
NYU graduate and Universal Hogwarts dancer reject Dylan Adler joins Grace in LA. Dylan discusses being a gay twin, musical comedy and piss parties. They also compare the NYC and LA dating scenes and walking pace. Have a great day, much love, and enjoy the show! Get tour tickets here: https://graceomalleycomedy.com FOLLOW DYLAN: https://www.instagram.com/dylanadler_/?hl=en https://www.youtube.com/@dylanadlercomedy https://www.tiktok.com/@dylanadler7
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Advertiser/Host
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Interviewer/Host
Okay, mom, for my dorm, I'm thinking Coquette meets Poet Core. That sounds like a vibe.
Advertiser/Host
What do you need and where do we get it?
Interviewer/Host
Target. I already have everything on my mood board. A comforter, pillows, and a super cute floral lamp.
Advertiser/Host
So you probably need a rug to
Interviewer/Host
tie it all together. Omg. They have the perfect CMPC rug. Cmpc Coquette meets Poet Core. Oh, okay. In that case, let's rtt. Yeah, let's run to Target. You're getting it. Find your dorm inspiration and everything you need at Target. My. The studio we have in New York is. It was supposed to be like 70s theme. I had like a. Like a desk and everything. And I was trying to be like Johnny Carson style kind of. And then I found out very quickly that I'm. I can't read. So like the whole, like, full on interview without any banter, that didn't.
Dylan Adler
That didn't work.
Interviewer/Host
So I'd rather just like do it.
Dylan Adler
I'm also not.
Interviewer/Host
Everything all right. Just leaned on. Sorry. Oh, it's all right. Crazy.
Dylan Adler
Oh, you're so good.
Interviewer/Host
I was checking the camera in my head. Johnny.
Dylan Adler
Johnny Carson is the.
Interviewer/Host
The ghost. The Johnny Carson live in studio. Are you with us?
Dylan Adler
It's me, Johnny Carson. Welcome to the studio. I'm here with.
Interviewer/Host
I have full body chills.
Dylan Adler
Incredible grace, man.
Interviewer/Host
Literally. Okay. So super stoked to have you. Thank you so much.
Dylan Adler
So excited to be here. Thank you for having me.
Interviewer/Host
So awesome. And I think we're rolling. So let's get this. Let's do it, let's get it. Welcome in.
Dylan Adler
Thank you for having me.
Interviewer/Host
Should I be serious for the whole interview?
Dylan Adler
I think yeah. This is like an actor's round table.
Interviewer/Host
And speaking of which, I. I'm going to. I'm going to say a few names, phrases, words, and you tell me what you think when I say these things.
Dylan Adler
Perfect.
Interviewer/Host
All right, let's start off with all capital letters is what they're written on. Betty White, Liza Minnelli, and Hugh Jackman.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And now we're off to a hot start. Let's get it.
Dylan Adler
And now we're rolling. Yes.
Interviewer/Host
Artiste at club.
Dylan Adler
Coming, faggot.
Interviewer/Host
Let's see if we can go for a hat trick.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Universal Studios.
Dylan Adler
Best backflip. Oh, faggot.
Interviewer/Host
And a sweet, cute, brave smart by your crush.
Dylan Adler
By. Can you say that one again?
Interviewer/Host
Oh, yes, of course. Now that's a sweet, cute, brave smart by your crush. Thank you very much. That. That's been a segment I can't call. Moving on. Okay, so you have a Comedy Central Comedy. You did Comedy Central?
Dylan Adler
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And it's titled there's so Much Drama in My Life. My question to you is, what is the current drama that's plaguing your life?
Dylan Adler
Oh, God. The current drama plaguing my life, I think. You know, I wouldn't say so much drama, but it's just, you know, seeing so, you know, dating. Seeing guys. And it's just some. Some of them are freaking wild cards.
Interviewer/Host
Okay, so several questions come to mind after hearing that you used to live in New York.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
You've changed.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
You're in LA now.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And what's better, New York or la? Dating scene.
Dylan Adler
You know what? New York. Because there's guys in different industries and fields. Like, what about. About la? It's like, I don't want to always just date another freaking actor or like someone else who's business. It's nice. Like when my first boyfriend was a chef.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, that's good.
Dylan Adler
Nice. It's like people from Diff. Do do different things and that's still an art. Yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So they're able to be creative.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
But in a different way where you're. It's not a competition.
Dylan Adler
Exactly, Exactly. That's right. That's right.
Interviewer/Host
That's right. And then. So what's like, the craziest thing that's happened to you on a date?
Dylan Adler
Okay, well, there was one. Okay. One date I was like, after. Well, so what I say is, like, I'm. I'm seeing this. I was seeing this person who's, like, very hot. But so because of that, I'm kind of blowing past many, many red flags.
Interviewer/Host
As we do.
Dylan Adler
As we do. Like, I feel like a competitive downhill skier. Just kind of like, you know, just
Interviewer/Host
got a bob and weave.
Dylan Adler
Nope, didn't see that. Didn't see that.
Interviewer/Host
Breaking legs just to go out.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. But one thing I saw that was truly insane was there's a. I don't know if I should say. But okay, this guy went to a Meet and greet for Paula Deen.
Interviewer/Host
Pre or post knowledge?
Dylan Adler
Post.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, rats. Oh, ratsola.
Dylan Adler
This was a month ago.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, no, that's not great. I didn't know she could do that.
Dylan Adler
And literally sang to Paula Deen like, I love you, Paula Deen. Posted it on Instamate. I was. I was like, okay.
Interviewer/Host
Kind of funny, kind of insane kind of funny.
Dylan Adler
I was like, well, is it ironic?
Guest/Additional Speaker
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
No, it has to be ironic, right? Or no.
Dylan Adler
I don't know.
Interviewer/Host
So is this. Is this a man from the south that can't. Can't get away from his ways?
Dylan Adler
Well, from Ventura county, so sort of. Sort of the South.
Interviewer/Host
Now. What's that area?
Dylan Adler
That's a little north of la. Oh, gotcha.
Interviewer/Host
Okay, so that's a little bit of. Is that where them Euphoria kids from?
Dylan Adler
Oh, wait. Oh, maybe I didn't watch Euphoria. Oh, you know, I need to watch it.
Interviewer/Host
No, you know what? Screw. It's too late. Their heart's not in it this season.
Dylan Adler
It doesn't matter.
Interviewer/Host
It doesn't matter. Truly and honestly. So. So they went up to Paul, went
Advertiser/Host
to a meet and greet.
Interviewer/Host
Paid.
Dylan Adler
Paid. Yeah, Paid money. And so I think that was like. You know what? I think maybe we should just.
Interviewer/Host
You know, that's the straw that breaks the racist back.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
I think that you're gonna have to.
Dylan Adler
As they say. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I would. I would bake her. I would go. I would probably do. I probably do, like, the. The help kind of deal. I get a ticket and make a beautiful pie for her, and then she eats it. This is damn good. Wow, this is really delicious. The whole. Eat my, Eat my.
Dylan Adler
It's great.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. I think that's how I would.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
If I had to.
Dylan Adler
I wish he did that.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. No, he just sang her praises.
Dylan Adler
I just sang.
Interviewer/Host
Literally saying. Literally sang her praises.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
That's when you have to go.
Dylan Adler
I know. I think that's when you have a
Interviewer/Host
lot to think about.
Dylan Adler
I have a lot to think about.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. That's a. That's a. That's a tough way to move on.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
But it makes things easy.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
To just say goodbye.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
It leaves a lot in the crossfires of you just sitting alone, being like,
Dylan Adler
who was that man? Just being like, what was that? What happened?
Interviewer/Host
How did I get here?
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
Sorry for your troubles.
Dylan Adler
Thank you. Thank you for acknowledging.
Interviewer/Host
So we kind of talked about it right before we started recording. But you had your show with Emily Wilson last night.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
How was it?
Dylan Adler
It was so much fun. I Love, Emily. It was like. We're both, like, musical comedians, so we just kind of, like. I think our energies kind of were matching and.
Interviewer/Host
Which I am in full awe of. Anytime I see musical comedy, I adore it so much. I get this, like, that feeling of, like, when you're at the theater and I don't know if you get this, but, like, sometimes when people are singing, I get, like, goosebumps and almost cry kind thing. And when it comes to comedy, I'm like, this is so confusing because it's beautiful. Voices singing, funny jokes, and I. I'm like, laugh. Crying. It's like a whole mix of. It's a great emotion.
Dylan Adler
That is the nicest thing I think someone has ever said about musical comedy.
Interviewer/Host
Why does this get such a bad rap?
Dylan Adler
Because it is known as a art form, but it's.
Interviewer/Host
But it's not. I think it's so clever.
Dylan Adler
Thank you so much.
Interviewer/Host
And every time I see it, I tell my sister I want to do it, and she goes, you cannot sing. Stop it.
Dylan Adler
You don't have to sing.
Interviewer/Host
Well, I've seen some of that. There's definitely some of that.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
There are some people who can't sing, but, you know, if you could write a song, why can't you just sing it even though you don't have a key, you know?
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Or it could just be like, you know, like, Meg Salter just released. Like, she just. It's like talking through it, so.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God. And, I mean, she. She's the. The actual queen, I think.
Guest/Additional Speaker
The.
Dylan Adler
So funny.
Interviewer/Host
I thought that was awesome that she had a meeting. A lookalike contest.
Dylan Adler
A lookalike contest.
Interviewer/Host
And who's to say? Planned it or not exactly, but. And then she dropped. She came in and sang her first new single.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
I'm a singer now.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. Which is good, because now I think I might be able to get her sloppy second roles. She doesn't want to act.
