Men Found Useless with Cody Rigsby

Summary

Podcast Summary: Dear Chelsea – "Men Found Useless with Cody Rigsby"

Episode Information

• Title: Men Found Useless with Cody Rigsby
• Host: Chelsea Handler
• Guest: Cody Rigsby
• Release Date: February 6, 2025

---

Introduction and Guest Introduction

In this episode of Dear Chelsea, host Chelsea Handler welcomes renowned Peloton instructor and multi-talented personality Cody Rigsby as the special guest. The episode delves into personal anecdotes, professional ventures, and insightful discussions on relationships and personal growth.

Key Topics Discussed

1. Chelsea's New Ventures

   • Owls Brew Partnership: Chelsea shares her excitement about partnering with Owls Brew, a boozy lemonade brand founded by women. She introduces "Chelsea Handler's Vodka Lemonade," available in classic yellow, pink, and mint flavors, emphasizing the smooth, non-carbonated options at only 100 calories per can ([02:00]).
   • Upcoming Book: Chelsea promotes her forthcoming book set to release on her 50th birthday, encouraging listeners to pre-order and join her in celebrating this milestone ([02:00]).

2. Cody Rigsby's Personal Life and Career

   • Pregnancy Announcement: Cody humorously reveals his impending pregnancy, sparking a lighthearted discussion about the possibilities of men carrying babies in the future ([05:45]).
   • Peloton Journey: Cody reflects on his decade-long tenure with Peloton, describing it as a life-changing experience that allowed him to inspire others while embracing his identity as a "silly gay boy on a bike" ([07:00]).
   • Podcast Launch: Cody introduces his podcast, Tactful Pettiness, co-hosted with Andrew Chappelle, focusing on cultural moments and relationship topics, available on Apple and Spotify ([14:27]).

3. Relocation and Personal Experiences

   • Moving to North Carolina: The discussion touches on Cody's move from Los Angeles to North Carolina at age eight, highlighting the challenges of adjusting to a new environment fraught with homophobia and racism ([10:02]).
   • Relationship Dynamics: Cody opens up about his recent breakup after a six-year relationship, exploring themes from the book Attached to understand attachment styles and the complexities of monogamy versus ethical non-monogamy ([12:01]).

4. Listener Q&A Sessions

   • Infidelity Among Friends: Sherry Shepherd poses an ethical dilemma regarding two couples experiencing a decades-long affair, seeking advice on whether to disclose the affair to preserve friendships or allow the situation to unfold naturally. Both Chelsea and Cody advise maintaining boundaries and allowing the truth to emerge without direct intervention ([25:02]).

     • Notable Quote: "[Cody] ... stay the fuck out of it until it all comes out. Because everything dark comes to the light one way or the other." ([30:44])

   • Handling Family Comments on Weight: Kelly seeks guidance on how to navigate unsolicited comments from family members about her weight loss journey without feeling judged or undermined.

     • Notable Quote: "It's never okay to comment on someone else's body... unsolicited comments about someone's weight and especially weight loss can be really painful." ([40:20])

   • Exercise Motivation Post-Wedding: Brittany struggles with maintaining an exercise routine after the initial motivation of looking great for her wedding has faded. She seeks strategies to reinvigorate her fitness goals despite a hectic schedule and lack of motivation.

     • Notable Quote: "Find some opportunities where you could work out 20 to 30 minutes, even if it's two to three times a week..." ([47:28])

Insights and Conclusions

Throughout the episode, Chelsea and Cody offer heartfelt and practical advice grounded in personal experience. They emphasize the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, and prioritizing mental and physical well-being. Chelsea's candid discussions about her reluctance towards traditional roles and Cody's openness about his relationship dynamics and professional challenges provide listeners with relatable and inspiring content.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Cody Rigsby: "We partnered with Owls Brew and we came up with three vodka lemonades... they're so delicious. I vouch for them." ([04:33])

• Chelsea Handler: "I am not invested that much into anything. I'm not preoccupied with a lover. So that feels a lot healthier too, and very mature." ([13:58])

• Cody Rigsby: "What you're listening to, T Mobile's coverage is no joke..." ([00:36]) (Note: While this is part of an advertisement, it's included here for contextual understanding but typically would be skipped in summaries.)

• Chelsea Handler: "If someone likes you while you're fucking, if they put your feet in their mouth, then they're very into you, definitely." ([26:53])

• Cody Rigsby: "You're gonna set yourself up for failure... So I think finding some opportunities where you could work out 20 to 30 minutes..." ([47:28])

Conclusion

"Men Found Useless with Cody Rigsby" is a compelling episode that blends humor, personal growth, and actionable advice. Chelsea Handler and Cody Rigsby engage in a meaningful dialogue that not only entertains but also provides listeners with valuable insights into handling complex personal and relational issues.

---

Additional Resources

• Cody Rigsby's Podcast: Tactful Pettiness – Available on Apple and Spotify.
• Owls Brew: theowlsbrew.com
• Chelsea Handler's Book: Available for pre-order for release on February 25, 2025.

Transcript

[Chelsea Handler]

Television has gotten really complicated, hasn't it? With so many apps, services and live tv, you can end up scrolling all day long just to figure out what to watch. I've been there. So that's what's so great about DirecTV. It is hassle free. DirecTV is a better way to watch whatever you want to watch. You get all your apps, live TV and even new recommendations on one home screen. And that means you don't have to plug in passwords over and over. DirecTV is available without a satellite. You can stream all your favorite shows. Sign up for DIRECTV [e-mail] unlike what.

[T-Mobile Ad Voice]

You'Re listening to, T Mobile's coverage is no joke because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network. Switch now. Keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off up to $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com KeepAndSwitch up to four lines via virtual prepaid card. Allowed 15 days qualifying unlocked device, credit service report in 90 plus days device and eligible carrier and timely redemption required. Card has no cash access and expires in six months.

[Chelsea Handler]

A mother's love deserves a gift like no other. Celebrate her love, strength and style with heartfelt jewelry from Pandora. From iconic charms to sparkling necklaces, rings, earrings and more, there are so many ways to say thank you, mom. Pandora even has in store engraving so you can treat your mom to a trip to the store and have your pieces engraved together with your own hand. So on Mother's Day and every day, tell her how much she means to you with a gift from Pandora. Visit Pandora in store or [e-mail] Every.

[Cody Rigsby]

Morning brings a fresh new energy. And no matter what the day holds, we come to the Today show for all of it.

[Chelsea Handler]

We get the best start to the.

[Cody Rigsby]

Day because we started together. Watch the Today show weekdays at 7:00am on NBC.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi, Katherine. Hello. Hello. This is Chelsea Handler. My name is Chelsea Handler. H A N D L E R. It sure is.

[Cody Rigsby]

How you doing?

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready for our show. I have the Critics Choice Awards tomorrow night. Everyone can watch those on E. What else do? Oh, I have exciting new lemonade coming out, you guys. I partnered with a lemonade brand called, well, a vodka brand, well, a boozy brand called Owls Brew. They're female founders. So I found these two women, you know, like I've been trying to come up with an alcoholic drink for many, many years. But the alcohol industry, like many industries, is so male dominated that anytime I would get far along in an idea, there would be some massive hiccup and it just didn't work. And if you've read my book, well, you haven't read my book yet. Cause my book is not out. It comes out February 25, so pre order it. I'll have what she's having. It comes out on my 50th birthday. Please celebrate with me. Your gift to me is you pre ordering my book. We want to encourage all of our book club readers to have boozy book clubs. So we partnered with Owls Brew and we came up with three vodka lemonades. There's classic, which is yellow, then there's pink, and then there is mint lemonade. So we have three really smooth non carbonated flavors. They're only $100 a can. I'm sorry, 100 calories a can. And they're delicious. I vouch for them. I went in for the tastings and we found something and it took almost no time. It is so much nicer working with women. It literally took one tasting day. I mean, I had spent hours and days with these other previous companies. Many years ago, I had given up on this idea. But when you do read my book, you will see why there is a vodka lemonade tie in. Because I had. I was an entrepreneur at a very young age and I opened up a lemonade stand. And then when I realized how much money I'd be making, I decided that I needed to larger margin of profit and opened up a hard lemonade stand.

[Cody Rigsby]

Perfect.

