Making Out with Josh Radnor

Summary

Dear Chelsea Podcast Summary

Episode: Making Out with Josh Radnor
Host: Chelsea Handler (with co-host Catherine Law)
Guest: Josh Radnor
Date: January 29, 2026

---

Episode Overview

In this lively and candid episode of "Dear Chelsea," Chelsea Handler and co-host Catherine Law are joined by actor, musician, and podcaster Josh Radnor. The trio delves into Josh's creative journey, reminisces about a memorable “make-out” encounter between Chelsea and Josh, and offers heartfelt, humorous advice to listeners on relationships, change, and vulnerability.

---

Main Discussion Points & Key Insights

1. Chelsea & Josh’s Past Connection (04:00 – 05:25)

• Chelsea and Josh reconnect and reminisce about their brief romantic encounter two decades ago.
• Chelsea jokes about not remembering if they ever slept together, to which Josh clarifies:
  Josh: “We didn’t sleep together but we made out – I’m happy to talk about it on the podcast if you want” (04:12)
• Light-hearted banter about their first meeting at the Improv comedy club and Chelsea’s notorious first impression.

2. Josh’s Music & Artistic Journey (05:28 – 09:00)

• Josh discusses his transition into music with his new album, Eulogy, Volume Two, and Chelsea’s surprise at this career turn.
• Comparison between musicians and actors: Josh: “The musicians I’ve met… have been incredibly generous, cool, collaborative people. Acting is maybe a little more…mercenary.” (06:07)
• Both discuss the creative benefits of spreading yourself across multiple disciplines.

3. Creative Process & Collaboration (07:19 – 09:00)

• Josh shares how creative ideas take different forms: songs, scripts, or films.
• Chelsea touches on artistic restlessness and the need to pursue multiple ventures.

4. Personal Life: Sobriety, Marriage, and Happiness (09:26 – 13:00)

• Josh is “California sober” (no alcohol, but uses weed and psychedelics): Josh: “I haven’t had a drink in about seven or eight years… I still like altering the consciousness, just not with booze anymore.” (10:01)
• Married, lives in Brooklyn with his psychologist wife and their dog, Nelson.
• Chelsea quips about adapting her own drinking habits due to “all this other good stuff available now.”

5. How I Met Your Mother & Dealing with Fame (11:10 – 17:40)

• Josh hosts How We Made Your Mother, a rewatch podcast with co-creator Craig Thomas, spurred by his wife never seeing the show.
• Discusses the oddity of living in people’s minds as a character: Josh: “It’s such a head trip… when they meet me, it’s almost like I offend them by having another life and another name.” (14:40)
• Reflecting on the difficulty of navigating fame, anonymity, and the emotional rollercoaster of a nine-year TV run.

6. Therapy, Self-Reflection, and Growth (17:39 – 19:00)

• Both Chelsea and Josh touch on the importance of therapy and continuous creative evolution.
• Josh credits his growth as a musician to working closely with songwriter Ben Lee, emphasizing commitment to craft.

7. Joy in Daily Life and Marriage Dynamics (19:06 – 22:16)

• Josh’s happiness comes from “good writing days,” simple pleasures, and the stability of his marriage.
• Chelsea asks about having a psychologist as a spouse. Josh praises his wife’s “great story instincts” and their balanced relationship.
• Introduces the “toolbox, tissue box, or soapbox” communication framework for handling emotional situations.

8. New York vs. LA Lifestyle (22:11 – 24:39)

• Both reminisce on food and lifestyle differences between New York and LA.
• Josh mentions recently selling his LA house and embracing New York’s vibrant, late-night energy.
• Chelsea jokes about her own “elderly LA” bedtime routine and her hunger for New York’s dynamism.

---

Listener Questions & Advice (Advice Segment)

1. Red Flags in a Marriage (Nikki’s Story) (28:43 – 34:54)

• Nikki worries her husband’s late-night texting to another woman is a “huge red flag.”
• All agree: this breach of trust requires immediate, serious attention. Chelsea: “To make the first time the last time… you have to get into counseling right away.” (30:37) Josh: “Live your life in such a way that no one needs to go through your phone.” (31:51)
• Advice: Seek couples therapy, address the betrayal, and monitor for recurring patterns.

2. Navigating Sibling Relationships as Life Changes (Allie’s Story) (38:30 – 43:12)

• Allie feels “adrift” as her extremely close brother enters a serious relationship.
• Josh offers a metaphor:
  Josh: “If we’re a solar system… your brother was Mercury, but he might have to be Venus. You’re still in the system, just a little further out.” (40:34)
• Advice: Lean into other relationships, interests, and self-growth—don’t overanalyze or play games; “lead with love.”

3. Workplace Crush & Taking the Leap (Stephanie’s Story) (44:36 – 51:04)

• Stephanie is crushing hard on her boss, who may reciprocate but office politics make a move risky. Chelsea: “You’ve got to get rid of the rejection part – that’s just part of life… you can't be afraid of it.” (46:20) Josh: “I was just wondering…if we could maybe work in like a little bit of making out and just see what that’s like.” (47:43)
• Advice: Stephanie is encouraged to make a move, communicate her feelings, and not fear rejection, as the risk of regret outweighs temporary discomfort.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Their Old Make-Out:
  “You look like a terrorist – and then you walked away. But then later that night we ended up making out.”
  – Josh Radnor (04:54)

• On Creative Multiplicity:
  “Different ideas need a different form. Sometimes I have an idea and I’m like, well, that’s a movie. Another, that’s a four-minute song.”
  – Josh Radnor (08:20)

• On Alcohol-Free Life:
  “I didn't have an off switch with alcohol. I have it with everything else.”
  – Josh Radnor (10:31)

• Audience Relationships to Characters:
  “It’s so weird…when they meet me, it’s almost like I offend them by having another life and another name.”
  – Josh Radnor (14:40)

• On Navigating Change:
  “Don’t punish anyone for these circumstances…lead with love.”
  – Chelsea Handler (41:24)

• On Rejection & Love:
  “If you don’t want to be rejected, then you almost don’t deserve to be in love – you have to experience rejection, that’s just the way it goes.”
  – Chelsea Handler (46:20)

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 04:00 — Chelsea & Josh recall their first meeting and make-out story
• 06:07 — Differences between actors & musicians
• 09:26 — Josh on marriage, sobriety, and happiness
• 14:40 — Fame, character confusion, and identity
• 19:13 — Finding personal joy and marriage dynamics
• 28:43 — Listener advice: Marriage trust violation
• 38:30 — Listener advice: Sibling relationship shifts
• 44:36 — Listener advice: Taking a chance on a work crush

---

Tone & Style

The conversation throughout is warm, irreverent, and deeply honest—full of Chelsea’s signature bluntness and humor, met with Josh’s thoughtful, soulful commentary. The advice segments are empathetic but never sugar-coated, often blending practical tips with open-hearted encouragement.

---

Conclusion

This episode delivers a perfect blend of comedic nostalgia, creative reflection, and actionable, heartfelt advice. Whether you’re navigating old flames, new passions, changing family dynamics or romantic risk-taking, Chelsea and Josh bring wit, honesty, and reassurance to every listener’s dilemma.

---

Josh Radnor’s Album:
Eulogy, Volume Two – available on all major platforms.

