Duck Commander’s Kickball Domination Made the League Cry

Summary

Duck Call Room Podcast Summary Episode: "Duck Commander’s Kickball Domination Made the League Cry" Release Date: March 25, 2025

In this lively episode of the Duck Call Room, hosts Si Robertson, Justin Martin, Willie Robertson, Jase Robertson, Phil Robertson, and others dive into a myriad of entertaining topics. From personal anecdotes and family escapades to humorous takes on sports and household dynamics, this episode encapsulates the quintessential Duck Commander charm. Below is a detailed summary capturing all key points, discussions, insights, and laughs from the episode.

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1. "Ladies Night Out" Success

The episode kicks off with Si Robertson addressing their recent special episode, "Ladies Night Out." Phil Robertson confidently predicts the episode's success, stating, “[01:17] Phil Robertson: Oh, I. Listen, I will bet you that the ratings went off the roof.” Si Robertson humorously admits to not having watched it initially but confirms the high ratings with, “[01:27] Si Robertson: I have checked that and they did really well.”

2. Willie's Freezer Fiasco

A significant portion of the conversation revolves around Willie Robertson's frustrating experience with his freezer. Willie shares how his freezer malfunctioned, causing his wife to dump all its contents into trash bags and leave them on the kitchen floor overnight:

• “[01:27] Willie Robertson: My wife just sent me a picture of our freezer out and then instead of like just waiting and closing it so I can, she just put it all in trash bags and just left it on the floor for me to deal with.”

The hosts sympathetically discuss the challenges of handling such a mess, with Si suggesting practical solutions to mitigate odors and manage the bulk.

3. March Madness and Bracket Banter

The conversation seamlessly transitions to March Madness, with the hosts humorously navigating the complexities of filling out basketball brackets:

• Phil Robertson boasts about his bracket knowledge despite limited involvement: “[05:53] Phil Robertson: Well, I was fixing North Carolina. Both teams. Yeah. You got to watch them.”
• Jase Robertson reveals his favorites, including the Gators, and the competitive spirit intensifies as they discuss the potential winners.

This segment is peppered with light-hearted jabs about each other's sports acumen, making it relatable for listeners who partake in bracket pools.

4. Hunter’s Musical Misadventures

An amusing exchange unfolds around Hunter Robertson's accidental sharing of his extensive Spotify playlist:

• Willie recounts receiving a 48-hour music playlist from Hunter, leading to playful criticism: “[09:43] Willie Robertson: Yeah, it was like it wanted to be a band, but it was angry about something.”
• The hosts tease Hunter about his musical tastes, with Si noting, “[10:24] Si Robertson: Yeah. Well, no, I'm just saying, like, feel good music.”

This segment highlights the playful camaraderie among the hosts and their ability to find humor in everyday mishaps.

5. Kickball Domination and Gimber's Antics

The heart of the episode delves into Willie Robertson's tales from their kickball league dominance:

• Willie shares stories of back-to-back championships and the intense rivalries that ensued, particularly involving their friend Gimber: “[16:06] Willie Robertson: ...we were the back kick, back to back Washtaw Parish kickball champs.”
• A memorable incident occurs when Gimber becomes overly competitive, leading to a humorous confrontation: “[17:17] Phil Robertson: Whooping, boys.”

The narrative underscores the blend of competitive spirit and good-natured fun that defines their kickball experiences.

6. Chaperoning Fourth Grade Survival Night

Willie Robertson recounts his chaotic experience chaperoning a fourth-grade survival night at school:

• He details the challenges of managing energetic children camping in school hallways, dealing with restroom breaks, and maintaining order: “[21:38] Willie Robertson: This was the worst. I have had a rough weekend. That's why I'm kind of frazzled today.”
• The episode humorously explores the unexpected hurdles of supervising young kids in unconventional settings.

7. Pet Peeves and Household Clutter

A spirited discussion unfolds around the hosts' pet peeves, particularly focusing on household clutter and trash management:

• Willie expresses frustration over how his wife disposes of trash: “[35:00] She just put it all in and I'm like, well, now what the heck are we supposed to do with it?”
• The hosts exchange humorous anecdotes about maintaining household order, with playful ribbing about each other's messiness: “[38:30] Phil Robertson: It's called hoarding.”

This segment resonates with listeners who grapple with similar domestic dynamics, delivered with the hosts' signature humor.

8. Encounters with Wildlife: Dogs and Snakes

The conversation takes a wild turn as the hosts discuss their interactions with animals:

• Willie shares a story about being bitten by a snake while attempting to catch one for Carter: “[55:18] Willie Robertson: I was trying to catch a little ribbon snake for him and he had a particularly sour attitude.”
• The hosts humorously debate the merits of handling wildlife, emphasizing safety and the unpredictability of animals.

This lighthearted yet cautionary tale adds an adventurous flair to the episode.

9. Phil's Hilarious Auction Anecdotes

Phil Robertson entertains the group with amusing stories about his experiences at auctions:

• He describes a chaotic moment when his clothes were auctioned off without his knowledge: “[39:37] Phil Robertson: And look, I didn't know nothing about you. I look up there and the auctioneer Mark pulls out my cowboy boots.”
• The hosts laugh over the mix-ups and misunderstandings, highlighting the quirks of Phil's character.

10. Closing Remarks and Good-Natured Ribbing

As the episode draws to a close, the hosts engage in good-natured teasing and reflections on their shared experiences:

• Willie jokes about his various mishaps and the ongoing challenges at home, ensuring the episode ends on a humorous note: “[56:48] Si Robertson: Snakes on a plane. We'll see y'all next time right here in the duck call.”

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Phil Robertson on Episode Ratings: “[01:17] I will bet you that the ratings went off the roof.”
• Willie Robertson on Freezer Issue: “[01:27] My wife just sent me a picture of our freezer out and then instead of like just waiting and closing it so I can, she just put it all in trash bags and just left it on the floor for me to deal with.”
• Phil Robertson on March Madness: “[05:53] I was fixing North Carolina. Both teams. Yeah. You got to watch them.”
• Willie Robertson on Hunter’s Playlist: “[09:43] Yeah, it was like it wanted to be a band, but it was angry about something.”
• Willie Robertson on Kickball Domination: “[16:06] ...we were the back kick, back to back Washtaw Parish kickball champs.”
• Phil Robertson on Household Clutter: “[38:30] It's called hoarding.”
• Willie Robertson on Snake Encounter: “[55:18] I was trying to catch a little ribbon snake for him and he had a particularly sour attitude.”

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Conclusion

This episode of the Duck Call Room masterfully blends humor with relatable life stories, showcasing the hosts' dynamic chemistry and ability to entertain through diverse topics. From battling household chores and meddling in sports brackets to wild encounters with wildlife and hijinks on the kickball field, listeners are treated to a rich tapestry of laughter and camaraderie. Whether you're a long-time fan or new to the Duck Commander family, this episode promises plenty of chuckles and memorable moments.

Transcript

[Willie Robertson]

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[Jase Robertson]

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[Willie Robertson]

Find the right mobility solutions so they.

[Jase Robertson]

Can find new opportunities.

[Willie Robertson]

Because if your business is on the.

[Jase Robertson]

Road, they want to make sure it's.

[Willie Robertson]

On the road to success.

[Jase Robertson]

Enterprise Mobility moving you moves the world. Find your [e-mail] Foreign.

[Si Robertson]

Ladies and gentlemen, we hope you enjoyed the special ladies night out here in the duck call room. But we have taken our seats back over and I'll be honest, I haven't watched it.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, I. Listen, I will bet you that the ratings went off the roof.

[Si Robertson]

I have checked that and they did really well.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, I knew that.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

My wife just sent me a picture of our freezer out and then instead of like just waiting and closing it so I can, she just put it all in trash bags and just left it on the floor for me to deal with.

[Si Robertson]

Already I'm angry. Yeah, that's a problem.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Because I'm not. I got things to do.

[Si Robertson]

At least that won't smell by the time you get home.

[Jase Robertson]

No.

[Willie Robertson]

What are you doing? And oh, but by the way, it's too heavy for her to pick up now because she filled the bags. Too much match.

[Si Robertson]

Huh?

[Jase Robertson]

That can be part of your workout plan.

[Si Robertson]

Huh? Oh, the. The odor.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm upset. I'm legitimately upset right now.