[Chelsea Handler]

So now we are. It is called Chelsea Handler's Vodka Lemonade from Owls Brew. They are hitting the shelves this month. You can also order it [e-mail] or you can go to your local stores. They're in lots of stores all across the country. So yes, Owls Brew, Chelsea Handler's Vodka Lemonade, please. For your book clubs, I mean, obviously for your personal life and having a great time too. But for your book clubs, when you're getting together to read my book, I really want you guys to enjoy Owls Brew with the book.

[Cody Rigsby]

That's fantastic.

[Chelsea Handler]

And we're gonna have it. All my book signings, we're gonna have Owls Brew.

[Cody Rigsby]

Awesome. You're never this excited about things. You must be really annoyed. I know.

[Chelsea Handler]

I am excited. Cause it's so delicious.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

My publicist who barely drinks at all, she's like, I love this. She sends me a picture every night. She's like, I Have one every night before I go to bed. I'm like, okay, well, you're a different kind of drinker than I am.

[Cody Rigsby]

Fantastic.

[Chelsea Handler]

Also, I'll be on. Oh, yeah, this is Critics Choice Award. The Critics Choice Awards are tomorrow night. I don't know what time for.

[Cody Rigsby]

In the evening. In the afternoon?

[Chelsea Handler]

7:00Pm Eastern, maybe? Yes, something like that. 7:00pm eastern on the E. Network.

[Cody Rigsby]

Well, we have a fun guest this week.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes, we have a very fun guest today. Speaking of vodka and Latin, Peloton star. Peloton star, Cody Rigsby. He is our. Well, he's a peloton guru, dancer, author, and host of the tactful Big Headiness Podcast. Please welcome a person I've worked out with several times, Cody Rigsby. Hi, Cody Rigsby.

[Cody Rigsby]

Chelsea, be very honest. Like, do you have any idea who I am?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I do.

[Cody Rigsby]

You do?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I do. Peloton all the time.

[Cody Rigsby]

Oh, you do.

[Chelsea Handler]

I appreciate the question, though. You're not wrong to ask that, and.

[Cody Rigsby]

I would have not been offended. I adore you. I used to watch your show in college with my boyfriend, and I've read your book, and I just. And I love that you're an advocate for not having kids. Although I have turned the corner on that. I think I might want them, but I'm not sure.

[Chelsea Handler]

Are you pregnant?

[Cody Rigsby]

I will be in a few days.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, wow. That's very premonitionary. Premonitionary.

[Cody Rigsby]

Oh, that's a good word.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, that really flew right out of my mouth. That is unexpected.

[Cody Rigsby]

Is it a real word?

And it flew right out of my mouth.

[Chelsea Handler]

Premonitionary means, like, my friend has premonitionary dreams. She dreams about same things, and then they happen.

[Cody Rigsby]

That's exciting.

No, I just know that I'm gonna fuck someone this weekend, so.

[Chelsea Handler]

But you can't get pregnant in the tushy, Cody. I talk about this, you know, modern medicine.

[Cody Rigsby]

You never know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Eventually, I feel like we're around the corner from men being able to carry a baby. I know we've had a couple of male people carry babies that had transitioned and kept transitioned from female to men, and then they were able to carry a baby because they still had their. What do you need to carry?

[Cody Rigsby]

Baby.

[Chelsea Handler]

A uterus.

[Cody Rigsby]

Uterus.

Yeah, something like that.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I feel like men are going to have become obsolete if they don't come up with some things, you know, like straight men. Straight men. Obviously, gay men are fine, you know, in my view, but straight men are going to have to bring more to the table because people are getting pregnant with or without them. You know there are animals that parthenogenesis. We've talked about this. Where you can get pregnant. It happened to an anaconda. She got pregnant without a male. It happened to a condor. A bird. Yeah.

[Cody Rigsby]

What?

[Chelsea Handler]

Uh huh. It's happened to like a lot of. Not a lot, but it's definitely happened. And it happened twice in zoos. So they had no exposure to the male species and they were able to just fertilize their own eggs.

[Cody Rigsby]

Jurassic park, here we come.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Haven't I talked to you about this?

[Cody Rigsby]

No.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, so then found my friend Emily told me about this a long time ago because I was doing it in my standup and then nobody really seemed to understand what the fuck I was talking about. So then I just started researching it more. But yes you can. Like we are a thousand years evolutionarily behind animals. So if animals are procreating without the help of sperm, there is a chance in the next a thousand years that the human species might be there. Especially if a straight white men keep acting like this.

[Cody Rigsby]

I love this.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you know what I mean?

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

So anyway, back to your pregnancy. Congratulations. In a few days, I guess. How does it feel, Cody, to become a well known person as an exercise instructor? First and foremost? Like, you couldn't have planned that, right?

[Cody Rigsby]

No, I did not plan that at all. You know, I've been working at peloton for 10 years now. And I just thought it was gonna be a side gig. Cause I was tired of being a cater waiter and working late nights at a fucking nightclub. And it's absolutely changed my life and I'm so glad that get to like help people be their best self while being a little silly gay boy on a bike.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah. I mean it's a real. I mean you really do have a different spin on the class. No pun intended.

[Cody Rigsby]

Pun intended.

[Chelsea Handler]

You do like have great energy, great vibes. You make the classes fun. I know people talk about you and how much they love taking your class. So good for you. That's fucking awesome.

[Cody Rigsby]

Thanks babe. Yeah, sometimes I'm like, you know, when I get into maybe my politician era, maybe when I run for Senate, like it will definitely be on my campaign speech in Texas.

[Chelsea Handler]

You should run in Texas first.

[Cody Rigsby]

I think I should. You know, that should be my goal. I'll just be. I think they called that a carpet bagger. Is that what they called it back in the day?

[Chelsea Handler]

Carpet bagger? But if that's. If you go from the north to the south.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, maybe so. I know JD Vance is A carpetbagger according to the Appalachians.

[Chelsea Handler]

Let's look up carpetbagger. You guys, we need to get to the bottom of this.

[Cody Rigsby]

Oh, okay. It is a person from the northern states who went to the south after the Civil War to profit from the reconstruction.

[Chelsea Handler]

So that's even worse than what we thought. But it's a double whammy because they went to go profit from reconstruction. So they were like, oh, oh, I see, I see. So it's not that bad. It's bad on one level. Okay, got it. That was right.

[Cody Rigsby]

So when I go on my, my, my senate stump speech, I'm definitely gonna be like, what? Only in America could like, could a cycling instructor make it into the pop culture zeitgeist and be successful and I'm.

[Chelsea Handler]

And then become a senator in Texas. I mean, I feel trajectory for you passionately all of a sudden.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, I, you know, someone's got to take out Ted Cruz one of these days.

[Chelsea Handler]

God. God willing. When the hell is that going to happen?

[Cody Rigsby]

I don't, unfortunately not anytime soon.

[Chelsea Handler]

Question for you, Cody. You grew up where you grew up in the south, right? North. North Carolina.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. So I was born in Los Angeles. I moved to North Carolina when I was eight.

[Chelsea Handler]

By yourself? You moved by yourself at eight?

[Cody Rigsby]

Just me, I got in a car and drove through. Now me and my mom and like our three cats and two dogs and a beat up Chrysler just packed it across the country and headed to North Carolina.

[Chelsea Handler]

And how was that transition?

[Cody Rigsby]

I definitely cried when we arrived there. There was no sidewalks where I could rollerblade. And then, you know, the tons of homophobia and racism that's in the south didn't settle well with my soul. So it was for an interesting upbringing.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I bet that wasn't a nice transition. It's not fun to go to the south once you've been exposed to the North.

[Cody Rigsby]

No. Well, in all honesty though, because I was in Los Angeles, looking back in retrospect, I am grateful that I grew up in North Carolina. I think it would have been. It's a sort of life besides the homophobia and the racism. I think if I landed in la, stayed in la, maybe things wouldn't have been great.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I feel like the homophobia and racism is just different in different areas. Like, I feel like it is very pervasive, but it's not allowed to show its like face, you know, in certain parts of the country, even though it still exists. Just like misogyny and all of this stuff kind of exists everywhere. But I once heard someone say like, oh, everyone thinks the south is so racist, but southern people are able to like cohabitate and live next to people that are different from them without having it be a big deal. Whereas in the northern cities we do self segregate. Like if you come to la, you see that it's so segregated, right? There's like Koreatown, there's Chinatown. Everybody kind of lives in their part of the thing, which isn't exactly what we're aiming for either. Anyway, Cody, back to you. I hear that you have, you have a long term relationship, right?

