Meredith Marks — on revealing marital ups and downs on RHOSLC and how she disengages from the drama

Summary

Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson

Episode: Meredith Marks — On Revealing Marital Ups and Downs on RHOSLC and How She Disengages from the Drama

Release Date: November 11, 2025
Guest: Meredith Marks (Real Housewives of Salt Lake City)

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Episode Overview

In this lively and revealing episode, host Jesse Tyler Ferguson shares a meal with Meredith Marks, star of "The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City," at Bottega Louie in West Hollywood. They dive deep into Meredith’s experiences on reality TV, navigating public scrutiny around her marriage and family, dealing with drama (and self-preservation), and creatively capitalizing on her catchphrases. The conversation is candid and humorous, mixing stories from behind the scenes of Housewives with heartfelt reflections on relationships, parenting, and personal growth.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Life Before (and During) Housewives

• Initial Meeting and Show Recruitment

  • Meredith’s entry into RHOSLC was almost serendipitous—she originally thought she was being interviewed about Utah, not for a reality show.

    "I didn't know it was Housewives. I thought they were just trying to get ideas for this show and were looking to talk to people in Utah." (Meredith Marks, 10:57)

  • She had not watched Housewives before joining; she binge-watched random episodes to prepare, not fully understanding the gravity of what she was entering.

• Family Move & Balancing Business

  • The Marks family’s move from Chicago to Salt Lake City is discussed, and Meredith talks about her jewelry and caviar businesses.

2. Navigating Reality TV – Drama, Editing, and Family

• Experiencing Drama for the First Time

  • Meredith quickly realized how chaotic Housewives could be during her first all-cast event.

    “I went home to my kids...and they were like, yeah, mom, that’s what the show is.” (Meredith Marks, 09:19-09:58)

• Impact of Editing and Lack of Control

  • Jesse and Meredith both share stories about the unpredictable nature of reality TV editing, underscoring how the “power of the edit” means participants never know how they’ll be portrayed.

    “You don’t have creative control over how that all comes together.” (Jesse Tyler Ferguson, 18:28)

• “Disengaging” from Drama

  • Meredith is known for her calm, disengaged style in the thick of conflict.

    “Half of our show is how many times can we poke at Meredith until she loses her temper. Because I’m actually a pretty calm, collected human being. But when I lose it, I lose it.” (Meredith Marks, 23:15)

  • She admits the show often tries to bait her and recognizes her composure creates a challenge for castmates:

    “Maybe I just become so explosive, they’ll be trying to calm me down at all times instead of revving me up.” (Meredith Marks, 24:23)

3. Family, Parenting, and the Public Eye

• Protecting Her Children

  • Meredith and Jesse discuss the complexity of parenting in public, especially regarding her son’s coming out.

    “My middle son...he was not public about it, he was not private about it. He was still figuring it out for himself. And we had people trying to out him on social media, some castmates encouraging trolling...it was really very tough.” (Meredith Marks, 20:32)

  • She highlights the growth that comes from adversity:

    “Once you see that, like, you come out and everyone’s okay, then you can move on and reflect back. And it’s all been very positive for him in the long run. It just was a short term, not so great moment.” (Meredith Marks, 20:52)

• Modeling Behavior and Owning Mistakes

  • Jesse notes the awkwardness of having one’s less-than-best moments broadcasted:

    “You’re setting an example for your kids, but, like, they’re showing all the worst moments, all your worst moments.” (Jesse Tyler Ferguson, 22:12)

• Family Boundaries & Growth

  • Their family communicates more openly now, and privacy boundaries are critical.

4. Marriage Struggles and Reconciliation in the Spotlight

• Origin of Relationship

  • Meredith and Seth met on a proper blind date (lighthearted story involving Bulls tickets and a love triangle).

    “What happened was Seth met a friend of mine...he saw a picture of me...and started asking questions...” (Meredith Marks, 32:44-35:30)

• On Separation and Getting Back Together

  • Meredith explains their on/off separation pre-Housewives, parenting strategies, and ultimately, why marriage counseling saved their relationship.

    “We always had this excuse of the kids ... they’re not in the house anymore, do we want to be together or not? We kind of gave it a last-stitch effort...and it worked. We loved each other always, just had terrible communication.” (Meredith Marks, 26:51-27:59)

• Growth Through Openness

  • Publicly sharing struggles has helped others see that they aren’t alone.

    “Talking openly about my marital struggles, my relationship with my son...some people either are going through it, or didn’t have the supportive parent my son had...and it’s nice for them to see that.” (Meredith Marks, 24:46)

5. Perspective on Housewives Culture: Triggers, Edges, and Moving On

• Understanding and Managing Triggers

  • Family, business, marriage, legal troubles—these are the recurring sore points for the cast.

    “Lisa, it’s not hard. Her business, obviously, is a massive trigger...almost everybody’s marriage or children is going to be huge...” (Meredith Marks, 47:20)

  • Meredith is consciously choosing not to let castmates weaponize her family as a trigger anymore.

    “I have decided not to let that ever trigger me again because they weaponized it one time too many.” (Meredith Marks, 47:45)

• On Forgiveness and Boundaries

  • She prefers moving on over holding grudges:

    “Forgiveness is for me, not for you. B, when you show me who you are, I’m going to accept it and proceed accordingly.” (Meredith Marks, 45:21)

  • She accepts that dynamic shifts are inevitable, but insists on basic civility.

6. Self-Care, Delegation, and “Rumors and Nastiness”

• Mental Wellness, Delegation, Life Hacks

  • Meredith reflects on generational shifts toward mental health, with her kids (and their friends) normalizing therapy and check-ins.

• Delegation at Home and Work

  • Her daughter “gatekeeps” her assistants:

    “My daughter gatekeeps the assistance from me because she’s worried that I’m gonna overwhelm them and they’ll quit.” (Meredith Marks, 39:34)

• Entrepreneurial Moves

  • Meredith describes launching her game “Rumors and Nastiness”—riffing on her signature phrase about Housewives drama.

    “Is it a rumor or a nasty truth? There are prompts...Maybe it’s true, maybe it isn’t...You either lose and take a shot or you win and get a diamond.” (Meredith Marks, 40:49)

7. Cultural and Religious Identity

• Late-in-Life Bat Mitzvah
  • Meredith describes her adult Bat Mitzvah as meaningful, not for religious reasons, but as an affirmation of heritage, family, and identity.

8. Looking Ahead—“Endgame” and Life After Reality TV

• How Long Will Meredith Stay?
  • She initially wanted 3–5 years, aware of the diminishing-returns of overexposure.

