B (2:26)

Hey, y'. All.

A (2:27)

Hey.

B (2:27)

I'm very cozy. That was amazing. Thank you. Thank you.

A (2:33)

It's literally you and the things you have done. Oh my goodness. You're such a star.

B (2:38)

Thank you.

A (2:38)

Do you feel like everywhere you go people are just like, oh my God, that girl, that girl, that girl.

B (2:42)

I'm not even Gonna hold you. Yes. Especially in Brooklyn and in Houston.

A (2:48)

Oh, yes, I'm all right. I'd be like,

B (2:53)

yes, yes, definitely.

A (2:55)

I feel like most of us probably first saw you on tour with Beyonce and it was like as soon as we saw her, we were locked in like, oh, that girl. She is the one absolutely up there hitting it. Your talent is incredible. It just leaps off the stage. It's such a joy to watch you perform.

B (3:09)

Thank you.

A (3:10)

So when did you first realize that dance wasn't just like a cute little fun thing on the side for you? Something that maybe felt like a bigger calling.

B (3:19)

That moment for me was when I got nominated for the Monsters of Hip Hop show by Rhapsody James.

A (3:25)

Oh, period.

B (3:26)

So I always credited there's different dark skinned, plus sized women in the dance industry that have like been able to crack open that door for us. And Rhapsody James was that for me in my generation and for her to nominate me for it's like at that time, the biggest hip hop dance show a dancer that wasn't in the industry could be on. Because the faculty at the time, well, still, till now, they have the hottest choreographers, creative directors, and you have the opportunity out of like thousands of dancers that get selected for it to be in a one hour show and have that one on one, you know, moment with them. And when she nominated me, I was just like, that was the click in my head, like, oh, no, I'm all right, this is you. And for her to see me in her, I was just like, okay, she's letting me know it's my turn and it's time to, you know, step up to the point.

A (4:26)

Crowning the next one up.

B (4:27)

Definitely.

A (4:28)

What was it like for you? Like the internal feelings of like somebody you admire and respect so much, being like, it is you, baby. Of all the girls.

B (4:37)

It was a very overwhelming experience because I'm still fresh from Jacksonville. This happened in Orlando, Florida, which is like our neighbor. And Rhapsody, she's in LA and she's in New York. It was very emotional. Like I couldn't even afford to go to the whole three day weekend of this intensive. My mom had asked the founder if I could do at least one day. And it was the day of the audition specifically. So I had left to go back home on the day of the announcement. And everybody was like, where is Amari? Rhapsey had texted my mom and was like, tell her to come back. And so literally I come back, sit down, and I just hear my name, and everybody's like, omari, I don't even Know why? I'm just running up to the stage, like, what's going on? And Luan, who is an amazing, amazing black choreographer, she actually is from. She lives here in New York. She was like, you got nominated for the show. And I just started bawling my eyes out because I just could not believe that this was happening to me. And it's not every day you get an opportunity like that, especially being in Jacksonville, where we don't have a huge dance community that can lead you straight to that level. So it was definitely an emotional experience.

A (5:58)

I'm sure sometimes it feels like if you don't come from, like, one of these huge cities, then, like, the climb to do something creative and be recognized for that can feel so much more steep. I know you were born in Tulsa, which is, like, so crazy, because I'm like, I grew up in Tulsa.

B (6:14)

Yes.

A (6:14)

Tulsa girls, you know, making it big, doing big things. Come on.

B (6:18)

Big things. Yes.

A (6:19)

You have to be from LA or New York to be a star. And if it's in you, it's in you. And I think absolutely, you probably embody that just so thoroughly, the things you've been able to do. The way your resume really speaks for itself, it's like.

B (6:34)

It's like, dang. And that was a really big thing. Like, once I got the Monsters of Hip Hop show, God was able to really show me through that at a young age. Like, Amari, this is not about you. This is about how you are going to create a path for different people like me and from cities that, like you said, they're not from Atlanta, they're not from New York, they're not from LA that already has such a big name and backing behind it to let them know, like, no, it's possible. It's going to take some work, but it's not out of the norm. And I just love making the things that seem impossible.

A (7:14)

Possible.

B (7:14)

Possible.

A (7:14)

Yes. Because it takes work. It takes dedication. You're clearly very dedicated to what you do. Like you said, like we said in the bio. Oh, Virgo. Come on.

B (7:25)

I got a Virgo rising. Come on, come on, come on, come on.

A (7:31)

So we know of hard work.

B (7:33)

We appreciate it very much.

A (7:34)

And it also takes some faith.

B (7:36)

Yes.

A (7:36)

And I don't know if that's ever been, like, a shakier subject for you. Have you always felt like you really believed in yourself and your talent and your abilities to take you to a level like this, or did you ever struggle with that? Like, oh, I don't know.

B (7:50)

I was definitely raised Christian. Like, with my parents, like I was telling you earlier, before we started, like, their background at ORAU and going to a Christian college, being very heavily present in the Christian gospel world. So we have always been. It was always instilled in us from a young age that we have a higher calling and we have someone higher than us that is already directing our steps. And my mom let us know. All my siblings know that we were special. And she just knew. She birthed some kings and queens. I know that's right. And I was. So at that time, you think it's just your mom, right?

A (8:30)

You're like, you said it because you my mama.

B (8:32)

But as you keep on going, as I kept on going, I'm like, dang. For real. The favor I feel the favor I'm feeling it. I feel it. But has it always been this easy to believe in that and to believe the things that you can't see? Absolutely not. Like, it's been difficult for me because I didn't always see it. I didn't always see it, but I knew that I had to go. I had to keep on pushing forward and it will all make sense eventually, which it did.

A (9:02)

I love that you, even when you couldn't always feel it, you like that mark, though, that this sort of place in my mind, that destiny is still there. It's shining through. Even when things feel a little darker or more hopeless, maybe is a better way to put it, you still had that belief.

B (9:20)

Yes.

A (9:20)

Yes. So you mentioned Rhapsody. Do you have any other dance or performance choreographer type inspirations like that to share?

