BONUS - Eggs and Bunnies (Nick Carter & Nero Wolfe)

Summary

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Down These Mean Streets (Old Time Radio Detectives)

BONUS – Eggs and Bunnies (Nick Carter & Nero Wolfe)

Date: April 2, 2026
Host: Mean Streets Podcasts

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Episode Overview

In this special Easter-themed bonus episode, the host offers a double feature of classic Golden Age radio detective stories, each centering (loosely) on eggs and rabbits—reinvented as devices of danger and intrigue rather than holiday cheer. The featured plays are Nick Carter, Master Detective in “The Case of the Chemical Chickens” (April 13, 1947), and The New Adventures of Nero Wolfe in “The Case of the Brave/Friendly Rabbit” with Sydney Greenstreet. The episode promises “an early Easter basket full of old-time radio mystery.” While the stories themselves are whimsical and filled with deductive bravado, beneath them lies a meditation on detection, misdirection, and the peculiar dangers lurking within the everyday.

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Key Episodes and Segments

1. Introduction: Easter with Explosive Eggs and Deadly Rabbits

• Timestamp: [00:56–01:53]
• The host frames the episode as an unconventional celebration of Easter, featuring crime stories about “exploding eggs and rabbits on a farm that also houses a corpse.”
• Sets up the stories as a seasonal treat, “an early Easter basket full of old-time Radio Mystery.”

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2. Nick Carter, Master Detective — “The Case of the Chemical Chickens”

First Aired: April 13, 1947

Main Plot & Developments

• “The eggs are the exploding variety...” ([00:56])
• Waldo believes he’s been poisoned by eggs at breakfast. Nick Carter investigates and discovers:
  • The eggs contain nitroglycerin (“They had nitroglycerin in them.” — Nick Carter [02:27])
  • The chickens themselves, unknowingly, are laying the explosive eggs due to polluted water on a farm near a criminal chemical plant.
  • Multiple threads: counterfeiting operation, criminal attempts to silence witnesses, and cover-ups involving posing as health inspectors.

Notable Scenes & Quotes

• Explosive Revelation:
  “The eggs were laid by chemical chickens.” — Nick Carter ([02:36])
• Science of Chickens:
  “Chickens are funny birds. What they eat goes into the eggs they lay.” — Nick Carter ([08:30])
• Counterfeit Angle:
  “That $5 bill he offered me looked phony. Is this a counterfeiting case?” — Patsy ([06:42])
• The Setup and Cover-Up:
  “Looks like a phony setup...I’m sure the man in there isn’t Bleecker...he’s a crook posing as Bleecker.” — Nick ([06:28–06:35])
• Undercover Work:
  Patsy goes undercover as a tough dame: “Disguise myself as a tough, in other words.” — Patsy ([07:48])

Investigation Details

• Attempts to buy more eggs lead Nick and the team to investigate the source, encountering counterfeit money and imposters.
• Discovery of the real grocer (Bleecker) tied up and nearly killed, evidence of a larger criminal ring.

Science & Forensics

• Micro-detective Work:
  Nick vacuums dust from the suspect's clothes to analyze their origin: “Find particular kinds of dust in particular localities...That’s what I’m counting on.” — Nick ([15:06])
  • Finds smelter dust, flour dust, dry hay; ties the criminal operation to a small industrial/farming town: Brickton.

Farm Confrontation

• Nick, Patsy, and Waldo fan out, using clever ruses (including marked dollar bills) to tease out the delivery route for the explosive eggs.
• Waldo stumbles into a trap after being recognized and is captured by the crooks' accomplice impersonating a health inspector ([18:14–21:08]).
• The crooks set a deadly trap for Nick and Patsy, intending to eliminate them in staged accidents.

Climax and Resolution

• Sheriff Stickney intervenes with authority; Nick turns the tables from a surprise vantage.
  • “The only accident I’m going to have is to pull the trigger of this tommy gun.” — Nick Carter ([24:09])
• The criminal ring is exposed and arrested.
• Nick explains how he detected the impostor:
  “Three things...couldn’t find any record of an inspector...health inspector working up here sounded phony...she claimed to recognize Waldo’s car as one rented for a stranger...” — Nick Carter ([25:11–25:29])

Final Notes

• Light banter about the perils of eggs, the hazards faced (including Waldo’s bumbling but comic heroism), and a salute to Boys Clubs of America.

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3. The New Adventures of Nero Wolfe — “The Case of the Friendly Rabbit”

Main Plot & Developments

• Murder and Subterfuge on a Rabbit Farm ([29:37+])
  • A state governor’s crime committee is plagued by leaks; suspicion centers on a committee secretary, Collier, now raising rabbits in the country.
  • Archie Goodwin (Wolfe’s assistant) investigates the farm, meets Collier’s ex-fiancé Claire, and uncovers layers of deceit involving gambling kingpin Veek and his henchman.
  • The farm serves as cover for secret rendezvous; murdered bodies appear, and a rabbit dies in notably suspicious circumstances.

Notable Scenes & Quotes

• Wolfe’s Reluctance:
  “Greatest detective in the world. Only trouble is, he is.” — Archie ([30:07])
  • Classic Wolfe: “I dislike exercise. Shortens life.” ([43:41])
• Archie’s Quipping:
  “Honey, I’ve been lied to by experts, and you’re not one.” — Archie Goodwin ([42:06])
• Rabbits as Clues:
  “Many hutches. ... Notice they’re all cowering at the far end of the pen...One of them...seems to be friendly...he’s dead. Somebody stove in his skull.” — Archie & Wolfe ([50:05–50:33])
  • “He may be dead now, Archie, but he was friendly. Too friendly.” — Wolfe ([50:36])

Key Turning Points

• Archie and Wolfe piece together that Collier has been communicating with the criminal mastermind Veek via innocuous-seeming carrot deliveries by truck.
• A murder happens in the farmhouse; suspicion falls on Collier, but Wolfe deduces from details (such as Marshall's dirty fingernails, incongruous to his otherwise natty appearance) that the real killer is Veek, who sought to silence both Collier and his own henchman.
  • “The dirty fingernails were a wrong note...” — Wolfe ([55:23])
• Wolfe confronts the villain with his own knowledge and turns an attempted frameup into a confession.

Themes and Resolution

• Wolfe unpacks the layers of the misdirection—explaining how the “friendly” dead rabbit signaled the burial spot of Collier’s body.
• Final scene hints at new romance for Archie even as Wolfe, ever the curmudgeon, reminds him:
  “As you go up to bed now...you might remember that rosebuds have thorns.” — Wolfe ([56:48])

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• “The eggs were laid by chemical chickens.” — Nick Carter ([02:36])
• “Crime is a sucker’s road, and those who travel it wind up in...prison or the grave.” — Nick Carter ([00:00])
• “I dislike exercise. Shortens life.” — Nero Wolfe ([43:41])
• “I think you’re going to be quite surprised.” — Wolfe to Archie ([38:34])
• Archie’s banter with Claire:
  • “Gather ye rosebuds while ye may...” — Archie ([40:59])
  • “Robert Herrick wrote that.” — Claire ([41:03])
  • “Dr. Titmouse is a liar.” — Archie ([41:05])

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Notable Timestamps

• [00:56–01:53] — Host’s introduction and setup for the “eggs and rabbits” theme
• [02:25–02:43] — The explosive egg discovery in Nick Carter
• [08:30–08:42] — Science of how tainted eggs betray criminal activity
• [15:06–16:04] — Forensic dust analysis breakthroughs
• [18:14–21:08] — Confrontation at the farm; Waldo’s capture
• [24:09–24:15] — Carter’s rooftop showdown: “The only accident I’m going to have...”
• [25:11–25:29] — Carter’s summary of how he unmasked the impostor
• [29:37+] — Beginning of Nero Wolfe segment
• [30:07] — Archie’s introduction of Wolfe: “Greatest detective in the world...”
• [50:05–50:36] — The dead rabbit clue and Wolfe’s deduction
• [55:12–55:33] — The telltale dirty fingernails
• [56:48] — Wolfe’s parting wisdom: “Rosebuds have thorns.”

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Tone & Style

• Nick Carter: Pacy, hardboiled, punctuated by sharp exchanges and banter, particularly between Nick, Waldo, and Patsy.
• Nero Wolfe: Wry, erudite, filled with dry humor and intellectual puzzles, balanced by Archie Goodwin’s lighthearted wisecracks.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This bonus episode is a showcase of old-time radio’s knack for blending the everyday (eggs for breakfast, rabbits on a farm) with danger and detective inventiveness. Whether it’s Nick Carter unraveling a criminal plot hatched in chemical-polluted henhouses or Nero Wolfe reading murder in the behavior of rabbits, these tales offer both crackling suspense and gently comic character work. Listeners are treated to a brisk tour of classic detective methods— forensics, undercover disguises, psychological deduction—alongside snappy dialogue and a nostalgic sense of radio theater at its best.