    “After that, people have seen too much about you...you are going to be hypocritical when they go back and pull something up from five years ago. When you get to that point, you’re going past the point of positive return.” (Meredith Marks, 49:55)

  • She’ll keep going “as long as the positive outweighs the negative.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On First Experiencing Housewives Drama:

  “Mary and Jen were fighting ... and cameras were there filming it ... and they [her kids] were like, yeah, mom, that's what the show is.” (Meredith Marks, 09:30)

• On Reality TV Editing:

  “If they didn’t leave things out, it would take away from the entertainment value. Having question marks is part of what makes it interesting.” (Meredith Marks, 18:53)

• On Being Go-to for “Disengaging”:

  “When I lose it, I lose it ... half of our show is how many times can we poke at Meredith until she loses her temper.” (Meredith Marks, 23:15)

• On Parenting and Privacy:

  “It was really very tough ... once you see that, like, you come out and everyone’s okay, then you can move on and reflect back.” (Meredith Marks, 20:32)

• On Marital Struggles:

  “We loved each other always. It was just, we had terrible communication and had just pent up anger over a lot of things that could have been resolved by talking.” (Meredith Marks, 27:59)

• On Forgiveness:

  “Forgiveness is for me, not for you. When you show me who you are, I’m going to accept it and proceed accordingly.” (Meredith Marks, 45:21)

• On Triggers:

  “I have decided not to let that ever trigger me again because they weaponized it one time too many.” (Meredith Marks, 47:45)

• On Bat Mitzvah and Identity:

  “Judaism is not just, you know, a religion. For me to affirm that had a lot more to do with it just being a big part of my life and who I am and a little bit less about religion.“ (Meredith Marks, 41:47–43:12)

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Important Timestamps

• Meredith’s first Housewives experience: 09:19–09:58
• Being cast for Housewives: 10:55–11:34
• Family, parenting, and social media trolling: 20:32–22:12
• Meredith’s iconic “disengaging” philosophy: 23:15–24:23
• Discussing her marriage struggles & reconciliation: 26:46–27:59
• Blind date story with Seth: 32:44–36:15
• Family triggers and boundaries: 47:17–48:13
• Entrepreneurial ventures (“Rumors and Nastiness” game): 40:42–41:41
• Meredith on Bat Mitzvah and identity: 41:47–43:12
• Reflections on the longevity of Housewives career: 49:55–51:01

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Tone & Atmosphere

The episode is warm, playful, and candid—Jesse and Meredith balance laughter, self-deprecation, and sincerity. Both approach thorny topics with honesty and emotional intelligence, weaving real streaks of humor through the realities of fame, family, and “effortless luxury.” Jesse’s admiration for Meredith’s calm (and fashion) is clear, as is her ease at self-reflection.

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Summary Takeaways

Meredith Marks is not just a glamorous reality TV star—she’s a resilient mother, wife, and businesswoman who leverages her platform to show vulnerability on screen, set boundaries in both public and private, and amuse herself (and fans) by spinning Housewives drama into a diamond-studded party game. The episode delivers both delicious behind-the-scenes stories and genuine wisdom about navigating relationships, fame, and fragile truths in a high-pressure, highly edited world.

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For more candid celebrity dinners, tune in to Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson.

Transcript

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

The holidays are coming up, and like a lot of people, our family's already planning where we're spending Thanksgiving. It's at our house and who's bringing what pie and what kind of pie, and making sure it's the pie that everyone wants.

[Interviewer/Host]

It's.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's the whole thing. Usually with pie, I end up just buying it. Other people do it so much better than I do. And I, I. It just takes one thing off my plate. Although I did just buy a great cookbook called All About Pie. So maybe I should be brave and make my own pie this year. A lot of people, though, don't have Thanksgiving at home. They travel. They travel to loved ones. And if you're traveling this season, it might be the perfect time to think about hosting your home on Airbnb while you're away. The best part? You don't have to do it all by yourself. With Airbnb's co host network, you can team up with a local co host who can handle everything from guest communication, check ins, even sprucing things up before the next day. So while you're away making memories with family, your home is in good hands, making a few of its own. If you've been curious about hosting but don't know where to start, find a co [e-mail] host. Anyone else ever look at their dog's dinner bowl and think, oh, buddy, you deserve better than this? I feel that all the time with my two dogs, Sam, my Golden Doodle and Leaf, my tiny but mighty Morkie. I want meal time to be more than just fuel for them. It should be something exciting. I mean, yes, they do act so excited when I feed them anything, but sometimes I just think they're faking it, you know? That's why I've been eyeing Nom Nom. Their recipes are gently cooked and actually designed to engage your pup senses with textures, smells, and vibrant ingredients that keep things endlessly interesting. They've got six different recipes like Pork Potluck, Chicken Cuisine, Beef Mash, and more. And every one of them is crafted by vet nutritionalists, which gives me real peace of mind. The idea that Salmon Leaf could have meals with premium proteins and vibrant veggies cooked in small batches so the nutrients and textures stay intact. Sounds like something I' definitely want them to try. After all, I wouldn't want to eat the same thing day after day. So why should they? Keep mealtime exciting with Nom Nom available at your local pet smart store or chewy? Learn [e-mail] JTF. That's trynom.com JTF hi, it's Jesse. Today on the show, she's a DJ.

[Interviewer/Host]

A caviar connoisseur, and a real housewife.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Of Salt Lake City.

[Interviewer/Host]

It's Meredith Marks.

[Meredith Marks]

My daughter gatekeeps the assistance from me because she's worried that I'm gonna overwhelm them and they'll quit. No. So I have to run everything through her and she delegates.

[Interviewer/Host]

Are you serious? I love that.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

This is. Dinner's on me. And I'm your host, Jesse Tyler Ferguson.

[Interviewer/Host]

Okay. The pressure is on for me today. I have. And it was only a matter of time, you guys. We have our very first real housewife from the Real Housewife franchise on the show today. I'm very excited that it's Meredith Marks.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Who I met at a mutual friend's.

[Interviewer/Host]

Birthday party a few months ago in.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Washington D.C. she was absolutely lovely and I sat between her and her husband Seth, and I had the greatest time with her. So I'm excited to continue our conversation here at Bottega Louis in West Hollywood. This spot is as stylish and lively.

[Interviewer/Host]

As my guest is now. If you've been here, you know, it's.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Part restaurant, part patisserie, part CNBC and hangout. It has marble floors, colorful macarons, the kind of place that has a buzz, that makes you feel like you're in New York City or Paris. It's the perfect place for Meredith Marks.

[Interviewer/Host]

Who'S elegant, polished, and always has an eye for design.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And just like her jewelry, everything here feels like it's effortless luxury, from the light filled dining room to cocktails that look almost too good to drink. And since Meredith was out djing in weho just last night, it feels right that we're just keeping things going on the same block that she was at.

[Interviewer/Host]

Until 1 o' clock in the morning last night.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

All right, I think she's walking in.