[Cody Rigsby]

No.

Well, I did, but that ended about four months ago.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, well, I'm glad I could bring that up then.

[Cody Rigsby]

You know what, I'm in such a good place with it. It was a six year relationship. We bro up once before for like six months. And I think that really affected the way that the second breakup happened. And I had a really hard first month with it and then I accepted it and I've been living my life.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, wait, I want, can I ask you about that though? Like, tell me how you think the first six month breakup impacted the second breakup.

[Cody Rigsby]

That's a great question. I think in the first breakup I was taking a lot of responsibility for like my wrongdoing. And so I just felt like I needed another chance to like give it a go and I could fix it and do all these things. I think upon having another year and a half together where I was able to go to couples therapy and do all the things and it still wasn't working. I think I landed in this space of just us not being able to meet our needs. And as much as that hurts and as much as I didn't make the decision, it was the best decision. I also really dove into the book Attached, which goes into attachment styles within relationships.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes, I've read that book. That's a good book.

[Cody Rigsby]

It's a great book. And I'm anxiously attached. He's avoidant. And that's just like water and oil. And it's possible, but it's just gonna bring up a lot of confrontation.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I wonder if it's ever possible to change your attachment style.

[Cody Rigsby]

It is. So half of the population is secure and then 1/4 is avoidant, 1/4 is anxious. And the goal is to put into practice self awareness and things in your life that you then become securely attached.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay. Cause that's interesting because I remember being in a relationship where I was very anxious, not avoidant anxious. And now and I. And I'm definitely not anxious anymore. Like with any relationship, I'M just secure because probably because I've done the therapy and gotten to understand myself in a much better way, which feels a lot better. There's nothing worse than feeling the preoccupation of anxiety about a relationship. Checking your phone, wondering if they're gonna show up when they say they're gonna show up, and having all negative thought cycles around a relationship.

[Cody Rigsby]

And yeah, you are secure because you know yourself, you know your boundaries, you know your worth, and when those things aren't being met, you know how to be like, hey, this isn't for me.

[Chelsea Handler]

Absolutely. And there's really not a lot of like, gray area anymore for me. It's like I don't care if something works out or it doesn't. I don't. I'm not invested that much into anything. Even if I were to fall in love with someone, I can't imagine getting so preoccupied at this stage in my life with like a lover. So that feels a lot healthier too, and very mature. And I've never felt mature until I was in my 40s.

[Cody Rigsby]

I aspire, I aspire to be you in that situation.

[Chelsea Handler]

So you have a new podcast coming out?

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, no. Me and my friend Andrew Chappelle have launched Tactful Pettiness. We actually just shot, we just recorded an episode today. It's been out since June. So if anybody wants to listen to Tactful Pettiness, get it where your podcasts are gotten.

[Chelsea Handler]

What platform are you guys on?

[Cody Rigsby]

On Apple and Spotify.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, great. So what do you guys, you guys give advice on the podcast?

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, yeah, we kind of go through like, you know, cultural moments, anything that's topical. And then we try to focus on like a relationship topic. Like today was like fighting. We also did travel last week, which was a lot of fun. And we take like listeners questions, dish out advice like only two opinionated homosexuals can.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's nice. That's nice. And your partner on the podcast, what's his name?

[Cody Rigsby]

Andrew Chappelle, who is an actor, Broadway actor, TV actor, and one of the funniest people I know.

[Chelsea Handler]

One of the funniest people you know. Yeah, that's nice.

[Cody Rigsby]

Can go, can go round around with. Can go round to round with me.

[Chelsea Handler]

Uh huh. How did you guys hook up?

[Cody Rigsby]

You know, just being gay in New York City. We've known each other for probably a decade at this point. Like a friend of a friend and going out on Fire island and, you know, our friendship is kind of interesting because he was one of those people that I didn't like at first, you know, like, where you kind of give a little side eye and you're like, I don't like this bitch. And those usually are the foundations for great friendships. Because once you get past that initial. That little initial bitchiness, and then you see that you have so much in common, it's like, oh, I don't know why I thought you were so horrible. Because you're awesome.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I agree with that. I always have stronger relationships where it's a kind of slow burn. I think the idea of making a great first impression, I don't buy that. I don't think that matters as much of all. People aren't who they are when you first meet them usually.

[Cody Rigsby]

Exactly.

[Chelsea Handler]

Everyone's kind of, you know, being on their best behavior or trying to show off or trying to be. I have a problem where try to. People try to be funny around me all the time. And I find that extremely annoying. You know what I mean? Like, when I'm in an airport or someone's on a plane next to me, they'll lean over and be like. And I'm like, no, no, it's not like that.

[Cody Rigsby]

I'm good.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, I don't need you to entertain me. I don't. Or they'll say. They'll have conversations that they know I'm in earshot of saying things they know that I'll like that I'm in accordance with or agreement with. I also find that exhausting. I wish people would just be normal. You. You know what I mean? Like, you don't have to make me laugh. Just talk to me.

[Cody Rigsby]

But whenever you're hanging out with. And I'll tell you the reason I'm thinking this. Like, whenever you hang out with, like, comedians or people that are in your field, do you feel like they're spitballing and trying to make you laugh or trying to, like, get in with it? Does that make sense?

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, my friend brought it up the other day. She goes, it's really annoying being around you and a bunch of other comics. Cause everyone's just trying to be so funny. And I'm like, oh, yeah, I would imagine that would be annoying without being a comedian. But I also don't pick up on that. You know what I mean? Cause that's natural. They're comedians. But when regular people try to be funny, sometimes it's very painful. You know, it's like, oh, God.

[Cody Rigsby]

I only say that because I did. As a dancer. I did SNL twice. And I remember being on the set and I was just like, oh, my God, these guys, like, especially the guys, they were just, like, constantly trying to outdo each other with the funniness. And I was like, guys, enough. Like, I'm just a little dancer extra, but, like, enough.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's fun that you were on. That you. Oh, yeah. You were on Dancing with the Stars.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, Dancing with the Stars as well.

[Chelsea Handler]

How was that experience?

[Cody Rigsby]

I'm so grateful that I did it, but it was honestly one of the most challenging and, like, things I've ever done and one of the things that beat me down so much physically and mentally and emotionally. But I'm so glad that I did it, and it was so good for my career, and they couldn't pay me enough money to do it again, but it was great.

[Chelsea Handler]

Why did it beat you down emotionally so much, you know?

[Cody Rigsby]

Okay, so a lot of my fame or notoriety came through the pandemic, and I was kind of encapsulated in this, like, digital space and not really being on my own in that. And so then to take, like, go from Internet famous to kind of TV famous and now have a lot of opinions about, you put out there a lot of, you know, negative stuff, positive stuff. It was really hard to absorb. I'm pretty. Someone who, like, is pretty strong and confident about themselves, but after doing the show for two months, you have no days off, you're exhausted, you're tired, and just, like, seeing a negative comment, like, would take me down. Also, I think with any reality TV show, there's things in play that are supposed to kind of fuck with you. Does that make sense?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, totally.

[Cody Rigsby]

And I wasn't ready for all that. Like, I commend my partner, Sheryl Burke, who's done that show for, like, 30 seasons.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I know Cheryl.

[Cody Rigsby]

The emotional ups and downs of that for 30 years, in a way.

[Chelsea Handler]

Seriously. Because then you're also. She's having to. All of those regular people are having to deal with their guests that they have on for the season and watching them go through their emotional turmoil. Right. So they become, like, counselors.

[Cody Rigsby]

Exactly.

[Chelsea Handler]

With Peloton, isn't there, like, a chat room or chat board? Do they give you feedback on Peloton?

[Cody Rigsby]

Do you mean, like, members at home, or are you talking about, like, my boss?

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, members at home? Is that. Is that a feature?

[Cody Rigsby]

It's not a feature. There's a leaderboard, so you can, like, compete.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right. Never got that kind of stuff.