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End of summary.

Transcript

[Nick Carter]

Get this and get it straight. Crime is a sucker's road, and those who travel it wind up in the gut of the prison of the grave.

[Narrator]

The story you are about to hear is true.

[Nick Carter]

Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent.

[Announcer]

The Adventures of Sam Spade Detective the

[Nick Carter]

Adventures of the Saint.

[Vincent Price]

Starring Vincent Price.

[Nick Carter]

Bob Bailey in the exciting adventures of

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

the man with the action packed expense account, America's fabulous freelance insurance investigator.

[Nick Carter]

Yours truly, Johnny Doll.

[Podcast Host]

Hello, and welcome to a bonus episode of down these Mean Streets. Easter is only a few days away, and in honor of the holiday, I have a pair of mysteries involving eggs and rabbits, though not exactly the ones we typically think of at this time of year. The eggs are the exploding variety, as Nick Carter discovers in the Case of the chemical chickens from April 13, 1947. And the rabbits live on a farm that also houses a corpse. In the Case of the Brave Rabbit from the New Adventures of Nero Wolf. I'll be back on Sunday with our next regular episode. But for now, I hope you enjoy this early Easter basket full of old time Radio Myster.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

Old Dutch Cleanser, famous for chasing dirt, presents Nick Carter, famous for chasing crime. Every week at this time, two great names are joined as Old Dutch Klinter brings you one of the most resourceful and daring characters in all detective fiction. Nick Carter, Master Detective.

[Patsy Bowen]

What's the matter with those eggs Waldo had for breakfast, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

They had nitroglycerin in them.

[Patsy Bowen]

What? Someone put nitroglycerin in the eggs?

[Nick Carter]

No.

[Patsy Bowen]

What then? How to get in?

[Nick Carter]

The chickens that laid these eggs put the explosive in.

[Patsy Bowen]

What?

[Nick Carter]

The eggs were laid by chemical chickens.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

And now, the Case of the Chemical Chickens. Today's adventure with Nick Carter, brought to you by Old Dutch Cleanser in Nick's office. He and Patsy are busy with the morning reports.

[Nick Carter]

Take this letter, Patsy.

[Patsy Bowen]

Right, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

To Mr. Jason Griggs. Dear sir, enclosed you will find a photograph taken on infrared film proving the will in question.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Nick boy, I've been poisoned. If you don't save me, I'm a dead man.

[Nick Carter]

Now, Walter, look, we're too busy for

[Waldo McGlynn]

practical jokes, but I'm feeling fast. If you don't find me an antidote, I'll be dead in two minutes.

[Patsy Bowen]

What have you got in that bowl?

[Waldo McGlynn]

Eggs. Poisoned eggs. And I ate one of them.

[Nick Carter]

Are you kidding, Waldo?

[Waldo McGlynn]

No, no, Nick. Some criminals have poisoned these eggs I was having for me breakfast. They're after me, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Nonsense.

[Waldo McGlynn]

They've been poisoned, Nick. Smell of them here.

[Nick Carter]

All right, by George. Sit down, Waldo.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Sit down. Or is it too Late, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

No, you're not dying, if that's what you mean. Have to make a chemical analysis to be sure. But you may have stumbled onto something, Waldo.

[Patsy Bowen]

Find anything, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

Not sure yet.

[Claire]

Oh.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Patsy, get your pad. This is the last will and testament of Waldo Aloysius McGlynn. Who departs this world foully murdered by his enemies.

[Nick Carter]

Quiet, Walter. You haven't been poisoned.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Then what's in them eggs?

[Nick Carter]

Nitroglycerin.

[Patsy Bowen]

The explosive.

[Waldo McGlynn]

I had dynamite for me.

[Nick Carter]

Breakfast in minute quantities? Yes.

[Patsy Bowen]

Someone put nitroglycerin in the eggs.

[Nick Carter]

No. The chickens that laid these eggs put it in, huh, Nick?

[Patsy Bowen]

Are you joking?

[Nick Carter]

I'm not. These eggs were laid by chemical chickens. And nitro isn't a thing that chickens can pick up anywhere. Think I'll look into this.

[Patsy Bowen]

What do you think's going on, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

Can't tell you. But here's what we'll do. We'll all go to the store where Waldo's landlady bought these eggs. We'll each buy as many as we can carry. And bring them back here and test them. Who knows? Maybe we'll find crooks in our Omega.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Yeah, this is the place, Nick. Bleakish Grocery.

[Nick Carter]

Now, those eggs were large brown eggs. Go in separately and order five dozen each. I'll go first, Waldo next, Patsy last. Right.

[Patsy Bowen]

Okay.

[Nick Carter]

Right. All right, I'm going in now. Follow me after a few minutes, Waldo. Sure.

[Eddie Tyler]

Okay, bud. How many dozen eggs you here for?

[Nick Carter]

About five.

[Eddie Tyler]

Five dozen eggs and a bucket dozen. Here's your dough. Five bucks.

[Nick Carter]

Hey, what's this for?

[Eddie Tyler]

It's the payoff. But I'm shelling out for the bum eggs I sold this morning.

[Janet Steele]

I beg your pardon, sir. I'm Janet Steele, pure food inspector for the health department. If you'd like to register a complaint about the eggs sold by this man.

[Eddie Tyler]

Have a heart, lady. I'm handing this customer a five buck bill. What more do you want?

[Nick Carter]

No, no, you don't understand. I didn't buy any eggs this morning. I want to buy five dozen now.

[Eddie Tyler]

Ha, ha, I'm laughing. This dame already confiscated every egg in a joint.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Good morning, folks. Just dropped in to purchase a little hen fruit.

[Janet Steele]

No eggs in this store will be sold.

[Eddie Tyler]

That's right, mister. No eggs.

[Waldo McGlynn]

No eggs.

[Patsy Bowen]

You.

[Waldo McGlynn]

You. You got boxes of them back there.

[Janet Steele]

I've condemned every one of them.

[Nick Carter]

Looks as if we'll have to try some other place, my friend. Yeah, but why? Till we get some of these here.

[Patsy Bowen]

Say, Nick. What in the quiet.

[Nick Carter]

We couldn't buy any eggs. Let's get away from the store window. Want to go around, take a look in back of the store.

[Patsy Bowen]

What's this all about, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

Looks like a phony setup, Essie. Oh, I'm sure the man in there isn't Bleecker. Unless I miss my guess, he's a crook posing as Bleeker.

[Waldo McGlynn]

What makes you think so, Leaker.

[Nick Carter]

First place, the way he talked. Second place, by the money he offered me, I only got a quick look, but that $5 bill he offered me looked phony.

[Patsy Bowen]

Is this a counterfeiting case?

[Nick Carter]

It's worse. I'll explain in a few minutes. Right now I want to see what's happened to the real Bleeker. Now, let's see. Regular suburban, back alley. Garage behind the store. And here's the cellar entrance to the store. I think we better duck down into the cellar and look around. Get that door open, Waldo.

[Eddie Tyler]

Right, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Patsy, take a look in the garage, just to play safe.

[Patsy Bowen]

Right away, Nick.

[Waldo McGlynn]

This is a heavy door, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Get quiet. I'll give you a hand.

[Farmer Wilson]

Nick.

[Patsy Bowen]

Yes? Come in here, quick. Look what I found in the garage.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Holy smokes. It's a man all tied up and gagged.

[Nick Carter]

Rather be bleaker. Help me get these ropes off, Waldo.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Yeah, sure.

[Nick Carter]

Take off the gag, Patsy.

[Patsy Bowen]

Golly, I don't think he's breathing.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Maybe he's dead.

[Nick Carter]

No, no, he's still warm.

[Patsy Bowen]

Oh, thank heavens, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Here, quick, Waldo. Try artificial respiration. Yeah, there's one chance in a thousand we can save him.

[Waldo McGlynn]

All right, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Listen, Patsy, we're on a spot. Yeah, I've got to call Maddie for an ambulance and pull motor at once to give this man a chance. But when an ambulance arrives, the crook inside the store is going to catch on. You've got to help me.

[Patsy Bowen]

How?

[Nick Carter]

Take off your hat. Comb your hair into bangs. Make your face up heavily with plenty of lipstick.

[Patsy Bowen]

Disguise myself as a tough, in other words.

[Nick Carter]

Right. That thug in there hasn't seen you yet, so you can get away with it. Go into the store and get him out of there. Get him out by hook or crook and stay with him.

[Patsy Bowen]

Oh, trust me, Nick. I'll do it if I have to sing torch songs.

[Nick Carter]

Now, look, Nick, I'm pretty sore about this. What's the idea letting that mug in the grocery store get away? I didn't let him, Maddie. Patsy took him away. Do you realize that we can't bring Bleeker, too? It's a murder rap. It's more than just a murder rap, Mary. How are they doing with the pull motor, Waldo?

