Uncle Si Has Proof He’s Better than Jase Robertson at Everything

Summary

Duck Call Room Podcast Summary

Episode Title: Uncle Si Has Proof He’s Better than Jase Robertson at Everything
Release Date: January 7, 2025
Hosts: Si Robertson, Justin Martin, John-David Owen, John Godwin, Jay Stone, and Phillip McMillan

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Introduction to Appreciation Day

The episode kicks off with Si Robertson proposing the creation of a new holiday called Appreciation Day. Si suggests writing a letter to President Trump to establish this day, emphasizing the importance of counting blessings and giving gratitude to God.

• Si Robertson (00:40): "Welcome to the podcast, folks. We need a new holiday... it's going to be called Appreciation Day."
• Phil Robertson (01:09): "Fourth Thursday of November."
• Jase Robertson (01:11): "Yeah, sounds a lot like Thanksgiving to me."

The hosts debate the best timing for Appreciation Day, ultimately suggesting April 27th as the new date, differentiating it from Thanksgiving while retaining some of its essence.

• Si Robertson (03:03): "I like that down the middle."
• Jase Robertson (03:10): "I like it down the middle."

The Importance of Gratitude

Si elaborates on why Appreciation Day is necessary, listing three immediate reasons to be thankful: being alive, having some health, and living in the United States.

• Si Robertson (01:22): "And I can name three just right away. Okay, first of all, you know you're alive... Then, hey, you got some type of health... And then the next one is, hey, you live in the United States of America."
• Phil Robertson (02:00): "You live on Earth, not Mars."

Si emphasizes that appreciating one's blessings is crucial, especially in challenging times.

• Si Robertson (02:07): "If you doubt about there's evil on this earth... We live on, on a wicked planet, folks."

Hunting Adventures and Anecdotes

The conversation shifts to hunting experiences, where Si shares his prowess compared to Jase. He recounts effortlessly shooting a CO op 70 during a duck hunt, highlighting his superior hunting skills.

• Si Robertson (26:31): "I just let him. And I was yelling. Then I just put it right on that head, pulled the trigger."
• Phil Robertson (26:15): "Couldn't do it, could they?"

The hosts humorously discuss attempts by others to replicate Si's hunting success, leading to light-hearted banter about missing shots and the unpredictability of hunting.

Fun with the Zoo and Birds

Later, the discussion veers towards wildlife encounters at the Monroe Zoo, sharing amusing stories about seagulls and other animals.

• Phil Robertson (27:05): "How cool is that? He's got his own seagull that actually comes and lands on the boat to be fed."
• Si Robertson (28:01): "They got pictures of him. It's the same, the same seagull."

The hosts reminisce about their favorite animals at the zoo, including black panthers, hippos, and tortoises, blending their fond memories with playful critiques.

• Phil Robertson (34:01): "There might have been a limit on it, but I don't think five gallons was the limit."
• Jase Robertson (34:16): "They got a big old deer last time I was there."

Side Conversations: Walmart, Movies, and More

The episode features various tangential conversations, including:

1. Walmart Shopping:
   The hosts humorously debate the merits of shopping at Walmart, with Phil defending its convenience despite previous criticisms.

   • Phil Robertson (36:27): "I owe that. John [e-mail] that's S O F H O L D dot com."

2. Movie Reviews:
   Phil expresses his disdain for recent movies like Sonic the Hedgehog 3, while Hunter supports the film for featuring Keanu Reeves.

   • Phil Robertson (15:22): "It was the worst thing I've ever been a part of."
   • Hunter (15:44): "Keanu Reeves is in it. It can't be bad."

3. Wedding Stories:
   The hosts share amusing wedding experiences, including Phil's brief stint as a wedding officiant and humorous advice on handling awkward relationship scenarios.

   • Phil Robertson (40:07): "He was the whole shebang. It was so good and fast."
   • Si Robertson (46:51): "Hey, Gina, you grab this clown..."

Product Promotions and Advertisements

Throughout the episode, the hosts seamlessly integrate promotions for various products, maintaining their signature humor and relatability:

1. Helix Sleep Mattresses:

   • Jase Robertson (10:31): "Helix has got something for you. We've all got the Helix mattresses unashamed."
   • Phil Robertson (11:27): "That's helixsleep.com for 25 percent off sitewide..."

2. Mando Deodorant:

   • Jase Robertson (19:04): "Mando offers solid deodorant stick that will stop odor before it starts."
   • Phil Robertson (19:35): "But you can find them in Walmart, Target..."

3. Nutrafol Hair Supplements:

   • Jase Robertson (30:02): "Nutrafol is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand."
   • Si Robertson (31:57): "Use code [e-mail]..."

4. Soft Hold Gun Mounts:

   • Phil Robertson (42:22): "These mounts will hold any gun you own..."
   • Jase Robertson (43:55): "Use code [e-mail] today."

Listener Interactions and Voicemails

Towards the end of the episode, the hosts engage with listener voicemails, offering humorous and candid advice:

1. Relationship Advice:

   • Jenna from Ohio (46:30): Seeks advice on reaching out to a guy she likes.
   • Si Robertson (46:51): "Hey, you put one on him. Kiss this dude like you ain't never kissed anybody before."
   • Phil Robertson (46:35): "Walk up and say something else, but. Or kiss him."

2. Future Wedding Plans:

   • Jase Robertson (41:07): "I'll throw him a good party."
   • Phil Robertson (41:08): "As a man who was recently a best man."

Concluding Remarks and Teasers

The episode wraps up with playful exchanges about future podcast material and upcoming topics, maintaining the lighthearted and engaging tone characteristic of the Duck Call Room.

• Phil Robertson (55:56): "And I'm gonna say the Lord led us here to Psalm 11:25..."
• Jase Robertson (56:05): "All right, we'll see y'all next time."

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Si Robertson (01:22): "Here, you gotta have the critic. Okay. You gotta have the critic."
• Phil Robertson (15:22): "It was the worst thing I've ever been a part of."
• Si Robertson (46:51): "Hey, you put one on him. Kiss this dude like you ain't never kissed anybody before."
• Phil Robertson (55:56): "Because I've been told by others he was the most generous person that they ever met."

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Conclusion

In this episode of Duck Call Room, Uncle Si and the crew blend humor, heartfelt stories, and candid conversations, all while advocating for a new holiday centered on gratitude. From hunting tales and zoo anecdotes to product promotions and listener interactions, the episode offers a rich and engaging experience for both long-time fans and newcomers alike. The hosts' chemistry shines through, making complex discussions feel effortless and entertaining.

For those who haven't listened, this episode encapsulates the essence of Duck Call Room: a mix of humor, family stories, and light-hearted debates, all wrapped up in the camaraderie of the Robertson family and their friends.

Transcript

[Phil Robertson]

If you need three new reasons to love Jack wraps at Jack in the Box, even more.

[Si Robertson]

Here they are.

[Phil Robertson]

Chicken fajita, chicken Caesar, and delicious. Starting at $3. Coincidentally, those are the same three reasons you should come to Jack in the Box right now at Jack. Every bite's a big deal.

[Si Robertson]

Let's kick this baby off here. We ready?

[Phil Robertson]

I don't think we've ever not been ready. Martin, are you ready?

[Si Robertson]

Almost in. President Trump, we ready to run.

[Jase Robertson]

Okay.

[Si Robertson]

Hey. Yeah. Welcome to the podcast, folks. We need a new holiday. I'm going to write a letter to President Trump, and we're going to get a new holiday. And it's going to be called Appreciation Day. And what you're going to do is you're going to count your many blessings, okay?

[Martin]

Mandatory.

[Si Robertson]

Mandatory. And then you gonna give God the glory for blessing your sorry hide as much as he has. Can we do it like you definitely don't deserve it.

[Phil Robertson]

Fourth Thursday of November.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, sounds a lot like Thanksgiving to me.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, that'd be fine.

[Phil Robertson]

Appreciation Day, you know, the day where you're thankful for everything you've been given.

[Si Robertson]

How about that?

[Martin]

The one we already have.

[Si Robertson]

And I can name three just right away. Okay, first of all, you know you're alive.

[Martin]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Ought to be thankful for that. Then, hey, you got some, some type of health. Okay. You may have some issues, but hey, you're alive and got pretty healthy.

[Phil Robertson]

Thank you for that.

[Si Robertson]

And then the next one is, hey, you live in the United States of America.

[Phil Robertson]

Not every we've really had.

[Si Robertson]

You ought to be thankful for that.

[Phil Robertson]

That is true. But not everybody that listens is Irish or American.

[Si Robertson]

Well, that's what I'm talking about.

