[encore] Atsuko Okatsuka

Summary

Podcast Summary: Don't Ask Tig – Encore Episode Featuring Atsuko Okatsuka

Episode Information

• Title: [Encore] Atsuko Okatsuka
• Host: Tig Notaro
• Guest: Atsuko Okatsuka
• Release Date: August 14, 2024
• Producer: American Public Media

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Introduction and Guest Introduction

The episode opens with Tig Notaro welcoming listeners to an encore presentation of a favorite archived episode, featuring comedian and radio host Atsuko Okatsuka. Tig sets a warm and humorous tone, immediately establishing a comfortable rapport with Atsuko.

Notable Quote:

• Tig Notaro [00:45]: "Are you ready, Atsuko?"
• Atsuko Okatsuka [00:45]: "I'm ready, Tig."

Personal Anecdotes and Icebreaker

Atsuko shares a light-hearted story about receiving "energy pills" from her husband, sparking a comedic exchange about the nature of vitamins versus energy supplements.

Notable Quote:

• Atsuko Okatsuka [02:02]: "It's like a Japanese pill that my grandma just smuggled back one time and yeah, I think it's supposed to be vitamin B stuff, but you know."
• Tig Notaro [02:08]: "You're a stand up and you're the host of let's Go Atsuko."

Discussion on Japanese Game Shows

Atsuko delves into her interest in Japanese game shows, particularly highlighting the unique concept of "Candy or Not Candy," where participants bite into objects without knowing if they are edible. This segues into a nostalgic conversation about Tig's childhood experiences with "The Price is Right."

Notable Quote:

• Atsuko Okatsuka [02:46]: "It's called Candy or Not Candy. I can see you thriving on that show, honestly."
• Tig Notaro [03:42]: "Yeah, when I was little, I was very generically into the Price is Right."

Stand-Up Comedy Experiences

The conversation takes a personal turn as Atsuko recounts performing stand-up during an earthquake, leading to a humorous yet insightful discussion about handling unexpected disruptions during a performance.

Notable Quote:

• Atsuko Okatsuka [06:00]: "I went up on stage dancing. That's when the audience started screaming. Earthquake, Earthquake."
• Tig Notaro [07:35]: "People were very upset that I was not there and that you were there."

Listener Questions and Advice Segment

The core of the episode revolves around answering listener-submitted questions. Tig and Atsuko tackle various life challenges, offering their unique blend of humor and heartfelt advice.

Question 1: Overcoming Heartache After a Breakup

• Jane writes: "How do I get over someone who I dumped but now realize was my soulmate? It’s been three years, and I’m still sad."

Advice Provided:

• Tig suggests reflecting on patterns of push and pull in relationships, emphasizing that true soulmates reveal themselves naturally.
• Atsuko encourages finding new relationships to help move on, likening it to appreciating a new pet without constant comparisons.

Notable Quote:

• Tig Notaro [10:40]: "I don't know if I believe in soulmates."
• Atsuko Okatsuka [12:10]: "I could have been compatible with three other people, but I’m thrilled that it’s Stephanie."

Question 2: Traveling Preferences in Relationships

• Naomi writes: "My partner prefers traveling to places they've been with an ex. I want to explore new destinations together. Is this weird?"

Advice Provided:

• Both hosts agree it's reasonable to desire new experiences, advocating for open communication and respecting each other's travel aspirations.

Notable Quote:

• Tig Notaro [19:10]: "There’s nothing wrong with wanting to go someplace and make our special memories together."
• Atsuko Okatsuka [19:26]: "That should be heard and respected."

Question 3: Handling Mispronunciation of Names by Authority Figures

• Frazzled writes: "My principal mispronounces and misspells my name. How can I address this without causing workplace tension?"

Advice Provided:

• Tig recommends creating a fun and memorable way to pronounce the name, making the correction less confrontational.
• Atsuko shares creative methods to ensure names are pronounced correctly, emphasizing the importance of respect.

Notable Quote:

• Tig Notaro [22:07]: "Think of somebody saying, is there tar? And then you say, no tar."
• Atsuko Okatsuka [22:22]: "Make it fun for the principal."

Question 4: Struggling to Keep Up on Group Hikes

• Alina writes: "I find it hard to keep up with my friends on hikes. How should I handle this without slowing them down?"

Advice Provided:

• Tig suggests being upfront about personal hiking paces and proposing alternative plans if needed.
• Atsuko emphasizes honest communication and the value of enjoying nature at one's own speed.

