TBT: Amie Balesky

Summary

Podcast Title: Dumb Blonde
Episode: TBT: Amie Balesky
Release Date: May 16, 2025
Host: Bunnie XO, Dumb Blonde Productions
Guest: Amy Balesky, TikTok Spiritual Advisor and Medium

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Introduction

In this heartfelt and revealing episode of the Dumb Blonde podcast, host Bunnie XO welcomes Amy Balesky, a renowned TikTok spiritual advisor and medium. The conversation delves deep into Amy's tumultuous journey through trauma, her discovery of mediumship, and her path to healing and empowerment.

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Amy's Early Life and Experiences with Trauma

Amy begins by sharing her challenging childhood marked by severe illness and loss. Diagnosed with cancer at the age of five, she underwent extensive chemotherapy, which resulted in the loss of her hair, a kidney, parts of her intestines, and part of her liver.

Amy Balesky [08:01]: "I had cancer when I was five. I lost my right kidney, part of my intestines, and part of my liver from it. And that was my first near-death experience."

During her treatment, Amy began experiencing supernatural phenomena, such as seeing spirits and sensing people's thoughts, which she later understood as part of her spiritual gifts.

Amy Balesky [05:35]: "I was like, I'm always seeing spirits and always like you."

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Discovering Mediumship

Amy's ability to communicate with the spiritual realm intensified following her second near-death experience with bacterial meningitis at 16. This event solidified her role as a medium, allowing her to channel spirits and provide insights to others.

Amy Balesky [15:39]: "I had bacterial meningitis. It went up and caused swelling in the brain. After that, I began channeling for people."

Her journey wasn't without challenges. Amy faced skepticism and resistance, especially from her first husband, who labeled her abilities as evil, forcing her to navigate her calling amidst personal turmoil.

Amy Balesky [17:18]: "He told me it was evil. I didn't fully know it, and they didn't really get it either."

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Overcoming Challenges and Personal Growth

Despite numerous surgeries and health complications due to Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome—a connective tissue disorder—Amy's resilience shone through. She underwent 26 surgeries to manage her condition, including life-saving brain surgery at 26, which significantly impacted her physical abilities.

Amy Balesky [20:55]: "Ehlers Danlos syndrome. It's a connective tissue disorder... it falls apart like very easily."

Her experiences with severe health issues deepened her understanding of life's fragility and the importance of living in the present moment, a lesson she emphasizes throughout her spiritual practice.

Amy Balesky [10:10]: "You need to live in the present moment. Life doesn't happen back then or in the future. It's right now."

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Amy's Marriage and Finding Love

Amy recounts her brief and tumultuous first marriage, which ended when she discovered her husband's infidelity while she was recovering from brain surgery. Seeking solace and purpose, she returned to Houston with her son, determined to rebuild her life.

Amy Balesky [29:35]: "I left him with my son and a bag of clothes. I moved back to Houston, and I was still in a wheelchair."

Her path to finding love again was unconventional. After a stint of celibacy and numerous unsuccessful relationships, Amy serendipitously met her current husband, Chris, through Tinder—a platform she’d previously dismissed.

Amy Balesky [37:58]: "I messaged him, and that's my husband."

Their relationship is portrayed as a harmonious balance of energies, with Chris being her Taurus and Amy her Scorpio Libra, complementing each other's strengths and supporting one another's spiritual journeys.

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Transition to TikTok and Success as a Medium

Initially using TikTok to share cooking videos inspired by her Mexican heritage, Amy's spiritual insights began to gain traction. A pivotal moment came when she combined her mediumship with her online presence, leading to exponential growth in her follower base and professional opportunities.

Amy Balesky [41:24]: "I started making food and Mediumship... cooking medium."

Her authenticity and raw storytelling resonated with audiences, positioning her as the most reviewed and highest-rated medium in the United States.

Amy Balesky [73:57]: "I am now the most reviewed and highest-rated medium in the United States."

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Connecting with Spirits: The Case of Aaron Carter

One of the standout moments in the episode is Amy's account of channeling the late pop star Aaron Carter. Through her sessions, Amy provided closure and clarity to Carter's family, revealing truths about his untimely death caused by a seizure induced by drug use.

Amy Balesky [48:40]: "I reached out and contacted Aaron Carter. Three months later, his autopsy confirmed he drowned due to a seizure from drug use."

This interaction not only demonstrated Amy's genuine abilities but also highlighted the profound impact of her work on the living and the departed.

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Understanding the Afterlife and Vibration Levels

Amy elaborates on her belief in the afterlife's structure, categorizing spirits based on their vibrational states. She explains that higher vibrations correspond to positive afterlife realms, while lower vibrations align with places like "hell."

Amy Balesky [50:02]: "He was in a very middle vibration, trying to help his sister move to a higher vibration."

Amy emphasizes that spirits aren't stuck; they have the agency to ascend by helping those they've harmed, underscoring the importance of love and forgiveness in spiritual evolution.

Amy Balesky [46:52]: "Nobody's ever stuck. They can move up by helping those they've hurt."

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Amy's Advice on Living in the Present

A recurring theme in the conversation is the significance of mindfulness and present-moment awareness. Both Bunnie and Amy discuss overcoming anxiety and depression by anchoring themselves in the now, rather than dwelling on the past or fearing the future.

Amy Baleski [10:14]: "My favorite phrase is, you need to live in the present moment."

Amy shares practical techniques for grounding oneself, such as focusing on one's immediate environment and using tactile objects like water bottles to manage panic attacks.

Amy Baleski [11:30]: "Just focus on what the mic looks like... Take a deep breath in, breathe out. Just focus on that."

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Conclusion

The episode culminates with a profound demonstration of Amy's mediumship abilities, as she conducts a live reading and connects with spirits in real-time. The chemistry between Bunnie and Amy showcases a blend of humor, vulnerability, and spiritual depth, offering listeners both entertainment and solace.

Amy's journey from trauma to empowerment serves as an inspiration, illustrating the transformative power of embracing one's true self and purpose. Her insights into the spiritual realm provide comfort to those grappling with loss, anxiety, and the mysteries of the afterlife.

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Notable Quotes

• Amy Balesky [08:01]: "I had cancer when I was five. I lost my right kidney, part of my intestines, and part of my liver from it. And that was my first near-death experience."

• Amy Baleski [10:10]: "You need to live in the present moment. Life doesn't happen back then or in the future. It's right now."

• Amy Baleski [48:40]: "I reached out and contacted Aaron Carter. Three months later, his autopsy confirmed he drowned due to a seizure from drug use."

• Amy Baleski [50:02]: "He was in a very middle vibration, trying to help his sister move to a higher vibration."

• Amy Baleski [11:30]: "Just focus on what the mic looks like... Take a deep breath in, breathe out. Just focus on that."

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For more insights and inspiring stories, tune into the Dumb Blonde podcast every week and join Bunnie XO in embracing life's realness with humor and heart.

Transcript

[Bonnie]

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[Amy Baleski]

Bonnie, who used to be a former sex worker and now hosts the podcast Dumb Blonde.

[Bonnie]

Most little girls grow up wanting to be doctors and lawyers and shit. And I was like, I want to be super hot, make a lot of fucking money and be a rock star's wife. That was my goal as a child. And here we are. What's up, you sexy? Welcome to another episode of Dumb Blonde. Today I have TikTok's spiritual advisor, Amy Bileski. How are you doing, baby? Did I pronounce it right?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, you did. Absolutely.

[Bonnie]

How are you doing, baby?

[Amy Baleski]

I am wonderful. How are you?

[Bonnie]

I'm good. I'm so happy to have you here.

[Amy Baleski]

Thank you. It's been a year, dude.

[Bonnie]

It's been a long time in the making.

[Amy Baleski]

I know it has. Since last October.

[Bonnie]

Yeah. Our schedules have been just fucking insane.

[Amy Baleski]

Everybody's. You are busy all the time.

[Bonnie]

Literally all the time. Talking to dead people every day.

[Amy Baleski]

Teaching classes. Teaching people how to talk to dead people as well.

[Bonnie]

What is a class of teaching people how to talk? Can. Can anybody talk to dead people?

[Amy Baleski]

Anybody can.

[Bonnie]

Really? You don't have to be born with a gift.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, no, because you are spirit inside of A meat sack.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

So it's just getting back to what you are and you have to figure it out because in our normal daily life, nobody teaches you how to do it. And then after that, what do they do? They teach you it's scary or they teach you it's bad.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

You know, and so it's about teaching you how to like ground yourself and feel the environment, the earth and spirit and everything around you.

[Bonnie]

That's insane because I always thought that you had to have a. The gift or a gift.

[Amy Baleski]

I mean, it, it, it's. There are things that kind of like supercharge it, right? There are things like if you have a near death experience, Right. Or certain signs like Scorpio or a lot of cancer, a lot of Pisces and stuff like that, or if you've had a lot of like trauma or tragedy or anything like that, it can kind of like kickstart that. Why? Because you're. You are, are more sensitive, right? You're more into your feelings. You're more into feeling your environment. That's essentially what it is.

[Bonnie]

That's crazy. My. So growing up, I found out because I've always had a thing like a sixth sense.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes.

[Bonnie]

Always seen spirits and always like you.

[Amy Baleski]

Can feel it in people.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, no, always. And I found out before my mom passed away that I have a. I come from a long line of white trash witches from Kentucky.

[Amy Baleski]

There you go. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

I was like. She's like, we all had gifts. I'm like, no wonder you guys are all drug addicts. Like literally.

[Amy Baleski]

Did you know most mediums and people that do this, what do you see? They smoke cigarettes because they calm their anxiety, or they drink a lot of alcohol or they do drugs because it almost every. You can feel everything. Like, even the lights that you have on here right now are very jarring. Personally. I mean, I know nobody really likes them, right? But like it's like an unt day degree at the same thing. And so when you're walking around, you're feeling everybody's feelings and emotions in the room are like all. Everything's vibration. You just kind of have to like, try to mute that. That's why I'm sober. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Well, so I. That makes a lot of sense because I'll walk into grocery stores and I can't handle the lighting. Like, I just told her before, when you were in the bathroom, I was like, these lights are just killing me. Like I can't see. Like, it's really brutal.

[Amy Baleski]

But there's some people like him that it unbother yeah.

[Bonnie]

No, it's crazy. When I was a drug addict, my drug of choice was Xanax, because.

[Amy Baleski]

Downer.

[Bonnie]

Yes. Because I have. I'm just riddled with anxiety. So I was always, like, seeing shit. And ever since I was a kid.

[Amy Baleski]

Did you know your anxiety also means that you are more tapped in the spirit. Right. And you're probably feeling it around. And also because you're dealing in music. And I mean, even think about the music that your husband, that jelly, does. Right. It's a lot of very high emotion. Right. And so that in itself is a vibration. And, you know, all the friends that were around him, all the things that he did, there's all these certain vibrations that come with it that essentially you feel. And it can make you feel uncomfortable.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

And you don't even realize it.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, well, I realize it now. And we'll get. We'll get into that, but I want to find out. Let's bring it all the way back to your childhood.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay.

[Bonnie]

So where'd you grow up?

[Amy Baleski]

Houston, Texas.

