Justin Martin’s Twin Boys' Birthday Ends with Chipped Teeth

Summary

Duck Call Room – Episode Summary

Episode: Justin Martin’s Twin Boys' Birthday Ends with Chipped Teeth
Air Date: October 21, 2025
Hosts: Si Robertson & Justin Martin
Guests/Regulars: John-David Owen, John Godwin, Jay Stone, Phillip McMillan, Jacob Mayo

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Overview

This episode of Duck Call Room is a classic blend of Southern storytelling, hunting tales, offbeat facts, and family hijinks. The crew recaps adventures from hunting trips in Canada and local butcher shops, celebrates Justin Martin’s twins' birthday, and goes on hilarious tangents about giant pigs, ostrich farms, bizarre Australian creatures, and the mysteries of platypus milk. It’s an episode filled with laughs, fun facts, and a dose of wholesome family chaos.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Canadian Duck Hunting Trips

[01:04 - 06:45]

• Justin Martin and others just returned from hunting trips in Canada, discussing experiences with Canadian ducks, cold weather, and memorable food exchanges using Willie Robertson’s autograph.
• Si shares: “I traded an autograph of Willie for two racks of ribs and three large portions of poutine.” (04:14)
• The group swaps stories about previous Canadian visits, hunting with family, and enjoying traditions passed down through generations.

2. Butchers, Duck Sausage, and Local Color

[07:25 - 13:40]

• Extended banter about the cleanliness of local processors (“Bayou Butchers”) and the merits of various sausage types—duck, deer, and more.
• Notable for Martin’s description: “That is the cleanest processing place I have ever been inside of.” (09:21)
• Jokes about photo-ops, antlers, and sharing game with community food banks.

3. Family, Conservation, and Duck Stamps

[13:41 - 16:30, 24:02 - 25:14]

• Reminder to hunters about legalities, emphasizing buying a federal duck stamp for conservation.
• Martin: “At the end of the day, it’s not just about shooting ducks. It’s about taking care of the places that they live so that they'll still be here for our next generation...”
• The segment shifts towards conservation efforts and the importance of protecting duck habitats for the future.

4. Hog and Bear Encounters

[16:31 - 20:13]

• The group shares wild stories about massive feral hogs, black bears, and the difficulties distinguishing between hogs and bears while hunting.
• “I got one boar... I thought he was a black bear the first time I saw him. All I had was a 28 gauge with me—this ain't enough, boys.” (17:09, Martin)
• Si tells of a friend killing a thousand-pound Russian boar, remarking on the absurdity and toughness of such beasts.

5. Legendary Animals: Hogzilla, Ancient Pigs & Unknowable Mysteries

[20:13 - 26:32]

• Curiosity about legendary pigs (“Hogzilla”), debates over measuring ancient animals versus dinosaurs, and a lighthearted critique of scientific estimates.
• “I like how we can't figure out how big a pig was in 2005, but we know some dinosaur was 2.4 billion years old.” (21:14, Si)
• The group jokes about “SWAG” (Super Wild-A-- Guess) approaches to science.

6. Platypus Science (and Milk!)

[28:00 - 34:14]

• Extended, riotous digression about the weirdness of platypuses—where they live, their venom, and, most memorably: how they sweat milk to feed their young.
• Memorable moment: “You telling me this was just by chance?... That is the wildest thing I have ever…” (31:14, Si)
• Laughter about what you’d call a group of platypuses (“a puddle” or “a paddle”), and the idea of bringing one home as an exotic pet: “If I could walk in here with a duck bill platypus on a leash, that would... That would be cool.” (28:26, Martin)

7. Australian Curiosities: Emu Wars, Ostriches & Outback Facts

[37:40 - 44:48]

• The group cracks up over the “Emu War” in Australia, in which humans reportedly lost to birds—twice.
• Si: “The good folks of Australia lost a war against birds.”
• Martin: "I've never been more proud to not be Australian than right now... you lost to some birds. The rest of the world was fighting a world war."
• Stories surface about ostrich farms in the family, ostrich eggs, and how dangerous, fast, and strong ostriches can be.

8. Justin’s Twin Boys Turn Three: The Chipped Tooth Incident

[47:02 - 50:59]

• The hosts mark the third birthday of Martin’s twin boys, recalling the busy, blurry first three years of parenting twins.
• Martin recounts at the pumpkin patch: “Jackson chipped a tooth this weekend... bumped heads with another one... we got a piece of a tooth missing. The whole tooth will leave at some point, so it's not that big of a deal. He was fine. He cried for just a hot minute and then... let's go do this. And he was gone and all was well with the world…” (50:08–50:41)
• The group teases Martin about a listener’s dream that he’ll end up with another set of twins. Martin is not eager: “I don’t want to go back to those first 18 months, man.”

9. Listener Mailbag: Weird Pets & Robin Hood Cartoons

[52:25 - 53:44]

• A listener writes about her pet snake, Sid, who wears a sombrero.
• The conversation diverts to recalling the animated “Robin Hood” with its memorable animal characters, culminating with the “drunk snake” scene.

10. Closing Reflections and Bible Verse

[53:50 - 54:08]

• Si brings the episode to a close with a simple message:
  • “Psalm 34:14. Turn from evil and do good. Seek peace and pursue it.”
• Martin makes one last platypus quip: “The most peaceful thing I know, sleep—a duck bill platypus.”

---

Notable Quotes

• Si (on platypus milk): “You telling me this was just by chance?... That is the wildest thing I have ever…” (31:14)
• Martin (on kids): “I don’t want to go back to those first 18 months, man. I don’t.” (49:47)
• Martin (on processing plants): “That is the cleanest processing place I have ever been inside of.” (09:21)
• Martin (on conservation): “It’s not just about shooting ducks. It’s about taking care of the places that they live so that they'll still be here for our next generation.” (24:02)
• Si (on legendary pigs versus dinosaurs): "I like how we can't figure out how big a pig was in 2005, but we know some dinosaur was 2.4 billion years old.” (21:14)

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:04 – Return from Canada, duck stamp talk
• 04:14 – Si’s poutine-for-autograph trade
• 09:21 – Martin on Bayou Butchers
• 13:41 – Conservation & duck stamps
• 17:09 – Martin’s hog-vs-bear encounter
• 21:14 – Measuring legendary pigs vs. dinosaurs
• 28:26 – Desire for a pet platypus
• 31:14 – Platypus “sweats milk” revelation
• 37:54 – The Emu War and Australian hijinks
• 47:02 – Martin’s twins’ birthday and “the chipped tooth”
• 50:08–50:41 – Birthday pumpkin patch, tooth story
• 53:50 – Listener pets and cartoon nostalgia
• 54:01 – Closing Bible verse

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Memorable Moments

• The entire platypus milk segment (29:50–34:10) is pure Duck Call Room gold, mixing disbelief, education, and endless laughter over nature’s oddities.
• The Emu War recounting, complete with boasts of how the crew would’ve succeeded where the Aussies failed, showcases the show’s signature blend of bravado and joking humility.
• Si’s negotiation of poutine and ribs in Canada using autographs (04:14) highlights the crew’s “Southern hustle.”

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Tone and Style

Rolling storytelling, enthusiastic “did you know?” asides, Southern warmth, camaraderie, and a love for family, wildlife, and American traditions. The crew’s tone is equal parts ribbing, wisecracking, and genuine—listeners feel like part of the hunt camp, privy to both family milestones and absurd animal trivia.

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For New Listeners

This episode is a perfect sampler: you get duck hunting wisdom, small-town nostalgia, family milestones, and plenty of weird (but educational) animal facts. If you want laughs, learning, and the feeling of hanging with old friends at a hunting lodge, this one’s for you.

---

Transcript

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[Guest or Co-host 1]

Foreign.

[Martin (Host)]

Just got back from Canada, so we'll get that.

[Co-host Size]

Need a federal duck stamp in Canada.

[Martin (Host)]

That don't matter. You need one here.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

What did you do in Canada? Shot ducks.

[Martin (Host)]

All right, welcome back to the shot in Canada. And we're back. Yeah. Welcome back to the duck call room, ladies and gentlemen.

[Co-host Size]

Are Canadian ducks nicer than American ducks?

[Martin (Host)]

I don't know. I don't know if they're definitely dumber.

[Co-host Hunter]

I'm gonna say. I don't know if I can speak on their emotional beans.

[Martin (Host)]

Would you have a good trip?

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah, it was fun.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. Is that your first time to. To the great north, the Beth's homeland? Oh, yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

It was my second time. Second time for hunting. Second time for hunting.

[Martin (Host)]

Okay. Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

How was there before?

[Co-host Hunter]

It was good.