[Waldo McGlynn]

No, Luck yet. Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Nick, what's all this about poisoned eggs? Very simple. Chickens are funny birds. What they eat goes into the eggs they lay. For instance, if a chicken eats mothballs, its eggs smell of camphor. No kidding.

[Archie Goodwin]

Fact.

[Nick Carter]

Now, somewhere in the country, there are some chickens that have been drinking water polluted with nitroglycerin. What's that? The eggs Waldo had for breakfast had traces of nitroglycerin in them. So? Might have been an accident. But when I found an obvious thug posing as the grocer in the store where the eggs are bought, I knew it was something else somewhere. Mattie. Up in the farming country there's a crooked plant manufacturing supplies for criminals. Bootleg nitroglycerin for blasting safes. Counterfeit money. Probably everything that a crook can't buy legitimately. Holy smoke. And these polluted eggs are the giveaway to the planet, Right? Some of the nitro must have seeped out accidentally and polluted the water in a brook or something that runs through a chicken farm nearby. Well, I'll be darned. That's why I had to hold on to that thug without tipping my hand. He's got to lead us to that place. What's the pull motor stopping for? Matty?

[Waldo McGlynn]

The job is done. Nick, that man was practically dead when we found him. But he's alive now. You saved him.

[Nick Carter]

Oh, good, good. Waldo, can I question him?

[Waldo McGlynn]

O not. Not for two or three days. The doc says it's going to be tough enough just keeping him alive.

[Nick Carter]

Two or three days. Well, by that time, this whole mob may be a thousand miles away. It's all up to Patsy now. All we can do is go back to the office and wait for her to check.

[Patsy Bowen]

Hey, Eddie.

[Eddie Tyler]

Yep?

[Patsy Bowen]

Close that door, will you? I can't hear myself think.

[Eddie Tyler]

You're a funny babe. Okay.

[Patsy Bowen]

When you invite a lady to eat in a private dining room, she likes to be private.

[Eddie Tyler]

I never knew old man Bleecker had a good looking daughter like you. What a break for me, you coming into the store looking for her.

[Patsy Bowen]

How come you're minding the store for him? He didn't say he was going nowhere.

[Eddie Tyler]

He got a rush call. Had to see somebody about some garage business. He's gonna be plenty sore when he hears I closed up the place to go eat lunch with his knockout door.

[Patsy Bowen]

Aw, Eddie,

[Eddie Tyler]

ain't that waiter ever gonna bring you some food?

[Patsy Bowen]

I'll go call him. I'll get that punk moving.

[Eddie Tyler]

Okay, B. Important garage business. That's a good one.

[Nick Carter]

Bank already, babe?

[Janet Steele]

Hello, Tyler.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

Janet.

[Eddie Tyler]

I Thought you were the girl you brought.

[Janet Steele]

No, she's outside phoning, Tyler.

[Nick Carter]

Phoning.

[Janet Steele]

And five will get you ten she's calling a guy named Nick Carter.

[Nick Carter]

Nick Carter?

[Janet Steele]

Yes, Tyler. Nick Carter. The man who came into Bleecker's store to buy eggs this morning when I was posing as a health inspector. And that pretty face you're making up to belongs to Patsy Bowen, Carter's secretary.

[Eddie Tyler]

I knew it all the time.

[Janet Steele]

Janet, you're a liar.

[Eddie Tyler]

Well, don't worry about it, babe. I'll take care of that.

[Janet Steele]

Not for me, you won't. You're quitting the gang, Tyler. You're too dangerous to keep around.

[Eddie Tyler]

Janet.

[Janet Steele]

So long, Tyler.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

Eddie Tyler sprawls over the table, two bullets in his heart, as Janet Steele slips out of the private dining room. With Tyler dead, Nick's only lead in the case ends. We'll learn what he does next in just a moment. And now back to the case of the Chemical Chickens. Today's adventure with Nick Carter, brought to you by old Dutch Klenter. As we pick up our story, Nick Carter and Waldo have pulled up to the cafe in answer to Patsy's urgent telephone call.

[Farmer Wilson]

Nick.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Nick, this Patsy.

[Nick Carter]

Yes, what is it, Patsy?

[Waldo McGlynn]

Oh, Nick.

[Patsy Bowen]

Nick, it's too late. I've lost Tyler for good.

[Nick Carter]

He got away when you were phoning me?

[Patsy Bowen]

No. Someone killed him.

[Waldo McGlynn]

What killed him?

[Nick Carter]

Where's he now?

[Patsy Bowen]

In the back room. Strolled over the table. I went back and there he was.

[Nick Carter]

All right, Patsy, this is a tough break, but we'll manage. You get the car and wait.

[Patsy Bowen]

Right.

[Nick Carter]

Waldo, come with me.

[Archie Goodwin]

All right.

[Waldo McGlynn]

That must be the room back there, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Right. Come on. Keep your back to the door. No one comes in.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Right.

[Nick Carter]

Boy, Chance might have something in its pockets. No. No wallet, no papers, nothing.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Then we're stuck, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Not quite. There's one Chance. His pockets and his pants cuffs.

[Waldo McGlynn]

What are you ripping his pockets out for, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

You'll find out later. Now, this is what we do. You telephone Matty, tell him about this murder and join me at the lab.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Okay.

[Nick Carter]

Patsy goes to Bleecker's store to check the crates the tainted eggs were delivered in. Those crates are usually stenciled with the address of the farm that delivered them. Yeah, but if Patsy can find that address, it may tell us where Eddie Tyler came from. She can't. We'll have to depend on his pockets and the cuffs of his pants. All right. Hold that pocket steady, Walter.

[Nero Wolfe]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nick Carter]

Want to be sure this vacuum cleaner picks up every particle of dirt and grit. That's in it.

[Waldo McGlynn]

This one's clean now, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

All right, give me the cuff of the pants.

[Janet Steele]

Okay.

[Nick Carter]

Clean them out, too.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Look, I don't get it, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Hold it steady. All right, that's clean. Yeah. The other one. Okay. Oops. Careful. That's it. All right. All finished. Now, we open the vacuum cleaner and we have one porcelain trap filled with a sort of dust. Dust. And this dust is going under the microscope right now. Why? Going to tell us where Eddie Tyler's been during the past few weeks.

[Waldo McGlynn]

How the devil can dust do that, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

Use your head, Wardle.

[Patsy Bowen]

Yeah, but.

[Waldo McGlynn]

But there's dust in the air everywhere.

[Nick Carter]

But it's not all the same kind of dust. Find particular kinds of dust in particular localities. And that's what I'm counting.

[Waldo McGlynn]

You found anything yet, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

I think so. Huh, Patsy? No, it's the law. And darn good and sore, too, if

[Eddie Tyler]

you want to know.

[Nick Carter]

Find any Tyler, Mary? Nick, this is a fine mess. You let Tyler get away so you can break the case and he ends up a corpse. Oh, when the commissioner hears about this tomorrow morning, the case will be ended. By tomorrow morning?

[Waldo McGlynn]

Are you kidding?

[Nick Carter]

No, hoping. I've been checking the dust from Tyler's pockets.

[Claire]

What?

[Nick Carter]

Outside of ordinary dust, found almost everywhere, I've found smelter dust, flower dust and particles of dry hay, all in the deepest layers. That means Tyler's been living in a farming vicinity that also has an iron foundry and flour mill somewhere near. Give me that industrial map, Waldo.

[Archie Goodwin]

Right.

[Nick Carter]

Nick Carter speaking.

[Farmer Wilson]

Nick.

[Patsy Bowen]

Patsy, I've just finished searching Bleaka's store.

[Nick Carter]

Yes?

[Patsy Bowen]

It's no good, Nick. Every egg crate in the place has been destroyed. Not one left anywhere.

[Nick Carter]

Now, wait a minute. Yeah, this must be it, huh, Nick?

[Patsy Bowen]

What on earth are you talking about?

[Nick Carter]

I've been checking my industrial map while you were reporting, Patsy. Oh, Mantie, there's only one town in the near vicinity that's a farming center and at the same time has a flour mill and an iron foundry. That's Brickton. Brickton? That must be the place Tyler came from.

[Patsy Bowen]

I don't understand, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Oh, you will pretty soon. Hurry back to the office, Patsy. You, Waldo and I are driving up to Brickton right away.

[Patsy Bowen]

Brick and a half mile, Nick. That's what the sign said.

[Nick Carter]

Now, remember, we stay undercover in this town. There's a sheriff in here that hates the very sight of me.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Hey, did you have a run in with him before, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

Yeah, in the Joplin case last year. But it was. It was a run in with her.

[Patsy Bowen]

A lady sheriff like In Texas, Eh, tougher in Texas.

