Side Dish: More Shoshana Bean

Summary

Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson

Episode: Side Dish: More Shoshana Bean (April 30, 2026)
Guest: Shoshana Bean
Location: Miriam's, Upper West Side, NYC

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Episode Overview

In this "Side Dish" episode, Jesse Tyler Ferguson enjoys a candid and lively brunch conversation with Broadway star Shoshana Bean at Miriam’s on Manhattan’s Upper West Side. The episode dives into Shoshana’s early days hustling in the theater world, her experience stepping into the iconic role of Elphaba in Wicked, the emotional complexities of being a theatrical “replacement,” and her current excitement—and anxieties—about starring in the new Broadway musical Lost Boys. The conversation over Turkish eggs and borekas weaves through stories of perseverance, identity, vulnerability, and the unglamorous side of Broadway dreams.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Stepping into Elphaba in Wicked

[02:45–09:37]

• Reluctance and Sports Metaphors:
  Shoshana reflects on not wanting her Broadway breakthrough moment to be all about her, referencing sports metaphors to describe her role as a “runner” rather than the “hitter” when first covering Elphaba.

  • “It was almost like in baseball… I’m just the runner. Like, she’s the hitter.” (Shoshana, 02:45)

• Embracing Leadership:
  She credits earlier experiences in Hairspray, watching Harvey Fierstein and Marissa Jaret Winokur, for showing her how to lead a show:

  • “I observed, I absorbed. I knew what to do.” (Shoshana, 04:30)

• Feeling Like a Replacement:
  Shoshana addresses imposter syndrome—knowing she wasn’t the producer’s first choice and struggling to own her power in the role. She describes how letting go of that pressure unexpectedly set her free on stage.

  • “Something very interesting happens when you no longer give a fuck. You sort of liberate yourself to be your fullest self.” (Shoshana, 06:19)

• Earning Her Place:
  A pivotal moment occurred when, during a rare performance as Elphaba, producer Marc Platt saw her and realized, “What the fuck are we doing? We have her right here.” Within days, she got the offer.

  • “Mark Platt was in the house that night and apparently he called the team and was like, what the fuck are we doing? We have her right here.” (Shoshana, 07:02)

• Challenges of Being a Replacement:
  Months into her run, director Joe Mantello returned and challenged her performance, pushing her to stop mimicking her predecessor and fully inhabit the character. It was then Shoshana started truly making Elphaba her own.

  • “What I didn’t want to say was, like, I'm just sort of barfing up my version of what I saw.” (Shoshana, 08:03)
  • “I think I just have to really just let this be mine now.” (Shoshana, 08:51)

• Humor About Imposter Syndrome:
  Jesse lightens the mood with playful banter:

  • “I wake up every day saying, I am the new Alphabet.” (Jesse, 09:10)

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The Magic and Anxiety of Opening a New Broadway Show (Lost Boys)

[13:08–18:29]

• Generational Gaps and Backstage Memories:
  Shoshana shares an anecdote about a young co-star, Benjamin Kjak, innocently asking if she ever met Judy Garland, drawing laughter about age and Broadway lore.

  • “Did you ever meet her?” (Benjamin Kjak, [13:32])
  • “How old do you think I am?” (Shoshana, [13:36])

• Specialness and Timeliness:
  Shoshana recounts a castmate's observation that everyone will see themselves in the characters, emphasizing the show’s themes of belonging, otherness, and found family.

  • “It is about belonging and finding your people… anyone who’s been othered… will find that and feel that.” (Shoshana, 14:14)

• Broadway Tech Humor:
  She amusingly describes how Lost Boys is using a repurposed “Elphaba jib” (stage lift) originally from the Korean production of Wicked:

  • “He's actually on… an actual Elphaba jib that has been reconstructed, but we got it from, like, the Korean production of Wicked.” (Shoshana, 15:22)

• Pre-Show Jitters & Sacredness of Previews:
  With Lost Boys about to open, Shoshana and Jesse discuss the mixture of excitement and nausea as they prepare for an audience. Shoshana confides in the unique sacredness of rehearsals before the floodgates of public feedback open:

  • “It’s never had an audience, a mounting of a production anywhere… Our team has done this really interesting job of just keeping a lid on everything… So it really is… still untouched.” (Shoshana, 16:45–17:09)
  • “This moment is still ours… It’s never gonna happen again.” (Shoshana, 17:39)

• Reflections on the Theatrical Rollercoaster:
  The conversation recognizes the recurring, paradoxical feelings performers experience: terror and exhilaration, especially right before a new show meets its first audience.

  • “I was saying this to them... I know when something feels special. This is special. You’re not crazy. Don’t miss a single second of this.” (Shoshana, 17:51)

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Day Jobs, Hustle, and Early New York Theater Life

[21:51–26:16]

• Resisting the Musical Theater Mold:
  Shoshana tells Jesse about her determination to be different at University of Cincinnati, digging for obscure, soulful songs that no one else would perform.