Dylan Adler
That's what I hope. With Bowen Yang and Joel Kim Booster, I'm like, hey, if you're too busy, I'm here.
Interviewer/Host
I'm looking for your downfall I'm looking
Dylan Adler
for your sloppy thirds.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. It's like. It's just somewhere down the line it'll come, you know, what's meant to be will be.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
Okay, so. Oh, speaking of which, you've got rap singing songs in your special.
Dylan Adler
Huh?
Interviewer/Host
Very good. Very great.
Dylan Adler
Thank you.
Interviewer/Host
Who's the greatest rapper alive? Oh, dead or yet to be born?
Dylan Adler
The greatest rapper alive. I can't.
Interviewer/Host
No, it's Hard to bob and weave. Who's not problematic.
Dylan Adler
I know. Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
I know.
Guest/Additional Speaker
I understand.
Interviewer/Host
Rest in peace.
Dylan Adler
You know what Megan the Stallion is. Her flow is incredible. And I love that Megan loves anime and like, Oku wat. I like. I love. I love that she's a. I will
Interviewer/Host
be your backup dancer. I'm obsessed for it.
Dylan Adler
I'm like, girl music video if you need someone.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, you know, joking. Booster's not around. You said it first was okay. Okay, let's move on. So you do physical comedy as well?
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
My favorite video of all time from you is Universal.
Dylan Adler
Thank you.
Interviewer/Host
Universal, right?
Dylan Adler
Yes, Universal Studios.
Interviewer/Host
The. The concept there is. Did you really audition to be one of those soldiers?
Dylan Adler
No. So. So I was with a sketch group named Staple View at the time, and we were just, like, out there filming content and were like. I was like, you know what? I think maybe, like, film. I was like, oh, okay, maybe just film me. And then, you know, and then I was coming up with that. We. We got the footage and I was like, you know, maybe it might be a funny scenario if it's like, the captions. Like, I was a backup dancer.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
And I didn't get the part, and I'm better. So I'll show. Show those. I will show Hogwarts dancers. So I posted it, and at first it was like. People were like, oh, so silly. Oh, so silly. And then. And then it started being like this fucking pretentious bitch.
Interviewer/Host
See, this is when it gets into the wrong hands.
Dylan Adler
For sure.
Interviewer/Host
And that's the thing about the Internet. It's like every thing is done with a good intention. And then somehow it gets warped, you know, like. Paula. I'm just kidding.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, for sure. And it got so. It got so, like, the India Express was like, dancer rejected from the Indian Express. Wow. The only publication I read a global,
Interviewer/Host
worldwide superstar is what you are. I mean, that's. That's all that says to me.
Dylan Adler
No, but literally, for a whole month, my DMs were like, clown, faggot, faggot, faggot, clown, faggot, faggot, clown. And I was like, you think I'm a clown? I'm like, you think I'm funny. So you agree I'm a gay comedian is what you're saying.
Interviewer/Host
See me for what I am. Yeah, it's kind of a beautiful thing, honestly.
Dylan Adler
Thank you.
Interviewer/Host
It's. What's, like, the craziest DM you've ever gotten? It's. It's hard to pinpoint.
Dylan Adler
Oh, my God. Okay. One of them was. Was I. We are a lesbian couple and we want your sperm for our baby.
Interviewer/Host
And the thing about lesbians, they're very blunt and direct.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
So they just got right to it.
Dylan Adler
They got right to it.
Interviewer/Host
Say, like, huge fan. Love your videos. I think you're so handsome. They just were like, yeah, we need a baby and it needs to be yours.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And I respect that.
Dylan Adler
And I respect that they didn't waste your time. I was like, you know what, lesbians? I love you. Thank you for this. I don't think you want this jelly. I don't think. I don't think you want this psychosis, this psychotic sperm that you might get.
Interviewer/Host
And then it might be a double psychotic sperm.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
It runs in your family as a twin.
Dylan Adler
Oh, for sure.
Interviewer/Host
I'd say.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So they have to watch out for. They think they're getting a one for. They're getting a twofer.
Dylan Adler
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And so you and your brother do most. Most hilarious videos together.
Dylan Adler
Thank you. Thank you.
Interviewer/Host
We were just talking offline about how your brother is now doing stand up.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
Or comedy. What's his niche?
Dylan Adler
His niche is bad. No, just kidding. He does his hack. His hack is his niche. No, just kidding.
Interviewer/Host
They made a show about him.
Dylan Adler
I know. Yes. Yeah. Deborah Vance is about.
Guest/Additional Speaker
He.
Dylan Adler
So basically, like, he started like two years ago like his men. He was like, well, if this bitch can do it, I can. I guess so he lives in Tucson. He started doing open mics there in the scene. And so that's kind of what he's doing.
Interviewer/Host
And you're not allowing him to come into your space of L. A.
Dylan Adler
You know what I do? You know, I've learned to embrace it. At this point, I'm like, you know what? I've tried my best to stop him. I've spread allegations about him.
Interviewer/Host
You gotta do what you gotta do.
Dylan Adler
I gotta do what you gotta do. But no, at this point, I'm like, you know what? He likes it and that's fine. And I.
Interviewer/Host
You have a big problem with it. It's all.
Dylan Adler
Big problem with it.
Interviewer/Host
This is great.
Dylan Adler
I like it and it's fine. I actually did shows.
Interviewer/Host
That's what most, like, parents say about their kid being gay.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, I like it. You know, it's just not natural to do comedy after your twin does it. It's just.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, yeah, everything's the same. He needs to get his own little. His chick.
Dylan Adler
That's what I'm saying. Who's my brother.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, I thought you could have had the Upper hand there.
Dylan Adler
I know.
Interviewer/Host
Well, who came out first?
Dylan Adler
My brother. Yeah. Could you imagine? I'm like, no, I'm addicted to. I can't stop. It's a problem.
Interviewer/Host
A real munch.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Hydroclitz, girls.
Interviewer/Host
And I'm sorry, I also assumed your brother's gay, but there's a rainbow flag. Okay, thank you. I was using context clues.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he's great.
Interviewer/Host
Unless he was just doing a really good impression of his little bro, you know?
Dylan Adler
Yeah, no, he's just, like, good ally. No, he's. That he's very gay. And so I'm. I am like. Because, like, we just. I did a. Performed in Tokyo for the first time.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, when you were out there?
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
With your family. You did a show?
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God, it's so cool.
Dylan Adler
It was so fun at the Tokyo.
Interviewer/Host
You're joking around about international superstar, but you really are. Wow.
Dylan Adler
Very minor global. But we did at the Tokyo Comedy Bar. So fun that.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, just the shirt alone. I want to go there.
Dylan Adler
It's. If you're ever in Tokyo, let me know.
Interviewer/Host
I'll have to really look ahead.
Dylan Adler
Okay. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And do some planning. Save up.
Dylan Adler
Absolutely.
Interviewer/Host
But that's so awesome. So what's the vibe at the Tokyo Comedy Bar?
Dylan Adler
Yeah, it was great. And my brother opened for me. He did like, five minutes.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, that's awesome. All you can take.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, that's all I can bear, actually. I honestly, like, they were laughing and I was like, okay, don't get too loud. Don't get too loud. Okay. They stopped.
Interviewer/Host
Bomb. I hope he bombed your mom's like, come on.
Dylan Adler
I literally have nightmares that my brother will go on before me and kill stealing my material. And I go on, and I'm like, I don't know what to say, you guys. He stole everything I was gonna do tonight. They're like, boo, we hate you.
Interviewer/Host
There's a potential chance.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, if. If I were him. That is the way to move.
Dylan Adler
That's the way to go.
Interviewer/Host
Because who are you going to believe for sure?
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, it's tricky.
Dylan Adler
It's tricky.
Interviewer/Host
The two faces looking at you are identical.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
And it's hard to tell who's fibbing.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Exactly. They might not even be able to tell the difference, honestly.
Interviewer/Host
So. That would be screwy.
Dylan Adler
That would be screwy.
Interviewer/Host
That would be screwing. I mean, especially since you are the star.
Dylan Adler
Thank you.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, I mean, you know, star shine. Br.
Dylan Adler
Fast.
Advertiser/Host
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Interviewer/Host
Your home should show off who you are. And Ashley has styles that balance timeless appeal and modern trends to bring your personal look home. The eye catching designs of Ashley's pieces is one thing, but they're also made with features like stain resistant performance fabrics that are incredibly durable, easy to clean and stain resistant with machine washable cushion covers. So not only do their pieces look great in your home, they function well in your life too. I'll tell you, you gotta check out this Alyssa Court collection that they have. It is so beautiful, it is so timeless. It's an absolute perfect piece for your home. If you're looking to furnish your house, Ashley has you covered. So I gotta tell you, Ashley provides fast, reliable white glove delivery right to your room of choice. Well crafted, affordable and built to stand up to real life. How furniture should be. So visit your local Ashley store or head to Ashley.com to find your style. Oh, one of the questions we had here was have you or your brother ever liked the same guy?
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
Is that why you're so bitter towards
Dylan Adler
him and his girl? No. I love my brother.
Interviewer/Host
I know every angle I put on you is brutal.
Dylan Adler
No, he is my best friend and we call each other every day and he, we have like the same guy. Before we had like on Tinder. Sometimes we would match with the same guy and if that happened, we'd be like, okay, who matched with them first? Or we'd be like, okay, whose type is this more?
Interviewer/Host
That's a good way to go about it. And that's like, to really sit down and be like, well, let's look at the facts.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. That's good.