See Chelsea Handler live:
Tour dates and tickets at chelseahandler.com.

Submit questions:
[e-mail]

---

Transcript

[Chelsea Handler]

This is an i heart podcast guaranteed.

[Catherine]

Human did you know tide has been upgraded to provide an even better clean in cold water tide is specifically designed to fight any stain you throw at it even in cold butter yup chocolate ice cream sure thing barbecue sauce tide's got you covered you don't need to use warm water additionally tide pods let you confidently fight tough stains with new coldzyme technology just remember if it's gotta be clean it's gotta be tied if.

[Chelsea Handler]

You'Re looking for a wine that's not just delicious but also a total crowd pleaser let me introduce you to josh sellars this california wine brand has over a dozen award winning wines from crisp sauvignon blancs to velvety merlots josh sellars has the perfect wine for every occasion serving up a juicy steak at your next barbecue their cabernet sauvignon is the perfect pairing unwinding with friends after a long week you can't go wrong with their pinot grigio with so many delicious wines to choose from from josh sellars has something for everyone josh sellars is a proud sponsor of dear chelsea visit www dot joshcellars dot com chelsea and join the wine club to get twenty percent off please drink responsibly for the first time ever there has been a truly beautiful medical breakthrough one shot makes you hot but with terrifying consequences in the new original series fx's the beauty the glamorous world of supermodels turns deadly as mysterious deaths draw in fbi agents and a shadowy billionaire who will stop at nothing to protect his empire from executive producer ryan murphy fx's the beauty now streaming on hulu and hulu on disney for bundle subscribers everyone deserves to.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

Be connected that's why t mobile and us cellular are joining forces switch to t mobile and save up to twenty percent versus verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out check the math at t mobile dot com switch and now t mobile is in us cellular.

[T-Mobile Announcer 2]

Stores savings versus comparable verizon plan plus the cost of optional benefits plan features and texas and fees vary savings with three plus lines include third line free via monthly bill credits credit stop if you cancel any lines qualifying credit required.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi catherine hi chelsea hi i'm in recovery mode oh did you you didn't have a spill did you oh no no no not that kind of recovery i had a i had a lot of for the last week and they and a lot of action a lot of people a lot of things and i am really i just slept probably sixteen hours on monday and another twelve hours yesterday so i'm starting to feel back to myself i have vegas this.

[Catherine]

Weekend oh good you gotta prepare yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

I have some new material that i have to test out for my new tour the high and mighty tour which starts on february thirteenth which we've actually made some additions to we've added some shows we added los angeles i will be performing at the netflix is a joke festival that's on may sixth we added rohnert park california the pre sale is live now april third i'll be in rohnert park and also we added atlantic city which is on valentine's day february fourteenth so those new shows have just been added to my high and mighty tour and my first two shows out of the gate will be in washington dc atlantic city and then norfolk virginia february thirteenth fourteenth fifteenth i will.

[Catherine]

See you there excellent well i'm excited.

[Chelsea Handler]

About our guest today yes our guest today has a new album called eulogy volume two and he is the host of the podcast how we made youe mother so please welcome josh radner hi.

[Josh Radner]

Josh radner hi chelsea how are you.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'M good how are you doing you look so professorial with all of those books i like the like the salt and pepper hair and then the books behind you it's painting quite a picture.

[Josh Radner]

You got just the vibe i'm going.

[Chelsea Handler]

For you know what i was thinking on my way over to record this podcast today i was thinking oh i'm interviewing josh radner and then i was like how do i know josh and then i was like did josh and i ever sleep together we didn't sleep.

[Josh Radner]

Together but we made out i'm happy to talk about it on the podcast.

[Chelsea Handler]

If you want great well we're recording.

[Josh Radner]

So let's get started okay yeah you know how we met is matt boren and jessica golden i think oh jessica.

[Chelsea Handler]

Golden i remember jessica do you know where she is today jessica golden she.

[Josh Radner]

Wrote me a couple months ago but.

[Chelsea Handler]

Remind me no i don't know i'm cur i haven't seen her in years.

[Josh Radner]

I haven't either i'll have to check my text but they took me to an evening that you were emceeing somewhere melrose what's the comedy club there improv yeah the improv maybe you were and i think it was my first season hiatus of how i met yout mother and i had a big long like hiatus beard oh yes it's coming back.

[Chelsea Handler]

To me now you came up to.

[Josh Radner]

The bar and i said great job and your first words to me you said you look like a terrorist and then you walked away but then later that night we ended up making out.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh i knew something happened i'm so glad my memory isn't just shot you know what i mean yeah but it.

[Josh Radner]

Was twenty years ago and we didn't sleep together i do remember that okay.

[Chelsea Handler]

Great well that's great information to have i'm glad and did we make out at the improv or did we make.

[Josh Radner]

It out no no no you came to my little apartment for a little while and then didn't you have a.

[Chelsea Handler]

Roommate no oh okay i might be confusing you with someone else now anyway it's great to see you again yeah.

[Josh Radner]

Great to see you again i've seen.

[Chelsea Handler]

You in ages and now you're married well first of all you're a musician and an actor i mean forgive me for not knowing this but i didn't even know you were a musician now this is great information to have and to spread the word he has a new album called eulogy vol two so there's a eulogy volume one i'm assuming which i'm gonna listen to as soon as possible correct yeah okay here's a serious question who is the more annoying group of artists as a successful actor and musician now that i know you're both who is more annoying as a group of artists musicians or actors i.

[Josh Radner]

Don'T know i don't think of i don't classify people by their level of annoyance but i will say that the musicians i've met especially in los angeles where i now live in brooklyn but the musicians i met in la and in nashville where i've spent a lot of time have been incredibly generous cool collaborative people acting is maybe a little more like mercenary like kind of i don't know but i've been doing it longer the acting so i'm a little more like delighted by the newness of the music do you know what i'm.

[Chelsea Handler]

Saying absolutely understand what you're saying and i have to say i have a couple of friends who are not they're not out as musicians yet they're working on music but they are actors two of them specifically that i'm thinking of and they have the same exact sentiment they're gonna be coming out with music and they're both pretty big stars so like and i had no idea i was like wait what you guys and they're like well that's why cause we have to get it right you know because we're so you know well known in these other arenas i would imagine the pressure is intense to get it right but they said the same thing about nashville and they also surprisingly told me that the music scene in los angeles is far more not adaptable like it's just there's just more going on musically in la than new york which surprised me would you agree with that.

[Josh Radner]

That is true i have found new york i think it's a matter of like the venues are just a little more like active in la so like i started playing music at the hotel cafe which is like an incredibly intimate you know there's two stages the people were so nice i kept getting invited to these like songwriter evenings and i'd get up and do two or three songs and meet people who ended up becoming collaborators it was great yeah that.

[Chelsea Handler]

Is fun first of all it's so nice to not to have to do one thing not that you have to do acting but you know what i mean it's what you were saying earlier i feel very aligned with that i like to do a lot of different things because otherwise i'll get too bored and what i've noticed by doing a lot of things i mean it could be add or however you want to frame it or it could just be like artistic behavior the life of an artist is like you kind of have to spread yourself around a little it's not always one thing i guess unless you're van gogh it was one thing but i'm sure he had other tricks up his sleeve too that we probably don't know about but i would say that and then the artistry kind of bleeds into each other would you say.