[Si Robertson]

Is that why you threw yourself?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, I. I just. Because it's like. Just leave it if don't make it more difficult. I'm sorry. Did the favorite coffee drink.

[Si Robertson]

No. Time out. I gotta know. So is it like your inside freezer? You got a deep freeze?

[Willie Robertson]

Like what the indoor freezer in the.

[Si Robertson]

Kitchen that's on the refrigerator? Yeah, like it's attack. Like refrigerator freezer. Your freezer just done.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't. I don't know. But all the food's gone and there's in trash bags on the floor. That's what I Know.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

That's a tough.

[Jase Robertson]

When did it stop working?

[Willie Robertson]

It's a great question.

[Phil Robertson]

Nobody know.

[Willie Robertson]

Nobody knows.

[Si Robertson]

Was it left open? There's a lot. There's a lot.

[Willie Robertson]

There's a lot to try and learn right now that I'm just being. It's all being dumped on me and the floor but it's too heavy for anybody else to pick up.

[Phil Robertson]

She didn't. May have went in for a late night snack.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, it is spring break.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, he already had.

[Willie Robertson]

Right.

[Si Robertson]

Oh yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

I was sent this photo. Unfortunately I also left my laptop. I'm frazzled today, everyone.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, you. You were.

[Phil Robertson]

You had a rough.

[Jase Robertson]

A rough morning. Didn't you see a wreck?

[Phil Robertson]

I got that must have been a.

[Willie Robertson]

Very little freezer now size bashing the size of my.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, hey, I'm just saying. Hey, I had a big freezer. Okay. With mine. We don't. We need to.

[Si Robertson]

That's why. That's why I asked.

[Phil Robertson]

We need the dump trucks to take.

[Si Robertson]

All like if the one on your refrigerator goes out. Yeah, it sucks. Don't get me wrong. But not near as big as if you're like us that are outdoorsmen that have outdoors got all that deer steak.

[Willie Robertson]

There is some deer steak somewhere in that all the. And I would like to know if it was actually frozen or she just. She'll just throw something away. Homegirl will throw some stuff away.

[Si Robertson]

Oh yeah, this is.

[Phil Robertson]

You like those.

[Si Robertson]

You. You sound like you watched the one that they did and you come in here with ax to grab.

[Willie Robertson]

I didn't. I watched the first segment and I was like that was really good. But no. What time is it?

[Jase Robertson]

So if the food still good, I mean we can come eat it.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, I got that picture 10 minutes ago.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I mean it may be good food.

[Willie Robertson]

It's all in trash bags that are.

[Si Robertson]

Too heavy to lift and. But the trash bags are in your house. Yes, yes. You should have done that outside.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't want it outside though because then by the time I get home a dog will have it strown across the whole.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, but then it's no longer your problem.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, it is the neighborhood.

[Si Robertson]

20 mile an hour wind. The HOA hang around. 20 mile an hour wind out of the north. The person to your south is the one that's going to be upset.

[Phil Robertson]

Your neighbor. Your neighbor on the south.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, that's fine. You'll never notice.

[Jase Robertson]

Haul it to the pond and push it in.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, I think them doodle things he got will probably gnaw them all to pieces anyway. So that's fine.

[Willie Robertson]

I watch one of them dogs take the biggest dump yesterday. It brought me a lot of joy. I was just sitting out there looking at the pond. I was like, this is a nice neighborhood to look out. And just. Jeff's dogs just crapping.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

My view.

[Si Robertson]

And you watch the whole thing. What is it about dog taking a dump? I watch it. Every time I see it, I'm like. Or if you're driving down the road and you see two dogs locked up, you're like, golly. And you just sitting there, you know, they just doing what dogs do.

[Willie Robertson]

You know, just doing what they do.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, man.

[Willie Robertson]

But, yeah, I didn't watch the ladies. I watched part of it. I was like, this is good. But then I heard they started crying, and I was like, I can't.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, happens every time. You get three or more women, that's it. Hey, three or more women, there's going to be cry. That's what Phil always said. He said it ain't over to. Somebody gets to cry, so you have a little time.

[Phil Robertson]

Unless they cry.

[Jase Robertson]

It's just part of it.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, man. Well, we coming out of the first weekend of March Madness. Do you make a bracket? You didn't.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, but I did watch a couple games.

[Si Robertson]

Did you? Oh, you got winning at all. You're a. You're a. You're a big prognosticator who's going to win the whole thing out of what you watch.

[Phil Robertson]

Here's the deal. I hadn't looked at. I hadn't looked at them. Duke's always in the running. North Carolina, the Wolf Pack. That was in the running.

[Si Robertson]

No, that's NC State.

[Phil Robertson]

Huh?

[Si Robertson]

That's NC State. North Carolina's Atar Heels, well, they got beat.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, I was fixing North Carolina. Both teams. Yeah. You got to watch them.

[Jase Robertson]

I got the Gators going all the way.

[Si Robertson]

Really went out on a limb there, didn't you?

[Jase Robertson]

No.

[Phil Robertson]

What? The top four right now is what? Gators, Auburn, Houston, Auburn.

[Si Robertson]

And Duke.

[Phil Robertson]

And Duke.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Jase Robertson]

So I'm in the bracket with all my family, and a lot of their brackets have already been busted.

[Si Robertson]

And y'all got all different people. That's cool.

[Willie Robertson]

My bracket is not busted.

[John David Robertson]

What's a bracket?

[Jase Robertson]

March Madness. March Madness. Hunter.

[John David Robertson]

I have no idea.

[Si Robertson]

Hunter.

[Jase Robertson]

Basketball.

[Si Robertson]

You live like. I mean, when you do, you. You do leave this office, right?

[John David Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

So you don't understand that the NCAA men's basketball tournament is going on and women's as well.

[Phil Robertson]

Women.

[Si Robertson]

Well, no offense to the ladies, but the bench. The men get a lot More coverage. No, not trying to make anybody mad here, but.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, I.

[Si Robertson]

You've never in your life, like just out of the 64 teams, just picked a bracket made and see who wins.

[John David Robertson]

What's a bracket mean?

[Willie Robertson]

Are you joking?

[Si Robertson]

I feel like, first off, I feel like you're baiting us here.

[Jase Robertson]

No, I don't think he is, cuz he's looking like.

[Willie Robertson]

I mean, I understand you don't know basketball, but he said there's a tournament and then he said the word bracket. Like you played enough Mario tournaments to at least know what a bracket is.

[John David Robertson]

Got it now?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Where you start here and you win, you keep going. I've never like a bracket.

[John David Robertson]

I've never been good enough at anything to be in a bracket or watch sports with.

[Si Robertson]

Which is why you're the perfect guy to fill out a bracket, right? Because if you play like. Yeah, you got some biased opinions. You could go into it. When Johnny D worked here and he had plenty of time on his hands, we would always make a mascot bracket. He would come in my office and say, the Wildcats versus, you know, the Preachers or whatever and. But wait, Wildcats gonna win.

[John David Robertson]

You guys are making the brackets yourselves.

[Si Robertson]

No, there's a. There's this, there's this. There's a sports company called espn. I don't know if you've heard of them.

[Jase Robertson]

You just fill the bracket out and.

[Si Robertson]

They have the bracket done for you and you just go through there and click.

[Willie Robertson]

Telling me there's never been like an anime bracket competition on the Internet that you particip. No, this man's never seen a bracket.

[Si Robertson]

Like, you've never, in all your online gameplay, you haven't joined like a bracketed.

[Willie Robertson]

Tournament, like, or just like made a bracket and voted on something to win.

[Si Robertson]

We've done it in here for like greatest gambler. You don't have to gamble to fill out a bracket. I was confused.

[John David Robertson]

It sounded like you guys were making your own brackets and I was just lost.

[Willie Robertson]

We're not the committee. Oh, Hunter's. Hunter's frazzled.

[Phil Robertson]

We need a committee, Hunter.

[Jase Robertson]

I'll show you after the podcast.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm frazzled. Hunter's frazzled. Hunter sent me. Hunter tried to send me one song yesterday because he says I. He. I don't believe in bands because they don't exist anymore. Like, when was the last time you saw a band?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Willie Robertson]

They don't exist anymore. New band. Name one. Not any. And Hunter's like, pretty wild.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, that's right.

[Willie Robertson]

There's no such.

[Phil Robertson]

My day. The 60s.

[Willie Robertson]

All bands.

