Wearing The Same Size As Your Girl - Episode 251

Summary

Crash Dummies Podcast – Episode 251: "Wearing the Same Size As Your Girl"

Hosts: Patrick Johnson (Pat) & Michael Esiobu (Mike)
Guest: Carrie
Date: March 25, 2026

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Episode Overview

In episode 251 of Crash Dummies Podcast, Pat and Mike, joined by recurring guest Carrie, take listeners on a hilarious and candid ride through current events, outrageous scenarios, and personal confessions. This episode is heavy with fan interactions, stories of questionable purchases, relationship shenanigans, and their signature blend of roast humor and insight. The hosts riff on everything from club dance moves to bachelor party etiquette, with plenty of “did-they-really-just-say-that?” moments.

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Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. The Modern Approach Game

• Mike shares his thoughts on approaching women today:
  Mike: “Shout out to International Women's Century... But what's being lost is, like, men knowing how to approach a woman.” [00:35]
  Details a cringeworthy pickup attempt involving comparing women, leading to a drink thrown in someone’s face.
  • Pat: “That's not a bad shot.” [01:36]
  • Mike disagrees firmly, calling out men for putting down other women to impress.

2. Tour Talk, Live Shows, and Partying in New Cities

• Pat and Mike promote upcoming live shows and muse on anonymity while traveling:
  Pat: “It is really fun to party in other cities because no one knows who you are.” [03:52]
  The crew jokes about letting loose with dance moves and acting out in cities where they’re strangers.
• Dancing Discussion:
  • Mike on club dancers: “Them dudes that be in the middle of the club dancing and they can hit every move, they can twerk.” [04:39]
  • Pat: “Everybody has their own thing that they do that’s fun for them in clubs.” [05:49]

3. “Friendship Cuck” and Listener Dynamics

• Listener calls themselves a “friendship cuck,” sparking a breakdown of the term
  Mike: “A cuck is someone who gets off on their partner having sex with other people while they watch in the same room...” [08:45]
  The group dissects “friendship cucks” (fans living vicariously through the hosts’ dynamic).
  • Carrie: “That sounds so sad. They sound lonely.” [10:35]
  • Mike: “We get lonely, too, bro… I know it looks like we got a lot of money—and we do.” [11:08]

4. Money, Value, and Group Spending Habits

• Money not feeling real overseas:
  Pat: “Is it me or does money not seem real when you’re in other countries?” [12:01]
• Splurging on group outings versus personal spending:
  • Mike: “If it’s 5,000 in a business account and we're at a bar, we like, get shots on us. Like, it's not the same money.” [14:21]
  • Stories of giving back to fans at live shows.

5. Celebrity Relationships and Media Drama

• Shade Room’s messiness with celeb family coverage:
  Mike: “If someone is famous, to make an article about any family member that's also not trying to pursue being famous is crazy.” [16:28]
• Celebrity Couple Dynamics—Will & Jada
  Play a clip where Jada discusses living separately from Will [19:20].
  • Mike: “The GOAT celebrity relationship to me is Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith. They give us something every single year.” [19:13]
  • Pat: “If you can afford to live apart and that works for you, I don’t see a problem.” [20:15]
• Reflections on open relationships:
  • Mike: “I just would never do an open relationship because like I already don’t with a lot of dudes…” [22:56]

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Fan Collab Segment: "Wildest Thing You Ever Spent Money On"

(Listeners call in and share their wildest purchases)

a) Spending on a High School Sweetheart

• Caller bought her boyfriend a $1500 necklace in high school.
  Listener: “He probably pawned it because life was rough, so he probably bonded. But after that...he broke up with me.” [30:21]

b) Etsy Witchcraft

• A listener paid an Etsy witch to ruin her ex’s life.
  • Listener: “He ruined mine, it was his turn...I think it did [work], actually.” [34:01]
  • Mike: “When you open yourself up to witchcraft, you opening it up to be done back to you.” [36:18]

c) Designer Condom Flexes

• Truck driver spent $70 on a fake Louis Vuitton condom just for the look (it was just a regular wrapper).
  • Mike: “You bought the condom as an accessory...and then have sex raw.” [40:23]

d) Fake Record Deal Scam

• Caller paid $1200 for a fake record deal.
  • Guest Rapper: “I was like, oh, this is my big break, yo.” [41:30]

e) Harry Potter Butt Plug

• Caller’s girlfriend bought him a Harry Potter-themed butt plug as a joke (she routinely gifts ‘freaky’ things as pranks).
  • Pat: “She’s cooking up something…” [51:52]

f) Posting Ex on Social Media

• Caller’s unapologetic “I don’t give a f*” moment was publicly posting her ex on the “T app” to crowd-source info about his other women.**
  • Listener: “I was trying to be a girls girl...she’s like, no, you’re just a bird, you just want him back.” [55:02]

g) Apologizing for Overly Honest Critique

• Past guest returns to apologize to his friend for calling his music “ass” on-air.
  • Guest Rapper: “I'm just copping a plea right now. Like, hey, big bro, I ain't even mean all that. I was just trying to be funny for the pod.” [60:20]

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"Tweeter the Weeks" (Funny Deleted Tweets)

[A round-robin of viral, dumb, or darkly comic tweets]

• Mike: “Somebody tweeted, ‘Yo, scrape that nigga off the field. We got a game to play.’ Crazy.” [62:24]
• Obituary humor, LeBron James checking shirt tucks, and more riffing on social media absurdity.

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“Wearing the Same Size As Your Girl” — The Shoe Dilemma

Central theme explored near show’s end

• Mike’s confession:
  Mike: “I’m shopping…tried to get a shoe in my size 11…turned around and this woman had them on her foot… Until now, I never thought a big foot would bother me, but a 5'9" woman wearing an 11? Nah.” [70:44]
  • Debate over sharing clothes/shoes in couples.
  • Pat: “Same size shoe is a little critical…” [72:23]
  • Mike: “I wouldn’t want that…that’s where it stops for me.” [72:50]
  • Carrie: “If it’s not her size, you know it’s from another man.” [73:50]

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Bachelor and Bachelorette Party Behavior

• Carrie asks:
  Carrie: “How do men be acting on bachelor’s trips? My fiancé is the best man in Cancun.” [86:54]
• Hosts’ breakdown:
  • If the leader is relationship-minded, the trip is typically mild.
  • Pat: “I’d want it more activity-based. Paintball, soccer, something competitive.” [89:28]
  • Clubs are expected, but heavy debauchery is downplayed.
  • Mike: “I’m not into like hired women. That always throws me off.” [90:45]
  • Discuss men/women energy at parties and how dynamics change based on the group.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On relationships:
  • Mike: “Somebody gotta die. Can only be one. Maybe one of us.” [22:56]
• On viral fan dynamics:
  • Mike: “You are cucks.” [08:34]
• On promotional offers:
  • Mike: “You big. Y’ all still got a chance. Some big ass shirts.” [02:10]
• On splitting up live show profits:
  • Pat: “We spent it on shots for the people that came. Who the fuck are we?” [15:04]
• On imported fast food:
  • Pat: “You think I was about to diss [In and Out]? Felt like, you know, he was right.” [85:10]

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Listener Engagement & International Shoutouts

• Dublin, Ireland listener requests boyfriend “Des” get a birthday shoutout.
  • Pat: “No, we’re not doing it, bro.” [76:45]
  • Playful banter but ultimately, they shout him out anyway.
• Several call-ins invite listeners to shows, foster ongoing interaction (“Come to the live show, bring your boyfriend, we'll get you back together!”).

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Finale: Legacy, Friendship, and Aging Out of Podcasting

• Nostalgic reflections on how long the pod might run, with mentions of retiring at 50, moving into other entertainment formats (Family Feud, Wheel of Fortune).
• Pat: “I think after we're like, 50, we probably won't be friends anymore.” [66:59]
• Mike: “If y’ all think I'm gonna be in my upper 40s doing a podcast, y’ all crazy.” [67:29]

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Closing Notes: Plugs & Merch

• Carrie plugs her podcast and Brewers game hosting.
• Pat and Mike push Crash Dummies merch, tour dates, and social handles.
• Mike: “DM me some ideas for merch, y’all not getting no credit, maybe a free shirt...asking for 10 is getting you blocked.” [93:50]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:35] – Modern Approach to Women & Pickup Lines
• [04:10] – Partying in Unfamiliar Cities
• [08:45] – “Cuck” and Listener Dynamics
• [12:01] – Money Feels Different Abroad
• [16:28] – Shade Room & Celebrity Family Media Exploitation
• [19:13] – Will & Jada Living Apart Discussion
• [22:56] – Open Relationships Debate
• [26:50+] – Callers Share Their Dumbest Purchases (jewelry, witchcraft, butt plugs, record deal, etc.)
• [55:02] – “I don’t give a f***” Moments: Exes & Social Media
• [62:14] – "Tweeter the Weeks" (viral/deleted tweets)
• [70:44] – “Wearing the Same Size As Your Girl” Discussion
• [86:54] – Bachelor/Bachelorette Party Dynamics
• [93:46] – Listener/Host Plugs & Closing

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Tone & Style

The entire episode is marked by fast-paced banter, a mix of raunchy humor and self-deprecation, audience engagement, and the hosts’ genuine “locker room but big-hearted” style. The boundaries between host, guest, and listener are especially blurred in this episode, highlighting Crash Dummies’ interactive, anything-goes atmosphere.

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Recommended Listening for:

• Fans of wild storytimes and authentic friendship dynamics
• Listeners who love live audience involvement, relationship debates, and banter infused with laugh-out-loud moments
• Anyone seeking insight into the millennial male mind, flavored with honesty and irreverent humor

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“Wearing the Same Size As Your Girl” – More Than Just Shoes, It’s About Where You Draw Your Lines.”

Transcript

[Mike]

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[Pat]

Unleash White Claw Surge.

[Mike]

Please drink responsibly. Hard seltzer with flavors, 8% alcohol by volume. White Cloth Seltzer Works, Chicago, Illinois.

[Carrie]

The World Moves fast.

[Mike]

Your workday even faster.

[Pat]

Pitching products, drafting reports, analyzing data.

[Mike]

Microsoft 365 Copilot is your AI assistant for work built into Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and other Microsoft 365 apps you use, helping you quickly write, analyze, create, and summarize so you can cut through clutter and clear a path to your best work. Learn [e-mail] M365 copilot. You know, you know what's being lost right now is, you know, shout out to international Women's Century, you know, shirts on sale right now. But what's being lost is, like, men knowing how to approach a woman. I'm not talking about, like, what. Whatever conversation happens between you and that woman after you introduce yourself. That's between y'.

[Listener Guest]

All.

[Mike]

I'm not here to give relationship advice. Yeah, but the approach I've been seeing, like, the couple that I've caught have been crazy. I literally seen a dude go up to a girl and say, I just saw someone in that dress last week. You look way better than her.

[Pat]

That's not bad, though.

[Mike]

That's.

[Pat]

That's not bad. That's not a bad shot.

[Mike]

No, no, no, no. Putting down another woman to get another woman is crazy.

[Pat]

Come on, now. I mean, that's what you got to do sometimes.

[Mike]

If. I mean, women like it.

[Carrie]

Yeah, yeah, they like that.

[Mike]

Nah, that was crazy. She threw a drink in that face.

[Carrie]

Really?

[Mike]

You. She said that was me. No, for real. Go get your shirts, though. Unless you. Unless you on.

[Pat]

I think they might be sold out.

[Mike]

You think they sold out by now?

[Pat]

Yeah, a lot of the sizes are

[Mike]

already pretty low, but not all the sizes.

[Pat]

Not all the sizes.

[Mike]

So you big. Y' all still got a chance. Some big ass shirts like,

[Pat]

yo, yo. That's not what we doing.

[Mike]

Hello.

[Pat]

Hey, the radio is for people who are driving. Think it's.

[Guest Rapper]

I'll drive them.

[Pat]

Welcome to Crash Dummies Podcast. Hey, welcome to Crash Dummies podcast. What episode is this? It doesn't matter what episode it is. It's in the title Chicago. Somebody's always getting mad the way I say it. But I don't care.

[Mike]

What's the. What's the other way?

[Pat]

Chicago. Chicago.

[Mike]

What you say?

[Pat]

Chicago.

[Mike]

Oh, okay. Maybe I'm off the loop too.