  • “I just wanted to be different. So I dug so deep to find things that no one was doing… to just not be like anybody else.” (Shoshana, 22:51)

• Breaking Out with Godspell and Life Off-Broadway:
  Jesse brings up Shoshana’s unforgettable solo in Godspell, marveling at the rawness and energy she brought to her role.

  • “You must have felt like you were bursting out of the gate. Like a bull bursting into the pen.” (Jesse, 23:18)

  Shoshana reminisces about the production’s barebones origins—performed in an office building behind a Victoria’s Secret, with dressing rooms made from borrowed meeting spaces and file cabinets:

  • “We would walk by. File cabinet stick, baby.” (Shoshana, 24:47)

• Day Jobs Meeting Broadway Legends:
  To pay the bills, Shoshana worked the front desk at Equinox gym:

  • “I worked the front desk… That’s where I, like, met Mark Kudish. Fell in love with Mark Kudis… Mandy [Patinkin] worked out there…” (Shoshana, 25:07–25:28) Jesse compares this to Justin Makita’s experience at Equinox West Hollywood, where Queen Latifah was a regular.

• Life Changes, Or Not:
  The narrative humorously tracks her move from the fifth floor of an office building (Godspell’s first home) to the York Theatre—“the basement of a church”—with “up” in career actually meaning “down” in real estate.

  • “So by moving up, I meant down.” (Shoshana, 26:18)

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Personal Stories & Theater Family

[26:36–29:37]

• Family Talk and The Joy of Children:
  Shoshana asks about Jesse’s husband and kids. Jesse comically recounts his son Beckett waking him up at 4:30am, excited for the day:

  • “How could I possibly go back to bed when I’m so excited about the day?” (Beckett, 26:46)

• Performer FOMO:
  Reflections on the “fear of missing out” that accompanies both parenthood and performing:

  • “Now I’m like, please put me to sleep. Please can I miss out?” (Shoshana, 27:33)
  • “We do still… We’re not dead yet. Not dead inside.” (Shoshana, 27:43)

• Rush of the First Audience:
  Jesse and Shoshana bond over the “insane rush of energy” from performing for that first crowd, admitting to pre-show anxiety.

  • “That first time in front of an audience, it's gonna be like that for a minute with this show.” (Jesse, 28:20)

• New Show Magic:
  Shoshana talks about how Lost Boys has had no out-of-town tryout, making the upcoming Broadway opening even more nerve-wracking and magical.

  • “I realized, like, it never got an out of town tryout… I haven't done anything like that.” (Shoshana, 28:28)
  • “This show feels a lot like Hairspray in that way. Just like a magical curation, an alchemy of people.” (Shoshana, 29:09)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Something very interesting happens when you no longer give a fuck. You sort of liberate yourself to be your fullest self.”
  — Shoshana Bean [06:19]

• “He’s actually on… an actual Elphaba jib… from, like, the Korean production of Wicked.”
  — Shoshana Bean [15:22]

• “It's about belonging and finding your people and finding your family and finding your community… Anyone who’s been othered… will find that and feel that.”
  — Shoshana Bean [14:14]

• “That first time in front of an audience, it's gonna be like that for a minute with this show.”
  — Jesse Tyler Ferguson [28:20]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 02:45 – Shoshana on stepping into Wicked, sports metaphors, and leadership
• 06:19 – Letting go, finding freedom on stage
• 07:02 – Marc Platt recognizes Shoshana’s talent; offer extended
• 08:03 – Coping with being “just a replacement”
• 13:08 – Humorous generational moment: “Did you ever meet Judy Garland?”
• 14:14 – Universal themes of Lost Boys
• 15:22 – Technical details: Re-purposed Elphaba "jib" on Broadway
• 16:45 – The sacredness of preview rehearsals
• 21:51 – Finding musical theater “pockets” and resisting the norm
• 23:18 – Explosive debut in Godspell, offbeat NYC theater spaces
• 25:07 – Day jobs: Checking in Mandy Patinkin, Broadway legends at Equinox
• 26:36 – Parenthood, FOMO, and pre-show excitement
• 28:28 – Unique jitters for Lost Boys’ Broadway world premiere
• 29:09 – Comparing Lost Boys to the alchemy of Hairspray’s cast

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Tone & Energy

The episode radiates warmth, self-deprecating humor, candid honesty, and a palpable sense of excitement—mixed with a performer’s perpetual anxiety—about theater, family, and being true to oneself. Jesse’s gentle banter keeps things playful, while Shoshana brings emotional depth and a rare window into both the pressure and joy of a Broadway life.