[Martin (Host)]

Good do.

[Co-host Size]

What did you go there before for something else?

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

You just visit Canada.

[Co-host Hunter]

Off I went with Willie.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Wow.

[Co-host Hunter]

You know how that goes. I think all of us have been places with Willie.

[Co-host Size]

I've been to Canada with Willie. The only time I ever left the country to go north, first time I.

[Co-host Hunter]

Was ever in Canada was with Willie.

[Martin (Host)]

How'd that go?

[Co-host Hunter]

That was one of the coolest things.

[Martin (Host)]

I probably ever did. Oh, there you go.

[Co-host Hunter]

Just like the place I went to.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, sometimes you never know because sometimes he'll just go lock himself in a hotel room and you don't see him till you leave Canada. That is true.

[Co-host Hunter]

Seen that when me and Willie were.

[Co-host Size]

In Canada, I traded an autograph of Willie for two racks of ribs and three large portions of poutine.

[Martin (Host)]

Poutine.

[Co-host Size]

And he was like, where did you get all that? I said, don't worry about it.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, big deal.

[Co-host Hunter]

Did you have like A stash of autograph things to do that?

[Co-host Size]

No, I just walk up to him and say, sign this, and then I'd come back with food.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

Great.

[Co-host Size]

Is also a food truck with Willie Robertson and your presence. You can. You can make things happen.

[Martin (Host)]

There you go.

[Co-host Size]

That's good ribs, too.

[Martin (Host)]

So how many? What would you say? I'm just curious. A preview of our duck season based off of what you saw in Canada.

[Co-host Hunter]

What do you mean? A preview of, like, how it's going to go down here.

[Martin (Host)]

Was there a bunch of young ones? Was there a lot of babies? Were there? Not so many. Was it? You know, I think we hit it.

[Co-host Hunter]

As a weird time. I think a lot more people south of us, like, an hour or so, like, got the ducks that pushed down to us a week earlier.

[Martin (Host)]

Okay.

[Co-host Hunter]

So I would say, yeah, I know a lot of people that were smashing them down south.

[Martin (Host)]

Okay.

[Co-host Hunter]

We missed a cold front by, like, a week. Then I think a cold front came through there the week before we got there.

[Martin (Host)]

There you go.

[Co-host Hunter]

But there's a lot of ducks up there, so it's kind of hard to.

[Co-host Size]

Is it Canada? Just one big cold front.

[Co-host Hunter]

It was like 40. I'm just saying it was 40 degrees when we were there.

[Co-host Size]

Oh, no. I'm out. Leave me here.

[Co-host Hunter]

That's cold.

[Co-host Size]

Oh, yeah. I want to shoot the ducks that are in Jamaica here in a few months. I've seen the movie Migration. That's where they're headed, according to Dreamworks Pixar.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, man. If you want to shoot ducks here, make sure you got your duck stamp. Head over to Duck stamp dot com. Get that done. That way you're not that guy on Opening More or Gal.

[Co-host Size]

You need a duck stamp here.

[Martin (Host)]

You need a duck stamp here in America. So get it. Take care of all the legalities and get back to it and help preserve.

[Co-host Size]

The ducks for future.

[Martin (Host)]

Do you kill anything cool up there, like cranes or geese or nothing? Just standard duck hunt.

[Co-host Hunter]

Just standard duck hunt. Nothing crazy.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, man.

[Co-host Hunter]

But it was fun. Like, I went with my Grandpa, and he's 82.

[Martin (Host)]

That's good.

[Co-host Hunter]

It's my brothers, my dad, my grandpa, and my cousin.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh. So family trip?

[Co-host Hunter]

It was family.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, that's awesome.

[Co-host Hunter]

It was awesome. I just have my grandpa up there. He the one that taught me how to hunt. Like, took me to kill my first deer.

[Martin (Host)]

So it's like, what'd he think about? Was that his first time to Canada?

[Co-host Hunter]

No, he's been deer hunting up there. Never duck hunting, because he. He's one of those guys that said, I never had to go anywhere to shoot ducks. They were already here. Like when he used to kill him.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, boy. Ain't them days changed?

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah, it has. It's a lot different. He used to hunt a lot of Beth river back in the day.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah, I still do.

[Co-host Size]

Sigh. You excited for duck season? I was waiting for size. First lines of this podcast.

[Martin (Host)]

Have you been to Canada? Have you been to Canada?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I've been to Canada, but not hunting. Not hunting.

[Martin (Host)]

Not hunting.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, I went up there with one Billy Graham. What's Bill Graham's son?

[Co-host Size]

Franklin.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Franklin?

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

Jimmy.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

No, Franklin.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, no, he's football player.

[Co-host Size]

Talk about a name drop. Oh, you know my good buddy Billy.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Graham's son, we actually watched of veterans come in on a plane.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's all really cool.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. And ended up catching a bunch of salmon and all that kind of.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, yeah, Watch the bears catch the salmon. Yeah, I didn't catch any salmon. I watched them catch.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, you watch them fish?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

You don't want to get between a Canadian bear in their dinner.

[Martin (Host)]

I don't want to get between a Louisiana bear and his dinner, much less a Canadian one.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, you talk about that. It's open now, right? They got a bear season.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. You can draw for it. Yeah. Lottery draw for it. Here.

[Co-host Size]

25 human beings in the state of Louisiana can go shoot a black bear.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I wouldn't care to, you know.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. Me and them ain't got no problems with each other.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

Bear skin rug. Not my thing.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah. Hold on.

[Martin (Host)]

What?

[Co-host Size]

Of all the things you would do with a bear, a bear skin rug is the coolest.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, but I'm so hot natured. I'm not gonna go cuddle up by the fire on a big rug, like. And it's also Louisiana, so, like, if.

[Co-host Size]

I got one, I'd make one of those hoodies like the Lost Boys did and Peter Pan.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

And put the bare head on top of my head.

[Martin (Host)]

And then you'd be straight out of Jeremiah Johnson too.

[Co-host Size]

That'd be so cool.

[Co-host Hunter]

Halloween's coming up.

[Martin (Host)]

You know how hot you would be in that thing?

[Co-host Size]

I would sweat through it.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Very, very good tasting. Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

It's just a giant.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

It's got a stout, strong flavor.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. I mean, I've, I've looked at him and I don't, I don't, I don't get inspired by table fare. When I see him, I'm like, I mean, I, you know, kind of.

[Co-host Size]

It's like purple, isn't it?

[Martin (Host)]

I hear. I don't know, I never. I've never shot one.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

It's just stout.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. He just doesn't look like something I want to eat.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, I had a guy that Arkansas. He went all over the world killing stuff.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

We had caribou, we had bear. What else do we have?

[Martin (Host)]

I just had a buddy killed a caribou.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

So pretty good.

[Martin (Host)]

Really?

[Co-host Hunter]

Kill one?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, he killed two of them.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah. Bamboo's pretty good. Eat.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

I don't know about no bear.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

The bear is real stout. It's like alligator to me, you know, it ain't no good.

[Co-host Hunter]

It's good. I like it.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, it's stout. It's stout, too.

[Co-host Hunter]

Hey, frogs are good, too.

[Martin (Host)]

I got something I cook for you. I went to the local processor this morning and he gave me some duck sausage to try.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, no, I had some of that.

[Co-host Hunter]

That's good.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, Horrid. I have that.

[Co-host Size]

I'm so glad you've told us now.

[Martin (Host)]

Hey, what, me?

[Co-host Size]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

At the processor?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Do you know that everybody knows you're at the processor this morning?

[Martin (Host)]

Well, they took a picture with me. The women did.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, yeah. I remember where it was now. It was Honey Break.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

There I am.

[Martin (Host)]

That's what the women are by you butchers, baby.

[Co-host Size]

But can we talk about the perfect placement of your head and their logo so antlers.

[Martin (Host)]

That's why that cat moved me. I didn't even realize that I got to.

[Co-host Size]

Even the top comment was perfect placement with. I got to laughing at the honey hole.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

I said, martin's at the butcher.

[Martin (Host)]

Hey, look, here's my sausage in my hand.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

He looked like the devil. Boy.

[Co-host Size]

Martin's just a young.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, I'd be got, son. If I was a deer, I'd have been dead. What are you talking about? I'd have never made it.

[Co-host Size]

You're a foot taller than everybody in.

[Martin (Host)]

The photo, at least.

[Co-host Size]

And you've got horns. And I got a good laugh out.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

They had. They had deer. Deer beef, meatballs, small ones.

[Martin (Host)]

Okay.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

You know, and I didn't care for that. But the deer sausage. The duck sausage. The duck sausage was excellent.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, I got. He gave me that this morning, so I'm. I'm letting it thaw out right now. I'll eat it.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

No, that's good.