[Interviewer/Host]

Oh, my God, these boots are fabulous. Okay, check out my Instagram. You gotta see this. Look. Let's get to the conversation. You were just here last night.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You were like, next door.

[Meredith Marks]

I know. I realized that as I was pulling up, I was like, oh, gosh, right back there. Were you at Beaches?

[Interviewer/Host]

You were at beaches last night DJing?

[Meredith Marks]

Yes. It was so fun.

[Interviewer/Host]

Thanks for the invite, by the way.

[Meredith Marks]

It was so fun.

[Interviewer/Host]

Was it?

[Meredith Marks]

But I'm like, wiped out just because, like, it takes so long to not. Like all I wanted to do is go home and go to bed. But like, you're so wired up, you can't fall asleep.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Sure.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah. You got the adrenaline. That's how I am after I do it. You know, I do theater, and until I am after a show, I can't like adrenaline that literally is coursing through your veins. Do people just go insane when you're there?

[Meredith Marks]

It was wild. Like, everyone was just all revved up and excited last night. It was so fun. It's so. It's like throwing a party every day, you know? It's just fun. Super, super fun.

[Interviewer/Host]

Did any of your kids come?

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, Brooks and Chloe both came. Brooks surprised me. He wasn't supposed to be in town, and he flew in last minute.

[Interviewer/Host]

That's sweet.

[Meredith Marks]

And, yeah, it was really. It flew out first thing this morning, so it was really a pain for him to be bothered. And he did, which was really, really nice.

[Interviewer/Host]

How are you?

[Meredith Marks]

Hi. How's it going?

[Interviewer/Host]

I'm great. How are you? George.

[Server]

I'll be your server today.

[Meredith Marks]

Thank you.

[Interviewer/Host]

Meredith, welcome.

[Meredith Marks]

Pleasure to meet you.

[Server]

Can I get you guys thought about anything to drink? Some coffee maybe?

[Interviewer/Host]

What you thinking?

[Meredith Marks]

I would maybe have a cappuccino.

[Server]

New York.

[Meredith Marks]

2% would be great. Thank you.

[Interviewer/Host]

Can I see some sparkling water? Yeah, that's great.

[Server]

If you guys want to maybe start off with a starter, I do recommend our portobello fries. There are king mushroom fries with parmesan batter and basil aioli. They're very good if you like mushrooms.

[Meredith Marks]

Sounds great. I like my.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah, bring them out.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, let's do it.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No, but I was sitting next to.

[Interviewer/Host]

You at our mutual friend Larry Milstein's birthday party, which felt like a wedding. Am I wrong?

[Meredith Marks]

It was pretty spectacular.

[Interviewer/Host]

It was pretty spectacular.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It was in Washington, D.C. he had all these people.

[Interviewer/Host]

It was a destination birthday. A destination 40th.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Was it his.

[Interviewer/Host]

It was his 30th.

[Meredith Marks]

30Th.

[Server]

Yes.

[Interviewer/Host]

My God, I think everyone's my age.

[Meredith Marks]

Yes.

[Interviewer/Host]

And I'm 50 this year. Okay.

[Meredith Marks]

Okay. Well, I'm still older than you.

[Interviewer/Host]

Okay.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's not a competition.

[Interviewer/Host]

But I do know that you're born a little bit earlier than me.

[Meredith Marks]

Just a few years.

[Interviewer/Host]

So, yeah. We're in Washington, D.C. and I'm sat between you and your husband, Seth, and I am just having a lovely conversation with you. I'm like, so, what do you do? And you're like, well, I love it when people ask me this because they have no idea. Like, the very few people who don't know that I was on Modern Family and they don't know I'm an actor. I really enjoy meeting People who have no perception of me. I don't know how you respond to that. But, like, I was like, I had no idea what you. And you're like, well, I have a jewelry company, and I have this caviar company. And then I was talking to your.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Husband, and I was sort of, like.

[Interviewer/Host]

Slowly putting things together. I was like, oh, I think. And I got confirmation from someone else. I was like, yeah, you were part of the Real Housewives franchise.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And when I told some of my friends, they were like, oh, not only.

[Interviewer/Host]

Did you, like, sit next to, like, one of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, but it's like, the cast member that we all love so much love that. So, I mean, I felt very privileged that I got to sit between you and Seth, and I had a lovely time talking with both of you and learning about your family.

[Meredith Marks]

Such an amazing night.

[Interviewer/Host]

But what was so funny is, at one point, I said, where are you from? And he said, why did you ask me that? And I said, are you.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Did you, like.

[Interviewer/Host]

Did you spend any time in England? And you're like, oh, no.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

When I.

[Interviewer/Host]

When I drink, I start to get.

[Meredith Marks]

A little bit of a British glass with the alcohol.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And I was like, well, I don't.

[Interviewer/Host]

Hear it too much. It's just, like, really light. And you're like, yeah, well, I haven't really started yet.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, I probably had a couple sips.

[Interviewer/Host]

And then, like, two hours later, you, like, basically came up to me like, dame, you know, Maggie Smith. And I was like, oh, here she is.

[Meredith Marks]

It is the weirdest thing. I sometimes pick it up anyway, but usually that's when I'm around people who are English.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right?

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah. I don't know. It's very odd. I do that with every accent, though. Like, when I'm with my friends from the South, I start to pick up a Southern drawl. Very strange. It's not normal.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah, it's so funny. It's just so funny. So you hadn't watched any of the Real Housewives before being asked to be a part of the franchise?

[Meredith Marks]

Before being asked? No. Once I knew what was going on, I watched one episode from all the different scenes, cities thinking, like, I don't know what we're walking into. I hear they're all different. So I didn't, like, get the story arc. I didn't get the full picture. I was like, this is not a big deal, you know, because you don't understand, really, the full story.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right. The whole arc of a season here in Headlights.

[Meredith Marks]

I mean, I had no clue What I was getting involved in. I remember I left our first all cast and it was Jen Shaw had thrown a birthday party for me and she and Mary got into this screaming fight at the party in her bedroom. And I went home to my kids and they were like, how was it? How did it go? Da da da da. Oh my gosh. You guys are never going to believe this. They're like, what? What? I said Mary and Jen were fighting and they were yelling at each other and cameras were there filming it and they were like, yeah, mom, that's.

[Interviewer/Host]

That's what the show is. Were they. Were your kids fans of the show?

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, they had, they totally had watch it. So they knew exactly what I was getting involved in.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right. I mean, how did you get approached? You were already living in Salt Lake City when you were approached to do this? Because I know you had. You were a transplant from Chicago, right?