[Phil Robertson]

All bands. Now, now, now. What's a new band?

[Jase Robertson]

Well, now, we heard a zydeco band recently, but it was not like they've.

[Willie Robertson]

Been around 30 years.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, right. Correct.

[Willie Robertson]

Hunter says, proven you wrong. Here's a band. But he accidentally sent me his entire playlist from Spotify. I got 48 hours of Hunter music going on right now.

[Si Robertson]

So, Hunter.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, what. What was that like?

[Willie Robertson]

It was like it wanted to be a band, but it was angry about something.

[John David Robertson]

That's not true.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, it was like kind of screaming.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, it was a rapper.

[John David Robertson]

No rapper.

[Phil Robertson]

That's not doing well.

[John David Robertson]

I sent you. Accidentally sent you my alternative playlist.

[Si Robertson]

No screaming alternative.

[John David Robertson]

It's all feel good music.

[Willie Robertson]

I didn't feel good. Then explain to me why I felt the way I felt after I listened to it.

[Phil Robertson]

Feel good music.

[Jase Robertson]

Okay, Hunter, build a bracket and send it to us.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, I'm gonna make a bracket of that music, and nobody's winning. Yeah. So then he's like, I'm embarrassed. I was like, it's what you listen to. It's fine. I'm gonna give it a chance. I knew a couple songs.

[Si Robertson]

I had a joke there, but I ain't gonna make it.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, I'm proud of you, man.

[Si Robertson]

There was. There was some good stuff there.

[Willie Robertson]

Was there?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Catch them.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Well, no, I'm just saying, like, feel. Feel good music. Like, do you have to let the antidepressants kick in first? Or is this. What is this okay if you're unmedicated? Like, I don't know, like, does the Adderall need to drop in? Or, like, where are we at it feel good music.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no, because, hey, that's what they always said. The. One of the greatest bands in the 60s they was talking about.

[Willie Robertson]

Okay.

[Phil Robertson]

Was it the music or was it the drugs we was taking?

[Si Robertson]

Yes, it was the drugs.

[Phil Robertson]

No, it wasn't the drugs. They all said, hey, nope, we was on drugs. But the music was sound, buddy. That's what it was.

[Jase Robertson]

Of course it was because of the drugs.

[Si Robertson]

By a very definition, music is sound. So. So.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, I know, but I'm just saying. Hey, the music was Right.

[Willie Robertson]

He's just saying 60s had some good.

[Jase Robertson]

Some good.

[Si Robertson]

I just used the word tight correctly. I like that.

[Willie Robertson]

That's tight.

[Phil Robertson]

Look at this, man.

[Si Robertson]

It's 20, 25. Look at God, man.

[Willie Robertson]

We're still saying tight.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure.

[Willie Robertson]

Tight.

[Phil Robertson]

A good saying.

[Jase Robertson]

N. Let's bring it back.

[Phil Robertson]

S. How was it? Hey, they was tight.

[Si Robertson]

That's tight.

[Willie Robertson]

Hey.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, that's tight.

[Phil Robertson]

Tight.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, careful. Them people in the comments gonna get on you for trying to be cool. Even though that's the way you talk.

[Willie Robertson]

That's tight.

[Jase Robertson]

Trying to be cool.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Just saying. Hunter. Wow. No bracket, no bracket. Bracket. Bracketless, hunter. Bracketless hunter.

[Phil Robertson]

64 options. Okay.

[Jase Robertson]

And nope.

[Phil Robertson]

Who's going to come out the winner?

[Jase Robertson]

I don't. I do not know.

[Willie Robertson]

That's how a bracket works.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Pick one out of 64.

[Phil Robertson]

That's right.

[Jase Robertson]

I saw him dressed up. He had his to copas on.

[Si Robertson]

Did he looked a little taller.

[Jase Robertson]

He's six three again.

[Si Robertson]

Well, you know, anywhere worth going is worth going in good, good boots. And I guess that's why side decided to wear his to covis.

[Jase Robertson]

He was looking good.

[Phil Robertson]

They are a good boot.

[Si Robertson]

And you know what they say that you can't have a good time in bad boots. But the opposite is true too. You can't have a bad time in good boots. You know what I mean? And that's why our friends over at Tacovas help you out. How does the Covis make you feel when you put them on? So I'm just curious.

[Phil Robertson]

Look at. They was tailor made, boys.

[Si Robertson]

Tailor made right for you didn't have to break them in, none of that stuff.

[Phil Robertson]

Now, hey, that's one thing about them boots are made so well.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

Okay. If you don't get the right size, you know, get your foot in.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, because they're.

[Phil Robertson]

They ain't going to give.

[Si Robertson]

And if you've ever wondered if you can pull off boots with your personal style, you owe it to your feet to pull on a pair of covers. Being confident isn't about being different. It's about being yourself. And you can find comfort in traditions of the west and confidence and making it your own. Honor the west by leaving your own boot print. Anyway, everyone at Tacovas boots are handcrafted with over 200 meticulous steps for broken in comfort right out of the box. And whether it's a long day at the ranch or a big night on the town, your to covis are built to last and impress. There's no compromise between quality and style with these boots. Plus with Tokova's best in the west guarantee, you get free returns and exchanges for 30 days. Which we had to do because I ordered the wrong size of boot.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, most of them have a break in period.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. And you have to do that.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, look, there ain't no breaking period because they ain't no break.

[Si Robertson]

Look. And if you want to wear size Boots, you can do it right now. Get 10% off at to covis.com/ when you sign up for email and text, that's 10% off at T, E, C O V A S.com/ to covis.com/C site for details. To Covis.

[Phil Robertson]

Some boot Boogie boys.

[Si Robertson]

Toes West.

[Phil Robertson]

That's what was fun back in the day. What is all the church teams like you're talking about? Did everybody in the town.

[Willie Robertson]

Nothing.

[Phil Robertson]

All out of dame.

[Willie Robertson]

And nothing starts a good fight. Church league, basketball or softball?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, our softball. Yeah, that can get rough.

[Phil Robertson]

That was a lot of fun back in them days though.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

I think every fight I've ever been.

[Si Robertson]

In was a church sport.

[Willie Robertson]

Was a church sport.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

And look, the guys that calm it down, they. They come, they come out to calm it down. They're not like on third base saying, hey, let's calm everything. It's somebody in the. Who's not playing in the dugout who has to come out.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, it reminds me of hockey, which I'm not a big hockey fan. Yeah, but the reason the fans go to watch a hockey game, it's a fist fight. Yeah, that's the way all. All the stuff was back in the Johnny D's.

[Jase Robertson]

Been to a lot of them.

[Willie Robertson]

You're more than welcome to tag along some.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no, no, I'm serious. That's why, you know, because our basketball team that we had in local community, we had One guy, he's six, six, weighs about, oh, 375, maybe 400. And look, not an ounce of fat on him.

[Jase Robertson]

Come on.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, I'm serious. And this man never wore anything but overalls. No shirt, no shirt, overall. And then you have one in big clown red anchors that most people could use them as a blanket.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, was that the guy in the water boy?

[Phil Robertson]

Huh? He wasn't water boy. He played. That was the one that I don't wanna. No, no, that was the one that bought a breeding bull for $20,000.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, that's him.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, here we go.

[Phil Robertson]

And then killed him.

[Si Robertson]

One single.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, look, I'm telling you, that boy's fist was as big as that bongo drug.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, Lord have mercy.

[Phil Robertson]

And the bull run over him, okay? He had that red Hank stuff hanging out his overall. The bull run over him, turned around and the guy got up. Dust himself off her when he come running back.

[Jase Robertson]

Come on. Sigh.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, he hit him right there and killed him dead as a hammer.

[Si Robertson]

Well, next time that we have gimba in here, you'll have to ask him about the dust up he almost got into over a kickball game.

[Willie Robertson]

I was just about to freak that up. Gimber got into it with this. Dude was being a tool. And I don't know if the people know there. There was a kickball league, it only lasted for three years. And there was this one team called Duck Commander, led by a certain young man sitting next to side twice a week, AKA me. And we were the back kick, back to back Washtaw Parish kickball champs. But it got heated every once in a while because people didn't know the rules. I still have those trophies and stuff. Anyway, Gimber absolutely about hurt somebody one night. And it was the funniest. And I don't know if y'all know this about me. I might be able to like, amp.

[Si Robertson]

I done told you emotions up and.

