Ask, Tell, Confess: His Bush Was a Dream Catcher

Summary

Dumb Blonde Podcast: "Ask, Tell, Confess: His Bush Was a Dream Catcher"

Host: Bunnie XO
Co-hosts: Haley and Jaime
Date: May 22, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of the Dumb Blonde podcast dives headfirst into listener confessions and wild stories, centering on relationships, sex, and seriously awkward or hilarious moments. Bunnie XO, alongside her co-hosts Haley and Jaime, read submissions from fans and react candidly, offering a mix of humor, empathy, and unapologetic realness. Topics this week include body image struggles, the hazards of pubic hair, medical oddities, sexual preferences gone too far, and tales of public (and sometimes paranormal) sexcapades.

As always, the tone is raw, comedic, and supportive—a no-holds-barred girls' (and guys') night where nothing is off limits.

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Key Discussion Points & Memorable Moments

1. Body Image & Weight Loss

(03:41 – 04:37)

• The panel opens discussing rainy weather and playful banter over who looks "snatched" or "tiny."
• Bunnie addresses how women struggle with body image:

  "That’s called body dysmorphia. Welcome to my world. It’s losing weight, in general—just for women, we have it so hard." (04:14)

Insight:

• The group notes the double standard for women: gaining a little weight gets criticism, while losing significant weight doesn’t necessarily lead to feeling better about oneself.

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2. Confession: The "Dream Catcher" Bush

(04:56 – 07:23)

• A listener shares a story about dating a bald cop with a "1970s bush," which ended the relationship.
• Bunnie quips:

  "Nobody wants a fucking snake in the grass... pubic hair is not attractive on anybody... it literally holds smell." (06:09)

• Hilarious analogies ensue about pubic hair being like a dream catcher and needing a bobby pin or "bump-it" to style it.

Memorable Quotes:

• Bunnie: "That hair down there is like a drop—it's like a dream catcher. It catches everything, good or bad." (06:31)
• Haley: "She said put a bobby pin in it." (07:04)

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3. Pubic Hair Preferences

(07:23 – 10:21)

• The crew discusses what’s worse: full bush, stubble, or baby-smooth.
• Guest/Caller: “If it’s a little hair, I like a little hair. Too much will have... ‘fumes,’ I call them.”
• Jaime: "Sometimes I don’t like when it’s too freshly shaved because it just looks like a naked mole rat." (10:36)
• Haley: "Like that thing from Kim Possible!" (10:46)

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4. Outrageous Medical Story: The Frog

(11:33 – 13:28)

• Bunnie reads a shocking confession from a former medic: a patient had a frog removed from her vagina.

  "The doctor used the speculum and turned the light on to look and he pulled out a frog from her hoot nanny. The girl looked absolutely shocked." (12:18)

• The group debates (with comic horror) how it could happen—was it a tadpole that grew? Did she not feel it move? Was it dead?
• Haley: "Frog puss is insane." (12:37)

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5. Lost Tampons and Period Mishaps

(13:49 – 16:14)

• Haley reads a listener’s tale of losing a tampon far inside after sex—requiring 45 minutes and "architectural dig" to retrieve.
• Bunnie: "How big is your cervix?" (15:40)
• Conversation turns to tilted uteruses and why tampons can hurt.

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6. Housekeeping Finds Your Sex Toys

(18:58 – 20:23)

• A listener’s story: after wild hotel sex, housekeeping laid out their sex toys neatly on their Spongebob blanket.
• Bunnie: "They don’t care, man. Housekeepers will put you on blast..." (19:55)
• Haley: "We're just raw dogging people's toys." (20:17)

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7. Relationship Red Flags

(20:28 – 21:54)

• Submission about a toxic, on-off relationship where the partner accuses her of cheating and is caught messaging other women.
• Bunnie: "Why would you want to be with somebody who acts like that?" (21:26)
• The group collectively urges the listener to break free.

