Distractible Podcast – “Shame, Shame, Shame”

Episode Date: September 26, 2025
Hosts: Mark Fischbach (Markiplier), Wade Barnes, Bob Muyskens
Theme: Airing Grievances and Public Shame

Episode Overview

In this spirited and meandering episode, Mark, Wade, and Bob dive into the nature of “shameful” moments—public, personal, and entirely tongue-in-cheek. The trio build on their signature banter to discuss internet controversies, awkward anecdotes, and take satirical aim at everything from celebrity faux pas to malfunctioning refrigerators. Points are awarded for particularly shameful contributions, resulting in a playfully competitive airing of grievances.

Key Discussion Points & Memorable Exchanges

1. Opening Banter & Culinary Small Talk

(02:07–13:47)

• Steak and Smoked Meat Debates
  • Bob shares a new method for smoking pork shoulder with “big chunks of wood” (05:43).

    “My dad made the best smoked pulled pork shoulder I’ve had in a while...and it was real good.” – Bob (06:27)

  • Mark details his evolving steak-cooking process—air fryer, reverse sear, and cast iron convenience vs. perfection debates.

    “With A1 sauce, anything can be good. But I learned a new strategy: low-temp air fryer, then pan sear.” – Mark (07:48)

  • Bob recommends high-carbon steel pans as a happy medium.

    “It has similar capability to cast iron but is way lighter.” – Bob (10:18)

  • Wade details his unfortunate quest for a mashed potato side gone wrong due to a leaky, unsealed package (13:16).

2. The Shame Segment Begins

(15:40–22:40)

• Mark transitions to the heart of the episode: searching for modern tales of shame and calling out the worst offenders.

• Wade admits being “tall and bald” hoping it’ll count as shame; Mark is supportive:

  “There’s no shame in that, buddy. You gotta be proud.” – Mark (15:53)

• The Tennis Hat Incident (16:31–22:40)

  • A viral tale is recounted: a tall adult snatches a signed tennis player’s cap intended for a child.
  • Wade sides, jokingly, with the adult (“be bigger kid...you’ll win next time”) (17:00), as Mark reads the offender’s unapologetic, cocky statement:

    “I won the hat because I am stronger and therefore I’m consciously keeping it.” (17:02)

  • A subsequent, almost comically contrite statement is issued by the same person, only to backpedal further (“bad translation...he was explaining, like, the hat was supposed to be given to that boy. I’m sorry...I kept the hat.” – Bob, 20:10).
  • The group mocks his lawsuit threats and ploy for sympathy, labeling it as “shameful.”

3. Celebrity, Culture, and Internet Gripes

(22:41–39:21)

• Music Video Injustice
  • Mark highlights Sabrina Carpenter’s “Man Child” music video for not featuring extra Robert Rex enough, bemoaning:

    “Shame on Sabrina Carpenter for not featuring the star...Robert Rex should have been at the top of the building.” – Mark (24:05)

  • Further, he accuses Sabrina of "ripping off" Ninja Sex Party’s music (28:05), dubbing it “shameful.”
• Grievances vs. Having Grievances
  • Bob admits he came unprepared to complain, prompting meta-shaming for lack of shaming (28:43).
• Travis Kelce, Taylor Swift & Allegiance
  • Wade mockingly shames NFL star Travis Kelce for representing too many cities and states, suggesting a lack of loyalty (29:18).
• University of Cincinnati Snub
  • Mark and Wade lament not being more valued as alumni, especially compared to Kelce, suggesting the university itself should be ashamed (31:15).
• The Samsung Fridge Rant
  • Bob lambasts Samsung for a refrigerator that repeatedly froze into a block of ice:

    “Who designs a drain tube that gets clogged? ...Samsung, either stop making refrigerators or steal someone else’s design.” – Bob (32:16)

• No Man’s Sky Update Woes
  • Wade pokes fun at the timing of No Man’s Sky updates for interfering with his productivity.