Notable Quote:

• Tig Notaro [25:01]: "Nobody's gonna want to bear to see you struggling."
• Atsuko Okatsuka [25:57]: "Don't put so much on a conversation like that. People will understand."

Behind-the-Scenes Insights and Final Thoughts

As the episode winds down, Atsuko reflects on the best advice she has received, complimenting Tig on her communication tips in stand-up. The hosts share a moment of appreciation for each other’s comedic talents, reinforcing the episode's warm and supportive atmosphere.

Notable Quote:

• Atsuko Okatsuka [26:32]: "You just said, don't ever say recently when you're about to start a joke."
• Tig Notaro [26:57]: "Wow."

Closing and Listener Engagement

Tig encourages listeners to submit their questions through various channels, promoting engagement and community interaction. Atsuko plugs her comedy endeavors, and the episode concludes with uplifting music and final acknowledgments to the production team.

Notable Quote:

• Tig Notaro [27:50]: "Don't Ask Tig is a production of American Public Media. And as always, thanks Dana. And I'll tell Becky."

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Key Takeaways

• Emotional Resilience: Both hosts emphasize the importance of moving forward in relationships by embracing new opportunities and self-reflection.
• Effective Communication: Clear and creative communication strategies are highlighted as essential for resolving misunderstandings and personal challenges.
• Personal Growth: The episode underscores the value of personal boundaries and self-awareness in maintaining healthy relationships and friendships.
• Humor as a Coping Mechanism: Tig and Atsuko showcase how humor can be a powerful tool in navigating life's complexities and unexpected situations.

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Stay Connected Listeners are encouraged to send in their questions via donasktig.org or call 833-275-8444 (833-ASK-TIG4) to participate in future episodes.

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This summary provides a comprehensive overview of the "Don't Ask Tig" encore episode featuring Atsuko Okatsuka, capturing the essence of their discussions, shared experiences, and the heartfelt advice offered to listeners.

Transcript

[Tig Notaro]

If your small business is booming and ready to expand, you might say something like, it's happening.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Crushed it.

[Tig Notaro]

But if you need someone who can actually help protect your growing business, just say, like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. And just like that, your State Farm agent can help you get the coverage you need for your new space for your small business insurance needs. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Hey, Danas and Beckys. What you're about to hear is an encore presentation of one of our favorite episodes from the Don't Ask Tig archives. Please enjoy. Are you ready, Atsuka?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I'm ready, Tig.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, we're about to get into it. This is Don't Ask Tig. I'm Tig Notaro.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

We are not alone Nobody is hopeless Everybody goes to we got a friend in T. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Here to help me today is Otsuka Oka. Is that right?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's right. Hi. Yes. Thank you. Yeah, it's. Thank you so much. My husband just brought me energy pills.

[Tig Notaro]

What are energy pills? Is that just straight up drugs?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, right. Just quote unquote energy pills.

[Tig Notaro]

Energy pills.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's like a Japanese pill that my grandma just like smuggled back one time and yeah, I think it's supposed to be vitamin B stuff, but you know.

[Tig Notaro]

We have that here in the States. Just regular vitamin B. Yeah, we have vitamins.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's the thing, Tig. I think maybe there's like another ingredient in it that I just can't read.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, okay.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You know, I see. You know what I'm saying?

[Tig Notaro]

I know exactly what you're saying now.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

You're a stand up and you're the host of let's Go Otsuka. Atsco. Are you okay at school?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. Yeah, that was good. You know, I actually named the show let's Go Otsuko so that people would hopefully see the pattern.

[Tig Notaro]

Not me. All right, you're a standup and the host of let's Go Atsuko. So your show, it includes your version of Japanese game shows. Do you have a favorite game show?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, some classics. There's this Japanese game show that you maybe you've seen clips of. It's just people like taking bites of what looks like just regular objects and they have to. They don't know until they bite into it whether it's a food or not.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Do you know about that?

[Tig Notaro]

I. I just learned about it. Just a second.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It's. It's called Candy or Not Candy. So like, for example, like your microphone, you know, before you start recording this podcast you know, the producers will be like, okay, Tig, in three seconds, three, two. We're going to count down and then you're going to take a bite of that microphone. And it might be just a microphone or it might be cake. That's it.