[Josh Radner]

That that's for me for me it's kind of like i think about there's just like different ideas need a different form like sometimes i have an idea and i'm like well that's a ninety minute story like that's a movie i have another idea and i'm like that's a four minute song i'm not going to get anything more it's actually better as a song than it would be in a larger kind of you know what i'm saying like a different arena.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well you've written and you've written movies too and you wrote the fleischman's fleischman is in trouble no i didn't write.

[Josh Radner]

That taffy brodus or akner wrote it.

[Chelsea Handler]

I acted in that oh you acted in that sorry i thought you'd created.

[Josh Radner]

That that's very nice of you to think that i'll tell taffy you thought.

[Chelsea Handler]

That yeah let's just keep pretending let's start that rumor for anything i mentioned jaws he also wrote and directed jaws.

[Josh Radner]

I did write jaws i didn't direct jaws i directed close encounters.

[Catherine]

Can you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Imagine i was just i grew up on martha's vineyard like in the summertime so they actually shot that movie when my brothers and sisters were in there like you know kids under ten years old so they watched that shark bruce go up and down in the water in the bay on katama bay and they would not go in the water for ten years after that yeah so what's your story josh you're married do.

[Josh Radner]

You have children now no we have a dog named nelson who's somewhere around.

[Chelsea Handler]

Here that's a good dog's name and i approve of that yeah and are you planning on having children are you anti children i'm not anti are you open minded about it yeah you are yeah okay good to know great just getting to re know you yeah we.

[Josh Radner]

Didn'T cover everything the night we met.

[Chelsea Handler]

We don't i do i mean yes how could we have we were obviously busy yeah we were busy i was i'm sure i was had a serious buzz going are you sober now i'm.

[Josh Radner]

So i'm like california sober meaning only.

[Chelsea Handler]

Weed is that right i like weed.

[Josh Radner]

I like psychedelics i don't i don't drink i haven't had a drink in about seven or eight years but i'm i still like altering the consciousness i just don't do it with booze anymore.

[Chelsea Handler]

You know yeah that seems to be the trend you know i mean i still drink because i have a real affinity for alcohol but i definitely drink a lot less because of all of the other good stuff available now like the healthier stuff like if you're microdosing whether it's psilocybin or lsd or whatever you're into you don't you definitely don't drink as much as i used to.

[Josh Radner]

For sure yeah for me alcohol was just just unleashed some part of me that was not great i also i don't know i have it in my family it just felt like a good move to make but i still like i didn't have an off switch with alcohol i have it with everything else.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah that's interesting yeah yeah there's a lot of people that don't have an off switch with alcohol i was like.

[Josh Radner]

If one is good four is better.

[Chelsea Handler]

You know yeah four is better and then you get that look in your eye that empty vacant look in your eye and you're like it's time to take you home sweetie yeah sometimes you're talking to yourself you do this podcast a watch podcast with how i met yout mother you rewatch episodes together and.

[Josh Radner]

Discuss well yeah it's with one of the co creators of the show craig.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thomas i already told you you've created everything that we're gonna talk about today.

[Josh Radner]

Yeah i've created it all so it's.

[Chelsea Handler]

Cute if you wanna shout out names to other people but we're just gonna edit that from the podcast it's called.

[Josh Radner]

How we made youe mother it started because my wife jordana had never seen the show and she really wanted to watch it and i kind of felt like ready to watch it again i hadn't seen it in so many years so i called craig who's a really dear friend and i love talking to him and i was like do you want to do something a little more formal and just like go through the show and talk about it and you know it's a rewatch and we don't cover it in like granular detail every episode but we really do talk about like the major kind of themes of what was up we talk about what worked still what didn't work what no longer kind of works it's kind of like this meta thing because the whole series was structured as this older guy looking back on his younger years and now we're like older looking back on this thing we made i know that.

[Chelsea Handler]

Show was a lot that was like nine seasons correct yeah so and you were the very first person cast in that show is that accurate that is.

[Josh Radner]

True yeah me and coby smulders were the first yeah but i was the very first person who auditioned on the very first day that is true that's.

[Chelsea Handler]

Wild okay yeah that is wild i mean nine years of your life is such a big chunk of your life.

[Josh Radner]

So big yeah i always thought about it i was like it's high school plus college plus one year plus like a mini phd yeah a gap year or whatever i mean it it was so long and and also it flies by i mean it's so weird like the thing you're describing of like wanting to go from thing to thing that's like a little thing probably we share is like a little bit of a mercurial personality like we want to go from thing to thing and you never think when you get into this industry i'm going to be doing something for nine years like that's insane right right.

[Chelsea Handler]

And also in a in in like the regular world if you were to go into any job i wonder if people want to go into a job thinking i want to be here for nine years you know usually if you're really kind of like my professional friends go to a company and they'll be like oh i'll stay here for five to six years and then i'll move on to something else right but i don't know if that's like a different level of employment you know or if some people are just looking for any stability whatsoever but if you were to go into something knowing it would last that long i wonder if our decisions would be the same well you have.

[Josh Radner]

To i mean when you test for the pilot i think it's still like this you have to sign a seven year contract you know so but statistically that never happens you know right but.

[Chelsea Handler]

And in your case it exceeded the seven years but you're so grateful in that moment when you're signing that fucking you're like please give me seven years of a salary please you never could imagine that you would either grow bored and i'm not saying you did i just speak from my own experience that you would grow bored or experience any sort of ennui or you know like get tired of something you think well.

[Josh Radner]

I was like please give me my health insurance like i was like really wanted something to go and if you look at nine years of your life any nine year chunk you're going to be bored frustrated elated like it's everything you know what i mean like no one wants to hear that you had a bad day on your hit tv show but like of course you do you know right you also have really.

[Chelsea Handler]

Fun days yeah and you had such a great cast i mean everybody in that cast is a solid normal mostly normal person i don't know that depends.

[Josh Radner]

On the day but yeah mostly yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well of course i mean we are dealing with actors but as far as actors go you got a good batch to work with that's for sure yeah i love cobie smulders i love jason segel i love kaylee now it says here that you struggle to separate yourself from the role that you played and that you struggled with fame talk to.

[Josh Radner]

Me about that i wouldn't say i struggled with separating myself from the role i felt like i struggled with other people not willing or wanting to separate me from the role you know what i mean i knew who i was all the time i knew who i you know i knew i was playing a role it's like you know it's such a head trip like so many people and people watch the show over and over there's these people that are i love them but they're obsessed with the show and they watch it over and over so they've spent so much time with me as this one person i filmed this thing i banked it i've moved on with my life and and i've i don't think about that i don't know the show the way they know the show i don't i'm not saturated in it the way they are so when they meet me it's almost like i offend them by having another life and another name and another you know what i mean yeah i.

[Catherine]

Will say of anyone we've ever had on the show i think you have the most thriving like reddit life like you know what i mean like people are out there like still having conversations about the show oh yeah a lot.

[Josh Radner]

Yeah no it's crazy it's wild and i was just on jesse tyler ferguson's podcast we were just talking about because he was on modern family for so long and we were talking about the weirdness of people wanting you to be that character and interpreting everything you say and do through the lens of the character so it was strange i mean i think there was one level it was that and the other level was just the erosion of anonymity and it was weird i just found it very destabilizing i'm used to it now like i know how to walk through an airport and take a few photos of people and move on with my day it's not like it's not a huge deal but like at the time i was really unsettled by it yeah i.