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For Listeners New and Old

This episode offers a revealing backstage glimpse into Broadway stardom, with honest highs, relatable insecurities, unforgettable anecdotes, and inspiring reflections. Whether you’re a lifelong theater fan or just discovering Shoshana Bean, it’s a feel-good, full-hearted window into the real lives behind the curtain.

Transcript

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Spring break planning at our house is it's definitely an adventure. Our kids have very strong opinions and they're always on different sides of the spectrum. Beckett has very strong opinions about the ocean. It has to be a certain temperature and the wind has to be blowing a certain way if he's gonna get anywhere near it. He doesn't want sand on his feet. Sully, on the other hand, he will roll around in the sand and doesn't care about the water temperature. And he, you know, he could be just sitting amongst seagulls and he's happy. Justin and I, we just want to air conditioning and wifi. Honestly, juggling all the details of a trip can be very stressful. And while I'm thinking about our plans, I also start thinking about our house while we're away. And it hits me. Maybe we could list our place on Airbnb while we're gone. It always sounds great, but I don't know if I can manage all the details myself. That's where Airbnb's co host network comes in. You can hire a vetted local co host to handle all the behind the scenes details, managing reservations, guest communications, and even providing on site. So hosting feels manageable even with everything else going on. So if you're traveling this spring, it might be the perfect time to list your space on Airbnb and maybe earn a little extra cash while you're gone to put toward that extra future travel someplace with air conditioning and Wi fi. If you're ready to host but could use a little extra help, find a co [e-mail] host

[Shoshana Bean]

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[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Hey, it's Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Here's a little side dish from this week's episode of Dinner's on Me. This week's guest, Deshaun Shoshana Bean. And you know her from Broadway hits like Wicked Hairspray and Waitress, as well as her powerhouse solo music career. We met up at Miriam's on the Upper west side to catch up over brunch, specifically some Turkish eggs and barekas and swapped stories from the early days of auditioning and hustling in the theater world. Along the way, Shoshanna shares what it was like stepping into one of Broadway's most iconic roles under unexpected circumstances, and how those moments shaped the artist she is today. Now, to get back into the conversation, you're joining us just as Shoshanna talks about stepping into the role of Elphaba in Wicked.

[Shoshana Bean]

And I just remember feeling like, yeah, yeah, don't make this in any way about me. I, like, wanted her to have that moment. And it was almost like in baseball, you have a designated hitter, you know, and someone else runs. Yeah, well, when I was in softball. Well, so I don't want to miss. I don't want to misrepresent baseball, but sometimes someone just hits and someone else runs. And I was like, I'm just the runner. Like, she's the hitter. If that makes it. You'll edit that and make me sound halfway into the.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No, we're gonna keep it exactly as it is, and we're gonna have, like, little, like, diagrams.

[Shoshana Bean]

Here's what she actually meant. Nope, that was wrong. Please.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I love us trying to do sp.

[Shoshana Bean]

I'm. Usually.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You're better at it than I am.

[Shoshana Bean]

I usually am.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I'm just, like, smiling.

[Shoshana Bean]

I love watching sports documentaries, and I love sports for that reason, because what we do is so under appreciated and so underestimated in terms of, like, our athleticism and what we endure. And so I love watching it because I'm like, that is what we. And so I love the mentality and the psychology of sports, and it's just very helpful for me. So anyway, that was wicked.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Bing. But I mean, just to, like, make you talk a little bit more about it, I mean, because this was your first. No, we like all the sounds. We're in New York. Embrace it. But how was it for you to then, like, you know, embrace being a leading lady and being the leader of the show?

[Shoshana Bean]

I mean, embracing being the leader of the show was easy for me because I had watched. I had just come from hairspray watching Harvey and Marissa do that.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yes.

[Shoshana Bean]

So I felt like I. I observed, I absorbed. I knew what to do. So that. And I also, you know, that weekend gifted me an immediate opportunity to, like, step up and be the backbone. I didn't get. Wasn't gonna take the luxury of, like, being emotional and freaking out. Like, I had a job to do.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right.

[Shoshana Bean]

And not. And it wasn't about me. It was. This was one of those moments where, like, you are the quarterback. You run the play. Sorry.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah, here we go.

[Shoshana Bean]

You are a cog.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

This is a good one, though. You're doing good with this one.

[Shoshana Bean]

Just run it, call it and run it. And so it was a great opportunity to practice sort of like not being emotional, not making it about you, and just doing the job and then so being. That was easy. I think stepping into the power of what I was gifted was harder for me for a number of reasons. One, I knew I wasn't their first choice, and I knew that. So that was hard for me to reconcile being number two and feeling like I could own it and step into it. I thought, like, I'm just their placeholder until Eden. Until I run out my year. And Eden can be here for after she's done with Brooklyn, which was the

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

show she was doing at the time.

