Session 29 ft. Pour Minds

Summary

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Crissle’s Couch: Session 29 ft. Pour Minds (June 2, 2026)

Episode Overview

On this episode of Crissle’s Couch, host Crissle welcomes Lex P. and Andrea Nicole, the dynamic duo from the Pour Minds podcast, for a wide-ranging, hilarious, and deeply human conversation. They explore the journey from bartending to building a major media platform, discuss the ups and downs of public success, grief, internet culture, and staying authentic in the ever-evolving landscape of Black media. The discussion shares vulnerable insights into friendship, personal growth, and the reality of navigating fame, while highlighting the unique Southern flavor that sets Pour Minds apart.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Foundation of Pour Minds: Friendship & Hustle

• How Lex and Dre Met: Working as bartenders at a Houston strip club, initially just co-workers, their bond formed over sharing tips and navigating chaotic nights behind the bar ([01:20]–[02:37]).
  • Lex P.: “If you make the drinks, I'mma bust the money down with you. And that was the beginning of our friendship… Poor Minds essentially is the same thing.”
• Original Show Concept: Pour Minds started as raw, honest conversations about dating, career, and life as young Black women—recorded for anyone who could relate ([02:38]–[03:02]).
  • Andrea: “Being a young black woman trying to navigate life is just interesting as it is. And I think we were just being honest about it, and people gravitated towards it.”

2. Dating Realities, Atlanta Edition

• The struggle of dating in Atlanta: a skewed men:women ratio means competition is fierce, and even the “straight and single” pool is small ([03:12]–[04:54]).

  • Lex: “If you want to date a successful man…and not married, not DL…the pool is getting even smaller.”
  • Andrea: “A lot of the men are in their baddie era, passenger princess now… They want roses too!”

• The Internet “put men on game,” changing the landscape for everyone ([04:05]–[04:28]).

3. Southern Flavor & Breaking Media Boundaries

• The importance of Southern culture to their appeal is front and center. The authenticity of their speech, experiences, and openness about “taboo” topics in Black Southern families is a core ingredient ([05:58]–[07:37]).
  • Andrea: “There's nobody else that's doing podcasts right now that sound like us… In Black families in the South, it’s just so many secrets.”
  • Lex: “Our goal was always to create like a safe space… But it was hard for us in NY and LA, people didn’t like our voices.”

4. Family, Support, and Boundaries

• Both lost a parent in recent years and reflected on family reactions to their outspokenness and changing show ([08:06]–[11:37]).

  • Andrea: “My mom is very supportive…she’s always told me, you grown.”
  • Lex: “I made a public apology specifically to my aunt…Now they’re super supportive.”

• Impact of personal loss: Losing their parents motivated them to chase their dreams harder and influenced their show’s direction ([12:08]–[15:21]).

  • Andrea: “It lit a fire under me and made me want to stop procrastinating…start taking Poor Minds more serious.”
  • Lex (emotional): “I feel like I'm living the life that I know she's so proud of. But it’s like, dang, I wish she was here.”

5. Resilience, Consistency, and Public Pressure

• Keeping the show going despite tragedy, private struggles, public scrutiny ([15:21]–[17:48]).

  • Andrea: “You get to go to work and have bad days…when we show up to record, sometimes it be hard.”
  • Lex: “They be so street!…It better not drop at 7:01!”

• Facing “double-edged sword” of visibility and lack of grace from audiences ([16:45]–[17:48]).

• Navigating parasocial relationships and negative assumptions, especially online ([17:48]–[18:28], [22:00]–[25:50]).

6. Internet Fame: The Good, The Bad, and The Boundary Issues

• Dealing with fame and the loss of privacy; the awkwardness of being recognized everywhere—sometimes at difficult moments ([22:00]–[24:04]).

  • Andrea: “I don’t think, even when I thought about the show being successful…that I thought about that part of it…getting stopped at the grocery store.”

• The emotional toll and need for thicker skin ([24:24]–[46:59]).

  • Lex: “They don’t give us grace…A lot of things be hurting my feelings…do y’all not realize, like, I’m a human?”
  • Viral moments—fans combing through old content for “tea” or contradictions ([50:57]–[51:30]).

• Purposeful boundaries: Not sharing personal relationships or private family matters anymore ([48:29]–[49:25], [52:43]–[53:41]).

  • Andrea: “If Lex and I are having issues…we gonna keep that off camera.”
  • Lex: “People are so nosy…they find out who we talking about!”

7. Evolution & Growth (and Audience Backlash)

• Changing as individuals and hosts—audience sometimes resists when they “grow up” and the show matures ([36:36]–[41:29]).

  • Andrea: “Excuse me for elevating and working on myself. My bad for growing up, right?”
  • Lex: “I should not be the same 28-year-old as you watch…we have a large chunk of our audience who has grown with us.”

• Criticism for being serious, having guests, being “less fun”, etc.—but also for NOT evolving ([38:18]–[40:15]).

  • Crissle: “If you never evolved…then people would be like, these hoes 37 still talking about the shit they did when they was 29…”

• Importance of doing the show for themselves, not just the audience ([40:14]–[41:29]).

8. Black Women in Podcasting & Content Choices

• Discussion on policing Black women’s content—“Why aren’t you talking about X?”—and the breadth of Black media content out now ([41:29]–[42:47]).
  • Lex: “Instead of going to promote that podcast, you want to sit under our comments every week telling us how bad we are.”

9. Touring: The Reward of Community

• Touring as affirmation: connecting with their “poor crew,” seeing real-life impact, and feeling energised by audience love ([54:18]–[56:23]).

  • Lex: “Tour is when we get to see the people who actually love us.”
  • Andrea: “It’s a live version of what we already do…we call it a big slumber party.”

• The emotional highs and lows of being a public figure, how in-person reactions help balance out online criticism ([56:23]–[58:59]).

10. Favorite Tour Stops

• Shoutouts to Houston, Detroit, Chicago, LA, Dallas—every city has its own flavor, but Houston remains home ([60:05]–[61:16]).
  • Andrea: “Houston is lit every time…nothing like being at home.”
  • Lex: “Chicago is one of our other favorite cities…LA be lit.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “We used to call them Big Dick Ballers. We put a lot of people on game, but the guys were watching too.” — Andrea ([04:05])
• “There’s nobody else that's doing podcasts right now that sound like us…in Black families in the south, it’s just so many secrets.” — Andrea ([05:59])
• “My mom always told me, you grown and everybody is having sex. That’s how y’all got here in the first place.” — Andrea ([09:08])
• “I have questions, then I see people calling their mom…and I’m still like, damn, I wish my mom was here…living the life I know she’s proud of, but wish she was here.” — Lex ([12:47])
• “People just tend to forget that you're human and you're navigating life the same way that they are, but they just get to watch us do it.” — Andrea ([17:07])
• “We had to learn a lot about finances…Now we have a staff of about, what, 10, 11. We didn’t really have anybody to teach us how to navigate that world.” — Andrea ([43:53])
• “They don’t give us grace…do y’all not realize, like, I’m a human?” — Lex ([46:59])
• “I should not be the same 28…year old woman that you watch. But what I do appreciate is we do have a large chunk of our audience who has grown with us.” — Lex ([38:32])
• “You can't use tea that I gave you against me. You didn’t even know I was born in California because I told y’all that!” — Lex ([50:35])
• “It's hard when something is going wrong in your life and you got to pull up and record every...” — Andrea ([20:10])
• “I feel misunderstood all the time…people are committed to misunderstanding me.” — Andrea ([28:28])
• “I'm always excited to see the listeners…sometimes it does get overbearing…but if nobody cared, we wouldn’t be able to pay our bills.” — Lex ([22:43])
• “Tour is when we get to see the people who actually love us…they show up and show out. We have the best listener base ever.” — Lex ([54:18])

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Timestamps of Key Segments

• [00:01] – [03:12]: Origins of Pour Minds, Bartending Years, Early Friendship
• [03:12] – [04:54]: Dating in Atlanta, Internet Influence, “Baddie Era”
• [05:58] – [07:37]: Southernness, Family, Creating a “Safe Space”
• [08:06] – [11:37]: Family Reactions, Parent Loss & Growing Support
• [12:08] – [15:21]: Impact of Grief, Motivation, Balancing Public and Private Life
• [15:21] – [17:48]: Resilience & “Showing Up” Despite Struggles
• [17:48] – [25:50]: Fame, Internet Culture, Privacy Loss, Double-Edged Sword
• [36:36] – [41:29]: Growth, Change, Nostalgia, Listeners’ Resistance
• [41:29] – [42:47]: Black Women Content Creators, Social Media Critique
• [43:01] – [46:59]: Building Success Publicly, Managing Finances, Evolving On Camera
• [48:29] – [51:33]: Setting Boundaries, Protecting Personal Life & Friendships
• [54:18] – [56:23]: Touring, In-Person Feedback, Celebrating Community
• [60:05] – [61:16]: Favorite Cities to Tour

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Additional Highlights

• The hosts openly discuss the emotional pressure of keeping a public-facing show consistent, even during personal grief or depression ([12:08] and [15:21]).
• Andrea and Lex share strategies for protecting their families and personal lives in the social media age — including not posting certain family members and refusing to share relationship details ([48:29]–[54:14]).
• The joy of live touring—despite anxiety, sold-out shows and in-person love with their “poor crew” offer a profound sense of reward ([54:18]–[56:23]).
• They address the importance of growing with their audience, accepting you can’t make everyone happy, and encouraging listeners to find the podcast that fits them as people change ([39:55]–[41:29]).