[Nick Carter]

Sheriff Moss Stickney is convinced I double crossed her last year. She'll do everything she can to obstruct me now. So we stay under cover, right? Now look, when we get into Brickton, you and Waldo each rent a car. Yeah. I've divided Brickton into three areas. Each one of us covers one of the areas.

[Patsy Bowen]

Uh, here's the town line, Nick.

[Nick Carter]

Uh huh. Now each of us visits every farm in our area and asks the farm owners if they deliver eggs to Bleecker in New York.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Yeah, but wait. Some of them farmers might not answer.

[Nick Carter]

Nick. Well, here are two $100 bills. You and Patsy each take one, huh? If you meet a close mouth farmer, tell him this hundred dollar bill was found in a crate of eggs delivered to Bleecker. He can collect if he has records proving delivery as of yesterday.

[Patsy Bowen]

Well, that ought to work. Oh, slow down, Nick. We're passing or rent a car garage.

[Nick Carter]

Uh oh, run by the terrible Ma Stickney. All right, go ahead. Each of you rent a car and we'll meet back here six o'clock tonight. Good.

[Nero Wolfe]

The we.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Well, well, well. This is farm number three for Detective Waldo McGlynn to examine with his piercing eyes. Wilson's farm. Maybe we'll have better luck with this one here. Ah, it is a farmer. It's a farmerette. I'm going to be questioning. Very pretty too. In them pants.

[Sheriff Stickney]

You.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Just a minute there, young lady.

[Nick Carter]

Yes?

[Waldo McGlynn]

How would you like to earn 100? It's the health inspector.

[Farmer Wilson]

Oh, I've seen you before, haven't I? In Bleecker's grocery this morning.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Well, ma', am, I.

[Farmer Wilson]

You're the famous Waldo McGlynn, aren't you? Nick Carter's great assistant?

[Waldo McGlynn]

You got the right man, ma'. Am. But it's a secret. Nobody's supposed to know that me and Nick is up here.

[Farmer Wilson]

Mr. McGlynn, I'm sorry. Certainly glad to see you. It's about those eggs. The bad eggs.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Oh, you found them then?

[Farmer Wilson]

Yes, they're. They're here on this farm. I need your help, Mr. McGlynn. I'm only a weak woman.

[Janet Steele]

And you.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Waldo McGlynn's the right man for you, ma'.

[Claire]

Am.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Where are them bad eggs?

[Farmer Wilson]

There's a building back of this farm, up this road a little. I'll show you.

[Nero Wolfe]

Good.

[Farmer Wilson]

Does Mr. Carter know you're here?

[Waldo McGlynn]

No, ma'.

[Narrator]

Am.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Waldo McGlynn works alone.

[Farmer Wilson]

Good.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Now, what's the layout here, ma'?

[Farmer Wilson]

Am. You see that house there, right along the chicken yard?

[Nick Carter]

Yep.

[Farmer Wilson]

There's some men live there. They rented it from Wilson. They pretend to be scientists doing research.

[Waldo McGlynn]

But they're. I know, I know. They're crooks, ma'.

[Nick Carter]

Am.

[Waldo McGlynn]

They're making dynamite and burglar tools for more crooks.

[Farmer Wilson]

Well, in some way, the nitroglycerin they're making. Got into the chickens drinking water. And tainted the eggs.

[Waldo McGlynn]

I've already deduced that myself, ma'.

[Patsy Bowen]

Am.

[Farmer Wilson]

So this morning, when the eggs were delivered to Bleecker's grocery Store in New York. Bleecker called Farmer Wilson on the telephone and complained. And Wilson asked the crooks about it. Because he thought they were scientists. He couldn't understand it. And the crooks realized that the tainted eggs. Might lead the police up here to their factory. So when they learned that all the eggs in this particular shipment went to Bleeckers. They rushed down to the city and tried to cover up by closing Bleecker's mouth. And paying off all the customers who came back to the grocery to complain.

[Nick Carter]

Yeah, sure.

[Farmer Wilson]

They even had a woman pose as a health inspector. To make it look legitimate.

[Waldo McGlynn]

But, ma'. Am.

[Janet Steele]

You come into the house, Mr. McGlynn.

[Farmer Wilson]

The crooks aren't here now.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Hey, but, ma', am, you were the health inspector.

[Janet Steele]

Yes, Mr. McGlynn, I was.

[Eddie Tyler]

Hi, Janet. Who's the character with the walrus?

[Archie Goodwin]

Spinach?

[Janet Steele]

Nosy little man. Works for Nick Carter.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Hey, you get.

[Janet Steele]

Stand still, McGlynn. And don't reach for that rod or I'll blow you wide open.

[Waldo McGlynn]

You're in cahoots with him.

[Janet Steele]

Shut up, Bindle. Yeah, Carter's in town. We have to drop everything and take care of him.

[Waldo McGlynn]

You'll never harm Nick Carter. You'll never.

[Janet Steele]

Grandpa Findle, tell the boys to get ready. You can tie up this character in the meantime.

[Nick Carter]

Okay.

[Janet Steele]

Oh, I forgot to tell you. I had to kill Eddie Tyler in town. He turned out to be a nuisance.

[Nick Carter]

What time is it, Patsy?

[Patsy Bowen]

6:30.

[Nick Carter]

Nick, where in blazes is Waldo? Should have been here at six.

[Patsy Bowen]

Maybe he located the farm.

[Nick Carter]

Yeah, he's probably there now. Blasting away with that old.44 of his guns. Of bigger menace to Waldo than the underworld.

[Farmer Wilson]

Sheriff Stickney? Sheriff Stickney, is that you?

[Nick Carter]

Well, it's that health inspector from New York.

[Farmer Wilson]

Sheriff Stickney. The most amazing thing just happened to me. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought Sheriff Stickney was in this car.

[Nick Carter]

You want help? I'll be glad to give it to you. I'm Nick Carter.

[Farmer Wilson]

Not the Nick Carter. Well, I'm Janet Steele, a health inspector from New York. I was up here investigating a shipment of bad eggs.

[Nick Carter]

What did you say just happened to you, Miss Steele?

[Farmer Wilson]

Oh, it's the strangest thing. I found a car parked out on the road. It's one that Sheriff Stickney rents. And guess what was stuck in the windshield? Half of a hundred dollar bill.

[Nick Carter]

And what road? Where?

[Farmer Wilson]

Just outside Wilson's farm. It was near a large white building alongside the chicken yards.

[Patsy Bowen]

Chicken yards? Nick, that's it.

[Nick Carter]

Yes, Patsy. Come on, let's get out there fast.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

The heavy roadster surges forward as Nick and Patsy drive into what is apparently a cleverly baited trap. We'll see whether or not the jaws of the trap close on them in just a moment. And now for the conclusion of the Case of the Chemical Chickens. Today's Nick Garter Adventure, brought to you by old Dutch cleanser. At 7 o', clock, the night is pitch black. Alongside the white house behind farmer Wilson's chicken yard, five men and a woman wait tensely watching the turnpike road.

[Janet Steele]

He ought to be along any minute, Bindle. I took the shortcut. He couldn't be more than five minutes behind me.

[Archie Goodwin]

He'll be along.

[Janet Steele]

This is what we do, Bindle. When he comes Walson in looking for Grandpa, we knock him and the girl cold. We take the three of them over to the covered bridge and drive them in the car into the river. Big accident.

[Eddie Tyler]

Better do it.

[Janet Steele]

Hold it, Bindle. Listen.

[Eddie Tyler]

It's a car.

[Janet Steele]

It's Carter. I know that car. Get set, everybody. When I give the word, give them the lights and show them they're covered. Looks like Carter and the girl. All right, Bindle, now. Oh, you're covered, Carter. You and the holy.

[Sheriff Stickney]

What's the meaning of this ruckus? What are you doing with them guns? Guns is illegal in Brixton County.

[Eddie Tyler]

It's that dame, Sheriff.

[Sheriff Stickney]

Your name's Bindle, ain't it? And yours is steel. Well, you're both under arrest.

[Janet Steele]

We got you covered, Ma. I'm sorry. Your number's up. Don't get excited, boys. Ma's gonna have a fatal accident along with Carter and the girl.

[Nick Carter]

The only accident I'm going to have is to pull the trigger of this tommy gun.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Hey, that's Carter.

[Janet Steele]

Carter?

[Archie Goodwin]

Where?

[Announcer]

On the roof of your little factory.

[Nick Carter]

Covering all of you. The first man who turns the light toward me gets a head full of slugs. Your racket's finished, Janet. You want to know why, ask your lawyer. You'll be seeing a lot of him while you're trying to beat a murder act.

[Sheriff Stickney]

Carter, I gotta hand it to you. You're all right for a New York detective. Laying the whole case in my lap the way you did was mighty generous.