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8. Sexual "Deal Breakers": The Poo Request

(22:01 – 24:38)

• Story: Listener dumped a guy after he requested she defecate in his mouth.
• Bunnie: "I mean, I’ve been paid to pee on people..." (22:27)
• Jaime: "Men are just... I hate all of them." (23:30)
• The hosts riff on Two Girls One Cup, bodily fluids, and men’s kinks, with much laughter and disbelief.
• Haley: "You're coming with both [pee and poop]..." (24:35)

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9. Sex in Public/Weird Places

(26:00 – 27:46)

• Listener recounts hooking up outdoors by an old penitentiary, watched by a nonchalant cop.
• Bunnie: "Was the cop hot, though? ... Like if it's some old Howdy Doody–looking dude, he was probably jacking off." (26:32)
• The group discusses enjoying being watched and memorable sex locations.
• Bunnie: "I like to have sex anywhere but the bedroom." (27:14)

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10. Unusual Comfort Movies

(29:14 – 30:19)

• After discussing Dracula’s (questionable) hotness and its unlikely status as a comfort movie, the hosts share their own unusual comfort films.
• Haley: "Mine’s Joe Dirt. Yeah, you have a mini Joe Dirt, which is funny, dude. So sweet." (30:16)

---

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• Bunnie: "Nobody wants a fucking snake in the grass." (06:09)
• Guest: "I call them... fumes. That’s where the smell stays." (10:21)
• Haley: "Frog puss is insane." (12:37)
• Listener confession: "It was like Christopher Columbus discovering new land." (15:15)
• Jaime: "We're just raw dogging people's toys." (20:17)
• Bunnie: "What is this—he’s got a porta-potty for a mouth?" (22:52)
• Bunnie: "If I could get bent over somewhere, probably like on a vacation, looking over a balcony..." (28:04)
• Haley: "I love Joe Dirt so much, I birthed Joe Dirt." (30:13)

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Episode Flow

The episode briskly bounces between listener confessions—some sexual, some cringe, some hilarious—and the hosts’ spontaneous, candid reactions. The trio’s chemistry fuels both empathy and humor, encouraging listeners to embrace their own awkward experiences without shame. They end by encouraging further submissions and promising more "Ask, Tell, Confess" content via Instagram DMs.

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For New Listeners

If you’re seeking genuine belly laughs, body-positive empowerment, and a sense of community built on openness and zero judgment, this episode is textbook Dumb Blonde: raunchy, real, and—above all—relatable. Even if you haven’t heard this installment, you’ll leave with new anecdotal ammo for girls’ night, and maybe think twice before leaving your toys out for housekeeping.

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For more wild stories, follow the Dumb Blonde Podcast and submit your own confessions for future episodes!

Transcript

[Bunny]

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[Haley]

Tell conf.

[Bunny]

Hello, friends. Welcome to another Ask, tell.

[Ad Voice / Announcer]

Me.

[Haley]

Still going. Hey,

[Bunny]

had to be dramatic. How's everybody doing?

[Haley]

We're doing great.

[Jaime]

Doing good.

[Haley]

It's rainy day.

[Bunny]

Very rainy day.

[Jaime]

Love it.

[Bunny]

So, Haley, you're looking really snatched, sister. You're looking so good.

[Haley]

You're really tiny.

[Bunny]

Tiny, tiny.

[Jaime]

Never heard that before.

[Bunny]

Yeah. First tiny, tiny man. Yeah. How do you feel?

[Jaime]

Great.

[Bunny]

I feel like every time you're on the show, you get smaller and smaller.

[Haley]

A hundred percent.

[Jaime]

It's crazy because, like, when I watch myself, I still feel like I look the same.

[Bunny]

Well, that's called body dysmorphia.

[Haley]

Okay, cool.

[Bunny]

Sorry. Welcome to my world. That's right, man. It's losing weight in general, just for women. We have it so hard.

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

Like, if we gain three pounds, we're, you know, razzed for it. But if we lose 20, we don't feel like we look good, you know? It's crazy.

[Haley]

Such a strange concept.

[Bunny]

Yeah, it's a very, very strange.

