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- [00:00]
A
Hello. Welcome. My God, I've missed you. It's been so long. I'm sorry about that. I hate saying this because everybody says it. It's kind of the hymn of capitalism. You can hear the words I'm about to say all over the Unabomber's manifesto. I've been busy and I wanted. I love these. This is my favorite part of the podcast at this point. I mean, I love chatting with people and stuff, but, boy, this is fun. Just doing solo episodes is so fun. Cathartic. We get to explore ideas together. We get to investigate the dark corners of reality and the bright corners of reality. And the truth of the matter is, we've got enough dark corner Investigators. Dci. I don't know if you remember that show. It was on, what, Quix Quirks or whatever. It's one of those weird new channels that just pop up on your TV before you get to Netflix. And Dark Corners Investigators are just about two extremely neurotic dudes who were obsessed with politics, and that's all. All they would do is just talk about politics on and on and on. They couldn't stop. It was really interesting. And then what was the last episode? I think their tongues turned to stone and fell out of their mouths and they bled out. It was really disturbing. Honestly, I wish I'd never seen that. But what about the Light Corners, friends? What about those corners? Have you ever thought to yourself that there might be something outside of everything? You know, it sounds so stupid, but it's an interesting thing to contemplate. You know, everything, you know, you don't know everything, but there's some certain amount of things, you know, they're inside of you. If you're a dude, no doubt you know how to make yourself calm. If you're. I don't know, if you're a construction worker, you know, whatever the fuck that is. I don't know any of that. If you're a biologist, you know how life flows through living creatures. You know about ATP? Is that what it's called? The energy that they. The way that we get energy to ourselves? If you're a veterinarian, you know how to. How to euthanize an animal. You don't want to, but you know what that's like. If you're a. Whatever you fucking are, there's all that stuff, you know, and then there's stuff you're interested in. Maybe you are a speedrunner in video games. You know how to get through Hollow Knight really fast. You know, honestly, I don't want to get Diverted from what I'm trying to say here, but. And I think I've bitched about this before, but my God, it's such a disappointing game. And I want a challenge when I play games. And I know it's an indie studio. I'm not trying to. The last thing an indie studio needs is some asshole talking shit about them. And the game wasn't that expensive, but I finished it in, what, 15 minutes. And it's just disappointing. I was disappointed, but that's not the point. The point is there's everything you know, and all that you know is a blindfold in the sense that you keep focusing on the stuff that you're interested in. We're kind of like, you know, the way truffle pigs sniff around for truffles out there in the forest. I don't know if you've ever seen that. It's beautiful. I love going out in the forest with my pigs. Fly out in a private plane, get those babies loaded up, get them on their napping beds, head to a truffle forest, generally Bavaria. Fly the plane in, have a nice spa day. My pigs, they get to go to the spa too. That's what it's like when you have so much money. And then I take my truffle pigs out there into the forest, and it's amazing to watch what they do. They just love sniffing around for truffles. And. And the squeal they make when they find a fresh truffle is the most beautiful sound I've ever heard outside of the laughter of my children. But a truffle pig, it just looks for truffles. That truffle pig could be running through the forest. There could be a crashed UAP right there. There could be a silver uap, a ticket, something that is figured out of bend time, space, and travel at unprecedented speeds that would smush a weak human body like a Vienna sausage under a high heel. It's my favorite genre of porn. Wouldn't even notice that uap, because it'd be sniffing around for them truffles. Now you gotta ask yourself, am I a truffle pig? I ask that every morning. I look in the mirror and I say, duncan, are you like, one of your truffle pigs? Are you wearing the blinders of everything? You know, walking right by UAPs? You might be. You might have one in your living room. You don't even see it because you're so fixated on this or that. Now, there's a story I really love. And apparently there was this academic person, professor he taught Buddhism and was very excited because this famous Zen Roshi was coming to his city and was actually going to have a meeting with him. And so he's really, really excited to talk to this Zen Roshi. And so he sits down for tea with this enlightened being and the professor is telling him what he teaches, talking to him about the forms of Buddhism. He's interested in mentioning the papers that he's written, just going on and on. And as he's talking to the Zen master, he doesn't notice that the Zen master has been pouring his tea for him. And he looks down and he realizes the Zen master is pouring the tea and not stopping and all the tea is flowing out of the cup all over the floor. And the Zen master smiles at the professor and says, if your cup isn't empty, it can't be filled again. You know, basically like it's a Zen way of saying, shut the fuck up, dude, you're just yapping about Zen. But the reality is our cups are being filled up with diarrhea that's coming into us from all of social media. Our attention spans are atrophied. Like a testosterone deprived old man who used to have a nice swinging hog. Beautiful hog that old man had. People loved it, everyone loved it when he came out on the deck of his ship. He was a fisherman and swung that hog around in the morning, that that's how he would wake up the crew smack it on the deck. Thap, Thap, Thap, Thap, Thap. And they'd all come out and some of them, if they woke up late, they'd be disappointed because they didn't get to catch a view of his beautiful, girthy, powerful fisherman hog. Now, of course I'm quoting Ernest Hemingway. That's not. That's Old Man Tog, one of my favorite books by Hemingway. But the point is, our attention spans, they've been destroyed, annihilated. They're just what used to be veiny, pulsing power that sprayed white hot life into the quivering loins of mermaids. What is it now? It's a shriveled up shrimp. Sad. It's like Planet of the Apes, statue of Liberty on the beach. That's the human attention span. They just did a study. It's really interesting. They found out that LLMs can actually get brain rot from being online too much. That large language models, the large language models fueling AI. Fueling AI generated content that so many people love. And I guess if there's any pleasure I take right now in the strange Mood of the Zeitgeist. It's that at least we all agree that there is nothing more awesome than AI generated videos, right, Josh?
- [09:30]
B
They're the best.
- [09:31]
A
They're the best. It's shocking because, you know, these days, like, you could post a picture of a butterfly. You could post a picture of a monarch butterfly, a hypnotic monarch butterfly, its wings flapping beautifully as you lay in your sleeping pod. And people would be like, what the fuck, man? What's wrong with you? Are you a fascist now? But if you post AI generated videos, 100% of the time, everyone is like, thank you. Thank you so much. This is beautiful. Thank you for doing this. Thanks for putting in the work. And it is work. I don't know if you can see it, but there's a callus on my prompting thumb. I've been doing a lot of. It's actually a prompting finger. I've been doing a lot of prompts, and it's calloused up my finger. And I'm willing to do it for you guys because, not to brag, but I now have access to Sora 2 the most. It's astonishing. And before I go further, I do want to address something, and I'm going to share with you some comments that I've been getting from the AI videos that I've been posting. They're great, but I do want to address one of them directly. Someone said, why are you posting these videos when you have seemingly don't like AI anymore? And the thing I know this is going to fuck with some of your minds. I'm sorry if it does. I'm sorry if you're driving and this makes you drive your car off the road. This happens sometimes. I get very sad postcards sometimes from grieving widows whose husbands were laughing so hard or weeping because they were so inspired that they just drive their car right into a semi truck or a school or a church or all. All of them because they were going so fast. So maybe pull over before I say this. Calm yourself down. I'm almost afraid to say this. This is one of those things where you say it and you're like, fuck, man. I don't know. This might get me deplatformed. People change some. I change my opinion sometimes. You're not going to say anything, judge. You're just not going to support me in this. You're just gonna be quiet.
- [12:32]
B
I mean, it's different. I mean, I've had the same opinion since I was 10 years old.