[Cody Rigsby]

You know, like, there is a very rambunctious Facebook group of Peloton members where they will spew and, like, say all the things that they need to, but I deleted my Facebook, like, probably three years ago, so I'm very far.

[Chelsea Handler]

Good fucking. Unless you're a conspiracy theorist.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. Like, I think I deleted it close to, like, the 2020 election. I was like, I can't deal with this anymore. It's just people posting headlines about fucking politics.

[Chelsea Handler]

I can't.

[Cody Rigsby]

I got. I got out. I'm out.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know. I hear you. And do you ever co. Mingle with the. Or sorry, not commingle. Do you ever mingle with any of the other peloton instructors?

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I actually had, like, brunch on Sunday with two of my colleagues.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, that's fun.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. No, I mean, it's a very unique job, and only we know what it feels like to be on the platform and to be teaching fitness in this capacity. And, yeah, I have a lot of fun with them and a lot of respect for them, and.

[Chelsea Handler]

And it's also not something. It's so funny because it's such a great career that you would have never been able to imagine as a child. Because this job didn't exist as a child.

[Cody Rigsby]

Exactly. Yeah, exactly. I never thought that this is how my life was gonna play out. I've always had this idea of being, I guess, famous or being a personality. I think I tried to channel that through musical theater and then dance, and then it's so crazy that life put me in the right place at the right time for peloton, and it was, like, literally the perfect job for me. Like, perfect.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I love that. What a nice success story.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. No, I look back on it, I'm just, like, super grateful, especially because I grew up so fucking poor, and to now have the world is my oyster is fantastic.

[Chelsea Handler]

Did you run a marathon recently or do an Ironman?

[Cody Rigsby]

Abso fucking lutely not. You will not catch me doing that.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay. Because my friend Ange from Whistler ran, and I couldn't remember if it was you or one of the other guys. And she was like, I saw so and so from peloton. And I was like, that must be so. She's like, I ran right up to him. I couldn't believe it was him in person. I'm like, that sounds so annoying, Ang. Just like, stop. Don't approach that. I'm glad it wasn't you. Although it would have been funny if it were.

[Cody Rigsby]

The way that you feel about children is the way I feel about marathons. I don't need to do it. It's gonna do nothing for me.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm glad it's happening. Keep it over there.

[Cody Rigsby]

So happy it's happening over there. And, like, this was the first year of 15 years of living in New York City that I went to the marathon and cheered people on, and it was so cute. I love that. That was my perfect introduction to it. But you will not catch me running 23.6 miles. I think it is.

[Chelsea Handler]

I think it's 26.2 miles, right?

[Cody Rigsby]

Oh, 26.2.

[Chelsea Handler]

There we go. I have no desire. I'm with you. I am not trying to prove anything to anyone, but really myself, Like, I would never. I wouldn't run a half marathon. I mean, if it was for a charity, I would just pay for someone else to do it. You know what I mean?

[Cody Rigsby]

Here's the donation.

[Chelsea Handler]

I can't be bothered with that kind of chicanery. It's too much. No, no, no.

[Cody Rigsby]

Also, you want to keep your knees, you know?

Yeah. And I've, like, I've. I've tackled enough emotional trauma from my past to feel like I've accomplished something, you know?

[Chelsea Handler]

I hear you. I hear you. Okay, we're gonna take a break, and we're gonna be right back with Cody Rigsby.

[T-Mobile Ad Voice]

Unlike what you're listening to, T Mobile's coverage is no joke because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network switch. Now keep your phone, and T mobile will pay it off up to $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com keepandswitch up to 4 lines of your virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days qualified unlocked device credit service port in 90 plus days device knowledgeable carrier and timely redemption. Required card is no cash access and expires in six months.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

Does this podcast make you happy? Of course it does. That's why you're here. But it only comes out once a week. For happiness, every night. You need Adam and Eve.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

I'm talking about sex toys. It's cool. It's cool. You have earbuds in, right? Adam and Eve, America's most trusted source for adult products, has been making people very happy for over 50 years with thousands of toys for both men and women. Just go to AdamAndEve.com now and enter code IHEART for 50% off. Almost any one item, plus free discreet shipping. That's AdamAndEve.com, code IHEART for 50% OFF.

[Chelsea Handler]

A mother's love deserves a gift like no other. Celebrate her love, strength, and style. With heartfelt jewelry from Pandora. From iconic charms to sparkling necklaces, rings, earrings, and more. There are so many ways to say thank you, mom. Pandora even has in store engraving so you can treat your mom to a trip to the store and have your pieces engraved together with your own handwriting. So on Mother's Day and every day, tell her how much she means to you with a gift from Pandora. Visit Pandora in store or [e-mail] Every.

[Cody Rigsby]

Morning brings a fresh, new energy.

[Chelsea Handler]

This is today.

[Cody Rigsby]

And no matter what the day holds, we come to the Today show for all of it.

[Chelsea Handler]

When things are tough, we talk about it. When there's something to figure out, we dig into it. And when there's joy, we celebrate it.

[Cody Rigsby]

Because today is where it's all happening. We get the best start to every morning because we start it together.

[Chelsea Handler]

Watch the Today show with Savannah Guthrie.

[Cody Rigsby]

And Craig Melvin, weekdays at 7am on NBC.

[Chelsea Handler]

And we're back with Cody Rigsby.

[Cody Rigsby]

We are back.

[Chelsea Handler]

We're gonna give advice. Cody, you're good at this, right? I feel like you could be good and motivational.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. I mean, I love to give hard truths the hard way.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's what we're all about here.

[Cody Rigsby]

Unfortunately, a lot of people don't have good friends that are telling them honesty, honesty.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know that's what we're here for. The people don't ye. I mean, I know from my own set of friends that most people don't tell you the truth.

[Cody Rigsby]

Oh, no. My friends will sit me the fuck down and be like, bitch, what are you doing? And I love that. And I will do the same.

[Chelsea Handler]

I always. I'm an interloper. I always will intervene. Always.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

Well, our first question comes from Sherry. This one's a little confusing, but stick with it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Is it Sherri Shepherd?

[Cody Rigsby]

It is Cherri Shepherd.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay. Cause she just posted a clip of me talking about me not washing my legs with Kevin Hart on her show and then invited me for a collab. I'm like, no, I don't think so, bitch.

[Cody Rigsby]

You don't wash your legs.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't wash my legs in the shower. Do you? I mean, what's going. Why are my legs dirty? They're not. They're covered up all day. And when I wash my hair, the shampoo and the conditioner falls down my whole body and washes out. I get in my shower, I wash my Pikachu, I wash my asshole, I wash under my arms, and then I wash my butt like, the cheeks, so. Cause I don't want to get any, you know? Eczema.

[Cody Rigsby]

I see what you're saying there, and I can't say that, like, 100% I'm washing of the times I'm washing my legs. But. But I'd say, like 50%.

[Chelsea Handler]

If my legs are dirty, if there's dirt on them, I will wash them. But they're not. There's not ever dirt. My legs are never exposed. They're covered all day long. Like, what am I washing them for.

[Cody Rigsby]

Cody, Are you running around New York City with shorts on? That is the real question. Then you have to wash your legs.

So. Yes. I haven't been wearing a lot of pants, so, yeah, I wear shorts as much as I possibly should.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, then you should be washing your legs.

[Cody Rigsby]

Gotta scrub it.

Yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Even though you're not, you should be.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I do somewhat agree that the soap will trickle down, get onto the legs. It's not a full scrub.

[Chelsea Handler]

I go. If there's a crevice that I need to get into, then I will go there with the soap and the water. But the legs are out. My legs are out. I don't have to get in behind my kneecap. Like, there's nothing.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, but if you don't. If you don't wash your feet, nobody can put their foot in your mouth. Your feet in their mouth.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, that's fine. And by the way, the water, the soap and everything lands on my feet, too, right before it goes down the drain. So those are. I feel like, are clean.

[Cody Rigsby]

They're good. They're really clean.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Cody Rigsby]

Because my telltale sign if someone likes you and while you're fucking, if they put your feet in their mouth, then they're very into you, definitely.

[Chelsea Handler]

Or they have a foot fetish, or.

[Cody Rigsby]

They have a foot fetish.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I don't really need anyone to be sucking my foot. You know what I mean? There's so many other things, but, like.