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Where to Find Pour Minds

• Website for Tour Tickets: www.pourminds.com ([62:30])
• Social: @pourminds (everywhere) ([62:30])

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Crissle’s Couch continues to be a thoughtful, funny, and real space for challenging, validating, and caring conversations—this episode is a testament to the power of authentic Black women’s voices in podcasting.

Transcript

[A]

Hi and welcome to Christmas Couch, the show where I answer your questions for advice and talk to the most interesting people in the world. Today's guests are the voices behind one of the most influential podcasts in the culture right now. Poor Minds. Yes, Lex P. Andrea Nicole are straight out of Houston, Texas, and they have built an incredible platform through honesty, humor, and friendship. They say a lot of the things that a lot of people are thinking but are too scared to say aloud in front of others on camera, et cetera. But what started as conversations between two close friends became viral Moments. A TV show, one of the most loyal audiences in podcasting, and now a sold out live tour across the country. Ebony recently named them Creators Redefining Media. And that feels very deserved because they have absolutely created their own lane. So please welcome to the Couch, Lex P. Andrea Nicole.

[B]

Thank you. That was a good intro. That's probably the top intro he ever.

[C]

No, that was definitely the best one so far for sure.

[A]

This is your resume, though. Like, this is what y' all have built together. The show's been around since 2018, right? So talk to me a little bit about, like, when you look back now, what part of your early relationship or the beginnings of your friendship became the foundation for the show and who y' all are now today?

[B]

I think when I look back on the early parts of our friendship, we always love to say these. We started making money together when we first met. I. So it's only right that we ended up coming up with Poor Minds. And it's become a super successful show because when we first met, we were both bartenders at a strip club in Houston.

[C]

Love that.

[B]

Yes, girl. And we were getting to the money. Like, I think we were working together for a few months and we was like hi and bye to each other in passing. But we had never really had, like a full conversation. And then one night, we were working together behind the bar and we ended up just talking because this guy was asking me for all of these crazy drinks. And it was my first bartending job. I didn't know how to make drinks. I'm like, girl, you know how to make a drink? Do you know how to make this vibe? Marley this lemon drop? Cuz all I could do was henny and code.

[A]

I mean, like, it's a strip club, right? Why are you coming in here asking,

[C]

like, for real, like, you my girl too much.

[A]

You know you supposed to get henny and coconut.

[C]

Exactly. Literally.

[B]

So I asked her. She knew how to make it. And so I was like, okay, girl, if you make the drinks. I'mma bust the money down with you. And that was the beginning of our friendship. And so eventually, I. Poor minds kind of essentially is the same thing. Like, we was like, okay, we had this idea, we gonna do this together, and when we start getting to this money, we gonna bust this down, too.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I think a lot of it was us just really navigating life, like, living in Atlanta. She had been there a year before me, and we were trying to date, figure out what we wanted to do with our career. So we would just literally press record and talk about it. And I mean, being a young black woman trying to navigate life is just interesting as it is already. And I think we were just being honest about it, and I think people gravitated towards it. Cause they', oh, my gosh, me too.

[B]

You know what I mean?

[C]

So, yeah.

[A]

Especially with the dating aspect. I feel like a lot of women complain about dating, especially in Atlanta.

[B]

Yeah, they do. And rightfully so.

[C]

Rightfully so.

[A]

Are things any better in that regard? Do y' all feel like, you know, it's not so bad now the game has gotten a little. No, I feel like Atlanta is.

[B]

I don't know. I think Atlanta is one of those places where the men to women ratio is all. And then, especially if you want to date a successful man and you want to date somebody that's not married, not DL.

[A]

They asking for a lot.

[B]

You asking for now you asking for. Like, the pool is getting even smaller. So I think it's just a lot of men out there in comparison. I mean, it's not as many men out there in comparison to the women. And so it just makes it difficult to date out there because the men got so many options.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. And a lot of the men are in their baddie era, too. Like, they want to be the passenger princess now. They're like, what about me? I like roses, too.

[A]

I'm like, where did this happen? Who gonna be the boys? Exactly.

[C]

It's a lot of that going on. But I'm not gonna lie. I think a lot of it has to do with the Internet and the conversations that we had. Especially us. I mean, we were talking about bdbs back then. We used to call them big dick ballers. We were talking about the things that guys would do for us and, like, you know, stuff like that. And we put a lot of people on game, but the guys were watching, too.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So now they're like, oh, okay. So, yeah, it's a lot different now.

[B]

Dating is

[A]

so Dating hasn't really gotten Better than men have maybe gotten a little more hip to what y' all have going on.

[B]

And so it's a little more sassy.

[A]

I can see how, especially in Atlanta, where it's so many beautiful, successful, talented women, where the 10 straight single men there are like, oh, please.

[B]

Yeah, she said the 10 straights.

[C]

Literally.

[A]

Literally straight and single.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Cause I know the married men, they be single, too. They be the most. Oh, my God. I swear, Scottie BIE came on here, and she was like, if a man seems super single, he is the most married.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Whole family ever.

[B]

Absolutely.

[C]

Entire family.

[B]

I could not agree with that more.

[A]

So yalls appeal, I think. I mean, just sitting here talking to you, it feels like I'm talking to, like, my cousins. So I know when people listen to your show, they feel so tapped in. They're like, oh, my God, these are my girls. Yeah. How do you feel like your Southern ness adds to the way y' all communicate and connect with people? Cause I'm from Oklahoma, so I'm literally talking to y', all, you know, like, most of my family is in Houston now, so literally talking to me, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

It's like, so and so. A lot of people tell me, like, oh, my God, you so country. Oh, my God, you sound like you just fell off the back of a pickup truck. And I'm like, so. You know, it adds something to my content. I know that. So I'm wondering how you feel like your culture, your background adds to the things you have to say and the dynamic on the show.

[C]

Oh, go ahead, Go ahead.

[B]

Okay. I feel like it adds to the appeal because, number one, we just country as hell. Like, when we talk. Like, one of the main things people are always commenting on on our show is my voice. Like, they always, like, draya, your way you drag your words, the Southern draw. So I think that definitely adds to the appeal, because there's nobody else that's doing podcasts right now that sound like us. But then on top of that, we're just Southern girls, and we come. We both come from really good families. And in my family, talking about a lot of things was just so taboo growing up. And so I think now that we have our own podcast and our own platform, I just really like to dig deep and talk about a lot of those topics that people make you feel like you should be shunned for talking about. Especially in the South.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Cuz. Because I feel like in black families in the south, it's just so many secrets.

[A]

Stuff you don't talk about Publicly, especially.

[B]

Right, right. And so I feel like our podcast kind of gives people a space where they can talk about it and have their own conversations off camera about it with they friends too.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Our goal was always to create like a safe space, you know, for people just to feel like you can write in, get advice from us, you know what I'm saying? Live shows, you can really talk to us. So I think that it does help. But a lot of times I feel like it was hard for us to kind of get in like the New York and LA market because they didn't like our voices. They were like, oh, my God, I cannot listen to this. And I'm like, it's not that bad.

[B]

You know what I'm saying?

[A]

As an hour or so goes by

[C]

on the episode, you get used to it.

[B]

Right, right.

[C]

So I think now, like people in the west coast and the east coast, they're kind of used to our voices now after a while. Yeah.