B (9:27)

Oh, my gosh. So Janet Jackson, Velvet rope, that 1994 Madison Square Garden. Like, I remember my dad putting that on, and I was just like, wow. Like, okay. When it came to just the way she moved, when it came to the way that she utilized her dancers and allowed them to be stars, you know, like Tina Landing, Shawn Eckhart, like, all those amazing people up there. Wade Robson, Rama Lama dance performance. Andy J. Homebros, west side Lifestyle. Chris Grant. Who else? Tanisha Scott, Shonique and Lissette Calvin Luther Brown. Like, the list goes on. There's so many amazing. Debbie Allen, Fatima Robson. Like, I really, when I look at those two, I just love how they use their career and use their presence. And I really learned on how you can evolve as an artist and it's okay. And it may feel like you're starting over, but you're not. You're just going into a new chapter of your life. And all those peoples and performances really set a standard for what I want to contribute to the dance industry, to the music industry, and really to the world, in the community. But in my own way.

A (10:47)

Yeah, I felt that I don't have anywhere near your talent. Like, let's just be for real and be forthcoming about that. But I felt that same way about Janet Jackson in the 90s. Like, oh, my goodness, what am I witnessing? This is incredible. I mean, really starting with, like, Rhythm Nation, I was like, what's happening to my senses right now? Like, what this black woman is doing with dance and movement and bodies is so empowering. And I know things have shifted quite a bit over the years as far as, like, diversity and what we see in dance, especially dance, which is typically looked at as a discipline for a very specific body type.

B (11:28)

Yes.

A (11:29)

Do you remember any sort of, like, unspoken rules about body image in dance that you maybe had to unlearn or push against at some point in your career?

B (11:38)

The list goes crazy. Honestly, I had. There was a lot I had to learn because coming to Jacksonville from Jacksonville, my background was a freestyle dancer. So I started with a West African group at our church, and then I went into Crump, a crump crew. Oh, literally. And so my. My mentor, Caben Grant, he had masters in dance, so he taught us all about ballet house, the different foundational styles. But I was still with the freestylers and I'm still with the guys. So coming to LA when they would put in the terms for the female portions, like body conscious wear and stuff like that.

A (12:20)

Wow.

B (12:21)

I'm not understanding.

A (12:25)

I'm conscious with a body.

B (12:26)

What you mean? Yeah, I'm me. So baggy clothes. Like, wearing baggy clothes was not a thing.

A (12:34)

It.

B (12:35)

It was all about tight shirt, tight pants. Like, I just did not usually I didn't even dress like that on the regular. So learning that makeup things that I had to push against, especially on gigs where they know who they hired. Right. So you know, the stylist got my picture and my measurements. We have no clothes to wear. See, and that would just be the most frustrating, humiliating thing because they already make you feel like there can only be one.

A (13:09)

Yep. Ooh, ooh wee.

B (13:11)

So out of like seven girls or eight girls, sometimes 10, 12 girls, I'm the only one. And that all plus size women do not. We don't look alike and we don't have the same type of bodies either. Like, I learned through Renaissance that the term is petite curvy.

A (13:30)

Oh.

B (13:30)

Because I'm five two, but I'm still versus like a woman. That's five, six, five, seven. That has the same measurements but she's taller. So it was just a constant fight and not to pushing against of not being like the ratchet girl or the funny girl. Oh and they, they put that on plus size people. Yes they do in general and it's just like no, no, no, no, no, no.

A (13:58)

You're so right. They do put that on plus size people. I feel like it's especially women and then the more marginalized you are, the more it's like you need to fit into this archetype of. And the funny girl is definitely one

B (14:10)

of those where it's like yes, I'm naturally funny but.

A (14:13)

But like I didn't come here and just stare down. I don't have a tight fi.

B (14:17)

I came here to be hot and overtly bust a move.

A (14:18)

Yes. Literally that. So do you feel like your presence, how has that shifted? Or when you listen to like the incredible amount of feedback that I know you must receive. Cause I've been following you on Instagram for a long time.

B (14:34)

Your comments are the Talking to me on your side. Ok. Like the people's princess. Sometimes I'm like what did they do? She deserves this.

A (14:43)

Literally. The people's az who you are the people's princess. How do you feel like your presence has shifted? What younger dancers believe is possible for themselves.

B (14:52)

I know it's made a big impact. Like nothing warms my heart. Going to Monsters of hip hop, the workshop I was talking about earlier and just seeing more than 10 or 20amazing. It's not even now. It's not even a thing of me having to count. Like it's just a normal thing. And to see just beautiful women in campaigns, in movies, having more artists have plus size dancers, not just men, but women as well, kids, it's, it's been very rewarding and I know it's not just because of me. Like even my sister Jeray Marshall, who me and her did a lot of gigs together and she did her own gigs. Alison Claire, like the list just really goes on. Noel Rodriguez. Like at that time me and them were the only few plus size dancers that were doing it. So with my contribution as well as theirs, I feel like it's really helped open up the door and make a lot of people of our community feel seen and comfortable.

A (15:56)

Did you feel like there was maybe a certain level of bravery or maybe that's not the best word but was there something you had to tap into as far as like I'm really about to be exposing myself and being visible in a way that I have not before, which means you're gonna be opened up to brand new levels of criticism and being picked apart.

B (16:20)

Oh, yeah, yeah.

A (16:21)

You had to face stuff like that.

B (16:22)

Oh, definitely. And I wanna make sure I shout out Paris Goble too.

A (16:25)

Oh, yeah.

B (16:26)

You know, our brown sister, Aunt Nikki, and she's just been doing amazing things. And with that, to answer your question, absolutely. Like, you have to be courageous and you have to have thick skin or anybody that may be considered a first because the amount of ridicule or just like laughter, people. And at that time, before I got my tooth done, I looked at my teeth. I used to have a crooked teeth too. So people would call me the thick girl that got the crooked with the tooth, you know? Yes. And wow, that did you know I was dancing with Pharrell. I was dancing with Beyonce. I was dancing with Missy, Lady Gaga with the toothpaste. I was just killing it. But I just, again, just already being tapped into my calling and the bigger picture and purpose for me. I knew I was going to have to walk it out. And if this is how God wants me looking, like as I step into this, it is what it is.

A (17:26)

Yeah. So that goes back to that belief and that faith in something maybe bigger than you at work here. Although you are called into this. You don't have to answer the call.

B (17:37)

I don't have to answer the call?

A (17:38)

You didn't have to.

B (17:39)

I just. I couldn't stomach not answering the call. Oh, I am not really good with what ifs.

A (17:49)

Okay.