[Willie Robertson]

Then just start laughing about it because I don't need to fight. Really?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, he'll get you in a fight, but he ain't gonna be there.

[Jase Robertson]

That's like the blue cyclone. He's gonna back you up as far as you want.

[Willie Robertson]

I got the people angry, and then they started yelling at us. And I'm just laughing about it because I'm like, we're going to beat y'all. And it's kickball, so I don't really care. But then they made Gimba mad. So Gimme walked out on the field and Angela told him to stop.

[Si Robertson]

I told him to stop.

[Willie Robertson]

And then it just. And then the next words, it was. It was one of the funniest statements I've ever heard in my life. And when I tell you, it got real quiet except for me laughing. It was. Let's just say Angela yelled at Gimber that his kids were there and watching because Kimber was kind of. He wasn't acting right. She said, gamber, your kids are watching. He said, yeah, they're fixing to watch me kick somebody's butt. Yeah. And I hit the floor. I was on the ground just laughing.

[Phil Robertson]

Whooping, boys.

[Willie Robertson]

And then we. And then we beat that team. And then we were the back to back to back.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, we beat everybody.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, we had a secret weapon. Yeah, he was fast.

[Si Robertson]

He was fast. I thought you talking about Shelby.

[Willie Robertson]

No, she was not fast. That's the slowest human being I've ever seen.

[Si Robertson]

Human roadblock. Yeah. She like Greg Maddox running the bases.

[Willie Robertson]

That I'm faster than Drew now, by the way, are you beat him in a race?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. So there you go. Anyway, Amber, let's remind. Let's, let's. We'll bring up I'm sure he's still proud of that. I bet he hadn't forgot it. So when he. When he slides back in the duck call room, we'll. We'll hit Gimber up on.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, Gimber.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah, he got a little hot head in him.

[Phil Robertson]

The ball champions.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Three times.

[Si Robertson]

We used to have a trophy some.

[Willie Robertson]

They literally just said, we're not doing this league anymore because you are going to win it again.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And I was like, disbanded the kickball.

[Si Robertson]

Well, we figured out the cheat code, right.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm the Bill Belichick.

[Si Robertson]

There's a cheat code. There's a cheat code to every league, Right. You bunt till you get the bases loaded and then you kick snot out of it because they can't get you out on a bunch. Nobody possesses the ability to peg you with a kickball if you can halfway run.

[Willie Robertson]

Except for that one girl. And I apologize to her.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, you decleeded her.

[Willie Robertson]

I feel bad about it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

She was playing first base and she was running, and so. And like, we didn't even try. They didn't throw the ball to me, but she's looking at me. And I acted like I was gonna catch it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Then I acted like I was gonna throw it at her and she just dove out the way.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Look like he or she.

[Jase Robertson]

And the ball's not anywhere.

[Willie Robertson]

Ball's nowhere close.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Just a cloud of dust.

[Willie Robertson]

She goes, ah, y'all. And then tumbles.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

And then rocks and dirt are everywhere. And I'm like, yeah, she's bleeding.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

And I'm like, oh, no. I genuinely felt terrible. And she gets. She's like rolling on the ground. She stops and looks at me, goes, why would you do that? And I was like, I feel awful.

[Jase Robertson]

But we're playing the win.

[Willie Robertson]

No, that was just a joke. Like, I had nothing. She was on first base. It was like I was just messing around, acting like I was gonna throw. And then I was like, it was a bluff.

[Si Robertson]

It was fun, though, because you had to, like, it was alternating coed, so you had to have is like, boy, girl, boy, girl, boy, girl. So our wives got involved, you know, some played. Oh, Brittany played. Long legged gazelle out there running around like a baby giraffe. Like. Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

It was like she just got that tall yesterday. You know how to use her legs?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, they just kind of went everywhere. Like, still does that. Like if a wasp or something gets. After all, you see his arms and legs coming, buddy. And then she's like. And then. So what's funny? Is Jackson's built like me, right? But he understands the concept early of running. Like, he uses his arms and he can smoke Whale, even though he's 10 pounds heavier. But Whalen run like Brittany got them arms out to the side, and then double joints is just going. So they just. He. If he ever figures it out, he'll smoke Jackson. But right now, like, Jackson takes him. Just take off from him. And Waylon just got. I gonna catch you. And he don't ever even get. I'm like, waylon, turn around. Look behind you. Like he's doing circles on you. Like, you're. Be a lot faster if you just turn around and go back towards him. Like, you can catch him that way.

[Willie Robertson]

But no, man, I was single dadding it.

[Si Robertson]

It was fine. Oh, I mean, our wives left us. I don't know if your kids are like this, but when mom leaves, they're way better behaved. Praise God. They turn into a delight.

[Willie Robertson]

They can't get. They can't get away with everything.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. The whininess leaves.

[Willie Robertson]

He don't care if I wine.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. They just look up at me and they're like, well, he's back. And, you know, like, we have a great time. That's. It's fun. But I had to.

[Willie Robertson]

I told you what I did. Side. You're never going to believe this. This was the worst. I have had a rough weekend. That's why I'm kind of frazzled today. Do you know what Carter's class did the fourth grade? They said, what if we, like, all do a survival night to teach the kids how to survive, and we'll bring all the tents and sleep in the hallway at the school. Fourth graders.

[Phil Robertson]

And my wife said they all show up with tents.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. And. And I. My wife made me chaperone. I did not sign up. I was signed up. And I thought there'd be, like, 50 dads there.

[Si Robertson]

Were you the only one?

[Phil Robertson]

Wrong answer.

[Si Robertson]

You weren't the only one.

[Jase Robertson]

No.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, there were two.

[Willie Robertson]

Two.

[Si Robertson]

Do you like the other one, at least?

[Willie Robertson]

I do like him. And to be fair, he. He actually is a junior high principal, so. Oh, he's the guy.

[Si Robertson]

Okay.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm just there.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, you're there.

[Willie Robertson]

At least we got this guy. And at 230 in the morning, when none of these little jokers had gone to bed, he's pacing the hall. He's just pacing with his hands behind his back, like, I'm halfway asleep. And then this kid gets up to go to the bathroom and then doesn't go. He didn't go. Then 10 minutes later he goes back to the bathroom. I said, no, not going back to the bathroom. He goes, I gotta go. I said, you can wet the bed for all I care. And then I realized, I said, I'm not supposed to be chaperoning children. Yeah, no, I threatened the kid that I wanted him to wet the bed, but it would have been his fault because he should have gone when I told him to go. It's what I would have told my kid.

[Jase Robertson]

I learned my lesson when I was getting my master's degree and never shaping.

[Willie Robertson]

On a fourth grade.

[Jase Robertson]

No, I was, I was working at Crosley elementary and I was the computer teacher, which means I took the floppy disk, put them in and turned the computers on for kindergarten through sixth grade. And look. And the kids would tell me, I.

[Willie Robertson]

Gotta go to the bathroom.

[Jase Robertson]

And I'd be like, yes, go, help yourself. So the other teachers started getting on to me. They were like, hey, you can't let these kids go. You got, they got the time where they go and that's it. You don't let them go. I was like, okay. So the next class came in, I gotta go. And I was like, John David, I said, no, you had an opportunity. And I mean just boom, right there, just Peter self. And I was like, okay, everybody to the bathroom right now. And hey, I let them go. After that, anytime they said they had to go, I let them go because I didn't want to clean up no more messes.

[Willie Robertson]

I didn't think about the fact that I might have had to clean that up.

[Si Robertson]

You would have. I wouldn't. You would have been cleaning up tt in the hallway of the elementary.

[Willie Robertson]

I just left. It wasn't my tent. Somebody gonna have just a pee soaked tent. They weren't there to watch their tent. Martin, I ever tell you about the time that the cop showed up to my front door because I was having stuff delivered to my house?

[Si Robertson]

Nope.

[Willie Robertson]

But turns out it was just some kid having stuff delivered.

[Si Robertson]

Really?

[Willie Robertson]

He stole a credit card from somebody else had delivered to my house so he wouldn't get caught.

[Si Robertson]

You know what if those other people would have had Identity guard, never would have to worry about that. There's some of us, you know, hardworking red blooded Americans that, you know, still value freedom, privacy and financial security. But then folks on the Internet don't. But you can help protect yourself with Identity Guard. With Identity Guard, they'll monitor your identity, credit and Social Security number in real time. So you get instant alerts before the damage is done. If you get notified of something suspicious, just call their 247 USA based customer care team. There's no frustrating phone trees or AI bots. Just a real person.