[Tig Notaro]

And where can I see this? On YouTube.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, it's just called Candy or not Candy. I can see you thriving on that show, honestly.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, that actually feels like if I were to watch a game show, that's what I would watch. When I was little, I was very generically into the Price is Right, and my brother and I used to play Prices right when we were about three and four.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

So you would just hold up objects and guess how much it cost to each other?

[Tig Notaro]

Nope.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh.

[Tig Notaro]

One of us would go to the end of the hall and the other one would go to the opposite end of the hall. And then my brother would yell, tig Notaro, come on down. And I would raise my arms and scream and run down the hallway of my house. And then I would yell for my brother to come on down. And we would do that over and over and over.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's amazing. You were practicing for like being a star. You were being called down and it was your moment. You know, game shows. I also love watching like the weird things that go wrong or like the happy accidents. You know, my friend actually was on Prices is right. She's a comedian. She's in a wheelchair and she got called up. She got the price right, and guess what she. She won a wheelchair. A treadmill.

[Tig Notaro]

George, what do we got for couple of prizes? Danielle, we've got a treadmill and a.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

New sauna, I kid you not.

[Tig Notaro]

And what did they say when this happened?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I think cut to commercial. What else would could you do?

[Tig Notaro]

That is insanity. Yeah, they should have backup stuff for sure.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

For sure.

[Tig Notaro]

Like they would be, I need to produce this show.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You'd be so good. I mean, you seem to know it.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm a real hard ass and I feel like I could really make it right. Yeah, make the price right.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Make the prize right.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, make the prize right. Wow. That's what I was looking for.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I'm so glad you had me on. I'm glad. We figured out a lot of stuff already.

[Tig Notaro]

We really have now. You know what I figured out is that you were doing a stand up set during an earthquake. Is this true?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

It happened. It was that. I don't know if you remember, last year, July 4th, there was an earthquake. And then the 5th, there was another one just back to back. I was just. I was just at the Ice House and in Pasadena, and I. I went up on the Comedy Club, which is a comedy club. I got called in and I went up on stage dancing. That's when the audience started screaming. And then people started screaming, earthquake, Earthquake.

[Tig Notaro]

But, see, I would have thought they were chanting for the comedian, earthquake. Yes, I do.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I do that. Would you really. That's. That would be really. That would be kind of sucky to go up and they're like, we want another comedian, specifically.

[Tig Notaro]

I've had that happen. What's the worst thing that's happened to you during a set? Is it an earthquake? Or is it something where an entire audience requests a different comedian?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I mean, that would be worse for sure. Because an earthquake, you can maneuver, but people's feelings about you when you are the person there to entertain, that's really bad. No one's done that, have they? Do you to be like, what? They haven't.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, they haven't named. They haven't named specific comedians, but they've wished that I was not the one that was chosen on the stage.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Well, you know, I was actually in a similar situation when I actually had to replace you on a lineup. When I replaced you on a lineup in Vegas. It was for the Believer Fest.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, wait, did you tell me this one time?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I did, yeah. It was run by Joey Sulloway, and they were like. They were like, tig canceled. You're gonna have to replace her. And I said, okay, as long as everyone. Everyone else knows, like, in the audience, that would be cool. And Joey had forgotten to tell. I just went on stage and I was like, hi, it's me. Like, not. Not Tig. Like, it's.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And were you doing stand up?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah, I was just doing stand up. Yeah, I was doing stand up. Yeah. As not Tig as atsuka. Okotuka.

[Tig Notaro]

And how did that show go?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I think I did really great. You know, I mean, it's not. They're gonna be. They're not gonna be necessarily pissed. They were maybe disappointed because it said it was gonna.

[Tig Notaro]

No, they were pissed. I heard about this. Now, the more you talk about it, I do remember.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You're right. You just said you didn't know what you were. You were just. You didn't know what I was talking about. Now you suddenly remember.

[Tig Notaro]

I do. The people were very upset. People were very upset that I was not there and that you were there. I enjoy you tremendously. I think you're so funny. You're. You have a very, very exciting way of looking at Things. And your comedy. It's all of that in. In your comedy, too. And as much as I'm teasing you, it's because I love you. Now, should we. Should we get into these questions? We have a few people that are waiting for us to help them.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You're right.

[Tig Notaro]

This first question Jane writes, how do I get over someone who I dumped but now realize was my soulmate? He wants nothing to do with me. It's been three years, and I'm still sad.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, my goodness. Wow.