[Meredith Marks]

Correct. We had been in Chicago, then we were in Salt Lake, then we were part time between both for a while. And I really. My friend who, who owns my favorite restaurant in Park City handle her husband went to college with one of the producers and she was like, oh, will you talk to them? I didn't know I was being cast. I thought it was because I had a store on Main Street. They wanted to learn a little bit more about like Utah and what to do there. I didn't know it was Housewives at that point either. Like, we didn't know anything. I didn't. I didn't know anything. They just said, they're doing a reality show here. Will you talk to them? I said, sure, why not? I had no idea that's how it happened. Yeah.

[Interviewer/Host]

You didn't know that it was Housewives?

[Meredith Marks]

I didn't know it was Housewives. I didn't know. I didn't know I was being cast. Like, I thought they were just trying to get ideas for this show and were looking to talk to people in Utah.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

And then, like, I got on this long call, we were chit chatting about all kinds of stuff. Utah. And then he's like, okay, well can we set up a Skype? And I said, oh. And that's when it resonated. I'm like, okay, I get it. Yeah, yeah, I understand what's happening here now because I don't think people, you know, this was pre Covid. It was not normal to get on a Zoom or a Skype unless there was like a reason.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

It's like, okay, I gotcha.

[Interviewer/Host]

Did you know any of the other women who were being Courted for the other roles.

[Meredith Marks]

Well, so Lisa was on that text with me. It was a text between Megan, the owner of the restaurant, and me and Lisa together.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

So, yeah, obviously I knew her. And then it kind of snowballed from there. You know, she and I both made a couple. She made a lot of suggestions. I made a couple of suggestions of other people. She's much more, well, networked in Utah than I am. Right. And then, you know, they took people from that and their suggestions, et cetera, et cetera, and got us all put together.

[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, what is what. I can only imagine what that must be like to have all those people in your space. I mean, is it. It's it something that is. Feels invasive or do you really, truly forget about it?

[Meredith Marks]

No. Occasionally, yes, but generally, no. I mean, it's not terribly invasive. No. It doesn't feel, you know, they're not leaving things there. Like, if we had cameras in our homes 24 7.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

Like we did on our Below Deck crossover this year. That's another story. That's cha. Right. That. I don't know if I could really.

[Interviewer/Host]

Because that's like a 24 hour big brother type of.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah. And that was just a couple nights and it was a lot because you're thinking like, I have to change and, you know, clothes and.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Well, how does that work?

[Meredith Marks]

I don't. Well, we go in the bathroom, but, like, you know, you don't want to forget. I would be horrified. I'd be so embarrassed, you know?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Meredith tells me about how she handles the rumors and the nastiness and what her kids think of all the drama. Okay, be right back. You know, one of the things about hosting a show that's literally centered around meals is that you start thinking a lot about what foods do to your body. As for me, it's not just about enjoying a dinner with a friend. It's about feeling good after the meal, too. That's why I've been really curious about Psygnos. It's an AI powered app that pairs with a bio sensor to help you actually see in real time how your body responds to what you're eating. Your stress, your sleep. And even when you take a walk after dinner, instead of guessing, you suddenly get this clear picture of what's happening inside your body. Here's what I like. Psygnos can tell you which foods actually cause blood sugar spikes. It can give you little nudges in the moment, like, hey, maybe take a quick walk and it even helps you notice the difference between when you're really hungry and when you're just bored or stressed. Honestly, I wish I had had this when I was figuring out how to eat more intuitively. Psygnos really does take the guesswork out of managing your weight and building healthier habits. And right now they've got an exclusive offer just for our listeners. Go to signos.com that's S I G N O S.com and use code D to get $10 off select plans. That's Psygnos.com code DOM for $10 off select plans today. You know one of my favorite parts about this show is how much it reminds me of the little ways people show up for each other. A few years ago, I was starting rehearsal for a new play and a friend surprised me by sending money for my lunch on the first day. It was such a small gesture, but it made me feel so supported.

[Interviewer/Host]

Like, hey, I've got you.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

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[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, it seems like the, you know, when I was researching this next season, it seems like it's all leading up to something that happens with that below deck moment.

[Meredith Marks]

Kind of. Kind of not. Yeah, our season's gonna be interesting for me to see. There's a lot of stuff that goes on that we don't see because you're not there. Of course, even at an all cast when everybody's there, you don't see every conversation and so you don't really know exactly what's going on when you're not around. I think there was quite a bit that went on this year while I was not around. So I'm curious to see how it all unfolds, you know, and quite a bit that I know of that went on when I wasn't around. That is just not true.

[Interviewer/Host]

You know, I was also. I became.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It was so random.

[Interviewer/Host]

I became friendly with Christine from selling Sunset and she was pregnant. She invited me and just into a baby shower. And I don't know what I was thinking about. I just thought it was like a baby shower at our house. Like, little did I know, of course I show up and I'm signing releases and like, you know, I'm gonna be on the show. So I signed the release and Justin and I went in and you know, the cameras caught us and going in and I sat a nice little moment with her and it was very lovely. And then, you know, the show airs and sure enough, like, it's like the season premiere and it's her baby shower and I walk in and this little chyron with the umbilo and with the Jesse Tyler Ferguson and husband Justin Makeda.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And everyone's like, why are you at.

[Interviewer/Host]

This baby shower anyway? She was perfectly love, you know, she.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Was saying that was really hard with.

[Interviewer/Host]

With a lot of this stuff that happens that's completely out of our hands and you know, the power of the edit, you know, I can only imagine that that's got to be. That's got to be a tricky thing to navigate when, you know, you have signed a contract and like you have, you know, allowed people to film so much of your lives. But then, you know, you don't have creative control over like how that all comes together as well.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, I mean, part of what makes it entertaining is that of course you're only seeing moments. You're not seeing everything. And if they didn't leave things out, it would take away from the entertainment value. Of course, you Know, it's like having question marks is part of what makes it interesting.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

[Server]

I have here our fresh bread and butter. It's just out of the oven, so it's really hot, guys.

[Interviewer/Host]

Oh, thank you.

[Meredith Marks]

Beautiful.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's like a necklace.

[Server]

And also.

[Meredith Marks]

Love it.

[Server]

These are the portobello fries with basilioli.

[Interviewer/Host]

Thank you so much.

[Meredith Marks]

Amazing.

[Server]

Do you guys have any questions on the menu?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No, I think we're gonna. I'm gonna eat light this morning.

[Interviewer/Host]

I'm gonna do the Italian salad, please.

[Meredith Marks]

Are you okay with everything on the Italian?

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

Okay. And I'll do the arugula salad, please.

[Server]

Arugula salad.

[Meredith Marks]

Thank you so much.

[Interviewer/Host]

What's happening behind me?

[Meredith Marks]

I don't know a lot.

[Interviewer/Host]

But what I was gonna. I mean, you. From what I gather, and even just from the conversations I had with you when I met you, you seem like a real family person.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah.