4. Pet Peeves & Newsworthy Shame

(39:21–44:02)

• Viral Hashtags & Clickbait
  • Wade rails against misleading trending hashtags:

    “Shame on hashtags for even existing. They’re clickbaity bullshit.” (40:00)

• Local Political Scandal
  • Bob brings up an Adams County Commissioner allegedly filming OnlyFans content in a helicopter—shameful, says all (39:34).
• Absurd International Headlines
  • Mark reads about a UK Green Party leader’s past breast-enlargement hypnotherapy (36:28), leading to mockery and speculation.

5. Society, Class, & Academic Shame

(44:02–53:13)

• Part-time Teacher Scandal in Japan
  • Bob details a Japanese teacher’s public shaming (and firing) for holding a second job at a convenience store:

    “The teacher had to issue an apology for having another job.” (43:23)

  • The hosts satirically shame social mobility and aspiration.

    “Shame on both the poors for trying to get out...and also shame on the riches for even deigning the other areas with their presence.” – Mark (44:02)

• Emma Watson: Speeding & Academia
  • Bob brings up Emma Watson getting a 6-month license suspension for speeding at Oxford, alongside a Harry Potter co-star.
  • Further playful shame is heaped for “getting a PhD in philosophy” (51:29).

6. Highways, Speeding, and Everyday Annoyances

(50:07–51:47)

• The trio vent about speeding tickets, traffic stress, and “shame on slow mergers”—a relatable, Midwestern complaint.

7. Points, Wheels, and Episode Wrap-up

(54:20–62:16)

• In typical Distractible fashion, the episode ends with the points tally, bonus wheel spins, and the crowning of a “winner” (Mark, by chance and by shameful topic contribution).
• Bob and Wade offer tongue-in-cheek loser speeches, with repeated sponsor mentions.
• Reaffirmation of podcast originality:

  “We are original. We are great. I’m a winner. And therefore we’re all a winner. Except you’re not. Just me.” – Mark (61:02)

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• “I emphasize that I won the hat because I am stronger and therefore I am consciously keeping it. I do not greet people sick with envy.”
  – Mark quoting viral tennis fan, (17:02)
• “It’s basically a convection oven...not as good, but still not bad.”
  – Mark on air fryer steak, (10:11)
• “Who designs a drain tube that gets clogged? ... Samsung, either stop making refrigerators or steal someone else's design!”
  – Bob (32:16)
• “Shame on hashtags for even existing. They’re clickbaity bullshit.”
  – Wade (40:00)
• “We should all be separate, but inequal.”
  – Wade, ironically, after a satire about class separation, (44:34)
• “Emma Watson is a coxswain...the shame does not belong to Emma Watson...but the High Wycombe Magistrates Court.”
  – Bob, on academic and legal woes (45:11)
• “We have a game show involved and that’s what sets us apart. We are original. We are great. I’m a winner. ... And I think I contributed more shame articles than you guys did anyway, so I think I deserve it.”
  – Mark (61:02)

Segment Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamps | Highlights | |---------------------------|-------------------|----------------------------------------| | Opening Banter / Small Talk | 02:07–13:47 | Grill tips, steak, minor tragedies | | Shameful Deeds: Tennis Hat | 16:31–22:40 | Viral shame, statements, mockery | | Pop Culture / Music Gripes | 22:41–39:21 | Sabrina Carpenter, Samsung, Kelce | | Local & Global Oddities | 39:21–44:02 | OnlyFans in a helicopter, hashtags | | Academic & Speeding Shame | 44:02–53:13 | Emma Watson, school, class jokes | | Traffic & Road Anxieties | 50:07–51:47 | Speeding, merging | | Wheel / Points / Wrap-up | 54:20–62:16 | Game conclusion, speeches, meta banter |

Closing Thoughts

“Shame, Shame, Shame” is classic Distractible: irreverent, improvisational, and crammed with both sharp jabs and loving in-jokes. The episode is less about real condemnation and more a playful roast of people, places, and pet peeves—reminding listeners not to take themselves (or anything else) too seriously. The signature blend of off-the-wall anecdotes, running gags about points and winners, and endless sponsor cameos makes this a quintessential installment for fans, old and new.