One Long Muscle with Mary Elizabeth Ellis

Summary

Dear Chelsea – Episode Summary

Episode: One Long Muscle with Mary Elizabeth Ellis
Date: April 16, 2026
Host: Chelsea Handler
Co-host: Katherine Elizabeth
Guest: Mary Elizabeth Ellis

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Episode Overview

In this lively and candid episode, Chelsea Handler welcomes actress and comedian Mary Elizabeth Ellis for a conversation that bounces from behind-the-scenes Hollywood stories to honest, often hilarious, takes on parenting, marriage, career transitions, and womanhood in today's world. The episode mixes personal anecdotes with listener call-ins, offering both humor and heartfelt advice on everything from family dynamics to big life decisions.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introducing Mary Elizabeth Ellis (05:46–09:00)

• Chelsea introduces Mary Elizabeth, best known as “the Waitress” on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia and roles on other acclaimed shows.
• Discussion about Mary Elizabeth's real name and nicknames:
  • “I go by Emmy. Because people get concerned about how long the day is going to be if they have to say my name a bunch of times.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (06:07)
• Reflecting on her upbringing in Mississippi, with family ties and her house even featured on a hometown HGTV show.

2. Hollywood, Marriage, and Always Sunny (07:08–09:56)

• Mary Elizabeth’s relationship with her husband, Charlie Day, and their unique situation of being a married couple on and off TV.
  • “We got married between season one and two. We put our honeymoon off so we could go shoot season two of Always Sunny.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (07:24)
• Behind-the-scenes story about how Danny DeVito was cast for Always Sunny to attract the FX target demographic.
• Discussing the comfort and family dynamic of working on a long-running show.

3. Parenting in Uncertain Times (10:16–15:37)

• Mary Elizabeth talks about her 14-year-old son and reflects on parenting choices in a complex world.
• Delving into the role of modern politics, societal change, and how children are shaped by current events.
  • “It is funny because D.C. is a really cool city. Like, generally speaking, when there’s... a respectable [president] in office… When I started my tour in D.C., there was definitely like, this odiousness in the air.” – Chelsea Handler (11:01)

4. Animated Movies and Emotional Connections (14:14–15:37)

• Candid exchange about the depth of children’s media, like K-pop, Moana, and Pixar’s Inside Out.
• Chelsea shares her late-in-life appreciation for animation’s adult themes.

5. Snakes, Fears, and “One Long Muscle” (18:22–20:15)

• Hilarious dialogue about personal phobias, especially snakes:
  • “They feel so amazing. Like, you think they’re gonna be slimy, but they’re not. And they’re all just like, one long muscle.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (18:50)
• Comparison of fears: snakes vs. spiders vs. sharks.

6. Hospitality, Career Paths, and Making Life Changes (24:51–28:04)

• Mary Elizabeth answers what surprised her most about motherhood, highlighting the dynamic with her husband over parenting choices.
  • “I need to soften. I am a little bit more of the... ‘no, buck up’ [parent]. But that’s how I am with myself.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (27:09)
• Discussion about treating ourselves vs. how we treat others, especially as parents.

7. Shifts in Womanhood and Competition (29:41–34:45)

• Chelsea and Mary Elizabeth reflect on how female competition has evolved into solidarity over their lifetimes, attributing this shift to cultural touchstones like MeToo.
  • “There’s been an understanding now that the tide rises together... It’s better for us to stick together.” – Chelsea Handler (31:40)

8. Media Literacy and Information Overload (34:11–35:56)

• The trio discusses the double-edged sword of having constant access to history, information, and misinformation, especially for today’s women and kids.

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Listener Call-Ins & Advice Highlights

Parenting Boundaries & Postpartum Anxiety (40:39–44:00)

• Caller: Marcia, concerned about a friend being overprotective with her baby.
• Mary Elizabeth empathizes, sharing her own challenges with postpartum anxiety.
  • Advice: Tolerance, gentle support, and helping friends get comfortable going out with their baby.
  • “Maybe the friend could offer: if I went with you, is that something that you would be interested in?” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (43:02)

Navigating Life Transitions & Career Choices (45:14–55:10)

• Caller: Kevin (she/her), feeling stuck living at home, unsure whether to pursue dating or career changes.
• Chelsea and Mary Elizabeth advise focusing on self-discovery and career before romance.
  • “I think you should figure out what makes you feel excited about the future... You should take this time, reclaim this time.” – Chelsea Handler (47:04)
  • “Life is nothing but change, so you probably won’t get stuck somewhere.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (53:38)

Career, Motherhood, and Growing Pains (57:40–63:21)

• Caller: Dominique, facing a choice between expanding her career or starting a family.
• Advice: Don’t feel forced to choose or to hurry—consider ways to structure career growth to allow for both.
  • “It’s not one or the other. It’s, how do I do it all? Because we can do more than one thing at the same time.” – Chelsea Handler (61:36)
  • “There’s seasons to things, but there’s space for everything.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (60:38)

Caring for Aging Parents (70:21–71:43)

• Caller: Jody, struggling with in-laws’ health decline and a father-in-law’s denial.
• Advice: Intervene with kindness and urgency; get siblings involved and consult professionals.
  • “You have to go in and do that. You have to get your brothers together in solidarity or do it yourself. But take her to the doctor for a diagnosis, that’s it.” – Chelsea Handler (70:21)
  • “Maybe time for a guardianship or conservatorship... but definitely start reaching out to someone in your community who is able to give you some answers.” – Katherine Elizabeth (70:46)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “One long muscle.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis describing snakes (18:50)
• “Every two. All women want to have children together because it just makes more sense.” – Chelsea Handler (10:23)
• “Being a woman right now is, in of itself, a raging hormone.” – Chelsea Handler (28:47)
• “We have so much information about all the things that weren’t being told... Even though there’s so much false information, it’s hard to be lied to when you have access to the truth.” – Chelsea Handler (34:11)
• “Life is nothing but change, so you probably won’t get stuck somewhere.” – Mary Elizabeth Ellis (53:38)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 05:46: Introduction of Mary Elizabeth Ellis
• 07:24: Shooting Always Sunny and Danny DeVito story
• 10:35: Parenting a teenager during today’s uncertainties
• 15:37: Animated movies and adult themes
• 18:50: “One long muscle” snake discussion
• 27:09: Parenting style differences
• 31:40: Shift in womanhood and solidarity
• 40:39: Marcia's call about a new mom friend
• 45:14: Kevin seeking career/dating advice
• 53:38: Not being stuck – advice on life changes
• 57:40: Dominique’s call on career vs. motherhood
• 70:21: Jody’s dilemma with elderly in-laws

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Final Thoughts

This episode weaves humor, vulnerability, and insight through personal storytelling and real-life advice. The chemistry between Chelsea and Mary Elizabeth brings warmth and honesty, especially as they address changing roles for women, evolving attitudes toward parenting, marriage, and self-worth. The caller segments are practical, empathetic, and often quite funny—making this installment both entertaining and genuinely helpful for listeners at any life stage.

Transcript

[Chelsea Handler]

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[Chelsea Handler]

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[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

April 24 is St. Louis, Missouri.

[Chelsea Handler]

April 25 is Minneapolis. April 30 Nashville May 1 Charlotte, North Carolina. May 2 is Durham, North Carolina. May 6 in Los Angeles at the Saban Theater. Theater for Netflix is a joke. April 15 I will be in Saratoga.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

April 16 Monterey April 17 Modesto. I will be in Port Chester on June 4.

[Chelsea Handler]

June 5 I will be in Boston, Massachusetts. June 12 I will be in Portland, Oregon and June 13 I will be in Seattle, Washington. June 27 is going to be Hyannis, Massachusetts. August 6 is Red Bank, New Jersey.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

August 7 I'm coming home to Montclair, New Jersey.

[Chelsea Handler]

August 15 is Calgary, Alberta.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

September 18 Santa Barbara September 19 San Diego.

[Chelsea Handler]

September 25 I will be at the

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

Beacon in New York City. September 26 I will be in Philadelphia. September 27 New Haven, Connecticut. October 2 Atlanta, Georgia. October 3 Baltimore, Maryland.

[Chelsea Handler]

October 4 Saginaw, Michigan. October 9 Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

October 10 Toronto, Canada.