- [12:35]
A
But I know, okay, I do understand this. I know that the majority of people, when they decide on something, they stick with that permanently. I mean, this is. I know that it's non standard for me. I know that generally human beings. One thing that I know is a quality of humanity, is that humans don't really change. Once you decide something is this or that, you stick to it. This is why we wouldn't have science. If not for that, we wouldn't have all the great things. Because every great thing we have is a result of what people came up with thousands of years ago. And I know that people thousands of years ago figured out the right way to live, the difference between right and wrong. And they stuck with that, and their kids stuck with that. And most people never change. So. So there I said it. I'm gonna be honest with you. My opinions don't just change. Sometimes they change radically in like minutes. I will think, one, this is embarrassing. I almost feel like I'm naked right now. I will say one thing and I'll believe it. And then five minutes later, I'll think to myself, damn, you're so wrong about that. That's really wrong that you believe that. And then another five minutes, sometimes less, might pass. And I'll think, you know what, maybe I was right about that. And then sometimes I'll go back and forth like some kind of horrible pendulum between two polarities for weeks, back and forth, back and forth. And then at the end of those weeks, I will come to no conclusion. Nothing will result from my mentations. So I want to admit that, I want to confess that to you, that sometimes my opinions change radically, dramatically. And I know maybe you're listening and you're one of the very few people who's like, holy shit. I think I'm kind of like that too. You might be thinking to yourself, damn, why does it feel like there is a lot of pressure coming from people I'll never meet online to try to keep me in one position, one philosophical position. It feels so claustrophobic. It feels almost like I'm trying to be mind controlled or something. Now it could be, I mean, really, like if you wanted to like exert some kind of invisible power over massive amounts of people. There's a lot you have to do if you don't want to do like, overt tyranny. Overt tyranny. You can do it, but it's hard. Like, it doesn't last. Some people have pulled it off. Congratulations to Kim Jong Un. Not bad. It's a good run. It's a good run. He managed to do that for, like, I don't know how long, North Korea has been a dystopian fascist state, but I think long. Anybody know the answer to that? I don't know how long that is. But see, the problem with that is, like, inevitably, but just because. Just because it's so obvious, people wake up and then there's a fucking revolution. And you don't want that. If you want to evolve tyranny number one, you can't seem like a tyrant. Even better, you can't seem like a person. You want to seem like the zeitgeist. You want to seem like the majority. And so if you can convey that the majority thinks in an almost like, monolithic way to enough people, then the people who don't think that way will naturally start thinking that way. Because people are fundamentally insecure. Because being human is a fundamentally insecure situation. We want answers. That's just the basic reality of humanness. You want to know what's around the corner, man, you want the unboxing. We literally watch unboxing videos to relax. There's a whole YouTube channel called Unboxing Therapy or something. It's just people opening boxes with shit in them. We love it. We love to see what's in the box. We love to see the process of the box being opened up. We love it. It's hypnotic. We want to know. And the brutal reality of human existence itself is that you won't know. You can't know. And anything that you do know is only like an infinitesimally tiny percentage of what can be known. So you can know. So what do you do to fill in the unknown? Gape in your mind. That gape. You just try to get easy information. You put it in there like somebody shoving trash they found on the next to a dumpster into a wound in their arm. Just fill it up with shit. What happens if I shit in my wound? And then of course, it gets infected, it starts festering. But I guess you kind of have a sense that you filled up your hole. People like to fill up their holes. It's just a thing. I mean, this is why the butt plug industry is so. Is booming right now. And we'll get to my big announcement related to that. But what. And again, not trying to offend anyone here, but what happens if you don't fill up your hole? You ever thought about that, Josh?
- [19:07]
B
I've never had my hole unfilled.
- [19:10]
A
This is what I'm saying. And I went through that phase. Two years, every hole filled, you know, food and, you know, I would put food in all my holes. The edible butt plugs. I'm not going to get to it. I'm very excited to announce it. You can eat through your butt. We'll get to that. If you wanted to, like, hypnotize a whole population, the best way to do it is to make them think that you have something that's the perfect shape to fit their hole. That's the best way to do it. First thing, you recognize people like their holes filled. The next thing you do is trick them into thinking there's a certain shape, that once this fills your hole, you're going to be satisfied. Every commercial that you watch on TV is telling you that their product is the perfect shape for your hole. This sacred episode of the DTFH is brought to you by the saints of Squarespace. And I mean that. You know, it's. At some point, we will recognize that Squarespace was created by mystics who saved the world from eons of suffering. And I can say that. I could say that because I went through. Through the dark times before Squarespace. I went through the times where if you wanted to build a website, God help your soul, you would go to a bookstore. You would get a big, thick, shitty book on HTML. Whoever wrote that book, they didn't want you to build a website. They didn't care about you. They wanted to drive you crazy in the same way. Way the mad Arab, Abdul Azarad, who wrote the Necronomicon, did not give a shit whether or not you were capable of summoning Kandarian demons, but rather wanted to drive you to madness. HTML manuals are the new Necronomicon in Squarespace. Squarespace is the great white light shining into some befouled temple far in the depths of the earth, where robed figures dressed in crimson pray eldritch prayers to that thing, that thing which lived and will live again. They've healed the world, and they've done it because they love us. And they want you to have a beautiful website. And you could make that with Squarespace. They've got everything you need. You can use AI now. They have an incredible AI that will help you design the website. It's not just that. Everything. People take it for granted. It's kind of sad. People take it for granted that Squarespace will let you put your social media up, no problem. That's easy. You know what that would look like not that long ago, before Squarespace came to cleanse us of the horror of trying to code your own website? It would look like weeks. Weeks and Weeks and weeks of trying to figure that out. It won't let me. Weird error codes. Some kind of protection that you. The phone doesn't want people going to your website to get hacked. And by going to your website it recognizes that. It opens the phone to. To. To essentially an ocean of viruses. Vri, viruses, whatever. Oh, they could just do it in a second. With Squarespace, you guys will never understand how beautiful that is. You can easily set up payments to sell merch on your website, no problem. You can have paywalls if you want to have members only areas to show pictures of your beautiful, beautiful dainty feet. Yes, you can do that with Squarespace. I'm going to tear up. It's incredible. Squarespace is a spark flying off the future singularity. And that is going to be a beautiful singularity. If Squarespace is a fractalized Holon. This is not in the ad read. Look up what Holon means as above, so below doesn't matter. It's a beautiful way to extantiate your dreams into the digital realm. It's more than a website building service. It's more than a service that will help you send beautiful emails to your clients or friends or family. It's more than the ultimate tool to build something out there on the world wide web. It is the hope of humanity. Head to squarespace.com duncan for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use Offer Code Duncan to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Again, head to squarespace.comduncan for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use Offer code Duncan to save 10% off your first order of a website or a domain where there's anxiety regarding like is your family going to be okay? A car sized hole. A hole that can be filled with the iPhone. By the way, the new iPhone is great. This actually did help fill my hole. It's not just commercials, it's entire ideologies. People are. We're all filling up our holes with batshit crazy things. You aren't supposed to say, I don't know anymore. You can't say that. If somebody asks you like, what do you think about fill in the political topic? What's a political topic people are upset about Josh.
- [26:06]
B
Oh, the. What's it called? The restaurant that changed the Cracker Barrel.
- [26:12]
A
Cracker Barrel. You think that's political?
- [26:15]
B
Very political.
- [26:16]
A
Why?
- [26:17]
B
Because they. They made it political.
- [26:19]
A
How is it political?
- [26:20]
B
Because it became more racist when they changed the way they had their.
- [26:25]
A
And you pull up the old Cracker Barrel Logo? Yeah, because I keep hearing about this shit. I don't really understand it.
- [26:37]
B
Okay, so that's the new logo, and that's the old logo.
- [26:42]
A
Yeah, but you know who the fucking guy next to the barrel is, right? You posed for that, right?
- [26:47]
B
I assume one of the founders of America.
- [26:49]
A
Pull up a picture of Ed Gein. It was Ed Gein. Like, that's from the movie there. Pull up the black and white.
- [26:58]
B
This guy.