[A]

Well, I tell you what, they might not. It might be a little hard on a podcast, but if y' all wanted to come up here and find some men, you would have no trouble at all.

[B]

Oh, that took me so long.

[A]

Baby, baby, you do not have to talk for too long. They gonna start batting them eyelashes.

[C]

Take a picture book.

[B]

I'm telling you, New York.

[A]

Yes. Literally, that. So you mentioned both of you coming from these great families, supportive families. Do your families listen to the show? How do they feel about it?

[B]

So my dad passed away in 2020, but I still have my mom here. And girl, she comes to all of our live shows. She has been in the studio when we have filmed the episode. Actually, we filmed the episode with Charlamagne in December. And she was there and girl, we was talking about some crazy ass shit and she was just sitting there cracking up. So, yes, my mom is very supportive. A lot of my family members are supportive. Like, they come to our shows in Houston all the time and some of them not so much, but I get it, cuz, you know, they a little more religious and into the church and they just be feeling like clutches. Pearl, this is too much for me and I respect that and I understand. But my mom, she's always told me, at the end of the day, you grown like you're grown and everybody is having sex. That's how y' all got here in the first place. That's how we all got here. And she be like, some of our family members be acting like they wasn't doing the same stuff that you be talking about on your show. When they were younger. And that's why it doesn't bother me. Because I was young at one point, too. And I remember what that, like, I support it and I love you either way. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I think for me. Cause I'm a little more open on the show. So in the beginning, like, I had moments where I was, like, putting my family business kind of out there. So it was like. And I didn't realize. Cause at this point, the show was big, but it's, like, nowhere near where it is now. So I'm just talking freely. And then it was getting back to my family, and they were like, excuse me, like, what's going on? So it was a moment where it was like, okay, we don't really like this, and you're doing this for nothing. Telling our business for nothing. Cause the podcast ain't doing nothing. But then it's like, as I became more aware of what I was saying on the pod. And then, you know, I made a public apology specifically to my aunt. Cause we had a moment where I said something too much, and I made a public apology. And I was like, you know what? Let me just be careful about what I say on this show. But now they're super supportive. My aunt, my uncles, My mom passed away in 2022, but before then, she was extremely supportive. My sister, they all love it because I've always been a loud, outgoing person. So thank God she can do what she's already gonna do and get paid for it. So they're super supportive.

[A]

You know, I feel like I relate to both of that. Definitely. There was an element with my family of, like, that girl been running her mouth, literally. I'm not shocked that she get paid to talk, because she been talking like, this is her lane. But then also it was like, at first, like, my cousins would maybe come to a show or something like that, but it's like, they all have kids, they deep in the church, you know, so it was like, I can't do

[B]

too much with your show.

[A]

But, you know, that's my cousin, and I love her, but not too much.

[B]

You know, it's a bit much for them. And I understand. Like, I had to actually have a conversation with one of my uncles recently because we about to have our show in Houston next weekend.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And the last show that they came to, which was in 2023, him and his wife, she was like, I love her. I love Drea, but I can't. I can't come to no more of these Charlottes. Like, this was a lot and so I had to let my uncle know, like. Like, look, it's been, like, three years. We've grown a lot. The show is still gonna be a little crazy. I mean, we might say some crazy stuff, but it's not gonna be as rambunctious as it was last time. Like, I think it's safe for y' all to come. And so

[C]

theme show, too.

[B]

It was. It was the.

[A]

The worst show for auntie to be at. Yeah, it was, girl.

[B]

She said, I can't.

[C]

It was a lot. It was. But it was fun.

[B]

It was fun, but she said, I'm gonna just support from afar, but they gonna come. She said she gonna give it another chance.

[A]

Oh, Lord, I feel like that's me sometimes. Like, ooh. Sometimes I gotta let the young girls have this. Like, ooh, ooh, ooh. Andy can't do that. So, both of you. I think I just heard both of you say that you've lost a parent in the past few years. Do you feel like, first of all, I'm very sorry. Thank you, both of you, for that loss. But have you felt like it has affected the way you approach doing the show or being in as a. Like, a public. Public figure?

[B]

I wouldn't so much say that. I just feel like my dad's death impacted me in a way that just made me feel like it's important for me to live my life and chase my dreams, because you just never know how much time you have. Like, my dad had been sick for a while, but it was still unexpected for me and my mom when he passed away. And it really just lit a fire under me and made me want to stop procrastinating and just start taking poor minds more serious. Because Lex and I were being consistent. But I don't know that I looked at it like it was gonna be the big thing in my life that took me to that next level at the time. And so when that happened, it just made me really wanna go hard.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I think it's the same for me. It was like, when my mom passed away, it's like my world stopped. And it was right before we went on our second tour. So it was like everybody was like, oh, my gosh, are they still gonna go on tour? And I just remember just, like, having a dream, and my mom is just like, if I would have not did the tour or stopped doing poor mine, she would have been so furious at me. But I do remember growing up, my mom was always preparing us and being like, one day I'm not gonna be Here one day. I'm not gonna be here. She was always that type of mother. So I felt like whenever she passed away, I wasn't ready mentally. But I knew I was prepared to handle everything that I had to do. And it's like, still in life now. It's like, I have questions. Then I see people calling their mom, like, mom, what is this? And I'm still like, damn, I wish my mom was here. Cause I don't know what to do. I don't know how to figure it out. But it's like I'm figuring it out, and I just give myself grace. Cause sometimes I will have a breakdown. Cause I'm like, I need to call my mom. And I can. Ooh, sorry. I don't get emotional, but it's like, it's still so hard because I feel like I'm living the life that I know she's so proud of. But it's like, dang, I wish she was here. And, you know, people be like, oh, well, she's here in spirit. But it's not the same. It's like, it does make you feel a little better, because I do feel like her. Andrea's dad are, like, up there pulling some kind of strings, baby. Yeah. Because, I mean, the success that we have seen is so amazing, but it's still a journey. You know, it still feels fresh. It still feels unreal. But I think it has, like, she said, put a fire in me to, like, just keep going. And it's like, I kind of feel like I have to step up and be that person in my family that just provides and does everything. So it's definitely a journey. Grief is a journey, and it feels different every day. And that's what I've learned as well.

[B]

Well, it does 100%. Like, I definitely kind of piggyback off of what you just said. I definitely, girl, think that they up there pulling some type of strings. Because the way that the show just simultaneously started taking off right around the, like, I feel like we had, like, this big spike when my dad passed away. And then same thing happened when her mom passed away, too. And that was, like, our first major tour. I had to go and record a episode of Poor Minds the day that my dad passed away. And I didn't want to talk about it on the show yet, so I had to, like, keep it together. And I didn't talk about it until, like, three months later. And still to this day, when people go back and watch the episode, they, like, I don't know how you did that. And to be honest, I don't either. I just think you get your. I don't know, it's like you get your strength from different sources when things like that happen and you're stronger than what you think you are.

[A]

Yeah, it's. It's interesting because you know, when you are. When you have. When you work in entertainment, you are expected to go perform even when the worst things are happening to you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So you just said that you went and recorded Poor Minds, like, the day your dad died, y' all recorded the show. That's the sort of thing where it's like, I've been in similar situations where, like, my personal life is falling apart, like horrible things are happening. And still every Wednesday I have to go be clocked in and on that mic and ready to talk about, you know, Adele or whatever. And so it just. Do you feel like you have learned a new level of resilience by having a show and putting the work in to have it be so popular? Because you all have been around for a while now, so you understand how a lot of people look at podcasting and they go, oh, I can do that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it look easy when people who are good at it are doing it, but you. You don't really know until you're in it. The amount of dedication and work that it takes to keep a show going, being consistent and showing up even when things are hard. Yeah. Do you think that doing Poor Minds for as long as y' all have has given you a new level of resilience?

[B]

For sure, I definitely think that it has, but it's like a double edged sword for me at the same time because I think it's made me tougher, it made me stronger. But sometimes I hate that people don't give us no grace either, though. It's like they tend to forget, and I'm sure you can relate to that as well. Like, people just tend to forget that you're human and you're navigating life the same way that they are, but they just get to watch us do it.