[Pat]

Tickets are pretty low. So please get your tickets by the time you guys are hearing this or to be probably Wednesday. So hopefully they're not sold out by then.

[Mike]

Got one day to get your ticket. Yeah, you literally should be online right now. Just literally let go of the will, grab your phone, fuck traffic.

[Pat]

We'll wait for you. We'll wait for you. Yeah, like and subscribe the the podcast obviously. Patreon. We got crash. That means merch.com crash that live Atlanta, Nashville. After Chicago we're going to see y'. All. So get your tickets. Don't wait till last minute. New York is very low. Tickets like they. It could be sold out by the time this is out. So don't wait on that. We might do a second show. We might not. We don't know yet.

[Mike]

Yeah, it depends on how the party's looking. You know we just got a Soho membership, so we don't know. It's either Soho or another show. It's either so ho or so long

[Pat]

since we're on tour. A thought came to me was that it is really fun to party in other cities because no one knows who you are. It's like you're never going to see this people again. So you legit can just try.

[Mike]

Exactly.

[Pat]

Like I would try a random dance like this don't know me.

[Mike]

You know that like I don't know

[Pat]

how to do the Dougie but this would be the place I would try to Dougie.

[Carrie]

Like in Tik Tok?

[Pat]

No, in. In North Dakota.

[Mike]

No that going to make it a Tik Tok. Like why is this Mike Wall Turking Wall Tur Fargo, North Dakota.

[Pat]

No, that be crazy.

[Mike]

We wouldn't see this.

[Pat]

I felt like if twerking was my thing, I would never do it in public. It would just be my own private thing.

[Mike]

No, that's actually so crazy cuz there's. Because there's definitely dudes that are out here that are good at twerking and they don't want to be good at it. You know what I'm saying? Like they definitely be like damn this crazy. Ain't I can do with this talent.

[Carrie]

How they figuring out they can do that?

[Mike]

Oh them asking it them know they've been. They've been pushed before. Don't push me. The was that the. I can make this move how I wanted to move.

[Pat]

I want my hips to tell the truth. I want my hips to stop lying to me.

[Mike]

That's why I be looking at them. The dudes that dance in the club, I be looking at them weird because it's like you can do any dance to me. Like them dudes that be in the middle of the club dancing and they can hit every move that can twerk.

[Carrie]

Do you feel like it's weird for men to dance out in the club? Like, how do y' all dance? Because it is kind of weird if you just doing tick tock dance with

[Mike]

a woman in front of me. That's how it is. I do the suge knife. Just choke my girl. We just rock it out.

[Pat]

I feel like everybody has their own thing that they do that's fun for them in clubs.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like do is the straight break dancing and the crumping against each other kind of funny to me? Yes. Would I do it? Probably not. But if. If those people are enjoying themselves, then it's like, I really can't be too, like, pressed about it. It's still funny to me, but I just wouldn't do that. Also, I don't know how to dance like that.

[Mike]

So I'm not getting a dance battle because I'm like a. I'm a medium dancer. Like, there's nothing like, you know what you can do.

[Pat]

Yes, exactly.

[Mike]

Like, I'm going to lose. I'm going to lose to a good dancer and then I'm going to lose to a terrible dancer. Because everybody just like, we seen your moves before. This ass. He's so ass that we actually all about to cheer him on and you still lose. So it's just like. It's just like a lose lose situation.

[Pat]

Especially as you're going against like a nerdy white boy.

[Mike]

Exactly. Or like an Asian dude.

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

Keep doing this same shit. He keep doing the same.

[Pat]

Because they don't look the part. It always like. And they don't look the part, it kind of amplifies, like their skills as well.

[Mike]

Exactly. That's always the thing, though. That's like the thing with anything is like with boxing, sports, when somebody doesn't look like they fit the part and they're talented, they get way more credit.

[Carrie]

Yeah.

[Pat]

That's why it goes viral more when like, remember that one time that white girl was going viral for like mouthing a little baby lyric when things are out the norm.

[Mike]

And I know that whole song. Yeah. How's she any better than me?

[Carrie]

Tommy too. Cuz Tommy Beancing here. Ain't that his name, right?

[Mike]

Yeah, but he black, though. He. He partially black.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah, he's 25% black.

[Carrie]

What?

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, we found that out, too.

[Carrie]

Never knew that. Shout out to black history.

[Mike]

Hold on now. I ain't saying all that. He still can't say, but he can dance. You know what I'm saying? Now that's my guy. Somebody sent me something. They tagged us on Tik Tok. I don't know why I never check our. Our mentions, bro. We literally get mentioned like, 10 times a day. Yeah, don't check them, because most of them be. People be, like, tagging us in, like, dark humor. Like, people tagged us in, like, a DV Dark humor. Yeah, and I had to. I had to DM that person, like, never tag us again. Yeah, this shit not funny to us, you lame ass nigga. I just wanted you to know that. But somebody tagged us in this, and they said, when I'm enjoying a podcast, then realize I'm genuinely a friendship cuck.

[Pat]

Is it because they're like, we don't know them in real life because we

[Mike]

don't know them in real life, and then they're watching our dynamic. You know what I mean? Like, we're all friends in real life, so they feel like a friendship cuck. Like, they watching us, like, now I'm friends with y'.

[Pat]

All. Some of y'.

[Carrie]

All.

[Pat]

I'm friends with some of y'.

[Mike]

All. No, no, no. You are cucks.

[Carrie]

Break that down for me.

[Mike]

Oh, you don't know what a cuck is?

[Guest Rapper]

No.

[Mike]

Oh, my God. Wow. This is perfect.

[Guest Rapper]

Okay,

[Pat]

listen, that's interesting.

[Mike]

So a cuck is someone who gets off on their partner having sex with other people while they watch in the same room. So usually, like, cut. Like, somebody saw that chair over there on Live, and they said that's a cut chair because that's usually where the partner.

[Pat]

It's, like, away from everything.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

With a good view.

[Mike]

It could be men or women, but it's majority men that do it that, like, want it. And most of the time it's because in. In the situations I've seen, because we have somebody on the podcast that was also a cook, it's because the woman wants to sleep around and the guy just, like, wants to be there. So they have some type of open relationship. But usually, like, in open relationships, it's always, like, mismatch, because it's easier for a woman to find a partner than it is a man. Especially if you like talking about open relationships, because don't care. You know what I'm saying?

[Pat]

You think it's harder for a guy to.

[Guest Rapper]

What?

[Carrie]

I always, like, ugly.

[Mike]

No, I didn't. Not anywhere. Like, you think so? Yeah, man. Right.

[Pat]

It depends on, like, what you're going for.

[Mike]

Okay. Like, you could just take a couple. Let's say the couple, they're both, like, sevens on the scale of, like, whatever they're being rated on. If they say, hey, we're both going to go to a club and see how quickly we can leave with somebody to hook up with. A woman could literally walk into 720 in about 10 minutes. She found a dude and they're walking out of there. That dude is literally probably in handcuffs because he's like, why are you around here asking girls for sex? He in jail, talking about. She talking about, I'm almost finished, baby. I'm gonna come get you out. I hate this game.

[Pat]

That is true.

[Mike]

But that's what a cuck is, though.

[Carrie]

That's interesting. So they're saying, so there's a friendship Cuckoo.

[Mike]

Yeah. Like, you enjoying someone's friendship from afar and you're not involved.

[Carrie]

That sounds so sad. They sound lonely.

[Mike]

Yeah. I feel like it's for, like, if you labeled as a cuck, it's, like, because you enjoy it, though. It's not, like, it's not a bad thing. They like that. They like watching the pod. So I love that we're not calling

[Pat]

our listeners, though, so just let y' all know that.

[Mike]

Just that one, I think. But also, y' all gotta realize, like, bruh, I know that's gonna sound crazy, but we get lonely, too, bro. Yeah. Like, we not all. We not always together. Like, I know it look like we enjoying ourselves, and we are. I know it look like we got a lot of money, and we do.

[Pat]

And I. I, for one, do not have a lot of money. I know.

[Mike]

Look like we got nice cars. We do, but it's like, you think our life better than yours. It's all about perspective. That's crazy. That's crazy.

[Pat]

There's definitely a couple. There's definitely a lot of listeners that have way more money.

[Mike]

Me? No.

[Pat]

No. You don't think so?

[Mike]

Not to me. I hate when I do that because,

[Pat]

like, people are going to tell you, you think you're for real.

[Mike]

YouTube listeners are probably, like, dying. Like, oh, that's so childish. But the audio listeners, like, man, it's evil. And I never realized why they thought I was so evil. And then I started listening to us on audio sometimes just to see how my Voice hear and I'm like. I sounded serious as when I said that like them probably think I'm a damn evil person.

[Guest Rapper]

Right.

[Pat]

Them all. Is it me or does money not seem real when you're in other countries? If I don't like when I'm in like Sweden or like Mexico, like it say it's pesos. Right. Or a sec. Right.

[Mike]

It's what?

[Pat]

Pesos.

[Carrie]

Pesos.

[Pat]

Pesos. Peso. What? How would you say it?

[Mike]

Pesos.

[Pat]

Pesos. Okay.

[Mike]

Damn. No, Jean, our go to. I was wrong too. I thought it was pesos.

[Pat]

The, the. The number I see on there doesn't. I don't do the conversions in my head right away. So I'm more inclined to buy something that in another country than I would.

[Carrie]

That's on purpose.

[Pat]

You think so?

[Carrie]

Oh yeah.

[Pat]

But it's more. They already put the dollar amount next day.

[Mike]

I think it's just a weird concept also now thinking about it is because everything is necessary at that point.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Right. Like in America I can go save money because I don't have food in the fridge. But it's just like if I go somewhere to get food while we in London, I gotta buy that food. If I come here, buy a shirt. I gotta buy a shirt that says I was in London or some. Also imagine if like here in America like all our. Our dollar signs are tags. Yeah. Like different currencies on it.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

It would just be too much.

[Pat]

The one thing you know something I dislike sometimes is when you go to expensive restaurants, sometimes they don't even put the price. Price on the. On the menu. And when they don't put the price on the menu, it makes me feel like it's like you're playing roulette in a sense. It's like oh, that sounds. That sounds expensive.

[Carrie]

Especially if you're on a date.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Carrie]

Oh my God. How embarrassing.

[Pat]

Oh man. No price.

[Carrie]

500.

[Pat]

No price on the menu. And you always have to act cool when the bill comes. No matter what. You can't, you can't break under pressure.

[Mike]

I don't even look at that.

[Pat]

No. I'm at the point now where I don't look. I don't look because I kind of have a gauge too. Because like usually I'm just going out to eat with my girl. So it's like it's pretty easy to gauge. Just like just take. I know how much everything is going to be.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

So I've never really been surprised on the. On the prices of things.

[Mike]

That's the only thing I enjoy now. That's the only thing that makes me feel like I have more money than I did 10 years ago is not paying attention to like what I eat and what I order.

[Pat]

But what is the group of four?

[Carrie]

The bill?

[Pat]

No, usually if we eat together, it's definitely. It's always a business thing.

[Mike]

Oh, always a business. Yeah. That's probably the bad part about us. We're so dumb. Like, if you took like if, okay, if we took like $5,000 of the business account, 2, $500 each. I'm that 2500. I'm stingy with it. Like, oh, okay, Give my mama a couple hundred. Get my sister. Ah. Nothing else. You know what I'm saying? But like, if it's 5,000 in a business account and we had a bar, we like get this shots on us. Like, it's not the same money. Like, we went, we did the Chicago show and all the money we earned from the Chicago show, we spent it on shots for the people that came to the Chicago, but we gave it right back to the fans. And who the are we?

[Pat]

Well, we, we already went into this and we weren't trying to make money. We're trying to make an experience. Never again, though.

[Mike]

No, no, I'm sorry. Chicago. I know Chicago very spoiled. As far as like the mixer thing. We are not doing a mixer. That was like a one time thing. Maybe we'll slide off.

[Pat]

That was more of a celebration for us doing our first live show.

[Carrie]

They'll love you forever, though.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

Yes. Those people experience.

[Pat]

Yeah, we locked it. We like ig friends with some of you.

[Mike]

No, we follow like at least like 20 of them. Like, we real cool. I'm investing in some of their lives. Some of y' all making crazy ass mistakes like you, you need to lead that.

