You ain't got cousins like mine, man.

[Mike]

No, I'm talking about just even me in general.

[Pat]

No, no, I would. Come on, man. It would take. It wouldn't take no money. Wait, am I saying this right? It would take a crazy amount of money.

[Mike]

No, that's crazy.

[Pat]

Like, bro, you got like.

[Mike]

Honestly, I think if somebody presented that to me that said a billion dollars to have somebody assassinate Pat, right. I would say no. But I also then will come to you and be like, what did you do first? Before I say no, I'll come to you like, what did you do that some people. Somebody put a billion dollars on your.

[Pat]

Okay, let me tell you the difference between me and you, brother, if somebody put. Put a billion on your head,

[Female Caller]

I

[Pat]

just give you a head start. Like, come on now, bro. Hey, I gotta text you this. My boy. I ain't even gonna surprise him. I'm gonna give him a chance to get away. Cause a billion on your head, like, yes, it has to be done. Because if a billionaire is telling me to get you, I'm next. What, you think I'm saying no to a nigga that just put a billion on your head? I might not leave that building.

[Mike]

That's crazy.

[Pat]

Would you rather be me or somebody.

[Mike]

Not as bad as your friend, does it.

[Pat]

No, for real, bro.

[Mike]

Hell no. All right. We're about to do our own little throwback here, I think.

[Pat]

I think, Dirk, the biggest difference between white people and black people protesting is white people be trying to get caught. Black people actually run.

[Mike]

Like, when the.

[Pat]

You know, when the cops break that line. All right, everybody go to jail. White people be dropping to their knees.

[Female Caller]

I shall not leave.

[Pat]

They handcuff theyself to a building. Like, what the. You arresting yourself? We gotta go. Ashley, get the car. I now, you know, it's funny. I now regret that clip. Only in knowing that handcuffing yourself to some shit is the toughest shit you can do.

[Mike]

You think so?

[Pat]

That's, like, so disrespectful to a cop. Like, a cop already want to arrest somebody. It's like, no, I'm about to make you arrest me, bro. Bro, I'm about to arrest myself. Come get me. Come get me, you weak. So then when, you know, when a cop put you in cuffs, I already been in cuffs, bro.

[Mike]

Yeah. Now they're struggling to get the cuffs off.

[Friend]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pat]

It's like, bro, take. Take me downtown, bro. At some point, like, if you know you're going to jail, I feel like it's just best to start bossing the cops around. Put me in the backseat, bro.

[Mike]

It only works for some people.

[HEF (rapper)]

Oh, yeah.

[Pat]

Don't say that.

[Mike]

Don't get.

[Female Caller 2]

Don't.

[Mike]

Hey, don't get too. Don't get too confident.

[Pat]

You know, sometime this m be making me forget I'm black. I'd be, like, talking like, ah, I probably can't even talk like that. They gonna beat the out of me. Go get pulled over. Like, huh, huh? You think you run us, huh? I heard the podcast. I feel like every cop. Go ahead.

[Mike]

I was gonna say my. I feel like a lot of my police interactions, I obviously haven't had one in. In a while. Knock on. On Wood. But I think mines are like always. I always think about. I think I'm in the position now. It's just like if they're doing something that I deem like wrong, I'm just. If you want to arrest me, take me to jail, I'll just say just go back.

[Pat]

Clip that.

[Mike]

Just go ahead. I just said at this point, just go ahead. I just feel like I have so many means of like defending myself when it. When it counts.

[Pat]

I'm not begging. Yeah, that over with.

[Co-worker]

Yeah.

[Female Caller 2]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Especially if I think you in the wrong. I'm not begging.

[Mike]

Yeah, go do what you gotta do.

[Pat]

Once I use my little tick tock that I learned like go get your supervisor. I don't have to do that. And you break what it is the rules. I'm done begging, bro. I'll see you in court, bro. This is about to be my toughest assignment yet.

[Mike]

You got just put in my live.

[Pat]

I'm about to sue the out you, bro. I'm about to sue you so bad you not even gonna have your taser on you when you're out in the field. I own that dog the suit. I'm about to sue you for that Forge.

[Mike]

You got Internet shaming is. Is becoming a good thing now I think so. There was this, this couple on the Internet and I guess he's a. He was a white male and he's dating a black woman. Right. And then a person in the marines or something like that commented on their. On their video and he called her a N word lover. Hard er. Right. And so then they made another video, put his name on there, found out where his military base is, called his supervisor, found out where they worked at and stuff like that. That and those like with those videos. I love it because. But the main thing I really want to see how like I wish there was a camera that follows the person so I can see how that really affected there. Yeah, I like when people like get caught like that because it's like people talk so tough on the Internet and just like to see them in real person just to let other people know. Like these people that be you be arguing on the Internet with that you be getting mad or worked up on the Internet and be calling you names and like that on the Internet.

