
Yvette Segan is here and she's ready to answer the questions on everyones mind! Was the moon landing faked? Are straight men really "straight"? Should we be climbing Mt. Everest? What's the deal with British slang? What's the difference between just dating and OFFICIALLY dating? Grace and Yvette also connect over being surrounded by male comics and... smoking tampons??? Have a day, much love & enjoy the show! Leave us a voicemail here: speakpipe.com/disgraceful Get tour tickets here: https://laylo.com/laylo-gomalley/m/ggetthemtix https://www.graceomalleycomedy.com/ Follow Yvette: https://www.instagram.com/yvettesegan/?hl=en https://www.yvettesegan.com/ https://www.tiktok.com/@yevit?lang=en
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A
I believe that American idol can change my life for the better. ABC Monday American idol is back.
B
Why are you so emotional? I didn't think I'd ever get to.
A
Be somewhere like this. Where your vote turns dreamers. You ready for it? You're going to Hollywood, meet into idols There it is the golden ticket. You are inspiring.
B
You're pretty incredible.
A
American Idol season premiere Monday 8, 7 Central on ABC and stream on hulu Gas snacks tolls.
B
This trip is draining my wallet. Yeah, but we'll be with family.
C
You're in a good mood.
A
What's your deal?
B
What's my deal? I saved at Metro with no activation fees and I got one line of 5G for just $25 per month. Kept the phone I love and a 5 year price guarantee on my top text and data detour to metro.
A
Get that more for your money feeling.
B
Only at Metro by T mobile.
A
Just bring your number.
B
$30 first month and $25 after with autopay not available. If with metro or T mobile in the past 180 days, there was this.
A
Game we would play in middle school called zap. And someone would write a time on the top of your hand and then a name on your palm.
B
Oh, yeah.
A
And if you looked at the name on your palm before the time you had to go ask that person out. And so every time I got asked out since I was a child was a zap.
B
I spilled water on myself. I'm just dripping.
A
Are you wet?
B
No, it dried. It dried, but I am wet.
A
Hey, welcome on to just. Am I right, ladies?
B
Oh, yeah. Girls, we're getting wet on the pod today.
A
That's a good way to start, don't you think?
B
Yeah.
A
Now, I say your name one way and I think I say it wrong. Okay, say it.
B
Say it.
A
Say it. I say, if I were in casual conversation without thinking about it too much, I would say yvette.
B
That's my name.
A
Okay. Cause on paper, Yvette.
B
Wrong.
A
Wrong.
B
O deeply wrong.
A
Does anyone say that? No.
B
Almost nobody has said that.
A
The why is obviously silent to everyone, but. Yeah, but me, when I'm overthinking it.
B
You go, but there is a why, right? Like you're all seeing the why.
A
Why. Is there why?
B
Exactly. And no, no, but thank you.
A
Okay, so. And then like say se again, okay? Because I'm thinking of Tyler Sagan who was a hockey player on the Bruins and I'm not like crazy sports. But when I. Yeah, I want to say Sagan, but it's Segan.
B
Frankly, my. My name is a Nightmare. Because it looks like you should be able to say it and then no one can say it. Do you know what I mean? It's not like there's, like, so many letters.
A
Yeah, that's true.
B
It's like, oh, this is probably a name that we can all pronounce. And. And then, like, no one can say my first or last name. I think my first name has a Y in it and is still easier somehow to pronounce than my last name because people don't know what to emphasize in the E or the ah.
A
It's the emphasis there.
B
Yeah. They're like, is it Segan? Is it Segan? Is it Segan? Yeah, but it's Se, Gan, which is equal emphasis on both, which is Sean. Yeah, but really it's a fake name because of Ellis Island.
A
What was the original Sigen?
B
T, Z, I, G, E, N. Which I'm like, that's kind of cool. Cooler.
A
That is cool. But it's like these. Dude, it's like these. These letters that don't. You don't need.
B
I didn't invent Eastern Europe.
A
No, I know, I know. I'm just saying.
B
I just, like.
A
So it would have been with a T that you don't pronounce. Oh, T.Z.
B
Yeah.
A
Like Taziki.
B
Like tzatziki.
A
Yeah, straight up.
B
Am I holding? Is this right?
A
You can do whatever the hell you want with it. If you feel more comfortable holding it, then become a pop star. When's. When's the last time you bombed on stage? Yeah.
B
Oh, God, I don't know.
A
I just. I tried to find a do pivot.
B
No, I know.
A
Sorry.
B
No, the last time I bombed, like, I. I consider a lot to be a bomb because I hate myself. I, like, I'll get laughs, like. And I'll be like, well, that was the worst show I've ever done, you know, like. Because if I'm like the.
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The.
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If the crowd, I'm like, they like me, but they don't love me. I'm like, well, I bombed.
A
That's so Liza Minnelli.
B
Why they gotta.
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I don't want them to just like me. They gotta love me. Have you watched the. This is. My brain's going absolute rapid fire style loving. Watch the dance competition for the colleges. It's every year, everyone goes nuts. Well, because they did Eliza Minnelli song, and that's where my brain went. If you want to hear my thought process, you don't have a microphone. Shut up. Stop talking. And my sister in the back going, oh, what are you talking about you're going too nuts? Oh, actually, I love that. I'm just kidding. Or. Oh, okay. You looked away. Okay.
B
Sisters who fight.
A
Let's go. So what people don't know sometimes is that we are siblings. And so when we fight in, like, a green room, they're like, oh, my God. Oh, they. This is a really weird way that she treats the people she works with.
B
Right? And it's like, that's my sister. I can say whatever the I want.
A
Always introduce. This is my sister Nora.
B
It's my sister Nora. She's a.
A
You get it? You get it. This is just how it goes.
B
It's okay. I can say that.
A
She's my sister. Do you. Do you have siblings?
B
I do, yeah.
A
Are you tight with them? No. No, man.
B
Them.
A
Yeah, off the Instagram.
B
Scraped him from my Insta. Yeah.
A
I couldn't. I thought you were an only child.
B
No, I know. I basically am. Like. I don't know. I feel like people have mistaken me for an only child, which is insulting. But I. Yeah, that is pretty. I think it's because I'm, like, the youngest girl, and my parents really love me, so I have a little bit.
A
Of a princess thing. Yeah, no, it's princess. And it's also your obviously, the favorite youngest girl.
B
Youngest girl.
A
That's just, like. That's just statistics.
B
You got to be protected. Now, I always thought that he was the favorite, but I think he thinks that I'm the favorite. So then maybe my parents actually just did a good job.
A
Yeah, no, that's. That's great. Yeah. But that. That adds the competition and the family.
B
Oh, totally. And we were, like, close in eight. We are still. He's alive.
A
We were. He's killed off in your story.
B
He's dead to me. No. Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, we're just not close, but, like, he. Yeah, we're close in age, so we definitely had that, like, competitive edge growing up.
A
Yeah. 100.
B
Yeah.
A
So you went to. I did. I did my research. You went to Vassar. I did go to Vassar College, which is in Poughkeepsie.
B
Poughkeepsie.
A
Well, I, like, say Poughkeepsie. My friend Joey. Shout out Joey. But Poughkeepsie. I'll always say it because it's so fun to say, even though I say it wrong, you know? Poughkeepsie.
B
Poughkeepsie.
A
Pick it.
B
Poughkeepsie.
A
I went to school in Poughkeepsie.
B
Yeah, exactly. Studied theater.
A
Yeah. So you have a. A degree in what's drama? Yeah. Yes. And then you go, oh, and then you. And then you went overseas.
B
I did.
A
And you did a little London thing, didn't you? I did a London ting. You have a little London thing, ain't you? You know what I love about London?
B
I mean, it's a great place. I love that place. They have the craziest slang, like. Like for vagina.
A
Those are my favorite. Those are two snapper. Oh, close a squeeze bag. Do you want to also close a teacup? So a mug. What could it be?
B
Okay, I'm gonna give you.
A
Going to go, huh? Ready?
B
Clunge.
A
I don't. Yeah.
B
Other one second one minge.
A
I. I hate minj. Remember everyone was saying with Minj recently.
B
On, like, Tik Tok, squeeze my legs together, like, in a bad way. I was just like, protect yourself.
A
Clung and min.
B
You can feel that those are things.
A
Grabbing. Talk about onomatopoeia. Jesus Christ, have mercy. So you ever be hooking up with a London guy, he's like, I love your Minj. Oh, gross. I love your pussy is the translation. So that's kind of gross, too.
B
But I think it's like, yeah, girl.
A
I love that pussy. What a tight. Like, you're not Minj.
B
What a tight Clunge. No, I think it's like clung. I think both of those words you use, like, derogatory. It's like, not like, I'm into. Oh, like stinky Munch. Yeah.
A
I combined the two to make it work.
B
We need the wrist to chime in on this. Munch is the new one.
A
Fuck.
B
I see, like, tears are coming out.
A
I see it. She's just thinking so fondly of her London munch times Minj. Minj. What is it? Minj and clunge. Clunge is. Clunge has got to be the worst one.
B
I think so bad. I don't even think that they really say it that much. It's just, like, one thing that I've.
A
Heard, but they were really saying it at you while you were there. That was my new face. I got two some people. Oh, my little crumpet. You're. Yeah, you're a bit of a minj, aren't you? It's like, I'm gonna say that instead of, like, you, dude, just being such a. I'm like, oh, you're being such a clunge. Clunge. Oh. So besides the slang. Yeah. Time over across the pond. It's really fun. I studied. I studied a little munch.
B
I studied mange and crunch. Spin.
A
No, I. I studied acting.
B
Did I Cry. My makeup all the way up.
A
No, girl, you're totally fine.
B
I'm sobbing right now.
A
I'm glad we're having fun enough to cry, dude.
B
I love. I love to have fun and cry until we cry. I love to have fun to the point of cry.
A
Are you usually. Are you a cry laughter. Because those are my favorite people of all time, dude.
B
I cry every time I. Yeah, I also cry so much in general, but, like, at movies, and I laugh until I cry, as evidenced by this moment.
A
I love that. That's a beautif.
B
Thank you.
A
That's like a really awesome, like, person to be around is when you're laughing so hard you cry.
B
Yeah, I can't breathe. Do you cry when you laugh?
A
I. I hope to, yeah, one day. No, I like, I just. It happens rarely, but when it does. Oh, God, that's so good. That's a blast off moment, man.
B
Oh, my God.
A
God. There's nothing better. I mean, an emotion where you're supposed to be sad and. Or an action where you're supposed to be sad and you're. You're laughing. Yeah, we've tricked the brain. We've hit. We've hit blast off zone. Yeah, that's huge.
B
There's. Yeah. Once I hit a certain threshold, just, like, emotion in any direction, I will be both laughing and crying.
A
Yeah, it's. It's a beautiful thing. I think that's.
B
That's life itself, really.