[Shoshana Bean]

That's why she couldn't. Was Adina's original standby and also originated

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

the role before Adina stepped in, right?

[Shoshana Bean]

No, that was Stephanie.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Stephanie Block. Oh, my God. The community of Elphabas.

[Shoshana Bean]

So many.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

So many of them.

[Shoshana Bean]

So, yeah, they had initially been like. Had officially passed on me taking over and let us know that. And then were like, auditioning people above me. I could hear them from my standby dressing room. So in my mind, I had already left the building. And I don't know if I had let it go. It was pretty painful because I wanted it really bad. And I was like, okay, I'll just give my, you know, four weeks notice or whatever it's supposed to be. You know, I've done my time as a standby. I'm good. And then something very interesting happens when you no longer give a fuck. You sort of liberate yourself to be your fullest self sometimes. And something happened. And Adina was out randomly one night. And I went on and I wasn't trying to prove anything to anybody anymore. I knew it wasn't my job. And I went on and just was free.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I felt a little like completely free. Free to do irreverent.

[Shoshana Bean]

We'll go back to irreverence. I just was liberated because I wasn't trying to get anything. And

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I love.

[Shoshana Bean]

Mark Platt was in the house that night and apparently he called the team and was like, what the fuck are we doing? We have her right here. And the next day or a day or two later, I got the offer.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, that's incredible.

[Shoshana Bean]

Which is a beautiful way that it all happened. And I. And I know that they felt certain about their choice at that point, but I couldn't get it out of my mind that I wasn't.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

That you weren't the first choice. Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

And so I really just decided that I was simply a Replacement that I wasn't. That I couldn't really step in fully and, like, own the power of that. So then, like, six months in, and I never worked with Joe. I. We were put in by stage managers and associate director, and he came in about six months into my run when Megan had also taken over for Jennifer. So Megan was a month or two into her run, and I was about six months into mine, and he was kind of like, what are you doing? What is this? And what I didn't want to say was, like, I'm just sort of barfing up of my version of what I saw.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

This is. Joe Mantella came in and said the director of the show was like, what are you doing?

[Shoshana Bean]

What is this? Like, what?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, interesting.

[Shoshana Bean]

Basically, like, what I thought was my version of what Idina was, which was not justified. It was just like, I'm a replacement. I'm just supposed to emulate, like, you know, do my interpretation of what I saw. And he was like, none of this.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

What was he not seeing?

[Shoshana Bean]

Like, he just was like, what are you doing with your arms? And I want to be like, that's the choreography, isn't it? Like, the wizard. But mine was not, in me of front, informed. And hers obviously had been built for months and months of, like, Mine was just not informed. It was simply so it at that point. And he only was with us for, like, a day or two. And I felt really like, oh, God, I'm failing at this. I'm terrible. I'm terrible. But what I took away from it was like, I think I just have to really just let this be mine now.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

And that's when I did so. But it took me a long time because I just didn't feel like ultimately I diminished what my gig was. I was like, I'm a replacement. Not. I am now the new Elphaba.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right.

[Shoshana Bean]

I'm just a replacement.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I go. I wake up every day saying, I am the new Alphabet.

[Shoshana Bean]

You do?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

That's how I wake up every day.

[Shoshana Bean]

God, it's like, you're like, it's my.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's my motto.

[Shoshana Bean]

It's like, you're lying.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

My mantra. I am the new Alphabet.

[Shoshana Bean]

