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Criminal Minds covers race relations...or do they? "Fear and Loathing" feints at that but instead is about how men will lure women into being murdered with promises of music stardom. Also, Reid continues to deal with his onset of drug addiction, bringing to mind that season of 24 where Jack was hooked on heroin or The French Connection II. Ronnie and Jazz will make it make sense for you as always.

The Deliver The Profile boys are back in 2026 to cover Season 2's "Revelations", which obviously is part 2 to "The Big Game"'s part 1. James Van Der Beek has Reid captive and the kid's having tragic backstory-relevant flashbacks amidst the torture. JJ freaks out on Morgan, Prentiss is a cool cucumber and Hotch definitely doesn't put himself in front of the team. Find out if Reid survives the wrath of JVDB in the latest DTP!

It's "The Big Game", because for legal reasons CBS cannot call it the Super Bowl. We can though, so fuck it. After the Super Bowl, a couple is murdered for having too many possessions. The culprit is someone named Raphael, meaning either an archangel or a ninja turtle is committing heinous crimes. This episode also shows what the BAU does in a party setting, and it's vaguely pathetic. (Reid does Star Trek trivia!) James Van Der Beek stars, Don Swayze co-stars, and Mandy Patinkin looks at drawings of birds during the Super Bowl. What more could you ask for in the HIGHEST RATED CRIMINAL MINDS IN SHOW HISTORY? Nothing, that's what.

In this episode of Criminal Minds, the BAU goes rat hunting in "Internal Affairs", even though it's a different branch of government and all the conflict about policing your own is lost. Didn't we see The Departed, anyone? This is all part of the Season 11 Dirty Dozen we are obligated to cover it eventually, but we're so darned annoyed by this storyline that we'll only give 100% instead of 110% like usual.