A
Now, what is something that you've been dying to get off your mind for. For a while now.
B
Off my mind? Like off my chest?
A
No, get off your mind. The chest thing doesn't even make any sense. If we're going to be honest, we should start saying things right, even if we're saying it wrong.
B
M. Get it off the top of your head.
A
Get it off your mind in the bottom of your clunge. Release it from your clunch. What has been on you.
B
A clench is like a possessed vagina. You know what I mean?
A
It's literally the thing in Stranger Things. Yeah, that's what I'm picturing. That's a glitch that's also a little stolen. I watched SNL this week.
B
Oh.
A
And they said that. Yeah. They also had a skit where we were talking on your podcast of how we're like, we get along with guys very well. And they did a whole Pick me. Yeah, they did.
B
I mean, we get along with guys. Yeah, we actually, like, really get along with guys.
A
So there's no way to say it. That doesn't sound like, exactly. The skit they made this week. I don't know if you saw it. It was Veronica, and she was over for Guys Guys day. They're all watching football.
B
Yeah.
A
And she comes over. She's like, don't worry. I'm just, like, one of the guys. She's like, in everyone's face, like, shotgunning. And I was like, that's me. That's me.
B
I said, the comedy. Hang us at the stand.
A
Comedy club.
B
Hanging with the guy.
A
What's up, bro? Ball tap.
B
Get, like, the games on, and they're hot. Boxing, the green room. And we're just like, yeah, same.
A
You can watch it on my tits. Watch it right there. Get me a hit of that.
B
I've never smoked.
A
I'm like, yeah, I love the game. Are you guys going outside to smoke cigarettes? I think I keep some in my bag just in case this happens. You want Lucy? Here you go.
B
It's crumble. It's a tampon. A Lucy tampon.
A
It's like. It's. I think I got something for this.
B
Yeah. That's what it's like being a female comedian.
A
Yeah.
B
No, Yeah. I think we both. We both know how to hold our own in a male environment.
A
I think so.
B
You know, it's fine.
A
It didn't. And with that being said, your podcast, Friend Crush, did you start that because you had a crush on someone and you just wanted to get them in a room? Yep.
B
Okay.
A
Because that. That would be my. That would. That. I mean, when I saw that, I'm like, that's gold. That's. That's absolutely playing the long game. Yeah.
B
And guess what? We still haven't had him on. Or she.
A
Or her. And. Or no, no, she's all of a sudden by.
B
No, I'm not by. Or gay. But I. No. Yeah. I though I. I. I like friend crush because it was like a. It was a term growing up that we used at my All. Okay, this is gonna maybe make me sound gay.
A
No, no, no, it's okay. You might be.
B
We all might be. Really.
A
I mean, my jury has been out my whole life, and.
B
And we all have. And I think. And I think a lot more guys are like, all. You know how all women are bi?
A
Yeah, I would say so.
B
Yeah. All guys are bi. Too.
A
Elaborate.
B
Then I think a lot more guys know that their bi will never say anything or have had, like, openly gay experiences and then just don't talk about it. And so we just don't know. Whereas, like, girls do the opposite. We go, I've had A gay thought once I'm bi.
A
Yeah, I know. Yeah.
B
And then the girl and not to. And you are by girl boss. And I'm not saying you're not.
A
Stand your ground.
B
I'm just saying the boys are also bi because they've all like, done way gayer than we have.
A
Yeah. You start hearing these guys on podcasts, right? And they're sharing stories of when they were younger.
B
Yeah. And they're like, when I was jerking off at 13 sitting next to my boys, Tommy and Jeff. It's like. Wait. I'm just saying that the statistics behind, like, how many gay, like, bi women there are, you know for a fact, like, human biology means that there is an equal and opposite straight. Like this guy. There are more guys who are Biden than.
A
No, you. You completely swayed me. Okay. Yeah, you got me there. Yeah. No, I am wicked easy. Oh. Someone could say just something with like a little bit of base to it, and I'm like, yeah, no, you're right. Okay. 911 was fake. Like, I just. They make. Like anyone could like, present a case to me and I'm just like, yeah, that's. That's true. And I can't believe I thought otherwise. Like, in eighth grade, they ran out of science to teach us, and so they were like, yeah, here's conspiracies. What? Yeah. Have I talked about this on here? Oh, so in your what?
B
In public school, it was.
A
I don't know if it was my science class or my literature class, but they were like conspiracies. But the science teacher. Oh, it was. It was like a rotating English that. And the science teacher was teaching this. It was weird public schools. So this is Boston suburbs. Yeah, Boston. Yeah. And yeah. Just one day they were like, yeah, the moon landing wasn't real. Watch this video.
B
They said that as fact.
A
Well, they just said it as kind of like a question. Everything. I think this guy had a personal agenda that he just kind of put on to kids.
B
So, yeah, I would say so did he convince you?
A
Yeah. Dude, why is the flag waving? Gravity. Oh. So then he came in with the science. Cuz he's a science teacher. And I'm like, this guy knows what.
B
A wire in it.
A
What's that? It's waving on the. On the. When we first went to the moon, the. The flag is waving. Should not be waving up there. This is what happens when you. You put your own thoughts into impressionable children.
B
Yeah. Now you're never gonna unsee that.
A
I'm just like, yeah, that's what it was. Totally can't unsee you believe in any conspiracies.
B
No.
A
That's good.
B
I mean, Epstein didn't kill himself weaving. Well, he's moving it. No, it's got a wire in it. And the way that he's moving it, it's not waving.
A
Listen, 8th grade me remember something completely different. Also, this is the wrong video. Real life, actual moon landing. And I was like, ah, fake news.
B
Oh, yeah, you need the doctored one to where it's waving. No, I'm not a conspiracy person. I'm like a very. Like what? Like realistic. Like just down to like. These are the brass tacks. But I will say I'm very cynical and skeptical of like a lot of the dynamics at play right now. No, I believe in incentives encouraging bad behavior, which we've seen time and again.
A
Yeah, no, that's true. And I. I personally, I'm gonna try to stay away from politics as much as I can, because I am a big old dumb. Dumb. Okay, I'm pretty dumb. I had Alana Glazer on here and it was amazing and I was so excited. But she's really into politics. And I just kind of listened to.
B
And you're like. I was just like, yeah, and tell me more. And I believe exactly what you believe.
A
And whatever you're saying, and you're like, I believe it.
B
Do you think the moon landing was fake? No. Okay, me neither.
A
I don't know why that clown in an eighth grade said so. Just because he was in a. Just because he was crazy, older than me and was my teacher.
B
Yeah, if you're. As a teacher. Oh my God, that's crazy. Yeah, it is pretty crazy. Yeah, but good for him for shooting a shot.
A
Yeah. And he got me up until right now. Okay, because now you're convincing me that that was crazy. See, it's that easy. I'm very convincable, but I stand on a lot of things I stand on like. Like I think everyone should say please and thank you.
B
Good conspiracy theory too.
A
No, I just. I just mean like conspiracies. I could be sway. I could be swayed to a lot of things. Except for like morals, I guess.
B
Oh, okay.
A
My morals will probably always stay the same. Right? Yeah. That's good. I don't know.
B
To have that basic human decency is unwavering.
A
Yeah. Who's to say, you know?
B
Okay.
A
I believe that American Idol can change my life for the better. ABC Monday. American Idol is back.
B
Why are you so emotional? I didn't think I'd ever get to.
A
Be somewhere like this where your vote turns dreamers. You ready for it? You're going to Hollywood League into Idols. There it is, the golden ticket. You are inspiring.
B
You're pretty incredible.
A
American Idol season premiere Monday, 8, 7 Central on ABC and stream on Hulu.
C
Protein is now at Starbucks and it's.
A
Never tasted so good.
C
Try our all new caramel protein lattes with up to 31 grams of protein and options with no added sugar.
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Level up, level up, level up, level.
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Up, level up, level up Your drink at Starbucks.
A
I want to ask you who's been your favorite guest you've had on your podcast.
B
Oh, that's like picking your favorite kid.
A
Well, you have to.
B
Well, you are on my podcast. That's also not fair.
A
Do not say me.
B
Okay. But. Okay.
A
Cop out.
B
I'm like Grace Minj, You know, I think my.
A
This.
B
Okay. I love all my guests equally. If you're watching at home, stop being a politician. I know. I'm sorry. But I really loved. I think the one episode that really sticks out to me is I did like an almost two hour episode with Steph Dag.
A
Oh, fuck. Yeah.
B
Because we really got into it, like, she and I.
A
She likes conspiracies, does she? I don't know. I feel like she does. She's so educated on things I don't even understand.
B
Okay. I don't think that that begets conspiracy theorists.
A
No, no, she's just like. She knows a lot about things and like.
B
Yeah. She's like, well read and she likes to.
A
She questions things.
B
Yeah. And she and I have like the same or similar thoughts on, like, being a girl and also, like. Yeah. And like, which are just like, we. I think we have a similar eating disorder. Is really kind of. Really. Actually what I'm saying.
A
I got the polar one.
B
What's the.
A
It's the. It's the binging in the binging.
B
Yeah, I had. I had that.
A
Oh, all right. Sorry. For me to assume.
B
No, it's like we've all. We've all had. Everything sucks.
A
That's. That's a girl hangout. Just like trauma dumping. But just like knowing that we all share the same thought.
B
Oh, totally.
A
Yeah.
B
It's like two. When you sit down with. You have two things in common. Some sort of assault.
A
Yep.
B
And an eating disorder. And it's not necessarily gonna be the same story for both.
A
No.
B
But if you did, you've touched those things.
A
And that is why it's so good to share and talk. Because we're not alone.
B
Because you're not alone. It actually Is running. And it's, like, so funny. I feel like when you really feel like you're hitting it off with another woman and you're like, we're gonna be friends. It's like you're moments away from sharing a sexual assault story.
A
Oh, big time.
B
And then. And then being like, yeah. And in 2016. 16. My eating disorder was great.
A
He was like, oh, my God. Mine was 2017.
B
And it's like, wait, yours guys. Yours was after he raped you, and you're like, yes.
A
Go figure. And then it's, like, so fun. Yeah. I just. I want to throw in, like, a sorry.
B
Oh, you too.
A
Yeah. Thank you, man.
B
Sorry for what you've been through.
A
Hey. Sorry. What you've been through.
B
See, and that's what.
A
Sorry. What you've been through.
B
It's all the women in the.
A
In the women in the back over here.
B
We've all been there.
A
Yeah, we've all. We've all been there. And that's.
B
That's called being a girl.
A
Yeah.
B
I love it. And then guys are like, oh, it's like. You understand, like, being hard. And I'm like, totally, dude.
A
We were just saying before we got on camera, the only thing I could ever feel bad for. For a guy is that you go bald.
B
Right.
A
That's it. And I don't even feel that hard. Like. Yeah, it just.