Interviewer/Host
Rather than just fight and hope for the best.
Dylan Adler
For sure.
Interviewer/Host
Or both go out with the guy.
Dylan Adler
For sure.
Interviewer/Host
Have you done the. The good old fashioned, like, Disney Channel switcheroo? Yeah.
Dylan Adler
We were actually too goody two shoes to even do that. We were like, this will go on our permanent record.
Interviewer/Host
Going to jail.
Dylan Adler
I. Exactly. This is like fourth grade. We're like, we're going to get arrested.
Interviewer/Host
This. Screw us forever. No college for us.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Did you go to college?
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Where'd you go?
Dylan Adler
Nyu.
Interviewer/Host
Oh,
Dylan Adler
and I'm so sorry.
Interviewer/Host
And that's why you shine so bright.
Dylan Adler
No, no. I'm so sorry. And it deserves every bit of dragging it gets.
Guest/Additional Speaker
No, the. The. The.
Interviewer/Host
The drag I'm doing is more of a jealous. Is it jealousy? Yeah. I was in community college. I didn't. I wasn't that bright, right?
Dylan Adler
No. No, no, no. Correct.
Interviewer/Host
Yes.
Dylan Adler
No. Half. Half of the kids I met at NYU was like, what, the 1.59 GPA graduating? You're smart in different ways. Intelligence isn't. Is a spectrum.
Guest/Additional Speaker
No.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, I'd say so. I'm. I'm on the. The street spectrum.
Dylan Adler
Yes, you're street smart.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. Except I think that's going out the window now too, so. That's true. I gotta play like, mind games or something.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, I'm.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, I'm kind of screwed in that department. Speaking of dating and all that jazz, you've made content about your Grindr hookups. And so I know I asked like, what the worst date you had, but what's like, the worst hookup story you have? Oh, God, if you're willing to go there.
Dylan Adler
For sure. Okay, so the word.
Interviewer/Host
Thank you so much for your courage and bravery.
Dylan Adler
Where do I begin? I think my worst hookup might be. Well, it was this guy who we matched on Tinder and we went on a date, and he was super into, like, Japanese culture. He was like a white gay guy. And we were like, kind of like, he would sometimes randomly just like, speak to me in Japanese, and I didn't really know how to respond. And then he, like, he was like, let's. Let's watch this anime. And then we watch this anime. I don't know what it. What it's saying. There are no subtitles. And it's all In Japanese.
Interviewer/Host
That's how he's learning.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, I think. And he's fluent.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, wow.
Dylan Adler
And he's fluent. He's very into the culture. And then I go to his place to hook up. It's bonsai anime everywhere. And then he, he was like, I have this samurai hat. Do you want to put it on?
Interviewer/Host
Samurai hat.
Dylan Adler
Samurai hat.
Interviewer/Host
All right.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. And so I was like, okay. I put it on. So these many red flags I'm blowing past because I'm horny.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. Yeah. I'm see, I'm see where, where this is going and where his mind's at.
Dylan Adler
And so then as I'm, you know him, he sounds like an anime hentai.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, wow.
Dylan Adler
He's like, you know, making those sounds and everything.
Interviewer/Host
This is like a real fantasy of his.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, real. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, goodness gracious. How do you. How do you lure you in?
Dylan Adler
With my own. With horniness.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Well, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
It always leads with that.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Ends with damn.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. It ends with. Yeah. So that was probably the maybe weirdest hookup I had.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Guest/Additional Speaker
That's crazy.
Interviewer/Host
And that's like fetishizing.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, yeah, yeah. A little bit of a fetish.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
But you know, honestly, afterwards I got sprinkles cupcakes and.
Interviewer/Host
Did he get it for you?
Dylan Adler
No, I got it for myself.
Interviewer/Host
You needed to give your little self relax.
Dylan Adler
I was like, I need to treat myself. I really put. I really went through it. And so I. I had a sprinkles cupcake, you know, was great.
Interviewer/Host
On the walk home.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Wow. And this is the time before sprinkles cupcakes were in vending machines.
Dylan Adler
Maybe I did the vending machine.
Interviewer/Host
You did the vending machine?
Dylan Adler
I did the vending machine. Cuz you didn't.
Interviewer/Host
You didn't really feel like talking to many people after.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, I was like, let's just go
Interviewer/Host
right to the right to the source.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
I just like might as well play a crane game.
Dylan Adler
That's exactly. That's what I'm saying.
Interviewer/Host
Imagine you play crane game to get your cake that be so up. I would be so starving.
Dylan Adler
I would be so pissed.
Interviewer/Host
Being high as hell. Being like, dude, come on. I know this is ridiculous.
Dylan Adler
I know. And it's a treat. I actually really want more than an animal or anything. That's torture.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
To think about.
Interviewer/Host
So your. Your show, roomies.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So in la, every week is self described as weird and queerd.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
On the promotional flyer, that's what it says.
Dylan Adler
Absolutely weird. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Are you feeling more weird or queered today.
Dylan Adler
I'm feeling weird as now.
Interviewer/Host
What's all weird about you? You know, this damn festival.
Dylan Adler
Oh, God. It's right. This freaking festival because it's, you know, go. And yesterday was like the show and we were like. Me and Em were like, kind of like stressing about the show all day, so we were like, kind of like running back and forth and dealing with some tech stuff. And then in the room, everyone in the green room in the show before was like, kind of smoking and getting like hot boxing the room. So when it was our room, we like, were like, I'm like, such a lightweight with weed. I'm like, me too. I'm like, I swear I'm feeling a little. Yeah, bananas.
Interviewer/Host
I can't. I. I'll get second hand high. I really will.
Dylan Adler
Me too.
Interviewer/Host
I can't do weed. I. I just can't.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Uppers only kind of gal. And I tell people that, which is kind of insane. It's like, do you smoke weed? No, Uppers only. All right, relax.
Dylan Adler
I can't do weed, but heroin. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. No, I'm just. I'm gonna do the hard stuff.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I just want you to know I' not like a. They're like, all right.
Advertiser/Host
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I just wanted to know if you wanted to hit.
Dylan Adler
Relax. Yeah. But I will be calling the cops right now.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, you. You. I am a narc, and you're under arrest. I'm very good at undercover.
Dylan Adler
No, but I get very. Yeah. Very easily. So I was like. So feel a little wonky. Feeling a little wonky. And I love seeing all, like, friends and talking to people, which is so fun. But I am this very feeling. Feeling cuckoo.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, that'll. That, yeah, that'll screw you all up. But it didn't affect the performance.
Dylan Adler
Honestly, it did a little bit. But it was so honest. It did. It was like, you know, I. I lost my place. But honestly, the whole show is, like, chaotic. So honest. It kind of. I don't mind when things go off the rails because sometimes that's like a comedic moments.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. And. Yeah, you're that damn good. It doesn't matter.
Dylan Adler
And sometimes. Do you ever find, like, when. Sometimes I'm like, oh, I wish something unexpected would happen because sometimes I'm doing my material, I'm like, ah, the crowd is good. They're like. And then like, something. And then they're. And you're like, whoa. And like, just recording with that gets the audience more on board.
Interviewer/Host
And then everyone feels a part of something bigger than what we're already here. To see. Yeah, it is fun.
Dylan Adler
It's like we're all in the moment for this freaking music stand that fell and hit your ass.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Literally, something. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I'm like, I'm in. I'm in Oklahoma a couple weeks ago. I. I'm finding out what tornadoes are. I'm like, I'm kind of hope one would come through. As long as everyone stays safe, you know what I mean? I think that would be kind of.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
To live through a tornado while on stage.
Dylan Adler
Wow. You're still like, hey, so how. How long.
Interviewer/Host
Hey, y' all come here a lot. Y' all used to this? So where did. Where did you grow up?
Dylan Adler
I grew up in the Bay Area. By the way, I said the music stand hitting my ass because that happened last night.
Interviewer/Host
What's thinking on your ass?
Dylan Adler
A music stand hit my ass.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, that really happened.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. It was a whole mess.
Interviewer/Host
And so music stand. Now that's where you put sheets, paper.
Dylan Adler
Yes, I put a sheet of paper to, like, for my set list, and it accidentally. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, and did you get hurted?
Dylan Adler
No.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, that's good. That's good. I'll probably. They probably thought it was part of the show.
Dylan Adler
Maybe they did.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
So slapstick.
Interviewer/Host
They sure do love a pretend earthquake.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And then. So this. This week is. So the festival we're talking about is. This will air, like, a little bit later, but it's. Netflix is a joke, and so there's a lot going on. Have you been bopping around, partying and seeing old friends you haven't seen in a while? What's been going on with you?
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Bopping around, seeing friends, like, and, like, seeing friends that I came up with and started with, like, you know, like, people who. It's like we're kind of, like, moving. Like, we saw each other at the dingy open mics. Yeah. And then we see each other at, like, the show bar shows we do, and then we see each other at, like, the clubs. And then, you know, it's like, it's nice to see people.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. Especially because, like, once you've been doing it well, everyone kind of starts going their separate ways, doing their own thing kind of thing. You don't get to see them as much, I feel like.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, for sure.
Interviewer/Host
And how long. How long you been in the game?
Dylan Adler
Nine years. Wow. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
You started in New York? New York, nyu. What was your. What was your plan?
Dylan Adler
Okay. I was a music composition major.
Interviewer/Host
Hell, yeah. So you're doing the plan.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, kind of a little bit.
Interviewer/Host
Yes.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Yes.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, Maybe not in the way that, like, it was like, nothing goes the way you actually, like, fully plan.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
There is a variation where it's like you're kind of living your dream a little bit. Yeah.