[Chelsea Handler]

October 16 I'm coming to Boise, Idaho. October 17 Spokane, Washington. November 7 I will be in San Francisco and November 13 Salt Lake City. November 20 Austin November 21 Houston, Texas. November 22 Irving, Texas. December 5 I am adding a second show in Denver for those of you who couldn't get tickets to the first one. And on December 6th I will be coming to Vancouver, Canada. Okay, those are all my dates for the high and mighty door. Go to Chelsea handler.com for tickets. Hi Katherine.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Hi Chelsea.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Hi.

[Chelsea Handler]

I was just reading on my phone that there is a new island in Finland that is designated for women only. Women only because they don't want to be looked at or gawked at by men and that men are. I just was in Finland and I have to say that it was very you could feel the equality. I don't know what that means, but more like everyone looked exactly the same but on the other side of that, there's always this backlash that men think, oh, you're discriminating against us. It's like, hello, there have been men's clubs and golf clubs for sure, since the beginning of time that do not allow women. Like, women are allowed to do that. Men are allowed to do it, too, by the way. You're not. It's not a problem.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yeah. So go ahead and make your own island. Anyway, that's where we saw what happened last time that happens. A man having his own island. No islands for men.

[Chelsea Handler]

No islands for today. Okay. Our guest today, you know, from Netflix's man on the Inside. And as the waitress from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, please welcome Mary Elizabeth Ellis. Okay. We're here with Mary Elizabeth Ellis, and I know that I can only call you Mary Elizabeth.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

That's right.

[Chelsea Handler]

You go by Mary Elizabeth.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I go by Mary Elizabeth.

[Chelsea Handler]

No, Mary.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I go by Emmy.

[Chelsea Handler]

Emmy, okay.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Like, Emmy.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. Because people get concerned about how long the day is going to be if they have to say my name a bunch of times.

[Chelsea Handler]

Did you grow up going by Mary Elizabeth?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I got called Mary E. I grew up in Mississippi, so I got called Mary E a lot.

[Chelsea Handler]

What was Mississippi? What was going on in Mississippi when you were growing up?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Well, I wasn't aware of it because I was just in it. You know what I mean?

[Chelsea Handler]

Now, what's going on in Mississippi?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I don't want to know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you have family there still?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah, my family still. So there's a. We were just talking about Property Brothers, and there's a HGTV show called Hometown.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's my hometown.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

That's such a good choice. I grew up there. My, like, house that I grew up in has been on that show, right?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Oh, really?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. Laurel, Mississippi.

[Chelsea Handler]

Wow.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm Mary Elizabeth, and this is Katherine Elizabeth.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I am Katherine Elizabeth.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Hey, Katherine Elizabeth.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

But you don't have a middle name, do you?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I mean, technically my middle name. Sure. Like, I just go by both of them.

[Chelsea Handler]

What does your husband call you?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Emmy.

[Chelsea Handler]

And all your friends call you Emmy.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Emmy, yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, yeah. Because you've been on set this whole time with each other.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I only. I'm only ever on set.

[Chelsea Handler]

I like the fact that everyone in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is married.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I know. I saw Caitlin on here.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, she was on here recently, too. Yeah, I love her. She was great. But you guys are all married. But playing roles where? Well, I mean, maybe that. But you were married before the show, right?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Well, Charli and I were together before the show. We got married between season one and season two. Like, we put our honeymoon off so we could go shoot season two of Always Sunny.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's romantic.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. And was like, just a crazy time because we shot season one, and then FX was like, we really. This isn't our demographic. Cause at the time, it was like the Shield. It was like old white dudes that were watching fx. So they were like, you guys need an old white dude basically to be on. And John Langgraf had been running Jersey films with Danny DeVito. So he was like, how about Danny DeVito? And we were like, oh, okay. Does Danny DeVito want to be on our show? Like, we were a one season basic cable.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's so funny that they needed to get an old white guy, like, just in there. Like, that's. We can't do a show unless we have an old white guy.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Because there's such a hot demand.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. Well, we just weren't their demographic, I guess.

[Chelsea Handler]

So.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. They were like, how about Danny DeVito? And we were like, I'm sure Danny DeVito wants to do our show. And then he was like, yeah, I'll do it. And we were like, great. Get naked and crawl out of this couch.

[Chelsea Handler]

I think he's probably fine with that. I've seen him out in the wild, and he seems like a fun guy to hang out with.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

He's a party.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. What's it like to be on a show for that many years? Is it just so cozy and comfy?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes. I mean, it's like going home and seeing family. You know what I mean?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And I only do, like, two or three. Three episodes a season, and we shoot so fast that usually. I mean, I already shot two episodes for this season, and I'm done.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

Great.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. And Carol Kane is on the season. Have you gotten to work with her? No, I just like. She's like another one that I just. I'm also getting to work with Mary Steenbirge in all my other shows, so, like.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah. Cause you're in this new show with Ted Danson. Well, not new show. It's not new. New. New. But man on the inside. Man on the inside with Ted. But Mary and Ted together, I think, are one of the cutest couples.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Cutest things. Cutest things of all time. It's also cute how he's kind of like. And she's like, stop.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I did his podcast. I did his podcast a few months ago, and Woody wasn't there. Woody Harrelson wasn't there. I Think they co hosted, but Woody shows up.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Like, he's, like, never there.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, he, like, shows up when he can, which is not often. And I. Ted was. I could just see Ted's trepidation about being, like, alone and having a conversation with me.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Alone with you.

[Chelsea Handler]

He was just like this. And I was like, it's okay, Ted. I'm okay. Like, I'm gonna be nice. It's gonna be okay. Like, I'm not going to attack you or emasculate you in any way. He's like, I know, I know. But you're just a lot. I'm like, I understand. I understand. It's not for everyone, but Mary is. Mary puts him in his place.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah, she's not.

[Chelsea Handler]

And she's not a lot. Like, I'm a lot. But she's all woman.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

She also is, like, every time she tells a story, she's like, well, I woke up in the Lincoln Bedroom. And you're like, I'm sorry, what? Like, you know, every story is just, like, incredible. She's been like Forrest Gump, like, in the most amazing places her entire.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. And so you guys have a kid together, you and Charlie?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Charlie and I have a kid together.

[Chelsea Handler]

Not you and Ted and Mary.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Not Ted. I would love to have a kid with Mary.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Yeah. Every two. All women want to have children together because it just makes more sense.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

There aren't many men that. I'm like, oh, I'd love to have a kid. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

And how old is your son?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Our son is 14. And he. I'm sure he'll be back by the time this airs, but he's in D.C. this week on the, like, you know, requisite eighth grade.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, really?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Like, field trip to D.C. oh, yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, it's a weird time to go

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

to D.C. i mean, to go to D.C. yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I know.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I was like, is it safe? And they were like, is going to school safe?

[Chelsea Handler]

Is anything safe right now? Nothing's really safe. It is funny because D.C. is a really cool city. Like, generally speaking, do you mean, like,

[Katherine Elizabeth]

historically or like, to hang out in?

[Chelsea Handler]

Both. When there's. And I don't just mean when there's a Democrat in office. When there's a president in office, you know, a respectable one. It's just a. It's a cool city. It has this history. It has a nightlife. It has. There's politics. I love politics. I love being around, like, that kind of energy and hearing and talking to people that are, like, in the political world. So it is a really cool city to Go to. But right now I started. I'm on tour. I started my tour in D.C. that was my first show. And they were like, we. You know, like, things are dire. And there was definitely, like, this odiousness in the air. You know, you go there. Cause it's like you look at the White House and it just represents something completely different.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. And it's being torn down halfway.

[Chelsea Handler]

Exactly.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. So anyway, I know it is. It's a strange time, but. But it's been interesting because they send, like, pictures. And just seeing, like, your kid in front of the Capitol building or like, the Washington Monument, you're like, okay, good. I'm. I'm glad he's at least, like, learning. I don't know about how our country was founded.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know. I wonder how children will be. Yeah, I haven't even gotten that far in my thinking, you know, like, to be circumspect about it, like, to. To think about how this will affect the children that are growing up in this time. I'm just thinking about how it affects the world in an immediate way. But, yeah, that's kind of like a whole other reason never to have children. I mean.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

No, I know. I think it would be really hard right now to make that decision. But also, there's always the argument of, like, well, if people who are forward thinking aren't having children, then, like, we're gonna be screwed in the future. So I think it is important also to, you know, be having kids and teaching them, like, the right things, the right things for us, you know, My goddaughter is almost 16, and we were having a conversation, and I was like, yeah, it was during that protest, you know, and she was like, which one? The women's march or Stop Asian Hate or the no Kings one or the. And I was like, oh, my God, this kid has been protesting her entire life. Wow. You know?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, that is. That is interesting to think about.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I read that when I was reading your packet. Our research packe that you are able to cry on cue because of your sister's abuse.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes. Thank you for naming that. Rebecca.