[Phil Robertson]

You live on Earth, not Mars.

[Si Robertson]

Well, I'm just saying you could live worse places in the United States of America. Well, that's all I'm saying.

[Phil Robertson]

100%.

[Si Robertson]

If you doubt about there's evil on this earth, look at what happened in New Orleans on New Year's Day. Yeah, yeah, we live, you know, we live it on, on a wicked planet, folks.

[Martin]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Okay. And hey, look, you better be thankful for what God has given you, okay? And appreciate it, okay? That's all I'm saying. That's why I say I, I like it.

[Phil Robertson]

A new holiday, Appreciation Day. It's like double Thanksgiving. When are we doing it? What's the date?

[Si Robertson]

Right.

[Martin]

I say Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving Eve. Well, Thanksgiving Eve, if we're gonna make.

[Phil Robertson]

Our own holiday, we got different.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, it's already got one, but.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, no, this is a new one. We have Thanksgiving No, I know.

[Jase Robertson]

That's what I'm saying. Like, Thanksgiving's already got its deal. So this one.

[Phil Robertson]

So we gotta amp like we got.

[Si Robertson]

Here's what you do.

[Jase Robertson]

All right.

[Si Robertson]

Put it in half between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

[Martin]

I like that down the middle.

[Phil Robertson]

That's too many holidays.

[Jase Robertson]

There's. That's too much. Yeah, we need. This needs to be like, in April.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, that's easy.

[Si Robertson]

That'll work.

[Jase Robertson]

But sometimes Easter is up there in March 7th.

[Si Robertson]

April.

[Phil Robertson]

20Th birthday. April. Okay, so our proposal to the Light. I mean, there's not. That's not a big holiday area.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

So April 27th, we're going to have National Appreciation Day.

[Jase Robertson]

Now the real question is, what are we eating? Yeah. What's the official food of Thanksgiving?

[Phil Robertson]

Got a turkey.

[Si Robertson]

Well, hey, you know what? You know what? I always. My. My first sage duck dressing.

[Phil Robertson]

It's April.

[Si Robertson]

Dressing. Just take it out of the freezer.

[Martin]

Why don't we make it Uncle Sa Day now?

[Si Robertson]

We will make it appreciation, and then we can glory.

[Martin]

Yeah. On that day, Appreciation Day.

[Phil Robertson]

I. You know what I'm going to say Duck dressing should not be the official food.

[Si Robertson]

Well, hey, I guess. Yeah. And it's the wrong time of year.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Martin]

But I like it. Sigh. Because when I was in college at Abilene Christian, we had to write down 10 things in this one class. 10, 10 things that's good about your day today. 10 good things in your life. And people sat in there. There's a. I don't know, 50 or 60 people in this class. And it was hard for a lot of people to come up with 10 things that were good in their life.

[Si Robertson]

I got to give my hats off to old Jason Robinson, because when he was teaching the youths at church.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, boy. I was in the class.

[Si Robertson]

He told them all, he said, walk in class today. And he said, okay, here what I want. Here's what I want y'all to do. Close your eyes and get the image of God and tell me what your image of God is. Which is cool because most of them went and they didn't know what to say. Mac Owens told me his image, which is. Was the life he lived. And then when he come to Jesus and it's changed, I can see why. He said he was a white head old man. Okay. With flowing, flowing long hair. Okay. And fire. Just like charcoal. Eyes blazing with fire. He was up there just waiting for you to mess up and hammer you.

[Phil Robertson]

So Zeus, if you will.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Yeah. So. Yeah. But I thought that was cool. Way Jace put that.

[Martin]

Okay, there it is.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Yeah. Because it's just the opposite of what you can come up with.

[Martin]

Yeah, that's right.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, the almighty Lil. The Trinity loves the human race.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Martin]

If you got up this morning, that's good.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Martin]

Did you have transportation? You were going. Still breathing?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Bridget Tatum, who used to be with me in my bed. Okay. She's a songwriter and a singer. But she said, you know, who woke you up this morning? And the answer is, hey, Jesus allowed you to wake up this morning. Okay. Which is pretty cool. Okay. In my humble opinion.

[Martin]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

But I just think, you know, hey, you know, your image of God, if you think he's up there with a hammer waiting, just mess. You don't hammer you when you mess up. It's just the opposite. He's there because he, you know, the Trinity loves this messed up human race.

[Martin]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

He gave us free will number one. But we make our own choices. And like the Bible says, we're drawn to the evil one by our own evil desires. Okay. So it's just, you know, it's one of the things that I. Look, you need to show some kind of appreciation for where you're at in your life.

[Martin]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Okay. Because hey, you could. Hey, it can always get worse, buddy.

[Martin]

You ain't kidding. Yeah, we. We see a lot of that.

[Si Robertson]

You better. You need to thank. Just stop and look and see why. What's good about your life.

[Phil Robertson]

And we're going to do that on April 27 on national appreciation Day.

[Si Robertson]

Right.

[Phil Robertson]

When we eat whatever gourmet sandwiches.

[Si Robertson]

That's it.

[Phil Robertson]

Everybody creates the greatest sandwich that they can.

[Si Robertson]

Johnny Gon live that one.

[Phil Robertson]

Exactly.

[Si Robertson]

Give me a hand sandwich.

[Phil Robertson]

And you have. You just see who can make the best sandwich on National Appreciate. It's. It's like a great day for sandwiches.

[Si Robertson]

I just gave you a.

[Phil Robertson]

What's wrong with sandwiches?

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, they're not as good as pizza.

[Si Robertson]

Well, it's a good point.

[Phil Robertson]

We don't get Pete. The pizza doesn't have a holiday.

[Jase Robertson]

That's because it's every day.

[Si Robertson]

That's true. There's always a good celebration.

[Martin]

I'd rather have hot food anyway.

[Si Robertson]

I'll tell you. Okay. It ain't nothing better than a good.

[Phil Robertson]

You ain't never had a hot sandwich.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. Grilled cheese and.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Martin]

Come on.

[Si Robertson]

Hey.

[Jase Robertson]

I feel it's way more into leftovers.

[Martin]

If you heat them up. If you heat them up, you can.

[Phil Robertson]

Heat up any sandwich.

[Si Robertson]

That's actually a long trip. Bringing home in the suitcase.

[Martin]

Yeah, I did that one time. And then they won't get off of it.

[Phil Robertson]

That's a man who's appreciative for good food.

[Si Robertson]

That's right.

[Phil Robertson]

If he'll bring it home in a suitcase.

[Si Robertson]

Man appreciates good food. He takes it to the everywhere you.

[Jase Robertson]

Go or either the food at home's that bad. But I. You boys are a lot more chipper than I thought. I heard you and you two wasn't getting along. What?

[Martin]

Oh, we ain't ever getting along. He's always doing something to me. But which? What now? What are you talking about now?

[Jase Robertson]

I don't know. Jace just said y'all were mad at each other.

[Phil Robertson]

When did Jay say that?

[Jase Robertson]

This morning.

[Si Robertson]

They don't understand.

[Jase Robertson]

While we were duck.

[Si Robertson]

I don't understand.

[Martin]

That's funny.

[Jase Robertson]

He said y'all were mad at each other. And he's officially been blacklisted from yalls poker game.

[Martin]

He said that?

[Jase Robertson]

That's the way.

[Phil Robertson]

Who's blacklisted? J. Oh, Jace is blacklisted.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, he said that? He said that to himself. I. Look, what he's doing is bragging on his plate. He's saying he's so good that they don't invite him anymore.

[Jase Robertson]

He did that? That was a direct quote as well.

[Si Robertson]

That's a quote. Now that's a quote.

[Martin]

I can't. I can't believe he said that about me. And sigh.

[Jase Robertson]

He said y'all were mad at each other.

[Martin]

Oh, we're best friends. We love each other.

[Jase Robertson]

Because somebody. One of you. One of you got the other one with like an inside straight draw or something.

[Martin]

Now that happens all the time.

[Jase Robertson]

But.

[Martin]

But the same thing happens to everybody else. I mean, I've seen sign Willie.

[Phil Robertson]

I feel like there's a story here that they're not wanting to die.

[Martin]

To the couch. What?

[Phil Robertson]

Did something happen?

[Martin]

I don't think so.

[Si Robertson]

He went home broke.

[Martin]

Well, that's not unusual.

[Si Robertson]

That's not unusual. And look, it's been my way too. I've called home.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, were you upset?

[Martin]

No. No. And. And size had to go. Size had to leave the table. Just go sit on the couch and be broke. Yeah, and watch the rest of us.

[Si Robertson]

I'm out of money. Okay.