B (17:50)

If I have the thought and it's really pulling me, I gotta do it. I gotta do it. I rather. I rather like, I'll feel better knowing that I tried versus succumbing to my fear and not trying at all.

A (18:04)

Right, Right. Yeah, I get that. Because you don't want to look back and say, if I had just pushed myself and done it anyway. But that fear of what people might say when they can really see you is strong and it holds a lot of people back. And you mentioned, you know, you have to be courageous, you have to have a thick skin. I feel like a lot of creatives, maybe most really struggle with having that thick skin. Because you're not just being criticized for your work. You know, it's not like, oh, somebody typed in an Excel spreadsheet and they don't like your formul. Yeah, you're criticizing my body, my movements, my ability, my talent.

B (18:37)

Like, this is me, this is you. And it's just like, dang, God, did he make a mistake on me?

A (18:42)

Oh, yeah.

B (18:43)

And so it Should. There was one. One. There's one performance that's sticking out to mind when it comes to this. So Paris. Back to Paris. It was Savage Fenty. I think it was volume three. It was after Amazon had taken it over.

A (19:00)

Oh, yes.

B (19:01)

And it was Nerd. And she had me start in the center. She was like, I just want you to shake and, you know, do all this hair choreography. Get the outfit. It's shooting day. It's a string.

A (19:17)

Of course it is. Cause Savage Fenty is panties.

B (19:21)

And I was. At that time, I wasn't as toned as I have been. And I was so self conscious. And I was looking at her like, you want me to do all that with this one? And she looking at me like, do it, babe. And I did it.

A (19:38)

I sure do.

B (19:39)

And just. I was so happy because the feedback I got from it, I was so scared that people were gonna tear me apart because I didn't feel. I knew I didn't have the body for that with that type of movement. And it was just so loving and uplifting. And so that was just another lesson for me. Like, Amari, like, sometimes we just gotta push past the fear.

A (20:03)

Oh, my goodness. Yes. I say all the time, sometimes we have to do it scared. Which is the worst? The worst and the best.

B (20:10)

Yes.

A (20:11)

That feeling when you're done, that sense of accomplishment. And it's like, okay, now I might log on. I don't know what I'm gonna see

B (20:17)

when I log on.

A (20:19)

But in this moment, I am so proud of myself for pushing through. You know, you have the talent. That's the thing. When the insecurities pop up, I'm like, you have to be able to lean on that, you know, is really solid and really there. And no matter what else may be going on, you know, Rihanna put out three strings and told you to put that on. She said, here we go. A triangle and some strings.

B (20:41)

Make it work. Can you see?

A (20:43)

But you knew, I'm sure that at the root of all of that is you have. You're not. You didn't just wake up and stumble into a Savage Fenty campaign. You put in the work.

B (20:53)

Absolutely.

A (20:54)

You have the talent and the ability to do this. It's just, are you gonna trust yourself to go out there and execute that part? And that can be very big. That can be very daunting for people on all levels.

B (21:05)

I really urge all creatives, when you have some things we know is not aligned, you know, if you have that gut feeling like, I shouldn't do this, but if it's A decision where it's just based on fear of insecurities of what people are gonna think.

A (21:18)

Yes.

B (21:19)

And how you may perform. Like, throw that out the window.

A (21:22)

Yes. Oh, my goodness.

B (21:23)

I forgot to shout out my sisters, the councilwomen. Those are my biggest.

A (21:27)

I was gonna ask you about the councilwoman. Okay, I'm gonna start later because I'm like this colle. Okay, okay.

B (21:33)

We're gonna give that. We're gonna give that a moment. I was like, wait, hold up. I forgot my girls.

A (21:36)

No, no, no. You're so right. And I think that's. It's important because a lot of times people just see a plus size body, no matter what it's shaped like or what it can do, what that person can do, and they automatically have these preconceived notions about it. What's something that you think people misunderstand about plus size dancers and their athleticism and ability?

B (21:58)

They think we don't have stamina.

A (22:00)

They do think that. Yes. That's a big one, babe.

B (22:04)

I was dancing on the stage for three hours in hills.

A (22:08)

You don't, you really don't wanna see me.

B (22:10)

When it comes to.

A (22:11)

You don't wanna see, like, I can

B (22:13)

go, you know, not being able to do floor choreography. Granted, I can't. Not all of it, but.

A (22:21)

But that don't mean all of us.

B (22:22)

Not all of us. All of us came. You know, like, we can run circles around people. I think it's just like a lot about endurance. Like, and they last. Are their limbs fragile and stuff like that? I'm like, no, there's big people that can do backflips, flips. Like, it's all about, you know, training your body and taking care of your body, stretching, being healthy. Some people are just naturally big. It's just. It is what it is.

A (22:50)

Exactly.

B (22:51)

But that doesn't mean that that should be an automatic, like, X about them before you even get to see them move. And I got that a lot. Like, people didn't think I could dance for a long time without getting tired. I'm like, girl, are you from Florida? I dance outside.

A (23:08)

I'm a swamp, baby. It's hot and wet outside.

B (23:12)

It's hot and we're going for blood. My caving grant, we would have like a six hour rehearsal, but two hours before we're doing full drill, like real sergeant with the heat on. Yeah, don't play.

A (23:26)

And when you think about it, that applies to everybody. But for some reason, when they see a plus size dancer, it's like, well, what about you? How'd you get here? Can you do this? It's like all these girls have to work out. All these girls have to watch what they eat. Everybody has to rehearse. Yeah, that's not exclusive to me. It's kind of ridiculous that you see my body and automatically assume I can't do something.

B (23:47)

Yeah, definitely. Got it all the time.

A (23:49)

Yeah, I'm sure you did. I'm sure you did.

B (23:51)

Let them have it.

A (23:52)

I was gonna. Cause I was just about to say. So when you are dealing with that sort of automatic assumptions and criticisms from people who don't know what they talking about, how do you protect your confidence? Because the criticism keeps a lot of people from even trying.

B (24:08)

Ooh. Having an amazing support group.

A (24:12)

Oh yeah.

B (24:12)

I always fall back on my family, my best friends, the ones that really know me, they really keep me grounded. I stay off of social media too, a lot.

A (24:23)

Smart.