[Bonnie]

Oh, you're from Houston, too? I'm from Houston.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

That's amazing. I think you did tell me that.

[Amy Baleski]

What area. What area in Houston?

[Bonnie]

Around Buffalo Speedway.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, you're over there. Okay. Yeah, I'm down in, like, the rich people. Yeah. No, no, no. Yeah, down Baybrook. NASA area.

[Bonnie]

The rich people. You didn't even have to say it.

[Amy Baleski]

But I was. I was thug nasty, though. I grew up. I went to school in Pasiga. Down Dina. Oh, yes. Because that's only where they had orchestra.

[Bonnie]

Wow.

[Amy Baleski]

So I was an orchestra nerd. And so I grew up in, like, by the bay, but then I was on transfer to that school, so that's how I learned Spanish. I love that.

[Bonnie]

That's amazing. As a child, did you always have this gift of knowing?

[Amy Baleski]

And, like, there's a couple weird stories ago that. First off, you know, when you're a kid, you naturally have this gift, right. That's why you see, you know, people that aren't really there. You're like, oh, my God, I saw my grandfather. Well, you do anyways. But I had cancer when I was five. I lost my right kidney, part of my intestines, and part of my liver from it. And that was my first near death experience. And then after that, I started seeing and experiencing spirit. And I can remember. This is like one of the earliest vivid moments is I remember being in the grocery store. Randall's. I'm sure you remember the name Randall. Okay. And I was in there with my sister. And my mom and I was sitting on the bottom of the cart, you know, as a kid, like, huddled under, down, and my sister's on top. And I remember we were stopping and my mom was looking at, like, noodles or something. And on the other side was the coffee aisle, and I was looking at a woman, and I remember looking at her, and I could hear her thoughts. And I was like, she's gonna get that one. And she grabbed it, like she put the one back. And I looked up and I remember. I think I was about 6. And I remember asking my sister, my mom, can. Is this. Can you do that? And they were like, no. What do you mean? And I was like, oh, this is odd. You know, and then it just kind of, like, continuously progressed from there.

[Bonnie]

So your gift was being able to read people's thoughts. You didn't see spirits or did you see spirits.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, see spirits at the same time. Yeah. So. But remember, it's. It's about an intention. You're feeling an intention. You're feeling a thought, A feeling, an emotion. Now, whether I read her thought, I don't believe it was her thought. What it is is that we all have spirits around us, right. And you always have your higher self. I mean, and even something that you want, that you love, right. That attention that is, you know, you're going after it. So you can feel that vibration of what they're going to pick.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

Essentially.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

And so whenever you're reading for somebody, you're not reading their thoughts, you're reading their higher vibration or their higher self.

[Bonnie]

Going through cancer at such a young age. You talk about it so casually.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, well, I mean. Because, I mean, what else are you gonna do? Well, you know, what else are you gonna do?

[Bonnie]

You're a bad bitch. Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, Bad bitch. Exactly. No, I mean, I had.

[Bonnie]

She's like, we don't show emotions over here.

[Amy Baleski]

Exactly. We do. We do. But I cried enough. And. And. And I'm not back there.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

I'm not back in that time. And if I hadn't had that happen to me, I wouldn't be here where I am now.

[Bonnie]

That's. That's profound. We need to clip that, because that's actually really. A lot of people need to hear that. I'm not back there.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Because there's so many people who deal with trauma, and all they keep doing, doing is repeating it on a loop.

[Amy Baleski]

And that's a cycle. Now, this is the whole thing. My favorite phrase is, you know, you need to live in the present moment. You need to live in now. Why? If you have a lot of anxiety, it's because you're living in the future. If you have a lot of depression, it's because you're living in the past. Well, I'm sorry, honey. Life doesn't happen back then or in the future. It's right now.

[Bonnie]

Yes. And that has been my biggest lesson this year, actually, because I realized that, too. And I've never been a depressed human. I only dealt with a depression after I had a misconduct miscarriage in 2020.

[Amy Baleski]

I'm sorry about that.

[Bonnie]

It's okay.

[Amy Baleski]

I get that.

[Bonnie]

And. But I've always had anxiety, and I was always like, I've got to stop future tripping. And it's helped me tremendously because. To try to be in the present moment because I'm like, I don't want to worry about what's going to happen 10 minutes from now. Like, I just want to enjoy who I'm with, what I'm doing.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

You know, so now my anxiety only flares up, like, if I get, like, super stressed out.

[Amy Baleski]

Like the.

[Bonnie]

With my dad.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Oh, I know. And that's. That's natural. Do you want to know how to be in the present moment?

[Bonnie]

I would love to.

[Amy Baleski]

You ready? Yeah. Okay, do it. Okay, so focus. Just right now, focus on what the mic looks like. I'm just kidding. There you go. Grab it and lick it. No, no, just focus on what? The mic. And then take a deep breath in, breathe out. Just focus on that, not on anything else that's going around you. Boom. You're in the present moment.

[Bonnie]

It's grounding.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Yeah. That's what I did last night. I was having a panic attack on the way to the hospital, and I leaned forward into the vents, and I was just like, what can I look at? So I had my water, my trusty fucking water bot. You guys need to sponsor me. Mount Mountain Valley spring water. They do.

[Amy Baleski]

They're everywhere.

[Bonnie]

Literally.

[Amy Baleski]

Boom.

[Bonnie]

They're lit. They're littered everywhere in our fucking bus. And I just focused on my bottle, and I just did my. My breathing and stuff like that.

[Amy Baleski]

Good job.

[Bonnie]

Thank you so much. So let's rewind it back to your childhood. Okay. So you went through the cancer thing. You were. You started realizing that you had, you know, this gift at a young age. Your mom and your sister weren't tapped into theirs.

[Amy Baleski]

No.

[Bonnie]

At all.

[Amy Baleski]

No.

[Bonnie]

They were just hanging out in their meat suits.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Yeah. Everybody goes, oh, my God. Did you have people that were, you know, mediums in your line? So so everybody said, no, no, no, no, no. Right. And that was another thing. And we didn't realize until I was probably about 17 when we got this fun little diary from my dad's grandmother over in Russia. Anyways, we're Russian Jews, so they. My aunt, I guess you'd say decoded essentially, or like changed it in English. Right. And we found out that she was called a white witch.

[Bonnie]

Wow.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes. But this was back in 1888.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

So that is the only sign that we have from that.

[Bonnie]

Wow.

[Amy Baleski]

That's it.

[Bonnie]

I feel like it was so prominent back in the day. I feel like everybody now. It's starting to be like a cool thing to be a witch nowadays. But for a while there it was very hush hush. And a lot of witches, like Stevie Nicks, she's been a witch for a long time but couldn't talk about it. Still doesn't talk about it. She's an og, but it's like, I feel like it was so hush hush back then. And that's when it was like prominent.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, correct. You know why, though? Because we didn't have as much stuff to do. So we had that time to focus and calm down and breathe and feel and realize you're connected to everything.

[Bonnie]

So take me, keep taking me on this journey of your childhood.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay, so five years old, had cancer. Had fun. Had. I mean, that was it, right? Had fun. You can only deal with it with sarcasm. So. Had chemotherapy for two years. Yeah. Lost the whole hair thing. I mean, the whole nine yards.

[Bonnie]

I was actually such a young age. That's a lot of trauma.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, it was. It was. But made it. I made it through and it was good. Then my best friend ended up getting it. That at the same time. We're actually in the hospital at the same time.

[Bonnie]

Oh, my God.

[Amy Baleski]

And then. Oh, I know. He ended up dying from it.

[Bonnie]

Oh my God.

[Amy Baleski]

And so he has kind of like been around me for forever. It's weird. You just kind of like see things, experience.

[Bonnie]

Maybe he was one of your spirit guides and just came to visit.

[Amy Baleski]

That that was probably one of the things. And you know, I guess until about 10, it's all just kind of normal after that. I don't. I mean, there was. I don't really recall a whole lot. And it wasn't until I was around 11 when I started having those things where, you know, you talk about it and then it happens. Right. Or you have these things where you think about a person and they show up.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, that happens to me all the time now. Ask Mimi it's crazy. I predict so much that goes down.

[Amy Baleski]

Because we're all in line with it.

[Bonnie]

Or I literally will say, I want this and it happens.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Do you know what that is?

[Bonnie]

Manifestation.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. So. So do you know how it works?

[Bonnie]

Well, I mean, I just say I want shit and it fucking happens. But I believe it.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes.

[Bonnie]

And that's what I tell everybody. I'm like, before I even had a hit podcast, when Mimi and I first started, I was like, I'm going to have my own radio show. I'm gonna be the female Howard Stern. I'm gonna, you know, which with that trajectory is kind of curved a little bit. Cause of the whole me too movement, you know, stuff like that.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely.

[Bonnie]

So the Howard Stern isn't who I aspire to be. But it's like, I'm gonna have my own radio show. I'm gonna get millions of downloads. I'm gonna chart. Da da da da. It all happens. And I really believed it.

[Amy Baleski]

No, it's belief. And it's because your heart aligned with it, your soul aligned with it, and then the universe reflected it back to you.

[Bonnie]

Yeah. No, it's amazing.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. I like it. That's how it works. That's how this works. That's how you work. That's how he works. Yeah. You know, all of it. We're all here because of that. So back to childhood, then. I didn't really have, as I can recall, not a lot of crazy things happening. I mean, in the midst of all of this, you know, cancer, blah, blah, blah. We didn't know I had this, but I used to walk around and my kneecaps would dislocate and my hips would dislocate, and I just got goosebumps. I was weird. And I was never able to be in sports or anything like that. And getting to be about 16, I had my second near death experiences. And then I started really channeling for, like, people at my school, people in my high school, teachers and stuff like that.

[Bonnie]

What was your second near death experience?

[Amy Baleski]

I had bacterial meningitis. And it went up and, you know, it causes swelling in the brain. Right. And so anyways, I went into the hospital, coded, you know, stayed there for four or five days, came out, and I just began channeling for people. And I grew up in Pasadena. So what was there a lot of. There was a lot of shootings. Right. There was a lot of people dying. Car wrecks, you know, all these crazy things. Yep. Gangs and so where my sister lives. Yeah. Oh, see? Yeah, you get it. And so I would go around and I would read for the family or I would read for the teachers who lost their family. Yeah, like 16, 17, 18.

[Bonnie]

Were you charging people or.

[Amy Baleski]

No, I was just doing it. I was just doing it for free because I didn't understand it. And so gradually people started coming to me.

[Bonnie]

Like, hey, Amy, do you think whenever you coded that. Did you. Can you remember anything from that?

[Amy Baleski]

I can't remember from that one. No. I just remember getting out of it and having the profound feeling of like, oneness. That was it. It was just almost like I.

[Bonnie]

Was it peaceful?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, it's very peaceful. Oh, I'll get to one about dying, like, and how it felt like the whole nine yards. That's number four, though.

[Bonnie]

And that's the last one. Oh, there's a whole cat.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, I am a cat. Yes. Yeah, yeah, exactly. No, it's, it's, it's weird. And so that, that was one of the things. And then we move forward. I get married, I have my child, I'm 20. I get married.

[Bonnie]

So 16, you're doing readings for everybody. Everything's okay.

[Amy Baleski]

You be.

