Duck Call Room Podcast: "Uncle Si’s Grizzly Bear Survival Plan Is Totally Unhinged"

Date: February 12, 2026
Hosts: Si Robertson, Justin Martin, John-David Owen, John Godwin, Jay Stone, Phillip McMillan, Jacob Mayo
Episode Theme:
A hilarious and rambling conversation in the Duck Call Room, where the boys cover everything from memorable hunting adventures and Olympic oddities to unfiltered advice on surviving a grizzly bear encounter, family stories, and the chaos of raising grandbabies. The episode delivers the blend of southern wisdom, tall tales, and banter fans know and love—punctuated by Si’s absolutely unhinged (and totally suspect) bear survival strategies.

1. Weekend Recap & Hunting Adventures

• Arkansas Veterans & Kids Hunting Day:

  • Si shares a memorable hunt with six veterans and four kids: “We killed 46 total.” (01:11)
  • Praise for Arkansas and Louisiana for extending special hunting days: “Thank you to the great state of Arkansas for doing that for our veterans and for our children.” (00:47)
  • Discussion of scenic cypress breaks and the pleasures of untamed nature.

• Funny First Date Stories:

  • The gang swaps tales of taking their significant others hunting on first dates, from squirrel hunts to Chili’s nostalgia.
  • Si: “When I was shooting at the squirrel, she was on my back. Kill him, kill him, kill him… and after you failed, she said, 'You killed that poor little squirrel.'” (03:51)

• Changing Seasons & Surviving the Cold Snap:

  • Weather whiplash: Recounting the recent “ice-NATO” and appreciating shorts weather in Louisiana, with some ribbing for friends stuck up north.

2. Olympic Oddities & Small Town Takes

• Winter Olympics Fascination:

  • The crew laughs about how foreign winter sports seem—crazy speeds on skis, wild figure skating “on butter knives,” and the insanity of luge runs.
  • John: “They're going 90 miles an hour on a pair of skis.” (07:39)
  • Joke about needing ten-foot skis instead of seven-foot.

• Jamaican Bobsled Dreams:

  • Full-hearted support for both Team USA and the Jamaican bobsledders: “I'm generally a Team USA homer, but go Jamaica on the bobsled. I want a Cool Runnings 2!” (10:08)
  • Movie discussion and John Candy/X references.

• Super Bowl Recap & Commercials:

  • Briefly touch on Seattle Seahawks’ win.
  • Talk about the changing appeal of Super Bowl commercials and the difficulties of actually catching them with little kids around.

3. Family Life & Parenting Antics

• Parenting the Robertson Way:

  • Si and the crew swap grandkid updates, confusion between identical twins (“...she said, did you switch with me? I thought you could tell them apart!” (38:03)), and confessions about diaper duty.

• Childhood “Bath Time” Wars:

  • Justin: “Bath time could go so much quicker if we just take a shower, but they're trying to hang out. That's the last stop before bed.” (41:03)
  • The lure of Hot Wheels and Monster Trucks as motivators for chores.

• Unfiltered Discussion: Baby Poop Facts

  • Si dispenses legendary wisdom on the difference between breastfed and formula-fed baby diapers.
  • “My tracer, she breastfed... then she switched to formula—good creepy, there was a big difference when they pooped!” (39:49)

• Advice on Cleanliness:

  • Jay Stone brags about getting early morning coffee for his wife, Paula.
  • The wonders of getting all three kids old enough to shower themselves.

4. Unhinged Grizzly Bear Survival Strategies

The Heart (and Comic Core) of the Episode:

[23:13 – 36:30]

• Wolves vs. Bears Debate:

  • General agreement that wolves—because they hunt in packs—are scarier than a lone bear:
    • Justin: “One on one or one versus ten? I'm not going to win the one on one, but I feel like I may have a chance. But me vs 10, I'm out.” (31:26)

• Grizzly Bear Survival Advice (Or Lack Thereof):

  • The gang mockingly reviews official advice:
    • “If a grizzly bear approaches, stay calm. Well, that—come on...” (23:47)
    • “I got to speak in a low calm voice and wave my arms to identify myself as human. Like that bear gives a…” (24:15)
    • “If it attacks you, play dead… only fight back if the attack persists. So now...now you’re whooped, then you can fight back.” (25:00)

• Uncle Si's Survival Plan – Satire or Survival?