B (24:24)

And I do a lot of affirmations. I listen to the word and to self help podcasts from people that I feel like I see myself in. And that really helps me protect my confidence. Because if I'm always on social media, always comparing, always reading, I'm gonna get too sidetracked. And. And I'm very intentional about what I watch on TV as well. Like there are my guilty pleasure shows, but for the most part we all have them, you know, but for the most part, I try to watch stuff that really feeds me positively and inspires my creativity as well.

A (25:03)

I love that because I think sometimes people are under the impression that what you believe about yourself is all that matters. And although that's huge and foundational, what you consume. Oh yes, like literally and figuratively has so much of an effect on how you start to think and feel about yourself. And so if you're constantly reading criticisms online of people picking apart your body or your abilities, and then you're watching TV shows where you don't see yourself reflected or people are talking negatively about somebody who looks like you that is eventually going to seep in and take hold in a way that you don't want it to. So I love that you're intentional about not doing that.

B (25:43)

Absolutely. I realized the music that I was listening to was keeping me down, like keeping myself, like my. It was really hurting my self confidence. And music videos, because music is a big part of my life. I love music. I pray to music, clean all the things. And so like you were saying, always hearing music where they're talking about having the skinny girl or the light skinned girl and then watching music videos where that Is the only.

A (26:12)

It's always that girl. Right.

B (26:14)

It really was doing something negative to my spirit because it's just. It was becoming harder to really believe that like, no, Amari, you are a beautiful black woman. You are enough in all those things. And so once I was able to identify that, that's when I started. I knew I wasn't going to cut those things out. But okay, maybe there's other type of music I can listen to or other type of artists that I can listen to and follow to. So that always helps.

A (26:43)

Right? Those things can't be like the dominant of what we consume because then you start to believe like, oh, I am. I'm not a leading lady. I can't be the romantic interest. I'm the sidekick. I'm the dark skinned best friend, you know, in the background or whatever. I'm the fat friend or however people want to phrase it. Things like that. Where it's like you actually start to believe that about yourself when all you see is that message being sent to you. Even if you know deep down you really don't believe that or even if you come from a family or a background, a home environment where you were really poured into.

B (27:16)

Yes.

A (27:17)

Once you get out into that world, it's good luck.

B (27:20)

And books too.

A (27:21)

Oh yes.

B (27:22)

I read a lot of books now. There's so many romance books where they have thick girls as.

A (27:27)

Oh yes.

B (27:28)

And I love them.

A (27:29)

Oh my God.

B (27:29)

Kenneth Ryan. I love. Oh my gosh.

A (27:32)

You should check out Stephanie Yeboas. She's a British, A black plus size British writer who's. I think she's written two or three books now. I think her latest one is like a romance. But you're right, there are so many more now where it's like not even just in the description, but let us

B (27:46)

see it on the COVID On the COVID I instantly. Anything that has. Plus I'm just like.

A (27:51)

I'm like, yep. I wanna, I wanna see black girl getting loved.

B (27:55)

And I want the muscular man shout out to my thickies. I love you too. But we love it. We love to see it. Yes, we do.

A (28:02)

I don't. You know, it's something about people who be in the gym and the way they just wanna holla at me so bad. I'm like,

B (28:11)

cause that. Okay, wait, we're about to detour. Cause that is a conversation. I just found out. Yeah.

A (28:17)

Oh, you just found out?

B (28:19)

Yes. Cause I was really like into skinny guys.

A (28:22)

Oh, girl, the gym daddies love you though. Love.

B (28:26)

Oh my God. I'm like.

A (28:29)

All this time I didn't know this.

B (28:31)

Me. Pick me up.

A (28:33)

Pick me up.

B (28:39)

Oh, my goodness. Thank you.

A (28:41)

Yes. It's real. It's real. This episode of Crystal's Couch is sponsored by Better Help. Most of us are really feeling the squeeze financially these days. 88 of Americans reported feeling some form of financial stress just a few months ago at the top of this year year. And I don't know about y', all, but to me it feels like things are only getting worse. We feel that stress in so many aspects of life and it can manifest as anxiety, depression, trouble sleeping, which opens up the doors to so many other health conditions, not to mention the tension it can place on romantic relationships and people we share our homes and lives with. I've been tracking my finances and sticking to a budget more closely than ever before. And the content cost of household basics for just me and Laney continues to climb. And financial conversations have come up more than once in my personal therapy sessions. 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But if you're not satisfied, BetterHelp allows you to switch to a different therapist at any time from their tailored recommendations. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help sign up and get 10% off@betterhelp.com Chrysal that's betterhelp.com. Hey y'. All. Lately I've been thinking a lot about where I want to be financially in the next few years. I really, really like. Big, big goal is buying a home here in New York City. But that obviously it's a big, big goal for a reason. That's gonna take a lot of very deliberate planning and, and utilizing resources to even begin to have a chance of happening. I mean, maybe you can relate or maybe you just want to move into a new apartment maybe next year or you'll be in the market for a new car or a new to you car. We all try to prepare by saving as much as we can, when we can. Okay? Emphasis on when. But getting those things also means getting your credit in shape now. And you can do that with ava. AVA is a credit building app that's designed to work fast and help your credit score where it really matters. So your score can start climbing with almost zero effort. Instead of a secured card that locks up a deposit and takes weeks, AVA can approve you in five minutes with up to a $2,500 credit limit and no credit check. You just pay your monthly subscriptions like usual with the AVA Credit Builder card and AVA reports your on time payments to all the major credit bureaus which helps you build solid credit history quickly. AVA members improve their scores by an average of 30 points in 30 days and it is the highest rated credit building app on trustpilot with the most five star reviews. You can take control of your credit today by downloading the AVA app. When you join using my promo code couch, you'll get 20% off your first year, monthly or annual. Your choice. Again, grab the AVA app and use my promo code Couch Couch so they know you heard it from me and you'll get 20% off any plan for up to a year. That's promo code C O U C H thanks to ava. Now go get yourself good credit. Crystal's Couch is brought to you by Squarespace. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help your business stand out and succeed online. Now Squarespace gives you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. Okay. From consultations to events and experiences, showcase your offerings with a customizable website. It's designed to attract clients and grow your business. You can get paid on time with professional on brand invoices and online payments. Plus you can streamline your workflow with built in appointment scheduling and email marketing tools tools. Now y' all know I have used Squarespace for years. I mean at least a decade for both personal and business websites including the site for this show Crystal's Couch with Squarespace's collection of cutting edge design tools. Anyone including me so I know y' all can do too. Anyone can build a beautiful professional online presence that perfectly fits their brand or their business. You can choose from a library of professionally designed and award winning templates Templates and then use their intuitive drag and drop Editing and beautiful styling options to make your website all yours. That was very important to me because I need to be able to update these sites whenever, with ease. Okay. Yes, I was part of the MySpace generation, but I do not remember all the code that I learned back in those days. And I don't want to have to try to relearn it either. Okay. Whether you just need a landing page or an end depth full service website, Squarespace has you covered. I've literally done both of those type of sites multiple times and it could not be an easier process. So head to squarespace.com couch for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code couch to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Let them know Chrysalis Couch sent you. So you were talking about how, like, sometimes you have to know when you're in any given situation. Like, is this really aligned with who I am, my character? Is this what I wanna do? Versus, you know, pushing past fear of being perceived. Have you ever turned something down because it didn't allow. Ooh, really?