Dylan Adler
I mean, like, I'm happy I get to use my degree in some way.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
And, you know, I still love musical theater so much, so. Definitely. Like, I talk about it a lot.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
But yeah, I. I feel like, yeah, music composition was kind of helpful and at least like. Kind of like when it comes to, like, the muscle of, like, trying to write and creative and like, see, you know, trying to it in. In that process.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. And so that's good. You know, money not gone to waste.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
That's huge. That's very important part.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
Very important part of that. I. I think it's important in a. In a young child's life, the first thing they saw that made them want to do what you do now wasn't for you.
Dylan Adler
Raven Simone.
Interviewer/Host
Hell yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Hell yeah.
Dylan Adler
That was my girl.
Interviewer/Host
That is awesome.
Dylan Adler
She. Her physical comedy, her commitment to the characters, they were like, so larger than life. And she's such a master, so talented, so good. And. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Raven Simone.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Have you had a chance to run around with her before?
Dylan Adler
Oh, my God, no. But if I met her, I think I would. I don't know what would happen.
Interviewer/Host
Would that be your. Your biggest starstruck person?
Dylan Adler
To me, probably.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Probably. Raven Simone.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, I think. I think you should try and get on that pod. I think you guys would really shoot.
Dylan Adler
Oh, my God. That's right.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, she is. I don't know. I love her so much.
Interviewer/Host
She rocks.
Dylan Adler
She rocks.
Interviewer/Host
She really does. The wife, who's to say? But a lot of people don't seem to really be keen on her. And then what's like your. What's your favorite musical?
Dylan Adler
I love Hamilton so much. I love Lin Manuel Miranda.
Interviewer/Host
I've yet to see it.
Dylan Adler
It's on Disney plus. Oh, yeah.
Guest/Additional Speaker
But what about.
Interviewer/Host
What about supporting live theater?
Dylan Adler
Oh, and you can also see it live in New York City, the greatest city in the world that you left. Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.
Interviewer/Host
What made you do the move?
Dylan Adler
I got a job writing for James Corden Sick. And so that brought me out to,
Interviewer/Host
like, spat on you.
Advertiser/Host
I'm just kidding.
Interviewer/Host
Just kidding.
Dylan Adler
He was act. He was. Is so great to work with.
Interviewer/Host
That's what everyone says. Like, everyone I've met that has worked with him say they don't have a bad thing.
Dylan Adler
I love him. Yeah, he's great.
Interviewer/Host
That's great. That's really good. He just had one bad time at a restaurant.
Dylan Adler
I know.
Interviewer/Host
You know?
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I was gonna say we've all been there, but I would never in my life be mean at a restaurant. Somewhere else maybe, but a restaurant. Nope. I've worked in the service industry.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I would not do that.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
You know, Europeans are different.
Advertiser/Host
Different.
Interviewer/Host
They're just a little bit of a different breed. This is your old employer. You don't want to talk about this. Don't burn those bridges. So recently you said you're trying to wean off the white peen.
Dylan Adler
Wean up the white peen further. Wean up the white peen. Trying to wean a wean off the white peen. Wean off the white peen. Yes. So what that means is it's pretty, you know, self explanatory. I'm trying to prioritize POC peen over white peen and something SNL's not. I mean, let's talk about it. I mean, come on. Yeah,
Interviewer/Host
I also. That is not my former employer. That's my hope to. Hope to be future employer maybe one day. So I better shut the hell up too. All these things will bite you in the ass, kids. So, yeah, you reading off the white
Dylan Adler
peen, Weaning off the white Pain.
Interviewer/Host
I understand your track history. I mean, I can only imagine that. Paula Dean's biggest fan. Yeah. Big old whitey.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So, I mean, Samurai guy.
Dylan Adler
Oh, yeah. Samurai guy. White.
Interviewer/Host
But, you know, tough track record that.
Dylan Adler
Tough track record.
Interviewer/Host
I understand the weaning.
Dylan Adler
So weaning. But let me tell you something. I'm actually, I'm seeing this guy and he's not. He's not that. So he ain't one of them whites. He one of them whites. He's really white. He's see through. No, I'm ginger. Yeah. I'm seeing this new guy next week, so. Oh, I'm excited for that. To taste that.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, I'm excited to hear more.
Dylan Adler
Absolutely.
Interviewer/Host
Wean off the peen, part two.
Dylan Adler
Absolutely. Wean off the peen. Too fast. Two peen.
Interviewer/Host
Two peens coming your way, they say.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, exactly.
Interviewer/Host
Wow. I just found out the plural. I've been saying it a lot. Who would be your Mount Rushmore of reality tv?
Dylan Adler
Well, Tiffany Pollard is the queen of T. She is kind of a comedic genius. She's so fast.
Interviewer/Host
I'd say so.
Dylan Adler
She's so. The line she comes up with, like Beyonce. No, more like Luther Vandross. Like that's something a comedy writer would
Interviewer/Host
could come up with to go in and like, like to say that would
Dylan Adler
take me like, like a minute.
Interviewer/Host
Like a couple try trial and error of like who you put in for a substitute.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow.
Interviewer/Host
Just off the rip like that.
Dylan Adler
Off the cuff.
Interviewer/Host
It's good stuff. Yeah, it really is good stuff.
Dylan Adler
I know. She is so funny. Another reality tv, Mount Rushmore. Oh, I used to really like Bad Girls Club.
Interviewer/Host
Oh my God, I love Bad Girls Club.
Dylan Adler
Tanisha Thomas.
Interviewer/Host
I did not get any sleep because of y'.
Dylan Adler
All.
Interviewer/Host
Now y' all not gonn sleep because of me. I'm trying my very best to never do a black sand again. So if you ever hear me talking super white. That's in reverse.
Dylan Adler
I didn't get sleep because of y'. All.
Interviewer/Host
Now y' all will not get any
Dylan Adler
sleep because of me. So that's actually.
Interviewer/Host
If you watch back this, this podcast, it happens a lot. I'm trying to retrain my brain. It's both good and bad, you know, the fact that I was doing it in the first place, it's like I have a Oprah impression that I had to retire, you know. That was damn good though.
Dylan Adler
Another one of my all time favorite comedians, Deborah Wilson from Mad tv who did Oprah. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, so good. So good.
Dylan Adler
Rushmore comedy.
Interviewer/Host
That TV was awesome.
Dylan Adler
That credit that it was Mad TV was my.
Interviewer/Host
It was so good. It was just like. I don't know, I feel like they were. Got just a tad bit raunchier than snl.
Dylan Adler
It's like they had more people of color than snl. Like they had, you know, there's Bobby Lee, there's, there's Deborah Wilson, there's Nicole Randall Johnson. There's like a lot of incredibly talent Aries, like the so many incredibly talented people that were on the show. Angela Johnson too.
Interviewer/Host
I know. I wonder if you can like still watch that somewhere.
Dylan Adler
I watched a lot of them on YouTube. Like people put them on YouTube.
Interviewer/Host
100.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, I remember.
Interviewer/Host
I remember like sneaking it on YouTube and like thinking I was like, I feel like I'm. I feel like I'm not supposed to watch this. I know.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, it's good stuff. It's good stuff. The wrongs we must write, the fights we must win. The future we must secure together for our nation. This is what, what's in front of us. This determines what's next for all of us. We are marines. We were made for this.
Guest/Additional Speaker
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Interviewer/Host
Do you have. You have any characters under your belt that you have yet to. To let out?
Dylan Adler
I. I used to. Yeah. Have some impressions. Like, I sometimes try to impersonate Ronny Cheng, who I love.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
That's a good one.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. He's like, do you understand how hard it is to teach your mom how to use the Internet over the phone? Yeah. Yeah, that's good. He. I. I love his Kate. I love his delivery. It's so good. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And then any. Any mystical creations that you've mustered up in your own brain?
Dylan Adler
Oh, I'm trying to think.
Interviewer/Host
Do your SNL audition. I just realized what I was doing when I said it.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Oh, mystical cre. I wish I had a mystical.
Interviewer/Host
Well, if I got that question, I'd say, what the are you talking about? I'm so sorry about that.
Dylan Adler
I'm like, I think I'm still high.
Interviewer/Host
Are you insane? Yes. Sorry about that. I don't know what a mystical creation. I have something mustered up in my brain. I don't think I have one of. I think the closest thing I would have would be, like, nothing. I don't have anything. I've got nothing there. And I. I just kind of screwed that whole convo up.
Dylan Adler
What if I was like, oh, the. The shart with a heart of gold.
Interviewer/Host
And there it is. He's that good. Just took a couple. What? What, What? I got it. The shart with the heart of gold coming to a theater near you because nobody knows what the people like anymore.
Dylan Adler
That's right.
Interviewer/Host
Truly and honestly, it's. It's a good. What's it called? What do they call it? It's good ip.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
The people really want to see more of that. Let me. Let me regroup. After bombing, I'm gonna have you take it away and look right into this camera, and we do a segment called Shoutouts. And so you just list off, like, a multitude of shout outs. You can stop whenever you want, just rapid fire style. Anyone, anything, Anybody you want to shout out.
Dylan Adler
My family. Mom, dad, Max, Hannah, my Extended family. And oh, Margaret Cho, I love you so much. You paved the way for every queer Asian comedian. Atsuko, I love you. Best mentor ever. Bowen Yang, Joel Kim, for being fucking. Killing the fucking game. Being incredible role models. Who else? Shout out to. Well, shout out to my faves like Deborah Wilson too, and Raven Simone. Yeah, those are my shout outs.