[Pat]

But that's another crazy mistakes. But you're not cool enough with them to like call them out on it.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah. Like brush. Should I leave him? I'll be like, come on, put the voting poll up so I can vote on this. You click on some shit like, yes. And then you see that shit. Only 19%. I know. We like this chat. Yeah. Okay. The shade room back in. I'm not fucking with the shade room no more. I guess I really never was. But like, I don't like the way they put information out. Instead I like, if you're going to be nasty, be all the way nasty. I would appreciate that a lot more. They, they had like a tweet about 21 Savage and said, Roomies, did you know 21 Savage is already a boy and girl dad. Here's everything to know about his three kids, plus their moms.

[Carrie]

That's so messy.

[Mike]

That is crazy. That is so crazy. To like, to me, like, to even make. If someone is famous, to make an article about any family. Family member that's also not trying to pursue being famous. It's crazy. Like, okay, if my cousin a rapper, and then the Shade Room pick. Let's say we got the biggest podcast in the world and my cousin's a rapper, he do something dumb in the Shade Room, pick it up, so be it.

[Pat]

Like, yeah.

[Mike]

And they was trying to pursue something, but to, like, go after, like, my sister or something like that, that doesn't have anything. And then, like, to make an article about them is, like, crazy.

[Pat]

What's in the name? So I feel like people go there

[Carrie]

for that, but it's like, they could have been. Did that. And I'm sure they've done it before. It's just the timing now because of this whole lotto situation.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Carrie]

That's why everybody is on my girl.

[Pat]

A lot of people I've seen. It was a meme about, like, I've seen y' all congrats. A lot of more on the pregnancy than y' all did. Y'.

[Mike]

All.

[Pat]

Y' all actual friends. But people were kind of getting on like, her for, like, 21 savage thing.

[Mike]

Yeah. And I think because she. Her big thing was like, oh, she doesn't have a high body count. Yeah. And then she used to make fun of people for being just a baby mama and, like, that.

[Carrie]

She never really made fun of people. She mentioned it like, you know, the big mama, no kids. Everybody liked that line. But I don't think she ever was, like, going in on people who was just a baby mama.

[Mike]

No, no, no, I get that. But I believe that's all rappers, though. Like, Jeezy rap about selling coke. And then the son, smart as hell, damn near valedictorian. So it's just like, you had me ready out here to bust some bricks down. You'll sound good at a college education. So it's just like, I feel like, as a rapper, you gotta kind of contradict yourself because there's no way you could be living your life.

[Carrie]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And we've seen what happened when rappers live their life.

[Pat]

I also heard that. That the reason why 21 doesn't really show his face in the pictures with her is because he's still legally married, in a sense, and for citizenship reasons. And allegedly. Allegedly. And if he does show his face in it. It does kind of when you're kind of going through the green card process, that can kind of, like, mess with it because so he kind of has his way out no matter what.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's true.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Got a good exit plan, too. Yeah.

[Carrie]

I just wonder how long they can go without being seen together yet. We have not seen them together, not one time. It's like, now you got a whole kid.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Nobody's got to be.

[Pat]

Yeah. You got to be at that.

[Mike]

Yeah. I just sent you a video. Since we own celebrity relationships, the goat celebrity relationship, to me is Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith like this. I don't think that that's literally the best relationship that we've ever had on the Internet ever. They give us something every single year.

[Carrie]

Like, so you just want to be entertained.

[Mike]

Yes.

[Guest Rapper]

Okay.

[Mike]

This video, I think, is like, if her and Will Smith.

[Pat]

Will. She says Jada Pickett Smith speaks on whether she'll ever let her husband, Will Smith, move back in with her.

[Mike]

Are y' all living together?

[Listener Guest]

It's just this beautiful connection.

[Carrie]

We will look at that.

[Mike]

Not right now, but you will. Yeah.

[Carrie]

Oh, yeah.

[Mike]

That's.

[Carrie]

Why do you say that with such a clarity?

[Mike]

Because that's what it's gonna be. That's where it's headed.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And you both are on that page.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And, you know, but right now, I really do enjoy my space.

[Listener Guest]

You know, I've been living.

[Carrie]

Hello.

[Mike]

I am my mother's only child.

[Listener Guest]

Right.

[Mike]

And so having this time that I've

[Carrie]

had to myself has been fantastic.

[Pat]

Just to get to know me, you

[Mike]

know, even to have my house exactly

[Listener Guest]

how I want it.

[Mike]

I don't have to be like, well,

[Listener Guest]

what color do you want this ball?

[Mike]

You know what I mean?

[Pat]

I can just do it.

[Guest Rapper]

You're the chooser.

[Mike]

I'm the chooser? You're the chooser.

[Carrie]

So when you imagine your back together,

[Mike]

because I'm sure you've seen it, how

[Carrie]

does that look to you?

[Mike]

We don't know yet.

[Pat]

I'm not all the way mad at that, though. I feel like people in her position, they're both famous in their own right. Obviously, Will Smith is. I would say Will Smith is more famous. But if you can afford to live apart and that works for y', all, I'm. I. I don't see a big problem. What do you think?

[Carrie]

So let me get this straight. They got. I remember before, it was two separate wings of the house. Now they just got two separate houses?

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Carrie]

I mean, I don't think they like each Other.

[Mike]

That's what I'm getting at, too.

[Carrie]

I don't think they want to be around each other.

[Pat]

It's like a soul tie.

[Mike]

It gotta be something like, I think maybe for the kids, so the kids can see them both at the same time. I just don't like when people, like, make statements like that and they don't, like, put it out there as, like, hey, the other person could be thinking like this too. You know what I'm saying? Like, oh, I want my space. I want my space. All she had to do was say, and Will probably wants his space too. Yeah. And that would kind of make it even.

[Pat]

And it says, like, move in with her.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

It's just like the title did. At least.

[Mike]

Title did. But, like, sometimes, like, I feel like when people make statements, which I feel like she has in the past, and like, other people having a relationship, it almost puts, like, Will Smith into, like, this. It's like the same thing Aisha Curry did.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

It's just like, it almost puts them into, like, damn, does this person have control in their relationship?

[Pat]

It's like the person I really like demasculates them and stuff, like. Or is it emascular or demas. Emasculate.

[Mike]

Demasculate. I don't know.

[Pat]

I guess I think it's emasculate.

[Mike]

Like, come on. Espanol over there said pesos.

[Carrie]

N. That is interesting, though. A whole of, like, two separate houses. I don't know. I think that's kind of crazy.

[Pat]

I feel like it makes sense for them, though, because their relationship was already kind of weird and just different than the traditional relationship. So that's just a non traditional way of their living. And they can afford to do that.

[Mike]

Yes. And I don't. And also, like, with them, obviously, she's making, like, headlines. I don't know if that's part of their ploy, though. You know what I mean? I could definitely see that because having us talk about it anytime. Jada, say something about Will and make the news. The same thing with Aisha.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And Steph, maybe they having those conversations, like, yo, I'm about to say this about you because I'm also selling this book. So I'm about to tell them, you don't be wiping the toilet seat. You cool with that? Wow.

[Carrie]

Just room for more entanglements.

[Pat]

I feel like they had that exactly, didn't they? They had the open relationship.

[Mike]

You need.

[Pat]

You need separate houses for that.

[Carrie]

It went from separate wings.

[Mike]

Wow, man. Some.

[Pat]

If you. If you're having an open relationship, and you can afford it. I would. I would get separate houses.

[Mike]

I just would never do an open relationship because it's just like. Like I already don't. I really don't with a lot of dudes. Right. And then like now like, this person has basically all this access to me. It's like an open relationship is different from like your ex moving on because, like, you're. The woman is still actively coming back, getting information from me. Maybe we're still hooking up. And then you're going to pillow talk with the other dudes. You're getting current information. Yeah. And you're giving it to this dude now. Like, we supposed to be cool too. It's just like, like, I don't know, man. Somebody gotta die. Can only be one, maybe one of us. My. Okay, I ain't gonna lie. I've been looking for the best deal to find Cardi B tickets because I just saw some highlights and all I gotta say is I love her music, so. Which is I want to thank the sponsor of today's video, SeatGeek. It's a huge shout out to them. With over 35 million downloads, SeatGeek is a number one rated ticketing app.

[Pat]

There are more than 70, 000 listed events on SeatGeek, including sports festivals and more. I love using SeatGeek. Like Pat said, we're looking forward to finding the Cardi B ticket, so. And find the best seats possible.

[Mike]

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[Pat]

That's 10 off any ticket with promo code. Dummies10. Make sure to click the link in the description to download the app and have the code automatically added to your account so you can use it later. Thank you to SeatGeek for supporting the podcast. And we're gonna get those Cardi b tickets.

[Mike]

Yo, let's take a quick break to thank today's sponsor of the podcast. Earning. Y' all see them long airport lines? I don't like waiting. And when earning, you ain't gotta wait.

[Pat]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

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[Mike]

Fees expedited transfers available for a fee. Tips are voluntary and don't affect the service. Available in select states. Terms and restrictions apply. Visit earning.com for full details. Now back to the pod.

[Listener Guest]

Hello.

[Pat]

Hello.

[Mike]

Hello. Oh, go ahead, G.

[Pat]

Talk to her. Gene.

[Mike]

The one that is ctm.

[Listener Guest]

I don't. I'm not Spanish.

[Mike]

Okay, I knew. I knew she was right. I knew she was running out of vocab as soon as I heard that second sentence. I asked her where she from. She said, good.

[Listener Guest]

No, I didn't hear that. Oh, where am I from? I'm from New Jersey, but I live in Greensboro, North Carolina.

[Mike]

Okay. Okay. You come to the New York show, right?

[Listener Guest]

No, I'm going to Charlotte.

[Mike]

Oh, you going to the Charlotte show?

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, I'm in North Carolina now, so I'll be at the Charlotte show.

[Mike]

Oh. Type shit.

[Pat]

Raleigh, too.

[Mike]

See you soon.

[Pat]

But Raleigh?

[Listener Guest]

See, y' all dropped that after Charlotte, and Raleigh would have been better, but I already got my ticket for Charlotte.

[Mike]

I know. Slide to Charlotte, bro. We gonna. We got it.

[Pat]

We got to go to both. What's the strangest thing that you've ever spent your money on?

[Listener Guest]

Okay. When I was in high school, I had a boyfriend and he was lacking funds. He wasn't in school, so he was able to work. I was the one in school, and he was lacking funds, and I paid for his jewelry for my promotion, and the necklace was quite expensive. And that was the strangest or dumbest thing I've ever spent my money on. Ever since then, I've been very stingy when it came to my money and men.

[Mike]

Damn, you based Your whole life off one interaction. Okay, how much did the necklace cost?

[Listener Guest]

That's what men do.

[Mike]

Yeah, I mean, yeah. I mean, you gonna say, oh, I got a flaw, but everybody else got a flaw too. How much.

[Pat]

The money thing's not a flaw, huh?

[Mike]

Yes, it is a flaw if she's stingy for the rest of her life because of one.

[Listener Guest]

Like, no, no, no, no, no. That was like over. That was like 10 years ago. But now, like in my older years, like, I've spent money on my, like my boyfriend now. So, you know, money's. But it took a long time to get there. Everybody in between, they anything out of me. No money, no nothing.

[Mike]

You just have to find the right one and trick on well, how much.

[Listener Guest]

And they even tricked the discreet. How much was the necklace?

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Listener Guest]

It was like now we're thinking like 2017 high school years. I'm. I'm working at Wendy's. So this was a lot back then.

[Mike]

Okay, that's four for four.

[Listener Guest]

It was like 1500.

[Pat]

God damn, that's a lot.

[Mike]

Now hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. What? Like, how much is a four for four right now? What was a four for four? It's like a biggie bag now or something.

[Pat]

What do you mean? How much is the four for four?

[Mike]

Yeah. Oh,

[Listener Guest]

Do they even have. But then again, I think also what was. And not. Okay, not too much.

[Mike]

I actually wanted to Google like the taxes and. But that's still stupid.

[Listener Guest]

Listen, hear me out. And then there's within that same relationship, just probably like a month afterwards. Graduation. My brother had gave me graduation but money. And I let him flex on the ground with my money. And I also like my. My graduation dinner. To make it look like he paid. I slid him some money so it could look like he paid for a

[Pat]

girl was in love in high school.

[Mike]

You didn't hold it down. Like, where, where. What is he doing now? Do you have you kept tabs on him?

[Listener Guest]

I don't know.

[Mike]

You don't even know, huh?