[Tig Notaro]

I think maybe she should look and see if. If she has a pattern of push and pull in her. In her life, because a lot of times that can happen. When. When even if you're the one that breaks up with somebody, if somebody moves on, that's what might be making Jane think that it's her soulmate. It's not that that's the actual soul mate. It's that it's kind of an ego blow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, that makes sense. Yeah. It's just. Don't. You know, what is that? Don't it always seem to go, you don't know what you have till it's gone? Is that the same kind of theory or, like, kind of concept? Concept.

[Tig Notaro]

I. I think so. But it doesn't mean that that was your soulmate.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

True, true, true. Right.

[Tig Notaro]

Because if it is your soulmate, I think when you're with that person, it should reveal itself so clearly not when they're gone.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Right.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know if I believe in soulmates.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. I for sure don't. Yeah. And. Yeah. And I'm married, but.

[Tig Notaro]

Right. I am, too. And I feel. I was just saying to Stephanie the other day that there's probably a handful of other people that I would be equally as or maybe even more compatible with than I am with you. But the fact that we connected and we are so compatible, we make each other laugh so hard, and we live similarly and move about the world very similarly. I am thrilled beyond belief that I'm stuck with you. You know, that's what it is.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And it's also being appreciative of the present. And that is pretty cool the way you said it, which is, it could have been anybody.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, no, that's not what I said. No.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I know I'm really bad at summarizing.

[Tig Notaro]

Things, but I'm saying if there's 20 quazillion people.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

In the world, there's probably like five. That I would connect with.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

As deeply and as well as I do with Stephanie.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Right.

[Tig Notaro]

But I'm thrilled that it's Stephanie.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. You know, you're better at words than me because I tried to say something like that to my husband once, and it came off more like, well, you know, we just happen to be, like, live pretty close to each other, like, things like that, you know, like, oh, yeah, I could have. There's probably, like, yes, something like that. You know, like three other people in the world maybe that I could have been compatible with, but they just, like, live in Australia or something, and I would have never met them. I said, it's something more like that.

[Tig Notaro]

All the loves of your life live in Australia.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Australia probably, like, who knows, right? Paris. Isn't that a romantic place? You know? And I feel like I need to say something to help. This was Jane out a little.

[Tig Notaro]

This is Jane. This is Jane.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You know, don't listen to me, but if the person's not contacting you back and doesn't want anything to do with you to save yourself more heartache. Yeah. I mean, for me, it's always helped to move on if I would just find a new person. But that's maybe that's terrible.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, no, it's true. Because nothing helps get over a love like a new love.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Jane. Good luck. I truly know how hard heartache and heartbreaks. Heart destruction can be. Yeah, we both do. You've been sad before, right?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

You've had your heart stomped on.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes. Yeah. And. Yeah, again, you know, that's why I looked elsewhere. And it's not just distraction, but it's kind of. You know, sometimes when, like, someone's pet dies and, you know, they're like, I'm not ready for another one. Cause it's gonna remind me of whatever the dog's name was, you know, Dr. Becky Hines. It's gonna remind me of Dr. Becky Hines. And I'm gonna always be comparing this new dog to Dr. Becky Hines. But the truth is, unless you're, like, truly incapable of feeling feelings, you're not gonna be seeing this new dog acting so cute and be like, you're nothing like Dr. You know what I mean? When a dog in front of you is, you know, wagging its tail and being cute and playing fetch with you, you're gonna appreciate that dog and maybe start falling in love with that dog. So it's kind of like that, I.

[Tig Notaro]

Think, well, let's not fall in love with dogs, but hang in there, Jane. And we have more questions coming up. We'll be right.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

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[Tig Notaro]

I just thought it was a God.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

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[Tig Notaro]

Otsuko Our next question is about traveling.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

All right.

[Tig Notaro]

It's an old fashioned thing we did before the pandemic, right?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yes. Let's go somewhere.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's go somewhere with our second question. Naomi writes, my partner and I have been together for two years and we both love traveling. My problem is that when they bring up the places they want to go, it's usually places they've already been with their ex. I can't help but feel like they're trying to relive something from a past relationship. Is it weird that I just want to go to new places neither of us have gone? Will I sound insecure if I bring this up?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, wow, wow. I don't think so. Well, also, you did bring it up on air and assuming maybe sometimes your partner asks, what are you listening to on your podcast? They might hear this question.

