Blimp-fluencer: Lindsey Fishman

Summary

Disgraceful with Grace O'Malley

Episode: "Blimp-fluencer: Lindsey Fishman"

Date: May 28, 2026

Host: Grace O’Malley (Unwell)
Guest: Lindsey Fishman
Special Contributor/HR: Nora O’Malley

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Main Theme & Purpose

This week’s Disgraceful spotlights the meteoric rise (and general chaos) of comedian and TikTok personality Lindsey Fishman, as she ‘auditions’ to be Grace’s permanent co-host. The episode is packed with candid stories of Midwest-to-LA transition, navigating viral fame, wild stories from adolescence, confronting toxic institutions (Greek life, work, and family), and a lot of riffing on internet culture, gender expectations, and what it means to be “prepared for anything ever.” It’s rapid-fire, deeply personal, irreverently funny, and full of bits, with a sharp self-awareness about the comedy world and the online era.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Digital Disconnection & Modern Boundaries

• Both host and guest riff about living in “Do Not Disturb” mode, relating it to their need for downtime and boundaries.
  • "I use Do Not Disturb the same way people use drugs. It's like, secretively." —Lindsey (01:22)
  • Annoyance at people bypassing DND with "push notifications"—a digital etiquette red flag.

2. Warm-Up Word Association & Cheerleading Trauma

• Lindsey’s cheerleading past comes up: kicked off multiple teams, standing with locked knees, forced participation.
  • "My knees were so locked they were going backwards. I'm not doing this." —Lindsey (03:15)
• Grace tries out for cheerleading every year, makes B team once, but is pulled out for “bullying.”
  • Discussions of gender and respect in cheerleading, tongue-in-cheek appreciation for “jacked” gay male cheerleaders.
  • Insightful aside on social hierarchies in high school sports.

3. Gender Roles: Men as “Drama Divas” vs. Prepared Women

• Lindsey relates how her boyfriend, Trevor, freaks out over minor health issues.
  • "Men are so drama compared to women. He thinks he has pink eye; I think he's just tired." —Lindsey (06:03)
  • "As women, I've been going by the saying—be prepared for anything ever." —Lindsey (07:01)
• Contrasts women's ability to adapt/spend the night anywhere, versus men needing their routines.

4. Tattoo Stories & France Escapades

• Lindsey discusses getting several tattoos during a five-day Paris trip—prefers souvenirs with permanence.
  • Most-loved tattoo: her cat, Sully. (09:50)
  • Grace observes, “You gotta stamp your skin.” (09:20)

5. Work, Zoom, & Quitting Jobs

• Lindsey shares losing or quitting jobs due to Zoom-related shenanigans, marking new chapters in her career.
  • “Last time I was here I quit my job. On Grace’s podcast, entering a new chapter tomorrow.” —Lindsey (10:54)

6. Family Turmoil & Comedy as Coping

• Lindsey references getting a restraining order against her dad—turning difficult family situations into stand-up material.
  • “Writing a joke about it.” —Lindsey (11:27)
  • Grace: “Good jokes. Great for stand-up.” (11:24)

7. Kicked Out of Sorority & Digital Activism

• Lindsey was ejected from Pi Beta Phi for hacking the Instagram to expose racist internal messages.
  • “They did, like, 'Aryan Race Nurses 4.0.' I exposed those messages.” —Lindsey (54:36)
  • Uses her “platform” to confront racism; reflects on changing values in Greek life.

8. Internet Conspiracies & Navigating Online Fame

• Conversation about conspiracies, TikTok, blimp experiences (Lollapalooza!), and being new to viral fame.
  • “I posted my first TikTok like a year ago today.” —Lindsey (16:19)
• Lindsey became one of the rare few to ride in a blimp—vows to do it again.

9. Midwest to LA: Culture Shock, Community, and “Ohio Law”

• Riff on the tendency of Ohioans to leave, the unfair hotness of Cincinnati men, and the unique “Cleveland” identity.
  • Clevelanders see themselves as separate from the rest of Ohio—“Cleveland is not a part of Ohio.” —Lindsey (22:58)
• Insider LA stories: nearly getting arrested at a Housewives after-party for defending a friend, run-ins with pseudo-celebrities.

10. LA Life & Celebrity Sightings

• Grace recounts after-party drama; Lindsey talks about chance encounters with famous comics (e.g., Tim Dillon).
  • Dillon stories, attempts to get him on the pod, and the “goal” of being followed on Twitter (25:21).

11. “RAPID FIRE” Segment & Mall Shooting Story

• Quick word associations, leading to stories on dogs, dead pets, identity theft apathy.
• Nora details surviving a mall shooting; family’s painfully casual reaction—a portrait of millennial coping with trauma.

12. Viral Infamy & Dark Side of Internet Fame

• Lindsey discovers her images being shared in bizarre Telegram groups where people use her videos for inappropriate activities.
• Both riff on the inescapability and weirdness of viral attention.

13. Childhood, Sibling Dynamics, & High School Bullies

• Reflections on high school bullies now hunting for her attention online (“It’s sad.”)
• Discuss the archetype of the mean girl/gay best friend duo as “the most threatening” social force.
• Stories about cosplaying for Model UN (as North Korea), scaling Cleveland buildings, and navigating girlhood in Ohio.

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Notable Quotes & Laugh-Out-Loud Moments

• On Digital Boundaries

  • "I use Do Not Disturb the same way that people use drugs. It's like, secretively. And I have no plans or intentions to ever stop." —Lindsey (01:22)

• On Cheerleading Politics

  • "I would stand there, fist down like Arthur." —Lindsey (03:10)
  • "If you're a man and you're gay and you're a cheerleader, you're above all gay men—and all men in general." —Lindsey (05:14)

• On Gender & Preparedness

  • "Women are always prepared for anything ever. Men are not." —Lindsey (07:01)
  • "We craft a toothbrush out of milk carton." —Grace (07:31)

• On Getting Kicked Out of Pi Beta Phi

  • "I hacked their Instagram and basically exposed them... I posted stuff for Black Lives Matter. They only wanted skinny blonde hair, blue eyes. Aryan Race Nurses 4.0." —Lindsey (54:36)
  • "Getting kicked out was good. It made me feel somewhat fulfilled as a person." —Lindsey (13:17)

• On TikTok & Newfound Popularity

  • "I posted my first TikTok a year ago today. I don't know what the f** to do with myself."* —Lindsey (16:21)
  • "Blimp-maxing for the rest of my life." —Lindsey (17:22)

• On LA/Ohio Culture

  • “People who leave Ohio rock. There’s something about Ohio… We love where we’re from for some reason, but we get the fuck out.” —Lindsey (17:25 & 17:31)
  • "Cleveland is its own island, but a good island." —Lindsey (23:28)

• On Tim Dillon

  • "My 2026 goal was to do standup at Zanies and to get Tim Dillon to follow me back. And you did? Double yes." —Lindsey (25:21)
  • “He kept waking me up going, ‘It’s delayed again.’” —Grace on Tim Dillon (26:25)

• On High School Bullies

  • “My high school bully just liked my Instagram post for the first time.” —Lindsey (56:02)
  • “Do you think she knows she's the bully when she sees a video of you saying your high school bully liked [your post]?” —Grace (56:14)

• On Mall Shooting Family Reaction

  • “She called all of us. None of us answered.” —Grace (29:59)
  • “Funniest thing is that she was in a Spencer’s. Nobody goes into a Spencer’s unless you’re kind of forced to.” —Lindsey (30:06)

• On Exposing Greek Life Racism

  • “I exposed those messages. Then that narc class came in and they're like, ‘Aryan race only.’” —Lindsey (54:36)

• On Telegram/Internet Weirdness

  • “There’s this deep cut dark web app where people sell drugs, but they also make group chats to do weird shit—people are putting their dicks, jerking off to my face.” —Lindsey (48:41)

• End-of-Episode Shout-Outs (63:48)

  • "Shout out to my urethra—that’s very tiny according to my gyno. Shout out to raisins but not ET.” —Lindsey (64:35)
  • "Shout out, Merry Christmas. I just want to say Merry Christmas to you guys and also all the other holidays you may celebrate." —Grace (64:00)

---

Timestamps for Major Segments

• 01:22 – The cult of “Do Not Disturb” and new gestures for digital boundaries
• 03:00 – Word association launches into cheerleading trauma, school sports politics
• 05:04 – Gendered drama and preparedness: “Men are divas”
• 07:01 – Women are always prepared, men refuse spontaneous sleepovers
• 09:00 – Tattoos, France, and souvenirs you can’t return
• 10:39 – How Lindsey got fired (Zoom meeting gone wrong), quitting jobs
• 13:11 – Getting kicked out of pi beta phi for activism; exposing racism
• 16:19 – TikTok career, imposter syndrome, the blimp story
• 17:31 – Midwest-to-LA transitions, Ohio pride, and Chappelle’s town
• 25:30 – Tim Dillon anecdotes and comedy goals
• 28:30 – Surviving mall shootings, family’s underwhelming response
• 37:01 – LA health trends: raw milk, Erewhon, and bodily disgust
• 40:02 – Town Hall in Cleveland, the perils of referencing local villains
• 42:08 – Lindsey as an accidental LinkedIn influencer—"syndicating the shit out of LinkedIn"
• 54:00 – Deep dive into the sorority Instagram expose; racism receipts
• 56:00 – High school bullies, social media, and retroactive guilt
• 57:01 – Mean girl/hot gay bestie as "most threatening duo"
• 60:33 – Model UN, cosplaying North Korea, preemptively warding off cancellation
• 62:37 – High school escapades, parties, formative stories
• 64:35 – Final rapid-fire shout-outs and call-outs

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Tone & Style

• Chaotic, affectionate, sharp, and relentlessly irreverent.
• Extensive use of riffing, bits, and meta-commentary on podcasting and online culture.
• Humor is direct, self-deprecating, sometimes dark but always with camaraderie.
• Guest and host regularly break the fourth wall, critique their own bits, and play with cancel culture discourse.