[Listener Guest]

Like, we, we. We're like, we're mutual. But I like, I know of him. Like, I don't keep tabs. Like, oh my God, what you're doing today. Like, how's life?

[Pat]

No, not those type of tabs. Just like what he's doing. Just like what he's doing in life. Like, how's his life going?

[Listener Guest]

It seems like it's going good.

[Mike]

Okay, maybe he needs a little money for a little startup. You know what I'm saying?

[Listener Guest]

The dumbest I've ever done. Yes.

[Mike]

The 1500 necklace. He still got to have that somewhere. Like, that's just not something.

[Pat]

That's not a cheap nec.

[Mike]

Yeah, it's not something you lose over the years.

[Listener Guest]

I'm not gonna lie. He probably pawned it because life was rough, so he probably bonded. But after that, like, literally fourth of July, he. He broke up with me, so.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Oh, damn.

[Mike]

Real fireworks. What?

[Listener Guest]

Literally May, June, July.

[Mike]

What? What's the most expensive thing you bought? Your current boyfriend?

[Listener Guest]

We've been together. Well, we just broke up, but we've been together for, like, a little minute, so I don't. It's like, things over the course of the time.

[Mike]

Why y' all break up?

[Listener Guest]

Huh?

[Mike]

Why y' all break up?

[Listener Guest]

Why? Or when?

[Mike]

Why then?

[Listener Guest]

When we listen to y' all together. So he'll be listening to this.

[Mike]

I mean, it's too late. You already talking about another. You already done pissed him off.

[Pat]

Y' all might. I might get back together.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, no, definitely. We might. Like, we definitely might. So it's not. It's really not. No, it's like, y' all come to

[Pat]

the live show together. We'll get y' all back together.

[Mike]

Hell no. I'm gonna make it worse.

[Listener Guest]

I'm gonna make y' all be at the live stream.

[Mike]

I'm gonna make y'.

[Guest Rapper]

All.

[Pat]

Hey, whoever her boyfriend is, come to live show, too.

[Mike]

I'm gonna make y' all switch phones at the live show, though.

[Listener Guest]

Oh, I mean, that's fine. Like, we could do that.

[Mike]

That's what the problem is right there. I knew it. I knew it. It's. It's something in his phone.

[Listener Guest]

No, it's nothing in his phone.

[Pat]

No, y' all seriously, pull up the. Y' all should pull up the live show. We can talk about this on stage.

[Listener Guest]

I got my ticket.

[Pat]

Okay? Hey.

[Mike]

Hey, look, she. She tired of paying for. I said I got my. I done.

[Pat]

Hey, man, him come to the live show.

[Mike]

Come to the live show, Brody, no.

[Listener Guest]

It's on a. It's on a Wednesday.

[Pat]

Okay, what does that mean?

[Mike]

She got her ticket.

[Listener Guest]

Everybody can't make it. He lives, like, towards the Raleigh area, so he.

[Pat]

He don't know what he can make and what. He don't come to the show.

[Mike]

Come to the show where we putting her next to another.

[Pat]

We'll give you a free ticket to the show if he comes to the show. Tell him to come to the show. We'll give you a free ticket, bro. Not you, but the. The guy.

[Listener Guest]

Are y' all sure? Because I'll Let him know right now.

[Mike]

Yeah, tell him, tell him, tell him.

[Pat]

But y' all have to come. Y' all gonna come together, though, and we're gonna pick on y'.

[Guest Rapper]

All.

[Pat]

So just letting y' all know how he.

[Listener Guest]

How he gonna get his free ticket, then.

[Mike]

He just gotta DM us. It'll be at will call.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

Or we could just, like, we. We control the venue.

[Listener Guest]

Because I heard with my set, like, y' all not gonna pick on us.

[Pat]

Not pick. Not pick on you. But we want. We don't want. We just want to dissect y' all situation out for content.

[Listener Guest]

I'll. I'll do. I'll see what. I'll allow y' all to dissect.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

Okay. Yeah, you can. You can literally tell it. Like, we could be like, yo, where you at? And then you raise your hand and be like, yo, how your day going? And then you could just be like, no, I'm not with y'.

[Guest Rapper]

All.

[Mike]

We just be like, all right, we'll move on. That's just the risk we taking right now. But best believe, if y' all don't say nothing, we kicking. Both of y'. All.

[Listener Guest]

You're not kicking me out. I paid for my ticket.

[Mike]

Whatever. Whatever. Security.

[Pat]

All right, you have a good one.

[Listener Guest]

Hi.

[Mike]

Happy International Woman Century Decade Day.

[Listener Guest]

Thanks. Thank you.

[Mike]

She said thank you.

[Listener Guest]

Thank you so much.

[Mike]

You're welcome. Has anybody told you that lately?

[Listener Guest]

No, actually.

[Mike]

Okay. I'm glad you got it from us.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, me too.

[Mike]

All three of us.

[Pat]

All right. What's the strangest thing you've ever spent money on?

[Listener Guest]

I paid an Etsy witch to do witchcraft on my ex.

[Pat]

They have witches on Etsy?

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, they have everything on Etsy.

[Pat]

So was it, like, making, like, the. Like, a voodoo doll?

[Listener Guest]

No, I don't know what she did. I just paid her to do what she does. I don't know.

[Mike]

On your eggs? You didn't even. You didn't even check in to, like, what she was actually doing?

[Listener Guest]

No, I didn't care. Like, what.

[Mike]

What did you ask her to do?

[Listener Guest]

Just to ruin his life. I feel like he ruined mine.

[Mike]

So did it work?

[Listener Guest]

It was his turn. I think it did, actually.

[Mike]

What happened in his life?

[Listener Guest]

I think it worked well. He played basketball. Like, D1 basketball. He kept having a transfer, like, he was on the bench. He went broke. He even called me one day and asked me for money. So I'm like, oh, this gotta be working, bro. This nigga's life is in shambles, and I'm watching it unfold. So it had to be working.

[Pat]

What'd he do to you?

[Listener Guest]

He just was not a good person. And he cheated on me a whole bunch of times.

[Mike]

So you wanted.

[Listener Guest]

I guess maybe it was my fault.

[Mike]

Why was it? Why you say that?

[Listener Guest]

Because I kept taking him back after he cheated.

[Mike]

So what was the final straw?

[Carrie]

I went to see him one time and there was another girl as his lock screen.

[Listener Guest]

And yeah, that was it for me.

[Mike]

That's his lock screen.

[Guest Rapper]

Oh my God.

[Mike]

He didn't even care about you enough to change his lock screen. He said.

[Listener Guest]

Exactly, that's what I'm saying.

[Carrie]

Like he went to the bathroom, left his.

[Listener Guest]

Maybe he did it on purpose. He went to the bathroom, left his phone sitting on his bed. I clicked it it and it was another girl.

[Mike]

On purpose for sure. On purpose.

[Pat]

He could have did. Easy now. You could do a little swiping thing now.

[Mike]

Yeah, you can change it. He could have changed it.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah. So it was on purpose. It was on purpose.

[Mike]

Oh, that's crazy.

[Pat]

When you went to Etsy to look for the witch, what was your like criteria you're looking for? Cuz obviously you put it into like the search bar.

[Listener Guest]

I seen it on. I seen people talking about Etsy witches on Tik Tok and I just, just commented like which one is the best one. And everybody was sending me the same

[Carrie]

girl, so I just paid her.

[Mike]

Oh, that's. That's crazy one. Send her link to the dms.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, I will.

[Mike]

I'm just letting you know when you. When you open yourself up to. To witchcraft, you opening it up to be done back to you.

[Listener Guest]

I know. So it's okay.

[Mike]

I'm about to see if this really work.

[Carrie]

Are you gonna do witchcraft on me?

[Pat]

Hey man, I wonder what the same people use the witchcraft on each other.

[Mike]

That's what I'm saying. Do it cancel out?

[Listener Guest]

I don't know.

[Carrie]

Maybe.

[Pat]

Does he know you did this to him?

[Listener Guest]

No, he doesn't even know.

[Mike]

Okay, what's what?

[Listener Guest]

Okay, hopefully he doesn't find out.

[Mike]

Okay, what's your last message to him? Because it sound like you're still not over this.

[Listener Guest]

I am over it. I. I just hope his life keeps failing.

[Mike]

That's kind of crazy.

[Listener Guest]

Honestly, like, how.

[Mike]

How old are you?

[Listener Guest]

24.

[Mike]

24? When. When did this happen?

[Listener Guest]

Maybe like it had to be like three or four years ago.

[Mike]

Hey, you gotta let it go. I ain't gonna lie.

[Listener Guest]

I can't.

[Mike]

Why you can't let it go? You ain't found a new man?

[Listener Guest]

No, I. I do have a boyfriend, but I just feel like when people do me wrong, like, I have to. Like, I just can't. Like, I just can't let that slide.

[Pat]

Does your boyfriend know about this?

[Listener Guest]

No.

[Pat]

So he doesn't even know, like, there's a threat that if he's not good to you. Yeah, he doesn't know.

[Listener Guest]

Exactly. He doesn't even know. So let's hope he keeps up the good work because he can be next.

[Mike]

You know what? You know what? You're the best.

[Listener Guest]

Thanks.

[Mike]

You're welcome. I. I don't know what these two other think about you, but I think you're awesome.

[Listener Guest]

Thank you. I think so, too.

[Mike]

I really like her. Like, I just feel like we just vibe and we'd be best friends. I feel like she always gonna look out for me.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, I will. I'll do witchcraft on somebody for y'. All.

[Mike]

Okay. Appreciate it. It. All right.

[Guest Rapper]

You're welcome. Okay.

[Mike]

There's this DJ in Cleveland that. No, didn't let me in, man.

[Pat]

All right, you have a good one.

[Listener Guest]

I got you.

[Guest Rapper]

Oh, thank you.

[Listener Guest]

Y' all, too.

[Pat]

All right.

[Guest Rapper]

Y. Yo, yo, yo. What's good with y?

[Pat]

What up? What up?

[Mike]

Sound like he in a Transformer. Say what's up. Optimus.

[Guest Rapper]

N. Real you.

[Pat]

You a truck driver?

[Guest Rapper]

Hell, yeah.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah. You on that road?

[Pat]

You.

[Mike]

You a long distance, truck driver? Short distance.

[Guest Rapper]

I run the whole east coast. You feel me?

[Mike]

East Coast. East coast. You married?

[Guest Rapper]

Hell, no.

[Mike]

Okay, good, good. You know better, huh?

[Pat]

In the relationship?

[Guest Rapper]

Nah, my just left me yesterday.

[Pat]

Oh, damn.

[Mike]

I see why. All right, come on.

[Pat]

I got a question for you. What was your worst purchase that you ever made?

[Guest Rapper]

All right, so look, I was in high school and a downtown in Baltimore. He had all, like, the fake Louis. Fake Gucci, and the. Had the Louis V condom. Ain't never had that. You feel me?

[Pat]

Did you use it?

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, but I used it on the wrong joint, though. You feel me?

[Pat]

What do you mean?

[Guest Rapper]

Like? Like, raw is law. Don't get it twisted, right?

[Listener Guest]

Yeah,

[Guest Rapper]

I go raw and all the bad joints, but it was just one sketchy joint. And I was like, damn, only got one rubber. That joke was $70, you feel me?

[Mike]

And I used to what did the condom. Because I'm sure the packaging was Louis V. Like, what did the actual condom look like?

[Guest Rapper]

It was just a regular rubber.

[Mike]

It ain't had a monogram on it?

[Guest Rapper]

No. Hell, no. But the package had the monogram. So, like, you know, I mean, you know, high school, you know, I mean, like, you gotta rather I'd be like, yeah. And I pull out that Louis V joint, don't put it on, throw it back in the wallet. She'll be like, oh, you know what I mean?

[Mike]

And then you have sex raw. You bought the condom as an accessory. Like, yeah, I could you with the designer as like, yes, yes, yes. I feel like the CIA does a very good job.

[Pat]

Like, what was your other answer?

[Guest Rapper]

I'm a joint. I bought a fake record deal, man, during company, you know what I'm saying? A was rapping and a hit me in my DM talking about, man, I got connections. I can get you signed. I was like, oh, this is my big break, yo. Yo seemed official. He sent me a whole email. He was like, yeah, I can get your to little Uzi, the Uzi producer. I can get your shoot to his dj. His dj. Oh, you gotta do a sign with me. But to sign with me, I need 1200. I was like, 1200? That's crazy.