B
Okay.
A
No, it's. It's inevitable doom if you have a dad.
B
Right? If you have a dad.
A
Yeah. Maybe they don't have one. Trying to be a little more PC on the pod.
B
Sure. But wait, people who have dads go bald?
A
Yeah, because you see your dad go.
B
Bald, but then if you don't have a dad, you don't go bald.
A
You don't know what's coming.
B
Oh, yeah, totally.
A
Right? Yeah.
B
My dad has his hair.
A
That's huge. You're also not a dude.
B
No, I know, but I have a brother.
A
Oh. So he's doesn't worry about anything, so. Yeah. I don't feel bad for your brother at all. Great. He has. He has no.
B
He has nothing going on. Yeah.
A
He's gonna be all right.
B
Yeah. I think he'll be just fine. He's gonna have his hair.
A
And if you keep running out of writing him out of your story, who's to say what he ends up even doing?
B
Sure. Like, it's limitless.
A
Who's to say?
B
Yeah, he's. He's off on the. He'll be on a mountain somewhere. He'll be touching the sky. He's great. Yeah.
A
Good. For him.
B
Good for him.
A
Climb every mountain.
B
Yes.
A
See every.
B
Hey boys. We have a message for the boys at home. Climb every mountain.
A
And that's some Sound of Music for you boys, huh?
B
Every stream.
A
Is that what it is? I was trying to think of it.
B
That's our message for the boys and as. As. Pick me, girls. Like, that's for you guys. That's because you deserve it and we love you. No, but I am. You know what I will say. I. I am obsessed with men. I think I'm like really, really just taking this on its like head, head and shoulders on face. About face.
A
And you're going on your knees and toes for him. Toes.
B
And I'm sucking them. I just know. I just like. I think it's because they're so simple in so many ways that I'm like, how is this happening, dude?
A
It's crazy. Like, I, I'll. I, I don't know. Some of my guy friends are a little bit older than me and now that I've. My, My frontal lobe has developed. I always thought they were so much smarter than me.
B
Yeah.
A
It came back around. I'm like running circles around these.
B
Oh my God.
A
It's crazy when you realize you're smarter.
B
Than every guy, dude. It's like the world opens up. No, because then you stop. Like, because they tell you things and you go, wait, that doesn't really make sense. But I guess like, maybe you know more than me because guys are also more confident.
A
Yeah.
B
Ignorance.
A
They'll. They're confident in anything.
B
Yeah.
A
My fucking 8th grade teacher told me that the moon landing was fake. And I said yes, sir. Right away.
B
He said it with confidence and he's your teacher, so that's like another thing. But yeah, yeah. Sort of taking advantage of the youth in fact. But, but yeah, no, that's. It's like stuff. They just are.
A
That's what men do. They take care. I mean, they don't take care. They take advantage of the youth.
B
But they were 12.
A
How many men want a young, young girlfriend? Yeah, 21 is too young.
B
21.
A
That's 18 to me.
B
Yeah, just want to say that. Oh, totally. No, I made a video about this that went like really bad.
A
Oh, really? Yeah.
B
Yeah, because when I was 19, I dated a 33 year old guy.
A
Yeah, see, that's wrong.
B
Wrong. And I think about that sometimes because I knew it was wrong in the moment and I was. But, but I was 19 and I was like. And I was like, yeah, whatever. But like, I'm so hot. And he like Likes me. What are you?
A
What?
B
I have never been 33.
A
Yeah.
B
I'm 28, and I literally, like, whoa.
A
That'S a great point there.
B
You know what I mean?
A
That's great. I, I. You haven't even got to that yet.
B
I'm not even 33 yet.
A
I've never been 33. Why have I. Wow. You know what I mean? Yeah.
B
So scary.
A
That makes a lot of sense. I don't know if that makes sense to the men, but that makes sense.
B
As a girl. That makes so much. It's like, like, wow, that's crazy. And, like. And I was. I was on this shoot the other week for this, like, short film, and they had, like, pas and stuff that were, like, 22, and they were like, children, like, babies, and they're super sweet and whatever, but I'm like, you guys are just like, you're super young.
A
What do you. What do you think your dumbest year was? Like, you. You being. You run around being like a silly goose.
B
Ooh. There was a. The first Covid summer, I was one dropped.
A
Second one. To be continued.
B
No, it was. I had Covid the first week of COVID in New York, so. And there wasn't, like, a certainty at that point that, like, we were fine, but it felt pretty much like, based on, like, you know, we kind of were like, we're probably good because we, like, must have some antibodies or something.
A
And didn't know the whole world was shutting down. We're gonna do pots and pans for the nurses. Like, sure. We didn't see that coming.
B
Right? Yeah. So that first summer, I went, oh, you know what? I've had some dumb years, like, all of, I think, everything before 22. I was literally the dumbest person ever.
A
Yeah. I mean, you can't help it. You don't have. You don't know. You don't have any. You don't have anything to back you up.
B
You have nothing. And you also have the confidence of a thousand sons, and you think you.
A
Know everything, and you also want. You don't.
B
And you want to seem older. And so you're like. And you also are, like, drinking for the first time. So you're like.
A
For some of us, I started drinking.
B
When I was 14.
A
Yeah.
B
Like, that was when I, like, actually had my first drink.
A
12 and a half, maybe.
B
Yeah. Okay.
A
Yeah, yeah.
B
But, like, Sorry, Mom. But, like, it. Yeah, but the. But you're like, Well, I guess because I studied abroad.
A
Oh, yeah.
B
And so it was legal to drink. And so then it was just like, let's go. So, like, my whole junior year abroad, it was the most fun I had. But also, I made some full crazy dumb.
A
Like you did the full year there.
B
I did first semester in London and then second semester in Nepal.
A
No.
B
And you cannot be done.
A
Where is Nepal?
B
In Nepal. It is in. It's between India and China.
A
Oh.
B
Or Tibet if you step in. But Chinese occupied Tibet.
A
Okay. I'm learning China. I'm learning English.
B
Yeah. But it's wherever.
A
It's good on tick tock.
B
It's where Everest is. Was it Mount Everest is in Nepal.
A
Okay. Did you climb that mountain?
B
No.
A
Okay.
B
I climbed other mountains.
A
Oh.
B
Sick or not. Like, I did, like, other, like, hikes into the Himalayas.
A
The climbing Mount Everest is fucked up. Oh.
B
I'm actually really glad that they're talking about that now because, like, when I was there, I met, like, some of the families that, like, we were staying with. Homestay families. Right. And so, like, my friend was staying with one of these homestay families, and their father had died because he was these three, like, gorgeous young boys, like, who are just, like, so sweet and, like, they're just babies. And, like, their dad had died because he was a Sherpa.
A
Oh, my God.
B
And he had, like, to make money because it's like, they didn't have access to, like, you know, whatever. Like, he. That was the job that he felt like he could do. And he died on Mount Everest taking tourists. It's like, it's. And that. That's just like a normal thing out there.
A
Yeah. It's so crazy. I went down a rabbit hole recently. It's like, fresh on the mind because people are talking about it now.
B
Yeah.
A
And it's like every time, like, some, like, Taurus white girl is like, I climb on over. It's like, no, you didn't really, though. Like, you didn't do it on your own. Like, you need someone to help you.
B
Do carry your bag.
A
It's so up.
B
Right. It's just such a different kind of place there in, like, cultural understanding. It's just. It really opened my eyes to, like, what is universal and what is not being there. But yeah, I mean, the Everest thing, like, even.
A
Are they saying minj there?
B
They're saying no.
A
I don't know.
B
In Nepal, I wonder what the Tibetan word for minj is. Well, yeah, because I studied to. It's. Well, they speak Nepali and. But I studied Tibetan and Himalayan people. But anyway, the point is.
A
But the.
B
I was thinking about going to base camp when I was there, because that Was like, one of the things of, like, oh, should we do this?
A
Because we're here.
B
And I was sort of put off from it because there's so much. People said that there's so much trash.
A
Yeah.
B
That's walking up the trail to base camp.
A
So crazy there.
B
Yeah. And there's. Because there's just not that same. Like, now when you hike, it's more like, leave no trace and, like, take your trash with you and, like, whatever. But, like, they didn't. They weren't doing that. I'm like. It's just so disgusting. Like, the Himalayas are, like, so beautiful, and so, like, if you ever have the chance to go and see the Himalayas, it's truly, like, the most unbelievable thing, like, you can experience. But, like, it is, like, to defile that with, like, Snickers bars is, like, crazy, dude.
A
Fucking. A bunch of kind bars all over the place. Insane camel. Camelbacks.
B
Yeah.
A
Literally.
B
And like, a broken shoe, like, what.
A
So what made you go to both of those places for study abroad?
B
Well, London. I was just trying to study acting, and they had a really good program there, and it was, like, really amazing, and, like, one of the best things I've ever done.
A
But were you in any shows?
B
Yeah, we did, like, Shakespeare. I was like, oh, you wanted to be a Shakespearean?
A
Yeah, we talked about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
B
So I was like. We did, like. It was more like, scene study stuff, so we didn't do, like, a full. Full play, but I was like, Beatrice and Much Ado about Nothing.
A
Oh, yes, of course. Yeah. I don't know what that is. Okay, so now I'm gonna ask. What is that?
B
It's a Shakespeare play.
A
Okay, gotcha, gotcha.
B
And then we also did, like, Jacobean tragedies, which are crazy because it's like, everyone's. It's very over the top, and, like, everyone's dying in, like, cannibalism and, like.
A
Cannibalism?
B
Yeah, like, spells and shit. Like, it's all, like, weird, crazy, like, cheating.
A
Ahead of his time and.
B
Yeah, it's insane.
A
That means.
B
Because it was, like, a tragedy. And so, like, in, like, classical tragedy is, like. It's. It's just so heightened. It's so over the top. It's like Greek tragedies, where it's like Oedipus, where it's, like.
A
Speaking of Greek tragedies.
B
Yeah.
A
I don't know. Do you watch Salt Lake City Real Housewives?
B
No, but I know about it, so.
A
It'S, like, the number one in the.
B
Franchise, and I need to be Watching this.
A
It's so funny.
B
Everyone is telling me this, and I watched New York and Beverly Hills.
A
That's. Those are my favorite. So you like this? Yeah.
B
Okay. So I have to watch.
A
Yeah, those are. Those are my two favorite as well. So they had them go to Greece for the final show, and they made them. They had. They brought in people and they interviewed them, and they. They were asking each other what they think of the other housewives. And with that, they made a Greek tragedy and they performed it in front of them, and it was just on everyone on the cast.
B
That's hilarious.
A
And they made them sit down and watch these. The producers were cooking with it, and they know they can with them because they fuck with them. Heavy. They fuck with them so hard. It's crazy that they haven't even, like, noticed. Oh, my God. You gotta watch. It's okay. It's.