  • Si: "I made a rule a long time ago. I don't hunt anything that hunts me back." (27:34)
  • “I'm certain of the resurrection…that ain't the way I want to meet him.” (28:24)
  • Three-bear rule, courtesy of John-David:
    • “If it’s black, fight back. If it’s brown, lay down. If it’s white—good night.” (28:44)
  • Joking about being “straight out of luck” with polar bears:
    • “If somebody tells you I got ate by a polar bear, the first question you need to ask is: how did he end up in the Arctic Circle?” (29:10)
  • General consensus: run, yell, spray bear spray, but ultimately, “I will be going down in a blaze of glory.” (35:54)

5. From Home Repairs to Tree Climbing Schemes

• Tackling Downed Limbs:
  • Hilarious brainstorming on how to remove a dangerous, high-hanging limb after the ice storm—suggestions include shotguns, casting fishing lines with weights, and eventually a bow and arrow.
    • “I took, I had, I took. I only had 14 pound test, but I was gonna bring it back… that weight went down and then I saw it go around that limb probably eight times. Well, that ain’t coming back.” (49:12)
  • The gang conclude that sometimes the “professionals with the bucket trucks” just make more sense.

6. Life in Alaska (Listener Email)

• Reader Email Segment [52:09+]
  • Kelsey from Alaska sends hunting photos and asks if the guys have ever hunted there.
  • The crew admires her trophy photos, awed by the giant moose: “To me, it's a giant.” (52:38)
  • Discussion turns to unusual meats—moose, caribou, even bear.
    • Si: “I wouldn't eat bear. I mean, I would if I had to, but if I started that, me and them are tight.” (54:02)
    • “They say mountain lion’s great... but I ain't ever.” (54:48)
• Reflections on the Dangers of Northern Wildlife:
  • Jokes about the mountain lions and being watched by wild animals on the way to deer stands:
    • “Remember that in the bow range, we got up there 7J? Yeah. I'm out. Man, you're living in a backyard of big cats.” (55:47)

7. Notable/Memorable Quotes & Moments

Hunting & Family

• “All you boys that got a woman, you do what she wants in the summer, and you get to do what you want all winter. Unless she does it with you, then you got it made.” (02:43, Godwin)

Life Lessons & Bear Survival

• “I don't hunt anything hunts me back. As a bear’ll hunt you back.” (27:34, Si)
• “If it’s black, fight back. If it’s brown, lay down. If it’s white—good night.” (28:44, John-David)
• “I just as soon remove that one from his repertoire...I just stay out of that chapter on bears.” (28:28, Justin)

Grandkids & Parenting

• “My tracer, she breastfed now. Then when she switched to formula—good creepy, no, there was a big difference when they pooped.” (39:49, Si)

On Parenting Young Kids

• “Bath time could go so much quicker if we just take a shower, but they're trying to hang out...” (41:03, Justin)

8. Episode Flow & Tone

• Language: Fun, southern, and easygoing; lots of humor, self-deprecation, and affectionate ribbing.
• Atmosphere: Feels like hanging out in the Duck Call Room—stories jump from subject to subject, with hilarious interruptions and honest, often self-mocking life advice.

9. Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment | Start Time | Notable Moments | |--------------------------|-----------|---------------------------------------------------------------------| | Arkansas Hunt Recap | 00:36 | Si's Veteran's Day hunt, tall tales | | Winter Olympics Chat | 06:22 | Reactions to downhill skiing, figure skating, luge, Cool Runnings | | Grizzly Survival Advice | 23:13 | Three-bear rule, "stand your ground," Si's 'play dead' arguments | | More Bear/Wolf Talk | 31:10 | Wolves vs. Grizzlies, air horn debate | | Alaska Email Segment | 52:09 | Moose/caribou/bear eating, hunting in Alaska | | Grandkid Stories | 37:04 | Si's twin grandbabies, diaper wisdom, Hot Wheels | | Dangerous Limb Dilemma | 48:06 | Fishing line, shotguns, tree saddle jokes |

In summary:
This episode is peak Duck Call Room: an unapologetically rambling, wide-ranging, and laugh-packed conversation where hunting stories lead to Olympic oddities, which in turn lead to hilarious bear survival “tips” (most not to be trusted), then on to family life, snow days, and the realities of country living. Si’s signature blend of common sense and absurdity anchors the show, and fans will leave both entertained and absolutely certain that they don’t want to test Uncle Si’s bear strategies in the wild.

Closing Word:
“I just as soon remove that one from his repertoire of book writings on the Book of Life. I just stay out of that chapter on bears.” (28:28, Justin Martin)