[Jaime]

You look skinny too, man.

[Haley]

Oh, you so widdle.

[Bunny]

All right, who's gonna. Jaime, everybody wants you to read and ask, tell, confess.

[Guest / Caller]

Is that true?

[Bunny]

So why don't we let you kick it off?

[Haley]

He said, is that true?

[Guest / Caller]

Is that true?

[Bunny]

Why don't we let you kick it off, buddy?

[Guest / Caller]

All right. All righty. This person remains anonymous. Way back when I started dating this cop, he was bald and had a dangerous, badass biker edge, which made him more attractive than he actually was. We finally get to the night we are going to do the deed. And as I'm sitting at the foot of the bed taking off my shoes, he walks over about to about a foot away from the bed and drops his pants. Out pops a 1970s bush, and I busted out laughing uncontrollably I don't know how. I don't know why this took me off so, so off guard. And to hit my funny bone just like a ton of bricks. But that was it for me. The relationship didn't last long. He said he wasn't into the metrosexual thing of shaving. I explained that he could buzz it down just a tad. He then declined. I gave it one more chance. And I couldn't let that fuzzy funky bush near my body. Never mind my face. His loss. Please don't use my name.

[Haley]

Can we please name this episode Fuzzy Funky Bush?

[Bunny]

Okay, listen, I don't blame her. Nobody wants a fucking snake in the grass.

[Haley]

You gotta fucking dig for that snake in the grass.

[Bunny]

Nobody, you know? Cause it like, pokes out and then it'. Pubic hair is not attractive on anybody. I don't care who it is. It's weird. It's curly. It's coarse. Yeah. And it. It literally holds. Smell.

[Haley]

It does.

[Bunny]

So it's like. And you have to imagine if a guy sweats or like even farts the wrong way. That hair down there is like a drop. It's like a dream catcher. It catches all the everything good or bad.

[Haley]

Push it back.

[Jaime]

Oh, give it a middle part. Yeah.

[Bunny]

You gotta brush it to like, lay it down. I can't do it. I. I don't blame her. Sister. Listen, I understand wholeheartedly how you are feeling. There's no way I'm diving in the.

[Haley]

Just imagine a claw clip. She said put a bobby pin in it.

[Bunny]

Ew.

[Haley]

Just to like.

[Bunny]

What if you got like a little bump? Remember the bump hairdo? I used to wear those.

[Guest / Caller]

Bump it.

[Bunny]

Yeah, the little bump it hairdo.

[Haley]

That's so funny.

[Bunny]

I can't do it, dude.

[Guest / Caller]

So you're no bush team. No bush team.

[Bunny]

No bush on male or female. You guys know how I stand.

[Haley]

We know how she feels. She's still. She named mine.

[Bunny]

Yeah. I forgot what we named it.

[Haley]

What was it? Do you remember where she need my vagina?

[Bunny]

Oh, man. Maybe.

[Haley]

Show us.

[Bunny]

It was a good one. It was a good one. I can't remember the name. Damn it.

[Guest / Caller]

I don't remember either.

[Bunny]

We don't even smoke weed in our Barney.

[Haley]

Barney Rubble.

[Bunny]

Yes. Barney stubble.

[Haley]

Yeah, Barney Stubble. Because I'll cut it down.

[Jaime]

Like.

[Haley]

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[Bunny]

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[Haley]

I mean it's like skin.

[Guest / Caller]

Well, what's more uncomfortable?

[Bunny]

Sounds like five o' clock shadow on your puss like we talked about.

[Haley]

I know.

[Guest / Caller]

Isn't it uncomfortable if you're having intercourse with somebody who just shaved down start a fire?

[Haley]

Yeah, that's what I want to know.

[Guest / Caller]

That's my thing. That's why I, I don't mind a bush. To be. To be honest, I don't. I'm not a. When Brooke says oh, you know I haven't shaved a little bit, I'm like great.

[Bunny]

I'm.

[Guest / Caller]

I'm in it. Wilderness explorer. I'm going in.