[Bonnie]

Beat the meningitis.

[Amy Baleski]

I beat the meningitis.

[Bonnie]

Graduated from school. Did you stay in school?

[Amy Baleski]

Yep. Graduated from high school, went to college, finished my associates. Met a guy, my first husband, got married to him, told him what I did. He told me it was evil.

[Bonnie]

I was gonna say, how is it dating people? Being a spiritual advisor, psychic, medium?

[Amy Baleski]

Well, we happen to have somebody right over here that can tell you all about it.

[Bonnie]

We'll get to him soon. But like, does it freak dudes out? Are they like, no, I do not want to deal with this.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay. So that I, I was back then, you know, I didn't fully know it, I was doing it, but they didn't really get it either, right? And when I would do it, I wouldn't do it with them in the room because it's, it's kind of, you know, you do it with your client. Right. That sounds weird when I say that. But anyway, you know what I'm saying?

[Bonnie]

I've done it with clients.

[Amy Baleski]

I've done it. I know, right? Me. I know, I know. So I would tell them and they'd be like, oh, okay, cool. You know, you're like a 17 year old boy, whatever. But my ex husband, he grew up, he was half African American and half Thai. And so they grew up in a very Southern Baptist, Louisiana family. And so they would tell me I was going to go to hell for it. And I'm like, how can you do this and go to hell if it's the next thing that. Gone. Like, it just never made sense to me. If it's all about love and that's what it is, why are we putting.

[Bonnie]

The fear into it?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, exactly. And it's helping people, and it's helping me, too. At the same time, I feel like.

[Bonnie]

Jesus kind of was like that in a way.

[Amy Baleski]

Jesus was. That. Jesus was a higher. Came into a body. He was God. Came into a body. Everybody's God that's in a body. Okay. Even you. That's why we create. Anyways, so he came into a body, he started aligning himself with light and realizing what it was, realizing what all this stuff was. And then Pontius Pilate was like, hey, I want you to be a part of, like, this Roman thing, and I want you to love Zeus. And he was like, no, I'm not. And then the Jews were like, hey, I need you to do it this way. You're making us run out of money. Right? Because everybody starts moving on with the whole Jesus thing, and they said we just got to nix them. And that's what they. You know, that's what they did.

[Bonnie]

It's kind of like what the government does to people now.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's a whole.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, there's a whole nother podcast.

[Amy Baleski]

I know. That's a whole. Oh, I can. We could talk about that. That's a whole other area. But, you know, I met him, and he really didn't care for it. But at that time, he ended up going to the Air Force, and I. Yeah. And I moved with him, and I became kind of like the resident Air Force medium. So I would go and I would read for everybody. And anyways, in the meantime, I ended up having my kid, and then I ended up starting to have a lot of issues.

[Bonnie]

It's okay.

[Amy Baleski]

It's okay. A lot of issues, and I didn't know why.

[Bonnie]

What kind of issues?

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, bad ones. Like, my vagina falling out of my body. Like, bad. Like, bad.

[Bonnie]

And this is after you gave birth.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, after I had a kid. Like, have you ever sneezed and your asshole falls out? Like, that's a whole nother thing. Okay.

[Bonnie]

I can't wait for those times.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, just wait.

[Bonnie]

Oh, are there any diaper? I had to make you laugh.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

There any fucking diaper sponsors? Because we can. I'm just gonna. I'm gonna manifest a diaper sponsorship.

[Amy Baleski]

No, please. Yes. No. You put on a glove and you shove it back in anyways. Like, these crazy things, and So I started going to doctors and they were like, oh, you're too young for all this. You're like 23. So I started doing all this research and I was like, I started thinking, I was like, why is it that my kneecaps pop out? Why is it that I have this crazy stretchy skin? Why is it that all of my joints bend backwards? Right? This doesn't make any sense. Why is it that all this stuff is happening to me? And I ended up being my own advocate. You had to be. Uh huh. I ended up being my own advocate and I wrote everything down and I went to my primary care manager after like 3 years and I said, look, this is, this is what's going on.

[Bonnie]

Pay attention, lady.

[Amy Baleski]

That's exactly. That was it. And I said, we need to get me to a geneticist now. And so a year later, after that, they diagnosed me with a thing called Ehlers Danlos syndrome. It's connective tissue disorder.

[Bonnie]

Say it slower one more time.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, Ehlers Danlos syndrome. It's a connective tissue disorder. So you lack the gene that creates mitochondria, so you have a mitochondria defect. So all of your genes that create collagen don't work. So you're born with collagen, but it can never reconstitute itself effectively. And so that means that all of your connective tissue, including your organs, your veins, your bones, everything, is essentially like rubber. And it falls apart like very easily and it's super, super tender. And so anyways, when I found that out, I had 26 surgeries to save my life. Oh my goodness. In like the next five years. What kind of surgeries do they do? Got everything. So this segues in. So I had, I ended up not being able to breathe very well. Like a thing with like autonomic nervous system where I just couldn't catch my breath. I started getting really dizzy. I was having these insane headaches my entire life. I couldn't figure out why my eyes would bulge out of my head. It was terrible. And I was like, oh, it's just headaches. Well, I ended up finding out because of Ehlers Danlos syndrome, I have a thing called Chiari malformation. So it's where your head squeezes your brain and your brain essentially gets pooped down into your neck. And so it kills your brain stem essentially. And so you lose the ability to walk, you lose the ability to breathe. And if they don't do surgery, then you essentially die. That's it. I got to a point where I couldn't walk anymore. And I was in a wheelchair, so. I was in a wheelchair for about two and a half years because. And you have to cath. I got out of a speeding ticket that way. It was very. We'll talk about that.

[Bonnie]

But my pussy hole.

[Amy Baleski]

That's exactly what it was. I was like, I gotta pee. They're like, ma' am, you're going fast. I'm like, I know. And I showed him my calf. I was like, I can't go anywhere anyways, this whole thing. But. But yeah, I ended up going in and I. It was. My birthday gift to myself, was brain surgery to have that fixed when I was 26. And so I went in two days after my birthday, hashtag Scorpios. And yeah, two days after my birthday, I had the surgery. And it went well. They essentially take like a. A golf ball size of your skull away and they put a patch there and they lift everything up and they take out your first and second vertebrae. So if you notice that I'm like, turning. That's why. Because it's hard for me to turn my neck.

[Bonnie]

So do you have, like a soft spot back?

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'll show you the whole thing. Yeah, it's all. It's all open back here.

[Bonnie]

And I broke my C1 vertebrae. That's crazy that they just take those out.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Huh? The first one. Yeah. And they, like, they. They fuse it.

[Bonnie]

That's a dangerous surgery.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

That's like, not one for the faint of heart. You could have never walked again.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Yeah. Or. Or like, been alive because of all the pressure. And so everything goes great. And because of my illness, what I have, my tissues don't heal properly, so they take like two or three times longer. So I told my neurosurgeon, I said, I mean, anytime you go in for a surgery upstate. Look, guys, I have this. We got to take special precaution. And they go, okay, cool, right? This guy didn't. So a week later, he took out my stitches and I went. I drove. This happened in Alabama, and my parents took me back to Houston so I could heal, because it's going to be like a eight week healing thing. And so I'm laying in bed and I'm just getting sicker and sicker. Like, I can't see. And I've never had brain surgery before. You don't know. You're like, okay, you're in pain, maybe you have nausea, whatever. You don't know.

[Bonnie]

Like your brain's adjusting.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, your brain's. And that's we called them. They're like, oh, you're gonna be okay. It's fine. Blah, blah, blah. Anyways, so three weeks later, my mom, it was during the holidays and it was their first day back. My mom's the teacher. Hashtag teachers. My mom went back to school. And I'm laying in our guest bedroom and I'm asleep and I wake up and I remember like being very dazed. It almost felt like this, like, like you can't really see anything, you know? And I was like, oh. And I was like, like, wow, why am I wet? This doesn't make any sense. And so I get up and I look and all of my pillow and all of my back and all of my shirt is wet. And my brain incision had opened up and with every heartbeat I had CSF fluid gushing out of my head. Oh my God, it was so terrifying. The first thing I did was call an ambulance. And they were like, we won't be able to get you to the hospital quick enough. Like it was going to be 45.

[Bonnie]

Medical system.

[Amy Baleski]

That's, that's what they said. We'll be there in 45 minutes. You have to go down. Like they were. I called my doctor, they wanted me to go downtown Houston. We lived, like I said, in the east side of town. They said it was going to take too long. I called my mom, she rushed home, they wrapped me up in a robe, they throw me in the car. My poor 80 year old father. And like we're driving down there and I just remember looking out the window, like with my face like, okay, this is great. And like everything's kind of like shutting down. And we get in there and they roll me in and I remember just sitting there and I'm freezing. Why? Because I have this crazy infection. And I told the doctors, I was like, please don't send me home. And they bring me to the back and everybody rushes in. And they couldn't give me any medicine because my blood pressure and everything was so low. And they go, okay, we're gonna have to turn you to the side and put this tube in your spine to get out this infection. You can't have any lidocaine or anything. And as they do that, the stress. I'm laying on my side. Here's the like heartbeat monitor over here, right? I'm laying on my side. They do that. I can feel the pain and everything shocks. And it starts going down and it starts going down and it starts going down. And I'm watching my heartbeat and my pulse go down from like, 120 down to 40, down to 30. This is the weird thing. While I'm laying there watching this, I hear everybody screaming, Coding, coding, coding. And then all of a sudden, my vision goes like this. It's not looking at that, it's looking down above.

[Bonnie]

I've heard that about from so many people.

[Amy Baleski]

And I didn't hear anything. It was quiet.

[Bonnie]

Was it peaceful?

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, my God, this is so weird. I might cry for this one. It was so weird. You're looking down, you're seeing all this. You. You look at your body. And the only thing I could think of was, I hope my mom knows that I love her. And I remember going out and seeing what book she was reading. It was a Nicholas Sparks book because they're not going to go out there and tell her, right. That her daughter's dying. Right? And so I remember seeing the. The little swing set on the front of it, and I remember feeling just. Just fucking bliss. It was so great. And then I wake up, and I'd been in a coma for two weeks.

[Bonnie]

Wow.

[Amy Baleski]

And I woke up and I have all this crap all over me. And they were like, oh, my God, are you okay? And I'm just opening my eyes, you know, like, completely plastered, and it was just. It was insane. And then after that, I was in there for another two months. And after that, I remember getting out of that hospital. It was very interesting because my room that I was in for two months, there was a window, but there was a window that faced the brick wall. So you're in this room for two months. It's very interesting. We're here right now.

[Bonnie]

It's very triggering, right?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, very triggering. And I remember getting in the corner car and going on the way home, and I was sitting in the car. And I remember having so much compassion for everything. I was like, oh, my God, Mr. Hobo, you are one. Like, the grass was, like, hyper green. The sky was high. Everything was just so intense and beautiful. And at that point, like, just started getting really weird after that. Like, I mean, all the other ones were just, like, nothing compared to this thing. And I. I mean, I read everybody. I read everybody, and it just kept going, and it still hasn't stopped. So that.

[Bonnie]

Do you think that he keeps saving you for a reason?