B
And you know what? I'm gonna start from the beginning. I need a new show. I'm not really watching shows right now.
A
No, Nothing.
B
I'm just between shows. I don't know. I've been. I've been reading.
A
Oh, there you go. I've been writing.
B
I've been writing and reading, actually.
A
Oh, good for you.
B
What do you been doing? I've been freaking writing poems and crying.
A
That's beautiful.
B
Thank you.
A
That's great. Yeah, I think. I think that's. That's. That's like, another thing of, like, women being a little bit older and in touch with their feelings.
B
I think it helps me be less crazy. The people around me, because I can get it out in the privacy of my notes app. But it is. Maybe it's. Maybe it's a little dramatic.
A
Do. Are you gonna. Are you gonna milk and honey it. You're gonna. You're gonna publish it? These poems, I don't know.
B
I feel like they're probably not good enough to be published.
A
Don't say that.
B
So.
A
You bet. They're beautiful.
B
Hey.
A
Or up. And that makes a good poem, too. But you know what?
B
I do the Slow zoom videos that I've. I don't know if you've seen those.
A
Oh, yeah, those are awesome. Yeah.
B
Those actually come from my poetry. So, like, I'll write a poem that's just, like, the raw emotion of it, and then I'll sort of, like, rewrite it to be that.
A
I love those. Those are really cool. Thank you. And then because you have the microphone and you're all zoomed out, and my immediate thought is, that's so smart. I would probably be yelling From a bridge.
B
That's what got you the day.
A
I feel. I was like, yeah, she's gotta. She's got a well, well put together production going on here.
B
That's the only thing that I, like, put in that much effort. I mean, I have made sketch in the past where I, like, really go for it, but.
A
Yeah, you've been sketching lately.
B
I gotta get back into it. I have some ideas that I have to write. It's just that they. When I make a sketch, I, like, want to make it like the. I don't know, I'm just such a type a person. Then we're doing so many things at once, it's like, hard to, like, really do. But I have this idea that I really want to make, but. So stay tuned.
A
If you stay tuned.
B
If you stay tuned, I might make. I did do one recently. That was the pov. So, like, those are easy and quick, but it was pov. You're proposing to me.
A
Oh, that was hilarious. That was so funny. Yeah, that was a really good one because it's like. Shut up. Shut the fuck up.
B
Stop your l. Shut up.
A
What? Are you joking? It's really good. Thank you.
B
So beautiful. Will you marry me? What?
A
What?
B
Wait, sorry, What? This is real? You.
A
I'm asking you to marry me.
B
Yeah. That was like, basically what happened when my boyfriend asked me to be his girlfriend. I literally was just like, what? And he was like, will you be my girlfriend? I was like, are you pranking me? Like, what are you talking about?
A
And he was like, no. Did you. Did you ever hear about. Did I bring this up on. On the. On your podcast? Did you ever do zap as a kid?
B
Wait, what was it again?
A
So, like, that immediately makes me think of. There was this game we would play in middle school called Zap, and someone would write a time on the top of your hand and then a name on your palm.
B
Oh, yeah.
A
And if you looked at the name on your palm before the time, you had to go ask that person out. And so every time I got asked out since I was a child was a zap. And so now I always think it's a prank because, like, one time, some kid, he was like, very serious with it. He was like, yeah, we could go get pizza. My mom could pick you up. Like, we could go together. It be awesome. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, that would be. Yeah, I think I'm like, I'm. I don't think. I know I'm free. Yeah, let's do that. And he's like, it was a zap. Like, oh, you didn't have to go so elaborate on it. Yes. And improv guy, how old are you? Like, I was in, like, sixth or seventh grade.
B
That would. Oh, my God, kids are so mean.
A
They still can't trust.
B
I get that.
A
So I thought maybe you were zapped because.
B
No, as a 28 year old woman, I wasn't zapped. I was assaulted. So, No, I just. No, I just think that men lie.
A
Yeah.
B
It's not really. Men are always like, I care about you. And then they turn around and they.
A
Go, no, I was just with you. Yeah. You're not very chill about this joke. I just wanted to hit for a little while.
B
And you're like, wait, it's totally.
A
So he asked you what was it a romantic way?
B
It was actually. It was New Year's Eve.
A
Oh, that's right.
B
Yeah, he counted down. We counted down from 10. Whatever. And then. And then I was super drunk, so I was just, like, making out with him. And then he's like. I was like, yeah. And he's like.
A
And he's like. Every time he got, like a breath, he was like, will you.
B
Yeah, he was like.
A
I think he.
B
Because I didn't realize this obviously, but he, like, had this thing in his mind where he's like, I'm gonna do this now. Like, he had planned it.
A
Yeah. So it's like, very set. And. Yeah. And I was like, oh.
B
I'm like, grinding on him in front of my friends. I'm like, yeah. And then he's.
A
He's like.
B
And he's like, will you be my girlfriend? And I was like, what? Can't hear you.
A
I'm having too much fun.
B
I'm like, get over here. He's like, no, seriously, please let me ask you this question.
A
Oh, so that's exactly like the sketch you did.
B
No, it really was exactly like that. Yeah. So that was. Yeah, it was fun, but it was very sweet.
A
Yeah. That's adorable.
B
Yeah, I know.
A
So that's officially about two weeks now.
B
Yeah. So we've only known each other for two weeks.
A
We've known each other for two weeks.
B
No, we've been dating for like, three months. Okay, so it is very new.
A
But it was official New Year's.
B
Yeah.
A
Hell yeah.
C
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A
Savings versus Comparable Verizon plans plus the cost of optional benefits, plan features and Texas and fees vary. Savings with three plus lines include third.
C
Line free via monthly bill credits.
A
Credit stop if you cancel any lines. Qualifying credit required. As someone who doesn't know, what's the difference from before it was official. Yeah. So now that it is official, official.
B
Well, no moving in together. There's no difference. No, I don't really know. Yeah, I, I wasn't. Well, that's also why I wasn't really expecting it too, because I was like, I mean, we're already dating.
A
Yeah.
B
You know, and we had to be your girlfriend.
A
I thought. I was.
B
I'm like, wait, what was I saying before?
A
She's seeing all the girls and then it's just a big fight. Yeah. Blowout fight. Yeah. It's supposed to be Roman. Yeah.
B
And I'm like, what the is wrong with you? He immediately breaks up with me. No. Yeah. I mean, we had had a conversation like a few weeks before that where we were like, this is. I mean, obviously we're only seeing each other.
A
Yeah.
B
Cuz well, we were friends. We were hanging out as friends for like a month. And then, and then he was like, wait, I actually like, like you.
A
And I was like, I want to ruin this friendship.
B
And then I laughed at him. This is I really putting this guy through the ringer.
A
Well, you know, he, he seems to have adored it.
B
Yeah.
A
So.
B
So I guess I'll just keep going.
A
Fucking win.
B
Yeah.
A
You guys, you guys are going to the gym together.
B
I know.
A
Yeah. Yeah, once. Oh, okay. Well, we don't listen to your most recent part. It sounds like you're going all the time.
B
You kind of go to the gym together. No, it's just like. Yeah, we're just kind of like a workout couple. We're just like at the gym, you just, you do.
A
You delete everything you have now and you just start doing workout shit.
B
Oh my God. Yeah.
A
I would have to call you on the phone. I know we're not all that close, but I would have to call you on the real phone probably Get a landline.
B
Yeah, Buy a landline, plug it in and then go. Hey, what is happening?
A
Payphone. Like, I gotta, I gotta collect. Collect call.
B
Yeah.
A
Do you.
B
Do you know what's going on?
A
Are you good? Show up at your house? I just want to check in.
B
Yeah, well, let's check motivational workout videos. I start posting, like, slogans on my page. You could do anything.
A
You put your mind so swole all.
B
Of a sudden and tan.
A
Yeah.
B
You start going to tanning beds. Like, not blonde. Yeah. Guys. That I should do this. Are you guys seeing this?
A
I. I don't. I don't want that for you.
B
I'm doing it.
A
No, come on now, listen, I've built a long.
B
I have a nice base of comedy fans.
A
Let's pivot. We're going to pivot.
B
I've always said the key to success.
A
Is pivoting, so I just pivot. And leg day. Yeah. I'm just doing.
B
Yeah. It starts as like one day a week. I'm doing leg day, I'm posting about it. You're like, that's weird. That's. And then all of a sudden.
A
So if I. If I see any stories of you at the gym, I'm like, it's happening. Okay. So it's going to be a slow burn.
B
Okay.
A
Because just one story turns into a real.
B
Turns.
A
It turns into your gym is life.
B
The rest of your life.
A
Gym, tan, laundry.
B
I know, I do. I do work out a lot.
A
That's good. That's a good thing.
B
Yeah. I like to do.
A
But it shouldn't be your.
B
It's not my whole life.
A
Whole life. Yeah.
B
No, comedy's my whole life.
A
That is, That's. Yes.
B
Stand up comedy is my life to the point where I'm getting room for nothing else.
A
How long you been running with it?
B
I've done. I. It's been four years.
A
Four years?
B
Yeah.
A
Hell yeah.
B
You've been what?
A
Two. I did it when I first moved here, on and off so. Since 2020. Oh, but like full time, two years?
B
Yeah.
A
Yeah.
B
Because you, like, took a big break.
A
Or you took like a break or like my kind of my, my thing was like, I was just doing it willy nilly style.
B
Yeah.
A
And like when I've got the confidence to go do a mic or like, if a friend asked me to do a show, I would do the show. But I told you I was writing new material every time and I was like, why isn't this clicking? It's just like I was being a big dummy about it.
B
That's so funny.
A
Yeah, dude.
B
Yeah.
A
So when you first started with that, when did you move here?
B
After college, so. Yeah, 2020. Well, yeah, it was, like, January 2020. And then I spent this summer, that first Covid summer, in Nantucket, which was basically just a bender.
A
Okay.
B
That was what I was trying to say before, actually. So glad we circled back on that. That was probably the dumbest. Yeah, that was the dumbest I've ever been.
A
Yeah. But you. You're on island time.
B
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
A
Who cares if you go to an island?
B
Yeah. Because my grandparents have a. Have a house there, and I like.
A
Did you have, like, a summer job, or are you doing pretty good?
B
I was working remote that summer for my tech job.
A
Oh, no.
B
Yeah. So I was, like, 9 to 5 ing like, on the porch at the beach house.
A
That's awesome. That's incredible.
B
And then I would just get up.
A
Yeah. That's the dream.
B
And there was no covet on the island.
A
Oh, pod. Because covet.
B
Yeah, there was no covet on the island. There was, like, one case. The entire, like, five.
A
Any. Any place that's, like, around water. There was no covet. Florida, no covet.
B
How is that possible?
A
There was Covid.
B
But surely it must have been.
A
But I see nothing here. Nothing.