B (35:09)

Oh, yeah.

A (35:09)

You don't have to name names if you don't want to. But I don't wanna.

B (35:12)

I don't want to.

A (35:13)

Cause I love them.

B (35:14)

I love them. And it was all, you come back

A (35:16)

around with something that feels right.

B (35:17)

Yeah. And it was very much like, love you ain't for me, though. There's still an image, you know, I want to protect for myself.

A (35:28)

Right.

B (35:29)

So it can range from the type of dance style to the words that this artist is.

A (35:34)

Oh, I know that's right. Yes.

B (35:36)

As much as I love to sing it in the club, doesn't necessarily mean I want to go on tour and be in the music videos and different things like that. And. And it's no disrespect. It's all love. Still support. Especially we Chocolate. I want you to win, but that doesn't mean that, you know, I want to do the job.

A (35:56)

Right. Right. That's real. And it can take some courage to do that too.

B (36:03)

It's scary.

A (36:03)

Yes. Cause it's like, are y' all gonna hold this against me now?

B (36:07)

Yeah, definitely. And there's always a way to go about it professionally and respectfully, like with how you deliver it, the words that you use, and still showing that support for them beyond this moment.

A (36:22)

Right. I try to be honest and gracious at the same time because I really am honored you asked. You could have asked anybody. And so, you know, most times it's like, thank you genuinely for considering Me. But this is not. It's not going to work out for, you know, whatever private reason.

B (36:40)

And it should be okay.

A (36:42)

It should.

B (36:44)

Especially for dancers, because we don't get that many opportunities. You just feel this need to say yes to everything. And I even played that game in the beginning, and I learned through that you don't always have to say yes. And it's all right. It's really okay. And that's where, again, faith comes into play. And having a mentor, someone in that realm that has done it before, that can give you real, honest advice that pertains to you and the vision that you. You have for yourself.

A (37:16)

Right. I love that. I feel like it's just when you're first starting out, you're so afraid that nobody else will ask again or you just got here. So it's like, why would I say no? You know, I'm trying to build up. I'm trying to get my name out, babe. Right?

B (37:31)

I'm broke.

A (37:32)

But when you get to a certain level of success and when you can define success for yourself, it's not really about what other people may think. Then I think it becomes easier to be like, this isn't really aligned with what I want to do at this

B (37:45)

point in my career.

A (37:47)

Maybe five, six years ago, I would have jumped all over this, but I've

B (37:50)

put in the work and it's okay.

A (37:52)

And I know as a Capricorn, you putting in the work, okay, because you don't get to. Again, you don't get to be a dark skinned plus size dancer from Jacksonville to being on stage with Missy and Pharrell and that Creole woman, Rihanna and everybody else without putting in a lot of work.

B (38:08)

A lot of work.

A (38:09)

So what I want to ask about the bigger sort of names you've worked with in general. What do you feel like takes to not just get in the room, get the audition, get the opportunity, but to stay in those spaces.

B (38:26)

Oh, and that's a big one. Because a lot of people get there and they quickly get put off.

A (38:31)

Right.

B (38:32)

Being respectful, being a really good person. I pride myself on my reputation of my character.

A (38:39)

Okay.

B (38:41)

And to be in big rooms like that, the sharks come out, so. And it's really easy to weed those people out. So I feel like just being a good person, being an honest person, trustworthy, incredible work ethic, having etiquette in some of these rooms. Like, we get there and we just don't know how to act. No, you gotta know how to act. And especially when you're in the room with those people. Where trust is a thing, that's usually an issue because just all the things that come with being a superstar of that level. So to stay people in those rooms had to really trust me to know that, like, whatever happens in here, it stays in here. And you don't have to worry about me going to social media or going to other people and bringing outside influences into the room. And so I feel it has a lot to do with character, but of course, still staying on top of my skills, you know, still being the best of the best and all those things.

A (39:46)

That sounds like a great deal of maturity as well. I'm not sure how many especially younger dancers are really at that level of like, I need to think about the bigger picture and not just how excited or whatever I feel in this moment, but like the bigger conversation of what I want to do.

B (40:05)

But it's hard because a lot of it comes from experience too. So there's a lot of things that I knew about certain rooms, but being exposed to them and other things outside of the industry too, helped me gain so much knowledge. So with within what I was doing in the industry, I was still putting on huge dance performances in South America at a very young age. So I'm learning. Oh. And then even before that, my first dance class that I taught was at 14 years old. So listen,

A (40:45)

you said, babe, I had to at a certain point, at the ripe old age of 14, at 14 year olds down and be like, y' all not getting it.

B (40:55)

You're not getting it.

A (40:56)

Let me get y' all out.

B (40:57)

The driving force was from that was I was tired of being broke, my parents could afford to give me money, and so I just had to get creative. Like, how can I make money? Okay, okay. What skills I got teaching? Let's go. But it was just like from a young age, I was already learning how it means to lead younger people, how to lead people, how to be able to articulate myself. It really shaped me from that age until onward. Really shaped me as a leader and a voice and how I want to be looked at in certain spaces, especially in spaces where I have to teach and be in a leadership position because. And I'm happy with the path. Beyonce came much later in my career. So I've already been through a whole lot of stuff. Things that work, don't work. And so by the time I got there, I knew, like, okay, this is how I want to walk into the room. And these are the different qualities that I need to have to stay in this room.

A (41:59)

Right.

B (42:00)

Yeah.