[Amy Baleski]

I mean, I'm here with you right now, right? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

I. I think that they're like, this is your journey. This is your mission.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, yeah, this is my journey. This is my mission. So you asked me, you're like, oh, you went through cancer, you know, and you just kind of glaze over that. Well, because it's been much more crazy after that.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

Like, this was sanity, the. The big thing. And. And after that, I showed appreciation, I showed love. I mean, I. I see how everything comes in alignment. I see how anything that you want, including that thing sitting over there, came into my alignment. I mean, you. Everything. I mean, you can have anything you want.

[Bonnie]

Absolutely.

[Amy Baleski]

If you just put your mind to it, you know?

[Bonnie]

That's so heavy. I can't believe you've been through all that and you're still just so upbeat and positive. A lot of people would let that.

[Amy Baleski]

I know. Life's too short to be shitty.

[Bonnie]

Derail them. Yeah, absolutely.

[Amy Baleski]

It is.

[Bonnie]

So you wake up out of this thing, you start reading for everybody. Do you stay in the marriage? Were you.

[Amy Baleski]

He was hanging out with the babysitter while I was having brain surgery. Let's just say that I ended up finding that out. Got home, like, six months later, and I looked at him. I was like, this isn't for us. Like, nothing aligned. And so I left him with my son and a bag of clothes. I left our house, our three car. I mean, our two cars, everything. And I moved back to Houston, and I was still in a wheelchair, by the way, when I came back. Okay. Because I still had multiple surgeries to finish up with, like, my ab dripping. I mean, you name it. There's just a ton of stuff, but I left. And I remember getting back home to Houston, and I said, I don't know how I'm gonna do it, but I'm gonna be something. And that was, what, six years ago?

[Bonnie]

And you were ready. You were just like, this is it. I'm gonna change the trajectory of my life and just use it for good, higher purpose.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. And now we're here.

[Bonnie]

Yeah. I love that. So you get back, you're single.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

On Tinder.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, I wasn't. I wasn't on Tinder. I was at really nice steakhouse bars. Let's just say that.

[Bonnie]

What were you doing? Nothing really nice. You were staking out the.

[Amy Baleski]

I was staking.

[Bonnie]

Selection of meat.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, exactly.

[Bonnie]

You're looking for that prime grade A cut.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, absolutely. All the Sergios. All of them. Yeah. No, I. I got back and I decided I got a job as I was doing my mediumship, but I got a job as the God. We. General manager for a really, really big day spa. And I met a lot of really cool women there that kind of, like, were having their own business. And we kind of all got together and just had a really good time.

[Bonnie]

And people underestimate having a big camaraderie of women.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

When you have women that you guys can support each other, it's such a good feeling.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, yeah.

[Bonnie]

Well, you guys can talk together, you guys can build together, like.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes.

[Bonnie]

It's like a family.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, it is. Well. And. And it's. When you, I guess you say it's hard for, like, people like you and me, Right. Because you tend to be. I don't want to say this in a bad way, but you tend to be the alpha. Right. Kind of, in a way. And so it's hard to find women that are also in that. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

And so I'm surrounded by all alpha women.

[Amy Baleski]

I know. And so when you find them, you just click and you stay together. And. And yeah. So I. I got back, I was doing my mediumship. I was working there. It was wonderful. And then I started dating and I dated like 26 people in six months. And it was great.

[Bonnie]

Speed dating.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, Very. Well, I speed date. I mean, they didn't have to know about each other, Right? It was a whole thing. Yes.

[Bonnie]

It was always, like, looking for love in all the wrong places. Or you were just like, you know what, dude, I just almost died. I just got out of a marriage. I am ready to just fucking last new stitched up vagina, fucking get to work.

[Amy Baleski]

That nobody knew I had a baby. Nobody knew.

[Bonnie]

And also, do they just stitch it all up, you know?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. So what they do, it's called a seal. I believe it's called a celio coloplexy. And so what they do is I.

[Bonnie]

Had these words, so smart and like, just like, it's nothing.

[Amy Baleski]

I have to be very educated on these things, right. Otherwise I die. But I had. I had a hysterectomy, a full hysterectomy. And then that happened. That actually had happened about two or three times. And then all of my abs, because my connective tissue disorder, they ripped open. And so they had to do all mesh anyways, the whole thing. So I was looking good. I essentially had a tummy tuck right. Myself with everything else. And I was going out and I was trying to find somebody that, like, I loved. And I was like. And I actually didn't. I knew what love was for a parent child. I knew what love was for my kid. I knew what love was for a friend. But I didn't think that love for another human being, like a romantic relationship.

[Bonnie]

Healthy.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, healthy. Was really truly out there. And so I guess I was On a core quest to find that.

[Bonnie]

Which is crazy, cuz your parents are still together, right?

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, they were. He's dead now, but. But yeah, they were. They were together for 40 years, for a very, very long time, which is really cool. But I mean, at the same time they were also an old school relationship. You know, if he. They were 20 years apart and if he said Kathy Jump, she would say yes. Right, right. It wasn't always reciprocated. There was that old 1935, like type of thing, so. But I wanted something like more. I wanted like a teammate. And so I started dating all these people and I mean everything from doctors, geneticists, to lawyers to, you know, the person that was the bar person. Right. Like all of these. And one day I just got tired of it and I sat down.

[Bonnie]

Lawyers are not easy to date them as clients. And they're. The lawyers are the worst clients ever.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, yes, they are. Yeah, they are. They think way too much and they.

[Bonnie]

Don'T want to argue about everything. Everything's a rebuttal, everything, all the time.

[Amy Baleski]

I know I'm right there with you. And I remember sitting back in my apartment and I was like, why am I doing this? I go, I need to sit here and just figure out, you know, what am I doing? And so I decided that I would just be me and my cat alone and. Yeah. And just me and him for the rest of my life. Y. Exactly. Well, I mean, dogs are too much work. Especially when you're working all the time.

[Bonnie]

You know, I love Macha.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, I know. Everybody loves him. And so I go through and I start writing down the names of each one of these people. People. And I started thinking, like, what did I like in them that I was trying to find within myself? And so I wrote down everything that I liked about each one that I couldn't find in myself.

[Bonnie]

And self reflection is amazing.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, it was hard. It's. It was hardcore. And so I thought, you know, the lawyer, what did I like? Well, I like that he was smart, that he wrote books. I liked that he was fun. I like that he didn't have to worry about money. I like that he was confident, but yet he couldn't have a conversation. Right. And he was kind of boring and he was a little childish. Why did I like the bar guy? Well, I mean, he was great. He was fun. We would dance country music in the living room at 3 o' clock in the morning. So that was great. But he was also a chronic alcoholic and he had gotten like 70 Wis and he was going to jail all the time. Like, that's not stupid. So there's all these different things. So I said, you know what? I'm just gonna do this for myself. And. And we'll see. So I decided to be a celibate lesbian with my cat for like the next nine months, essentially. Yeah. So I did that.

[Bonnie]

You have a very extreme personality. It's like one or the other.

[Amy Baleski]

It is. It's one or the other.

[Bonnie]

Well, it's very Scorpio of you.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And so I decided to be a celibate lesbian. And that's when that thing.

[Bonnie]

Well, hold on. Let's not brush over the lesbian.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, no, no. I was, I never, I've never done that. I had a lot of friends that were lesbians, but I've never been a lesbian ever. Ever.

[Bonnie]

Oh, what did you say you decided to be a celibate? What?

[Amy Baleski]

A celibate lesbian. That just means that I. I'm not gonna date any men at all.

[Bonnie]

Okay. I was like, we're not brushing over the last.

[Amy Baleski]

No, no, I never, I never have. No. But I did tell him, I said, if it happens that him and I don't work out, I will be that.

[Bonnie]

Just going, no, I. I say that to every. Well, no, I could never be a lesbian. I love penetration too much. But I do say if Jay and I don't work out, I'm going to have like 26 year old cabana boys.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, that's it.

[Bonnie]

There's emotional attachment. Don't care. Just come and bang me and leave that and leave.

[Amy Baleski]

Exactly. No, it's just going to be me and my dog.

[Bonnie]

So you decided to be a crazy cat lady lesbian.

[Amy Baleski]

Uhhuh.

[Bonnie]

And just by myself.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, just by yourself.

[Bonnie]

And how that work out?

[Amy Baleski]

It worked out great. I didn't have any worries. I. I didn't have, you know, any problems, any issues. But it was boring, right? And you know, I was reading and I love that. And I had all these friends and I had all these clients, and it was great, but it was, it was boring. And I said, you know what? I really want a partner. And so it just happened to be that. My best friend at the time, her name's Julia, she wanted to start dating again. And she says, amy, you're really good with words. And I go, yeah. She goes, I need you to make a Tinder profile for. For me. And I go, okay. She goes, but the thing is, you have to make one for you too. And I go, honey, I go, I don't need to make a Tinder profile. I can just go down the street. Like, I mean, go to pick up somebody, right? It doesn't matter. And she said, no, Amy, do it. And so I made one for her, wrote out this big thing, all these pictures. And then on mine, I put one picture and I said, I like street tacos and champagne. That was it. And anyways, I ended up getting sick again, like, a month later. I never looked at it. I didn't want to have any. I got sick again. And I got sick again.

[Bonnie]

What?

[Amy Baleski]

So because of, like, the cooter falling out and the booty falling out and stuff like that, it left me with some things. Like, you get bladder infections very easily. And then because I only have one kidney and all that was falling out, you can't feel it. And so it leads to kidney infections. And so I didn't realize I'd had a kidney infection for about a month. And I went septic, and they found me in the elevator at work, and they took me to the hospital, and I stayed there for a few weeks. And I had come out of that, and it was two days later, I picked up my phone, I'm laying in bed, and there's all these messages in Tinder, and all of them like, well, I lived again.

[Bonnie]

Let's get on Tinder.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Yes. Yeah. Well, no. So I look, because I was just curious, because I told Julia that I just wanted to delete it. Like, I was, I'm not gonna do it. It's just gonna be it. And there was one guy with one picture, and he said, hey. And he said, I like street tacos and long walks on the beach. And that was it. And so I messaged him. And. And that's my husband.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. And that's my husband.

[Bonnie]

What's hubby's name?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Oh, his name is Chris.

[Bonnie]

Hi.

[Amy Baleski]

Chris is here. Yeah. And then.

[Bonnie]

And they're so cute. Let me tell you guys, whenever I came in, he's like, reminding her to do things. Like, you guys are like your yin and yang.

[Amy Baleski]

He's my little. He's my little Taurus. Aries. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm his little Scorpio Libra. And. And the other thing is that I would not have sex with him unless first date, because I was. I have a lot of Aries in me. And so I like to go in and, like, dominate and say, haha. And then, like, walk away.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Essentially, like, I did that. And I told him. I go. He comes up and he kissed me on my forehead, and he Was like, do you want to come inside? I'm like, no, no, I can't. He goes, why not? I said, because if I have sex with you, I'll never talk to you again. And. And so we did it. We didn't do it, but for three dates. We went on three dates. And then finally I banged him.

[Bonnie]

You put in the work, huh? You had long game.

[Amy Baleski]

He did. I did have long game.

[Bonnie]

He said I came with condoms in my pocket, but I wanted to see.