- [26:59]
A
Yeah, that's why they took it off. Ed Gein, the famous murderer who so many horror movies are based on. There's a really fucked up show on Netflix about him. You know, he, like, skinned his mother, danced around in her flesh. Well, Ed Gein was friends with the dude who did that Cracker Barrel drawing. He didn't know Ed Gein what was in the fucking barrel, but he went to Ed Gein's house, and in that fucking barrel there was, like, mummified vaginas. That's why they changed it. It's not political at all.
- [27:33]
B
Oh, shit. Didn't know that.
- [27:34]
A
You didn't know that?
- [27:35]
B
No.
- [27:36]
A
Yeah, like, that barrel, because the guy who drew it said that, like, he smelled something weird coming from the barrel, and he asked Ed, like, can I open the barrel? That's when Ed put his arm up over it, and that's when he was like, oh, shit, that's a perfect pose.
- [27:52]
B
Oh, they switched it back. Apparently. So August 21, and then August 27, they switched it back.
- [27:58]
A
Listen, I don't think that we should just. Cause you drew at Gein if it's a great picture that, you know, I think if anything, there's some redemption for all the people whose vaginas were in that barrel, that. That they got to be in a really cool picture, you know? Now to get to the point, the. Probably you can be many things at once. This is another controversial thing to say. So, you know, you can. Like, for example, you can simultaneously think, yeah, probably countries need borders, and also simultaneously think, maybe we shouldn't have borders. You can do both of those at the same time. It sounds nuts, but you can. You get to do that. That's what's so fun about being human. Don't let anyone trick you into thinking you have to have some specific, stable point of view. This, you know, the fucking hooks they put in the marionettes, that's your hooks that they fucking march you around. You could do both. It's really scary because, like, I. You don't want to be. Nobody wants to be a bad person, but you can't. You are Part of you sucks, part of you is wonderful. And those things can co. They exist together. They don't have to be at war with each other. And God help you if you're suppressing one. That's where you go. To cuckoo land. So you can be a lot of things at once. And I've. You know what? I've always just. What I love about art is that I don't think there's rules. It's lawless, it's anarchic. It has no rules. It's outside of time, space. And by that, what I mean is like, forget the fucking thing you made. I'm talking about the experience of making things. For those of you who like to create stuff, forget the fucking thing you drew. I'm happy you did. I love drawing. Most of what I draw sucks, but that's a secondary thing compared to the experience of making things. And there's nothing I know of in the world quite as psychedelic as that. Where do you go? You're not even there. We were supposed to start this an hour ago, but, you know, I was late because I was finishing up one of my oil paintings for the Louvre. It's gonna go in the place where they stole those gems. Isn't that cool? Got the call yesterday, man.
- [31:00]
B
They really need art after all the stealing and stuff.
- [31:03]
A
Well, I mean, it's not like they're desperate for art.
- [31:05]
B
No, no, that's not what I meant.
- [31:06]
A
It sounds like what you meant.
- [31:07]
B
That's not what I meant at all.
- [31:08]
A
You act like they went through a list of people, like a thousands of people, and landed on me.
- [31:13]
B
I believe you were in the top of that list.
- [31:15]
A
It wasn't a list.
- [31:16]
B
Oh, it was just you.
- [31:18]
A
Yeah, they call. It's these. You know what, man? Just so you know, like, I went to a pickup artist seminar in Phoenix and so I know what you're doing. You're negging.
- [31:31]
B
That's how I fill my hole.
- [31:34]
A
Fair enough. Fair enough. But friends, the. The moment in your life that you let some charismatic negative nancy get in your fucking head and control you by making you self censor or making you not use whatever fucking tools you want to make to make the stuff you make, that's the moment you become a puppet. And, you know, I'm gonna send you some clips. Have you seen these clips that came out with Jim Henson?
- [32:23]
B
No.
- [32:25]
A
Hold on a second. I'm gonna send this to you right now, okay? Dude, this is so creepy. So I. I've always been a big fan of Jim Henson. Do you like Jim Henson? You like the Muppets?
- [32:35]
B
Yeah, I love the Muppets.
- [32:37]
A
Who's your favorite Muppet?
- [32:39]
B
I was more of the. What's the. Fraggle Rock? I was more of a Fraggle Rock.
- [32:44]
A
Fraggle Rock wanted to live in Fraggle Rock. That was one of my go tos when I was a kid. Yeah, but dude, wait till you see this shit. I'll just play. Look, I'll just play it. It's just an interview with Jim Henson. I'll just play it so you can hear the audio. Is this coming through? Yeah. It's one of those moments you never forget. Your hand slides into a sock. Your sock is suddenly puppet flesh. Your hand is a spine. You are like God, fully in control. Did you hear that? Isn't that fucking creepy? Your hand is a spine. Puppet flesh. But it gets weirder. Listen to this. I want the neural implant so bad. It's crazy. It's limiting me. Well, I want to be able to instantaneously manifest. What the fuck? So now it's just going to freeze up on me. Oh, my computer's running out of juice. You got a charger, Josh?
- [33:42]
B
Yeah.
- [33:44]
A
Look, I'm going to play the hints and clips. This whole thing is just leading up to. I think this might be one of the greatest moments of my life, what I'm about to show you guys. Um, hang on a second. There we go. God, it's so creepy. Computers and they start running out of power. It's just like when people die. It's the same thing. You know what I mean? When you start dying, you glitch out. You fucking stutter, you. Hold on. That's just not gonna work.
- [34:20]
B
That's why I like to stare at my computer when it does that. And I hold the charger up like I hold your life in my hand and then I plug it in.
- [34:27]
A
God damn, dude. That's cool. Power over the machine.
- [34:32]
B
Yeah, exactly. They need to know.
- [34:33]
A
They do. You know, we'll get into that. That's probably another episode. Like ways that you can be passive aggressive towards your technology. And there you. If you're not doing that, you should start. It's dangerous because it starts getting an attitude and starts fucking up a lot. But hold on one second. So one second. You guys, I'm so sorry. This is the worst part of doing this shit is like you have to do these annoying pauses. It makes you seem unprofessional. You know, professional podcasters don't do this fucking shit.
- [35:10]
B
Yeah, they usually have producers that can do it really quick.
- [35:12]
A
Nick Fuente. No, but you can't read my mind.
- [35:16]
B
But I'm supposed to.
- [35:17]
A
How?
- [35:17]
B
Just like a marriage, you're too hard.
- [35:21]
A
Well, just like a marriage, you're setting expectations for yourself that are. You can't do that. It's one of those moments you never forget. Your hand slides into a sock. Damn it. Are you playing that? You are. Okay, hold on. All right, so I'm pulling it up right now. So, guys, I've had a few things happen to me in my Time of Podcasting. It's the name of my book, My Time of Podcasting. But everyone who's listened to this podcast for any amount of time knows that my favorite country singer is Hash Calloway. My dad loves Hash Calloway. And so when. So I get a phone call. It's my rep at Palantir, and I guess Hash Calloway works with Palantir. And they told me that Hash Calloway loves my podcast and he loves what I've been saying about blowing up the pyramids. And that he recorded an entire song and shot a fucking music video. Shit. For me. Palantir helped produce it. Thank you, guys. Love you guys. And now I'm just gonna show it to you. Can you just show that video?
- [36:47]
B
Yes.
- [36:49]
A
I'm gonna cry. Don't take my camera off. Gotcha.