[Listener Guest]

I mean,

[Guest Rapper]

yeah, I said that.

[Mike]

Like, how much. How much music did you have out before that? Like, were you a well known rapper before that?

[Guest Rapper]

I mean, I was well known in the area, but the area wasn't too big.

[Mike]

You feel me?

[Pat]

10 by 10.

[Mike]

That went triple platinum in the lunch break room

[Pat]

that ran the cul de

[Mike]

sac everybody talking about, man. Man, play that one again, bro. I got y', all, bro.

[Pat]

Oh, man, when you find out it was a scam

[Guest Rapper]

after my ain't blow up and I ain't hear from that again. I said that 1200. I was telling him back. I was like, yeah, so little Uzi DJ gonna play my right? My back.

[Mike]

Tell me this tape ain't fall out your pocket, Skinny.

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, type.

[Mike]

Type. Where the song at?

[Guest Rapper]

I mean, everywhere. All my. All my shit's still on Apple music, still on YouTube.

[Pat]

And what's the song that you thought that little Uzi was gonna hop on or. Or play?

[Guest Rapper]

Oh, my. Is called Nasty.

[Pat]

Nasty by who?

[Guest Rapper]

By me. FBE Messy.

[Pat]

FBE Messy.

[Mike]

Messy, yeah, like m e S Y or ssi n?

[Guest Rapper]

Like. Like the soccer player.

[Mike]

Okay, that's tough. I with that.

[Pat]

Hold on, let me see.

[Mike]

Not nasty we could work on, but I with the messy.

[Pat]

Wait, what's it called?

[Guest Rapper]

Is it done?

[Pat]

Filthy Party. You got some interesting song upset that's not on YouTube.

[Guest Rapper]

You don't see nasty on there.

[Pat]

Hold on.

[Mike]

Nah, bro, it's way far down the algorithm we scrolling though. Yeah, you got black. We about to get to it.

[Pat]

I see. I see it.

[Mike]

About five more scrolls. We've been to that

[Guest Rapper]

on my right past the Messy. Highlights.

[Mike]

Hold on. Okay. To lie.

[Pat]

Let me call back.

[Mike]

Let me call back. No, I'm not going to lie. Hold on, hold on.

[Guest Rapper]

Hey, I like D. No, no, we

[Pat]

have to listen to the song.

[Mike]

Hey man, that the, the song. Not bad. I'm not going to lie. Like with the right, with the right audience and stuff, with the right music video, like I could see that being like a tik tok trend or something. If that get, if that get to the right DJs, you know what I'm saying? Like if Uzi heard that, yeah,

[Guest Rapper]

I'd have been shoulder rolling on.

[Mike]

I'm not gonna lie, bro. If you send us 1200 right now, we. We got you, bro. We'll pay. We get this to Jay Z DJ immediately.

[Guest Rapper]

All right.

[Mike]

Get ready to throw up the rock.

[Pat]

We got you,

[Mike]

ho.

[Pat]

Oh man.

[Mike]

Oh, definitely going to hear this one though.

[Pat]

That was funny.

[Mike]

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[Pat]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

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[Mike]

Yo, let's take a quick break to thank the sponsor of today's episode, GLD I. Come on fellas, let's be real. Buying men's jewelry used to be a nightmare. It was low quality junk that snapped after a week or it was insanely overpriced with. Or it was insanely overpriced with ridiculous markups.

[Pat]

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[Mike]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

that's 50 off a cold crash gld.com after you purchase or ask where you heard about them, please support our show and tell them that we sent you. Now back to the pod. Why you got your camera on?

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, I'm on the way. I was just, I was just listening to y'.

[Listener Guest]

All.

[Guest Rapper]

When I went to sleep, I took a nap and I was inside the date night one.

[Mike]

Oh, the dating show?

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, like y' all did like the date show, like the three fat guys and y' all like bullying like a little Mexican dude.

[Mike]

I don't know. That was some tubi he was watching. Yeah, he had a dream about that.

[Pat]

I got a question for you. What's the strangest thing you spend money on?

[Guest Rapper]

All right, so I was, I answered the question. I was with my girl, but it was like, y' all know what Spencer's is?

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Pat]

To be in the mall.

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, so like, yeah, like you go to the mall, you go to Spencer's. They got all like the freaky stuff in there, right? So like we, me and her, we went in Spencer's and she was like trying to get me to buy this shirt because she was buying like a. A rose toy. So I was like, all right, cool. So then I go in the back and there's like all like he's like these, like, I don't even know what you want to call them, like, dildos and stuff like that, all the freaky stuff. And then she saw it as like Harry Potter butt plug she wanted me to buy. And she was like, do you want it? And I was like, you can buy it from. If you want me to. So now I got a Voldemort butt plug sit in my room for. Hello.

[Mike]

For who?

[Guest Rapper]

Like, like, just, like, just, just so, like, just for. Like, it's not for anybody.

[Pat]

Like, I'm not going to use it like decoration there.

[Mike]

Is yours?

[Guest Rapper]

I guess. Yeah. Like, it's just sitting there. Like.

[Mike]

I'm just saying. Does she use butt plugs?

[Guest Rapper]

Not to my knowledge.

[Mike]

So you bought a butt plug and it's at your place?

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah, well, no, she bought it for me, but I'm not. I don't use it. Hello?

[Pat]

You don't find it weird that she bought you a butt plug?

[Guest Rapper]

No, like, she be doing that stuff all the time. Like, she just be like, joke on me and stuff.

[Mike]

Name some other jokes.

[Pat]

Joking until you agree to do it.

[Guest Rapper]

I mean, I'm not. I'm not too surprised. Like, she'd be doing stuff like that all the time.

[Mike]

Let's hear, let's hear. Like, what's some other ones?

[Guest Rapper]

Like, some other weird stuff she's done. I mean, she, like, has, like some handcuffs, like some glittery handcuffs.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Guest Rapper]

Like that type of stuff.

[Mike]

Okay, we got handcuffs, butt plug. What else?

[Pat]

Have you guys used the handcuffs?

[Guest Rapper]

Have we. Yeah, we use them once.

[Pat]

Okay, so that's one item you use. Okay.

[Mike]

Just got this butt plug.

[Pat]

Yeah, she got. Joke about it little bit more. I tell you, be like, I'm down.

[Mike]

No, you. You going to be naked one day and she going to push you on the couch like, oh,

[Guest Rapper]

let me. My friend, My friend. He was just saying that.

[Mike]

No, that. That got a spell up his booty. Now he going to be riding. You know how they ride broomsticks? He gonna be riding it the other way. No. What, Whatever. No, no, no, no. What other gifts they gave you?

[Guest Rapper]

Whatever she gave me. Yeah, I mean, that's like. That's kind of like the. Nor, like, not normal, but like, that's like. I feel like other people do that stuff, though. Like, I'm not the only one. You know what I mean?

[Mike]

You're the only person I've ever heard of this girlfriend buying him a butt plug. And neither one of you guys use a butt plug club.

[Guest Rapper]

But I mean, like, it's just. Just for. I Mean, what? Let me think about something else.

[Listener Guest]

She's.

[Guest Rapper]

Bobby's like, oh, she did give me a shirt. It says I love porn on it.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's.

[Pat]

That's another thing.

[Guest Rapper]

She got me.

[Mike]

Something's going down, bro.

[Pat]

We don't know what it is yet, bro, but she's cooking up something.

[Guest Rapper]

My friend, he was like. Like, one day she was gonna, like, drug me, and then, like, you know,

[Pat]

I wouldn't go that far.

[Guest Rapper]

I doubt it, though. See, see, that's. That's wifey, though. Like, we're locked in.

[Mike]

Yeah, you're about to be locked in for real.

[Pat]

Yeah. I don't know, bro. Yeah, she. But, yeah, protect yourself, bro.

[Guest Rapper]

I. I will. You know how I get down.

[Pat]

Hey, by the by, what you've told us, I really do not. I'm a little confused. But, hey, 2026, we not judging.

[Mike]

No, we're not judging you, bro.

[Pat]

Everybody has their own kinks.

[Mike]

Yeah. That butt plug not there for no reason.

[Guest Rapper]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Y' all doing a show in Atlanta, right?

[Pat]

Yeah. You coming?

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah.

[Listener Guest]

I'mma pull up.

[Pat]

All right. Just don't bring the p. Butt plug. Leave that at.

[Guest Rapper]

I'mma pull up.

[Mike]

All right, now. He didn't deny it. That's your new nickname.

[Pat]

Like, y' all sign it.

[Mike]

No, that Baltimore plus, that's crazy, huh? No, no, I was literally. I would. I would legit slap the out. I'm not even.

[Pat]

All right, bro. You have a good one, man.

[Guest Rapper]

All right. Wait, am I. Is this going be the podcast?

[Mike]

We don't know, man. You just make sure that butt plug stay unused.

[Guest Rapper]

Maybe all you guys. I got you.

[Pat]

I got you.

[Mike]

I got you.

[Pat]

Hello, Hello, Hello.

[Listener Guest]

Hi, guys.

[Mike]

What up? What up? Welcome to Crash Dummies podcast, episode 251, with your host, Mike Pat. Oh, it's 252.

[Pat]

Oh, no. 1.

[Mike]

Also, you just corrected me.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

In front of the ladies for nothing. That's cool.

[Pat]

Anyhow, Pat has a question for you, actually.

[Listener Guest]

Okay.

[Mike]

Oh, is this my question? So then you're trying to, like, power trip in front of her, too?

[Pat]

No, I was just.

[Mike]

I'm just saying, you're just being real weird because you weren't having this energy before she got on the phone.

[Pat]

That's true, man.

[Mike]

I just, like. But it's just like, you doing this in front of her for what?

[Pat]

I'm just saying, bro, Just give me that money you owe me.

[Listener Guest]

I'm just trying to answer the question. Whatever y' all got for me.

[Pat]

No, Pat actually owed me some money, so that's kind of like.

[Mike]

That means he has 10 bands. I told you, I got that 10 times over.

[Listener Guest]

You better pay up.

[Mike]

All right, let's get this started so I can hop in my helicopter and leave. All right. What was your I don't give a fuck moment? I'm sorry, I guess I could isolate that. What was your I don't give a fuck moment?

[Listener Guest]

When I posted my ex on the T app? So basically, I was just trying to get information, like, oh, who else is messing with this guy? Because, like, at the time, he wasn't even my man anymore. But, like, I just fucked him. So I was like, who else is he fucking around with? And, like, my post got blown up, and they were like, oh, like, three other girls posted him. And so, like, I went into the other girl's comments, and I was like, oh, hey. So, like, I literally just fucked him, FYI. And she was like, oh, no. Like, he's my man. Like, you're a bird, bitch. And I was like,

[Mike]

you're a bird, bitch.

[Pat]

That's what you get.

[Mike]

You thought you had girls, girl. They could beat you on the tv.

[Listener Guest]

I was trying to be a girls, girl.

[Mike]

Nah.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah. Like, I was like, I'm trying to be a girls girl. And, like, I'm just letting you know. And she's like, no, you're just a bird. You just want him back. And I'm like, he was literally just over here last week. What do you mean?

[Pat]

I guess he's not wrong, though.

[Mike]

No, it sound like you. I don't like the way you talking right now. You're supposed to be like, girl, both of us got played. That's how you really get under their skin. You don't, like, go back and forth and be like, he was just over there. He did that. Like, no, he's both of us also.

[Pat]

You're not. You guys weren't. You guys weren't together at the time, right?

[Listener Guest]

No, we had just, like, hooked back up. But, like, we were, like, like, still, like, talking and things. But little did I know this guy had things going on with other women, too.

[Pat]

And I was like, but y' all weren't exclusive, though.

[Listener Guest]

Well, in my eyes, like, delusion. Right.

[Mike]

Okay, so you admit that you're a little delusional at this point.

[Listener Guest]

A little. But I mean, like, we kind of talk things out a little bit.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah. Talk things out. Oh, so you let him back in again?

[Listener Guest]

Yeah. So, yeah, I'll admit I was dumb. And then it was funny, too. Because, like, like, she, like, texted him off, like, a fake number. And so he called me and, like, accused me of, like, texting him and doing all this stuff, and I cussed him out, and I was like, f you. That's not even me. And I just came in the house and it was hot as, and I had groceries, so I was like, how the I'm gonna text you. I have groceries in my hand. What the is this about?