[Waldo McGlynn]

Nick boy, I gotta apologize. I failed me mission. Just when I had this whole mystery solved, I made one. One little slip.

[Patsy Bowen]

One little slip. You walked right into a trap with your eyes wide open. You and your.44.

[Sheriff Stickney]

Just one thing, Carter. How'd you know that story of Janice was phony when she tried to trap you and Ms. Bowen?

[Nick Carter]

Well, Sheriff Stickney, three things. Before I came out here, I checked up and couldn't find any record of an inspector on the Health Department staff named Janet Steele. That was the first thing. Then I didn't like the idea of a health inspector working up here in Brickton. It sounded phony. She wouldn't have any jurisdiction up here.

[Sheriff Stickney]

She sure wouldn't.

[Nick Carter]

But the slip that gelled everything for me was when she claimed to recognize Waldo's car as one of the cars that you rented for a stranger in Brickton. It was obviously impossible for her to know that. So I pretended to fall into the trap. And that's all.

[Waldo McGlynn]

You done it in great style, Nick boy. When you showed up on that roof with a Tommy gun in your hands, you as old Sim Carter all over again. None of that fancy deduction stuff. No, sir. Bullets and action, Nick. Take Waldo Mlin's word for it. You'll be a detective yet.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

Well, Nick, what about the adventure old Dutch Klenter will bring us next week?

[Nick Carter]

Before I answer that, Bob, I. I wish to remind our listeners that National Boys Club Week begins tomorrow. And as you know, sponsoring a Boys Club of my own. I'm particularly interested in this fine work which is combating juvenile delinquency so effectively. More than a quarter of a million boys find wholesome activity and entertainment in these clubs. Under competent leadership, they receive companionship and recreation and learn to develop skills and ambitions according to law enforcement authorities. Boys Clubs lessen delinquency wherever they're established. For these reasons, I personally, as well as the makers of Old Dutch Cleanser, wish to salute the Boys Clubs of America for their great contribution in building the citizens of tomorrow. And now, next week's adventure.

[Patsy Bowen]

Oh, it scares me just to remember that case.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

If it scares you, it must be some story. What's it all about?

[Nick Carter]

Well, Bob, it started with a mysterious disappearance of a lot of new cars that were never found again.

[Patsy Bowen]

And just about finished when Nick and I ended up in an old abandoned quarry full of water.

[Nick Carter]

But thanks to a new short wave device. We managed to solve the case.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

I certainly want to hear this story. What do you call it, Nick?

[Nick Carter]

I call it the case of the Lucrative Rex.

[Old Dutch Cleanser Announcer]

Nick Carter, Master Detective is presented each week at this time and over these same stations by the Cudahy Packing Company, makers of old Dutch cleanser. Remember, when you go shopping tomorrow, get the cleanser preferred by more women in America than any other old Dutch cleanser. Nick Carter, Master Detective, produced and directed by Jock McGregor, is copyrighted by street and Smith Publications Incorporated. Lon Clark is starred as Nick with Charlotte Manson featured as Patsy. Waldo is played by Humphrey Davis, Matty by Ed Latimer. Today's script was written by Alfred Bester. Original music is played by George Wright. This program is fictional and and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. This is Bob Martin saying, when minutes count, use old Dutch cleanser. This is the Mutual Broadcasting System.

[Announcer]

Stay tuned for Nero Wolf, who follows transcribed in 30 seconds. Later tonight, over most of these NBC stations, Duffy's Tavern comes your way. And on the menu at Duffy's tonight, there's a blue plate special of grilled English language served up by the delightfully ungrammatical Archie, plus laughs garnished with chuckles brought to you by Archie's remarkable crew. There's no cover charge at Duffy's Tavern. Just keep your dial tuned to NBC, and this Sunday means another broadcast of the big show. Your guests include Fred Allen, Douglas Fairbanks, Danny Thomas and many, many more. Tallulah, of course, is your hostess. On the big show, ladies and gentlemen, that phone bell means adventure.

[Archie Goodwin]

Hello? Hello?

[Announcer]

The young man answering the phone is Archie Goodwin. The mountain of a man engaged in deep thought in the oversized armchair is Nero Wolf.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mr. Wolf, we've got a case. I'm not sure whether somebody's going to

[Announcer]

kill a rabbit or a rabbit is

[Archie Goodwin]

going to kill somebody, but either way, it's going to be murder. Please, Mr. Wolf, even orchids have to eat. Yes, sir. Mr. Wolf will take the case. As a matter of fact, he's working on it right now.

[Nero Wolfe]

Money work. Bah.

[Archie Goodwin]

Greatest detective in the world. Only trouble is, he is.

[Announcer]

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Archie is right. Nero Wolf is the greatest detective in the world and the fattest and the least energetic. Nero Wolf, created by Rex Stout and brought to you over this NBC network in a new series of Adventures by Mr. Sydney Greenstreet. Tonight, it's the case Nero Wolf likes to remember as the case of the friendly rabbit.

[Archie Goodwin]

He sometimes prefers his proverb, scramble.

[Announcer]

It began in lots of places. Let's Take a look at a few of them. In particular, the richly appointed library of

[Archie Goodwin]

a man named Veeck. Mr. Veeck, what's happening?

[Narrator]

Relax, Haynes.

[Archie Goodwin]

Your blood pressure.

[Nero Wolfe]

I thought it was a gag.

[Archie Goodwin]

But you really are shutting the club down.

[Narrator]

I'm shutting it down?

[Janet Steele]

Why?

[Archie Goodwin]

I got the joint roll and the suckers are pouring in.

[Narrator]

And next week the Governor's committee, it's moving on to Baylor County. Our joint enterprises in Baylor County. I think the club needs a rest. Crime committee so really admire gambling.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, that's different.

[Narrator]

So it is. The club needs a rest, you need a vacation. Florida, perhaps.

[Archie Goodwin]

I don't like Florida.

[Narrator]

Pick any place you like. Just so long as you get out of reach of a subpoena.

[Archie Goodwin]

The heat's on, huh, boss?

[Narrator]

You've just coined a phrase that may very well catch on. Get out and stay out of the state until I send for you.

[Archie Goodwin]

Okay, Mr. V. Sure, Mr. V. Marshall.

[Claire]

Yeah?

[Narrator]

That about covers us in Baylor. Am I right?

[Nero Wolfe]

You're right.

[Narrator]

The deer Governor's Deer committee will be sorely disappointed. However, I doubt it'll give up quite so soon.

[Nero Wolfe]

I wouldn't think so.

[Narrator]

Therefore, have the truck driver deliver another shipment of carrots to the rabbit farm, eh, Marshall?

[Nero Wolfe]

Okay, boss. Come in, Williams. Good afternoon, Governor. Good afternoon, Williams. I'm disturbed.

[Governor]

The Crime committee, sir.

[Archie Goodwin]

It was doing well.

[Narrator]

Very well.

[Nero Wolfe]

And then.

[Narrator]

I know, sir.

[Archie Goodwin]

There's a leak.

[Nero Wolfe]

Someone is passing on confidential information.

[Nick Carter]

Who?

[Archie Goodwin]

That's the problem.

[Nick Carter]

Who?

[Governor]

Started three weeks ago.

[Nero Wolfe]

A three man committee. Wilson, McCarthy, Tolliver one of them. Williams?

[Governor]

I'd stake my life, sir. No.

[Nero Wolfe]

Then who?

[Governor]

You've forgotten Collier, Committee secretary.

[Nero Wolfe]

You have reason to suspect him?

[Governor]

No, nothing that means anything.

[Nero Wolfe]

Except you do suspect him.

[Governor]

He's been watched. Telephone calls, checked mail. I have no reason to suspect him. Except that one thing bothers me.

[Archie Goodwin]

What's that?

[Governor]

He has a small farm in Greendale County. He rarely went near the place in all the time he's been up here at the Capitol. But that suddenly changed three weeks ago. Yes, sir. He's been staying at the farm for three weeks.

[Nero Wolfe]

Is there anything unusual about that farm?

[Governor]

Nothing unusual, except Jimmy Collier has gone in for raising rabbits.

[Claire]

Jimmy who?

[Nero Wolfe]

Oh, hello, Claire.

[Claire]

You've been hiding from me.

[Archie Goodwin]

I. I've been out here with the rabbits.

[Claire]

Jimmy. What's wrong?

[Archie Goodwin]

With what?

[Claire]

You.

[Nero Wolfe]

There's nothing.

[Claire]

You're lying. We grew up together, remember? We lived next to each other. Jimmy. We were going to be married.

[Nero Wolfe]

Hey, wait a minute. We still are, last I heard.

[Claire]

You haven't heard recently enough.

[Nero Wolfe]

What does that mean?

[Claire]

It means we're not getting married. But Clara, you've been avoiding me and you've been getting money, lots of money, from someplace. And in a shady way.

