Dirtbag Punk with Kerri Kenney-Silver

Summary

Dear Chelsea: "Dirtbag Punk with Kerri Kenney-Silver"

Podcast: Dear Chelsea – iHeartPodcasts
Host: Chelsea Handler
Co-host: Catherine Law
Guest: Kerri Kenney-Silver
Release Date: May 28, 2026
Episode Theme:
A candid, funny, and heartfelt conversation about friendship, creative careers, evolving emotional toolboxes, and navigating the messiness of life and relationships—with advice for listeners, punk rock anecdotes, and memorable laughs.

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Episode Overview

This episode features actress-comedian Kerri Kenney-Silver (Reno 911!, The State, Four Seasons), who joins Chelsea Handler and Catherine Law for a discussion blending humor, advice, and real talk about adulting, friendship, change, and life’s unexpected messes. Listener questions spark serious and hilarious insights about marriage, family dynamics, open relationships, and personal growth, all delivered with Chelsea’s signature candor.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catching Up & Rescue Dog Tales (03:26–06:59)

• Chelsea and Catherine banter about Chelsea’s new rescue dog, Ray J, and the antics of her existing dog, Doug—playfully anthropomorphizing their dogs’ personalities and social lives.
• BottleRock and Santa Barbara recaps: Chelsea jokes about being the festival's known "treat provider," distributing party favors at a wedding, and reflects on shifting recreational drug trends (shrooms are “passe" now, per Chelsea).
• Katherine references Michael Pollan’s book on hallucinogens as brain reset tools, with Chelsea sharing her preferences for being "in her body" when using substances and discomfort with disassociatives.

2. Inviting Listener Questions (07:00–07:57)

• Chelsea encourages “am I the asshole”-type questions from listeners about relationships, family, and workplace drama:

  “Are you the problem?” – Chelsea Handler (07:27)

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3. Reuniting With Kerri Kenney-Silver & Comedy Memories (08:00–13:44)

• Chelsea and Kerri reminisce about their first meeting on Reno 911!, the show’s longevity, and the "circle of life” of TV revivals.

  “It’s a show that never ends because Niecy Nash keeps bringing it back, and I love it.” – Kerri (09:12)

• Discussion on the value of comedic synergy and support in shows like Chelsea Lately:

  “It was the first time I was ever on a show where I was myself...you would save that joke. So I always felt so supported.” – Kerri (10:58)

• Chelsea celebrates Kerri’s “gentle” husband and the rarity of “good men”:

  “He’s one of the most gentle men I’ve ever met...he takes you in. Not disgusting, no gross ulterior motive.” – Chelsea (12:31)

• Humorous riffing about the Epstein files and awkward Google search appearances for "Reno 911."

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4. The Career ‘Pinball’ & Saying Yes (14:57–20:59)

• Kerri opens up about feeling like a “pinball” early in her career, grabbing opportunities as they came, and how that evolved into more confident decision-making:

  “Now...I am able to more clearly and confidently say yes, and then walk into those spaces with more peace.” – Kerri (20:01)

• They compare career trajectories—how outward appearances of strategy often mask behind-the-scenes chaos and improvisation.
• Fun sidebar about Kerri's band “Cake Like Browny,” random gigs, and improbable music biz breaks.

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5. Aging, Change, and Emotional Toolboxes (25:51–38:25)

• Discussion about how age and life force new coping tools—especially when old patterns stop working:

  “Things work for you until they don’t. And I would always be like, what the fuck does that mean?...Until I understood what that meant exactly.” – Chelsea Handler (31:10)

• Kerri explains her journey into meditation, journaling, morning rituals, and “thanking” as forms of finding center:

  “I thank something first...then I will journal. I do my daily meditation. I have to do one to two a day.” – Kerri (34:57)

• Both share how they initially hid their new age routines for fear of being seen as uncool or “not punk rock”—but now embrace vulnerability and emotional growth.

  “You can make [an emotional toolbox] punk rock...Because it fucking works.” – Chelsea (37:15)

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6. Listener Questions & Advice (44:42–74:36)

A. Baby Nickname Cringe (44:42–46:00)

• Question: Must a listener use a niece’s awkward nickname ("Whoa-me") chosen by parents?
• Advice: It’s fine to use the child’s given name; parents can do whatever they want with nicknames, but you aren’t obligated to join in.

  “You can do whatever you want. You don’t have to adopt a nickname because someone else does.” – Chelsea (45:11)

B. Should I Expose a Possibly Cheating Husband? (46:04–53:23)

• Situation: A listener suspects her pregnant friend’s husband is cheating (his travel stories don’t add up).
• Advice: Don’t investigate or confront while friend is about to deliver; prioritize supporting her, and make sure not to blow up her life at her most vulnerable.

  “Bringing this information to her at this time would probably, if anything, do more damage to your relationship with her...” – Chelsea Handler (47:19)

• Possible confrontation with husband discussed, but both hosts and Kerri caution against it; focus on being the best friend she can have in this crucial moment.

C. Blended Family, Grief, and Boundaries—The Cottage Dilemma (57:32–64:34)

• Situation: Listener's partner’s father starts a relationship after the death of his wife, but the family is hurt that the new partner is brought to a sentimental family cottage against the mother’s explicit wishes.
• Advice: The podcast team empathizes with the family’s pain; highlights the importance of honoring clear wishes left by the deceased, while navigating the complexity of moving forward. Chelsea’s advice: support your partner and his sister, “side with the women” in family negotiations.

  “It is valid that they are upset...there’s not a lot of gray area here, so it feels disrespectful to our mother.” – Chelsea (61:41)
  “Always side with the sister. You don’t want her on your bad side.” – Chelsea (63:58)

• Kerri’s humorous solution: stage a haunting at the cottage to scare off the new partner (63:12).

D. Dating a Married Man in an “Open” Marriage (68:04–74:36)

• Situation: A single mom falls for a man in an “open” marriage, but the emotional and logistical messiness is too much.
• Advice: Both hosts say, “Run!” Emphasize focusing on her teenage kids, the mess of the situation, and the need for healthier models for her children:

  “Stop. Run as fast as you can away from this situation...You have four minutes with these babies, and then they’re out in the world.” – Kerri (69:49) “If one of your kids came to you with this dynamic...what would you tell them?” – Chelsea (73:42)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “We were never qualified to be cops in the first place, so age shouldn’t matter.” – Kerri Kenney-Silver (10:01)
• “There are a couple of shows being redone that you’re like, this is not necessary...But that show doesn’t matter how old anybody is. It’s so ridiculous.” – Chelsea Handler (09:35)
• “Rejection is God’s protection.” – (Niecy Nash, quoted by Kerri, 25:51)
• “My New York friends are not as into all the shit that I am in. You definitely get to an age...where all the devices that had been working for you just don’t seem to work anymore.” – Chelsea (30:19)
• “I have this little toolbox now. Gross, even that I’m saying toolbox is gross.” – Kerri (33:35)
• “It is punk rock to be cool about your emotional toolbox...Because it fucking works.” – Chelsea (37:09)
• “If you want advice from Chelsea, write in to dearchelseapodcastmail.com” – Katherine Law (44:41)

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Important Episode Segments (Timestamps)

| Segment | Start | |-----------------------------------------------|--------------| | Rescue dog stories & BottleRock recap | 03:26 | | Listener question invitations | 07:00 | | Reunion & Reno 911! anecdotes | 08:00 | | Creative careers/pinning balls/youthful “yes” | 14:57 | | Grief, aging, and emotional growth | 25:51 | | Kerri’s “toolbox” & self-care rituals | 33:35 | | Listener advice: awkward baby nickname | 44:42 | | Listener advice: cheating suspicion | 46:04 | | Listener advice: grief and family boundaries | 57:32 | | Listener advice: dating a married man | 68:04 |

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Tone & Style

The episode is lively, irreverent, and honest with a strong through-line of solidarity between women, hard-earned wisdom, and a willingness to make the unglamorous parts of growth and coping hilarious and accessible. Chelsea’s sarcasm, Catherine’s deadpan, and Kerri’s comic storytelling keep the pace fast and the mood welcoming, even with emotionally heavy topics.

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Final Thoughts

A blend of punk rock nostalgia, deft career advice, emotional vulnerability, and unfiltered life wisdom make this one of Dear Chelsea’s most engaging episodes. Listeners leave with plenty of laughs, surprisingly practical life advice, and a better understanding that change, growth, and connection are messy—and worth embracing.