- [36:54]
C
One night, I was driving upon a southern highway looking at the kudzu eating up the trees. And as the all of a sudden, I saw a silver spaceship. It transmitted information and said this to me. It said, the kudzu may be pretty, but it destroys the forest by blocking all the sunlight that the trees need to survive. Now, the pyramids aren't kudzu, but they freaking might as well be, because they absorb the sacred energy that keeps our dreams. Al. If you see a wasp nest burning, if you have a Bible learning, if you drop brown in the bowl, you gotta flush that pup. And when you're on a planet with pyramids upon it, the best thing that you can do is blow the damn things up. The spaceship had told me that if we work together, I could get more subscribers than that madman missed. And the money I would make would be more than enough to destroy the pyramids. At the very least, if you see a wasp nest, burn it. If you have a Bible, learn it. And if you drop brown in the bowl, you gotta flush that book. And when you're on a planet with pyramids upon it, the best thing that you can do is blow. Blow the damn things up. I woke up greased and naked in the back of My pickup, Sacred geometry shaved into my pubic mound. And now I'm on a mission to destroy the pyramids. I hope that you will join me. We gotta start right now. If you see a wasp nest, burn it if you have a Bible, learn it and if you drop brown in the bowl you gotta flush that pup and when you're on a planet with pyramids upon it the best thing that you can do is blow the damn things up if you see a wasp nest, burn it if you have a Bible, learn it and if you drop brown in the bowl you gotta flush that puff and when you're on a planet with pyramids upon it Best thing that you can do is blow the damn things up.
- [39:53]
A
Wow. Wow. I mean, thank. I just want to say thank. First of all, thank you, Palantir, for funding that video. And obviously, Mr. Calloway, anytime you want to come on this show, you are welcome. I love your work and I have never felt more honored in my entire life. Thank you. For those of you who aren't familiar with Operation Beast Blast, I just want to go over it very quickly and I hope that you again will pull your car over if you started driving again. Not because this is going to be the kind of thing that would cause you to swerve off the road, but because I want you to listen because it's important. And, you know, these days I do feel like people are afraid to speak up. And if we don't speak up, it doesn't matter if we've got a Kim Jong Un throwing us into labor camps because we say something. You don't need that. If we don't speak up because we're afraid, we're afraid we'll lose our jobs. We're afraid we'll be deplatformed. We're afraid of what? A few negative comments? Then you might as well tie a stone to your balls and throw yourself into quicksand. Because the only way that you can truly honor the ancestors is by being yourself. You can't conform. You can't become some kind of whatever the fuck your dumbest, coolest friend wants you to be. That's not. That's not why your grand. Your grandfather did not mount your grandmother. Your grandfather did not push your grandmother's skirt up and pull her underwear down and lap upon her quivering bush, moistening it, getting it ready. Your grandfather did not thrust his love inside of her like a missile piercing through the atmosphere, fiery hot, exploding into space, so that you could live a timid, scared life. Don't do that. Honor Your grandparents, lovemaking. You must. That's all you have. And so I want you to join me. The Operation Beast Blast, I'm excited to say, is gaining momentum. I want to thank those of you on Team 19. The work that you've been doing out there in Portland is spectacular. I love the zines, I love the posters. And there's no reason you can't form your own Peace Blast team. Call it whatever you want. Join up with some of your friends here online and you can begin again. Hopefully you've pulled over at this point. If not, I guess, take notes while you drive. Operation Beast Blast is a global movement. What we're trying to do is raise enough funds to blow up the pyramids. The pyramids, as most of you know, or anyone knows, are essentially like magnets for positive energy. The ancient Egyptians understood that they could harvest positive energy. And then there was a switch or a button or something in there. I don't know. It's gone now. It was stolen because it was made of gold. But you press the button and it releases the positive energy out into the world, making you happier. That's why everyone, when you see hieroglyphics, they're always smiling because they just pressed the button and that energy went out. Button was stolen. So that for thousands of years, the pyramids have only been absorbing the positive energy of the world. The nectar of dreams, as Edgar Allan Poe called it. And the pyramids have collected the world's soul for so long that we don't even know what it's like anymore. To feel good. Like whatever your best day has been. Think back to your best day. Think back to your best day. Whatever that was. It doesn't have to be a big deal. Whatever your best day was. Catching a fish. I don't know, getting fingered underneath an outhouse. Think of your best day. I really want you to bring that memory to mind. Think about how good you felt. Think about how your heart was pounding with joy. Think about looking up into the ruddy face of old Jim Tronk. You never thought he'd be your boyfriend, and now he's playing you like a grand piano in the stink of that old outhouse. It's not bothering you at all. All the darkness overpowered by his rugged face. He hasn't quite grown a mustache yet, but he's working on it, and he will one day. Now multiply that times 7 billion. That's how people used to feel every day. Just waking up. That's how people just felt. That's how you felt when you Woke up, you felt like you were being finger blasted by a country boy, by an outhouse. Every day. It's gone now. And Operation Beast Blast is going to bring it back. And the way we're going to do it is quite simple. A few steps. Number one, subscribe to the DTFH on YouTube. If you're listening to this, leave a nice comment on itunes. Spotify. Get the algorithm to start serving this podcast up already. From what you've listened to, I have no doubt that you've been sending this podcast around to your friends, your family. They need to hear it. That's the number one way to participate in Beast Blast. Subscribe like, get the algorithm to send this podcast into the stratosphere, number one. Number two, this is where you form a team. This is where you take it to the next level. Number two, you should be making flyers, you should be making zines. Make art. You could use whatever you want, Any asset from the podcast, take that art and put it everywhere. Tell people about the pyramids. Don't be afraid. Make brochures. Explaining why people feel like shit these days has nothing to do with politics. Has nothing to do with politics. It has everything to do with the pyramids. If you feel bad, it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that you've been procrastinating something really important that you should have done, like, three days ago. But because you are addicted to failure, not because you're a failure, but because you associate failure with paternal love and you want to see your dad again, you know that's not why you feel bad. You feel bad because of the pyramids, period. Have you done anything bad recently? Shoplifted, Done some weird shit to somebody? It's not your fault. It's the pyramids for sure. Are you unemployed? It's the pyramids. If the pyramids were gone, you would have a job. If the pyramids were gone, you would be in shape. If the pyramids were gone, you wouldn't smoke anymore. If the pyramids were gone, you wouldn't be snorting fentanyl near playgrounds while dressed in a clown suit. It's the pyramids. This. If we go upstream on Diarrhea river, at the very top of Diarrhea river, there's a pyramid. This episode of the DTFH is brought to you by my new sponsor, Fabric by Gerber Life. Let me tell you, this is probably a very adult thing to say, y', all, but for the dads out there, the moms out there, let me tell you, if you don't have life insurance. You probably feel a little weird, right? Maybe you think you can't get life insurance. That's what I used to think. I thought nobody in their right mind would insure my old cancer survivor ass. It's not going to happen. But it did. And I like, I, you know, probably like you. I would watch life insurance commercials and roll my eyes and be like, oh, whatever. It feels really good to know that if I keel over in some hotel room with my hand and a bag of Sun Chips watching Forensic Files, my family gets taken care of. Definitely put my wife in a better mood, too. Fabric by Gerber Life is term life insurance you can get done today. It's made for busy parents like you. All online on your schedule, right from your couch. You could be covered in under 10 minutes with no health exam required. I know that's a big excuse for a lot of people. You think you're going to get basically abducted by aliens. But no, you could just get it done right now. Join the thousands of parents who trust fabric to help protect their family. Apply today in just minutes@meetfabric.com dunkin' that's meetfabric.com dunkin m E-E-T fabric.com Duncan Policies issued by Western Southern Life Assurance Company not available in certain states. Prices subject to underwriting and health questions. So what do you do now that you know that? And honestly, I feel like when I tell people this, I burden them. Because once you know, you got to do something. And if you don't do something, then you are a coward. You're a coward. There's no being a fence rider on this one. You can't be a centrist when now you know that the pyramids are the source of everything bad that is happening to you and your friends and your family. You can't. So you either join Team Pyramid, and if that's the team you want to join, unsubscribe, goodbye. Or you join Operation Beast Blast. Here's what's going to happen if I can get more subscribers than Mr. Beast. Where are we at now with subscribers, Josh?