[Interviewer/Host]

You and Seth, I mean.

[Meredith Marks]

Yes.

[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, the way you spoke about your children was like.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I mean, you were so proud of.

[Interviewer/Host]

All of your kids. I got to see all these pictures, you know, I mean, both you and your husband just talk so highly of them. How has it been, you know, like, balancing being in the public eye with so much of your life and also being present as a mother and protective as a mother. And I'm sure it's also hard for Seth.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I mean, he's also a part of.

[Interviewer/Host]

The show at times, so.

[Meredith Marks]

So it's. Well, it's tricky because, you know, for. So my middle son, who, you know, he's gay, but when we first started, he had. Was not public about it. He was not private about it. He was still figuring it out for himself. And we had people trying to out him on social media, some of my castmates encouraging the trolling, this, that, and the other. It was really very tough. But then once we got past that, and, you know, these difficult, traumatic experiences are also growth experiences, and once you see that, like, you come out and everyone's okay, then you can move on and reflect back. And it's all been very positive for him in the long run. It just was a short term, not so great moment. You know, I think it's important for them not to feel pressured to do something they don't want to do for sure.

[Interviewer/Host]

You know, as I was driving here today, like, just thinking about you, like, you parent, you know, obviously privately in ways that, you know, no one sees.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

But there's also, you know, I guess what I was thinking is, like, how we talk about.

[Interviewer/Host]

Because I was doing this with my kids. But I was talking to my kids about setting examples, and I was talking.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

To my son about how to behave.

[Interviewer/Host]

With some of his other friends. And like, you know, and I was realizing as I was saying, it's like, I have to also now be conscious of making sure I set an example and I do these things that I'm telling him to do. And, you know, on your show, it's, like, tricky because, you know, you're one of your. You're setting an example for your kids, but also, like, you know, they're showing all the worst moments, all your worst moments.

[Meredith Marks]

That's the show. That's the show.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I mean, has that. Has there ever been any moments with.

[Interviewer/Host]

Your kids where it's been like, mom, I cannot believe.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah. I mean, not. No, not like I cannot believe. Maybe not quite that judgmental, but they've been like, mom, did you think about handling this that way? Or whatever? You know, they're a little softer on the delivery.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

What's very interesting, though, is I think that my son now really, you know, because they were all very involved in my show, but it's a very different thing. Like, filming on my son's show is the easiest, like, most fun. So, like, light and great for me, but not for all of them, you know, and so, you know, he didn't quite get it, and now he's like, I understand. I understand. Because it's. It's intense and they don't always get it and they don't get that. Like, sometimes it's very intentional. And, you know, you've got a group of people just intentionally coming after you with anything they possibly can to try to get you to lose your temper. Like, I feel like that's half of our show. Like, at least half of our show is how many times can we just poke at Meredith until she loses her temper? Because I'm actually a pretty calm, collected human being. But when I lose it, I lose it.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

And it does not happen easily. And so they kind of spend a lot of time, I think, just like, how are we gonna get her to.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Well, I think. Do you think maybe you set that.

[Interviewer/Host]

Up, that challenge for them? Because my perception, because I have since now knowing you, I've gone back and I've watched some episodes. My perception is that you are very cool and you are very level headed and you have these great catchphrases. Like, you know, like, I'm disengaging. Like, you. You are very good about. Like, I'm not gonna be part of that. So I Wonder if it, like, it also sets up a challenge, but, like, how are we gonna get her to crack? Because you are pretty good about.

[Meredith Marks]

I think it 100% does. So I probably have to change my behavior in order to change theirs. Right. Maybe I just become so explosive.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

Any little.

[Interviewer/Host]

We got to keep her calm.

[Meredith Marks]

Right? Exactly. They'll be trying to calm me down at all times instead of revving me up. I think that's the way I go. I think I should just be so reactive and explosive. They'll be like, oh, my God, what happened to. To her?

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

So, I mean, you know, I mean, what.

[Interviewer/Host]

What does make you want to come back after a year that. That might be difficult?

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah. I mean, you know, it's. It's interesting because there are times where I say, I'm not going back. I'm not going back. I'm not going back. The thing is, the, you know, at the end of everything, you look at things like, what are the benefits? You know, what are. What are the costs to it? And I feel like talking openly about my marital struggles, talking openly about my relationship with my son, things like that. Those are things that some people either are going through, or they didn't have the supportive parent that my son has. And it's nice for them to see that there is that kind of support out there, or they are struggling with their marriage, and they don't know that it's okay to feel that way.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah. The negative's not so great, but it's also at the. The end of everything. You know, when I look at my castmates and I say, oh, my gosh, this person's spreading all these horrible lies about me. And the public's gonna hear this. I just say, you know what? Consider the source, like, the ones who spread the lies consistently do it. So anyone who is remotely intelligent is going to see, well, this person lies all the time. I'm sure she's not telling the truth about Meredith, and they know it. And guess what? If they're that dumb to believe the liar, I don't care what they think about me. I don't.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah. And it's hard not to get, you know, not only just worked up with it by it, but, like, hurt by it.

[Meredith Marks]

Well, it's harder, I think, with the press.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

Than it is when you have someone who's on TV consistently lying. You know what I'm saying? If something came from a very credible cast member, I'd be upset by.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right, Right.

[Meredith Marks]

Thing is, it generally doesn't.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

As the.

[Interviewer/Host]

Kids say, Tea, you have been so open about your, your marriage and your relationship. And I, I didn't know this until I went back and looked, but, like, when you started the show, you and Seth were in a very tricky place in your relationship.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You were basically separated.

[Meredith Marks]

Yes.