[Chelsea Handler]

Would imagine that's true for a lot of actors for me i'm like you know i am kind of what i am on tv so it's a different i'm not playing a character right you know my persona is who i am pretty much you know luckily it's even better i mean hopefully it's even better in person but i don't struggle with that so i'm always curious to hear actors talk about that because it would be really fucking annoying for people to expect you to character in the middle of the day on a street in los angeles that's really annoying yeah yeah.

[Josh Radner]

I had a i had a girlfriend years ago who said man you're a lot nicer when people come up and say your real name and want to talk about one of the movies you directed you know like i just had this weird but i've really i've made peace so much with it and part of it the rewatching of the show has brought me some peace where i'm i i remember watching these episodes you know twenty years ago and i was so hard on myself but now i watch it and i'm like you were young you were also doing a really good job in a really hard role like i have a lot more compassion for myself at this age looking back on it i also have a lot more understanding of why people love the show in some weird way like i couldn't understand why people are so obsessed with it i mean i was like it's good but why have you dedicated your life to it like why is it a religion but now i get that like it really teaches people something about those years like those twenty five to thirty five which are really pivotal interesting times in people's lives you know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right we're talking about the show how i met yout mother and then we're talking about josh's podcast which is how we made your mother it sounds like you've also done a lot of self reflection and like probably therapy i'm assuming correct sure yeah from everything i'm you know was reading about you in preparation for this interview it sounds like you have a a lot of like stuff you want to get out you know especially with the music it's nice to have the freedom to be able to direct to be able to act to be able to sing like these guitar ballads that are on your album that i was reading some of the lyrics of and it's really just a testament to the creative spirit i think when you really could do all of these things aptly and want and have the desire to keep doing it and keep.

[Josh Radner]

Producing things yeah yeah thanks i mean i you know when i was in drama school like i just wanted to do an episode of law and order and then you do that and you're like oh wait maybe i could actually be on one of these shows for a while or maybe i could be on broadway and you know it's hard because the carrot keeps moving but at the same time when you do one thing it kind of like uncorks this thing of like oh what if i tried that or what if i tried that and i started writing songs with my friend ben lee who's a great australian songwriter so i kind of apprenticed with this great songwriter like i took it very seriously as a craft you know i was i didn't like go in with a producer and be like here's three lines make a song like i really tried to get under the hood of how songs are made and it's just been it's been so satisfying.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh that's so nice to hear where do you think you find your like happiest version of yourself i feel like.

[Josh Radner]

When i have my hooks in a song or like a script and there's like just like a good writing day is like truly the most satisfying thing for me when i'm when you catch the wave you know and it's not like i mean i don't mind like chiseling away at something but like when you catch a wave there's kind of a thing of like the afternoon walk with my dog and then writing a song and my wife is a psychologist like waiting for her to come down from the office and get dinner in our sweet little neighborhood like like like pleasures are like small these days but and i mean like cosmically big but small in in the grand scheme of things and i really liked the last year and a half we've been married has just felt very sweet that's sweet.

[Chelsea Handler]

I love to hear a straight man talk like this now what is your so your wife's a psychologist how does that play out in your marriage it's.

[Josh Radner]

Good because i'm pretty psychologically minded you know and i can speak that language and she really loves stories and television and movies and she has no desire to be in front of but her story instincts are unbelievably good like she always knows what's about to happen in something she's always a little bit ahead of things and when she reads things i really trust her eye and her ear like she's a great shadow collaborator.

[Chelsea Handler]

In certain ways i just read this term called proleptic irony do you know what that is no when the audience knows it's just what you're describing about your wife when the audience knows something's gonna happen in a movie or a book before the characters do oh yeah so as the reader or as the viewer it's called proleptic irony and then there's another part of there's another form of irony which is not as relevant to this conversation but i thought that was such a good thing that there was a term for that i like knowing that thanks yeah yeah yeah exactly does she psychoanalyze you ever or is she just too tired from working that.

[Josh Radner]

She doesn't have time for that legitimately she is too tired she doesn't we don't really do that i mean it's more of like do you want like what was that i heard a great thing that was like when someone comes to you and they're all worked up you say do you want a toolbox a tissue box or a soapbox so it's like the soapbox is like you just want to vent the toolbox is do you want some help working through this and the tissue box is like do you just want to release it and let it go and i think we're pretty good like i've had enough relationships where i'm like i don't do the fucking thing i mean sometimes you you fall into it but like i don't get in there and try to fix it you know but a lot of times she's so she's seen you know six or seven patients in a day and she's like and on zoom right and she is that is closed for business right so then we're just figuring out where to go to dinner.

[Chelsea Handler]

You know yeah that's nice it's nice to figure out where to go to dinner in new york city i love.

[Josh Radner]

That we're in fort green which has some of the best restaurants in new york and we went to italy on our honeymoon and we were like i mean it's good but like it genuinely you get spoiled in new york it's.

[Chelsea Handler]

Not as good as new york i.

[Josh Radner]

Mean some of it is yeah you sorry italy we had a great time.

[Chelsea Handler]

Though i know i think you're right though like it's kind of like mexico you go to like i was in like i go when i was in mexico city i was so excited about all the food and i was like this is not what i envisioned at all and i'm like i feel like we might have better mexican food in.

[Josh Radner]

Los angeles yeah it's almost like do you remember that movie john carter it was like it was basically like a novel that george lucas plundered for all this inspiration for star wars and then they made a john carter movie and then everyone's like it's like a star wars ripoff and it's like no that was the original thing that george lucas loved and i feel like italian food or mexican food is probably like that where it's like that's the og thing but we like took it and made it something else exactly so now it's.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like that's what we've acclimated to and we're like we think that's right exactly exactly same thing with pizza you know there's that famous pizzeria in rome did you go to rome on your honeymoon.

[Josh Radner]

No well we flew through we were.

[Chelsea Handler]

Up in the north it's like called the cemetery or something it's everyone goes there and i went there and i was like this is really disappointing meanwhile you know you can't say anything cause you're like fuck i don't even want to sound like an idiot but i do not like this if i lived in new york i would just be twice the size of myself every night before i go to bed in new york city i have to have a piece of pizza yeah and i hope i hope if i lived there i wouldn't act like that because i do want to live in new york city one day i just have to wait for my hell that is los angeles house to be done being built which i bitch about on this podcast all the time so there's no reason you shouldn't be privy to it as well.

[Josh Radner]

Josh that's fine but also in new york you end up eating at like ten o' clock like a full dinner at ten o' clock and la you're just it's a whole different i would.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like to be up at ten o' clock you know what i mean yeah and that new york would even provide me that la is sleepyville now la.

[Josh Radner]

Makes you very elderly very quickly you're like five thirty dinner you're asleep at eight you know what i mean like.

[Chelsea Handler]

I said i have to move to new york soon because otherwise i will be too like at least it's motivating you're always going out and there's too much happening around to not participate in some of the action in new york i was just telling my friend i'm like i'm gonna have to move to new york otherwise i'll die in like five or ten years because all i do when i'm in la is sleep i know i honestly went to bed last night at like eight forty five i was like i took it edible and i was like oh fuck it yeah you know like what am i watching nothing important right now i just.