[Willie Robertson]

USA based.

[Si Robertson]

There you go. Who knows how to help you fix the problem. When you sign up for Identity Guard, you'll be getting identity credit and Social Security monitoring. But there's more. You also get up to $5 million in identity theft insurance, dark web monitoring, bank and investment account protection, and home and auto title fraud alerts. And one of the favorite parts. Look, automatic data broker opt out. That means they'll remove your personal information from people search websites that sell your data. And we don't want to scare you, but you need to know there's a victim of identity theft every six seconds.

[Willie Robertson]

What? That just happened?

[Si Robertson]

It just happened again.

[Willie Robertson]

Not quite. Now it did.

[Si Robertson]

Ain't that something? Look, don't let the next one be you. Sign up for Identity Guard today.

[Willie Robertson]

It just happened again.

[Si Robertson]

It is super easy. We've all done it here. And it took, I don't even think it took a minute to do everything on it.

[Willie Robertson]

And in that minute, 10 people's identity were stolen.

[Si Robertson]

But not me, because I got Identity Guard. Baby, look. Wow. Listen to this offer from Identity Guard. Identity Guard is offering our listeners a 30 day free trial and 60% off when you go to identityguard.com that's 30 free days and 60% off. @identityguard.com that is less than what you're paying for streaming service you forgot to cancel this month. That's I D E N T I T Y G U a r d.com to sign up for a 30 day free trial and get 60% off. Certain terms apply, so be sure to check the site for details.

[Willie Robertson]

The other dad said he went to bed at 4:30. I fell asleep at 3.

[Si Robertson]

That's not going to bed. Yeah, that's just falling asleep.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, but then he had to coach a soccer game the next day. That Lottie was in. I didn't even go.

[Si Robertson]

So if I do it in the fifth grade, are you in or you out?

[Willie Robertson]

Hey bro, they do it in the fourth grade.

[Si Robertson]

That's it?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

I didn't know I got a fourth.

[Willie Robertson]

Grader next year too. Oh, I'm gonna be back. But I'm more prepared this time. I. Oh, I wish I would.

[Si Robertson]

Are you gonna bring contraband?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, he's gonna bring a water bottle.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm gonna bring a turtle box. And at 6:00 in the morning when they won't get out of there.

[Phil Robertson]

What's that? Noise I hear JD's got. He's rattling. What? Some kind of change they're gonna have.

[Willie Robertson]

Just the circle of life playing full blast in their tent.

[Si Robertson]

Go home.

[Willie Robertson]

5:45 in the morning. Didn't want to go to bed. How's it feel now?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. How you like me now? Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Allison sent me a picture this morning. She finally got to Carter. Sleeping bag just had chips all in the bottom of it.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, of course.

[Jase Robertson]

What were they doing camping out?

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, they were having part of it.

[Si Robertson]

You were there.

[Phil Robertson]

That's a good point.

[Willie Robertson]

I wasn't pay to nothing. I had a door. My job was to make sure no kids got out that door. That one kid kept going the bathroom, driving me crazy. So he became my problem, too. That was my weekend. Still frazzled. Now my freezer's out, diet out. I got a lot to do today.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, mine was way better than that. We just. We sat at home and played in the pollen, and, boy, do we have it. Good Lord. At the pollen.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, it's bad, that pollen.

[Si Robertson]

We didn't get near enough rain to wash it away last night either.

[Willie Robertson]

Now you just got yellow paste everywhere.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, it is. It is definitely pollen season.

[Phil Robertson]

My black truck is yellow.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, it is.

[Si Robertson]

Well, my white truck's yellow, so.

[Jase Robertson]

My white truck's yellow.

[Willie Robertson]

I mean, my gray trucks.

[Jase Robertson]

Let me tell you about what I did this weekend.

[Si Robertson]

What'd you do for your.

[Jase Robertson]

I thought I'd go mow the grass before the rain came.

[Si Robertson]

Like every other redneck.

[Jase Robertson]

Like every other redneck. But I got out there and it started raining, and then I drove underneath the carport, and then it quit. Then I went back down at the bottom of my land. There's some. Some area out there that stays wet.

[Phil Robertson]

It's low.

[Jase Robertson]

It's low. So I said, I'm just gonna get as close as I can. I mean, you know. And I got my mower stuck.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, of course.

[Jase Robertson]

And then I went and got the four wheeler, got it stuck, and I had to go get my wife and say, thank you. Mike can help me. I had to get in my truck and back it all the way down as close as I could, hook all the chains up to it and pull each of them out. And I got her to pull and me to ride. We did get them out, but I was so filthy. Mud everywhere, all over me. Nasty.

[Si Robertson]

Getting stuck at your age make you irrationally angry?

[Jase Robertson]

Not like JD angry, but, yeah, I was angry.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm frazzled.

[Si Robertson]

Well, once you make it to this point in life, you realize just how Dumb. Getting stuck.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Like most of the time I should have stopped and said, no, it ain't worth it. Let me just. I'm gonna go put the mower up. No, I couldn't do it. One more pass. That's all I wanted.

[Si Robertson]

That's what I was gonna say. Most of the time it is 100% preventable.

[Jase Robertson]

Absolutely.

[Si Robertson]

And that's what makes me so angry.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, getting stuck.

[Si Robertson]

Yes.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, yeah. And then you just stay on it to the bogs all the way down.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Then. Then the pride comes out. So now I can get this thing out of here. And then when it sits on its axles in the frame, you're like, well, no, let's go get another vehicle.

[Willie Robertson]

Keeps going lower.

[Jase Robertson]

That's when I had to go get my wife.

[Phil Robertson]

This thing I've been invol. We went duck hunting up to Moss Lake. We got stuck in Phil's Toyota and.

[Jase Robertson]

He was the red Toyota.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, okay. It's just stupid mood. When we got stuck, he just sits there with his foot to the floor, the engine just screaming. Okay. He said, well, it's going to do one or two things. And I said, you got a winch on the front. That's why you got the winch. Okay. He said, nope, it's going to pull out or blow up. And we sat there for 15 minutes. And I said, well, that's pretty good engine because it ain't blowed up yet. I said, you going to go out and do the winch and pull it out. He finally changed his mind.

[Jase Robertson]

Stubborn.

[Phil Robertson]

But he sat there for 15 minutes.

[Si Robertson]

His foot on the floor, letting it eat.

[Phil Robertson]

Screaming, yeah, yo, and I. I laugh. I was laughing the whole time.

[Si Robertson]

Were there any beverages involved in that?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, we have beverage.

[Jase Robertson]

See, that makes a lot of sense. Now, what's known as manageable.

[Willie Robertson]

Thank you.

[Si Robertson]

So y'all ain't just playing dumb? Yeah, okay.

[Willie Robertson]

It's just the stupidest thing he's ever been involved in.

[Jase Robertson]

But you kept looking at the winch saying this.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, this is an easy fix. I was just there once a while.

[Jase Robertson]

Say, hey, look, that winch is still there.

[Phil Robertson]

We're about. You're with that the 10 minute mark. Oh, the weight's still out there.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, yeah, I'll run it.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. No, I ain't going to do it.

[Si Robertson]

Why not?

[Phil Robertson]

No, I. I'll let him get.

[Si Robertson]

You ain't a winch man. No, you was a gate man.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, yeah, I get the gate, I'll open gate for you.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Amen to that. You ever seen a winch snap?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no, no, no.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. Windows busted.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. I was just curious if.

[Willie Robertson]

Gone.

[Si Robertson]

Before I walk out of there, I'll go run that winch for him.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, well, no, no. If it's either walking or. Yeah, I'll do it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Let me get that winch.

[Phil Robertson]

I'll do it.

[Si Robertson]

Hold on.

[Willie Robertson]

The only thing I miss about that gator flame truck.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, no, no. Get in and. And hook a winch up and then stand in front of it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Don't have to.

[Phil Robertson]

I always say, hey, look, I advise you not to stand there. And the guy said, well, what are you talking about? I said, hey, that thing is in a bind, son. And I said, hey, that's just a little cable.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

I said, what is that thing breaks.

[Si Robertson]

Get something between you and it's coming to you.

[Phil Robertson]

And I said, that thing will cut you in half, though.