[Ad Voice / Announcer]

Wow.

[Bunny]

Not having shaved in a little bit is way different than having straigh straight up bush.

[Guest / Caller]

There is a. If there's like a full on untamed bush, I agree that's not okay. But if. If it's a little hair, I like a little hair because I don't know Too much will have a fumes. I call them.

[Haley]

You just call them as pubes Fumes.

[Guest / Caller]

Fumes, yeah. That's where the smell stays. But yeah. And even for a dude, I feel like it's a little more appropriate for a guy to have just a little bit. Because if it's just completely shaved on there, that's like a. Like a velcro strap.

[Jaime]

Like, I don't like when it. Yeah, sometimes I don't like when it's like too freshly shaved because it just looks like a naked mole rat.

[Guest / Caller]

Yeah, it does. You know, it really does.

[Haley]

Yeah, like that thing from Kim Possible.

[Jaime]

Yeah, it's like it's a little me

[Bunny]

fucking bare skin, but not a freshly shaved. Like I don't have sex right after I get out of the shower and shave because that hurts. But give it like a day to.

[Haley]

Just looks like a day after all the time.

[Bunny]

Yeah, well, everybody's day. I know a girl who would shave and like five hours later she'd have like five o' clock shadow.

[Jaime]

My God, it takes me a week.

[Bunny]

No. Yeah, I can't grow hair like that either.

[Haley]

I haven't shaved my legs in at least four days.

[Bunny]

Yeah. All right, you guys ready for mine? Yes, I'm ready. You guys are weirdos.

[Jaime]

I still can't get over the bobby pin.

[Bunny]

Like the clips you use to put her hair back.

[Haley]

Like her bangs. Like clam clips.

[Bunny]

Ready?

[Haley]

Yep.

[Bunny]

I remember you guys had a story a while back about someone going to the doctor and then finding something in their cooch. Well, when I was a medic, I was working at an urgent care and a woman in her 20s came in with pelvic pain. We did do STD testing at this particular site. So the doctor had me set up the room for screening as the woman had requested. She said she had been to the river that past weekend and when she got home, she noticed a bad smell and lots of pain down there. The doctor on site was a male, so I stayed in the room to make sure she was comfortable. When we started the test, the entire room smelled awful. I mean, like something dead was inside. The doctor used the speculum and turned the light on to look and he pulled out a frog from her hoot nanny. The girl looked absolutely shocked. But all I have to say is thank God it was during COVID and we were all wearing masks because my facial expressions would have gotten me fired. And there's no way that thing hopped in there by itself.

[Haley]

Frog puss is insane.

[Bunny]

Frog puss? Wart puss. Okay, you do you Frogs give warts.

[Haley]

Dude, that's a rumor. It's not true.

[Jaime]

Wait, really?

[Bunny]

Can you imagine walking around with a frog in your. Did you not feel that moving?

[Jaime]

Was it a lie?

[Guest / Caller]

They make noises.

[Jaime]

I need to know.

[Haley]

I don't know, bro. It sounded like that thing outside the window earlier. Could you imagine?

[Jaime]

It had to be a small one.

[Guest / Caller]

Are you sure it wasn't a toad?

[Jaime]

What's the difference?

[Guest / Caller]

I don't know.

[Bunny]

I don't know either. I think toads are like whiter, frogs are like more. I don't know. I just. When I read that story stop a frog and the.

[Haley]

It just.

[Jaime]

How do you knock it up?

[Bunny]

Frog.

[Jaime]

Frog puss. Oh, you guys.

[Haley]

I feel like it would have made

[Bunny]

of sound if it was alive. It had to be dead then.

[Jaime]

Yeah, because like how do you know?

[Haley]

It just sucked it up like a vacuum. Wait a shot back.

[Guest / Caller]

Was she doing like cliff jumping or something?

[Jaime]

Maybe like landed on it. Could have killed it on impact. And he said, yeah, or what if

[Bunny]

it was like a tadpole and it swam up there and grew a little bit?