[Tig Notaro]

Best way to handle that situation, though, is to go, oh, nothing.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's what you're saying is the best way? Just a big cough? A fake?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, yeah, if somebody, if somebody asks what you're listening To. It's good to just nothing.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Take that is classically like a kind of the way you sound guilty.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, then I don't know. I've been using that for years.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

And people fall for it. They go, oh, yeah, she really is up to nothing.

[Tig Notaro]

I guess so. I thought so. But I could be wrong.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No. You said no. I would be like, wow, Tig, you. You sound sick. Are you okay or something? If you. If you laugh.

[Tig Notaro]

Here, try it. Ask me.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Tig, what are you doing?

[Tig Notaro]

Nothing. See, I would just follow it up with that.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Then I'm gonna ask again. I'm gonna ask again. Tig, what is it that you're trying not to tell me?

[Tig Notaro]

What? Nothing.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You're hiding something from me. That's how I would react. No, see, that felt more natural than. No, no. I love the nothing. Because it's just like it's. Yeah, it's a classic.

[Tig Notaro]

It's a classic something.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

But. But the question at hand here. Right?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I personally feel like there is nothing wrong than saying I want to go someplace and make our special memories together.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I agree.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, there's only so many cities and towns on this planet.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Right.

[Tig Notaro]

But why not go where your own relationship is? Is drawing you to your current relationship.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. And that includes you, the person who wants to go places that you know, weren't with your ex. And that's something that, you know, I think should be heard and respected.

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely. Absolutely. Couldn't have said it better.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Wow.

[Tig Notaro]

Safe travels, Naomi. Safe travels in one to five years, depending on the pandemic.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Right, Right, right, right, right.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, our next question came from someone who just signed their name as Frazzled. Okay. Yeah. Frazzled writes, my principal regularly mispronounces my name and spells it wrong. I don't want to vex her since she has the power to make my work life unhappy, but her disrespect is starting to get annoying. How can I best deal with this issue? Well, this is a perfect question for a show that began with the discussion of mispronunciations.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, it's. You know, in the past, I didn't make a big deal about it. I still don't. But I do like correct people now. Only because in the past, I didn't want to offend people. I used to be more of a people pleaser, and more and more people talked about their experience. I was like, you know what? It's okay to be like, yeah, it's pronounced this way. And actually, more and more, as more and more people came out talking about their frustrations Right. Other people would ask how to pronounce my name. Like you did, you know, like, before you introduced me or something.

[Tig Notaro]

That wasn't always a thing with the last name Notaro. People say notaro or notoro or notoro or whatever. Whatever they say. What I do is I say, think of somebody saying, is there tar? And then you say, no tar. And then the other person says, oh, that's correct. No tar. Oh, see?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No, I love that.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank you.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

A performance artist did this kind of thing for me because I was like, I don't know how to explain my last name without it just being boring. Just like, oh, it's blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And they were like, oh, just, yeah, it's O. And then like, cats. Literally cats. And then ska, like the music genre. And I was like, okatsuka. Okatsuka. But it's more Okhotsuka. So I don't know.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, so like a Kot.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Oh, yes. More caught. Not a cat. Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

Like a. Like lying down on a cot. A Kotska.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

There it is. Yeah, it's that. Yeah. So maybe. Yeah, that's a great. That's great advice, actually. Make it fun for the principal.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, yeah. And you can you get a fun visual that comes along with it, because now I'll picture somebody lying on a cot listening to ska. Oh, cot.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Ska. Right.

[Tig Notaro]

So that's. My advice is come up with a fun way to say your name and be. Be direct with the conversation and present it with, oh, here's a funny way that people have learned my name. I bet you'll get a better reaction instead of just.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Just, you're fired. Or yes. Or, like, don't talk to me ever again.

[Tig Notaro]

Exactly. I bet it'll be better than that.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

I think so, too.

[Tig Notaro]

Get the respect you deserve. I mean, your name is frazzled. How hard is it to pronounce Frazzled? All right, we have one final listener question. Do you consider yourself outdoorsy?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Not at all, actually.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, this last question comes from. And how funny to follow up our last question with this. I don't know how to pronounce her name. Oh, Alina. A L, I, N A.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

A L, I N A. Oh, man. I'm gonna guess Alina.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's go with Alina.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

All right. My friends are very outd and, like, going on long, strenuous hikes. I really struggle to keep up with them sometimes, but don't want to slow down the pace. What should I do when I'm all tuckered out on these hikes? I'm going to throw it to you, my friend. That sounds like your wheelhouse, Tig.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Is it because I said I'm not an outdoorsy person?