[Jase Robertson]

All you gotta do is see it. Once when I saw it snap and bust a window out. Oh, no, there's power right there.

[Si Robertson]

I thought you saw somebody get cut in half or something.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm like, well, I'll fix a. That's a dangerous thing. Yeah, it is under pressure. Big time pressure.

[Willie Robertson]

I like when Sai sees somebody endangering their life and he just says, I would advise you.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, no, no, because I don't.

[Willie Robertson]

The other day, after another place to stand.

[Phil Robertson]

I did the other day when we was filming out there. What, he done something dangerous?

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And then I just said, hey, stupid, don't go up there and play with that.

[Si Robertson]

Can confirm. That's exactly what he said.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, stupid, stupid, don't be going up there and playing with that.

[Si Robertson]

Can confirm.

[Willie Robertson]

Did you. Did you see what I did when you said that? No, I stood behind Allison.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, hey, I just said, hey, you're doing something real dumb right there.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, I can confirm. You know, he said, oh, the other day.

[Si Robertson]

So there's y'all something to look forward to.

[Willie Robertson]

Also, next year on Campout Survivor night, can you come tell the children had a couple speakers the whole time. I was like, you know how much funnier this would be, how much more I'd enjoy myself?

[Jase Robertson]

You would.

[Willie Robertson]

I mean, the both speakers did a great job, but I was like, imagine side talking to 60 fourth graders at 10:30 at night about Vietnam.

[Si Robertson]

Was this a coed?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah.

[Si Robertson]

About too. Oh, even better. Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Bingo.

[Phil Robertson]

That was one of the best days. Okay. As far as I'm concerned about feminine.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

The day me and Phil went to Washtar Prairie and. And talked to the kids.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

One of my favorite.

[Phil Robertson]

That was hilarious.

[Willie Robertson]

You want to run it back? I got a kid that'll the most.

[Si Robertson]

Fun and I'll save a wood duck.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. Oh, no.

[Willie Robertson]

He is under the impression you are his biological uncle.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Which is great. You are. You're the whole world.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

That was so funny. Oh, man.

[Willie Robertson]

Allison sending me the weather. She got just. Just a freezer piled up in the kitchen.

[Jase Robertson]

Now she's on to something she wants you to know.

[Willie Robertson]

I shouldn't have gotten home before it rains. About that, but no. Well, they. They asked about our pet peeves, and she probably talked about my socks or something. But her. Her pet. My pet peeve about my wife is the way she treats trash. Because it's my problem. She won't break down a box and she will fill a bag up and leave it there that she can't lift and I can't lift and Andre the Giant himself can't lift. And she's like, oh, just. I piled it in this bag. It's a trash bag. So I put all the trash in and I'm like, well, now what the heck are we supposed to do with it? Cuz there's so much trash in it. We're going to need a fork.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, we can't move it.

[Willie Robertson]

S. You're full of wisdom and knowledge and all the great things.

[Phil Robertson]

And a lot of other stuff, too.

[Willie Robertson]

And a lot of other stuff. You know, there's only two things in life that are certain.

[Phil Robertson]

What's that?

[Willie Robertson]

Death and taxes.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, well, I don't want neither one of them.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, good deal. Now there's a third. And I'll give you one you do want. If you're with Verizon at&t or T Mobile, you could be saving a fortune every month by switching to Pure Talk. That's right. Pure Talk, our sponsor and my cell phone company is cutting the fat from the wireless industry. For just 25 bucks a month, you can get unlimited talk, which you love. Text, which I love, and five gigs of data on America's most dependable 5G network.

[Phil Robertson]

That be pure talk, baby.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, listen to this extravaganza. The average family of four saves over $1,000 a year when they switch to Pure Talk. That's real money back in your pocket. With Pure Talk's US Customer service team, you can switch hassle free in as little as 10 minutes. You can even keep your phone and your phone number. If you're looking to upgrade your current device, they can help with that too. Switching's easy. I know because I did it And I'm a Pure Talk customer. And Si, you're going to love this. They do so much for veterans. They've donated 50 grand to provide scholarships to support veterans. And they've been helping to eliminate veteran debt, raising donations to end veteran suicides. They're veteran owned and we support veterans and they do too. So do this. Go to puretalk.comduck to make the switch and you'll save an additional 50% off your first month. Again, that's puretalk.comduck to start saving today. PureTalk Wireless by Americans for Americans.

[Phil Robertson]

Go USA, baby.

[Si Robertson]

So Allison gets something in from Amazon.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, that box is just sitting on top of the trash can.

[Si Robertson]

So. But okay, I'd rather that.

[Willie Robertson]

Saw the photo.

[Si Robertson]

I'd rather that than it be put in the bag because Brittany will drop a box in the bag and take up half of the garbage bag.

[Willie Robertson]

I would lose it.

[Jase Robertson]

We burn all boxes at our house.

[Si Robertson]

Well, I cut them down. I save them like. And we at Duck Commander Beth will be proud of this. We actually have a cardboard recycling bin outside.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't believe that.

[Si Robertson]

But it's there if should you ever decide to use it.

[Phil Robertson]

It's cardboard only, but most people don't use it.

[Willie Robertson]

Here's the deal.

[Si Robertson]

Most people don't, but I. A box in a trash bag drives me.

[Willie Robertson]

That's a woman thing.

[Si Robertson]

Drives.

[Jase Robertson]

It don't fit.

[Si Robertson]

Insane.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm about to get bashed here. Why are women just so bad at throwing stuff away? They've tried and find the most difficult.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, why Is. Because it's ingrained in them. My wife was in there in my closet the other day. She come back and she said, oh, I'm going to throw all your blue jeans away. Wait a minute, wait a minute. You gonna do what?

[Si Robertson]

No, that means they're coming to my office.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no. She said, I'm gonna throw. You don't ever wear them. All you wear is them three pants.

[Si Robertson]

Well, she's got a point.

[Phil Robertson]

And I said, hey, don't be throwing my blue jeans away.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, I may want to go. Stepping out.

[Phil Robertson]

I may. I may want to put them all. Good grief.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, she had a box full of your stuff years ago. Years ago. Years staying.

[Phil Robertson]

Had a box, filming. And look, I didn't know nothing about you. I look up there and the auctioneer Mark pulls out my cowboy boots. Tell them how much you gonna give me for that. Well, they start out the way.

[Jase Robertson]

The boots his mama sent him when he was in there.

[Phil Robertson]

That's my boots.

[Willie Robertson]

You had to buy them.

[Phil Robertson]

They sold Them you could have bought them. And I'm looking and say, wait a minute. And then next thing is, hey, they got one of my pretty coats. And I said, pretty coats?

[Jase Robertson]

His whole outfit?

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

And I said, his leisure suit.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. Oh, oh, whoa. I said, hey, that is not being sold.

[Willie Robertson]

What'd they say?

[Phil Robertson]

Yes, it is. Mark said, who's gonna be? I walked up and took it from. And I had. He started grabbing. I said, I fixed the punch you in the nose.

[Si Robertson]

Do you still have that coat?

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Or is that one of them things that ended up in my office?

[Phil Robertson]

It may be gone down.

[Willie Robertson]

It's a pretty.

[Phil Robertson]

I had check. I hadn't done an inventory. Oh, that they get in a cleaning spree. A woman does. Okay.

[Willie Robertson]

But didn't they make it more difficult to throw away?

[Si Robertson]

I did hear Britney and Bella both confessed that they griped about me being messy on here.

[John David Robertson]

Are you messy, John David?

[Si Robertson]

But admittedly, look, admittedly, I ain't messy.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm living exactly how I want to live.

[Si Robertson]

I don't like clutter bothers Brittany. Was that. And clutter does not bother me at all.

[Phil Robertson]

That's. That's me and Christine.

[Si Robertson]

Like, I. It really bought. Like she gets so annoyed when I get home every evening, I take my hat off.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Lay it on the counter.

[Willie Robertson]

You gonna put it on tomorrow.

[Si Robertson]

Throw my trinkets, my sunglasses, my wallet, keys all inside my hat. It does not go on the counter.

[Phil Robertson]

I said, where's it go?

[Si Robertson]

I don't know.

[Willie Robertson]

You're going to get it all again tomorrow.

[Si Robertson]

It don't go on the counter. But I say, oh, so what they call messy is really just clutter. But I leave stuff like organized situation. No, I'm not even going to go organized.