[Cody Rigsby]

You know, from time to time, like, hey, okay, this works. I'm here for it. Go off.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I kind of have that attitude, too. Like, if you want to do it, but if you do it, like, if it is a fetishy thing, I'm not into it. Like, if it happens every time, then no, it has to be, like, sporadic.

[Cody Rigsby]

One time. We haven't even gotten to the question. I'm sorry.

[Chelsea Handler]

No, please. That's okay. Continue.

[Cody Rigsby]

There was one time, I was at this party in Fire island, and this guy asked me, he definitely had a foot fetish. He was like, can I just massage your feet? And I Was like, you know what? Go for it.

[Chelsea Handler]

And it was an incredible massage, of course. And why would anyone say no to a foot massage? I mean, I will take a foot massage from someone from isis. You know what I mean? I don't care who's giving me a foot massage. I love getting my feet rubbed.

[Cody Rigsby]

Exactly.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, question. We're ready.

[Cody Rigsby]

Question. Sorry.

So back to Sheri. She says, dear Chelsea, I have an ethical dilemma that I'm hoping you can give me advice on what I should do. Within my group of friends, there are two couples with a messy situation. Let's call them couple A and couple B. I'm close friends with all of them, especially the wife from each couple. Both couples have young kids. The husband from couple A recently confided in us that his wife has been having an on again, off again affair with husband b for over 10 years.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh.

[Cody Rigsby]

Husband A confronted husband B about their affair and he admitted it too.

[Chelsea Handler]

Great.

[Cody Rigsby]

Husband A is devastated and heartbroken. He hasn't made any decisions yet about what he's going to do. He feels that coming out with this and telling wife B will ultimately destroy two families. As far as I know, my husband and I are the only other people who know about the affair. And I feel terrible that I know this information. But I haven't told my friend, wife B about what her husband has been up to. What do I do? Do I tell wife B or leave it up to husband A to decide? This is such a difficult position to be in, and I wish I didn't know this information. If I keep it to myself, how can I continue my friendship with wife B? To make matters worse, this isn't the first time I've heard that husband B has been unfaithful. But in the past, I kept it to myself because I didn't know for sure. And I figured that saying something to wife B would more than likely ruin our friendship because she would ultimately believe her husband because he talks for a living and can be very convincing and influential. What do I do, Cherry?

[Chelsea Handler]

My. My disposition on this constantly changes depending on the set of circumstances and depending on the feedback we've gotten from callers who've called in with similar problems. Cody, why don't you go first and give your advice on this situation?

[Cody Rigsby]

Wow. First of all, the question felt like a fucking SAT question.

[Chelsea Handler]

I was like, hey, listen, just be happy. She fucking divvied them up to couple A and B the other day, dealing with 36 cousins, a nephew and an aunt, and a priest. I was like, what? I can't follow the story.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, they should honestly just be in a polycule because they're halfway there to all having sex with each other. They honestly need to reframe their idea of, like, I don't think monogamy is for everybody. And so maybe they want to explore some form of ethical non monogamy, but that's really on them to decide what they're doing with the mess. If I were the friend, I would kind of stay out of it. Because you already know the thesis. Like husband B is. Is cheating on. On wife B. And she's not going to believe you if you say it, so it's gonna ruin your friendship anyways. I would stay the fuck out of it until it all comes out. Because everything dark comes to the light one way or the other.

[Chelsea Handler]

I. I would agree. I'm gonna say that I sometimes I say tell on them, you know, like I want people to. But for this situation, I would say it sounds like it's about to come. All the chips are falling and like, not into place, out of place. Like everyone's gonna kind of get the situation soon and it's not your responsibility. It sounds messy. And if it's been going on for 10 years, that's a whole other level of unethical non monogamy. I like what you said. Ethical non monogamy. Cause that's important. You can have that if you're ethical about it and honest. But that's not what's going on here. Especially if that guy's a talker. Like, you don't wanna ruin your relationship with your friend. You know, I think it's best to just let. Let the chips fall where they may. And then you can get in there after and be like, listen, I was in a really uncomfortable situation and I didn't know if you knew and, you know, all of that stuff. I didn't wanna get involved in it because it was very confusing. But yeah, I say stay out of it.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

Yeah. I think a postmortem, when everything hits the fan, she can then come to the friend and be like, hey, girl. Like I did. This is why it was complicated. I love you. I'm here for you. Let me help you through this.

Yeah. Are you a monogamist, Cody?

I am not. I was going to say, as someone who has cheated on boyfriends, I feel like the way to go is non monogamy. But I am a firm believer that monogamy does need to be, at least for me, needs to be the foundation at first in the relationship. But as the years go on. Like, I just. I don't think I could only sleep with one person for the rest of my life.

[Chelsea Handler]

Life.

[Cody Rigsby]

I know. I know that I can't, but I'm not. I don't want to be polyamorous. I couldn't have a relationship with multiple people. Just fucking.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I don't know who put this monogamy into our heads to begin with. It's too. It's just. It's just very antiquated. It's starting to feel even though I'm a monogamous, like, when I'm with someone, I'm with them. I can totally see why it doesn't make any sense for long periods of time. You know, maybe five year, ten year intervals, even. Ten years sounds like too long. That's wrong. But some people really do love monogamy.

[Cody Rigsby]

No. And for the people that love it, go for it, babe. I just know in my soul it's not for me.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. It's like I know in my soul that I wasn't meant to be someone's wife or mother.

[Cody Rigsby]

Exactly.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, no regrets. In fact, every time I think about it, the fact that I don't have a child or the fact that I don't have a partner, I'm just so grateful. Like, I'm like, oh, this is so much nicer.

[Cody Rigsby]

So also, like, being married or like, in a long term committed relationship is not your vibe either.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't want to be married.

[Cody Rigsby]

No legal status. But you can be with someone maybe for the rest of your life. Maybe.

[Chelsea Handler]

Maybe. But let's be reasonable. I mean, I. Doubtful.

[Cody Rigsby]

You know, I love people who know what they want, and that's the perfect way to be.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I like. Yeah, I like to be stimulated. So to be stimulated usually requires a newness. This.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

At some point.

[Cody Rigsby]

Well, our next question. We'll start with Kelly. Her subject line is how to lose weight without quote, unquote, compliments. Dear Chelsea, bottom line up front. I'm about to go on weight loss medication, but I don't want people close to me to comment on my body changes. How do I let people know this without sounding cunty for context? For the past two years, my doctors and I have been trying to figure out why my body won't respond to eating responsibly and consistently. Attending a spin gym for about 12 of those months. This summer, she and my endocrinologist diagnosed me with pcos, and one of the symptoms is weight gain. We decided to try metformin and tweak my eating habits and exercise routine and regroup in December. Well, it's coming decision time, and nothing has changed. So it's time to pivot to an injectable. From ages 13 to 27ish, I struggled with bulimia, trendy diets, obsessive workouts that made me a slave to the gym for hours a day while tracking every gram of macros across every piece of food, among other disordered eating behaviors. After years of therapy, I'm now at my heaviest weight but healthiest mental state. I'm a firm believer in body neutrality. However, I feel my body just isn't meant to carry this much weight in this form, and I'm uncomfortable and know my body chemistry is just not operating correctly. Throughout my weight fluctuations, the one thing that has been consistent is that my family praises me when I'm in a smaller body. I understand this is a cultural thing, and they have the best intentions. I also know I have done the work to deal with how I perceive myself, but I worry that those around me will keep up with their old ways. Is there a way to get ahead of this or handle the quote, unquote compliments when I know they mean well, but also feel they could be damaging to me? Thank you for all the positive energy, Kelly.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi, Kelly.

[Cody Rigsby]

Hey.

Hey, Kelly.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hello. I don't know the answer to this. I don't know how you get people to not comment on. On your weight because it's so. Like, if you have a history with your family, that's one thing. You can have a conversation with them and explain to them what's happening and how you don't think it's healthy for your, you know, your. Your mental health to hear their feedback about your physicality all the time. This is Cody Rigsby, by the way. He's a. I noticed.

[Brittany]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, great. It feels like, okay, are you gonna have that. Is it gonna have a deleterious impact on you if. If regular people are commenting on your weight? Cause it's a very hard thing for people not to do.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

No, I know that it's my family, and they're not great at taking those types of conversations. Case in point, like, freshman year of.