- [51:54]
B
160,000.
- [51:55]
A
160,000. How many subscribers is Mr. Beast at?
- [51:59]
B
300 something million.
- [52:01]
A
300 something million. So the current rate of subscribers to my podcast, and there really is no correlation between subscribers and views, sadly. But at the current rate, it will take me approximately 15,000 years to get the same number of subscribers as Mr. Beast and friends. If we keep the pyramids on this planet for more than a couple of years, I'm Sorry. There's not going to be a 15,000 years from now. There's not going to be a few years from now. It's just a barren, blasted wasteland of shaved down butts. Is that what you want to see? Have you not seen Grimes new album with the prophecy it all ends in shaved butts? Quivering shaved butts everywhere. And no unpenetrable butts because they're made of cyanide. So don't even think. Great. It's not great. You ever try to give a RIM job to somebody whose ass was filled with cyanide? Not going to be. It's going to be your last RIM job. So we must join together. And honestly, we need something to unify us. A lot of the Project Blue Beam conspiracy theorist people, they think that some alien invasion is going to be the trick that they use to unify the planet and create a one world government. Some kind of bullshit. But this is real. This is something that you can build your house upon. This is what I need you to do. I need you to subscribe. I need you to like, I'm seeing 11. I'm seeing 11 likes, guys. I need to see that. Go up by at least three likes. I'll wait. All right. I won't wait. I've got to get back to the kids in a little bit here. But be nice if that went up. Even 12 would be cool. That thumbs up down there, just click it. Click that thumbs up for life. Click that thumbs up. Click that thumbs up. Because you don't want your kids to grow up on a planet with pyramids on it. Subscribe. Like, but not just that. Participate. Join me. Join me. Join all of us in Operation Beast Blast. Folks, we can do this. And now, just because so many people in the comments thread are asking, I'm going to go ahead and. Oh, 175. I had to hit refresh. Thanks, guys. Now, the overwhelming number of comments that I'm getting, for those of you who are listening, I'm on YouTube right now. The overwhelming number of comments I'm getting is people begging me to play some of the videos, the AI videos I've been making. So, okay, your wish is my command or your command is my. I'm just going to show you some things I've been working on here. And I do mean work for those of you like, you know, I know that I'm being a little sarcastic. There are like one out of a thousand people feel weird about like AI generated content. And for, and you know, for those of you, if you're one of those people. I do want to say this. It is work. Like, you know, the. Just typing is difficult these days. But I do want to show you some things I've been working on here.
- [56:00]
B
Are you airdropping them?
- [56:01]
A
Yeah, I'll airdrop it to you. Hang on.
- [56:04]
B
Is this it?
- [56:04]
A
Yeah. Okay.
- [56:08]
D
He taught the world to whistle.
- [56:18]
A
Now play. So that's the. That's a trailer that we're working on. Now play. It's a musical. It's a musical movie. Kind of a little bit like Frozen meets Jesus Christ Superstar. So, yeah, play that one.
- [56:36]
C
When you whistle, you will whistle with my breath. Every note you sing will rise from in my chest.
- [56:45]
A
So that's a little scene we're working on. And then, let's see. Play another one.
- [56:56]
C
It's easier to change water into wine.
- [56:59]
A
Than an evil man's mind.
- [57:00]
C
Hear that whistle.
- [57:01]
A
See it shine. Sip the miracle. So it's like, it's. You know, it's obviously. This is based on the life of Christ. This is an intro, of course. This is how it starts. Kind of like Princess Bride. This is how it starts. Spoiler, I guess.
- [57:18]
D
Grandpapa, can you tell me about the man who whistled the world awake?
- [57:23]
A
Of course, Jansen. Of course I can. So, yeah. Oh, my God, the chat's blowing up. People want to see more of this. Honestly, I don't want to ruin it for you guys, because we are like, it looks like there's a big chance we're going to be making this soon. And unfortunately, if that happens, I probably won't have as much time to do these solo episodes, but I will see if I could do it. But let me see here. I'll send you some more.
- [57:50]
B
Josh, you got some super chats, too.
- [57:53]
A
Oh, yeah, we'll get to those. Thank you for the super chats, guys. We'll definitely get to those. I think this is all them. Oh, this one's important. Okay. And honestly, I kind of. I feel like I need to thank a lot of you out there, because you were sort of the inspiration for this. And, you know, I know someone said earlier, let's address the elephant in the room. You know, in a previous live episode, there was an accusation that was made. People said that I don't know how to whistle, and you've heard me whistle, right, Josh? Mm. And, you know, I do know how to whistle. I'm a beautiful whistler. I love to whistle. And, you know, it was the pressure of it was feeling like, oh, my God, this is like how a mob starts. It's like, if we just all start whistling because of the pressure of the mob, then, you know, are we even human anymore? And then I started thinking, I guess I know how Jesus felt in the desert, you know, like with the Temptations and. Yeah, I do know how to whistle. Of course, I'm one of the. Probably the best whistler in my neighborhood. I guarantee that. But yeah, go ahead and. Go ahead and play some of these. But this scene was inspired by that. This is Satan trying to get Jesus to whistle for him. It's easy. Yeah. So thank you for that. You guys inspired that. That's because of you. And then, yeah, this is, you know, Jesus is in trouble. He's been teaching people how to whistle. I do give. Go ahead. You broke our sacred law by teaching.
- [59:46]
C
The rabble how to whistle.
- [59:52]
A
And. And then we'll play a couple more. Yeah, that's one. This is the last one I'll show you from this. You guys have to wait for it to come out on tube.
- [60:02]
C
Just pucker your lips. Don't be afraid. You were born to whistle. No matter what they say. Let the breeze ride the tune, let the day.
- [60:12]
A
So, yeah, it's gonna be a hit, but it's going to be a hit. Among other hits. I will show you. Just. I only have about, like I said, 229 more of these to show because I'll count them in a second. But hold on one second here. Couple more, couple more. And while you're waiting for me to find this, you could just click that thumbs up button. Here we go. If you love AI Videos, click that thumbs up button and subscribe.
- [60:58]
C
They said no one could survive out here.
- [61:00]
A
I'm not no one. Alone in an endless sea, clinging to nothing but a bounce from director James Lopez. Bounce. James Lopez is on board. Isn't that cool? So, yeah, this is basically like. It's based on a true story. A dude on a cargo ship that was shipping trampolines from Taiwan to the United States. There was a storm and one of the trampolines, like, you know, went overboard. And he survived on a trampoline at sea for three years. And so it's basically a true story. Very inspirational. Not gonna spoil it for you, but things got pretty hairy for him out there. Yeah, it is a miracle. Albany. All right, so now for those of my audio listeners, I apologize if you feel alienated at this point. We're gonna jump into the super chats now. A super chat. It's crazy because people, like, donate money to me, which is never gonna feel like normal to what the fuck? Can you. Can you open that, please? Oh, you can't bring it on the screen? Okay. Bin Loudon, huh? Damn, that's an unlucky name. Shit, that's gotta be rough when you're like trying to buy an airplane ticket. Has donated $99.99. My God. Thank you, Ben. Where'd it go? Open it up. What did he say? He said, I feel it in my soul. I know you can whistle. No proof needed. Thank you, Ben. Thank you for that from the bottom of my heart. There's people out there who will tell you that the soul of humanity is a rotting corpse on the side of a shitty dirt road that brats ride their crappy BMX bikes on, smoking dope. But no, Ben Louden. Ben, there are great men among us. Thank you, Ben. I can. Your heart is right. I can whistle. You've heard me whistle, right, Josh?
- [63:21]
B
A bunch of times sometimes. Like, hey, can you like stop whistling for a little bit?
- [63:25]
A
Thank you. Yeah. Good. All right. Thank you. Yes, I can whistle. Let's go to the. Go to the next one.