[Willie Robertson]

That's why you got a counter to.

[Si Robertson]

Put stuff situationally arrange. Like these things go together. They may not be there may be too big of a box or look. But I know that if I need fishing hooks.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Something I know they're right there with the rest of this stuff. I got not to be confused with my duck decoys that are over here or my yeti coolers that I have one of every size for. Because you never know what. What you may need. You know, like, I know it doesn't look great, but I know where everything is in each individual.

[Jase Robertson]

No. And then it all gets moved.

[Phil Robertson]

Me, I've got the ten Commandments at my house. Okay. And it ain't got nothing to do.

[Willie Robertson]

With the actual woods. Oh, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

It ain't got nothing to do with the Bible. What's the first one in my area where my recliner's at tables.

[Si Robertson]

Thou shalt not steal, right?

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, do not touch.

[Si Robertson]

Thou shalt not touch.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. Do not touch.

[Willie Robertson]

Commandment 1.

[Phil Robertson]

It's like that right now. Dude, don't sit in this chair. Emeralds are contagious.

[Willie Robertson]

Hold on.

[Phil Robertson]

Don't touch it.

[Willie Robertson]

Now shout.

[Phil Robertson]

Like, first thing I always say is, hey, where is this Christine? I can hear it in her room. I touched it.

[Si Robertson]

Always the first sign of a guilty party, right?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, they respond like that.

[Phil Robertson]

It's like when you throw a rock in a pen of dogs. The one that yelps first. Hey, you got. That's the one you hit. I said so since, hey, you happened to do something with it because you screamed just the minute I said it. She said, I didn't touch it. Yo, what's the second? Hey, I know where everything is at, and in this rate.

[Si Robertson]

And admittedly, I'm terrible, too, because if you let me know that clutter bothers.

[Phil Robertson]

You, I'll try to do something about it.

[Si Robertson]

No, I'm the exact opposite.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah.

[Si Robertson]

I'm going to try to get you to a point where clutter no longer bothers.

[Willie Robertson]

Women are like wild horses. You got to break them in.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, well.

[Willie Robertson]

And you just got to clutter up everything.

[Si Robertson]

And even. Even new office mates, A cowboy woman. My office drives a couple of the new people here crazy.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no.

[Si Robertson]

And you know what? They don't come in there. And I'm cool.

[Willie Robertson]

You're like, you should have been around when Johnny D was here.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. There were two of them, identical. Oh, I get on Brittany every day for jumping up there and joining my supplement cabinet. Now, because, like, I had everything spaced out. I got three shelves in there. I had. I had my mornings, my evenings, everything in their own little deal. Well, then she decided she won't get healthy, start taking all this stuff, too. And then she puts all my stuff.

[Phil Robertson]

On one shelf, and then you gotta go through it.

[Si Robertson]

And she takes the middle shift, the easiest one to see. Yeah, I'm like, yeah, it was a lot easier before you cared.

[Jase Robertson]

I've got all my stuff. I take it like you. I set all my stuff down in one place. But then if I'm watching tv, I want to have my stuff here. If I'm in the bedroom, I want to have some My stuff here. If my medication or anything that I'm taking or using is gone, it's either my daughter or my wife has moved it.

[Willie Robertson]

They got to move stuff. I don't know I know exactly where I put everything. It's wild.

[Jase Robertson]

And I say, honey, have you seen my super suit?

[Si Robertson]

What's wild is they don't mind clutter behind the door.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, but as long the closet in the closet. We got a closet in a closet. That is a nightmare. Allison's wedding dress is in there, and you can barely even see it because there's pillow anything. She's like, she don't want to throw her stuff away.

[Phil Robertson]

It's called hoarding.

[Willie Robertson]

And she got one closet with all of her dirty little secrets in there. Pillows.

[Phil Robertson]

Just junk. It's hoarding.

[Willie Robertson]

Okay, K. She's a. Allison throws so much stuff. You know what Allison wanted for Christmas? A roll off dumpster for a week. I said, no, I like my. I've worked hard for a lot of these things.

[Jase Robertson]

She's gonna throw some trash away.

[Willie Robertson]

She gonna throw my stuff away, come in my garage, say it's gross in here. I said, it was nice to. Your daughter moved her gymnastics stuff in here with me.

[Jase Robertson]

She's gonna bag it up and you're gonna throw it away.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, because she ain't gonna be able to pick it up once she get it in a box.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, it is funny. Golly, them women's wild, man. See, I just prefer clutter to be out there in the open that we can see. It ain't got to be in a cabinet.

[Willie Robertson]

I can step over stuff.

[Si Robertson]

You know, and it drives her nuts, too, because the boys, you know, they're two.

[Willie Robertson]

Ain't getting it.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, clutter don't even began to describe what them boys do to that.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, every day married between a man and a woman is better than Bailman Barney's Circus, Barnum and Bailey.

[Si Robertson]

Barney. Barney. That big purple fella is that guy.

[Willie Robertson]

From the Greatest Shaman.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Guy that preached Sunday. That's what he preached on.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And it was hilarious. It really was. Because he said. He said, well, you got two individuals and they come together and get married. And he says, and they both. It's so messed up, it ain't even funny.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. He says, you take your mess, then you take her mess.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Then you try to work it out and think it's going to work out. No.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, there you go.

[Willie Robertson]

I tell. I text Alison. I said, well, my frustrations of this freezer debacle is at least got on the. Made a pretty good podcast. And she said, you're welcome, girl.

[Jase Robertson]

Now let me text back, bring it over here.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm just gonna leave it at that. I'm not in trouble unless she watches this. But she knew. She literally said, you're gonna be upset. She knew what she did. She's like, I can't lift these bags.

[Si Robertson]

They know.

[Phil Robertson]

Can't lift the bag.

[Si Robertson]

Yes, they know every time they do it. That's fine. But you know what? So do we.

[Willie Robertson]

I want, I. I do want people to email in.

[Si Robertson]

I mean, so do we. We do stuff. Same.

[Willie Robertson]

I know when I take my socks off, I'm like, I need to put those up. And I don't, don't.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, you don't even get them to the hamper.

[Willie Robertson]

The socks. Yeah, you can find, you can find my socks in a lot of places in my house.

[Si Robertson]

Britney gets mad at me cuz all mine are hamper adjacent. She's like, it is right there. I'm like, I know. I got it close. Oh, by that way, when I go to do laundry, I can just grab.

[Willie Robertson]

I guarantee you, if you go to my house right now, you can find some socks in our couch. Guaranteed. It's not the best thing I've ever done. I'm not proud of it, but it is true.

[Si Robertson]

Anyways, hey, at least we're being honest here, right?

[Willie Robertson]

We love each other. Spring is here.

[Si Robertson]

It is sprung. Yeah, it is. It is sprung. And we spent all weekend outside, me and the boys, while our wives were at conference. So it was fun being back out in the yard. And I got some ideas, I got some new plans coming. And I think. And not I think I know. Our folks at Fast Growing Trees can help.

[Willie Robertson]

Of course they can. They got the biggest online nursery in the entire America.

[Si Robertson]

That's exactly right. Fast Growing Trees is the biggest online nursery in the US with thousands of different plants and over 2 million happy customers. And you're looking at some of them right here.

[Phil Robertson]

Look.

[Si Robertson]

Fast Growing Trees offers a wide variety of plants, including fruit trees, privacy trees, flowering trees, and shrubs, all tailored to your climate and space with an easy online ordering process and quick delivery straight to your door. Plus, with their alive and thrive guarantee and expert support, your plants will arrive healthy and you'll receive guidance on choosing the right plants and learn how to properly care for them. So you can do it just depends on what kind of fruit trees you want. They got, they got a bunch of stuff like you get on there, you look in their little finder, you. You find your zone and it'll give you a list of everything that will grow here. That's why my satsuma tree, still thriving. My lime tree, still thriving. My persimmons. Big yard, small yard, no yard. Fast growing trees has over 6,000 plants to fit any space from indoor plants to fruit trees to full size privacy trees and more. So if you a fence, make it out of a tree. You don't have to make it out of lumber. Just put up some cedar trees or something if you want to.

[Phil Robertson]

I have fence boy. Cool part.