Interviewer/Host
Thank you very much. And that's the segment we like to call Shout out. Yeah, I'm gonna get a couple off my chest real quick. Shout out to anybody who works at eclairs. Shout out to a dancing queen. I'd like to call Beyonce. Shout out to anybody who's ever looked in the mirror and said, damn it. Shout out to me. I've never done that.
Dylan Adler
That's good.
Interviewer/Host
That felt all right. Shout out to not feeling the best about yourself. Shout out to doctors who prescribe medicine. And shout out to everyone who's ever cried. Yay.
Dylan Adler
Wait, Yours was so beautiful.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, well, it's just. It's kind of just like a free flowing stream of. What the.
Dylan Adler
That's great.
Interviewer/Host
Thank you. Sometimes I just have to get it off my chest.
Dylan Adler
Good.
Interviewer/Host
Anything you want to get off your chest?
Dylan Adler
I'm not gay. No. What? No.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, get out of here.
Dylan Adler
Just do it to get booked.
Advertiser/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I did a crime once.
Dylan Adler
I murdered my cat. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And I liked it.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Sorry. So let's move on to a fun little game.
Dylan Adler
Amazing.
Interviewer/Host
You like a game?
Dylan Adler
I love a game.
Interviewer/Host
Well, what about a game of a. A little this or that?
Dylan Adler
That. Perfect.
Interviewer/Host
Wonderful. I've got some crazy ass scenarios and the rules here are I'm gonna read those scenarios to you. I think. I think you got it. I don't think I gotta read the rules. Just tell me which one you'd rather. I'm a tough reader though, so bear with me. And it's gonna. We're gonna. It's gonna.
Dylan Adler
Absolutely.
Interviewer/Host
You're stuck in an elevator for four hours. Is it playing a 30 second loop of Katy Perry songs or a recording of Liam Michelle reading a book?
Dylan Adler
You know what? You know what? I. I love a lot of Katy Perry songs, so I would choose 30 seconds of waking up in Vegas because that song is actually my.
Interviewer/Host
And you actually can't go to Vegas without listening to it.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, whenever I'm in Vegas, I play that song.
Interviewer/Host
You have to. As soon as I touch down, I'm like, that's what you get. Oh, we're going to retreat weekend. I. Do you gamble?
Dylan Adler
No, actually I didn't.
Interviewer/Host
It's not a very gay thing to do? I don't think.
Dylan Adler
No. Gays don't really gamble.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, I don't think so. Because, like, there's. What else is at Vegas? Clubs.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, clubs stuff.
Interviewer/Host
Pools.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, exactly. At pools. There's. And, you know, I actually. I did it once and I could feel the addictiveness of it. And I lost like 200 bucks. And I was like, hit me, hit me. I had more money until I go up. I'm going to freaking. Yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And then you try to win and it's like. Because you just. You're trying to. You're like, oh, I can get it back.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. I'll get it. I just need a little bit down right now. I'm just down right now.
Interviewer/Host
I just need a bit of a loan.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
And that's what happened to Bruno Mars. But he's good now. We're all very happy for him.
Dylan Adler
Okay.
Interviewer/Host
He's paid his dad. I'm just. I'm just so confused how. Like, I guess the mob's gone.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Because he's not getting slapped around for this money. He just keep playing his guitar until he finishes it, I guess.
Dylan Adler
So the mob is not what it used to be, which is kind of sad.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. Like, I'm not even scared to get roughed around a little bit.
Dylan Adler
I know.
Interviewer/Host
I kind of want a residency so I can lose it all and then just run it back. That sounds like a fun movie.
Dylan Adler
I know. God, I miss the 70s.
Interviewer/Host
I sure do.
Dylan Adler
Right?
Interviewer/Host
I really do. I tried to make my. The studio we have in New York is. It was supposed to be like 70s theme. I had like a. Like a desk and everything. And I was trying to be like Johnny Carson style, kind of. And then I found out very quickly that I'm. I can't read. And so like the whole, like, full on interview without any banter, that didn't.
Dylan Adler
That didn't work.
Interviewer/Host
So I'd rather just, like, do it.
Dylan Adler
I'm also not.
Interviewer/Host
Everything all right. Just leaned on. Sorry. Oh, it's all right. Crazy.
Dylan Adler
Oh, you're so good.
Interviewer/Host
I was checking the camera in my head. Johnny.
Dylan Adler
Johnny Carson. Is the.
Interviewer/Host
The ghost of Johnny Carson live in studio. Are you with us?
Dylan Adler
Oh, it's me, Johnny Carson. Welcome to the studio. I'm here with.
Interviewer/Host
I have full body, chills, incredible grace.
Dylan Adler
Oh, man.
Interviewer/Host
Literally. That was amazing.
Dylan Adler
Sometimes he does. Wow.
Interviewer/Host
I knew there was a white guy in there.
Dylan Adler
I mean, half.
Interviewer/Host
There has been.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, there has. Oh, there has been.
Interviewer/Host
Next question. Yeah, you have to delete one from history.
Dylan Adler
Great.
Interviewer/Host
Lady Gaga's Meat dress or Ariana Grande's ponytail?
Dylan Adler
You know what? I, I, I think the meat dress because I know, I know I love the meat dress. But Ariana's ponytail is associated with Blackiana.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
And those videos give me so much joy.
Interviewer/Host
They really do.
Dylan Adler
And like, we don't like Wicked. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Interviewer/Host
If she didn't, if we cut that ponytail off, maybe Mac Miller would still be alive. Who's to say? Who's to say?
Dylan Adler
Who's to say?
Interviewer/Host
It's not up to me. It's up to Johnny Carson. Yeah, that's right, kid. That's right, kid. I know. I like that. That's good. That's really good. Because that's a, that's a very like, that's a well thought out answer.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. And I love the meat dress. Don't get me wrong.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, but what did it do for us?
Dylan Adler
I know Lady Gaga will still be Gaga.
Interviewer/Host
I mean, she will always be Gaga. I mean, God forbid we lose the meat dress, we gain a, A vegan pants.
Dylan Adler
I know, but without the ponytail we have no. You better get the Tina mobile. I also said it in a really right way.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
See, it gets you to be on top.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Kiyomi, get your ass in here.
Interviewer/Host
We wouldn't have that next one. You can only see movies or concerts forever, so you gotta pick. You're gonna go see movies or concerts. One's gonna be a non existent move.
Dylan Adler
I choose not seeing concerts because I just see more movies. I see movies all the time. And I love concerts. Yeah, yeah. But I love concerts.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, I know. This is actually a very tricky one.
Dylan Adler
It's a hard one. And I just love, I don't know, I love going to the movies with my friends so much.
Interviewer/Host
It is good.
Dylan Adler
That is like. And it's a, I love it as a date. Like.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, movies.
Dylan Adler
So I'd say movies.
Interviewer/Host
So you like, you like a man who shuts the up?
Dylan Adler
Yeah, Yeah. I like a man who doesn't.
Interviewer/Host
My favorite.
Dylan Adler
Open a mouth.
Interviewer/Host
My big idea of a beautiful date is I take you somewhere where you cannot talk. At a concert for some reason. That's allowed.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, exactly. Yes.
Interviewer/Host
And a concert, the concert would be crazy date.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Like for, for the first.
Dylan Adler
Oh, for the first, like.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, that's crazy.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. It's like, it should be like apology meet and greet.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. Something, something along those lines.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And you can get to know what the person's all about right away. Before you right away skip a bunch of red flags and question a lot of things. For sure. For sure. Next up, you're at. You're at karaoke, and you can only pick one Nickelback song.
Dylan Adler
Oh.
Interviewer/Host
Or a Glee song.
Dylan Adler
Glee, because.
Interviewer/Host
And what. What is a Glee song but karaoke.
Dylan Adler
What is a Glee song but covers of better songs?
Interviewer/Host
Yes. It's kind of a loophol question, but
Dylan Adler
I. I think it's. You know, I want to bravely admit something that might get me literally killed.
Interviewer/Host
Okay.
Dylan Adler
The version of Songbird by Fleetwood Mac, the one I listen to the most is the Glee version, not the original version. It doesn't happen very often, but the key. It's in. And Naya Rivera's performance, for some reason, that just. That's. That's the one for me.
Interviewer/Host
And that's why you've been revoked from concert singing over Fleetwood Map.
Dylan Adler
That's fair.
Interviewer/Host
That is. Yeah. You're not wrong. I don't judge, but maybe a little.
Dylan Adler
Sure, you can judge for that.
Interviewer/Host
Hey, you like what you like.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Okay, next scenario. Every day for the next year, you have to run into your most recent situation. She or you're a high school bully. You drunk DMed.
Dylan Adler
Oh, what if they're the same guy? No, just kidding.
Interviewer/Host
What a poor twist.
Dylan Adler
Oh, my God. My situationship, for sure. Yeah, yeah, because.
Interviewer/Host
What did you say in that joke? Gm?
Dylan Adler
I said, why'd you do it?
Interviewer/Host
Why all caps, which is just a letter Y. Y.
Dylan Adler
Just the letter Y.
Interviewer/Host
Exactly. You have to spend a weekend at a silent retreat with either Lana Del Rey or Azealia Banks. Oh, God. Slippery slope.
Dylan Adler
Oh, God, they're both so. They both have their issues. But you know what I think. I actually think when it comes to silent retreat, I actually think Azalea would be the most silent.
Interviewer/Host
Really? Maybe because. Yeah, she can get everything off.
Dylan Adler
I think she would take the retreat seriously. Oh, I think Lana would be on her phone. I think there would be some phone time with Lana.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
So I'm gonna say Azalea.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. No. After much consideration and what you've just said. I agree. Yeah, I agree.