[A]

Right? Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I think that's. I think it's a lot of. Sometimes it's like y' all get to go to work and have bad days where your hair messed up and you not in a good mood. But it's like when we show up to record, sometimes it be hard. We had a bad day. Me and my dude may be getting into it or. Or something may be going on at my house. Something done broke down, my car done broke down. Anything could be going on. And it's like, we show up and we're trying to give 100%, but we got a million things on our mind. They're like, oh, my God, they're fighting today. Oh, Lex can't stand Dread. Dre can't stand Lex. But I think one thing that we've learned to do is, one, have tough skin. But two, like, we don't care about the comments. Cause y', all, when I tell you it's fan fiction in them comments, they

[A]

will create a whole story.

[B]

I saw the Lulu.

[A]

It's almost funny to read stuff that

[C]

people call it crazy.

[A]

Where did you even get this?

[B]

Insane.

[C]

Insane.

[A]

Yeah. Hearing y' all talk about that reminds me of Meg Megan Thee Stallion, just ending her Broadway run early after everything happened with that ex boyfriend of hers and how so many people were upset about that. And it's like, on the one hand, I get it. You know, you pay for tickets, flights, hotels, stuff like that. On the other hand, it's not a solo show. Understudies go on every day on Broadway productions. And that girl is only human.

[C]

She's only human.

[A]

It just feels like when you're an entertainer, people feel like you should be able to put whatever you have going on to the side and just get over it for the sake of going out there and putting on a show. But sometimes it don't work like that.

[B]

It doesn't.

[C]

Duran Bernard, when he came on our show, he was talking about how taxing Broadway is.

[A]

Oh, yes.

[C]

He was like, it's taxing already as it is. You have to go on three, four, five, six times a week, sometimes two, three times a day. And then, you know, you just found out somebody who you loved thought you were gonna get married. Completely betrayed you, Right? I know. When I had a regular job, I found out one time I was getting cheated on while I was at work,

[A]

and I was just struggling to serve them damn wings, the whole shit.

[B]

I'm like, oh, my God.

[A]

Like, I can't believe this just happened.

[C]

So to me, it's like, give people grace. And I think that the whole culture of celebrity gossip has gone so far where we just treat people like they're just a figment of entertainment and that's it. And we forget that these are human beings. So when she left Broadway early, I'm like, good for her. Because she probably knows how to take care of her mental a little bit better from her last fiasco that she had. So if she understands how to get ahold of that, and she let the world know how, you know, she was having moments of being suicidal in this. Let that girl take a break.

[B]

Okay. She just needed that break. And like, I'm glad that now we're in a space where we could do that because I think that situation with my dad was something that really taught us, like, okay, maybe we need to start batch recording just in case something does happen. Then we can have like that week off, those two weeks off to just kind of take a break and recollect ourselves. Because it's hard when something is going wrong in your life and you got to pull up and record every.

[A]

Oh my gosh, it is. And I think it's an interesting balance between, you know, when you're an entertainer, you have your own show, you do have to be consistent. The audience has to grow. They have to be able to trust that the show's gonna come out. But when you've been in it for years, you would think that if I need to step away for a couple of weeks, that that would be okay.

[B]

Maybe they don't wanna hear that.

[A]

They not trying to hear that shit. They be like, it's seven o'.

[B]

Clock.

[A]

Where is my damn show?

[B]

And it better not drop at 7:01.

[C]

Oh, girl, I was just about to DM you, Lex.

[B]

They don't play. They be so street.

[A]

Yes. It's sort of like a thank you. I'm so happy that you connect this much with the show and you love it this much. But like, girl, I am just a person.

[C]

What's going on over here?

[A]

So that's just part of the game. And it's something that you really only have to deal with when you're successful. So that's why it is that double edged sword.

[B]

Yeah, it is.

[A]

If nobody cares, then we go. Maddie with kills. So as we're sitting here talking about it, is there anything that y' all think success has given you that like you didn't quite expect? Or on the other hand, something that maybe it took away from you that you like, damn, I missed. Because like, for me, I, it's. I'm constantly doing this. Like, I love y' all so much. Thank you so much. I appreciate how much y' all love me. And sometimes I just want to be at the club or whatever with my friends. Like, I did not come here to do like a public appearance. Like, I feel bad for saying like, oh, I'm not taking pictures tonight or something like that. But it's like I kind of just want to be a regular person. Yeah. And it's like I'm not trying to. You know, I'm not sitting up here acting like I'm Beyonce or nothing.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

But, like, people do recognize me. They come up to me. They talk to me. It's like, I'm with my nephew, man.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

So, yeah. Do y' all feel that same way about success?

[C]

I think for me, it's like, I be surprised that people care so much about my personal life. Like, they be wanting to know every little thing. Oh, who is this friend? I've never seen Lex with her. Well, who is she dating? Who is he on vacation with? I'm like, oh, yeah. I just never thought that people care so much. So I think that aspect of it I haven't gotten used to. And then, like, as far as people taking pictures with me, I have learned to, like, getting this mind frame of, you know what? This person probably is not gonna see you again. And they're just taking advantage of the mom. Excited to see you. And I just kind of. I'm always excited to see the listeners. Like, sometimes it does get overbearing because it was, like, one time we were at the Mona Leo concert, and they literally had to do a barricade around.

[B]

It was a lot. It was a lot.

[C]

We do get overwhelmed. But again, I try to stay in the mind frame of, this is a blessing, because if nobody cared, we wouldn't be able to pay our bills. So.

[B]

Yeah. And I feel like I share the same sentiment as you. Like, it's just the privacy factor that sometimes is hard for me to deal with, because I don't think that even when I thought about the show being successful a few years ago and I could tell where it was going, I don't think that I thought about that part of it. Like, I didn't think about, like, oh, you can't even go to the grocery store without getting. Stop. Like, I. I had talked about this on another podcast that we did. One time I was in cvs, and it was, like, a few years after my dad passed away, and I was on the phone with my mom having a mental breakdown. Like, I was crying, and this girl just walked up to me. She was like, oh, my God, can

[A]

I get a picture?

[B]

And I'm like, yeah. And so I applaud you for even being able to, like, just tell people no, because that's something that I need to work on. I have never, not once, ran into somebody that listens to the show and told them no, because I just always feel bad because I feel like, especially more so for me, people try to always on our show kind of create this narrative that, like, I'm. I'm, like, stuck up and bougie and stuff. And so I even more so feel like when I run into people in person, I just gotta be like, oh, yeah, let's take the picture. Even if I'm not in the mood.

[A]

Right. Well, so sometimes for me, it's. I mean, yes. Sometimes it's like, girl, I'm not in the mood. Or like, if you catch me at 8 o' clock in the morning when I'm looking crazy with a bonnet on, walking my dog, like, do you really think I want to take a picture right now?

[B]

Right.

[A]

But for me, that thought in the back of my mind is, oh, they gonna think I'm ungrateful.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And they gonna get on TikTok.

[B]

I ran into Crystal, and she was rude as hell. Yeah.

[A]

Didn't even want to speak. And it's like, oh, my God, like, forgive me for being human. And it's tricky to even have this conversation publicly because people will hear this and be like, ugh, you're so ungrateful. Oh, my God, they gonna clip it.

[B]

We might as well get ready right now.

[A]

Oh, my gosh, Poor y'. All. Y', all. You're so popular. People take pictures of y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

Oh, my God, it's so hard to be Crystal. Alexa Drown. It's like, okay, girl. Like, you can't even talk about it. You really, like. It's really conversations that happen offline amongst certain circles because it's like, you can't get on the Internet and talk about the downsides of being successful. Cause people be like, well, bitch, give it up, then trade places. Like, I didn't say the bad outweighed the good. Right.

[C]

But.

[A]

But how is it that I can be reasonably expected to not talk about some of the things that are hard? And it's really an adjustment more than anything else. Right. Y' all have been at it for a while, so you've seen the growth and you've seen how things change. But like, any of those people who are, you know, responding in that way, if they were in the same situation, they would find it hard to adjust.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

It's a natural way of living.

[B]

It's not.

[C]

And then I don't even look at us as, like, celebrities for real. Like, I just feel like. Like, not that we're just podcasters, but I don't know. I just don't feel like a celebrity. So it be so weird, like, when people come up to me and be like, I'd Be like, I be like, me.

[A]

You talking to me? Look around like, is somebody else call me. I know. They be like, oh, my God. I be like, who here, girl? Yeah. Wait.

[B]

I be like,

[C]

who am I next?

[B]

It's shocking. Yes, it's shocking at times, especially sometimes, like when you run into the occasional crier. It be like, oh, my God. And then I don't know what to do. I'm like, okay, all right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Give me a hug.