[Amy Baleski]

If he would hang out with me and do all my. My weird little things. And so I. We went out to dinner, and then I took him bowling at, like, I want to see if he'd go bowling with me. And then I took him downtown Houston. We had cheesecake at 2:00 in the morning, and then I took him home.

[Bonnie]

You were looking for the romance.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, I was in for the romance.

[Bonnie]

And he deserved that.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

You had already gone through your ho phase and stuff.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, my God.

[Bonnie]

Even though he showed up with condoms, he still. Wind was romancing Bunny. Bunny, Can I. I mean, usually men are on Tinder. We know why men are on Tinder. It's not. You guys are looking for love. I know.

[Amy Baleski]

Can I tell you one of my most terrible things?

[Bonnie]

Yes, please.

[Amy Baleski]

So it was. And I don't care.

[Bonnie]

I like.

[Amy Baleski]

Wait. I like. I like to be very raw. I tell everybody this on live. Anyways, it doesn't matter. So there was this one time when. When was that it? Oh, yeah. I was going in and I was having this major surgery to put back my stomach together. Right. And they were essentially, what they were going to do is they said that they would have to take out my abs. And because of all the stuff, they'd have to take out my intestines. Like, they talked about how they would do it, right? The whole thing. And I'm sitting there, like, rearranging your body. Oh, the whole thing. And so I lived before every surgery. I essentially went yolo. Okay. You only live once because you didn't know if it was gonna come back. Like, bad shit would happen. And so there's this one time before what I think was one of my last surgeries that all of my old high school friends, we all went up, met up, we all went to a country bar and I did cocaine and wrote a bull. It was just. I would. Sorry.

[Bonnie]

And it was just like, I'm going out with a bang.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, that was it. That. That was it. And I was like, oh, my God, what are you doing?

[Bonnie]

What are you starting Eyeballs to the face many a times.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, yes. And so they were like, hey, ma' am. Like, oh, my God, we got to do it. Like, you're only going to live once. And then that was it.

[Bonnie]

I can't with somebody who has had brain surgery. Like, here, Here's a line. I never do that to you.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, no, I know, I know, I know, I know. But that was a choice. That was a choice. It wasn't a whole line. It was just. It was a little bit like in the bathroom on a credit card.

[Bonnie]

I love it.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

At least you didn't do the pinky nail. I used to just always do the pinky nail.

[Amy Baleski]

See, because. Yeah, I know, I get it, I get it. But, yeah, we're. And then that's how I started talking to dead people.

[Bonnie]

So you're married now.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. And three years. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Let's talk about when you first got on TikTok, because as tick Tock kind of changed the. Yeah. The. Your whole, like, situation. Right.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

I didn't want to say life, because, I mean, you've lived a full life.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot.

[Bonnie]

You've been through a lot of. When you first got on Tick Tock, you were doing cooking videos.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. So.

[Bonnie]

Because I've been. I've known of you for a while.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. So I. I first. I love to cook. I'm a musician. I love playing. I create. Creating anything creative. Right. Because it's all from the soul. Right. And so I was on there and I didn't see anybody doing cooking videos at that point. So I said, you know what? I'm going to cook my interesting recipes that I do because technically I'm like half Mexican. Right. Because I grew up in Pasadena. All of my boys friends were from Mexico, and I only ate Mexican food, like, and I sang and played in a. Praise and worship.

[Bonnie]

Teams are Mexican because my sister lives in Pasadena.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes. Yeah, that's exactly. So Tango La Camisa Negra was like my, you know, main theme song. But. But I didn't see anybody making it. And so I started making food and I started getting a following while I'm still doing my mediumship. And it was probably like a year into it and I had this essentially like a knowing. And it said, you need to go and talk to people about this. And I was like, right now? Yeah. I mean, that's essentially what it was. I was like. I was like, why? You know, there's this thing of like, you need to go talk to people. I was like, no, because what do I do. You come out, you say, hey, I'm going to talk. I talk to dead people. How do you think people react? They either call you stupid, they tell you you're idiotic, they tell you it's wrong, they tell you they want to help. Yes. Or they want something from you. Yeah, one or the other. And so it was more like, you know, signing something away, saying, okay, accept all these. Right. And so I made a video in October of 2019, and I said, hey, I also do this, and I will share with you everything that I've learned. And boom. And then from that point, I was just cooking medium. Cooking medium. Cooking medium. And then two years ago, it got to a point where I was doing brand deals. I was doing all of my sessions, I was doing all my meditations. I mean, you name it, I was cooking. I was winning cooking competitions. And with my chronic illness, I was dying. Like, dying, because I'm working seven days a week, you know, 20 hour days, getting four hours of sleep, and I looked at my husband and I thought I was gonna say, prayed, prayed long and hard. And I said, what should I do? Should I stay with this or should I do with this? And everything just said, go. In the mediumship, just drop. Not drop, cooking. And I did. And I read the spirit of Aaron Carter in January. I mean, and I'm hanging out with NSYNC now. I. I.

[Bonnie]

So crazy.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Yeah. So apparently I made the right choice. Yeah, right. Absolutely.

[Bonnie]

Now you're, like, always booked out, like, people.

[Amy Baleski]

You.

[Bonnie]

I've watched you explode, you know, over the past, like, year and a half.

[Amy Baleski]

Almost, it's gotten crazy. And I think it's because it's raw. Right.

[Bonnie]

And it's real. And you're honest with people.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

You know, and I think you're. I think teaching them, too, is another way of them, like, because a lot of people don't want to give away their secrets. So for you to, like, want to teach people, too. I think that intrigues people because everybody wants to.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

You know, Know how to see spirits.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

Well, I don't, because I see them all the time.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

I don't want to. I don't even want to deal with it. I'm like one of those people who pushes it away.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

I don't want to deal with it.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, I mean, but this is the whole thing, too. If you're pushing it away, it's gonna try to hit you harder.

[Bonnie]

So when I went through a really tough time, probably, I'd say like last year, maybe a Year before that, I was seeing, like. I've always seen ghosts and shit since I was little.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Spirits. Black energy. A lot of black energy is always around me for some reason.

[Amy Baleski]

Mm.

[Bonnie]

And finally last year, I just got to the point where I was so tired of just being scared of it. I was like, come on. Like, I don't care. I was just like, just, you're welcome here anytime. Just leave me alone. And I don't see him anymore. Ever since I just gave in to that and was just like, I don't care anymore. I don't care that you're floating over here. I don't care that you're over here.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Do you know why? Because you don't have fear.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Fear is the lowest vibration. They do. The lower vibration feeds off of fear. Why do you think people keep pushing fear in the media? Fear and everything? Because if they keep you low, you know, you never truly know what you are. Right. You're never really living the light.

[Bonnie]

So if somebody were to do a class with you, like, what is, like, essentially an overview of a session with you to learn how to start reading? Stuff like that.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay, so I do my classes, right? So I have my thing right now. It's called Introduction to Channeling course. And then I have my advanced course. You have to take the introduction one. And essentially, I have these people that are coming in, and, you know, they have been experiencing things. They're seeing the synchronicities. They. They are understanding that there's more to this, Right? They see how it all kind of, like, goes together collectively. And so you're coming in, and you're trying to teach them how to open up their senses, because that's, number one, what you have to do. So, like, one of the things that I would do first off, Sorry, I don't have my syllabus in front of me right now, is I would say, okay, I want you to go and, you know, sit in your bedroom. Sit in your bedroom quietly and just feel what it feels like. What do I mean by feel? Like, if we sit here quietly, this room has a certain feel about it. Okay. And I want you to compare it to. How does the room at your house feel? Feel like you can put your mind there. How does it feel? Well, this room feels different than that room. Right? Well, what is that? That's this. That's spirit. That's. That's you feeling the energy around it. Okay, so you do that. Then I want you to go to a busy grocery store. What does that feel like? I want you to go to cemetery. What does that feel like? I want you to feel the differences, Okay. I want you to go back to your bedroom. I want you to start thinking of your dead grandmother. I want you to call her in and then I want you to feel your room. Right. Well, you will feel that it's different, okay? Because she's there. It'll almost be like there's not an emptiness anymore.

[Bonnie]

Do spirits always come if you call them?

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, absolutely. Yes.

[Bonnie]

Because you're always them. Or is it. Could it be another person?

[Amy Baleski]

No, I mean. I mean, there's spirits around you all the time. But remember, your thoughts, your feelings, your emotions, even your words are all energy and we're connected. See, the words that I'm using right now, it's the. It's the best way I can describe something that's non physical. So please just, just go with it. So we're all connected by. What I can understand so far is like a web, okay. When you get into connection with somebody, like when I get in connection with him or with you, whatever it may be, their thoughts, their feelings, their emotions or their wants, you can kind of like feel them, right? So maybe he's in another room and he has this big want of like wanting a Dr. Pepper. And then all of a sudden I think, oh my God, I should go get Dr. Pepper's for us, right? So I bring it back and he goes, oh, I had no idea. Yeah, I was just thinking about that. That's the web. Because you're connected just like the other day, right? I sent you that, you know, I. You and I had that phone conversation, and then all of a sudden I get in my car, I'm going to the mall, and there's a car in front of me with a license plate bunny.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

How weird, right? That's not weird. That's because it was brought into that. So anyway, so spirits use that line to connect. Because whether you have a physical body or not, that is still there. That connection is love. And so when you think about them, that essentially like tings that vibration, like hitting a guitar string, and they show up, right? And remember, I want you to think about how the spirit world is. So it's you here, okay? The spirit world is all around, okay. So then they can just interject, interject, interject, interject. And so that's how they work. Yeah, that's how they work.

[Bonnie]

When you read Aaron Carter, for those of you guys who don't follow Amy on TikTok, which you should.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

When you connected with him, can we talk about that.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, yeah, of course.

[Bonnie]

How did that go?

[Amy Baleski]

So of course I don't like to know anything about anybody.

[Bonnie]

Right, right.

[Amy Baleski]

Like, and the whole thing is when you go into a session, obviously I knew who I was going to channel.

[Bonnie]

Right, right.

[Amy Baleski]

And so I.

[Bonnie]

His family authorized it, right?

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, yeah. Well, I was reading his sister. His sister and Nick and so. Or sister at first. And so I go in there and I start calling him forward. What do I do? I just sit there quietly. I get in the moment and I start saying, Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, come here, come here, come here. And you can feel that there's a difference in the room now on that feeling, how they feel. That depends on where, where they're at in the spirit world. Okay, and what do I mean by that? The spirit world is from. The best way I can explain a non physical place to a physical reality is it's almost like a really tall apartment building. Okay. Everybody's in the apartment building, but not everybody's on the same floor. Okay, but everybody knows that everybody lives in this apartment building, but not everybody's talking to everybody.

[Bonnie]

Okay, One American Horror Story Hotel.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, yes, yes. Over there in la. Absolutely, absolutely. And so when you call in, you know, each floor feels different. There's high vibration. Let's talk about Jesus, God, Mary, all that stuff. And then there's very, very low, which is essentially like where Hitler would go, something like that.

[Bonnie]

People consider Hell.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, hell, exactly. So I.

[Bonnie]

Is there a purgatory?