[Josh Radner]

Sold my house in l a like i'm fully living in new york i like i just closed on it like three weeks ago could you have sold.

[Chelsea Handler]

My house with your house as like.

[Josh Radner]

A little couplet where are you staying.

[Chelsea Handler]

In the meantime i'm staying currently with my friend kat thank you kat she's put up with me we're like basically turning into a lesbian couple she cooks she's a busy career woman she takes such good care of me i bring nothing to the table in terms of domesticity i am as useless or as useful i should say as an ashtray on a motorcycle when it comes to domesticity but i provide personality and i like to finance things so that's what i'm good for you know you have to find your strengths in this world and those are mine josh those are mine on that note we're going to take a break and we'll be right back with josh radner for the first time ever there has been a truly beautiful medical breakthrough one shot makes you hot but with terrifying consequences in the new original series fx's the beauty the glamorous world of supermodels turns deadly as mysterious deaths draw in fbi agents and a shadowy billionaire who will stop at nothing to protect his empire from executive producer ryan murphy fx's the beauty now streaming on hulu and hulu on disney for bundle subscribers or lost i'm gonna pull over and ask that man for.

[T-Mobile Directions Speaker]

Directions hi there we're looking to get to the campground well you're gonna take a left at the old oak tree end of this here road no i'm just kidding let me get my phone.

[Chelsea Handler]

Out how are you getting a signal.

[T-Mobile Directions Speaker]

Out here t mobile and us cellular decided to merge so the network out here is huge we're getting the same great signal as the city and saving a boatload with all the benefits oh and a five year price guarantee okay here's those directions actually can you point.

[Chelsea Handler]

Us in the direction of a t.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

Mobile store america's best network just got bigger switch to t mobile today and get built in benefits the other guys leave out plus our five year price guarantee and now t mobile is available in us cellular stores.

[T-Mobile Announcer 2]

Best mobile network based on analysis by oogle of speed test intelligence data two h twenty twenty five bigger network the combination of t mobile's internet us cellular network footprints will enhance the t mobile network's coverage price guarantee on talk text and data exclusions like taxes and fees apply see t mobile dot com for details these days.

[Okta Announcer]

It seems like ai agents are just about everywhere you turn every field and every function but without identity you can't trust they'll serve your business instead of jeopardizing it fortunately okta helps you get identity right by securing your ai agents identities giving you a single layer of control a single standard of trust so whether an ai agent supports a single user or your entire enterprise with okta you'll turn risk into opportunity secure every agent secure any agent okta secures ai.

[Public Investing Announcer]

Support for the show comes from public the investing platform for those who take it seriously on public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks bonds options crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with ai it all starts with your prompt from renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over twenty percent year over year you can literally type any prompt and put the ai to work it screens thousands of stocks builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the s and p five hundred then you can invest in a few clicks generated assets are like etf's with infinite possibilities completely customizable and based on your thesis not someone else's go to public dot com public podcast and earn an uncapped one percent bonus when you transfer your portfolio that's public dot com podcast paid for by public investing brokerage services by open to the public investing inc member finra and sipc advisory services by public advisors llc sec registered advisor generated assets is an interactive analysis tool output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice complete disclosures available at public dot com disclosures.

[Catherine]

And.

[Chelsea Handler]

We'Re back with josh radner he has a new album out called eulogy volume two and everything's just under your name you don't have a band's name no.

[Josh Radner]

Just my name yeah josh are you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Ready to take some questions from some callers we dole out advice here like.

[Josh Radner]

Professionals oh wow i didn't know this okay yeah i'm up for it surprise.

[Chelsea Handler]

You'Re gonna love it everyone loves it.

[Catherine]

Yes well our first question is just an email this comes from nikki she says dear chelsea i'm writing because i'm struggling with a situation in my marriage and could really use some outside perspective.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh perfect we have a married man here right exactly and a married woman.

[Catherine]

Yeah exactly my husband and i have been married for ten months eight months ago we moved across the country for his job which meant i had to leave all my friends and family behind we're still adjusting to the new city and he now travels frequently for work a few weeks ago i went to visit friends and while i was gone my husband went out to a bar i had this nagging feeling and knew something was off when i got back so i ended up going through his phone i know i know not proud of this what i found was that he had texted a girl he met at the bar around two am he had apparently left and he was asking her to come back out to the bar offering to pay for her uber it didn't seem to go beyond texting but the fact that he was actively pursuing another woman while i was visiting friends the friends i had to leave behind because of his career feels like such a betrayal totally when i confronted him he apologized and seemed genuinely sorry but i can't shake the feeling that he's getting more comfortable seeking attention from other women the combination of frequent travel us being apart often and now this incident has my trust at an all time low here's what i'm struggling with i hate that i felt compelled to go through his phone but my gut instinct was right now i'm worried he'll just get better at hiding things i also feel especially vulnerable because i'm isolated in this new city without my support system and it feels like he took advantage of that the moment i left town we're planning to have a serious conversation about this and i'm considering couples therapy but i'm not sure if i'm overreacting or if this is as big of a red flag as it feels how do i know if this is something we can work through or if i'm just setting myself up to be a detective in my own marriage and how do i deal with the fact that i moved my entire life for someone who might not be as committed to our marriage as i thought thanks nikki that's a lot wow i would.

[Chelsea Handler]

Say that's a big big red flag and really unfortunate first of all i'm so sorry nikki that you're dealing with that but i'm of the belief that when something like that happens it has to become such a big deal to make the first time the last time like you have to get into counseling right away with somebody with a therapist to understand why he would even allow himself to get to that place to be drunkenly texting somebody at two o' clock in the morning is so disrespectful so unacceptable you're ten months into your marriage that is a huge red flag that he's doing that yeah and while i wouldn't say like oh god you gotta divorce him you have to immediately draw attention to the matter there have to be consequences to those kinds of actions i don't care about anyone going through anyone's phone i mean it's not ideal but if somebody does and they find something it's usually because of female instinct and you want to like you're not pouring through your husband's phone all day long but now that she saw that she's going to do it again.

[Catherine]

It'S woman's intuition like we kind of always know and i do agree with you i think that this is something that they can work through but like get into therapy immediately and this is not gonna be two sessions he's obviously having some peter pan stuff about like oh god i'm married now i still wanna sow my wild oats but like i do think if he's committed to getting past that you guys can get.

[Chelsea Handler]

Past it right what do you think josh from the male perspective well i.

[Josh Radner]

Think first of all it's like a pretty insightful letter like she has some real self awareness and i think that that is terrific i hope her husband has similar kind of self awareness he might be in a fog of like you said like peter pan like i understand all that it's like women have their own version of this but i think men sometimes marriage can feel like the end of like hanging up some aspect of yourself that was like that's very energizing and fun and exciting but in a good relationship all that stuff can come out to play and still be active but i think you're right it's like it's no good i mean it's almost like live your life in such a way that no one needs to go through your phone like that's a good way to be you know like you you want to feel like your public face and your private face are the same especially in your marriage i mean if i was like keeping massive secrets from my wife i would find this marriage really hard to be in so yes i feel like you gotta you gotta establish guidelines where it's like we're transparent with each other with where the behavior doesn't you don't have these side behaviors because you're obviously trying to escape something that's a bigger issue which is why couples therapy is inevitable.