[A]

Yeah. This episode of Crystal's Couch is sponsored by BetterHelp. For some people, summer is their favorite season. Travel picks up, the kids are out of school, and adventure is the first focus. But for others, juggling it all can be tough and can lead to overwhelm and counting down the minutes until those kids are back in school. And many people worry that they're wasting the days of sunshine. For me, summer is my favorite season. I love the long days, the warm weather, hanging out with friends and exploring everything that my city has to offer. But mental health issues don't just vanish because it's nice outside. So I still have to be mindful about taking my meds, getting plenty of sleep, and staying hydrated and active. When we build in time for ourselves, we feel more confident and are better able to understand our needs. Therapy is great for helping us establish good habits. And regularly meeting with a therapist can help you manage whatever feelings may come up for you during this time of year. BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform with over 30,000 fully licensed therapists ready to support your overall well being. Now, BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. You just fill out a short questionnaire that helps identify your needs and preferences. And our 12 years of experience and industry leading match fulfillment rate means we typically get it right the first time. But if you're not happy with your match, switch to a different therapist at any time. From our tailored recommendations. You don't have to say yes to everything. This summer, find support in therapy, sign up and get 10% [e-mail] Crystal that's BetterH. E-L-P.com C-R-I S S L E so when you have the kind of show y' all have where you're very open, you're very self aware, do you find that there's like a common misconception that people have about you or things that they misunderstand about you?

[B]

I feel misunderstood all the time.

[C]

Really? Yeah.

[B]

But it's always been that way for me. I feel like my whole life, like, ever since I was in. In school, like, growing up, I just always felt misunderstood by people because I think people be committed to misunderstanding me. And then I'm a very confident person. And then I always have my own opinions about things. I don't necessarily go with the popular opinion. So then they be trying to say I'm a contrarian. Bitch. Am I a contrarian? Or do I just have my own opinion? And this is how I feel about the shit.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

And it's okay.

[A]

It is.

[B]

But people will always think that I think that I'm right about things. And I also just feel like when you have a certain aura and again, you exude confidence, it rub people the wrong way. Because I feel like most people are not naturally confident in themselves and believe in themselves the way that I do, and I just think it rub people the wrong way. And then when you add on top of that that you kind of got like a. I don't give a attitude that really rub them the wrong way. But I'm such a sweet and kind person and genuine person in real life to all my friends, my family. And, like, even when we run into listeners, listeners always fall in love with me. They be like, oh, my God, you're so sweet and so kind, and it let me know you probably thought I was y. Would you say that?

[C]

Why would you say that?

[A]

Why would you say that?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. And it's just like, I don't know. To know me is to love me. And I feel like I'm just. I'm a very honest and vocal person, but people have a lot of misconceptions about me from the show. Yeah.

[A]

Okay. What about you?

[C]

I think for me, being that I'm such, like, an outgoing person, and I'm like, the loud one, the goofy one. I'm always cracking jokes. I think people expect me to be, like, the. That 24 7.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So sometimes when people meet me in person, my energy, it's not that it's low. I'm just chilling right now. Dre knows me. I'm a sleeper.

[A]

I was sleeping on the car all the way here.

[B]

Yeah, I love a good nap.

[C]

I'm a very, like.

[B]

She was knocked out.

[C]

I really am. I don't want to say introverted, but I do like to spend a lot of time alone. I like to relax a lot. So I think a lot of times, people expect me just to be, like, tap dancing.

[A]

Crack a joke.

[C]

Next.

[A]

Crack a joke.

[B]

Say ho ass, nigga. Yeah. Say this.

[C]

What you be saying on something, say, shut up, girl. I'll be like, girl, I'm trying to body.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I think a lot of times people expect me just to be like on 10 all the time. Or sometimes if we film an episode and I'm just chilling, they're like, oh, what's wrong with Les? She's in the bathroom. I'm like, no, I'm just chilling today. And then let me warm up. Maybe I just woke up. Maybe I just got here to the studio. You don't know what's been going on. So I think a big misconception of me is that I'm always on 10, I'm always being loud. And I think sometimes people even think when I am being loud that I'm trying too hard or I'm doing too much, but I'm like, this is literally how I am when I'm turned up. Even when the cameras are on or off, I'm literally like this, like all the time. So even when I am being my normal bubbly self, people are like, oh, she doing too much. She's trying too hard to be funny. I'm like, this is just who I am. So I think a lot of times people just think I have so many extremes, but that's just my real personality.

[A]

Yeah. And it's not really reasonable to expect you to be like, ta da.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Why would I be like that when I'm just running my air, like pumping gas? Why would I be acting like that? Right at the same time you're like, you know, like people, they. For whatever reason, because, you know, you exude confidence. And when you're confident about what you have to say, you're confident going against the group or what the majority might think about things. Like you said, people are gonna be mad about that. But don't let you also not care how they feel.

[C]

They're like, then she gonna double down.

[B]

Cause one thing about me, I'mma double down on some shit every time I feel you.

[A]

Because if I said it and I meant it, then why would I walk it back?

[B]

Because I feel like if, you know, if you speak with conviction and you truly believe the things that you saying and you not just pulling it out your ass and just saying it just to say, why would I back down? Like, no, this is really how I feel. I thought about it and I'm saying it because I thought about it.

[C]

Yeah, that's true though. But a lot of people nowadays, I

[A]

say this all the time.

[C]

Are saying things for clickbait. And then when they get Canceled for. They're like, oh, shoot.

[B]

Like, I didn't mean that.

[C]

I didn't mean that. It's like, yeah, that's what you get for just trying to say stuff to get a reaction out of people. Right. You know what I mean?

[B]

Right.

[A]

And I feel like that has gotten so much more popular over the past few years is people just saying shit to each other. Yes. It's like, please don't mistake me for one of them hoes.

[C]

I'm telling you.

[A]

I thought about it before I said that. I promise to God I thought about it. I considered the research. Like, honest. I knew.

[B]

Hello.

[A]

Well, I was saying when I said that. Shit. I did not say say that just to piss y' all off.

[B]

And majority of the time, if they actually go do their own research, especially if it's on something that has backing behind it, they'll realize you. Not really. Just saying some. Just to say a good example, we had an episode last week and we were talking about. Remember we were talking about your car, and Lex car is like a dark blue, and my car is white. And so she was just saying how dirty her car be, and I was like, girl, mine too. I need to go get it washed. But, you know, the good thing about having a white car is that dirt doesn't show up as easy on white cars as it does on dark cars. And she was like, yeah, that's true. And somebody was in the comments, like, drea, you sound crazy. That's ridiculous. I was like, google is free.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Cause you could literally Google it. It's the truth.

[C]

I mean, and when Dust shows up on your car, it's white. So you have a white car, Right?

[B]

And I googled it just so I could say that to him. I was like, google is free. Cause it will pop up when you type it in. But people just love to argue.

[A]

It's like, why would you pick that? Of all the things to argue with me about, like, why would that get you so incensed that you, like, let me type up broadcast.

[C]

He was like, the comments argue with about Anne Frank, but they wanted to laugh. When I give them something to argue about, they just want to crack jokes, Girl, I'm weak.

[A]

When you said Anne Frank was born in the 1600s and Boo was like, no. She was, though. Like, you was over here.

[B]

Like, no, girl.

[A]

And then you was like, no, I'm confusing her with Helen Keller. Like, she wasn't born in the 1600s. I needed to give it up. They said, baby, you talking about Christopher Columbus?

[B]

Yes, bitch. But his daughter yes. Because the three of them was actually all alive at the same point in time. At some point. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, no, baby, that is not it. Bless that, though. But it's all right. And listen, high school was a long time. It was very new.

[C]

I was reminding people, hey, I'm about to be 37 now.

[A]

Like, come on.

[C]

I'm a very smart, educated girl. But I was more so. I was a mathematician. I was a math girl.

[A]

Okay, nice.

[C]

Those were my, you know, areas of expert, man.

[A]

Math and science.

[C]

Okay?

[A]

Don't ask me about history.

[C]

Don't ask me about no history.

[B]

She said, I don't know nothing about history.

[C]

About no verb, noun, pronouns. None of that. I don't know what none of that is, but I can add some.

[A]

Yeah, I mean, I did have to look it up. But I said, I know Helen Keller was not born in no damn 16th century.

[B]

No, she wasn't. Girl. I simply know it was a little later.

[A]

Like, when did you think World War II was right? They.

[C]

But they were saying in our comments that Helen Keller isn't even real, that she was fake, that they made her up. Okay, they did say that.