[Martin]

It wasn't no squalling tires. There was no. It's like.

[Si Robertson]

I mean, they all over laughing because I was in my cow in my recliner crying.

[Jase Robertson]

When you get to this point of hunting season, you know what's key? A good night's sleep.

[Si Robertson]

All right. And guess where you going to get that.

[Jase Robertson]

Where?

[Si Robertson]

Hey, you got to be sleeping on a cloud.

[Jase Robertson]

I guarantee you that. Helix Cloud.

[Si Robertson]

That's a Helix cloud, baby.

[Phil Robertson]

I sleep on the moon, you know, Right.

[Si Robertson]

I took the test, boys, and I passed it.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Now from ever you take that two.

[Jase Robertson]

Minute Helix sleep quiz, they will pair you with whatever that could. Whatever that looks like midnight. Not too firm, not too soft. Super soft. Firmer feeling. Whatever just right you want.

[Si Robertson]

That's right.

[Jase Robertson]

Because you took the quiz. And maybe you sleep on your back, maybe sleep on your side, maybe you sleep on your stomach. Maybe you don't know how you sleep.

[Si Robertson]

That's not.

[Jase Robertson]

You know, maybe you got to like, video yourself to figure out, make sure you don't fail the test. What. However you do it, Helix has got something for you. We've had our Helix mattresses for over three years now, and it has legit been the best sleep we have ever had. We've all got the Helix mattresses unashamed. Got them. Sadie's got one. They are seriously the best. Top notch, guaranteed.

[Phil Robertson]

Made for me.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, and with the new year starting, you're probably like following your health. And you got those trackers. Oh, look, just. You don't take. Don't take our word for it. Look at your sleep tracker. Whenever you do it with a Helix mattress, look how much better your sleep's going to be once you get one. Not only do you sleep better in general, you're going to notice less back pain, body ache, stiff muscles, whatever is bothering you when you wake up in the morning, when you wake up and go all those things, you ain't going to do that no more. They going to cure all that for you, Martin.

[Phil Robertson]

I slept for five hours and seven minutes last night and got a good sleep score. Because of just how good those five hours were.

[Jase Robertson]

There you go. You do notice it when you're traveling like we do. Traveling, duck hunting, everything. You just don't sleep as good when away from home. That's just part of it. You're not on your mattress because it conforms perfectly to your body. Cradles you when you're sleeping, so there's no more tossing and turning to get comfortable. Y'all know what to do. Go to helixsleep.com for 25% off site wide and two free dream pillows with your mattress purchase. That's helixsleep.com for 25 percent off sitewide, plus two free dream pillows with your Mattress purchase. Helixsleep.com Duck.

[Martin]

I think it's funny that Jace thinks that. Well, by the way, Jace owes $10 to who because, well, we put a group together from our poker friends and Al Said he was going to lose 60 by 60 and it was 3 to 1 odds on it. So if you put up saying Al would lose the weight, you got 30 bucks and you could own. There was a ten dollar max. And if you put.

[Phil Robertson]

He's trying to lose 60 pounds by.

[Martin]

The time he turns 60 and 60 is already hit.

[Phil Robertson]

I was about to say you got.

[Martin]

About 65 and we ain't seen Jace because he owes $10.

[Si Robertson]

That's right.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, he's already lost 60.

[Martin]

No, Jace has already lost 10.

[Jase Robertson]

No, but I'm saying Al's already lost 60 weight.

[Si Robertson]

He lost weight.

[Martin]

He didn't.

[Phil Robertson]

No, no, if Al's try to lose £60, he's got 65 to 70 to go.

[Si Robertson]

Well, hey, look, him and. Him and Lisa, okay, they went on the. What's was the diet one Golden Corral food. I don't know the name of. But anyway, they was on that and he.

[Martin]

Johnny Speeds.

[Si Robertson]

He lost.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, they bring you food, grub.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, Dominoes.

[Si Robertson]

Then look. Then he looked and said, wait a minute.

[Jase Robertson]

Door dash.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, wait a minute. Well, now let me go ahead and back. Go back to my regular living and eat good food again.

[Phil Robertson]

Al's birthday's in two days.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Martin]

Yeah. Well, he ain't gonna make the 60, you know.

[Jase Robertson]

And look, how much does he stand to make? Because I'm wondering if he'll lop off a leg or something.

[Martin]

No, no, Al's not in it. Still not in it.

[Phil Robertson]

Still wouldn't make it.

[Martin]

But I was not in. He didn't put any wager down to win, but it was three to one against him. And Jason said, oh, no, my brother can do it. He put his 10 bucks up. Gone.

[Phil Robertson]

My brother.

[Martin]

Oh, if he says he can do it, hey, he could do it. Hey, I'm on.

[Jase Robertson]

He believes that. He believes in our way more than he believes in Willie.

[Phil Robertson]

Now we're going down a road.

[Martin]

I'm going to invite him to the game. I'm going to send him a text today and say, don't be scared. Show up and I'll let you know what his response is.

[Phil Robertson]

Unashamed podcast. I'm just trying to find a recent photo of Al.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah, well, he's still healthy. Okay. Hey, I just, you know, he's.

[Martin]

He's getting more healthy, sir.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, he's healthy. He's healthy.

[Martin]

Is that him with the lipstick over there?

[Phil Robertson]

No, that's an ad.

[Si Robertson]

That's an ad.

[Jase Robertson]

When was that?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, that was three days ago.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, have y'all seen the latest Red.

[Jase Robertson]

Bull how did you pull that pause, though, where he's, like, feeling his nipp? I love it. He's, like, massaging his man breast.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm a man with a particular set of skills.

[Jase Robertson]

That was a good scrub to get to that right there.

[Phil Robertson]

I did. See? And I'm so upset with NBC right now, people.

[Si Robertson]

What did NBC do?

[Phil Robertson]

They have a new show coming out.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, what's the name of it?

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know, but it's like planet Earth. Oh, and I went to the movies last night. If your kid wants to go see Sonic the Hedgehog three, tell him to go with a friend because it was the worst thing I've ever been a part of. But aside from that.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, Hunter disagrees.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, Hunter drove to Austin to see Barbie, so we're.

[Hunter]

I haven't. Haven't seen it yet, but I really, really want to.

[Phil Robertson]

Hunter, it is terrible.

[Hunter]

Keanu Reeves is in it. It can't be bad.

[Phil Robertson]

No, it's bad.

[Jase Robertson]

No, that's the exact reason of why it can be.

[Phil Robertson]

It was so bad, it hurt.

[Si Robertson]

You heard it from the critics here.

[Phil Robertson]

It was an hour and 50 minutes of pain.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, pitiful.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, it was terror. And I've seen a lot of kids.

[Si Robertson]

Are you gonna send them a refund? I want my real free.

[Phil Robertson]

No, I ate enough popcorn to get my money's worth. Okay, but here' before it, they had a thing. It's like planet Earth. And they had a. The. You know, the narrators. Tom Hanks.

[Si Robertson]

Like, they're trying to copy pbs.

[Phil Robertson]

They are? Yes. And if they would have got psy to narrate this thing once again, it would have been the greatest hour of television in the history of television. And it's all I could think about.

[Jase Robertson]

But instead, they got Tom Hanks.

[Phil Robertson]

Said they got Tom Hanks.

[Si Robertson]

Look. Well, don't be bad. Old Tom Ike, he's all right.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. I mean, Forrest Gump was good.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah. But it's sad. I feel like we need to make our own planet Earth somehow.

[Si Robertson]

PBS done cover that boy.

[Jase Robertson]

That'd be Hunter. That's right.

[Phil Robertson]

No, but. But you narrate it. I just. It would make such magic in my eyes. We.

[Hunter]

We can do our own, Hunter.

[Martin]

There we go.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Hunter]

Like, I know how to do it.

[Si Robertson]

He knows how to do it, boys. He can do it.

[Phil Robertson]

I will support it however I can. But that upset me, too, at the movies last night. But they are having. You can go to the movies in, like, a week and bring whatever bucket you want, and they will fill it with popcorn for $5.

[Jase Robertson]

So, like, you can slide in there with a yeti bucket.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, I think they take a five gallon bucket.

[Martin]

A trash bag.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, me and Carter. Me and Carter about to roll up.

[Jase Robertson]

Do y'all sell yeti buckets at the honeyhole? Oh, how is this.

[Si Robertson]

Let's all go to the movie.

[Jase Robertson]

How is this not your next look?

[Si Robertson]

How let's take the whole crew to the movies with each one of us.

[Jase Robertson]

Got a five bucket does it. But then can you use anything as a bucket making it be. Can I total?