[Co-host Hunter]

I've had some. It's good.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

It's good.

[Martin (Host)]

The. No, it was. I'll say this for bayou butchers, and this is not a ringing endorsement of them. I mean, it obviously went there. I do think they produce good work that I've been In a. I don't know how many different processing places through my career. Like when you, you shoot deer when you're out of state, you take them to process or donate them to. A lot of times you pay for them to be processed and then donate them to like local food bank and stuff because they're just inherently hard to travel back with. Yeah. So it's our. Yeah, it's our way. It's our way to give back to communities when we go places and hunt animals and all that stuff. That is the cleanest place I have ever been inside of. Really?

[Co-host Size]

I thought you were about to not give them a ringing endorsement.

[Martin (Host)]

No, I'm just saying. What I'm saying is like they, they don't partner with a duck call room. They don't sponsor me or nothing like that. But what I'm telling you is I went in there and got the grand tour of the place that is the cleanest processing place I have ever been in. I mean, it was incredible how clean it was and it didn't smell like most processing places have a very distinct aroma.

[Co-host Size]

Yeah, I like, I go to the one sometimes in Rocky Branch.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah, the drive thru deer process.

[Co-host Size]

That one's got a smell.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. By the time you make.

[Co-host Size]

I walked in there and I was like, I want to ask you how you're eating McDonald's in this room right now.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

But people say the same thing about me Next to all those worms.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, last night. Yeah. Last time I went in that place, that lady was sitting there with a plate of fried chicken and I said, how are you eating lunch inside of here? I mean, the smell was just.

[Co-host Size]

I was like, it's a smell of a butcher shop. Yeah, we got a lot of good ones here.

[Martin (Host)]

But that place right there, man, is.

[Co-host Size]

And they got a photo op and you get just beautiful things. Like, I don't know, this kid. Never met this kid. Kid, if you're watching. Great haircut, man.

[Martin (Host)]

Great haircut and great deer. Next time maybe put her tongue back in her mouth.

[Co-host Size]

That's all right.

[Martin (Host)]

The tongues are always a weird part for me. I'll generally. If I'm about to take a picture of one, I cut the tongue.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah, I did that.

[Martin (Host)]

Just so it ain't there. But no, that was, it was super clean. So I'm looking forward to it. My buddy's son shot a doe and a little buck this weekend, so I dropped it off for them. They. They were, they were going to be indisposed and asked if I could do it. So I took it up there and dropped it off.

[Co-host Hunter]

That's awesome.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

There's nothing like a good butcher. Oh, dear. Processor.

[Martin (Host)]

And I. This guy. So this guy did a crawfish bowl for us when Kevin Van Dam was in town fishing the kvd. Yeah. And so that's where I really learned about him was he brought some duck boudin that he made and threw in the crawfish bowl. And that stuff was so good. I said, oh, I'm gonna hit y' all up come. Come the fall. Like, once. Once we get to shooting some things, I'm going to let y' all do some work for me. So that's where. That's why I said it's not. I have. I don't know. Right. Like, is my first time I've ever given them any of my business. Y' all have heard us talk about it on the podcast before. West Monroe, Monday.

[Co-host Size]

Water struggles surrounding areas. We're at the bottom of the river.

[Martin (Host)]

We're at the bottom of the hill for sure. So all you folks north of us that throw you crap in the water, it ends up down here.

[Co-host Size]

And we drinking it.

[Martin (Host)]

And we drink it because we're tough, right? Like, I mean, we're just. I know people got to have water.

[Co-host Size]

That will not even cook with the water here. Sometimes your bathtub's a little brown. You never know what's in the water.

[Martin (Host)]

So you want to take the color out of your water. Won't take all the other undesirables out. We got something for you, man. The COVID Pure water purifier helps keep your family safe. But unlike the government, which is shut down right now, the COVID Pure actually does its job. It never shuts down, Right.

[Co-host Size]

It just keeps on going. Watch this.

[Martin (Host)]

It's working.

[Co-host Size]

Jacob, fix yourself a glass of water.

[Martin (Host)]

Watch how easy this is. Boom. They could push one button. I heard abeap, and now he's got a glass of water.

[Co-host Size]

You get to pick the temperature of which your water is.

[Martin (Host)]

That doesn't look like it's run through an old coffee filter.

[Co-host Size]

That is great.

[Martin (Host)]

That's about the best way to describe West Monroe's water. It looks like it's run through a used coffee filter. Cove Pure is the obvious fix. Their Clearwave technology removes up to 99.9% of contaminants. Lead, PFAS, pharmaceuticals, you name it. Round up all the things, right? Like, everything that gets dumped in our water.

[Co-host Size]

Look at, look at.

[Martin (Host)]

There it is.

[Co-host Size]

Jacob's just got himself a just. That is the clearest water I've seen.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

In A long time.

[Martin (Host)]

It is. And the cool part is there's no need to call a plumber, drill any holes. You just plug it into your countertop, set the temperature you want with a touchscreen, and it actually tastes like water. Which means it should taste like nothing, right?

[Co-host Size]

Yeah, it's just water.

[Martin (Host)]

Water with taste is a problem. Look, if you want to take back control of your family's health and finally drink water the way it was meant to be, go to covepure.com duck, he's drinking water. Oh, that's not good.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

He can't stop trying to finish it off. Boys.

[Martin (Host)]

There you go. So go to covpure.com right now and get 200 off while supplies last. That's C O V E p u r e.com to get 200 off covepure.com you ready to go to Wisconsin? Me and Sigh and God wouldn't leave tomorrow morning to go to Wisconsin.

[Co-host Size]

No, we just got this one today and then we got like a week off. Because y' all are world traveling dollars.

[Martin (Host)]

Heck yeah, man. We get to go where the. Hey, weather's gonna be nice. High is like 60.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's. That's a good event up there.

[Martin (Host)]

It is, man. They do a lot of. They do a lot of good things.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

What is it?

[Martin (Host)]

Life Camp usa They got like four different entities but it's a major fundraiser for the one they call Life Camp usa which is where they take children fallen service members. So whether it is army all the way to local law enforcement, first responders. If your child is lost in the line of duty, you can they. They apply for them and then they take them out for like a week of man camp. Or if it's a young lady who then they. And they lost their mother. So they. They cater it to who where they're. The kids are dealing with the same kind of deals. Yeah. And yeah. Share the gospel with them. They are very faith forward and so me sign God one for the third. This is our third time there's our second year in a row but I think it's third time there are going up for their auction and fundraiser and pheasant hunt.

[Co-host Size]

So are they auctioning off?

[Martin (Host)]

Sigh I hope so.

[Co-host Size]

I think like time with him not you don't get to keep.

[Martin (Host)]

Not for the right price. You probably keep him. You don't mind, do you?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

All you got to do promise to return me to my wife. There you go.

[Co-host Size]

Return to cinder.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah boys.

[Martin (Host)]

At least every so often, huh?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Well we like him here at least twice a week. You haven't hunted any yet this year, huh? The stone have you unpicked out?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Well, no, we went down for dove at Honey Break. That, you know, we've the whole bunch kill like over 200. So it was a good doe hunt.

[Co-host Hunter]

Then you went to hunting down there, right?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

And I went to hunt and it was. We killed six one day, and then I was sick, so I. I told Stone, y' all go where I'm out.

[Co-host Size]

Yeah, but.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

And I laid up.

[Co-host Size]

But now that you've turned into a deer hunter in your and your prime.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Here, I'm looking forward to hunting this year. We got a lot of nice deer that needs to be shot.

[Co-host Size]

Taken down.

[Co-host Hunter]

Does he have one named for you yet?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, no, we got one we after.

[Co-host Hunter]

What's his name?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Big Red.

[Martin (Host)]

Big Red.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Like, I gotta. I gotta get him before. I gotta get him a full BK or Sage.

[Co-host Hunter]

Good luck if. Yeah, if that's the case, you're out of luck.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah. No, no, I'm just gonna let you know.

[Co-host Size]

They have their deer tags.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, no hugging.

[Co-host Size]

BK and Sage both. They're ready.

[Martin (Host)]

They got plenty of tags. Yep.

[Co-host Size]

They've got them printed and are ready to roll.

[Martin (Host)]

I ain't sat in a deer stand yet either. I'm about. The stupid hogs are what's driving me.

[Co-host Hunter]

Crazy, but I'm ready for y'.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

All. Got a lot of them on clays.