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For Listeners: Why This Episode Works

• Unfiltered look at Gen Z/Millennial internet fame: What it’s like to go viral, to be the subject of weird Telegram groups, and to ride the “blimp” of fleeting online coolness.
• No topic is too taboo: From family trauma to shady Greek life, dead pets to LA wellness fads, everything is on the table and delivered with a wink.
• Survival & boundary-setting: Stories about digital disconnect, surviving trauma, and “emotionally evolving” (or not) are threaded through the chaos.
• Comedy as healing: The episode is a masterclass in turning discomfort and adversity into humor and resilience.

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In summary:
This is an hour-long comedy free-for-all, grounded in the chaotic but heartfelt lives of two comedians making sense of the world, the internet, and their own pasts. It’s both a wild audition and a love letter to the modern mess, inviting listeners to laugh (and maybe wince), but always relate.

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(For direct pull-quotes and memorable bits, see above. For segment deep-dives, see timestamps.)

Transcript

[Announcer]

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[Host]

Ah.

[Commercial Voice]

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[Host]

It's so funny to meet and just get right into it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I know.

[Host]

Yeah. It's like, this is like.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's also like, I feel like I'm in your DMs all the time, dude.

[Host]

I talk to you more than, like, half of my hometown friends.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's like, animal, do not disturb. All the fucking time.

[Host]

Me too, dude.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Which is, like. It's really hard to get through to me. I know.

[Host]

It's really bad. I should be better. But it's just like, I'll get distracted. I have add.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

So I'm just like.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, putting up a fence. But it's like, I use Do Not Disturb the same way that people use drugs. It's like, secretively.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And I have no plans or intentions to ever stop. And people are like, this is really bad.

[Host]

Like, and everybody knows because it's no secret. It tells on you.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, I know.

[Host]

Yeah, I know.

[Lindsay Fishman]

But then there's a push. Like, what is it called? Like, a push notify. Anyway, whatever. And I'm like, that pissed me off. Like, if you do that, I'm not talking to you for a month.

[Host]

That's a yeah. To go the double whammy with it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Like, what do you need?

[Host]

Call me if you need something. Call me.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah. Also, you can, but you got to call twice.

[Host]

And Nora gets so pissed at me because I'm always on do not disturb. She's like, you need to answer these questions you don't even have.

[Guest/Listener]

Like, you'll not be on do not disturb me. You just don't have your notifications that pop up.

[Host]

Yeah, that's a Glitch on the phone

[Guest/Listener]

just for my contact.

[Host]

It's apple.

[Announcer]

Sure.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think that's like a. A setting that you pick. Like, I think you worked us out.

[Host]

I want to hear from her. All right, let's get this fucking shit. All right, I'm gonna. I'm gonna start this up with a little. Little warm up here.

[Lindsay Fishman]

All right?

[Host]

So we got. We got some words. We got some phrases, and I'm gonna. I'm gonna have you say what comes to your mind when you hear these words and phrases. Bison. Cheerleading. I love you, nails. Shout out. 9, 11. Shout out. God bless you.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, my God. That is a deep cut.

[Host]

Yeah, so Nora gets creepy with these.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You're like, yeah, that's absurd.

[Host]

She's really good.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Bison. Truly. My mom made me. I got kicked off the team because at some point, I was like, I'm fed up. I had nothing left in my tank. I would stand their fist down, like, by my side, like, Arthur.

[Host]

Oh, God.

[Lindsay Fishman]

So then I.

[Host]

So you. You were standing clean, though?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, I was standing.

[Host]

Girl stand clean.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I was sharp. Like, my knees were so locked, they were going backwards. I'm like, I'm not doing this. Like, I'm done. I was so fed up with it.

[Host]

But that was like, is that competitive cheerleading or is that, like, I was enrolling? Both.

[Lindsay Fishman]

The ones I go, Y, E, L, L. But then the ones that are like, bison ladies.

[Host]

Like, that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I was in both.

[Host]

And, like, you just said, two chance. I don't have the. I don't know what that means.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's, like, the ones where it's like, let me twist you into the air and, like, throw you around.

[Host]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Like a volleyball.

[Host]

Yep.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then it's, like, on one of those, like, cheerleading competitive floors that, like, bounce.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. And you have to have your back Handspringer. You're not on the team. Yeah, I learned that quick. I. I tried out for the cheerleading team every year of my life. Why would you do that? And I never made it because all my friends were on the cheerleading team. And I was like, yo, guys, this year's the fucking year. And then the year I made it, I made B team. And then we bullied some girl. And my parents were like, I don't like what's happening here. So we're not paying for you to be on the B team so you can support the A team.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Good for them.

[Host]

Yeah. No, I was pissed. I heard. I, like. I was, like, hiding under my bed, scream, crying. I was like, bullshit. It's just, like, I was so fucking mad, man.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Were your friends that were on the A team cheerleading team, were they good people, dude?

[Host]

Oh, were they good people. But they were damn good at cheerleader, dude. They won states every year. Shout out. Bulldogs. You got the vices, I got the Bulldogs.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Lady Bison.

[Host]

Lady Bison. God forbid, you. They think you're a man Bison.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, right.

[Host]

You gotta have the lady in the front. You make sure you know what's up.

[Lindsay Fishman]

The Man Bisons were so pathetic, though.

[Host]

What? The. The gay cheerleaders.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There weren't any.

[Host]

Oh, there weren't.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's just like.

[Host]

Because they strong guys.

[Lindsay Fishman]

They what?

[Host]

The gay cheerleaders are the strong guys. I'm sorry, am I speaking Spanish?

[Lindsay Fishman]

No, I'm just, like, thinking about it. I'm like, yeah, that's true.

[Host]

Yeah, they're.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's like the biggest flex.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

If you're a man and you're gay and you're a cheerleader, you're above all gay men.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And all men in general. 100 jacked.

[Host]

You're jacked.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And you can do flips.

[Host]

You can do flips. You live in every guy's dream. The guys on the football team, like, wish I was gay, dude. Gets to chill with all those chicks all day. You this talk. Touchdown, dude, I, I, I, I know the mind of a football player like none other. I think I was, as a football player in another life. What do you think you were in another life? Free throw question.

[Lindsay Fishman]

This is my first one.

[Host]

This is your first one? First life. Well, welcome home.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Learning so much. Whoever evolves next out of me is gonna have, like, they're gonna thank me indefinitely.

[Host]

Oh, wow. You. You're really getting in touch with what's going on in the world and what's happening.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's wars and shit.

[Host]

There's wars.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And if anybody complains to me, this is another thing. Like, the other day, Trevor was like, oh, I think I got pink.

[Host]

Trevor's her boyfriend.

[Lindsay Fishman]

This motherfucker. Men are so drama compared to women. I will say this because he woke up the other day and he's like, I think I got pink. I'm like, I think that you're just fucking tired.

[Host]

Yeah, I think he just. I think you slept on your pillow a little bit and you got a swollen eye, kid.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, give it two minutes ago with this talking about drama. You prompted me to say something.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. A past life.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, men are just diva. This might be his first time living because he's so diva. He was like, yeah, I might have pink eye. I'm like, no, you just slept on your pillow wrong. Next thing I know, he's on the phone with the chief of Kaiser Permanente. Like, what?

[Host]

I don't even know what that is.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Insurance.

[Host]

Oh, wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Insurance, Healthcare system. I'm like, how the are you on the phone with this over some pink. You. This is your first time living.

[Host]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Good luck to the next person. You're learning nothing in this life.

[Host]

At least he's not calling like his mom.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He's just getting.

[Host]

He's going right to the source. He's like, I gotta make sure I have insurance. He actually kind of sounds like he's got a shit. Like, at least he's dealing with it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

But also, like, as women, I've been going by the saying where it's like, be prepared for anything ever. Like, be like, I'm always prepared for anything ever. Men are not.

[Host]

Yeah. No. Guys can't go out on the fly.

[Lindsay Fishman]

No.

[Host]

No. Because they expect everything to be easy breezy. And then once there's an obstacle, they're like, I love this roadblock.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I love it.

[Host]

Cannot turn ahead.

[Lindsay Fishman]

This proves an amazing point, because the other day, he came over to my house, we went to dinner, and we were planning to go back to his house, and I was like, fuck, I'm tired. Like, I can't drive. I can't do this. I'm like, do you want to sleep over? He's like, I'm not prepared for the next day.

[Host]

What do you mean? Women do it all the time. We're using toothbrushes. We craft a toothbrush out of milk carton.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Literally. My hair.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, let me just put some toothpaste on this string of hair, floss it through each one of my teeth. I'm fine.

[Host]

Yeah, everything's gonna be all right.

[Lindsay Fishman]

We got.

[Host]

You know, you gotta utilize what you have. Yeah, I'm gonna borrow a T shirt.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah. I need to learn the concept of be prepared for anything ever.

[Host]

Wow. So he can't. He can't just willy nilly, sleepover. That's crazy, dude. What does he need?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Shirt.

[Host]

Shirt. Got shirt. You got shirt. You got oversized shirt.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I have your underwear. I have all of your pants because I steal them. I have all of your clothes.