[Governor]

I feel all right, you know. So what?

[Claire]

I've been concerned about your sudden devotion to these. These rabbits and the kind of men you've been seeing.

[Nero Wolfe]

What do you mean?

[Claire]

Like the one up at the house now waiting for you.

[Governor]

Oh, there's somebody waiting.

[Claire]

That's why I came down here after you.

[Nero Wolfe]

I'd better get up there.

[Claire]

He's a crook, Jimmy.

[Archie Goodwin]

Look, I.

[Nero Wolfe]

All right, I sort of got myself in a mess. I needed money and. But it's over, Claire. No more.

[Claire]

Are you sure?

[Nero Wolfe]

Of course I'm sure.

[Claire]

I wish I could believe you for your own sake, but I feel I can't. Not anymore.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes, Mr. Wolf?

[Nero Wolfe]

I have to stop breathing so heavily

[Archie Goodwin]

or take the evening off.

[Nero Wolfe]

Stop breathing?

[Archie Goodwin]

Old Dr. Titmouse wouldn't approve of that.

[Nero Wolfe]

Who in blue and assorted Blazes is old Dr. Titmouse?

[Archie Goodwin]

My family doctor may have escaped your

[Nero Wolfe]

puny mind, but you don't have a family. Answer the phone.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, but it might be a case. It might be very important. It might mean work. Mr. Wolf. Auntie, w o r k, you've got millions in the bank, why worry?

[Nero Wolfe]

Confound you. Do you want me to answer their phone myself?

[Archie Goodwin]

Now you've got me. No, Mr. Wolf. Couldn't let you knock yourself out. Lifting a telephone receiver. Nero Wolf's office. Archie Goodwin. Speak.

[Nick Carter]

What?

[Archie Goodwin]

Wait. Mr. Wolf is to go up to Greendale at. Oh, now look, friend, Mr. Wolf does not go anywhere and that includes Greendale. He wouldn't stir out of the house

[Announcer]

for anybody short of the.

[Archie Goodwin]

What? I see. Yes, sir, in an hour. Goodbye, Mr. Wolf. Brace yourself. You've got an appointment with a Mr. Williams at the Starlight Hotel in Greendale for one hour from now.

[Nero Wolfe]

You're insane.

[Archie Goodwin]

No, I'll admit I've been tempted.

[Nero Wolfe]

Were it not for the fact that often the native hue of resolution is sickly door with a pale cast of

[Archie Goodwin]

thought quoting Hamlet will get you no place.

[Nero Wolfe]

I would fire you.

[Archie Goodwin]

And then who would drive you to the Starlight Hotel in Greendale?

[Nero Wolfe]

I'm not going to Greendale.

[Archie Goodwin]

Nevertheless, in an hour you will be there.

[Nero Wolfe]

And who may I inquire, Cecil?

[Archie Goodwin]

The governor of the state.

[Nero Wolfe]

Is that all, Mr. Williams?

[Governor]

That, Mr. Wolfe, is all anyone knows about the situation. Except the guilty man, of course.

[Nero Wolfe]

An admirably clear summary, Mr. Williams.

[Governor]

Obviously our meeting here at the hotel was necessary. I couldn't Be seen entering your house. Nor would it have been advisable for you to visit the governor.

[Nero Wolfe]

I can appreciate that. You're quite sure I need pay no attention to anyone on the committee except James Collier?

[Governor]

Quite sure.

[Nero Wolfe]

Police surveillance of Collier is deemed unwise. He has certainly taken interest in rabbits. But although keeping them may perhaps be considered suspicious, it is hardly in itself of value. You have no other evidence against Collier?

[Governor]

I know we're clutching at straws, Mr. Wolf, but there is a leak and work is being nullified. Something must be done. Hence the governor's call for you.

[Nero Wolfe]

Very well, sir. I shall attempt to be more than a man clutching at a straw. I should attempt. Archie, unpack. We shall stay at Greendale near Collier and his rabbits.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mr. Wolf. Mr. Wolf. Oh, naturally. I know that shutting your eyes and pushing your lips in and out indicates you're thinking feverishly, but there's nothing for you to think about. I accept your correction. What are you thinking about?

[Nero Wolfe]

Hotel babes. They're notoriously flimsy.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, you gave up on the case so soon?

[Nero Wolfe]

Fiddlesticks. I already know exactly what role the rabbits play in our problem.

[Archie Goodwin]

Therefore, we're going to drive out to Collier's farm. You are? While you test the hotel beds. Fine.

[Nero Wolfe]

It will be necessary for you to spend the night at Collie's place. You'll drive out there and pretend you've lost a cylinder or something.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, a lost cylinder. Oh, fine.

[Nero Wolfe]

Confound you, Archie. You can invent something plausible as a pretext. And if you are properly charming, Mr. Collier will, I hope, invite you to stay the night.

[Archie Goodwin]

And during the night I sleep happily, breathing the fresh country air.

[Nero Wolfe]

Trust not.

[Archie Goodwin]

Okay, Mr. Wolf, I accept the assignment. I will learn all I can from Mr. Collier's rabbits. Incidentally, remember the play Harvey?

[Nero Wolfe]

I do. Why?

[Archie Goodwin]

Harvey was an invisible rabbit, a figment of a man's imagination. I hope this rabbit venture is more tangible, Mr. Wolf.

[Nero Wolfe]

It is, Mr. Goodwin. Will you desist and depart?

[Archie Goodwin]

Okay, okay. Oh, if anyone calls, just say I've gone out to Greendale to cross examine a rabbit.

[Nero Wolfe]

I think you're going to be quite surprised.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes. Running out of gas. Me, Such a big boy. Hello.

[Claire]

Hello.

[Archie Goodwin]

That tree a friend of yours?

[Claire]

The tree?

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah, the one you're clutching.

[Claire]

Oh, I. I was leaning against it.

[Archie Goodwin]

It's an idea, but not a good one. Trees are notoriously skittish. The instant you really need one, they're out sewing wild oaks or something.

[Claire]

You sound as if you know a lot about trees.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, I do. I was brought up in one look. Now, if you really have to lean, I can recognize.

[Claire]

No, thanks.

[Archie Goodwin]

I tried. Nice moonlight we're having. My name is Goodwin and blondes call me Archie.

[Claire]

I'm not blonde.

[Archie Goodwin]

Brunettes call me Archie, too.

[Claire]

And what do redheads call you?

[Archie Goodwin]

We'll just skip that. Huh? And your name is?

[Claire]

Claire.

[Archie Goodwin]

Claire. I approve. Now, you may not believe this, but I have just run out of gas. You think I might wangle some up at your house?

[Claire]

My house? You mean Jimmy's house?

[Archie Goodwin]

All right, I mean Jimmy's house.

[Claire]

Well, I. I don't know. He might have something.

[Announcer]

Now, why don't we go up to

[Archie Goodwin]

the house and ask him?

[Claire]

Well, all right.

[Archie Goodwin]

Jimmy who?

[Claire]

Collier.

[Archie Goodwin]

Uh huh. I like to be formal when I'm borrowing gas. Would you mind waving your left hand in front of my nose?

[Claire]

Waving, Mike?

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes, just try it. Don't worry, I won't bite it.

[Claire]

All right, I did.

[Archie Goodwin]

And very gracefully, too. No ring in the third finger. You're not Mrs. Collier.

[Claire]

There isn't any Mrs. Collier.

[Archie Goodwin]

Are you applying for the position, Mr. Goodwinite? Now, remember what I confided in you about brunettes.

[Claire]

All right, Archie, You're a little rapid,

[Archie Goodwin]

maybe, but I always remember what old Dr. Titmouse said.

[Claire]

What did he say?

[Archie Goodwin]

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, Old time is still a flying.

[Claire]

Robert Herrick wrote that.

[Eddie Tyler]

He did?

[Archie Goodwin]

Dr. Tidmoss is a liar. How much farther is this house?

[Claire]

Well, it's just beyond those trees. I.

[Archie Goodwin]

What?

[Claire]

Oh, there was something ran across the path. It brushed my legs, frightened me.

[Archie Goodwin]

Must have been a rabbit.

[Claire]

I. I guess it was. I'm sorry. They were silly.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, don't worry about it. Also, you will have noticed how much more satisfactory I am than a tree. We're clutching at it. Moments of stress, I mean.

[Claire]

Archie.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mm. But you better let go now.

[Claire]

What? I.

[Archie Goodwin]

And we'll get onto the house.

[Announcer]

See, I don't need a haircut.

[Archie Goodwin]

And you're not the right type for Delilah anyway.

[Claire]

You mean something by that? Something nasty?

[Archie Goodwin]

Well, that depends. What I meant is you've already signaled whoever you're supposed to signal. Nothing frightened you back there.