Transcript

[Chelsea Handler]

This is an I Heart podcast. Guaranteed human. Let's take a quick break with one of our favorite sponsors, Vital Proteins. Vital Proteins just launched their new collagen sparkling waters in three crisp, refreshing flavors. Strawberry Blossom, Lemon, Lime and Blood Orange. Each can includes collagen peptides that improve skin health in as little as 30 days when sipped daily. With 0 grams added sugar, no artificial sweeteners, and a full daily dose of vitamin C. It's an easy, enjoyable way to support your wellness goals. Get 20% off your next order at vitalproteins.com with promo code Chelsea20 at checkout.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Chelsea Handler]

Sequences shortened and simulated. It's the new year, which means everyone's talking about doing better, eating better, feeling better, taking care of themselves. And if you're thinking that way about your own health, your dog probably deserves that same energy. Doug eats just fresh from just food for dogs. It's real human grade food, not processed junk. And it's the number one vet recommended fresh dog food. And yes, I've seen the difference. More energy, shinier coat, and a dog who suddenly cares very deeply about dinner. Because let's be honest, you wouldn't eat the same processed thing every day. So why are we feeding that to our dogs? No judgment, just logic. What makes this work is that it's shelf stable. I don't need freezer space, I don't need to plan ahead, and I definitely don't need a lifestyle overhaul. If you're starting the year trying to do better, start with your dog. Go to justfoodfordogs.com and get 50% off your first order. No code needed, just a smarter way to start the year right. There was a time that every time I thought about getting therapy, I talked myself out of it. There's always the question of finding the right therapist, whether or not they take your insurance and of course the trauma dump, updating them about your entire life story. That's why Rula actually makes this feel doable. Rula works with your insurance company offering personalized cost estimates upfront with no hidden fees, so you can sign up and find a great therapist in as little as five minutes. So head to rula.com. that's r u l a.com to find a therapist the easy way. Okay, guys, here are my dates for the High and Mighty Tour. 30 May, I will be in Vegas at my residency. In June, I will be in Saratoga Springs, New York, Port Chester, New York. I'm coming to Boston at the Wang Theater. I'll be in Portland, Oregon, Seattle, and then Hyannis, Massachusetts, and then two shows in Nantucket. In August, you can find me in Red Bank, New Jersey, Montclair, New Jersey, and Calgary. That's Canada. In September, I will be in Santa Barbara, San Diego, New York City, Philly, and New Haven, Connecticut. October is Atlanta, Baltimore, Saginaw, Michigan, Pittsburgh, Toronto, Boise, Idaho and Spokane. And then in November, I'll be in San Francisco. I'm coming to Salt Lake City, Austin, Houston, Dallas, Babies, I'll be there. And then in December, I am closing out my tour in Denver and Vancouver. So get your [e-mail] for the high and Mighty Tour. Hi, Katherine.

[Katherine Law]

Hi, Chelsea.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi.

[Katherine Law]

Do you have a new white man in your life?

[Chelsea Handler]

He's not white.

[Katherine Law]

Oh, he's not? Is he lighter?

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, he's light. Okay. But we rescued another dog. His name is Ray J. Did he come with that? No, no, I named him Ray J. We're sitting here waiting for him to arrive. We have adopted him. So excited. He's a chow. And Doug needs a sibling, so I've been looking for a couple of months for a sibling for Doug. And then we were gonna get this other dog, but he wasn't a full chow. And I really like chows, but they're hard to find in rescues. And then Ray J just popped up, and so they got him. This weekend I was away, I went to Bottle Rock, and then I went to my friend's wedding. So I was in Santa Barbara with Cowboy all weekend, and we had a fun. Ray, you narc.

[Katherine Law]

Great.

[Chelsea Handler]

And so now I'm just waiting for him to arrive.

[Katherine Law]

Oh, I love that.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm so happy for you. I know. So hopefully Doug will be able to handle himself, because Doug is dominant. Yeah.

[Katherine Law]

Have they, like, played together already like you did?

[Chelsea Handler]

No, no, no. They're meeting for the first time today outside, so it could go horribly wrong. And then next week, I could say, there is no more Ray J. You know, we had to give him to another family. I mean, but hopefully not. I think Doug will be so excited to have a friend. I think it's just that Ray J, we'll have to see what Ray J's Reaction to being personally invaded by Doug is because we had cowboy's dog with us all weekend. Cowboy has a dog named Benny, and Doug is an assaulter. Doug wants to assault, like humping everything. Everything sexual and everything else. And then eventually that all shakes out. And they love to have fun together. Yeah. So hopefully. But Doug is definitely dominant and this is his house.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah. Well, he's got all his, like, dog friends up in Whistler, so hopefully this will just be more.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I mean, he really wants a lot of action, and I just cannot provide that action.

[Katherine Law]

See, we tried to buy extra dogs to, like, play with Mimsy and, like, keep her. Now they all just stare at us and want us to play with them individually. They do play together, but it's like we have to be involved. They're very people oriented, so hopefully. Hopefully they can play together.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So your weekend was good? It was three day weekends.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Bottle rock festival. I've never been up to that music festival. That was amazing. I saw Lorde perform. She was out of this world. I saw Teddi swims perform. LCD sound system. Yeah. And they were all great. We all. We just had a blast. It was so. And then we went to Santa Barbara on Saturday and we went to a wedding that was really fun. I handed out treats to a lot of different people. Everyone came over to me and they were like, I hear you have the stuff. And I was like, okay. I'm like, who told you? They're like, we just heard in general that you have the stuff. So the message is spreading.

[Katherine Law]

I love it. It's not like. Not even like a dry wedding versus, like a wedding with alcohol. It's like a wedding with alcohol plus party favorites.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, now everyone's doing shrooms and I'm like, I'm already over shrooms. Like, I already passed that. That's like the passe to me now. So I'm onto the stuff.

[Katherine Law]

What do you think about, like, Michael Pollan talks in that book about, like, doing a brain reset with hallucinogens and that sort of thing. What do you think about that? I feel like I'm 41. I kind of feel like it's time for a brain reset.

[Chelsea Handler]

You mean to do the drugs and to have a journey? Yeah, for sure. I think that's good. I've never done that, like guided kind of. Well, I did with ayahuasca, but. But I've never done like a guided, you know, mushroom sit or guided MDMA sit. You could do it with anything. Ketamine is pretty Popular now, but that's not really my drug. I'm not disassociative. I don't like that. I don't like feeling. I like to be. I like to be in my body when I'm high.

[Katherine Law]

I feel like I need something to help me deal with anxiety. But also I have anxiety about using any kind of exciting drug.

[Chelsea Handler]

There's a lot of anxiety going around these days.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Chelsea Handler]

And yes, we need you to write in your questions, people, if you have any questions about relationships, about job dynamics, about interpersonal affairs, any sort of family drama that you're going through, if you want to call in with a family member or somebody that you're dating or you're in a relationship with or a friend or a coworker, anything like that. We welcome couples.

[Katherine Law]

You know what we also like is sort of like, am I the asshole type?

[Chelsea Handler]

Question.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Are you the problem?

[Katherine Law]

Yes. Yeah. Like, if you've had a confrontation with somebody and you need, like, Chelsea to rule in favor or, you know, not in your favor, then write in, yes,

[Chelsea Handler]

we're ready for you. We're ready, willing, and able.

[Katherine Law]

And write into dearchelseapodcastmail.com.

[Chelsea Handler]

yeah. Oh, and I have to promote my show in Saratoga Springs, New York. I'm coming to Saratoga Springs, New York, next weekend, everybody. June 3rd, Saratoga Springs just added.

[Katherine Law]

Excellent.

[Chelsea Handler]

Get your tickets@chelsea handler.com.

[Katherine Law]

well, let's get into our exciting guest today.

[Chelsea Handler]

So you know our guest today from Reno911, and she is returning in the second season of Netflix, the four Seasons. Please welcome Carrie Kenny Silver. Oh, my God. Carrie. Kenny Silver is here today. I mean, we are. Ray, you narse. We're trying to figure out how long it's been since we saw each other last.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, I don't like it.

[Chelsea Handler]

But it's been probably. I don't think it's been 10 years.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, it can't.

[Chelsea Handler]

It can't have been.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, no, no.

[Chelsea Handler]

But we did meet 23 years ago when I did a guest episode of Reno 911.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

The very first episode of Reno 911.

[Katherine Law]

Was it.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, you were on the first episode of Reno911. There was a pilot, but then the first official episode, you were on.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, are you sure?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Well, 2003. So 2003 was the first year that the show aired.

[Chelsea Handler]

I think I.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Let's just say first season. Let's say first season.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Because I knew of the show before I was on it, so. Okay. So it had to have been after.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Okay, first season.

[Chelsea Handler]

Even though I like that Honor and accolade. That was the first. Was it the first time I urinated on a set from laughing? No. Girls Behaving Badly. I was like, where did you urinated? Like, from laughing too hard while we were filming.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Because I was gonna say we could check Wikipedia.