The new Alphabet. So, yeah, it took me a second, but then I had more fun, and then I got to do the tour, and I really had more fun. And, yeah, it's a beast of a role.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Shoshanna tells me about her role in the new musical the Lost Boys on Broadway. And I share a hilarious story that happened during a performance of my one man show. True. Okay, be right back. I am always trying to cook more at home. The one thing I do know is if you start with really good ingredients, everything just gets easier. That's exactly why I love Wild Alaskan company. They deliver wild caught perfectly portioned seafood straight to your door and it makes cooking fish at home feel so incredibly easy. What sets them apart is that everything is 100 wild caught, never farmed, no antibiotics, no GMOs, no additives. Just really high quality seafood food that you can feel really good about eating. It's also frozen right off the boat to lock in flavor and texture. And everything is sustainably sourced from Alaska. My current favorite is their sockeye salmon. It has this gorgeous vivid red color and such rich flavor that it barely needs anything. The other night, Justin was showering me with praise about this salmon that I made for him. It was so amazing. It's the best he's had in so long. I didn't tell him. I just sprinkled on a little salt, olive oil and lemon juice that that was it. It was just the really great fish. That was a star. Although I do a very nice pan sear, if I do say so myself. So I did that part. And if you're trying it for the first time, there's no risk. If you're not completely satisfied with your first box, Wild Alaskan Company will give you a full refund, no questions asked. Not all fish are the same. Get seafood you can trust. Go to wild alaskan.com/jtf for $35 off your first box of premium wild CA seafood. That's wild alaskan.com JTF for $35 off your first order. Thanks to Wild Alaskan Company for sponsoring this episode. If you're a small business, the right hire can be make or break. It's not just about finding someone talented. It's about finding someone talented who also gets it. Someone who understands your needs and actually makes things easier, not harder. If I had to hire someone tomorrow, which I don't, thank God, but if I did, I wouldn't want to waste time sorting through a pile of resumes from people who don't really understand what we do, I'd want to reach the right people right away. And that's why I'd use Indeed Sponsored Jobs when you need the right person. Not just another cv, that is a job for Sponsored Jobs. Sponsored jobs posted directly on indeed are 95% more likely to report back a hire than a non Sponsored Job and and join the 3.3 million employers worldwide that use Indeed to connect with quality talent that fits their needs. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Less stress, less time, more results. When you need the right person to cut through the chaos, that is a job for Indeed. Sponsored Jobs and listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsor job credit to help your job get the premium status it deserves@ Indeed.com podcast go to Indeed.com podcast right now and support our show by saying you heard about Indeed on this podcast. Dinner's on me. Indeed.com podcast terms and conditions apply. Hiring do it the right way with Indeed. And we're back with more dinners on me.

[Shoshana Bean]

One of the fucking kids, the kid who plays my son. Yeah, we're sitting on the stage one day in tech. So you sit around a lot, right? Waiting for cues. And he, I said, have you, have you walked down the Judy Garland staircase? And he's like, yeah, I do. And every time I do, I like sing Judy or whatever. And I was like. And he's like, did you ever meet her?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No.

[Shoshana Bean]

It's like, I don't know.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

How old do you think I am?

[Shoshana Bean]

I have so many questions about it. But yeah, I was like, well, you're

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

dead to me spiritually. You might meet her tonight as she haunts your dressing room.

[Shoshana Bean]

That's right. Our 15 year old. My. The kid who plays my youngest son, 15 tomorrow, Benjamin Kjak. He said when we were doing an interview last week and he said, I think everyone's gonna come and everyone's gonna be able to see themselves in one character or another. And I was like, it was such a profound, simple, yet profound statement because I really do think that that to your point, like that everyone is going to get what they need to see and what they need to get from this. And weirdly, I think it's, it's very timely. Even though the story is older. It's really timely and it's beautiful. And it is about belonging and finding your people and finding your family and finding your community and whether that's outside of the four walls of your home or not. And I think to your point, anyone who's been othered, which doesn't leave many people out, you know, we'll find that and feel that. And it's. There's this other moment that isn't like that, but it is like a levitation of sorts. And my son kept trying to explain

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

to me, the son of the show. Yeah, you didn't Have a child?

[Shoshana Bean]

No, I don't have a child. My kid in the show. LJ was trying to explain to me how it happens, and it just didn't make any sense to. To me. And then after he finished that day of tech, the stage manager sends out this email that's like, great day. Like, here's a picture of LJ doing this thing attached, and it's me as Elphaba. The photo is attached. I was like, is this a joke? And he's like, shoshana. He's actually on. Am I allowed to say this? He's on an actual Elphaba jib that has been reconstructed, but we got it from, like, the Korean production of Wicked. And I'm like, what?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

That is so funny.

[Shoshana Bean]

You've been trying to explain this thing to me, and basically, I'm very intimate with this equipment. And I did not know Judy Garland anyway.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, my God.

[Shoshana Bean]

I'm officially. Yeah, Granny, listen, I'm officially.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You are officially Granny. I do love that you're in the palace, and I think that Judy Garland's spirit is going to be with. With you in the most beautiful ways, just blessing you in this process. Tell her I said hi.

[Shoshana Bean]

Okay.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

In the new Palace Theater.

[Shoshana Bean]

Come see us.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Come see it. Lost Boys. So by the time this comes out, you will almost be opening or opened in these, like, precious few days. Like, before you shared it with an audience. Like, what are you most excited for? What are you most, like, nervous about? Like, what do you hope for with the response I've seen now, listen, it's interesting that you're, like, having a little anxiety about it. This. This moment that you're in right now is my absolute favorite of the process. I do love having an audience, but there's that moment, like, where you know what you're doing and you're feeling itchy, like you need more people in the room, but yet, like, no one's giving you their opinion about it yet. And it feels so sacred still.

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah. And this show in particular is the most sacred because a. It's never had an audience, a mounting of a production anywhere. And also our team has done this really interesting job of just keeping a lid on everything that's happening behind those doors. Nobody knows what we're doing. They hear rumors and cryptic talk about what's happening, but they don't know. So it really is.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And the minute that preview audience happen, the whole world. The whole world. Because there's these chat boards now.

