John Luke Blames Willie for Giving Him Rabies

Summary

Podcast Summary: Duck Call Room – "John Luke Blames Willie for Giving Him Rabies"

Release Date: June 24, 2025

Welcome to the Duck Call Room, the lively podcast hosted by Si Robertson and Justin Martin, featuring regular contributors John Luke Owen, John Godwin, Jay Stone, and Phillip McMillan. In the episode titled "John Luke Blames Willie for Giving Him Rabies," the hosts delve into a variety of humorous and heartfelt stories, ranging from retail mishaps and parenting anecdotes to daring record attempts and personal mishaps. Below is a comprehensive summary of the episode's key discussions, complete with notable quotes and timestamps for reference.

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1. Navigating Disgruntled Customers in Retail

The episode kicks off with John Luke and Jacob sharing their experiences dealing with difficult customers in retail environments. John Luke humorously describes his strategy for coping with frustrating patrons:

John Luke [00:06]: "Would you like to become disgruntled with me? And then we're all disgruntled together."

Willie Robertson chimes in, reinforcing the idea that misery loves company:

Willie Robertson [00:16]: "Misery does love company, right?"

The hosts discuss the impact a single challenging customer can have on their day, emphasizing the camaraderie among staff when faced with such situations.

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2. The Decline of Walmart's Outdoor Section

Transitioning from retail frustrations, the conversation shifts to the diminishing presence of outdoor merchandise at Walmart. Si Robertson laments the changes:

Si Robertson [01:54]: "What are you in business for here?"

Willie adds his perspective on Walmart's shift from a legitimate tackle shop to a convenience store:

Willie Robertson [02:03]: "Once I did that, Walmart was a legit tackle shop. Now it's a convenience store that sells tackle."

The hosts express nostalgia for the days when Walmart's outdoor sections were better stocked, suggesting a need for a dedicated podcast episode on the topic.

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3. Overordering Pizza for a Bible Study

A humorous tale unfolds as the hosts recount the chaos of overordering pizzas for Allison's Bible study group. John Luke reveals the predicament:

John Luke [06:02]: "But I'm kind of hoping that. Because that's just 90 people signed up. What if 90 people bring a friend?"

Willie Robertson humorously compares their situation to biblical proportions:

Willie Robertson [06:07]: "We are in a crunch because we're going to have to go get two fishes and five loaves."

The group debates ways to handle the unexpectedly large turnout, showcasing their teamwork and wit in crisis management.

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4. Parenting and Creative Nicknaming

The discussion seamlessly moves to parenting stories, focusing on the unique nicknames bestowed upon their children. John Luke shares his playful moniker for his son:

John Luke [14:22]: "Smocky McSmockerton from Smockington, Downville ever since he was, like, born."

Mary Kate adds a relatable anecdote about maintaining childlike enthusiasm amidst parenting challenges:

Mary Kate [19:02]: "I appreciate y' all coming, because I wasn't even sure why I was there."

These stories highlight the camaraderie among the hosts as they navigate the joys and trials of parenthood together.

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5. Mary Kate's Bat Bite Incident

A standout moment in the episode features Mary Kate recounting a childhood incident involving a bat bite. She narrates the events leading up to needing rabies shots:

Mary Kate [19:28]: "I put on just some, like, latex kitchen gloves. I mean, that thing bit the crap out of me."

Willie Robertson empathizes with the severity of the situation:

Willie Robertson [20:15]: "I do a bat project in college. Those things bite the crap out of you."

The hosts blend humor and concern as they discuss the aftermath, including the communal response from family and friends.

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6. The Great Teacup Stacking Challenge

One of the episode's highlights is the ambitious attempt to stack 80,000 teacups, aiming to set a world record. Mary Kate details the strenuous process:

Mary Kate [36:07]: "We got to stack from 9am to 9pm every day for a week. Like 20 of us."

John Luke reflects on the challenges faced, such as inconsistent cup sizes and maintaining stack stability:

John Luke [37:05]: "Then they started getting off. So then we had to make the layers, like, we call them the green cups and then the yellow cups."

The endeavor culminates in a successful stack, impressively documented by the hosts:

Mary Kate [37:58]: "The entire gym. It can't be entire basketball gym. Completely solid of cups."

This segment underscores the hosts' teamwork and dedication, turning a quirky idea into a memorable achievement.

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7. Bigfoot Episode and Mythical Beliefs

Towards the latter part of the episode, the hosts delve into their fascination with mythical creatures, specifically Bigfoot. Mary Kate enthusiastically shares her belief:

Mary Kate [42:15]: "I'm a believer."

Si Robertson adds his own experiences, reminiscing about sightings:

Si Robertson [42:27]: "I'm serious. When I was a teenager."

The conversation reflects their openness to the unknown and sets the stage for an upcoming Bigfoot-themed episode, blending personal anecdotes with playful skepticism.

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8. Fun with Kids' Styles and Outfits

The discussion returns to the hosts' children, focusing on their distinctive styles and the creative nicknames they inspire. Willie Robertson highlights the remarkable cleanliness of John Luke's child:

Willie Robertson [45:35]: "How in the world you keep John Shepherd's clothes looking so clean is incredible."

Mary Kate counters with the energetic nature of their kids:

Mary Kate [45:37]: "So they just dress nice."

The hosts celebrate the individuality of their children, intertwining humor with heartfelt admiration.

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9. Bike Mishap and Embarrassing Moments

Adding to the episode's collection of entertaining stories, Mary Kate narrates a biking accident that left her embarrassed yet resilient:

Mary Kate [51:17]: "I was laying there, the bike's on top of me. My AirPods are still playing in my ear."

Willie Robertson humorously captures the ordeal:

Willie Robertson [53:19]: "For a long, long time."

John Luke concludes the segment with a heartwarming Bible verse that encapsulates the supportive nature of their community:

John Luke [53:30]: "First Timothy 4:12. Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example..."

This poignant moment reinforces the episode's blend of humor, vulnerability, and encouragement.

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Conclusion

In "John Luke Blames Willie for Giving Him Rabies," the Duck Call Room delivers an engaging mix of humor, personal stories, and camaraderie among family and friends. From retail frustrations and unexpected record attempts to heartfelt anecdotes about parenting and overcoming mishaps, the hosts provide a relatable and entertaining listen. Notable moments, such as Mary Kate's bat bite incident and the ambitious teacup stacking challenge, showcase the group's ability to turn everyday experiences into memorable tales. Whether discussing mythical creatures like Bigfoot or celebrating the quirks of their children, the episode embodies the essence of the Duck Call Room: a place where laughter and storytelling thrive.

Notable Quotes:

• John Luke [00:06]: "Would you like to become disgruntled with me? And then we're all disgruntled together."

• Mary Kate [19:28]: "I put on just some, like, latex kitchen gloves. I mean, that thing bit the crap out of me."

• Mary Kate [36:07]: "We got to stack from 9am to 9pm every day for a week. Like 20 of us."

• Mary Kate [42:15]: "I'm a believer."

• John Luke [53:30]: "First Timothy 4:12. Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech and conduct and love and faith and impurity."

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Whether you're a regular listener or tuning in for the first time, this episode of Duck Call Room offers a delightful blend of humor, stories, and genuine connections that capture the heart of the Robertson family and their friends.

Transcript

[John Luke]

Disgruntled. Like to go into retail stores and look at people like me and Jacob and say, would you like to become disgruntled with me? And then we're all disgruntled together.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, misery does love company, right?

[John Luke]

It's weird how it works. One customer can just throw you off for the rest of the day.

[Jacob]

No, definitely. Oh, you can't talk about it.

[John Luke]

Oh, we talk about it. As soon as the door closes, I let everyone else in the room know that I don't like that person.

[Jacob]

Yeah, yeah, but you can't, like. I'm not about to out people on here that I've had customers in the past have done that, you know.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, you're not going. You're not going to give their name? No license?

[Jacob]

No, I had someone do that.

[John Luke]

I could, though, because it was over.

[Jacob]

And their credit card information. No, I'm just kidding. I had someone do that the other day, and Bella had to hold me back from just, like, wanted to just.

[Willie Robertson]

Tell them all, the problem is size on the side of the customer. Because I've been known to go into retail stores and just make his own thing and say, that's what I want to buy.

