Andrew Santino: No Bad Lies, Only Good Banter

Summary

Disgraceful with Grace O'Malley

Episode: Andrew Santino: No Bad Lies, Only Good Banter
Release Date: June 19, 2025

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Introduction

In this vibrant episode of Disgraceful with Grace O'Malley, host Grace welcomes the esteemed comedian Andrew Santino, known for co-hosting the Bad Friends podcast alongside his sister, Nora O'Malley. The episode delves into their dynamic sibling relationship, Andrew's comedic journey, and his insights into the evolving landscape of comedy.

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Sibling Relationship and Personal Dynamics

Grace and Andrew kick off the conversation by exploring their unique sibling bond, highlighting a significant nine-year age gap that initially separated their friendship.

Andrew Santino [02:08]: "We didn't really. I graduated college before she got to high school, so it was a little. It was kind of."

Despite not growing up together, their adult friendship blossomed, allowing them to support and root for each other in their respective careers. Andrew shares anecdotes about missing his sister's presence during their formative years but expresses deep affection and pride in her achievements.

Andrew Santino [02:29]: "She's the one who parties, dude. She's the one who leads the way. She's the... I love her to death."

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Comedy Careers and Touring Experiences

Andrew provides an insightful look into his life as a comedian, recounting his early days, touring mishaps, and the challenges of performing in diverse cities like New York, Chicago, and Minneapolis. He reflects on the differing comedic vibes of each city and how they shape his performances.

Andrew Santino [02:38]: "It's pathetic."

He humorously discusses adapting to city atmospheres, especially New York's unpredictable weather and crowds, which often influence his comedic material.

Andrew Santino [03:12]: "Just never go back."

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Podcasting and Bad Friends

Transitioning to his podcasting ventures, Andrew elaborates on the evolution of his audience and the symbiotic relationship between his Whiskey Ginger and Bad Friends podcasts. He emphasizes the importance of maintaining a balanced audience demographic as both he and Bobby Lee’s fan bases mature.

Andrew Santino [18:01]: "Our numbers have skewed better as time has gone on to being pretty good. Like, our audience is now... you see them."

The discussion highlights how Bad Friends has organically attracted a diverse listener base, moving beyond a predominantly male or female demographic to include couples and varied groups.

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Interactions with Celebrities and Industry Insights

A substantial portion of the episode is dedicated to Andrew's interactions with famous personalities. He shares memorable moments from his experiences working with icons like Justin Bieber, Taylor Swift, and Flavor Flav, illustrating the unpredictable and often humorous side of celebrity encounters.

Andrew Santino [51:07]: "She was so cool. She was so much better because she was like, you're supposed to be mad that we were fucked up."

Andrew reminisces about his time on the sketch show American TV, detailing the creative processes, improvisations, and the challenges posed by critical reception despite positive personal experiences.

Andrew Santino [39:00]: "We were like the largest FX comedy. I think Hulu."

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Personal Anecdotes and Life Lessons

Andrew opens up about personal struggles and lessons learned throughout his career. From dealing with severe sunburns during tours to overcoming the emotional impact of being cut from a film, he provides a candid look into the resilience required in the entertainment industry.

Andrew Santino [56:04]: "What was your first big gig doing?"

He discusses moments of vulnerability, such as contemplating the impact of being cut from a movie, and the importance of having supportive relationships to navigate these lows.

Andrew Santino [74:27]: "You do some dumb. It's you. I would have done so much worse than whatever that kid did."

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The Evolving Comedy Landscape and Future Projects

Grace and Andrew analyze the current state of comedy, noting the shift towards digital platforms and the decline of traditional stand-up venues. They express concerns over the cancellation of beloved shows and the increasing difficulty of sustaining a career in comedy.

Andrew Santino [91:46]: "I think it's sick. It's like a whole different thing. I, I'd love to tap into."

Looking ahead, Andrew shares his enthusiasm for upcoming projects, including a Special Olympics event and potential new shows that blend philosophy with entertainment, aiming to keep his comedic endeavors fresh and impactful.

Andrew Santino [85:01]: "There's a new... I'm going to start taking out... I'm doing like a home run derby. Celebrity Home Run Derby in the Valley."

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Closing Thoughts

The episode concludes with a heartfelt exchange between Grace and Andrew, underscoring the importance of mutual support and authenticity in their professional and personal lives. Andrew reflects on his journey, the lessons learned, and his unwavering commitment to his craft despite the industry's challenges.

Andrew Santino [103:03]: "Yeah. I think I was a 262 6."

Their conversation leaves listeners with a blend of humor, insight, and genuine camaraderie, encapsulating the essence of what makes Disgraceful with Grace O'Malley a standout comedy podcast.

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Notable Quotes

• Andrew Santino [02:08]: "We didn't really. I graduated college before she got to high school, so it was a little. It was kind of."
• Andrew Santino [02:29]: "She's the one who parties, dude. She's the one who leads the way. She's the... I love her to death."
• Andrew Santino [18:01]: "Our numbers have skewed better as time has gone on to being pretty good. Like, our audience is now... you see them."
• Andrew Santino [51:07]: "She was so cool. She was so much better because she was like, you're supposed to be mad that we were fucked up."
• Andrew Santino [74:27]: "You do some dumb. It's you. I would have done so much worse than whatever that kid did."

---

This episode is a must-listen for fans of Andrew Santino and anyone interested in the behind-the-scenes realities of a comedian's life. Grace and Andrew's engaging dialogue offers both laughter and profound insights, making it a rich addition to the Disgraceful series.

Transcript

[Grace O'Malley]

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[Andrew Santino]

Maybe.

[Grace O'Malley]

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[Andrew Santino]

Coming at you live from a shady Manhattan studio, it's Disgraceful, featuring your gracious ginger host.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hey, watch yourself. Only I can say that. Okay, boss, whatever you say. You pay my bills.

[Andrew Santino]

Give it up for Grace o' Malley.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hi, guys. Welcome back to Disgraceful. I am a nervous wreck right now because I'm here with one of my favorite comedians of all time, the co host of Bad Friends podcast and Whiskey Ginger, my redheaded brother from another mother. Give it up for Andrew Santino, everybody.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Thank you for clapping.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yep.

[Andrew Santino]

It's been. Your sister claps.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. You know, that's why I keep her around.

[Andrew Santino]

I like that you guys are together. I like that you root each other on. My age gap is so big with my sister. We only became friends as adults because it's a nine year difference.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah. It is kind of crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

We didn't really. I graduated college before she got to high school, so it was a little. It was kind of.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, you're the older brother.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. We didn't really know. We didn't really like. I don't really remember her as A kid. Because we weren't.

[Grace O'Malley]

You weren't with her.

[Andrew Santino]

I just.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, cuz you. You weren't even in high school together.

[Andrew Santino]

I left college and then she started high school. But now she's a big girl now. She's a big grown girl now.

[Grace O'Malley]

She's the one with the kids.

[Andrew Santino]

She's the one who parties, dude. She's the one who leads the way. She's the. I love her to death. She lives in Chicago, which I miss. One day.

[Grace O'Malley]

One day. I mean, you've been here 18 years.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. It's sad.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's pretty crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

It's pathetic.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't think I could ever be out here.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you. You know, you can't. Look, when it's really nice, you, you. You get it right away.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

When it's like a. When you do like eight months of beautiful, perfect weather.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You're like, oh, yeah, this is. I get it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I always come when it's shitty out.

[Andrew Santino]

It's like, really, what's going on? Right? I don't know. I bring you.

[Grace O'Malley]

I bring the dark cloud. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Did.

[Grace O'Malley]

I know.

[Andrew Santino]

But you're. But you're not a dark cloud. You're.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I keep it light. I just. I just have bad luck, I think, is what it is.

[Andrew Santino]

I know, but it's going to turn. It's going to change if you stay here for one more week. Keep staying for another week and it'll show.

[Grace O'Malley]

Just never go back.

[Andrew Santino]

Just move in or get a place here. Are you getting a place?

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't think so.

[Andrew Santino]

Do it. Yeah, well, why not?

[Grace O'Malley]

All right, fuck it. I live in L. A now.

[Andrew Santino]

You do?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You live in New York?

[Grace O'Malley]

I live in New York, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Where in New York do you live?

[Grace O'Malley]

I am like Murray Hill.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah. Murray Hill, Yeah. Young, young, hot, cool kids.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I used to say that it's all like frat boys that have just finished college.

[Andrew Santino]

It was just NYU kids, right. Fresh out of college.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so I used to say it was part of the contract for Barstool. You had to live there.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it was a part. It was part of it.

[Grace O'Malley]

And people. I would say that to people like, oh, really? Is that true? I'm like, you are you. That's crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

But it feels like it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I just heard that FX has a new original comedy series coming out called Adults. Adults is a comedy that'll feel relatable if you ever find humor in the struggles of being an adult in 2025, you know, like remembering your full Social Security number or to drink water or Perhaps having your third existential crisis of the month. Best part is that all episodes will be ready for your next weekend. Binge watch FX's adults Wednesdays on FX. All episodes now streaming on Hulu, sponsored by Novo Nordisk.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hola. Hey.

[Andrew Santino]

You speak Spanish, but do you speak liver?

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

People with conditions like obesity, type 2 diabetes or high blood pressure could be at risk for a potentially life threatening liver disease called mash or metabolic dysfunction associated steatohepatitis.

[Grace O'Malley]

Whoa.

[C]

I could be at risk.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'll ask my doctor.

[Andrew Santino]

You're bilingual?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I speak liver now. I'm trilingual.

[Andrew Santino]

Ask your doctor about your risk and if you should be screened for MASH. Learn [e-mail] Murray Hill. Do you guys live together in Murray Hill?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the best.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're doing the. The New York dream kind of thing? She's on the couch right now. We're figuring it out.

[Andrew Santino]

Surfing?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so sad.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, it's good stuff. I did it.

[Andrew Santino]

You have a bed.

[Grace O'Malley]

I.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, okay, so that's not.

[Grace O'Malley]

But I did it.

[Andrew Santino]

You're the dream, she's the nightmare. If it's a comfy couch, you can last. I did a La Z Boy for a while.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

A Lazy Boy in Long beach when I first moved to Southern California.

[Grace O'Malley]

What's a Lazy Boy?

[Andrew Santino]

Is your dad alive?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, he's kicking.

[Andrew Santino]

He is?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Is he a dad? Dad?

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, he's.

[Andrew Santino]

Does he have a chair that he likes?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, he sleeps on the chair that he likes.

[Andrew Santino]

But is it a chair? That's a Lazy Boy? Yeah, that's a Lazy Boy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes, that's the Lazy Boy.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a Lazy Boy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay. So that's what my dad's been doing for 25 years of marriage.

[Andrew Santino]

Your dad is that guy?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, he's that guy. So we're built a little different from him.

[Andrew Santino]

You are?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I'd say.

[Andrew Santino]

Why?

[Grace O'Malley]

Because. I don't know, he doesn't. We don't even need like a couch. We could just sleep just about anywhere on the floor. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Was your dad a great dad?

[Grace O'Malley]

He's doing ketamine therapy.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, that's cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Never believed in drugs, but now he's just. He's getting Kayed out.

[Andrew Santino]

Is Whitney giving him all this advice?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's probably Whitney's like, get seven horses, 14 dogs. Move to the middle of nowhere.

[Grace O'Malley]

Stay young.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Drink the blood and start doing ketamine, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

No. Dude, I. She wanted when. So I opened for her when I was in Boston. When she did her show in Boston, and she wanted my dad to do some time.

[Andrew Santino]

Did he?

[Grace O'Malley]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

Why not?

[Grace O'Malley]

Guilt of association. You don't know what the fuck he's.

[Andrew Santino]

Write him a couple minutes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Not it.

[Andrew Santino]

Where did you guys play in Boston? Wilbur.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, Wilbur. Sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Wilbur.

[Grace O'Malley]

Wilbur.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Wilbur's such a great venue.

[Grace O'Malley]

Fucking say. You. You filmed a special day.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you know, I thought about it. It's funny. I thought for a long time I wanted to. And then, you know, I'm from Chicago, but everyone in the world says I'm from Boston, like, because of birds and red hair. And there's. Everyone's like, you're from Boston.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're not even Irish, are you?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, yeah, I mean, I am, but. But my last name's Italian. My dad's Italian. My mom is Irish. But every time there's guys I've known for a decade, 10 years, that I've been friends with, and they'll be like, well, are you going home to Boston? And I'm like, that's crazy. Fuck, dude, I've known you for so long. And they're like, oh, right. Yeah. No, but Boston will get a special out of me. But the last one I did in February, that comes out in September, I shot at Minneapolis.

[Grace O'Malley]

Why there?

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, I love. Have you been. Have you done Minneapolis? I have one of the best comedy cities, I think, in the country.

[Grace O'Malley]

Unless maybe you're doing it at the Mall of America.

[Andrew Santino]

Did not. Well, that's where you played at Comedy House. House Comedy, yeah. Yeah. That's a different story. When you buy the roller coasters and the Hooters. It's so sad when someone has to pass, like, Applebee's and a Spencer's Gifts to like, hear your shitty jokes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Or if it's worse, if you bomb and then you have to walk by those. Those same carnival rides. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That has. Has a place in Edmonton at the West Ed Mall, which is another huge mall. That same couple. Well, not. Whatever. It's not. Not a couple that owns it anymore, but they had one there. And I had to walk to the West Edmonton mall, and little kids were playing, like, hockey at night inside the mall. It was like, such a sad. It was like Snoopy. It was Peanuts. And I was, like, dragging my feet and like, little families were excited and I was depressed. So sad. It was so sad. Just the ball of dust behind me, the stunt, the stench of bad comedy. But no, Minneapolis, It's. Honestly, it's one of my favorite cities in general.

[Grace O'Malley]

No shit.

[Andrew Santino]

The people are great. Yeah. Because you get A good mix of, like, Minneapolis is a pretty liberal city.

[Grace O'Malley]

Is it?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. But Minnesota can be also quite conservative because it's in the Midwest. So I like the. I like that you get both. I.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's what I say about Chicago.

[Andrew Santino]

I think Chicago, you do get both.

[Grace O'Malley]

You get Midwestern, nice people, but they still live in the city. So it's like a good. It's a good mix.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you get good city people, but you're going to get. Yeah, you'll get a 50, 50 split of, like, conservatives and, like, if you tell a political joke in Chicago, you'll get like a dead. Pretty dead split.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

People liking it. And then some people are going, yeah, and getting mad about it.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, totally. 100.

[Andrew Santino]

Especially if my dad's in the crowd.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, you got one of those dads, too.

[Andrew Santino]

What, that he's a righty. He's a righty.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

All the way, right?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, for sure.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

He's. Yeah. The way he ingests Fox News should be tracked and signed. Like, it should be seen. It's scary.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think my dad could be a correspondent at this point.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he could be on the air.

[Grace O'Malley]

He could just say, like, riddle off whatever he wants to say. And they'd be like, yeah, that's actually.

[Andrew Santino]

He knows everything that comes out of their mouth. Dude, it's crazy. He'll repeat it back. It's like SportsCenter. He's watched, like, the. He's watched the one at noon. He'll watch the same broadcast at five.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's so sad.

[Grace O'Malley]

Doesn't even know it's a rerun. I mean, Shane Gillis has the best bit about that.

[Andrew Santino]

It's like, I better have a Fox News dad than a Fox News mom.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's exactly right. Like, but you'll be. He says you'll be at dinner and he'll just be like, nancy Pelosi's a bitch. Where did they.

[Andrew Santino]

Why would it. Just give me the chicken.

[Grace O'Malley]

What the fuck?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it's my. He's. He likes what he likes. They're old. He's old and white.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, my dad was always like that. But it's a little more enhanced with. With the zippity zap of it all.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. The new. The new administration's got people zip zapping a little bit heavier now. And your dad was shocked.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, Quite literally shocked. And we've caught him on a few message boards.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, really? Is he like a Reddit dog? Yeah, he's out there.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. He's like. He's in the unfinished side of the basement. Riddling off. But it's not riddling. He's more like this.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Finger packing. Yeah, yeah. Hunting, peck.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

As long as he doesn't go too deep. And he starts getting all cr. You know what I mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, you know, he comes around sometimes. I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me tell you about Israel, Palestine. You're like, dad, shut it down. Yeah, shut down.

[Grace O'Malley]

He's got a whole plan.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right, well, that's. That's that. On fathers, I did have this question. Do you think where we could be.

