Dark History – Ep. 182: "The Cult of Kellogg: Cornflakes, Celibacy, and Colonics??"
Host: Bailey Sarian
Release Date: September 10, 2025
Episode Overview
In this episode, Bailey Sarian dives into the bizarre and unsettling history behind Kellogg’s cereal empire—focusing on the man behind the brand, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg. From his religious upbringing and crusade against masturbation, to running a cult-like health retreat in Michigan and inventing cornflakes (supposedly to curb sexual urges), Bailey uncovers the dark, cultish roots beneath the sweet, crunchy façade of your breakfast cereal. The episode explores themes of sexual repression, pseudoscientific health fads, family drama, and the rivalry that led to the modern Kellogg’s empire.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. The Weird Origins of Kellogg's (03:15–13:00)
- Religious Upbringing: John Harvey Kellogg was born into a strict Sabbatarian Adventist family (the precursors to Seventh Day Adventists) in Michigan.
- End-Times Anxiety: Grew up in Battle Creek, MI, a community convinced the world would end any day.
- Early Health Issues: Suffered from rickets, leading to frail health—likely fueling his later obsession with bodily control.
- Influence of Ellen White: Leader of SDA church, claimed visions—one of which anointed young Kellogg as destined for greatness. She was fanatical about sexual purity and warned of the horrors of masturbation (“imbecility, dwarfed forms, crippled limbs…”).
"She said, for men, masturbation could result in, quote, imbecility, dwarfed forms, crippled limbs, misshapen heads, and deformity of every description." (12:01)
2. Path to Cultish Wellness (13:15–25:30)
- Health Reform Craze: Adventist “wellness” movement (no meat, no booze, no caffeine, basically no fun).
- The Western Health Reform Institute: Ellen White's vision led to opening a religious health spa in Battle Creek.
- Kellogg's Ascent: Earns a medical degree, returns to run the spa, renames it the Battle Creek Sanitarium (“the San”), invents the word ‘sanitarium’ to distance it from sanatoriums for the sick.
3. Sexual Repression at the Sanitarium (25:35–37:10)
- Extreme Anti-Sex Agenda: Sanitarium was Kellogg’s lab to cure people of sexual urges.
- Draconian “Cures”:
- Circumcision without anesthesia for boys (“the pain would have a salutary effect on the mind”)
- Sewing foreskin with silver wire for men
- Burning clitoris with acid for women (“for stopping ‘abnormal excitement’”)
- Kellogg's Theories: Believed sex (especially masturbation) depleted life energy; bland food would suppress sexuality.
- Authored the book Plain Facts About Sexual Life—staunchly anti-sex (“it’s giving small wiener energy, in my opinion”—Bailey, 33:03).
"He took it very seriously. Okay, no masturbation. No Touchy." (11:56)
"He claimed it was excellent for stopping, quote, abnormal excitement. Oh, God. Why?" (30:29)
4. The Celibate Couple and the Bland Diet (37:10–42:40)
- Marriage to Ella Eaton: Intelligent, accomplished, and head chef at the San. Their honeymoon? Re-reading Kellogg’s anti-sex book.
- Ella’s Role: Enforced the flavorless, vegetarian, anti-horny diet in her kitchen.
- Recipe Inventions: Ella wrote cookbooks featuring “meatless mayonnaise.” Bailey’s anecdote about a mayonnaise-eating teacher—gross, unsettling, and contextually hilarious (41:50).
"Apparently, they spent their honeymoon rereading his book together...Plain Facts About Sexual Life. They read it. Fun." (39:18)
5. How the Sanitarium Worked: Celebrities, Fads, and Obsessions (42:45–54:05)
- Celebrity Clientele: Presidents, Henry Ford, Amelia Earhart (“Amelia even took Kellogg up in her airplane for his very first flight”—44:46).
- Medicalized Luxury: Guests received intense and invasive wellness evaluations (poop tested, psychological screening).
- Obsessive Treatments: Hydrotherapy (cold baths, human burrito wraps in wet blankets) to fight “horniness,” obsessed with enemas, especially yogurt enemas (“You should do it. It’s great. I tried one not long ago and I felt brand new after”—47:44).
- Zoo Inspiration: Kellogg admired gorillas for pooping five times a day; wanted humans to do the same, leading to digestive obsessions.