[Host]

Yeah, just take something.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He's like, I don't know if I want to wear that tomorrow. I'm like, well, you're gonna wear it.

[Host]

Oh, he sounds like a little. Hey, Trevor. You're kind of a little. Just kidding, Trip. I don't know him that well. We sat down and had one of These one time, and I'm like, yeah, that's my boy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He opens up his phone, like, the next day, and he's like, oh, my God. Grizzle Melee's Call me a.

[Host]

What did I do?

[Lindsay Fishman]

He's amazing, though. He's a good.

[Host]

No, he seems like a great guy,

[Lindsay Fishman]

but it's like, be prepared for anything ever.

[Host]

Yeah. And they just never are. No, never are.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I am, though.

[Host]

You are? Always. Because women are.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Because I didn't have any clothes after the gym and now I'm wearing a vintage 911 shirt.

[Host]

Damn straight. You're every woman. So tattoos in France?

[Lindsay Fishman]

My entire arm. Literally my entire arm.

[Host]

It's too bad. And I love. Okay, perfect. Low key.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know what? I just get, like, the twin tattoos.

[Host]

Well, you got those all in France?

[Lindsay Fishman]

No, like a majority, though. I think I got one too.

[Host]

How long were you in France?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Five days.

[Host]

Five days, Five tattoos people get.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Come back with your arms sore? No, but it's like, people come back with, like, a postcard. I'm like, no, it let me have something perm now on my body.

[Host]

Yeah, you got to stamp your skin.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

Clown. I thought that was cool. Clucks for a second there. That's clown.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's clown.

[Host]

That's. Oh, thank God. That's on you forever. I should not have said that. Just, you know, if you meet someone new, though, just like, really point out, like, hey, nice to meet you, Clown. Clown. Those are really cool, though. Well, what's your favorite one out of

[Lindsay Fishman]

the ones from France or the ones in general?

[Host]

Just in general, dude.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I like my cat.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. Dude, that's awesome.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Thank you.

[Host]

What's your kitty name?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Sully.

[Host]

Sully.

[Lindsay Fishman]

She's a little girl, like, most of Zinc style. Yeah, exactly.

[Host]

My favorite movie.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then this is it.

[Host]

Is it a blue cat?

[Lindsay Fishman]

She got blue eyes. Kind of matches the Ku Klux Klan.

[Host]

Yeah, I got 911 on my. So nice meeting you. What about no camera zoom calls? Hey, guys, tune into YouTube and watch us laugh. If there's any lows, it's because we're laughing and it's fun to watch online and on YouTube. They're telling me to. I gotta make the push for YouTube. It's song.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Go to YouTube.

[Host]

So no Zoom. Okay. With zoom calls.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's how I got fired.

[Host]

Oh, wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

The last time I was here, I had, like, my laptop on the floor. I was supposed to be in a meeting. I was like, on the verge of getting fired here at the Unwell Studios.

[Host]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes. The same day that I Did another podcast. I quit.

[Host]

Yes.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I quit my job.

[Host]

Well, that's actually dirty of you. I did that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, that was a new chapter. Like, the last time I was here. Entered a new chapter. I'm like on Grace's podcast, entering a new chapter tomorrow. Yeah.

[Host]

What are you going for? What's, what's our next chapter?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Restraining order against my dad.

[Host]

Okay. Yeah. Do you want to talk about that

[Lindsay Fishman]

or what do you want to know?

[Host]

I just, I, I, I know that I know what, I know what a, a tough time with your dad can be. But here, look at us. We're laughing, we're having fun.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Hilarious.

[Host]

Yeah. Good jokes. Great for stand up.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Thank you. I'm writing a joke about it.

[Host]

Yep. I'm still working. Ah.

[Commercial Voice]

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[Host]

You're home to show off who you are. And Ashley has styles that balance timeless appeal and modern trends to bring your personal look home. The eye catching designs of Ashley's pieces is one thing, but they're also made with features like stain resistant performance fabrics that are incredibly durable, easy to clean, and stain resistant with machine washable cushion covers. So not only do their pieces look great in your home, they function well in your life too. I'll tell you, you gotta check out this Alyssa Court collection that they have. It is so beautiful. It is so timeless. It's an absolute perfect piece for your home. If you're looking to furnish your house, Ashley has you covered. So I gotta tell you, Ashley provides fast, reliable white glove delivery right to your room of choice. Well crafted, affordable, and built to stand up to real life. How furniture should be. So visit your local Ashley store or head to Ashley.com to find your style. So let's, let's talk PI Beta Phi. Your eyes got big on that one. What do we do? You got kicked out.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah. Standing on business.

[Host]

So I'm sorry I brought up you losing your job and then you getting kicked out of sorority.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Getting kicked out was good. Was very good for me because it made me feel somewhat fulfilled as a person.

[Host]

Well, yeah, I feel like it's a circle of life.

[Lindsay Fishman]

They were being racist where I was like, oh, yeah, I hacked Their Instagram. And you did.

[Host]

Wait, wait, let's get into that. I like that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I hacked their Instagram and I basically exposed them.

[Host]

They were kind of racist stuff. Are they doing? They get clown tattoos.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Hey, I actually got one. We are triangles. Like kkk?

[Host]

No, that's a Illuminati. Oh. Which is good around here.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think it's like the same thing.

[Host]

We're filming in la.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Have you been to the Church of Scientology?

[Host]

They, no. I'm waiting for them to approach me and I'm up and coming, so they should want me. I, I, it's any day now.

[Lindsay Fishman]

While I'm here, you can connect. Oh, wow, an ex.

[Host]

Oh, what a past. That is nice.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I didn't know for so long.

[Host]

Keeping it a secret.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, he was like, I don't know how to tell someone this because the last time I told someone, they left. So his mom wrote him out something very long and detailed in his notes app to share with them when he

[Host]

was about to ask him to be Mommy did that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes. Oh, and that just shows you. Church of Scientology, hello.

[Host]

God bless.

[Lindsay Fishman]

They're like, with a microchip in my brain, like, don't talk about it.

[Host]

I'm having a strong. The power is that be.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I have a connect.

[Host]

You have a connect? Yes. Okay, so the act. So did you run too when you found out or did you wait a little bit?

[Lindsay Fishman]

I like, tried to digest it for a second. I was like. Because it's like, with anything that's like, of shock value. Like. Let me process this. Yeah, for a second. I also didn't, like, know too much about a lizard God. Like, that's the only thing that I knew.

[Host]

Excuse me. And I'm like, is it that now this is where I'm learning new things in my new life.

[Lindsay Fishman]

They look up to a lizard God and they, like, confess all of their sins to, like, some guy behind, like a curtain. Similar to, like, the wizard of Oz. Yes.

[Host]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Exactly. That's what they do.

[Host]

Wait, the wizard of Oz is about Scientology?

[Lindsay Fishman]

It is.

[Host]

I guess

[Lindsay Fishman]

those like, tick tock people that, like, they do, like, the Mandela effect.

[Host]

Oh, my God. They get me pretty good. I'm pretty impressionable, as people have said. I don't know, some crazy person, but I'm easily swayed or something like that. But yeah, no, they can get me. They can get me pretty good on those conspiracies. What's a conspiracy you believe in?

[Lindsay Fishman]

None.

[Host]

None.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, starting to get really good at it.

[Host]

Okay, that's good.

[Lindsay Fishman]

But then I like, isolate Like, I feel like everything is a conspiracy.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Sometimes I'm like, you know what? Let me think for myself. And I just, like, shut off my phone. I'm like, you guys will not touch me. You guys won't get to me. Nobody will get to me.

[Host]

Wow. You have a good head on your shoulders.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Thanks.

[Host]

I do not. I might even cut this hole.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I am trying to. To just stay afloat right now.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You want.

[Host]

You. You are new to this Jazz.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I am very new.

[Host]

Oh, my go. How. How new are you? Chicken. I just bring chicken. She's a spring chicken, I think I

[Lindsay Fishman]

posted my first tik tok like a year ago today.

[Host]

That's crazy. Yeah, I know. Holy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I don't know what the to do with myself. I'm like constantly. See, I can't even talk about it.

[Host]

No, it's okay.

[Guest/Listener]

You've got this.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I like, play catch up in my head. I'm like, what the is my life? Like, where even am I sometimes? Like, what is going on?

[Host]

Recently a blimp. You're one of like, maybe 100 people have been in a blank.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm going back.

[Host]

What?

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm gonna make them let me back on that blimp.

[Host]

Lollapalooza. Will you be there now? I will.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Okay.

[Host]

I gotta get on that blimp.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's like 16 seeds.

[Announcer]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Everybody's welcome.

[Host]

Yo, dude, I. To be one of 16 would be fucking. I could retire. I just want to go up in a Garbian blimp.

[Commercial Voice 2]

Scary.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Like when you're landing. It, like, doesn't hit the floor. They just like tie it to an anchor like a boat. But like, the sky is like the water.

[Host]

It'

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm gonna break my face.

[Host]

I'm already picturing like a clip. It's like this guy is the water.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Nobody would believe if I went to my hometown. I was like, yeah, I went into a blimp. People would be like, shut the.

[Host]

Yeah. Thank God for the Internet. Look at me.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Blit maxing for the rest of my life.

[Host]

Where are you from?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Cleveland.

[Host]

Hell yeah. I have just recently said, and I say it all the time, people who leave Ohio rock. Thank you. Yes.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's like something about Ohio. Like there is a mentality where we love where we're from for some reason. But we get the out.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And we, like, do something.