[Pat]

Internet.

[Mike]

Some of these dudes are just geeks, like no personality and nothing like that.

[Pat]

I would say like 99 of them are like all the real people that would do they not on the Internet like that and they definitely not arguing on the Internet. Now you can run into that 1%. Like, for some reason, this dude, there's

[Mike]

some people to talk spice.

[Pat]

He lived deep in Compton, but he just good in tech. And he got. He got a burner account with 200,000 thousand followers. And you think you're just talking to a page and he actually come do something to you. So be careful out there.

[Mike]

I just feel the people shouldn't allow social media to, like, bully. Like you should. Obviously.

[Pat]

People turn the computer off.

[Mike]

No, I'm just. No, seriously, though, in the sense of, like, just know these people don't have real lives. Like the people that talk about you on the Internet, bro. That something is wrong, which I've never left a negative comment about something somebody like, unprovoked. If it wasn't like, funny or. What negative comment did I leave? I leave.

[Pat]

Huh?

[Mike]

What negative comment did I leave?

[Pat]

You always do, bro.

[Mike]

What negative comment?

[Pat]

I'm talking about, you send them to me, though.

[Mike]

That's different, though. I don't mind, though. I'm just saying, though, like, if I don't want to ever, like, if I have a thought about something, I do judge a lot, you know, I judge people sometimes. Yeah, right. But it's more like usually it's kind of like a funny judging. It's not like anything that would make me treat that person differently. Yeah, but to write a negative comment under somebody's like, degrading them. Not even like an opinion or something like that, but, like, degrading them.

[Pat]

I don't want. I don't want to ever write a negative comment on somebody's one is because I could be wrong.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You know what I mean? I could type some shit and then go back and be like, damn, I can't believe I said that. Like, damn, my bad. So I don't even want to put myself in that situation.

[Mike]

Yeah, well, I think you can. People can write disagreements, obviously. Like, I'm not saying that. I'm just like. Like, for instance, there was this couple that got. I guess they got married or something like that. It was a skinny, skinny dude. Dude and a bigger woman. Right. And anytime I see videos, stuff like that, that pop up in my suggestion.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

I already know that it's not for a good reason because it's a regular person's account. Why am I. Why does this have this many. Way more shares than it does likes.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

You know, like that. So they were like. Obviously they were cooking the. The bigger girl and stuff like that. Because the dude was like, skinny and then she was bigger and stuff like that. But I'm Just like, even in that sense of it, it's like, why do people even need. Feel the need to comment on some.

[Pat]

You know what's funny is like, like, like that grows.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

And that's why I get mad at people that don't delete comments. I'm telling you, I've been to a video where I'm watching a video and I'm like, I know there's negative comments on this video, thousand percent, just like you just said. But when I go to the comments, it's nothing but positive comments. But you're like, damn, this video got 200, 000 likes and 70 comments. Like, the ratio don't match up. And they deleted all the comments. So now anybody that has anything that they feel like they want to say negative, they probably won't because most people just like to jump into some. Yeah, they look at the first comment and the first comment got 200 likes and it's the most liked comment and it's a negative comment. Now that person that was on the fence about putting a negative comment, now here they come trying to blow up. I know people be trying to blow up off Instagram comments. I know somebody that comment on every single thing.

[Mike]

That's the thing.

[Pat]

And they being derogatory to every video because only because they trying to go viral.

[Mike]

Because you're incentivized, especially because you can see how many likes your stuff gets and people want those views on their page. So people are incentivized to make a comment, whether positive or, or negative. But I don't know. Do y'?

[Female Caller]

All.

[Pat]

But yeah, do y'.

[Co-worker]

All.

[Pat]

News though. Big disappointment struck fans of world football star Lionel Messi in India, who reportedly paid for expensive tickets but could not see the idol. The situation sparked anger amongst fans who felt aggrieved, especially after a huge effort and expense was spent just to see Messi's performance. Performance and some. The first comment is the scammers got scammed, but it was so stupid. Like he didn't show up. So they tore up the stadium. It's like, okay, now he's really not coming back.