[Claire]

Why?

[Archie Goodwin]

That scream had a lot of carrying power. Oh, that's the house, huh? Looks peaceful enough. Archie, who were you supposed to warn if anyone came up the path to the house?

[Claire]

No one. Something did frighten me.

[Archie Goodwin]

Honey, I've been lied to by experts, and you're not one. Oh. Think I ought to knock? No, we don't think I ought to knock. Dark inside, except for a handful of moonlight filtering in through the windows. Kind of early for Kalia to turn in, isn't it?

[Claire]

I wouldn't know.

[Archie Goodwin]

Let's go find out. Now relax, relax. Grandpa's making with the chimes. Time is. Yeah, 10 o'.

[Claire]

Clock.

[Archie Goodwin]

It's getting late.

[Nero Wolfe]

Come on.

[Archie Goodwin]

This would be the living room. Filled with early American furniture. The early Americans would be pleased. Nothing here. What's that door lead to?

[Claire]

I. I don't know.

[Archie Goodwin]

Or won't tell. Smaller room. Dark as.

[Nero Wolfe]

Come in. Put the beer on it. Oh, you're not the bell boy.

[Narrator]

I'm sorry. I should have remembered to bring some beer.

[Nero Wolfe]

Indeed. And you are?

[Narrator]

I'm a fellow guest at this hotel, Mr. Wolf. My name is Veek Veeck.

[Nero Wolfe]

Ah, yes. A criminal of moderate intelligence and immoderate pretentions.

[Narrator]

We won't quarrel, Mr. Wolf. I've something to offer you. You and your boy Goodwin didn't drive up to Greendale for the exercise?

[Nero Wolfe]

I dislike exercise. Shortens life.

[Narrator]

James Collier lives nearby. The Governor's Committee on Crime is unhappy. There's been a leakage of information. It hasn't helped them in their work,

[Nero Wolfe]

but it has helped you.

[Narrator]

You wouldn't have left your house in New York on any ordinary job. A request from the Governor, however. Shall we stop fencing?

[Nero Wolfe]

I don't have to fence with you.

[Narrator]

The committee's work doesn't particularly bother me. I've already made my arrangements for retiring from active business, shall I say. However, I don't want you messing around in the meantime.

[Nero Wolfe]

Indeed.

[Narrator]

In your effort to discover how the committee's information leaked out, you might also discover a number of things about me that I prefer to remain undiscovered.

[Nero Wolfe]

No one has employed me to do anything about you, sir.

[Narrator]

Not directly, but indirectly you might have to. I want to insure myself against any such possibility. I want to make a deal with you. I'm ready to supply you with the name of the man responsible for the leak and papers proving his guilt. I have them here.

[Nero Wolfe]

In return. For which you expect a quick conclusion

[Narrator]

to your activities and your return to New York, leaving my name out of your reports.

[Nero Wolfe]

I am neither a public official nor a philanthropist. I should do nothing about you unless it becomes necessary. You may remove your hand from your pocket. You wouldn't dare shoot me. Now then, the name of the man.

[Narrator]

James Collier.

[Nero Wolfe]

Proof of his guilt.

[Archie Goodwin]

These.

[Narrator]

A series of reports on the committee's meetings in Collier's handwriting.

[Nero Wolfe]

Thank you. Good night, sir. Good night.

[Narrator]

And I hope for your sake that we do not meet again.

[Nero Wolfe]

Archie answered it. Oh, hello.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mr. Wolf?

[Nero Wolfe]

Yes, Artie.

[Archie Goodwin]

I'm at the Collier place.

[Nero Wolfe]

Since it takes only 10 minutes to get there, may I congratulate you on your speed?

[Archie Goodwin]

I've been at the Collier place for nearly an hour.

[Nero Wolfe]

Doing what?

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, meeting Claire for one thing. Discussing rosebuds.

[Nero Wolfe]

Your delay has been explained. Good night.

[Archie Goodwin]

And for another, I was being around when someone got murdered.

[Nero Wolfe]

Ah, you laid hands on the murderer.

[Archie Goodwin]

No. The room was dark. The time I got Claire untangled from me and started looking for somebody with a gun. He'd left.

[Nero Wolfe]

I see. And the dead man, of course, is James Collier.

[Archie Goodwin]

No. Sorry.

[Nero Wolfe]

Found it. It had to be. Who was he?

[Archie Goodwin]

Total stranger. I'm not being difficult. There was no identification on him.

[Nero Wolfe]

Strange.

[Governor]

And description?

[Archie Goodwin]

Early 30s, height maybe 5 10. Weight around 175 pounds. Blonde hair, blue eyes, very natty dresser. Suit custom tailored with a built in shoulder holster. Don Juan shirts. Manicured, but very dirty fingernails. And the, uh.

[Nero Wolfe]

Oh, company you please. Very well. You tell them whatever you think proper without mentioning the governor's committee, of course. You then bid them farewell and come to the hotel.

[Archie Goodwin]

Can't I say goodbye to Claire too?

[Nero Wolfe]

You cannot confound your Archie. Do you think I want to wait up all night?

[Archie Goodwin]

Police were not happy about letting me go, but I threatened to tell you on them, so they gave up.

[Nero Wolfe]

You have told me the entire story of what occurred at the Collier farm. Archery?

[Janet Steele]

Mm.

[Archie Goodwin]

All details, if you like. I wouldn't mind repeating the parts about Claire. You may call it phooey. I call it love. By the way, did you know that it was Robert Herrick who wrote that? Okay, push your lips around, but you've missed something. I have the burning question of the day. Night, rather.

[Nero Wolfe]

Which is?

[Archie Goodwin]

Where is James Collier? Stop buying. The cops want him on suspicion of murder. The way it shapes up, he shot our unknown pal and then headed for the nearest border.

[Nero Wolfe]

Nonsense.

[Archie Goodwin]

Mean he didn't shoot our unknown pal.

[Nero Wolfe]

I mean, Collier's whereabouts are not a mystery.

[Archie Goodwin]

You know where he is?

[Nero Wolfe]

I know where he is.

[Archie Goodwin]

I don't believe it. You couldn't know. You haven't been out of the hotel. You haven't had any cold.

[Nero Wolfe]

Nah. Gee, I used my intelligence. If you had used yours instead of

[Archie Goodwin]

holding the girl, I still wouldn't know where Collier is. Never mind. I'm impressed. Impressed? What do I do now?

[Nero Wolfe]

You get Mr. Veek on the phone, huh? He's staying here at the hotel.

[Archie Goodwin]

Old home week. Operator, Mr. Veeck, please. Hello? Hello, Mr. Veeck? Who is this? Mr. Wolf wants to speak with you. Just A second here, you awesome.

[Nero Wolfe]

And you, Mr. V, where were you at 10:00'? Clock?

[Archie Goodwin]

Why, on my way to the hotel.

[Nero Wolfe]

You checked in at 10:15, then came

[Narrator]

directly to your room.

[Nero Wolfe]

One other question. You have an employee, a man in his early 30s, blond haired, blue eyed and well dressed. Am I correct?

[Narrator]

Yes, that is Marshall.

[Nero Wolfe]

Oh, that was Marshall. Good night, sir.

[Archie Goodwin]

Having done that, whatever it meant, we now go to sleep.

[Nero Wolfe]

So, hey, we go to the Collier farm.

[Archie Goodwin]

Okay. But why?

[Nero Wolfe]

Because, Archie, the time has come to cross examine the rabbits. Confound you, Archie, you're not driving a truck. Be careful.

[Archie Goodwin]

Truck drivers are careful also. They are courteous.

[Nero Wolfe]

Indeed.

[Archie Goodwin]

Furthermore, they will always stop to help a motorist in time of trouble.

[Nero Wolfe]

Archie, are you training to become a truck driver? Or have you fallen in love with a truck driver's daughter?

[Archie Goodwin]

Her name is Susie. Her hair the color of wheat fields at high. No, never mind turning purple. I'm about to change the subject. Boss, I have a theory. Stick to truck drivers as follows. Our boy Collier, who'd been selling information to Veek, had a change of heart and decided to turn ethical. But Veeck's man Marshall, at Veeck's orders, tried to apply pressure. So Collier shot him and and headed for Canada.

[Announcer]

And the girls rose to brighten my life.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh, you mean about her playing sentry. Well, she's in Veek's employ too. Phoe don't like my theory.

[Nero Wolfe]

It's charming. Merely happens to be wrong.

[Archie Goodwin]

Merely happens to be. Why is it wrong?

[Nero Wolfe]

Because, Archie, of a dead man's dirty fingernails. Marshall's fingernails.

[Archie Goodwin]

Well, you made me bring you to the rabbit hutches. We have arrived. There are the rabbits. Go ahead, cross examine them.