[Martin (Host)]

They always do like this. When the farmers first cut all the fields, they show up for a. For a hot minute, free meal. Yeah, for a free meal. It runs them out of the fields and runs them on to us and then. But they'll. They'll move on here eventually. But, yeah, for right now, you're just trying to feed deer, but you're feeding pigs. This is pretty aggravating, but, you know.

[Co-host Size]

Whatever you got to see Tombo.

[Co-host Hunter]

Tombo killed a 400 pound one in Allah.

[Co-host Size]

400 pound pig?

[Co-host Hunter]

Yes.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah, I got one about that side. I got one boar that's probably. I thought he was there the first time I saw him. Like, I thought he was a bear. I thought he was a black bear the first time I saw him. And all I had was a 28 gauge with me. Oh, I was like, this ain't enough, boys. This ain't enough.

[Co-host Hunter]

Two, four, stack load.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Three bear.

[Co-host Size]

You saw three bears?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, a mama and two cups.

[Co-host Size]

Get out of there.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I thought it was hog at first, and then when he got talking about it, I said, no. I said, wait a minute and go. And Drew said, well, we got them both hogs and bear.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

And I said, well, there was something funny about the way they was running.

[Martin (Host)]

What is it with you and black animals? They follow you, don't they?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Well, I just looked and I looked over and I said, yeah, there goes three pigs. And then when they got to talking, I said, whoop. Let's back up once more. They ain't pig. I knew there was something wrong about the way they was running.

[Martin (Host)]

You sure it wasn't a panther with babies?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

No, no. This was too. This was a mama bear.

[Co-host Size]

You can tell a difference between a panther and a. Come on.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

But it was cool to see him. Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

Not a hog and a bear.

[Co-host Size]

A hog and a bear. Hey, there's they.

[Co-host Hunter]

Hey.

[Martin (Host)]

From a distance, they do.

[Co-host Size]

I'll never get that time I was driving down Arkansas Road and that bear stood up and looked at me and I said, what was that?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Buddy of mine, okay. In Germany. Okay. He went to Russia. Oh, and shot him one. In short, enough wild boars.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, one of the. I thought we were going with a big old grizzly.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Guy is about 6, 8.

[Martin (Host)]

Probably.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

425.

[Martin (Host)]

You ever met anybody like 5, 10?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, a few people.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Everybody saw me. Anyway, Goliath himself.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Hey, look, this guy. I thought he was on his knees.

[Co-host Size]

6, 8, 4, 2, 5.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Hey. 6, 8, 4, 25. Look at no fat. But anyway, I thought he was on his knees and I said, jake, you on your knees. He said, no, I'm standing up, son. He killed one. And look, the thing weighed a thousand pounds.

[Martin (Host)]

Russian boar.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah. And look, he shot him five times with a.308. And, you know, about the size of that bale. Okay, they trailed him for, like, you know, seven miles. He finally died. But this thing you talking about, how.

[Co-host Size]

Big was it, huh?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

A thousand pounds.

[Co-host Hunter]

A thousand pounds.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

He was humongous. Yeah, look.

[Co-host Hunter]

And Goliath's brothers.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, no. His chocolate.

[Martin (Host)]

I got a little buyer's remorse. I just bought a 308. I mean, this past weekend, y'.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

All. This thing, this thing was unreal.

[Co-host Hunter]

I wish we had a picture of that. Was it?

[Martin (Host)]

Well, you could, but it doesn't.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Look, he reminded me when I was a teenager, would go to the state fair and they'd have them big hogs in there that would be like lumbering that table and weighed like a thousand pounds. That's what that. That's what that picture reminded me of.

[Co-host Size]

Best friend was a spider.

[Co-host Hunter]

Made me think of Charlotte's whale.

[Co-host Size]

Hold on, Wilbur.

[Martin (Host)]

Look at this.

[Co-host Size]

Hey, if you go to Hogzilla on.

[Martin (Host)]

Wikipedia, that's a big one.

[Co-host Size]

That one weighed over a thousand pounds.

[Martin (Host)]

That's a big one.

[Co-host Hunter]

I think they're about to put his corpse in that hole.

[Martin (Host)]

That's a big.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's a big pig right there, buddy.

[Martin (Host)]

That's a big one.

[Co-host Size]

Yeah, that one was.

[Martin (Host)]

That's a great big.

[Co-host Size]

That one was alleged. Why has it got to be a legend?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

We have a photograph right here. Wikipedia.

[Co-host Hunter]

Oh, how much?

[Co-host Size]

It weighed 12ft long and weighed over a thousand pounds.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Size.

[Martin (Host)]

Imagine.

[Co-host Size]

It was also originally considered a hoax or urban legend until. But the animals remains were exhumed.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, we pulled the corpse out in early 2000. Okay.

[Co-host Size]

And we gotta stop. I'm gonna have to tell the corpse story. So. Okay, yeah, we're telling that next. In March 2005, they confirmed that he actually weighed 800 pounds and was 7 to 8. How do you get his corpse and not know that he's. How long he was.

[Martin (Host)]

Can't you just measure that dinosaur, put him back together.

[Co-host Size]

I like how we can't figure out how big a pig was in 2005, but we know that some dinosaur was 2.4 billion years.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, there we go.

[Co-host Size]

Come on now, science community. I'm calling a little question because we don't.

[Co-host Hunter]

Hey, McGraw Hill was lying. You remember that book, that science book?

[Martin (Host)]

As a trained scientist, I always had an issue with stuff being around 300 million years.

[Co-host Size]

And they're like, oh, it was, you know. Yeah, it was this weight and had purple eyes. And I'm like.

[Martin (Host)]

And the older.

[Co-host Size]

But the pig that died when I was 18 was somewhere between 7 and 12ft. And we don't know know. Even though we dug it up.

[Martin (Host)]

Even though we exhumed him.

[Co-host Size]

We exhumed him also. We might have to exhume Dublin is why we're all laughing.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I know two gentlemen that researched a lot of stuff in the Bible and all these scientists just talking about 14 billion years ago.

[Martin (Host)]

I just think there's some things that are unknowable.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, I'm with you on that.

[Martin (Host)]

Like they're just. I mean, maybe. Right. Maybe it was 14 million years ago.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Well, here's the thing.

[Martin (Host)]

But I just. I don't know how you with any certainty, maybe God and.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, why don't you just tell me the truth? Okay. You're an educated man and you made a guess.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, we used to call it a swag.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Super wild guess you just said.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Well, here's what I think.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

You know, because I know some people that studied the Bible and trace from Adam to Jesus.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

And, hey, why would God put all these people's names in there and then actually say, this cat lived 1200 years, this man lived 800 years.

[Martin (Host)]

Which, by the way, is that not wild to think about? Imagine if, like, that were still a thing. No, I mean, we would still be. We would all, including Silas, would all be children.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Do you know how many? Yeah, no, I'd be. That's too much.

[Martin (Host)]

That's what I'm saying.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Like, we're not making. Is okay. Hey, God put it in his word specific years that these people lived. Okay? And two people that I know of that spent a lot of time and research doing it, and they come up with, hey, the math don't lie. Numbers do not lie. They come up with, hey, this earth is about 7,500 years old.

[Martin (Host)]

Look, obviously, we love ducks and we love duck hunting, but at the end of the day, it's not just about shooting ducks. It's about taking care of the places that they live so that they'll still be here for our next generation, for our kids, for their kids, for everybody's kids. Right. And if you want to do that, the easiest way to do that is to buy a federal duck stamp. Like, you know, there's 25 bucks, 24. Something goes straight back to the. To the resource. So it's our way of taking care of the resource that provides so much for us as a company. And just as tradition, right, where you take care of the ducks, they take care of you. Like, if you want ducks to actually land where you hunt in, a federal duck stamp is part of the deal. That money goes straight into conserving wetlands so the birds have a place to go. Doesn't matter if you're in the timber, the fields, marsh, anywhere you can hunt them. A duck stamp helps protect all of it. We like to do our part for conservation for our lands, and we're glad that it's a priority for Uncle Sam, just like it's a priority for Uncle Sa.

[Co-host Size]

Uncle Sa rules.

[Martin (Host)]

That's what I'm talking about. Look, we're not just hunting this season or next. We're trying to make sure that our kids and grandkids have a legacy to live by. Look, buying a duck stamp helps keep that alive. I. I mean, it won't be long, and I'll be buying my kids duck stamps. This is.

[Co-host Size]

Then you're going to be hunting with your grandkids next.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, let's not. Let's not speed. Let's not speed up time. Hopefully, you've got grandkids before I do. But regardless, we can rest easy because there's a digital duck stamp, and it makes it super easy. You don't have to worry about having a paper one anymore. You've got the digital stamp from our friends [e-mail] digital stamps. Old school hunts. That's how we do [e-mail]. that's duckstamp.com. is that your beard on your microphone? Is that what I'm hearing? Do you hear it?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Who knows?