B
I know, but it was like, it was all outside and, like, whatever. Jump in the ocean. So whatever. But technically, there were no documented cases, but. Yeah, no, it was. And I. Yeah, we were just. It was like, me and my five friends, and we were just. I lost myself that summer.
A
That's awesome. It sounds like you found yourself. I think that. I don't think you have to look at that in a negative light. I think that sounds like an awesome summer that you had a blast and no regrets. Yeah. And you got to do.
B
When you're young and you're young, you're wild, nothing else going on.
A
Like, you're truly throwing your minj around the island.
B
My mint was all up in that place.
A
It was on file.
B
Oh, my God. That was crazy.
A
And then. Yeah.
B
And, like, we would get. We would drink so much, and then you, like, get hungover and then jump in the ocean the next day. You know? It's the best.
A
Nothing cures jumping in the ocean.
B
Dunk in the ocean.
A
Oh, my God.
B
Oh, my God. Hungover at the beach. You're like, it's fine.
A
I want to go to the ocean right now.
B
Yeah, let's go to the ocean.
A
Oh, my God. I wish you could swim in the Hudson.
B
I know.
A
Connor o' Malley is the only person who's ever swam in the ocean, and.
B
I'm shocked he survived that.
A
Well, I mean, he's a little. His brain chemistry is probably not all that great. Have you ever seen any of his videos?
B
Big fan.
A
Conor o'. Malley.
B
We gotta be cousins, right, buddy? I'm such a fan of his.
A
Speaking of Connors, both of our first guests on our pods was Connor. Connor Wood Fibula, if you will.
B
I, sweetest boy alive with us looking.
A
Down on us like good old.
B
I can't wait. Send him the picture I took of us in front of that. That is so hilarious. Can I have that for my bedroom?
A
Yeah. I gotta get rid of these. Look, they do.
B
Maybe because there's only four.
A
Every time people walk in, they're like. It's like a shrine. I'm like, the shrine of these.
B
Just the four.
A
It was supposed to be all the comics that come on, and they were gonna sign it and hang them on the wall, and they were like, yeah, it's not gonna. It's not gonna fit.
B
But they immediately stopped trying.
A
Yeah, that's. Yeah, I feel the same way. Okay, we're gonna do a revamp. We're gonna figure it out. Yeah, Revamp the colors. They clash. 2026 was changing things up, bitches. Almost at a year.
B
Really?
A
Almost out of here. You're almost out of here, right?
B
I don't know. Oh, on my pod. No, I started in July.
A
Oh, July.
B
Okay. Yes.
A
That baby's new. Where?
B
We got a new pup.
A
New paws popping off. Popping up. Pussy minges. Sorry about that. Oh, I gotta. I gotta ask you this. Who's your favorite comic? Mike.
B
Wow.
A
Some people hate that question. Some people love it.
B
It's such a hard question because it's like, favorite multiple.
A
A bunch of them. No, no. Wrong answers.
B
The wrong answer.
A
That's true.
B
Is Louis CK Okay?
A
He's hilarious.
B
He's a phenomenal, phenomenal writer. You ever watch his show? Yeah, he's, like, one of the reasons why I, like, do stand up. Like, he's, like, so good. Amy Schumer also, like, her first and seconds. Wait, what was her second special? I can't remember, but, like, her first special definitely was like. I mean, that was, like, one of the first things I watched, and I was like, wow. Like, yeah. Like, I think she. She, like, ushered in on her back, like, a generation of, like, female comics.
A
I'd say so. Yeah, because.
B
Because she also opened up a door for, like, really, like, feminine comedy. And also, like, the way that she talked about sexuality. I think was really, really earth shattering. And we totally take that for granted. And you know that it's so amazing because now it's seen as hack because it was like, so. Because it's so obvious now because it's so known because of her.
A
That's true. That's true. Yeah, it's funny. Yeah, it's funny how it goes, like, back in, like, a full circle kind of thing.
B
But she invented that thing, and then a bunch of people tried to do it, and that's why now it's like, oh, yeah. But like, she. Yeah, she was. I mean, yeah, it's phenomenal what she did. And then. And also, like, I. I mean, Train Wreck is probably, like, my all time favorite movie, and I just, like, love everything she's done in her career.
A
You guys were DMing at one point. Yeah.
B
She's like, yeah, we know each other.
A
Hell, yeah. I opened Pretty Sick. That your favorite comic is like, well.
B
It feels like I. In your brain.
A
Like, that's crazy.
B
Yeah. Well, I opened for her one time at the Comedy Cellar.
A
No. Oh, that's really cool.
B
Yeah, she, like, had me. We met at this event, and then she, like, she. I. You know, she followed me on Instagram. We DM'd. And then she was like, yeah, do you want to open for me at the Cellar tomorrow? And I was like, you said tomorrow? Yeah. And, yeah, it was, like, the scariest day of my life. I, like, called my friends. I was like, how am I gonna do this?
A
Go up and do, like, five open mics that night, literally.
B
And I was like, panic. I was, like, on my way to.
A
A show, like, yeah, just on stage. Do you think it's gonna work at the seller when I open for Amy Schumer? Do you guys think it's gonna work like that?
B
I'm pretty sure that the show that I did to prep for the next day, like, I mean, the spot that I had that night, I'm pretty sure I bombed. And then I was like, because you're so nervous.
A
How'd you do with the.
B
It was great. That show was great. And I heard her laughing, which meant the world to me.
A
Wow.
B
Because it was the Fat Black Pussycat Lounge, so it was like the smaller room.
A
Yeah.
B
And you can, like, watch from upstairs. And. Yeah. I mean, she was just unbelievably kind to me and still is.
A
I mean, she's so sick.
B
Yeah.
A
But favorite comic.
B
Yeah. To meet your. But that's the cool thing about this industry is that it's, like, not that big and, like, we're just a few. I mean, you were, you know, opening for Whitney. It's like, those are, like, the same thing. Huge, happy hitters, right? Like. Like, you had Bert on the pod. Like, these are, like, people who sell out arenas. Like, it's just the craziest thing.
A
It is really nuts. And, like, everyone. Not even for the most part, everyone has been nothing but nice.
B
Yeah.
A
Like, I'd say for me, personally, it's.
B
Yeah, it's been really, really cool.
A
It's just, like, sick and. And then it's like, it makes you, like, want to do as well as they do so that one day you can return the favor for someone else. Someone else. Yeah.
B
That's so true.
A
It's really cool.
B
It's really nice.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah. So those are definitely, like, maybe the two comedians that shaped my career the most, I think. Like, who's. Who's sort of, like, in the mix right now. I think Maddie Weiner is one of the best.
A
Oh, my gosh. She's so funny.
B
Could not be better, I think. Jordan Jensen. Hilarious.
A
Yes. So funny.
B
I mean, I was, like, cracking up out loud alone in my house, like, so good. It's like, I don't even laugh at stuff anymore because I just see so much comedy that I'm just like, oh, yeah, that's a good one. But, like, when I. I'm, like, like, watching her Netflix special, and I'm just like, she's, like, phenomenal, because she just is full of surprises. Like, you just never know where she's going next. Yeah, she's so good. Microbiglia. Obsessed with him.
A
I could see you guys getting along on that pod.
B
I love us, too. Yeah. I mean, there's. I mean, there's so many. There's so many talented people.
A
I know. It's a loaded question because then you don't want to leave anyone out.
B
I know. Now I'm like, Who's, like, really important to me that I forgot. And there's new ones all the time. And there's also, like, I love comedians that are like, super different from me. Like. Like Sean. God.
A
Kindi.
B
Like, he's. He's, like, having, like, a moment in the mix right now, and I'm. He's also, like, a good friend of mine, and, like, I'm just. He's so, like, jolly on stage and in real life, but, like, he's doing really, like, sort of, like, clean and, like, just. And I feel like what I do is so, like, dark and, like. Yeah, let's talk about what it's like, being a woman, you know? And then I watch him and he, like, he did a joke about yogurt and I was like, that's so fudgeing good.
A
Isn't it so funny when someone does a joke and it's like, yeah, dude, it was. I. I can't believe no one started that yet. It's right, it's. It was right there. But it's so fucking funny.
B
Yeah. And it's like. But it's. That's what makes it so brilliant. Is that, like, you know, that's why it's so hard to think stuff like that. It's like, yeah, he's.
A
I love him.
B
I love watching him. He kills every time. Molly Carney. It's so funny. Hilarious friend of mine. I'm just like, listening.
A
Hey, don't. Hey, don't hurt yourself. I know. Everyone knows. You want. Let's play a game. Okay. Yeah, let's just play. Yeah, let's play.
B
Okay.
A
You know who you are.
B
I love your comedy.
A
I think.
B
No, you know what's so cool about comedy? New York? I'm like, a fan of everybody. Like, I really like and I love. I. There's so many cool and so many talented comedians. They're all doing amazing stuff and we get to just like, hang out with them all the time and learn stuff from each other. Who's your favorite?
A
I, I. I'm the kind of person who doesn't love that question.
B
So you asked me that.
A
Well, and I did preface. Some people don't like that question. Yeah, I know. I. And I just off the top of.
B
My head, I almost started crying in a bad way.
A
It's like, Whitney, I have like a. I have a weird bunch. I have Whitney Cummings, Shane Gillis. Oh, well.
B
Shane Gill. Yeah. Fucking Shane Gillis. Yeah.
A
Nate Bargazzi, Mitch Hedberg, Bo Burnham inside. Just like, those are just like a four of a weird mix.
B
Sure. But that's great.
A
I like those guys. Then, like, all my friends, like, then it gets tricky.
B
Then it gets tricky because it's like.
A
These are real people that you.
B
Yeah, we're all.
A
I don't want to leave anyone out doing stuff together.
B
And it's like, I know.
A
I think Rosebud Baker is a fantastic.
B
Rosebud Baker is so fantastic.
A
Good writer. And her special is so sick because.
B
She did it while pregnant and after.
A
Yeah. I've never seen anything like that. That's so cool.
B
Ali Wong.
A
Who?
B
Well, well, it's like, how am I gonna up the pregnancy?
A
That's true.
B
I'm getting an abortion on stage for my next special.
A
Oh, you meant on Monday or something? Well, you know us women, we just have to level on up.
B
Yeah, we gotta do something with our bodies, I think.
A
And then how do you beat abortion?
B
That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.
A
I'm gonna have to figure that out. Yeah, I adopt a kid from stage. Like, hey, kid, you're mine now. I don't even know what that means.
B
You just do your set. Your kid.
A
This is just someone's child.
B
Yeah.
A
No, I have my kid do my set and he's got an earpiece. It's a boy. That's my kid.