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, absolutely. So I go through and I feel him. And the first thing that I feel is somebody. I get visions in my head and it's like somebody walking around smoking a cigarette. Anxiety. Where would they be?

[Bonnie]

Lower.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, yeah. Why? Why? So for me, I have found a pattern that when spirits are in the middle vibration, it's because they've either either they're waiting because they got murdered, like something happened and they're trying to like help the family. Because the middle vibration is where we're at too. We are in the middle vibration. Okay, why is that? Well, because we have the choice to do good or we have the choice to do bad. Okay, so we're here in the middle. And so that's also why most of these, we're going to go back to Aaron too. But that's why most of these, when you talk about ghosts or I felt really sad or I think my boyfriend that unalived himself is around me, it's because. Yes, he is, because he's in this vibration with you, that purgatory Area, that middle vibration from when I get visions of it, it's like here, but everything's gray. Like there's no color. That's the best way I can describe it. And there's anxiety. A lot of people are smoking. They walk around, bottles of booze. It's a whole thing. It's a very middle thing. And so he shows up and he's there, and I look at angel, and I was like. I said, I think he's in the middle vibration. She goes, well, we don't really know how he died yet. You know, obviously, they knew the bathtub, right. But I keep going and I keep channeling him. And he talks about drowning. He talks about drowning. And he keeps saying, it's. It's my fault. It's my fault. And he shows me drugs. And I said, do we know if he passed of, you know, this or this? She goes, well, we're not sure yet, right. Because the whole autopsy hadn't come out yet. And so I go, it's weird. I said, I think there's something involved with drowning. It's almost like he takes something. He has, like, the seizure or something, and then he drowns. And she goes, oh, okay. And he's talking to her. He's trying to connect with her. She's in a state of grief because it's only one month after her poor brother died. He's trying to come through and help because that's what they do in order to move up to a higher vibration. They help you. They become your guide. That's what they do. Okay. Anyways, we'll get into that a second. And so flash forward it. It was an amazing session. We had a lot of closure. We had a lot of clarity. And flash. Month. Three. Three months later, she sends me the autopsy report. He drowned. And it was from huffing this and taking too much Xanax. And he essentially had this seizure. Wow.

[Bonnie]

And I didn't know that was his cause of death. I did know he drowned, but I didn't know that it was. That he had a seizure.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, it goes into. Because of how when you do this, when you huff the stuff, it causes that reaction in your brain. Right.

[Bonnie]

With everything else, it was Xanax.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. So it adds that. And so. Poor Bunny. And he. He felt so bad. He felt so bad for what he did, but he was in a good space. He was okay.

[Bonnie]

And he was a very tormented soul.

[Amy Baleski]

He was. He was a very tormented soul. But he was so sweet. And he shows up in my life a lot. Yeah. And I'LL I'll show you that, actually, while we're here. So just so you can see. So there are times where Aaron Carter will show up with me in my bath bathroom, and I will.

[Bonnie]

This is stay away from bathtub.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. No, And I. That may be a reason why he does. But no. He shows up with me in my bathroom, and when I message his sister, she is actively doing something for him. When that happens, every single time he shows up, he plays the I Want Candy song in my head. And I text her, I'll, like, get out of the shower. And I'll text her, I'll say, you know, what is up with this? So here I have all these different things. Hang on, let me show you.

[Bonnie]

Does this ever trip you out when, like, this happens? Are you used to it now? Yeah, yeah. He's like, we're used to it now.

[Amy Baleski]

So this was back on July 17th. I sent her I was learning about AIDS and the AIDS epidemic, and turns out I ended up channeling two people that day with aids. Anyways, very interesting. Everything happens for a reason. I said, I'm learning about the new things with Ehlers Danlos syndrome and aids. I said, I look. I said, looked up what popped up on YouTube. It was a video of Aaron Carter. And I said, watch what they say about Leslie, her sister. And they were talking about that. I said, that means something is going on today with you. And she says, amy, I'm digging up old photos of my family. They specifically requested some of Leslie for an interview that I'm doing. She's sitting at the table.

[Bonnie]

Wow. Yep. That's crazy.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay.

[Bonnie]

Part of that web that you're talking about.

[Amy Baleski]

That's the web. That's the web. And I said, I was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. She. She goes, I'm doing a big interview for People magazine. Okay. And then we talk about nervousness of it. Then right after that, I get on my discord. I have a. I have a big family of discord people that follow me on there. We have almost 2,000 people on there. And the first thing I open it up and the first thing that says is Amy Bileski, has Aaron reached out to you recently? Yeah, it was at that exact same.

[Bonnie]

Time he's talking to you?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, it happens at least once a month. And I have it all documented. It's all documented.

[Bonnie]

He just feels safe with you, probably.

[Amy Baleski]

He does. Well, and it's interesting. So their birthday is December 7th. My ex husband is December 7th. Like, so this, like, December 7th vibe, like, comes into play somehow. To mine's November 7th, but that's the web I'm talking about. Okay. And that's how spirits come through.

[Bonnie]

So real quick question. When people pass, and they are. Because let's go into that a little bit. People pass and they're in the lower vibration. They can work their way up.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, yeah. You're not so. So many people go, oh, my God, are they so stuck? Are they stuck? No.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

Nobody's stuck. Nobody's ever stuck. And there's a lot of times when I see people that are in this middle vibration, whether they. Can we say suicide? Are we going to do unalive?

[Bonnie]

No, you can.

[Amy Baleski]

I can. Okay. Whether they passed up suicide or a drug overdose or got murdered. And we can talk about all the different types and then how they feel. Because there's probably going to be a lot of people watching this that. I mean, especially with the fentanyl stuff going around right now.

[Bonnie]

Crazy.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, it's insane. That's a whole nother thing. But when. When they cross the over, they can move up. And a lot of times, if it's like the drug overdose, like fentanyl and it was the first time they weren't a drug addict or anything like that, they just go up to the light like that. They go up to a higher vibration. But if they have been doing it and like, they took away from their family or themselves, they weren't being the light. They weren't being in the best version of themselves. And they kept doing it and then they passed away. Right. They let themselves become that lower emotional state. Then that's where they go. Right. And so when they get over there, what they have to do is they have to help the people that they hurt the most. So they help their kid, they help their mom.

[Bonnie]

So karma, it's like creeping.

[Amy Baleski]

It is. It is karma. And they hang around with people and they'll show them all the signs. I mean, everything. Anything that you want, all you have to do is ask them for help. That's all you have to do. You have to allow them into your space and you have to ask them for it.

[Bonnie]

That's crazy. But I think that's comforting for some people to know that.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. And then with. With people that. Do you want to get creepy?

[Bonnie]

Yes.

[Amy Baleski]

Can I. Can I tell you a couple creepy stories and I'll talk. People really like me when I talk about hell, too, for some reason. Like, that's. And I don't know why.

[Bonnie]

I think it's because everybody's fucking scared of it.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, it will scare.

[Bonnie]

Like a morbid curiosity.

[Amy Baleski]

It is scary. I don't know. Today I was getting ready, and I was like, oh, I should talk to the story or tell Bunny about the story. So let me tell you about one of them. So this is about the middle vibration. So there was this one time that I was reading this girl, this woman, and she was sitting down. Remember, all of my things are online. So all of my sessions are online. And so she's sitting down. She has her phone right here. And all I can see is that she has tile behind her. That's it. And she's wanting to channel this woman named Jenna. And I begin bringing her forward. I'm channeling Jenna, and it's weird because I begin to feel the coldness of the tile on my back. And I was like, odd. I said, I think she's in this room with you. And she goes, like, laughs about it a second. And so I keep calling her. I was like, jenna, what's up? What's up? What's up? And then she shows me this flash of essentially, blood everywhere coming from certain locations, like wrists and stuff like that. And then she shows me the same color tile where she's at. And I go, did she pass in this bathroom? And she was like, yeah. I said, did she, you know, commit suicide? And she goes, yeah, she did. She goes, I'm sitting in the spot where I found her.

[Bonnie]

Wow.

[Amy Baleski]

And I go, oh, okay. And so her spirit is still in that area. And so she's trying to, like, come up to her wife and tell her how much she loves her and tell her how much she misses her. And she's trying to have this connection, and she's going through, and she's talking about their basset hound dog. Like, she's in that house with them. And I tell her all these things, and she's like, I see her all the time in here. I see her all the time. I'm like. Because they're. They're there. They're helping you until they move up. And so, yeah, that was very, very interesting.

[Bonnie]

How long does it take for somebody to be able to move up?

[Amy Baleski]

Okay, so time doesn't exist in the afterlife.

[Bonnie]

So it's just whenever.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. So who decides that they could move up Yourself.

[Bonnie]

Wow.

[Amy Baleski]

Yourself.

[Bonnie]

So it's like she has to let go.

[Amy Baleski]

She has to watch.

[Bonnie]

Done.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. You have to find your light. You have.

[Bonnie]

God, we got to work through trauma in this life and in the next.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, yeah, I mean, but if you.

[Bonnie]

If you kind of shit is that.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, I know, I know, but it's like if you, if you don't. And that's, that's the whole thing. We're here, we're learning, we're understanding, you know, what is love, you know, and all that stuff. And so if you kind of like flake out on it, you know, you're still gonna have to go learn.

[Bonnie]

Got a second chance. Yeah. So start doing the work now. Shadow work now?

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, absolutely. All the shadow work now. The whole thing is going to get a little creepy. Okay? So I'm sorry. And for people that have had this happen to them, I have been a person that has. Has been sexually assaulted. So I understand this. And so this is all about sexual assault. So trigger warning, okay? So I had. I will forever remember this. It was November 7th. It was my birthday two years ago. Me and my husband traveled over to Natchez, Mississippi, and I had to have sessions that day. Okay. And so I'm in this old. I love old creepy homes. And so I go and I. I rented an old creepy home. And I'm in there and I'm having sessions. And I'm having sessions with this one woman. And she wanted to channel two people. And I think the gentleman's name was like Geraldo or something like that. Just. It was a G name. I can't remember. It was. It was something Italian. And so I go through and I begin channeling him. And whenever I start channeling, I always feel around in the area that we're at right now. And then I go up. I couldn't feel anything. I didn't feel him. And I was like, weird. And then all of a sudden, I smelled booze. And I was like, okay, that's a little bit lower. And then I start hearing, like, that's what it sounds like in my head. And I'm like, there's a guy here, he's kind of like laughing. I said, he may be an alcoholic. She goes, he was. And then all I hear is heavy. Like if somebody has black dress shoes on with really heavy heels, men dress shoes. Like walking on a wood floor. Click, click, click. And I get a vision of this guy and he has this black slick back hair and he has this white button up T shirt, not button up shirt that he has, like undone. You can see the sweat on him. And he has these black long trousers. But he makes my vision go to, like, his creepy crotch area. And so he's walking around. I mean, so get this. But everything is like black around him. So it's like if there'd be a spotlight on him. And then he shows me this image of him really quickly putting his hand, like, over a girl, a little girl with her about right here. And he was like. And the liked it, and she still does. And I look, and you could feel that this little girl was my client.

[Bonnie]

Oh, my God.