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah, that's. I can't confirm that's what I'm hearing.

[Co-host Size]

That was size beard. I literally tried to do it, and no noise came out. And then size shook his head.

[Martin (Host)]

No, I was just trying to figure out what this weird rustling was.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I was like, rustling.

[Martin (Host)]

What is. Is that a dinosaur about to come out the ground? I didn't know what the weird rustling. I was trying to. I tried to figure it out, but no, I mean, there's just some things that are unknowable. Why?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Who was the politician that said that? The guy used to say, hey, there are some things that are noble, and then there's some other things.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That you'll never know.

[Martin (Host)]

There's things that are known, There are things that are unknown, but then there's also things that are unknowable.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

Or something like that.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

That is a deep quote.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Google.

[Co-host Size]

It was Walt Whitman and I have no idea.

[Martin (Host)]

I don't. Jace used to quote it all the time. I don't remember.

[Co-host Size]

I mean. Good night. Some things you just can't figure out.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. I mean, but what is. Yeah. I just don't. I always struggled with the 300 million years ago. I'm like, man, that, that, that, that. Just stop. Like, there's no way with any degree.

[Co-host Size]

Of what happened five years ago.

[Martin (Host)]

I know. And now we can't even count a ballot. So, like, you're telling me that we can go back and count that? Like. I'm just saying. I got a big trust issue when it comes to humans.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Well, I think the carbon dating.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

They went through this, and then the guy said, well, hold it. You got it now. That won't. That won't fly.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, unfortunately, I had to pass test on all that stuff because he. He went, that's out, Yo.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Bomb, Bomb, bomb. Then somebody finally, finally. You're going to run out of carbon 13.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

You know. Well, then, wait a minute. That makes your. Your guess a guess. I guess a guess is flawed.

[Martin (Host)]

A true.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah, it's flawed scientific theory.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, hey, why not you could. We found out they've been lying to us for years.

[Martin (Host)]

Who's they?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

The scientists.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh.

[Co-host Hunter]

Oh, Bill Nye. I knew it was you, Bill.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Now, they gave us. They gave us a gift and hey, you know. Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

They did the best they could with the information they had at the time. But at the same time, well, what.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Tickles me is one little animal threw everything out of. Out of. Out of whack.

[Martin (Host)]

That sheep.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

And that's the duck Bill Platypus.

[Martin (Host)]

Doug Bill. He's talking about Dolly.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

No, wasn't that the sheep's name?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

He can. Hey, it was Dolly. He can breathe air and he can also breathe in water and he lays.

[Co-host Size]

Eggs and he has a beak and.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

When they came upon it.

[Co-host Size]

Or is it a Bill now?

[Martin (Host)]

Talk about an exotic pet. That would be cool to have.

[Co-host Size]

I would take that to the vet.

[Martin (Host)]

A duck Bill Platypus. If I could walk in here with a duck Bill platypus on a leash, that would.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That would be cool.

[Co-host Hunter]

We should talk to Curly about that.

[Co-host Size]

We should get an emotional platypus farm.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Storage about. Hey, a guy walks in the bar with a duck Bill Platypus holding them.

[Co-host Hunter]

Holding them.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

That is an exotic pad I can get behind.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

It's only in Australia.

[Martin (Host)]

Well, of course it is.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

Can they adapt.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Look at him.

[Co-host Size]

It's venomous.

[Co-host Hunter]

Oh, no.

[Martin (Host)]

Well, that's fine.

[Co-host Size]

What kind of wild.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Hey, he loves crawfish.

[Co-host Hunter]

That's what it says.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

No, no, he does. He loves crawfish. Oh, yeah, that's one of his. That's what he feeds off of.

[Martin (Host)]

What do they call crawfish down there? Yabbies. I don't know, Something like that.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yabbies.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. See?

[Co-host Size]

Education.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Wild looking creatures, though.

[Co-host Hunter]

Oh, yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

Throw him up there real quick. I ain't seen him in a while. Let me see.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

He's cool.

[Co-host Size]

Sorry, I was.

[Martin (Host)]

Isn't that awesome?

[Co-host Size]

Oh, goodness.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Hey, look at him.

[Martin (Host)]

Look at that.

[Co-host Hunter]

Don't he have a tail like a.

[Co-host Size]

No, that's right, like a name.

[Martin (Host)]

Now he's like a backwards beaver.

[Co-host Size]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Martin (Host)]

I thought he had.

[Co-host Hunter]

Oh, yeah.

[Co-host Size]

You know, he looked like a beaver that was walking backwards.

[Co-host Hunter]

He looks like a mix of a lot of things.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, that's awesome.

[Co-host Size]

What is that thing? So you got to get one. Emotional support Bill Platypus.

[Co-host Hunter]

Let's get a water tank in here and put them in there.

[Guest or Listener]

Don't they like sweat milk too, or something?

[Martin (Host)]

What?

[Co-host Hunter]

They lactate.

[Co-host Size]

I think we got to end the show now. I don't know that we can recover from that question.

[Co-host Hunter]

They sweat milk.

[Guest or Listener]

Yeah, it was something like that. Like.

[Co-host Size]

Like, gang, we're about to learn so much more than you ever bargain.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I knew.

[Co-host Size]

I'm listening. Am I wrong? Where's Martin going?

[Martin (Host)]

I'm getting some water.

[Co-host Size]

Martin's just leaving. Oh, we got the water machine over there.

[Co-host Hunter]

Martin on the cup.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Most of the.

[Co-host Size]

No, I think what you're thinking of is they lay eggs, but they also have milk for their young. I don't think they're sweating milk. Hippo sweats pink.

[Co-host Hunter]

Really?

[Co-host Size]

Martin is saying out right now.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Martin's crazy. It's something about. He's right. Hunter's right. It's something about milk.

[Martin (Host)]

Milk.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's a. That's a duck milk platter bush.

[Martin (Host)]

That would have been handy to have.

[Co-host Size]

Holy cow. Hunter's right. Hunter.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I told you he was right.

[Co-host Size]

They ain't got no teats.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh. So you can't milk them.

[Co-host Size]

So you got to sweat your milk out to feed your babies.

[Co-host Hunter]

Interesting.

[Co-host Size]

Y' all telling me this was just by chance.

[Guest or Listener]

Me. Me and Olivia have had many conversations about the platypus.

[Martin (Host)]

Like, how did lactation come up? Leo, we're just talking about platypus.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

When he said it, I knew. I said he got. He's got something. He's right there. Or he's got something.

[Co-host Size]

That is the wildest thing I have ever.

[Martin (Host)]

So when they start sweating, they sweat milk?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, yeah.

[Co-host Size]

To feed their babies. Because they don't have no teats.

[Co-host Hunter]

Teats or teeth.

[Co-host Size]

Teats.

[Co-host Hunter]

Teats.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Well, I don't.

[Martin (Host)]

So what do you think?

[Co-host Hunter]

They have teeth.

[Co-host Size]

Teeth's a weird one, too.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's such a wild looking thing. It really is.

[Martin (Host)]

Think of.

[Co-host Hunter]

You saw that thing sweating milk?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

He walked in here right now.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

How?

[Co-host Hunter]

Walked in here. Would be crazy. Seeing that thing open that door would be the wildest thing I'd ever seen.

[Co-host Size]

We got to get Robert Irwin to bring us one.

[Martin (Host)]

I'm telling you, that is an exotic pet that I can 100% get behind.

[Co-host Hunter]

That is exotic.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I love the way he's shaped. He's got the duck bill and then he goes on the back of him and it looks like it's a beaver tail.

[Co-host Size]

They only weigh five pounds.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, they're little. That's what I'm saying. You can sit here and hold him like.

[Co-host Size]

I thought they were like the size of a basset hound, which would be way cooler because they're kind of shaped like one.

[Martin (Host)]

No, you want him, man. Where you can hold like a little wiener dog. Hold him.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That would be a good fit, see? Yeah, that would be a good.

[Martin (Host)]

See, we're on to something. Now we got to get in the black market trade. A duck billed platype.

[Co-host Size]

I don't think you can bring one of them across ocean without pie.

[Martin (Host)]

What's the plural Hunter? Since y' all have had these many in depth, is it platypi or duck bill?

[Co-host Size]

Platypus for kids.

[Co-host Hunter]

Can we get one off the Silk Road?

[Martin (Host)]

I'm gonna go with platypi.

[Co-host Size]

Platypus sounds right. What do you call a group of duck billed platypus?

[Co-host Hunter]

Flat up pieces.