Dylan Adler
And when I land back in New York city, walking to 212.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God.
Dylan Adler
Is my favorite thing to do in New York. It'll walk to the beat of 212.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, 212.
Dylan Adler
It puts me in the best mood.
Interviewer/Host
Kind of. I'm probably going to drive out of here listening to that. Yeah, I know it's LA and all, but I kind of. I needed. I need. Need that.
Dylan Adler
You need that, New York.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Because when you walk to the speed of 212 in LA, people will look at you. They're like, what? Why is he rushing? Why is he rushing? There's nowhere to rush to here.
Interviewer/Host
I don't. Yeah.
Dylan Adler
I'm not.
Interviewer/Host
I don't. I don't love to. I don't like. I don't like the slow pace.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I don't like how things are slow. I. I think it's nice, you know, once you've done.
Dylan Adler
You're also East Coast. You're east coast, girl.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, that's true, too. But, like, you've done your time, you know, and now it's. It's. It's good to kind of. To pivot.
Dylan Adler
I know.
Interviewer/Host
I'm just not there yet.
Dylan Adler
I know. And being a gay living in New York for eight years, I walk at the speed of light, so.
Interviewer/Host
No. I mean, we barely touch the ground.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
They call you glitch. You go so fast.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. I'm literally like. I'm dash on the freaking streets. I've killed old ladies.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. And they had it coming.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And for our last scenario, which is worse, Your Spotify rap being projected on a Jumbotron at msg or your recently deleted photos are being sent to your parents?
Dylan Adler
Recently deleted photos sent to parents.
Guest/Additional Speaker
100.
Dylan Adler
Because they'll see peen and hole. Yeah, I don't want that.
Interviewer/Host
And is there a sneaky third they'll see? And then they'll see my screenshots of a fight
Dylan Adler
and my Spotify wrapped.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God. Everything all wrapped into one.
Dylan Adler
Everything into one. Yeah. Actually, no. I was on Grindr recently, and someone screenshotted all my pics and was like, unless you send me $1,000 right now, I have all your contacts. And he did. Because from some online side, he's like, I have your grandparents, your parents.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my goodness.
Dylan Adler
We're gonna send all of your nudes to them. And I was like, please don't. They did a countdown, and they were like, well, well, good luck telling everyone you're gay. That's the big reveal.
Interviewer/Host
That is the dun, dun, dun.
Dylan Adler
That is your big. You think I pass? He thinks I pass. I'm like, okay, put me in a Marvel film, then Hollywood. I pass.
Interviewer/Host
I say, do a reverse uno. Let's get this guy. I want to get him back. Because clearly he's closeted. Obviously, if you are telling other people, I know that this is as if it would be your biggest fear of all time, then you've got your own problems.
Dylan Adler
It's like, it is a scamming guy.
Interviewer/Host
What? A scammy guy. So this scammy guy. Did you ever, like, have good, like, banter with them or, like, where did this come from?
Dylan Adler
So it came from. He lured me in with a hot pick.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
That probably took you in these hotties.
Interviewer/Host
You just can't stand yourself.
Dylan Adler
I know. It's bad.
Interviewer/Host
You're screwing.
Dylan Adler
Horniness has ruined my life.
Interviewer/Host
Put that on a T shirt.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Ornias has ruined my life.
Dylan Adler
Yeah. But, yeah, I think, like, he's just like, use some other guy's pictures. Like, and then, like, once I sent him all my stuff, he's like, all right, we got him. This must be. Yeah. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Well, he must be stopped.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Well, I'm gonna make it my life mission to find him and kill him.
Dylan Adler
Thank you so much. I love you, grace.
Interviewer/Host
Of course. 100 and I know guys. I know a lot of guys, actually. Yeah, I know.
Dylan Adler
I believe it. I mean, you're Boston.
Interviewer/Host
I'll make it look like an accident and then tell all myself.
Dylan Adler
Perfect.
Interviewer/Host
Then run away.
Dylan Adler
Perfect.
Interviewer/Host
I can. I can. Dude, you won't be able to find me.
Dylan Adler
I believe. I believe you. Hey, the 70s are back.
Interviewer/Host
They sure are.
Dylan Adler
I'm sure, baby.
Interviewer/Host
Actually, they kind of are here in la because last night I was at a bar and they were going around with a. A, A literal silver plate water of loose cigarettes. But they did say you have to smoke them outside. Which I'm like, come on. It's kind of defeatful at this point. Yeah, but what the heck. Yeah, they're kind of. They are like, running it back over here.
Dylan Adler
It's back.
Interviewer/Host
I know. So where. When's our. When's our Woodstock? Like, yeah. 70s, like, one love, pivot piece kind of vibe. When are we gonna get that for that?
Dylan Adler
I'm excited for when that happens.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. I'm like, like, when are the cult leaders gonna start standing up? Yeah.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Because that's like, you know, who's the next Manson?
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
It's important.
Dylan Adler
Who's gonna, like, break out and become big? Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I'm thinking about.
Dylan Adler
Might be you, bitch. You do it. I'm like, I knew her like, we were pals. Like, we hung in New York.
Interviewer/Host
You are going to be part of the cult. I have a great role for you.
Dylan Adler
Great.
Interviewer/Host
You're not just one of the followers, but you'. You're gonna. You're gonna write the rules. We're gonna write the rules.
Dylan Adler
And I have late night experience, so that's perfect. To realize the future America needs, we understand what's needed from us to face each threat head on. We've earned Our place in the fight for our nation's future. We are Marines. We were made for this.
Guest/Additional Speaker
The GLP1 pill you've been waiting for is now on ROE. Yep, it's finally here. With the same clinically proven ingredient now in a pill. And now on Roe. It's the first FDA approved GLP1 pill for weight loss at the lowest price available. That's one daily GLP one pill for big results now on ro. Go to ro. Listen to see if you qualify. RX only go to RO CO Safety for serious side effects and boxed warning associated with GLP1s.
Interviewer/Host
What would be your top three rules in a cult?
Dylan Adler
Top three rules in a cult. Number one would honestly be good nutrition and food.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, yeah.
Dylan Adler
And like yummy, right?
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. That's how you get them.
Dylan Adler
I was just in Japan. I was like, that's. That's got to be a number one priority for life. Good tasting food.
Interviewer/Host
What was the best thing you had in Japan?
Dylan Adler
I had the best soba noodles of my life. I had the best strawberry ice cream of my entire life. I had the best tempura of my life. The best, the best halibut of my life.
Interviewer/Host
I didn't stop.
Dylan Adler
I can't even stop.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God, it sounds so good.
Dylan Adler
It was amazing. Wow. Yeah.
Guest/Additional Speaker
Wow.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
What was your favorite part of the trip?
Dylan Adler
My favorite part of the trip was doing comedy with my fan. With my brother. And my family was there. Even, like my. My mom's cousin, who barely speaks any English, like, showed up and like, I do, like nasty gay material. And afterwards the first thing he said was, what is straight? Exactly. I was like, who knows?
Interviewer/Host
Actually, who's to say?
Dylan Adler
I don't think it exists.
Interviewer/Host
Not in this family. That's awesome. That's really great.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So you have a sister, you said. So it's you, your brother, your sister, any. Any other stragglers?
Dylan Adler
No.
Interviewer/Host
So your sister, does she ever feel left out?
Dylan Adler
She will. You know, she has autism and she's developmentally delayed. And you know, she was like our. She's our older sister, two years older. But when we became like six, seven, she kind of became like our younger sister. And we would like sometimes take care of her like teenagers. We would sometimes watch after her and you know, like, she is very much on her. Like she is very on her own wavelength. Very, like independent, very self sufficient. Like, honestly, like, when me and my brother come home, we're like. And then she's like, it's too much, too much. Gays are too much.
Interviewer/Host
So loud, you know? Oh, so you get. You guys got a good thing going.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, we got a good thing going. And also, she likes her alone time. Like, you know me. It was like me and my brother competing for my mom's attention. Me and my sister had, like, a very, like, special. She's like, definitely daddy's girl. And then. Yeah, like, you know, and then she just, like, goes on her own and, like, you know, entertains herself.
Interviewer/Host
That's great. Yeah, that's really good stuff. So there's no animosity between brothers and sister? Just brothers and brothers?
Dylan Adler
Yeah. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Exactly the way God intended.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Any fist fights between the two movies?
Dylan Adler
Oh, yeah. Oh, well, we were gay.
Interviewer/Host
That's like. That's. That's pretty fair fight, for sure.
Dylan Adler
Oh, yeah. But we. The way we fought was we slapped and we bit. That's okay. And then. And then, like, one. Like. Like, we'd. Like the way we'd fight, we'd be like, you don't have star quality. No, you don't have star quality. And then, like, it was like, that's how we fought.
Interviewer/Host
And that's a reality show. I want to watch Bad Gays Club. Bad Gays. What was it? So what's your favorite season of Bad Girls Club? Because I fucking love that.
Dylan Adler
I love it.
Interviewer/Host
It doesn't get the love it deserves.
Dylan Adler
I know. My favorite season's one with Tanisha. Season two.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God.
Dylan Adler
And then season four with Natalie Nunn.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, my God.
Dylan Adler
Honestly, I loved. I was obsessed with her.
Interviewer/Host
Obsessed.
Dylan Adler
I was obsessed. And then when she beat up Portia, when Portia beat her up, like, where the fuck are you, Natalie? You stupid bitch? You want to bring my child up into this? And then she literally picks her up on the ground.
Advertiser/Host
We.