[Haley]

That's actually a possibility.

[Jaime]

It could have.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

Because how long, how long did she.

[Bunny]

She said it was like she went to the. The river during the weekend.

[Haley]

Okay, okay, I'm going in. I'm going in. With a thing stuck in people's puss. Okay, okay, okay. This one says okay. This she said so. I was 23. Freshly out of my only long term relationship since I was 16. Basically a sheltered Victorian child released into the world with zero knowledge and too much confidence. A guy I vaguely knew, friend of my ex, comes over at 1am I would I very clearly tell him I'm on my period, we cannot do anything. He says, cool. Still comes over. So already red flag behavior. Things escalate fast. I remind him I have a tampon in. He hits me with the classic, I'll just put the tip in. And somehow my brain fully disconnected from reality and we end up having sex. Immediately after I go to the bathroom, the tampon is gone.

[Bunny]

Oh no.

[Haley]

I spent 45 minutes squatting over the toilet like a gargoyle, sweating, panicking, basically performing a architectural dig on myself, bearing down with God, promising I would become. While bargaining with God, promising I would become celibate if he just helped me find this tampon. Finally I find it. And when I tell you that thing was so far up in there, it was like Christopher Columbus discovering new land. Never spoke to that man again. And to this day, every time I inserted a tampon, I think, remember what happened last time, you little slut.

[Bunny]

I mean, we've all had a tampon story. You guys have heard mine, so, I mean, I can't judge her for that.

[Jaime]

Do you have a tampon story?

[Bunny]

No.

[Haley]

I've never gotten.

[Jaime]

I suck two one time. What?

[Bunny]

Huh?

[Jaime]

One time. I pulled out two. This is like deck over a decade ago.

[Bunny]

Damn. How big is your cervix?

[Jaime]

I don't know.

[Haley]

Lucky you. I just found out. I gotta insert.

[Jaime]

I was probably like one on top of the other. Oh. But I, like, thought I didn't have one in, so I put a new one in.

[Bunny]

That's crazy.

[Haley]

I had a surprise. I always thought it just hurt putting a tamponalized.

[Jaime]

I don't remember.

[Bunny]

Mine smelled. I, like, went to the.

[Jaime]

I'm sure, like, don't. Tampons always.

[Haley]

Did you go to the doctor and

[Bunny]

they didn't find it.

[Haley]

And they never found it because I

[Bunny]

have a tilted uterus.

[Haley]

Okay. That's what I was gonna say. I just found out you have to put tampons in differently if you have a tilted uterus. And I didn't know that.

[Bunny]

Nobody's ever told me that either.

[Haley]

Yes. You have to put them in at a different angle than normal people.

[Jaime]

Don't wear them.

[Ad Voice / Announcer]

That's why they hurt me.

[Bunny]

Yeah. I can't wear them.

[Haley]

You're not supposed. It's not supposed to hurt.

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Haley]

If you put it incorrectly. Found this on Tick tock. Then it doesn't hurt.

[Bunny]

I'm good. I don't want the diapers now. Yeah, I like that.

[Haley]

Period free bleeding.

[Jaime]

Like my period doesn't last as long as.

[Haley]

Yes, same.

[Bunny]

Well, yes. They say that the chemicals from pads and from tampons is what extends the bleeding, so.

[Jaime]

And makes the cramping.

[Haley]

Yeah. I'd be like five or six days, sometimes seven. And now I'm down to like four and a half. And then barbecue sauce. Mm.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

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[Bunny]

The old barbecue sauce.

[Jaime]

Go ahead.

[Bunny]

Okay.

[Jaime]

My husband and I went away for some much needed alone time. And we packed a few friends for the trip, along with my emotional support spongebob blanket that I absolutely cannot sleep without. One morning we had ourselves a great time, left the room looking a small tornado hit it and headed out for lunch. It was already afternoon, so we figured housekeeping had already come through. And we didn't put the do not distort, do not disturb sign on the door, but thought nothing of it. Well, lunch turned into a casino trip, so we were gone for a few hours and we finally get back to the room and open the door and nearly died on the spot. My spongebob blanket was spread perfectly across the bed like a luxury display. And our toys were neatly lined up on top of it like they were posing for a family Christmas card.