[Andrew Santino]

Related, you and I?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I mean, we look like siblings.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We think the same. You've got a dark, twisted. Yeah. Dark sense of humor. I think I could be from the.

[Grace O'Malley]

Same brood, given that the world's population of redheads is 1 to 2%.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah, that's. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But you consider yourself. You're not really a red. You're like an Auburn. Yeah, you're Auburn. You got the good one. That's the one.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's decent.

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's a nice color.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's good.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't want to be orange, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, orange is tough.

[Andrew Santino]

This was tough.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, this was hard. Well, that's why you had to be funny, right?

[Andrew Santino]

It's. It's why I learned how to run fast. Because you could punch and run. If you could punch and run, I would. I'd punch and run, hit him as hard as I can, and run as fast as I could.

[Grace O'Malley]

Some people would say that's cowardly, but I respect it.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but it was to the face. It wasn't to the back of the head. I would hit you in the face. Yeah, but I didn't want to. I didn't feel like fighting.

[Grace O'Malley]

I got jumped a lot. You ever been. Have you ever been jumped?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Well, I put myself in a situation where I got. It was my fault. Like, a friend was in a fight in college, being an. And we elected to help him, and we were severely outnumbered, so I didn't really get jumped. I got what I deserved.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, that's true.

[Andrew Santino]

We got the shit beat out of us because we thought we were. It was stupid. We should just broke up the whole thing. But we thought we were tough guys.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, you got to do it. You got to give it at least a whirl. That's.

[Andrew Santino]

That's your boy worked, man. You get jumped. You got jumped?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, a few times.

[Andrew Santino]

Why? I don't know.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just had like one of those faces.

[Andrew Santino]

I think that people wanted to fight you.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, There was one time. 21 Savage concert. We were trying to get to the front, just two white girls. I mean, obviously, that's a. We shouldn't have been doing that.

[Andrew Santino]

And you elbowing people on your. Were you up, too?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Well, no, That's a given. Four locos.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what happens, yo. You're loco and. Loco and gross.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's dangerous, dude. You don't do that anymore, right?

[Grace O'Malley]

No. There was something you would have. I could drink 20, 22 beers and be all right.

[Andrew Santino]

You can drink 22 beers?

[Grace O'Malley]

I could. I could drink 22.

[Andrew Santino]

22 beers?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And still be functioning.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'd be. I'd be pretty decent. I'd have to call it a night at 22, but I think I'm good.

[Andrew Santino]

22.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Lights, though. Like a middle light, Bud light.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Nothing crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

Could you do 22 IPAs?

[Grace O'Malley]

I just. I Just starting to sip on those. That's like a.

[Andrew Santino]

You do 10 of those, you'll be in space.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, I just. I mean, the plan is to last all night.

[Andrew Santino]

I know, but, see, not. Not for me. See, I'm 41. It's over. I'm. I'm trying to get as annihilated as I can.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're still drinking?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I haven't met. I mean, it seems like everyone's gone fucking sober.

[Andrew Santino]

Most people are. I take big breaks. I go through the thing where I have to, like, clean out. Once you hit 40, you kind of. It hurts a lot. Yeah, I'm sure my pee changes. That's a dead giveaway.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're talking, like, scent or extreme?

[Andrew Santino]

The scent. The color. Yeah. And when that changes, your body's going, hey, dude, it's over. Chill out. Yeah, yeah, chill out. So I had to learn how to chill out a little bit. I'll go through big breaks, but, like, last night, we had some friends over and we just. We didn't get. You know. But, like, have a couple drinks, sit on the patio, smoke a joint. Like, that's my life now.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'll do that. Good. I like that.

[Andrew Santino]

That I won't go. I'm not going out to the bar and getting wrecked anymore. No, can't.

[Grace O'Malley]

You can't be doing that.

[Andrew Santino]

I wish, though, it would be fun. I see it. It looks fun.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do you get. Do you drink for your shows or. No?

[Andrew Santino]

No. You know, I used to. I used to drink. I used to have a drink on stage, but now I just don't like the way. Especially if I'm doing two shows a night, I just don't like, I'm like, I'm tired by the second one. So now I'll have a cocktail with Zach, this Zach Townsend who usually comes with me. We'll have a drink or two after.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, just wait till. Because now you can't. But when I was 26. Dude, come on.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I mean, well, I, I had to learn the hard way is I was. I was having like seven or eight before I went on stage.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure, whatever makes you loose, baby.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, it was too loose.

[Andrew Santino]

It was too loose. Yeah, you're sloppy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Not good.

[Andrew Santino]

And then sloppy.

[Grace O'Malley]

I look back, I'm like, oh, yeah, no, I'm totally better when I'm not drinking.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, well, no, you inherently. I don't know any. The only people that are better on substances are musicians.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I've never seen a comedian be better when they're like completely gone. I mean, Stan Hope is an anomaly. Stan Hope could be shit faced and still perform well, but he's like our. He's like comedy's Hunter S. Thompson.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

He can ride the fucking lightning. He can be just cooked and keep riding all night long. He's got that in him.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, that's something fantastic.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, it's, it's. He's a special breed. But I don't know. Most comics that get to. You see them get all sloppy on st. And it's fun for like a couple minutes and then you're like, oh, this is tough. But musicians, man, I have some friends that they could be off their rocker and play perfect music.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's wild. You have a lot of famous friends.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no.

[Grace O'Malley]

You don't know any country. But we were talking off.

[Andrew Santino]

No country. I don't know any country artists.

[Grace O'Malley]

Country artists at all.

[Andrew Santino]

Name a country artist.

[Grace O'Malley]

Shania Twain.

[Andrew Santino]

I know her though.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, because she's a pop princess.

[Andrew Santino]

Give me someone new.

[Grace O'Malley]

Let me. Now. Now you got me.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, see, I don't, I don't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Morgan Wallen.

[Andrew Santino]

Nope. Don't know who that is.

[Grace O'Malley]

Jelly Roll.

[Andrew Santino]

I know Jelly Roll. I met him.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I met him.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was gonna say I met him one time. He runs around with some of your pal.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, no, he's a. He's a. He's around comedy. I know him.

[Grace O'Malley]

He's a good guy.

[Andrew Santino]

But he's not traditional country, is he?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I wouldn't. I would.

[Andrew Santino]

He's like. He's like soul, country, rock. He's like every. He's like a bunch. Yeah, like who's the. The who's like the country star.

[Grace O'Malley]

Now I'm.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't like. Do you not like. You don't like country?

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't really like country. I like country. If I'm trying to, like. I'm trying to impress, like, someone who owns a boat or something.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah. Like, that kind of thing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I'll wave a flag around for.

[Andrew Santino]

Are you single?

[Grace O'Malley]

I am.

[Andrew Santino]

You having fun?

[Grace O'Malley]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

No.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, no. I. It's funny. Like, every time that gets brought up, I get all weird. I went on Theo Von's pod, and he's like, yeah. So, you know.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, dude. You got to be single. Moving about, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

So I hit him with, like, an.

[Andrew Santino]

Eel through time and space, man. Just trying to slither in there, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, so you sound just like him, because that's kind of what he said.

[Andrew Santino]

It's so used to him a little different. I said.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just. I really. I just don't. And he said, oh, wow. I bet you're gonna get, like, a lot of, like, sperm coming your way this year, Gracie girl. Yeah. So it was like a. You know, I.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a Theo Vaughn. That's what. He willed it to the universe.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's a classic. They wrote it up.

[Andrew Santino]

When you say you, don't you mean you. You're not interested in it or you.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm just. I'm just not getting it.

[Andrew Santino]

Know you're not getting it, but you. Not getting it, but you want it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, so that's what I. I leaned into it with him and I said, well, I would love to be a. If I could. It's just not there.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, hey, audience.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I know.

[Andrew Santino]

Step it up, dude. Start sucking on these titties.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, it's every week, dude. And all my fans are all women.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't get hit up at all by guys online.

[Grace O'Malley]

No. Unless they've got, like a. Like a. Like, they look like a twisted sister of a clone made in a lab or something. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I should send you my DMs. It's all guys.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's almost 100% men. What up, dog? You're the fucking man. Or you. Or tell Bobby I said what's up? Or eat shit.

[Grace O'Malley]

Or tell Bobby I said what's up?

[Andrew Santino]

That's what's up. And then a lot of times I get. I'll get dicks, too. I get dicks.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I get a good amount of dicks. I've never had one in that way. What's that?

[Grace O'Malley]

You think people are thinking you lean in that way maybe once.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I don't put off gay. I don't give out gay.

[Grace O'Malley]

You give. You give.

[Andrew Santino]

Boston Irish boss. Yeah. See, I don't put out gay. I would put out if I was gay, but I don't put gay out to the world.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But I do think a lot of gay guys try. I have. Have got, like, if I have, like, Mateo on my show or, like, a handsome gay guy, then a group of. A small group of, like, cool gays will hit me up to see if they can bait me. And, you know, I'll open the. I'll open the photo.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, no, of course. You gotta peak. It piques your interest.

[Andrew Santino]

I want to see. Dude, you just gotta see it. I check it out, I compare, I contrast, I take notes. And then I close it in an album. I put it in, I print it out. I put it on my wall. My wallpaper's all dicks. I've never gotten one, like, tit. No, no, no. After all these years.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, because it's mostly met at your shows, correct?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no. It's actually a really good split now. I think, like, Bad Friends has opened up the world of, like. A lot of couples will listen to us together. Like, a guy will introduce it to his wife or girlfriend and vice versa. We'll have a girl who's, like, loves the show and then brings her boyfriend in.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, you know, shit.

[Andrew Santino]

We've gotten that a lot. Our numbers have skewed better as time has gone on to being pretty good. Like, our audience is now. You see them. I'm proud of it that I'm like, oh, fuck. Yeah. It's like, couple.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like, yeah, because that's what you want. You want a 50. 50 split?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. It's almost never, like, all bros or. Or a group of chicks. It's almost always like, hey, this is me and my husband, and this is. This is another cup. They bring, like, five couples.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's their big night.

[Andrew Santino]

This is their dinner night. Yeah, I actually. I actually love it. Our fans are. My fans are slowly getting older, so. When we were younger. Yeah, it's bros. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, I have all girls right now.

[Andrew Santino]

That's good.

[Grace O'Malley]

After shows, the butch lesbians are like, you sure? I'm like, I'm sure.

[Andrew Santino]

Testing the water.

[Grace O'Malley]

They're always trying to turn me.

[Andrew Santino]

You've never tried it. You never tried it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I never tried it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. You know, maybe. Maybe one day. Who's to say?

[Andrew Santino]

No, you're not. It's not you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Not really there. I just, like. I give off. I give it off. I get that. But it's just. It's Not.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not you.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm not ready to catch some dick. Yeah, man.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, while you're in LA LA out there, if you're ever.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

If you're listening and you're free and you really want to.

[Grace O'Malley]

I do this.

[Andrew Santino]

Slam the G. Where are you, Jaden?

[Grace O'Malley]

I should. I should.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm married.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, you're married?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, married to a guy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, good.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I'm married to a woman.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm married to a woman for now. I got to tell you, thinking about just running away and losing my mind. Alone in the woods.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, that's what. That's what they say touring does to someone.

[Andrew Santino]

Now, see, touring wouldn't do it to me. I just think it's the business. The business itself makes you lose your fucking. Touring is kind of fucking great because you get to, like, get away, see new shit. You feel like you're kind of on a mini vacation sometimes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it is nice.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, it's a drag sometimes, but a lot. When you go to certain cities. Let's talk shit. Yeah, let's name our worst cities.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, shit.

[Andrew Santino]

Bury yourself. Fuck up your future somewhere.

[Grace O'Malley]

Nashville kind of fucked me.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's wild, because Nashville is not on my bad list. That's on a good list.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No Zanies.

[Grace O'Malley]

I love Zany's. Yeah, but it was. It was the crowd. It was a New Year's Eve crowd.

[Andrew Santino]

At Zany, and it was like one.

[Grace O'Malley]

Of my first shows on the tour.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude, New Year's Eve fucking sucks.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I was like, damn, God, this is.

[Andrew Santino]

Going to be a long. Everyone's drunk. They're annoying.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No. And you're not. Your background music for their fun. You don't even exist. They didn't go to see comedy. I've done those before. They suck. Nashville as a whole, good comedy town. I don't like the bachelorette parties on the bike. You know, when they bike around the. They. They bicycle the van or whatever.

[Grace O'Malley]

Woohoo city. That's it. That's all they got.

[Andrew Santino]

They're screaming and they're bumping some song and I don't like that.

[Grace O'Malley]

And it's always like. It's like, oh, my God, look at her.

[Andrew Santino]

Look at her.

[Grace O'Malley]

Look at her.

[Andrew Santino]

She's craz crazy. Like, she's crazy. That's all you hear.

[Grace O'Malley]

She's wearing heels. She usually wears flats. That's what's crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

Not that big of a deal.

[Grace O'Malley]

Going nuts for that.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I. I don't like that part of Nashville. Like, that strip of like. Also to be Fair. I don't like country music. So every time we go out down there and someone's like, dude, you got to go to this bar and listen to this band. And we walk in, there's a bleeding. I do not want to hear this.

[Grace O'Malley]

But if you get lucky, you could see Kid Rock acted a fool. That's always fun.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, it was. Found out that it was really funny. We went to his bar after all that, the Bud Light trans stuff happened, you know, and. Oh, yeah, like, shot a case of it in his backyard. Yeah, he was like, anti fucking Bud Light.

[Grace O'Malley]

You know who also quit drinking bud light after 40 years? My father.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he was done.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, no, he's better now. He's. He's came.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't want my dick to fall off.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was like, are you. I'm like, explain it to me. He's like, I. You just don't get it.

[Andrew Santino]

It's so weird to me.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so.

[Andrew Santino]

Kid Rock's bar was still serving Bud Light, though, which I thought was so fun.

[Grace O'Malley]

That is pretty ironic. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so funny.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, yeah, Sales are good, though.

[Andrew Santino]

That's. It's. That I cannot. That is a moment in our history where you're like, wow, how fucking dumb. How dumb were people that they were like, oh, you're trying to market for trans. They gave a can of beer to a trans person as, like, a cool marketing promo.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

They didn't make, like, a fucking line of trans be. It's like, what are you talking about? They did a marketing promo that you didn't like.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's so crazy.

[Andrew Santino]

It's the weirdest shit I never get. People amaze me at how fucking one line they are that you're like, that's. That you. That bothers you that much? That's not even a real thing in your world. You don't even know it exists. Yeah, like, what do you care about?

[Grace O'Malley]

It wasn't for you.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I know. It's so weird.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then I just couldn't believe my dad. So my dad did, like, the most ironic thing of like, I'm done drinking Bud Light. And he's always been American made beer. American guy, Bud Light guy switches to Coronas.

[Andrew Santino]

Whoa. I'm like, dude, made in Mexico, dog.

[Grace O'Malley]

What are you doing, my man?

[Andrew Santino]

It's the Gulf of America now. Coronas are okay to have.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, that's. That's the way he thinks, I'm sure.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what I did. I. I didn't drink Bud Light only because I think it's shit I think it's poo. Poo shit, beer. Give me a Miller Light any day of the week, I'm gonna take a Miller.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's a divorcee kind of.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, dude, I'm from Chicago, and Miller is. Is Milwaukee, so it's right there. Yeah, I'd rather have. I think the order, the pecking order goes Miller, Bud, Coors Light, but Coors heavy, Coors Banquet. Oof. It's tough because champagne of beers, Miller High life is pretty good, but heavy is up there. But I think Coors Original, the best.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think. I think those banquets, you know, they're like, in that bottle.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think people are trying too hard to be cool.

[Andrew Santino]

You think it's like a. It's like a hipster thing. Yeah, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like. It's like musicians thinking they're the shit.

[Andrew Santino]

Right?

[Grace O'Malley]

You're like, oh, I only drink these because, you know, they're classic.

[Andrew Santino]

Right? Right.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like, fuck off.

[Andrew Santino]

What's your mick? What's your alcohol?

[Grace O'Malley]

I go. I go, Bud Light. I go, mcultra.

[Andrew Santino]

I go, cider booze. You don't drink any alcohol? No. Like whiskey or tequila?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I try not to.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what we got to get you to do. You want some dick, you got to get on that stuff. You'll be fishing for dick with that stuff.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, you saw me the other day. I only had a couple beers in me, and that's it. I ransacked you.

[Andrew Santino]

You look like you were having a fun time.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I was having a blast.