[Host]

I love it. I love it. Everyone who's ever left also when I'm there, everyone's so kind and nice.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

And. And some hidden talent.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes.

[Host]

Very good looking people over there. I will Say these, these Ohio guys, they're hiding them away in Cincinnati. It's crazy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Cincinnati.

[Host]

I don't know. I just said a random city of Ohio, but for the most part, yeah,

[Lindsay Fishman]

there are some like good looking people, but they don't go back there. The ones that go back, it's like there, there's a pipeline. Cleveland to like osu. Back to Cleveland. Live in your mom's basement for a little bit.

[Host]

Let me rack my brain for one second. I'm not going to be able to come up with it. I'm trying to think of that. The town that everyone lives in after they graduate college. It's like right to the left of Cleveland.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, Lakewood.

[Host]

Yep.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

Yeah. I was trying to pull that out of my ass. Couldn't find it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Lakewood.

[Host]

That's a pool, though. Thank you. Dude, I know like quite a, quite a good about Ohio. How just, you know, throughout the years.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You're looking up to Ohio. Yeah, like I'm gonna be there one day.

[Host]

Yeah, dude, one day I'm gonna retire. Just like Chappelle. Chappelle has his own little town. What? He grew. Yeah, he, he, he just, he, he, he got so rich and famous. He was like, it, I'm gonna buy the whole town. Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know where I was the other day?

[Host]

Where were you?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Something about LA that I will never be able to comprehend.

[Host]

How long you've been here?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Six months.

[Host]

No, really, where were you before? Chicago. Okay, word.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That is like, that's where I like.

[Host]

I love Chicago.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Me too. I was just there too. It like refuels me. LA is like a very dystopian, like type of place.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

But if you have the right friends, whatever, you, you make it work.

[Host]

You seem like you got a good thing going on here.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Working on it.

[Host]

You can get, you can get. Slippery slope.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, I know.

[Host]

It could be a slippery slop. Easy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

But I just stay home.

[Host]

Except after this. I'm going. We, we specifically made this later in the day so we can go rip some baths after this. Well, you got a blast off. I'm excited. We want to go to this one place that I almost got arrested at. But we'll see. It's gonna, we'll see. It was, it was a toughie.

[Lindsay Fishman]

How'd you almost get arrested?

[Host]

So this whole thing is gonna sound like a big old flex, but you need to remember that I will never get invited to this event again. And I will probably never get invited to hang out with these people again. So I am coming back from the people's choice Awards. I'm wearing my, my, my best gown that I could find last minute. It's. Dude, it's the only getty image I have. It's just me going, my hair is like fucked. It's a whole thing. And I, we. We stopped at Jake Shane's house and he had a bunch of merch. So we put all this merch on and we went out to the after party. The housewives were grilling us and we were like, we don't feel like we should be here. And so then we went to Jameson's where all we're in our. Our octopussy merch, Pussy palace merch. And it was Jake Shane, all of his girly pops, Alex, Earl, me and Brianna. And some guy walked by us and said that we looked a very derogatory word for gay. And I was fuming. And I was also on Shroom, so it was a little late to process. And I waited about 4, 10 to 15 minutes and I went up and I swung on him. I waited. I waited 10 to 15 minutes. I was like, should I do it? Everyone's like, no, I'm like, I'm going to do it. And then finally I was like it. And I went up there and I missed twice. Third time I think I got like a little bit. And he was like, what the. And I was like, you're a piece of shit, man. Wearing my. My merch. It's bad look for him and his company. But then he called the cops on me and.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, kick rocks.

[Host]

And all he wanted was an apology.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, men are divas.

[Host]

Met our divas. That's faced with adversity.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know what? If you weren't on shrooms and his face wasn't melting, you would have, you would have clocked him. Yeah, and then he would have shut the up.

[Host]

He was swaying.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You should find him.

[Host]

I don't want to ever see. I don't. I couldn't even tell you what it looks like.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know how you waited like 10 to 15 minutes to clock the out of him?

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Well, I don't know how long that was, but it's going to be like two years later and I'm going to find him and clock the out of him.

[Host]

It's a delayed reaction. Yeah, dude, he's gonna get what's coming to him one way or another.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know, I'll find him when he least expects it. Yeah, if he's going to. He's probably there every single weekend.

[Host]

I'd say so maybe we can run into him. Yeah, I finally get Some goddamn revenge. I hope not. I think he said his dad's a lawyer. So la.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know what?

[Host]

So la.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Probably A one.

[Host]

Yeah. I mean, his son's a pussy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He's running around asking the cops to say sorry. Yeah, your dad can't do shit.

[Host]

And he. He elongated it. He let me think I was getting arrested. And then the cop was like, all right. He said, if you say sorry, he'll just, like, drop the charges. I was like, what charges? I didn't even know I was being charged.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You didn't even hit.

[Host]

I charged at him and I didn't get him. So. Yeah, we might go to that bar. Let's see if I can get you again. Oh, what about Beachwood?

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's where I'm from.

[Host]

That's where you're from?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes.

[Host]

In Ohio?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes.

[Host]

No. Beachwood. So that's not. That's near Lakewood. No, no, no.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Beachwood is like a cult.

[Host]

There's so many major cities in Ohio, it's crazy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's like, four.

[Host]

Cincinnati, Cleveland, Toledo.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I didn't even notice that, to be honest.

[Host]

Because if.

[Lindsay Fishman]

If you do, like, a little deep dive and you're searching up Ohio. Cleveland is not Ohio. Like, that is the mentality that we all have. Like, Cleveland is not a part of Ohio. Like Columbus, Cincinnati, Dayton, whatever.

[Host]

The.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I don't associate with them. Cleveland, we're basically on, like, that island.

[Host]

Jeff. Jeff. Jeffy's.

[Lindsay Fishman]

So maybe I should take that.

[Host]

Your boy Jay. Me and my boy Jay, we hit Cleveland every once in a while. Ever since they closed the last one. He's still pumping.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Cleveland is its own island, but a good island, I think. I hope.

[Host]

Yeah, everyone. Everyone's always trying to vacation in the tropics of Cleveland.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There is one island, though. I think it's called, like, PE island. And you have to be, like, a member to on it.

[Host]

What?

[Lindsay Fishman]

And, like, people have houses on there. They're like millions of dollars in.

[Host]

In.

[Lindsay Fishman]

O O h, I. Oh, it's like on the border. Sea border? No, lake border of us. Canada.

[Host]

Oh, that's a sweet spot.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, it's a sweet spot.

[Host]

Just in case you got to run.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, just in case.

[Host]

So maybe Jeffy is up there. No. Damn.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's going to come out one day. It's like Jeffrey Epstein, found in Cleveland, hiding in Ariel Castro's old basement. Are you kidding me? Oh, my.

[Host]

Please don't.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Jeffrey Epstein, if you're listening, please don't flee to Ohio.

[Host]

He's a big fan of the show. He writes me lettuce. I Can never. He never has a return address. I've been trying to thank him.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Whenever I hear the term, like he's a. He's a good friend of the show. It immediately triggers me and I just start. I hate the word trigger tail, but it just gets me laughing in hysterics. Like there's a tear in my eye, like somewhere beneath this contact. I love it, dude.

[Host]

It's so funny. You know Adam Ray. So Adam Ray does an impression of Dr. Phil, which is hilarious. And every time he does his show, like if some. If someone says something crazy, he'll go, we'll be right back. As if they're on television. It's like, it's a live show. I'm like, this is. That cracks me up every time. We'll be right back. Like, I have cancer. We'll be all right back.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Wait, where do you watch it? What is it?

[Host]

It's a live show. Is a comic. Oh. Oh, yeah. So you live in person. You can see it on YouTube. Shout out to Adam.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Right back.

[Host]

That's my boy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I get that one from friend of the show, Tim Dylan. Oh, I'm so obsessed with Tim Dillon.

[Host]

He is. Have you met him?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes.

[Host]

Okay.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It was my 2026 goal.

[Host]

It's.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's a dumbass.

[Host]

Just that one thing.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There were two. Two goals for this year was to do stand up at Zany's and to get Tim Dillon to follow me back. And you did double yes.

[Guest/Listener]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know, when I saw Tim Dillon follow me on Instagram, bullet of sweat down my face, tears. Trevor has just left the house. I'm calling him. Come back. Come back. Help. Help. Help. I cannot believe this. I love that guy.

[Host]

Dude, he's out of his goddamn mind. We. We almost had him on this pod, but I think he saw in New York. We have a. It's like a three story walk up like the stairs like this. And I think he. I wasn't doing it. I wasn't doing a hand motion. But he. I think he got there and he was like, yeah, no, he said no one answered the door. We did the same week I sat next to him on a plane and he goes, oh, Jesus Christ. I hadn't slept yet. I was still kind of shroom. And it was like 7:30 in the morning and I was trying to doze off and he kept waking me up going, it's delayed again. I'm like, yeah, I know. Fuck did that fuck.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then at one point respond, it's Tim Dillon. Yeah, I need to snap out of this. Like, yeah, sure.

[Host]

I was just. I was so zoned up. At one point, he yelled back to his friend. He goes, we should have chatted a plane. What the is this? He's pointing at me, sitting next to me. I'm like, dude, this is like purgatory, right?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Though. He's looking at you, he should have chered a plane.

[Host]

Yeah, all of it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You're coming.

[Host]

Yeah, dude. Take me with you, man. He's talking about having a pot roast when he gets home. I'm like, yo, that sounds delish. So that's. That's me, and that's me and T. That's our little. That's our little history.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You should hit him up and be like, yo, can we charter a plane?

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Like, where do you want to go?