[Chelsea Handler]

Rebecca, we're talking to you. Tell us a little bit about that.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I'm like, please don't make me do it right now, though. I feel like I don't.

[Chelsea Handler]

No, no, no, no. We don't. We're not. We don't want anyone crying on the.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Did you see K for Lance show that she did? She made herself cry every night. She would have to, like, cry, like, with a camera on her in the giant Auditorium. It was, like, pretty. And a pretty amazing thing to make yourself have to do.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I mean, are you able to do that in a second?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I don't know. I think probably. Probably still there's enough to cry about that I feel connected to.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, that's true. I guess you don't need a lot to. Do you think you could cry on cue?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yes, but I'd have to, like, get there.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I mean, I think even if I'm like. I don't know, like, even. Golden Song. Golden from, like, K Pop Demon Hunters make me cry.

[Chelsea Handler]

Does it.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Does it make me cry?

[Chelsea Handler]

People love that song.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I love it. It's so. I think also because I don't have a kid that makes me listen to it all the time when it comes on that and like, Moana. Song of like. I love Moana.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You sound like Kara Swisher. Do you ever listen to Kara Swisher?

[Caller/Guest]

No.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

No.

[Chelsea Handler]

She talks about K Pop Demon Hunters and Moana all the time, but she has little kids. Okay. Yeah. Y. So is K Pop Demon. I don't know anything about K Pop.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Everyone loves it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Is it for children or adults, though?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I mean, maybe you can answer that. But so many of my adult friends have been like, no, no, no. But you would love it. You have to watch it. I'm like, okay, I haven't watched it yet.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I'm like, was raised on Disney, so, you know, like, in my therapy sessions, my therapist will be like, what does that make you think of? And I'm like, I'm the witch. I'm like the evil witch with the apple, but I'm also Snow White. And I'm like, work, you know?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Because that's the point of them, right. Is to be, like, super big and dramatic and also, like, hold these themes that are so big.

[Chelsea Handler]

I remember I'm not that into, like, animated because I mistakenly associate animated films with children's films. I think that's how they kind of came on the scene. Right. Animation came on the scene. And so. And then when I once I watched Finding Nemo, I think was my first animated film that I watched, like, several years after it was out with my friend's kids. And I was like, these are pretty serious themes.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, these are themes for adults. Like, this is an adult movie, but it's just in cartoon.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I found that quite interesting.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yeah. Especially these days, you have, like, inside out that's all about, like, having big emotions. And, like, there's not a villain. It's like, your villain is anxiety or, you know, these dark thoughts and feelings.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Learning how to process them.

[Chelsea Handler]

So, okay, back to you and your husband. You've been married for 20 years and I've heard you say that it's like it's a full ongoing one night stand is how you reflect.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah, they just asked him. He's doing a press tour right now. Cause he plays the voice of Luigi in the Super Mario movie.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, really?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And that's about to come out, the second one.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, my favorite game.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

Super Mario Brothers. I spent hours and hours of my childhood.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Oh, so good. Did you play Jaws too? Do you remember the Jaws?

[Chelsea Handler]

I love the Jaws. I grew up on Martha's Vineyard in the summertime and they filmed the very first Jaws in front of our house. So the town I grew up in Amityville is Edgartown, Martha's Vineyard.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Oh, wow.

[Chelsea Handler]

Was the backdrop of Jaws. So I wasn't alive when they filmed the first one. I was the year I was born, 1975. But they filmed it in front of our house in the bay. It's called Katema Bay. And so Bruce, the shark that Steven Spielberg used and named would go back. My brothers and sisters would watch the movie being shot and they would watch the cranes. And they didn't go in the water for fucking decades after that because parts of Bruce are still there. But I didn't know Jaws was a game.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

It was like a Nintendo game. Yeah. Where you have to collect the conch shells and then at the end you get to try to stab Jaws. And it never does what you're trying to fucking get it to do. It never does what you want.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hard to maneuver as a shark though, like to pretend you're playing the shark.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

No, no, no. You're killing the shark.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, you're killing.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

You're the good guy who's killing the shark.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. What do you think about sharks? Are you scared of sharks?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I'm scared of sharks in a healthy way.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I'm with you.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm not crazy about it.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

No. Like, I'm not going to dive with them. But if everyone was going to dive with them and they were like, we're all going, I might do it. I don't want to be the one who's like, come on, we're all going to do this and then someone dies. But. And it was my fault.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right. Well, but most of the time when is not because they're going shark diving in those cages, it's because they are just like surfing or they're out in the water and Then they get bitten.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

And then. And I love the excuse that people say, like, they don't really like humans, but they just bite you and then they decide they don't like you. I'm like, that doesn't have any impact on what the impact is.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes. On my bleeding.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. We're still dying because they're attacking us. They really don't want to be attacking humans, but they are, so I'm sorry. That doesn't go well together. I feel like people are either really deathly afraid of spiders or snakes, and then sharks come in somewhere in the middle. I have a phobia. Mine is more than a fear of snakes.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Oh, of snakes.

[Chelsea Handler]

I get into, like, I could shake or, like, shock, and I can't move. If there's a snake around me, I have a huge reaction.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I'm a huge snake fan. I love snakes.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I like a snake. My brother had snakes growing up.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Like, if someone's like, your brother had snakes? Yeah, I'll hold a snake.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Not afraid.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

You're not afraid.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I am afraid of spiders, though. So you're theory.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm not afraid of spiders. I'm not afraid of spiders. I can kill spiders. What do you like about snakes?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Well, my mom is crazy afraid of snakes, so maybe mine's a reaction to be like, these soul things. I don't care, you know?

[Chelsea Handler]

And you can handle them and pick them up.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. Love. They feel so amazing. Like, you think they're gonna be slimy, but they're not. And they're all just, like, one long muscle. It's just really cool. I know.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

One long muscle is not a feeling.

[Chelsea Handler]

The motion within which they move and slither is like.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Like.

[Chelsea Handler]

Especially those sidewinder snakes.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

You know the ones?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

They had a picture once, and this was probably AI, but who knows? I believe it's real. It was like a golf course in Florida with just tons of those. Like, whatever those snakes are that are down there. The. Does Florida have rattlesnakes? I don't know.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah, cottonmouths. Florida's got every kind of snakes.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I know, I know. I can't wait for Florida to dislodge into the ocean. I'm dating a guy who lives in Florida, and I was like, I don't know when you're expecting me to come, because he's like, when do you think? I'm like, it's not gonna happen.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Would you go there on tour?

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Wow.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't really like the politics of the state. I like Floridians you know, and I'm sad that they live there, but I can't support that kind of economy. I just can't for some reason. Texas, there are other states that are much worse. But like Texas to me feels like there's hope in Texas. Like at some point Texas could flip. There's always people trying to flip Texas. There are pockets of Texas that are very democratic, just like there are in Florida. There are pockets. And every time I go to Florida, I have a great time and I go, I should come back here. But I just really hate what that state represents. It's another open carry state, burning books. I just find that all to be so ick.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah, it is hard. I grew up going to Florida. That's like where we vacationed because Mississippi, Alabama, Florida.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And so we still go there to Destin every summer. And it's the Redneck Riviera. It's so beautiful. Get our airbrush T shirts.

[Chelsea Handler]

I feel like I've been to Dustin, Florida, but I can't imagine for what. Cause that's a specific area. Is that on the east coast of Florida?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

It's on the Gulf of America.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

It's on the maps now. We were flying over the other day and it's on Google. I just wanted to cry. It's on the maps.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. So it's on the Gulf. We'll call it side.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, you can enjoy that. And you can enjoy your snakes down there too.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I will. I'll tell him you said, no, thank you.