[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, talk me through that.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Was that something you were nervous about or.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, I mean, it was kind of like a crazy thing because, you know, we had been separated on and off for a while. It wasn't really public because our kids didn't know we kind of had the viewpoint they were trying to stay together until they got out of, you know, went away to college. And it would be a little bit easier then. So when my daughter finally went away was basically just a couple months before we started filming. And I didn't know if we were going to work things out or not. You know, we. I really thought we were headed towards divorce. My husband did too. And I guess when the kids finally did leave, it was like, well, we have to make a choice here. There's no reason. Like, we always had this excuse of the kids, they're not in the house anymore, do we want to be together or not? And so we kind of gave it a last stitch effort with someone who ended up being a great marriage counselor. And it worked. It's. You know, we just, we loved each other always. It was just, we had terrible communication and had just pent up anger over a lot of things that could have been resolved by talking.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Now for a quick break, but don't go away after the break. Meredith tells me about the blind date that led to her decades long marriage to Seth and how they've handled marital issues with the cameras rolling. Okay, be right back. All right, confession time. I have entered a new era of my life. It is the LED helmet era, and honestly, I'm loving it. I've been using the Irestore Elite, which is this hands free light therapy device that helps regrow hair. And yes, it looks a little like something that your kids would wear on a bicycle if they were bicycling in the future. It looks like it's from a sci fi movie, but no, it actually works. You just pop it on while you're watching TV or scrolling through your phone. I'm actually wearing it right now as I'm recording this ad. And it does all the work for you. The holidays are here, parties, family photos, all these moments where you want to look and feel your best. And the Irestore Elite makes it so easy to get ahead of bad hair days. It's clinically proven to help regrow hair using hundreds of lasers and LEDs that target your scalp. It's super comfortable, totally hands free, and you could literally do it while wrapping gifts or eating leftovers or recording ads for your podcast. And if you want to boost your results, they've got a full Revive plus Max Growth kit, shampoo, conditioner, growth serum, the whole thing. It's like a full on hair care squad. So treat yourself or someone you love to the gift of great hair. So here's the deal. Use code dinnersirestore.com for an exclusive discount on the Irestore Elite. That's code dinners on irestore.com support the show and maybe make bad hair days a thing of your past. The holidays are here, which means it's officially hosting season. Whether it's friendsgiving Thanksgiving or just that first cozy dinner with people you love, I like to make sure everyone feels taken care of. And Total Wine and More makes it so easy for me to stock up for my guests. They've got thousands of wines, spirits and beers at the lowest prices and plenty of non alcohol options too, so everyone can join in on the toast. This year I'm trying a cranberry spritz for my guests and a spiced pear mocktail for me. And if you're not sure what pairs with turkey or stuffing or pie, their friendly guides will always be happy to help you find your perfect match. With the lowest prices for over 30 years, you'll always find what you love and love what you find only at Total Wine and More. Curbside pickup and delivery available in most areas. See totalwine.com for details. Spirits not sold in Virginia and North Carolina Drink responsibly. Be 21 Are you a deal seeker? Because I totally am. I totally am. There's just something about finding that perfect limited time deal that makes you feel like you've unlocked a secret level in life. And right now, Macy's has basically turned that feeling into a full on event with their parade of Deals. Every day from now through November 27th, Macy's is rolling out brand new one day only deals like Dyson Big Ball Vacuum if you want your everyday chores to feel a little fancy, or a Ninja Blender if you're like me and can't stop experimenting in the kitchen. Personally, I've got my eye on the Ugg Fluff throw. It's made for people who plan to skip the turkey trot and watch the parade from the couch. No shame in that. And the best part? There's something new every Single day. So the thrill never wears off. The parade of deals is happening now@macy's.com or in store. Game on, deal seekers. And we're back with more dinners on me.

[Server]

Sorry to interrupt.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Thank you.

[Interviewer/Host]

Look at how big this little salad is for you.

[Meredith Marks]

Oh, my gosh. This is a serious salad.

[Interviewer/Host]

That's all the arugula in Southern California.

[Meredith Marks]

Exactly. You guys thought I was hungry.

[Server]

Your performance last night.

[Meredith Marks]

We figured I burned off some calories.

[Interviewer/Host]

So we got to fill you up with arug.

[Meredith Marks]

Did not have dinner last night. Good call.

[Interviewer/Host]

Thank you so much.

[Meredith Marks]

That looks amazing, too. Sure, why not?

[Interviewer/Host]

You and Seth got married very young, right?

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, yeah. We met at 23. Wow. And got engaged at 24.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And how did you two meet?

[Meredith Marks]

We were set up on a blind date.

[Interviewer/Host]

Oh, really?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Like an actual blind date where you.

[Interviewer/Host]

Did not know where each other looked like. I'll have some too. Yeah. Thank you.

[Meredith Marks]

Like, actual. What happened was Seth.

[Interviewer/Host]

Because there was no Internet back then.

[Meredith Marks]

There was not Internet back then. There was not Internet. Seth met a friend of mine, I guess, out one night, and he went back to her apartment and saw a picture of me in her apartment and started asking questions about me. He was like, oh, who's this? Whatever. The next day, she told me the story, and I was like, and she's going on and on about how great he is and how cute he is and this, that, and the other. I was like, oh, great. Well, why don't you set us up? And she's like, I kind of like him. And I said, well, you have a boyfriend. And she's like, yeah, you're right. I do. Okay, I'll set you guys up. And so I was in business school at the time, and I went to South America for, like, a month. Business school. And so we scheduled the. This date for, like, weeks in advance when I was getting back and I got back in town, and the day rolls around that we're supposed to go out, and I don't hear anything. And my friend called me, and she's like, I haven't heard anything from him. And I'm like, well, that's rude. I don't want to go out with him. And she goes, I'll call him. I'm like, you can do what you want. I would never call him. And so she called him, and he was. And. And this is the year Michael Jordan just came back to the Bulls. And he was like, well, we're going. I'm going to the Bulls game tonight. Maybe we'll meet for a drink. After she called me back and told me what he said. And I go, ew. I said, I'm not doing that. Tell him I'm sorry, it's too inconvenient. Perhaps he wants to make it another night. I'm not meeting him for a drink. Perfect. So she did, and he said, well, do you guys want to go to the Voles game? And now I'm just being a little bitchy because I know it's the hardest ticket under the sun to get. So I figure I'll call him out. I'm like, sure, let's go. So he had to scramble somehow to get. You know, it was not an easy ticket at all. But he did. And we went and we hit it off. I mean, he was funny. He was like, ask me the strangest questions. Was like, burying. I don't know. He was. It was just like, if I got my manicure and pedicure in the same place, like, that's just a weird question, you know? And then I asked him what he did, and he said, I'm in international trade. And I'm like, well, okay, that's really vague. What are you trying to. Are you dealing arms, drugs? Like, you know, what is this? Blah, blah, blah? Well, apparently, he had told that to, like, every date he'd ever been on. And nobody ever asked what that meant. So that was a positive for me. It's like, I'm just actually kind of smart.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

You know, whatever. I don't know. It was fun. We had a great time. And then he followed up later. But it ended up that while I was in South America, he started dating someone else. Which was why he never followed up with the date to begin with. Cause he felt, like, uncomfortable. But he told me that, like, the next time I saw him and said, but I like you better. What should I do? And I said, well, I don't really know what to tell you about that. You know, why don't you figure that out and let me know? You know, get back to me. So he did. He broke up with the girl. He never even tried to kiss me until he got rid of her. He was a gentleman.

[Interviewer/Host]

Well behaved, very well played. Seth, I'm getting a sense that, like, you played hardball. And sometimes I feel like that's the best way to show that you're serious.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

But also, like, that you're not just.