"He was so anti sex, but he was obsessed with putting stuff up his butt, you know? ...A huge part of his hydrotherapy treatments were enemas." (47:30)
"He loved a gorilla. One day, he noticed...the gorillas pooped, like, five times a day. So...he thought to himself, like, you know, that right there, that is holiness." (48:37)
6. Family Feud and the Birth of Cereal (54:15–1:13:15)
- Sibling Drama: Will Kellogg, the shunned younger brother, worked business operations, constantly belittled by John and Ella.
- The Accidental Invention: Will lets dough sit; mold leads to flakiness—thus “granola” (later Corn Flakes).
- Credit and Betrayal: Patent war—John leaves Will off the patent; Ella sides with John; Will is furious.
- Will’s Innovations: Adds sugar and salt (for taste and shelf life), igniting mass-market appeal—cornflakes are born.
- Explosive Growth: Will’s company outpaces John, leading to a legal war.
- Supreme Court Decision (1920): Will wins rights to the Kellogg name for cereal, John pays for legal fees—brothers never reconcile.
"John would, like, make Will take meetings with him while he was on the toilet, you know, like, he'd be taking one of his four poops of the day..." (1:00:38)
"So Will had, quote, no excuse for pestering me further." (1:12:52)
7. Kellogg’s Legacy and Cereal’s Strange Roots (1:13:20–1:16:50)
- Changing America’s Breakfast: Cereal becomes the cheap, convenient breakfast—perfect as the Great Depression hits.
- Irony: John’s crusade against pleasure links his name to sugary treats.
- Related History: Parallels with the origin of Graham crackers—bland foods as tools for sexual control, yielding beloved snacks.
"It's kind of crazy if you think about it. Without all this, we wouldn't have...Corn Flakes, Froot Loops, Apple Jacks, Rice Krispies, or Frosted Mini Wheats. We wouldn't have any of this if one guy hadn't hated sex so much that he tried to build a cult against it. Very odd, huh, when you think of it like that?" (1:15:17)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Ellen White’s Anti-Masturbation Stance:
“…masturbation could result in, quote, imbecility, dwarfed forms, crippled limbs, misshapen heads, and deformity of every description.” (12:05) -
On the Sanitarium’s True Purpose:
"Meanwhile, Dr. Kellogg had a very clear mission. Get rid of sex. Yeah. Once and for all and by any means necessary, including surgery." (27:52) -
On Yogurt Enemas:
"Dr. Kellogg didn't just suggest eating yogurt. No, no, no, no, no. Ideally you would eat it, but also you would get yourself a yogurt enema. Creamy and thick, right up the butt and then just oozes out. Sounds like a cream pie. Isn't that called a cream pie? Yum." (50:20) -
On the Sibling Rivalry:
"I guess John finally agreed to sell the business to will for $170,000, which in today's money would be millions." (1:08:25) "From that point on, Will and John, they, like, barely ever spoke again. On September 8, 1941, John, who was, like, 81 at this point, I guess he, like, sat down and he wrote a heartfelt letter...But unfortunately, this letter was never sent..." (1:13:00)
Timeline of Major Segments
- 00:30–03:00 – Bailey’s Apple Jacks craving leads to Kellogg origin deep-dive
- 03:15–13:00 – Kellogg’s childhood, religion, and indoctrination
- 13:15–25:30 – Adventist health reform, spa founding, and Kellogg’s education
- 25:35–37:10 – Sexual purity obsession and “treatments”
- 37:10–42:40 – Marriage to Ella, anti-sex partnership, food rules
- 42:45–54:05 – Sanitarium’s success, celebrity guests, hydrotherapy and enemas
- 54:15–1:13:15 – Birth of cereal, Will’s innovations, legal battle
- 1:13:20–1:16:50 – Cereal's legacy, ironic aftermath, Graham cracker connection
Episode Tone and Style
Bailey’s narration is hilarious, irreverent, and sarcastic—with frequent asides, tangents, and pop culture references (“White Lotus,” “Animal Crossing,” the mayonnaise anecdote). She is frank about the disturbing details, but lightens the mood with self-aware humor and blunt commentary. She often interjects her own opinions and skepticism, keeping the conversation both informative and highly entertaining.
Final Thoughts
Bailey closes by noting the weird paradox that two of America’s classic treats—graham crackers and cereal—were both invented by zealots desperate to suppress sexual urges through bland food. She invites listener reactions and suggestions for future episodes.
Bailey’s final quip:
“Eat a bowl of cereal and think about masturbation or something. I don't know. I'll be talking to you guys later. Goodbye.” (1:19:09)