[Chelsea Handler]

No, thank you, Florida. Meanwhile, watch. I'll add like four cities in Florida next week. No, I won't, though. I mean, I'll try not to. I'll try to stick to my word sometimes. Whenever I publicly. Do you ever find this happening when you make like a declaration or a proclamation? You end up doing the exact opposite. Like anytime you publicly declare something. That's why I'm so scared that one day I'll get married. Because I've spoken so much about refusing to get married.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. It might be coming for you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you ever do that? Do you ever make like declarations and then it happens or you do the opposite?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Sure. I feel like you make a declaration and then. Yeah. The universe is like, but are you sure?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, right, right.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

But it's also testing you.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I don't know. I know people like hate flip flopping and stuff, but sometimes we like grow and get a different perspective. Or you're like, well, actually let me maybe try this. And then yay. Or that wasn't for me. I tried it yeah, yeah,

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[Chelsea Handler]

have access to a lot of things that most people don't.

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[Chelsea Handler]

to you by BetterHelp. May is mental health Awareness Month. A reminder that whatever you're going through, you don't have to go through it alone. Life is a journey. Some days feel good and others feel overwhelming. Whatever's keeping you up at night, it's easy to feel like you have to figure it out all on your own. But the truth is, no one has all of the answers. Having someone with you to listen, to understand and to support you can make all the difference. This month, check in with yourself and understand where you are right now. If you've been feeling overwhelmed, stuck, anxious or unsure, it's okay. Those feelings are more common than we think and we don't have to navigate them alone. That's why there's BetterHelp. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, having served over 6 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 for a live session based on over 1.7 million client reviews. You don't have to be on this journey alone. Find support and have someone with you in therapy. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com dearchelsea that's betterhelp.com dearchelsea when it's time to get a new car, where do you start? Car shopping can be, honestly, a little overwhelming, but it should be fun. Buying your next car should be exciting. And it can be. And if you can remember one thing, it's cool. My dad was a used car salesman, so I know way more than I want to about the car buying process. And that means I also know how to get a good deal. And that's also why I'm uniquely qualified to tell you how easy it is to find the Perfect car on Cars.com Cars.com has the tools and expert advice to help you figure out what vehicle is right for you. Their site is super easy to use, and their advanced search filters allow you to filter over 2 million new and used cars to find the exact car that you're looking for. Every review is written by a real person reflecting a real life experience. That's how you know you can trust the dealerships. On cars.com cars.com features transparent deal ratings, including tools and badges to help shoppers understand the price of a vehicle and find the best deal. Finding a good deal is pretty important, and by understanding how a car's price compares to others in the area, Cars.com will help seal the deal. So don't take any chances. Do car shopping the easy way. Start your search with cars.com where to next?

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[Chelsea Handler]

Tell me what you are surprised about in your role as a mother. What surprises you about you as a mother?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Oh, that's a really good question. I think it has to do more maybe with my relationship like with Charlie as a parent as well. And he sort of is like the one where like our son recently got everyone has big like crazy curly hair right now, but our son is really into jiu jitsu. So our son got his head shaved and it can like it was getting pinned when he was trying to spar or whatever they do. And he got it buzzed. And he got it buzzed way too short. And he was like I'm like bald. Like this isn't a buzz. This is like I'm bald. And he was like please don't make me like please don't make me go to school tomorrow. And my take is like, and boys,

[Chelsea Handler]

haircuts are so important right now at 14. More important than they've ever been historically.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah, they are like they have that

[Chelsea Handler]

thing where they all wear like, what was it?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

They're getting like perms.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah. And then they all have this thing where they put throw their hair up like, like shaken. No, it just looks crazy. But they all have to have that haircut. And then. Yeah. All my friends who have teenage boys. It's a serious situation.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

This is the first time I've heard a story like this.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. So Russell was like, I'm gonna do something different. Cause I want it for, like, myself, which is great. I'm like, I love that autonomy, doing what works for you. And then it got just like. Like, skin, head shaved, you know? And he was like, I cannot go to school today. Like this. And I was like, I don't know. Like, suck it up. Like, if it's fucking hard to be a person sometimes, you know? And Charlie was like, please don't make him go to school. And then I was like, oh, I need to soften. Like, I am a little bit more of the. Like, no, buck up. Like. But that's how I am with myself, you know? And Charlie's better, I think, at sometimes just being like, it's okay. Like, it's okay to miss a day of school if you're not here.

[Chelsea Handler]

So did you end up letting him stay home?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Which is fine.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I think it's interesting the way that every, like, people parent. And I don't mean just people who have kids, because obviously there's plenty of people out there who play a parenting role in other people's lives. But, like, the things you would do for yourself are different than the things that the standards you set for others. You know, just, like, you would tolerate certain behaviors in, say, relationships, romantic relationships that you would never tolerate for, like, your sister or your cousin or your best friend, you know, like, sometimes we treat ourselves so harshly, it's not equal to the way that we want other people to go through the world.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes. I mean, I do let him speak to me in ways that, like, if anyone else spoke to me in that way. And sometimes he will say something to me, and I will look at Charlie like. And he's like, let it go. Let it go.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

And I'm like, especially growing up in the south, it's like, you respect your elders and you don't talk to adults in a certain way.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Smacked, you know? And I'm like, I don't smack him. So, like, I don't know how to parent this right now. And. And Charlie's just really good at being like, it's just like, fucking raging hormones. Just let it go. He'll move through it. And I'm like, but will I move through it? Because guess who else has raging hormones right now?

[Chelsea Handler]

So being a woman right now, it's in of itself a raging hormone.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

It is.

[Chelsea Handler]

It doesn't matter what age you are, it is a raging hormone. To be a woman in this world, watching everything go by, you're just like. It feels like we should be doing something, but nobody ever seems to know exactly what we should be doing.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I know, but I do like how I feel. Like I came up in a time. Like, I moved out to LA in 2001 from.

[Chelsea Handler]

From New York.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

So I went to Mississippi to school in Texas because my parents told me I had to stay below the Mason Dixon line and on the east side of Texas if I wanted help with college. So I wanted to study acting. So I went to Southern Methodist University, which had, like, a good acting program. And then I got cast in a play right out of college. So I moved to Santa Maria, California, and did plays there. And in Solvang.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, I've been Solvang.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Do you know they have that little theater, Swedish.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's Swedish town, right? Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

So I was doing. Yeah. Or Danish, because they had Danishes or whatever.

[Chelsea Handler]

Clogs.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Oh, yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, okay. I thought it was Swedish. Good to know.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I mean, I don't know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Who knows? They could have some huge rivalry, the

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Swedes and the Danes of their, like, teeny tiny towns in California and like, central California. Yeah. And I was talking about coming up as a woman, though, like, in that time and the way that, like, we loved watching, like, Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, like, burn their lives to the ground on reality television and Anna Nicole Smith. And like, this is what we were watching. And we just, like, loved watching these women, like, destroy themselves for us, you know? And it was very. Not like we're pulling each other up and we're supporting each other. Like, there's only one place at the table, bitch, so get the fuck out of my way. And I do feel that there's been a shift in that. And I don't think it's just. Cause we're getting older and we realize that there's more stuff, space. I think women now, young women, too, and girls are like, there's as much space for us as anyone else. And if there's not, we'll build our own table, as they say.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's been like this for so long. But why are we all finding out about it at the. It feels like it's. There's like a cascade of. Not like. You know what I mean, that we're all finding out about it at the same time. But this has been happening for eons and hundreds of years, yet this feels like A turning point. It's like a dump of information where women can't look away. And women have finally looked at each other and been like, we're safe together. We're safer together than we are apart. And this whole divisiveness, what you're talking about, there's only room for one person at the table. I can totally relate to that as a standup comedian. Coming up, like, 25 years ago in comedy, it was like, there was never two girls. There's always one girl, you know, And I was just like, what? You know, and women were out to get other women. And there's definitely has been a shift because there's been an understanding now that, like, men are not trustworthy. Obviously not all men. I have to say this all the time because they're so sensitive. But, you know, women are now understanding that the tide rises together. Like, it's better for us to stick together. So I wonder what that timing is, you know, like, what was the event that kind of, like, broke the dam of this knowledge? Or is this every generation? And is it. You get to a certain age and you realize, oh, God, we've been fed all this garbage.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Right.