A (42:01)

I think we saw Some of that, you know, this sort of maturity and poise and confidence and discipline, really, the trustworthiness, even with you and Blue Ivy on stage, it's like, you know, there's a certain amount of trust that Beyonce is communicating that she has in you with you being, like, sort of a guardian on stage of her daughter. So I think you really hit the nail on the head of, like, so much of this comes with experience, and a lot of times we can feel like the doors are shutting in our faces, and we, you know, we're being turned away from the things we really want. But. But you just really don't know until you travel this path and you get rejections, you get knocked down, you get back up, you try again, you do more things. Like you said, you've been in different countries. You've been doing this since you were 14. You not new to this?

B (42:47)

Oh, no, not at all.

A (42:49)

Right. So when the biggest stars in the world come knocking, you walk into the room not only with this incredible talent and ability, but you know how to act.

B (42:58)

I know how to act. And it was just like, amari, we worked so hard to get here. Girl, we worked so hard to get here. We've sacrificed so much. We're not about to get fired for being late, right?

A (43:10)

Come on now. Earth Sign can't be doing that.

B (43:14)

I'm not gonna get fired from being late or being crazy. You know, like, no. Too many people have sacrificed so much for me to get to this point. I'm walking in sharp.

A (43:23)

Yes.

B (43:24)

Yes.

A (43:24)

And so even with all of that behind you, when you walk into the room with these girls and you have these new experiences with some of the biggest musicians in the world, what do you learn from being on that level of, like, discipline and excellence?

B (43:39)

Oh, it. I learned so much from everybody on just priorities.

A (43:46)

Yeah.

B (43:46)

And paying attention to detail. Like that Capricorn Earth game, like, just wanting to really be the best at whatever you do. It's just like, I was really, really studying, and their work ethic was just superb. It was just like, of course, you always have that one person in your ear that's like, you gotta do it. But for the most part, they want this because they truly want this. And they're gonna put in the work and really push their money, their mind, body, spirit, to its fullest capacity to be able to achieve those goals. And that was something. I always felt like that was me. But then to be next to people who took that to the next level, I was like, ugh. Got it.

A (44:33)

Okay, okay. Cause you were Already, you know, Badiana, I'm feeling good.

B (44:39)

But then you got other people in here that's.

A (44:42)

Oh, you like.

B (44:43)

Oh, oh, like shout out to Romy. He's killing it on Cardi B's tour. I love him. That's my boo. But I loved him in the Cowboy Carter rehearsals. Cause, honey, he was working out every single day. Like an hour and a half or four hour rehearsals running like five, seven miles. And then like my little sister used to live with him and their roommate. And just seeing how he was on a daily when it came to his health, like being around different creatives and artists that are doing the things that you see these icons doing, but they're obviously not a musical star like that. But just seeing that, it was just like pushing me. Like, Omar, I can't. People are really taking it there. Oh, yeah, Right. And that really inspired me to be my best self and always be setting healthy standards for myself as well.

A (45:35)

Yeah. I love that. No matter how accomplished you get, when you talk to people like you, who, it's like you are at like, the pinnacle. Like, you are just like, as far as I'm concerned, one of the top dancers, like, period. Thank you. And you have earned it. You've worked your way to it. But people like you always say, I'm not uncoachable, I'm not unteachable.

B (45:58)

Always a student. Yes, always a student. Because I just have so much to learn. And I love being inspired by the ones before me and the ones that, you know, are the newer generation. Like, it just always keeps me on my toes and just let me know that, like, this. The sky is the limit. Like, there's just so much to do out here. And again, just being around people that are making the impact.

A (46:24)

Right. So would you say that that sort of like this, this discipline that you talked about, do you feel like that's what separates the greats from the. From everybody else? I was gonna say the okays or the mediocres, but it's really, you know, it's a top tier group of people across industries, especially creative ones.

B (46:45)

They have their priorities in check.

A (46:47)

Gotcha.

B (46:49)

And to what's hard about, I feel just the entertainment industry. We have a lot of amazing artists out there, creatives out there. Not everybody has the opportunities or even the resources.

A (47:00)

Right.

B (47:01)

And the connections to help them get into bigger doors, you know, so for the ones that do make it end, you can quickly tell who's been waiting and who's going to take full advantage and who are really there. Like their Morals and values when it comes to this is very clear. Clear.

A (47:19)

Right.

B (47:21)

And yeah, I just feel those great. Their priorities in check. Their priorities are just so in check when it comes to just how they're taking care of themselves vocally, with their vocals, physically, mentally. Like, all of those things play a part. It's not always just about the music and performing on stage. Like, it's about how you're upkeeping yourself behind closed doors. How invested are you into your project, into your team, into. To your creative image? Like, those things play a part. And one thing I just learned from all, like Pharrell, Rihanna, Bea, Lady Gaga, Missy, Janet, they are invested in the whole entire thing. Like, they really do know what it takes to build this thing inside and out. And you don't see that a lot. Like, a lot of artists now, they amazing. Get a creative director or a team and just let them have free range and that's it. But there. And that's great. And it's amazing. But it is amazing. Even more amazing when the artist is just as invested to that side of things.

A (48:31)

It sounds like it's so much about what you do when nobody is looking, what you do when the deadline is not tomorrow, when you have some time in your private space when nobody's watching. It's easier to be disciplined when everybody is on your ass.

B (48:46)

Yeah, but are you disciplined by yourself? Are you gonna wake up and go to the gym? And I tell a lot of dancers, I'm like, y' all have the talent, but do you have all the correct skills to hop on stage and go on tour for seven to two years? You know, seven months to two years right now and. No, not yet. Not yet. There's a lot more things that you need to be maturing at and paying more attention to before you can really hop into that.

A (49:15)

Yeah, it's not. You don't just roll out of bed and onto stage with Missy Elliott. There's quite a few steps in between. B. Especially Missy, known for it. Like, please.

B (49:28)

And I tell artists, I'm like, okay, yes, you can sing sitting down.

A (49:32)

Oop, well. Oh.

B (49:34)

But now it's time to get up and move and dancing. You're out of breath real. And that makes sense. You know, it takes a lot. That's a hard job. Like, I love it. But there is work that has to be put into it it. Before you're on that level, to do it at that, you know, at that highest level capacity. And so it's just a lot of discipline that comes into play, and you gotta want it for yourself.