[Chelsea Handler]

College, I lost, like, 40 pounds, and.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

My aunt, who's been like a pseudo.

[Chelsea Handler]

Grandmother to me my entire life, called.

[Cody Rigsby]

Me over and was just like, kelly, you look wonderful.

[Brittany]

I'm so proud of you.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

And this, that, and the other thing. And, like, that's where most of my compliments come from.

[Brittany]

My family.

[Cody Rigsby]

May I take a stab at this?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, please.

Well, first of all, I Commend you on, like, you being in the right place for your own journey, because you seem really grounded in, like, this is for my health. This is for my mental health. This is for me to feel confident. This is for me to feel my best. And I think that is the best mentality to have, especially around weight loss or working out. Our bodies are only gonna look a certain way for a certain time. They're gonna fluctuate, they're gonna change, and we don't have control over that. So I think that's a great mental space. That being said, also, we can't control other people's actions. We're not gonna be able to control the compliments that they give us. But I think that you can start to reframe those physical comments into a space of if someone's like, hey, you look great, Kelly. Since you've lost weight, you're like, thank you. I think just saying thank you to any compliment is fine. You could also take lead on the conversation of being like, thank you. But honestly, I feel amazing, and I've never felt better, and I'm really happy. And that's. That's the thing that I. You want to get across to them. It's just the way you feel and just taking charge of the charge of the narrative and know you can't control anybody whatever the they're gonna say.

I do think there's a little bit of room for some teaching here. I think if there are certain family members you're worried about kind of, like, really hitting the, like, oh, you look so skinny stuff hard, I think it's okay to, like, just address that with them. Like, I'm making some changes with my doctor for my health, and, like, I just would so appreciate, like, not commenting on my body or if someone does bring it up, saying, like, thank you so much. I know you mean well, but, you know, I'm the same person in a larger or a smaller body, so thanks for letting me know. But I'm. I'm feeling really happy and, you know, like Cody said, going into, like, I'm feeling happy about this XYZ in my life. It doesn't necessarily have to be, like, a. A body thing. It can be something that's just, like, something you're doing that's making you feel better in your life.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I also think it wouldn't be, like, okay if your family doesn't respond well to things, if you wrote a thoughtful email to your family and said, listen, I'm on this, like, weight loss journey. The times where I Have lost weight and have heard comments from you guys, which I know you are, you know, giving me, or compliments about how I look good when I lose weight or when I've dropped £40. You can give specific examples about your freshman year in college. The comments. I know you mean well, but those kind of comments and getting rewarded for having a smaller body haven't helped. So moving forward, it would really mean the world to me if we could just keep the comments to yourself about me and any sort of weight loss or weight gain I have. I need to do this for my own mental health. And this is something that's really important to me. And as people who love me, I can only imagine that you want to support that.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

That sounds doable. My family's not the type of people that you can have that kind of conversation in person with.

[Chelsea Handler]

So write it in an email. Let them all talk about it together and be like, oh, did you get the email? Like, let them reflect and actually digest what you're saying. It's not unreasonable. And once they know that it has that impact on you, they are gonna think twice about making those comments and you can say, we're in a different time. It's not really appropriate to be making these comments. I'm feeling so good about myself. I just want to keep feeling good about myself. And those kind of comments are not helpful for me. Me.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

Okay.

[Cody Rigsby]

No, I like, I like the sounds of that.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

I just, I guess I'm just nervous for, you know, sounding like, pretentious and part of me is pretentious.

[Chelsea Handler]

But you're not being pretentious. You're being protective of yourself. That's what, like, you're being self empowering. There's nothing pretentious. Forget about your family and where they're from. This is about you and where you're from and where you're going. Like, there's nothing pretentious about that. That's actually being really upfront and honest and, and there's nothing wrong with it.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

It's creating a boundary, communicating that boundary and telling people to, you know, not cross it.

Yeah. And I think, like, when people do, because you will have people who, who cross that boundary, even if you've communicated with them, you know, having that patience and being like, thanks. Like, this isn't really because I'm doing all these different things. This is because I'm treating the pcos that, you know, caused some of this weight gain and that sort of thing. You know, I'm working with my doctors and, and getting good treatment. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. And also do some of the work that Cody mentioned about taking those comments and kind of having them turn into a different comment in your head. You really can't control what other people are gonna say or how they're gonna react. So you have to kind of figure out the way that you're gonna be able to digest them in a different way. Instead of having it make you feel, like, uncomfortable, there's a way you can kind of empower yourself with those comments and be like. Like, I'm gonna take that. And this is what I know that they meant to say or that they wanted me to feel. So I am gonna choose to feel that way, even though it's an annoying thing to keep hearing.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, I agree. There's probably, like, a different way to sort of metabolize those comments that you're getting, you know, so to speak. But I also think it's really important to underscore here that, you know, we're in 2025. Like, it's never okay to comment on someone else's body. You know, whether their skin is discolored or they have an injury or they've lost or gained weight or they're wearing a medical device, like, it's okay to just not say anything. And, in fact, it's preferable to not say anything unless they bring it up and it's something that they choose to talk about. You know, unsolicited comments about someone's weight and especially weight loss can be really painful for people. I mean, people lose and gain weight for all kinds of reasons. I mean, they may be going through a period of grief. Maybe they've changed medication that's caused weight gain or weight loss. Maybe they're having a mental health crisis or they're dealing with an illness. Maybe they have an eating disorder. And those compliments really can get in their head and do really lasting damage. So I think it's really something that we have to pay attention to that, like, our words do matter, and sometimes even when we're trying to be kind, it can unintentionally be really damaging. So I think it's great to be able to set these boundaries with your family. But if you have, like, a neighbor who comments or, you know, someone else in your life who comments, one thing you can say is just like, yeah, I know bodies change in all kinds of ways for all different reasons, Right? And just, like, leave it at that. And, like, if it's a little awkward, it's okay if it's a little bit awkward. But with a comment like that you're not really giving any credence to, like, it's a positive thing or a negative thing, but you're also not denying that it happened. So it's a good way to set.

[Chelsea Handler]

A boundary, but don't be afraid about, of putting up boundaries. Like, that's what we're lacking.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Especially as women.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

Oh, yes. Certainly with my family. We're grossly close, so.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Okay, well, good. Send. Put together an email, compose it, take your time to write it, and I guarantee you you'll be surprised by the results or the response. I mean. All right, thank you.

[Cody Rigsby]

Thanks so much, Kelly.

[Brittany]

Thank you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Bye, Kelly. Bye.

[Cody Rigsby]

Have a good one.

I think that's such a good question too, because we don't necessarily know what people's backstories are, whether they have a condition that's causing weight gain. Maybe they're were depressed and lost £50. You know, it's a good teaching moment to have with her family.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I had a, I had, I was in Mallorca this summer, and this server, this restaurant that I go to a lot, there's a server. And from the beginning, I went in June, and then I went back in September. And when I went back in September, she had lost, like, I mean, like, 50 pounds. And she was never heavy to begin with. She was very muscular and, like, very healthy. And I didn't say anything because I knew better than to say anything. And she said something, and she was like, oh, my God, look at me. I'm wasting away. And I go, oh, my gosh, I know. You look amazing, like. And she goes, no, I've lost weight because of stress. And I was like, oh, oh, right, right up. You know, you.

[Cody Rigsby]

We're just learning terrible.

[Chelsea Handler]

I didn't, you know, and she wasn't happy about the weight loss, but I, I, I knew enough not to bring it up. But when she brought it up, I should have been like, oh, yeah, yeah. Plus, we were speaking Spanish, so that always goes sideways.

[Cody Rigsby]

You never know how someone's gonna interpret it. It's like when people say I look so skinny, I'm like, bitch, but what? I don't want to look skinny. I wanna look like a, like a muscular man. So it's like it gets fucked up in your head.

Yeah, We've been talking a lot about that lately about, like, not talking about, like, skinny, but talking about strong. Strong. We like strong.

Yes, yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

Fit and strong.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yes. Well, our next question comes from Brittany, and she is seeking some fitness motivation advice.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, perfect.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. She says, dear Chelsea, is it Britney Spears?