C
For the first time ever, a truly beautiful medical breakthrough promises physical perfection. One shot makes you hot, but with terrifying consequences. In the new original series, FX is the Beauty. The glamorous world of supermodels turns deadly as mysterious deaths draw in FBI agents and a shadowy billionaire who will stop at nothing to protect his empire from executive producer Ryan Murphy. FX is the Beauty. Now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney for bundle subscribers. Everyone deserves to be connected. That's why T Mobile and US Cellular are joining forces. Switch to T Mobile and save up to 20% versus Verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out. Check the math@t mobile.com Switch and now T Mobile is in US cellular stores.
A
Savings versus Comparable Verizon plans, plus the cost of optional benefits plan features in Texas. And fees vary. Savings with three plus lines include third.
C
Line free via monthly bill credits.
A
Credit stop if you cancel any lines. Qualifying credit required. All right, so I do have a game. Now let me. Let me read the rules so I don't forget. So this game is called Friend Crush, Friend Zone or Ghost. A little specialty for you. We're both going to pull a character from a popular TV show or movie, read their description, then decide if we would have a friend Crush a Friend Zone or ghost them.
B
Okay. Okay.
A
First.
B
Okay. Stephen DeMarco from Tell Me Lies. I haven't seen the show, although I did go to the premiere party and didn't know anything or anyone. And then they made me stand next to the really hot stars. Everyone on that show is really hot.
A
Flex. Everyone.
B
She was so hot.
A
So hot.
B
And they literally like. And they were like, do you want to take a picture with the. Like, yeah, take a picture. And I was like, oh, and I'm wearing a T shirt next to two supermodels. And the flash is so on.
A
Oh, dude, will you send us that so we can put that in here. I.
B
Guys, you're gonna. It's so embarrassing.
A
I need the visual on that. That's funny.
B
No, it's, like, deeply. It's, like, actually haunts me. Like, I can see it in my mind's eye right now because, like, how much I was just. I and my team, like, my agent or whatever, like, sent. They send the, like, pictures to your team, and then, like, my manager, like, sent it to me, and she's like.
A
Here are the pictures from the event. And I'm like.
B
And I literally send back. Every time they've done that to me, I send back an email and I go, I'm sorry. Okay. Hey, I'm sorry. No one should have to see that.
A
Sorry about that.
B
Anyway. Yeah, no, it's just. It was really brutal. But they're so hot on that show.
A
Okay.
B
Stephen embodies narcissistic and sociopathic qualities, and he sees people primarily as tools he can use to get what he wants. And he feels no remorse for inflicting pain or for the consequences of his actions. That's my type. So Friend crush.
A
Friend crush?
B
Yeah. Crush me into a million pieces. No. I'm turning over a new page. I'm in a new era. I'm in a new, healthy era.
A
Yeah, she's married.
B
So what is you, Mary? Kill. Kill this guy.
A
No, no, It's Friend Crush, Friend zone, or Ghost Ghost special for you.
B
Kill him with a gun.
A
I'm just gonna kill him. Why don't we.
B
He deserves to die. No, Ghost ghost, ghost.
A
Turn him into a ghost ghost.
B
But me of, like, six months ago would say.
A
Let'S take that one for a spin.
B
You'd be like, yeah, but I'll give him a year, and then he'll ruin me. I'm like, but he's so funny. But no one gets me like him. But nobody understands me like him. No, no.
A
And that's. That's. You just literally described the show. Pretty much. Really? Yeah. But she's also toxic.
B
I've heard it's really good. It's a great show.
A
Yeah.
B
Okay. You can watch that. And Sol, like. Okay, guys, don't let me forget.
A
Okay. Yes.
B
What's yours?
A
I've got Shane Hollander. Oh, I don't know why I went Irish. I can't do Russian. I can't do Russia.
B
Thank God that's on. There he is.
A
No, how would you. Russian.
B
Yeah, Hollander.
A
Russian. Shane Hollander. Yeah. I can't rush. Russian accent.
B
Yeah.
A
Shane Hollander. I can't do Russian. Oh, no. I Didn't know I couldn't do that. That's so annoying. So his description is hyper. Hyper competent. Competent.
B
Competent, yeah.
A
Hyper competent, dedicated and deeply polite Canadian hockey star characterized as beautiful, neurotic flower who is socially awkward, intensely focused on hockey, and likely autistic. It is friend crush, friend zone, or ghost. That's going to be a friend zone for me personally.
B
Have you seen the show?
A
Yeah. No. I fucking adore. I love that show so much. I wish I. Like, if I was gay, he'd be still not my type, but I.
B
But you would maybe go for it.
A
But I mean, he was. I don't know. He kind of creeps me out in that, honestly, if I'm not going to lie. Oh, okay. Like, I'm more of a. I'm more of a. What's the other one's name?
B
Ilia.
A
I'm more of an Ilia girl. Like, yeah, like, he's like, he's on it. Like, he's like any. Any. Like, goes away for a while and. But it's all on his terms. And I. That's. That's more my type because he's. He's calling the shots and he's also mean to me, kind of.
B
That show is a celebration of the male butt.
A
It sure is.
B
And I think that's really special.
A
Plump and juiced.
B
The way that those men have really, like, I think they've done like a lot of work for all of us.
A
They've taken this country and Canada as well. Sorry. It's a Canadian show by storm.
B
Yeah. Those two gentlemen have changed the course of history.
A
Did you know that none of this would have happened if. So it was gonna be out on like a small channel on in Canada. And just like three days before it was supposed to air, HBO took it and. And bought it and. And put it on their platform. So, like, nobody would have seen this show if it wasn't for hbo. And I don't want. Well, actually, I love hbo because we all do, right? Yeah. Because in Netflix as well. So one. One day. And all of Daddy.
B
I love Daddy's.
A
I just.
B
I love Daddy 1. I love Daddy 2. I love Daddy 3, and I love Daddy. All of the daddies. And they become one daddy again because we have do.
A
And we don't have to get into the monopoly of networks. But I do believe that they kind of. They made this like, you know, like if HBO didn't pick it up, like they would have a platform. Had that.
B
Yeah. Thousand percent.
A
It's so sick that that happened for them. That's just like pure fucking luck.
B
Yeah. That's crazy. Thank God.
A
Not luck.
B
Because I think that's a great show. Yeah, it's a great show and I'm glad that that, like, was able to get through because it was great. But yeah, it was.
A
It was so good.
B
I. What I was shocked by was because it was so sex forward at the beginning, I was like, sex show.
A
Let's go. Lock it in. Yeah.
B
The last episode, the whole end of it. It's a love show.
A
I know. And I knew we were gonna get there.
B
I didn't know.
A
I knew we were gonna get there. Eventually.
B
You're just gonna. Each other. I thought that all they were gonna. Each other and then the other guy was gonna. The other guy. And I thought they were the guy. The other guy.
A
I still think they might have once or twice.
B
Oh, Ilya and Scott or whatever.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah. Maybe. Oh, maybe we'd have to read the book.
A
Yeah, I think I'm gonna read the book.
B
Read the book.
A
I think I'm gonna have to read the book because I don't know if I can wait till next year. But I also don't want to ruin it to see it with my real eyes. So I don't know. That's how I. I don't know how I feel about reading a book before seeing a movie because you picture one thing and then you.
B
Right.
A
And then you see another.
B
I think it's good to read the book first. Yeah.
A
No, and historically, that's what people say, but I personally would see it one way and then be all pissed off because they didn't do it the way I thought it was.
B
Right. You know, I get that.
A
And like, the show added things that aren't in the book or in or that aren't in the book or they took things away from the book. And it's like, I would have been pissed. So I don't know. I'm gonna. I'm gonna think about it.
B
Okay.
A
I'm gonna think about reading it. You're gonna read it?
B
No.
A
Okay. Next.
B
I just. I just can't do the smut of it all. I can't be wet all the time.
A
Oh, yeah, no, of course not. We already started off wet.
B
I, like, I can't be dripping on the train. Like, that's just not really, like, unless.
A
It'S rainy, then you blend in.
B
Yeah, I just. I guess I'll bring a water bottle.
A
Bring a water bottle. Whoops.
B
Some electrolytes. Coconut water.
A
Yeah, of course.
B
All right. Jax Teller, Sons of Anarchy. Okay, I haven't seen that. A charismatic but introspective outlaw biker, torn between his violent outlaw life and a desire to honor his deceased father's vision for a legitimate, less violent club.
A
Friend Crush. Friend zone or Ghost.
B
I. His friend zone. I don't know what he looks like.
A
Nor you want to pull that up.
B
Can we get a.
A
She's happy too. I can see it on.
B
This isn't really giving me a lot. Wait. Outlaw biker. Torn between is fine.
A
I guess we're supposed to.
B
Oh, it's like a Hamlet kind of thing. It's like.
A
We're actually supposed to go off of the description, though. So I think pulling it up is actually against the law for this game.
B
Really?
A
We can show you after. But your answer is friend zone.
B
Because he's like a bad boy trying to be good. Yeah, I'm over that.
A
Okay. I love that. And this is what he looks like.
B
Friend zone. Friend zone. I'll. I'll be there for you in the capacity of a friend. That's all.
A
I.
B
We're good.
A
This one is long. Peter Irvine. All her fault. Did you watch that?
B
No.
A
You got a lot to watch. Description.
B
This is really just giving. This is homework. Like, I've gotten so much homework on this podcast.
A
God, he's a prime example of controlling, narcissistic man. Same personality, character traits just heightened in a different level. Everything has to be done right. Everyone needs to rely on him for things. He needs to have everyone by his side and be devoted to him. It's toxic and sickening. No one can escape him unless he gets killed in the end. So I ruined the show for you, which I didn't see coming. And I'm sorry about that.
B
I'm not gonna remember.
A
Don't worry, okay?
B
My brain doesn't work.
A
Perfect. That's me making you forget.
B
Yeah.
A
Oh, I already forgot about Connor o'. Malley. This guy is gonna be a ghost. He's scary. Ghost. He's a scary guy. You don't wanna. I'm a ghost. Him. He's so bizarre. And also, he was in Scooby Doo.
B
Like, was he hot?
A
Yeah, like, he's the guy from Scooby Doo.
B
It's like, you can't.
A
You can't.
B
If he was hot, I would say I think he.
A
He could be hot. If I saw him at the bar.
B
He's telling you what to do.
A
Oh, but no, you can't do that. I don't think so.
B
You don't like that?
A
I don't think I like that.
B
Oh, my God. I love it when guys tell me what to do.
A
I think we have very different types of guys.
B
That's why we can be friends.
A
I think it's good.
B
Yeah, that's good for female friendship.
A
You want to do one more?
B
Yeah.
A
Okay. Perfect.
B
Wonder what I got.
A
Who's it gonna be? Who's my husband?
B
Okay. Pete Campbell, Mad Men. Wait, is that the newbie guy? So that's not John Ham, is it? Flawed, ambitious, and often pathetic. Junior advising executive characterized by desperate striving for success, a sense of entitlement from his privileged background, pathological jealousy, and manipulative behavior. So actually, no zero positive things listed on this.