A (50:01)

Right, Right. It can't be mama's dream, daddy's dream. This has to be something that you're personally invested in, because otherwise that level of dedication and love for it won't be there.

B (50:11)

It'll be.

A (50:12)

You're just doing this because somebody.

B (50:14)

Yeah. We're not on stage with you.

A (50:16)

Right, Right.

B (50:17)

On stage by yourself.

A (50:18)

Right.

B (50:18)

So you gotta put in that work.

A (50:20)

Yeah. So when you are talking to these younger generations, what does it mean for you to sort of pour into them through your classes and programs? How does that feel? What does that impact like?

B (50:32)

It's very beautiful. I get emotional every time thinking about it because that's what's gonna live beyond me, you know, the impact that I made on the world. And. And it's not just with dancing as people. Like, people are the ones that are going to be speaking at my funeral, all these different things. And I want anybody that has ever met me to feel like I poured into them, even in the smallest way. And saying the impact with them was just, like, beautiful. And so letting younger people in the next generation know that it's possible and there's so many new paths that are ready to be discovered for them. It just warms my heart because I wish I had that.

A (51:13)

Yeah.

B (51:13)

And so I'm really just being who I've always wanted from when I was their age until now.

A (51:19)

Right.

B (51:20)

So that's really important to me because there's just not enough people letting them, you know, letting them know on that level and being willing to take the time to meet them on their level and let them know what's okay and what's not.

A (51:35)

Right.

B (51:35)

So that's really, really important to me more than just doing a job. It's like, okay, did I let these kids know that they can do this?

A (51:43)

Right. Right. Because it's not necessarily just about your personal accomplishments, but the legacy you leave behind, the impact you have on the people who come after you. What do you want those younger dancers to understand that you had to learn the hard way? Straight to camera.

B (52:02)

Straight to camera. Zoom in. P. Okay. I love. What's his name? He does that. I love. With the glasses. Oh, yeah, sorry.

A (52:12)

What is his name? Jordan.

B (52:14)

Yes, Jordan.

A (52:15)

He's so funny.

B (52:17)

It takes time. And one thing that I learned that I had to learn the hard way was knowing that I am enough. And as much as I try to, you're going to try and reach those standards that other people have placed on you. Wipe those away. You know, this is your path. And what happens to you along this path is going to be designed specifically for you and only some people are going to get it. And that is okay. But I want to let you know that you are enough and God didn't make any mistakes. Mistakes with you.

A (53:03)

Beautiful message.

B (53:04)

Yeah.

A (53:04)

Me at my big age over here, like, yes. God didn't make a mistake.

B (53:07)

He didn't make. No way.

A (53:08)

I was supposed to be.

B (53:09)

Come on, you got me on the couch, Scott.

A (53:11)

Yes, you on the couch.

B (53:14)

Thank you for having me.

A (53:15)

Let's talk about the councilwoman.

B (53:17)

The council, Cleopatra, Crystal Storm, Yoi, my girls.

A (53:22)

Oh, my goodness. So how did that. It's like a dance collective, right?

B (53:26)

Yes. So it's an all female dance collective founded by our amazing founders, Shia Patra, who I feel like is our Angela Davis.

A (53:34)

Instantly obsessed with that name. Love that. Shia Patra. Coming at ya.

B (53:40)

Yeah, coming at you. Coming strong. I've just always considered her like the Angela Davis of our community. She is very just like political and radical and just empowering when it comes to just black voices in general.

A (53:55)

Okay.

B (53:56)

And very, very, very intentional about creating spaces for black creat thrive to thrive, especially for black creative black women and being a voice for freestyle dancers as well and letting them know how far they can go in this industry as well. And so all of us have our own careers, our own past legacies, but we come together to do panels, performances, freestyle videos.

A (54:27)

Yes.

B (54:28)

It's just about empowering our community through our lens, which is through the freestyle lens and just showing different black and brown people coming together and just celebrating our music and our history and all of us have different styles, but it's just amazing how she just curated a group that just matches.

A (54:48)

Yeah.

B (54:49)

Like when you really set us apart, you can just tell that we're for the people. We do things for the people and just have big hearts. But we are gangsta SF and any male crew, female crew. I love y'. All. We gonna throw it down, you know, like, the mission is just to continue being a bridge and continue just shining light on black females in the industry, in the freestyle scene and industry as well. Because Yoi is an amazing dancer. You've probably seen her with Usher, Taylor Swift, like, all the things Crystal, she's been doing amazing work. Storm Princess of la, like, just, just shutting it down. Like, all of us have worked in the industry for a long time and it's been cool to come together as women and as sisters. We have real conversations, real check ins. We call each other out, like, talk about holding each other accountable.

A (55:50)

Love that.

B (55:50)

Oh, yeah, she'll set a goal and attention for the year. And she makes sure to do check ins and follow us to make sure we're staying according to plan and what we said we were gonna do. And I really love her. I see her like, as my mentor, big sister.

A (56:06)

Oh, yeah, High praise. The Angela Davis of your community. My goodness.

B (56:11)

Look, look. You see those videos? Talk about black power and speaking on things that, you know, really putting the pressure on black creatives to take back what's ours, even in the industry scene. And it's not just about, okay, reposting. What are you actually doing? What are you actually saying when you have the opportunity to. To say something? And I love that for her and I love have someone in my friend group that represents that because that keeps me on my toes and holds me, you know, makes me hold myself accountable for what I'm putting out into the world. You know, I'm for all people for sure. But I'm definitely know that there is still injustice when it comes to the pay grade.

A (56:54)

Oh, yes.

B (56:54)

The treatment, ownership. And just making sure that I'm advocating for those things in a very positive way.

A (57:03)

Right.

B (57:03)

But just know I don't play.

A (57:05)

Right. I can be positive about it, but I don't play with you.

B (57:09)

Come on.

A (57:09)

So don't play with me or my money or my things or my respect ever. Come on. I know that I'm not gonna keep you too much longer. I just have really one more real question. I know that, you know, as women, black women especially, so much of what we do is automatically devalued because they see a black woman doing it. So they like, must not be nothing, but do you ever feel like people see you dance and you make it look so good and because you are so good, it looks much easier than it is. Do you feel like people devalue what you do because you are so good that you make it look like anybody can do it?