[Chelsea Handler]

For these right couples therapy and then individual therapy for him too because it's also really so unfair to put your partner through that to know that she has a job that takes her out of town and now every time she goes out of town this is what's gonna be on her mind instead of her being able to focus on her job and be you know the best person in her career that she can be and all of the goals that she wants to attain or reach or aspire to whatever like you're putting an onus on her now to actually have to be preoccupied with your childish behavior and because you're drunk at two o' clock in the morning and that puts.

[Josh Radner]

Her in like the mother role and him in the child role which is very unsexy i would say that her larger question am i overreacting i would.

[Chelsea Handler]

Say no yes correct right we all agree that you're not overreacting and you.

[Catherine]

Know i think people don't talk enough about how hard that first year of marriage can be i know in my life like we went through probably like two years of therapy about a year in we started going to therapy and like i just didn't know what i didn't know you know it really helped it's why i'm still married twenty years.

[Chelsea Handler]

Later fifteen years later what like and what were some of the like the challenges of being married in your first.

[Catherine]

Year well it's a big adjustment like even people i found friends of mine who are like well we've been living together forever so it's not gonna change anything but i think it's an expectation shift where people are like oh they're gonna come home at a certain time or we're gonna like you know no one's gonna stay up watching tv we're gonna go to bed together whatever like little how annoying there's a lot honestly.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean having to go to bed together every night i mean opt out of that i think any healthy couple doesn't do that every single night no correct obviously you can't i mean that's.

[Josh Radner]

I have some friends who've been married a long time and they maintain that as well their secret is they go to bed at the same time that.

[Chelsea Handler]

They go to bed together every single night at the same time yeah oh wow wow interesting i have to think about that on my drive home i'm not so sure about that i will.

[Catherine]

Also say i think one of the big keys for us was like you know they say never go to bed angry for us it was like go to bed angry because you like maybe have had a couple drinks and even if not you're tired you're grumpy you're circling the same drain over and over and over like go to bed you wake up and you're like what were.

[Chelsea Handler]

We figuring out it's like holding off on sending that email at night an.

[Josh Radner]

Angry email that's the most like common somewhat dumbest marital advice everyone says it and you're like no think about that go to bed angry sometimes and wake up and be in a better place.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah but also who fucking came up with that that we have these like it's one of those axioms of life like don't go to bed angry it's like almost like something that you know any idiot could have said and then everyone's like yeah just repeat that rinse cycle and repeat yeah do you have any rules that you and your wife follow about maintaining i mean you obviously seem very well balanced josh in that you know well it's been a hard.

[Josh Radner]

One it hasn't always been that way my wife had she said i only have two rules which i thought were incredibly sensible one was be kind which i think is great and the other one was she said don't read my journals she's kept journals like for years and years and years and she's you know and she has a friend that in the event of her untimely death her one job is to come to the apartment and get all the journals and burn them like she's very sincere about like no one is to see these these are just for me which.

[Chelsea Handler]

Only would pique my interest more yeah.

[Josh Radner]

No it hasn't i honor it but.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah i mean that's talk about a betrayal reading somebody's journals terrible terrible i can't even believe people still write with their hands i had this i had this i got that new gratitude journal and i was like okay i want to do it in the morning and at night every night and then my friend's like oh you could do it on your you know you could download the app and do it on your phone i'm like i could type i'm like i could only get through you know when you're writing now it's like so hard to write for some reason what are you doing i know and i can't fit all the words it's like my handwriting sucks now and i'm like if i type it i get so much more in then i want to list ten things instead of three things you know that made today great et cetera so yeah i'm all about the phones now i've given up we're living through the technology age and now we're living through the artificial insemination and intelligence age don't remind us do things i don't want anything to do with i don't want to deal with ai.

[Catherine]

Well our next email comes from allie she is calling in so she says my name's allie i'm thirty two and my brother thirty one is my best friend don't worry i have other friends like a healthy number but for a lot of reasons including complex family dynamics our shared dark sense of humor and the bond we formed caring for our grandma during her dementia years he's been the most important relationship in my life for a long time here's where it gets tricky in the past year he's entered a serious relationship i've known this girlfriend for years and i think she's lovely this isn't one of those i hate my brother's girlfriend situations sounds like it's going to be though but something about it just isn't fully clicking for me emotionally it's not jealousy and it's not drama it's just change and apparently i'm not thriving in it we live next door to each other because of course we do and i'm realizing i've built a little too much of my identity around this brother bestie dynamic most of my other close friends are getting married having babies or moving on to new life phases and while i'm good with my own path i think i need more tools to invest in me again so how do i begin to lovingly create space between me and my brother who is again still my favorite person without feeling like i'm pushing him away i don't want to be weird or dramatic i just want some practical emotionally intelligent action items for carving out a little independent without breaking the bond.

[Chelsea Handler]

Allie hi ali this is our special guest today josh radner hi hi nice to meet you that's so sweet that you're best friends with your brother i love that that's really nice i understand that you're dealing with change but you know what listen this is not like everyone has problems with change i mean not everybody but so many people have problems with change and have problems with making adjustments and actually you know having somebody else come in even if your best friend wasn't your brother it would probably be hard for you for your best friend to have a relationship and being introduced to them so give yourself a little bit of grace and i would just whatever you're into just like exercise more of those activities like literally like if you're in a pilates make sure that you're allotting time for that make sure you're allotting time for your friends you have friends i'm assuming i.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Have a lot of friends i go.

[Chelsea Handler]

To pilates every day perfect i do.

[Josh Radner]

Pottery you intuited that chelsea amazing and.

[Chelsea Handler]

You have hobbies you like pottery it's.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

More like like i said i like love his girlfriend i think she's fantastic i just realized like when he got into the relationship that my identity was like more closely tied and like right now it's fantastic and amazing everybody's out.

[Chelsea Handler]

Here there's like a lot going on.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

But in the off season there's not a lot going on you know it's like small town you know everyone it's very condensed and like everyone's in each.

[Chelsea Handler]

Other'S business and do you feel like during those winter months when it is a quieter that you are encroaching on their private life like because i don't think your identity is tied to your brother unless you actively like your brother and sister that's not gonna change yeah.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

We'Re very much in like the same like social circle too and i just like i felt like oh my god like i don't need to be like like third wheeling with his girlfriend all.

[Chelsea Handler]

The time like it was just like.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

I i just want to be like chill and cool and like i don't know i don't know it's a it's like i don't i don't know if there's like a correct answer or like.

[Chelsea Handler]

Even like a piece of it can.

[Josh Radner]

I offer something ali perhaps like my wife has this theory that like if we're a solar system like and you're the sun your brother was like mercury but he might have to be venus like he might have to like go like one planet away you know where it's like you're still in relationship you're still in the same solar system and i think when people partner off dynamics have to change because the primary relationship is like the relationship yeah you know.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Totally i love that analogy isn't that.

[Josh Radner]

Cool i think there's like a really cool opportunity for you to like what chelsea said like lean into other stuff grow other parts of yourself and also grow other friendships and you know just follow the seeds and then i think your relationship with your brother will like take its new place in the solar system and it'll start to feel right but you're just in the like adjustment change period which is yeah it's like.