[Jacob]

That looks like he.

[Si]

Oh, no. Hey, they get a mouthful when they.

[Willie Robertson]

That's what I'm talking about. That's the problem is size. The disgruntled shop. You know, he's. He being quiet over there because he's that guy. But you know what that comes with age?

[Si]

Well, I mean, don't know. No, it comes when you run up on stupid people.

[Jacob]

All right, now we're back in the saddle, boys.

[Si]

No, no, because, hey, look, you're there. You're there to sell merchandise.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, Right.

[Si]

So I come in and I find what I want right now. Hey, first I've got to take it apart because I don't want this part. I want the other part. Well, I take it apart, I make what I want, and then I go up there and I hate said, sir, how. Wait, what did you do here? I said, I found the rod and the reel. I want.

[John Luke]

It's not how it works.

[Si]

I said, hey, ring it up and let me pay for it.

[Jacob]

Interesting.

[Si]

And he said, oh, no, we don't sell them in that combination.

[Willie Robertson]

See?

[Si]

Wait a minute. Hold it, hold it. You don't what? Well, he said, we don't sell them in that combination. I said, you're a fool.

[John Luke]

That's what you get for shopping at Walmart for your bait and tackle needs.

[Si]

Well, no, no, but it's just what I want and then they won't sell it to me.

[Willie Robertson]

Once I did that, Walmart was a legit tackle shop. Now it's a convenience store that sells tackle.

[Si]

And I said, wait a minute. What are you in business for here?

[John Luke]

Yeah, we actually need to do a whole podcast on what happened to the outdoor section at Walmart because it actually.

[Willie Robertson]

Used to be legit.

[Si]

Then I could add in there and hey, and usually these ones run up on person ain't got a personality. We could send them down to Walmart and they could find one, but they.

[Willie Robertson]

Don'T even sell them no more.

[Si]

And they don't even sell that more.

[Jacob]

Size the type of person. This isn't Nike idea.

[Si]

What's this world coming to? Good. Great.

[Jacob]

This isn't customizable shoes.

[John Luke]

He's customizing everything.

[Jacob]

Size. The one that bought buys a shirt, makes it a crop top, then doesn't like the fit. You know what I mean?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

Do people do that to you?

[Jacob]

I mean, I'm just saying that's a.

[John Luke]

Theoretical thing that has happened to you.

[Mary Kate]

That could happen.

[John Luke]

Somebody cut a shirt and then said they.

[Jacob]

I mean, did they try and retire? No, I'm just saying you can cut it wrong.

[Si]

That's what happened.

[Jacob]

It looks like he buys a pair of shoes and wears them three times and then testes the warranty out. You know what I mean?

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, no, no, no.

[Si]

Well, not.

[Willie Robertson]

He sends me to do all of his bidding on footwear. I found those babies on ebay.

[Si]

Oh, have y' all tried the new slip on tennis shoes?

[John Luke]

What are you.

[Jacob]

Why do you need slip on tennis?

[Si]

That's all over the television.

[John Luke]

That's all they show Fox News, everybody. He watches Fox News and lots of it.

[Jacob]

If you watch Duck Dynasty this Sunday, you'll see slip on tennis shoes commercials.

[Willie Robertson]

Do they?

[John Luke]

Well, no bug assault.

[Si]

No, because that's all.

[John Luke]

If you want more commercials, holla at me.

[Willie Robertson]

We'll hold them in here.

[Si]

That's like the best commercial there is. Is the scroll that says, hey, we.

[Willie Robertson]

Do have a certain demographic, don't we?

[John Luke]

And if you don't know it, you ain't paying attention.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, I love it.

[John Luke]

I do have a fun story.

[Willie Robertson]

About what?

[John Luke]

About your wife.

[Willie Robertson]

What? My wife? What they do.

[Si]

So say anything about Britney's fun.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. And Allison.

[John Luke]

So they're doing this Bible study as part of Sadie's live original local thing.

[Si]

Okay, That's a good one.

[Jacob]

That's good.

[John Luke]

It's tonight.

[Si]

That's it.

[John Luke]

Are you aware of how many pizzas they have ordered?

[Willie Robertson]

No.

[Jacob]

Can we all guess.

[John Luke]

Guess how many pizzas.

[Si]

14.

[John Luke]

Incorrect.

[Willie Robertson]

No, that's way too many.

[John Luke]

Correct.

[Willie Robertson]

These are women. Order.

[Mary Kate]

Well, he changed my ad.

[Si]

Oh, well, hey, take away one.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't even know.

[John Luke]

Take away one because they gave him a budget.

[Si]

Then you come up with four.

[Jacob]

Five.

[Si]

Four.

[John Luke]

Very close. We're at six pizzas. Okay. And they. They gave them a bunch.

[Willie Robertson]

I'm about to donate to the Ello ministry just so they don't run out of pizza.

[Jacob]

You can do this. Donation of pizza, my friend.

[John Luke]

We are in a crunch because we're going to have to go get two fishes and five loaves. Are you aware of how many people have signed up to come to this? Six pizzas.

[Jacob]

How many?

[John Luke]

90.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, they better hope. Jesus in that room. They better hope. Where two or three are gathered, he's actually there. If not, we in a bind.

[John Luke]

Allison said it's a Bible study. I said that's a church service. Once you reach 90, you're at a.

[Si]

Oh, yeah, they're in a Bible study.

[Willie Robertson]

And that's at your sister's place.

[Si]

Yeah. You start your own.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, it's at his sister's place.

[Si]

Your own congregation with 90 people.

[Jacob]

Hey, you need 15 people per parking.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, which I was trying to do the math. You need to go get a clothes rack and put in there. Your sister's place.

[Si]

Kill him.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, we could all do something on here.

[John Luke]

I sell worms. Sell some shiners.

[Jacob]

Let's just get a signer set up in there with a five gallon bucket.

[John Luke]

I'm in. Don't fear me.

[Willie Robertson]

Hey, they'll probably be trying to filet them if they run out.

[Si]

If they run out of.

[John Luke]

But they thought there was 20 people. 25 tops. And now there's 90.

[Willie Robertson]

I learned.

[John Luke]

I think adjustments have been made.

[Willie Robertson]

Get on.

[John Luke]

But I'm kind of hoping that. Because that's just 90 people signed up. What if 90 people bring a friend?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, they didn't.

[Jacob]

They didn't.

[Willie Robertson]

Or kids. Or like, who. What if they're bringing their child? Like, what if. Yeah, that's about.

[John Luke]

I can eat our pizza easily by myself.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, that's. Yeah. I'm going to have to make a donation.

[Jacob]

Who's the pizza? Like, who's the caterer?

[Willie Robertson]

Pizza.

[John Luke]

I believe. I believe we were going Johnny's because we got a rebel card. So we get 10% off.

[Jacob]

We might have to get that Little Caesars hiding ready.

[John Luke]

You need.

[Jacob]

We might get a hot.

[John Luke]

I do think adjustments have been made, but, man, it's been funny to watch Alison scramble.

[Willie Robertson]

Like to feed 90 people, you know what has never happened in their life that they. It's obvious that neither one of them have ever worked for Willie Robertson. Because I have seen places run out of food before that Willie was involved with. And to this day, he still makes fun of them. Like, that's just. I learned early on just from watching whatever happens over order. Whatever happened, you. You much rather have leftovers than run out.

[John Luke]

Remember when I canceled the lobster?

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, buddy.

[John Luke]

He brings it up every time.

[Willie Robertson]

He brought it up yesterday.

[John Luke]

Why he bring.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't know. He was.

[John Luke]

I wasn't even here.

[Willie Robertson]

I know. He was just passing in conversation. He's like, yeah, one time Johnny D canceled the lobster.

[Jacob]

The receipt was just due that day.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, it just. Yeah. You don't.

[John Luke]

We ate dinner.

[Willie Robertson]

You never run out of food.

[John Luke]

We didn't need second dinner.

[Jacob]

I will say he is the best person I've seen as a solo person to cater for big groups of people.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Because he's not going to run. He will.

[Jacob]

And he'll just keep cooking. Yeah, exactly. While you're there, he will just keep going.