[Martin]

Oh, there's got to be some kind of.

[Jase Robertson]

And I tote like a 35 quart limit in there because it's got a strap and a hand.

[Phil Robertson]

There might have been a limit on it, but I don't think five gallons was the limit. Like, I think five gallon bucket. It checks out.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, you imagine sitting in there with a five gallon bucket in your lap?

[Phil Robertson]

Because they always do like the slushy thing. Nobody wants that.

[Jase Robertson]

No, that stuff's trash.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, that would be a pretty good promotional ad.

[Phil Robertson]

Bring your own popcorn.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, bring your own bucket for popcorn.

[Phil Robertson]

And Cinemark will fill it for $5. And look, last night on the way out the movies, I got that free refill in the double XL bucket that they had, and it's sitting on the counter right now of popcorn. And I'm gonna eat some tonight.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, I love popcorn.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, January 19th is bring your own bucket day.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, that's. Hey, that's pretty good marketing.

[Martin]

S. Let's do it.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm in.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, I like it.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, New year, new me, baby.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, you know what else is new? It ain't new because it's been out a while. But deodorant that you can put anywhere on your body, not just. There's it right here. Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Hits packages and feet.

[Jase Robertson]

There you go. And if you need your pits, packages or feet to smell like Mount Fuji, go ahead.

[Martin]

I got the bourbon leather.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, okay.

[Phil Robertson]

I got pro sport because I'm a pro sport.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, you, because you still on that pickleball bag. Here's why it works. It was created by a doctor who saw firsthand how normal BO was being misdiagnosed and mistreated. It's clinically proven to control odor for 72 hours by stopping odor at its source. Mando offers solid deodorant stick that will stop odor before it starts. And their spray deodorant is ideal for hard to reach places. All their products are baking soda free and paraben free. And you can choose from a variety of fresh scents.

[Phil Robertson]

A variety.

[Jase Robertson]

Bourbon, leather, clover woods. I ain't smelt the clover woods yet, but I'd love to smell that thing. Look.

[Martin]

Oh, I like that. Sigh. Smell this.

[Jase Robertson]

Look. Mando is clinically proven to control odor better than a shower. With soap alone. Twelve hours after a shower, the average man's grundle odor level was a 5 out of 10. But with Mando, the average grundle odor level is a 0 out of 10. And after five days of duck hunting in a row, it's a 10 out of 10. So I'm going home and using some mando because I ain't hunting tomorrow. If you want to try America's number one whole body deodorant formula right now, you can find them in Walmart, Target, and other retailers across the country. But for the best deals, go to shopmando.com and use the code duck. There you go. And look, you've heard all this. You're like, I don't know what to buy. I don't know what this. That. The other mando starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, and two free products of your choice, like a mini body wash or deodorant wipes. And free shipping as a special offer for listeners. New customers get $5 off a starter pack with our exclusive code that equates to over 40% off your starter pack. Use code [e-mail] S H O-P M A N D O.COM Please support our show and tell them we sent you smell fresher, stay dryer and boost your confidence from head to toe.

[Martin]

That's right.

[Jase Robertson]

With mando.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, no. Hey, you just reminded me 400 ounces. Go to the grocery store, Buy Fritos, large scoop fritos. You know what I'm talking about?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, yeah. Frito scoops.

[Si Robertson]

Okay? And then you buy you a pint of red salsa, okay. And eat the whole jar and the.

[Phil Robertson]

Whole package of fritos and salsa.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, I really prefer fritos or bean dip.

[Si Robertson]

But, dude, forget the beanie. Get your red salsa. Yeah, but I like to my made bought me that. And hey, I stood there and ate the whole pint and whole package.

[Jase Robertson]

What brand salsa?

[Si Robertson]

All I know is, hey, it's the red. Red. That's what it says on it. Get the red.

[Jase Robertson]

Get the red.

[Si Robertson]

And it's fine. It's got a little New York city. Exactly. Got a little heat to it. And I, I was just, I wasn't paying Attention. I opened them up, just started.

[Jase Robertson]

You do know we sell salsa here, right?

[Si Robertson]

No, I didn't.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, got your brother's picture on it.

[Phil Robertson]

Y'all sell salsa here?

[Martin]

Are you the only one that knows?

[Si Robertson]

Hey, on a scale 1 to 10, how is it?

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, it's good.

[Si Robertson]

Is it?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Why? I need to give me a job.

[Martin]

Take you some home today.

[Phil Robertson]

I love salsa.

[Jase Robertson]

No, it's good.

[Phil Robertson]

Salsa's like, hey, that's my snack.

[Jase Robertson]

Now is.

[Si Robertson]

Is the large scoop Fritos and then. And my pile of red sauce.

[Martin]

I know why he don't want to eat bean dip. The last time we stopped in the store and he ate bean dip with some of them Fritos, we had to institute the courtesy roll. That's when you hit the. Hit the window down about 2 inches. Wait for about 30 seconds.

[Jase Robertson]

Did you also buy the bean dip from the gas station?

[Martin]

Oh, this was years ago, but this is when we started the roll down. The courtesy roll. Because of the bean.

[Si Robertson]

No, you don't let down. You go ahead and roll the winner down.

[Martin]

It was awful.

[Si Robertson]

Leave it down for a while.

[Phil Robertson]

Are you talking about, like, this kind of bean dip?

[Martin]

Yes.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, no, no. Oh, I love it.

[Martin]

Yeah, it was something like. It was something like that from a gas station. I love probably a no.

[Jase Robertson]

I love that Frito's hot bean dip. Oh, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

I'm against y'all in every way.

[Jase Robertson]

It's so good.

[Phil Robertson]

You're against this. Sigh freedom.

[Si Robertson]

Probably. I never ate it.

[Martin]

I don't like being he ate something like it.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, man, I do love hot bean dip. I do.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, it's gotta have a little heat.

[Jase Robertson]

It's just refried beans is good because.

[Si Robertson]

It'S got a little heat to good.

[Jase Robertson]

I mean, it's legit. Just refried bean.

[Phil Robertson]

I do love a refried bean.

[Si Robertson]

Matter of fact, next time I come up here, I'm going to have my red sauce and my.

[Jase Robertson]

I've never had a. I've never had.

[Martin]

During the podcast.

[Jase Robertson]

You ever had a fried.

[Si Robertson]

I'll eat the whole jar.

[Martin]

To put your mic straight.

[Si Robertson]

I eat a whole jar. I'm serious.

[Phil Robertson]

What's that, Martin?

[Jase Robertson]

I was wondering if you've ever had a fried bean. I've only had them refried. I don't know why.

[Martin]

A one fry.

[Jase Robertson]

You know what?

[Phil Robertson]

I made refried beans homemade one time.

[Jase Robertson]

How you do that?

[Phil Robertson]

The pioneer woman.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And I never fried the bean, but I did reframe somehow.

[Jase Robertson]

Really?

[Si Robertson]

I don't know why you refried bean hunters.

[Jase Robertson]

That's something that you would Know why are they called refried beans? I was just curious.

[Phil Robertson]

I made them from scratch and they were awesome.

[Jase Robertson]

Were they?

[Phil Robertson]

And it was a lot of work.

[Si Robertson]

Was it the pinto bean?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, you start. You start with pintos. Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Well, I know, but, hey, some of them use in black beans.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, that's black beans because you basically just boil beans.

[Si Robertson]

I don't like black.

[Jase Robertson]

So should they be called reboiled beans?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

And then you mash the beans, and.

[Si Robertson]

That'S pretty baby food.

[Martin]

Now.

[Phil Robertson]

Now the Pioneer PDubs shout out to Ray Drummond. She does put bacon in the pot that they're boiling in.

[Si Robertson]

Everything goes better with bacon, baby.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, so that's interesting.

[Phil Robertson]

So that's gotta, like, add some fat, so it could be fine.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. But I've just always wondered why they were called re. Refried. Because they were never, to my knowledge, fried in the first place, so. That's right, refried.

[Si Robertson]

Why?

[Phil Robertson]

It seems like refried beans comes from the Spanish phrase frijoles refritos in Spanish.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh. So some American didn't know how to.

[Phil Robertson]

Speak Spanish means to fry. And so some old boy in Texas heard him say, ray Fritos. And he said, oh, y'all refried them.

[Martin]

And us refried beans, we figured it out.

[Phil Robertson]

That's it. And if it's not true, never tell me, because I'm living by that for the rest of my life.

[Martin]

It's never twice fried.

[Si Robertson]

What we're going with.

[Phil Robertson]

It's refritos, Reese.

[Si Robertson]

Fritos.

[Jase Robertson]

That's interesting.