[Chelsea Handler]

A meteor like around yeah you're like in the liminal phase that's what that is right where you're kind of in between two things but also just you know like in thinking about it in thoughts like towards your brother towards his girlfriend how long have they been together like over a year okay just i would say like lead with your heart and lead with love like don't overthink things too much don't think oh my god am i spending too much time here like you can have those thoughts but don't overanalyze your relationship because it is your brother you do have a relationship it sounds like you have a pretty healthy relationship with his girlfriend you know that you're gonna like try and grow these other parts as josh said very eloquently grow these other parts of yourself but also just lead with love like don't punish anyone for these circumstances and don't make it like you know oh i'm not gonna be available to them because i don't want them to think i'm too available like i have my own life like don't play games like that just lead with your heart and really try and be as present as possible when you're with both of them because like what josh said i want to echo like there is a new version of this coming around and it's in these in between stages that get so sticky i think for all of us when we don't know where what you know what we knew is not exactly right anymore and what's to come isn't exactly happening yet so we kind of get stuck and it's actually a really nice phase for you to really get in touch with yourself and really be present in the relationship and show up like heart forward love first and totally with no judgment towards yourself or them yeah okay to practice that yeah okay well thanks for calling in i love that question and i love josh's answer and i feel like yeah good good good luck with everything thank.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

You and good luck with whatever you're promoting josh can't wait to listen to the episode and hear he's got a.

[Chelsea Handler]

New album out he's got a new album out you can download yes oh fun on spotify right now or download on itunes whatever it's called eulogy volume two by josh radner you could download it anywhere yeah okay amazing well thank you awesome thanks allie your new album is going to get her into her venus dynamic with her brother she's going to end up sleeping with her brother watch this podcast leads to well our.

[Catherine]

Last question today comes from stephanie and she is forty eight she says dear chelsea i recently started working for a small ish local business my friend connected me with the owner and we instantly had a connection even before we met in person once we met in person it was even more intoxicating nothing inappropriate has happened but over the last five months i have just crushed so hard it goes in waves where he i think flirts with me and then stops we really get along and just mesh i think constantly that i just want to make out with him it's to the point where we're passing friendly work appropriate touches we text each other randomly almost just to let the other know the other one know we're thinking about each other without actually saying it i've never in my life been this drawn to someone so magnetically he even gave me a plant if that wasn't a sign i don't know what is i mean a love fern who does that i don't want to get fired i don't think he would but i also don't want to quit because i love how can i just make out with.

[Chelsea Handler]

Him just do it already what hello hi stephanie this is our special guest today josh radner say hello to him hi hi josh hi look you look like you're like having an affair sitting there like you act like you're doing something terribly wrong what kind of work do you do that this is so i mean honestly i feel like work romances are just you know unless there's some huge power dynamic there's really nothing wrong with the them so i am.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

An operations director for a small ish company but i work very closely with.

[Josh Radner]

The owner and can i ask though the owner he's not married he's single.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Yeah he is single he's divorced okay.

[Chelsea Handler]

So he's still single yes okay so i think you need to make your move sister like five months what are.

[Catherine]

You doing he can't make the move.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right he can't make the move he's the right so you're gonna have to let him know how you feel and also give him an exit in case he doesn't have the same feelings but you gotta do it you're a woman you have to be brave and be a woman what if this is the.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Love of your life i know and honestly so i had told catherine that i am divorced i've been divorced for eight years and never during this eight years have i found interest and not one person and so my friends are just like oh my god like of all people of course you're like in love with your boss like why is this happening but i'm just not brave and i guess i need like more reassurance i'm worried that our dynamic will change if for some reason it didn't work out or i also don't want to be rejected i don't know but.

[Chelsea Handler]

You got to get rid of the rejection part that's part of life and if you don't want to be rejected then you then then you almost don't deserve to be in love because you have to experience rejection that's just the way it goes you can't be afraid of it it doesn't make you less of a woman it doesn't make you less of a person it doesn't make you less valuable it just means that that person and you aren't a perfect match that's okay you're not gonna be a perfect match with most people that.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

You meet yeah no that's true can.

[Chelsea Handler]

You do something cute like slip him an email or slip a little note on his desk ask him to meet for a drink like is there something that you feel more comfortable doing in order to just get the message across like hey do you want to meet for a drink later tonight i think there you'll get an answer to that real quick that'll give you an indication.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Also so he stopped drinking and so that was one thing that we would we would go do we would go out for drinks or like one time i was telling him how i love a martini but i wanted to try the specific martini well then all of a sudden he brought all this stuff to make that but like now he's not drinking which is fine but that kind of just changes the dynamic a little bit and so that makes it harder because i'm always like let's just have a drink but then also i'm like okay you're on your sober journey.

[Catherine]

So can i ask josh here so you you've been on a sober journey for a long time like what's the dynamic of like asking somebody to go for a drink and you go somewhere that has five mocktails to choose from.

[Josh Radner]

Yeah i i just get a bitters and soda or a club soda like i like being in bars i don't mind being in bars at all you know i think like in terms of being bold something like hey i really like our dynamic i really like the notes and the you know whatever you guys are doing and say i don't want that to change i was just wondering like if we could maybe work in like a little bit of making out and just see what that's like.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

That'S all i want to do and i just want to make out with him yeah and then we'll go from there just like let me just make out with you one time and then maybe he hates it maybe i hate it and then problem solved right but.

[Josh Radner]

I think also there's a trick in creative writing where they're like i don't know how to start this story and they're like well tell me the story and then you tell them the story and you're like that's it that's how you tell the story like that's how you write the story so everything you said in the letter is like i really like this guy really like our dynamic i just would really like to make out with him but i don't know how to broach it i think that's what you say i love it.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Yeah because all my guy friends are like he's giving you so much and you're not responding to like the thing like if he says something to me like today he was like i'm wearing my favorite jeans that they're vintage levi's that i loved finding and he's like i like your i like your jeans and i'm just like it's like it's clear he's flirting with me but i'm like oh thank you like i don't i'm just but just you just need.

[Chelsea Handler]

To go for it go for it what's the worst thing that could happen he could say he's not interested it sounds like he is interested yes and it sounds like he's not in a position to make a move on you because he is the owner of the business so think about those two things and send him a cute note send him what josh said send him something like i know you stopped drinking any chance you want to come and watch me have a drink you could say anything cute that's gonna be that's that even if it gets rejected which is also a step towards getting closer to your goals i believe even if this guy rejects you i know you haven't been attracted to anyone in eight years you will be again you will be hopefully this is the guy but in case it you know like you have to be you gotta you're stronger than that that's silly you know what i mean like rejection is whatever and there's a lot of flirting going on so there's like proof in the pudding and you need to capitalize on this moment because what if someone else comes along and is willing to capitalize on the moment like you gotta jump in there.

[Josh Radner]

But also like rejection is good information cause you can move on with your life like it's good to know and also it's win win the rejection i think what chelsea's saying is right yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah so we're gonna need you to do something and report back to us okay i will for sure okay we're gonna give you one week and then you have to call katherine and let her know what happened no i'm serious.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Yes leaving for germany tomorrow so he'll be gone for twelve days perfect then.

[Catherine]

Today seems like a perfect time to.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do that actually today does sound like a good day because that would be.

[Caller (Allie or Stephanie)]

Great for him he did ask me how late can you stay at work and i was like all night stephanie.