[Mike]

No, that's crazy. He don't even know who it is. That's crazy. You got so many women. Be like, who is it? What are you with me?

[Pat]

What'd you post on the T app, though? Like, because you might. Were you lying?

[Listener Guest]

Oh, no, I wasn't lying. I told the truth. I was like, yo, just want to know. Like, I at least said, like, it was my situationship, because I didn't want to say, like, my man, because, like, at least I'll admit I was delusional. So I was like, let me just say situation, because that's what it was.

[Mike]

Okay. What's your relationship like? No,

[Listener Guest]

well, I don't talk to him. That was like, last year, so.

[Mike]

No, just like, overall, like.

[Listener Guest]

Like, oh, there's somebody in my life. Shout out to him, though. He's a real one. I love him. Down.

[Mike]

This your boyfriend? Is it official?

[Listener Guest]

No, we're not official. We're just dating.

[Pat]

So he's really sweet.

[Mike]

That's where you. I mean, you gotta learn your lesson from the last time.

[Pat]

You gotta define it at the beginning. All these little love lightning.

[Listener Guest]

No, so we. We. We definitely define things. But definitely, like, that TF died down, so definitely. Probably wouldn't post anybody again because I don't want to get sued.

[Mike]

It's a Facebook. You gonna post this?

[Listener Guest]

Dude, it probably not.

[Mike]

So you don't care. You just don't want to find out. He. He just that good of a man. You don't care what he doing?

[Listener Guest]

No, not really.

[Pat]

That's fair. Okay. All right.

[Mike]

Honestly, delusional. We love it.

[Guest Rapper]

I'll admit it.

[Listener Guest]

At least I'm not, like, I'm not going to beat around the bush. I was delusional.

[Pat]

Oh, it's fine. How old were you when that happened?

[Listener Guest]

I was. Was 20. I just turned 26.

[Pat]

Okay. Frontal lobe was still developing.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah, a little bit. Just a little. I mean, he was pretty stupid. And then I was stupid again because I let him back in.

[Pat]

And then, like, you hear that? Our helicopter just got here, though.

[Listener Guest]

Not y', all, like, taking off without me. Sad.

[Mike]

I thought you wait A minute. Got her.

[Pat]

Got.

[Guest Rapper]

Got her.

[Mike]

That was too easy. Wait till you see the jet.

[Pat]

All right, you have a good one.

[Listener Guest]

YouTube thing.

[Pat]

Peace.

[Mike]

That's crazy.

[Guest Rapper]

What's good with y'?

[Listener Guest]

All?

[Pat]

What it do? What it do? Welcome to cast on this podcast.

[Guest Rapper]

Thank you for having me again.

[Pat]

Have you been on the pod?

[Guest Rapper]

I've been on three times, bro.

[Mike]

Oh, what you like? What did you say? Is anything memorable?

[Guest Rapper]

I. I don't. The first one was remember my boy made that we made. I made that song with my boy, and then I played it for y'. All.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah, yeah. He couldn't rap. He was trying to chase the beat

[Guest Rapper]

with an AK47.

[Pat]

Oh, I got a question for you. What's something you want to apologize for?

[Guest Rapper]

Well, I want to apologize to my boy for calling. Calling him out on your podcast and, like, saying the music ass. Because y' all made a clip about it and the went viral and he ain't seen it yet, but I don't know if he will.

[Mike]

Oh, he hasn't seen that.

[Guest Rapper]

I'm just. Yeah, I'm just. I'm copping a plea right now. Like, hey, big bro, I ain't even mean all that. I was just trying to be funny for the pod, like, you feel me?

[Mike]

No, that's crazy.

[Guest Rapper]

No, no, not what you mean.

[Mike]

No, that's so crazy. You trying to get an apology on record, and the still ain't even found out the first.

[Guest Rapper]

Take this. Take this out. The clip, though. Like, I. I don't mean it, of course, but, like, he. He like. Like, I. I eat my friend. I don't want to. I don't want him to, like, know I said that.

[Pat]

We're definitely.

[Guest Rapper]

Bro, don't keep this in.

[Pat]

It won't make it. It won't be a clip, but we definitely keeping this.

[Mike]

Yeah, that's not good enough to be a clip, but, like, I've. If he listens.

[Guest Rapper]

All right, good. I don't need it to be. I don't need it to be a clip, but he just going. Listen to this part.

[Mike]

Okay, cool.

[Pat]

All right, start. Start from your plea then. So maybe he skipped this part. Yeah.

[Guest Rapper]

Yo, Berto, I'm sorry for calling you the music ass. Listen, I know you just started a few months ago, and I've been teaching you, so it's basically my fault you asked, too, so I gotta take that responsibility on my shoulders, too. So, listen, we gonna keep making music, keep rocking out, and we're gonna go big one day, all right?

[Pat]

That's how you keep him paying You.

[Guest Rapper]

Huh? He said what?

[Mike]

Talk to that like a baby.

[Guest Rapper]

No, cuz, that's my little bro. Like, he. He 20. I'm 22. That's my little bro.

[Pat]

Big ho. That's how you. I said that's how you keep him to keep paying you, huh?

[Mike]

No, bro.

[Guest Rapper]

What you mean? Are his sessions free money? I wouldn't say it's free. It's transactional. Like, you feel me? Like, you bring. You bring a bottle or you bring some Z. Like, yeah, you could get a. You can get a versus.

[Mike]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Guest Rapper]

If he get you, I'm also the time type.

[Mike]

If he get you loose, he get

[Guest Rapper]

a beat, yo, but I'm also the type where, like, if you pull up to my ST, you got to play me in 2K.

[Mike]

Okay? That, like, all four play before you.

[Guest Rapper]

This. Stay with some jokes, bro. Stay with some jokes, bro. I got some jokes for you, too. Jokes for you, too. I'm playing. I'm playing. I'm popping please again.

[Mike]

All right, man.

[Guest Rapper]

All right, y' all boys, I'm about to hit the liquor stone. About to give you some tailor part, so I'll talk to y' all later.

[Mike]

Bro, that said you gonna rub my feet for you get this beat.

[Guest Rapper]

All right, Pat, you wild.

[Mike]

Well, how many tracks you want? Okay, two tweeted a weeks.

[Pat]

All right, let's do it.

[Mike]

These are the best deleted tweets on Twitter. Okay, the first one is. I guess this was when Demar Hamlin went down with that crazy injury. Yeah, everybody remember that?

[Carrie]

When was that one?

[Mike]

Demar Hamlin, the Buffalo Bills player, he had a.

[Pat]

His heart stopped or something like that, right?

[Carrie]

Oh, yes.

[Mike]

This is perfect. And the reason why you're perfect for this is because what you don't know is what some of our other listeners don't know. No, and I hate when they comment like, damn, y' all went on a sports talk and just left us out. We got y'.

[Pat]

All.

[Mike]

We got y'. All. Somebody here. Okay? Somebody tweeted, said, yo, scrape that off the field. We got a game to play. Crazy. And I remember. And you know who else got in trouble that night was Skip Bayless.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Because he was talking about, like, playoff implications during that time.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And I think that was the downfall of Skip Bayless also. The next one is this. Changed his name to Tyler the Creator. Them movies are ass. Keep it at Tyler Perry. So somebody thought that Tyler Perry tried to change his name. Tyler the Creator.

[Pat]

That would be a dope name change, though.

[Mike]

Definitely a dope name change.

[Pat]

If Tyler the creator wasn't Tyler the creator. I was Tyler Perry. I would want that name it just because I'm creating all these shows.

[Mike]

Yeah. It's just funny how, like, fame makes a name regular.

[Pat]

Yeah. You know, you have to say their whole name.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

That's how you know you made it.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

You can't just tell Tyler Perry, Tyler.

[Mike]

Like, if there was no. If there was no. If there was no ASAP Crew, and I call myself ASAP Pat, I don't think it would hit as hard today. You know what I'm saying?

[Carrie]

I think it would.

[Mike]

ASAP Hat.

[Listener Guest]

Yes.

[Carrie]

It just has to sound different. It sounds like a stage named can work.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

What about Jacques? Nah. Shout out to the Queen mix, though. That should be my.

[Pat]

Oh, man. Were there any other tweeter Sweets?

[Mike]

Yeah, I must. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here we go. Here we go. It was a moment where I think LeBron James checked into the game. Or no, LeBron James is already in the game. And a player named Jabari Smith. Smith was a younger player that plays for the Houston Rockets. Checked into the game, and he didn't have his shirt tucked in. And LeBron James was complaining to the ref like, yo, that's a delayed game. He ain't got a shirt tucked in. And he turned to Jabari Smith. Come into the game with your shirt tucked in on national. Without your shirt tucked in on national tv. That's how we doing it. And the first comment was just like. Just tucked my beater into my draws.

[Pat]

Glazing.

[Carrie]

Why LeBron's snitching out here now.

[Mike]

That's a good tactic, though. Did somebody say, I hate the fact that Brian even had to speak. Okay on Somebody had an obituary. Rest in peace, whoever this is.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

But the obituary is crazy. One at the top, it says, I'm not rich in quotes. I think that was, like, the favorite. The person's favorite quote, I'm not rich. And it says, but I got a lot of love to give. And on the obituary, there's three pictures of the person smoking. And over each picture, it says, puff, puff, pass. And it's the person passing the blunt is like, the last one.

[Pat]

Oh, damn.

[Carrie]

It's creative. I would say that.

[Mike]

Puff, puff, pass. I'll fuck with it. And it says, remember me always. Ways.

[Pat]

I feel it, though. I feel like that's. If that was their character when they're

[Carrie]

alive, if that's what they wanted to be remembered as, then cool. But if they were, like, secretly doing

[Mike]

this stuff for the first time that

[Carrie]

they out Here cheaping on, you know, like, wow.

[Pat]

Nah, you shouldn't improvise a funeral.

[Mike]

I'm always like. I'm always like. I don't know, with like, funerals. Cuz like, to me, like, y' all should be doing y' all job to, like, make sure I get to, like, like, the great afterlife. Like, do all my. Whatever they say in the books do. Yeah, do that.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Don't hold no roast at my funeral tomorrow. This what Pat would have wanted. No, I don't. I don't like jokes like that. Now you'll be mad if somebody put song lyrics on your obituary. Hell yeah. I want my to be serious. Like, I want to feel like they heart about the.

[Pat]

I won't.

[Mike]

Like, if I go before Mike and like, I'm like 78 or some shit like that. Like, I want this done to. To die directly after.

[Pat]

No, bro, heartbreak.

[Mike]

You too.

[Pat]

I think after we're like, 50, we probably won't be friends anymore.

[Mike]

No, no, no, I'm good. I can't take that type of heartbreak. I don't even with old people.

[Pat]

Like, we legit have a contract on, like, our friendship after 50. Like, what else is there?

[Mike]

You know what I mean? We made it. That's a really good friendship, to not

[Carrie]

be friends no more.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like, we go about our own lives. I probably move to another country.

[Mike]

I probably start a radio station in Atlanta and be dissing this subliminally every once in a while. I'm glad I left that. Welcome back to WB 1027.

[Carrie]

That's crazy, man.

[Mike]

A plan is a plan. We can't do this podcast and forever. If y' all think I'm gonna be in, like, my upper 40s doing a podcast, y' all crazy. No offense to anybody that's doing it.

[Pat]

No, I. I probably still be podcasting a podcast community. Yeah, that is half of the podcast.

[Mike]

No, no, no, I'm saying, like, me

[Pat]

personally, personally, cuz you started in your 20s.

[Mike]

Yes. I'm saying, like, I don't want to be doing this for 20 years. If I'm still.

[Pat]

I feel like we. We'll still be doing something, but it. It'll be something different. It might still be a podcast. It been evolved with the times.

[Mike]

The host of Family Feud. The host of family feud 15 years.

[Pat]

Yeah, you. Those. Those hosting jobs, man. Once you in, bro, you can be in for life.

[Carrie]

That he got.

[Mike]

He need to move over.

[Pat]

He keep hosting every Steve Harvey set.

[Mike]

That's what I'm saying.

[Pat]

You're set for life.

[Mike]

I want to do the Wheel of Fortune.

[Pat]

Nevertheless. You know how many people are in front of you for Wheel of Fortune? It's like I feel like with those type of like late night shows is like they have the set people already like Lineage. Cuz people can do those late night shows. You can do those for 20 years, 40 years.