[B]

They did say that, but they're fucking lying. That lady really existed and she didn't

[A]

die till the 60s.

[C]

Well, then they said that she was lying, that she could see about being blind, about Stevie, too.

[A]

Okay?

[B]

That he's lying about being blind.

[C]

They said, like, when they be walking, when people walk up on stage, he be like this.

[B]

He could probably hear their feet coming.

[C]

I'm just telling you what they said.

[A]

I didn't say this. And that's why you can't listen to everybody. Okay? Niggas just be talking.

[B]

Cause I feel like if Stevie Wonder could really see, he would have got caught by now. Yeah.

[A]

Come on. Be for real. So because y' all have been doing this show for so long, do you ever feel like you have maybe outgrown a version of yourself that you know or some things that you used to say? Cause, like, the Reid has been around 13 years. Yeah, baby. That girl from 2013 and the girl from 2026. Like, not the same bitch.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So do y' all ever feel like. Like maybe that you have grown up in certain ways and the audience don't appreciate it? Cuz I get a lot of feedback of, like, you too serious now. Like, yeah, you went to school and now everything you say is smart? Well, damn, bitch, what you want me to do?

[B]

Excuse me for elevating and working on myself. My bad for growing up, right?

[A]

That is hilarious.

[B]

No, I feel that 100% because, yes, girl, we get those type of comments all the time. Like, they be like, we miss the red and black background. Y' all was so unhinged back then. And y' all were so fun and carefree and y' all just used to have such a good time. Now I feel like the show is more serious then they complain about the guests because we didn't used to have guests. So they'd be like, y' all be having too many guests on. And when the guests come on, it'll be the same as the solo episodes. They just always complaining a lot about how the newer versions of us.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But they also do have to realize, number one, yes, the show started in 2018. Lex and I are not those same versions of ourselves as we are now. Right. And these then, I don't know, like, just so much has changed in our lives. We've changed as women. We also just don't even like to touch on certain topics. We don't date the same way that we used to.

[A]

Oh yeah, that's a big one.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

We don't date the same way that we used to. And we also just like to be a little bit more private about that part of our life. I think that was something that they really enjoyed that we would talk about, but now we don't really talk about it as much. I think they definitely feel away about that. But we also have sponsors now. The show is making a lot more money. We got to be careful sometimes with the things we say. We don't want to offend people, but they don't understand. They don't always understand it. I think we do have some of our audience that understands, well, a good amount of them. They don't be trying to hear that shit.

[C]

But I think it's like you can also understand that whenever I started being online, you know, I was like, what? 28, right. And I did not know anything what I was doing with my life. I used to drink.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

All the time. I used to be on the show. So, like, I mean, I still get tipsy on the show and have a good time. But it's just like again, I'm about to be 37 this year, so I should not be the same 28, 29, 30 year old woman that you watch. But what I do appreciate is we do have a large chunk of our audience who has grown with us. Then we have new listeners coming in that do enjoy us. So the people that used to, like, you know, the ratchet turn up stuff, you know, they maybe have filtered out, but that's also okay.

[A]

Right?

[C]

We're gonna grow and we're gonna lose some on the way, but we're also gonna g on the way. So I can just appreciate the people who appreciate where we are in life right now.

[A]

Yes, I love that. Because you really, like, it's not worth it to not grow up because.

[C]

Right.

[A]

Because people might not like you no more. And you have to always remember that if you never evolved or changed, then people would be listening like, damn, these hoes 37 still talking about the they when they was 29. It's really no winning with some people. And. And so I feel the same way. Like, the people who are like, I've been listening since day one. I'm like, I can't believe you have evolved with us like, this past 13 years. Like, I love that you're still getting something out of the show, but I also understand for some people, it's not the same. It don't hit the same, and they looking for something else, and that's fine. It's a million podcasts out here. You can definitely go find the one that is clicking with what you want.

[B]

Yeah, we always say that too. Like. Like, it's so many other podcasts out there. It's so much content. If this is not working for you no more, have at it.

[A]

Yeah, right. Cause everybody got a show these days, which, you know, I mean, and that's great. The more the merrier, really. But it just means that I'm not trying to be everything to everybody, because

[B]

how could I ever be?

[C]

Right?

[A]

Right. I have to do what feels right to me, first and foremost, and the audience will come from that.

[B]

Right.

[A]

It's not me catering to you. It's me being myself and whoever that's that is for, you know? But I'm not trying to be universally loved.

[C]

I agree. And I think we get, like, comments from a lot of people that'll be like, oh, my gosh, this is what our black women choose to sit. This is all black podcasts talk about. I'm like, first of all. All the podcasts, whatever race, we all be talking about the same shit. First of all, then if this is not. There's so many black women that have so many educational podcasts, podcasts about politics, true crime podcast, but instead of giving them love and going promote that podcast, you want to sit under our comments every week telling us how bad we are and what we don't do. But I'm like, that's so crazy, because my algorithm literally only Shows me things that I enjoy. I don't even engage with things I don't like because I don't want to see it on my timeline. So it's so crazy to me that people are like, how is this on my timeline? Because you're engaging with us, you're liking our pictures. You're doing something where poor mods is popping up on your page, so just leave it alone and go support the people who do talk about the things that you want to hear, you know?

[A]

Right. It's like going to a choreographer and being like, why you not teaching us physics, right, bitch? Cause that's not what I do. I came here to show you how to twerk. Right.

[B]

You know what I'm saying?

[A]

And like you said, black women especially are doing podcasts about so many different topics. Please go talk to the PhDs and go tune in to their show about the smarty arty shit that they do.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And they're good at it. And they are. They are high level production now, see,

[C]

when we started on podcasting, we had

[B]

one camera, one mic, one mic, horrible sound, everything.

[C]

Now these people are starting podcasts with 4K camera.

[B]

They in whole studio. They in whole studio now.

[C]

So it's like they have great content there. So y' all can.

[A]

You can go find that. Even TikTok. It's somebody that is coming up on my algorithm now. A black woman talking about how the black church used to be so much more political and what has happened from, like the 50s to now. And I just. When y' all was talking, it made me think of that because it's like, imagine somebody coming to me and being like. While I'm in the middle of talking about, you know, Blue Ivy's hair or whatever. And you like, why are you not talking about the impact of the black church on the Democratic Party in 1966? And it's like, bitch, that's literally, girl. Let me point out, that's not me.

[B]

I'll send you the link so you can click on it.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

So what would y' all say has been harder, building success publicly or growing up and evolving publicly?

[B]

I feel like it's been equally as difficult. Like, growing up and evolving is difficult because, again, like, we were just talking about, you have all of the critics that don't like the newer version of yourself that you're becoming. But then the success part has been difficult too, because Lex and I have really been navigating this on our own. Like, we definitely, you know, we're signed to 85 and they've helped us a lot when it comes to building the business behind the scenes. But when it comes to poor minds, it's really just Lex and I running the show and running everything. As far as the finances, we had to learn a lot. Like, we had to learn.

[C]

We fund everything.

[B]

Yeah. We had to learn a lot about finances. We fund everything on our own. Now we have a staff of about like, what, 10, 10 to 11. Yes. And, like, we didn't really have anybody to teach us how to navigate that world. And so we had to. It was a lot of trial and error.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I feel like it's the same for me. Like, I've never been, like Draya always said, like, she's always had that, like, entrepreneurial spirit. That's never been me. I always wanted to clock in, give me my paycheck every two weeks and I need it on time. And I never wanted to, like, own a business, if I'm being honest. So making that transition, like, literally my last job I had, they pretty much made me quit. And I was like, I don't wanna quit, though. They're like, babe, you gotta go.

[A]

And I called her.

[C]

I was like, they made me quit. I don't know what to do.

[A]

She was like, girl, okay, let's turn up. Like, this is what we want.

[C]

This is what you wanted. So that transition into being like a boss and, you know, having to sometimes, you know, hey, we can't pay ourselves out this much. Cause we gotta make sure our staff get they money and, you know, budgeting and doing things like that, it's a blessing. But again, we've had to learn everything. Like, just me and her and then growing in front of the camera too. Like, I am a business, so I have to keep that in mind at all times. And I think a lot of times people will try to bring up old things, bring up old clips or things that I used to say, and I'm like, okay, I don't feel that way anymore. Don't you change your mind?

[A]

They don't though.

[C]

Do you not change your mind?

[B]

But I think a lot of people don't. Yeah.