[Chelsea Handler]

It was just so ridiculous. That show was so ridiculous. And I know people probably bother you all the time about redoing it. And. Didn't you guys redo it? We did, yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It's a show that never ends because Niecy Nash keeps bringing it back, and I love it. And we actually just did an interview together the other day, and she said, never say never. She's the one who instigates every time we come back. But we just had. We just did a movie two years ago.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

We did two more seasons the year before that. So. Yeah. It just keeps, you know, at a certain point.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I disagree. Talking about reruns or, like, recreating shows. There's a couple of people that are. There are a couple of shows that are being redone that you're like, this is not necessary. But, I mean, a lot of them, you know, let's be honest. A lot of them, you're like, this is. Nobody has another idea like, you're gonna resurrect a show from however many years ago. And some of them are worthwhile, but that show doesn't matter who how old anybody is. It's so ridiculous. You knew where I was gonna go with that. It doesn't matter.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

You're right, actually, because we were never qualified to be cops in the first place, so age shouldn't matter.

[Chelsea Handler]

I remember we.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Somewhere.

[Chelsea Handler]

Maybe it was. Was it Reno? No.

[BetterHelp Ad Voice]

No.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Somewhere. No, no. Because we have only been there one time. The whole group. We've only been there one time. We. We would send a B camera there to do, you know, shots of the city and stuff to add to the show. But as a group, we hadn't been there since we were promoting the movie Reno 911 Miami, which was years into the show itself.

[Chelsea Handler]

I love Reno 911 Miami.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's like CSI Whistler, Miami, San Diego. So ridiculous. And so then. So that's how we first met. And then you. You would come on Chelsea lately all the time on the panel, which was such a nice delight because we were friends and we saw each other a lot more frequently in those days, and you were able to, like. And it was fun to always have my friends on Chelsea lately because, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Even though you're not a traditional standup comic. You're a comic.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, but I miss that show because that was the first time I was ever on a show where I was myself. I was terrified. But you were so supportive, and you're so fast that I always felt like if that glazed look came in my eye, like, I don't know, you would just jump in, you'd reach down and grabbed that toddler out of the pool, and you would save that joke. So I always felt so supported. But also, you were just. You are such a laugher, and you are such a fan of other people, and you love showcasing other people, so it's such a great place to sort of try. And then if you felt like you were flailing, you would. You would pull us out.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, well, that's a very nice part. Thank you, Carrie. That's so sweet. Yeah, it was nice when you have four people on a panel, because you can kind of bounce off the walls, and it doesn't behoove anybody for anybody to not do well. You know what I mean? Exactly. Everybody. Everyone is trying to make everybody. It's kind of like keeping the plates up. You're like, okay, if that. If we have a bad panel, if one person doesn't look good, we all don't look good. So you want to help and support each other. Yeah. And Carrie has a wonderful husband and a wonderful son. A husband. I just have to say one thing about your husband. Okay. Especially now that we know that most men are garbage. You are so blessed.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I know.

[Chelsea Handler]

And he is blessed, of course, to be with you, because you're a blessing. But. And I. Don't you throw up the word blessing. No, you don't. Okay.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

For this show, hashtag blessing is on every one of your igs.

[Chelsea Handler]

But Steve is one. He's a cinematographer.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Correct.

[Chelsea Handler]

DP Cinematographer. And he is one of the most gentle men I've ever met. Like, just gentle. Like, sees everybody, sits down with everybody, listens to everybody. Because he's very perspicacious. Cause that's what he does for a living, is watching people. But he takes you in. And he's one of those guys that is not disgusting, has no gross ulterior motive. And I know all men are not bad. You know, I know that. I know there are good men around. I get it. There's lots of them. And most of my friends are married to good men. But when you hear all this news and you constantly hear these stories, you're just like, oh, my God, who is it? Like, it would be quicker to name all the people who weren't on Epstein Island. I know. Than to try to figure out how many people were.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah, don't think I didn't look everybody up. By the way, Reno911 is in there. Tom Lennon and I were laughing our ass. I was on FaceTime with him and I said, oh, my God, we're in the Epstein files. He's like, please don'. I said, no, no, no, no, no.

[Chelsea Handler]

This is a perfect reason to bring the show back, to solve the Epstein file.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It's an email that was going from somebody to somebody about Universal and what was coming out that week. And it was Reno911 Miami. And I was like, okay.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, oh, oh, that's funny.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

But anyway, I know. And thank you for saying that about my husband Steve. I love celebrating him. Cause he is like, in the. You know, he's a dp, so he's. He's. He's the kind of the watcher. He's the quieter. He's the.

[Chelsea Handler]

He's everything.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And he's the grounder to me and my, you know, Tasmanian devil friends. But he shot Big Bang Theory, Two and a Half Men, Mom. He's now shooting Leanne, and she's an angel. And I'm so glad he's working with such.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, she's awesome.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Sweetheart. And just a genuine talent and so happy to be there, which is like such a great thing at this moment. Is in his career, too, to be with someone like that. Yeah. But I'm just so lucky. And we have such an amazing kid. And I. I can't believe how much of my life has. Has lined up. I can't believe it. Because it shouldn't have. I mean, I. I look at, like, you know, just the. The scattered ideas and. And things I was reaching for when I was younger. Just anything. And then the fact that it's lined up in this beautiful way. I sometimes can't believe it's my life. And. Wow, I love that you see that he's always adored you. Always adored you.

[Chelsea Handler]

That is beautiful. What did you think was like, where. Like. Tell me about that. Talk about that when you're thinking about having scattered. Because I felt like that, like, I felt like a pinball when I was like, you know, in my early 20s. I was out here, but I didn't know where I was going. And I just was kind of like, you know, like, frenetic.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah. It's funny, though, you say that, but it doesn't come across like that.

[Chelsea Handler]

We're talking about you, Carrie.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Don't Even from the outside for Example, your career looks very. I don't want to say planned, but it looks like it made.

[Chelsea Handler]

Strategized.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, like everything made the next logical sense, and there was a progression. Is a progression. And it doesn't look chaotic in the same way that probably mine doesn't look chaotic, although on the inside, you know, because I graduated college and had my own television show at graduation. The state. I mean, who. Who has that? There's nothing chaotic about that.

[Chelsea Handler]

And you also, in your band and.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And my band. We. We who.

[Chelsea Handler]

Which online is demanding.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Are we getting that? Not only are we here, but the head is leaning.

[Chelsea Handler]

It looks like a cat from this angle. But anybody who watches this podcast or listens to this podcast knows that I would never have a cat in my house.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, my God.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, if somebody came with a cat, obviously I wouldn't kick them out, but I don't have cats.

[Katherine Law]

For those listening at home. My dog Mimsy is snuggling Carrie's foot.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

He's resting his head on my foot.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, my God, he is.

[Katherine Law]

Oh, trying to take off.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

She.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah, that's okay. You know, she's.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's okay. Her vagina's not out. So Carrie couldn't see it.

[Katherine Law]

Not at the moment.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I misgendered her, and now she's mad. You're a beautiful girl.

[Chelsea Handler]

You're banned.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yes. So that, like, there's an example of some. I did what I think you probably did, and I continue to do. Which is the next indicated step, right? So somebody says, hey, here's this thing or this idea. And I go, yeah. And they go, don't you want to read it first? And I go, no, I'll do it. And then it either produces something, which the state has obviously, and continues to 38, 37 years later. The band was literally. Our boyfriends were in bands, and they were all on tour and had extra instruments laying around.

[Chelsea Handler]

The band is cake.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Like, it's an impossible name to remember. And then everyone says, oh, it's. Oh, it's like the band cake. We were. No, it was cake like your pancake, I would imagine. A couple of us worked at a bakery, and there were on the box of brownies, it says for moist or cake like brownies. So we picked cake like brownies.

[Chelsea Handler]

Why not moist? Everyone loves that word.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Well, now, today, maybe that's the reboot, I think, like, for example, with the band, it was just like, oh, there's instruments laying around here. Let's play them.

[Katherine Law]

And.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And. And some guy poked his head into our. The Practice space. And said, hey, we've got a show this weekend in Brooklyn. Do you guys want to play it? And we're like, oh, no, no, we're not a band. And he's like, well, you sound like a band. And we were like, oh, well, I mean, we have three songs. We don't really. And he's like, well, come play your three songs. And we came and played our three songs. And John Zorn was at that show and said, I want to make a record with you. And we were like, well, we don't. We only have three songs. He's like, well, you better quickly write some more. So we did and put it out with Avant. This Japanese label got three and a half stars in Rolling Stone. Our first album.

[Chelsea Handler]

Holy shit.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And then Ric Ocasek found us, said, I want to make a single with you. He said, can I bring some friends to your show? And his friends were Neil Young and a bunch of other people. And Neil said, I want to sign you as my second band to this new Warner Brothers label I'm doing. So we. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and yes and yes and yes and yes. And we just kept going, that's amazing. And same with, you know, the State ends. And Tom and Michael Black and Ben were like, we want to do, you know, the Viva Variety. We want to do Viva Variety, which was a sketch we had done on the State as a show. Yes, okay. Yes. And we did that for years. And then, you know, like, that led into Reno, which leads into. And so I think the difference is this is the longest winded answer of all time.