[Tig Notaro]

That's exactly why.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, it's, it's. People have learned to go with my pace. And that's maybe what your friends have to do is realize the kind of friend you are and the kind of hiker you are and they have to go with your pace or they should do their own fast hike. And then when they hang with you, they do a slower pace stroll. Is this crazy, Tig? I. I just.

[Tig Notaro]

No. Here's the thing is, I'm always confused when people say that they're scared to say certain things or hurt someone's feelings or. I think these are your friends. They're not going to want you to be panting and struggling and.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Or left behind. Yeah, right.

[Tig Notaro]

And they're not going to want to bear to. You know what happened to Alina? A bear at her. You know, we weren't willing to slow down.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And getting our steps in at a certain pace was more important. So, you know. Yeah, nobody's gonna be like that. And my style is if somebody's saying, let's go on a hike, I'm very quick to say things like, hey, I like a leisurely stroll. If you guys are fast hikers, I'll meet you at the picnic table at the bottom of the hill. Don't put so much on a conversation like that. People will understand.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And who are these people that are so into a fast paced hike that they're cutting friends off left and right? Yeah, you can't keep up.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's what I say. I'm sure there are people like that. Maybe that is why Alina is scared. But I would say that's the psychotic thing to do, to go extreme hiking every single time, you know?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, it's just take a.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Take a second. Don't you want to look at a tree?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, look at a tree.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Look at it.

[Tig Notaro]

You are right. Stop and look at a tree.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

What are you in a rush for? We're in this pandemic for another.

[Tig Notaro]

What is their problem? Lunatics. All right, Elena, Enjoy the outdoors at your own pace. Before we go, what is the best advice you've ever gotten in your life?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

The best advice I've ever gotten in my life. I do remember an advice you gave me one time.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, what'd I tell you?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

You just said, don't ever say recently when you're about to start a joke, and it's actually very true. And like, it's it's worked.

[Tig Notaro]

Wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Instead of being.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm so glad.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah. Like recently I did this. Recently. No, just say you did this or you say you did that. Say you saw something. Instead of recently I saw. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Wow.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah, that was pretty cool.

[Tig Notaro]

All right, well, I can't tell you how much I appreciate you coming on this, this silly, silly show. And do you have anything you'd like to. To plug?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

No. People just can find me at oddscope Comedy if they wanted to see what I'm up to. And that's it. And thank you so much for having me. This is so fun.

[Tig Notaro]

Of course, listeners out there, you can send in your own [e-mail] and we might try to answer them on a future episode. Or we have a brand new option to send us questions. You can now call 833-275-8444. That's 833-ASK-TIG4 and leave me a voicemail. Again, don't ask tig.org to reach us with your questions.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank you for coming.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Thanks so much. Oh my sweet child there's so much I want you to know oh, my sweet child there's so much I want you to see I wish that I could give you the answer I wish that I could make you believe I wish that I could put you on your path and set you free that's what your heart is for that's what your heart is for that's what your heart is for Listen to your heart.

[Tig Notaro]

Don't Ask Tig is hosted by me, Tig Notaro. It's produced by Thomas Willette, Mary Knoth and Tracy Mumford. Our editor is Phyllis Fletcher. Executive producer, Lauren D. Engineering and sound mixing by Eric Ramani. Digital production by Christina Lopez. Talent booking by Marianne Ways. Production assistants by Nancy Shue. Our theme music is Friend in Tig by Edie Brickell and Kyle Krusham and Listen to youo Heart by Edie Brickell. Special thanks to Hunter Seidman, Lily Kim and Alex Shaffer. Our executive consultant is Dean Cappello and Gobsmack Studios. You can always ask for [e-mail] just write in with your problem or send us a voice memo. You can also follow us on social media on'tasktig Don't Ask Tig is a production of American Public Media. And as always, thanks Dana. And I'll tell Becky.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That's what your heart is for Listen to your heart.

[Tig Notaro]

The Soul to Story podcast is about how teaching kids to read went wrong. But now we have a story about a school district where things are going very right.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Let me make sure my friends are sitting crisscross applesauce, hands in their lap. I've never had a child that couldn't read.

[Tig Notaro]

How did they do it?

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

When I tell some of my other.

[Tig Notaro]

Colleagues that may be at other schools.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

That this is what I do, and they would say, you kidding me?

[Tig Notaro]

New episodes of Sold a Story are available now in your podcast.

[Atsuko Okatsuka]

Apparently.