[Amy Baleski]

How do you say that? So I looked at her, I go, I think your dad is in. I said, this is your dad, right? She goes, yeah. I said, I think your dad is in a really bad spot. She goes, he should be. I said, I have a question for you. I said, did he, like, sexually assault you? She goes, yeah, until I was 18.

[Bonnie]

Oh, my God.

[Amy Baleski]

Every day, me and my sister. Until I was 18. And I said, and he smoked cigarettes. She goes, yeah, he smoke and drink all the time. And he goes, yeah. And I never got caught for it. And he starts laughing, like, ha, ha, ha. Right? And so I asked her, I said, why does he keep laughing about not getting caught for it? She goes, me and My sister, about 10 years ago, we got together. We got enough proof. We were. I think they were like, 22 or 23, and we got him in jail. And she goes, the day before he was sentenced, he hung himself.

[Bonnie]

Oh, my gosh.

[Amy Baleski]

He never got caught.

[Bonnie]

And he's distilled to.

[Amy Baleski]

And he's in there. So he's this narcissistic ass hat that he didn't want anything to do with me at all. But he's in that lower state.

[Bonnie]

And so. So spirits can choose to just be.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

In hell if they wanted.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Yeah. Well, because he likes that. He likes the drinking, he likes the smoking, he likes the dominance. He likes that, you know, sexual.

[Bonnie]

But you would think that he would.

[Amy Baleski]

Pay type of thing.

[Bonnie]

Afterlife.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, he is paying for it when he's gonna pay for it for forever there. Yeah. Right. And then at some point, he will choose to move up.

[Bonnie]

I feel like people like that shouldn't get a chance to choose to move up.

[Amy Baleski]

I agree with you on that. But that's also where we. Where we have to forgive. Right? At the same time. I know, I know. That's where we have to forgive, but it's. It's a. It's an interesting journey. And heaven is very light. We know about that with Nan.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

And it's very light. Yeah, yeah.

[Bonnie]

She loves Jay.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes. Light and airy and fun and. And so many people go, oh, my loved one is in heaven. Or they. You know, they passed of cancer, or they had a really good life and they died. Why can't I feel them? Well, because we're here in this middle area, and we're not usually making our way up to here to heaven. Right. That's why we only get little glimpses of them every so often or like something nice, like a butterfly or like a really good song, because that's heavenly.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Right. Because we're down here doing our work right now.

[Bonnie]

So before we go, I wanted to ask you anything, if, you know, I'm going through this situation with my dad.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Is there any way you can tap into that and kind of just read his energy right now or anything like that?

[Amy Baleski]

A couple of times.

[Bonnie]

Can you do that with the living, too?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. You can? Yeah. You can feel. What? You want to know? Know?

[Bonnie]

Yeah, I just want to know, like, what. What do we think is, you know, I don't want to say end result, but, you know, he seems to think he can fight this, and I'm just. I've already. I. When I first saw him, I gave him a couple of weeks.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

But since my dad has seen me.

[Amy Baleski]

When is he going on dialysis? He.

[Bonnie]

Well, he has cancer.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

So they. He's refusing to do chemo.

[Amy Baleski]

Ah.

[Bonnie]

So he wants to do all natural. So he wants to. To do, like, immunotherapy and stuff like that. Which. I'm flying him to Nashville to start doing all of those alternative treatments.

[Amy Baleski]

Good.

[Bonnie]

He just went into the hospital last night with a blood clot and pneumonia.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

So we're hoping that works out. But, you know, I. I touched my dad last night. And I told them this earlier, that I felt his skin. And, like, have you ever felt a dead person's skin?

[Amy Baleski]

I felt my dad's. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

And that's exactly how it feels. And I just. I touched his leg. Legs. And he's so tiny. And I know, like, he used to be just this big.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

Strong man.

[Amy Baleski]

I know how you feel.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, I know. I just kind of want to tap into it and just see if, like, I don't know what I'm looking for. Maybe.

[Amy Baleski]

Let. Let me tell you, I have sat around actually last night and this morning, and I've thought and I felt. And all they showed me for a little bit was weird. It was, like, real. But see, I don't. He's not retaining fluid in his legs, though, right now. Right.

[Bonnie]

That's amazing that you said that.

[Amy Baleski]

Is that a thing?

[Bonnie]

He was ha. His ankles were so swollen. I actually have a picture of his ankles in my phone. They were so swollen. And they took him off this medicine and the swelling's going down.

[Amy Baleski]

Good.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, good.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. They were showing, like this morning, and last night I was sitting there, it was like if you had the. Like a. Almost like a club foot type of thing.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, that's exactly what it was.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. With that. And that's why I was like, when is he going on dialysis? Because I know that goes along with kidneys and stuff like that doesn't feel like a positive thing. Right.

[Bonnie]

Let's just say that, too.

[Amy Baleski]

Let's just say that. And, you know, because you're connected to your dad. But I also, there's sometimes when spirits, they don't want to say three weeks.

[Bonnie]

Right.

[Amy Baleski]

Right. They don't want to say four weeks because that means we'll lose hope and we'll start living in the negative. But for me, as I'm going into this, I mean, there's an ending coming up pretty quick. And when. I mean quick, I mean, it's like, I would even say nine months, but we'll see, you know, we'll see. Or it's going to be just this really big battle because it feels like this. It feels like this lull. Yeah, right. Like that.

[Bonnie]

Yeah. He's like, decided that he wants to fight now. I'm like, he could have told me this a year ago.

[Amy Baleski]

I know. And I want him to fight. And when he does now remember, too, everything. Everything can be different. It can change. It depends on what path we want. Right. And then we can kind of like bring stuff into alignment.

[Bonnie]

That's kind of where I'm at. I'm like, you know what?

[Amy Baleski]

I'm.

[Bonnie]

I. I'll be sad about it whenever it happens, but right now, even if it's to the point of delusion, I'm just gonna let him do whatever he needs to do and what I can do to just try to make him better.

[Amy Baleski]

Well, and that's. And that's what you do. And there. There also needs to be a point where you need to really think about, like, the comfort of also end of life care. Right. Like getting into that. Because I also find so many people, including my dad, that even when, like, there is not a chance in hell. Right. He still wanted to fight. And yes, that's good. That's good, that's good. But there was no comfort in it. There was no. It was always still. No, it was always still in this fear base. You know, if I want to live.

[Bonnie]

I want to live, I want to live.

[Amy Baleski]

And so essentially he ended up going out with that and that I want to live. And I don't know. The more I see it and I look at and experience it with spirits in my own family, I don't know. There's at some point where I would just say, you know, I just want to lay down and watch TV for, you know, like, two weeks and not really give a. At the same time, but it just doesn't. Hold on. I'm feeling. Go spend Christmas with him.

[Bonnie]

He's going to. He's going to be with me in Nashville, so.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, for sure. Spend Christmas with him. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Good. Well, at least we'll make it to Christmas.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. It doesn't. They just showed me a stocking, so that's why I'm thinking Christmas will be.

[Bonnie]

I literally lost my mom last year, and so I'm like, can we just get past my mom's death date?

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

So when you saying Christmas, I'm like, okay, cool. I can do that.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

Like, I keep having this fear that he's gonna die in November, too, and I'm gonna lose both my parents in November.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

For some reason. And it's so crazy because I told my husband all year last year, and today or this year, I was like, I'm gonna lose my dad. Yeah. I was. Something's gonna happen to my dad. Like, I feel like this is. He's gonna die next year, and then this year, I mean, I have text messages where I'm like, I'm. I'm worried because I just feel like my dad's gonna die.

[Amy Baleski]

Do you know why you're doing that? Because you're mourning that person who you will become when you lose your father. You. We. All of these things, everything is happening now. We're just pulling that frame into focus. And so you know that that frame is going to happen, and you're feeling it because you're more sensitive to it, and so you're mourning, getting to that frame.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, that's it. We had a rocky relationship, but he's still my pops, you know?

[Amy Baleski]

But who cares? Let it go.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, I have. As soon as I found out he was sick, I flew right to him.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. And that's what you need to do. And so many people don't get that chance. So many people don't do it. Or they go, oh, my God, I'm just so pissed at him. I hope he comes back and tells me he's sorry before he's dead. Shut up about that.

[Bonnie]

Yeah.

[Amy Baleski]

Stop it.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, go and see your parents, dude. Especially if it's that end of life.

[Amy Baleski]

Yes, exactly. Amy.

[Bonnie]

I'M so happy you came.

[Amy Baleski]

I love you. I'm happy.

[Bonnie]

Me, too.

[Amy Baleski]

Thank you for having me.

[Bonnie]

Dude, I want you to come back more. Maybe, like, next you come back, we can channel. Yeah, we'll channel. We'll do readings, stuff like that. I really just wanted people to get to know your story. Story.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Well, thank you. Yeah, it's. It's crazy. There's so much more. Like, there's. So that's why I'm writing a book? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a whole thing. And, like, talk about spirits, talk about spookies, talk about. I mean, dog spirits. I mean, you name it. Channel, feel. And then we could even. I could teach you how to meditate and zone out. How do you want to feel your aura?

[Bonnie]

Yeah, I would love to.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay, real quick. Okay, you ready? Okay. Okay. Everybody can probably do this if you want to.

[Bonnie]

All right, let's all do it. Everybody do it. Mimi, you're doing it, too.

[Amy Baleski]

All right, here we go. Come on. All right, so this is what I want you to do. So I want you to get your hands, and I want you to kind of just like, put them in front of you, all right? And I want you to put them about half an inch apart.

[Bonnie]

I'm not good with inches unless it's a penis in front of me.

[Amy Baleski]

That's about six and a half, you know, so. No. So put them about a half an inch apart from one another. Okay. And then what I want y' all to do is I want you to focus. What do I mean? Put your attention and focus it in between those fingers. Okay, so focus your attention in between your hands and your fingers. And then move your eyes from the fingertips down to the base of your palm. Slowly. And focus it all there. Just keep doing it back and forth. Bring all of your attention there. This is where being in the present right in that moment is key. All right? Now what I want you to do after we're doing that, there's a lot of stuff going on in the background. But what I want you to do.

[Bonnie]

Three, six Mafia.

[Amy Baleski]

Right now? Yeah. This is it, right? Yeah. It's usually better when I'm used to working in silence. But what I want you to do is I want you to take your hands and I want you to slowly push them forward, like in on one another, without touching them. Get as close as you can and then pull it back.

[Bonnie]

Oh, you can kind of see colors.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, you can kind of see colors. You can see that. Also, I want you to kind of bring it in and out almost like, bounce it a little bit, and you can feel the warmth. The warmth. And almost something like a magnet. Like the. You know, like when you're putting two magnets that don't like each other. Yep. So. And you can make that. If you focus on it. It almost feels like a moist sponge. Ooh, I hate that word.

[Bonnie]

We love moist.

[Amy Baleski]

Right? And moist. And so that is your energetic field. I love it.

[Bonnie]

It's pretty strong.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. That's your aura. And you can get it to about two and a half, three inches. You know, it's not that big, but. But that is all around you. And so when you go up and give somebody a hug and you say, oh, my God, I can feel your energy. You can.

[Bonnie]

So I hate hugging people.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, absolutely. Yes. Oh. And then literally. I know. And truly the last.

[Bonnie]

I mean, people I like, you know, people I don't.

[Amy Baleski]

Everybody.