[Martin (Host)]

A good dang time. That's what you call it. It's not a flock because he just has the bill. What do you call a group of beavers? I don't even know that.

[Co-host Size]

Now that's the thing.

[Martin (Host)]

But that's what I mean, you know that the bee. Beavers.

[Co-host Size]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

I don't know the group of beavers. I know A group of crows is a murder.

[Co-host Size]

A group of beavers is a colony.

[Co-host Hunter]

A group of geese is a gaggle.

[Co-host Size]

Oh, man, I'm so excited for what I'm typing into.

[Martin (Host)]

What is a group of duck billed platypus?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh.

[Martin (Host)]

What are they?

[Co-host Size]

Australia is just doing a good job with this animal. Y' all really need to market this thing some more because I might go there just to see one.

[Martin (Host)]

He's way cooler than a koala.

[Co-host Size]

A group of platypuses is called a paddle.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, that is cool.

[Co-host Size]

Or a puddle.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

A puddle.

[Martin (Host)]

But it is platypuses.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

It's a puddle of platypus.

[Co-host Size]

Look, here's a picture, a cartoon of a puddle of platypuses.

[Martin (Host)]

And there's no milk anywhere.

[Co-host Size]

Well, those are babies. Mom's sweating out the others on some other.

[Martin (Host)]

So do you think they like drink from under her armpit? I wonder where her sweat glamp.

[Co-host Size]

Hunter, it's all over.

[Co-host Hunter]

It's all over.

[Martin (Host)]

Like we licking on toes here or like what are we doing?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Wow. Too far, man.

[Co-host Hunter]

Why milk?

[Martin (Host)]

I just asking.

[Co-host Hunter]

That is nasty.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That is crazy.

[Martin (Host)]

Like I sweat out something totally different.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That is crazy.

[Co-host Hunter]

Hey, just think you could just get some sweaty milk.

[Martin (Host)]

All right, folks, if you got a.

[Co-host Size]

Platypus, you're more if you own a platypus.

[Martin (Host)]

Right here.

[Co-host Size]

117 Kings Lane, Westminster, 129 2.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Let's see.

[Martin (Host)]

We want to play.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Beth, look, we've got people on the edge of their seats.

[Martin (Host)]

Crawfish.

[Co-host Size]

We're a learning podcast of science.

[Co-host Hunter]

What do they eat?

[Martin (Host)]

Never saw us get into platypus today.

[Co-host Size]

I didn't either, but I'm so glad that we did. Larva worm shrimp or fresh water crayfish. Otherwise known as yabbies. Yabbies, yabbies. We are so much.

[Martin (Host)]

Hey, we're definitely smarter than a fifth buggies. I don't know if we're smarter than a sixth grader. We're definitely smarter than fifth grader about something. Even though Hunter didn't get the 32 degree ice joke earlier.

[Co-host Size]

But yeah, really failed on that one. That wasn't. That was before we started recording.

[Martin (Host)]

But he knows that. How do you miss that one? But you know that a platypus sweats milk.

[Co-host Hunter]

Interesting.

[Co-host Size]

So before we started, we were talking about water and the temperature of which you would want to drink it at. And I said, just make sure it's not 32 degrees. Choke on it. And Hunter goes, wait, really? And I was like, huh? And Martin said, that's ice Hunter.

[Guest or Listener]

I can have. I can have my blonde moments sometimes.

[Co-host Size]

I'm proud of you.

[Martin (Host)]

You can, but it's just crazy that.

[Co-host Size]

Does the Monroe Zoo have a platypus?

[Martin (Host)]

No.

[Co-host Hunter]

We should do.

[Martin (Host)]

They do. We're breaking him.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

You gotta go over a wonder.

[Martin (Host)]

If they do, we're busting over.

[Co-host Size]

They got one in San Diego.

[Martin (Host)]

San Diego. Look, it's no secret that we love guns. But, you know, we also have young kids at the house. So you have to be smart when you're thinking about gun safety. And you have to keep your gun put up or people can't get to them. But you also need to be able to get to that gun should the unthinkable happen. And you need to defend your house or defend your family. And that's where Stopbox comes in. Look, the Stop Box Pro. All the things.

[Co-host Size]

I put my phone in it before this ad started.

[Martin (Host)]

Go ahead.

[Co-host Size]

I don't want to. I didn't want to have a gun on set, but. Bye, Al. I'm in. I didn't have to look at Mr. Bad Guy and say, can you give me a few minutes to load this and get it?

[Martin (Host)]

Let me punch in my code.

[Co-host Size]

The battery's dead.

[Martin (Host)]

The Stop Box Pro is 100 mechanical, so it works every time. No power needed. No fumbling with keys, no batteries. And all Stop Box products proudly made right here in the United States of America. Which means you get quality craftsmanship. But more importantly, you're creating American jobs. It is also TSA compliant. You can securely transport your Firearm through checked baggage when you fly, just like we did last week to Wisconsin, or you never have to choose between security and readiness again. You get both without the hassle. Super simple. They got a great offer. Look. For a limited time, our listeners get 15% off at Stopbox. When you use Code Duck call at checkout, head to stopboxusa.com and use code duck call. There we go. For 15% off your entire order. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them we sent you.

[Guest or Listener]

Did you say that? Platypus. Platypi.

[Martin (Host)]

Platypuses.

[Co-host Size]

Platypuses.

[Guest or Listener]

Oh, okay.

[Martin (Host)]

Platypuses. It only gets weird if you slow it down.

[Guest or Listener]

I was making sure I'm saying it right. Are they, like, more in Australia?

[Co-host Size]

They're only in Australia.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, they're in Denmark.

[Co-host Size]

Unless there's a couple of them in San Diego that relocate.

[Guest or Listener]

Can I tell you my favorite Australian fun fact?

[Co-host Hunter]

Depends.

[Martin (Host)]

I don't see why not. Great. I have a microphone. This is America.

[Co-host Size]

I'm worried. But have you.

[Guest or Listener]

Have you heard of the emu war in Australia?

[Martin (Host)]

The emu war?

[Co-host Size]

The emu war in Australia of 1932? Yeah, yeah, I've heard of it.

[Martin (Host)]

Have you?

[Co-host Size]

Okay, I just googled it as well. Oh, really? Oh, I'm very quick.

[Co-host Hunter]

They.

[Guest or Listener]

They lost the war against the emus not once, but twice, and it is one of my favorite stories.

[Co-host Size]

War against what?

[Co-host Hunter]

Human beings.

[Guest or Listener]

Emus. Yeah. They were trying to control the population of emus and then they couldn't. Then they tried again later, and then they lost again. And it's one of my favorite things.

[Co-host Hunter]

To read about because they don't have guns.

[Co-host Size]

Emus. Sigh. The good folks of Australia lost a war against birds.

[Co-host Hunter]

They look like ostriches.

[Co-host Size]

I mean, they're big birds, not the big bird, but.

[Guest or Listener]

But don't ask me.

[Co-host Size]

The temperature of ice in 1930 2000.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

They had a war with birds and lost.

[Martin (Host)]

How do you lose that?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

How do you lose a bird?

[Co-host Size]

Would you like me to read about it?

[Martin (Host)]

I just want to know how you declare a loss.

[Co-host Size]

We're difficult to kill.

[Martin (Host)]

Shoot them in the head.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah, they have guns.

[Co-host Size]

The birds could survive multiple shots and were incredibly fast, often outrunning vehicles.

[Martin (Host)]

All right, Tina, at heavy shot. We're friends. We love you. I want to go shoot emus with heavy shot, heavy 12, and show these Australians how you win this war.

[Co-host Size]

But they didn't have.

[Martin (Host)]

I will eat the emus, by the way, for all you that just jumped in the car. I can't believe you said we'll skin them and we'll eat them because they got to be good.

[Co-host Size]

This was 1932.

[Co-host Hunter]

Though.

[Martin (Host)]

I understand. But the emu still didn't have a gun.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah. They didn't have a gun.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. But I'm not saying 32. We were in the First World War. So, like, the M1 Garand was available.

[Co-host Size]

They did kill 986 of the EMUs.

[Co-host Hunter]

So technically. How did they lose?

[Co-host Size]

988 people died.

[Co-host Hunter]

They.

[Co-host Size]

I'm just kidding. I totally made that up.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's not true.

[Co-host Hunter]

I was about to say. This is crazy.

[Martin (Host)]

That's as true as a man riding a giraffe got that money.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

They didn't really go to war. I don't want to hear this.

[Co-host Size]

They did.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

All right.

[Martin (Host)]

Did the emus know it was a war?

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

Did they?

[Co-host Size]

Emus had no idea.

[Martin (Host)]

They declared their flag somewhere like Ayers Rock. Isn't that a big deal in Australia? Hunter. Why do we know so much about Australia?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

By the.