[A]

And they feel like that's being real. But, like, I would feel like an idiot if I. I thought the same things and felt the same way now as I did when I was like 13 years old.

[C]

I'm saying those. You used to eat dino nuggets when you were 10. Do you still eat dino nuggets now? No. You changed your mind? Nah, that's still eating Nasty. But I think that's been A struggle for me because people were like, well, Lex, I thought that you said. I said, well, Lex is figuring life out. Lex changed her mind. And when she was doing it that way, she realized it wasn't working for her. So now. Now Lex feels this way. And so it's like, a lot of times I feel like growing up in front of the camera, they don't give us grace. And it be hard because I'm very sensitive, too. So a lot of things be hurting my feelings, and I be like, dang, do y' all not realize, like, I'm a human? It was this one video on TikTok, and people was talking about, like, oh, I don't like people who try too hard and being funny. And then I'm looking at the comments, and they're like, naming all these comedians. I'm like, ooh, damn. Ooh, damn. Then all of a sudden, they said, lex P, too. And it got like 3000 likes.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

I was like, oh, my go. Not 3,000 people agree. I said, oh, no. But I think with things like that,

[C]

like, I said, I have just learned to. I can't do anything but be me. And I think even before the show, I had tried so long to, like, fit in a box of what I thought society wanted from me. And then when I felt like I was doing that, I didn't feel comfortable. I didn't feel like I was growing. And once I just kind of let go of caring and just was like, this is. I'm gonna unapologetically be myself, then I started to attract those people that were like, you know what? I'm here for y', all, and I love y'. All. And I think that's what's been able for us to, like, even do things outside of poor minds as well. So I feel like growing up in front of the camera, like, maturing and changing is difficult. Yeah, it's very, very hard.

[A]

It's very hard. I definitely had to grow a thick skin once the reed got really popular, because it was like, you just are not ready for. For thousands of people's opinions about you to be. And then now the. I mean, at least when we started, the algorithm wasn't like it is now. Now I could just be on TikTok minding my business, and then here go a video of somebody being like, oh, I don't fuck with Crystal. And it's like.

[B]

And it's like, damn, bitch, what I do.

[A]

Why would you put that on my fucking timeline, bitch? I didn't ask for this. You really do have to develop this sense of, like, people are allowed to have their opinions. These people don't know me. And it's been so important for me to protect my private life and things that are not subject to the Internet or the listeners approval or, you know, it's just certain things I keep private because I'm not gonna share nothing with the world that I'm not ready for people to throw back in my face at this point. I just know that, like, anything I say, somebody who don't like me is gonna try to hurt me with it. Do y' all feel like there's anything where you're like, I'm too vulnerable about these topics. Like, we're gonna keep certain shit private. Like, it's certain things or even within your friendship where it's like, we are. We have to make sure that, like, we are a team first and foremost. Like. Or just, you know, just the way you kind of have to adjust what you say and in. In the best interest of you, like, making sure that you're taking care of yourself. Yourself.

[B]

One of the main things that we used to always talk about on the show, like, we would always give the guys that we were dating at the time nicknames, and we would talk about our dating life on the show. Now we don't do that anymore. We never talk about our relationship. I mean, the most we'll do is tell somebody when we're in a relationship. We're not gonna go in depth and talk about all of the details. And it's the same way with our friendship. Like, if Lex and I are having issues with each other or issues with any of our other friends, we gonna keep that off camera because not only do we want to protect our friendship and our relationship, but also protect the people lives that don't want to be a part of the spotlight because it's difficult. And, like, people are so nosy. Like, it's. And one of the main reasons we stopped talking about guys that we were dating on the show because, girl, we would give them nicknames, and they will find out who they were and be posting it on the Internet. Like, oh, yeah, I know who Lex talking about. I know who Dre is talking about. It's like, how you even find it. Y' all need to go work for the FBI.

[A]

Yes. Yeah, they interesting, girl.

[C]

And I think for me, it was like, again, we've had conversations on the show where I've been honest about, like, how I've been cheated on, how I've cheated on someone in a relationship. And, like, we're having these conversations. I may joke about it X, Y, Z. But then it's like they'll fast forward and be like, well, Lex is a cheater. Why do y' all listen to her? She don't even take. She cheats on every man she's ever been with. I'm like, how did y' all get that out of me? Having a conversation or me maybe joking about something or, like, I'll talk about how, you know, I grew up, like, in an all white school, so I kind of. My confidence came a little later in life, and I was kind of always unsure about myself because I fit in, but I didn't look like everybody else. And I'll have these conversations and they'll be like, this girl don't even like herself. She thinks she's white. And it's like, you know, it's like you have these moments where you're trying to be vulnerable, and they'll literally use it against you. Or they'll think they have some tea. Like, I'm from. I lived in Houston for 10 years. I'm from Orange, Texas. But then we had an episode where I was like, oh, I was born in California, but I was raised in Texas. And somebody was like, that bitch, not even from Texas, y'. All. You can't use tea that I gave you against me.

[B]

Right?

[C]

You didn't even know I was born in California because I told y' all that. So it kind of makes me want to hesitate, sharing things, because no matter what I share, they reverse it to make it something negative. It's very strange.

[A]

Like, somebody is always going to take that in the worst possible way. It's like, how is that even t.

[C]

Like, I was born in California and

[A]

moved to Texas when I was like, one. Literally.

[C]

Literally.

[B]

People are just so strange. And one thing that they do that I really do love, because I feel like it's attributed to the growth of the show over the past two years. Like, people, it's so many clip pages on Tik Tok that are always clipping episodes of the old shows, episodes of the new shows, and I feel like it's helped grow the show because they're always going viral. But then also on the downside, y' all clipping all of this old stuff, and then they're taking things that we said and we don't feel that way. And so then if we talk about a similar topic on the show now, they're like, well, that's not what y' all said three years ago. Well, girl, it was three years ago, Right?

[A]

Because it was three fucking years ago.

[B]

Let it go like I did.

[A]

Can I change my mind? I got new information. I got information. I picked up a book. Lord, I have not posted a nigga in 13 years. I just have not. I refuse.

[B]

Oh yeah, same, same.

[A]

Even still, people will. Oh my God. I'll never forget. Last person I was dating, we went to brunch or something.

[C]

And.

[A]

And you know, going about my life, whatever, blah, blah, blah. I get on Instagram later and somebody done posted a picture to they story of me and my nigga at brunch talking about, okay, Crystal, I see you.

[C]

Oh my God.

[B]

I said, what the hell?

[C]

I would have been horrified.

[B]

People are so strange. People are so strange. Cause why are you taking a picture of me instead of come and say hey, right?

[A]

I mean, you could have just came and said, like, girl, I would've took a selfie with you. But please don't post the person. I don't even post the person I'm dating. Like, why would you do that? So that's why I'm like, I wonder if there's anything that y' all are like, very deliberate about keeping private. Because when your show is as popular as yours is, I know you get so much love and support, but you also get the people who are like constantly looking for something. Yeah. To come at you for.

[B]

Oh, they strange, girl. I'm like that with my mom too though, because she lives in Houston by herself and you know, she be going to the grocery store, she be moving around and stuff. So I always try not to post her on the Internet because I just feel like once I start posting her all the time, people are going to be stopping her trying to take pictures or even sometimes people are just strange. You just never know what somebody would do. Cuz they might be like, oh, that's Joy and Mama. Cuz I had a situation in Atlanta where we were at Target together and you know how like they be. What, what is that content called? Where they'll be recording you and then you don't know they recording you and they'll try to make it look like it's a situation that is not. But it's called something specific.

[C]

I don't know what it's called.

[B]

I can't remember. But it was like this guy recording some content. He was trying to make it seem like like I was giving him my number, like I was interested in him, but that's not what happened. And so my mom was there, so she was in the content as well. And then he posted it on YouTube. And I had to go off on him because it started going viral. And I was like, what the fuck? You need to delete this, right?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. That's the sort of thing where it's like, I understand we're in public. There's no expectation of privacy.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Especially with my nephew. Like, I do not play same. These kids ask for none of this. He don't have no concept of, like, his heathen, ain't he in New York City doing all this? So, like, leave my baby out of it.

[C]

I'm the same way. Cause I have two nephews, and my oldest nephew is, like, really quiet, really shy. And so, like, sometimes, like, when we're out and, like, somebody walks up to us, like, I can tell it makes them kind of nervous. So I'm very protective of them as well. So. I get that.