[Andrew Santino]

You were humming, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

I had myself. Yeah, no, that was really. I left there being like, geez. Well, I woke up the next morning. I didn't leave there thinking, crazy, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

That was.

[Grace O'Malley]

Until the next morning.

[Andrew Santino]

I was like, you didn't do anything wrong. There's no regret there.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think. I think I just yelled at you. Aren't you supposed to be in fucking Siberia or some shit?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, Korea. Hi.

[Grace O'Malley]

Nice to meet you is what I meant to say.

[Andrew Santino]

I was supposed to be in Korea.

[Grace O'Malley]

Korea.

[Andrew Santino]

But I canceled Korea for really for you. I thought I should stay.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I know.

[Andrew Santino]

That's really sweet, but I did want to go to Korea for the first time. I was really sad. We were supposed to go to Korea, and I was supposed to bring Bob. Bobby and I were going to go, and privately, unfortunately, I can't say why, but the company that we were going to do it with, they didn't. Blah, blah, blah. And I was super butthurt because I was like, think about how fun that would be if me and him got to spend five days in Korea.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's sick. Oh, would you have done it and, like, just gone together and not recorded anything or.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, sadly, we have to film something. It's like, that's so gross. Do I want to not do that?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, yeah, of course.

[Andrew Santino]

But, like, in this day and age, we. What we do is we're pretty good. Like, we don't. We don't flood the Internet with stuff other than our show. The Internet kind of does it for us. But like, on social. I'm not good on social. Like, I don't know. I don't know. People post like, six times a day and clips. I don't. I'm not good at it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I.

[Andrew Santino]

So we don't do that. Bob and I both are the same, where we're not really, like. We're not really good at it, but we would have had one camera person film some fun stuff. Like if we went and did something just to have it, just in case.

[Grace O'Malley]

Just to put on the some.

[Andrew Santino]

But see, no, but the thing with us is sometimes we'll shoot stuff just to see if there's something there. And if we don't use it, we don't fucking use it. If we're like, that sucked. We didn't like that. Yeah, we're not like the Paul brother. We don't need the thing. You know what I mean?

[Grace O'Malley]

Don't even get me started.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I'm not. I don't, like, need it. I'm not even taking a shot at him. I just mean, like, got people. There's certain people that, like, their whole day has to be captured. They try to find a way to use it, which is clever. That's good money on them. But every time we record something, either me or Bob or both, we end up filming and then being like, that was fucking awful. That was in the trash. Yeah, because we don't like public stuff. We like the studio stuff. And then that's it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. No, that's fair.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I just. I'll do the show. The other stuff is like, can we just be.

[Grace O'Malley]

Have you seen the signs for that. That Paul American show?

[Andrew Santino]

Who's that?

[Grace O'Malley]

The Paul brothers. They have a. They have, like.

[Andrew Santino]

I saw a clip on TikTok that their dad was on a plane. Did their dad beat the shit out of them? Right, that's right. That's nice.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, he's a. He's a good guy.

[Andrew Santino]

But. But I heard he was on a plane and they were going to do ayahuasca and he. And they were like, no drinks. He ordered drinks on the jet and they're like, no drinks before ayahuasca. And he's like, buddy, I've done coke, ketamine, whatever the he named Acid. He's like, I'm gonna be. I never obeyed the rules. I was like, this guy is built for. He's built for reality tv.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, people were commenting like, damn, like now we know where the. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. All this. That's just every guy from Boston.

[Andrew Santino]

That's my opinion. It's like, that's just Boston.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's just. It is what it is.

[Andrew Santino]

What part of Boston are you guys from?

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm not. I'm. I'm from like the suburbs of bo.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I just.

[Andrew Santino]

I love Boston so much. That's like my second favorite city.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so first has to be Chicago, right?

[Andrew Santino]

It is, yeah. But I love Boston. There's something about that city. It's always been good to me touring wise. Every time I go, I have like.

[Grace O'Malley]

They think you're one of us.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. They do they? No, they do. But also I just. It's like the nooks. Yeah. I go, I walk around and I turn into Burr. Yeah, dude, the north end. Take me to Nicos. I know. I love Boston. I don't know what it is or something about. And I haven't been far in Boston. Like, it's not like I've explored a lot.

[Grace O'Malley]

I only know in. And you're.

[Andrew Santino]

I only know the nook that I know. But I do love walking the commons when it's nice out.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, it's good stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

It's like the prettiest shit on earth. And what's it north of the park there is Beacon Hill.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh yeah. Where Tom Brady lives.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, right.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do plumbing over there.

[Andrew Santino]

Did he?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, over there.

[Andrew Santino]

Beacon Hill. Yeah, I'll do it. Plumbing at Beacon Hill would be fucking late for dinner. Leave the door open.

[Grace O'Malley]

Quite literally. They're living the dream over there. I'm like. He's like, yeah, they make me take my shoes off. I'm trying to. I'm trying to do plumbing. I got steel toes.

[Andrew Santino]

That's how you know that does. They're rich. They make you take your shoes off.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's interesting. That is a. That is a. When people get enough money at a certain level and you go to a friend's house and they go, could you take your shoes off? You're like, oh, fuck, they're rich. Yeah, that's like, the dead giveaway.

[Grace O'Malley]

Has that ever happened to you where, like, it was your. Your buddy, and they've. They've flipped a switch a little bit.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I've seen so many people. Yeah. I've seen a lot of.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, when do they flip? Like, what. What does. It changes. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Not. I'm not saying it negatively. I just say, like, sometimes you see people get ice. You've seen friends get, like, a lot of success, like, little stuff. They just, you know, they're not goofing anymore.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. You know, you're trying not to be specific here.

[Andrew Santino]

It's hard.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, it's so funny, but I've seen a lot of guys get successful that I'm proud of, that I'm happy that, like, I'll give you the. A good example is, like, Adam Ray and I started. We. I mean, not started together, but we kind of came up together.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, and our class or whatever. And he's been working like a dog for a long time, and to see, like, the Dr. Phil thing for him and what. What's going on for him, like, I'm so happy for him.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. It's fucking awesome.

[Andrew Santino]

Because it's cool to see one of your friends. Like, I don't know. It's cool. There's something about it. After working so fucking hard, you're like, good shit, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. But I'm glad.

[Andrew Santino]

Fuck, yeah, I'm glad. And then there's. Sometimes you see people that continue to succeed and you fucking can't stand them, and you're like, man, why can't that crash?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I know.

[Andrew Santino]

Why can't that plane just fucking crash? You know I'm talking about Whitney. Okay. No, no, no, no, no, no.

[Grace O'Malley]

Not too much on my girl. That's why I'm here.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no, no. She knows. She knows. I give her a big hug and a kiss. I love. I love Whitney. She. I got coveted at her house. I got coveted one at her crib.

[Grace O'Malley]

Sounds like a lot of people did.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, Whitney. Yeah. Let me tell you something. Yeah, dude. Yeah. When he handed out Covid.

[Grace O'Malley]

She's having covered parties.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't still work with her, do you?

[Grace O'Malley]

We haven't in a while. I was opening for it, but no more. Not right now.

[Andrew Santino]

You're flying free. You got to fly solo.

[Grace O'Malley]

I got my. My tour.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what I'm saying. You got to fly solo. You can do the other ones, but you got to. Anybody that's ever worked with me that's open for me, I'm like, you might get a year. You'll get one full tour.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then maybe if I tour again, like later in the year, you might do a couple of dates, but then I cut. I cut them off.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, like, to their benefit.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Because I want them to fly free. Like, my hope is that I can introduce them to enough clubs or people in context that they can get one nighters.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like solos and then slowly grow because I don't want them to get comfortable. And you see some people that, like, are on with someone for a long time and you're like, dude, you gotta go. Like, yeah, that's the only way.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's gotta fly.

[Andrew Santino]

You gotta do it. It sucks, dude. It sucks. I hate doing it. Especially if it's like a really good friend. I'm like, oh, why do I feel like you just.

[Grace O'Malley]

You just stop answering them.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no, dude. Oh. Chris o' Connor's doping for me for a long time. Like, I met him on the road in Indianapolis and he. He's part of Gillis's group, you know, Tommy Pope and those guys. And I met him and we became instant best friends.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And I said at some point, I was like, you do. I gotta. You know, we can't. We can't keep doing it because I want you to go do your own headlining.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like a breakup.

[Andrew Santino]

He died. Is. Dude. But then he did good. Him and Tommy Pope created a show and they did well. And then now he's on tires with Shane, so. And he's doing awesome.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You just want to see your baby birds fly.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, totally.

[Andrew Santino]

You don't want to keep them in the nest?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I mean, that's. That's a good thing you did.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. Well, I'm trying. There's a new. I'm start. I'm going to start taking out. Well, maybe when I tour, when I. When I go back out again. Is Devontra Coleman. Do you know him?

[Grace O'Malley]

No.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, he's fantastic. He's so funny, dude. Certain people you, like, click with right away and you, they're. You're like, oh, that. I like that. I don't even know what that is. But he's a young guy that just moved down here at the store now and he's great, man. He's the only hiccup is that he's black. Outside of that, I really like him.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think you can get over it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we'll see.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we'll see. We'll see.

[Grace O'Malley]

We'll see how it goes. Yeah. Just make sure he's on time, huh?

[Andrew Santino]

He won't be. I tell him the show's at 4. Yeah, 4pm show man, you know, it's Milwaukee.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's a little different.

[C]

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[Andrew Santino]

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Now I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited Premium Wireless for $15 a month month is back. So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills. But it turns out that's very illegal. So there goes my big idea for the commercial. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month required.

[Grace O'Malley]

New customer offer for first 3 months only.

[Andrew Santino]

Speed slow after 35gb of networks busy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Taxes and fees extra.

[Andrew Santino]

See mintmobile.com.

[Grace O'Malley]

I do. I do this silly segment on here where I'm looking for a new co host.

[Andrew Santino]

All right, it's me.

[Grace O'Malley]

So I. I'm. I'm gonna see if you. If you'd pass a test.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, thank you. Let me see.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm gonna give you a list of situations and I want you to tell me who you're calling first. If you need help, either me or Bobby.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. Oh my gosh.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right. So you need a ride home from the airport? I don't have a license. You all right asking for a ride to the hospital?

[Andrew Santino]

You?

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't have a license. Trusting with your passwords or for safekeeping. You okay letting babysit your firstborn child? Bobby hiring a hitman. You Boston going in on a timeshare in Barbados.

[Andrew Santino]

Bobby and I actually have a timeshare in Cabo. No, no, we don't. No, I'm kidding.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was gonna say it's really funny.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no. But you know what's so funny? The only one that I did say him yeah. Was baby yeah. And the only reason why is because Bobby with kids blow will blow your mind.

[Grace O'Malley]

Really?

[Andrew Santino]

He's the sweetest dude it's insane. When he sees babies, he gets like, he. He morphs into the. He's already a child. He's a 52 year old child.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just did Trash Tuesday. They were talking about how they would always clean up Bobby's shit.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Everywhere. I'm like, are you guys allowed to say this is you just guys, you just talk about this?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

He's a podcast.

[Andrew Santino]

He's a big baby. But when he sees kids and when he, like, when, when kids come around, like our friends that have kids that come around, he's a magic man dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

Wow.

[Andrew Santino]

He like embodies this. Sweet. He's. Well, first of all, he' thinks, like, they think he's on the same wavelength.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's what. That's always like that weird, creepy uncle. He was wicked cool when you were young, right? And then you get older, you're like, you never developed Uncle Mark. He's a little different.

[Andrew Santino]

Is he chewing on the couch again? Yeah. Did you have a. Did you guys have a creepy uncle?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, but it was funny.

[Andrew Santino]

We got lucky. We didn't have a creepy uncle. We had a creepy neighbor. My sister didn't like our neighbor. He would say, wild. Like he'd come to the house and I never really noticed it because I, you know, I didn't pay attention.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, also again, for her, you know.

[Andrew Santino]

I know I was kind of offended. He didn't want to hit me, but he would say stuff, he'd be like, oh, you're, you're. You're growing up fast. You know that kind of really filling.

[Grace O'Malley]

Up that bathing suit.

[Andrew Santino]

You guys have heard that foul your whole life. There's always like a creepy guy and you're like one of your parents friends that's like, oh, you're gonna be a big grown woman soon.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Nasty. Dude, that guy sucks.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so creepo. When you and my sister would tell me some of the stuff he would say, and I was like, damn, dude, I can't believe I never. I never heard it. Like, he would say some shit like, I like it better when your hair's up. Oh, fucking gross.

[Grace O'Malley]

Some weird shit. You want to see them shoulders? That's why you gotta wear sweaters.

[Andrew Santino]

And then she was like, I didn't even know what to say. I'd be like, oh, you should have. I mean, you should. On him. Just say some. You know, we know so many secrets about him.

[Grace O'Malley]

The more, the more I think about it. I think, actually, I think our dad. I think our dad was the creepy uncle.

[Andrew Santino]

Your dad said Creepy?

[Grace O'Malley]

He didn't say creepy, but he did creepy things. Like he would threaten my cousins with the blowtorch.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, that's standard, dad.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

If they're getting out of line, you gotta. You gotta let them know.

[Grace O'Malley]

They would chase them around.

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's standard, dad. That's cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean. I mean, they. They're like. They're kind of. They say they still talk about it in therapy. I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

They probably don't. Did your dad ever hit you guys?

[Grace O'Malley]

You know.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it's. You know. You know, the noise said everything.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. How about you?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he slept around a little bit, but I deserved. Every time I got hit. I know that sounds cliche.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

When I got smacked in the back of the head, it's cause I was a fuck up.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, you'll shit.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not cause I was doing the right thing or being a. I was being a smartass. I probably said some dumb shit. You deserve a crack. It was rude.

[Grace O'Malley]

My dad found me in a parked car at an apartment when he couldn't find me for a whole night.

[Andrew Santino]

What were you doing?

[Grace O'Malley]

I got kicked out of a concert. Found my way home in a limo with some freshmen and just kind of slept in my car.

[Andrew Santino]

You slept in your car?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Why don't you just go home?

[Grace O'Malley]

Because I. I knew enough. I couldn't drive.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, you were fucked up.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That's actually very smart.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So he was not mad. He was like, this is good. I'm glad you didn't drive.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, a little bit. He was like, you could have. You could have got arrested. He knows from past experience.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what I mean? How many times you've been arrested?

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, me. Not fake id, but. Doesn't really count.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, I got arrested.

[Grace O'Malley]

What'd you get arrested for?

[Andrew Santino]

I got arrested for public intoxication. Banger urinating in public.

[Grace O'Malley]

That sex pension.

[Andrew Santino]

Isn't that weird? No, it's not. You know what it was though? I had it reduced to disorderly conduct in public or whatever. But what's crazy is because I was peeing outside behind my buddy's bar and the cop was like. He said, go ahead and finish. And then we're going to jail or whatever. And I was like, oh, dude, I had to pee. The bathrooms were stuffed. It's outside. It's tucked behind a bar. I don't even know how he would. Why he was back there.

[Grace O'Malley]

He was waiting.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I was like. He was probably pissing too. But then they made me do alcohol classes, so. I didn't get like one of those. Like, you don't get like a sexual charge for that.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's good. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I'm peeing outside. I'm not exposing myself to somebody. It's like behind a bar in an alley. But they made me go to alcohol, whatever classes and dude the stories because I was in there with like, bonafide alcoholics. Like guys who had some wild shit go down.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And they'd be like, and what about you? You know, Share your story. I was like, I was just pissing behind a bar. I'm in college.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, I'm.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm supposed to be doing this.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is legit. Everyone hated the fact. They were like, why is this kid in here? I'm like, this is so I don't have to go to jail.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That was my community service. And I had to do classes and. And pay a fine for peeing outside. You never peed outside.

[Grace O'Malley]

I did it last night.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what I'm saying. I was.

[Grace O'Malley]

A little bit, but I did that. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Squatting truck.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was like. I was. Excuse me, guys, one second.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. You know, you have to go. You have to go.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm a lady.

[Andrew Santino]

You're a woman of the night.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, actually, you're in my. My favorite show of all time, dying up here. Seriously, My favorite show of all time. I love that show.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Grace O'Malley]

I was bullshit that they canceled it.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, that's very nice. Yeah. Well, American TV watchers didn't. Didn't like it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Really.

[Andrew Santino]

The critics fucked us up, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

Really?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. They didn't like us. You know, I think it was hard. It was a period piece, so that also fudgeing annoys people. I think people are like. With stuff like that. I don't think it's their flavor. I mean, some people liked it a lot.