[Si Robertson]

You don't have to waste your weekends driving around the nurseries looking at limited supplies. You have the whole world at your fingertips right there. They got you. Fast Growing Trees can help you this spring. They have the best deals for your yard, up to half off on select plants and other deals. And listeners to our show get 15% off their first purchase when using the code duck at checkout. That's an additional 15% off at fast growing trees dot com. Using the code at checkout fast growing trees dot com code duck. Now's the perfect time to plant. Use duck to save Today. Offers valid for a limited time. Terms and conditions may apply. We should have watched it. That way we could have at least tried to defend ourselves. But really and truly, we're just admitting to more of it now that we.

[Willie Robertson]

I know. I know exactly what Allison talked about. Socks. The fact that you don't think I'm funny. Probably. And I'm loud.

[Si Robertson]

But Allison doesn't think comedy's funny, so.

[Willie Robertson]

Just doesn't get it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, she doesn't get it. He doesn't think comedy's funny. I don't understand why y'all think that's funny. Like, oh, it is wild. Hunter, you got a voicemail. When you can do one or two. Before we get out of here for.

[Willie Robertson]

Today, we look over and Hunter's just yawning. Apparently, we're the most boring people on earth.

[John David Robertson]

That's so not true.

[Willie Robertson]

Hey, throw your. Throw your little weirdo. What's it called on?

[Jase Robertson]

I actually like a lot of bracketless.

[Willie Robertson]

The bracketless Hunter. I will say Hunter's playlist while he's getting. This is kind of a. There were a few bangers on there that I learned about.

[Jase Robertson]

You gonna play a little bit of it for us?

[Willie Robertson]

Well, that's illegal. They would.

[Jase Robertson]

Five seconds is good.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, five seconds.

[Si Robertson]

Seven, I think.

[Jase Robertson]

Is it seven?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Seven seconds, I think so.

[Si Robertson]

What you got, Hunter? Play the. Play the voice. Oh, there is.

[Willie Robertson]

See, this isn't that bad. Me and Hunter would probably got along in high school. We would have been at that weird table that nobody else knew what they were doing.

[Jase Robertson]

I need to get. You would have got him in a fight.

[John David Robertson]

I couldn't find a table. I Had to sit on the. The ground.

[Willie Robertson]

It's not true.

[Si Robertson]

You went to West Washtaw?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[John David Robertson]

Indoor seating area. Sit on the ground?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. You went hid.

[John David Robertson]

No, just no tables.

[Phil Robertson]

No table.

[John David Robertson]

No one would let me in.

[Phil Robertson]

You don't like tables?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, there was the.

[John David Robertson]

The wooden nerd table where they would play magic and I would just sit on the ground next to them.

[Willie Robertson]

To be fair, the ground next to them is a better place than Whitfield. I'm just kidding you, Magic.

[John David Robertson]

Anyway, I have a voicemail.

[Willie Robertson]

I'd actually like to play that game.

[Travis Matthews]

Hey, my name is Travis Matthews.

[Si Robertson]

I'm from Lake Charles.

[Willie Robertson]

Like he's from Florida.

[Phil Robertson]

Providence.

[Jase Robertson]

Like his name's.

[Willie Robertson]

It's the guy that sells all the golf clothes.

[Si Robertson]

Oh yeah. Bubba Watsons, people. Travis.

[Phil Robertson]

Matthew Bubba Watson.

[Willie Robertson]

You can tell by his voice that he's from the country.

[Travis Matthews]

My name is Travis Matthews. I'm from Lake City, Florida. I actually grew up with. Hey, Alligator Lake is right next to the high school in Lake City. And I'm gonna tell y'all this. Every summer whenever I was playing high school football, there would be at least 1 to 2, probably 10 to 5 foot average gators on the field. And you just gotta go out there with a shovel or. And just shoot them off. But I thought y'all would laugh at that story and I told Kate I would leave a voicemail, see if y'all would put it on the duck call show or whatever it is. But.

[Willie Robertson]

Or whatever it is.

[Travis Matthews]

I guess I'm done.

[Si Robertson]

All right, Travis. Travis, I need.

[Willie Robertson]

I need a video of someone chasing an alligator with a 10 foot alligator with a shovel.

[Si Robertson]

I don't even need that. I need more behind the scenes cage stories. If you could provide us with some potential blackmail and. Or really just overall laughs. But there you go for somebody from Cade. Our. Our newest. I guess he's technically newest employee. I don't know. I don't have hired.

[Willie Robertson]

Every time I show up here, there's.

[Si Robertson]

There's somebody different. But allegedly they were working for us on the side. You know, I don't even know anymore. But the now Travis that I. I can see that. Yeah. Alligators basking on the football field. Yeah. Totally believable.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't like alligators.

[Jase Robertson]

No, I don't either.

[Si Robertson]

Y'all. What y'all got against them lizards?

[Willie Robertson]

They had them at the zoo did show up. It's a survivor night. And like was like, hey, you want to hold a snake? All them kids were holding snakes. And there was about 10 of them, including Carter, who come and stood by me. And I was. They were like, you don't have to. And I was like, you dang straight I don't have to. I'm a grown man. You ain't making me do nothing. And. And I said, and now I know which kids are smart in this class and which ones are dumb.

[Si Robertson]

The ones that held the snake or the smart one.

[Willie Robertson]

No, the ones that held the snake were with me and Carter. Carter's like, I ain't holding that thing. I said, you know what sizes you can do? You can grab it by its tail and pop its head. Because the guy was like. And you. He.

[Jase Robertson]

He gave this head off.

[Willie Robertson]

He gave this whole speech about snakes and how to treat them in the wild.

[Phil Robertson]

I know that a lot of people are big on snakes.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. And I was like, I tell. I told Carter. Carter was kind of nervous. I said, you know what size is about that speech? Shoot them all, Jack.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, I love.

[Jase Robertson]

I don't like alligators. And I've only been alligator hunting one time. And I took somebody with me that knew a little bit more than me.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know who was playing. It was golf. Carter wants to kill in Florida.

[Si Robertson]

Happy Gilmore.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, and I'm talking. No, no, no. And I'm talking about. But there's some big gators out there. One of them was a three legged.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, he got. He got Chubbs his hand.

[Willie Robertson]

There was a three legged alligator.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no. Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

I ain't messing with no alligators, but as long as we're on land, I ain't afraid of a three legged alligator. That thing can't move fast.

[Phil Robertson]

He moved faster.

[Si Robertson]

You think he made it that long? He moved fast enough.

[Phil Robertson]

He moved faster than you think.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm not going to be.

[Si Robertson]

He moved faster than everybody else for a while. I ain't going to doubt him.

[Willie Robertson]

What a weird eye.

[Si Robertson]

You. Yeah, the boys saw me get bit by a snake yesterday. So it's fun.

[Willie Robertson]

What? Okay, now we're the end of it.

[Si Robertson]

I was trying to catch a little ribbon snake for him and he had a particularly sour attitude.

[Willie Robertson]

Did you stomp on him afterwards?

[Si Robertson]

No, I didn't stomp on him. He bit me. And Waylon goes, he. He bite you? I said, yeah, he bit me. I said, that's why we don't play with them. Like it was a good coaching moment for why they shouldn't play with snake.

[Willie Robertson]

We would have got Carter's.

[Phil Robertson]

High school young lady that was a tomboy. He was always chasing the guy that was scared of snake. She had a little green snake wrapped around her hand, y'all.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah, y'all, they're awesome.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, they had enough. One of them slipped up behind that she'd been chasing, and just prince that just cut that end of that tail snake off with his fingernail.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, poor guy.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, no. And hey, when he did, that sucker raised up like a king cobra.

[Si Robertson]

Well, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And hey, look. He lost her mind, went crazy. They took her to the nuthouse where she belonged. Okay, a plan was a stupid thing to begin with.

[Willie Robertson]

Amen, Hunter.

[Si Robertson]

Can we say nuthouse anymore?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, leave it in, boy.

[Willie Robertson]

Hey, whatever you do, don't throw it away. Hebrews 10:35. So do not throw away your confidence, for it will be richly rewarded. If you learn anything from us, learn that God loves you and you can have confidence in that. Don't throw it away.

[Phil Robertson]

Don't play with snakes.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Willie Robertson]

So don't play with snakes.

[Si Robertson]

Snakes on a plane. We'll see y'all next time right here in the duck call.

[Jase Robertson]

You can pop. You can pop the head off of one.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

I never know. I never heard that.

[Phil Robertson]

Seven foot. One of seven foot. Backpack.