[Phil Robertson]

I want Spanish food tonight.

[Jase Robertson]

S. I feel like you need to know this too. That way next time you run into Stone and Jace, the two guys that say you never kill anything.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

And that also never miss. Yeah. I watched them shoot a box of shells to try to recreate your croak hill today.

[Phil Robertson]

Couldn't do it, could they?

[Jase Robertson]

No. I mean, Stone finally got it done there to bitter end. But no, why?

[Si Robertson]

They was way out too far.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, too far out in front.

[Si Robertson]

You know, usually when you miss, you shot behind him. He's flying too fast. Okay. They were moving. They went out too far. Because when I killed that CO op 70 when we were duck hunting, I just let him. And I was yelling. Then I just put it right on that head, pulled the trigger.

[Jase Robertson]

Bop dead.

[Si Robertson]

He fold.

[Martin]

And then they tried to do it and couldn't.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, just know they shot a box of shells today trying to do what you did.

[Phil Robertson]

So I'm telling you, it was. It was over a decade ago. I saw him fold up a crow.

[Jase Robertson]

And I Said thanks for the podcast material.

[Si Robertson]

No, no, I. Look, crow when the ducks are not flying. The last thing a crow wants to do is fly in front of the duck. He's fixing to get killed if he does. Okay.

[Martin]

There's lava.

[Si Robertson]

I'm mad to begin with because ain't no duck flying.

[Martin]

It's probably unsafe for a lot of different birds.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, no. Yeah, yeah. If there ain't no ducks flying, you fly. Don't fly in front of the duck lines, because me and Song. Here's one of them. Do not do.

[Martin]

Yeah. Do not tell.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. No, no, you do not do. Do not go to the marsh to duck hunt and then shoot a seagull.

[Martin]

No, don't ever do that.

[Si Robertson]

Don't ever do that.

[Martin]

It's a big, big fine if you do.

[Si Robertson]

Well, not only that. Okay. If you shoot one. Well, guess what? When he falls, here comes 1000 more because they think he's found bait fish. Allegedly.

[Phil Robertson]

Allegedly.

[Jase Robertson]

Allegedly.

[Si Robertson]

Allegedly.

[Phil Robertson]

That happened to me at the beach because I dropped some Fritos.

[Si Robertson]

Okay. Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

You got attacked, and then seagulls came from everywhere.

[Martin]

They followed you all day?

[Si Robertson]

No, no, they had. By me. Sea captain. Okay. He does it for a living. He's out, you know, with his people that hired him to take them fishing. Well, he's got this stupid seagull that always finds him wherever he's at. How cool is that? He's got his own seagull that actually comes and lands on the boat to be fed.

[Martin]

Wow.

[Jase Robertson]

Same one.

[Si Robertson]

Same one.

[Phil Robertson]

How do we know a seagull's the same? Like, unless you're Noah and on a boat and you're releasing them out, you don't know it's the same one.

[Si Robertson]

They've got pictures of him. It's the same. The same seagull. And my question is, how does he know where he's going?

[Phil Robertson]

Same way that and be.

[Si Robertson]

And be able to find him out on the ocean.

[Phil Robertson]

His name was Noah. He released the dove, and it came right back. This is the same one.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. I was going to say live scope, but I don't know.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, radar, Radar, Radar, baby.

[Jase Robertson]

It's like radar love about it.

[Si Robertson]

Radar love, man.

[Martin]

I love what.

[Si Robertson]

But how cool would that be? Have your own seagull always follow you out of an ocean and land. Don't be fed.

[Phil Robertson]

I feel like if you had a bird, it would be more like of a parrot. Situation apparent. How cool would it be if Psy like Coco Beware had a parrot?

[Hunter]

You can. You can teach crows to speak. And he spoke crows Are really, really smart too.

[Si Robertson]

All the languages.

[Phil Robertson]

And Psy kills him.

[Jase Robertson]

That one yesterday, wasn't it.

[Si Robertson]

And he smoked. He smoked.

[Martin]

He smoked in three languages.

[Si Robertson]

No, no, he. And he spoke all the language.

[Phil Robertson]

Y'all remember Coco Beware. I just think it would be super tight if. If Psy had a parrot like Coco Beware did.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, hey, them say had a macaw.

[Si Robertson]

All that macaw. Hey, he'll cut you with his feet. They're mean.

[Phil Robertson]

But like, if you had one, that was your friend. And it like, hurt me every day.

[Jase Robertson]

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[Phil Robertson]

You know how I got my sister Neutrophil, because she always.

[Jase Robertson]

She's fired up when she.

[Phil Robertson]

She always. She was fired up. Yeah, but she always heard Britt, you talking about it with Brittany. She's a twin mom. Over the. She's had it for a while now. Over Christmas, my dad looked at her and said, your hair's getting fuller. It's obvious to other people. That's how good it is.

[Jase Robertson]

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[Martin]

Alicia's doing it. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

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[Si Robertson]

Duck.

[Jase Robertson]

Find out why over 4,500 healthcare professionals and stylists recommend Neutropol for healthier hair. Nutrifol.com spelled N u t r a f o l.com promo code one more time, that's nutrafold.com promo code.

[Martin]

Sigh. You can go to the Monroe Zoo, Louisiana Purchase Gardens and Zoo and go into where they have a huge bird cage and they give you seed on a stick. You walk in and hundreds of birds just surround you and start eating that seed off the stick.

[Jase Robertson]

Like home alone.

[Phil Robertson]

Term 20s.

[Martin]

I don't know, maybe 100 total.

[Phil Robertson]

Maybe 100.

[Martin]

But I got some video of it. It's pretty cool.

[Jase Robertson]

It's.

[Phil Robertson]

It's not.

[Martin]

I like that.

[Si Robertson]

I'd be fine.

[Martin]

They get caught in your beard, though.

[Jase Robertson]

That'd be you hold it in your teeth.

[Martin]

My kids, like, they can shoot it through the bottle.

[Phil Robertson]

My kids have done that.

[Jase Robertson]

So I would look like that old chick off home alone.

[Martin]

Your kids have done that?

[Phil Robertson]

Have done the Monroe Zoo with the birds thing? Yeah.

[Martin]

Was it. Did they like it? Yeah, but they're spoiled. They go to all these other big zoos. Well, they say the laugh Hunter. Hunter's laughing.

[Si Robertson]

Well, no, no. They told me dope.

[Martin]

Johnny D from the mic.

[Phil Robertson]

Bad mouth. The Monroe Zoo, they're doing all they can.

[Si Robertson]

They vote graded to zoo.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Martin]

They really have. Seriously, it's better, in my opinion. I think they're trying to make it better. It's. It doesn't. Still doesn't compare to some of the other big zoos.

[Phil Robertson]

Make the Monroe Zoo great.

[Jase Robertson]

Not again. Because it hadn't happened yet.

[Phil Robertson]

No. Back in the gap. It was pretty good.

[Jase Robertson]

Now we just didn't know no better. Like then you go to another one, you're like, all right, this kind of.

[Phil Robertson]

The only thing I'll say about the Monroe Zoo is they have a black panther there.

[Si Robertson]

Hey.

[Martin]

Side that solidarity.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, no, no. Because that's what, what all the type animals do they have at the zoo in Monroe. They got a black panther. We know that they have a black.

[Phil Robertson]

Panther and some small birds. Yeah, birds.

[Martin]

At least 100.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, they got a hippo.

[Phil Robertson]

There's a hippo.

[Martin]

Alligators, albino alligators.

[Phil Robertson]

They had A big old deer last time I was there. That's not going to look good on a wall.

[Jase Robertson]

A deer?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh yeah.

[Martin]

They got a train deer and a boat. You take a boat ride and train ride.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, you got both.

[Martin]

Our train and a train.

[Si Robertson]

Both, yeah. Oh well I got a Bengal tiger.

[Phil Robertson]

They got a Bengal tiger. He swims a lot.

[Martin]

The tortoise is over 100 years old.

[Si Robertson]

Monkeys.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, hey, where the.

[Phil Robertson]

Now the zoo is that? The zoo went down for a minute and I will say new mayor of Monroe is doing everything he can to make the zoo great.

[Si Robertson]

Look.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah town you know or a town our size. We got a great zoo.

[Si Robertson]

I'm fix. They got a nice.

[Martin]

There you go Johnny. Finding something good.

[Si Robertson]

I fixate. It's a decent zoo for our size of our town.

[Jase Robertson]

If you want to see more wildlife in this town, you show up at that place right down the road called the arena on Friday night. You see all kind of wildlife there.

[Martin]

That's where I gave them guys the right hunter. I had a bunch of people following me to size house and I gave them the slip. Right there, the Arena.