[Grace O'Malley]

I loved it.

[Andrew Santino]

That's why I loved it.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was actually the last time me and my dad actually sat down and.

[Andrew Santino]

And watched it together.

[Grace O'Malley]

Watched it and like, had a good moment together.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you ever see the scene where it was with my dad.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And we pee on his dead dog's grave?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yep.

[Andrew Santino]

That is one of my. When we shot that scene, we shot it at like 4 or 5 in the morning and. And we were. We knew we were late and last up. So like, I said to Al Madrigal, I said, well, let's go get dinner late in. In Silver Lake, because my house was in Silver Lake in the show. And so we go out to, like. I think we're a fat cat or Something like that and black cat. And then afterwards, he's like, damn, dude, aren't we supposed to be, like, up for this? Like, we were supposed to be so up, like, blacked out and high. I was like, oh, yeah, that's right. We're, like, coming home and we're all fucked up. He's like, should we have a couple cocktails to, like, cruise into it?

[Grace O'Malley]

It's method acting.

[Andrew Santino]

And I was like, yeah, let's have a couple. By the way, we also had, like, three hours till we were up. So we have a cocktail, you have another one. We go to a bar. One more. He knows somebody there. We see someone. We go. We go to another bar. Now we're getting calls like, hey, you guys are coming to set? Like, you know, we're about to shoot, we're ready. The lights are up. We go. We get to that house, and I was fucking smoked. And. And the guy who played my dad knew. And he's an. He's an extremely talented, very serious actor. And I went up to him and I was like, dude, I'm not going to fuck up the scene. I promise. I'm just saying, you know, I'm fucked up, but I'm supposed to be fucked up in the scene. But I'm being honest with you. But we had some drinks, and he was like, use it, use it. And I was like, oh, he's the fucking man. He didn't complain. He didn't get upset. Because I thought, oh, he's.

[Grace O'Malley]

I thought that was going a different way.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, he's a real actor. He's like a theater actor. Like a legit I'm. And I was like, he's gonna hate me. He's gonna be, like, unprofessional. You. You fire this kid.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And he was so good. And then we did that scene, and he was so much better because he was, like, supposed to be mad that we were fucked up. And he was kind of upset that it was late and we had run around all night. It worked. That was. It was so fun. Man, that show was good. I appreciate you saying that. It was fun to do, but it was just, you know, it was tough, I think. Cause people criticized the fuck out of it and.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, so, like, a win for you ended up being, like something that, like, kind of sucks.

[Andrew Santino]

It just. It was just one of those moments where, like, I loved it, but I was shocked that, like, people didn't like it the way I thought it was going to be received. I didn't think it was going to be, like, the show of the century. But I did think it was gonna get more, like, more love. But instead we got. We got cooked. I think people just didn't. They just wanted to call. Also, I think doing stand up on tv because you're doing fake stand up.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. So that was one of my questions, like, so hard. Did you. Did someone write for you for those jokes or. And, like.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, because we're supposed to write in character. So we would. We would have, like, a set list of jokes that we would write, work on with the writers, and then we could come up with our own if we wanted. They told us, you know. Cause we would improv a fuckload when we were filming. But you're filming those set days when you're on stage, you're doing, you know, six hours.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So you're just kind of riffing a lot, and then a lot of times you're finding new shit and then you're doing jokes that are of the time. It has to be the 70s, you know, so we would write jokes for that and we'd get them approved to see if they were, like, the rhythm of this character.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But it was tough. It's tough for someone to be like, these jokes aren't funny. You're like, yeah, yeah. Fucking 1979.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. This isn't going to be material.

[Andrew Santino]

Is very different from now.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So I think, like, that also threw people that were like, stand up. Isn't the. Stand up isn't good? You're like, it's 40, 50 years old.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's not what you like. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And so you didn't care. Writing for it because it's not like you're going to take those jokes and you can't.

[Andrew Santino]

You couldn't. And also, like, some of the jokes, I will say, like, the. The irony was sometimes you would, like, write a joke with a writer and you could still use it today because that's how. That's how little we progress as a society.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, we were writing jokes about. There was a Roe v. Wade thing. You know what I mean? But it is so funny that you're like, oh, yeah. Half of that shit that we talked about is still, you know, like, we talked about how weed is illegal and comically enough, weed still illegal in a lot of states. It is so funny. It's like some of the things were interesting that a writer would write them and I'd be like, dude, this is so that we could. You could do the exact same today.

[Grace O'Malley]

That is wild.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we know. We're not. We We. I think we. We progress as society in very, very tiny little steps. We think we make huge leaps, but we really don't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Nothing. Nothing's all that different from that.

[Andrew Santino]

Same, same. Just new spin.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just. I. I was as a watcher that it got canceled because we left on a cliffhanger.

[Andrew Santino]

I love you guys.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was. I mean, it was.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, well, yeah, that's right. We did. Yeah. Same thing when they canceled Dave. When we are. Well, they didn't cancel Dave, but when we stopped doing Dave, people wanted to know what the next season was. We. We know, but no one knows.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, really? You can never share that, right?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, no, because if he ever wants to do it, he may do it again, or we won't. We wouldn't do it again. But if he wants to take it and, like, do a spin on whatever the.

[Grace O'Malley]

He wants it, and that's on him.

[Andrew Santino]

It's all on him. Yeah, it's all on Dave.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I was working on that.

[Andrew Santino]

Fun. You know, it was. It was cool. I mean, that show was a hit in the sense of, like, people liked it, the critics liked it, and the audience liked it. So that was fun. But.

[Grace O'Malley]

And it was like one of Hulu's first, like, good shows.

[Andrew Santino]

I'd say it was the largest viewed comedy in fx' history. Because of the Hulu deal.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, no. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, so that was kind of like a weird moment for us. Like, we were like, largest FX comedy. I was like, well, Hulu.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, it's because the Hulu numbers, like fx, you know, still always Sunny, is the largest numbered comedy they've ever had. Yeah, but I'm friends with Charlie Dayton. I like to talk about that. Then I'm like, you like your little FX show? Yeah, because we got the numbers, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

The upper hand there.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, he's doing 19 seasons. I think they won't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, they've been on. I. I just said the other day, it's always Sunny. The Simpsons and Grey's Anatomy.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like. Like Longest Running.

[Andrew Santino]

And it's got to be one of the other one of the soap operas. It's got to be like Days of Our Lives.

[Grace O'Malley]

Would you ever do a soap opera?

[Andrew Santino]

I do one episode for fun. I think that'd be. I do like a pop in.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

As long as it's really dramatic and, like, someone's super mad at me, you know, I just want one scene where the woman's like, get the out of here, Mark. I want that, you know, that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Play a piece of shit.

[Andrew Santino]

I know what you did, you piece of shit. You'll never see your kids again. I want that. That's what I want. Yeah, I want that shit. And I want it to be like a. You know.

[Grace O'Malley]

What would be your ideal role? Like, in a soap opera? Oh, no, in general.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, we're out with a show right now. I've done this my, like a third time making the rounds, trying to go out with this other show that I wanted to make. But I just want to go back to, like, old school buddy comedies, group theory comedies. Like. Like what Sonny did, you know, like what workaholics did. I want that again.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, I think we're missing Pride did. Yeah, I want that again. And I. And it's hard for networks or companies to do those because a lot of the successful shows in the comedy space are not traditional comedy. They're like. Like Seth's show, like the studio on Apple.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's not like a true comedy, but it's comedy.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's. It's tough to watch. Like, it's so. It's so good.

[Andrew Santino]

But it's anxiety induced.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's anxiety. Like.

[Andrew Santino]

And the jazz in the background doesn't help.

[Grace O'Malley]

Dude. Totally. Like, I was. I was just watching in the latest episode, and it's. It's all of them trying to figure out the cast for Kool Aid.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Kool Aid, man. Yeah. It's a great episode.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's a great episode. And it's like, exactly what's probably going on. It's like, well, we need them to all be black, right? And then. Then it goes up to Ice Cube.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, if she's Asian, how Asian is she? Yeah, that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it's fucking wild.

[Andrew Santino]

No, it's genius. But at that. But that's what I mean is like, I think old school comedy. Comedy is hard to find on TV now. I think it's a hard sell. I don't know. I don't know if people want it. I mean, we want to. I want to do them.

[Grace O'Malley]

I like shows that get canceled.

[Andrew Santino]

So I know everything I've ever liked gets canceled or it's under watched. Like, I thought Galvan actors. I thought Baskets is one of the best shows I've ever seen and no one really watched. I mean, comedy nerds watched it. But outside of that, if I told someone, like back home, that's the reference. It's. If you ever want to know if something's actually popular, I call back home.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Talk to someone from Boston or Chicago and go, do you guys and people you work with know about this?

[Grace O'Malley]

That's the most out of touch guy talking about to anybody who's just like one of his pals that he grew up with.

[Andrew Santino]

I always go, hey, do you guys know about this in your office?

[Grace O'Malley]

People watching this stuff?

[Andrew Santino]

No, because we get up from the business, you think you'll be living in LA or New York and you'll think everybody likes something, but go talk to someone in the real world. Then you're like, no one likes that.

[Grace O'Malley]

I live in a bubble in New.

[Andrew Santino]

York, but these cities are bubble we live in. You know, it's like, it's like girls. Every. The business love the show Girls and I'm not taking a shot at girls. But it was like 300,000 people watched it. HBO made it feel like it was a billion people. No one watched that show.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's had a resurgence.

[Andrew Santino]

We loved the show business. People in the industry love the show, but it was not a high viewed show for hbo.

[Grace O'Malley]

And now there's a podcast, pick it apart.

[Andrew Santino]

Every episode, which is of Girls.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yes.

[Andrew Santino]

That's so funny.

[Grace O'Malley]

Rewatching Girls.

[Andrew Santino]

I think that's what it's called, rewatching Girls.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

There's a great podcast I love and they break down. They're these two funny guys, they're comics and they do breakdowns of other people's shows. Like that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, no, the talking. Talk to her.

[Andrew Santino]

Talking. Talk to him.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Those guys are.

[Andrew Santino]

Buddy, those guys are so funny. I, I think that kid is like, he'll swirl wine.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you think she really meant by that?

[Grace O'Malley]

If I were those guys, I'd be so pumped. You just said that.

[Andrew Santino]

They're so brilliant. Shout out to those guys who they're so funny. I've seen clips and that makes me laugh so hard.

[Grace O'Malley]

It came full circle. They, they, they went on the show.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, they did.

[Grace O'Malley]

They did.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, wow.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That girl's not done. Didn't she get in trouble? Didn't she people over or something?

[Grace O'Malley]

Ye. Crypto. Crypto scam, you know, Classic.

[Andrew Santino]

I should have got in on that. Dude, I wish I didn't scam anybody. I'm still waiting for my time to scam. Well, yeah, I'm looking to scam. Dude, I'm out here. I want to scam.

[Grace O'Malley]

You might as well scam.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, get your scam on.

[Grace O'Malley]

You know, shows aren't getting picked up. You got to scam.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, dude, trust me. I know.

[Grace O'Malley]

I know nothing about that. I bet. That's brutal. I'm sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

The executives are like, get back out there and start scamming buddy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Start punking again.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll start punking again. I might as well.

[Grace O'Malley]

All these kids, they just stole your.

[Andrew Santino]

They did. They took a lot of our stuff. Well, everybody's begging and borrowing from someone else. But I like, we did so much wild on that show that never made the air.

[Grace O'Malley]

Look, I always thought it was crazy that anyone would sign off on that. Like after you just turn. Like after you were just like a. You're like, yeah, run it.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, you know what it was? The Saving grace was like the, the, the property. Right. Like the IP was saying, like punked. People know it was a brand to be associated with because they were like, oh, it makes me look cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

Because you got the.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, as long as I looked. As long as they looked cool, they were cool. We had some people not sign. Yeah, we had a couple people that didn't sign and they weren't cool and they know who they are. They like, even though the bits weren't crazy, they were mad about something. But like, yeah, we do. We made Drake. We, we put him at the Skirball Center. We told him he was going to meet with Biden when he was the vice president.

[Grace O'Malley]

What'd you tell him Biden wanted from him?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no. We had his team internally say that he's going to go meet with the vice president at the Skirball center for like a non profit event.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

And we drove him in all these armored cars and I played Secret Service and we went to the basement of the Skirball center and we put these weights on the bottom of his car kind of like, you know, like inside of a watch. There's. I can't remember the name because I'm stupid, but there's a. There's a. It's a lopsided weight and when it winds, the inertia will keep it spinning faster and faster. So it's a heavy weight that just whips around. So they build these things and we put them underneath a car so it feels like it's fucking shaking.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, shit.

[Andrew Santino]

He thought he was in an earthquake.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, no way.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. And he's from Canada, so you know.

[Grace O'Malley]

He'S never experienced that.

[Andrew Santino]

No. And he. Dude and it on camera. I can't believe he signed off on that to this day. Because he was like grabbing his boy. He was like, yo, yo. It was so funny, dude. It was so fucking mean to like watch this guy go. Doug is gonna be okay, dog. It was so good, man. And what works great was we put those on our car.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Even though we couldn't shake the building. We shook just our car, but we made it so he couldn't get out. We child locked all the doors. So he. All he sees is he feels a car shaking. And we have lights breaking on purpose and other cars with the motor shaking. So from your visual, you just think the whole world is shaking.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my God. And he's 25, sitting on 25 mil at the time.

[Andrew Santino]

That's exactly right, dude. He's how you feel, how you feel in that earthquake. Yeah. I told him I was a big fan and he was like in the bit and he was like, God damn, I gotta call my mom and tell the Secret Service likes my shit. We had fun on that show. And then we, we. We peeled out some bits that I think, like, yeah, they got reused by YouTube. But that, that's fucking.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's just kind of how it goes.

[Andrew Santino]

That's how it goes.

[Grace O'Malley]

What was your favorite, like, character you played on that? Because you usually played like a very, like, stern, down to earth guy.

[Andrew Santino]

Unpunked. I think the best character or the best, best bit we ever did was with Justin Bieber and Taylor Swift as we made her think.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that was.

[Andrew Santino]

We made her think she lit a wedding on fire with a firework.

[Grace O'Malley]

And the whole boat was on fire.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. And then we came to shore and I was like a disgruntled groom. And. And my wife kept saying to Taylor Swift's like, thank you, Taylor Swift. This is an omen. I shouldn't be marrying this guy.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's so good.

[Andrew Santino]

And I. And I was just like this guy who's just like, so out of his element, losing it, being like, like, thanks a lot, Taylor Swift. I'm not gonna marry the love of my life because of you. It was so stupid, dude. And she was heartbroken.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do you know how. How you probably would be fully canceled, no career, if it was now with the Swifties.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, dude. Yeah, that's kind of funny. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

That. To our girl.

[Andrew Santino]

It's kind of crazy how they protect her. Like, crazy. And then I met her now as a grown adult, which is very strange, and apologized profusely. I was like, I'm sorry. We did that when I was young and you were much young. I mean, her and Bieber were young at the time. I think they were like, God, I don't know.

[Grace O'Malley]

They were like the 13.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't. It's got to be because what. This was 2011.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, okay.

[Andrew Santino]

10. Maybe 2010. 10 or 11. I don't even know. She was probably 20 years old.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're not with kids. That's good.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but they're so, they were so young in their career, you know, like, they were still. Yeah. 19 is young. 20. She was young. But like also they were, they were young. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, completely. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It was just. There's something else that was young because they were so, like, they started so.

[Grace O'Malley]

Young that they started so. A little delayed.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you're super delayed. Yeah, yeah. Musicians and gymnasts, you know, I mean, you get. It's like they're delayed in a way where they're not childish, but their world is so protected.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

They're not allowed to just be a normal kid.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, there's like 30 people around them at all times being like, eat this, don't do that. You have to leave. Seeing people tell a young famous person, we have to go is the creepiest shit ever.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. That's weird.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, because they don't have any control, you know, then you, you. When you see that in Hollywood and it's not creepy. I don't mean in a gross way. I just. Handlers are like, we have to get you home.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's like, damn, dude, that sucks. They can't just like be. They're not allowed to be.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

They're on like a timetable and they have to like, we have to go to this interview and then you got to go see Ryan Seacrest and then you need to sign this thing. We're making your sneaker deal it. And there's no way. It's always a sneaker deal, dude. Reebok. Reebok called and. And there's no way that they can like live in the moment because it's so. When someone's like, when people criticize Bieber years ago and they were like, what a punk ass kid. Blah, blah, blah. It's like, dude, you give you 10 million when you're 16, you. You'd lose your mind.

