Transcript
Dean Graziosi (0:00)
Living the hard way is easy and living the easy way is hard. Like, think about it. It's easy to order pizza and fried food at McDonald's and sit on the couch and binge on Netflix. That's easy. But it's really hard when you're 60 years old and you have diabetes and you're out of shape and you can't play with your kids, Right? It's really easy to neglect a relationship, go out, be unfaithful, drink, party, forget about it. But it's really hard if that causes the end of a marriage or split of a family. Right? And it's the same thing in business. Sometimes it's easy to say, ah, you know, I'll just stay with this job. I get a paycheck every day. And while the economy shifted, I still have a job. That's easy. But it's really hard when you're older and you don't have the freedom. So when I think about that, it makes me want to work hard now to plant seeds, right? Life is hard. Having a boss telling you what to do and you're not happy, that's hard. Not having control to do what you want when you want to do it, that's hard. Not living into your full potential that God or whatever you believe the universe gave you, that's probably the hardest thing in the world. So. So why not live a little harder now so you can live easier for many lives, you know, many generations to come.
Heather Monahan (1:00)
On this journey with me each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity.
Guest (1:07)
And set you up for a better tomorrow. I'm ready for my close up.
Heather Monahan (1:12)
Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're joining me. This last week has been beyond crazy. Number one, I'm losing my mind being in quarantine this long, and I know so some people are in different situations. For some people, it sounds like there's been moments where it's been really great and they're spending family time and they have a house and a yard and, you know, things to do. The difference for me, and everyone has their own unique experience. So I'm not saying one is better or harder, but mine has not been that great in that it's challenging being in a condo in Miami because we can't really leave. When you try to leave the building, you come into contact with so, so many people, it's overwhelming. And some people really respect social distancing. Some don't even wear masks. Tonight I was in an elevator with two People I didn't get on, actually, I, I opted not to. The elevator stopped on my floor to get me and there was two people in their 20s with no masks on, dressed up to go out. And I just thought, oh my gosh, we live in a country of two worlds where some people are like me with masks and gloves on, you know, opting to take the stairs, which frankly I need to. Cause I'm getting zero steps in every day and you know, it's a crazy time for everyone. I have a lot of empathy for everyone. I've made the choice to lead with empathy because I don't want to get annoyed and try to have as much understanding as possible. And the reason why I do that is I need to have understanding for myself. I even had a major meltdown on my son last night, which I really never do. I mean, I don't even maybe one other time in quarantine have I done this. But I just lost it on him. He's very funny and he imitates me a lot. He imitates everybody a lot, not just me. And he's very, very funny. And he was imitating me right before bed last night and I had a super stressful day today and he started pretending to be me, you know, because I'm stressed out. And he knew it and was talking about how much I had to do today and how overwhelming it is and how I was want to get organized and I want to run through the agenda, his class schedule matching with my work schedule and when will I feed him and you know, just chaos. We're in a very small condo. So he started pretending to be me and I snapped. I just lost it and I yelled at him and I felt awful after. But I wanted him to know how hard I work and how while I try not to involve him in any of this. This has been really difficult. Pivoting an entire company and business where my number one revenue stream was flying to events and speaking at events and now that's completely gone and that I'm really working so hard and I've made some bad choices and undersold myself and over committed myself. But there were things I needed to do to move quickly and create new revenue. And I'm learning as I go and I'm. I'm trying to be really understanding the mistakes that I make and proud that I've moved so quickly to market. However, when he decided to make fun of me at 9 o' clock at night, the night before, I have a chaotic day and I'm stressing Out because I wasn't prepared for a few things. I lost it, and it was a really awful feeling. I went in to say goodnight to him after, and he didn't really have much to say to me. He was very hurt. I could tell. And I didn't sleep at all last night, which, gosh, you know, compounds everything when you have a crappy night's sleep on top of having a bad showing like that. And not a great parenting moment. And this morning, I went in there and just laid down next to him and told him how sorry I was. And he said, you know what, Mom? It's my fault. I shouldn't have made fun of you. And it was sort of an interesting moment. And I don't know what the right answer is. That's what's so hard about freaking parenting, right? Is that we never really know what the right answer is. I