[Jase Robertson]

He went in there and shot you a few games. Did you?

[Phil Robertson]

What is the arena?

[Jase Robertson]

Hello, Hall. Right down the road there.

[Martin]

Hey.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, on this side of the river.

[Si Robertson]

Okay.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Martin]

Seriously.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, you'll see something.

[Martin]

You would be surprised at how good sai can play pool. I was shocked. I'm not kidding. So you must have played a lot of pool in the military. To be honest I did because you play really good.

[Si Robertson]

The biggest amount of money I wanted, I won $266 at a pool. Pool game.

[Martin]

Yeah, but how, how long ago was that?

[Si Robertson]

I'll go 40 years.

[Martin]

So that's like winning 2,000.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah. And hey, guess what I did. You paid rent, went to Walmart, bought me a big tackle box, fill it full of bait, bought me a rod and reel.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, the honey hole was open, I'm sure.

[Phil Robertson]

Oh no, hey, no we weren't.

[Si Robertson]

Not in $1966 at Walmart. For fishing.

[Jase Robertson]

For fishing.

[Si Robertson]

It went fishing.

[Martin]

I had a true fan.

[Phil Robertson]

It's not even. It's not even the fact that it's not that it's somewhere. It's the fact that it's Walmart.

[Si Robertson]

Oh wait a minute now. Don't bad mouth Walmart. Watch me there. The cable guy.

[Martin]

Pop him. Sigh. Pop him. He won't.

[Phil Robertson]

Larry the Cable guy did not make Walmart.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, he did.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, Sam Walton made Walmart famous.

[Si Robertson]

Oh no, no. Larry the Cable guy made it famous.

[Jase Robertson]

Really?

[Phil Robertson]

I have no idea. What he's talking.

[Jase Robertson]

Interesting take. Yeah, I don't know.

[Phil Robertson]

It is normally me and you versus the world over here, sir, but you and your Walmart.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm not sure how Larry the Cable Guy helped Walmart because he.

[Si Robertson]

He doesn't hurt it about it.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, Doug Dynasty helped Walmart.

[Si Robertson]

All right, there you go. Hey, we have the boy.

[Phil Robertson]

Couldn't hurt it.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, I mean, I haven't been in.

[Phil Robertson]

Walmart's fishing section in decades.

[Jase Robertson]

Me, I don't even know where it is in the layout now.

[Phil Robertson]

It's got to be to the right still, huh?

[Jase Robertson]

I ended up at that big Walmart during Christmas break now.

[Phil Robertson]

Did you really?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. And I hurt you. Oh, I had to go get the boys some stuff.

[Phil Robertson]

I gotta say, I badmouth Walmart a lot, but that I. I'm a yearly member of. We will deliver whatever you want to your house.

[Jase Robertson]

Are you on that Walmart plus bag?

[Phil Robertson]

Oh, it's one of the best things ever.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, what do you want to eat tonight? I don't know. Let me type in my phone all the ingredients and then somebody's just going to drop them off on my porch. The future's bright.

[Jase Robertson]

I'm saying that somebody's. Hunter, by the way, that's your light shine.

[Si Robertson]

Are you a Walmart delivery guy?

[Hunter]

I am not.

[Jase Robertson]

He moonlights as a Walmart delivery.

[Phil Robertson]

I know a guy that does that. He makes good money.

[Hunter]

I. I like doing things myself. Something about me going to the store and getting it myself is.

[Jase Robertson]

No, I'm talking about you. Just the delivery driver. No, you'd be a good pizza delivery guy.

[Hunter]

I. I'm an anxious driver. I would turn down the wrong streets a lot.

[Jase Robertson]

You're anxious? Really?

[Martin]

You need to ride with Psy about.

[Jase Robertson]

The frozen guy behind the computer's anxious.

[Phil Robertson]

You nervous himself over there.

[Jase Robertson]

The man whose voice always quivers when he starts talking. You're anxious. I'm just trying to help you.

[Si Robertson]

He has anxiety attacks.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't think he does.

[Jase Robertson]

Is that part of being a twin? Am I going to have to deal with that? Or is that just.

[Si Robertson]

I don't.

[Hunter]

I have no idea.

[Jase Robertson]

Or is that part of being raised down there on the riverbank?

[Hunter]

I was raised in Rustin. I was bullied a lot growing up. I blame that, usually.

[Phil Robertson]

Who bullied you?

[Si Robertson]

Everybody.

[Phil Robertson]

To me now.

[Si Robertson]

Everybody.

[Jase Robertson]

Wow. You're definitely one of the coolest people I've ever met. From Ruston then. I didn't realize that.

[Phil Robertson]

So by far.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

I will hurt somebody for you, Hunter.

[Hunter]

Thanks.

[Phil Robertson]

Hey, look at me. Look at the camera.

[Jase Robertson]

He'll hurt somebody for you. He means he'll get the fight started and he'll be nowhere to be found.

[Phil Robertson]

But that fight will be a good one.

[Si Robertson]

Don't touch him.

[Martin]

That's right.

[Hunter]

But that's why I never did any sort of delivery thing. I thought about it like during COVID and stuff.

[Phil Robertson]

But no, that's a good job because you can do your regular job and then like in the evening go like for four hours and just deliver people stuff.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, I figured that would be like, as a single guy, like rent and all the things. I mean, I figured that's like a 6 to 10pm job that. That probably pays decent or something. Like if.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, no, it's good.

[Jase Robertson]

I have an easy hustle. Yeah, you get tips?

[Hunter]

Well, I just photograph weddings and film weddings. Right now. That's how I'm making extra money.

[Si Robertson]

That's a good.

[Martin]

I'm glad you're doing that, honey.

[Phil Robertson]

I like side gigs.

[Jase Robertson]

That's enough to make anybody's foot shake like yours is right now.

[Hunter]

No, that would be the Celsius I trained.

[Jase Robertson]

I mean, that. That back foot over there, bumper. He just put both of them on the ground because I called it out. That back foot over there was going like 100 RPM.

[Phil Robertson]

There's nothing wrong with being a little jittery. I was recently in a wedding, and I wish Hunter would have been there to photograph it because he would have kept the camera on. How much? I couldn't stand still. I got down after the wedding. My mom goes, you can't sit still, can you? I was like, no, it was like a 10 minute wedding. How was I supposed to stand there that long?

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

I move a lot, is what I've been told.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, say I do and then kiss the road.

[Jase Robertson]

You're. You're a fidgeter.

[Phil Robertson]

I will say. You know, my cousin Heath, he's been on the show once. He performed the wedding. Oh, greatest.

[Jase Robertson]

As the minister or. Oh, he was the opening act.

[Phil Robertson]

No, he was the whole. He was the whole shebang.

[Si Robertson]

He is.

[Phil Robertson]

Let me tell you something. I think it was eight minutes. He did the whole thing. The bride and groom said, hey, we want this quick. We just want to have a ceremony. Say something.

[Jase Robertson]

He.

[Phil Robertson]

So he got there, he said, I got advice from the Bible. Here it is. And here's advice from me. Y'all ready? I do. I do. Kiss her. Let's go. It was. Everybody, like, cheered. Not for the people getting married. For Heath, it was so good and fast.

[Jase Robertson]

That's awesome.

[Si Robertson]

There you go. Don't waste time.

[Martin]

Get a comedian to do your wedding.

[Si Robertson]

It's.

[Phil Robertson]

It's wisdom.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Anyways.

[Jase Robertson]

Interesting.

[Phil Robertson]

Hunter, I will gladly perform your wedding one day. And I will keep it below 10 minutes.

[Hunter]

If I ever get married, I'll let you do it.

[Si Robertson]

Okay.

[Phil Robertson]

Okay. That is the binding law. Agreement.

[Si Robertson]

That's right, Verbal.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, I guess that leaves me to be his best man. Since you got to perform that.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

As a man who was recently a best man. That is way more expensive. I get to wear whatever.

[Jase Robertson]

I bet. Here's all I'll tell you. I bet mine and Hunter's party a little wilder than yours. I ain't saying I'm gonna be there, but I'll throw him a good party.

[Hunter]

So I would love it if you were my ring bear.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, I'll be it.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, wouldn't that be funny?

[Si Robertson]

Hey.

[Jase Robertson]

And Christine, the flower girl.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

Boy, I feel like if that flamer.

[Si Robertson]

Red hair.

[Phil Robertson]

If this new old girlfriend finds out about this, we might be in trouble. So don't tell her until y'all are.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, yeah. She gonna run for the hills.