[Grace O'Malley]

You'd be dead.

[Andrew Santino]

Yes. You'd be dead.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Dead. You do some dumb. It's you. I would have done so much worse than whatever that kid did.

[Grace O'Malley]

He pissed in a bucket.

[Andrew Santino]

Big deal.

[Grace O'Malley]

In a bucket.

[Andrew Santino]

I was broke and I did way worse shit.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know what I mean? Imagine If I had 10 million. I'd have. We did so. We did so much dumb when we were 15 and 16. But anyway, he would. They were, they were fun to work with, but it was wild to watch them kind of like, you know, explode into. Watch Bieber grow. It was wild to see.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's pretty nice.

[Andrew Santino]

In front of our face. I mean, he was already famous, but it just. We watch it all kind of continue as a trip.

[Grace O'Malley]

What, what age did you move out here?

[Andrew Santino]

I moved here when I was 22 years old. The moment I graduated college, I got into a car.

[Grace O'Malley]

You just.

[Andrew Santino]

I got the out. Yeah, you're just a Long beach with a dream.

[Grace O'Malley]

One car in a dream?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no dreams. A lot of nightmares, actually. Yeah, a lot of. It's not gonna work out. You're gonna have to move back home. No, I moved here from Arizona State. I went straight here because I knew if I went back to Chicago, I probably would never try anything.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's fair.

[Andrew Santino]

And so I moved here with some friends that were from California.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's huge.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

You weren't just like solo dollar.

[Andrew Santino]

It was like three guys that I. Well, one guy, my buddy Colin, who was from the Bay, he was going to move to San. To Southern California, because we knew a bunch of guys that lived in Long beach. And my goal was to get to la. And so we met a couple of dudes down there. I slept on a Lazy Boy for a little while and then we scrounged enough money, I got a day job to get my own apartment and then. Or my apartment with him. And then I didn't have a car, so he. He loved to gamble. Shout out Miller, he would say, drop me off at the office and you could take the car. So I drop him to the casino, drop him off. That was his office. And then I would drive to LA and do shows, do open mics, and a lot of times not get on. Just like bounce around town.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then drive back at like midnight, one in the morning, pick him up from the casino and then we go home and get up and then do it all over again every day.

[Grace O'Malley]

And if he wanted, it was. It was a great night.

[Andrew Santino]

He won a lot, man. He was really good. He was able to pay his rent. I was fine. Scared. I was struggling. Bouncing from shitty job and working at. I was an assistant at a physical therapy office.

[Grace O'Malley]

What do you do there?

[Andrew Santino]

I was. I started. I started hanging with this chick. This chick was very nice to me and we kind of were. We were seeing each other a little bit and she was like. I was like, I need money. I'm so broke. So if you hear of anything. And she's like. Well, at the PT office that. She was becoming a pt, she was going to school.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

She's like, they need someone to, like, clean up. And I was like, I'll clean, I'll do anything. Yeah, but Then when I got there, the guy who ran it, like, kind of had a crush on me. He, like, liked me. We always goofed around because I didn't take it serious. So he like, gave me way. He just gave me way more responsibility than like, I would. He would, like, make me check in on patients. He'd like, go see how that guy's movement is.

[Grace O'Malley]

I wasn't even in school for playing a doctor.

[Andrew Santino]

I would just go up to him and fake it. I'd be like, let me see your. And dude, can you have this range of motion? And I would give them little workouts that they would tell me to give them. Is probably definitely illegal.

[Grace O'Malley]

Bad stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

100% is 100% illegal. But no, that was. That was like my first job. Like, job job. And then made my way up to la. Finally I met a bunch of guys on a grad school website for UCLA of guys looking for off campus housing. So I lived with a bunch of grad students.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Or two graduates in one gr. And then it was three guys in. In one bathroom. Three dudes, one bathroom. Gross.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's a lot of pubes in the sink.

[Andrew Santino]

So many pubes.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like, it's out of control.

[Andrew Santino]

And then we had a pube sink. And we call it a pube sink sink.

[Grace O'Malley]

And everyone knows which ones are yours?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, no, but I eat them, so no one knows, you know, I mean, I clean up my mess.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, no, it's good.

[Andrew Santino]

Everybody knows. Three dudes in one bathroom. I did. Remember how agonizing. We all had day jobs, so we'd have to plan it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, like who gets to shower before work?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, because we all had day gigs, so it was like we had to get up at the exact same time. And it was like, who would get in then. Then it became a routine of knowing who was gonna go. But you couldn't poop in the morning before shower.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, you gotta fuck everyone's day up.

[Andrew Santino]

Suck, dude. Sometimes you wake up and you're like, fuck, dude. What am I gonna shit in a bag or ruin everyone's day? You can't. Yeah, but by the time I got to the office, it was far away. It's tough, right?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

We lived a good life.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's good stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

And then what happened? And you know the world.

[Grace O'Malley]

What was your first big gig doing?

[Andrew Santino]

I. Doing punks was like. Well, my first, like, did punk too, right? She did, yeah. Before me. That old. My first paid gig was I did a show. I. I did a show called Big on the Web. And then it was called the surf report. MSN.com had like a daily web update. Like, what's big on the web? What's the big numbers? So I hosted that for a year.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's like a nuanced podcast. That was like the first.

[Andrew Santino]

It was. Dude, it was kind of a trip. And that was. That's how I got to quit my job, my day job. Because that's when you see money. Yeah. Because that one year of money, I knew I could. It would last me enough where I could go get small gigs here and there and then be able to pay rent. But then after a year of being free, I did things. Think, dude, did I make a big mistake?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, I quit. I was like, I should probably get a job.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think. I think I quit a little too early.

[Andrew Santino]

I got lucky and then this other thing lined up and then Punked happened because I. My buddy Sean was dating a girl who worked in a manager's office, and they needed young writers for a Comedy Central pilot and they didn't want to pay. So every writer that went in the budget was so shit that they were like, I'm not doing that fucking gig. There's no money. And I was like, they'll always find someone. I'm it. I was like, pay me nothing. I'll do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

They'll fuck you no matter what, because someone will always take it.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll take it. Take the money. Well, back then, too, I needed anything, so I took it. And then I wrote a Comedy Central pilot with Ian Edwards. The great Ian Edwards.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Who I idolized, then got to work with. It was so weird. And the pilot was dog, but the studio liked it so much that that's how I got hired to do Punk'd that. They were like, will you write on the next season? Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, no way.

[Andrew Santino]

It was kind of a trip.

[Grace O'Malley]

I had been a fun writers room.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God, it was so much fun.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, how to fuck with people.

[Andrew Santino]

And then that's all it was. It was a bunch of, like, smart comedy. It was a bunch of improv and then stand ups and then traditional writers, and it was just lunatics. It was a nightmare. Every day was like, how much up can you come up with? And then someone across a line and then people get in an argument, and.

[Grace O'Malley]

Then you look at someone a little different.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Jesus Christ.

[Andrew Santino]

Like you're comfortable with that. And they're like, look, dude, I think I grew up on Different Cities, man. But that was my. That was my. That's my bio.

[Grace O'Malley]

Thank you Very much.

[Andrew Santino]

You got my story.

[Grace O'Malley]

Thank you. I appreciate that.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I've only told that to you. And you. That's it.

[Grace O'Malley]

And. And a thousand other people. I'm so sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

Just some. But I don't give it all to everyone. I really like you. That's why I gave it to you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Thank you very much. Thank you very much.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right.

[Grace O'Malley]

You've been. So you've done your podcast since 2018.

[Andrew Santino]

I started Whiskey Ginger. Oh, God. Maybe eight years ago. Maybe. I think it is. I think it might be eight. Seven or eight. Yeah. One of those two.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then you and Bobby started Bad Friends.

[Andrew Santino]

Pandemic.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that was pandemic.

[Andrew Santino]

Beginning of the pandy. We started it when the pand. It was an accident. We started it when he got out of rehab. When his dad died within three months of us recording the pandemic hit.

[Grace O'Malley]

How do you do both and not run out of shit to say?

[Andrew Santino]

I do. I do it just. Well, no, that's. It's just like. But my show is me interviewing one person, and it's me one on one. Ing and having a chum fest like this.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And him and I. It's playtime. It's different. It's like a different. There's a different portion of my brain. My niece said one time, I love this. She ate dinner and then she didn't finish. And her mom was like, well, you don't get dessert. And she was like, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's a different part of the stomach. Dessert is a different part of the stomach. I'm full from regular food. But there is a different. There's a dessert part. And I was like, that's so fucking clever. Give that kid the dessert. You know, but that's how I feel with comedy. With, like, Bobby and I is a different part of my brain. Literally. It's a different function of my brain when I do, like, podcasts and other shit. Like, it fun, playful. But with Bob, it's like. I don't know, it's like two little bad boys meeting up in the woods.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Poking something with a stick.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

See if it.

[Andrew Santino]

See if it's still breathing. You want to taste it? Yeah, it's that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It's just two little dumb kids. He makes me feel like a kid. I don't think I'll ever get tired of doing that show.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was just gonna ask. Does it ever get.

[Andrew Santino]

We'll do that. We'll. We'll quit that show when. Tell people stop watching it. Yeah, but. But I mean, we'll do it until the wheels fall off. I don't give a. I'll do it even if people aren't watching it. But until it needs to die. Yeah, we'll keep doing it because we have so much. It's the most fun. We're gonna do it Tuesday night, and I'm excited because we've got some bits planned and he doesn't know about it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah, it's my favorite.

[Andrew Santino]

Dude. He gets so mad when he doesn't know.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just. I just met both of you for.

[Andrew Santino]

The first time the other day in the lot. He was in the lot too.

[Grace O'Malley]

In the law. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

He just got a brand new car. He's the only guy I know he'll get a brand new car and he'll hit something within a week.

[Grace O'Malley]

Is that what happened?

[Andrew Santino]

Just got it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Nice. Ye. Just got it like. Like one of. Like a real spiffy car.

[Andrew Santino]

He. No, he get. He. He. It's not. He doesn't ever do, like, fancy. He has, like, a Hyundai something. I have a Ferrari and a Lamborghini.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay, good for you.

[Andrew Santino]

And I have a. I have a Bentley and I have a Rolls Royce. I have four Rolls Royces and I'm being punked. You're being punked.

[Grace O'Malley]

Bring out Ashton Kutcher.

[Andrew Santino]

Your sister just rips her face off. She's. She's Ashton.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, wait, so who's. Who's been your favorite guest on your part? God. They're both yours. But on Whiskey Ginger.

[Andrew Santino]

No. Yeah. Because we don't have a lot of guests on Bad. We don't do bad. We don't love having guests on because it throws our rhythm off, you know? Like, I think on Whiskey. When I did it in Australia with John Cena, it was probably one of the most fun I've ever had.

[Grace O'Malley]

It sounds like a mad lib.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

You know, when I did my John.

[Andrew Santino]

Cena down under, it was. He's just the man. John's like an insightful, thoughtful, funny person. He's just like a. He's everything I would want. You'd want him to be. He's like, as cool as he is nice, as talented as he is, hard working, smart. He's very smart. Dude. He's really.

[Grace O'Malley]

That blows my mind.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he's very. I mean, like, I think, like, people may think of him in a type of way because he's big. Big, big, big, you know, big break.

[Grace O'Malley]

I thought he'd be like Gronk.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, dude, he's smart. No, he knows multiple languages. He would Play piano in the middle of the day.

[Grace O'Malley]

What?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. He's better than you and I. Yeah. Yeah, he's the fucking man. He was probably one of the best I've had on the show. I was trying to think of what's more fun is who is the worst I've ever had on the show.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I'm trying to stay away from who tanked being clickbaity, but. Yeah, that'd be great.

[Andrew Santino]

No. Yeah, well, I'm trying to think of who tanked the and who didn't do great or who wanted to give it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Not air an episode.

[Andrew Santino]

Absolutely.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. That's pretty.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that could be pretty. There's been a few that I had to not air. Yeah. I'll tell you one that was funny. Hannah Burner thought I didn't want her to air. She was like. I was like, the card up. And she's like, yeah, I'm sure it did.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, well, that is a classic line.

[Andrew Santino]

And she held it against me for a while, and then she ended up coming back and doing it again anyway. But I was like, no, I'm serious. The card up also, because I was running it by myself. I did that. I did that whole show by myself.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, really?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Damn.

[Andrew Santino]

I still. I mean, I have McCone, who's on bad Friends, help me, but I taught myself all this when I started eight years ago because no, it. Relatively no one was doing it.

[Grace O'Malley]

That was the gold mine. That was like the time to get in.

[Andrew Santino]

So I just started doing it and taught myself everything. I learned how to do the. Every camera and I learned how to edit. And then I found editors to help sometimes.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's. That's. I. That's what I did to try to get into my. My last job. I just told them I knew how to do everything. And I bought Adobe for Dummies.

[Andrew Santino]

Adobe for Dummies.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I. I learned it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. I learned highlighting pages.

[Andrew Santino]

That's. But you have to do it. You have to, like, learn all that on your own. Otherwise, I. I just feel like you. You have to be resourceful because if you're left alone and people quit or someone. Someone. You have to figure it the out.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And so we did it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, good to know. Like, if. If you don't know how someone else does their job, but you're working together, you have like. I feel like you're a little bit of an. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You get more respect when you learn how shitty things are, how hard things are to do.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like some people are like, well, why can't you get that out sooner, Like. Well, no, because it takes time, you know, like, just don't be a piece of.

[Andrew Santino]

Don't be a piece of.

[Grace O'Malley]

Don't be a piece of. It's as easy as that.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm trying to think of who's the worst guest I had on my show. I don't really know. There's people that. That I feel like they didn't have a good time. Like, that's a. You ever had someone on. On here where you're like, my last plot?

[Grace O'Malley]

I did. I. I was hungover and I thought it was gonna be really funny. We both did. To have Jordan Belfort on, like, the actual Wall Street.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And he just was trying to sell his book and he wasn't telling it. Yeah. It's the second one, by the way.

[Andrew Santino]

Who wrote it, though?

[Grace O'Malley]

I know. I mean, that guy's out of his fucking mind. He's saying he doesn't do blow anymore. He's totally blowed up.

[Andrew Santino]

Sure.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, I was like. Like he. He was running circles around me, and then I. I just asked. I'm like, can you go to the bank and ask for a stock? He goes, are you stupid?

[Andrew Santino]

Like, oh, okay, sweetheart. He was a nice guy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. No, it was. It was brutal.

[Andrew Santino]

Dick, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. And I was like, you know what?

[Andrew Santino]

I didn't even.

[Grace O'Malley]

I wanted you to tell funny stories.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, he.

[Grace O'Malley]

He was like, sell. Doing. Sell me this pen all over again.

[Andrew Santino]

Sell me this pen, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was like.

[Andrew Santino]

He's like, I would have liked that. Yeah, that would have been fun.

[Grace O'Malley]

That be. Would have been fun.

[Andrew Santino]

I heard that was him. I think Makan made that whole thing up. Right? That was.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, he. Did he improv. That. That was a green light for him.

[Andrew Santino]

Is that the name of. That's the name of his book. Green Lights. That's all I see, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

A green light.

[Andrew Santino]

When you look at it, you see red lights, it's cuz you're looking the wrong way. It's like, don't people tell people that they'll get into a car accident?

[Grace O'Malley]

I just did Adam's Dr. Phil.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, where'd you guys do it?

[Grace O'Malley]

We did it in Texas, in Austin.

[Andrew Santino]

Nice.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I found out right as I was about to go on that McConaughey was in the audio.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, really?

[Grace O'Malley]

And I think I joked.

[Andrew Santino]

I was like, man, no, I bet you did great.

[Grace O'Malley]

I never had someone in the audience like that.

[Andrew Santino]

I was like, jesus, Someone big like that.

[Grace O'Malley]

I've never.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I do. I get that it can get in your head that you're like, oh, you want to do good in front of him? But then the less you think about it, the harder you crush.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that was true.

[Andrew Santino]

If you just get it out of. If you're like, if it's just like a. Who cares that they're here? If you don't let that little piece inside of you because the little kid inside you, when someone you like is in there, you're like, I want to do something.

[Grace O'Malley]

They're like, we're not even going to tell Adam. I'm like, well, I'm gonna blurt it on stage because I. I like. I get word vomit like that. I'm like, have you ever performed in front of someone like that?

[Andrew Santino]

Not at that. Not. McConaughey. McConaughey. Well, I got. Mine's like, mine. I didn't know. Which was kind of cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's good.