[Chelsea Handler]

You know, is it an age thing, or is it something that's actually happening right now?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Right. Yeah. I mean, the MeToo movement was such a big, like, cultural.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. And then that repercussion of that was overturning Roe v. Wade. Right?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

That was their answer to that. Like, you want to bitch and moan about being sexually assaulted, then we're going to take away your rights.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yep.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I guess we're seeing it in real time. I feel like our genera. How old are you?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I'm 46, if you don't mind my asking.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm 51. So I just feel like in our generation, we've been through so much, and it's not like, you know, I don't have a wonderful life, and you have a wonderful life, and you have a wonderful life. But it's just been so much of, like, oh, it was very idyllic, being young and unknowledgeable. It was kind of nice to not know about all of this. And then with the technology age, you know, we went from, like, you know, we were there when there was no computer and there was no cell phone. I have my cell phone number from when I was 19 years old. I have the same number. That's when cell phones happened. And then now we're dealing with. We're at the outset of AI, and you're like, we have to deal with another whole major shift. So it's a lot for us. And I wonder if every generation feels this way, because certainly women in the 50s and 60s, if they were as frustrated. Well, the 50s, more 40s and 50s, if they were as frustrated as we are, they surely didn't tell anybody about it or get. Get organized.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

About it.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

You know, I mean. Yeah. I guess there's the question of, like, safety and also, like, how it. Like, the patriarchal ideas, like, infuse themselves into your own brain so you can't even see what's going on when you're so inside of the system, you know? But my grandmother is 99 years old. She lives in Louisiana.

[Chelsea Handler]

Wow.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And when I do get overwhelmed with, like, no one's ever had it as bad as me, I'm like, oh, right, the depression. That was bad. That was bad. And, like, you know, going to war, like, and when people were, like, actually having to go to war. And it's nice to, like, pull back and get a little bit of perspective and be like, there have always been been issues, but maybe we just know about them more now because everyone has their own little news broadcasting system in

[Katherine Elizabeth]

their pocket, telling you the worst things that are happening at every moment all the time.

[Chelsea Handler]

Although, so there's also so much more history and knowledge available to us because

[Katherine Elizabeth]

of the technology, and we have the context.

[Chelsea Handler]

And it's not like. No, I don't want to imply that there weren't women doing things. Of course there were. I mean, there was Gloria Steinem, and before her, obviously, the list can go on and on. So there was obviously activists, But I guess now we're just. We have so much information about all the things that weren't told, being told, and people are communicating. And I think that's actually gonna end up, in the long run, being such a great thing, being able to have that kind of level of communication. You know what I mean? Cause it's. Even though there's so much false information, it's hard to be lied to when you have access to the truth. I know how to get to the truth.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

And media literacy to, like, know. To check for the truth when you see something.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. To know that when a whale is jumping onto a sailboat, that that's not real.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

That's AI. I'm like, is it not real? I mean. Cause whales, like, are eating people and then spitting them out. Like, I don't know what whales are doing. They're playing salmon as.

[Chelsea Handler]

Did you ever read Moby Dick?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I don't think I actually Ever read?

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, read. When I read Moby Dick, I was very young when I read it. My dad forced me to read it and I, the whole time I was like, if whales are so smart, why aren't they fucking getting pissed off at all these people harpooning them? These guys are in these little mirrors. They are, yes. Well, I was gonna get to that. Okay, they're in these little narrow boats, okay, at like the turn of the century or the late 1800s, they're in these little narrow boats and they're going out with harpoons, literally to get the oil from the whales harpooning them. And I'm like, all the whales have to do is pop up, you know what I mean, and tip them all over. And then they're fucking. And they don't do that. They don't do that. They do. But now, a hundred years later, now they're getting pissed off and now they're like acting. So what's that, do you think?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I mean, there is a lot of evidence that animals can communicate with their young and even like tell them stories. Like, crows will do this.

[Chelsea Handler]

I believe that's true for sure.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Someone will. Like, there's this documentary where a guy puts on like a weird mask and he's like, mean to the crows and then goes back several generations later. And like the baby crows that were, you know, born after this knew that this person in this mask was a bad person. Like, they communicate. Like they described this person to their young and like they knew that this was a bad person.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

They'll hold a grudge.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yeah, whales are even smarter.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

My dog barks at crows in our backyard and I'm like, you don't want to do that, buddy. You don't want to piss off a crow.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

You could be training them to bring you money or shiny things.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I'm screaming at them,

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[Chelsea Handler]

access to a lot of things that most people don't.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

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[Chelsea Handler]

get a new car. Where do you start Car shopping can be, honestly, a little overwhelming, but it should be fun. Buying your next car should be exciting. And it can be. And if you can remember one thing, it's cars.com My dad was a used car salesman, so I know way more than I want to about the car buying process. And that means I also know how to get a good deal. And that's also why I'm uniquely qualified to tell you how easy it is to find the Perfect car on Cars.com Cars.com has the tools and expert advice to help you figure out what vehicle is right for you. Their site is super easy to use, and their advanced search filters allow you to filter over 2 million new and used cars to find the exact car that you're looking for. Every review is written by a real person, reflecting a real life experience. That's how you know you can trust the dealerships on cars.com cars.com features transparent deal ratings, including tools and badges to help shoppers understand the price of a vehicle and find the best deal. Finding a good deal is pretty important, and by understanding how a car's price compares to others in the area, Cars.com will help seal the deal. So don't take any chances. Do car shopping the easy way. Start your search with cars.com where to next ever been at the pharmacy counter and the pharmacist asks, do you have any questions? And suddenly your mind goes blank? That's exactly why you need to listen to beyond the Script from CVS Pharmacy and iHeartMedia. Hosted by Dr. Jake Goodman, this podcast brings you real conversations with CVS pharmacists. I need to get on this the health experts you see most answering the questions you wish you'd asked, like which medications might not mix well, which vaccines should you consider before a big trip? And even those questions you were too embarrassed to say out loud. Each episode busts myths, decodes health trends, and gives you practical, trustworthy advice straight from the people behind the counter. No white coats, no lectures. Just real talk, real answers, and maybe a few laughs. Listen to beyond the script on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You're probably hearing a lot about longevity right now. I know I am. And I know I care about it. And when it comes to skin, aging is linked with a decline in cellular energy. As that energy decreases, skin doesn't regenerate or renew itself as efficiently. And that's when you start to see

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

dullness, fine lines, and loss of firmness.

[Chelsea Handler]

Obagi Medical has been trusted by dermatologists for over 35 years. Their newly launched facial serum, New gen cellular renewal serum, is powered by NAD and supports skin's natural renewal processes at the skin cell level. In clinical testing, skin appeared up to

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six years younger after 12 weeks.

[Chelsea Handler]

Learn [e-mail] and new customers can use code Chelsea15 for 15% off qualifying orders. Terms apply. I'm glad you're in therapy because we are therapists here.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Oh, great.

[Chelsea Handler]

People call in and there's real people.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Okay, Are you ready for advice, to give advice?

[Chelsea Handler]

Do we need our headphones yet?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Not quite yet because we're gonna do a quickie first. So Marcia says my best friend is overly cautious with her new baby. The baby's eight months old and they held her constantly for the first time, first seven months of her life. Afraid if they didn't, she'd need a helmet. Like, other than naps. They hold her. Once she called me. This is the friend. She once called me to hold the baby for 15 minutes while she took a work call so she didn't put the baby down. They're also not taking her out of the house and have made plans with us multiple times and canceled at the last minute because they're afraid of her getting a cold.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Can I tell them?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

They're being too extra.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. You just have to every time, right? I mean, I'm happy to.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I think as a parent, you should go first.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I. So I had, like, pretty gnarly postpartum depression, and I didn't realize that that's what it was while it was happening, actually. I guess as far as postpartum goes, mine wasn't that gnarly. But I. I didn't want to leave the house. I didn't want anyone to look at my baby. I didn't want anyone to touch my baby. I didn't want to leave the house. I felt like every time I stood up, I was going to, like, slip in breast milk and drop him and his head was going to explode like a watermelon. Like, these were the things. So I understand how the French is feeling. And also having a 14 year old now, there comes a certain point where, like, you have to realize that you gotta just let go a little and let this person become their own person, right? That, like, you can't be in control of whether they're gonna get a cold or not for the rest of their lives. And you won't be able to make their decisions for them forever. So, I mean, I think. I think it's maybe A little extra.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

And.

[Chelsea Handler]

But do you. What's your. Like, yes, it's definitely extra, but what's your opinion on telling another parent about that?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I feel like, especially now, it's, like, so taboo to say anything to anyone about.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, it's a taboo, though.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I mean, it's just frowned upon, I should say. Frowned upon.