[Phil Robertson]

She should.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

If size your ring bearer, I think it'd be cool. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Sigh With a monkey. Like, sigh. Walking down the aisle with an orangutan. And they're both. One of them's holding his rings. One of them's holding the other one.

[Martin]

On her special day. This is what y'all are planning. Hunter, don't do none of this, boy.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, Hunter. Have you got an interesting wedding coming up, boy.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah. Hey, right outside of our memories, we can do it.

[Hunter]

I never wanted a normal wedding.

[Martin]

Six months. If y'all do it that way.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Our friends over at Soft hold are back. And that is a cool thing because look how strong that magnet is.

[Phil Robertson]

They're legit. Yeah, they'll hold your gun, but they're a lot of fun to play with, too.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

That thing just pulled that bell up from far away.

[Jase Robertson]

Amen. But look, when it comes to hunting accessories, things should be simple, tough, and built to last. And that's what our friends over at Soft hold have done. Soft hold gun mounts are handmade in America. Solid, reliable, American craftsmanship you can count on. These gun mounts are wrapped in premium leather, so it looks good. And it's going to keep your gun safe from dings and scratches. And like Johnny D just said, it has a 50 pound magnetic pull. It's strong enough to yank a frying pan off the stove. So long, gun, shotguns or pistols, it doesn't matter. These mounts will hold any gun you own. You can mount them anywhere your truck, side by side. Hunting, blind, tractor, gun, safe, it doesn't matter. Softhold keeps your gun right where you want it. And Softhold's got a grip that won't let go until you want it to. Even when you're bouncing down those old dirt roads or even the Louisiana paved ones. So Softhold is premium American made gear that's built to last without blowing your hunting budget. And if you run a business and you're tired of handing out the same old hats, pins and mugs to your clients for Christmas, it's time to switch it up. This year, ditch the stuff no one needs and give them something useful. Soft holds custom gun mounts wrapped in leather with your business logo right on them. Plus, they'll get your order out in time for Christmas. Look. And you're wondering what it looks like. Here you go. Look at there. Duck call room.

[Phil Robertson]

Right on a. Yeah, yeah, I got that option. Custom logo on their website.

[Jase Robertson]

There you go. Look. Size. Taking yours. He likes it so much.

[Phil Robertson]

He said strong.

[Jase Robertson]

Put them anywhere. Oh, watch your finger. Watch your finger.

[Si Robertson]

Old man comes up, don't it?

[Jase Robertson]

I guarantee you it is a strong magnet. Secure your stuff whether it's a blind, your truck, four wheeler doesn't matter. Save 10 when you use code [e-mail] today. Bulk and wholesale pricing available. Contact John [e-mail]. that's S O F H O L D dot com. There's no T in there. S o f h hold dot com. And when you use code doc, you'll save 10 off your order. Oh, man. John D. We got anything? I feel vindicated in an inbot. What happened?

[Phil Robertson]

Just so Matt Walsh just tweeted about Sonic the Hedgehog three being maybe the worst thing he's ever seen in his life. I'm telling you, it's terrible. Anyway, did you go over?

[Jase Robertson]

You ever go see Moana too?

[Phil Robertson]

I haven't seen it yet.

[Jase Robertson]

Okay.

[Phil Robertson]

Or Mufasa.

[Jase Robertson]

Mufasa.

[Phil Robertson]

I literally. One of Ben's friends was at the movie and he was like, I'm going to see Mufasa. And I was like, big Mac. Tell you what, you go with Ben's and I'm going to go.

[Si Robertson]

Your parents should have learned from going from the movies. Remember, we started this out with appreciation day.

[Martin]

Tell him.

[Phil Robertson]

Sign April 27th sandwiches.

[Si Robertson]

Okay. That's what this should teach you. Okay? You got to learn to appreciate a good movie when you see one.

[Phil Robertson]

And we got to learn to Warn the world about bad movies with food. There's two different Jim Carrey.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, you gotta have the critic. Okay. You gotta have the critic.

[Jase Robertson]

The only thing I know about Sonic the Hedgehog is in Boys.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, hold it. They make a good hamburger cheeseburger. Look. And Sonic also makes a nice milkshake.

[Martin]

That's appreciation. Hey.

[Si Robertson]

And that's appreciation.

[Phil Robertson]

Best thing Sonic ever did, hamburgers.

[Si Robertson]

And I appreciate their strawberry shake.

[Phil Robertson]

And them two dudes in the commercial from back in the day are funnier than both. Jim Carrey's in that new movie.

[Si Robertson]

That's it. There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

That's enough. Jim Carrey done with you.

[Si Robertson]

Now. What did the guy say?

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah, he said the movie was terrible.

[Phil Robertson]

It's terrible. It's terrible. Okay, but bring your own popcorn.

[Si Robertson]

We got JD Being agreed with. The movie was horrible. Don't go see it.

[Phil Robertson]

Don't go see it.

[Si Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Hunter, play us a voicemail. Hunter said when I came in, he goes, I found nine really good voicemails.

[Jase Robertson]

Nine.

[Phil Robertson]

Nine. So I'm very excited. I mean, we're not gonna get through nine today.

[Si Robertson]

I'll fix that. We ain't gonna be able to handle it.

[Phil Robertson]

Although I have one email. Are you ready, Hunter, or should I do this email?

[Si Robertson]

He said thumbs up on me.

[Phil Robertson]

Not a yes or I asked you either or thumbs up.

[Hunter]

Are you ready for the email?

[Phil Robertson]

Okay, Jenna, 19, from Ohio. She needs relationship this advice. I had this guy, like, we don't talk much. I want to find a way to reach out to him that doesn't seem awkward. What do you suggest I do? Hit her with it? Si.

[Si Robertson]

Me?

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, look, Gina, you grab this clown and, hey, you put one on him. No, I mean, hey, no. You kiss this dude like you ain't never kissed nobody before.

[Jase Robertson]

No.

[Si Robertson]

And I guarantee you after that, he'll talk to you.

[Phil Robertson]

Well, yeah.

[Si Robertson]

There's my take on that, baby.

[Phil Robertson]

All right, Jenna, Good luck.

[Martin]

Well, there you go.

[Phil Robertson]

Maybe just walk up and say something else, but. Or kiss him. Your choice. Hey, I'm terrified.

[Martin]

Make him laugh.

[Si Robertson]

I'm all for love, baby.

[Martin]

Just make him laugh. You know? Hey, spend some time with him.

[Jase Robertson]

Martin's.

[Martin]

Martin's done.

[Phil Robertson]

I said just walk up and lay one on him. Tongue down his throat.

[Si Robertson]

That's right.

[Jase Robertson]

Hunter, what would you do? No, you've never. You've never. No, I'm. No, I'm saying you've never met this. Or you rarely talk to this chick, whoever she is. She just walks up to you and kisses you right in the Mouth, that.

[Hunter]

Happened to me once.

[Si Robertson]

Hey.

[Martin]

Oh.

[Hunter]

Believe it or not.

[Si Robertson]

Believe it or not.

[Phil Robertson]

And I'm gonna say not, but.

[Hunter]

And I didn't want to talk to her ever again.

[Jase Robertson]

All right, Jenna, don't treat your grandmother that way. That's not nice.

[Martin]

That ain't right. That ain't right. But it's funny.

[Phil Robertson]

That was good, Mark.

[Jase Robertson]

You ran away.

[Hunter]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Why I would run away?

[Hunter]

Because that. That was. Unless it was that strong.

[Jase Robertson]

And how old were you?

[Hunter]

18, 19.

[Si Robertson]

That.

[Jase Robertson]

Okay, how old was she?

[Hunter]

18, I think.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, yeah. Y'all just remind me my first day at school.

[Martin]

Uh. Oh. Somebody held you down and kissed you.

[Si Robertson]

No, the opposite. I had this fine little girl that I'm in love with. Hey. I grabbed her, kissed her, and my sister had to pull us apart.

[Phil Robertson]

Times were different back then.

[Si Robertson]

Oh. Oh, no. Hey.

[Phil Robertson]

You would be in jail if you were in.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, hold on. Hey.

[Martin]

So I was a smooth talker.

[Phil Robertson]

You would be on Fox News.

[Jase Robertson]

God, Cy Robertson didn't have tinder.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, I was always for love.

[Jase Robertson]

I mean, he.

[Phil Robertson]

They'd swipe. I don't even know the direction.

[Jase Robertson]

I don't either, but was it left or right, Hunter?

[Hunter]

Right.

[Phil Robertson]

Okay.

[Jase Robertson]

I'd be swiping right everywhere.

[Phil Robertson]

Is that the good one?

[Hunter]

Yes.

[Phil Robertson]

Hunter said yes.