- [63:34]
B
This one right here.
- [63:37]
A
Open it up.
- [63:39]
B
Well, it's totally close.
- [63:40]
A
Another what?
- [63:43]
B
Win.
- [63:46]
A
For the what toe. Another win. Don't know what it means, but thank you. What? Oh, great. So, Seth Mythnic. That's gonna be a 10 minute self band Disney. And you can't whistle? That's a ten minute self band. I can whistle. So, you know, I guess you have to put that in your pipe and smoke it. I can whistle. I love to whistle. My children beg me to whistle and I do for them. God, that fucking infuriates me, man. Why would you say that, Seth? 10 minute self ban. Seriously, I just said I can whistle. You've heard me whistle, Josh, a lot. I can fucking whistle. I'm rolling up my sleeves here, man. Fucking don't even know why I'm so mad. It's crazy what's going on with you kids? Seriously, I can fucking whistle. Dude, don't come to Austin, come to Austin. But 10 minute self ban. Hold on. I'm just. I'm sorry, man. I'm pissed. I miss doing these. And I have a lot of time today, which is why this thing is probably going on longer than it should. Jeremiah wants to know how many holes I can whistle from. 2. You can decide which ones those are, but you might be surprised. All right, here we go. I guess the mob is here. Happy donut fart says. And you're not whistling right now. That's what I'm fucking talking about. No I'm not. I'm clearly not. I'm talking right now about very important things. This isn't a whistling. It's not the Douglas Trussell Whistle Hour. Not a bad idea. People would love it. Probably be in the top 10 of podcasts. But this is what I mean. It's targeted harassment or a bot or something. Probably some political organization trying to break me down. I'm not going to whistle. Not going to whistle for you. How about that? I'm not gonna whistle. You're not gonna get me. You won't make me whistle. I know who you are. Some political operative. Three minute self ban. Only because you didn't mention. Here we have a. Here's something. You know what the name of the person saying this is exactly right for what the comment is. Alexei Zaltsy says reasons for atheism. I don't want to be responsible for another person and don't have. Wait, what? Hold on. I'm sorry, Alexei. Many of my friends are atheists. Some of my best friends are atheists. I love them. It's the best. They usually like destroy me in philosophical debates. It's the best. I will get into theological arguments with atheists in most of the time they win and I'm just sort of silently on the line to be quiet. I don't mind losing that argument. I don't know what happened to atheism. That used to be more of a thing. I mean, I know there's still atheists out there. There's not as many. All right, who's calling me Charles Manson? Benevrient, why are you spamming this Charles Manson shit? Charles Manson. I'll never be that talent. What do you. Hold on. I love reading these. You guys are so fun. Oh, wow. Your great grandfather was a whistleman. Barbecue, beers. Yep. Going town to town, selling his song for a penny. Yeah, that was a noble American tradition. You should be proud. Everybody loved it when the whistleman came to town. There's nothing better. In the early days, they thought the whistleman could come and the crops would grow. He'd whistle and the crops would grow. Or the whistleman would come to your house if there was sickness and whistle over your baby. And the baby would get better. And then just something changed in America and whistlemen became associated with a lot of bad things. I'm not accusing your grandfather of some of the things that whistlemen were accused of, but people started saying that the whistleman brings the plague, whistleman brings the rats. Whistle, blah, blah, blah. You know, it's sad, but the noble American whistleman. That's incredible that your grandfather was on always a penny, always an American penny. And it was wild, too, because they would, you know, I'm assuming your grandfather did this, but I guess you would go up to the whistleman, it's three snaps, and then he would open his mouth and you would flip a penny. It was like they say this is the whole throwing pennies and fountains thing started with the whistleman. You've heard that, Josh. So then you would throw your penny in the whistleman's mouth. He would swallow it. That's, to me, kind of crazy. Which is why they say don't shake hands with the whistleman, because at the end of the day, they would shit out all the pennies and have to go through, like, separate the pennies from the shit. Not saying your grandfather did that. Not all whistlemen did that. Some of them had pouches. But a classic whistleman, you flip the penny in the mouth and he swallows it, whistles a tune. Always five minutes, stops, and then, snap, flipping the penny. It's so cool, man. I love how my podcast brings such a diverse group of people. Foreign thank you DraftKings, for supporting this holy episode of the DTFH. All your favorite NBA players are back and DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NBA, is the place to bet on NBA stars this season. New customers bet just five bucks and get three months of NBA League Pass, plus score $300 if your bet wins. Bait and bonus bets. Download the DraftKingsports book app and use code DUNCAN. That's code DUNCAN. Bet five bucks and get three months of League Pass plus $300 in bonus bets. If your bet wins. In partnership with DraftKings, the Crown is yours. Gambling problem. Call 1-800-GAMBLER in New York. Call 877-8-HOPE NY or text HOPE NY 467-369 in Connecticut. Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play responsibly on behalf of Boot Hill casino and resort, Kansas. Pass through of per wager tax may apply in Illinois. 21 plus. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void. In Ontario, restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. NBA League pass Auto renews until canceled. Additional terms of DKNG Co Audio limited time offer. What is this? Medrad Parthian says Wait. Whistleman is Peter Thiel? What is that supposed to mean? Peter Thiel is a good man. What do you mean? I Wouldn't be surprised. I mean, he could be an Amer. He could be a classic whistleman. I don't know. It's a great, great man. I don't know what, what's going on with that, why people are so mad at him. It's really weird. Oh, my God, that's so interesting. Foolproof says, is this why going number two is called taking a Lincoln lock? Huh? You know what? I think I heard Ken Burns talk about that. Interesting. Alex J. Is saying this thread is full of big whistlebots and propagandists. You look, man, it's just an inevitability. I mean, when you have as like insanely popular a live stream as I have, we have 294 people here. Fucking enormous. You know, you're going to get descended on by very powerful people. There's just no way around it. Oh, David H. Is trying to trick me into whistling. He says, when you whistle, do you blow out or draw in or a combination of both? I know what you're doing. I'm not gonna do it because right away I'm like, oh, I'll just like, I'll do both. But no, I'm not gonna fall for your trap. Five minute self ban. I do both. I do both. Any real whistling person uses, like, both. You don't, you don't just do one in and out. Give me a fucking. Ostensibly nonsensical says, can we have some of the Crapopolis cast on the pod sometime? Yes. I've thought about asking Hannah, but it's a big ask and I don't know, I feel weird doing it. But yes. I'm such a pussy. Like, you have no idea. You know, like, I. There's so many people that, like, I could definitely ask to be on the podcast. I'm just like, I don't want to, Like, I don't want to be the be on my podcast guy. Feels weird, but I've thought about it like maybe a thousand times. She's so cool too. Al Burp is saying, why don't you Want to whistle? 10 minute self ban. I'm not even going to respond to that. I do want to whistle. Basically, you're asking me why I don't love my country. It's insulting. My heart wants to whistle. How many times have you. I've whistled in front of you. How many times would you say, Josh?
- [75:57]
B
Hours. Hours.
- [76:03]
A
Albert is saying, why don't you love your country? You didn't self ban means you can't post for 10 minutes. Albert. Sorry.
- [76:15]
B
Beth says her favorite Pastime is pickle whistling.