[Martin (Host)]

The.

[Co-host Size]

Apparently one day just 20,000 emus showed up.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Crocodile dandy.

[Martin (Host)]

20,000. And they only got 900 of them.

[Co-host Size]

I mean.

[Martin (Host)]

What. You don't fly? Do they?

[Co-host Size]

You just want them getting a Model T and run it down.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Fly. But they're fast.

[Co-host Hunter]

They just snipe them.

[Co-host Size]

What kind of cars do we have in 1932?

[Martin (Host)]

Apparently down there. Subaru wasn't there yet. I don't know. Man.

[Co-host Size]

Fastest car in 1932.

[Martin (Host)]

When was outback Steakhouse founded. Because that's Aussie.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I'd be. Though. That'd be the first.

[Co-host Size]

Remember when their cheese fries were really good? Now they're just pretty good.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yep.

[Martin (Host)]

Well.

[Co-host Hunter]

And they had that Mac.

[Martin (Host)]

At the end of the day. They're still cheese.

[Co-host Hunter]

Their Mac and cheese used to be really good too.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Mac and cheese.

[Co-host Size]

We're learning. If any of you.

[Martin (Host)]

I've never been more proud to not be Australian than right now.

[Co-host Size]

Whoa.

[Co-host Hunter]

I agree.

[Martin (Host)]

Well, you lost to some birds. The rest of the world was fighting a world war.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Guest or Listener]

Not once.

[Martin (Host)]

And you're down there getting whooped by 20,000 emus. Like.

[Co-host Hunter]

And you conceded.

[Co-host Size]

You almost got beat by one ostrich. That's all I'm saying.

[Martin (Host)]

He did run me in my truck. But I was also asked not to shoot him.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah. That's.

[Martin (Host)]

If it were. If it were just street rules. I'd have had a dead ostrich.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That's it.

[Martin (Host)]

But like, I. I was asked to not do that. So I did everything in my power to honor the request. To not shoot the ostrich also just, you know.

[Co-host Size]

Because I know a lot of questions have been coming up this episode and we left somebody hanging. The Outback Steakhouse was founded in March 15th of 1988. So after the emu war, no rules.

[Martin (Host)]

Just right.

[Co-host Size]

Apparently there are rules when fighting emu. So. And the fastest car in 1932 could go 140.

[Martin (Host)]

Wow.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

140.

[Co-host Size]

I would.

[Martin (Host)]

Don't mean it made it down there.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Well the email couldn't outrun that.

[Co-host Size]

Ah. That would run an emu down and just leave him bump in the road at some point.

[Martin (Host)]

Don't you just go bowling?

[Co-host Size]

There used to be some emus on Green Road. Now I'm worried for my safety.

[Martin (Host)]

Really. Did your uncle used to raise emu? He did Mac.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

He did.

[Co-host Size]

Ostrich.

[Martin (Host)]

Ostrich.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, I thought he had the emu.

[Co-host Size]

I was once the nephew of a man who owned an entire ostrich ostrich farm. There was one rule. When you went to the ostrich farm. Do not put your finger through the chain link fence. It will not come back with you.

[Martin (Host)]

They take your finger off.

[Co-host Hunter]

They have teeth.

[Co-host Size]

Have you seen an ostrich?

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. But yes I have. Closer than most. Without offense. In between us.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

I've only seen them with a fence. An ostrich is like a modern day raptor pterodactyl mixed.

[Martin (Host)]

Okay. That's one way to put it. 300 million years ago. That have been something.

[Co-host Hunter]

They are big. I've seen one up close.

[Co-host Size]

Then they're mean.

[Martin (Host)]

They are me.

[Co-host Size]

They look mean because they are me.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

He ordered their eggs too.

[Martin (Host)]

He had his bluff in one of their eggs.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

I've ate their eggs.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

They're good.

[Co-host Size]

You remember that show figured out on Nickelodeon, huh. Where they would have to figure out what the kids were doing with their lives. My cousin was on that show and it was like Cali. Owen grew up on an ostrich farm and they didn't get it and she won a trip to space camp. Which is also probably a lie.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Really.

[Co-host Size]

Just space camp. She went there. But you know what are they teaching? But yeah. No, we had an ostrich farm. Not we. My uncle did.

[Martin (Host)]

Unbelievable.

[Co-host Hunter]

Did they make boots out of the ostriches there?

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

But ostriches can run 44 miles an hour.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

Faster than me.

[Martin (Host)]

Them long legged rascals are you?

[Co-host Size]

Yeah.

[Martin (Host)]

I'm telling you. I saw one at point blank range. He ran me into my truck.

[Co-host Size]

Was he taller than you?

[Martin (Host)]

He felt bigger than me. I didn't stop to measure six, five versus whatever he was.

[Co-host Size]

I don't know what. Wikipedia has apparently gone European on us. It's got kilograms. I don't know how to convert this.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Like an alligator. Got three toes. What?

[Martin (Host)]

He did have some toes on him.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I mean, hey, you're, you know. Mac got one of them, thumped him.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, that's what that one did to Miller. He rare back and kicked him. They do. Like a forward.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah, yeah. Boom.

[Martin (Host)]

Right in the tree.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Knocked him down.

[Co-host Hunter]

And Mikey did kill him.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, Mikey did kill him. Mikey did not honor the request.

[Co-host Hunter]

Mikey did shoot ostrich.

[Martin (Host)]

He did, yeah. That was about 10 minutes after he run me in my truck.

[Co-host Size]

An ostrich can get up to nine foot tall.

[Martin (Host)]

He was big. That neck was up there.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

What did they weigh?

[Co-host Hunter]

They gotta be all I know.

[Co-host Size]

Can you imagine watching a lion in an ostrich fight? I bet PBS has done it.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I'm like, bbf may have done that.

[Co-host Size]

Ostrich killed lions.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Is that what it said?

[Co-host Hunter]

No.

[Co-host Size]

This is going to be AI again and Hunter's gonna have to correct me.

[Co-host Hunter]

Choke them out with their neck.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

All right, here they go.

[Martin (Host)]

I'll just kick the piss out of them.

[Co-host Size]

That jaguar's got that ostrich by that neck and that foot is just go thrashing. This is a wild YouTube video.

[Martin (Host)]

And why is it not up on the screen? Yeah, why are you the only one watching it?

[Co-host Size]

Yeah, me and tire watch.

[Martin (Host)]

I don't care.

[Co-host Size]

It's like me versus Jeff and Jessica's cats. I'm just kidding.

[Martin (Host)]

Wait, which one are you?

[Co-host Size]

I'm the ostrich. Their cats are everywhere.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, they got a bunch of cats. Have they turned into crazy cat people?

[Co-host Size]

Oh, I don't want to use the term crazy.

[Martin (Host)]

Isn't that a colloquial term? I mean, that's like a term of endearment.

[Co-host Size]

They got a lot of cats.

[Martin (Host)]

Cats.

[Co-host Hunter]

We'll leave it at that.

[Co-host Size]

There's your cats.

[Martin (Host)]

There you go.

[Co-host Size]

I don't get cats.

[Martin (Host)]

I don't either.

[Co-host Size]

Unless it's like a big cat.

[Martin (Host)]

I just don't trust them.

[Co-host Hunter]

I think cats are good for killing rats and snakes.

[Martin (Host)]

Anyway, I'm out on cats.

[Co-host Size]

There's a reason I'm proud to to say Pure Talk is my wireless company. Cuz they don't just talk the talk, they walk the walk. Especially when it comes to supporting our veterans. This month, Pure Talk is supporting K9s for Warriors, an incredible organization that rescues and trains dogs, then pairs them with veterans struggling with ptsd. These are the men and Women who served with honor. But when they came home, that brotherhood, that support network that they had in the military, too often that disappears. K9 for warriors steps in to fill that gap, giving these heroes purpose, companionship and healing. And that's exactly why Pure Talk, a veteran led company, supports them. And so really, choosing a wireless company has never been easier. And with talk, text and plenty of 5G data for just $25 a month, you could be sporting a worthy cause while saving a lot of money.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

You know what I call that?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Martin. What?

[Co-host Size]

A win. Win. Win size. Not big into cell phones, but he's big into Pure Talk. That's all you need to know. So go to PureTalk.com doctor to make the switch today again, go to PureTalk.com and switch to America's wireless company, Pure Talk. Also mine. Martin, I've got big news.

[Martin (Host)]

Big news.

[Co-host Size]

Hello @duck call room.com.

[Martin (Host)]

Huh?

[Co-host Size]

I got an email. And it's weird that they emailed it on the weekend of your children's birthday. Third birthday. The Martin twins turned three this weekend.