A
You're a really good reader. That's.
B
Okay. Well, your teachers in middle school were considered conspiracy theorist who shows the moon landing. So, yeah, children were left behind, were learning. Okay. You're like, wow, you can read. Grace literally looked me in the eyes and said, you can read. That's crazy.
A
Like, better than me, man. I was impressed. I didn't even hear what you said.
B
I was just like, wow.
A
She's going, look at you go, girl. You can read fast and out loud. Anyway.
B
Kill.
A
All right, one more. I hope it's a small one.
B
You guys really wrote a lot on these.
A
Cal Hawkley, Titanic. That's his fucking name.
B
Who's Cal? Is that the me?
A
Oh, is it her OG Husband? Okay. Description. Arrogant, possessive, and entitled millionaire antagonist in Titanic, representing the controlling upper class who views his fiance as property, resorting to manipulation, violence, framing, and outright cheating to maintain control. I mean, yeah, he's bad. He's bad. He's a bad guy. Hey.
B
Cheats a little.
A
Oh.
B
He sees women as objects. You're gonna. You're gonna get mad at that.
A
He's bad.
B
And it's like, guys can't do anything anymore. It's like the woke mob is like, after it say, come on.
A
At this current point in time, I'm gonna ghost him. But I'll tell you what. In my impressionable years, maybe 23, that would have probably been one of my friends, honestly.
B
Yeah. When you're 23, the judgment. The lack of judgment you have over people. I think about my. The people that I hooked up with. It's like, below 23 and below. And I'm like, I'm lucky to be live.
A
Yeah.
B
Like, it is crazy what's gone on. I. Like, I've never had an std. I feel like now that I say that about it, but, like, that's. I cannot believe that that's. Given what I've seen, that's really good, man. Right.
A
Look at all these years. Yeah, thank you. I haven't either, because I don't. So.
B
Yeah, I use. I mean, I also use protection.
A
I protect myself by just protecting against.
B
Celibacy is actually the most effective way.
A
Yeah. And. And it's. And it's obviously by choice. Somebody called me a femcel the other day.
B
That's so funny. We've all gone through a femcel period.
A
Yeah. I mean, I just. I don't want to ever claim that as a thing that I really.
B
Wait, was it like a femcel is like a good thing or a bad thing?
A
No, terrible thing. I mean, any kind of cell, you don't want to be a cell. You don't want any. So you don't want to be an incel. A femcel. You don'. Be stuck in a cell, like.
B
Yeah, you're right. Cell is bad. You're right. I'm sorry I said that.
A
It's okay. Do you also said something really funny when we were on the podcast last week? I said we were talking about dry January.
B
Yeah.
A
And. And I go, yeah, I usually do it about every year, but this year I did two weeks off. I mean, two months off in the fall, so I'm not going to do it. And you go, oh, do you. Do you like doing Dry January? No, nobody likes doing Dry January. It's just. You do it because you fucking have to. That was so. That was so funny.
B
Well, because for me, I, like, don't. I. I don't drink that much. And so I. And I do. I. I've been now trying to drink more.
A
20, 26. I'm gonna get wasted a lot more.
B
Because I want to, like, stop making myself not have fun.
A
Like, but you're already doing so good without. Without drinking and having fun. Then you're so good.
B
Sometimes I think I, like, put myself so much in a box, I don't let loose ever.
A
Okay.
B
And then I'm like, maybe that's important. Yeah, maybe I need to, like, let loose sometimes. Like, let myself have. Because otherwise it's like I just, like, wake up every day and I work out and I, like, make my videos and I write my thing.
A
Yeah. Fun in life.
B
Like, you gotta have fun. Otherwise you look back and you go, did I not have fun? A day of my 20s? Like, that's kind of where I'm.
A
Oh, dude, I got. I got a whole sign. I'll. I'll. I'll give it to you. It's a. It's a quote about your 20s and how you're supposed to be. You're supposed to go nuts. Sure. It's a beautiful quote. I have it hanging in my room.
B
Love it.
A
Yeah.
B
You know what? Let's go fucking nuts.
A
Let's go fucking nuts. And if you at home are thinking about going nuts in your 20s, 30s, maybe 40s even.
B
Never stop.
A
There any teenagers here? I don't know. I'm not sure. I hope. I don't know.
B
Turn this off, go to bed.
A
Yeah, I used to hate though. I used to hate the adults when I was younger. That would be like, you're so young and dumb because you feel old. Yeah. Yeah. It's so stupid.
B
Well, one day you'll be us and then you'll know. But anyway. Yeah, but dry January for me. I'm like, this is kind of nice.
A
Because everyone's on my. On my level.
B
We're all hanging out, we're all playing cards together. Like, I'm like, let's go, let's watch a movie, go to bed.
A
Let's go. Oh, we are so different. It's funny.
B
Yeah, it's so good. That's okay.
A
The opposite to track. And that's what they say.
B
And I like that.
A
And I like that. And you know what? I also. What I. What I did find.
B
Oh, God, I'm sorry.
A
So this is a segment we call Disgraceful Receipts. We're gonna start with this one.
B
Okay, we'll start this one.
A
Ready, set, go.
B
That was my birthday party. That was like one of my first. I had a ballet themed birthday party. I was like obsessed with being a ballerina. I know. That was my childhood living room and my parents cleared out all of the furniture and hired like a ballerina like person, like dance with me and all my friends. And I was maybe like three or four.
A
That's like the best birthday party of all time.
B
It was the best. And I loved that costume. Look how pretty that is.
A
That is still. I stand by that.
B
That was so cute.
A
You should do a show in that one day.
B
I'll wear that today. I'll wear that to the Met gala if I am ever invited. Like, I love that outfit.
A
Oh my God.
B
It was like one. Those were. That was one of my like costumes that I would like wear all the time. I used to do like ballet glasses as a kid.
A
Oh my God.
B
Oh my God. Yeah. But then, okay, that was also the time in my life my hair wouldn't grow out. It was just short cuz it was curly. So it would just keep curling up to My head.
A
Oh, that's so cute. Girl, though. No.
B
Yeah, but I. Everyone thought I was a boy.
A
Oh.
B
And so it was really dramatic.
A
So these dresses were important, so I.
B
Went so far the other direction. I was like, I'm a girl. And I was like, my favorite color is pink, and I wore dresses, and I was like.
A
And I'm not just a girl. I'm a ballerina. You.
B
Yeah, exactly. I made, like, being a girl my.
A
Entire personality, and now you're trying to get rid of that. Is that what's going on?
B
And then something went really haywire in the middle there, and now I'm just hanging out, I guess.
A
She always loved leotards.
B
Okay.
A
Yeah.
B
So that was.
A
Wow.
B
Oh, my God. Should I go back or not? I should stop eating again. That was. Christ. Being a girl is awesome.
A
I suggest against.
B
Okay. Really? But look how.
A
Yeah, yeah. I'm not gonna tell you to stop eating.
B
No, I'm gonna. So that was me and my friend Sarah when we used to run a. Okay, Sorry. Know that's toxic. I'm gonna eat. And I think it's. I'm healthy and my brain works now, so don't worry about it.
A
Woke mob guys.
B
Woke. Woke Mom. Put your pitchforks down.
A
Okay. And pick up your fork.
B
And you know what? I have. Yeah.
A
And eat your.
B
And eat. And eat your carbs. Eat your proteins. Eat your vitamins. God. Anyway, that was. So I used to run the show called Disco Nap when I first started comedy, and.
A
Oh. Kind of like Harry Styles new album. What? Disco. Occasionally. Kiss all the time.
B
Oh, sure.
A
Yeah. Yeah.
B
We were on the same wavelength, me and him. So, yeah, we were trying to do, like, an 80s thing where we were, like, wearing leotards and, like, doing this photo shoot to do show promo.
A
That's awesome. Yeah, I like the vibe.
B
I stand by that. That was great.
A
That's great.
B
And look, I looked cute in that. You thought?
A
So for those of you listening, one more time, we want you to tune in on YouTube.
B
Okay. So this. I'm glad you brought this up. I'm glad you brought this up. So that was actually peak 2016. And that was. I was dressed. We all dressed up as social media applications at my whole floor my freshman year of college.
A
And you guys were all tight. Your whole floor?
B
Yeah, we had, like, a small floor, and so we. It was October. It was like, we didn't really know a lot of other people.
A
Oh, perfect.
B
And so we were like, all right, let's do a group costume. And we all did, like, social media things and mine was YouTube. And I wore a short skirt and dressed as YouTube also. You know what? I fucking stand by that. And my side part and my really long hair that looked like a carpet.
A
And she's always loved to dress up.
B
Oh, my God. This was the best thing I ever did. These are good. Making me happy.
A
There's a twinkle in your eye when you saw this. I loved it. This.
B
This was, like, the first time I really was, like, successful at something. So, you know, the Nightman Cometh. The For. Okay. It's always sunny in Philadelphia.
A
Okay.
B
They do this episode. It's like the best episode of comedy TV of all time called the Night Man Cometh.
A
Yes.
B
Okay. And they did. Okay. So me and my best friend, who's wearing the yellow Yell.
A
So we.
B
She and I were obsessed with this. We would always get high and watch it.
A
The Night Man.
B
Yeah.
A
Yes.
B
Day man. Fighter of the Night Man.
A
Jumping of the sun.
B
You know this? Yes, of course. Yeah. The best.
A
I thought it was Shakespeare when you first brought it up, because he said, come forth or something. No.
B
So, yeah, so we. In my college. This was senior year of college, we decided. Me and Yell, we were like, we love this so much. We're gonna put up a live action version of it.
A
That's awesome.
B
And so we did rehearsals. We cast it. We. She personally, like, built that. I was, like, not available. She did the whole back backdrop. She, like, painted it.
A
Oh.
B
And we had a one night only. One show.
A
Okay.
B
And it was so full that we had to turn people away because they couldn't fit in the room. It was a firehouse. Like, people up. And we just straight. We memorized it and we did like a basic. We didn't have it playing in the background, but it was like a shadow cast. We did it A. Like the physicality. Exactly. I played D. She did. She was Charlie.
A
That's awesome.
B
And we just did it exactly. And it was like 15 minutes because it's like a short. There's not like a lot that's so funny. But it was like. Yeah. It was so much fun. And I can't sing. And I did it anyway.
A
I love that.
B
And I. Yeah, it was great. I did that because D's. I was D. The D's song is Baby Boy, tiny boy I need you, want to make love to you boy. I think you should run this back. I would do it any day of the week. You know what idea we had that we never did? We also wanted to do the second greatest and almost equal in just a different way. Episode of Comedy Television of all time, I would say is the dinner party scene in the office. And I wanted to do a live action, immersive version of it where, like, people would come in and, like, watch the dinner party and then we as actors would, like, act it out. Exactly.