[Chelsea Handler]

I love it.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

But I think that the differences between now and then is that back then, I felt like these things were swirling around me and I was just grabbing at them. Someone would reach in and say, do you want to do this? And I'd go, yes, yes, yes, yes. Now, because I have to be a more grounded person, just by nature of age and health and the world, I still see those opportunities. They're still happening, thank God. But I feel like I am able to more clearly and confidently say yes, and then walk into those spaces with more peace. I felt like I was tumbling into those other spaces going, what are we going to do? What do you need for me?

[Chelsea Handler]

Right, right.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And now I feel like I can own them more, in a sense.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. That's very interesting. All while having the same exact haircut. For all this time, she's had the same exact haircut.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

That's true. And I really hope you're gonna put a flash of all the haircuts.

[Chelsea Handler]

When did you have a different haircut?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

When? Sugar beans, have you not seen. I posted one of those. Look at my. What. What was mom like in the 90s thing.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, okay.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And all it is is a parade of haircuts and colors.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like. Like short layers.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, honey.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah, pick a color.

[Chelsea Handler]

Short layers on short hair.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, no, no, no.

[Katherine Law]

Let's see what's going on coming up here.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, this was before I met you, but I. Like, one of the things I admire about you is that you've had the same haircut since I've known you. And I.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

And I find that to be pretty inspiring. Like, you found something you liked. I. Because I just cut my hair, like, a couple days ago. I was like, I can't do this anymore. And they're like, oh, what? And they're like, there's nothing that's going to be that big of a change. I'm like, I know. I just have to either change the part or cut it. I need an update like I needed.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I know what you mean. I feel this is a. This is a first. This first time I'm ever saying this out loud in the world. This is an exclusive, so everybody lean in. I've decided I don't love jewelry or accessories of any kind.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm with you on that.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

So a blunt haircut. That is my accessory.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, okay.

[Katherine Law]

That's cute.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Okay. Yeah.

[Katherine Law]

This is a lot of different hairstyles.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, it's.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It's not even all of them.

[Chelsea Handler]

Wait, oh, what were you, like, in the 90s? I see.

[Katherine Law]

I'm loving those.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I am, too, but they're nostalgic. They're making me kind of sad.

[Chelsea Handler]

God, you look a lot like this friend of mine. Wow.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Is it Dame Judi Dench?

[Chelsea Handler]

Wow. Yes. She and I have just gotten very tight. She's actually upstairs.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, my God. I heard her.

[Katherine Law]

Oh, hey, have you been thinking about writing into Dear Chelsea? Well, now is the moment. We're taking advice questions on anything that pops up. It's wedding season. Are you having wedding drama? Write in about that thing that you can't seem to agree with your spouse about, but you absolutely know you're right. Chelsea can tell you who's right and who's wrong. You can write in about a big life decision or just something small dating drama. Write in to dearchelsea podcastmail.com introducing the

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

all new Mazda CX5, featuring more connection. Hey, Google, where's the nearest Pilates class safety that has your back? More discovery on the scenic routes, more passion in the details and more control in changing weather. The all new Mazda CX5 more to move every side of you. See it in 5 [e-mail] 5score Google is a trademark of Google LLC.

[Chelsea Handler]

Sequences shortened and simulated for business owners and entrepreneurs there is a constant challenge getting things done fast and done well. Why not have both? That's why Wix Harmony stands out. It's an AI website builder that helps create a website quickly without compromising your vision. A fully functional site can be built for any business just by describing the idea. Then you can choose to chat with AI or edit everything manually to get it exactly right. There's also Aria, an AI agent available to answer questions or help complete tasks. And here's what makes it even better. Aria doesn't just live in a chat box. You can click anywhere on your site and ask her to make changes instantly. It's these details that make creating with Wix Harmony feel seamless. Join millions of businesses already using Wix and try Wix Harmony for [e-mail] Harmony that's wix.com Harmony in New Zealand. Quality is an acclaim. It's the standard K9 natural baked and coated starts with premium animal ingredients from grass fed red meat to cage free poultry and sustainably sourced fish with 40% high protein and no meals, fillers or grains. Every bite delivers real nutrition. Light, crispy pieces are baked then coated in rich bone broth for incredible taste and whole body health support. Baked and coated from K9 Natural use code Chelsea20 for 20% off your first order at US K9feline.natural.com May is mental health Awareness month and it's about more than just awareness. It's about taking the next step and getting support if you need it. Some people think therapy is too expensive. They're not sure it's going to work. And that's exactly what Rula is built to fix. Rula makes therapy feel a lot more approachable and honestly, a lot more human. Rula makes accessing quality mental health care affordable with sessions costing an average of $15 with insurance. Rula works with your insurance company offering personalized cost estimates upfront with no hidden fees. Find a great therapist in as little as five minutes and get an appointment as soon as the next day. Rula can help you feel better with 93% of patients reporting symptom improvements. So turn off the talk track that's keeping you from progress and head to rula.com that's r u l a.com to find a therapist, the easy way. I love all that you're saying, because I think when you're younger. Yeah, you're right. Like, you're describing. What you're describing is, like, this sense of freneticism where you're kind of just almost like a balloon, you know, like you're bouncing around, and you're just kind of catching to see what catches and what doesn't. And the good thing about that youthfulness that I think you're able to take into your adult life is that when things don't work, it doesn't matter because there's so much static and energy that you're like, okay, what's next? What's next? And I kind of feel that way today in a much more grounded sense, like what you're describing. When things don't work out, there's no big reaction. Like, with professional stuff, you're like, oh, okay, well, that happens all the time. I know that now. So it's nothing to get so upset about. Whereas when I was younger, it would be a huge reaction. And then a week later, you would forgot that that even happened.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And then also a week later, you would go, thank God that didn't happen, because then this wouldn't be able to happen. So learning that lesson over time, the, you know, my favorite Niecy Nash, you know, she didn't invent it, but I heard it from her. Rejection is God's protection. That thing of, like. But I wanted that thing, and that was gonna be the thing, and I thought this was the thing. And then when it's not the thing, you're like, thank God that wasn't the thing, because this is the thing. And if I was over there doing this thing, I couldn't have done this thing.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right. Right?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

So I think, like, you say over time, the more times that happens to you, which is in this business, all that happens over and over and over and over again, then you start to learn, oh, there's a rhythm to this. There is enough work for everybody. Everything happens when it's supposed to. It just is.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you. Are you one of those people who thinks everything that happens happens for a reason?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah, I don't know about that. I just am in this new. Like, I'm starting to sort of. Let me say this. I listen to the telepathy tapes, okay? Steve and I listen to them, and they've really kind of changed a lot of stuff for us. You know, it just. Now there. Now there's a lot of new questions for me, and it's all positive and it's. It's starting to make me. I'm getting kisses, full kisses now.

[Katherine Law]

Is that all right? With consent.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Are you kidding me?

[Chelsea Handler]

I can't believe you're getting sexually assaulted.

[Katherine Law]

We're gonna need some bug Cam.

[Chelsea Handler]

I love it.

[Katherine Law]

I just hope this is it doesn't wind up on wiki feed.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I do pretty well on only fans.

[Chelsea Handler]

She has a foot account, so she can just download it or upload it to that.

[Katherine Law]

We'll just have our podcam going.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It goes straight to it anytime someone takes a shot of my foot.

[Chelsea Handler]

I thought you meant Catherine was blowing kisses at you. I was like, that's very unusual. Never heard you do that.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

That I would not have acknowledged.

[Chelsea Handler]

I just would have allowed it to happen quietly.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, I just, I. I don't know if everything happens for a reason, but I am all of a sudden. And it's kind of gross to me because I think of myself as this like New York City girl who, you know, smokes cartons of cigarettes, doesn't give a shit about anything. You know, I show up, I do shit, you don't like it, too bad I trip into something else. I eat Snickers bars for breakfast. That's the me that I still think I am at my core. When you're looking at right now in real time at this 56 year old woman with a bob haircut, you know, who drove in a nice car, I don't feel like this lady. I feel like that lady. So when things come out of my mouth, like I've been listening to the telepathy tapes and now I'm questioning things like quantum physics and you know, like universal intelligence. Universal intelligence, which to me that sounds

[Katherine Law]

so much like what you're talking about. Like it all was existing and you're like, yes, I'm going to grab this opportunity and that opportunity and it goes right along with what, you know, what they talk about in the telepathy tapes about like all of that intelligence exists and it's just, do you have access to it? Can you tap into it? That sort of thing.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

But my reason, I think, for arriving at this new excited time about learning about this stuff, whether it's real or true or not, just wanting to know more about it, meditation, journaling, these words are coming out of my mouth, which is like, what? But the reason is because there was an emergency. And the emergency was the world started to like really affect me physically. And it felt like, oh, if I want to keep momming and wifing and friending and working and living I better, like, find some tools right now. And all of a sudden, all that judgment about centering and being open to listening to my body and all these things, I was like, oh, I see. Some of this really does make a lot of sense. And now I have this really rigorous morning routine that I do.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I love it. Tell us, what do you do? I love this. I mean, I think you love this

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

because, you know what's funny, Chelsea? You and I, 10 years ago, would have been sitting together, chain smoking, laughing about this shit together.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, but.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

But the. The world. What's happened in the world, or. I don't know.