[Willie Robertson]

He'll keep going. And the key is wait to eat what he eats. Like, don't eat the stuff he throws out there for everybody first. Because he's the king. To get everybody full.

[John Luke]

And all of a sudden the good wine.

[Si]

And he brings out the good wine.

[Willie Robertson]

But see, like your mom does that. I think it just comes with age. Like, mom. Your mom. When we went over for your birthday party, there were. How many people were there? 10, 12. Well, five. And then y' all have five. So there's 10. Your mom and dad 12.

[Mary Kate]

15.

[John Luke]

Ish.

[Willie Robertson]

Plus. Yeah. So about 16.

[John Luke]

Oh, Janice ain't gonna run out of food.

[Willie Robertson]

His mom had enough food to feed. Well, you know, everybody in this office, like, you never know what stragglers are.

[John Luke]

Gonna end up over there from Willie's.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. What? Strays.

[John Luke]

Christian showed up one time and it was like, we better have a wheelbarrow full of shrimp.

[Jacob]

That is true.

[John Luke]

And so Mom's like. And she does.

[Willie Robertson]

You know, she shops in bulk.

[John Luke]

She's planning lunch out for the family for the next day. Big Dave. Big Dave cooks his lunch and dinner.

[Jacob]

She shops at Sam's, you know.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

I love that place.

[Willie Robertson]

Guarantee you she had 10 pounds of tater tots. I mean, that was the most 10 pound bag. Oh, that was the most insane tray of tater tots.

[Jacob]

Never a bad thing.

[John Luke]

No spando expense for a baby's birthday.

[Jacob]

Sonic couldn't even keep up with that.

[Willie Robertson]

I mean, it was unbelievable. I walked in and I was like, wow, that's a mountain of food for. For a guy turning 36. Like, this isn't even, like a big one.

[Jacob]

That was just his trip.

[John Luke]

You should have seen Father's Day. Dad had to cook it, but, I mean, there was some food. Son, I might have a pict. Also. Jacob's joined us today, in case you haven't. We never introduced Jacob. It was supposed to be John Luke.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, he's a regular.

[Jacob]

Well, if, you know, if you ever been on, like, a Dixie League all star team, you know how they, like, have a little alternate. Like a little substitution guy. That's kind of what happened.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, yeah.

[Jacob]

Your utility and just alternating in for the. For the starter.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

Just in case. Move.

[Willie Robertson]

I don't know. John Luke, as he's getting older, he's trying to turn into his dad, which then punctuality just becomes a recommendation. Right.

[John Luke]

It's not even a thing.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, it's. Yeah. I don't know.

[Jacob]

We might be done by the time it gets here, to be honest.

[John Luke]

There's a solid chance.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, there is a solid chance. Oh, he's very busy, though.

[Jacob]

Yeah. I mean, he's been. I want to say what he was doing yesterday, but got a lot on it hadn't come out.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. We can't talk about.

[Jacob]

That's like ten years away, so. Yeah, that's a decade investment.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Jacob and I filmed with John Luke yesterday, so. And I gotta film with him again today. He better be on time this afternoon because it's gonna be hot and we're outside, so he better be on time.

[John Luke]

I don't know what we're talking about, but tune in on the first.

[Willie Robertson]

Ladies and gentlemen, starter is here. The starter is here. So I guess now we'll take a break and let Jacob step out.

[John Luke]

Thanks, Jake.

[Willie Robertson]

Let John Luke step in. Thanks. Thanks, Jacob. Appreciate you.

[John Luke]

You know what Brittney loves about this podcast?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, it ain't S. She does love that she got introduced Neutrophil, which is kind of funny because we were. Me and John David, another buddy of ours, Chad Creel. All of us and our wives were sitting around the table the other night. And Chad's wife, I looked at Brittany was like, man, your hair looks great after having kids. Mine has just been thin and all this ever since I've had the kids. And Brittany was like, is Neutrophil? And she was like, oh, really? My wife is on it.

[John Luke]

And while she's taking it, I'm like.

[Willie Robertson]

Baby, you look great.

[John Luke]

Yeah, awesome.

[Willie Robertson]

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[John Luke]

My sister heard us talking about it. She was like I'm interested. So her birthday and Christmas about six months apart. So every birthday and Christmas get a.

[Willie Robertson]

Little, get a little surprise. Hey, best thing, it's easy, it's repeatable. They love it. Start your hair growth journey with Nutrafol. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping. When you go to nutrifold.com and enter the promo code, find out why Nutrifol is the best selling hair growth supplement [e-mail] spelled n u t r-a f o l.com promo code. That's nutrafol.com promo code.

[John Luke]

We're back.

[Willie Robertson]

We're back baby. We're back with John Luke. Our intended guest Jacob stepped in because John Luke was running a little behind. But hey man, he's got three toddlers.

[Mary Kate]

So I was the kids. I'm blaming it on them this morning.

[Si]

To be fair, I have always a good excuse. I have a kids.

[John Luke]

I do have a new favorite thing in life.

[Willie Robertson]

What's that?

[John Luke]

John Luke's wife has this motorized bicycle with a trailer. And then there's two other kids that have little tiny motorized bicycles. They're like electric bikes.

[Si]

Yeah, I seen that the other day.

[John Luke]

And they'll and Mary Kate will just be in a dress and it feels like she should have like sourdough and eggs riding the bike and all the little children behind her. And it makes me happy when I see it just riding around the neighborhood piper.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. They look like little, like. Like dirt bikes.

[John Luke]

Yeah, it's like a little House on the Prairie had electric engines.

[Mary Kate]

Oh. Because they're all. Yeah. Ella's always wearing a dress. John Shepard's always in his little smock.

[John Luke]

He's smocked up.

[Mary Kate]

Smocked up. And they're just tearing up the streets in those little electric dirt bikes.

[John Luke]

I'll send pictures to Allison if I see him. I'm like, there's what you should have done, Alison. They have it figured out.

[Willie Robertson]

I got to be honest. I say sheppy in them smocks, and I'm just thankful Brittany didn't put in a smocker. I don't know. I don't know.

[Mary Kate]

They're not even smocks. Dad just calls them smocks. It's just like a nice clothes that's just.

[Willie Robertson]

It's just. It's just mom style. Right.

[Mary Kate]

Clothes for a child.

[Willie Robertson]

It's like, they're just so white, like.

[Mary Kate]

Button up shirt for a child.

[John Luke]

That is one of my favorite nicknames of all time, though, that your dad's ever hung on it. So John Luke's oldest child dresses nicer than most people.

[Willie Robertson]

Absolutely.

[John Luke]

Not even kids.

[Willie Robertson]

And pulls it off.

[John Luke]

Most people.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

A handsome young man.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Pulls it off.

[John Luke]

And Willie has called him Smocky McSmockerton from Smockington, Downville ever since he was, like, born. And he probably wore a smock once.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, he did.

[John Luke]

And then Willie was like, oh, Smocky Mc.

[Si]

That was like. That was like Christine, one of her y' all, by her family. This kid was so weird. He never got dirty.

[Willie Robertson]

Never got dirty.

[Si]

Yeah. He wore white. Yeah, he wore white, and he never got dirty. You could take him fishing, and he would come back spotless.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, no.

[Si]

I said, what is wrong with you?

[Willie Robertson]

That is not John Shepherd.

[Mary Kate]

No, he's gonna get dirty.

[Si]

I just looked and I said, wait a minute. This kid. I said, this kid, Something's wrong with him. And his mom said, what do you mean? I said, no kid goes where it's white and then goes somewhere like playing out the yard and come back in as, you know, like, he just put it on.

[Willie Robertson]

Forget kid. There's a reason I wear camo most of the time, because it hides all the stains. I just get crap all over me.

[John Luke]

Well, and just so we are clear, John Luke's oldest child, John shepherd, is not a clean child.

[Mary Kate]

No.

[John Luke]

If you see that kid, there is an off chance he's got some form of animal on him. We're not sure what it Is.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, yeah, and he's got mud up to his ears most of the time.

[John Luke]

And he is just now swimming out of a pond somewhere.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, no, he'll come back just disgusting. America will just throw him in another smock, suit him back up.

[Willie Robertson]

Running back.

[John Luke]

He reminds me of this kid I grew up around named John Luke. That's who he reminds me.