[Chelsea Handler]

Is it? Yeah, I mean. Cause it's kind of individual. Like, if you're willing to give somebody advice or if you think you're just gonna give out unsolicited advice, it's kind of like, what's your vibe in the friendship? Like, yeah, it's definitely extra. It sounds ridiculous, but is it your place?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Right?

[Chelsea Handler]

And also with all the postpartum stuff, like, I was gonna say postpartum shit. I'm like, don't say that. With all the postpartum, like, everyone. I mean, it's so much more common than anybody ever knew about. Because, once again, it's a women's issue that nobody was discussing freely because there was shame around it, and people felt like they were failing at doing something, which is being a mother. And nobody wants to talk about that because it has nothing to do with failing. It has to do with a hormonal imbalance and all the other things that come with that. So, like, what's the point? You know, they're gonna figure it out at some point that that's too much or not necessary, or they won't figure it out, and you're just gonna have to tolerate it. But I think also. I think being a really good friend is kind of tolerating people when they're at their lowest.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

But maybe also just being like, hey, I couldn't help but notice that, like, you seem. It seems scary to you to, like, leave the house with the baby. If I went with you somewhere, like, can I go with you to, like, a place? Because that's what I had a doula who came after to help and a postpartum doula. And she was like, we're going to a restaurant today. And I was like, but what if somebody wants to look at my baby? She's like, they can look at your baby. I'm like, but then what if they want to touch him? She's like, you're allowed to say, no, you can't touch my baby. It's your. He's your baby. You know, so maybe the friend could offer. Like, if I just am noticing that it's hard for you to get out, if I went with you, is that something that you would be interested in?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I like that. I'm noticing language like that feels very gentle.

[Chelsea Handler]

I like that. I think that feels very gentle. By the way, look how nice your legs look in the camera.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Just. Thank you.

[Chelsea Handler]

This is a little off topic, but you went from postpartum. Fourteen years later, look at you now.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

She can't stop picking.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Well, because you're kickboxing, right?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

You're doing that all the time.

[Chelsea Handler]

Are you really? Are you into kickboxing? Really?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. With a trainer who are like actually gonna hit me in the face.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

No, thank you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you get a lot? I know I don't want to get hit in the face. I didn't even want. I was just in Istanbul and they were. There was. They were. The guy I was with wanted to go to Hamam and I was like. Once I found out they splashed water on you, he came back from the first one. He goes, I don't think you're gonna like it. And I was like, why? And he's like, cause they splash water on your face. I'm like, no, I don't like that.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

No, no.

[Chelsea Handler]

I want to splash my water on my face. And I don't even want to splash my own water.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Don't touch my face.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't want to be splashed at all. So I've been noticing that's a good, that's a good advice. That's a good segue into advice all the time. Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And to be like, here's a suggestion and if you don't want to take it, be like, okay, yeah, I tried.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

And especially now it's getting warmer. Maybe you guys can hang out outdoors together and like, you know, in the backyard so it's open air, all that good stuff.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Well, we have some women who are just making some big life decisions.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, great. I love life decisions.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

This is, this is really good.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Good.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

So our first caller is Kevin. And Kevin is she her. She says, dear Chelsea, I'm a 32 year old single woman from the Pacific Northwest. I've been boy crazy since I was five and I was always in a relationship.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I hear you.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I was always in a relationship. Throughout high school, college and my twenties. I ended my last serious relationship, a five year partnership. In 2022. I moved back into my hometown and spent a long, messy period grieving with a few half hearted flings along the way. Almost a year later, I'm finally feeling more like myself. I'm motivated to date with intention, but I also know I get infatuated easily. So I'm easing back in by getting on hinge and going out more. I'm in a very unfulfilling phase of my life right now. I'm living at home with my parents, working part time as a barista and trying to figure out where I belong career wise as an ADHD millennial. I know I'm still young, but I'm scared of ending up in a job I hate. And I'm equally scared of getting stuck in my hometown where I have zero desire to. To settle. So right now, I just feel stuck. I want to get back into dating and being social, but it feels hard to do that authentically from where I'm currently at. So my question for Chelsea is, how do you tell the difference between fear and intuition when you're craving a big life change? And more specifically, am I avoiding dating in my hometown because I'm afraid it will root me here? Or is my intuition telling me that this isn't the right environment or the right version of myself to build a relationship from?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Kevin.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Hi.

[Chelsea Handler]

Hi, Kevin.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Hi.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

How's it going?

[Chelsea Handler]

Good. How are you? This is our special guest. Mary Elizabeth Ellis is here today.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Hi, Kevin. Hi.

[Caller/Guest]

Nice to meet you.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

It's nice to meet you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Fear. That's interesting. Fear and intuition, like, those two words don't correlate for me, but I get what you're saying, but, yeah, it was

[Caller/Guest]

hard for me to figure out the words.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so. Well, I mean, it sounds like you're in a transitional phase in your life.

[Caller/Guest]

Yes, absolutely. I feel like I'm always in a transitional phase of my life. And so I'm just trying to figure out, like, how do I get out of this cycle? And I've just. I've already done so many different things before, so I was just like, do I want to go back to do what I know, go with what I know, or do I need to really, like, put myself out there and do something drastically different?

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't know. Okay, well, first things first. A, I'm glad you're happy and safe and you live with your parents. Cause everything's fine. Like now you have. That's a great sound, like jumping off board, you know, like, that's good. That's a good thing.

[Caller/Guest]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

From what you said about being infatuated with boys since you were 5 years old, I understand what you mean by infatuation, and I think if you recognize that about yourself, this is a perfect moment for you to take a break from boys. When you are in a transitional phase, it's kind of like putting gasoline on a Fire. Even though you're not in a fire, it's like you're adding something to the mix that doesn't need to be in the mix right now. You know what I mean? You should take this time, reclaim this time, use it to focus on yourself. Use this time where you're not paying rent and you're figuring out what you're gonna do career wise and professionally and just take that all in and like, you're so lucky. You get to live with your parents during this time that can help you financially. You don't have to pay rent. You can sit, you know you're safe. Again, like, these are all good things to like form a foundation for the next step that you do take. So I think you should figure out what makes you feel excited about the future. Like, what are the job options for you? What have you done that you've loved, loved, not just like, to get by. What actually, like, inspires you?

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, it's so hard. I feel like there's so many different things that inspire me and I love to do. I like to do different things. I like to keep it interesting. I get very sick and tired of doing the same thing all over and over again. So, like right now I'm a part time barista and I love doing that, but only part time. If after like yesterday was my Friday and I was already like, like at my wit's ends with everyone, my social battery's so low. And so I'm like, this is great. I love that it's a job that I could enjoy, but I like being able to do something else to kind of refuel my, I guess, my desires and inspirations. And so that's what that was always event planning. And so I've jumped around different event planning jobs with like catering, but that's also kind of an industry I kind of want to get away from. But there's still so many aspects of from it that I want to still do, like creating and planning. I'm up for a position at the dealership that I work at. I work inside a dealership where there's a cafe. It's a weird setup, like a car dealership.

[Chelsea Handler]

What kind of dealership?

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, like a Toyota dealership. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah. So it's like, it's right off the freeway. We have like tons of people coming in and there's no breakfast places in our town either. So a lot of regulars come in. And so that's always really fun. And then there's a position available where I could be kind of like an Executive admin and be also like their like employer relations manager and plan like their holiday parties or plan like other like social and like employee engagements and also get involved with like marketing and other like community events. So I've always been interested in like event planning in some sort of or like production managing in some way or form to like bring people together. So that's always what's inspired me is I've always kind of considered myself like I want to be like the soccer mom of a company, but I feel like that's a very, very specific, very hard position to find. It's kind of like I feel like those type of positions are created for someone that is already like in you know, the place that they work at or they like have someone that they know they could fill that role. So that one is kind of up in the air. But also I'm also scared of if I take that position, am I going to get stuck at my hometown?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Now is there a position that is available to you that already has those things or that doesn't exist yet in your hometown?