B (57:49)

Yes. They be like, oh, yeah, come on with your little freestyle. You can do that, please. Yeah. And I'm like, girl, I'm putting in work, sweating. Like, it's not easy being five two and dancing next to five eleveners.

A (58:05)

I bet.

B (58:06)

Like, it is. It's a piece of cake. And I'm in a run club too. Oh, nice. And that helps me stay active. It is not easy. And yes, people be like, oh, you're just. Or if they think like, somebody's did it before, like, you can't. You could have, obviously actually be. I'm like. And a lot of people think it's Just like a gimmick.

A (58:27)

Oh.

B (58:28)

You know, like. Well, they just needed to have, like, quota. They needed a. A chocolate or a thick girl. It's like, no, I'm. I'm actually really good.

A (58:38)

I'm actually. When I'm on this stage, it's like the spotlight is on me.

B (58:42)

Yeah.

A (58:42)

Because I love to perform more. I'm that good.

B (58:44)

Yeah.

A (58:45)

And it shows. It really shows.

B (58:47)

And I see my. Myself as a star, as an artist.

A (58:50)

Absolutely. You look so joyous when you are performing. Yes.

B (58:54)

Oh, yes. I love it.

A (58:55)

It radiates from you. So I think sometimes we see greatness and we kind of get so used to it that we start thinking we, the regular, everyday people can do that same thing. It's kind of like when the Olympics come around and, you know, people are critiquing what these runners are doing.

B (59:12)

It's like, stop it.

A (59:13)

But then you see that video of, like, Jackie, Jordan Kersey or whatever running with the moms at her kids, and it's like, she dusted all of them. You get so used to seeing people at the top that you start thinking, oh, well, I could do that. I could do. Oh, maybe if you dedicated your whole life to it, you could.

B (59:32)

Maybe. But. Oh, I love to watch the marathon during the Olympics.

A (59:36)

Oh, yeah.

B (59:37)

I just have an obsession with runners. I think they're just beautiful and honey, but me, I'm like, I can dance for six hours straight, so you should be able to do this. I went to my first run club meeting. I said, child,

A (59:55)

jk, jk. I'll be back. This was harder than I thought it was gonna be. I'll be back. I'll be back.

B (60:01)

Three months later, I'm back.

A (60:03)

Oh, my goodness.

B (60:04)

Yes.

A (60:05)

Amari Marshall, thank you so much for being on the couch, for having me. This was incredible.

B (60:11)

We were really. Yeah. Yes. Yes.

A (60:13)

We got. I mean, before we even started rolling, we was.

B (60:16)

Yeah, we was at.

A (60:18)

We over here, like just two country

B (60:19)

girls just catching up, making it in the big city. Thank you. And thank you, too, for doing this and creating a platform for, you know, women like yourself that have a voice and want to shine light on other people that are doing really is needed. And it spelts. And it feels good to be in a place with another black woman. And you're just so beautiful. And you made me feel safe. You weren't trying to dig for nothing. It was very intentional and. And it's really good and refreshing, and I just, like, really pray for you and pray for this whole thing that it keeps on Expanding for sure.

A (60:55)

Thank you so much. That was really the intention behind the show was to facilitate spaces like that because I think it's so important for other people to hear and learn from those who have been through the fire, been through a lot, and have so much to share and serve as an inspiration, which I know you do to countless people. So thank you again for spending your time with me today. Please tell the people where they can find you guys.

B (61:22)

Go to my website, okay. Www.amarimarshall.com 2L's Instagram. Amari Monster Nasta Er okay with S T E R. You can find me there?

A (61:37)

Yes. Gotta check her out on Instagram. Posting incredible videos.

B (61:41)

Everything.

A (61:42)

Dancing and hosting parties and just being go gorgeous and incredible. I saw your beautiful sister on your Instagram. Oh, your nephew. What you wrote about your nephew. I'm like, same my nephew. I feel the same way. Crazy the way they crack your heart open.

B (61:57)

It's too much.

A (62:00)

I'm like, this is my baby.

B (62:01)

This is my baby.

A (62:02)

Take my money literally, whatever you want.

B (62:07)

I love you, Raphael. And if you're watching this, my nephew is selling. He's buying his bread and he makes the bread sourdough.

A (62:16)

I was about to say he's not selling that popcorn. All the kids are selling that fundraiser popcorn now.

B (62:21)

My cousin Jada does that too. Y' all buy her popcorn. But now he does sourdough bread with his mom. Shout out to you, Jade, and yeah, they be killing it. It's really good, actually. $20.

A (62:31)

I can't take these kids. I can't take it.

B (62:34)

Just entrepreneur for the young age.

A (62:35)

I'm like baby sourdough, of all things you got. That's a finicky.

B (62:39)

I'mma give you regular white bread and call. I'm coming out with the chocolate box. Okay. Right, Okay.

A (62:45)

I didn't forgot what that World's favorite.

B (62:47)

Yes. We call it a day, honey. Just creative.

A (62:51)

But thank you so much. Thank you. Appreciate it. I appreciate it. All right, y', all, that is gonna wrap up this week's episode of Chrysalis Couch. Make sure you follow us online at Chrysalis Couch. And if you have a question for me, send me an email. Advicerystlescouch.com we'll see you next week. Two Good and Co Coffee Creamers are

B (63:09)

made with farm fresh cream, real milk, and contain 3 grams of sugar per serving. That's 40% less than the 5 grams per serving in leading traditional coffee creamers for a rich, delicious experience. Whether you enjoy your coffee hot, cold, bold, or frothy, two good coffee creamers

A (63:25)

make every sip a good one. Two good coffee creamers. Real goodness in every sip.

B (63:31)

Find them at your local Kroger in the creamer aisle. You're here. But are you here here? You go to Hawaii in your head all the time. During meetings in the car. Hawaii is on the mind. But when you're ready to go, there's Expedia, the one place you go to go places. Flights, hotels, vacation homes, cars. You can say when you bundle or book as you go and still save. So what are you waiting for? Expedia, the one place you go to go places Members only Savings vary Starting a business can seem like a daunting task unless you have a partner like Shopify. They have the tools you need to start and grow your business. From designing a website to marketing to selling and beyond, Shopify can help with everything you need. There's a reason millions of companies like Mattel, Heinz and Allbirds continue to trust and use them. With Shopify on your side, turn your big business idea into Sign up for your $1 per month trial@shopify.com specialoffer.