[Willie Robertson]

Which kudos to Mary Kay's laundry skills.

[John Luke]

She's got them.

[Willie Robertson]

You would. Unless she just throws them away. Unless she's got a drawer full of them and just chunks them. They're always clean the next time, you see.

[Si]

Oh, that's what I always like about Mary Kay. You know, he'll be running somewhere when I'm willing and. Yeah, yell at him. Oh, it's okay.

[Willie Robertson]

They'd be fine. Yeah, it'd be fine. But your kids did get like the worst nicknames. What does Willie have against your kid? What does your father have against his grandkids? Fathered by you. So we got Smocky McSmockerson.

[Mary Kate]

That's John Shepard, the five year old. And then Jabba is a four year old daughter.

[Si]

I know where, though. Yeah, but.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, she's got that look.

[Si]

You'll give me that look sometime. Enough. Okay? Yeah, okay.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, well, when. I mean, when she was a month old. Yeah, Yeah, I look like Jabba the Hut. But now she's four.

[John Luke]

It's not gonna be cute when she's 16.

[Willie Robertson]

And then my favorite one is this.

[Mary Kate]

And then Wells is the toad.

[Willie Robertson]

Because it's so funny, because every time I see Wells, he's squatting, so he looks like.

[Mary Kate]

He does look like a toad.

[Willie Robertson]

He squats down, puts his hands on the ground, and he just like, he's sitting in jump position.

[Mary Kate]

Well, now he started like hopping, so now he's full toed. He's embraced it.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, you called me that long enough. I guess I just need to wear it, right?

[John Luke]

Well, he'll do that to a person. He will call them something for so long, they just become that.

[Si]

He got that quite naturally from Phil. Phil.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, man.

[Si]

If you had a. Something wrong with you.

[John Luke]

Oh, boy. You know.

[Si]

You know you're. That's gonna be your nickname.

[John Luke]

Well, Ben's has a. He had a 1 haircut that was basically a bowl cut. And he's been Mr. Spock ever since. For 10 years. Really? Well, not eight years. Will they? Look at that king. Hey, Mr. Spock. And Ben's like, dad, I don't. I don't. What's Mr. Spock? I'm like, you had A haircut one time.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si]

Once it.

[Willie Robertson]

Once it gets hung, it's there. So it's. At least it's not mud in the butt. He had, that kid.

[John Luke]

Oh, Kyle.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

Old mud in his butt mud. He was out at Camp Chioka. He went, mom, I got mud in my butt. Mud puddle. And Willie heard it. And if Willie sees. This man is 35 years old, and if Willie sees him in town, he'll go, hey, mudding his butt. Yeah, you got. You don't have to do that anymore. He's still gonna do it.

[Si]

Sure you do.

[John Luke]

Yeah, but he didn't nickname his children that.

[Mary Kate]

Hey, we never got nicknames.

[Willie Robertson]

Which is crazy, because everybody that touches him has a nickname. I guess if you live with him, you're safe. I don't know.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, I think there's just too much going on. There's just the nicknames would change too much because there's such weird stuff happening.

[John Luke]

That was an interesting household growing up. Was it? Remember when you got bit by a bat and we had to all show up to the hospital for some reason?

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. I appreciate y' all coming, because I.

[John Luke]

Don'T know why I was there.

[Mary Kate]

I was, like, foaming at the mouth, and everyone thought I was gonna die.

[Willie Robertson]

Were you really?

[John Luke]

No, not at all.

[Mary Kate]

I wasn't. But I did. No. So dad found this bat in the toilet at camp, and so he brought it up and put in a birdcage and.

[Si]

Leave it. Hey, yeah, Leave it. Yeah, yeah, that. That sounds right.

[John Luke]

Bat in a birdcage.

[Mary Kate]

So we have this. The bird cage that. Previously in the bird cage was birds that I died or something. So we had the bat, the birdcage, and he told me, don't. Don't pick it up without gloves. We didn't specify, like, leather gloves. So I put on just some, like, latex kitchen gloves. I mean, that thing bit the crap out of me.

[John Luke]

I remember it was a panic in the whole city.

[Si]

Oh, no.

[Mary Kate]

And everybody can't see it. Look, that's the scar you can't see.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, wow.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Okay.

[Si]

Everybody panicked when it did.

[Willie Robertson]

It looks like a snake bite. You could tell that story however you want to.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

What a bad is.

[Mary Kate]

And so you. I mean, if you're listening, you can't see it, but obviously it bit me on the hand. And so then they were like. They had to send off a rabies shot. I had to go get the shots of my stomach, like these giant needles. Oh, I had to do all the rabies shots.

[Willie Robertson]

Now, I will say to confirm that is not I don't. I wasn't there, but I did a bat project in college. Those things bite the crap out of you, like the little power and those jaws.

[Si]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

But hey, now, we did welding gloves, so we were. We were fine.

[John Luke]

But I think that's what Willie meant. He just. Well, he's not a great communicator.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, but we were also 22, 23. So, like, how old were you?

[Mary Kate]

It's like seven. Yeah, like six or seven.

[John Luke]

That's my memories of John Luke growing up, though, because I was the youngest grandchild, and then the oldest granddaughter had this son who was the oldest grandchild. And every. When John Luke was born, there was 752 people at the hospital. It was impressive. Like, you set a record for Glenwood. I remember it. And I was like, good night.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, she's a kid. Like, what the world.

[John Luke]

It was impressive.

[Willie Robertson]

Who we give birth to Jesus.

[John Luke]

And I always remember. I mean, Chris and Johnny calling. My mom just panicked. John Luke's got rabies. Oh, man, it was awesome.

[Willie Robertson]

The whole. The whole circle came together, the whole neighborhood.

[John Luke]

And your dad was already a big fan. Well, your grandparents, Johnny and Chris were already a big fan of Willie still at that time. So whenever he got you bit by bat, it was awesome.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

No special powers or anything.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. I mean, sometimes on the full moon, I get itchy, but.

[Willie Robertson]

That'S a shame. You get bit by a bat, you can't even fly.

[Mary Kate]

I go, like, full. I go full turn and.

[Si]

Oh, no.

[John Luke]

I hate bugs.

[Willie Robertson]

Bugs.

[Si]

Well, look, that's the time of the year.

[John Luke]

It is.

[Willie Robertson]

Nothing's worse.

[John Luke]

Why do they want in my house so bad, Martin?

[Willie Robertson]

The same reason you want to live there. The same reason you don't live out there where they do.

[John Luke]

This is what I use, Martin. Whenever I said, ants be gone, I had this one mixed up.

[Willie Robertson]

This.

[Si]

Yeah, this one got to water and.

[John Luke]

Said all around the house. It's really so easy.

[Willie Robertson]

It is easy.

[Si]

He thought he was Harry Potter.

[Willie Robertson]

You get to do it yourself and put a lot of money right back in your pocket. Because pest control companies can cost you, you know, $800 a year. But for just $35, a treatment, pesty can help you out. You do it yourself, on your schedule. And you know the stuff they send you. Kid, Kid and pet friendly man. So.

[John Luke]

Which we all have kids and pets.

[Willie Robertson]

And their kit includes a reusable electronic sprayer, a mixing bag, pesticide gloves, and instructions. You can complete the application in less than 10 minutes. You can get rid of over 100 types of bugs. From spiders and ants to roaches and stink bugs with pigs. Pesty's customized formula. Look, I done told you. They're kid and pet friendly. The pesticides that they ship are fully registered. Had been used in hospitals and schools all over the country. Plus, with Pesty's 100% bug free guarantee, if the bugs don't go away, they'll give you a full refund. So you want to save money. You want somebody stands behind their product. Our friends over at Pesty can help you do all of those things. That's nice of them and it can help you keep the great outdoors outdoors. But if they do try to get in, you know you're protected. With Pesty. Now is the best time to protect your home from bugs with pesty. Go to pesky.com for an extra 10% off your order. That's P-E-S-T I e.com duck for an extra 10% off.

[Si]

I was young. I got bit by a squirrel. And that sucker paralyzed me. I'm serious. He bit me right here. And I just.

[Willie Robertson]

On the finger.

[Si]

Oh, yeah.

[John Luke]

And you were paralyzed.