[Chelsea Handler]

I think it's also as you age, you just. As you age, and it's a byproduct. It is a definitely, like a California LA thing also that is on the fast track. Like, my New York friends are not as, like, into all the shit that I am in. Yeah, but you definitely get to an age, like. I mean, for you, it was more of a health issue, I remember. And for me, it was a mental health issue. It was like. Well, both. Yeah, exactly. It's all connected. And so it is a health issue. It's just like everything that's been working doesn't work anymore. And you have to figure out a different coping mechanism, so to speak, a different set of tools to actually carry you through and lift you up. Because all of the devices that you had been using or that had been working for you just don't seem to

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

work anymore or are backfiring or are doing the opposite.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, Oprah always says, this thing, things work for you until they don't. And I would always be like, what the fuck does that mean? Yeah, I don't understand what that means. Until I understood what that meant exactly. My bravado, my loudness, this big cover that I had for myself, or this big kind of protective armor that I had worked for me for a long time until it's like, okay, now what?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I want someone to come in.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah. And then you're invulnerable and you're like, okay, what am I covering up? What's inside that I'm scared to reveal what's going on. So, like, I think it is a natural way of growing and evolving as a woman especially.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Well, I don't know about you, but I have received calls from so many girlfriends in my life who, over the years, I sort of look at as the, like, normal ones. You know, they've never had major health problems or major depression or major this or that. They're not Artists, so to speak, have called me in the last several years, like almost on the DL from their closet going, something is going on. I think I'm losing my mind. And I'm like, no, you're not losing your mind. Here's what's happening. First of all, we're getting to. We're women of a certain age, right? Nobody ever talked about that. I was never told about that. So first, get to your doctor and get your blood levels checked, period.

[Chelsea Handler]

Get your hormones checked everywhere. And sometimes feel like you're losing your shit. First get your hormones checked.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah. And sometimes that's it. And you get that adjusted or you do whatever you have to do health wise to get that adjusted. But then also I think at the same time, for those of us with kids who had kids around the same time, you start to come to that point where your kid is now launching into the world, and the world that your kid is launching into today is for many of us, quite terrifying.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

So I agree. All of a sudden it's like, okay, what do you got for me? Because you and I, I think, have, have a similar speed, which is like, I see the brick wall. Everyone is telling me there's the brick wall. And not only am I going to like, accelerate into the brick wall because now you're telling me that there's a brick wall, but I'm gonna go through that brick wall and I'm gonna show you that on the other side of it, like, good things are, are to come for me. Well, guess what? That doesn't work that way.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

So I, I sort of push myself, you know, health wise and work wise, overextending myself through those walls till I was like, oh, okay, this is what people mean by, you know, take a minute or, you know, maybe this one thing that you're doing is, isn't working for you. And it's okay to admit that. So I just. Now when I wake up in the morning, I've not invented any of this, that you're going to wreck every single thing. You're going to go, oh, yeah, that's from this. That's from this. I just have this little toolbox now. Gross. Even that. I'm saying toolbox is gross. I wake up in the morning, the very first thing I do, if it's dark or light, I have to be outdoors. I don't care where I am, I step outdoors. If it's a place I can be barefoot, then I'm barefoot. I stand outside and I sort of look around and I've started Doing this thing that I heard Patti Smith say, which is I thank something first. First thing in the day I thank something. I catch myself thanking my four cur for getting my food to my mouth internally sometimes now. But I will thank, you know, whatever's the first thing that comes to mind or to cite. Then I will journal. I will do my daily meditation. I have to do one to two meditations a day.

[Chelsea Handler]

How long do you journal for?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Typically journaling can be five minutes. I can be swept away by it and then go do the rest of my morning routine, come back and I'm doing it for another hour and it becomes something else that's for work or whatever, have to move my body, have to listen to music, have to eat, which I know sounds ridiculous, but there would be days where I would be like, I have to get this project done, I have to get this thing done, I have to get these emails done, I have to get my son's whatever done. And it's four o' clock and I haven't eaten and I'm wondering why. So it's just really like there's nothing earth shattering about any of it. It's basic stuff, but from somebody who has spent their life, you know, swirling through these. I've had 10 lifetimes. People go, oh, you were, you were in a band for all those years traveling around the world. When did that happen? But then how were you also doing these four TV shows that you were co creating and you were in and, but then how were you also you raise a kid, now he's, you have a 20 year old and you were there for every, every robotics match and you're a wife and you were at all of the tapings for the, this like wait, how are all those people? So I'm enjoying this stage of like, I don't know, I don't know everything. I don't know all the answers. And when I, I read about a tip or I hear Patti Smith say try thanking even the physical objects in your life, I go, all right. And I try it and some of the things have stuck. And now I feel slowly like I am more centered than I have ever been in my life, which is so awesome.

[Chelsea Handler]

I also think the language that we use around our toolbox, like, I know you're saying it's gross because you know, whatever because you don't want everyone.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It's not very punk rock, but, but

[Chelsea Handler]

it is punk rock to be cool about your emotional toolbox. Do you know what I mean? You can make that punk rock.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like it is punk rock. Because it fucking works. And people change.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

And they realize, like, oh, actually, the way for me to be the most effective and, like, luscious human being is to get a fucking toolbox. You know what I mean? That makes. There's like a magnetic attraction between you and the world when you're walking outside in the morning, looking at the trees and thanking them for being there, you know? But I can relate to everything you're saying.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Just hearing it come out of your mouth makes me laugh.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know, I know. And at the beginning, when I started doing this, like, what you're talking about, when I started meditating, when I started. When I went into real therapy, when I did all that stuff, I would just be like, oh, God, I can't tell anyone about this. People are gonna be like, what are you talking about? Like, I have, like a personality change. Like, it's like I gotta a personality transplant. Because there's like a transitional period of time where you're like, what am I doing? And who am I acting like? And is this real? Am I. And then you'd like hiding it, you know, I'd be meditating. I'm like, okay, nobody could see me doing this. It's a secret. It's like, actually, it works better if you don't give a shit who's seeing you meditate. You know what I mean?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It's so true.

[Chelsea Handler]

You got to be loud and brave about all the things that you're into at the time. And it's okay to change your mind and be into other things that you believe are helping you. That's cool.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I was on a red carpet the other day at south by Southwest, and this young woman said, what kind of music are you listening to these days? And I just was totally honest with her. I said, you know what I'm listening to on rotation on Spotify? Calming piano music for dogs.

[Katherine Law]

That's not very punk rock.

[Chelsea Handler]

I was looking for a sound. I like to sleep to the rain machine. Right? That rain app that you get on your phone. And I was looking for a sound. And I was with this guy the other night, and he was like, can we please just not have a thunderstorm? Like, it's very. He's like, it's very unsettling.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

You're like, this isn't getting you hot.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm like, I need it to sleep. I need some sort of rain. I love the rain. And he's like. And so he's searching all the sounds, and one came up was a food court ambient. No, no. And I'm like, who the fuck wants to listen to that as they go to sleep? And who, who's sleeping in a food court to even know that they like that sound? But some of those sounds are just like, oh, this makes no sense. But who knows what people are into?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I guess when I first moved to California, my mom sent me this is how long ago it was cassettes of New York street sounds because it was so quiet, it creeped me out. And I would play cassettes of just New York City street.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, that's cute. That is cute. That I like. Yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And if I had grown up in a food court, maybe that's what I would be listening to.

[Chelsea Handler]

We don't know that you didn't grow up in a, a food court, let's be honest.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Stay tuned.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Introducing the all new Mazda CX5 featuring more connection. Hey Google, where's the nearest Pilates class safety that has your back? More discovery on the scenic routes, more passion in the details and more control in changing weather. The all new Mazda CX5 more to move every side of you. See it in five films at mazdausa.com fivesides Google is a trademark of Google LLC.