just said to him, it's not your fault. You joke around with me all the time, and 99.9% of the time, I'm laughing with you. This one time, I lost it. That's because I wasn't handling my stress and my emotion correctly, and that's my fault, and I'm committing to you to do a better job. And I told him, I said, sometimes you really help me a lot when you stand next to me and say, let's do the breathing. Because my whole life with him, I always say, all right, calm down. Let's do the breathing. Deep breaths. We can get through this. We can handle this. Imitates me, and it's super funny. But sometimes now I see him say to me, mom, come here. All right, let's do the breathing. You know, he coaches me up when I need it. And I told him, I said, in the future, if you see me getting unraveled like that, please come grab my hand and help me do the breathing, because that's really what mom needs. And so he told me he would help me, but I didn't want him to feel to blame, you know, I don't want him to grow to be an adult that blames himself for things when other people need to be responsible for their behavior. So I wanted to accept responsibility. I did apologize to him. I felt terrible about it. He was just being funny, and I just couldn't handle. It's like the straw that broke the camel's back. I'm so freaking sick of being inside. And I actually went out to the park today to work out with my girlfriend, who's a trainer, socially distanced, but I just felt so lucky for that opportunity. And again, I know some people aren't living like this and geez, I see in the news some places just are living normal. But for whatever reason, I'm really cautious and that's how I'm living. And you know, just asking people not to judge me. But yeah, I definitely make it harder on myself that way. But I'm healthy and safe and for that I'm really grateful. So anyways, it's just been this crazy weekend. I did a couple things I typically don't do, but I wanted to share with you. Going into today, I just, I had an overwhelming day. And when I was looking at my agenda for the week a couple days ago, I just said, Thursday is going to crush me, I'm not going to be able to do it. And I had a calendar invite for me being a guest on another podcast and I love to do that because it helps drive new listeners for my show, helps me to expand my reach, expand my social media, which are all functions and funnels to sell more products or more downloads for my show, or more books for my new book coming out, or more courses for my mentoring program. So for me, this all feeds my business. It's business related and I try to make good business decisions. So sometimes I overextend myself to do things like that because you never know what the payoff could be, could really help. Sometimes it doesn't do much at all, but you know, it's also helping people's shows and you know, you want to try to help out whenever you can. So I've done a million podcasts, which allows me to be a better podcaster and pay it forward. So I, I ended up a few days ago, I've never done this before. I had accepted a calendar invite to do a show for somebody else and I canceled it and the poor guy sent me an email right away and he said, heather, oh my gosh, I just got a decline on the calendar invite that you had already accepted. What is going on? And is there any way we could reschedule for June? And it was so nice of him and I wrote back, oh my gosh, thank you so much. So appreciate you saying that. Of course we can reschedule or you know, whatever for June. That's not a problem. So I happen to over commit myself on this day and I have paid events that I'm speaking for that I need to be present for that's paying my bills. And I really appreciate you understanding and he was so kind about it. So it worked out. But it just reminded me, you know, sometimes saying no is hard, even in different dynamics. You know, maybe I should have said no when he initially asked me and just said let's hold off to June or July, which is now what I'm doing to people. I'm just saying July and July and August now because there's so many commitments and so many moving parts and I'm trying to learn how to become more efficient, effective and automated in this new business that I'm getting into. It's taking a lot more time than I had forecast and it's been much more challenging than I thought. Doesn't mean it hasn't been rewarding or amazing. And there's so many amazing things I want to share with you around that topic, around this new business, the mentoring program and how great it's going. And I, I'm grateful for the opportunity to be able to impact people's lives. It makes me cry. I'm so grateful. And I see magic happening and having that feeling of being a part of something that's magical. I can't put words to it. After, you know, 20 something years working for the quote unquote man to drive revenue and increase shareholders value and net worth was nothing. It meant nothing to me. And this really means so much, but this is really fricking hard. You know, I'm learning how to connect apps through Zapier. I didn't even know what Zapier was a year ago. I'm learning how to set up a Shopify store, I'm learning how to connect Shopify with Flodesk. I'm learning how to work type form and online questionnaires and so that I don't have to send touch everything and send all the emails and there's so much automation out there, it's mind blowing.