[Host]

That's hilarious. To just hit up Tim Dylan and be like, yo, can we charter a plane? I'm trying to go to this weird island in Ohio. So what was your experience?

[Lindsay Fishman]

With who?

[Host]

With T. TD Sometimes I would just

[Lindsay Fishman]

see him, like, in Hollywood. And there's one time it was like, Trevor did a show. It was like, New Year's Eve or some like that. And I was just waiting in the green room. He was there. He was on the show. And people were, like, cracking jokes. Obviously, they don't. They don't know who I am, because I'm not.

[Host]

Not yet.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, Jesus.

[Host]

The power of Christ. Scientology.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think that cough was speaking something into existence.

[Host]

Yeah, that was. That was good.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's, like, when somebody, like, flows like pixie dust. It's like, you're next, dude.

[Host]

Last night, I was saying, I'm getting over something. My sister goes, that's not. You can't. That's. That's gross. Don't tell people you're getting over something. My gosh. Sorry.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm getting over everything. You know what? I realize the second that you. I'm in, like, my terrible twos right now, but of, like, terrible 20s. Like, there are stomach issues that arise in your terrible twos. Like, 27. I'm, like, shitting myself.

[Host]

We're the same age.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Congratulations.

[Host]

Oh, my God. That's so awesome. I thought you were. I thought you were far too young to be my friend.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What?

[Host]

Yeah. I thought you were a little girl.

[Lindsay Fishman]

People think that. You know what? There was a mall cop one time. I was walking through the fucking mall.

[Host]

There always is.

[Lindsay Fishman]

The mall became a little bit ratchet, so they have security everywhere. You can't be in the mall if you're under 18. They come up to me. This was like, A year ago. Can I see your id? And I'm like, what the. Show them my id. I'm like, let me get on my way.

[Host]

I go on my way.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Actually, get the. Out of my way.

[Host]

You just push over.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, right. I was trying to hijack that, actually. I'm trying to go get my new glasses. I'm going to lens crafters. I walk into lens adult. Yeah. I'm putting on these spectacles like you, dude. I. I get into the glasses store, put on my new glasses, walk out. He goes, id. I'm like, do you think I'm a new bitch?

[Host]

Are you joking me? I.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And he's like, oh, sorry. I, like, showed my ID again. He goes, oh, I'm so sorry. You look so different. You look old now. I'm like, you know what? Glasses now. Never again.

[Host]

What the fuck? They wonder why the fucking malls have closed, right?

[Lindsay Fishman]

You guys, little assholes running around in the bathroom.

[Host]

That's why the mall's closing. Nora, my sister Nora, was in a fucking mall shooting. We, as a whole family, we completely slept on it as.

[Lindsay Fishman]

She has just left.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

She's not here to tell us a store. The story I know, of the mall shooting, she survived.

[Host]

I'm gonna have to. I'm gonna have to share it for her. So what happened here was the. A gun went off. I think it was more of, like, the guy, only really was going for one other guy. So it wasn't like, everyone's at risk, but, you know, you got to play it safe.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

So they put everyone. If any store you were in, you went in the back and you were just hiding out. And I think my sister was in a Spencer's. I think she was in the Spencer's closet. So they were just, like, running. They was like, bombs going on. And. Yeah. She called all of us. None of us answered.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Dandy. You're not breaking through, no matter what.

[Host]

She's like, I could have died. I'm like, well, glad he didn't.

[Lindsay Fishman]

So the funniest thing is that she's in a Spencer's. Because, like, nobody's going to a Spencer's unless you're kind of forced to.

[Host]

Yeah. You gotta get a gag gift. Yeah. Or, like, something.

[Lindsay Fishman]

But now she had, like, time to browse.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Luckily, because of the mall shooter.

[Host]

And you take.

[Lindsay Fishman]

She walked out with a dildo that day.

[Host]

Her life is changed for the. For the inconvenience of the day. Like, yeah, this is coming home with me. I'm not paying for this. I almost died. I would, like Some pleasure.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Imagine you like, imagine you try to steal a dildo from Spencer's after a fucking mall shooting. And then the alarms go off. It's like that way.

[Host]

That's me. He throw it. It sticks to someone's head. Oh, dude, we're cooking. Sweating.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Feel like a rotisserie right now.

[Host]

I'm so sorry.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think it's just like I talk a lot.

[Host]

Is there anything? Is talking makes you hot?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, it does.

[Host]

Can. Do you want to slow it down?

[Lindsay Fishman]

No.

[Host]

Okay, perfect. Let's go rapid fire style.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Let's go.

[Commercial Voice 3]

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[Host]

What comes to your mind when I say dogs?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Birthday?

[Host]

Birthday?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Rest in peace.

[Host]

Oh, I'm sorry. You had a dog named Birthday and it died.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I had a dog and it died on my birthday.

[Host]

And is that what you were going for?

[Guest/Listener]

Oh, no, not at all. You were on one of the man on the street like interviews on.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, I don't. With dogs. Anyway, so it's fine.

[Guest/Listener]

And a dog walked by and you go with dogs?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

Okay.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Like that's fine. Well, the thing is, the only thing that pissed me off about my dog is that she was so old, her back legs didn't work. She had like six strokes and then she decided to stroke out on my birthday. And I'm like, you couldn't have waited?

[Host]

Yeah, that's kind of a move.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think that's like the downfall of

[Host]

dogs for me is that they. They croak, they just. Or did they give up?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, they give up. It's like, get a wheelchair. Ada. Ada, put that in. Yeah, my parents used to send my dog to the Barkley Hotel.

[Host]

That's a hilarious name for it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, the Barkley. The Barkley everything's getting crazy names, too. Like, apartment complexes are getting crazy names.

[Host]

What's the name of yours? And your address and your social and your favorite color and your mother's maiden name in the street you grew up on. And your childhood mascot.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I would tell you this. Like, if somebody came up to me on the street, I was like, you know what? Steal my identity. I don't really give a fuck right now.

[Host]

I have been so drunk before, and I have gone up to people and be like, my Social Security is. And I would tell them, and they just walk away. And I think that's classic like that when I'm drunk. Like, it's. Everything's free reign.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You should, like, make up a Social Security number. Go up to so many people that night and just see if anyone tries to, like, go after it.

[Guest/Listener]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Plus, something's happening. I think I'm getting over something crazy right now.

[Host]

Oh. So while you were gone, we were talking about how you were in a shooting. What the. I missed everything. Yeah. So do you want to give your encounter of that or.

[Guest/Listener]

Oh, when I was at the mall.

[Host]

Okay.

[Guest/Listener]

So we were at the mall, and it was during COVID and so you had to wait. You know how, like, American Eagle had Cliff Notes?

[Host]

Yeah.

[Guest/Listener]

I was waiting from Arie to go into American Eagle. Oh, it wasn't Spencer's.

[Host]

No. Oh.

[Guest/Listener]

So I just. So we. And then everyone started sprinting in we're gonna kill.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then they're like, area,

[Guest/Listener]

and they were screaming, get down. And then get down and run. And we were like, what the fuck? I thought people were just stealing. I thought people were, like, ransacking everyone.

[Host]

Get down and run. People got sticky fingers.

[Guest/Listener]

People were ransacking during COVID just going in places because you couldn't see their faces with masks.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I saw this happen.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

In Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

[Guest/Listener]

Crazy.

[Host]

What a good get.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That was crazy.

[Host]

That is crazy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Sorry.

[Guest/Listener]

It's not going fine.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Literally.

[Host]

She's a survivor, dude. Come on. Have so much.

[Guest/Listener]

So then we had to wait in, like, a back room for a while, and then we're, like, checking Twitter to see if everything's clear, and they're like, haven't found suspect.

[Host]

Whatever.

[Lindsay Fishman]

This was reported live on Twitter.

[Guest/Listener]

We came outside of the mall, and there was cops from every single town. Like, every single parking lot was full of just police because they thought it was, like, a mass shooting. It was just like, a boyfriend shooting his girlfriend.

[Host]

It was just.

[Guest/Listener]

No, but it was, like, over a kid, and he missed.

[Host]

Like, he hit the other guy.

[Guest/Listener]

He's like, Shoulder.

[Host]

Oh. Oh, good grief.

[Guest/Listener]

Yeah, it was crazy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Did you steal anything? Did they give you.

[Guest/Listener]

No, didn't feel anything. We should have. We were just in the back of American Eagle so we really could have,

[Lindsay Fishman]

like, a bra or something.

[Host]

Yeah. Yeah, that would have been smart. Yeah. I mean, for the troubles of it all.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Guest/Listener]

But I texted our dad and was, like, in the. No one answered. First of all, my mom and dad. I felt bad, and my dad told me to go to Lord and Taylor and get a gun. I was like, oh, thanks.

[Host]

Yeah, my dad looks in a 90s. I mean, an 80s sitcom. He thinks everything is, like, rodeo. My dad is Peter Griffin. Yeah. Yeah. It's like. It's crazy. It's like, literally to a T. Sounds just like. Like he thinks everything is a movie. A movie. He's still stuck in the 80s. I think he thinks the price of milk is, like, $2 at most. He. Yeah, he's. He's stuck there. I mean, hearing some of his high school. High school stories. I'm like, dad, you're making up.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You should take him to an Air One.

[Host]

He would lose his mind.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That would be hilarious.

[Host]

He would. I think he would, like, stroke out.

[Guest/Listener]

I think you, Gronk, spike the soup.

[Host]

$35, my ass. Yeah. That is the. The most expensive soup at Erewhon. We were checking Yesterday.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Which one?

[Host]

35.