[Si]

I got them teeth that come down and.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, I know they got big.

[Si]

And hey, you saw my jaw power. But he met his mat because I threw him up a little cherry berry tree. And then I got my dog out. We had some fun.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, here we go.

[Mary Kate]

We had a flying squirrel too, at one point.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, that bite you?

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. And eventually got loose in the house, but we had that in the rat cage because we had rats at one point.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, everybody had gerbils and hamsters. No, no.

[John Luke]

Nobody had as many pets as John Luke.

[Si]

Yeah, I think mama had just brought a brand new couch. We always had pet squirrels, y' all, but we had pets. Cat, squirrel, me. Bad move. He got on her brand new couch and just to all the. All the cotton out of it. And when you sit down, it's sticky. The spring was sticky.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, the fun part is John Luke still got wild pets. He got a dragon back there in that office.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, yeah. No, now I'm trying to get all these pets for my kids now, like reliving. We had salamanders, rats, newts.

[Si]

Got one.

[John Luke]

Dingo.

[Willie Robertson]

Dingo.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, the dogs.

[John Luke]

Dingo is one of the greatest stories of all time.

[Willie Robertson]

Dingo just walked up.

[John Luke]

Where did Dingo. Dingo was your dog, right?

[Mary Kate]

Dingoes. So Dingo was there when we. We had moved. Just moved into Lakeland Garden. And this dog with like six puppies just like rolled up. And so we were like feeding it and then they all disappeared, except for Dingo, which is just a puppy. And I was like, well, you're my dog now.

[Willie Robertson]

And what a name.

[Mary Kate]

Never left. Yeah, Dingo.

[Willie Robertson]

The dingo ate the baby. What a name.

[John Luke]

Dingo was around for like 15 years.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, Dingo snuffed out every new dog that come around there.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Until Biscuit showed up.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

Oh, that's funny.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. If a new dog showed up, Dingo was like, hey, let me go show you this road over here. Real fun to play on. Yeah, it's run out there.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. Dingo survived. After Dingo outlived 10 dogs in the.

[Willie Robertson]

Family, the last thing you want to be is a Robertson pet. So, like, that's just.

[Si]

I mean, they don't.

[Mary Kate]

I take care of my pet.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But problem is he don't get all of them. Some of them just show up there and the next thing you know, I remember John Luke's like coming to a man deal from Corey because Corey ran over. Which one was the first one, Max or Louis?

[Mary Kate]

Max was. That was.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, Maxi.

[Mary Kate]

Corey was a Chihuahua.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, little. Little long haired Chihuahua. Sleeping by Corey's tire. A little too close and walk.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

So Corey called me. I was at Waffle House. Shocker. Eating breakfast.

[John Luke]

What year was this?

[Willie Robertson]

Probably 2009 or 2010. Maybe 11. Somewhere in there. Back when I was on my every day at the Waffle House with the old man, get rid of the dog. Back when I was bumping about 320, couldn't figure out why the three eggs over easy, a large hash brows didn't help anything. But she called me and I was like, okay, you know, I'll come help, whatever. Like, I'll come help. And then she called me back, she said, I'm so proud John Luke's gonna do it. And I was like, oh, well, that once you bury a pet, that's a stage into becoming a man. And so like, it was, you know, John Luke buried Maxie and I did.

[Mary Kate]

I buried Max. But then I became like the dog barrier.

[Willie Robertson]

Then he got hung with a task.

[Mary Kate]

Like, Jason's dog died.

[Si]

I like a call, oh, John Luke's undertaker.

[Mary Kate]

I went over to bury their dog. Drew's dog died. I buried his dog.

[John Luke]

Were you there with Drew?

[Willie Robertson]

Barry and Drew's dog?

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

I didn't know you were part of this. I just always pictured Drew out there sad.

[Mary Kate]

I didn't know he had company. He like rolled up. It was like, oh, my dog just died. He was like, I need Some. I can't do it. Yeah. He's like, cries, eyes out. I'm like, burying his dog. I married, like, six dogs in, like, two years.

[Si]

Oh, one of them.

[Mary Kate]

Only one.

[Si]

Look.

[John Luke]

That's rich. Hey, Drew paid it forward. Drew buried Dublin while I just sat there, cried and watched. I was like, I can't.

[Willie Robertson]

I remember the first time I had to bury a pet. Man, that's a tough. That's a tough task. When it's your pet, you got the shovel.

[John Luke]

I told you the story. The first dog I had to bury, right when my granddaddy called me.

[Willie Robertson]

No. Said Puppy died, but I mentioned his name was Puppy.

[John Luke]

Yeah. And he weighed 150 pounds.

[Si]

Puppy.

[John Luke]

Puppy was. Puppy was not a good weight. He called me. My granddaddy was so sad. He said, puppy's dead. Can you come help me bury it? And I go out there and I said, where is. He Said, he's under the porch. We're a little redneck dog died under the porch. So I'm looking. I said, grandaddy ain't no. I ain't gonna lose this dog. He ain't under there. He said, no, he's dead under there. Next thing I know, Puppy comes walking up looking at me, and I said, he's not dead.

[Willie Robertson]

He changed his name.

[John Luke]

And Granddaddy started laughing. Well, he died later that day. And so then we had to bury him, but that was the deepest. So he went. He was in Vietnam with you. Sigh. And they had a way about him where everything had to be done right into specification.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, you had a tape measure. You got six foot deep, huh?

[John Luke]

No. Oh, like eight.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, extra.

[John Luke]

I dug that hole so deep, I'll never. I was like, Dublin Barry. Barely under the ground. He might show back up one day.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, you got to get them deep enough where you don't smell it, you.

[John Luke]

Know, like, this dog got deep.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, man. What? You hear the people talking outside? We're filming Duck Dynasty in the office.

[John Luke]

Today, so something was throwing me off.

[Willie Robertson]

We get a strange cast of characters. Walk through that door today. Don't worry about that.

[John Luke]

Was throwing me off.

[Willie Robertson]

We all. We all just. We're the cool place to hang out. But, no, it's kind of funny. We've been doing this however long this first time we've had John Luke, I said, you know, I think it's just because you're here. Like, we always were quick to grab the people that aren't here because, like, oh, we don't know when we'll see him again. But John Luke's here pretty much every day. So you just. Some of that stuff just kind of flies right by you.

[John Luke]

What episode is this, Hunter?

[Mary Kate]

459.

[Willie Robertson]

9. 450.

[John Luke]

459. And here.

[Mary Kate]

Here I am. I've set in. I've been in the room for like four of them.

[Willie Robertson]

Just never behind the mic.

[Mary Kate]

Just never on the mic.

[John Luke]

You've got good stories that we.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, man, I. Yeah, I just. I never knew you were a dog undertaker. I like that. That's a. It's an interesting. I know who to call.

[John Luke]

I cannot wait to call my brother in law. And now that I know the truth.

[Willie Robertson]

Of the story, there you go. But no. What. I don't know what you want to talk about. John Luke. The world, your oyster.

[John Luke]

Like, there's a small TV show going on.

[Willie Robertson]

We can talk about this now because it just aired, but we. So we're back obviously filming the show. John Luke's a much bigger part in this one than he was.

[John Luke]

He was a rather large part in the other one.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, well, Bumblebee Tuna and all the things, right? He got us. He got us.

[John Luke]

Actually, we gotta go down the road. I've been a little upset for going on about 10 years now. Where'd you get Bumblebee Tuna from?

[Mary Kate]

That was the Ace Ventura. Yeah.

[John Luke]

Just making sure we knew that because there was an older cousin you had. He was cool. He lived down the street from you. He said it all the time. Yeah. And then all of a sudden you made it famous. So I was just wondering if you remembered it was Ace Ventura 2 quote, I'm cool with you now.

[Mary Kate]

Oh, no. I knew. Oh, no. So when I did. Well, let me, let me back up. I was. I was a small part of the show, but the parts that I did were rememberable, were very memorable, were very big. And so on the. Whenever I was prepping for the. Getting my wisdom teeth out, I was like, oh, I know it needs to be funny. Which, like, it was totally. I don't remember any of it, but I was like, prepping. And so I was like, oh, I'm gonna watch some, like, funny movies. So I watched Pet Detective Call the Wild, Nacho Libre.