[Mike]

Now some people, I think especially those, like different countries where they don't see those celebrities that, that come there often. That's why those shows be so hyped. People be wondering like, like why the shows be so hype in like the, all those European countries and stuff like that. Like this artist probably comes here once, once, once every five years, once every three years.

[Pat]

And there's no other people that are coming there. Like, I I want to go out and say lebron's never been to India.

[Mike]

I can think he'd been there.

[Pat]

You think LeBron's been to India?

[Mike]

India is a pretty. Is a too big of a.

[Pat]

You think? Let's see.

[Mike]

I feel like he'd been to India randomly.

[Pat]

LeBron, India. LeBron has significant connection to India. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Has he ever been there, though? Has LeBron ever been to India? I don't think he's been there, though. He got. He got a connection. They love him over there, though.

[Mike]

I feel like India is just such a big country. You know, they say India is going to be in like five, six years. India's going to be the largest English

[Pat]

LeBron hasn't had a major, widely publicized trip to India.

[Friend]

India.

[Pat]

Oh, yes. But he got strong ties to him.

[Mike]

I feel like if you went to India, we would know.

[Pat]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Mike]

He's going on a private vacation to India.

[Pat]

Come on, man.

[Mike]

No, I'm just saying I feel like when it's not like you don't record it.

[HEF (rapper)]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

How many people go to the. Any different country, especially in exclusive. Like a country that nobody really visited. I think me going to Sweden and not. There's no video proof of that.

[Pat]

I was there. That's what I'm saying.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

That's how I knew he hasn't been to India. I feel like I would have heard about that one.

[Mike]

Why would you think you would hear about. About it? Say, why do you think if you hear about it?

[Pat]

I'm just saying, like, LeBron going to India. I feel like there will be a time where people would take that video because that's a country to me, obviously, like, with the messy thing, like, not a lot of celebrities go to. So, like, when there's.

[Mike]

They just had a rolling loud there.

[Pat]

But I'm saying, like, not a lot of celebrities like Lionel Messi, because he's like. You know what I'm saying? Like, he's from a different country and he's like a superstar.

[Mike]

He's not just an American tourism country, I feel like.

[Pat]

Correct. So it's like him being there and other celebrities not going as much makes it even bigger than him being there. Like, if Messi came to la, right, and, like, people got notified exactly what restaurant he was in, even though it would be a mob, it wouldn't be as big as a mob. Is Tulsa, Oklahoma.

[Mike]

No, I feel that.

[Pat]

You know what I'm saying? Not many people sliding through there.

[Mike]

I feel it. But we might Anyway, yeah, that's been the podcast. Make sure you guys subscribe to the Patreon. It is half off this month. YouTube viewers, we're dropping the Patrick Cloud episode on Saturday. He cloud the goat on Saturday, so make sure you guys tune into that one. Yeah, what else we got to promote?

[Pat]

Y' all know who Patrick Cloud is? He's the one that started Roast Me and like, all the. They got dad jokes on there and his clips. We posted Kev on stage in there. Obviously you see him on like our last clip, but. But just giving you like a heads up, you've definitely seen him before. If. If you don't recognize the name. And then like, obviously y' all that do recognize the name know how goated he is.

[Mike]

And then live show Chicago again. Appreciate y' all for selling out our first show like a month, like almost like a month and a half before we even announced it on the social media like that. We probably posted it twice.

[Pat]

We still had. We're supposed to do like, that's what y' all up. By selling out too early. Y. I don't want to tell y' all not to sell out too early, but y' all up a funny promo. We had a funny promo to put out, but now I guess, you know, we'll save it for, you know, obviously we're going to do bigger shows. We're doing a small venue on purpose. Our first goal was to sell out. You know, we're going to take that easy trophy. You know what I'm saying? We just sold out, so. But we're obviously going to do bigger venues and obviously we're going to come more places. So, like. And it's still going to be exclusive. We're not going to also go on like a big ass tour.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

I just want y' all to know

[Mike]

it's probably gonna be like, we're like 10, 15 cities.

[Pat]

Yeah, I would say 10 or 15 a year. Yeah, like, we. We're not right now. We not like about to do like a 25 city tour. Like some of the comedians be like, date, date, date, date, date.

[Mike]

We're trying to do after event in Chicago as well. So if you're in Chicago and you know any venues that would want to like, do like, we're trying to do like a meet and greet there.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

Like a bar lounge type of area. So if y' all know any places, hit us up.

[Pat]

No hugs, bro.

[Mike]

All right, y'.

[Friend]

All.

[Mike]

That's with the episode. Peace.