[Guest/Listener]

Buffalo soup.

[Host]

Buffalo.

[Lindsay Fishman]

So what does that even mean?

[Host]

Buffalo chili soup? I don't know. Sure. Yeah. Dude, it's. I don't know how you do it out here.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I threw up in an Air One recently.

[Host]

Oh, really?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, I heard people talking about raw milk.

[Host]

Oh, yeah, it's got that little curd layer.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Well, it has, like, pish. And in it, like, that is what raw milk is. And these girls are like, it's really good for you in your gut. Biome. It has, like, micronutrients. And I'm, like, listening words.

[Host]

I don't know what that is.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And they're like, oh, my God, it's so healthy. That's like, pro. It's like poppy soda, basically. And I'm, like, looking at them. I'm like, oh, my God, that is cow sperm. That is literally piss.

[Host]

And yeah, I was just watching Hacks the other day, and I actually watched them. They were milking goats, and I was like, bro, I forgot where the source is on milk. I like milk. I go in on milk. I kind of stand with milk. Raw milk. Watching the milk come out, I'm kind of, like, pivoting.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You're like, let me just suck on those utters.

[Host]

Squeeze and pull. Squeeze and pull is better.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You find like a pregnant woman. Woman and just like, stuck on the tit. Yeah, I think that that's the same effect.

[Host]

That's a.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's easier to find than a cat

[Host]

saw a video of that. I just.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Not that someone going up to a pregnant woman.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Stacking on her tit.

[Host]

This doesn't sound right.

[Guest/Listener]

You watch some porn?

[Host]

It. That would be a niche category for sure. I mean, I've seen everything. But no, I think it was. What's it. What's the Channel 5 news? That guy. You ever see him? Andrew? Yes, Andrew, the guy with white hair. He just interviewed hakatua and Shia LaBeouf. Oh, you see a Shia LaBeouf interview recently?

[Lindsay Fishman]

No, but I heard people are mad at him. I've been mad at him for years, dude.

[Host]

He did me wrong.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What's he do? What did he do?

[Host]

I don't know personally. He beat the out of me. Yeah. You heard it here first. Shout out. Beat the out of me, bro. I couldn't even see him coming. I was like, shell shocked.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Was this at Jameson's?

[Host]

It was at Jameson's. He was actually target number two.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He should have been.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Dude, that stole my friend's salad, like, 15 years ago.

[Host]

Oh, you really have a relation here?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, my friend grew up here, and it was like one of our first. She was my freshman year roommate.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And she was like. Or I was asking her. I was like, what was it like growing up in LA? She's like, Shia LaBeouf took my salad one time. I was like, yo, that's my salad. And he was like, you walked out with her salad.

[Host]

Wow. He does look like an unhoused guy. Homeless.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Let's just say.

[Host]

Homeless. Let's just say. Also, you just said that the. What. What's it called? The. The. What music video did they film in. In. In a. A neighborhood that someone bought.

[Lindsay Fishman]

When's this coming out?

[Host]

30 days.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I was in a. Hopefully this is okay. I was in an MGK Wiz Khalifa

[Host]

music video representing Ohio.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Literally.

[Host]

Yeah, dude, I know.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Stand 10 toes down on Ohio.

[Host]

Yeah. There's a.

[Lindsay Fishman]

From Pittsburgh.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. Oh, you with ou. I just know all. Everything. Ohio.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, my God.

[Host]

O h, I o. Oh, you want

[Lindsay Fishman]

to learn so much, dude.

[Host]

Town hall. Love that place.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What the.

[Host]

He's a bad guy. He's actually.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He's a horrible guy.

[Host]

He's a bad guy. But I went there before I knew this, and I liked the.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It was a good. Yeah. Funny story. Trevor was like, how do I open up my Cleveland show? And I was like, dude, I get

[Host]

town hall material too.

[Lindsay Fishman]

No way.

[Host]

That's crazy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I was like, talk about this, dude. And he walks out there and I forgot the. The guy's name, but he's like talk of the town, like always. Yeah, Trevor just goes. Whatever his name is. They're like screaming, yeah, dude.

[Host]

They lost their minds. Because the first night I was like, yo, dude, I have so many memories here in Ohio. Like, one time I went to town hall, everyone booed me and I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. The last time I was here, that was a cool place. And they were. It is not. And we will tell you why. And this guy is like a bad guy. He treats his employees really poorly.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He kidnaps women, chokes him out.

[Host]

Bro, I didn't even know that. That's fucking. I wouldn't have just fucking said he treats them poorly. That's a fucking Employ some kind of like. That's. That is.

[Lindsay Fishman]

The food is great. He's up.

[Host]

That's crazy, dude.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Insane.

[Host]

So the rest of the weekend, I was like. I kind of. I started my show kind of like that and I was like, yeah. And I used to go town hall that place. I was like, yeah,

[Lindsay Fishman]

it's like a deep cut skin. They like start to boil. Yeah, because what a. Yeah, dude, exactly. Oh, that's so funny.

[Host]

I'm telling you. I got Ohio law. Got Ohio law. What do we got for when we get to the. When we get to the basics of, like, what. Can I ask you that you know, that's compelling and not just gonna get us in trouble here? Okay. So let's see about this and let's find this. And now. I'm sorry about that. I'm just. We kind of. That's just a hilarious clip of me going out of the. I have no idea what the hell is what the.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm putting paid marketing behind that one.

[Host]

Wait, so you have your degree in brain and behavioral science?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Were you on my LinkedIn? You see my post?

[Guest/Listener]

No.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, my post are pretty good.

[Guest/Listener]

I was on another thing.

[Host]

So you like a LinkedIn creator?

[Lindsay Fishman]

People have been calling me a LinkedIn influencer.

[Host]

That's. There's money in that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

They start putting rules on LinkedIn. Really?

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm going to syndicate the. The out of LinkedIn.

[Host]

Yeah, dude, you got to utilize something that people are not. You are a pioneer.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I love LinkedIn.

[Host]

It's like a. It's like. Yeah, I can't. I can't have an imbd. Because there's apparently an old timey actress that has my name, so.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Is she dead?

[Host]

Yeah, she. Since crooks. So I guess I'm just gonna get up on LinkedIn.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What? Yeah, you should. Yeah, LinkedIn's great.

[Host]

I just. I'll just. I'll tell. I'll tell them everything I've achieved. I got up today, I put these cowgirl boots on. I strapped this on. They want to survive, and that's me right now.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I wake up every day recently. Doing my best is all I can do.

[Host]

That's all you can do.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Existing is all I can do is my best.

[Host]

And you are. You're absolutely crushing it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Having a crazy degree in something I'm not even using. Well, you know, brain and behavior.

[Host]

You got to understand the human brain to tell a joke. True. You have to understand people's behaviors to analyze what works.

[Lindsay Fishman]

True.

[Host]

I think I'm just always like a good way of looking at things, bro. That's what I'm trying to achieve.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I devoted my life to that.

[Host]

Yeah, dog.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Sometimes I want to get back in. I can't get back into that.

[Host]

No, I think it's too late, dude. You don't want that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's been like.

[Host]

You don't want to help people. You can make them laugh. That's a. You'll help them for an hour.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Due.

[Host]

What?

[Lindsay Fishman]

To them for an hour?

[Host]

You could help them for an hour. Oh, by making them laugh?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

It's the best medicine.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I could hope I could help people all day, every single day, if I stayed ON TICK TOCK LIVE 24. 7. I'm a streamer.

[Host]

That. That's. That literally my dream job. I really want people. Please. Dude, I was. We were talking about it yesterday. I was like, imagine how up it would be if you didn't tell somebody that your podcast was live streaming. And then they came on and they're just like shooting. And then it's like, oh, can we cut this? And they tell a secret. And they're like, actually, we were live the whole time.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's like the Coldplay concert.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's a live stream.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I feel like that should have been the downfall of live streaming, but Instead claps just ODing on live stream and they're like, you know what? This.

[Host]

Yeah, dude, that. You know him wish. Dude, I feel like he say some real mean shit to me. Is he. I. He cognitive?

[Lindsay Fishman]

No.

[Host]

No. Oh, really? He's still down?

[Guest/Listener]

No, he's fine.

[Host]

Oh, he's fine. Oh, yeah. No, he's pain in the ass. I don't even. I was trying to figure out what they were taking.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Meth. Yeah, meth. All day, every day.

[Host]

Who's doing. Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He stopped the math when he OD'd at the bar, though, and he had to get revived at the hospital. But I watched the footage. I think he was cliff farming.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, because he was like, you know, sometimes I'm on, like, the, like, Kensington street in Pennsylvania, like, tick tock. And I'm like, I know what OD looks like.

[Host]

Every once in a while I. I find myself at a roadblock there.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah.

[Host]

Observing.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Sometimes I, like, get those interviews of, like, an addict on the street. And I'm like, just listening. I'm like, okay, so I know what an addict looks like.

[Host]

Clav. Yeah, he.

[Lindsay Fishman]

He might be on a little bit

[Host]

of math, but, like, you can't be doing math. Like, you can't. Like, it's just like, not like a low key thing you'd be doing.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, my God. Wait, can I tell you something?

[Host]

Yeah, of course.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There is this tick tock of you

[Host]

little giggle felt.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I've been talking about this, like, probably since I found you on the Internet. Something I watch, oh, frequently is your tick tock that you made with Jojo

[Host]

Siwa in the park, brother.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's like you, like, lost the dance move for a second, but then you stand on business at the end and you just, like, come back.