I hope so.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Cody Rigsby]

I'm writing in for some motivation on how to get into a better exercise routine and routines in general. I recently got married and before the wedding I was able to motivate myself to eat, clean and exercise by wanting to look amazing in my wedding gown. Which I killed it. Now I'm several months post wedding and I can't get motivated to do anything unless there's a staunch deadline. My wedding guest thank you cards I still haven't finished writing and overall I just prefer to lays around than start any of my home improvement projects. My partner is also trying to get into a gym routine, but oftentimes our preferred time to work out does not align. Pre wedding, I was involved with a spin class that I loved, which by the way, like both of these ones that mentioned spin, it was like kind of just a fluke, nice little thing there. So some serendipity, but the instructor moved away and the gym has not hired a replacement. Lastly, I cannot seem for the life of me to wake up early for my own enjoyment, such as to meditate or write in a gratitude journal. I wake up with barely enough time to prepare for my workday and always seem to rush out the door five minutes late. It just seems like an overall lack of diligence and structure. Sure. Do you have any tools or advice that might help me in my journey? Sincerely, a very tired person. Brittany.

[Chelsea Handler]

Brittany.

[Cody Rigsby]

Hi Brittany.

Hi Brittany. I love the way you spell it by the way.

[Brittany]

Oh, thank you. I'll let my mom know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Britney, why are you so tired?

[Brittany]

I don't know. That's the thing. And I. I have energy throughout the day, but when it comes to the motivation in the morning to get started or the motivation after I've been working seven and a half hours, I don't have it in me to like, I make excuses for myself as to why I don't want to wake up whenever my first alarm goes off or I end up, you know, after work. I just don't want to stop. I don't want to stop at the gym. I want to get home, I want to cook dinner, I want to chill in my PJs and watch TV. And I really want some. I want to see these changes in theory, but the action is just. I've had a hard time with that motivation to get there.

[Cody Rigsby]

Do you feel like you're getting enough sleep or you feel like you're not sleeping enough?

[Brittany]

Also, I feel like in general, once I get going, I'm awake. So I don't feel like I'm overall like tired during the day. It's just when it gets to about 10:30, I'm, I'm done.

[Cody Rigsby]

Do you work at an office or do you work from home? Do you have the ability to go work out in the middle of the day maybe, since you have more energy throughout the day.

[Brittany]

So my work day is generally. So I get to work at 7:30. I do go into the office most days of the week. I do have some flexibility to work from home, but I generally at work do not have any. I try to limit distractions as much as possible.

[Cody Rigsby]

So I think it's like, for me it's about building habits that you're going to do regardless of when it's comfortable or convenient and just putting those into your day or week so that they're so consistent that you show up when you don't want to. If you have more energy throughout the day and you have the possibility of working, even if it's just two days a week from home and you are already getting dressed in athleisure, you can pump from your meeting and then work out from home like in some body with a, with body weight. And you're not, you're not taking too much time away from your, from your work. At least you're getting in a few workouts a week. I feel like if you're already setting your goal on this mountain of like I gotta work out every day, you're already gonna set yourself up for failure. So I think finding some opportunities where you could work out 20 to 30 minutes, even if it's two to three times a week, maybe it's, maybe it's the two days you work from home and one, like maybe it's Saturday or Sunday and maybe you and your husband could work out on the weekend together since you're both off and that might be something fun that you could do. And don't let the workout have to be a chore, a task. Maybe you guys can go for a hike or a walk. Maybe you can just do something that's fun. I don't know if you like to dance, like do dance cardio. Do something that brings you a little bit of joy even as you make it a task.

[Chelsea Handler]

And I would also say just get in the habit of like, exercise lends itself to your life in multiple ways. It's not just about the exercise. It's about your mental clarity. It's about getting rid of any cortisol. You don't want to overdo it, but you do want to exert yourself To a degree, every day. Like, I would say to get up every morning and just walk for 20 minutes. Go power walking outside your neighborhood for 20 minutes, no matter what. You know what I mean? So that your body is moving, your body is getting energized, and you're like, like creating more energy for yourself throughout the day. Like, exercise is so related. If I don't exercise, I have no energy. That's why you have no energy. You know, if I go for three or four days without working out, I feel it. Even when I'm hungover or I've just been on a flight and I've been performing, I always get up and make myself sweat a little because I just makes me feel so much better and have so much more mental clarity. So I would try to incorporate like, as far as working out and doing a workout with weights and stuff, or, you know, you can get the Peloton app, you know, and do that at your house. You don't have.

[Cody Rigsby]

I was going to shamelessly plug that.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know. Well, that's why I had to do it for you.

[Cody Rigsby]

Cycling instructor. Your cycling instructor.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm a cycling instructor on Peloton now, too. That was our big announcement for today. I'm going to announce that. No, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. I'm just joking. But if you do get the. You can get the Peloton app and do these like, they have five minute ABS classes, they have 10 minute. You can do 40 minutes Pilates, you can do, do like you just make a commitment and do it with your husband. If you think that's a good partnership. Do you think that is, or would you rather exercise alone?

[Brittany]

I think that it's potential. Like, there have been times intermittently that we've both woken up early and gone for a walk around our neighborhood together. And we do enjoy walking, but it's. For some reason the mornings, my alarm clock will go off several times and I'll just keep snoozing it until I absolutely have to get up and going. And typically, I think if I were to walk every morning, I'd have to get up at 5 and go. And I feel like that's a normal time for people to get up and go. But for some reason in the mornings, my mind is just like, this isn't. I have a hard time, I guess, in the mornings deciding that that's. That that's a priority.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right. But it's. It is a priority because you're calling into a podcast to talk about it. So you're gonna make it a priority. What do you use? What's that? Is that a green like exercise ball that's behind you? It is. So fucking use it. I mean first of all, what kind of caffeine do you take to get up in the morning? Do you drink caffeine?

[Brittany]

I drink a cup of coffee about 20 minutes after I get up. I make sure I drink some water first or at least a few sips of water before I go in on the coffee.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I do okay, well that's healthy. That's a healthy habit. But why do you really have to wake up at five to exercise? What time do you have to be at work?

[Brittany]

So I try to get to work by 7:30. It usually ends up walking in around 7:45 with traffic and everything. But I try to get, I try to leave my house by 6:45 and then.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, well that is pretty early. That's probably why you're tired. I mean most people go to work around 9 for an office job and you get done at 5pm or 6pm.

[Brittany]

I typically try to leave work by 4:30 to try and skip some of the traffic and then I'll get home usually around 5:30, 5:40.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know for me I have to work out in the mornings to really get it done. So it really, you have to kind of experiment with your personality because it sounds schedule wise, like it might be more prudent for you to get home from work and then go for a power walk around five. It's the perfect time. It's before dinner, you know what I mean? Get home, go for a walk, reflect on the day's activities and then figure out a workout that you could do like two or three days a week. But I think it's important a health wise to keep your body moving every single day, you know what I mean? And then it becomes kind of addictive in a great way. Like there's, you know, you don't want to be exercising for three hours a day and no one's suggesting that, but you need to pick a time and commit to whatever time you think it's going to be more feasible to actually follow through. And maybe that is when you get home from work, if it's not during your lunch break or if it's not at 5 in the morning, it's dark at 5 in the morning. So like I can understand why that would be hard to get up and start exercising. So let's figure out what time makes the most sense for, for you. What time do you think that is?

[Brittany]

Historically, I've definitely leaned towards, you know, getting off work, stopping by the gym, doing whatever it is I do, whether it be a group workout class or an elliptical stairs Stairmaster, whatever it may be. Like, I. I used to be really good about doing that. And then I think just over the last few years, I've kind of lost my way in a gym. Like. Like, I don't necessarily know what I should be like, what I should be focusing on. I kind of walk in and I'm like, okay, what do I want to do today? And then I spend 20 minutes looking on Pinterest for workouts to do at the gym for this muscle group. And then I end up, you know, doing that for a while. And I feel really good about it. But I guess I haven't been successful in making that an weekly, like, schedule thing.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, well, you're gonna do that now. You're gonna write it down that you're gonna exercise. You're gonna do a workout three times a week, and you're gonna do a nice walk, whether it's at the gym, whether it's the elliptical. Three times a week, you're gonna do 20 minutes on an elliptical, on a treadmill or a bike, whatever kind of cardio. And then three times a week either, and they could be on the same day or whatever. You're gonna do a class. You could do a Pilates class, you could do weight training class. You write it down. I am going to commit to this. And every single morning you're writing it down. And keeping a diary of what you're doing so that you're accountable. And if your husband decides to come along for the ride or can join you in any of those activities, great. But I think you should go from work, commit to three days a week that you're gonna leave work and go straight to the gym. You don't even have to spend a whole hour there. You can go there, jump on the elliptical for 20 minutes and leave. Just get into the habit of forming a habit.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah. A lot of gyms have either an app or a program where they'll give you a list of, like, here's what you do Monday, Wednesday and Friday, and it's like 20 minutes of maybe strength exercises on different machines or using free weights. And like, it's all done for you. Like, you don't have to think about anything. So ask at your gym and see if they have that. I also, a workout buddy might be helpful here too, because your husband might not be the workout buddy you need. You might need somebody like, if I don't show up, so and so is going to be like sitting there pissed at me. So, like, I got to get my ass over there.