[Chelsea Handler]

Sequences shortened and simulated. For business owners and entrepreneurs, there is a constant challenge getting things done fast and done well. Why not have both? That's why WIX Harmony stands out. It's an AI website builder that helps create a website quickly without compromising your vision. A fully functional site can be built for any business just by describing the idea. Then you can choose to chat with AI or edit. Edit everything manually to get it exactly right. There's also Aria, an AI agent available to answer questions or help complete tasks. And here's what makes it even better. Aria doesn't just live in a chat box. You can click anywhere on your site and ask her to make changes instantly. It's these details that make creating with WIX Harmony feel seamless. Join millions of businesses already using WIX and try WIX Harmony for [e-mail] Harmony that's wix.com Harmony in New Zealand. Quality is an acclaim. It's the standard K9 natural baked and coated starts with premium animal ingredients from grass fed red meat to cage free poultry and sustainably sourced fish. With 40% high protein and no meals, fillers or grains, every bite delivers real nutrition. Light crispy pieces are baked then coated in rich bone broth for incredible taste and whole body health support. Baked and coated from K9 natural use code Chelsea20 for 20% off your first order at US K9. Feline. There was a time that every time I thought about getting therapy, I'd have a full internal debate about it, and I talked myself out of it for a very long time. There's always the question of finding the right therapist, whether or not they take your insurance, and, of course, the trauma dump, updating them about your entire life story. That's why Rula actually makes this feel doable. They make it really easy to find a therapist who takes your insurance so you're not guessing or bracing for some surprise Bill later. With Rula, you can find someone qualified you like in about five minutes and have your first session as soon as tomorrow, which honestly removes, like, 90% of the excuses right there, because getting help should be easier than talking yourself out of it. Accessing quality mental health care is affordable with Rula. Sessions cost an average of $15 with insurance. Rula works with your insurance company, offering personalized cost estimates upfront with no hidden fees. So you can sign up and find a great therapist in as little as five minutes. It's fast, too. Appointments are available as soon as the next day. So head to rula.com, that's r u l a dot com, to find a therapist the easy way. First of all, we need to talk about your project Four Seasons.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yes, we do.

[Chelsea Handler]

We got off on a tangent about all of our new shenanigans. The second season of Four Seasons is out today on the day you're hearing this. So this is very exciting. It's a phenomenal show. Tina Fey created it with. You're married to Steve Carell in the show.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

In the show and the first season. If you haven't watched the first season, I don't want to spoil it for you because you might want to rewatch it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. If you haven't watched the first season, watch the first season before you watch the second season.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's good advice.

[Grace (Caller)]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

And are we gonna see any sort of. I know there's lots of, like, different couple situations happening in the show in season two. Are we gonna see any sort of, like, sexual. Any sort of swinging. Something like that? That's what I'm expecting to happen.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

You know what? I will say this about season two. Just like season one, as the scripts were rolling in, and I thought, oh, I know what's gonna happen now. Especially because it was based on a movie the first time on Alan Alda's film, you kind of knew what was coming. I was surprised. Every time this season, same thing. Every time a script came in, it was like a Delightful surprise. It was like, oh, I didn't. I never saw this coming. And this is exactly what should happen, so. Oh, there's so. I'm so excited about this season.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I'm so happy for you. That's a great role.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I'm happy for me too.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's perfect. I love it. Okay, well, you can tune in today, you guys. It's streaming on Netflix. If you're watching this on Netflix right now, switch over to four seasons.

[Katherine Law]

Oh, that's a good idea.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Your dog has an ankle fetish.

[Katherine Law]

I think she does. She's like licking my ankles now. So you said that she started licking my ankle.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I need an ankle licking dog.

[Chelsea Handler]

That would be a nice way to fall asleep with somebody licking your feet at night.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

But specifically, I think a dog.

[Katherine Law]

Well, our first question is our one drink question. So this is just a little shorty. This person says, I love my new little niece, but my brother and sister in law have the worst nickname for her. Her name is Naomi, but they exclusively call her Nipple.

[Chelsea Handler]

Whoa me.

[Katherine Law]

It makes me cringe so hard I feel like my stomach's gonna fall out through my butthole. They keep using the baby talk version of her name, and it feels like we're all expected to just join in. Can I just blatantly keep calling her by her government name? Brenda?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes. You can do whatever you want. You don't have to adopt a nickname because someone else adopts a nickname. Womi is a little tricky, but parents are allowed to do whatever the fuck they want with their children in terms of nicknames, you know, they just are.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah, yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And they'll change throughout the years too.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hopefully with Woemi, right?

[Katherine Law]

Yeah, let's hope.

[Chelsea Handler]

Naomi. I have a friend Naomi, and then my friends call her Nye. And I always have trouble with that too. Cause I'm like, nai, that doesn't. That's not euphonious to me.

[Katherine Law]

I've heard Nomi for Naomi, but whoa me is like a whole other thing.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Whoa me. It sounds like maybe they did it because the child wasn't able to say their own name. So they're sort of mimicking what the child.

[Katherine Law]

I think this is. This is like a little. An infant, I think, or that was what I told.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, hopefully when that infant starts talking, she could tell her parents to shut the up.

[Katherine Law]

Let's hope so. Well, our first color today is Grace.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I'm so nervous.

[Chelsea Handler]

Don't be. Don't be.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Look at you in your car.

[Katherine Law]

So Grace says, must I begin with how much of a Chelsea Fan? I am. I think not. We know how I ended up here. My friend of 16 years and her husband are due with their second child this month. They also have a toddler. Her husband's work schedule has a lot of out of town time for being a salesman at a local equipment rental company. Supposedly they sent him to the next state over for training recently and then to the far west side of the state this week. Oh, and they're sending him to Cabo. And while my friend could have gone, she's conveniently too close to her due date to fly. Hi. I'm feeling more and more sure that he is cheating on her and plan to call his company looking for a job to ask some questions related to how and where his training takes place and narrow down if I'm on track. The thing is, if I find out what I think is true, my friend doesn't have a lot of support from her family. And me and our other close friend live hours away. If I find out the truth, I couldn't stomach not telling her. But being so close to delivering their second child, I know it would really do a number on her. I just need some guidance to ensure my moral compass is guiding me in the right direction should I confront my friend about her investigation. Strongly suggests cheating husband. Grace.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi. Grace. Hi. Hi. This is our special guest, Carrie. Kenny Silver's here today. That's a conundrum. I understand your feelings. I've definitely felt that way in relationships before about my friends. But I do not think it is your job to investigate this matter. I understand that you wanna do everything for your friend and I would wanna do the same thing. But in the situation that she's in, which is about to give birth, like, she's already in a very vulnerable state and she's gonna need a lot of support and she'd probably end up. I mean, it's just adding on top of, you know, like, this is not the right time and if he is cheating on her, she's eventually going to find out. You bringing this information to her at this time would probably, if anything, do more damage to your relationship with her than it would to her relationship with her husband.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Do you agree with that? Exactly what I was gonna say. Also, I don't know if you're a mom, but I'll tell you that part. When you're about to have the baby and then right after you have the baby, this is about the baby and mom's mood is directly related to the health of this baby and then the bonding that happens after and P.S. my suspicion is that if you think this, she probably is way ahead of you on. On. On any thoughts? And I agree that it's maybe possibly the worst timing in the world.

[Grace (Caller)]

Thank y'.

[Chelsea Handler]

All.

[Grace (Caller)]

I definitely needed to hear that because, you know, it's such a conundrum of a position to be in. I did call and take asked as if I was inquiring about a job, if they do any training out of town, if they do any work out of town, and basically I was told, nope, we do all training in house. We don't ever send our guys, like, out of town. We aim for everybody to be home at the end of the day. So, you know, that just kind of, like, continues to confirm my suspicion. But I definitely agree with what y' all are saying about, you know, just supporting her and not making that move right this minute.

[Chelsea Handler]

What do you think, Carrie? And what do you guys think about saying something to the husband just to give him an idea that, you know, like, what do you think about that? That just popped into my head. Independent of your friend, like, leaving her out of it, being like, you know, like, kind of calling him out, like, just you and him, like, even just asking. No, I'm just throwing it out there. I'm not giving you this advice. I'm just wondering what impact that would have if you said, like, hey, just so you know, like, you know, I had a friend applied or I had a friend who was looking for a job who wanted to. Whatever. You can make up whatever lie you want to find out the information that you just found out, or I just thought your traveling sounded suspicious, so I called your work, and I actually found out that they don't send trainers out. I'm not gonna say anything to your friend right now. Like, your wife. I'm not going to say anything. I just want you to know that I see you. Like, I wonder if that would have any impact. What do you think?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

My personal feeling about the whole situation, All I can think about is this kid. And so I kind of feel like this is their journey, and your job is as her friend, and her job is as that mom. And this will work itself out how it's supposed to, but to light the fuse at a time that is not of their own making would possibly blow things up. Or, like Chelsea saying, could blow things up with your. Because you could also be wrong, and it could blow things up with your friendship forever. And she would be like, what are you doing trying to come between my kid, my husband, and. And my life? And that would be Horrible as well. So I fear for all of you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I think that's right. And being the only mother that's here in this conversation. Are you a mom? Okay, so let's. Let's defer to Carrie on that, too, because it is really the most important thing is for the child and for her to be healthy and to kind of get through this for, you know, initial time. And if at some point you find, like, irrefutable proof that that is indeed happening, then that's a different situation. But you doing detective work on her behalf, well, I think that shows you're a fucking awesome friend. I don't think it's helpful in this moment and in this situation down the road, if things start to escalate and you really see, like, he's being disrespectful to her and she's suffering, and these things are plainly obvious to everyone but her. Because I do kind of disagree that I think that sometimes women don't know what's going on, especially if they're pregnant and they're consumed with all of that, that. That you're kind of, like, not thinking about that kind of stuff. And some women are in denial about what their partner is doing. But I just think, yeah, just be as great of a friend as you can be while she's going through this time. Help her go through this time knowing what you suspect, but you still don't really know and see where you are in a year or even down the line, it may all reveal itself, and you may not have to ever say anything. But, you know, I appreciate the friendship and the fact that you're calling about this. I get it.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yeah. The bet. The bet. You can't lose by putting all of this energy that you have right now into being the best friend you can to someone who is about to have a baby. Because that way, if it does blow up, she'll know, oh, my friend is here. She's been here for me from the beginning. And I do have someone. Someone on my side, or if the relationship doesn't blow up. And it's not a thing, you have just made your relationship closer with her anyway. And it could be an anecdote you could laugh about years from now. So either way, you can't lose by just diving into your friendship and your help and her situation.