[Chelsea Handler]

He likes you yes stephanie wake up and smell the cappuccino go be bald it's very exciting that he's leaving for germany you could leave him with a nice makeup session right before he goes to germany and he's going to be thinking about you the whole time ding ding ding this is your moment okay.

[Josh Radner]

You got this okay we believe in.

[Catherine]

You all right go stephanie go go.

[Chelsea Handler]

Stephanie go bye thanks so much bye okay we're going to take a break and we're going to come back and wrap up with josh radner for the first time ever there has been a truly beautiful medical breakthrough one shot makes you hot but with terrifying consequences in the new original series fx's the beauty the glamorous world of supermodels turns deadly as mysterious deaths draw in fbi agents and a shadowy billionaire who will stop at nothing to protect his empire from executive producer ryan murphy fx's the beauty now streaming on hulu and hulu on disney for bundle subscribers we're lost i'm gonna pull over and ask that man for directions hi there we're looking to.

[T-Mobile Directions Speaker]

Get to the campground well you're gonna take a left at the old oak tree end of this here road no i'm just kidding let me get my.

[Chelsea Handler]

Phone out how are you getting a.

[T-Mobile Directions Speaker]

Signal out here t mobile and us cellular decided to merge so the network out here is huge we're getting the same great signal as the city and saving a boatload with all the benefits oh and a five year price guarantee okay here's the those directions actually can.

[Chelsea Handler]

You point us in the direction of.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

A t mobile store america's best network just got bigger switch to t mobile today and get built in benefits the other guys leave out plus our five year price guarantee and now t mobile is available in us cellular stores.

[T-Mobile Announcer 2]

Best mobile network based on analysis by ogle of speed test intelligence data two h twenty twenty five bigger network the combination of t mobiles and us cellular network footprints will enhance the t mobile network's coverage price guarantee on talk text and data exclusions like taxes and fees apply see t mobile dot com for details.

[Okta Announcer]

These days it seems like ai agents are just about everywhere you turn every field and every function but without identity you can't trust they'll serve your business instead of jeopardizing it fortunately okta helps you get identity right by securing your ai agents identities giving you a single layer of control a single standard of trust so whether an ai agent supports a single user or your entire enterprise with okta you'll turn risk into opportunity secure every agent secure any agent okta.

[Public Investing Announcer]

Secures ai support for the show comes from public the investing platform for those who take it seriously on public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks bonds options crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with a ai it all starts with your prompt from renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over twenty percent year over year you can literally type any prompt and put the ai to work it screens thousands of stocks builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the s and p five hundred then you can invest in a few clicks generated assets are like etf's with infinite possibilities completely customizable and based on your thesis not someone else's go to public dot com podcast and earn an uncapped one percent bonus when you transfer your portfolio that's public dot com podcast paid for by public investing brokerage services by open to the public investing inc member finra and sipc advisory services by public advisors llc sec registered advisor generated assets is an interactive analysis tool output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice complete disclosures available at public dot com disclosures.

[Chelsea Handler]

And we're back with josh radner who has a new album called eulogy volume two where can you download it.

[Josh Radner]

Josh anywhere you can download it any.

[Chelsea Handler]

Music i think music it's like a podcast guys you can download it anywhere you get your music he also has a podcast he's the host of the podcast how we made youe mother and he's as charming as possible so now i know why we made out and didn't have sex josh actually because you are charming and yeah and you that was the right move i don't think.

[Josh Radner]

If we'd had sex i'd be on your podcast twenty years later i think i was you'd be surprised i was.

[Chelsea Handler]

Seeing oh really yeah you would be i feel like we've had somebody that i didn't clock that i and then after i was like wait a second but anyway josh thank you so much for being here today it was great.

[Josh Radner]

To be with you guys yeah always nice to see you and thanks for.

[Chelsea Handler]

Having me yeah absolutely have a great day okay bye bye bye bye thanks okay guys the high and mighty tour is about to begin i'm in dc february thirteenth february fourteenth atlantic city which i just added fifteenth is norfolk virginia february nineteenth madison wisconsin february twentieth is milwaukee wisconsin february twenty first detroit michigan february twenty second ramah ontario that's canada for those of you who don't speak canadian march thirteenth cleveland ohio march fourteenth columbus ohio march fifteenth cincinnati ohio and then march twentieth is denver colorado march twenty seventh portland maine march twenty eighth providence rhode island march twenty ninth springfield massachusetts april tenth is chicago i'll be at the chicago theater april eleventh indianapolis indiana april twelfth louisville kentucky april sixteenth is albuquerque new mexico april seventeenth is mesa arizona april twenty third is kansas city missouri april twenty fourth is saint louis missouri april twenty fifth is minneapolis minnesota april thirtieth nashville tennessee may first is charlotte north carolina may second is durham north carolina may sixth i'm doing netflix as a joke festival i will be in los angeles that is a new announcement and may fifteenth saratoga california may sixteenth monterey california may seventeenth modesto california and then june fourth portchester new york june fifth is boston mass and june twelfth is portland oregon and then seattle is june thirteenth so suck on that everybody go to chelseahandler dot com.

[Catherine]

For tickets do you want advice from chelsea write in to dearchelsea podcastmail dot com find full video episodes of dear chelsea on youtube by searching earchelseapod dear chelsea is edited and engineered by brad dickert executive producer kathryn law and be sure to check out our merch at chelsea handler dot com.

[Chelsea Handler]

If you're looking for a wine that's not just delicious but also a total crowd pleaser let me introduce you to josh sellars this california wine brand has over a dozen award winning wines from crisp sauvignon blancs to velvety merlots josh sellars has the perfect wine for every occasion serving up a juicy steak at your next barbecue their cabernet sauvignon is the perfect pairing unwinding with friends after a long week you can't go wrong with their pinot grigio with so many delicious wines to choose from josh sellers has something for everyone josh sellers is a proud sponsor of dear chelsea visit www dot joshcellars dot com chelsea and join the wine club to get twenty percent off please.

[Okta Announcer]

Drink responsibly these days it seems like ai agents are just about everywhere you turn every field and every function but without identity you can't trust they'll serve your business instead of jeopardizing it fortunately okta helps you get identity rights by securing your ai agents identities giving you a single layer of control a single standard of trust so whether an ai agent supports a single user or your entire enterprise with okta you'll turn risk into opportunity secure every agent secure any agent okta secures ai everyone deserves to.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

Be connected that's why t mobile and us cellular are joining forces switch to t mobile and save up to twenty percent versus verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out check the math at t mobile dot com switch and now t mobile is in us cellular.

[T-Mobile Announcer 2]

Stores savings versus comparable verizon plans plus the cost of optional benefits plan features in texas and fees vary savings with three plus lines include third line free via monthly bill credits credit stop if you cancel any lines qualifying credit required.

[Bowen Yang]

This is bowen yang from lost culture research with matt rogers and bowen yang we all know the feeling when life gets really busy taking care of yourself can feel impossible that's why premier protein shakes are my go to they have thirty grams of protein one hundred and sixty calories no added sugar and they taste amazing so they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make it's not just for fitness it's for getting afterlife premier protein powers me to say yes to more find your favorite flavor at premierprotein dot com that's p r e m i e r protein com this.

[Chelsea Handler]

Is an iheart podcast guaranteed human.