Well, a workout buddy, though. And like, especially if it's your husband, like, it can be a double edged sword. Like, it might motivate you, but it also will be if he's not in the mood and he's like, oh, let's skip today. You're going to be susceptible to falling into that, you know, habit. So I, I try to be on your own journey.

[Brittany]

Absolutely. He and I have definitely gone back and forth like, hey, let's do this. And he'll be like, I don't feel like it.

[Cody Rigsby]

Yeah, I think it's gotta be not that important.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Cody Rigsby]

Put your mask on first.

[Chelsea Handler]

Also, the exercise will permeate into your life in other ways. You're gonna finish your thank you cards, you're gonna get all that together because you're gonna have.

[Brittany]

I've done that, actually. I did finish and just got them mailed out this week. So I'm really proud of that. But also like kind of kicking myself in the ass because it took me seven months.

[Cody Rigsby]

But that's okay. You have a year.

[Chelsea Handler]

Doesn't matter.

[Cody Rigsby]

So you are several months ahead. You're great.

[Chelsea Handler]

You got it done. Okay. And also, I want you to write the sentence down to yourself. Write it down. I am a powerful, strong woman. And I am going to become more powerful and more strong.

[Cody Rigsby]

Strong.

[Brittany]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay. And that's what you're gonna do. And write down your schedule for the week, what you're gonna do. And you're gonna be able to take days off, and you're gonna be able to get motivated. But write down the days. Monday, Wednesday, Friday. I'm going to the gym straight from work. Even if it's for a half an hour. You're going to just get into the habit of forming a habit. It's as simple as that. And once you do that for three weeks, you're gonna wanna keep doing it and you're gonna wanna get stronger and you're gonna see the results and you're gonna feel healthier and you're gonna feel more motivated and it's all gonna work out. So this is your pep talk. Okay?

[Brittany]

Thank you so much, Chelsea.

[Chelsea Handler]

You're welcome.

[Cody Rigsby]

All right, thanks, Brittany.

Bye.

[Chelsea Handler]

Bye.

[Brittany]

Thank you all so much.

[Cody Rigsby]

Thanks.

[Chelsea Handler]

I like these questions. I'm so lazy. I can't get out of bed. What do I do? Get out of bed.

[Cody Rigsby]

Get out of bed.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you know how grateful we are able to be able bodied and have the ability to move our bodies. Bodies like we have to remember that. Not everybody can do that. You know, you have full utilization of your body, you better be using it.

[Cody Rigsby]

And it only gets more limited the older you get.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, and laziness gets more laziness. You know, if you're lazy and you don't. Yeah, I mean, I don't like to call anyone lazy, but some people just are, you know. And then what?

[Cody Rigsby]

Well, and on that note, we can take a little break and come back to wrap up.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, we'll be right back.

[T-Mobile Ad Voice]

Unlike what you're listening to, T Mobile's coverage is no joke because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network. Switch now keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off at the $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com KeepAndSwitch up to four lines of a virtual prepaid card. Last 15 days qualifying unlocked device, credit service port in 90 plus days device and eligible carrier and timely redemption required card is no cash access and expires and months.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

Does this podcast make you happy? Of course it does. That's why you're here. But it only comes out once a week for happiness, every night. You need Adam and Eve. Yes. I'm talking about sex toys. It's cool. It's cool. You have earbuds in, right? Adam and Eve, America's most trusted source for adult products, has been making people very happy for over 50 years with thousands of toys for both men and women. Just go to AdamAndEve.com now and enter code IHEART for 50% off. Almost any one item plus free discreet shipping. That's AdamAndEve.com code IHEART for 50% OFF.

[Chelsea Handler]

A mother's love deserves a gift like no other. Celebrate her love, strength and style with heartfelt jewelry from Pandora. From iconic charms to sparkling necklaces, rings, earrings and more, there are so many ways to say thank you, mom. Pandora even has in store engraving so you can treat your mom to a trip to the store and have your pieces engraved together with your own handwriting. So on Mother's Day and every day, tell her how much she means to you with a gift from Pandora. Visit Pandora in store or [e-mail] Every.

[Cody Rigsby]

Morning brings a fresh new energy.

This is TODAY with and no matter.

What the we come to the Today show for all of it.

[Chelsea Handler]

When things are tough, we talk about it. When there's something to figure out, we dig into it. And when there's joy, we celebrate it.

[Cody Rigsby]

Because today is where it's all happening. We get the best start to every morning because we start it together.

[Chelsea Handler]

Watch the Today show with Savannah Guthrie.

[Cody Rigsby]

And Craig Melvin, weekdays at 7am on NBC.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, we're back with Cody Rigsby, TV Magic. So you can catch Cody's podcast, Tactful Pettiness. Tactful Pettiness anywhere. You get your podcast and you can hear him talk about a bevy of different things. Cody, it was a delight to meet you. I'm sure I'll run into you somewhere or somewhere, somehow, sometime.

[Cody Rigsby]

I hope so. I hope so.

All right. And where can people find you on socials and stuff?

Cody Odierigsby on instagram. Odierigsby on TikTok. Cause some bitch took my name before I could get it. But that's fine.

[Chelsea Handler]

What a bed.

[Cody Rigsby]

Okay, thanks, Cody.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thank you, Cody. Have a great day.

[Cody Rigsby]

Bye, booze.

If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an [e-mail] and be sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brad Dickert executive producer Kathryn Law. And be sure to check out our merch@chelsea handler.com.

[Pandora Ad Voice]

Does this podcast make you happy? Of course it does. That's why you're here. But it only comes out once a week for happiness, every night you need Adam and Eve. Yes. I'm talking about sex toys. It's cool. It's cool. You have earbuds in right? Adam and Eve, America's most trusted source for adult products, has been making people very happy for over 50 years with thousands of toys for both men and women. Just go to AdamAndEve.com now and enter code IHEART for 50% off. Almost any one item plus free discrete ship shipping. That's AdamAndEve.com, code IHEART for 50% OFF.

[Cody Rigsby]

This is Radhi Devlukia from a really good cry. Did you know that approximately one in three Americans have insulin resistance and consume over 300% more than their daily recommended intake of sugar? Have you been wanting to beat your sugar cravings? Well, I did a 30 day sugar fast and I found Apothecary sugarcake that helped me through it. Their potent tincture features Japanese inspired ingredients studied for their ability to support healthy blood sugar levels, giving you more energy, less fatigue and fortified longevity. Find Apothecary in sprouts farmers market stores nationwide and online at ulta.com, amazon and apothecary.com that's apothecary with a [e-mail] a.

[Chelsea Handler]

Mother'S love deserves a gift like no other. Celebrate her love, strength and style with heartfelt jewelry from Pandora. From iconic charms to sparkling necklaces, rings, earrings and more, there are so many ways to say thank you Mom. Pandora even has in store engraving so you can treat your mom to a trip to the store and have your pieces engraved together with your own handwriting. So on Mother's Day and every day, tell her how much she means to you with a gift from Pandora. Visit Pandora in store or [e-mail] Unlike.

[T-Mobile Ad Voice]

What you're listening to, T Mobile's coverage is no joke because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network Switch now keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off up to $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com keepandswitch up to 4 lines of your virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days qualifying unlock device, credit service port in 90 plus days device ineligible carrier and timely redemption required. Card has no cash access and expires in six months.