Dylan Adler
Me and my brother reenacted that fight, and I accidentally gave him a bloody.
Interviewer/Host
Like, we were really committed.
Dylan Adler
We were committed. We loved that show.
Interviewer/Host
That show was so awesome. It was. It was like, so. It was. There was nothing else. Like, it. I mean, there was Jersey Shore, but they were, like, just, like, chilling for the most part. Like. Yeah, Back Girls Club was putting on a show. They were there for all the right reasons. Yeah, it's back. Back, but it's called Baddies now, and Natalie Nun runs it.
Dylan Adler
That's right. She runs it.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, I like. I Like a flip of the narrative.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I like taking the power into your own.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
That's good stuff.
Dylan Adler
I know. And, like, me and my brother just, like, the fights. Yeah, we like the fight. And we went to, like.
Interviewer/Host
I hated it. I hated when they got along.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, me too. I hated it.
Interviewer/Host
I'm like, I don't. I. I mean, I'm a. I'm a girl to support girls, but not for that particular show.
Dylan Adler
I'm a feminist. Except for that.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. No, I want. I want all these.
Dylan Adler
I want them to.
Interviewer/Host
But actually, I want them all to win. So it's like, that is a good take on it of, like, you know, I just want to see them all winning. And by winning, they have to beat the. Out of each other.
Dylan Adler
Yes.
Interviewer/Host
It's a different outlook.
Dylan Adler
No, me and my brother would be like, she's the best fighter. No, I think she's the best fighter. No, honestly, like, Natalie is the best fighter, but, like, Porsche, like, was so angry, she won.
Interviewer/Host
And then there's. There's other guys that are watching UFC because being like, yo, he's the best fighter. No, but we're talking about bad girls
Dylan Adler
against women on reality TV shows. That is. Those are my fighters.
Interviewer/Host
Those are the real fighters.
Dylan Adler
I know.
Interviewer/Host
Those are the real veterans.
Dylan Adler
Bad girls Club. Is UFC for the girls engaged?
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, it really is.
Dylan Adler
Really?
Interviewer/Host
And Natalie Nunn is Joe Rogan. It's crazy. Dana White.
Dylan Adler
I think so, actually.
Interviewer/Host
Wow, that's. What a beautiful pivot. That's great. I mean, equality.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Speaking of, you know, the past and being young, I do do a segment here called Disgraceful Receipts where we pull up things from your. Your. Your Internet history. No gotchas, just more of a. What is this? And so I've got these right here, and I. I would just like you to explain what's going on in these. This is my favorite one. We're going to start off at the top. It is an email that says, I saw your show and you mentioned you're into piss. In case you're still in town on Sunday, there's a piss party in Brooklyn. It's called Faucet. And then he sent the part party full link right here. So what's this?
Dylan Adler
You know what? I love the gay community thing, you
Interviewer/Host
know, for each other.
Dylan Adler
And honestly, the real, if I'm being truthful, I'm not into piss. It's just for a joke that I say, and it gets a laugh, and I'm like, okay, I'll do it. But I.
Interviewer/Host
Very funny for someone like, okay, noted.
Dylan Adler
They're like, I get it. Oh, after the show, game recognized. Game come to my.
Interviewer/Host
You know, piss mentioned.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. He's asleep the whole time. He's like, yeah, he wakes up for that.
Interviewer/Host
He's a promoter for Faucet. I Knew I had some piss heads in here.
Dylan Adler
Exactly. Come on, give me a brand deal. I want a partnership with you. Faucet it. But you know, it was very sweet of this person to send that to me. Very nice. I. I did not go, but thank you.
Interviewer/Host
No kiss or piss.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, and then the video you mentioned previously. Yes.
Dylan Adler
Oh, yes.
Interviewer/Host
I like the still of this though. You know, I think it makes it.
Dylan Adler
Wow. You know, as I see this not to. I'm getting chills. Honestly. This is kind of. It is like a. A piece of art of like. Whoa. What?
Interviewer/Host
It's a dbq.
Dylan Adler
And I'm seeing. I'm hearing clown, faggot, clown. And my. I'm just. It's great.
Interviewer/Host
I think, I think those soldiers, I mean, although they do look pissed.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I will say I think they were jealous. I think they were very jealous.
Dylan Adler
Perfect.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, and let's hit it again.
Dylan Adler
I'm a one trick pony,
Interviewer/Host
but, you know, it's not a one time guy guy. You know, you're gonna get what you. What you love every time for sure. 100.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
A back handspring is something I could never figure out as a. As a chubby kid. So therefore, no cheerleading team. I'm over it. Oh, surfer.
Dylan Adler
Yes. I love to surf.
Interviewer/Host
That's awesome. So when did. When did you find that out about yourself?
Dylan Adler
I love to. And fun. The. The board right next to mine is my brother's board.
Interviewer/Host
He fell off on our ride, as everyone should know. No, you are the star and you can stand, but my. I'm the real stand up.
Dylan Adler
I stand up. You sit down on your board. Yes, crash. That's right. But my uncle taught me when we were like 12 because he lived in Ventura county in like near Oxnard, near the beach there.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, cool.
Dylan Adler
So he taught us to surf and I. I have loved it ever since.
Interviewer/Host
That's so awesome. That's such a fun. It's so cool to have a hobby.
Dylan Adler
I know. And also like now like, because I've done it enough. Like, I'm not like advanced or anything, but if like it's okay enough like anywhere. If there's waves, I. It's like you could surf if you have the.
Interviewer/Host
Totally. And so do you. You have a board and all that jazz. How often you get. Get out there?
Dylan Adler
Not as much as I want to. Maybe like, like. Oh man, like just twice a year now, but. Oh, rats. I know. I got. I got to do that more often.
Interviewer/Host
That's awesome. I mean, look at. You're having a blast.
Dylan Adler
I would love I know. So much fun.
Interviewer/Host
My apologies.
Dylan Adler
You're good.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, and what makes you sing with such a. Oh, man.
Dylan Adler
You know, I think that one gave me a hernia and.
Interviewer/Host
So this. Is this an angry song?
Dylan Adler
No, this is a. Yeah. Angry song. So I think this was actually a song I used to sing about when straight men would flirt with me, and I thought they were like, oh. But then it's like, no, I'm straight. Anyway.
Interviewer/Host
He's just a gateway.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So I'm like your stepping stone to them finding out who they really are.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, I think so. Maybe.
Interviewer/Host
Maybe that's like a positive outlook, I guess.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I don't know.
Dylan Adler
But maybe that was me screaming, don't touch my lower back.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, but for real, though.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, don't touch my lower back. Yeah,
Interviewer/Host
Well, I thought. I thought. I thought you had your foot out, too, but that. Those.
Dylan Adler
It's the.
Interviewer/Host
It's the pattern of the gene now. This is incredible. Oh, Hudson Yards.
Dylan Adler
Hudson Yards. You know the place.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, no, sorry. Yeah. Hudson Yards. Yes.
Dylan Adler
So my mom took that photo of me. Yeah. She's like, oh, this is fun.
Interviewer/Host
She's a friend of the show.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
She. She's all in. She's locked in.
Dylan Adler
I'm so. My parents are, like, very cool and down for stuff, and they're like, like, you know, they're at the show yesterday and they were like, oh, joke about whatever the.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, that's awesome. That's, like, so huge to have.
Dylan Adler
I know.
Interviewer/Host
Some people aren't as lucky. Yeah, some. I. I've heard some families get very upset.
Dylan Adler
For sure.
Interviewer/Host
For sure. And they're like, oh, yeah. It's like, it's. They could be. They could have a special come out. And they're like, so when are you going to go back to banking?
Dylan Adler
I know, I know.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, what's this?
Dylan Adler
Oh, my God.
Interviewer/Host
Okay, so I'm seeing these live with you for the first time as well, you know.
Dylan Adler
Wow. So what's happening is I have sleep apnea.
Interviewer/Host
Sorry for your time.
Dylan Adler
I wear a CPAP machine, and with my CPAP machine, I usually wear a eye mask with it. So, you know. So you.
Interviewer/Host
Full. Full body coverage.
Dylan Adler
Full body coverage. But in this instance, I couldn't find my sleep mask. It was on Fire Island. Bunch. Bunch of queers in the room, which I just found.
Interviewer/Host
There's only, like, restaurants there.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
That's crazy.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
That's so bananas. But nobody's hungry.
Dylan Adler
The gays don't eat.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, this, like. I mean, there. There are some things going on while you're there. That kind of just make you not that hungry.
Dylan Adler
For sure. For sure. Honestly. Because I within, like, I feel. I like, love, like, good food, good appetite. So sometimes when I'm around those kinds, I'm like, get me someone. Get me a ste. You know, but like, our house is like a good freaking. Like, it feels like. It feels like an escape room. Like a torture. I'm like, you don't eat breakfast. There's no cereal in this fucking house.
Interviewer/Host
Someone slaps you and it's like, we got a party.
Dylan Adler
I know. Exactly. Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
It's reminded of the gutter. We're not talking about bread.
Dylan Adler
Literally. Literally.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. It does sound like like a survival game.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Like going. Going over to the island is. See if you can make it back. It's Survivor.
Dylan Adler
It's Survivor. Literally. Survivor.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah, it's just like glamping Survivor, dry
Dylan Adler
chicken breasts, you know, like.
Interviewer/Host
Like, if you're lucky, if somebody bought like a bag of chips, you.
Dylan Adler
Yes, yes. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
I can't have another.
Dylan Adler
Exactly.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, what's this?