[Interviewer/Host]

Gonna, like, you know, roll with the punches either. Like, you gotta earn it.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, I think it's, like, true. Not just in a relationship, but, like, in life in general, with friendships. Anything. You have to have boundaries of what you're willing to deal with and not, you know, I think it's really important. And it's like, also to protect yourself. You know, it's. A, it works.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah, yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

You know, but B, it's also very important to protect yourself.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah. And I imagine that for you and Seth, your relationship is so much stronger after this work you put into it than it was before. I mean, I don't think you ended up. You obviously didn't end up in the same place.

[Meredith Marks]

When we were separated, at times we did, and at times we didn't. During that first season, he was not living in Utah with me. He was actually living in Chicago. You know, he would come in and visit, see how things were going, and remember, our kids were there for the most part, too. So. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I think it's tricky. I think it's really hard because, like, some people are just not meant to be together and it's not going to work, and you're definitely better off moving on like other people. It's just a glitch in communication or. Or potentially boundaries or there. It can be a lot of different things. You know, Know, for us, it was communication. And, you know, communication had just become completely transactional because we were irritated with each other, you know, and. And so the more irritated you get, the more combative your communication becomes. And then it just snowballs and gets worse and worse and worse until you have someone who's actually a talented marriage counselor to intervene and kind of redirect you both. And if you're both open to it, it can work.

[Interviewer/Host]

Do you still work with the same person?

[Meredith Marks]

No, I wish. He's in Chicago and he's, like, not licensed to practice in another state. So every once in a while we're like, I want to check in, because I would like to check in at least a couple times a year, but you can't see us, so I'd love to find someone else. I think it's healthy to have a little check in. I think it's healthy to go to a counselor before you even get married. It's just learning tools for better communication, and it's helpful in life. Like, I feel like it's just. It's good. And I do think it's getting better and better. Like, I watch my kids and their friends and, you know, they're all much more into, like, being mentally and physically very healthy. You know, that's a really big priority to that generation. And although, like, surge in Wellness right now, it's as a business is insane.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Sometimes to the point where I'm.

[Interviewer/Host]

It drives me a little crazy. I'm like, how many days of wellness? Like, you got to get to work too? Like, you've had enough days of mental health wellness?

[Meredith Marks]

Well, yes, that's. That is an interesting issue.

[Interviewer/Host]

Let's play a balance here.

[Meredith Marks]

Look. My daughter gatekeeps the assistance from me because she's worried that I'm going to overwhelm them and they'll quit.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No.

[Meredith Marks]

So I have to run everything through her. And she delicates.

[Interviewer/Host]

Are you serious? I love that.

[Meredith Marks]

And she's like, they can't handle this. You can't do this to someone else. Just send it to me and I will delegate.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

My husband does it and it's usually.

[Interviewer/Host]

Between the hours of 4:30am and 6:30am when he wakes up and he can't go back to sleep. And he just starts rapid texting and emailing. And I wake up and it's just like 10 things in my email box that are like, things I have to get done that day. And it drives me crazy. Yeah, it does.

[Meredith Marks]

No, it does to me too. Well, I hate my email right now. It's just too much.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

It's overwhelming.

[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, if I could get off of it, I would.

[Meredith Marks]

It's nice to not have all of that. And it's nice to have, like, engagement with people and do. And we actually just. I launched this game called Numerous Emptiness.

[Interviewer/Host]

You delivered a box to my house. Oh, I just got one. Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

Today. Amazing. Yeah. So I mean, it's nice to like, engage with a person.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

You know.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

As opposed to, like the phone. Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Talk about the game.

[Interviewer/Host]

I'm so excited to play it. It's called Rumors and Nastiness.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yes.

[Meredith Marks]

So it's basically. It's like. Is it a.

[Interviewer/Host]

That's a catchphrase on your show, right?

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah, I said like, she wants to go there. We can go there. The rumors and the nastiness about us. Oh, yeah. That was one of my finer moments. I definitely went a little bit British and a lot angry, but yeah. So the whole idea is, you know, is it a rumor or a nasty truth? There are prompts. It's time come up with a story. And maybe it's true, maybe it isn't. And that's the whole point. Everyone else is guessing and you either lose and take a shot or you win and get a diamond.

[Interviewer/Host]

What does the shot glass say?

[Meredith Marks]

I'm disengaged. The cards are in a caviar tin.

[Interviewer/Host]

That's so good. Yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

It all kind of comes full circle.

[Interviewer/Host]

It's perfect. Yeah. You recently got bat mitzvahed on the show.

[Meredith Marks]

I did. I did.

[Interviewer/Host]

Wait, does he talk to me on that? What's, like, the Jewish faith mean?

[Meredith Marks]

So it's interesting because I am not a really heavily religious person. It's just. It's not my thing. I think for a lot of people, it's very important. In fact, for the large majority of my cast, it is extraordinarily important. Even if they're no longer a part of the Mormon Church, it still plays a massive role in their life being out of the church. You know, like, it's really a very big deal to the large majority of. Of the women. And for me, it's a little bit different. Judaism is not just, you know, a religion. I mean, my DNA comes back 100% Eastern European, Jewish. It's my heritage, it's my blood, it's my being. So for me to affirm that had a lot more to do with it just being a big part of my life and who I am and a little bit less about religion. Religion, to me, is really about family, which I'm sure, sure is not surprising, but that's what it is. It's time to be together as a family. Time to, you know, yes, you can say your prayers to God or higher power or whatever you personally believe in. And so it was more about a heritage for me than anything else. You know, it's who I am.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah. It's interesting that it came back to you, though, when you were ready for it. Yeah, it's really beautiful. Well, congratulations on your Bat Mitzvah.

[Meredith Marks]

Thank you.

[Interviewer/Host]

I hope you got lots of wonderful gifts.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You talked about that on the show.

[Interviewer/Host]

You don't see everything that's happening. And now you said you do have to watch the show, which I think I'm sure it's very helpful to sort of see what the other conversations are. And I know just from how it's shot, that so much of it happens, like what we're watching right now happens so long ago. Talk to me about how it is when you're watching something that happened so.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Long ago, but you're watching it in.

[Interviewer/Host]

Real time now, and how it affects your relationships as you're shooting things that are happening in current time.

[Meredith Marks]

Right. That's why we can't film an era at the same time.

[Interviewer/Host]

Right.

[Meredith Marks]

Because you'll fixate on what's airing, and then it's all stale content. You know, it's Going to be not great. So it's like we have to let everything air so that everyone can move on. Because when it's in your face, you can't move on.

[Interviewer/Host]

Okay. And then you have a reunion show where you get to air it out.

[Meredith Marks]

In front of everyone and then you can hopefully move on and get some fresh, new, interesting stuff going. But because it's boring, like, who wants to. To sit and listen to the same argument for five years? You know, I don't want to and I'm there. So the audience really doesn't want to.