[Andrew Santino]

There's been a bunch of, like, cool ones, but the one I think was.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, so you ever got, like, nervous for it?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Christopher Guest. If you. If you don't know who that. You know who that is. I don't want to.

[Grace O'Malley]

I to. Don't want to. You.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I don't. Okay, great. He. He did a series of movies. He did Waiting for Guman. He did A Mighty Wind. He did Spinal Tap. Jersey. Spinal Tap.

[Grace O'Malley]

This sounds like this is before your time.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. I know it's probably before your time.

[Grace O'Malley]

Sorry.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, he was. He's like, the king of, like, improv casted films. Eugene Levy, Catherine o' Hara, Parker Posey.

[Grace O'Malley]

I've got these names. These names.

[Andrew Santino]

Fred Willard. Yeah. All these guys are, like, a part of it. That's, like, a part of his world of, like, pure, amazing improv films. Best in show. One of the best. It's like. It's about a dog show.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I know.

[Andrew Santino]

That's him.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Christopher Guest casted this show called Family Tree or some, and he's brilliant. And he then he, like, made me audition, but it was all improv. And then he sent. Or. I don't know how it happened, but Catherine o' Hara. You know who that is, right? Yep. He sent her to come see me at the Improv, but didn't tell me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

Or then I heard rumors that people were coming, and I was like, oh. And then I went up, had a really good set, and I went to the sound guy, and he was like, oh, dude. Fucking Catherine o' Hara sat in the comics booth and just watching was like, dying laughing. And I was like, what the fuck? Where'd she Go. And he goes, the moment she was outside, the moment you got called on, she came in the room and watched. And the moment you were done, she picked up her purse and thanked us and then walked out. I was like, that's so sick. Sick.

[Grace O'Malley]

That is so.

[Andrew Santino]

So she came just to watch me.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was kind of so cool.

[Andrew Santino]

I know. It kind of made me feel. Made me feel special. And then nervous. Then on the drive home, I was like, what did I say? Did I say anything that was annoying?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Is she gonna think I'm a loser? But I had a good set, so it. It felt good. But I never. I'm trying to think of if there was somebody famous that I got nervous in front of.

[Grace O'Malley]

When you telling that story, I thought she. I thought she picked up her stuff and left because she was, like, offended or something.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no. He's like, she waited just to see you. She didn't want. She didn't want to watch the show. So he must have told her, go watch. Yeah, yeah, and go see if you like him or something. That might have been a part of his process to be like, see if he sucks.

[Grace O'Malley]

But she seems. She seems satisfied.

[Andrew Santino]

She was. I guess she liked it, the song. I was like, dude, she was cracking up. It was wild. And he's like. I was staring at her the whole time. I was like, well, that's weird.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. You shouldn't have been doing that.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, that's probably why she left.

[Grace O'Malley]

They can be. They can be kind of strange.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a lot of them.

[Grace O'Malley]

The guys that laugh you up, they're. They're a little different.

[Andrew Santino]

They say some things, but also, you got to be friends with them because they've got.

[Grace O'Malley]

They can hear you.

[Andrew Santino]

I know they can hear you. Scratch your chest.

[Grace O'Malley]

Chest.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I always befriend the sound guy. I'm always like, you're. You're. You're not up when we're not up, right? Meaning, like, if cameras aren't up, sound is off. And they're always like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm always like, no, they love it. Let me see. Yeah, prove it to me, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, I don't. I don't trust you for a second.

[Andrew Santino]

I just said the nword nine times back there. Do you have that?

[Grace O'Malley]

Did you catch that? Yeah, I was with you.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we're just joking, dude. I knew you could hear me. That's why.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's why I said it.

[Andrew Santino]

Hey, I befriend the sound guys, dude. They're like the first people that you're like, they're listening. And if they don't, like you do. They wouldn't. But how easily if they were like, so easy. I'll just hand this card off to somebody.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, I put a lot of trust into people. I know I'll be talking a lot of like, yeah, this is off camera, though, right?

[Andrew Santino]

They're like, yeah, we're not going to use this. I hate when the people say, we won't use this. You're like, oh, no.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, but I think it's gonna end up somewhere.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, it's gonna end up somewhere sad, scary.

[Grace O'Malley]

I got a little game here. I asked Chat GBT because, you know, that's how all podcasts are made now to curate a list of redheaded stereotypes. And I want. I want you to give a rapid fire, one worded response to each. Fiery temper. Me, mischievous or bratty. You, soulless. Us, witches or cursed.

[Andrew Santino]

Witches or cursed.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's what. That's what Chad's saying. Whitney, evil or untrustworthy?

[Andrew Santino]

ChatGPT's got Elon Musk. That's two words.

[Grace O'Malley]

I can't believe this is number six for redheads, but we've got pale and freckles.

[Andrew Santino]

Me. I mean, these are all me ages poorly. That's really sad.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't think that's even true.

[Andrew Santino]

No, we do age pretty, but redheads have a tough. Our skin is. Well, I mean, not you. You're not us, dude. You're only a half breed. All right, well, you don't look like.

[Grace O'Malley]

I mean, full inbred. I've done 23andMe.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, seriously? Mama's dad and dad is their sister.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's just like more like they're from the same counties.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. It's kind of gross.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. But you guys don't look like you're in bread. You're good. You're both fine.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, we're gonna be all right, I think.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, you will.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know right away, dude, when you see an inbred, you're like, damn, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

You can tell it's good stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

You can tell right away, looking at you. Yeah, they rub their teeth, their tongue like they want to eat you. You ever seen that? The world. The wonderful whites of West Virginia lookers.

[Grace O'Malley]

Or whatever they're called.

[Andrew Santino]

The wild and wonderful whites of West Virginia. I think that's the name of this. Right?

[Grace O'Malley]

So that came out. And then my sister, we watched that, and then we shipped her off to West Virginia University.

[Andrew Santino]

God bless.

[Grace O'Malley]

I said, good luck.

[Andrew Santino]

Good luck. Get out there with the Jesco Jesco White and all them people I love.

[Grace O'Malley]

Used to say that's the one place we could do a. A personal terrorism, a terrorist attack. I think we could drop a bomb.

[Andrew Santino]

There in West Virginia.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then Whitney said, it's like years worth of poverty and it's not their fault. It's tough.

[Andrew Santino]

She's right. Oh, look at that. Yeah, she got.

[Grace O'Malley]

Say that anymore. Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

She got a big heart.

[Grace O'Malley]

Burns instantly in the sun.

[Andrew Santino]

God. Do you put on SPF every. Every day?

[Grace O'Malley]

Every day. I wear tinted tinted sunscreen as makeup.

[Andrew Santino]

That's what's cool. Yeah, because when I put on zinc on my nose and people are like, we're in fucking makeup. It's like, well, I'm trying to not die.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

But, yeah, I guess I'm wearing fucking makeup.

[Grace O'Malley]

I just had. I just had a really bad burn. There were people were like so pissed off in the comments. I'm like, why are you mad? I'm the one here. I don't know what the problem is.

[Andrew Santino]

I got burnt on my birthday vacation. My wife and I went on like a vacation for my birthday and the first fucking day I got burned like a moron.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

A fucking idiot.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're not cooler than the sun.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but you know what's so funny is like, I put on sunscreen. We were outside, then we drank champagne to like celebrate and I was. I got fucked up. And then I'm just. Cause we were drinking.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's the first night you fucked up. You ruin the second night and you get sunburned. It's all in the same.

[Andrew Santino]

And then having sex hurts so much with sunburn. When you're hooking up and you're like, oh, ooh, my leg. Ooh, ooh. Yeah. It was so annoying. And like, even rubbing against the sheets, like, hurt. I was like, the sheets are uncomfortable. I turn into Mort from fucking Family Guy. The sheets are uncomfortable.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think a blowjob would be fine.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Just tug me and then. Oh, the last one. I like this undesirable.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't think. You know, I'm not going to take on the heat of undesirable. But. But redheads are. I will say this many redheads are unfortunate looking. Yeah, yeah. Many. I would say. I would say. I would say the high majority of redheaded men and women are not the best lookers.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's unfortunate.

[Andrew Santino]

It's just a fact of genetics. We just don't. We don't have any fucking melanin. So our skin looks see through and weird. We look transparent.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It just looks strange. No. No one wants to see the blue in your actual veins.

[Grace O'Malley]

No. Especially on boobs. It's brutal. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

On your tits. Yeah. But your nipples are what color?

[Grace O'Malley]

Can't see them.

[Andrew Santino]

They don't. It's like rice paper.

[Grace O'Malley]

You can see the. The blood cells moving around.

[Andrew Santino]

You see your blood flow.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like rice paper. Correct.

[Andrew Santino]

It's kind of nice, though. No, See, there's something cool about that. Yeah. You know, someone has a flavor for everybody.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure of it. I do it to myself. Okay. Oh, you were on. You were on Adam's YouTube sketches.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And you played Duncan Rocks, where you kind of resemble an autistic guy who'd be prone. You'd be prone for a run in with Chris Hansen, I think.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. He lived in his stepdad's basement. That was a character I made up in response to vlogging. That was when, like, vlogging was hot and I thought it was fascinating that people would sit in their room and just talk to cameras. And we do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Look where we are now. Yeah. It's insane.

[Andrew Santino]

But it was like, that was a long time ago. And I started doing that character because I thought it was cool that someone would just talk to a camera in the privacy. Their own little. It was like their own little private Idaho.

[Grace O'Malley]

So it's like a diary.

[Andrew Santino]

It is.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was close. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It was kind of an interesting time in YouTube where you were like, oh, yeah. These people are just kind of like vomiting out their reality.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And now it's literally what everybody does.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Back then it was groundbreaking, though. People were doing it and it was fascinating.

[Grace O'Malley]

It wild.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do you. Do you enjoy doing sketch comedy?

[Andrew Santino]

I like it. I'm not. I'm not. I would never even call myself a sketch comic or whatever because I think real sketch comics would be like, no, I'm a stand up, but I don't.

[Grace O'Malley]

Did a skit the other day. They lost their mind.

[Andrew Santino]

Skits key. I can't do that.

[Grace O'Malley]

You can't. It's.

[Andrew Santino]

I like it. When I get off stage, someone's like, I love your skit. Like, well, that hurts.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's tough.

[Andrew Santino]

No, but I. I'm a true stand up, but I like dabbling in those worlds. I would kill to do more. I would love to do more sketch, but it's not my lane. So I kind of like, I watch. I. I watch a lot of it online.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, you know who I really like is. I don't know her last name. Veronica is cool.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, she rocks.

[Andrew Santino]

She's so funny, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

Her.

[Andrew Santino]

The other day, and she's so talented. I think she and her. And her. And. And her boyfriend. Who. I don't know if it's her boyfriend, but.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I don't. I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I think so.

[Grace O'Malley]

She's doing tires.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, is she?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Good for her.

[Grace O'Malley]

She. I auditioned for the role. She got.

[Andrew Santino]

Really? Then her.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, I'm pumped for it. I. I'm. That's my thing.

[Andrew Santino]

I. You and her, very different people.

[Grace O'Malley]

It was. Between.

[Andrew Santino]

You guys were the same role. What was the character.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then she auditions. And also Sarah from Sherman. Sherman.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

SNL audition.

[Andrew Santino]

Love her.

[Grace O'Malley]

I couldn't think of three more different people.

[Andrew Santino]

That's. That's actually a good thing.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

That does mean they're trying to find out. They want you to, like, embody the character and they'll. They want it to just be like a aha moment.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. And I didn't have the ha.

[Andrew Santino]

But it's better than when you go up against somebody and they're a lot like you, and so then, you know, it's down to, like, who put in more work or, you know, in terms of like. Or who kissed the right ass.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Talent is similar, but if you look nothing alike, you're like, this is great. They're just trying to figure out what's gonna work.

[Grace O'Malley]

Totally.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, when I beat a few people out with roles in it, I beat one guy twice.

[Grace O'Malley]

How do you know? Just from shooting the. Or.

[Andrew Santino]

No, you'll see each other in the audition, in the test room. You know, I beat a guy. This isn't even funny, but I beat him once. And then for the next thing I knew, they were giving it to me. They told me to my face, like, we'll give it to you. This is just. We have to go. This is like, oh, okay. And I went out in the. In the hallway, and he was there too. And the look on his face was like, not again.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're. You're like the evil guy in his story, dude.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Do you know him personally?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no. He's. But he's a talented actor. He's a New York actor. But I mean, like, we don't know each other, but. Yeah, but I know I beat him twice.

[Grace O'Malley]

Like, you. He. You coming around.

[Andrew Santino]

He's like, I'm sure he hates me, dude. I'm sure he's like, that guy can kiss my ass. I beat him twice. But it is weird when you see people. No, but we've all been Beaten. I've been beaten a thousand times.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm new to all this. I don't. I don't know what.

[Andrew Santino]

When you see your competition, it's in. It's weird. We used to have to wait in rooms and just sit there and stare at your sho shoes and not say anything because you're like, if the tension's weird. But now no one auditions in, I mean not rooms. Now people are putting in tapes and zooms.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's what it seems like it is.

[Andrew Santino]

This used to be the. Right down the street. Used to be one of the biggest auditioning a casting director used to be right there. It was like one of the. If you got in there, it was like, that's the one.

[Grace O'Malley]

You got it.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, well, because she did. She put me on the Office Arrested Development curb. Like she casted everything. Oh no, it's not like a secret. Alison Jones, Allison Jones is her name. She was. She used to be right there.

[Grace O'Malley]

There.

[Andrew Santino]

And I remember like driving past that thinking like, man, I would love to get in that room. And then when I got my first audition, I was so nervous.

[Grace O'Malley]

So once you're in, you're in kind of thing.

[Andrew Santino]

If you do a good read, then they'll bring you back for other reads.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

If you're good, they'll be like, yeah, that was good. Yeah, you're not going to get this role, but we'll see you for something else.

[Grace O'Malley]

And that's not, that's not the same anymore.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, for me it's not because I. There's not a lot. I don't get put up for a lot of stuff now. It's almost like, like pretty specific if they want me or not.

[Grace O'Malley]

For Dave, did they ask you to do that or did you audition?

[Andrew Santino]

The.

[Grace O'Malley]

That just seemed like it was.

[Andrew Santino]

The casting director brought me in and him and I had met like once before, but the casting director brought me in to. She was like, you gotta, you gotta do this for me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like you gotta come in and. And do this play with. With him because it'll be, it'll work. And the moment I started reading it with him, I was like, oh yeah, this is fucking. It was kind of a no brainer.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Yeah, that's good.

[Andrew Santino]

We knew, we. We bounced off each other very well. And that was. Yeah, that was because that cast director was fantastic too. She was. She had keen eye for stuff anyway. But no, I don't go in anymore. Now it's like they want you just do a tape from your fucking kitchen.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And it's the weirdest shit. They're like, don't come in. Just tape.

[Grace O'Malley]

You have your. Your wife run lines with you.

[Andrew Santino]

She. She would leave me before she would do that. Like, if I even asked her, if I was like, would you do these lines? She'd be like, you can get four. You can go outside and go yourself. No, I have to just either get a buddy to do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's a thankless job.

[Andrew Santino]

It's a thankless job.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like, it's. You get nothing out of it. It's like, my sister's been doing it with me. It's pretty brutal.

[Andrew Santino]

It sucks, right? It's so annoying. Especially if she gives you notes. She's like, can you read it like this? And you're like, you know what, dude? I don't want to do this anyway.

[Grace O'Malley]

She. She can memorize the lines better than I can.

[Andrew Santino]

You should audition. Watch. She starts getting. Yeah, dude, be so funny if she's landing more roles than you are.

[Grace O'Malley]

She's. She's. I'm that guy, and she's. You. She's just gonna start getting all the roles.

[Andrew Santino]

You're just gonna get all the roles. She's like, dude, I'm in this new Scorsese movie. I guess. I don't know. Whatever.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't know. I follow. I follow. His daughter on TikTok. She hooked it up.

[Andrew Santino]

She hooked it up.

[Grace O'Malley]

Dude.

[Andrew Santino]

We're homies, me and Marty.

[Grace O'Malley]

So you've got a new show.

[Andrew Santino]

New show.

[Grace O'Malley]

No Bad Lies.

[Andrew Santino]

No Bad Lies. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Where you interview professional golfers, athletes, entertainers, and influencers. In this segment, I'm gonna quiz you, and I'm gonna ask you if you know these golf terms.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, okay. That's easy.