[Nero Wolfe]

Good. Many hutches. A large pen for the rabbits to run about in. Notice that they're old cowering at the far end of the pen. Ran as we entered.

[Archie Goodwin]

That's because they don't like us maybe, huh?

[Nero Wolfe]

One of them, however, seems to be friendly. The one up here at the corner opposite us.

[Archie Goodwin]

Oh yeah, there is one here. He's not friendly, Mr. Wolf.

[Nero Wolfe]

Indeed.

[Archie Goodwin]

He's dead. Somebody stole in his skull.

[Nero Wolfe]

Interesting.

[Archie Goodwin]

What's interesting about a dead rabbit?

[Nero Wolfe]

He may be dead now, Archie, but he was friendly too friendly.

[Archie Goodwin]

Claire, this is Mr. Wolf. Mr. Wolf, this is Claire. Claire, I'm Archie.

[Nero Wolfe]

Bye. Chair. Archie, a chair.

[Archie Goodwin]

Try this one. Be gentle with it. If you break it, all the early Americans will hate you.

[Nero Wolfe]

It'll serve.

[Archie Goodwin]

Steady.

[Claire]

Well now then, Mr. Wolf, I'm dreadfully tired. The police are idiots.

[Nero Wolfe]

What, for example, do they know that you were posted as sentry outside this house in order to warn James Collier of any intrusion.

[Claire]

Well, they don't. I wasn't.

[Nero Wolfe]

Do they know that James Collier and the dead man Marshall were quarreling?

[Claire]

No.

[Nero Wolfe]

Do they know that James Collier had armed himself in preparation for this meeting with the gunman?

[Claire]

That isn't true.

[Nero Wolfe]

It is true.

[Claire]

I don't have to say anything.

[Nero Wolfe]

You've already said more than enough with your actions, my dear.

[Claire]

What do you mean?

[Nero Wolfe]

According to Archie's report, an Archie is always meticulously accurate. When you and he opened the door of the room in which the murder took place, you screamed at the shots.

[Claire]

Well, of course, any girl would scream with.

[Nero Wolfe]

Then you clung to Archie with sufficient force and for sufficient length of time to prevent him from chasing the murderer.

[Janet Steele]

Why I?

[Nero Wolfe]

Because you had seen and recognized the murderer as the man you loved.

[Claire]

It was too dark to see anything.

[Archie Goodwin]

True.

[Nero Wolfe]

Therefore you didn't have to see the man. You thought you already knew who the killer had to be.

[Claire]

That's a lie.

[Nero Wolfe]

You're shielding James Collier, aren't you?

[Claire]

I'll never admit any of it. Never.

[Nero Wolfe]

May not be necessary. Haji.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yes, Mr. Wolf?

[Nero Wolfe]

Get hold of that policeman outside. And remember what happened to one particular rabbit. Well, look around for freshly dug earth. Midnight.

[Claire]

What? What are we waiting for?

[Nero Wolfe]

A return.

[Claire]

Archie's?

[Nero Wolfe]

No, it'll take him longer.

[Claire]

Well, then who's.

[Nero Wolfe]

Mr. Veek's, of course. Complete with revolver. Come in, Mr. Veek.

[Narrator]

It couldn't have been easier. No one outside, Only the two of you here.

[Archie Goodwin]

I warned you, Wolf.

[Nero Wolfe]

Fiddlesticks. You merely tried to use me as a prop for an alibi and a rationalization for a motive.

[Claire]

I don't understand.

[Narrator]

Mr. Wolf does.

[Nero Wolfe]

Indeed I do. Did you really think me fool enough to believe your proposal, Mr. Wieck?

[Narrator]

It was plausible.

[Nero Wolfe]

It was nonsense. You pretended you were handing James Collier plus the proofs of his guilt over to me in an effort to keep yourself out of the picture. But your proposition was silly. No matter how much I might have wanted to help you, I would have been powerless once James Collier went before a jury. You are too intelligent not to know that.

[Narrator]

That couldn't have given you enough to go on.

[Nero Wolfe]

It didn't. You yourself gave me more.

[Archie Goodwin]

I did.

[Nero Wolfe]

When you came to my room, you told me you knew Mr. Goodwin and I had come to Greendale, checked in at the hotel.

[Archie Goodwin]

I did.

[Nero Wolfe]

However, when I phoned you later and asked for an account of your movements between 10 and 10.30, you replied that you had driven to the hotel, signed in and came directly to my room. Obviously you already knew of my presence in the hotel. How?

[Archie Goodwin]

I.

[Nero Wolfe]

Only one way you could have known. You had seen Archie at some time prior to the time you checked in at the hotel. And the only place where Archie was

[Claire]

was here at the farm.

[Nero Wolfe]

Yes. Which told me Mr. Wieck had been here at the time of Marshall's death. What was Wieck doing here? Only one thing. Murder.

[Claire]

Then he killed the gunman.

[Nero Wolfe]

No other possibility.

[Claire]

But Jimmy, I thought he did it.

[Nero Wolfe]

James Cully couldn't have killed Marshall because at the time he was killed, James Collier was already dead.

[Claire]

Archie.

[Archie Goodwin]

What's this? Let's play.

[Nero Wolfe]

I'll drop that gun first.

[Archie Goodwin]

My arm. That's nice and cooperative.

[Nero Wolfe]

So

[Archie Goodwin]

he'll be quiet for a while. A cop is back in the rabbit pen, Mr. Wolf, guarding Collier's grave.

[Claire]

Grave, Archie?

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Archie Goodwin]

With James Collier in it.

[Claire]

Oh, poor Jimmy.

[Archie Goodwin]

Veek knew the expose was coming. He had to shut Collier up. So he had his gunman, Marshal, kill Collier and bury him in the rabbit run back of the hutches. You spotted that boss because of a dead rabbit.

[Nero Wolfe]

The others scurried away from the man who bore James Collier's body to that lonely spot. But one rabbit overcame his fear.

[Archie Goodwin]

He was too friendly and got killed for it. There was that. And.

[Nero Wolfe]

And the dirty fingernails of Marshall, the gunman who killed and buried James Collier. Your description indicated extreme neatness. The dirty fingernails were a wrong note.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah. Indicated he'd been digging. So we know now, don't we? Vic killed his own trigger man to frame a dead man for it. Collier would be thought guilty. He'd be hunted among the living. And all the while. I'm sorry, Claire.

[Claire]

It's all right, Archie. I didn't love Jimmy. That was all washed up. Mr. Wolf, I understand everything. Except why did Jimmy suddenly start staying at the farm with the rabbits?

[Nero Wolfe]

He knew he'd be watched. He couldn't risk conveying his information by telephone or the mails. Nor could he be seen holding conversation with men who might be traced to Veek. But who would suspect a truck driver delivering carrots for the rabbits as being the go between for Jimmy Collier and Veek?

[Archie Goodwin]

Nero Wolf. Which is why I hope there's an adequate bed in this house for Mr. Wolf.

[Claire]

I'm sure I'll be able to find one.

[Nero Wolfe]

Splendid. Archie. You will have the police removed, Mr. Veeck. And then? And then maybe Claire would like to

[Archie Goodwin]

go gathering rosebuds, huh? By moonlight.

[Claire]

I would like to.

[Nero Wolfe]

As you go up to bed now. Seen the moonlight More times than I care to remember. However, while you and Miss Claire stroll through the moonlight. Archie.

[Archie Goodwin]

Yeah?

[Nero Wolfe]

You might remember that rosebuds have thorns.

[Announcer]

You have been listening to the new Adventures of Nero Wolf, starring Sydney Greenstreet. Tonight's transcribed story was based on the characters created by Rex Stout. This is an Edwin Fadiman program produced and directed by J. Donald Wilson. In the cast were Larry Dobkin as Archie Goodwin and Martha Shaw, Hal Gerard, herb Butterfield, Howard McNear and Bill Johnstone. Next week at this same time, Nero Wolf and Archie will bring you the case of the impolite corpse. Don Stanley speaking. Free chimes mean good times on NBC. There's no cover charge at Duffy's Tavern. Just keep your dial on this NBC station this evening as Archie, the manager, played by Ed Gardner and his remarkable friends serve up another blue plate special of grilled English language, fresh laughs and whimsy. Alam mode. Another Friday fun favorite is the delightful life of Riley, starring William Bendix as the beleaguered Chester A. Riley. Now it's Sam Spade. Then the Magnificent Montague on NBC.

[Vincent Price]

Now here is our establishment, ladies and gentlemen. In a prejudice filled America, no one would be secure in his job, his business, his church or his home. Yet racial and religious antagonisms are exploited daily by quacks and adventurers whose followers make up the irresponsible lunatic fringe of American life. Refuse to listen to or spread rumors against any race or religion. Help to stamp out prejudice in our country. Let's judge our neighbors by the character of their lives alone and not on the basis of their religion or origin.