[Interviewer/Host]

But like, but how do you prepare yourself for, like, okay, now we're walking into a new season. Is it a little bit of cleaning the slate? Is it obviously there. There's still loose ends to tie up. But how do you. I know you've had fractured relationships and you're back together with people and like. Like things that obviously, obviously when you have information about people, the relationship changes and you have to earn back trust. And I know all those things are in play. It's just like any human. But how is it.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I mean, how do you.

[Meredith Marks]

I don't know.

[Interviewer/Host]

I'm just sort of impressed by the fact that you've all can, like, still continue to coexist together.

[Meredith Marks]

I get I. To me, I would rather just move on for the most part. Sometimes it's hard. Sometimes you're hurt by things, you know, and it's not easy to move on, but I think you can always move on. It just changes your dynamic, changes your boundaries, changes the way you may engage with somebody. But I don't like to dwell in the past. That's just not my thing. I mean, I've been accused over the years of everything. I'm told I'm a grudge holder when I'm the one who moves on pretty quick, you know, I mean, sometimes I, as an audience, they don't know how quickly, like, we found something out. And then you're back up and filming again because they don't recognize, like, we're airing. And sometimes we don't know about these things until we see them air. So, sure, I'm human. I take a little time to process things, but I move on pretty easily because I'm just. A, forgiveness is for me, not for you. B, when you show me who you are, I'm going to accept it and proceed accordingly. I've just never been the girl who's like, sees someone that you don't like and you pretend you don't know them. That's just not my vibe. You know, someone. So you say hello, and you move on. Like, you don't have to sit there and be best friends. You don't have to, you know, braid each other's hair, but you can say hello.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah, yeah.

[Meredith Marks]

You know, and so. So that's kind of how I approach it. But I don't know. I mean, everyone's a little bit different. And I do think that overall, the women do try to move forward, but there's a lot of triggers out there that bring you back. And it's easy to get triggered, you know, because they all. By virtue of it being reality tv. The reality is we know what each other's triggers are because. Cause we watch the show.

[Interviewer/Host]

Okay, what are some of the triggers of your castmates?

[Meredith Marks]

Okay, well, Lisa, it's not hard. Her business, obviously, is a massive trigger. Like, we saw that. That she did. Not like that at all. Almost everybody's marriage or children is going to be huge, like always. And it's understandably, you know, but now I'm deciding consciously, just so everyone knows. And if any of my castmates are listening, you guys should know this, too. And my producers, I have decided not to let that ever trigger me again because they weaponized it one time too many.

[Interviewer/Host]

Got it. You heard it.

[Meredith Marks]

Best of luck to you.

[Interviewer/Host]

Moving forward, it would be hard not to let that trigger me.

[Meredith Marks]

Family like that's decided not to.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Okay.

[Meredith Marks]

It says more about them than it does about anyone else.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah, I know. You're right.

[Meredith Marks]

Like, anyone who's going after somebody kid, it speaks volumes about them and says nothing about the kid.

[Interviewer/Host]

I know, I know. You're so right.

[Meredith Marks]

And then we let it get the best of us so that we have a bad reaction. And then I'm held to a higher standard for my reaction than the person is who caused the reaction. It's called reactive abuse. And so I'm just not doing it.

[Interviewer/Host]

Okay.

[Meredith Marks]

I'm not doing it. We think we'll see. Let them go. Let them go. Let's see how ugly and dirty they'll get. Okay. But, yeah, usually it's family, business, marriage. Yeah.

[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, it's all the triggers that.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

We all have, too.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah.

[Interviewer/Host]

You know.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah. I mean, that's pretty simple. And so on a basic level, that's it. And then, of course, you know, anything that's legal, people get very rough by as well. You know, it's like everyone wants to talk about Lisa's lawsuits. Well, we've got a lot of people on this cast who have criminal and civil, you know, charges, lawsuits, et Cetera. And let's talk about everybody then, right? You know, I don't. So great, let's talk about it.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

But I did want to know, like.

[Interviewer/Host]

What are for you? I mean, is there like an end.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Game for you with this?

[Interviewer/Host]

Or, like, you obviously have had such success in your career before this beat happened.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It doesn't feel like there are certain.

[Interviewer/Host]

People who I know are part of this franchise who kind of need this because this is the train that keeps the things moving. You had all those things going before, and it's like you add the train afterwards. At least that's how I perceived it.

[Meredith Marks]

Yeah.

[Interviewer/Host]

I mean, what do you see as, like, the long game for you?

[Meredith Marks]

You know, it's funny because when I first started this, I said, I will do this for three to five years because, you know, you can use it as a platform to do all these great things that I mentioned earlier. And. But after that, people have seen too much about you. And life evolves. And by virtue of just life and just changes in our environment, growth as a human being, things that happen, you are going to be hypocritical when they go back and pull something up from five years ago. When you get to that point, it's sort of like you're going past the point of a positive return. Well, I finished season six, so there you go. Obviously, I don't know. I think that at some point, if I ever feel that the negative outweighs the positive, I will return. There's no reason to. But as long as I'm feeling a good sense of. Of fulfillment from it, and I feel like I'm thriving on it from my businesses or. Or from my personal missions in life, I'll continue. So I don't know, someday that will happen. Or someday I'll just get tired.

[Interviewer/Host]

Yeah, you know, it does sound exhausting. I mean, especially when you're DJing until, you know, one in the morning. Oh, I do. I do need.

[Meredith Marks]

I will not be DJing during our filming season. That is it. We will shut off the DJ during that time. I can't. Like, it's too much.

[Interviewer/Host]

You know, I do want to come see you dj.

[Meredith Marks]

Yes.

[Interviewer/Host]

Well, will you please text me the next time you're doing it?

[Meredith Marks]

I will.

[Interviewer/Host]

Oh, my God, I adore you. Thank you for doing this. And dinner is on me.

[Meredith Marks]

Oh, my gosh. Thank you. So much fun.

[Interviewer/Host]

So much fun.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Next week on Dinners on Me. You know him as Dustin Henderson from Stranger Things. It's Gaten Matarazzo. We'll get into his early acting days. Commuting to Broadway after class, his long term relationship with high school sweetheart Lizzie, and we'll hear about living in a bachelor pad with co star Finn Wolfhard. And if you don't want to wait until next week to listen, you can download that episode right now by subscribing to Dinners On Me. Plus, as a subscriber, not only do you get access to new episodes one week early, you'll also be able to listen completely ad free. Just click Try Free at the top of the Dinners on Me show page on Apple Podcasts to start your free trial today. Dinners on Me is a production of Sony Music Entertainment and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch. Our showrunner is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Alyssa Midcalf. Sam Behr engineered this episode. Hans Dale, she composed our theme music. Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tameka Balance Kolasny and Justin Makita. I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.

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