[Si Robertson]

Hey. Love makes the world go round.

[Martin]

You appreciate.

[Jase Robertson]

Hey, look, now I'm curious about Hunters. Tender.

[Si Robertson]

I show appreciation.

[Hunter]

Not good.

[Si Robertson]

Hey.

[Jase Robertson]

Not good. Did you ever, like, see a 40 year old on there and you just shot your shot like. No.

[Hunter]

You can set the age limit.

[Jase Robertson]

Why would you wear.

[Martin]

Where's your age limit?

[Hunter]

Oh, he's talking about me. We're talking about Jenna.

[Jase Robertson]

No, you're. You're not.

[Si Robertson]

Oh, he talk about Jenna.

[Phil Robertson]

We can talk about Jenna and you, Hunter.

[Martin]

Ow.

[Phil Robertson]

She's only from Ohio.

[Jase Robertson]

Well, she ought to be happy. Her buckeyes are doing good. There you go.

[Phil Robertson]

Anyways, that was wild. Don't kiss him.

[Si Robertson]

Hey, yeah, you do.

[Jase Robertson]

Or do.

[Si Robertson]

Look, kiss him until he just passes out.

[Jase Robertson]

But I'm telling you, if he's a nervous little guy with a tick like my man over here shaking his foot, apparently that method doesn't work.

[Martin]

I say get to know him and make him laugh.

[Jase Robertson]

He's a guy riddled with anxiety from too many energy drinks. Don't try that. That's all I can say.

[Phil Robertson]

If he's drinking water, you might can try it. If he's got a high caffeine. If it says 18 plus on the can. Don't. Don't kiss him. It would freak him out.

[Martin]

That's that getting to know him part?

[Jase Robertson]

Golly.

[Hunter]

I. I agree with you, Philip. I think if she also.

[Phil Robertson]

Why can't you say Jenna?

[Martin]

What'd you say? Hunter?

[Hunter]

I. I agree with you. Like, get to know him, make him laugh. But I think she can also, like, ask him out herself. Just go for it.

[Phil Robertson]

You're the woman. You have all the power.

[Hunter]

Yes.

[Martin]

Yeah. Hey, let's look at Hunter. Let's go to Sonic.

[Phil Robertson]

They're going to say yes.

[Si Robertson]

There you go.

[Hunter]

Great Waffle House. Great place to ask someone out.

[Martin]

Waffle House. There you go. Waffle House cures all right.

[Si Robertson]

It is. Waffle House is friendly and the atmosphere is right. It's good food.

[Phil Robertson]

Kind of like people. Hunter, you got a voicemail for us?

[Hunter]

I do.

[Martin]

Hey, my name is Casey, sitting here with my son Axel, who's about the.

[Phil Robertson]

Age of your sons.

[Jase Robertson]

Martin.

[Martin]

Anyway, we were curious what.

[Jase Robertson]

What kind of shows your little ones are into.

[Martin]

Give you time to guess where.

[Phil Robertson]

Sonic the Hedgehog.

[Jase Robertson]

No, they're. What do the boys want?

[Martin]

Wait, wait, wait.

[Hunter]

You want to guess where he's from?

[Phil Robertson]

There's no way to guess. Where.

[Jase Robertson]

Indiana.

[Phil Robertson]

Yeah, he's very standard. Ohio. Indiana.

[Hunter]

You want me to play it?

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Hunter]

All right.

[Phil Robertson]

Wisconsin.

[Martin]

Originally.

[Jase Robertson]

Living in Kentucky now.

[Martin]

Thanks.

[Jase Robertson]

You average that out, you get Indiana.

[Phil Robertson]

Great job. Martin wins.

[Si Robertson]

Right in between.

[Jase Robertson]

Now the boys watch. What is that? They watch Number Blocks on Netflix.

[Phil Robertson]

Number Blocks is a good one.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, they like that. There's some other one on Netflix that.

[Phil Robertson]

Britney Ben's watch Number Blocks and he has never missed a question in math.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Ever. He's in the third grade.

[Jase Robertson]

They've recently taken a liking to Paw patrol and Rubble and Crew. So dogs with construction equipment. Like. Yeah. Who doesn't like their boys? Right?

[Phil Robertson]

I will give a shout out for when they're older. The Dude Perfect app.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah.

[Phil Robertson]

Is what my boys are allowed to watch because I can walk away and know they're not going to see anything. YouTube can be scary. You don't know what's coming next.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, and with the Christmas. The holidays over, they really took a liking to the animated Grinch too, which, thank goodness, That's a really good one. That's. That's like my favorite Grinch movie. But.

[Phil Robertson]

But the Dude Perfect app is safe for kids older than y'all.

[Jase Robertson]

But they don't watch tv. I mean, they don't very.

[Phil Robertson]

Kids are outside killing things.

[Jase Robertson]

They are very much into trucks looking at crows. Trucks and fist fights. That's what they're into.

[Si Robertson]

That's what's into.

[Jase Robertson]

Or not red fist fights. Just headbutting each other.

[Phil Robertson]

That's what my daughter's into, is fist fights.

[Jase Robertson]

Yeah, yeah. They'll get there. They'll graduate to that, I'm sure.

[Phil Robertson]

Boys are like, why is she hitting us? Get her back.

[Jase Robertson]

Why is she so mean? One more. Uno mas unamasu. What's going on, boys? Is that Phil?

[Martin]

And this question is for John David.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, thank God.

[Phil Robertson]

No.

[Martin]

You're constantly wearing that watch on your.

[Jase Robertson]

Wrist and know that it is a Rolex. And I want to say you said from your grandfather.

[Si Robertson]

My question is kind of personal.

[Martin]

Do you wear that Rolex because it's.

[Jase Robertson]

A Rolex or do you wear it.

[Martin]

Because it's a family heirloom from your grandfather and or both calling out a Davenport, Iowa, but originally from Tennessee. Y'all have a good one.

[Phil Robertson]

That's a weird question.

[Jase Robertson]

And why you wear your watch?

[Martin]

Why you wear it?

[Phil Robertson]

Because it's cool as crap, man.

[Martin]

That's all you got to say?

[Phil Robertson]

Actually, this is my grandpa's wedding ring that he wore for 50 years. So I wear that more about that. And then I have two watches, if you must know. The other one fancier than the one I have on now. Both. The other one was actually my papa's watch. This one a guy bought from my papa because he owned a jewelry store. And then I ended up with it somehow, some way.

[Jase Robertson]

So you got two Rolexes.

[Phil Robertson]

I didn't say what the other one was.

[Jase Robertson]

You said fancier. But I don't know how it gets fancier.

[Martin]

It's more fancy.

[Phil Robertson]

I don't know. He owned a jewelry store. It's weird. I had a queen sized bed.

[Jase Robertson]

What's the other one? Is it a Rolex? Yeah, but a tighter one. Like a. Like what color is it?

[Si Robertson]

A little more expensive.

[Jase Robertson]

What color is it?

[Phil Robertson]

Not a little.

[Jase Robertson]

No, I know that. Well, if it was his, it's gold. Go. Oh, like yellow gold.

[Phil Robertson]

It ain't got no numbers on it.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh, that's tight. You gotta wear a chain or you wear that.

[Phil Robertson]

No, you gotta have like get nervous. Somebody cut your hand off if you wear that one. Yeah.

[Jase Robertson]

Okay.

[Phil Robertson]

My favorite part is that Willie makes fun of me all the time for stuff like this.

[Jase Robertson]

What's that to Rolexes?

[Phil Robertson]

All of it.

[Jase Robertson]

Oh.

[Phil Robertson]

And then he's like, you know what I'm gonna do with my life? Spend all of it just to move to the street I grew up on. Thank you Anyways.

[Si Robertson]

Oh. What you got first, Jayden?

[Phil Robertson]

I have no idea. Now it's will feel bizarre.

[Si Robertson]

I thought you had something I did.

[Phil Robertson]

But now I'm confused because I got a very weird question.

[Martin]

What time is it?

[Phil Robertson]

Rolex. I don't even know how to read this watch. It has to be digital for me to read, but watch this. We're just going to go out on a super limb and say the Lord led us here to Psalm 11:25. And he did no. Proverbs 11:25. That's funny. A generous person will prosper. Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. Yes, I have a fancy watch for my papa. But I've been told by others he was the most generous person that they ever met.

[Martin]

He was.

[Phil Robertson]

And I get to be a part of that generosity. And now he's got, like, some plaque on the side of the road.

[Martin]

He does. He really does.

[Phil Robertson]

I gotta get out of here.

[Jase Robertson]

All right, we'll see y'all next time.