[Host]

Because she was so deadass. Like, dude. Like, I was like, oh, we'll make a. We'll make a video. Like, she'll teach me how to dance. Like, it's like, whatever. And she, like. I thought, like, we, like, weren't in the park, she'd be like, shooting the. But she's all Jojo all the time.

[Lindsay Fishman]

No way.

[Host]

She is. That is what you see is what you get, which I respect. But I did think that there was two sides of the curtain. Kind of like Scientology. Jojo.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Jojo's a new cult.

[Host]

Jojo. I can't say that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Well, she's like her own call. Her, like, entire bit is like, her. Her car is wrapped.

[Host]

Her car is wrapped. She's got toys galore. I mean, she's got to be swimming in it if her parents didn't steal the money.

[Guest/Listener]

She's straight now.

[Host]

She's straight now.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, she is straight now.

[Host]

But she's like, she ain't straight. Like, she ain't straight with me, but

[Guest/Listener]

neither is he. We should probably cut that.

[Host]

No, it. Dude, I'm so sick of being worried about what to cut this Is the trip. I'm here in LA to get cancelled. Straight up. We have been playing it way too cool, way too easy, way too much. We cut so much. I'm so done. Like, you know, you know what cutting does and.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And not circumcises the out of you. Yeah, that anti circumcise right now.

[Host]

Yeah. What the wrong with it? Oh, I just got word that we're at an hour. Thank you so much, Nora. She just flipped the computer was like,

[Lindsay Fishman]

shut the up about JoJo Siwa right now. Your career is over.

[Host]

Yeah, right. When I talk about wanting to get canceled. Well, time's up. Believe all women. Okay. No, it's time. We've been too. We've been too good. We've been too particular. And it doesn't really do good for the numbies, bro. Thank you so much for being on my canceled pod, which actually was a podcast at one point.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, I'm on the Reddit there for that.

[Host]

You're with them.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You know what I want. That's another person. You can't.

[Host]

Come on.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You on that Reddit.

[Host]

You reading that?

[Lindsay Fishman]

I started going on Reddit once. I think it was looking up like war footage. War. And now it's like taking my data, taking my cookies. And it's like, here's tea about the canceled podcast. Here's tea about the secret lives of Mormon wives. And I'm like, how did I get here?

[Host]

I am. I am hooked.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Suddenly I'm. I am locked in somehow. Somehow some way, like I'm supposed to be here on Reddit.

[Host]

You ever look up your own name?

[Lindsay Fishman]

No, don't. No, I don't think.

[Host]

Not you personally, but I just like, that's like, it's.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I don't think anyone gives enough of a about me.

[Host]

I do.

[Lindsay Fishman]

To put me. Well, just don't.

[Host]

And thousands of others. And also, you are pretty girl. You are pretty girl.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Thank you.

[Host]

And so pretty girl. You have a lot of male followers.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Unfortunately, there's actually. It's not Reddit where people are talking about me. It's just like deep cut app that is used for drug dealing where I'm in a group chat or my stuff is in a group chat where people are like putting their dicks, jerking off to my face.

[Host]

What is this? Oh, only fans. No drugs on. Only fans.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There is like a deep cut dark web app where people sell drugs on it, but they also make group chats to do like, weird signal. Oh, is that what it is?

[Host]

Signal? And then there's WhatsApp.

[Lindsay Fishman]

No, no, it's not WhatsApp.

[Guest/Listener]

I literally just texted my friends, what's that app that you guys use for weed?

[Host]

For weed?

[Guest/Listener]

They used to talk on that to get their dealers.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's legal, unencrypted or something like that.

[Host]

Forget.

[Guest/Listener]

No, I know, but they were like dealing well in West Virginia. Was it?

[Host]

Oh, now we're talking something different. We're talking to the Boda.

[Lindsay Fishman]

People are taking my talk to the camera videos and jerking off to them and like stitching it on there somehow.

[Host]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Telegram.

[Host]

Telegram, yes. Telegram, yes. Okay. I think I'm Signal was the app that the. The politicians got in trouble on, I think. Yeah, but it's just meant for drug dealers.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I don't know. The one with the big boobs.

[Host]

Big boobs.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Big boobs.

[Host]

Dude, it's so funny cuz she's so anti gay. I mean, you clown ass.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I've been cackling about Christina for so

[Host]

long, dude, that dude, her video would play every day at the airport.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What? I didn't even know who she was until her husband came out as boobs.

[Host]

She's rattling off all her terrible opinions and he's in the house going,

[Lindsay Fishman]

I've got an opinion for you. What do you think about these nipples?

[Host]

My wife's the. I'm so glad I could be free in America. America.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Free the nip. What's his name?

[Host]

Jim Charles.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Politicians take notes.

[Host]

Politicians take notes on him. This is a very political pond. Sure, it can be. If we want numbers to go up K. Tim Dylan. Yeah, I'll pull Tim Dylan. I'm gonna do my best. Tim Dillon,

[Lindsay Fishman]

friend of the show.

[Host]

Friend of the show here. Tim Dillon. I don't know what the everyone's talking about. That was awful. I hated myself.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It was actually pretty good.

[Host]

Excuse me.

[Lindsay Fishman]

If you put a desk in front of you and you put your hands on it and said that exact same thing, people be like, oh my God.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What's he talking about?

[Host]

Yeah, that's what the glasses are called. Pfeiffer, fifas. Vipers. Vipers. Vipers, Vipers. Fif. Yeah. I don't want to get in a heated debate about this, but. Oh, here we go.

[Guest/Listener]

You guys are matching.

[Host]

Here we. Oh my God.

[Guest/Listener]

Identically matching.

[Host]

Well, hers are probably real class. Are yours real class?

[Lindsay Fishman]

I have no idea because I got

[Host]

these from Jeff himself. Epstein Bezos. Look at us. Same thing, different shade of your glass.

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[Host]

So the fun part of this show is Nora's really good at, like we said, and we've seen grabbing a deep cut from your life. So let's go down memory lane. We have some. We have some digital footprint here. Oh, yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Hopefully it's like me putting the gay pride flag over my selfie on my sixth VSCO account.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. No, yeah, of course. Damn it. What's that?

[Guest/Listener]

I should start using this.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I like.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. It's really good. That's. That's good. You gotta check.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm annotating every day. You're a really smart girl, Lindsay.

[Host]

So this. This one says it's really speaking your praises. Actually, it's. It's not something you've posted. It's someone. It's something that someone has posted about you. Have you ever seen this about yourself? I'd like you to read that out loud for us, please.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think I wrote this about myself. You Crazy Birds by Lindsay Fishman is the coolest. 5 stars, top tier on Greek Rank. Lindsay Fishman is the coolest Pie fi. She is so popular. 5 out of 5 on the popularity, everyone get to know her. This ranking is only about her. I don't even know her, though. This was me.

[Host]

That was you? That was you. That's perfect. I. I love that. Because you also got kicked out of sorority, so just so you know. Wait, so we never really got into that. So you hacked the account of the sorority because they were being racist?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes.

[Host]

And so what did you do on the account?

[Lindsay Fishman]

I posted stuff for Black Lives Matter.

[Host]

Perfect.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then I went to the DMs and I saw DMs between, like, the president and the VP of recruitment. And they were like, we only wanted skinny blonde hair, blue eyes. They did like, parentheses, Aryan Race Nurses 4.0. The thing is, the House that I was in and like, all that cold. But the older girls were cool. We were called PI Beta Fight Club. This clocked someone like they were alcoholics doing crazy on the roof. They got put on probation.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Then that narc class came in and they're like, Aryan race only. So I expose those messages. Oh, I'm so also somebody on the. Gladly. I have a platform to talk about this. Someone on the floor. It has been my life mission to figure out who the it was. They posted a picture of me recently. TBT to 2017 or whatever. Like 2016. Whatever era I comment. Who the on the floor? Delete this and figure it the out. I'm hiring a PI.

[Host]

Oh, my God.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's a T on that.

[Host]

No, that is T. So. And here's the other thing. They kick you out because, oh, God forbid you're not racist. God forbid you expose them for being racist. God forbid you wicked smile to be hacking.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Thank you.

[Host]

And. And God forbid you find. You know, you gotta. You got. You. You're in music videos and. And now they want to rep you.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Right. I was trying to help out.

[Host]

That's like my high school, my fucking middle school bully asking to come to my show. I said, I don't think there's any tickets. I don't think there's any tickets left, girl.

[Lindsay Fishman]

My high school bully just liked my Instagram post. Post for the first time.

[Host]

Dude, I saw you. Hilarious. Dude. That is, like.

[Lindsay Fishman]

So she's been liking all that too, but it's, like, very sad.

[Host]

Do you think she knows that she's the bully when she sees a video of you saying your high school bully liked.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yes.

[Host]

Yeah, she should.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, she should. She's like, guilt trip now. Like, I post about it and she's like, oh, my God, I have to like everything. And she is. I won't shout her out, but no, I'm not gonna.

[Host]

I'm not gonna shut mine out. We actually, I think we're. I'm. I'm personally over. It's been too long. It's time to get over it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm not over it. I'll never be over. I'm still in my, like, story, like, swiping up, like, did you see it yet? Are you liking it yet?

[Host]

It's not. She's not looking for the. She's looking for the bully gays. I am not gay bullies. That's a different thing. Bully gays.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I think the most threatening human beings are a girl that doesn't have many friends except for a gay best Friend. They are a dynamic duo and it's vicious.

[Host]

Well, it's them against the world. So it literally sense. I'm a little jealous.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm just waiting for Cartoon Network to make a series about a girl and her gay best friend. That's network. Yes, yes. It's like Ed and Eddie, but like modern day times.