[Bonnie]

Right. Like, I love to hug people.

[Amy Baleski]

I know. Are you being Howie Mandela?

[Bonnie]

Literally.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay, I'm on my way. I mean, I love how you Mandel.

[Bonnie]

I'm on my way.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay.

[Bonnie]

I would love the up all the time if I could. Literally. I talk about my OCD online.

[Amy Baleski]

I know, I know, I know. I've heard it before. I like it. No, no, this is the other thing. I want you to think of this real quick. Okay? So remember, everything is energy, right? Everything is frequency. I want you to think about everything in this space, including your body. Right? So what is your body? It is. You take it down to a cellular level, and all it is is protons, neutrons, electrons, and quibs. Right? Which is light, which is energy, which is bouncing around. And then when you get into this space, you have all these other radio waves, Right? You are a wave everything.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, no, that's why I. I always go to my bus, because this is so much energy all the time. So I always have to go there and kind of, like, decompress and shake it off a little bit.

[Amy Baleski]

That's exactly what it is. So there you go. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Well, Amy, tell everybody where they find you, too. Shout out all your socials, your only fans if you.

[Amy Baleski]

I. Well, I wanted to. You know, they tried to get me on only fans a lot, and my husband would not let me be on only fans.

[Bonnie]

Listen, you guys needed to get on there.

[Amy Baleski]

I know.

[Bonnie]

Slap some skins.

[Amy Baleski]

Spirit. Exactly. Spirits and sexies. But no, no, Only fans yet. But no, it is. It's Tik Tok and it's double Esy. T H E B A L E. Bailey.

[Bonnie]

Sky.

[Amy Baleski]

No, Bailey.

[Bonnie]

Longest time. I thought it was Bailey.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, you're okay. No, Nobody thinks it's a Russian Jew name. And so the Baleski. I'll tell you why it's that. And then on everything else, it's the Baleski. You can even Google me. I am the only Baleski in the United States. B, A, L, E, S, K, Y. And then my website is the Baleski Experience, and you can watch a lot of my sessions. I am now the most reviewed and highest rated medium in the United States.

[Bonnie]

Let's go, baby.

[Amy Baleski]

Which is kind of cool.

[Bonnie]

So proud of you.

[Amy Baleski]

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[Bonnie]

Just took your life and just.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Did the damn thing.

[Amy Baleski]

Absolutely. Oh, and the last thing. So why is my name the Baleski? So my dad had seven daughters. I was the youngest one, and he never had a boy. And so the Bileski name died whenever. Obviously, he died. Right. And they came over from Russia. They were slaughtered during World War II because they were Jewish, you know, and stuff like that. And they fought and they built up their life here. They became. For traders. I became very, you know, very wealthy after doing that. And then dad was in the Air Force. And so whenever he passed away, I said, you know what? I want to make the name live on. And so I trademarked it. Even the United States.

[Bonnie]

I love that. So it does live on.

[Amy Baleski]

It does live on.

[Bonnie]

He's proud of you.

[Amy Baleski]

He is.

[Bonnie]

Does your dad visit you?

[Amy Baleski]

Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. More than often, he visits him.

[Bonnie]

Really?

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. It's a whole thing. So tell him. Tell her. Are you in tune? Oh, come on. Oh, come on. Come on.

[Bonnie]

He's like, this is your thing, honey.

[Amy Baleski]

I don't go and fling it out there.

[Bonnie]

I'm just present in my own immediate.

[Amy Baleski]

There's enough. There's enough going on in our house with just her.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, I could imagine.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. No, we.

[Bonnie]

He feels like, give me a break. In my life and who's in the.

[Amy Baleski]

Room and with her, the stories that she brings into it. Yeah. But. But other than that, I don't reach out looking for any extra because I.

[Bonnie]

Got enough going on.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. He essentially is my person. I know. Thank you. He's. He's essentially the person that makes me not feel crazy, because I'll go up to him and I'll. I'll get these things, and I go, babe, watch what happens. This just happened today. Watch. I'm gonna have this later on.

[Bonnie]

Right?

[Amy Baleski]

And he goes, okay. And then it does. And so I can go back and go, oh, my God, you did say that. Right? Like, he's he's that person for me.

[Bonnie]

I love that. You guys are cute.

[Amy Baleski]

Cute too. Thank you. I like him.

[Bonnie]

We need more content with him.

[Amy Baleski]

I know. I know. I want to. He won't come in.

[Bonnie]

Do it. You're hilarious.

[Amy Baleski]

He is. I know. I know. They. He. He shows up ever so often.

[Bonnie]

He shows up when it counts.

[Amy Baleski]

Exactly.

[Bonnie]

I love it.

[Amy Baleski]

Yay.

[Bonnie]

Thank you.

[Amy Baleski]

I love you.

[Bonnie]

Thank you so much. I love you. And you gotta promise me to come back next year.

[Amy Baleski]

I will.

[Bonnie]

We'll just make you our resident.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah, we'll do it. We'll do it. We'll feel around. We'll do it for everybody. Do you have anybody like that lost? Okay. Only reason I'm saying this, like, Greg.

[Bonnie]

Greg. Like, around me Greg?

[Amy Baleski]

No, just somebody. I don't know. It was weird.

[Bonnie]

Is there a Greg in the room? No.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay. The only reason I said that is because there was a name of Greg that popped up in my spirit box. And then over here, I drove by a building that said Greg on it, and then I saw a street that said Greg. Yeah. And there's another thing. So there's something to do with Greg.

[Bonnie]

Greg. I got fucking goosebumps talking about it.

[Amy Baleski]

When we were getting ready right now.

[Bonnie]

Greg. Hello, Greg.

[Amy Baleski]

Shut up, shut up, shut up. Hello, Greg. Good.

[Bonnie]

Dude. I got goosebumps.

[Amy Baleski]

Oh.

[Bonnie]

That's why I was feeling Greg is the one that. The brother.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Oh.

[Bonnie]

Oh, my God.

[Amy Baleski]

That's what I was feeling. Oh, I love it. Oh, I was gonna tell you. A man was around here earlier and I was like, she's gonna be think I'm weird. I don't know if she knows what I do yet.

[Bonnie]

That's so amazing. Does he want to talk to her?

[Amy Baleski]

He just showed up to say hi. Oh, my God. Oh, there's so much stuff going on in the background. Hang on. Give me a second. So, yeah, I saw that name over and over and over again. Came in on my spirit box, and then I saw it three times on the way here and I was like, there's a Greg with me.

[Bonnie]

Like, who is amazing. At least it was my mom. My mom wanted me to take her on tour with us. Last time she came through.

[Amy Baleski]

Through.

[Bonnie]

Yes.

[Amy Baleski]

But do you see? See, I just showed you how it works, the connections. And it's. It's logical. It's logical.

[Bonnie]

Literally, we were just talking about that.

[Amy Baleski]

On the bus and you were talking about it. I'm coming to see you. You're connected to me. I'm the. The point of least resistance because I do this and he's coming over to say hi to you and who knows that you were gonna be my person here. Right? And hold on, Greg. Okay, Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I don't have my notepad on me. That's kind of like my.

[Bonnie]

You're how you draw.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. Hold on. Seeing that being loud, normally I have my noise canceling headphones in.

[Bonnie]

Hey, you're good. It's three six mafia too. So it's like a seance right now.

[Amy Baleski]

I mean, it's the perfect place for us to be then. Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Literally.

[Amy Baleski]

Hold on. Yeah. What? Oh, there we go. Essentially, it's just like how. How proud he is to, like, be your uncle. Proud he is to do that. Like, proud of what you're doing. I think he's gonna accompany you on, like, your trips and stuff that are, like, coming up too, so that's okay. What? I don't think he's as big of a cat person as your dad, though, right? Yeah. Huh? Yeah. He goes like this. I said. So I said, she told me a story about the dad and like, the cats said, do you have that soft heart, too? He's like, no, not nearly as much. I was like, oh, okay, cool. See, all that happens in like a half of a second. And What? Hold on, hold on. Why am I closing my ears? Because I'm trying to think. Hold on. Interesting. Why is Christmas coming up so much odd? I guess because it's coming up. I need you to go back and, like, be with them. Like, are you gonna. Can you do that? Yeah. What's up with that? Yeah, for like, Christmas this year. I know it's hard or something, but, like, it needs to happen. You're the freaking kidney one. That's you. Ding dong.

[Bonnie]

Yeah, the dialysis that you picked up on you. Oh, that's crazy.

[Amy Baleski]

Okay. I need you to go and be with him. And he's talking about being there because he wants to be by his side and make sure that. That he's okay. I don't. I mean, what?

[Bonnie]

Sweet gray.

[Amy Baleski]

I know when. I mean, but they don't have, like, a person for the thing yet. Like, they haven't heard any word for the list of the kidney thing yet. Okay. Sometimes they go, oh, my God, we haven't. It's going to be six months, though. Or like, you know, that they're talking about. It's weird. It may come into play, but, like, the risk of infection is like, that supersedes, like, everything. He's gonna be there for him. I. I asked him. I said, he's gonna cross over as, like, something like that. And he essentially told me, like, shut the up. So obviously we don't want to go. I mean, I don't. We don't want to go there yet, but. Yeah, just tell your dad. He's around him. Got it. It's a big thing. Yeah. Okay. There you go. Yep. Mini reading randomly. Yeah. Greg.

[Bonnie]

We love Greg.

[Amy Baleski]

Isn't that random? That's wild, y' all. I love. Really cool.

[Bonnie]

We love that.

[Amy Baleski]

I love spirits. They're so fun. And, like, today.

[Bonnie]

No, you're fine. Listen, my dad. My dad's got two feet. I don't even know how he's still here. Two feet in the grave. I don't know how he's still here exactly.

[Amy Baleski]

Mine's already dead. They're just going to party together, and when we all hang out, they're going to be having a party, literally.

[Bonnie]

Cheers to all our dads.

[Amy Baleski]

Cheers to dads. Wait, can I tell you one more thing? So whenever you go and you cross over, like, I'm not saying it's happening. I can't say it's happening, but what ends up happening is remember that when you're born, you come into this body and you have all these family coming around you to, like, help you as a baby come in. Like, remember, you're this large soul in this tiny little, you know, nugget of meat, Right? So you're not actually a baby or this expansive, universal thing. But anyways, whenever you go and you cross over, you have these spirits waiting for you to love you and take you home as well. So you're never alone on either side.

[Bonnie]

That's very heartwarming.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah. You labor in and you labor out. And each side is met with love. There you go.

[Bonnie]

We love that. And on that note.

[Amy Baleski]

Yeah.

[Bonnie]

Before she starts reading anymore.

[Amy Baleski]

I know, I know. No more Greg's.

[Bonnie]

We are out of here. I love you guys. Love you, Amy. Thank you so much.

[Amy Baleski]

And I love you, too.

[Bonnie]

Thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of Don Blonde. We will see you guys next week.

[Amy Baleski]

Bye. Are you feeling stuck in your career or lacking employment at the moment experiencing symptoms of job dissatisfaction?

[Bonnie]

You might be suffering from a common.

[Amy Baleski]

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[Bonnie]

Expert tips and insights. And don't forget to check out our.

[Amy Baleski]

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