[Martin (Host)]

They did? Yeah. We had us. We had us a grand old time turning three.

[Co-host Size]

It was a celebration, if you will.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

But every once in a while a subject line catches my eye. And this one did. Hunter emails in.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Not.

[Co-host Size]

Not this Hunter. Careful, Different Hunter. We don't know where. Yeah, we do know where he's from. Duh. Oh, I don't even know how to pronounce that. Delonga, Georgia.

[Martin (Host)]

Dalla Nega.

[Co-host Size]

No, no, no, no.

[Martin (Host)]

It's. It's Dalla Nega. A dive bar in Dalla Nega. The Hunter.

[Guest or Listener]

I went there. That's not how they said it.

[Martin (Host)]

Hunter.

[Co-host Size]

Oh, boy. Did you send an email while you're there?

[Co-host Hunter]

No. Did they sweat milk there?

[Guest or Listener]

It called it Dalagna. Oh, I can't even say.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

That ain't the way they said. He said it.

[Co-host Size]

He said there's a town in Georgia with a silly name that Hunter's from and Hunter's been to. And am I wrong, who knows semi.

[Martin (Host)]

Famous country and western song that's called a dive bar in Dalla Nego.

[Co-host Size]

It's the same.

[Guest or Listener]

He's pronouncing it wrong.

[Co-host Size]

Then who's Nick?

[Co-host Hunter]

Yeah. Who's my.

[Guest or Listener]

My friend that I lives there. Yeah. I have two friends in Atlanta. I went to a wedding and I visited them. I was a groomsman.

[Co-host Hunter]

And continue with.

[Martin (Host)]

The end of the story.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Okay.

[Co-host Size]

All right. Anyway, there's a strange town in Georgia that I don't know how to pronounce that Hunter's. From. But that the subject line is weird dream about Martin.

[Co-host Hunter]

I'm sorry.

[Co-host Size]

Oh, you will be.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh.

[Martin (Host)]

Why?

[Co-host Size]

Somebody. Hey, guys. Just wanted to warn Martin because I had a dream the other night.

[Martin (Host)]

Okay.

[Co-host Size]

Where he had.

[Martin (Host)]

Stop.

[Co-host Size]

Another stop. Set. Stop.

[Martin (Host)]

Of Stop.

[Co-host Size]

Twins.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

I ain't no effort.

[Co-host Size]

I don't think it meant anything at all. Hunter goes on to say, but just wanted to let Martin know to maybe take some extra precautions just in case. Brett, buddy, I don't know what extra precautions Martin can take.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, there's not a lot more I can do.

[Co-host Size]

If this is the Lord's will and he told it to you in a dream, man, it's gonna happen.

[Martin (Host)]

I just hope you had.

[Co-host Size]

It was like, so now it's your twins or three. Are you ready for another set? No, that's where we're getting.

[Martin (Host)]

No, I was gonna say I hope it was maybe just my face on like John Luke's body or something and he got the news of them announcing their twins confused with me or. You know, I don't know. I don't. I.

[Co-host Size]

People are. I love. My People are dreaming about you having another set in Georgia of all places.

[Martin (Host)]

I love my boys. And now that they're three, they are a lot of fun like it is. You forget about the first 15 to 18 months where it was just survival and now they are a ton of fun. I don't want to go back to those first 18 months, man. I don't.

[Co-host Hunter]

What would you Describe the first 18 as?

[Martin (Host)]

It's a blur. Like, I don't. I don't remember much of anything. Jackson, I mean, we had our first. Jackson chipped a tooth this weekend at the pumpkin patch. Yeah, they got that big, like, Bob looking thing.

[Co-host Size]

Sweet.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. So. But you know, there's a bunch of kids, probably 7 to 10 on it.

[Co-host Size]

3 year olds run that thing.

[Martin (Host)]

And Jackson said, oh, I'm their size.

[Co-host Size]

Watch this.

[Martin (Host)]

And went up there, wasn't long, bumped heads with another one, come back, we got a piece of a tooth missing. You know, the whole tooth will leave at some point. So it's not that big of a deal. He was fine. He cried for just a hot minute and then, you know, the attention span of a nat. Let's go do this. And he was gone and all was well with the world, you know, so. Yeah, I don't want. I mean, if it is the Lord's will, there's not a lot I can do to stop it.

[Co-host Size]

It. I just like.

[Martin (Host)]

So it doesn't matter.

[Co-host Size]

You need to take extra precautions.

[Martin (Host)]

According yeah, I'm not doing that. I've done the precaution. I can do other than. Other than that. I'm not gonna do the steps to undo said precaution, but I'm not taking any more. I mean, what's been done has been done, so. But thanks, I guess.

[Co-host Size]

And people are dreaming about you.

[Martin (Host)]

That's cool. Really? No, I don't. I'm.

[Co-host Size]

What in the world?

[Martin (Host)]

I don't even dream about me.

[Co-host Hunter]

I haven't had a dream of Martin.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah. But, yeah, we can wrap it up. I know.

[Co-host Size]

Size.

[Martin (Host)]

Size. Got to go. So this is going to be a little bit on the shorter side.

[Co-host Size]

Hold on.

[Co-host Hunter]

Is I having twins?

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, I hope not. I kind of hope so.

[Co-host Size]

Like, that is scary, because that Malvern, Arkansas, is not far from here, is it?

[Martin (Host)]

No. Malvern.

[Co-host Size]

A mountain lion got ran over.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, yeah, I saw that. Yeah. Got killed. Roadkill just outside Malvern's, just outside Hot Springs. That may be the one God. One talking about on his trail camera, because that's where he deer hunts right there.

[Co-host Size]

That's terrifying.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah.

[Co-host Size]

Look at this thing of it. Even though he's laying in the road.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, he's a big one. That's a good one. That's a good cat there, ma'.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Am.

[Martin (Host)]

That's a good one.

[Co-host Size]

And Martin doesn't believe we can have them.

[Martin (Host)]

I. I know. We got him. Did you see how brown he was? I've never denied the existence of brown cats here.

[Co-host Hunter]

We're just talking about the black cat. The firework shop.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, it's the one that's on the nasty. What happened?

[Co-host Size]

I had a few emails to go through. Allison, great name. From Bloomington, Indiana.

[Martin (Host)]

She got a weird snake.

[Co-host Size]

She's got a weird snake. It's named Sid. It's a pet ball python.

[Martin (Host)]

Why would you name it Sid?

[Co-host Hunter]

We have an infection and he wears a sombrero.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, well, that's why you name him Sid.

[Co-host Size]

You've watched way too many cartoons. Lady sombreros on a snake is objectively hilarious.

[Martin (Host)]

And shouldn't you name him Speedy? That's a Speedy Gonzalez.

[Co-host Size]

That's a mouse.

[Martin (Host)]

I know, but Sid was also a sloth or whatever. He was on Ice Age.

[Co-host Hunter]

What was the snake's name on Robin Hood? The cartoon? The one that was like, the prince's, like, little company guy. You know what I'm talking about?

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, man.

[Co-host Hunter]

You know what I'm talking about?

[Co-host Size]

Yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

He gets, like, drunk, and they show him that wine bottle, and he gets.

[Co-host Size]

Like, yeah, you don't want to be. He has a little hat.

[Co-host Hunter]

He has that little hat on.

[Martin (Host)]

Wait, time out. A snake got drunk and the Robin. What's his name?

[Co-host Hunter]

His name was Hiss.

[Co-host Size]

Robin Hood. The cartoon. It's one of the greatest cartoons of all time.

[Co-host Hunter]

Yes, it is.

[Co-host Size]

Robin Hood's a fox.

[Co-host Hunter]

Prince John.

[Co-host Size]

Little John's a bear. Prince John's a lion.

[Martin (Host)]

Oh, that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Co-host Hunter]

He gets mad at him and, like, shoves him in a wine barrel and he comes out and he's, like, spitting bubbles.

[Co-host Size]

It's up there with men in tight.

[Co-host Hunter]

That's such a good one.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Long live the king.

[Martin (Host)]

A drunk snake man. That's funny.

[Co-host Size]

Don't want to run into one of those.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Oh, heck.

[Co-host Size]

Anyway, we gotta go.

[Martin (Host)]

Yeah, I just gotta leave, so.

[Co-host Size]

First of the day. This is the most simple I can make it. Psalm 34. 14. Turn from evil and do good. Seek peace and pursue it.

[Martin (Host)]

There you go. The most peaceful thing I know. Sleep a duck. Bill Platypus.

[Guest or Co-host 1]

Thank you.

[Co-host Size]

Those got to be given good lives.