[Grace (Caller)]

I agree. Well, thank y'.

[Chelsea Handler]

All.

[Grace (Caller)]

I appreciate your input.

[Katherine Law]

All right.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thank you. And thank you for having a stable connection in your car. I appreciate that.

[Katherine Law]

You're so welcome. It does not always happen. Thanks, Grace.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm glad it worked out. Take care, Grace.

[Katherine Law]

All right, bye.

[Chelsea Handler]

Bye, you guys.

[Grace (Caller)]

Thank you.

[Katherine Law]

I actually think, having talked to her before, that advice probably is a relief to her.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Because I know she is very worried to deliver that news.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah. She was worried about it coming out and, you know, this sort of thing.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I had a friend once go through something like this. Like, you know, and I remember I had said something to the partner of the friend in front of everyone. And then when it was revealed, which was not revealed by me, it was revealed, the friend came back and was like, do you remember when you said that? And I was like, yeah. And she's like, were you suspicious in that moment? I said, yeah. And she goes, well, why didn't you say anything to me? I go, I did. I said it in front of everyone.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

She didn't want to hear it.

[Chelsea Handler]

This is weird. I go, I wasn't gonna push it beyond that. I didn't have any proof. I just felt like something was off.

[Katherine Law]

Right.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It was inkling.

[Chelsea Handler]

But my friend did not have that inkling at all. So I don't think you know, everyone

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

or was not ready for it or.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Or wasn't paying attention.

[Katherine Law]

And you raised such a good point about, like, she's pregnant. She's got a two year old. So this has been at least that she's like, not had the thought process of, like, is my husband running around?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

She's a little busy.

[Katherine Law]

She's busy.

[Chelsea Handler]

This goes back to my original comment when Carrie sat down that men are garbage.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Good night, everybody confirmed. Well, it is funny not to bring it back to the four seasons, but that is if you have watched season one. The whole. Everything revolves around the fact that Steve Carell, my husband, has been cheating on me for years. And that's what blows up this friendship.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's what gets you to get a couples retreat.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Exactly. So it's a.

[Chelsea Handler]

Have you ever done anything in real life like a couples retreat?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No. Well, in the four seasons, it's not a couples retreat. What it is is a group of friends of 25 years who travel together every season. So they were traveling any. We were traveling anyway. But you watch the downfall of our relationship through the travels and then what happens to the rest of the group? Group throughout the travels. But a couple's retreat.

[Chelsea Handler]

No one that would be specifically designed for, like, like, you know, enhancing your relationship or like, I just find those things like.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No. Ew.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I don't.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I mean, I may be like, meditating and journaling, but I'm not gonna, like, sit with my husband and be like,

[Katherine Law]

stare into each other's eyes.

[Chelsea Handler]

Just give it another 10 years. Next time we see each other, you're gonna come back and you'll be like, Chelsea, you're never gonna believe this. I'm running. I could actually. That would be a great character for you to play too. Somebody running a couple's retreat.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Yes.

[Katherine Law]

Well, we have a caller calling in now who is hopefully not a garbage man. I don't think he's a garbage man, but this is Joseph.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Wait, do you mean a man who

[Katherine Law]

is a man who is a piece of garbage? Not a collector of garbage?

[Chelsea Handler]

Not a collector of garbage. Those are probably great jobs.

[Katherine Law]

That might be his job, I'm not sure. But Joseph says. Dear Chelsea, my partner lost his mother about a year and a half ago. And the last year has been full of healing, grieving and family time. My partner's father Mike talked about dating or seeking a non romantic partner. And that idea was slowly accepted by the family. But it was still a surprise to hear it spoken of within a year. Recently, Mike has been seeing someone and it has quickly moved into a full on romantic affair that is being kept a secret. His girlfriend Stacy has spent time at the family cottage. After all, his children asked Mike not to take her there. My partner and I want Mike to be happy. But it started to feel so heavy to keep secrets within the family and to watch the overstepping of boundaries. My partner's sister is especially hurt and upset. At the end of the day, I just want to support my man and enjoy spending time with his family. We've expressed to Mike that we want to meet Stacy, but she told Mike she isn't ready for her ex husband to find out. And so this entire relationship is hush hush. Taking her to the cottage really hurt the family's feelings. Especially because my partner's late mother explicitly asked for anyone he'd eventually meet to stay away from the cottage. I'm most focused on what my partner is comfortable with and how we can best work as a team. So how do we convince his sister and siblings that it's okay if Mike moves on? Joseph.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi, Joseph.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Wow, Joseph. Hello.

[Joseph (Caller)]

How are you?

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi. I think I need. I think. Hi. This is Carrie Kenny. Hi. Our special guest today. I need a recap. I understand it's your partner's father's new girlfriend, is that correct?

[Joseph (Caller)]

That is correct, yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

And they know about her, but he won't bring her around.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Yeah. So since the letter, she is now been introduced to the family. But we've still had A ton of tension. And I think a lot of it has to do with just grieving that hasn't happened and worry that it's somehow going to take place of their mom, their mom's memory, if that makes sense.

[Chelsea Handler]

Of course.

[Katherine Law]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's natural. Yes.

[Katherine Law]

Can we also ask, like, what is the drama with the cottage? Like why is the family so averse to her going there?

[Joseph (Caller)]

I think initially my partner and I were just kind of floored that it wasn't being shared with everybody in the family. And the cottage was his mom's kind of final project that really was. Sat down on her deathbed and went through everything and how it was going to be coordinated and it was being contracted all leading up to that. So it was a space that also was then and it's owned now by the kids. It was trusted to them. And that's why I thought it was so important that what their wishes are, are honored about it as opposed to some getaway for their father. You know.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Can I ask you a question that is inappropriate and you can, you can tell me to fuck off?

[Joseph (Caller)]

Sure.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Is there an enormous age gap between the two of them and do any of you suspect that there is any sort of financial

[Chelsea Handler]

motivation?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Motivation?

[Joseph (Caller)]

I think that was a concern up front. But no, there's not a huge age gap. It's I think pretty relative. Like 10 years. So it's not a huge like outside of appropriate. And she is very. She's very successful in the same kind of realm that he is. Same business and industry.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

The reason I asked is because I have a friend who this happened to. Yeah, this woman jumped in way the junior of, of mom and took all the money.

[Katherine Law]

Well, it happens all the time. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

So.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Okay, so. So this really is about sentimental and mom's wishes and all the things. I lost my mom eight years ago. You knew my mom, she. My mom loved you. Thank you. I don't blame you, but I mean, I blame you a little.

[Chelsea Handler]

I just blame you actually for her mother's death.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Yeah. Sorry for bringing in that.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Well, we can't talk about it because it's still a legal issue. It's completed yet. But you know, she was my best friend. She was my. I could see how, you know, even as adults that that idea of. But. But that's mom and that's mom's place. My mom had a home that is now mine because I was her only child and I didn't even want renters in there. I mean I'm a 56 year old woman like my mom is no longer here. I still. I understand that. I do understand that, and especially if it involved. But at the same time, I do also understand that our time here is finite. And you guys, time with dad or dad in law is finite. His time on earth is finite. And that some things are worth setting aside so that we never know how many more times we have left with somebody. And is it really worth the. The like, angst. Angst that goes with the. What's mine is mine. What's yours is yours. What's yours is mine. What's mine is.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I agree with that totally. But also, it sounds like the mother was pretty specific about what she wanted to happen with this cabin. Right. That she didn't want anyone else in there, Especially if the partner, her ex husband or former husband, I should say, was with a new partner. Right. Did she specify that in her will and.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Yeah, that's correct. She definitely made mention of that very specifically at the end. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

So, like, that. That is worth, like saying for. For your partner or sisters or somebody to bring up to be like, this is really disrespectful. Like, we can understand that you want to have a relationship. You're a human being. That's your decision. If you're ready for that, that's fine. But this is a very specific instruction that we got. There's not a lot of gray area here, so it feels disrespectful to our mother. Again, you're not in, like, the nuclear family. You are a plus one right now. So I don't think it behooves you to get involved and get in the weeds in this. And I love the question, like, how do we work as a team so I can best support my partner? Like, that's lovely. And that's true. That's what you want to do, is you want to support whatever their decision may be, but it is valid that they are upset about this when they were. Because most people die and they don't give you specific instructions, and then everyone's just fighting for no reason without anything to point to. But this is pretty specific, especially with regard to that location. So that is kind of ick that the father is just like, disregarding that. But I guess your question is just how to be a better partner. And I think it's like, whatever your partner and his sister decide. How many kids are there in the family?