[John Luke]

Bravo.

[Mary Kate]

I watched all the hits.

[Si]

Conway did something like you did in the dentist office. That was. Yo. I. I heard all over and it was, you know, he stuck himself with a syringe and, you know, they got goofy. But I watched that, I laughed. That was. That was excellent. I'm talking about, you're in the dentist office.

[John Luke]

You hit all my favorite movies. Of all time. You're just ripping them off one at a time. I'm like, I love this. Oh, yeah, exactly.

[Si]

Shine. Big time.

[Mary Kate]

The Griswolds hot rod.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, man, that's John Luke.

[John Luke]

I like to party.

[Willie Robertson]

That's all the great ones, man.

[Mary Kate]

I like to party.

[John Luke]

I like to party. You can't say you like to party. I already said that. Anyway.

[Willie Robertson]

For something that requires attention, like listening to a podcast, we do talk a lot about sleeping.

[Si]

Why sleep?

[John Luke]

Because our friends at MyPillow have a passion to help everyone get the best sleep of their life.

[Willie Robertson]

They didn't stop at just creating the pillow. They've made the best bed sheets ever too, man.

[John Luke]

It can't stop. They won't stop.

[Willie Robertson]

And I don't know what to tell you. I mean, the sheets, they look, they feel great, all the things. Which means an even better night's sleep for all of us, which is crucial. Oh, for a man like, sigh. You know, once you get to that.

[Si]

Age, you gotta have your beauty rest.

[Willie Robertson]

There you go, Look. So my pillow is now offering the best deal on their Giza Dream bed sheets. Any size, any color. Just 49.98.

[John Luke]

That's it.

[Willie Robertson]

49.98. That's right. You can even get queens, Kings, Split kings, cow kings, Roman kings. No, I don't know. I'm just making up kings now.

[John Luke]

Canadian king.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, any size, any color. Just 49.98. Order now, because when they're gone, they're gone. And also for a limited time, when your order is over a hundred dollars, you will receive $100 in free digital gifts. Y' all know we've been on here a lot. The pillows, fantastic. The robes, phenomenal.

[Si]

Oh, hey, excellent.

[Willie Robertson]

That's what I'm talking about.

[John Luke]

The sheets.

[Si]

Sheets.

[John Luke]

Top notch slippers.

[Si]

Sleeping on clowns.

[Willie Robertson]

Number one cause of dry skin. Yeah, number one cause dry skin. My pillow towels, they're so good, they.

[John Luke]

Still even got a phone number where you can call and order.

[Willie Robertson]

That's what I'm talking about. America, baby.

[John Luke]

Thank you.

[Willie Robertson]

That's what I'm talking. And if you do want to take advantage of these great deals, call 1-800-969-3137. Use the promo code DUCK. Or go to mypillow.com duck for the amazing offer of 49.98 on the Giza Dream bed sheets. Any size, any color. That Number again is 1-800-969-3137. Use the promo code Duck. With John Luke's guidance, I mean, I think we pulled off A world record. Did we get it certified?

[Mary Kate]

Not Guinness Book certified, but we did beat it.

[Willie Robertson]

We did.

[Mary Kate]

And we have the whole thing on camera.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, so. So we could get it certified.

[John Luke]

We got to get that certified also. What are we talking about?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, well, we had a problem that somebody back in the day, and I can't, I can't blame them, ordered a little too many of these, these jewels. Right.

[John Luke]

Whenever old boy fell asleep on the. On the zero button on.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, he must have fell asleep on the zero and then scratched his nose on the inner key because that's how many we got. And. But now we still had a bunch of them. So then we did a deal, like with the employees, like come up with something like something clever to use these cups for.

[John Luke]

Well, of course, Mystery boxes.

[Willie Robertson]

Those were all a wash. But then John Luke was like, well, let's. I saw this deal. Let's stack them babies up.

[Mary Kate]

And so we stacked them up.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, they stacked them. I did not stack them them up.

[John Luke]

How many sack ups did you stack up?

[Mary Kate]

What was it, 80,000?

[John Luke]

Yeah, we still got 80,000 of them things.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, not anymore.

[Mary Kate]

Well, we sold a lot of them. But yeah, the record was. The record was like 72,000. And so we were going for 100,000. But then once we got to 80, we were like, yeah, this is. We beat it. This is good enough.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. I showed up out there while they were stacking one day with my kids that I quickly realized my error. Like, I saw Jackson and Wayland see just a big wall of chartreuse. And there they go, hands out. And I was like, yeah, no, we gotta get out of here.

[John Luke]

Yeah. Because Hunter panics every time I throw anything in that direction.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

And we only have like 20 cups stacked.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Imagine 80,000.

[Si]

That was a faith, though.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. We stacked from 9am to 9pm every day for a week. Like 20 of us.

[Willie Robertson]

Real.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Si]

When we finally let it go down, it was. It was perfect. Oh, it really was. It was perfect.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, he did it. So that's. That was. What was that? A little. Did it hurt? Like all that work and then you just bowled through them like.

[Mary Kate]

Oh, yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Like emotionally. Was it pain?

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, it was mixed feelings doing that stack it because it's such a, like, repetitive job. By the end of it, I mean, we were just sick of it. We were like, we don't want to see these cups ever again because, like we start stacking. We were like, oh, this is easy. We did like the first layer. Then we realized that some of the cups are different than the other cups. And so, like, slightly different.

[Si]

Nothing is uniform on any of the things.

[Mary Kate]

They weren't uniform. And so then they started getting off. So then we had to make the layers, like, we call them the green cups and then the yellow cups. And then we got halfway through like 40,000 in, and we realized there was a.

[John Luke]

A.

[Mary Kate]

A mystery third frosted green.

[John Luke]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mary Kate]

That then threw off the thing. So, I mean, as we're going up, the whole thing's wiggling and wobbling and all over the place. We kept having crap. We would knock one down. We'd lose like a thousand.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[Mary Kate]

To stack them back up. We finally got to our. Our mesa.

[Willie Robertson]

It was so exciting, though. Once it was done, it was. It was impressive, I'll say that. And if you haven't watched it yet, you need to, because it actually. I mean, you say 80,000 teacups stacked up. What could it. It actually. Very impressive.

[Mary Kate]

The entire gym. It can't be entire basketball gym. Completely solid of cups.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. And then you just bowled right.

[Mary Kate]

And bowled right through it with that big bubble thing.

[Si]

Yeah. But it. That was the best part.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Si]

It just all started just.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Si]

I don't even know how to describe it, but it was so cool looking. Watch it go.

[Mary Kate]

It was. Yeah. Because it went in like a wave. Like, I thought it was like.

[Si]

Yeah, all of them, but now it kind of just. It started and then it started building and then it started.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. So we hit it in a giant. I was in a giant hamster ball. Like a human sized hamster ball that Sadie got me for my birthday. And so.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, don't ask. All right. Just let that one.

[Si]

Hey, that's just. That's just being in the Robinson family.

[John Luke]

Okay.

[Mary Kate]

So I was in the hamster ball and they like bowled me into it. And I thought, like, part of it would just kind of like crash. But the whole thing went down in like a wave. Like just a. And you can like see it, dad, when he hit, hits it. He just like. It looked like a cartoon. Like, he goes in and just the shape of him was there in the wall. He disappears inside of it and the whole thing crashes down.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. In case you Wonder how many. 80,000. What? They completely hid Willie Robertson because he wasn't in a ball. He was just Willie. Yeah.

[Si]

They were stacked himself on.

[Willie Robertson]

It was like one of them little out. You ever seen them things like, they look like needles and you put your hand into it and it leaves like the perfect shape of your hand. That's what it looked like when Willie hit it. Because I was just sitting there watching. Like, that boy just disappeared.

[Mary Kate]

Oh, well, when I came up from. Because I was, like, floating on top of him in the ball. So when I looked up, no one else was there. Everyone who hit it with me was just gone. I was like, yeah, I'm the last one in the flood. Like, I just survived this thing. This is like. Like, look at this waist.

[Si]

You're kind of riding away.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. And I was white riding on top.

[Si]

Oh, no.

[Willie Robertson]

My favorite.

[Si]

Weird.