[Mike]

Yeah, they already got the next one. Like Trevor Noah might already be in

[Pat]

line like or some it's going to be the same circle of people. It's gonna be hard for somebody really to break in.

[Carrie]

That's young y' all made me think of. Do you remember the show Whose line is it anyway?

[Mike]

This is my favorite show.

[Carrie]

That show. If it was brought back.

[Pat]

What was the concept again of the show? Was it like they say a line and you have to guess where it's the reference is from?

[Mike]

No, it's like it was more like improv. Like they give you like a situation like Mike, your car just broke down and Gene your incompetent mechanic Canning.

[Pat]

Got it.

[Mike]

Just like got it.

[Pat]

Okay.

[Mike]

And then the thing that would throw it off is just like they'll throw me in and just be like, oh, you're just a passerby who's too nosy. So we'd have to like guess his role or like it's different games. Yeah, yeah.

[Pat]

I remember the title of the show but it's like I really faintly remember Wayne Brady. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Guest Rapper]

That.

[Pat]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was Wayne Brady. Okay, okay. I do remember this show.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Oh, cuz they would like somebody would run up down on stage from their seat, right.

[Carrie]

To perform like two people on the side. And then you had the host. I forgot his name. He was like the, he was the judge.

[Pat]

He's the host of we aging ourselves like crazy.

[Mike]

The host of one of the game shows now. Oh, Price is Right. Price is Right.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

It all connect now.

[Pat]

This is a real okay auntie conversation.

[Mike]

I mean that's how the box over. That's why we we teaching these little something.

[Pat]

No, some of these people are our age so a lot of them are

[Carrie]

age so they know like oh, I ain't thought about that in a minute.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Okay, so. Okay, so I felt bad. I felt really shallow. I was at the mall and I was shoe shopping for someone and because I've always been like a very like adjustable, adaptable person and I, I especially when it comes with women I always say like there's really not a feature that I would look at a woman immediately and be like oh no. Like if I like the woman's personality, and I think she's beautiful. Like, there's no attribute or physical thing that could just throw me off, really.

[Listener Guest]

Until

[Mike]

I was shopping and I tried to get a shoe in my size that I liked, and I was like, oh, should these some fours. You know when you catch like a Jordan 4 at like a Foot Locker or some. This shoe not supposed to be. Be here. Like, let me cop it. And the dude was like. I was like, he's like, what size you are? I was like, 11. And he was like, oh, man, we. If she don't buy that 11, we'll give it to you. So I like, turned around like, oh, she must be buying this for a dude. Like, she definitely buying it. And she had that on her foot. And I was.

[Pat]

What size were they?

[Mike]

11. Men's 11.

[Pat]

Was she super tall, though?

[Mike]

No, but that's the thing. No, but the thing is, is, like, because I thought like, a woman who has like a biggest of foot as mine wouldn't matter because usually that comes with height. Yeah. And I would be okay.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Being in a relationship with someone who's six four, like, who cares? Like, if that's my person, that's my person. But someone who's five nine that wears an 11, ain't nothing I can do with that. You ain't about to be slipping my

[Pat]

sho5 9 is still kind of tall, though.

[Mike]

No, I'm not about to be looking for my shoes.

[Pat]

She already got the hoodies. She got. She got your hoodies. You got your big T shirts, and

[Mike]

now she got your shoes turned into you, babe. You got on the fives. I'm just throwing the fours. Go ahead, go ahead. Like, me and my girl got every shoe, bro. It's perfect now. That would be so annoying.

[Pat]

Same size shoe is a little critical. Cool. No, because, like, but what about the people that are. They're pretty short as well. And the girlfriend is short. Yeah, I've seen them.

[Mike]

We literally know, like, a couple that used to be married that had the same shoe size. But usually it's like a difference, though.

[Pat]

Yeah. You're just the feet not looking as goofy.

[Mike]

I think of my girlfriend now. We got a similar style. And like, if we had the same shoe size, she probably would definitely wear my shoes.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And I wouldn't want that.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

You know what I'm saying, man? Like, and I wouldn't want somebody looking down at like. You know what I mean? Like, I think every dude looking at my girl feet shoes is where it stops.

[Carrie]

You don't care if it's like a double XL shirt.

[Pat]

She cuz now they might be questioning where you got your shoes from. Like you and your girl's shoes right now.

[Mike]

Now you got a question where she got her shoes from?

[Pat]

You know, like, come on now, baby.

[Mike]

The bread ones. You think I'm stupid? What?

[Guest Rapper]

That

[Mike]

she got you asking insecure ass questions. So what size shoe was your ex, would you say? Oh, he was 11 like me.

[Pat]

So if your girl came with the same size hoodie, like from another. Not another relationship, just in general. She had it in her closet. It was already an XL hoodie. You. You wouldn't feel away about it being XL hoodie if it's.

[Mike]

It got to be designer or something like, something like that. I can't replace if I can't.

[Pat]

But in Excel, though, if it's not her size, like your size, like, you

[Carrie]

know it's from another man.

[Mike]

Yeah, if that nice. If it's a Balenciaga hoodie and it's a 2x and I know she got it from another dude. You know what I'm saying? I'm rocking that. And I might tag that.

[Pat]

Hey, bro, you got hella taste, bro.

[Mike]

But I'm never going. I'm never going out in it. I feel like that's kind of like, oh, you got my going outfit. Like, no, I'm about to hoop in your Balenciaga. All post moves.

[Pat]

Post with your. Yo, we are taking a quick break from the podcast. Hey, don't. Don't times to us. This is our own ad. This is for tour.

[Mike]

Slow that down.

[Pat]

We are live in Chicago, March 2026. Tickets are. Are moving quickly. New York is super low. Atlanta, Nashville, April 7th and 8th. Nashville. Then we got the 15. We got Baltimore, Philly, Boston, New York, Charlotte, Raleigh. We gotta emphasize Raleigh a lot.

[Mike]

Yes, Raleigh, y' all pop out. I know some of y', all, like, live in Raleigh. Y' all bought show. I mean, tickets to the Charlotte show. We apologize. But if you in Raleigh, make sure you pop out. The Charlotte tickets are halfway gone, just to give y' all a heads up. So it's moving pretty fast. That show is moving. We're also doing one in Raleigh again next day, so come on.

[Pat]

And new dates. We got Cleveland, May 28th. We got Toronto, Toronto, Toronto, May 30th. And we got Detroit, May 31st.

[Mike]

Homecoming.

[Pat]

Yeah. Make sure you guys get your tickets. Don't wait to get your tickets, please. Just get them as soon as you can. And hey, I don't know what else we got to Tell y', all, man.

[Mike]

Hey, hey, get your tickets. No complaining. If you buy a ticket, tag us on ig, Facebook, Twitter, whatever. We'll repost it because obviously we appreciate it.

[Pat]

And again, crashdummies live.com. there was people going to, like, some fake websites to get the tickets. It was like $350.

[Mike]

Don't buy no resale tickets.

[Pat]

No.

[Mike]

Like, if you gonna get somebody 350, give it to me personally. I'll make sure you get into the venue. Don't even worry about nothing.

[Pat]

Just go to crashdummieslive.com to get the tickets. All right, y', all, back to the show.

[Mike]

All right, this is a listener from Dublin, Ireland, who sent us an email to wish her boyfriend Des or dez a happy birthday. It says, me and my boyfriend are from Dublin, Ireland, and my boyfriend listens to every episode of yours every Wednesday. And I mean every episode. Holy. He recently got me to listen to and told me how much it meant to him when he worked graveyard shifts. His birthday is coming up now on Saturday, and I was hoping if there's any chance you guys could give him a birthday shout out on the next episode. Episode. His name is Dez. He's turning 22 and would mean the world to him. I'm already hoping to surprise him with videos from all his friends and the Patreon subscription. So she buying you the Patreon subscription, but a shout out from you guys would be the cherry on top. Cheers, listeners from Dublin. What you got to say?

[Pat]

No, we're not doing it, bro.

[Mike]

No, we good, bro.

[Pat]

We can't. No birthday shout outs?

[Mike]

No, no, because we start with you, then we got to read everybody, and everybody's sending their birthday. What about me? What about now? We just playing happy birthday.

[Pat]

He already cut it off by now at least. I can't take no happy birthday, bro. In life, you guys.

[Mike]

Nah, that's crazy. Hey, let us know if it's more listeners in Dublin, Ireland. That way, you know, we might do a show up out there.

[Pat]

Yeah, we're gonna do a show in

[Mike]

London, so we just gonna send Gene and. Just gonna be two holograms of us. Yeah. Now appearing the Crash dummy Animatronics.

[Pat]

Oh, there was a. A video from Two Bears. One Cave with Birch Kreischer. Whoa, Two Bears. One Cave with Bert Kreischer and. Yeah, but the question was they were talking about last meal in jail and stuff like that in prison. So what would be your death row meal? Meal?

[Mike]

My death row meal would be boiled eggs, baked beans, Pinto beans, kidney beans, sardines, whole milk, laxatives, chocolate.

[Pat]

You try to make a mess in there.

[Mike]

When y' all come to me, y' all gonna smell this shit, I promise you. Because I know I'm a shit on myself.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

And I want it to be the nastiest ever. Like y' all gonna have to clean up. Hella. And I hope I got the little. The jogging suit on so it spill out like a little leakage.

[Pat]

No, you gotta like wear like rubber boots or something. And tie the edge, Just tie your edge of your feet. Tie the edge of your feet. Say just a big bubble of

[Mike]

no real bro.

[Pat]

I probably do sunflower seeds. I just going to eat it one by one. I just want to waste time. I literally just eat it one by one. Like y', all, I get a last meal. Cuz is there a time limit to the last meal or how long it take me to eat?

[Mike]

I think there is a time limit. They gonna cook your. Got barbecue. Like you about to be the barbecue sunflower.

[Pat]

Start turning to popcorn. And

[Mike]

now just put some popcorn seeds in his mouth before he get on the thing. Oh, that be. That'd be funny. That'd be funny. G. Watch your die.

[Pat]

I don't think they use electric chair like that no more.

[Mike]

No, they do lethal injection.

[Pat]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You know, with the lethal injection. Like the lethal injection people don't know some this in some states, but they don't know who like gave the, the, the, the. The poison basically the thing that killed them.

[Mike]

There's four doctors.

[Pat]

Yeah, yeah. Just for their conscience.

[Mike]

Four doctors? Yeah, like four. Like fake. Oh yeah.

[Carrie]

So if you had to choose.

[Pat]

No, it was just four.

[Carrie]

If you had to choose, what would you want to. How would you want to go out? Gunshot through the lethal injection.

[Mike]

A firing squat just so I can see like they're. There's people that are actively killing me that way. I can like even that sometimes lash out, you know, at the end.

[Pat]

Like y', all, y'.

[Mike]

All. Some do it.

[Guest Rapper]

You know what I'm saying?

[Mike]

But like lethal injection is more like.

[Pat]

They got you like in a room. It's a two, a one way mirror, one way mirror.

[Mike]

You can't see. You don't know who outside. It's your high school bully out there, he playing uno behind the thing. Like yeah, he's killing this. But it's just like you don't know what's there. And it seems like more sad that the electric chair seems like, okay, you strapping me and like that. It's just like no firing squad, the

[Pat]

gas chamber, like, all that stuff will be like, not good.

[Mike]

Everything else is like, too, like, claustrophobic. Yeah, you want the quickest thing. Quickest thing. You know what I'm saying? Or some. Like, like, yeah, I want to go out like Cleo, like a gangster day after day, bruh. When I tell you that as black people, we have some sad ass endings to like some movies like, like set it off. Sad ass ending. Hardball. Sad ass ending. And I. I forgot Michael B. Jordan was even in Hardball, man. Shout out to Michael B. Jordan, though.

[Pat]

Oh, yeah, man. I. I had an Oscar question actually. If you don't show up for an award, do you think you should win that award?

[Listener Guest]

Yeah.

[Mike]

You don't think so?

[Carrie]

No, not something like a Oscar.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Carrie]

If it's like something small, then. Okay.

[Mike]

I think this, I think it's the opposite, though. Oscar. You definitely, like, you had to earn that. But like, if we doing like, you know, best radio station in Atlanta and then y' all not here. Y'.

[Listener Guest]

All.

[Mike]

Not the best.