[Grace O'Malley]

And what you doing? All right. Fade.

[Andrew Santino]

A fade is when you hit a ball. Well, it depends on if you're a righty or lefty, but if I'm. I'm a righty, a fade goes off up to the right. That's like a push or a fade. You don't even know that. Even say that on there?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, it's like a hook.

[Andrew Santino]

A hook, if I'm a righty, means it goes left. It. It. It turns left.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's exactly what it says. Uppercut.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a boxing term.

[Grace O'Malley]

Very good. Lie.

[Andrew Santino]

Lie. Lie means where the ball ends up. Like what. What position the ball is in. So that's where the show's no bad lies. Because we. I give them terrible lies to hit out of, like in mud or behind a rock or.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's a Good concept. I like that.

[Andrew Santino]

And then all the meanwhile they tell me a time where life gave them a bad lie. Meaning like when were they dealt kind of a shitty hand? And oh, how they get out of it.

[Grace O'Malley]

A little poetic.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm crossing philosophy in life. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

Damn, I thought I was gonna stump you. It's literally your whole concept. Scrum, scrummy.

[Andrew Santino]

Scrummy is what a pirate says when they go down on somebody in the.

[Grace O'Malley]

Name of our imaginary cat. Scramble.

[Andrew Santino]

A scramble is when you're playing with a group of guys. A scramble is you hit. You hit the best ball every single time.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's like word for word, like you studied handicap.

[Andrew Santino]

It's what your sister says about you when people say, what's her deal? They say handicap. A handicap is your. That is your stroke index of your average of average scores. Right? So they take all your average of scores and then your handicap is how many over par you shoot or under par.

[Grace O'Malley]

You're right for both. She used to, she went to school for. To help special needs kids.

[Andrew Santino]

Did you really? I'm gonna, I'm gonna announce it now. I don't have a date yet, but in this fall I'm doing a big thing for Special Olympics. I'm doing like a home run derby. Celebrity Home run derby in the Valley. So come support it. I'll post about it more, but I'm working with Special Olympics Olympics to do like a, you know, it was going to be in the summer, it was going to be a summertime smash, but it's going to be in the fall. You have, if you're out here, you should come.

[Grace O'Malley]

I would love to.

[Andrew Santino]

And it's. You're going to be able to hit home runs off of like celebrities and you give cash and there's prizes and there's going to be guest games and. And it's all going to Special Olympics.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh no.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I think.

[Grace O'Malley]

Is that like, why is that a special Special.

[Andrew Santino]

Why is it special?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, why? Why Special Olympics?

[Andrew Santino]

Why did I do special?

[Grace O'Malley]

Why Special Olympics for you? You.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my buddy, a buddy of mine works for Special Olympics putting on their new, like their new marketing and promotional team. And he was like, we want to think of something different. And he goes, what if we did? Cuz him and I met playing in a softball league together. He said, what if we did like a home run derby?

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's fun.

[Andrew Santino]

And I was like, yeah, dude, that's so smart. I was like, I'll get. I'll make celebrity friends of mine. Be like, you have to come do this.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hell, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And pitch to people and let local people in LA come hit off of you. And I'm going to try to get some athletes and stuff to come out. And I don't know. I've always. We've Maone who's on our show. His parents both work for Special Olympics.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

And so. And when Bobby and I did Family Feud, our. Our prize money was going to Special Olympics. I don't know. I just like it. I think it's rad.

[Grace O'Malley]

I thought you guys were great on that, by the way.

[Andrew Santino]

We had so much fun. We got Flavor Flav. They cheated.

[Grace O'Malley]

Dude, you say Flavor Flav's name three times, he just shows up. Have you ever noticed that?

[Andrew Santino]

Flavor. Flavor Flav, Flavor Flip Life. He comes down. What time is it?

[Grace O'Malley]

I interviewed him on. On my other podcast, and I was just like, what?

[Andrew Santino]

He's the best.

[Grace O'Malley]

He rocks.

[Andrew Santino]

He's unbelievable. He's 146 years old.

[Grace O'Malley]

He brought his 13 sons.

[Andrew Santino]

They brought him all the Family Feud. Two of them met for the first time behind backstage.

[Grace O'Malley]

You got to be me.

[Andrew Santino]

I swear to God.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's so wild.

[Andrew Santino]

He's like, my kids don't even know each other. They never met. And I was like, you guys are siblings and you don't know each other. He's like, yeah. With their half the Family Feud. Yeah. It was insane, dude. They had met for the first time in the trailer backstage.

[Grace O'Malley]

Holy.

[Andrew Santino]

And I'm eating breakfast burritos. I'm like, this is gonna be wild for you guys. So stupid.

[Grace O'Malley]

Really famous people together.

[Andrew Santino]

Flav is the man.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. He seems like he rocks.

[Andrew Santino]

He was so cool. When I. My first day job, I was working in the music industry doing, like, passports and visas and stuff for bands. And we had done Public Enemy, and Flav showed up to the office to sign his visa, you know, his, like, entry for Japan. And then he was like, yo, Drew, how do I get down to the car park? And I was like, it's just right down the elevator that you came up. It's one elevator. And he's like, show me. So I took him. I hand walked him. I, like, held. I was like, come on this way.

[Grace O'Malley]

You were walking your grandmother down the aisle.

[Andrew Santino]

I did. I did. My little bride. And I took him down to the car park and then the valet. It was an IHOP next to our building. The valet was working the IHOP. And he came running over and he's like, Mr. Flave, your car. Your car is ready. And Flavor had, at the time, a stretch Escalade. They're already big. And he's a small guy. And I even said to him, do you want help getting in there? He's like, ah, you crazy. And then give him a little boost. This is very Flavor Flav. He takes a. He takes a lot of money. I mean, it was like this dude. It was a knot out of his pocket. And the valet's standing there in the valet's, like, he's like, to have a good day. And he's like, no, no, come here. Come here, man. Come here. And the valet's like, oh, okay. And he's just standing there kind of uncomfortably, and I'm standing there, waiting to say goodbye by. And he's thumbing through money. And I mean, like, it's like, thousands of dollars. And then he gets to, like, inside a chunk of hundreds, and there's, like, a $1 bill, and he takes it out, and he hands it to the valet. And the valet goes, thank you. Thank you very much. He goes, I'm just playing. And then he breaks him off a couple hundred bucks. Yeah, dude. He was just with me.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, he's the man.

[Andrew Santino]

And I looked at him. I was like, that's very funny. If you. I will also. I would also so need money.

[Grace O'Malley]

You wouldn't have been here without.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, did I get the money, man?

[Grace O'Malley]

Show me the money.

[Andrew Santino]

I needed it bad. He was the best.

[Grace O'Malley]

My mom worked at a bar in Belf. Devo. You know that guy?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, Bell B. Devo.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah. He doesn't tip.

[Andrew Santino]

Really?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, really. Screwed my mother a bunch of times.

[Andrew Santino]

You. Dude, there's three guys in Belliv. Devo. But which one was it, Bell or Biv or Devo?

[Grace O'Malley]

Mr. Bivins.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, yeah, Mr. Bivins.

[Grace O'Malley]

Sorry, I thought that was his name.

[Andrew Santino]

Did not.

[Grace O'Malley]

Did not tip. Fucking local guy.

[Andrew Santino]

I take pride. I tip pretty well. But I will say, a girl called me out one time in Seattle, and it made me so fucking mad. Her friend called me out on Twitter or Instagram and was like, apparently, Andrew Santino thinks you don't need to tip at a coffee shop. And I was like, first of all, I tipped the dollar on the coffee. Then I came back and I bought a water, and I didn't tip on the water.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, my gosh.

[Andrew Santino]

I just bought the water. Water.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And then she called me out and was like, oh, celebrities don't tip as well as everybody says, like, what do you want from me, dude?

[Grace O'Malley]

You tipped on the. Like, it would have been part of the whole thing.

[Andrew Santino]

I gave the dollar on the. It Was a hot cup of poured strip. It's a dollar. The coffee was 250. What?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's, that's more than 50.

[Andrew Santino]

What do you want me to do?

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't know what the.

[Andrew Santino]

That's the problem. I say that to my wife all the time. Once when someone, we go out and somebody knows me, me, you know, if we're out at a restaurant, the guy's like, the server's like, big fan. And I'm like, now here we go. I have to over tip.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm gonna tip exactly what the order.

[Andrew Santino]

Now I have to over tip because if they know you, if they don't know you, it's great. Then I can just tip regular 20 some odd percent of whatever I usually do. If they know you.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Now I have to over.

[Grace O'Malley]

Now I'm, I'm going a little bit crazy with it now.

[Andrew Santino]

I feel like a fool. I do that all the time. And she's always like, you don't have to. I'm like, yeah, you do.

[Grace O'Malley]

I, I over tip. Just, just, just anyways, cuz working in those things, like, I was like, it would be so sick one day to be able to over tip somebody.

[Andrew Santino]

I like over tipping. I've never under tipped that, that I, that I've never done. But I will do appropriate tips. But if you're the. I sometimes do give people a lot more than I should.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I, I'll go the extra mile if someone gives me something for free. Oh, yeah, I'll charge me a penny so I can tip you. I don't have cash, that kind of thing.

[Andrew Santino]

We got to get you cash.

[Grace O'Malley]

Cash. Yeah, I gotta get a flavor Flav cash.

[Andrew Santino]

Come on, baby.

[Grace O'Malley]

I gotta empty out that atm.

[Andrew Santino]

Baby, get that money. Your sister's got all the money. I can tell. I know where the bank is.

[Grace O'Malley]

She handles everything.

[Andrew Santino]

You know where the bank is, baby.

[Grace O'Malley]

What else do I got here? Oh, who's on your Mount Rushmore? Of people from Chicago. Ooh.

[Andrew Santino]

Jordan is not from Chicago, but we own him a little bit as far as our heart goes, right? He's not, he's from North Carolina, but Chicago born and raised. Who's on my Mount Rushmore? Chicago born and raised. I loved Vince Vaughn my whole life and, like, knowing that he was Chicago. Yeah, I like, loved him as a kid, especially because, like, I was like, Chicago guy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

This is interesting. I don't know if he's on my Mount Rushmore, but like, Bob Odenkirk, I think, is like one of my favorite comedic actors. We've I've never met him and I would kill to work with him one day. And he's a Chicago guy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Would you ever like call him up to go on your part? Blood?

[Andrew Santino]

I, I would ask someone by way of, but I'm afraid like, he, he's just like a really intelligent, funny guy and I am intimidated by him.

[Grace O'Malley]

So, yeah, I was. I mean, I personally, if we're being honest about these things, I was, I was very nervous coming here. I don't know, I'm just a huge fan.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I love you so much.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was like, I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I would never make you feel stupid or bad or like, like. And I don't think anybody that I would ask would, but sometimes I get in my head that I think like a guy like Oda Kirk would be like, like, you're a podcast guy. Yeah, I'm an Emmy award winning actor. You. I don't know. He probably wouldn't be that way.

[Grace O'Malley]

And here I am thinking, oh, I'm just, I'm. I'm tick tock girl. Wanted to do standup girl thinking, you're.

[Andrew Santino]

Once you're a comic, you're all the same. But also like odenkirk's not a stand up. They're sketch guy, sketch and improv guys. And so that's a class thing too. They're better than us.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I mean, I don't think standups ever think they're better than sketch or improv, but I do think sketch and improv people think they're better than us. I'm not saying him, I'm saying saying communally. There's a thing that. They mock him. They mock stand ups.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't know why everyone can't just get along. Because I've heard standups mock improv.

[Andrew Santino]

No, I like, I think it's great.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think it's sick. It's like a, it's a whole different thing. I, I'd love to tap into.

[Andrew Santino]

Look, there's hacky about both of them.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's true.

[Andrew Santino]

Stand up is just as hacky as improv is just as hacky as sketch. We're all hacks. At the end of the day, we're just trying to make people feel something because we don't have a good grip on our own feelings.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I get that.

[Andrew Santino]

It's because your dad got electrocuted.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Just because your dad is my dad. Just Chicago.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, we're, we're siblings.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. It's when, when it gets down to it, I, I have a segment Here. Where I just kind of ask you to explain. It's called disgraceful receipts.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay.

[Grace O'Malley]

Things I found on the Internet of you, and I just like a little bit of an explanation, if that's all right.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you got it.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right, here we go.

[Andrew Santino]

This is. This is actually. This is for. This was the promo for the Special Olympics. Olympics. No, no, that was. I don't know. You know what's so funny is that was a. I think that was a photo shoot. I might be wrong, but a guy named Mino, Mino Palo and his daughter, we were at his studio at his house, and his daughter was, like, running around the room, and there was like a. It was like a tutu. It's like a. You know, whatever.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And he was like, you should put that on. And I was like, it's so small. And he's like, put it on your neck. And I loved it. I don't know why I put it on my neck and I look like.

[Grace O'Malley]

You go to the Met gal.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, well, yeah, this one's tough. Now, that's Photoshop. That's not me. No, that's me. That's. I used to hang out at the Abbey a lot back then. I was a West Hollywood bad boy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I was a leather daddy.

[Grace O'Malley]

Is this so, like, you. Were you pumped about this?

[Andrew Santino]

No, this is a. This was me trying to be funny.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

This is me thinking it was funny to put that on.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think it's funny. I just. You seem like a little like. Like. Like it fits too much. Like you're really, like, trying to.

[Andrew Santino]

Who I really want to be. It's my alter ego.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. What is name?

[Andrew Santino]

That's Bruce.

[Grace O'Malley]

Bruce, of course.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Yeah. What is that?

[Grace O'Malley]

This is.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, me holding a big. I'm taking a. In the air on at midnight. Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And Chris is loving that.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, for sure. Absolutely. Absolutely. This is.

[Grace O'Malley]

This working at the passport.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. This. Yeah. This at the music industry. That was the day with Flava Flav. This is me wearing. This is me in a movie I got cut out of called the Room with James Franco and Seth Rogen's movie. It was about the worst movie of all time. Tommy Wiseau's do you know this? You know this movie?

[Grace O'Malley]

Mm.

[Andrew Santino]

And I got cut out of that movie. They cut me out. I shaved, and I wore a wig for to be cut out.

[Grace O'Malley]

Damn.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it was really sad.

[Grace O'Malley]

There weren't that many people in that movie, so I got.

[Andrew Santino]

No, there were a lot more than you think. Really? I didn't make the cut. I was on the floor. By the way, you know what's all fucked up? I didn't make the cut. And I went to the premiere. Premiere. Do you know how much that hurts my feelings?

[Grace O'Malley]

Did you know that you got cut?

[Andrew Santino]

No, they don't. They don't. Yeah, I found out at the premiere.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, at the premiere?

[Andrew Santino]

Well, they. They maybe had me in a scene, but I don't talk. You don't see any of my stuff. And it hurt to a degree.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, stuff.

[Andrew Santino]

And I said to my wife, we were leaving, and it was up at the Egyptian Theater on how. In Hollywood. And at the time, we were living in West Hollywood. And she said, do you want to go to the after party? And I said, I want to jump off the roof of the Egyptian Theater. I don't. The after party? No. I'm gonna kill myself.

[Grace O'Malley]

What am I. Yeah, I'm gonna go.

[Andrew Santino]

Suck on Hollywood Boulevard. So we walked for a little while. Cause I was like, I'd like to walk. My anxiety was through the roof.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, shit.

[Andrew Santino]

I was so embarrassed that I got cut out, that I didn't want to be seen. So we walked home. But she's a dog. She's a homie. She walked with me. She was like, it's okay, because the drive. They give you a driver. And I was like, send him home.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, we're walking.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, we walked like, three miles. I was like, I need to walk it off, dude. Because I was. It fucked me up for a long time. I was bummed. I was like, oh, I didn't get anything in that. It's not even a big deal. But I just. It's like a. It hits.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, no, it hits.

[Andrew Santino]

It hits. It hits. It hits a type of way.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's nothing against you. I feel like.

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no. I just. I must not. There was nothing they could have used. It probably wasn't good enough.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, this is definitely good enough.

[Andrew Santino]

It's giving suicide the caption.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, you might want to kill yourself after seeing this one. And then the caption's pretty. Pretty bad, too.

[Andrew Santino]

Pure sex, you know, it's interesting. Did Justin post that?

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't think he would.

[Andrew Santino]

200 likes.

[Grace O'Malley]

Banger.

[Andrew Santino]

Banger. What does it say? 2000. What? 12?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I was 13.