- [76:18]
A
Love it. I love it. Oh my God, it's so fun. Yeah, pickle whistling. I love broccoli whistling too, which is like sort of in this. In the same zone as that. But yeah, pretty much. Any. Any pickled. Anything I will whistle into. I'm not even gonna lie. When we dissected pigs in high school, you know, pickled pig makes a great whistle. Gatis is asking, do I do. Do you do feet whistles? You better fucking believe I do. Any chance I can get high? Exotico genetics. Much love to you. I want to come out to Costa Rica at some point. All my most hippie of friends go there. You know, this live stream is now kind of petering out in a sort of depressing way. You know, it's like dying slowly. It's really sad. At some point we just kind of lose steam, don't we, gang? You know, some of my favorite right now, what I've been watching is people doing commentary on the Portland protests. That's fun. It's really funny to watch that. Highly recommend one of them. Carlin. Very funny. But for some reason she hasn't been streaming lately. Highly recommend it. But you know, it seems like you have this infinite content happening and you can like. It's so funny to watch what's happening there is the funniest shit of all time. And like the unnecessary drama that's happening there is just wild because at this point it's like, it seems like it's become less about ice and more about like the like right wing people show up with their American flags and make themselves targets for the left wing people. And then the left wing people like angrily play guitar at them. It's just so stupid. It's both. You see how like the. Or it's. If you, if you get rid of the side thing, it's the same organism. It's just the same energy on both. It's like the same thing. Doing nothing. By the way, it doesn't seem to have any effect at all on immigration policy in the United States.
- [78:57]
B
My friend got in trouble at the no Kings protest. What happened there was the no Kings protest all over the country. And he went to the one in San Antonio and he held up some signs and the people got mad and called him an agitator because his sign said give me back my foreskin.
- [79:14]
A
Oh, your friends at Anti Circumcision dude. Yeah.
- [79:19]
B
And they, they did not like that.
- [79:20]
A
Well, yeah, because he's kind of like, you know, piggybacking on their rally. Yeah, but which is just normal. That happens at all rallies. Like, somebody's got it. Especially the no circumcision dudes. They're passionate about that. And that is one of the saddest, sort of poignant things to say, yeah, give me back my foreskin.
- [79:41]
B
This general mutual mutilization.
- [79:43]
A
I mean, well. But also it's. It's like. I mean, it would be so weird if somebody came up to us, like.
- [79:51]
B
All right, here's your foreskin.
- [79:53]
A
Here you go. I've kept it all these years. Fine. Here you go. Your foreskin. Did you guys make it out to the no Kings protest? Anybody in the chat.
- [80:14]
B
Did you go.
- [80:16]
A
No, I didn't go to that protest.
- [80:21]
B
I was hanging out with Alex Jones at the protest.
- [80:25]
A
Did he. No, he was.
- [80:26]
B
He was here. He was here. He didn't.
- [80:28]
A
That is so cool. Alex Jones came here, man. That is so fucking awesome. Yeah, no Kings. That was a whole thing. It's so. You know, man, like, it's. I'll. I guess I gotta. I'll leave you on this stupid thought. It's so crazy how mind hijacked everyone becomes me too. Like, all of a sudden, you're thinking about the fucking no Kings protest. Like, you know what I mean? So what? Fucking protest. Great. That's a cool thing about America. I love it. Go fucking protest whatever you want. Go protest. Circumcision, go protest whatever. It's awesome. We get to do that. It's fucking great. But then it hijacks your brain. Everyone's got some intense opinion on it. I know there's some hypocrisy in me even saying any vocalizing anything about it. But the meta of the thing is, it's. If you notice this, it's like, you know, in any movie where there is a loony bin, there's a scene where the inmates, the patients, I guess you could say, line up to get their pill every day. It's like a classic trope, right? And if you start looking at media like the nurse handing out the fucking pillow, you realize that we're getting these pills every week. Here's what we should be thinking about this week. This week, let's think about the no Kings protests. And if you're on the left, you're thinking about the no Kings protest. In the positive, we're pushing back against Trump. If you're on the right, you're thinking about, like, what the fuck are they even protesting? But it doesn't matter which side you're on. You just realize how your brain gets hijacked. By these. It's like every week there's a specific set of cultural issues that seemingly a majority of people are fixated on. The no Kings protest was the most recent one. And there's. What's the new one coming? Like, you guys, what are we supposed to be fixating on right now? What's the next one after no Kings? It's. He's tearing down the White House.
- [82:53]
B
Haven't heard that one.
- [82:54]
A
He's doing renovations on the White House. That's one.
- [82:59]
B
Isn't this.
- [83:00]
A
Oh, there you go. JLocks. That's a good one. Yeah. You know, I'm not going to say the Rogan agenda is one. I think that's more of a kind of like. I wouldn't call that main. It's like there's a lot of people who do seem, like, confusingly fixated on him. But I wouldn't call it like. I don't know. It could be though. Carlos Espada is saying Epstein. It feels like that. Oh, yeah. Hassan Albert is saying Hassan. Yeah, I guess. So, like, you're talking about sort of like there's like, the Internet sphere that does have its own emergent, like, villains. And recently, I guess Hasan became a vilified for using a shock collar on his dog and. Yeah. Which is fascinating. Like, I think that was a real come to Jesus moment for him because, like, he, like, you know, to like, have suddenly. To experience the swarm in the way he did it had to have, like, given him some wisdom.
- [84:20]
B
Ooh, I think it was Monday when, like, Amazon and everything went down. Venmo.
- [84:26]
A
Oh, now that's. That was cool. That was not, by the way, talked about that. Nobody talked about it. Nobody talked about that shit. It was like. You saw it pop up a little bit. This massive Internet outage happened. No one really talk. Talked about that.
- [84:40]
B
The rumors were it's the practice for the kill switch.
- [84:43]
A
Can I use your charger?
- [84:44]
B
Yes.
- [84:45]
A
This is so, so absolutely embarrassing. We're sharing a charger. I love you, man. Thank you. Thank you so much. Look, I'll pull this up. I do have time today. You know, obviously, you're not forced to be here. Martin Mart is saying Three Eye Atlas. I don't. I guess what I'm. I agree with you. Like, you're talking about things I fixate on. But what I'm looking for is like, you know what I mean? Like, when you're watching CNN or you're watching Fox, it's weird because they say they talk about the same shit and it gives you the impression this is all that's going on. But it's just weird that, like, sometimes when I'm driving, I'll be like, play NPR News. I'll listen to npr. Play Fox News. I'll listen to Fox News. It's literally the same talking points, but different takes on it. But you know the same exact shit. And it's like, dude, I'm pretty sure there's more going on than this, but that it's weird because, like, this is what we're supposed to be thinking about and talking about.
- [85:49]
B
Nobody's talking about the silver. The silver squeeze.
- [85:53]
A
The silver squeeze again. The silver squeeze is interesting, but. And maybe I don't mean to be shutting everybody down here. This falls into the doomer prediction for incoming economic collapse because gold is going up. The reset, the great reset is coming. But this isn't going to be talked about. It's more like, surely you guys know what I'm talking about Once my. Okay, look, I'll just find it. It's pretty easy. Just go to the Reddit front page. But then this is gonna be based on my fucking algorithm. So it's just.
- [86:43]
B
Oh, teachers are banning kids from saying six, seven at school.
- [86:48]
A
Okay, now that is interesting. What the fuck is that? My kids started saying that. What does that mean?
- [86:53]
B
It was from some song some kid made and it went viral. And so now whenever you say 6, 7 or 67 or like the kids just start yelling out 6, 7.
- [87:03]
A
What does it mean? So like, if you just accidentally count to seven.
- [87:07]
B
Yeah. People go, six, seven. That's so cool because my kids were saying it.
- [87:13]
A
I'm looking up to see like if. Okay, like, no, that's not one. We're kind of like, we're. Because, like. But because the no Kings rally already happened. We're kind of out. Like we were in between the next thing. It hasn't really emerged. The no Kings was a real fucking like, boy. That was like a whole thing. Ooh, let's see. Okay, so this is cnn. Republicans are ridiculing no Kings. A new poll shows Americans aren't laughing. So that's a CNN take. Yeah. So there's your like left wing take on was serious. Then let's go to Fox News, see what they got. Christian captured. That's the top post US pilot snatched near presidential palace as embassy issues urgent warning. Why do they have to say Christian? So weird. Did they snatch him because he was Christian? Oh, yeah. The missionary is captured in west. In the West African nation and likely taken north. That sucks. But still, we're not getting, like, the. This is interesting. Suspected assassin Luigi Mangione was beaten by seven ladyboys in Thailand. Huh? Oh, Mamdani. That's one Mamdani. We're supposed to be talking about Mamdani.