[Bunny]

Oh

[Haley]

my gosh.

[Bunny]

So who put him out?

[Jaime]

Housekeeping lined up their toys.

[Bunny]

Oh, I believe on the bed. They'll do that. They don't care. I'm telling you, they do not care. How housekeepers will put you on blast one try to sit in my lap, you know.

[Haley]

Yeah. I don't care. That was crazy. They don't care, man.

[Bunny]

They're there to do a job.

[Jaime]

Touching someone's toys.

[Haley]

I'm sure they had gloves on.

[Bunny]

No, I've never seen my house cleaners use gloves.

[Jaime]

No.

[Haley]

Ever. We're just raw dogging people's toys.

[Bunny]

What if they picked them up and sniffed each one?

[Jaime]

I would.

[Haley]

That's wild. That is crazy.

[Bunny]

Okay, so I've been with this guy for going on three years, and he was always breaking up with me all the time. Should. He assumed I did. For example, this last time, he accused me of having an email. I had no knowledge of being able to get in, too, due to the fact that an email had been revived From Timu in 2025 a few days past. And he proceeded to start telling me he loved me again and acting as if everything was back to normal. Then he realized I messaged the girl I caught him talking to. She was supposed to be his ex, but she said she doesn't want him. She just used him. But then comes at me sideways because I had sent those messages to her. So he says he's done with me due to being a sneaky, conniving. Supposedly. So what I want to know is if y' all feel like he is going to choose another woman over our relationship.

[Haley]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

I mean, I think you have a lot more to worry about than him choosing another woman. Like, you guys don't even get along.

[Jaime]

Yes.

[Bunny]

Why are you. Why would you want to be with somebody who acts like that?

[Haley]

No. Like, you're clearly not happy. He's not happy. Why do you guys.

[Jaime]

I mean, if you had to write in to ask us, I think you know your answer 100.

[Bunny]

And I mean, if he's cheating on you with some other girl and she's using him, like, girl, cut the cord.

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Haley]

Let it go. Be free.

[Bunny]

Let it go. Let it go.

[Haley]

That's all I know can hold me back. And I'm clearly the mom here.

[Bunny]

Yeah. Get out of that. That sounds like a toxic cesspool.

[Haley]

So hate it.

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Haley]

All right, this one. Short and sweet. Met a man that checked on my boxes, then told me to in his mouth or it was over. She is now single.

[Guest / Caller]

Why?

[Haley]

Okay.

[Bunny]

Did he want it soft or hard?

[Guest / Caller]

Yeah.

[Haley]

What.

[Bunny]

How are you?

[Guest / Caller]

What's the problem?

[Jaime]

In the mouth.

[Bunny]

And I shits on the bitch. Like Notorious B.I.G. he says that?

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

I mean, listen, I've been paid to pee on people.

[Haley]

My other one says one time I had a guy want me to pee in his mouth. Yeah.

[Bunny]

I'VE been paid to pee on people.

[Jaime]

I get the peeing on people, but I know I don't get that, but in the mouth.

[Haley]

Two girls, one cup. Did you ever watch that dookie? You heard it was fake? Was it a frosty? Kind of frosty vibes?

[Bunny]

I heard it was fake, too. Yeah.

[Guest / Caller]

Looks fake.

[Bunny]

I don't know. So. I mean, more power to you, sister. I feel like you dodged a bullet. Like, what. How many other fucking. What is this? He's got a porta potty for a mouth. Like, you're kissing that man. And he's got all sorts of other women, so. Turds.

[Haley]

I wonder if they kissed before.

[Bunny]

Oh, maybe with a little bit of corn in it.

[Haley]

Oh,

[Bunny]

she said he checked all of her boxes, so obviously. Yeah, obviously they've been doing some stuff,

[Guest / Caller]

you know, But I wonder what the trade off is. Like, are there other qualities that are maybe good? Like, maybe he pays all our bills.