[Host]

Oh yeah. They were all gay. They were a polycool.

[Guest/Listener]

Duh.

[Host]

I think. Yeah.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then monster. What was it called? Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. That too.

[Host]

That, that.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That's about fantasy.

[Host]

Cartoon Network scared me, actually. I was kind of a. In that sense.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Cat dog freaked me the out.

[Host]

Yo dude. Curse the cowardly dog.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh my God.

[Host]

In my psychology class they said you need actually crazy this. The assignment was diagnose a cartoon or a character in a movie or a show. Which is crazy because it's like you can't just diagnose people.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You can't just tell somebody what they are.

[Host]

Yeah, but curse the Carolyn dog was schizophrenic. That's a 100 bastard. That was nuts.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That was a crazy show.

[Host]

That was a crazy show. Yeah, I didn't like it.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And E.T. oh my God.

[Host]

E.T.

[Lindsay Fishman]

makes me crawl my skin.

[Host]

E.T.

[Lindsay Fishman]

especially like the scene where he's like dead on the bed.

[Host]

Why does he look like a penis? He.

[Lindsay Fishman]

And to me, like I didn't even know what a penis was when I first saw that. And I was like, that dude's a raisin.

[Host]

I just thought of that just now.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, daddy's a penis.

[Host]

I've never thought of him as a penis ever in my life until just now.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Turtleneck or no turtleneck?

[Host]

I don't know. I haven't seen money. Does it get cold?

[Guest/Listener]

Penis.

[Host]

Why is he. Oh, that's a giant.

[Guest/Listener]

Why don't I have a penis?

[Host]

Let's see here.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh my God, I love this one. I was so Tumblr. Do you know the story behind this one is my friend had multiple friends, but very cool. She was very cool. She is very cool. She was in music and like film and this, that and the other. She had these like 25 year old friends. This is me when I'm 16 years old. They're like, we're gonna take pictures. Photo shoot. Playhouse Square, Cleveland, Ohio. I scaled a building, climbed up a ladder on the back of it, jumped in between two buildings, wasn't wearing pants. Okay. In my oversized Adidas shirt just for that. And then they started asking me if I liked anal. Why do people.

[Host]

Yeah. Why do we have to ruin Such a beautiful moment.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah, I know, but you know what? I have that. And like that's, that's peak.

[Host]

And so they asked you right when they took it and you're just thinking about it like, what?

[Lindsay Fishman]

And then I'm like, I wonder what.

[Host]

They're like.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, I'm gonna jump. That building was like 16 stories high.

[Host]

64 high.

[Lindsay Fishman]

16, probably.

[Host]

16. That's.

[Lindsay Fishman]

There's nothing too big in Cleveland, Ohio.

[Host]

Well, I was just, I was just in Kentucky. I was just telling my sister the story. I was in Kentucky. I was talking to this like cute little couple. They're getting married soon. They're super young, but that's how they do it down there. And the kid, we're in a hotel. It's like a five story hotel. He goes, I never been in a building with this many stories before. I said, what the fuck are you talking about? He goes, this is the biggest. I've only been up like I'd say maybe two floors at most.

[Lindsay Fishman]

What? Yeah, it's flat basement going down. I wonder if. Are they pale in Kentucky,

[Host]

you know? Oh, well, they're pretty. They're white as.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Sick of white people. I hate them.

[Host]

Gets a little scary. Gets a little hickey. Oh, is this. Is this Titanic? What's happening here?

[Lindsay Fishman]

That is actually my friend that Tony took me on the adventure to the roof of that building with the pedophiles. That was me in high school. Model United nations at Michigan State University, about to debate from the perspective of North Korea.

[Host]

Oh yeah, of course.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Have you ever seen footage, if you ever see footage of me being like, I don't support gay people, it's because I was cosplaying North Korea in model United Nations.

[Host]

Really good to get in front of that. That is like really good. Maybe one more time right into your camera just so that you know, you can get ahead of that because you know you have a very long and beautiful career ahead of you and I just would hate to see you go down for North Korea, you know, if

[Lindsay Fishman]

anyone ever sees footage of me saying I don't support the gays. I was cosplaying as North Korea at the age ripe Age of 16 years old at a multi United nations conference in Michigan.

[Host]

Thank you so much for speaking.

[Lindsay Fishman]

It's not me.

[Guest/Listener]

I support them.

[Lindsay Fishman]

If you pulled up the Fisco me and the pride flag, I swear to God.

[Host]

All right, now this has got to be the dead dog, right?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Rest in peace. We were cosplaying her as a VSCO

[Host]

girl and I also, I Quickly forgot that story. And so I thought the dog's name was still birthday.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Birthday recipe's birthday.

[Host]

Oh, she's a little crazy.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, I'm just so crazy. So quirky.

[Host]

I definitely like having a blast drinking in the park or something.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That was like the only time my dad let me out of the house in high school.

[Host]

Like, we're out and we're out. I think.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I swear I'm alive.

[Host]

And then you send him this and he says, you found it. My sister.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, this is your sister?

[Host]

That's my.

[Lindsay Fishman]

No, no, that's me. Okay. But that's my sister's favorite picture of me. Me. Oh, probably cuz I'm like lowkey cockeyed in it.

[Host]

Oh my God. So how many siblings you got?

[Lindsay Fishman]

One.

[Host]

One. Just you and your sis?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Yeah. You guys get along?

[Host]

You. So what happened?

[Lindsay Fishman]

She's like mad at me right now.

[Host]

What the. Her deal?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Getting a restraining order against my dad. She's like, don't do it.

[Host]

Oh.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I'm like, girl, get out the house.

[Host]

Yeah, dude, it's slippery slob. Sorry for your troubles.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Don't worry about it. I'm getting over it.

[Host]

We're all getting over something.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Oh, my. That's me and my friend who introduced me to the pedophiles again.

[Host]

Wow.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I had see their Max Frost or Captain Kid, a local Cleveland band, but I would stroke out their concerts. That's like Loki. I was like a pedophile then. I shouldn't say that, but I was like, please notice me. Like you guys are in college. Like, you're so cool, like all papa titty. And I was. That was like the most unmodest I ever was in high school.

[Host]

And it's probably good they never noticed you, you know, because

[Lindsay Fishman]

they're no longer a band anyways.

[Host]

Oh, they split up.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Up.

[Host]

Yeah. I hate to see the boys go their separate ways.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I know.

[Host]

What happened to the music?

[Lindsay Fishman]

Music is dead.

[Host]

And then we're gonna end on this beautiful collage.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Wonderful. Yeah, I think I like snuck out of the house at like 6 in the morning so me and my friend could have a photo shoot. Really, really cool vibes in Cleveland, Ohio.

[Host]

That is. That is something really special.

[Lindsay Fishman]

I was like, I'm finding God. Staring at the sky.

[Host]

One day. One day I'll be in LA and I'll find someone. They'll find me. And then just then I'll have an ADA hotel room. And we've came absolutely full circle on this one. Lindsay, let's go drink some beers. Please, please, for the love Of God.

[Lindsay Fishman]

So many beers.

[Host]

To end this little pod podcast, I'd like you to look into this camera one more time and just give a shout out to anybody, rapid fire style. I'll go first to give you an example. Shout out to in Winters. Is that a person?

[Guest/Listener]

And Winters.

[Host]

I don't know. Shout out Ann Winters. Shout out Mary. Go rounds. The ones that go around and around, but the ones who have the little hoops that you can grab the little hoops so you win the. The golden hoop where you can ride the ride again. Shout out to the beach. I love the beach. Shut out. Merry Christmas. I just want to say Merry Christmas to you guys and also all the other holidays you may celebrate. And shout out to the digital camera I'm looking right into. I love you so much. Thank you so much for getting every. Hey. Angle you can. That was piss poor.

[Lindsay Fishman]

That was good.

[Host]

I set you up for a win.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Shout out to my urethra. That's very tiny, according to my gyno. Shout out to raisins, but not ET and shout out to the restraining order on May 26th.

[Host]

Coming soon.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Coming soon.

[Host]

Fuck you, Lindsey's dad. All right. And where can these motherfuckers find you? You at? Oh, at the park.

[Lindsay Fishman]

At the park at the Parker on the Island. Actually, don't. No, no, no, no.

[Host]

You can find me 18 stories up on a slide in Cleveland.

[Lindsay Fishman]

You can find me at Spencer's. Hopefully I'm not out at gunpoint, not stealing anything. You can find me Lindsay. L I N D S E Y Fishman F I S H M A N On all platforms, especially LinkedIn, like Subscribe.

[Host]

Thank you and thank you, Lindsay.

[Lindsay Fishman]

Thank you.

[Host]

Let's go get some bees. Let's go. Let's go, please.

[Commercial Voice 3]

It's the Smucker's Uncrustables podcast with your host, Uncrustables.

[Host]

Okay, today's guest is rough around the edges. Please welcome crust.

[Commercial Voice 3]

Thanks for having me.

[Host]

Today's topic. He's round with soft pillowy bread. Hey. Filled with delicious PB and J.

[Commercial Voice 3]

Are you talking about yourself?

[Host]

And you can take them anywhere. Why'd you invite. And we are out of time.

[Commercial Voice 3]

Are you really cutting me off?

[Host]

Uncrustables are the best part of the sandwich. Sorry. Crust.

[Commercial Voice 2]

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[Announcer]

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[Host]

Stop.

[Commercial Voice 3]

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[Host]

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[Announcer]

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[Host]

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[Commercial Voice 3]

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[Lindsay Fishman]

Tennessee 2012.