[Pat]

When Sean Penn. Sean Penn didn't show up, but I guess he was in some other country talking and. Because I kind of wanted Delroy to win from. For his. His part in Sinners.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

But Sean Penn did play a really good character as well. Like, and people are kind of mad about it because. And his character. What's the movie called again? One battle after another. He basically was. His. His reputation in the movie was. Was bad. Like, it was like a lot of essay stuff going on. But I think when an actor can make you feel away, whether it's angry, happy, sad, that's like really good acting to me. And if he makes you feel a certain way, I feel like he had a bigger part in. In his show than there was I did.

[Mike]

Yeah. It's a lot of people. I don't with the, the dude who is on. Who was in the wheelchair. He got a brother, Harris. His brother famous too. He was in a wheelchair on one of Tyler Perry movies and he used to abuse the girl.

[Carrie]

Oh, the evil guy.

[Mike]

Evil guy. Like, yeah, I don't. With him. I don't. With Pinky from Friday. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm just thinking, like, character.

[Pat]

But that's like good acting, though. I feel like if you, if you make somebody hate you, like, and you can see past like the character they're playing.

[Mike]

Look up Michael E. Look up evil Dave Chappelle. Michael Ely. What.

[Pat]

What movie was he the bad guy in?

[Carrie]

In the Four Color Girls.

[Mike]

Oh, yeah, yeah. But I've seen him in good roles too though.

[Carrie]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Michael Ely was like the. The heartthrob.

[Mike]

Like talking about a movie. I don't with this.

[Pat]

Wait. Evil Day Chappelle is funny, bro.

[Mike]

No, that dude. That dude make me mad. I'm not going to lie to you.

[Carrie]

So buddy from one battle after another wasn't there to get.

[Pat]

No, he wasn't there.

[Carrie]

See, if I lost and I see that the winner.

[Pat]

Yeah, exactly.

[Carrie]

I'm pissed.

[Pat]

I'm a little salty. I'm a little salty. And he's like his character. Like his. The way people describe him is like he kind of has like that nonchalant like, energy. Like it's like, like he can be out fishing the way. Same way like Jokic, they say he don't like playing the NBA. He likes his horses more than the NBA. It's kind of that feeling.

[Mike]

Okay, no, I get that.

[Pat]

But shout out to Michael B. Jordan too, for winning. Yeah, yeah.

[Mike]

And Ryan Cooper Coogler. They trying to tear Ryan cooler down.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Listener Guest]

Why?

[Carrie]

What do you do?

[Mike]

They just. I think anytime someone wins something, every. I want to call them all minorities, but every, every group of people that have been oppressed, they go, look at that. If that person was an advocate for them before, they like give them their flowers and stuff like that. And I think a lot of people are like trying to do that. And it's like sometimes people don't make statements on stuff.

[Pat]

I didn't know the, the thing was to go to In N Out and take a, you know, take a picture with the Oscar.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Cuz I went Michael B. Jordan, though, I was judging with a little bit. I was like, bro, I know he don't like in and out that much. But then, but then when I found out, it was like, that's the thing to do. That was like, okay, that makes sense.

[Carrie]

I found that out too.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Carrie]

I was like, all right.

[Mike]

No home cook meal. No, you can. You can tell that ain't bit a burger in like five years. That bit that and he wiped his whole mouth. What's the y' all be eating? Like the McDonald's CEO. Yeah, but CEO like, damn, I've been killing for years with this.

[Pat]

Have you had. Have you. Have you had any out?

[Carrie]

I have.

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah.

[Pat]

It's very.

[Mike]

Oh, don't do that. You. We said we wouldn't diss no restaurants and now you about to diss in and out. You ready to go down? Yes, he was.

[Pat]

You think I was about to dis it.

[Mike]

Yes. Written in. Felt like, you know, he was right. In and out. 1 and 10.

[Pat]

1 to 10.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Okay. It's not the worst burger I've ever had.

[Mike]

Okay. I'm saying the whole experience. Cuz you had their fries too style.

[Pat]

Yeah, it was animal style. N fre g.

[Mike]

Wait, what? I thought. I think it's.

[Pat]

I think it's animals. I think it's animal.

[Mike]

Definitely animal. I only been there once. All right, that going to the wrong in and out. Really going in.

[Pat]

What Nasty style is crazy. Go in and out. Say, can I get the fries nasty style. He's like, I gotta go to the back room with your. Real quick.

[Mike]

Got a shirt on that say fries. You talking about in and out Ranch?

[Pat]

That's exactly the nasty thought they're gonna put on that too.

[Mike]

This is our glazed burger. No, that's too crazy, man.

[Pat]

All right. That's been the Crash Dummies podcast. Carrie, appreciate you being on the podcast. They've been loving you. Shout out to everything you got again.

[Carrie]

Of course. Wait, can I ask y' all a question real quick?

[Pat]

Go ahead.

[Carrie]

So my fiance is on a bachelor's trip right now.

[Pat]

Oh, how.

[Carrie]

How do men be acting on bachelor's trips? Have y' all ever been.

[Mike]

They. Only met him once. Let me. We cool, bro. Where he going?

[Carrie]

They went to Cancun.

[Mike]

They.

[Guest Rapper]

Do you know the.

[Mike]

Do you know all the. All the grooms?

[Carrie]

It was like 11 of them. And he's the best man, so.

[Mike]

Oh, he's the best man.

[Pat]

Is that for him? Is that his.

[Carrie]

He is the best man for the Bachelor.

[Guest Rapper]

Back to our previous statement.

[Mike]

Okay, but can't go and kind of like, relax.

[Pat]

That's like. That's like very like. You know what I normal.

[Mike]

I think as somebody who's not, you know, getting married, he's there just to have a good time. He's probably influencing, you know, the actual. No, no, no. You know, he definitely. He. He's definitely a big influence because. Yeah, when I was best man, I like control, like the activities and stuff like that. So, like, what kind of activity person is he? Is he more of like an experienced person?

[Carrie]

So I know where they went. So they did. They had some clubs, obviously, really big sections. I do have the love. They also did like a big boat party situation somewhere and really was just a lot of clubs and stuff at the. In the Airbnb.

[Pat]

Out of the 11 people, how many of the 11 are single men?

[Carrie]

Maybe only a couple.

[Mike]

A couple. Okay.

[Pat]

Is it more?

[Mike]

Is it.

[Pat]

Are we. Cuz it's 10.

[Carrie]

I think it's more people in relationships than.

[Pat]

Okay. That's always a good sign.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like too many. When. When it's.

[Carrie]

I don't know about like fiance type situation because people don't take boyfriend, girlfriend.

[Mike]

What? You know what resort they're staying at exactly.

[Carrie]

No.

[Mike]

Oh, okay. There. There is an adults only resort in Cancun.

[Guest Rapper]

Oh.

[Mike]

And it's called Temptation. Cancun, sounds about right. The playground for grownups. Cares to 21 and over adults offering a vibrant and passion infused topless optional environment.

[Carrie]

I'm just gonna hope that they just out there playing poker.

[Mike]

No, you're good.

[Pat]

No, no, no.

[Guest Rapper]

We.

[Mike]

No, because what we doing. We. We influencing the comments right now.

[Pat]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mike]

Don't do that. Don't do that. He good though.

[Pat]

I think I met him.

[Mike]

He seemed like come on now.

[Pat]

But it depends. It does depend who's leading it.

[Carrie]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Because I feel like if I had a bachelor party I would want it more like activity based as well. Well like we probably going to play like a tournament of something.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Like paintball, soccer, soccer, go karts. Some something.

[Carrie]

Something competitive contest.

[Pat]

Not want to do all that. We'll probably, we'll probably go to now if we're in Ken. We probably do go to a couple clubs.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Listener Guest]

Yeah.

[Pat]

But I feel like everybody's different. Like a lot of clubs with bachelorette parties. I feel like people, they could be different too because they had. They might have those like super horny bra made of on corners and they had those. The dancy teddy bears come in and

[Mike]

they putting the sheets off.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Yeah. And they sucking dick behind the shoes. We can still see the sheet is literally see through. Like we can see.

[Carrie]

I feel like they don't get strippers anymore. Like bachelor parties.

[Pat]

No. I think honestly I do think people that are getting married are a little bit more matured these days.

[Mike]

Yes. I feel like too many cameras and shit.

[Guest Rapper]

Yeah.

[Pat]

Their Internet and block again. Yeah. Like, like having like strippers at your. Your bachelor party. I feel like it's a little if, if that's your thing, like if you and your partner are okay with that, then that's your thing. But if like you put in like other people in uncomfortable situations.

[Mike]

Yeah. I'm not into like hired women. Like that's. That will always throw me off. Like I can't hire someone to hang around me because like now everything you say is disingenuous, genuine. Like no. Like my shirt can't be that nice.

[Pat]

I was.

[Mike]

Hands off me.

[Pat]

I was at a party one Time. And this is, like, where I was like, okay, this is a weird occupation. There was a. A woman on the table, and she. They had, like, the. The finger food on her.

[Carrie]

Okay, I've seen that.

[Pat]

Yeah. Like, she was covered in, like, she was, like, she was pretty much naked, but, like, her privates are covered by, like, the. The food. And you can like, pick the, like, a. A finger food, like crackers or, like, dip caviar offer off of her, and you can kind of, like, dip your chips in

[Listener Guest]

it.

[Pat]

It felt very soulless. Like, it was just like, how do you even get into, like, this occupation?

[Mike]

That's how I know I'm good. Like, I've never been that freaky. My biggest concern is, like, damn, did she wash up today? Like, I'm eating a chip over her rib.

[Pat]

Well, it's like one of those, like, super fancy parties. It's just like, man, money would make a lot of people just do, like, very weird.

[Mike]

But it is. It is that middle ground, though. Like, I feel like I'm in that middle ground.

[Guest Rapper]

I.

[Mike]

For some reason, I, like, don't enjoy guys night. Like, I enjoy guys night at, like, maybe, like, a cap of four. But if you add that fifth dude, like this, like, yeah, I don't like rolling.

[Pat]

It's like.

[Mike]

It's like a meat factory in this. Like, it's like, not even. Like, I need women around, but I just like it to be, like, like, different conversations when there's too many dudes. A conversation kind of just goes down like, this. This path eventually. And then eventually, you playing Mary Kill with, like, Whoopy Goldberg. If.

[Pat]

If I'm at a club, too, like, even as I go out, like, say, if I'm at a bachelor park, I don't also don't want to be at a. A club that is all dudes at. Like, there has to be girls there.

[Mike]

Yes.

[Pat]

Not because I want to do anything with the girls, but it's just, like, it's a different vibe when there's women around and they're having fun. It's just like, a different energy.

[Carrie]

Tension.

[Pat]

Yeah. Just more. It's just like, a wig.

[Carrie]

Feminine energy.

[Pat]

Yeah.

[Mike]

That's facts and people watching, too. Like, I want to see some interactions. Like, I want to see this get dissed for the fifth time tonight. I already knew it. This stink. Like, they got to smell this. Just like I do. Remember, summer's coming up. If you can smell yourself a little, we can smell you a lot.

[Pat]

Now we got to insert a deodorant ad there.

[Mike]

We really need a deodorant that and make sure like listen Indiana Shout out to Indiana nobody was musty shout out to St. Louis only two of y' all was musty and they know who they is cuz they brothers both now you a little around you but I know what y' all was doing though. I think it was some weed or something.

[Pat]

Anything you got coming up, Carrie?

[Carrie]

Yeah, Brewer season. Make sure you guys catch me at the brewers games hosting and just make sure you listen to my podcast daily brainstorming squeeze find it anywhere you listen to podcast and follow me on Instagram at car noncore your girl Noni Juice.

[Mike]

Hey yeah. Yeah, the merch is going out, y'. All.

[Pat]

Yeah, merch is being delivered.

[Mike]

I'm trying to create some new designs so DM me some ideas I might have from Merch. Y' all not getting no credit, nothing like that. Maybe like a free shirt of that design asking for 10 is going to get you blocked. Thanks for the idea. Also follow my tik tok not pat 777. It's supposed to be a burner account but. But it is what it is.

[Pat]

I don't got going on right now, but.

[Mike]

All right, y' all put his box and highlight up.

[Pat]

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[Mike]

That's the og.

[Pat]

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[Mike]

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[Pat]

And they all bring the Monster Energy punch. So if you've been living in the White can branch out.

[Mike]

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[Pat]

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