[Caller/Guest]

Not really. That's like this is like the only position that's closest to what I'm kind of what I, what I'm interested in doing.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

I mean to me that sounds like a position that's something that you create for yourself, like starting spreading the word. I'm starting an event planning company sort of thing. And then also focus on the parts of it you like that are creative, that are moving the project forward, that are organizational. And then when you run into things that are not in your wheelhouse or you find very draining, that's when you bring in somebody else even on a really part time basis to help you with those projects. And it can be like a project to project basis as well. And this is a good place for you to like feel out if you really love it because you are living at home and you do have some flexibility. And then if you do want to continue doing that, you can take that to the town that you actually want to be living in. And you've already established a company, a rapport, that sort of thing, your systems, all that.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, I have a couple friends that have said I should start my own business. And so that's kind of like I've always thought I'm doing that. I always thought I'd do that way later in life after I had family and kids. But I don't have a boyfriend, I don't have kids yet. So it's like, why not just do it right now? I Do have this opportunity of living at home for free. But I guess that's kind of like, am I holding myself back? Am I kind of scared to do it because I'm gonna fall in love with it? Or is it something that I should just go for and what's the worst that can happen?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I think if you have the ability to take a big leap in, like what you're passionate about and you don't have any financial constraints in the moment because you have this situation, you should take it. Like, I can see your ADHD at work. Like, you need a lot of things to keep you occupied and that's a good thing. That's not a negative. That means you can pay attention to a lot of different things at the same time. That's why you have a lot of different interests. And that's why you can go work as a barista like that and also want to event coordinate. But you could also, there's also options, like if you like event coordinating or like you say you want to be like, you know, the soccer mom of a company. Like, if you're a wedding planner, you're dealing with different clients all the time. So like, that's kind of even more fun for somebody with a brain like yours, you know what I mean? Because you're not dealing with the same people over and over again. Or if you're planning events, like, I don't know, whatever, bat mitzvahs, sweet sixteens, whatever kind of like, you know, event planning company that you get in bed with, you can then you kind of keep the ball rolling, you know what I mean? Being at one company and planning events for one company, I feel like might get born boring for you.

[Caller/Guest]

And that's what I thought I wanted. But now that you're the way you're describing, it's like, maybe I will get bored of it. So I don't know. And like, I have done weddings, I've helped with weddings for years and I have a very love hate relationship with weddings. But something like, of that nature, like maybe working for like multiple different companies and doing like different projects for them. I guess.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Caller/Guest]

So I mean.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yeah, I want to circle back too to the dating question. Like, does it feel like dating something that she should put.

[Chelsea Handler]

I think you should focus on your career. I really think the most important thing for young women to do is to stop worrying about who you're going to end up with. You're going to find that person. There's a million people in this world. I mean, there's 9 billion people, actually, in this world, you're going to find somebody, and there's plenty of them to go around. You're going to have several different loves in your life that will happen.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

You'll probably have several different careers in your life, too. I just want to name the. Since we're talking about naming things, that idea of being stuck. Life is nothing but change, so you probably won't get stuck somewhere. If you're the type of person who doesn't want to get stuck somewhere, you'll. You'll be able to get yourself into a new thing that makes you excited no matter where you land. And most people change jobs, and a lot of people change relationships throughout their life.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, that's good advice.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

So you don't have to land there now and, like, feel like you're in cement, you know, but, you know, like,

[Chelsea Handler]

take steps in, like, one direction. Use, like, the energy and, like, the motivation that you have right now. Harness that and move in the direction of either starting your own company or, you know, reaching doing some outreach to the people that you do know, saying, hey, I'm starting this thing where I'm gonna put events together. It could be for company. It could be for a bridal shower. It could be for whatever, you know, like, create. Start taking steps to create that for yourself and see if that's something that fulfills you and that you can get off on its feet while you live with your parents. And in the meantime, keep your barista job so you have some sort of income, you know? And then, like, you're gonna learn so much so quickly with whatever choice you make about what you like and what you don't like. So just have faith in yourself, you know, like, that you're capable and that you can do this and what your interests are. The most important thing is to know what you're interested in, and you have a lot of interest. You just said them all.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah. Yeah, definitely.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Caller/Guest]

I think that's a great way to put it. Thank you so much.

[Chelsea Handler]

So don't look at everything as, like, a negative. Like, just flip the switch on it and literally, like, flip the script. Like, you're like, oh, I could do anything I want. The world is my oyster. I'm living with my parents. I don't. This is my opportunity of a lifetime to go after what you want.

[Caller/Guest]

Thank you so much, Chelsea. Appreciate it.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

All right.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay.

[Caller/Guest]

Definitely makes me feel a lot better about my position. Thank you, guys. Nice to meet you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Nice to meet you, too. Bye.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Bye.

[Chelsea Handler]

I remember growing up and, like, when I Moved to LA thinking I was like, I just wanted to live with my parents again, and I didn't want to live with them the entire 18 years that I did. I didn't want anything to do with my parents. And as soon as I got to la, I'm like, it would really be nice to live with my parents. It's so funny how that happens.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

You know, grass is always greener. I also think that, like, 27 to 35, even, like, early 30s, it's such a. You put so much pressure on yourself to, like, get to the thing, and it's like, okay to just be like. It is a transitional period. You always say this, like, things never stay the same. They never stay the way they are.

[Chelsea Handler]

They don't. And so, yeah, even the good things and the bad things, they don't stay the same. And once you realize that, you're like, you just. That has to be, like, a mantra, I think that people tell themselves because people get so worried about being stuck. Or like, what if I'm. I remember when I was waiting tables before, like, I became successful, I would just think, what if I'm a waitress forever? What if I'm a waitress forever? What if I'm a waitress when I'm 40? What if I'm a waitress when I'm 50? You know, like, I was like, what do I do then? What's gonna happen then? And it's like that narrative, it becomes kind of, like, pathological. And then you're telling yourself this negative story for no reason. There's no proof that you're gonna be doing this forever. Just like, there's no proof that you're not gonna be doing this forever. It could go any way.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

It's like, yeah, well, our next caller is Dominique. And she says, Dear Chelsea, I'm 29 and I'm writing from a big moment of transition. And this next line is just, like, sort of weird coincidence. But she says, I've spent the last nine years building a career in events. I'm good at it, I've worked hard, and on paper it all makes sense. But lately I feel stalled, like I've reached the edge of what this version of my life can offer unless I either expand it radically or walk away. At the same time, I'm newly married and staring down a parallel question that feels just as existential. Do I double down on ambition or do I step into motherhood knowing that either choice reshapes everything. How do you know when it's time to outgrow a life you built with care? Instead of clinging to it because it's familiar. And how do you make big life decisions when there's no obvious right order to do things? Dominique.

[Chelsea Handler]

Ooh. Hi, Dominique complex. Hi, Dominique. Can you expand a little bit on your career? Like, what do you do? And where are you with that?

[Caller/Guest]

So I work in event marketing, and I started doing tours for bands in the Christian music world and then did, like, philanthropic stuff. And now I'm in, like, the corporate kind of event marketing space where I do, you know, events for people who use certain products or digital products. I get to travel a lot. I built something really cool from, like, I don't have a college degree, which is awesome. And so that's where I'm at. I'm just trying to figure out whether I, like, I'm like, okay, I'm in the constitute of, like, grow or die. Like, if I'm not, you know, keep. If I'm not, like, you know, growing constantly and like, okay, something next, something new is up. So that's kind of where I'm at right now.

[Chelsea Handler]

And do you feel maybe we should put her in contact with our last caller? Because she could just take over your business if you're not interested anymore.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Our last caller was, like, trying to start an events planning business, and we were like, yeah, go for it. So it might be nice to chat

[Chelsea Handler]

with her and tell her, yeah, we might want to. Catherine may want to connect you afterwards just in case you need some help. But, I mean, first of all, like, that I like your growth mindset, but, like, not every period is a period of growth. Sometimes you are just kind of, like, hunkering down with what you have. Like, there's a planting and there's a harvest, and sometimes you're planting, and then sometimes you're harvesting. And that's, like, you don't always have to feel like we live in the society that makes us feel like we have to run around in circles to get shit done or to be productive. But there is a lot of strength in just enjoying what you've built. It sounds like you've built a pretty great business for yourself. So. And I guess my next question is, why would becoming a mother. Why is there a choice between the two? Do you think that you can't do both?

[Caller/Guest]

I think it's definitely harder. And I definitely, you know, when I choose to become a mother, it's like, I want to be all into that. So I feel like what I'm building in my career will definitely take the backseat to, like, you know, you know, growing a person and being involved in their lives and every aspect of that.

[Chelsea Handler]

So.

[Caller/Guest]

So maybe not it's one or the other, but one will definitely take a back seat. You know what I'm saying?