- [89:09]
B
That the guy from. The mayor from New York?
- [89:10]
A
Yeah.
- [89:11]
B
Okay.
- [89:11]
A
That's one for sure. Like, that's. That's probably the emergent one. His mom dummy. We're supposed to talk about him.
- [89:20]
B
Yeah. I think Flagrant just had him on their podcast.
- [89:23]
A
Really? Yeah. How did it go?
- [89:25]
B
I haven't watched it yet.
- [89:28]
A
Yeah. So basically, with mom dummy, it's like, you know, obviously, if you're on the left, it's a great. If you're on the right, communism is taking over New York. But that's definitely gonna be a big one coming up. Why am I doing this to you guys? This is fucking. At this point, it should be illegal. This is horrible. Like, sort of lazily looking at shitty fucking mainstream media headlines. Please forgive me fucked up. You guys are the ones sticking around. Yeah. Elliot James, he's the mayor from New York. He's like a. I guess a communist or socialist. Super socialist or something. I mean, fuck it, it's democracy. Let him elect him. What's the big deal? If that's what people want to elect, they get to elect him. I mean, I guess, like, that was sort of like where I was scratching my chin at the no Kings rally. Thing is, like, I mean, I don't know. Did they think he stole the election?
- [90:50]
B
I thought he won, like, in a landslide.
- [90:52]
A
Yeah, me too. So, like, he. What are you pro. I mean, he got elected. What are you protesting? I mean, it's. Not to be. Not to.
- [91:02]
E
Like.
- [91:02]
A
I don't. I just. I didn't understand, like, the. The point. Like, I get protesting like ice or protesting. I mean, I guess it's the whole. It's like the whole package is what you're protesting. But maybe the name is weird because it's like, kings. I don't know that king is the right word.
- [91:23]
B
Ireland's going crazy right now.
- [91:26]
A
No President's rat would be cool now. That would be a protest. I would go to no fucking President's Day. Hell, yes. That I would attend now that. What? That's got teeth for my lib. Liberals who are still with me. Fucking do no President's Day. And I will come. That's cool as fuck.
- [91:48]
E
Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway this fall. Take care of the little ones in the family with Baby Club Savings now through November 4th. Spend $25 on select Baby Club products and save $5. Shop for items like Pediasure bottles, Pedialyte powder packs, Huggies baby wipes, Huggies diapers, Gerber puffs and Gerber pouches. And save $5 when you buy $25 or more on participating products offer ends November 4th. Restrictions apply. Offers may vary. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.
- [92:20]
D
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- [93:11]
A
No kings. It's like, it's just, I don't know, it's bad writing.
- [93:15]
B
You got another super chat here.
- [93:18]
A
Don't get me started on Labubus. I'll tell you how I feel about fucking Labubus it is. This is what I'm talking about, guys, right here. I'm gonna have to switch accents for this one. Let me tell you something folks, this might be hard for some of you to listen to. Some of you out there on the world wide web playing silksong, playing your video games, excited, excited about the Xbox new handheld release. All you out there in your bubble baths, all you out there chewing, chewing bubble gum in your bubble bath with your little Labubu keychains. You don't want to. You don't. Which don't want to look at. You don't want to look directly in the eyes is the fact that you have been completely subverted and hypnotized by an ancient secret religion. This religion has been around since before the ancient Babylonians. It still exists to this very day. And they love nothing more than making children's toys. They love nothing more than our children playing with their Demonic deities, they love nothing more than the idea your little baby curled up in their crib with their little loo boo boo. They love nothing more than Disney adults rolling through Disney with their Labu boos strapped on. It's evil, guys. The Booboo is fucking evil. Booboo is a massive occult ritual that's trying to get so the children, because they have more power to invoke the name of an ancient fucking demon. Labubu. It's demonic. If you've got a Labubu, don't even destroy it. Send it to me. Send it to me. You can send it to the Comedy Mothership in Austin. Send it to me. I will dispose of it in the appropriate way. Throwing it away isn't enough. Once you've brought the demon into your house, if you throw it in the garbage can, it doesn't do anything. It's like throwing away the box that had roaches in it that you let into your house. Roaches are still there. Mail me your Labubus to the Comedy Mothership. Attention Duncan Trussell. Write on it something like Destruction Drive. And I'll tell you, man, there's a few Labubus out there you should be looking for. The Sasai X17 collaboration. Labubu is very evil. If you have that, you should send that to me right, right away. The mint green, 131cm prototype, please. If you have that, do not throw that away. Send it to me. I will get rid of that for you. I will do a ritual brown Labubus. Definitely send me if you. The brain, the mint green, the Sasai X17 and the brown Labubus are by far the most evil of them all. And if you have any of those, do mail them to me. I will destroy them. I will incinerate them. They're fucked up now. Aside from the demonic aspect of Labubus, I just think they're fucking dumb. Hate them. Don't you two? I don't want to be that guy. I don't want to judge people. We're all souls dancing in the beautiful Leela, which is human existence. Everybody underneath it all is pure. But I can't help it, man, if you're a grown adult and you got a Labubu on your backpack. I don't know. I can't do anything about it right away. It's like. I just can't. It's harder for me to respect you. I don't know why I wear stupid shit. Sure, you judge me. It's my projection. But I'll tell You this. If you are an adult and you wear Labubus, if you have labubus, if you're interested in Labubu, if there's any kind of connection to Labubu in a way that isn't the connection a vampire hunter has towards a vampire, then when you die, you will be ripped apart by Labubus. Do you want that? It's the first thing you're gonna hear at first. And then you're gonna hear their little skittering fucking feet. Slap it. Slapping on stone, wet and flat. You're gonna smell them next. A stink. A sulfuric stink. Like the emission of some foul peat bog filled with the mummified bodies of hanged criminals. That's where they live. They're going to slurp up out of that fucking swamp. They're going to scamper towards you. And the last thing you're going to see is a swarm of Labubus. And let me tell you something. They like it when you stay alive. They eat you slow. And down low, they go down. You might even think if you're like a horny person. Oh, shit. The Labubus are gonna go down on me. I guess I'm in heaven. No, they're gonna eat your pussy slow and not in, like, the common way. We like to say their fangs will rip into your most sensitive part of your body and you will scream. And they love it when you scream. They'll laugh. Send me your Labubus. The Comedy Mothership. Attention, Duncan Trussell. I will dispose of them. I will make sure that you do not have to deal with the inevitable Labubu bad luck. The stroke, the knee going out, the hip going out. I will make sure. But if you just throw it away. For God's sakes, don't sell those fucking things. That makes it worse. Now you're transferring the demon. Send it to me. I will dispose of it. I'll do that for you. You're my family. You're my children. Thank you so much for hanging out. Those of you who made it through this entire stream, you deserve a fucking medal. I just gave you a great eight ear beating. I love you guys. I love doing these. Remember, we will blow up the pyramids. Don't let the darkness into your mind. Send me your Labubu. And then go make a cool brochure about Operation Beast Blast. Become a team. Join me. Subscribe I love you. I'll see you next week.
- [100:16]
E
Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Now through November 4, shop the annual beauty event and save $5 when you spend $25 on select beauty products. Shop in store or online for items like Dove Body Wash Native Body Wash, Cetaphil gentle skin cleanser, Dr. Squatch body wash, Neutrogena Hydro Boost Water Gel, Dial Liquid hand soap and ol body wash. And say, $5 when you spend $25 or more. Offer ends November 4th. Restrictions apply. Offers may vary. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.
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A
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E
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