[Shoshana Bean]

That's what's tough. So I think that's why I'M nauseous. Is. It's like we live in a very different world now where previews used to be a time for working. You kind of got to come out the gate swinging. So I'm a little nervous about that because the show is massive. It's so massive. So I think that I'm in this weird phase of, like, wanting to speed up to that moment when we can finally feel an exchange and. And get a sense of what we have.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

But I'm also to your point, know that this moment is still. It's still ours. It's still sacred. It's still untouched. And it doesn't. It's never gonna happen again. We're never gonna be intact together again.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No.

[Shoshana Bean]

And I know. I mean, I was saying this to them. Feels like yesterday in the rehearsal room. Like, guys, I'm the eldest in the room. I've been doing this a long time. I know when something feels special. This is special. You're not crazy. Don't miss a single second of this. And we're already getting ready to open previews.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

And I feel like I just said that, so I am aware of how precious every phase of the process is. And yet I still. It's must be like childbirth. Like, I still forget.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

That it is nauseating. It is a. It is a roller coaster poster.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's so right that you do forget.

[Shoshana Bean]

It's terrifying.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I'm experiencing that now with my play. Like, just anxiety after a show if things didn't go up. I saw someone sleeping, like, you know, oh, my God.

[Shoshana Bean]

And they're right there for.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right there.

[Shoshana Bean]

How dare they. Coffee.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

The thing is, it's a very warm room because it's an old house.

[Shoshana Bean]

Crank the ac. Come on, guys.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

There's no ac. And we've been opening windows, like, you know, because it's been so cold out. Although now it's warming up a little bit. But we have this table where some people sit, and, like, they're basically on the set. There's chairs.

[Shoshana Bean]

People sit on the set. That's where I want to be when I come across.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, do you?

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Okay.

[Shoshana Bean]

Put me in the set. Are you. Interact with me. Are you gonna, like Daniel Radcliffe? Me? Am I gonna be in it?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Basically. But there was a woman who was, you know, a little older, and she was sort of like, you know, just listening with her eyes closed. Maybe I'm just gonna tell myself, that's generous. And I was like, honey, like, in my head, I'm like, everyone, you're on the set. Like, you Can't. No. And so I walk by her at one point. Yeah. I just sort of put my hand on her shoulder, just rub her back like. I see you, like.

[Shoshana Bean]

And then she wake up.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, yeah. She did not fall back asleep.

[Shoshana Bean]

And I. Jessie, that is legend.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah, Well, I mean, for you.

[Shoshana Bean]

You. Absolutely.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

She was on the set.

[Shoshana Bean]

Ma', am. You're in the show.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

Not the gentle.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Just a sh. Papa's here.

[Shoshana Bean]

Did people laugh?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Not if they even noticed. Actually, I think I was the only person that noticed.

[Shoshana Bean]

I have to do my research because I don't know much about him, but I know that my parents had the book.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

On the bookshelf growing. No. Wasn't it just called Capote? Wasn't there a book.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Well, there was a movie Capote that folks remember.

[Shoshana Bean]

Maybe his name was just huge on the spine because it's, like, emblazoned in my mind.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yes. No, Capote, like, he's. I mean, he's written several great books, but. In Cold Blood. In Cold Blood.

[Shoshana Bean]

Okay. It's the big one.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah. That's one I had to read in high school.

[Shoshana Bean]

I want to come knowing more than I do. I mean, I'm embarrassed.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You can watch Philip Seymour Hoffman play him in the film that he won an Oscar for, and he's incredible.

[Shoshana Bean]

Okay.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah. I mean, that's. That's what I would watch.

[Shoshana Bean]

Okay.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Breakfast, Tiffany's. Who wrote. Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

Oh, yeah. Well,

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Shoshana and I talk about our early days in New York. And Shoshana tells me about a few of the day jobs she took on before getting her big break on Broadway, including checking in theater legends at Equinox. Okay, be right back. Get business done with the new American Express graphite business cash unlimited card with unlimited 2% cash back on all eligible purchases. Unlimited 5% cash back on flights and prepaid hotels booked through American Express. Travel online. And a flexible spending capacity that can grow with your business. You'll have the confidence to keep building. Apply today and earn a welcome offer of $1,500 cash back after you spend $50,000 in qualifying purchases on your new card within the first six months of card membership terms apply. Learn more at GO MX Graphite. And we're back with more dinners on me. When you were in school in Cincinnati, did you. How did you find, like, were you able to find, like, kind of a pocket in the musical theater world? Like, what were you. What type of songs were you singing? What were you like, I Just. I can't imagine you doing, like, musical theater class. Let me just say that.