[A]

For sure. I get it. I get it. So y' all have a tour?

[B]

We do.

[A]

So out tour.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Congratulations. Thank you. How is it going? Talk to me about tour life.

[C]

You know, touring is.

[A]

I love to tour. I love to tour.

[C]

No, you know what? I will say this. I really do. Because it's our moment that we really get to see the people and see who we're affecting and seeing people who actually love us. Like, I know we did spend a lot of time talking about, oh, we hate this, we hate that, we hate. But the tour is when we get to see the people who actually love us. The people in the comments that are taking up for us, giving us grace, really understanding us. So the tour is when I feel like I really get to be on. We call our listeners the poor crew. Like, and I tell you, the poor crew, it don't matter what we got going on. They show up and they show out. Like, we have the best listener base, like, ever. It's so crazy. So I really like touring. Cause I can really, like, see the people, talk to them, touch them, hug them. So I'm excited. Like, it's always good to get on the road and really get out there with the people. For sure.

[A]

Yeah. What about you?

[B]

Yeah. I love touring as well, because I feel like it's a great opportunity to be interactive with people. And it's like a more interactive version of the show. I mean, I know people cool with watching us sit down and talk, but it's nice to actually be able to come on stage, play games, interact, do trivia, you know, and of course, Wednesday surprises and stuff. See, we be giving out shots, too. So I think it's just really fun because it's a live version of what we already do on camera every week.

[C]

We call it a big slumber party. It's like a big slumber party.

[A]

I feel the same way about Twitter. Like, I do have even still some element of performance anxiety, stage fright, that sort of thing. But it is so great to look out at this audience and see all these people who just fuck with you so much. And, like, people have brought us all kinds of. Of little gifts and just, you know, and the stories they tell you about, like, y' all got me through these crazy times in my life. It's that sort of stuff that really helps you be like, okay, this is

[C]

why I'm doing it.

[B]

This is why it keeps you going.

[C]

Cause the Internet is so brutal. We tend to forget, right? So every time we do, like, a live show or even when I go out in public, like, I just got a Twitter lashing, like, a month ago over some silly shit. And it was just like, you know what? I'm off Twitter forever. But I really did. Cause I'm done. Because they're so mean on there, right?

[A]

They are.

[C]

So, like, you know what? Now in my career, I'm gonna focus being on the platforms where people really like me and they enjoy my content, right? So I was like, let me get off of here. Cause this is not beneficial to me at all, right? And then it was so crazy because, like, literally the next week, I had an event that I went to. I'm like, oh, people really like me in real life. So if you spend all day on the Internet, you tend to forget.

[B]

You know what I'm saying? So.

[C]

And obviously, being a content creator, 80% of our job is online when you. We're not touring. So it's like, sometimes you gotta go out and touch some grass. I had to go touch some grass. I was like, girl, you're tripping.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Be for real. People love you.

[A]

You're okay. Right? I feel that same way. And, you know, it is. It's just part of the human condition to focus on the things that are negative. And it's like, it could be 10% negative, 90% positive. And that 10% will bother you.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And so one thing that I've started to do is, like, when I get really sweet messages, DMs, emails or whatever, I'll screenshot them, and I put it in a folder of nice things that people have said. And so when you've been online for a long time, or if, you know, Twitter got an attitude with you, for whatever reason, it's just something to go back to and be like, okay, you know what? Maybe right now, people not fucking with me. But in general, overall, you don't get to have this career that spans years and years when an overwhelming amount of love and support, like, the love is definitely stronger than the hate. But we're only human beings, and we. We have a tendency to. To really focus on the things that aren't as positive. But I know y' all shows be lit. I mean, they do, girl.

[C]

They be lit.

[A]

They sold out tour in this economy. The girls love you, for real.

[C]

They do.

[B]

I just think it's been very highly anticipated because I. It's been so long. And then we were supposed to go on tour, I think, in 2024. It didn't happen. We were supposed to go in 2025. So we've been dropping all of these little nuggets, and I think they just kept thinking, okay, they about to drop tickets. And we didn't. Now that we finally dropped them, they like, that's why they bought them so quick. So I'm really excited because the outpouring of love has been so much. It's been so big, and I'm just grateful. I'm grateful that all of these people are excited and they still with us after all these years. And, like, the tour is going to be even bigger than. Than it's been in the past. So it's a blessing, like you said, because the economy right now is hard for a lot of people, right?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I felt that same way when people. For our anniversary show in Atlanta, which niggas was drunk and they was interacting with us, which, you know, I love it, but it doesn't really translate well for, like, other people to listen to. If you wasn't in the room, then you like, oh, my God, these niggas won't shut up. But it was, like, a fun vibe, you know, in person. But anyway, I just. The fact that with things being as hard as they are right now and Trump and this damn war and all this, it's like you really went in your pocket when times are tight to buy a ticket to see me, like, there's no way. I'm not grateful for that.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

I'm overflowing with appreciation for that. Cause it's been years of doing this, and you still really fuck with me like that. You look out at that audience and you like, I'm just so grateful, like, thank you, Lord, that people really rock with me like this. Yeah.

[C]

Cause, I mean, we see so many podcasts start after us, and then they're already done.

[A]

Oh, I can't even tell you how many.

[B]

We've lost count.

[C]

So. It's beautiful to be doing it this long for sure.

[A]

It really is. What's been your favorite city to play?

[B]

Our favorite city. I always have to shout out Tixis, of course.

[A]

Oh, I'm so my Houston.

[B]

Shout out Houston. The Houston is lit every time. It's nothing like being at home. Home. So Houston for sure. Detroit is always lit as Detroit is a lit city. And we didn't know what to expect the first time that we toured out there. Cuz we had never actually been to Detroit before. But when I tell you that was one of the best shows that we had of our last.

[A]

They came in furs and oh my

[C]

gosh, it was a time shows in

[A]

Detroit, that's exactly how they are.

[B]

Cuz majority of their families came from.

[A]

So. Yes.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

It's the same in Chicago. I feel it's like a. Chicago is obviously bigger, but it's that same vibe of like it's just country niggas going on. Yeah, I feel that same way.

[B]

Chicago is one of our other favorite cities. Chicago shows are always lit as hell.

[C]

LA was lit too.

[B]

La.

[C]

LA be lit.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So I'm just excited to see everybody, but I feel like we don't ever have any like city that's just like boring. Cause Dallas be lit like. Like all the cities be having a new yes.

[A]

Or your audience is lit.

[C]

Yeah, I think that's what it is.

[B]

We bring out the leap beach.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

We used to do like college campus shows and so sometimes those are a little weird because it's like, you know, the school is paying the fee and so anybody can come in and it might just be that like the 15 black students on campus wanted us to be there. So it's only 20 people at this show. We like Awkward. How do I. But in general, you know, like your live shows will reflect the listening audience, you know, just the people who are fortunate enough to be able to make it. So the fact that y' all are able to go, you feel the warmth, you feel the love. That's something you have cultivated in your audience. So I hope you take a moment to really be proud of yourself and to celebrate all your success. Congratulations.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

I'm sure things are only going up from here. Please tell the people where they can find you. Not you can't go to a live show, child.

[C]

Well, some cities, I think we still.

[B]

Yeah, we still have some.

[C]

Some of them tickets left, I think

[B]

in like Fort Lauderdale Yeah, it's some tickets left in LA for sure. Cause we just dropped those.

[C]

Yeah, we dropped LA late.

[B]

Yeah. So la, Fort Lauderdale, Detroit. And that's really.

[A]

So where can they get the tickets and find your show?

[B]

So you can go to www.poor minds.com to get your tickets. They're on sale right now. And then you can follow us on all platforms at Poor Minds, it's P O U R M I n D

[A]

s. Yes, Lex, Andrea. Thank you all so much for being on the show today. Thank you. This has been so much fun. I keep seeing yalls clips and when I asked people months ago, like, whose show should I go on or who should I?

[C]

You got to come to Poor Mine. You gotta come on Poor moms.

[B]

Now you got some on our show when you in Atlanta, But y' all

[A]

came up a lot. They were like, I just feel like you talking to those girls is like a vibe. I want to see it. So I'm just happy with that we were able to make it happen. Thank y' all so much for being here and sharing your time with me. Thank you so much. All right, y', all, that's gonna wrap up this week's episode of Chrystal's Couch. Follow us online at Crystal's Couch. And if you have a question for me, please send me an email. Advicerystlescouch.com we'll see you next week.