[Willie Robertson]

My favorite part. And I don't know if they show. Can't remember if they show this or not, but in the dive, Christian lost his phone. It come out of his pocket. So could you imagine? Hey, look who it is. Hey, look who it is. Get back to work.

[John Luke]

I hate that. I'll never get used to it.

[Willie Robertson]

Every time he's done that to me.

[John Luke]

For a long, long time.

[Willie Robertson]

For 36 years.

[John Luke]

Yes. That's about the. That's the average going on rate, Ladies and gentlemen. Willie. I gotta go to the bathroom. Willie just came in.

[Willie Robertson]

You got tt.

[John Luke]

I feel like I got legitimately scared there. I'm. I'm scared to see what my face looks.

[Willie Robertson]

Unfortunately, you cannot go to the bathroom here right now.

[John Luke]

Oh, God. This build is broke.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, if. Yeah. If you come to duck commander right now, we apologize for any smell you may.

[John Luke]

This place was built on a swamp. So we decided to put a museum and a tour and a bunch of businesses right on top of it. That way, when you take a dump, it'll bubble back up into your.

[Willie Robertson]

That's how it works. That's how it works. It's all on different plumbing. It's the. It's the office side. It's got the issue right now.

[Mary Kate]

The museum side works.

[John Luke]

I used to go to the museum side to take a dump. Anyway.

[Mary Kate]

It's clean, quiet sometimes. Over there.

[John Luke]

What were we talking about? Did Christian ever find his phone?

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, he did. But to see him have to go back in it. And the panic on his face when you're trying to search through. Yeah, I mean, that's not quite a needle in a haystack because he didn't lose a cup in there. But the. The. Him having to go back fishing for that phone and 80,000 cups.

[Mary Kate]

You're swimming in it. But it's painful. They're sharp like the edges of them.

[John Luke]

Cups aren't something you want to swim in.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, man. But it is fun. It's been fun doing the show again. Like, we get to. Me and John Luke get the film Together a lot. Yeah. And sigh.

[Si]

So well, they got a. They got a big choice of people now to, you know.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Because the 20 we had before.

[Si]

Oh, no. Yeah.

[John Luke]

But yeah, now we got 50.

[Mary Kate]

We got to. We got to do the Bigfoot episode because that just came out.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh yeah.

[John Luke]

We were all on that together.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Everybody, your kids, John, Luke.

[John Luke]

I got a lot of questions for you. Oh, you're into that kind of thing, aren't you?

[Mary Kate]

I'm into it. Yeah.

[John Luke]

You're. You're 100% so deep.

[Willie Robertson]

Are you. Are you a believer?

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

You're a Bigfoot believer?

[Mary Kate]

I'm a believer.

[Si]

I am going to tell you I saw him when. When I was a teenager.

[John Luke]

Oh, here we go.

[Si]

I'm serious.

[John Luke]

I know you're serious. I'm not a non believer.

[Si]

It's like the Black Panther. Okay. Just because you don't see it.

[John Luke]

I have seen a black panther.

[Si]

Does not mean it don't exist.

[John Luke]

Agree.

[Willie Robertson]

Hey, this ain't Jesus, son.

[Si]

Hey, I'm just telling you like.

[John Luke]

I'm just saying, they did cut the part where I was like, I'm hopeful.

[Willie Robertson]

But I doubt it on Bigfoot.

[John Luke]

Yeah, yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Ain't there.

[John Luke]

I'm hopeful.

[Willie Robertson]

Ain't there.

[John Luke]

But these two are like, oh well, they're full.

[Willie Robertson]

They're full. And look, I appreciate that the. But he. There's just too much today that if he was there, he would be a lot better.

[John Luke]

Tell him side. Okay, I doubt. No, I disagree.

[Willie Robertson]

What?

[Si]

Instead of like the Robertson, he's anti camera. He don't. Ah, he sees him. He, he.

[Willie Robertson]

The boy can make a lot more money if he just gets.

[Mary Kate]

Hey, he don't need money.

[Willie Robertson]

Why not? The one we had wore tennis shoes.

[Si]

Well, see, they didn't. They.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, Johnny Gobble.

[Si]

They didn't check with the right person since to play. Who's gonna play the Bigfoot?

[Willie Robertson]

Who at Goblin.

[Si]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

He's the perfect person. He's the only mythical figure.

[Si]

When I told him that, hey, what I saw was like 10 to 12 foot tall.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si]

Let me get one. Is at five, six.

[John Luke]

We don't know any 10 to 12 foot tall people.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. And have you ever heard a baby Bigfoot? If there's a big one, like little foot's got to be somewhere.

[Si]

They've seen them too.

[Mary Kate]

Gowan's perfect little Bigfoot size.

[Si]

Well, oh yeah. Well, hey, look, when I was a.

[John Luke]

Teenager, I would call it a troll.

[Si]

About the fourth grade. Hey, one of them was right my size. So there's little ones too.

[John Luke]

There's Little big feet.

[Willie Robertson]

There's little. What do they call little ones? Do we know? Yeah, just like, little feet.

[Mary Kate]

Like, we need a name for them.

[Willie Robertson]

Not Bigfoot yet. Hey, I will say John, Luke, and whoever on the cup stack and whoever ordered the pizza there understood the assignment because every time I'd go out there at night, there was a stack of Johnny. There wasn't six of them. It was. Yeah, it was. They. They should have stacked pizza boxes beside the.

[Si]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

To see which one was taller. By the sounds, I may have got over with.

[John Luke]

I haven't had a pizza for 10 days, and I'm having withdrawals.

[Willie Robertson]

Wow.

[Si]

He's having withdrawals.

[John Luke]

We're going super healthy for 40 days, and we're on day 10, and I'm like. I'm borderline sad.

[Willie Robertson]

Why is pizza not healthy?

[Si]

It's got all that.

[Willie Robertson]

Hey, go. You just go to Johnny's now and get that cauliflower crust that.

[John Luke]

Now that's a. That's a trick play. I don't want to go.

[Si]

That's a trick.

[Willie Robertson]

It's actually not bad.

[Mary Kate]

No, I like the cauliflower crust.

[Willie Robertson]

It's actually not bad.

[Mary Kate]

It's crispier.

[John Luke]

It has more calories than the regular one.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, calories are fine, but it doesn't have all the macros in it. Uh. Oh.

[Mary Kate]

Oh, there she is.

[Si]

There she is. Mary can't slide. Mary was just talking about you.

[John Luke]

Where's your eggs, your bicycle, and your sourdough?

[Si]

That's it.

[Brittany]

At my house.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, we're gonna have to have Mary Kate back, though, to talk about her laundry skills.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, we're talking about the kids clothes.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. How in the world you keep John Shepherd's clothes looking so clean is incredible. Because that boy is dirty. But every time I see him, he starts out clean.

[Mary Kate]

I was telling your anti play clothes. Just all clothes are play clothes.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mary Kate]

So they just dress nice. And how they just. Just dressed nice. And dad calls him smock boy.

[Brittany]

I know. I feel like, though comparison. I was telling Beth this earlier. It was in comparison to Zayn because Zayn and John Shepard were the. The first babies. The first grand babies.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Brittany]

And he was like, little, like rock and roll, baby.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Brittany]

And so anything in comparison was that.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Brittany]

Kind of smock.

[Mary Kate]

Rebecca dresses Zane like punk rock. And then our kids are like, go.

[Willie Robertson]

Ahead, take it back.

[John Luke]

Now she just puts them in a costume every day that I don't know about that.

[Willie Robertson]

And then sales said costume and started a whole business around it.

[Brittany]

I do have to tell y' all, this is the first time I've purposefully walked into this room.

[Willie Robertson]

You love it, don't you?

[Brittany]

I've walked in here three to five times, meaning to go to the bathroom and coming in the wrong door.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, don't do that today. Our bathrooms are shut down. You do not want to end up in the bathroom.

[Mary Kate]

You're in here right now.

[Brittany]

No, Beth wanted me to come.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, I love it. This is. Hey, one big happy family in here today. Man, like, I hate you having to stand up. I wish I had a chair. You could just. Actually, you can have my chair, to be fair. Hey, where are you going?

[John Luke]

I'm leaving.