[Shoshana Bean]

You can't.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No.

[Shoshana Bean]

Well, you're probably spot on because I was so resistant. So resistant. I must have been just impossible. Must have been. I think that I. Again, irreverence. Like, I just wanted to be different. So I dug so deep to find things that no one was doing, no one had heard of. Like, I remember finding this song called Sweet Time, Maybe from Raisin the Musical. Like. Right, Raisin. Like, I would dig and dig because back then you had to go to the library, check out a maximum of two 10 CDs, or, you know, five libretta. What do they call scores? And. Yeah, and I would just pour over these things and just dig to find things that no one was gonna do or had done in an effort to just not be like anybody else and to find the most soulful stuff I could find, you know?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right, right, right.

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And then when you came to New York, I mean, it's not lost on me that the first thing you did was Godspell. Like, kind of the first big thing.

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And I mean, I just. I mean, listen, anyone can go find this recording on Spotify or itunes. I mean, Right.

[Shoshana Bean]

I don't know where it is, actually.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, I think it's definitely available.

[Shoshana Bean]

Do you think it is? I think it's on YouTube, but I don't know that it's a streamer.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You just gotta, like, Google Shoshana Bean. Godspell. It was. Was it Bless My Soul. Was that your song?

[Shoshana Bean]

Bless the Lord.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Bless the Lord.

[Shoshana Bean]

They let me rip.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

They shoot in all over the place. Exactly. What probably was holding you back. They were like, okay, you must have felt like you were bursting out of the gate. Like a bowl bursting into the pen.

[Shoshana Bean]

I mean, it sounds like it when you listen to it. You're like, great. Did you have to put everything in there? Yes, you put it all in everything.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

But it does sort of feel like, okay, like, I'm. I'm in the show. It's musical theater, and I'm going to. Like, I've been hired to do what I do, and you. You've laid it all out. But I do feel like that marked your territory in New York. I mean, because people noticed. I mean, it was.

[Shoshana Bean]

Did we meet during that? Did you come to that?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I didn't see it. I never saw it. I just remember hearing about it and then, like, listening to recordings of it. I'm like, oh, my God. Like, that's something that could be done in musical theater. Like, I had never heard anything like that.

[Shoshana Bean]

Question mark.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Well, it was, but it was.

[Shoshana Bean]

They were. I mean, that whole thing was. I keep using the word irreverent. That was peak. We were in an office building. Like, so when you talk about.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Where was it at?

[Shoshana Bean]

Oh, I can tell you. It was like, learn English. Like, it was on 34th street, like, across from that Victoria's Secret that used to be there forever on the corner.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right.

[Shoshana Bean]

Like on this fifth floor of an office building where you could learn English and. Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And that's where the theater was all.

[Shoshana Bean]

She shared an op. Like a meeting room as a dressing room. People would put up curtains for us to change. We'd have to take them down because the next business day, they would be like. It was. It was so.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, I didn't know it was that.

[Shoshana Bean]

We would walk by. File cabinet stick, baby. Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Really?

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah. I had two jobs to. I went to a restaurant and at Equinox, to be able to afford my Off Broadway drink atlas.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh, yeah, I remember.

[Shoshana Bean]

Do you remember it on Central Park South?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I do, yeah. And at equinox, the gym, 91st and Broadway. You're a trainer.

[Shoshana Bean]

No, I worked the front desk. I worked the front desk. Justin did, too, by the way, Checking.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

He did, yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

Checking people in. And that's where I, like, met Mark Kudish. Fell in love with Mark Kudis. I had biggest crush on Mark Kudish. Who else went there that was, like, from the Broadway world. So many people. Mandy worked out there. Petinkin.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Mandy Patinkin.

[Shoshana Bean]

Who else? A million people. I'm blanking right now.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's so funny. Justin, when he worked at Equinox, he worked at the one in West Hollywood and he. Oh, God, what is his name?

[Shoshana Bean]

That's like a different breed of.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah, for sure. But people would come in. Like, Queen Latifah would come in and he would just. Yeah, he would.

[Shoshana Bean]

It's a gig.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

If you're moving to the city and you need a gig, pick the writing foot off everything. Oh, yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Okay. So you were working those two jobs and then doing God spelling. An office building on the fifth floor and, like, near Penn Station.

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah. Then we moved uptown to the York Theater.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Because that's when I say I did know it went to theater.

[Shoshana Bean]

And that's when life really changed. No, nothing changed.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

The York Theater, which is basically in the basement of a church.

[Shoshana Bean]

Right.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You went from the fifth floor of an office to the basement of a church.

[Shoshana Bean]

That's right.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Okay. Right, right, right.

[Shoshana Bean]

So by moving up, I meant down

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

yeah, you meant down, but uptown.