A
That's so funny.
B
We should do that.
A
You should do that. Yeah, I would. I would do that with you. That's hilarious.
B
Isn't that so funny?
A
That's so funny.
B
I wonder if, like, the Office would. I mean, that's the kind of thing you can do in college, cuz you just. It's like, you don't have to, like, get rights for stuff.
A
Yeah.
B
You know, kind of hard. You just kind of like, do it in a base and you're not charging tickets and.
A
Yeah, yeah, we can still have. We can come up four flights of.
B
Stairs, see if we can do a live action. Get the rights to a live action version of the dinner party episode.
A
Hey, guys. Crazy idea.
B
Yeah. Oh, God. Isn't that. Maybe I'm, like, burning that idea by saying it on a podcast, but I feel like it's.
A
You put it out there. You say put it out there.
B
Someone, Someone make it happen. Hit me up if you do it. And I will do it too. I'll be Jan. That's me and my dad's behind me. Yeah, that's me as a child. Nice to see you.
A
Dad's back in here. Yeah.
B
Me and my dad looked exactly. You can't see his head, but we had the same haircut at that time.
A
Really?
B
Yeah, he. He looked exactly like me. I was just baby him.
A
That's pretty funny.
B
Yeah, I guess we were at the beach. I don't really have a memory of that. I was really young.
A
Yeah. I mean, it doesn't look like you're really retaining a memory.
B
I like disassociating.
A
Oh, this is the first picture I ever disassociated.
B
Yeah.
A
Up next.
B
Okay, so this was one of my projects.
A
Yeah.
B
So that's yell again. We were really creative partners for a time. We were in the same sketch comedy group that was. We had this web series. One of the first things I ever did and created for the Internet, which is really not good.
A
Okay.
B
And I need you to know that.
A
You know, it's not always great.
B
It like, the first thing you do, you. You have to know it's gonna suck. We, in our souls, we were like, this is. Is our meal ticket. Like, we are really onto something, and you have to also believe that. But. So as part of the like, promo. We made this web series called Fun Moms. The web series. Our names were Stancy, Stacy, and Nancy.
A
Such mom names.
B
Yeah, exactly.
A
That is my mom's name.
B
And so it was like, us. There you go. So it was like, us, like, being like. Like moms, but, like, fun. And like, we're like empty nesters or our kids are at school. And, like, it's just like.
A
What?
B
It was just like shenanigans and hijinks. I know. We did one that was like a PTA meeting where we accidentally took edibles.
A
Oh, that's funny.
B
And we start, like. We were like, oh, you know Josh, he never cooks. He made these brownies and I was so proud of him. Anyway, I brought you one that sounds.
A
Like, funny or die or, like, college humor.
B
Totally. Yeah.
A
Yeah.
B
So we, like, did. That was like, an episode. We did Fun Mom. The first one was Fun Moms on a Jog. We even had a theme song. It was a Fun Moms on a Jog. We also did one. We also did one. Oh, Fun Mom's on a jog. We found a dead body.
A
Oh, wow.
B
Yeah, that was fun.
A
Well, it's funny because you do Fun Moms on a jog and then you. Then you wrote and made a. A show about Running club.
B
Yeah, Run club.
A
Yeah. Which is fantastic.
B
Which is.
A
You did that with Dan Carney. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah.
B
Did you come to the premiere either?
A
I don't think I would have had it.
B
You were invited.
A
Oh, thank you. I was out of town. I can't remember.
B
There's no way. Invited.
A
I think. No, I think I was. I was out of town.
B
Okay, cool. Yeah.
A
Thank you for the invite. I'm gonna go back.
B
Out. No, you were absolutely.
A
There's no. I think.
B
I think it was okay.
A
But it was a great show. I loved it.
B
Thank you. Thanks for watching it. Yeah, it was really fun to do. It was like a cool experiment and, like, writing more like. Like, plot narrative, like, slightly longer.
A
Yeah.
B
You know, like, instead of like a 60 second video, it's like, you know, a three to five, eight minute video. It's cool. Anyway, and then. Yeah, but the third episode of that was we filmed it in a pool, so the sound didn't work at all. But it was us learning how to synchronize swim and falling in love with our swim instructor. And then there was an elaborate synchronization synchronized swimming scene where we were you. That you worked out that we actually did.
A
Wow.
B
And it came out not that bad, but only due to editing.
A
Is it still online.
B
I need to ask you. L. I really hope not.
A
That would have been one of your scrubs. It sounds funny to me.
B
Yeah. I can't believe you.
A
Sounds like a first. I'm gonna guess this is Nantucket somewhere.
B
Yeah.
A
Nice.
B
Yeah, nice. I was the cocktail waitress on the boat.
A
Oh, hell yeah.
B
And it was really fun. And I was deeply sad. So I was. That was my binge eating era. My face is really puffy.
A
I see. You say binge eating era. I say having a blast.
B
Yeah. I had an eating disorder.
A
Bad.
B
That was. Yeah. But it was super fun. I was like. Yeah. I would do the boat on Tuesdays and Thursdays and there was. Captain Rob would take me in and out and we would. It was just like an hour. And you'd take the people to dinner across the bay and it like. And for most of the summer, you could watch the sunset.
A
Oh, cool.
B
These are all.
A
This is awesome.
B
You're taking me like a memory lane in, like, such a beautiful way, actually.
A
And this is one last one here. And the caption is laughing alone with salad 2. The rise of the apple.
B
Yeah.
A
So what the. Does that me.
B
Just out of cur. That was in London. I think that salad is a really powerful metaphor for femininity. And so I would. I often reference salad in my work.
A
Okay.
B
And the. A woman's reliance upon salad.
A
Yeah. If I don't have that, I don't breathe. I've noticed salad since. Who's to say? But yeah, women move that.
B
But it's like we're supposed to like, eat salad, you know? And it's like deprivation. And like.
A
I don't know.
B
It's eating disorder joke, but I like it. But yeah. So it was like. I think I maybe riffed on. I guess I had previously made a joke about women laughing alone with the salad. So this is me with me with an apple.
A
At least. Salad 2.
B
Rise of the Apple 3 coming real. You gotta understand, like, in the early Internet, this was incredible.
A
This is 2017. 17. That's not the early Internet. It's early.
B
You gotta understand. The Internet works.
A
It's early for you.
B
Early for me. I was people 143likes. Look at that.
A
That. Hey, that's not too shabby.
B
People loved that. People love that.
A
People. People are all in on this inside joke.
B
That's got to be like 20% of my followers at that time.
A
That's awesome.
B
That's. That's everybody I knew.
A
That's those.
B
Everybody I knew like that then.
A
And. And don't you dare Forget them.
B
I don't. I mean, I. I have no idea who they are, but. Yeah, that was study abroad, and I was at the. That's actually Shakespeare's birthplace was Stratford upon Avon.
A
Oh, shit.
B
Yeah. That's why I was there. And I guess we went to an apple orchard and I was holding an apple, and I was like, this is a weird photo. I guess I'll comment something funny.
A
This is great. This is. This is. This is you.
B
This is the real me. I stand by that.
A
I said, I mean, dude, stand by.
B
What do you think's funny about it?
A
What? What?
B
Yeah, why do you think it's so funny?
A
I didn't. I didn't pull these.
B
All right. And what do you guys.
A
And I hate that it's the last one because I have nothing to pivot from. And I just want to really say that.
B
And actually, you know what? And thank you for just letting me go through my old photos. Like, thank you.
A
I think, personally, I'm gonna speak for my sister here, because that's who finds all this.
B
Yeah, Nora. What the.
A
I think what she was doing here was just. Because she left the caption up. See, other. Other ones didn't have a caption. Oh.
B
So I think I'm just trying to.
A
Get to the bottom of. Yeah. What that caption, man. Now we get. Now we get it. Now we know.
B
That was when I. That was when I figured out trying to make jokes. That was an early time in my life.
A
And it has 100 and 143 likes. 143. I love you. Okay. Thank you so much for coming. It's been a pleasure. You could use this time to shout out whoever you want right into this camera right here, rapid fire style. Shout out anybody and tell them where to find you and what you got going on.
B
I'd like to thank my friends and my family, you know who you are, and everyone that got me to this moment. No, if you want to.
A
Guys.
B
If you guys want to see me on tour and do stand up. Stand up comedy. Stand up comedy. You just see me do stand up comedy. You should. I'm doing a bi weekly show in New York City starting at the end of January and then until the end of time at Sesh Comedy Club. And then also I'm going to be in Chicago, Nashville and Los Angeles and February.
A
Hell yeah. Do yeah.
B
So check out my website, eyvette Sean.com and also at Eyvette Sean on Instagram and Yevit on Tik Tok and. And my podcast friend Crush podcast.
A
Thank you so much. Thanks for coming on. All of a sudden I'm a host. Thank you so much. Appreciate you coming on. It has been a pleasure. No, truly and honestly, I love a mandatory hanging.
B
Hi, I'm Angie Hicks, co founder of Angie. When you use Angie for your home.
A
Projects, you know all your jobs will.
B
Be done well, from roof repair to emergency plumbing and more done well. So the next time you have a home project, leave it to the pros. Get started@angie.com start your year with healthy restful sleep from Ashley. Our New Year's Mattress sale makes it easy with Ashley Sleep mattresses starting at only only $2.49 plus take advantage of 60 month special financing on in store purchases made with your Ashley Advantage Synchrony credit card. That's a Tempur Pedic Adapt Queen Mattress Starting at $37 a month, upgrade to a mattress that supports your best nights and energizes your day. Visit your local Ashley store or visit Ashley.com to shop. More New Year's Mattress deals subject to credit approval. Minimum monthly payments required. See store for details.
Date: January 22, 2026
Host: Grace O’Malley (Unwell) | Guest: Yvette Segan
This lively and warm episode of Disgraceful is a comedic deep-dive into the lives, quirks, and career trajectories of two young, NYC-based comedians—Grace O’Malley and the ever-charming Yvette Segan. Framed as an “audition” for future co-hosts, the conversation dances between playful banter, earnest takes on women’s experiences in comedy and life, reflections on growing up, and gleeful dissection of culture, language, and their own embarrassing and endearing histories. With Grace’s sister Nora chiming in from the background, the hour is packed with bits, memories, and raw laughs—living up to the “comedy podcast for crying out loud!” promise.
Freewheeling but intimate—wildly funny, occasionally raw, and deeply relatable. Grace and Yvette balance silly-sharp observational bits (minj, salad, “male butt celebration”) with genuine personal confessions. Irreverent, feminist, cathartic, and bursting with the energy of two friends who can make each other cry-laugh while still holding space for vulnerability.
Disgraceful with Grace O’Malley — weekly doses of chaos, catharsis, and comedy gold. Don’t miss Yvette’s “Friend Crush” podcast, and check both their socials for upcoming shows and more existential riffs.