[Haley]

The. In his mouth. Absolutely not.

[Bunny]

Men are just. I hate all of them.

[Guest / Caller]

Saying, he could be a nice guy. He didn't cheat.

[Bunny]

I'm sure he's a great guy, but, you know, eating turds is probably the last thing you want to do.

[Guest / Caller]

Well, he probably doesn't eat it. He probably just has it in his mouth and spits it out.

[Haley]

I feel like you know a lot more about this than you're willing to admit.

[Guest / Caller]

I'm just saying, like, I didn't hear anything. I just hear something that he likes to do behind closed doors. I didn't hear anything wrong with. You know, if it's a no harm, no foul. You know, like, if it's definitely foul,

[Haley]

that's 100% a foul.

[Guest / Caller]

We'll just put out some garbage.

[Bunny]

I mean, do you like to eat shit?

[Haley]

You imagine if he. Like, could you imagine if she lined it like we do the toilets on the tour bus?

[Bunny]

What if she had a fucking hemorrhoid and she's got to. She's got a lay stand over him and scrunch. Like, nobody wants to see that. There's nothing attractive about that.

[Guest / Caller]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

And what if it's diarrhea and it splurges. Splashes in his eyes? Like, what if she had food coloring

[Jaime]

and it was green?

[Bunny]

There's so many. What if she ate. What if she ate asparagus the day before? You know she's peeing and you can't poop without peeing.

[Haley]

Yeah. So I feel like that's. You're coming with both.

[Jaime]

Yeah. Two for one. Yeah.

[Haley]

What the fuck?

[Bunny]

Okay. All right. Who's next.

[Guest / Caller]

Tired of overpaying with DirecTV? Dish offers a reliable low price every month without surprises. Get the TV you love and start watching live sports news and the latest movies. Plus your favorite streaming apps all in one place. Switch to Dish today and lock in the lowest price in satellite TV starting at $89.99 a month with our two year price guarantee. Call 888, add dish or visit dish.com today.

[Haley]

Hey, sweetie. Your mother showed me this Carvana thing for selling the car. I'm going to give it a try. Wish me luck. Me again. I put in the license plate. It gave me an offer. Unbelievable. Okay, I accepted the offer. They're picking it up Tuesday from the driveway. I haven't even left my chair. It's done. The car is gone. I'm holding a check anyway. Carvana, give it a whirl. Love ya.

[Ad Voice / Announcer]

So good you'll want to leave a voicemail about it. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up.

[Bunny]

Fees may apply.

[Haley]

I read mine. Okay.

[Bunny]

You guys are got. You guys got some strange ones this week.

[Jaime]

This week I have nothing like yours this week.

[Haley]

Yeah, I feel like people come harder.

[Jaime]

In my inbox, please.

[Haley]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

When I was in my early 20s, in the town I grew up in, there was an old penitentiary. The grounds are covered in trees and it's basically in the middle of a small town. I was on a walk with a guy I was seeing, and it was the middle of the night. We decided to walk through the trees in the old penitentiary and started getting all hot and heavy. We ended up screwing in the middle of trees. And when we got done, we put ourselves back together. We watched a police. A police officer walk away from a tree. He was just watching us get it on. And he didn't say anything, just walked away. I think that's hot.

[Haley]

Was the.

[Bunny]

Was the cop hot, though?

[Jaime]

That would make a difference.

[Bunny]

Yeah, like if it's some old Howdy Doody looking dude, he was back there,

[Jaime]

he was probably jacking off.

[Haley]

He was a hundred percent.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Haley]

Yeah, for sure. Peeping Tom.

[Jaime]

I like that.

[Haley]

Watch your whole family eat dinner.

[Bunny]

But if it was a hot cop, join in.

[Haley]

Okay.

[Ad Voice / Announcer]

Yeah.

[Haley]

Let's go threesome at a penitentiary.