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, then we should definitely introduce her to the woman we were just talking to, because she can run your business. She can help run your business. I don't want you as a woman and as a black woman, to build a business and then just give up on it. I just don't want that for you. I want you to be able to do all of this, and you can. You can do all of this, and you can start a family and do that, too.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah. And you're right. Like, one thing takes a bit backseat for a little while. Like, when you're pregnant, you can do both things pretty easily. But then when the baby comes out, you normally want, like, some time to, like, nest and be home. But then also, when I had a newborn, I was like, oh, my God, is this who I am? A mother? I don't only want to be a mother. I still want to be an actor. I still want to be a professional, you know, and. And then I got a chance to do that again. So, yeah, I think it's true. There's seasons to things, but there's space for everything.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, there is space for everything. And I think I would hate for you to have a child go 100% into that and then go, I can't believe I don't have my business anymore. You know, when you do need some time to yourself, when you do need some different identity other than just mom or wife, you're gonna look back and be like, what am I, God? You had a robust business. Like, please don't give up on that aspect. Like, I think that is really, like, the Paramount issue here. You built something that you're proud of, and we are gonna put you in touch with this other woman we just spoke to. Whether it's a match or not, you're gonna find somebody to help you run your business so that you can get ready for the next phase of your life, which is motherhood, whenever you feel that's ready. But you have to find kind of a business partner, and they don't have to be, like, 50, 50 partner, because you did build this business, so it's yours. But somebody that you can hire that can help manage things is not an unreasonable thing to do. So. So, yeah, I really just want to get you away from that thinking. It's not one or the other. It's, how do I do it all because we can do more than one thing at the same time.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And remembering that, you don't have to make the decision for the end point. As you go down the path, you'll get new information. And as new information comes in, then you get to make a different decision based on. Oh, I didn't even see that part. Now here's this new part.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yeah. And how long have you been married, Dominique?

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

Monique?

[Caller/Guest]

I've been married a year in May. This May.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

So, okay, you got time. You've got time to just enjoy being married, but enjoy your success.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, that's really important. Like independent women and business creators, like, people who are business owners. That is very viable and valuable. So don't just be ready to toss that aside. You know what I mean? It's important what you've done. And so take your time, enjoy it, and then just look for options. I get you want to grow your business. That doesn't have to happen every six months. It happens over a long period of time. So it sounds like you already know what you're doing and that your life is pretty good. So just figure out ways to make it even better and do all the things that you want.

[Caller/Guest]

Do all the things. I got it. That's all. That's great advice, actually. And it's good to just maybe sit back or to hang tight and be like, okay, I've done this. Just maybe chill for a minute. Just revel in that for a second. So thank you. I appreciate that.

[Chelsea Handler]

The best periods of my professional and personal life are when I've come back from breaks, when I've come back from running on a hamster wheel, when I've said, this is enough. I'm getting out of here. I have to stop it. I have to take a time out. When I come back from that are the best, biggest growth spurts and successes. So keep that in mind. You don't always have to be running like this.

[Caller/Guest]

Totally.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Great advice.

[Chelsea Handler]

Great. I'm glad you called in, Dominique.

[Caller/Guest]

Yes. Thank you guys so much.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I was saying this even just yesterday to Charlie, like, or it might have been this morning. Like, it's so nice to get, like, a little bit older and not feel like I have to have that hustle that I had when I was in my 20s and my 30s, you know?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. And I like what you said about you're always getting new information and not setting an end point because. Cause I think as a young person, we're so attached to the outcome of things. That's why defeats or failures or what we categorize as such feel so much bigger than they actually are is because we are so tied to the outcome of success. Like that's the definition. Like this. If I get this then that will mean that. Or if I'm with this guy or even a breakup can feel like such a big failure. And it's like as you get older you realize like it's really all depends on how you handle those failures. It really has nothing to do with the failure itself. It's like what do you do after the failure?

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

And it's that like pullback too. Right. Of like you think you're like in a low point, but actually you've climbed this high on the mountain and you're just in a little dip before you keep going up. Right?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

You pull back a little.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

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[Chelsea Handler]

Okay, do we have a closing?

[Katherine Elizabeth]

We do.

[Chelsea Handler]

A little whoopsie to close with it

[Katherine Elizabeth]

is a little whoopsie.

[Sponsor/Advertiser Voice]

It's.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

It's a little bit of a heavier one. It's a little bit of a heavier one. But because you're on this show, which tackles so much of the sandwich generation stuff with like moms and you know, dads too. Parents who have their kids, their kids, lives, their own lives, work, and then also taking care of an aging parent. I thought this would be a good question. So Jody says. Dear Chelsea, my husband is one of three sons, all of whom are married and live somewhat far from their parents. We're the closest, two hours away. We see each other fairly frequently, but with kids and activities and lives, it's tough. It became clear years ago that my mother in law's health was declining. Specifically we were noticing signs of what we were concerned could be a dementia. Forgetting things, using the wrong names for people, walking into the wrong house. She began having issues driving, hitting mailboxes and curbs. And then about two years ago, she totaled her car by hitting a guardrail. Real luckily no one was hurt. While we all knew something was happening, my father in law has been in denial. He constantly downplays her symptoms and even refused to stop her from driving for almost a year following the accident. Thankfully, she's now stopped. Things have gotten much worse this past year to the point where he can't deny something is wrong. She falls regularly. She can't really walk on her own without help. Every time we see her, she's got a bruise or a scrape from a fall and she can never tell us how it happened. And he only sometimes, sometimes can. We've all come to terms with the fact that she has somewhat some advanced neurologic diagnosis, but we don't know what because he hasn't taken her to the doctor. This has been sad to acknowledge, but our biggest concern is both of their safety. Any advice on how to push for acceptance and help with a boomer who's very unwilling to acknowledge or accept help? Jody?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, you have to take her to the doctor yourself. Yeah, you got to get in there and take her to the doctor and intervene. He's not going to do it. He's in denial. And men are used to. So you have to go in and do that. You have to get your brothers together in solidarity or do it yourself. But take her to the doctor for a diagnosis, that's it. And like, sorry, dad, you're not acting responsibly right now and you're in denial and this is dangerous now where I'm concerned about my mother's safety and I'm concerned about your safety.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yeah.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

And I would also potentially reach out to either an elder law attorney or someone who works in like healthcare for the aging because they would be able to give you some tools and stuff in your state, it may be time for like a guardianship or conservatorship, something like that. Maybe time for them to move to, like an assisted living where, you know, he can have some help with activities of daily living. She can have a lot more help, whatever they need. But definitely start reaching out to someone in your community who is able to give you some answers about laws and regulations and things in your state.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, but get the ball rolling on getting a diagnosis also. Like, that's first and foremost. Find out what the diagnosis is and then you have proof of a reason why they need to move into an assisted living facility or a retirement community. But yeah, that's very common that people are in denial about their spouses. Like, decline.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Yes, agreed. And if it's your husband's mother and their three sons, I agree. Make the sons get together and tell them it's what they're meant to do. They have to do it. It's their job.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Well, on that upbeat note, we are wrapping it up. Thank you so much for being here. It was wonderful to meet you. Yeah, you too.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

It was so fun.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thanks for having me. What a pleasure. And thanks for showing off your Sporty Spice legs.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

Thank you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Cute. That makes me want to wear shorts.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I feel like people are like, oh, you look good. And I'm like, I'm strong.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'm strong.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I could kick you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, you're a kickboxer, so you are strong. You can catch Mary Elizabeth Ellis on her show, man on the inside. You can catch her in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and of course, new Girl. If you're watching, that show's been.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

Yeah, that's an old.

[Caller/Guest]

That's an old one.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's an old show. But if you could be watching, you could be watching reruns of it.

[Mary Elizabeth Ellis]

I don't know what you're watching.

[Chelsea Handler]

Maybe she's watching reruns across the street. Who knows? Okay, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

[Katherine Elizabeth]

If you want advice from Chelsea, write in to dearchelsea podcastmail.com Dear Chelsea is a production of I Heart Media. Follow Chelsea on all socials Chelsea Handler and find Katherine on TikTok at Flash Cadabra. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brandon Dickert, executive producer Katherine Law. Find full video episodes and minisodes now on Netflix and get tickets to see Chelsea live@chelsea handler.com.

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[Chelsea Handler]

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[Chelsea Handler]

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