Dylan Adler
Oh, my God. Okay. This was pandemic Halloween, and I went as Zuko from Avatar Last Airbender.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, there we go. Oh, hell yes.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And so, you know, during COVID you know, you gotta make do with what you have.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And so did you just have a robe lying around or just had an ordered thing?
Dylan Adler
You know, this is actually something that my white grandparents got me when I was six.
Interviewer/Host
Okay.
Dylan Adler
At the Oxnard Aubon Festival. And it still fits me.
Interviewer/Host
Oh, as a goddamn needle.
Dylan Adler
No. I don't know. No, it's literally a crop top. It's, like, so small. It's like, underneath, it's nothing.
Interviewer/Host
Sexy Halloween costume.
Dylan Adler
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, like, this, I think, was like, some face paint that I bought from party City.
Interviewer/Host
You look very serious.
Dylan Adler
Thank you. Thank you.
Interviewer/Host
Committed.
Dylan Adler
Thank you. I was like, the world is going through a serious time right now. Oh, my God.
Interviewer/Host
This is a little different.
Guest/Additional Speaker
Different.
Dylan Adler
So this is different. And I want to tell the emo community that my cult, your culture, is not my costume. And I'm so sorry. I was a little emo in high school, so I feel like I have some right to do this.
Interviewer/Host
Emo is spectrum.
Dylan Adler
Emo's a spectrum. But, you know, I hope you forgive me. And, you know, I'm. I'm on. Yeah. This was for a shoot where I played someone's stepson. Yeah, Classic stepson. Classic stepson.
Interviewer/Host
Now, was that a porn? Porn?
Dylan Adler
I was low on money, you know, I knew the direction.
Interviewer/Host
Here you Know.
Dylan Adler
You know. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
So this is. I didn't think that this would be emo. Rather. I thought you were like more of like a. Yeah, like more of like. Like somebody who's gonna like probably like beat you up or like.
Dylan Adler
Oh.
Interviewer/Host
Like I didn't. I didn't take this as someone in touch with their. Their feelings. Feelings. You know, right stance were emotional.
Dylan Adler
No, you're right. Actually. This is not. I just realized that I really. Yeah. I really mis. Did that word. It's not emo. This is. Yeah. Scary.
Interviewer/Host
Like it's not even scary. You know, I have a friend who's. Who's here for the weekend. She's a Disney adult and she's very excited to go to Disneyland. She's never been. And so she got there and it was infiltrated with a bunch of emo people. It was emo day.
Dylan Adler
They have gay day, then they have emo.
Interviewer/Host
It was. I mean, everyone's accepted, but you only get your one day of the year there at Disney.
Dylan Adler
So emo day.
Interviewer/Host
It was emo goth day. And as a Disney adult, she was furious that it was not lit up in pastels, but rather more of a funeral vibe. And she said she cried emo.
Dylan Adler
Disney adult adults. I've never. Now I've heard everything.
Interviewer/Host
I know that sounds like a mad lib.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Just doesn't check. And we're back to square one. Were you shaking in your boots about what could have happened just then or.
Dylan Adler
You know what? I'm. Honestly, I. I was glad I didn't see any polar hole.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah. No. Yeah. And I don't think. I think you're pretty good. Cuz we sourced high and low for it. We tried to find.
Dylan Adler
Thank you. Well, I know where you can find it. Reach out to my friend who tried.
Advertiser/Host
Lawyer.
Interviewer/Host
I just asked your grandma. I guess she thought it's my grandma.
Dylan Adler
She's. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And so I'm gonna end this with asking you. Do you have any secrets you want to just like, you know, never hold on to anymore and just finally unleash? Because I'm sure we all have a few.
Dylan Adler
I liked Amelia Pere.
Interviewer/Host
And we're gonna end on that. Thank you very much.
Dylan Adler
I'm sorry. I did.
Interviewer/Host
Yeah.
Dylan Adler
I can't help it.
Interviewer/Host
And so did the. The board of whoever the hell gave him all those awards that season.
Dylan Adler
Yeah.
Advertiser/Host
Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
And so I just want you to take this time and use this camera for your own delight. You can you just. Just tell them where to find you.
Dylan Adler
What you got going on.
Interviewer/Host
Do praying hand emoji. Cuz God forbid that's a real thing you do in real life. I just think of praying hand emoji.
Dylan Adler
Life is online. Yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Thank you.
Dylan Adler
You can follow me on the Instagram Dylan Adler tik tok Dylan Adler 7 or my new YouTube page. Dylan Adler Comedy Hell yeah. Hell yeah.
Interviewer/Host
Thank you so much for coming on. And you're a good, really gem.
Dylan Adler
You're a gem.
Interviewer/Host
Stop it.
Dylan Adler
Grace. Thank you for having me. This was so fun.
Guest/Additional Speaker
This was great.
Interviewer/Host
I had a blast. Thank you.
Dylan Adler
I love you.
Interviewer/Host
I love you.
Dylan Adler
To realize the future America needs. We understand what's needed from us to face each threat head on. We've earned our place in the fight for our nation future. We are Marines. We were made for this.
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Interviewer/Host
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Host: Grace O’Malley (Unwell)
Guest: Dylan Adler
In this uproarious, freewheeling episode, comedian and musical powerhouse Dylan Adler joins Grace O’Malley in NYC to engage in a fast-paced, confessional, and bit-heavy audition to become her Disgraceful co-host. With a spirit of improvisation and constant banter, they cover everything from wild dating stories and musical comedy to twin dynamics and social media absurdities. Plus, candid insights on navigating queerness, comedy’s changing landscape, unlikely DMs, and even a not-so-secret love for “Bad Girls Club." Unfiltered, affectionate, and loaded with memorable laughs.
“It’s me, Johnny Carson. Welcome to the studio.” (01:38)
Grace: “Universal Studios.”
Dylan: “Best backflip. Oh, faggot.” (02:44)
“Some of them are freaking wild cards.” (03:29)
Prefers NYC dating for its variety ("Not always just another actor...my first boyfriend was a chef.”) (04:00)
“Sang to Paula Deen…posted it on Insta…kind of insane.” (05:23)
Talks about performing with Emily Wilson—bonding over being musical comics:
“When people are singing, I get like goosebumps and almost cry...this is so confusing because it’s beautiful voices and funny jokes.” —Grace (07:41)
Megan Stalter praised as “the actual queen” for turning talking into musical comedy.
Dylan recounts his viral “Universal Studios” dancer video.
“For a whole month, my DMs were like: clown, faggot, clown, faggot, clown…so you agree I’m a gay comedian.” (12:05)
Wildest DM: a lesbian couple bluntly asking for his sperm.
“Lesbians are very blunt and direct...I love you, thank you, but I don’t think you want this psychotic sperm.” (12:44)
Dylan’s twin brother also does stand-up in Tucson; sibling rivalry is real but supportive.
Grace: “You’re not allowing him into your LA space?”
Dylan: “I’ve learned to embrace it. I’ve tried my best to stop him. I’ve spread allegations about him.” (14:06)
Both have, at times, matched with the same guy on Tinder—resolve it with logic, not drama.
“Who matched first? Whose type is this more?” (19:53)
Family came to see Dylan perform in Tokyo—mother’s cousin, who doesn’t speak English, responded to his “nasty gay material” with:
“What is straight?” (57:08)
Sister, who is developmentally delayed, maintains her own independent world amid Dylan and Max’s “too much” gay energy. (57:46)
Worst hookup story: Being fetishized by a white guy obsessed with Japanese culture—bonsai, anime, samurai hat.
“He was making anime hentai sounds...red flags I’m blowing past because I’m horny.” (22:52)
“Weaning off the white peen” bit — Dylan jokes about trying to date more POC men and avoid his pattern of dating problematic white guys.
“I’m trying to wean off the white peen…tough track record.” (33:02)
Grindr and DM horror stories: Blackmail attempts, internet catfishers, and the perils of nudes.
“Horniness has ruined my life.” (53:26)
“Bad Girls Club is UFC for the girls and gays.” (61:33)
“I don’t mind when things go off the rails; sometimes that’s where the comedic moments are.” (26:39)
Elevator for 4 hours: Katy Perry 30-sec loop vs. Lea Michele audiobook?
“I love Katy Perry, so I’d choose ‘Waking Up in Vegas.’” (42:22)
Lady Gaga’s meat dress vs. Ariana's ponytail erased from history?
“The meat dress. Ariana’s ponytail is associated with Blackiana—those videos give me so much joy.” (45:12)
Movies or concerts forever?
“Movies. That’s like, my favorite date.” (46:40)
Karaoke: Nickelback song or a Glee cover?
“Glee. What is a Glee song but karaoke?” (47:49)
“I bravely admit: my most played ‘Songbird’ is the Glee version, not Fleetwood Mac.” (48:11)
Most embarrassing: Spotify Wrapped on MSG jumbotron vs. deleted photos to parents?
“Deleted photos. They’ll see peen and hole — I don’t want that.” (51:54)
Audience member invited Dylan to a “piss party” after a bit—he clarifies he’s “not actually into piss, it’s just a joke that gets a laugh.”
“Very sweet of this person—but I did not go. No kiss or piss.” (63:22)
Recurring “Universal Studios” dancer bit (viral video)
Family support: parents actively encourage his most outrageous material—mom even takes Instagram photos for him.
For listeners, this episode offers an off-the-wall romp through queer comedy, internet culture, wild dating stories, and the real-life absurdities of showbiz and family. Dylan Adler emerges as both a skilled comedian and a thoughtful, open-hearted storyteller, matched beat for beat by Grace O’Malley’s quick wit. Expect bits, bits, and more bits—with enough honesty to keep things grounded (well, mostly).