[Jaime]

I like. I like that some people watching you. No, like,

[Bunny]

oh, me too. I love that. Like, please.

[Jaime]

I think that's the dark side of me.

[Haley]

Someone's hot and heavy over, she said.

[Jaime]

I think I read this because I knew it would turn.

[Haley]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

Oh, my God. Sex outside. I forgot what that's like. No, it's. It's a good time. I like to have sex anywhere but the bedroom. Like, please get me out of the bedroom. Like, if I have to stare in these walls again, like graveyard something.

[Guest / Caller]

Graveyard is crazy.

[Haley]

She has. Have you heard the story? Got her mouth beat, blood everywhere.

[Guest / Caller]

Was there at least at night time.

[Bunny]

I did weird when I was on drugs, guys. So I don't think I would have sex in a graveyard now.

[Haley]

Okay.

[Bunny]

Maybe outside of it or something, you know, looking. I just looking at ambiance of a graveyard. I think it's romantic, you know, I don't know. It's very Edgar Allan Poe, but I just feel like there's so many other places I could get bent over these days, so.

[Haley]

Name one staircase.

[Jaime]

Yeah. What's your number one?

[Bunny]

Outside. If I could get bent over somewhere, probably somewhere with like. Probably like on a vacation, like, you know, looking over a balcony or something. I think that would be hot, you know? What about you guys?

[Jaime]

And be like in a castle.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

Very, like dark, romantic Dracula vibes.

[Bunny]

Oh, yeah. If I could do that too.

[Haley]

How many times have you watched Dracula?

[Bunny]

A lot. Do you play with yourself every time you watch it? No.

[Jaime]

Oh, no.

[Haley]

Have you not jacked off to it?

[Jaime]

No, not to it.

[Bunny]

Yeah, she has.

[Haley]

I feel like she has.

[Bunny]

The way she said no.

[Haley]

Yeah, she said no.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

I would never do that.

[Haley]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Haley]

That's funny as hell.

[Bunny]

No, Dracula's hot, dude. But you know what? The real Dracula was supposedly like. Like hideous.

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Bunny]

Yeah. Like, he was not attractive at all.

[Jaime]

I actually watched the original one, the, like, Brahm Story, and I didn't like it. The one with one Winona Ryder.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

I didn't like it as much.

[Bunny]

Yeah. He's somehow been, like, romanticized throughout the years.

[Jaime]

The new one is definitely way more like love and romantic.

[Bunny]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

That's probably why I like.

[Haley]

Yeah, I feel it. How many times, though?

[Jaime]

All the time. Over ten.

[Bunny]

Damn.

[Jaime]

I know.

[Haley]

Scrolling.

[Bunny]

I don't think any movie is that good to watch.

[Jaime]

Comfort movie. I don't know, it's just. I like the vibes it gives me in a row.

[Bunny]

I can't do it. No, no. I need, like, yearly breaks, you know, like. Like when I watch Beaches or something like that. Like every five years.

[Haley]

Mine's Joe Dirt. Yeah.

[Bunny]

That was his finest work. David Spade.

[Haley]

Yeah.

[Jaime]

Yeah.

[Haley]

I don't know.

[Bunny]

Tommy boy was too.

[Haley]

There's a lot of, like. David Spade really is so iconic. And it's hard to, like, think, like, he's done so much.

[Jaime]

Mine would be binge warmer.

[Haley]

Bench warmers. Is yours for sure. Yeah, no.

[Jaime]

Bench wars are grown ups. Those are my comfort.

[Haley]

I love Joe Dirt so much. I birthed Joe Dirt.

[Jaime]

Yeah, you have a mini Joe Dirt,

[Bunny]

which is funny, dude. So sweet. All right, guys, keep sending in all your weird every Sunday. Oh, I didn't do mine this this Sunday. I completely spaced it.

[Haley]

It's okay.

[Bunny]

Every Sunday on our Instagrams. Ask Tal, Confess. Just send us DMS that say atc. We'll open them up and hopefully you'll make it on the show. Love you. See you later. Bye.