[Joseph (Caller)]

There's four.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, so there's four of them. And are they all kind of in accord or do they have disagreements about this?

[Joseph (Caller)]

I think at this point it's mostly just we want to support the sister and her feelings that are pretty big about this. And I think the brothers are pretty, Pretty okay with everything. They just want to see.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, they don't. No. Men don't care about anything. So that's fine.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

You know what? I think I figured it out. I think we need to stage a haunting. I think it's the only way out.

[Chelsea Handler]

You can borrow. You could borrow my house.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

We'll stage a haunted.

[Joseph (Caller)]

No, I'm good. I'm good on that.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And it will spook the shit out of this lady. She'll want out immediately. And then they'll go find a nice condo somewhere.

[Katherine Law]

Perfect.

[Chelsea Handler]

What takes place in a haunting exactly? Witches come or you?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Oh, this is going to be a dark haunting. No, no, no. I mean like. Like we fake it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Katherine Law]

Noises in the night.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes, noises in the night.

[Katherine Law]

Blankets being sold for me.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Branches lay out her old nightgowns on

[Chelsea Handler]

the bison running through the pipes. Stuff like that. That's good.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Yeah. A creative project could. Could be a good solution.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

It could bring everyone together.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, a nice light touch. Well, what I would say, as the partner of somebody who has a sister, always side with the sister. You know what I mean? You don't fucking want her on your bad side. Yeah, the men don't care. They're benign. They'll go whichever way the wind blows. But women, just stick with the women. You are there for her, support her. And if she needs you to side with her, then side with her.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Perfect. That's crystal clear. I can do that. That.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, great.

[Katherine Law]

So thanks so much for your loss too.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, thanks for calling in. Thank you.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Sorry for your mom's loss as well. And take care. Thank you. I appreciate it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thank you.

[Katherine Law]

Thanks.

[Joseph (Caller)]

Bye.

[Katherine Law]

See, not garbage.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I mean, now I feel bad that the phrase garbage person ever came up and then this little sweet pea shows up.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I thought he was gay.

[Katherine Law]

He is. Yes, he is.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, that's why I know they're not garbage.

[Katherine Law]

They're never garbage.

[Chelsea Handler]

They're not garbage.

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[Chelsea Handler]

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[Chelsea Handler]

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[Katherine Law]

You want one more? I got a little you Have a little quickie?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, a quickie, sure. We'll take a quickie to go out on.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I mean, always take the quickie.

[Katherine Law]

We can actually take these off. Cause this one's just an email.

[Chelsea Handler]

But why? They look so fashionable.

[Katherine Law]

I know. So gorgeous. So Allie says. Dear Chelsea, I've gotten myself into a bit of a situation. I'm a single mom of two teen boys, which leaves little time and energy to put into a serious relationship right now. This year I met a man that's 15 years older than me. We hung out a few times.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Sorry, I thought she was saying he's 15. I was like, wait, hold on.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'll just.

[Katherine Law]

I'll start pausing after they get to.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Okay, thank you.

[Katherine Law]

We hung out a few times and really enjoyed getting to know each other. And one night he kissed me. The problem is he's been married for 36 years and told me he was in an open marriage. I'm a woman's woman and I had an issue with being more than just friends with this guy. He and his wife built a new home and both have their own bedrooms. So one night he asked me to come stay the night with him. His wife would be on the other end of the house in her room. I couldn't wrap my mind around it until he broke it down for me. Me, 14 years ago.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Pure rum. This is how I feel about your question.

[Katherine Law]

Fourteen years ago, he found out his wife was having a full blown affair and she begged him not to leave her as she didn't want anyone to know of her affair, including the kids, and she'd never cheat again. They agreed to stay together, but he's allowed to step out. Now. All of this would be okay, but he and I have caught feelings for each other and it's no longer just a casual meeting. He even told his wife about me and her problem isn't that he's stepping out, it's that I'm 15 years younger and single. I don't know how long I can do this, but I've fallen for this man. I'd love to hear your perspective on this. As the woman in me wants to shake myself and tell myself to quit messing with a married man. But the lover in me says to follow my heart and believe everything happens for a reason.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Okay, quick question.

[Katherine Law]

Yes. Yes.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Because I started shenanigans. I stopped listening for half a second. How old are her children?

[Katherine Law]

Teens.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

No, just stop.

[Chelsea Handler]

Stop. Run as fast as you can away from this situation.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Let me tell you something. You have four minutes with these children. Four minutes with these babies, and then they are out in the world. You are going to blink your eyes and then all of a sudden you're going to hope they're going to want to come back for Thanksgiving and then, you know, have the rest of your life and help care for you as you get older and want to be part of and want to be, you know, them. Just meet your hopeful grandchildren and all the things. It's a blink of an eye. And I understand why you're going through it, especially with two. I only have one, but I understand it feels like this is forever. And when it. And I am telling you, you're going to wake up one day in an empty house and you're going to go, oh, my gosh, all I want to do is just have one more hour with that person, that you know, smelly kid and his Axe body spray, and you're not going to have that. And. And right now is such a time when the kids are pushing away. It's their job, it's genetic, it's supposed to happen. It's science that they're pushing away. So you, I understand as a parent, you think, oh, well, they're off doing their own thing anyway. They don't need me. They need you. They need you energetically. They need you. You know, most people can't be home when their kids get home from school. It's just the way it is. The economy is in this country right now. And for me, in my business, I was away a lot. That was the nature of our circus family business. But when I could be there, when I could be there in case, he said, hey, I have a question, or I'm thinking about this. He always knew I was open and available and ready and. And that, to me, is how I can sleep at night now. You have lots of time and you have seconds left with these people in your home at this stage of their life, is all I'm saying. Just at this stage. And this is a vital stage. That's my take.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, I think that's a great point to bring up because it wouldn't have been my point, but it is a point. Because my point is this isn't a relationship that is easily explainable to anybody. And imagine having to explain it to your children that your boyfriend lives with his wife and that you get to go over there and sleep over sometimes when she's okay with it. But her real concern is that, like, it's all so fucking messy. There are a million people in this world. There are millions of men and women everywhere that are single and looking. I don't believe me. Go on my Instagram. I just was trying to hook people up. I have like one and a half million DMs from women and men that are looking to pair up. People want to be with other people. There are so many more suitable suitors that you could bring home that you could have involved in your life in a more natural, organic way that you don't have to explain the story of.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

And I will also tell you even more importantly, I believe as a parent, parent, I'm not a perfect parent by any stretch of the imagination. I'm, you know, some of this stuff is based on stuff that I've made, stuff I've made mistakes on, but not this one in particular. But even worse would be if you're thinking, well, the kids won't know where I am. I'm going to tell them that I met so and so. Let me tell you something. The kids are going to know where you are or if the kids sense at anything at all like you are, are not telling them the truth in some way or that it's not their business in some way as they're about to enter the world and learn how to trust people and have partners and do all those things, that's going to be an underlying thing in their life. And I'm sorry, but when you have kids, that's part of your responsibility. That's my feeling. And it's harsh, I know, but it's

[Chelsea Handler]

like also, if one of your kids came to you with this dynamic and asked you what they, what they should do, what would you tell them?

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

I also think you deserve better. I think you deserve. You do a full situation.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, he's married. That's it. It doesn't matter if you're in love with him. He's married. Period. So let's move on. Problem solved. Find another person. Actually, don't find another person. Take a time out because you made a bad decision. Take a time out. Go spend time with your kids. And then when someone comes into your life that is acceptable, respectable and respectful to you and your situation that wants to be a part, an addition to your family in some capacity, then that's great. But not this person. Those are our thoughts. And Godspeed. There we go. And we'll see you next week on Netflix. Anyway, Kerry Kearney Silver is in the new season of Four Seasons. Please make sure you go from this to that.

[Carrie Kenny Silver]

Click.

[Katherine Law]

Foreign. If you want advice from Chelsea, write in to dearchelsea podcastmail.com Dear Chelsea is a production of I Heart Media. Follow Chelsea on all Socials Elseehandler and find Catherine on TikTok flash cadabra dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brandon Dickert Executive Producer Katherine Law. Find full video episodes and minisodes now on Netflix and get tickets to see Chelsea live@chelsea handler.com.

[Chelsea Handler]

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[Chelsea Handler]

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[Katherine Law]

Com.

[Chelsea Handler]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.