Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan

Episode Summary: "Confidence Classic: The Formula For STRONG Relationships, With Kathryn Gordon"

Release Date: January 7, 2025
Guest: Kathryn Gordon, Relationship Expert & Best-Selling Author
Book: Relationship Grit
Podcast: Katherine for Real

Introduction

In this compelling episode of "Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan," host Heather Monahan welcomes Kathryn Gordon, a multifaceted relationship expert, best-selling author of Relationship Grit, and host of the Katherine for Real podcast. Kathryn brings a wealth of personal and professional experience, offering listeners actionable strategies to build and maintain strong, fulfilling relationships.

Kathryn Gordon’s Journey

Kathryn Gordon's path to relationship expertise is both inspiring and relatable. She transitioned from a successful career in sales to pursuing her passions in acting and modeling. After dedicating time to raising her children and supporting her husband's speaking and consulting business, Kathryn embarked on her second act, investing in real estate, movies, and mentoring women. Her dedication to personal growth and relationship excellence culminated in her best-selling book, Relationship Grit.

Prioritizing Relationships

One of the foundational topics Kathryn discusses is the importance of prioritizing romantic relationships over other commitments. She emphasizes that partners often receive the "leftover" time and energy after attending to work, children, and friends, which can lead to feelings of neglect.

Kathryn Gordon [00:00]: "Your relationship should come first... It should be the other way around."

Kathryn explains that entering a relationship means bringing past experiences and vulnerabilities. She advocates for making relationships a primary focus to cultivate the love and support partners deserve.

Insights from Relationship Grit

Relationship Grit offers 11 actionable tips for building strong relationships, complemented by perspectives from both male and female viewpoints. Kathryn highlights the simplicity and effectiveness of these tips, making them accessible for anyone, regardless of their current relationship status.

Kathryn Gordon [04:25]: "It's grit. G-R-I-T. G stands for God... R is resolve... I is invest... T is together."

These principles are designed to shift mindsets and encourage partners to work collaboratively toward a harmonious relationship.

Overcoming Competition in Relationships

Heather shares a personal revelation inspired by Kathryn's teachings about avoiding competition within a relationship. Reflecting on her tendency to compete with her partner, Heather recounts an epiphany moment that transformed her approach to partnership.

Heather Monahan [06:01]: "We're not supposed to compete. We're on the same team."

Kathryn reinforces this concept by addressing how competition can stem from insecurity and hinder relationship growth. She encourages couples to cheer each other on, fostering a supportive and united front.

Kathryn Gordon [06:43]: "When you're on a team, you're not competing with each other."

The Power of Compliments

Another significant insight Kathryn offers is the transformative power of genuine compliments. She shares a heartfelt story about how simple acts of praise can disarm negative emotions and strengthen bonds.

Kathryn Gordon [09:40]: "I turned around and I was like, 'John, you look so handsome in that suit. You better be careful. Those ladies are going to be chasing after you.'"

This approach not only uplifts the partner but also shifts the dynamic from competition to mutual appreciation.

Communication and Family Meetings

Effective communication is a recurring theme in Kathryn's advice. She advocates for regular family or couple meetings to maintain connection and address upcoming challenges.

Kathryn Gordon [15:15]: "Have a family meeting... Talk about what's going on for your week, what you have coming up. It's about making the connection."

By establishing consistent communication routines, couples can prevent misunderstandings and foster a deeper emotional connection.

Personal Struggles and Growth

Kathryn opens up about her own experiences with emotional and spiritual challenges in relationships. She details her journey from enduring volatile family dynamics to healing and building a strong partnership with her husband, John.

Kathryn Gordon [12:48]: "I started to work on myself and realized that I needed to break this chain. And it's never too late."

Her vulnerability serves as a testament to the power of self-improvement and resilience in overcoming past wounds to create healthier relationships.

The Role of Faith and Prayer

Faith plays a crucial role in Kathryn and John's relationship. Kathryn explains how incorporating God into their marriage provided a strong foundation and guidance during tumultuous times.

Kathryn Gordon [23:20]: "The G in grit stands for God... The prayer we developed has been a cornerstone of our relationship."

Their shared prayer underscores the importance of spiritual connection and mutual support in sustaining long-term commitments.

Maintaining Relationships as Role Models

Heather and Kathryn discuss the significant impact that parents' relationships have on their children. Kathryn emphasizes the responsibility of modeling healthy relationships to guide the next generation.

Kathryn Gordon [26:47]: "Modeling good relationships teaches our children how to communicate with others, just in general."

By prioritizing their relationship, Kathryn and her husband demonstrate positive behaviors that their children can emulate, fostering healthy interpersonal skills.

Future Projects and Podcast

Kathryn is not stopping at her current achievements. She is developing a new book focused on intimacy and oneness in relationships, moving beyond physical aspects to explore deeper emotional connections. Additionally, her podcast, Katherine for Real, continues to feature high-profile guests and tackle real, sometimes uncomfortable, questions about relationships.

Kathryn Gordon [37:36]: "I'm writing a book about the keys to great sex... It’s about intimacy and oneness."

Heather lauds Kathryn's forthcoming projects, highlighting the ongoing contribution Kathryn makes to relationship education and support.

Notable Quotes

• Kathryn Gordon [02:00]: "You can make your relationship everything you always wanted it to be. It's vulnerability, communication. It's all the things we talk about."

• Heather Monahan [06:01]: "We're not supposed to compete. We're on the same team."

• Kathryn Gordon [09:40]: "I turned around and I was like, 'John, you look so handsome in that suit. You better be careful. Those ladies are going to be chasing after you.'"

• Kathryn Gordon [15:15]: "Have a family meeting... Talk about what's going on for your week, what you have coming up. It's about making the connection."

• Kathryn Gordon [23:20]: "The G in grit stands for God... The prayer we developed has been a cornerstone of our relationship."

Conclusion

This episode of "Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan" offers profound insights into building and sustaining strong relationships through vulnerability, effective communication, and mutual support. Kathryn Gordon's personal stories and practical advice provide listeners with the tools needed to prioritize their relationships and model healthy behaviors for future generations. Her emphasis on faith, grit, and continuous self-improvement serves as a roadmap for anyone looking to enhance their romantic partnerships.

For those seeking to deepen their understanding of relationship dynamics and implement meaningful changes, Kathryn’s Relationship Grit and her podcast Katherine for Real are invaluable resources.

Stay Connected:

• Kathryn Gordon on Instagram: @katheringordon
• Book: Relationship Grit - Available at Relationship Grit Books
• Podcast: Katherine for Real - Listen Here