[Shoshana Bean]

We had a great time though. How's your husband? I miss him. I never hear from him.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh my God, that's so funny.

[Shoshana Bean]

The coasts have finally come between us. It's never been an issue.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And now he said he wanted to make sure that I gave you his love.

[Shoshana Bean]

How are the boys?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Our children are good.

[Shoshana Bean]

They look huge. You posted something of them from behind.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

We got to stop watering them.

[Shoshana Bean]

God, they tell me the funniest thing that Becket has said recently. Please.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Oh my God.

[Shoshana Bean]

Cuz that kid's brain is like.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Well, the other day he, he woke up, he, you know, I'm doing this play and I'm tired and I'm just trying to sleep. And he woke me up at 4:30 in the morning and I was like, you've got to go back to bed. Like you just have to go back to bed. He's like, how could I possibly go back to bed when I'm so excited about the day? I'm like, can you imagine being that. Just like excited to live another day? It's so great.

[Shoshana Bean]

It's beautiful.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I was like, what's. And then I was thinking like, what is happening today that I don't know about?

[Shoshana Bean]

It's just a day.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It's just a day.

[Shoshana Bean]

Oh my God. That's why they hate going to bed.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

They don't want to miss out. I have to like literally say like, we're all going to bed, everyone's sleeping, you're not missing out on anything.

[Shoshana Bean]

I freaking love that.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It used to be like that where I was like, I don't want to miss out. I'm fomo. Like I'm having fomo. And now I'm like, please put me

[Shoshana Bean]

to sleep, Please can I miss out? Yeah, I know, I know. I do feel that feeling when we're starting a new show again though. Like when we start our rehearsals, I

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

like, I get so excited. Me too. Me too. Yeah.

[Shoshana Bean]

So we do still. We're not dead yet. Not dead inside.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No, we're not dead inside. And you're going to feel this in a few days when you have your first audience. But yeah, few days. Get ready. I don't know if you're the same way. I mean, when I have my first show in front of an audience, after you've been rehearsing in a room and in like sort of sacred space for all, and you finally bring those people in, that exchange of energy, maybe you're not feeling the same way because your face is saying, I'm really nervous Anxiety. But I have the most insane rush of energy. Like, I can't fall asleep till like 2 in the morning. It's crazy.

[Shoshana Bean]

No, it's a big.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And it wears down after a while. Like, I get used to it. But like, that first time in front of an audience, it's gonna be like

[Shoshana Bean]

that for a minute with the show. I think. I think it's gonna. I think I'm just. They keep posting world premiere, world premiere. And I realized, like, it never got an out of town tryout.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right.

[Shoshana Bean]

Like, and I haven't done anything like that. Like, Mr. Saturday Night got an out of town tryout. Not with me. But they knew what they had. Hell's Kitchen. We ran off Broadway for three months before we transferred to Broadway, so we knew what we had in a smaller space.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And what about Hairspray? Was that done?

[Shoshana Bean]

We did Seattle for months. Yeah, we've been talking about that a lot lately. Because this. This show feels a lot like Hairspray in that way. Just like a magical curation, an alchemy of people. Just like really special from top to bottom.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

That show is so special.

[Shoshana Bean]

Yeah.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I mean, that. That must have been like. That was kind of the first thing that, like, you know, that was your first original musical. That was the first.

[Shoshana Bean]

What was yours?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Well, on the. On the Town was my first show. I got paid to do. I got my equity card.

[Shoshana Bean]

Oh, my God.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And then.

[Shoshana Bean]

Weren't you like, a principal?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah, I was like, you got your

[Shoshana Bean]

card being a principal, you're so fancy.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I know. Yeah, it is pretty fancy. I'm not gonna lie about it.

[Shoshana Bean]

You shouldn't. No more lies.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

No more lies. That was more from my conversation with Shoshana Bean. If you haven't heard our full conversation yet, make sure to check it out on Dinner's on Me. This episode of Dinner's on Me was recorded at Miriam's on Manhattan's Upper west side. Next week on Dinner's on Me. You might know him from the Killing. He's also on two amazing shows right now for all mankind. On Apple TV and Netflix's Detective Hole, it's Joel Kinnaman. We'll dive into acting in Swedish for the first time in over a decade. What it's like to age 40 years on screen and why he's especially excited about what's next in his ever evolving career. Dinners on Me is a production of Sony Music Entertainment and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch, our showrunner. Is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Alyssa Midcalf. Sam Baer engineered this episode. Hans Dale, she composed our theme music. Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tameka Balance Kolasny and Justin Makita. I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.

[Shoshana Bean]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

a message for everyone paying big wireless way too much.

[Shoshana Bean]

Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

But that's weird.

[Shoshana Bean]

Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try. @mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full terms at mintmo. Com.