[Si]

He's leaving. He said he's out.

[Willie Robertson]

That's not nice.

[Si]

He's had enough.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, welcome, Mary Kate. We're just.

[Brittany]

Thanks.

[Willie Robertson]

We got everything here. We had Jacob because John Luke was a little late. Now we got. Wait, what are we doing? What are you doing? What are you doing?

[Si]

All right, he's got to change this camera.

[John Luke]

I'm taking over. Can you hear me, Martin?

[Si]

Hit it on the beauty over here.

[John Luke]

I'm on.

[Si]

We've seen enough of the Beast.

[Willie Robertson]

It feels kind of weird. Why did all the women end up sitting by Psy?

[Brittany]

Hey, he's our favorite.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, mine, too. I get it. That's why I like to look at it.

[Si]

They know I'm armistice.

[Willie Robertson]

I like to make eye contact with.

[Si]

Him, so I know I'm harmless away.

[Willie Robertson]

Well, Mary Kay, do you have any. What's the word I'm looking for here? What's your favorite John? Yeah, what's your favorite John Luke story? Just like y' all been. How long you been together now?

[Brittany]

10 years. Next week.

[Mary Kate]

Next week. 10 years.

[Willie Robertson]

10 years. That's awesome. Congratulations. I just did 10 years.

[Si]

And how old you was when this, you know, first began?

[Mary Kate]

19. We got married.

[Brittany]

19?

[Mary Kate]

Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Unbelievable. Wow. Both of y' all were 19?

[Mary Kate]

Yep. Both of us were 19. Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

That's incredible.

[Mary Kate]

How old are you now, crazy? 29. 29?

[Willie Robertson]

Quick, math says 29, but 19 plus 10, but.

[John Luke]

Shut up. That's why I'm not on camera anymore.

[Willie Robertson]

Don't you work in retail where math is key?

[John Luke]

I was trying to. I never remember how much older I am than John Luke. Okay.

[Si]

He's the only character I. Yeah.

[Brittany]

How much older are you?

[John Luke]

Seven years.

[Willie Robertson]

Seven years.

[John Luke]

Yeah. I'm seven years older than John Luke.

[Brittany]

Okay.

[Willie Robertson]

And that's why you were at all of his things.

[Si]

Oh, you're over.

[John Luke]

There was.

[Willie Robertson]

There was a big gap.

[Si]

You're over the hill then, J.D.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, there was a big Gap between last grandchild and first great grandchild.

[John Luke]

Yeah, that was me.

[Willie Robertson]

Okay.

[John Luke]

And John Luke. And John Luke just got to watch Lion King on VHS over and over and over.

[Willie Robertson]

So you're still mad at him?

[John Luke]

Yeah, I am.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. Because generally the baby's the position you want to be. But. But in your case, no.

[John Luke]

Outshine.

[Mary Kate]

No. And it was. It was the best setup because then we go over John David's house and play all his video games.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah.

[John Luke]

I was a good big cousin.

[Mary Kate]

You were. You had all the cool stuff. And we'd go up in your little. Little loft thing and play.

[Willie Robertson]

There you go. You were the cool, big cousin.

[John Luke]

I really was.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah, still am.

[Brittany]

I did find a bearded dragon in.

[Mary Kate]

Our bathtub last week.

[Willie Robertson]

Okay. There you go. Yeah, that's the one that's back here. Yeah. You took him home to give him a bath. Oh, man. You're a coat of many colors, John Luke and I love it. Gosh. But do you have a favorite night? 10 years together, there's got to be something. Like, it ain't got to be embarrassing. I mean, it can be. That'd be awesome. But, you know, if there's.

[Brittany]

One of my favorite stories was when you had that bike wreck when we were off at school.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, I like this.

[Brittany]

You ever told that story?

[Mary Kate]

No, I haven't. So this is, like, right after we got to. We got to college. There's still, like, the height of Duck Dynasty, and that is a key element in the story. So. So I have an electric bike, and.

[Brittany]

I'm already like, I have my electric.

[Mary Kate]

Just like, your electric bike.

[John Luke]

Big electric bike, people.

[Mary Kate]

Electric bikes.

[Brittany]

John Lee got the first one.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah. And so it was like a mountain bike. So our house was like, you could ride. I could ride the bike to campus, but you. You had to go over this, like, mountain hill, like, this, like, back trail. So I was riding home one day, and the first thing that happened is I was going through the parking lot, and this car, like, backed into me. And I think that was one of the. That started the whole process. Okay. So it kind of messed up the bike, but I was like, oh, I think I'm fine. So I'm going down. And I start going down this hill. And I mean, it's like, it's a steep hill, and probably, like, it's a mountain. It's, like, 200 yards, like, down before I come, like, the other side.

[Si]

Oh, you're picking up speed.

[Mary Kate]

Yeah, I'm picking up speed.

[Willie Robertson]

Gravity's gonna win.

[Brittany]

And it was an electric.

[Mary Kate]

Gravity wins out on this so electric bike, when you, like, pedal, it, like, starts going, and I accidentally, like, hit the button that makes it go really fast. So I am, like. I mean, I am moving down this thing, and then the wheel starts wobbling the back. So I'm, like, totally out of control, and I'm, like, looking down the side of the mountain, like, I'm about to.

[Willie Robertson]

This is a toughie.

[Mary Kate]

This is it. So I hit a rock, and I'm going so fast, I do a total front flip. Flip all the way around and land in a tree.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh.

[Mary Kate]

Like, on the side of the mountain. And then I fall down, like, 15ft.

[Si]

Good.

[Mary Kate]

Down to the thing. So I'm laying there, the bike's on top of me. My AirPods are still playing in my ear.

[Willie Robertson]

What are they playing? Yeah, I hope you remember the song.

[Mary Kate]

Oh. Oh, it was. It was. Oh. NWA action going on.

[John Luke]

I did rub off on them in some ways. I taught Sadie and John Luke rap. That's all I did wrong.

[Mary Kate]

Wrong. Yeah. Huh? Yeah. And that was the worst, because I'm feeling, like, a total bad day. Ride my bike down here, and then I just crash and burn. And so I'm, like, laying there, and I'm like, I can't move. And I'm like, I'm in the middle of nowhere. Like, I'm like. I'm like, my leg is, bro. I can't get my leg. I can't feel my leg. So I, like. I call, like, campus police, and this, like, student worker answers, and she's like, hey, you know, how can I help you? And I'm like. I'm like, oh, I'm playing every card I got. I'm like, that's John Luke, like Robertson from Doug Dynasty. Like, I'm like, my leg. I'm, like, lost on this mountain. My leg's broken. And she's like, sir, have you tried to move your leg? And I was like, hold on, hold on, hold on. And I, like, push the bike off. And I stand up. I'm like, fossil, arm. I'm fine. I was so embarrassed. I just had to drag my bike, like, a mile and a half back to civilization for me. Yeah.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, my goodness. That's so good. He said, I'm playing every card. I'm getting airlifted off this mountain. And they're like, well, stand up.

[Si]

I'm stuck in the top of a tree.

[John Luke]

There were times where you had to play every card you had back.

[Willie Robertson]

Oh, ain't no doubt Wisdom. There's Miss My. Oh, we got to wrap it up. John David you got a verse?

[John Luke]

I got. It's a Bible verse.

[Willie Robertson]

We'll just say, Mary Kate, thank you for. We'll have you back for.

[John Luke]

Thanks for stepping in. I got more questions about you and your little House on the Prairie Electric Bike Edition, life that you're living. And I adore it, by the way. It's one of my favorite things is what I was talking about. All right. This is a verse that I think of when I think of John Luke, because I don't know if y' all know this. John Luke had some pretty tall, mighty men around him growing up, but he's managed to do this verse well. First Timothy 4:12. Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech and conduct and love and faith and impurity. John Luke, proud to know you, buddy. It would have been easy to be a kid in your shoes and fall apart. But you got a rocking family, your little House on the Prairie Electric Bike edition, and we love you. You gotta. We gotta have you back soon.

[Willie Robertson]

Yeah. That was a lot of fun.

[Mary Kate]

That was awesome.

[Willie Robertson]

Thanks for joining us. We'll see you next time. We gotta go film Duck Dynasty. We're out.