[Andrew Santino]

Hot shit, dude. My little tiny penis. This is immmykimmel. Look at how young Justin is.

[Grace O'Malley]

That looks like someone's house.

[Andrew Santino]

No, that's backstage at Kimmel.

[Grace O'Malley]

Really?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. Yeah, that's in one of the rooms at Kimmel. Because here's why I wore that Speedo on Kimmel. We did a promo for Punk'd with him, and I was supposed to jump on the desk and bark like a dog on Jimmy Kimmel's desk.

[Grace O'Malley]

What happened?

[Andrew Santino]

I did. I did it. I ran out and did it.

[Grace O'Malley]

You get cut?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, it's on there. And Guillermo had a Taser. And that part of the bit was that they were gonna, like, have him chase me up, but he really tased me. And it hurt. Oh, yeah, it hurt like crazy. But that was tased beforehand. No, dude, that's.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's tough on live cameras.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, it sucked.

[Grace O'Malley]

Have you done the dog collar thing?

[Andrew Santino]

No. I refuse.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I don't think it's funny.

[Andrew Santino]

I feel like I'm gonna have a stroke and die, and that's how I die. I don't want that to be the way I go.

[Grace O'Malley]

It would be. Well, we're prone to electricity, but, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

It'S in your blood.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm a Boston cream pie. You just posted this.

[Andrew Santino]

I did.

[Grace O'Malley]

Is this your signature? Is this what you write?

[Andrew Santino]

That's what I wrote in Boston.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm a Boston cream pie.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think I saw this.

[Andrew Santino]

It was this at the Wilbur. Yeah. Yeah. Well, because they were like, what do you write on the wall? And I was like, I don't know. Fucking something. And then I think my. The guy Zach, who opens for me, we were joking around, and he said. He made a derogatory comment to me, and I said, I'm a little Boston cream pie.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then you guys have fun together on the road. He seems like a good duo.

[Andrew Santino]

He's the most goofball fun. The only thing I care about if an opener is, are you easygoing?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Like, are you a fun hang? And do you work hard on your own? Like, are you. Are you working hard on your stuff? And are you a good hang? And he's both. He's super funny, and he's a really dope hang, and that's all I care about. Don't complain. I don't want someone to be complaining. That's all I want is no one that's like, I don't like that. This is. It's like, dude, shut the up.

[Grace O'Malley]

What are we doing here?

[Andrew Santino]

People do. I know people complain a lot.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm very, very new, and I've had. I've even had openers do the same thing. And I'm like, just. What are we doing? What. Can we just be pumped to be here?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, you should be pumped. This is a free ride, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't understand it.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay, What's This.

[Grace O'Malley]

It looks like. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

What is that? Let me see you showing a little leg. This is on promoting at the Laugh Factory in Las Vegas when I played there with Sandro and Jeremiah. Unbelievably stoned, actually. You can kind of see it in my eyes. That's why I'm wearing a hat so low. But I was ripped off my head.

[Grace O'Malley]

I don't know why they still allow comedians on the news.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, this is so long ago, too. But, yeah, I. I don't think they should. It's embarrassing. We should not be on that.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's great. I did my first, like, little news zoom thing.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

And I. I had a bad hair day, so I tossed a hat on, and the hat said number one. The. The gloves.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, the Glizzy Goblin.

[Grace O'Malley]

The Glizzy Gobbler. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You loved Glizzies.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, it just was, you know, I thought it was a funny hat.

[Andrew Santino]

Do you love me?

[Grace O'Malley]

I love Glizzies. You know, don't make me do it.

[Andrew Santino]

I'll suck down six or seven Dodger Dogs. Don't get me started.

[Grace O'Malley]

I'm actually not even sure you're gonna have to explain on this one.

[Andrew Santino]

That's Adam, Ray, and I shooting a sketch about. That was our submission for the Olympics. Bobby Lee plays Hoota Tootie, our coach. That was, like, one of.

[Grace O'Malley]

The.

[Andrew Santino]

One of the first sketches we all did together.

[Grace O'Malley]

Did you guys have fun making those?

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, my God. Dude. That was back when everything was a favor. So we had to beg people for cameras and beg people, like, help edit and stuff. Those were really fun days. Now you shoot something and everybody. It's a little bit. It's just different back then. We was like. We were all on the same plane of, like, just trying to get it done.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's the. It's that favorite thing. It's like, yeah, you do this for me, and then I got you down the line. Yeah. People still doing that? I will say.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Certain. Yeah, they do.

[Grace O'Malley]

You know, this is.

[Andrew Santino]

That's your dad?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, no, my dad's much way more.

[Andrew Santino]

That's. Who's that? Like, the head of the unions in Boston or something? Who the. Who is?

[Grace O'Malley]

I thought maybe it was your principal.

[Andrew Santino]

Let me see. My principal?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yep. Your principal.

[Andrew Santino]

Well, I'm 41. I don't remember what they. Well, what's this guy's name?

[Grace O'Malley]

I can't recall. I thought maybe we would have got you on.

[Andrew Santino]

Honestly, I'm being very honest with you. This is, like, a scary thing to admit.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't remember any of my teachers names. Oh, I don't remember anything. I had. Something bad happened to me.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I don't know it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, boy.

[Andrew Santino]

But it must have.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's nice. It's nice. That's kind of like a cool, cool thing that your body does.

[Andrew Santino]

My memory is so bad with school when people are like, oh, Mrs. Schoenfield from fourth grade. And I'm like, nope. I remember Mr. Miller because he. I had to stay in from. For lunch every day. He wouldn't let me go out. Yeah, you got one, Miller?

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I remember Mrs. Rose who asked my mom if I was on medication. And she stood up for me. She's like, your son needs medication. And my mom was like, my son doesn't need anything. You need to mind your own business.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

And I was like, yeah, Mommy, take that road, you pig. She's dead. She's 100.

[Grace O'Malley]

All the best ones.

[Andrew Santino]

She was 70 back then. And then. The only one. The only other one I remember is Mr. I see his face. He was like my. He was like our econ teacher. But he'd show up drunk.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's classic.

[Andrew Santino]

He was so dope.

[Grace O'Malley]

You gotta have one.

[Andrew Santino]

He was like on his way out. He had tenure. And he would show up, just up, and he would have booze in his coffee. And it wasn't even like a bit. It wasn't that. It was like a. Not like a high school rumor. Like. But there's booze in his coffee. You legitimately looked at it. You're like, that's not coffee. Yeah, that's literally not coffee. It's just not coffee. Coffee is not that consistency. It never has been. He would get fudgeing drunk. Yeah. So I don't. But teachers and all that stuff. Like, dude, it's wild. I have.

[Grace O'Malley]

You didn't have, like, a teacher that was like. Like, oh, that teacher changed my life. Because I didn't.

[Andrew Santino]

I know I didn't really have one that did the thing. No, I think I had, like. I had cool teachers in college, Professors that I thought were fucking rad. That, like, let me be free. And where'd you go? Arizona State.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's right.

[Andrew Santino]

Harvard of the West.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. That is. Is. Isn't it hard to get into.

[Andrew Santino]

It's. It's so hard that I almost didn't get in the first time. Seriously, I almost didn't get in.

[Grace O'Malley]

Well, I graduated high school with a 1.59.

[Andrew Santino]

My girl. Dude, I knew I loved you. Yeah, dude, I think I was a 262 6.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's enough to get you to ASU.

[Andrew Santino]

Barely, dude.

[Grace O'Malley]

I was looking it up all the time. I'm like, dude, that looks like a fun party school. And I think I could get in.

[Andrew Santino]

Where'd you go?

[Grace O'Malley]

Community college.

[Andrew Santino]

Cc.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, baby.

[Andrew Santino]

Where's the community college? In Mass.

[Grace O'Malley]

In Massachusetts. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

So great.

[Grace O'Malley]

And then I transferred, and then I dropped out.

[Andrew Santino]

She went to real school. Hey.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Where'd you go? Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

She was first to graduate.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

With the whole family.

[Andrew Santino]

With what, though?

[Grace O'Malley]

Doesn't matter. She was the first to graduate college.

[Andrew Santino]

And what is she doing now?

[Grace O'Malley]

Working for assistant.

[Andrew Santino]

Working for big sis, baby. Don't ever forget that. Where your British buttered? Yeah, no, I. I went to Arizona State. I'm one of, like, my only friends that actually graduated on time.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, really?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. The other guys took about seven or eight years.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, I mean, out of my crew, three dropped out. So one was delayed, and then another one was delayed five years.

[Andrew Santino]

Wow.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Like with the pandemic, I think.

[Andrew Santino]

Oh, panty, you're right. Yeah. You guys went ahead to go through that.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah, that's why I dropped out. But, yeah, whatever.

[Andrew Santino]

It is what it is, dude. You have such a bright, fun career. I can't wait to see what happens. I mean, I'll be dead soon, but really, I'll watch you from the afterlife.

[Grace O'Malley]

You look better now than you do in those pictures.

[Andrew Santino]

That's 100% true. That's kind of crazy. Money does a little bit of good for you, but also, I'm gonna retire soon. I'm out.

[Grace O'Malley]

Really?

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah.

[Grace O'Malley]

You don't do it for the love of the game.

[Andrew Santino]

No, man.

[Grace O'Malley]

You done. Damn, that's. That's tough.

[Andrew Santino]

I want to move. I'm trying to move.

[Grace O'Malley]

Are you doing Allison?

[Andrew Santino]

No, no, no, no.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay. All right.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm going to move.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah. Okay.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm going to probably move to Montana.

[Grace O'Malley]

Montana.

[Andrew Santino]

Montana.

[Grace O'Malley]

Nice. French Montana.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah, I want to move to French Montana.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Yeah. I'm gonna open up a comedy club there.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's just Kansas. Canada. Yeah, it is French Montana.

[Andrew Santino]

That's Texas in the north.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

I'm going to open up a comedy club called the Brothership.

[Grace O'Malley]

It's just black comics. What's the deal there?

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. Funk music and soul every night of the week.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay. I think Chappelle just did that. It's in Ohio.

[Andrew Santino]

Okay. Dude, that's Yellow Springs. This is Billings, Montana.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay. A little different.

[Andrew Santino]

Come on down to the Brothership. Preach. That's what it says when you walk in. Preach.

[Grace O'Malley]

Preach. Speaking of songs, what's your walkout song.

[Andrew Santino]

It changes a lot. But right now it's OT Genesis. I look good. It's just hype and stupid. And I think like they drop it right when it hits. And the crowd, it's like their noise matches how you're not really even hearing it. Yeah, but you can just feel this, like Spanish guitar.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, that's good.

[Andrew Santino]

But it changes all the time. But that's what it's. That. That's what it was on my last tour. I shot the special.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's a classic.

[Andrew Santino]

That's a. I look real good. You look good today. I love how it's. Honestly, it's truly. It's truly just him. He's just jumping on like a little wave. I'm sure he went in the studio. The. The song itself is a minute, a minute, 17 seconds.

[Grace O'Malley]

Figured. Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

You know, he went in the studio and was like, I look good today. And someone's like, put that on track on I play that.

[Grace O'Malley]

The brothership Mar.

[Andrew Santino]

That's right. Come to the brothers ship.

[C]

You see where your business can go. To get there, you may need another 10 trucks. At Sentry Insurance, we put more than 115 years of industry experience to work to help protect you as you launch a new delivery service or expand into a new region and reach your business goals. Sentry right by you. Property and casualty coverages are underwritten and safety services are provided by by a member of the Century Insurance group, Stevens Point, Wisconsin. For a complete listing of companies, visit century.com policies, coverages, benefits and discounts are not available in all states. E Policy for complete coverage details.

[Andrew Santino]

Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. With the price of just about everything going up, we thought we'd bring our prices down. So to help us, we brought in a reverse auctioneer, which is apparently a thing Mint Mobile unlimited premium wireless.

[Grace O'Malley]

30. 30.

[C]

Get 30. Better get 20. 20, 20, 20.

[Grace O'Malley]

15.

[Andrew Santino]

15. 15, 15.

[C]

Just 15 bucks a month.

[Andrew Santino]

Sold. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment.

[Grace O'Malley]

Of $45 for three month plan equivalent.

[Andrew Santino]

To $15 per month required.

[Grace O'Malley]

New customer offer for first three months only. Speed slow after 35 gigabytes of networks busy. Taxes and fees extra. See mint mobile.com now this is the part where you plug and promo.

[Andrew Santino]

I think plug and promo. Watch one of my 19 podcasts, Whiskey Ginger if you want me. And interviewing young human humans. This human is going to come on soon. What's that you said?

[Grace O'Malley]

No, no, I said I'm super pumped.

[Andrew Santino]

But okay, good.

[Grace O'Malley]

I like.

[Andrew Santino]

And then for some reason and we're Having a drink, by the way. So get. We're gonna get tuned up and then please listen to Bad Friends and watch it everywhere it's possible. And then if you like golf. I know it's lame for a lot of people, but I interview celebrities and athletes and famous people that you may know that like golf. And I try to blend this philosophy of golf and life. It's called no Bad Lies. Watch that. And then that's it. I got a special coming out in September on Hulu. Please watch that part of the Hulu Larious. I'm hoolarious. I love it. They pitched it to us. They were like, how is it, bro? Was like, could you believe this? He was so mad we were in New York. He's like, dude, what the.

[Grace O'Malley]

Hilarious.

[Andrew Santino]

Throw me off a bridge.

[Grace O'Malley]

No, it's good. What the.

[Andrew Santino]

I think it's just a funny campaign. I. I don't. I'm like trying to figure out a way to market it when the time comes. So this summer I'm going to be working on marketing the show. I don't even have a name for the spot special.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, really?

[Andrew Santino]

Name it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Name it. Just call it. Name it.

[Andrew Santino]

That's good.

[Grace O'Malley]

That's untitled.

[Andrew Santino]

Untitled Andrew Santino.

[Grace O'Malley]

What should I call this?

[Andrew Santino]

What should I call?

[Grace O'Malley]

Just be blonde about it? I don't know.

[Andrew Santino]

I could do.

[Grace O'Malley]

Yeah.

[Andrew Santino]

Tariffs.

[Grace O'Malley]

Tariffs. You talk a lot about tariffs on Big T. Yeah, big tariffs.

[Andrew Santino]

That's all I talk about, dude, is tariffs.

[Grace O'Malley]

Buy low, sell high.

[Andrew Santino]

Price of eggs. I might call it price of eggs. I do have a name for. For it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Oh, you do?

[Andrew Santino]

I'll tell you off air.

[Grace O'Malley]

All right.

[Andrew Santino]

We haven't made it official yet, so. Cuz I don't know if I'm going to keep it.

[Grace O'Malley]

Okay. I like. I love the names of things like tours and. And specials.

[Andrew Santino]

So hard to do. Cuz you. You're like. They're corny and stupid, but you're like, what? You got to do it.

[Grace O'Malley]

I think it's cool. You guys are also jaded. It's. It's. It's tough to watch. Anyways, thank you so much.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you so much. Thanks for having me. Bye.

[Grace O'Malley]

Thank you, man.

[Andrew Santino]

Thank you. Foreign.

[C]

You see where your business can go. To get there, you may need another 10 trucks. At Sentry Insurance, we put more than 115 years of industry experience to work to help protect you as you launch a new delivery service or expand into a new region and reach your business goals. Sentry right by you. Property and casualty coverages are underwritten and safety services are provided by a member the of of the Sentry Insurance group, Stevens Point, Wisconsin. For a complete listing of companies, visit century.com policies, coverage as benefits and discounts are not available on all state C policy. For complete coverage details not sure if.

[Grace O'Malley]

You have the experience to start your.

[Andrew Santino]

Dream job, good news these days, it's the skills that count. Udemy can help you get those in demand. Skills Want to be an AI mastermind? Learn with us Game Developer. We've got you covered. AWS Certified Cloud Practitioner. We can help you prep. You'll learn from real world experts who love what they do so that you can love what you do. Go to udemy.com for the skills to get you started and get set for your dream job. Imagine relying on a dozen different software.

[C]

Programs to run your business, none of.

[Andrew Santino]

Which are connected, and each one more expensive and more complicated than the last. It can be pretty stressful.

[C]

Now imagine Odoo.

[Andrew Santino]

Odoo has all the programs you'll ever.

[C]

Need and are all connected on one platform.

[Andrew Santino]

Doesn't matter. Odoo sound amazing.

[C]

Let Odoo harmonize your business with simple, efficient software that can handle everything for a fraction of the price. Sign up [e-mail] that's o d o o dot com.