Dinner’s on Me with Jesse Tyler Ferguson
Episode: Side Dish: More with Patton Oswalt
Date: January 1, 2026
Restaurant: Levant Bistro and Bakeshop, Echo Park, LA
Guest: Patton Oswalt (Actor, Comedian)
Episode Overview
In this heartfelt and humorous "Side Dish" episode, Jesse Tyler Ferguson sits down with Patton Oswalt for an intimate conversation that explores love, grief, parenting, and the oddities of fame. Over a meal at Levant Bistro, the two discuss Patton's creative marriage proposal, the ongoing impact of his late wife Michelle McNamara's legacy, navigating tough parenting conversations, and their most memorable and awkward celebrity encounters. The episode is packed with personal anecdotes and moments of warmth, vulnerability, and laughter.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Patton’s Creative Marriage Proposal
[03:55–06:27]
- Board Games and Family: Patton explains his and Meredith Salinger’s shared love for board games, particularly "Quirkle" (a Scrabble-like game with colored tiles).
- Patton: “I took a bag of quirkle tiles… had seven custom tiles made saying, ‘Will you marry me, Meredith Salinger?’...” [04:36]
- Daughter’s Crucial Involvement: Patton’s daughter, Alice, was a key part of the proposal, reflecting the importance of including his child in this major life event after the loss of her mother, Michelle McNamara.
- Patton: “She had to be. It’s not just me—this has to be as much about them as it is about you.” [05:43]
2. Talking to Kids About Death & Grief
[06:38–09:17]
- Navigating Child Loss: Jesse shares his experience explaining the death of his mother to his young son, relating to Patton’s discussions in his special “Annihilation” about telling Alice about her mother’s passing.
- Jesse: “I was suddenly confronted with, how am I going to discuss this big thing with this child with such a young brain?” [07:18]
- The Limits of Metaphor: Both agree that metaphors (e.g., “gone to another place”) can confuse young children and sometimes make the subject feel more ominous or avoidant.
- Patton: “If you use metaphors or vague language... you subconsciously give them the idea that this is a bad, dangerous thing…” [08:55]
3. Michelle McNamara’s Role in Capturing the Golden State Killer
[13:08–15:36]
- Documentary Reflections: Jesse discovered the depth of Michelle’s involvement through the documentary “I'll Be Gone in the Dark."
- Patton: “She was writing a book… gathered up her team to finish it… The week the book came out, we started the book tour… that’s when he got captured, which was so bizarre.” [13:26]
- Power in Naming: Patton explains Michelle coined “The Golden State Killer,” drawing renewed public attention to the case and arguably influencing the investigation.
- Patton: “He was never given a cool name… Michelle came up with Golden State Killer, which was one of the things that helped reopen the game…” [14:19]
- Recognition Controversy: He points out irony in law enforcement’s reluctance to credit Michelle while simultaneously using the name she invented.
4. Parenting, Generational Change & Acceptance
[16:04–20:30]
- Alice’s Maturity: Patton notes Alice, now sixteen, possesses a quiet wisdom earned through adversity.
- Patton: “She’s… a little more mature… there’s this gentle kind of like, who cares?” [16:05]
- Young Kids & Social Norms: Jesse describes his kindergarten-age son’s sudden declaration, “Mermaids are not for boys,” confronting inherited biases.
- Jesse: “He told me… ‘mermaids are not for boys.’ And we were both like, what? I beg your pardon?” [17:00]
- Gen Z’s Open Attitude: Patton celebrates the younger generation’s casual acceptance of queerness and pronouns, contrasting with past eras where such things were stigmatized or compartmentalized.
- Patton: “The idea of someone being straight and gay… there’s not a club for that thing anymore, because no one cares.” [18:10]
- Patton: “There’s evolution going on whether you want it to or not.” [19:34]
- Societal Progress: The conversation touches on the futility of reactionary backlash—as Patton puts it, “dinosaurs in tar… making the loudest noises before they go under.” [19:34]
5. Dealing with Fame and Conspiracy Theories
[20:39–22:16]
- Unexpected ‘A-List’ Issues: Patton shares being featured in a QAnon conspiracy documentary alongside Oprah and Tom Hanks, leading to bemused reactions from his agents.
- Patton: “They put up a picture of Oprah and then Tom Hanks and then me… My agents freaked out…” [21:15]
- Google’s Strange Legacy: Jesse riffs on being incorrectly listed as an ex-boyfriend of Zachary Quinto due to tabloid speculation.
- Jesse: "If you Google like, Zachary Quinto’s ex-boyfriends, I’m there… I’m not taking off this list." [22:02]
- Patton’s take: “A bad list to be on. No, I’m thrilled.” [22:04]
6. Celebrity Encounters: Fandom from Both Sides
[23:10–28:53]
- Starstruck by Lorde: Jesse tells the story of his husband Justin meeting Lorde at an Oscar party, becoming so overwhelmed he cried in front of Cate Blanchett.
- Jesse: “He disengages from the greatest actress we have, because Lorde is there… starts crying…” [24:53]
- Patton: “This is like a Modern Family plot.” [25:22]
- Patton Fumbles Meeting Walter Hill: Patton describes nervously accosting legendary director Walter Hill at a screening and then regretting it for days.
- Patton: “…even as I started talking my head’s like, leave him… it basically turned into… thank you, thank you, and then I just went away…” [26:35]
- A Cherished Moment with Angela Lansbury: Jesse fondly recalls a surprise conversation with Angela Lansbury, cherishing it especially after her passing.
- Jesse: “I ended up talking to her for 15 minutes and having the most lovely conversation… I’m so glad I had that time with her.” [28:19, 28:52]
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On parenting through loss:
“This has to be as much about them as it is about you.”
– Patton Oswalt, [05:43] -
On generational shift in acceptance:
“There’s evolution going on whether you want it to or not.”
– Patton Oswalt, [19:34] -
On accidental internet infamy:
“I was next to Oprah… So there’s always that weird push-pull of like, okay, is this bad or is this good?”
– Patton Oswalt, [21:25] -
On being part of Zachary Quinto’s rumored dating history:
“Not a bad list to be on. No, I’m thrilled. Put me on that list!”
– Patton Oswalt, [22:02–22:08] -
On meeting a childhood idol:
“I ended up talking to [Angela Lansbury] for 15 minutes and having the most lovely conversation… I’m so glad I had that 15 minutes with her.”
– Jesse Tyler Ferguson, [28:53]
Timeline of Key Segments
- [03:55–06:27] – Patton’s proposal & the importance of including his daughter
- [06:38–09:17] – Discussing death honestly with children
- [13:08–15:36] – Michelle McNamara’s Golden State Killer work
- [16:04–20:30] – Parenting, generational change, and societal shifts
- [20:39–22:16] – The strange side of fame (QAnon, celebrity lists)
- [23:10–28:53] – Celebrity fangirling: Lorde, Walter Hill, Angela Lansbury
Tone and Style
The conversation is open, playful, and gently self-deprecating, weaving between humor and emotional candor. Jesse and Patton create an inviting and relatable atmosphere, sharing not just anecdotes but genuine feelings and vulnerabilities. Their chemistry makes for a warm and insightful listen, filled with laughter, empathy, and the kind of real talk that can only happen over a shared meal.
Summary prepared for those looking to catch up on the best moments and insights from Dinner’s on Me: Side Dish with Patton Oswalt.