Episode 5: EMO Podcast with Cags & Kyle

Summary

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East Moriches Podcast with Cags & Kyle

Episode 5: The Anxious Generation—Community, Parenting & Technology
Release Date: June 26, 2026

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Overview

In this summer kickoff and fifth episode of the East Moriches Podcast, hosts Michelle "Cags" Cagliano and Kyle Gorton bring together the school community for a deep and honest conversation centered on Jonathan Haidt’s influential book, The Anxious Generation. The episode features two East Moriches parents, Heather Bencosmi and Michelle Fernandez, who share their firsthand experiences, hopes, and challenges in raising children in an age of technology, social change, and rising youth anxiety. This reflective discussion is part of an ongoing dialogue for building resilience, healthy boundaries, and a stronger, more supportive environment for students.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Parent Introductions and Background

• [01:33] The guests introduce themselves and their children:

  • Heather Bencosmi: Mother of Clayton (10, entering 5th grade) and Maybelle (8, entering 4th grade).
  • Michelle Fernandez: Mom to Lily (5th grade) and Lucy (entering 4th grade).

2. Origins of Tech-Conscious Parenting and Shared Values

• [02:27 - 04:39] Both parents discuss “how they got here” as intentional, tech-conscious parents:

  • Fernandez recalls being advised by her pediatrician to keep infants away from screens, which led to early, stringent screen avoidance. She also refused to post her kids on social media and joined other moms in signing a "Wait Until 8th" pledge to delay smartphones.
  • Bencosmi reflects on her own tech-free upbringing and interest in child brain development as reasons for prioritizing reading with her children and keeping screens away until absolutely needed (“so much easier to not start at all than to give it and then take it away.” [05:31–05:53]).

3. The Power of Parental Community and Collective Action

• [04:10–04:39; 12:11–12:42; 25:00–26:24] The significance of organizing with like-minded parents is repeatedly emphasized:

  • "If you all, like, commit to it, it makes it so much easier..." —Michelle Fernandez [06:04]
  • The moms’ “Wait Until 8th” group provides shared support and eases the social pressure on both parents and kids.
  • Hosts and guests suggest formalizing this kind of commitment at kindergarten orientation to “start them little.”

4. Struggles: Social Exclusion, FOMO, and Setting Boundaries

• [06:36–07:47; 13:04–14:39] The guests share the hardest moments:

  • Managing children’s sense of being left out (missing group chats, not knowing about outfit trends).
  • “Navigating being set apart is difficult...having to counteract that and say it’s okay to be an individual.” —Heather Bencosmi [07:03]
  • Deciding when and how to give limited tech access: Family iPad use, short supervised calls, and setting clear stipulations.

5. Proud Parenting Practices and Finding the Middle Ground

• [09:28–12:42; 15:56–16:42]
  • Using video games as family bonding time.
  • Open, honest conversations about the risks of cell phones and digital life.
  • Bringing back the landline—a fun, functional workaround that strengthens social skills. “The excitement of running to the phone and picking it up…” —Michelle Fernandez [12:11]
  • Gizmo Watches as a compromise: “She can call or text me and my husband...so that I feel like gives me a little bit of like, okay, you can go off and do what you need to do…” —Michelle Fernandez [15:56]

6. Safety, Independence, & Real-World Risks

• [17:46–20:08]
  • Weighing physical vs. online safety: Most parents now see online dangers (predators, privacy) as more threatening than public spaces or bike rides.
  • “That, to me, is more dangerous than them riding their bike with their friends...” —Heather Bencosmi [17:51]
  • Teaching kids to assess real-world situations and people, promoting independence and critical judgment (“You teach them how to behave in public, how to recognize things that are normal, not normal in public” —Kyle Gorton [19:29])

7. Uncertainty and Openness about the Future

• [21:22–23:54]
  • Parents admit they don’t have all the answers: What will happen in 8th grade? How will tech evolve?
  • Considering monitored phones and gradual trust-building rather than “total snooping.”
  • “I don’t know yet...the times, time will tell” —Michelle Fernandez [22:31]
  • Bencosmi: “I just don’t even want to think about it...Maybe we’ll all get flip phones.” [23:32–23:54]

8. Parental Mental Health & Social Media Boundaries

• [23:35–23:54]
  • Michelle Fernandez shares her own social media detox: “It’s been really good for my mental health...sometimes those community posts in Facebook...they make you think that there’s someone literally on every corner doing something bad, and that’s not the case.”

9. Key Takeaways and Actionable Advice

• [25:00–26:41]
  • The need for supportive community among parents.
  • Start conversations and commitments early (e.g., at school orientation).
  • Keep adapting; “what feels right now” is enough—openness and flexibility are crucial.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On early tech avoidance:
  “From the very second they were born, I was, like, afraid of the screen...We saw. Signed a pledge to wait till 8th.” —Michelle Fernandez [03:08]
• On sticking together as parents:
  “If you all, like, commit to it, it makes it so much easier…” —Michelle Fernandez [06:04]
• On missing out but staying true:
  “Navigating being set apart is difficult because the world tells you that you should be acting this way...Having to counteract that and say it’s okay for you to be an individual.” —Heather Bencosmi [07:03]
• On rethinking safety:
  “That, to me, is more dangerous than them riding their bike with their friends…” —Heather Bencosmi [17:51]
• On letting go:
  “As I’m progressing as a parent, I’m able to let go a little bit more of that freedom because I know I wouldn’t want them home being isolated.” —Heather Bencosmi [18:47]
• On community impact:
  “The biggest thing that, like, for me, like, in talking to both of you is like, what made a huge difference is like the Community of other parents on the same page.” —Kyle Gorton [25:00]
• On future uncertainty:
  “I just don’t even want to think about it.” —Heather Bencosmi [23:32]
• On adapting to what works:
  “There was a lot of like, I don't, I don't knows, but in a real, like, in a good way...This is what we're doing. It's working right now. Who knows in two years.” —Kyle Gorton [26:32]

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Timestamps for Key Moments

• Parent introductions: [01:33]
• How parenting choices formed: [02:27]
• Parental support group (“Wait Until 8th”): [04:10], [06:04]
• FOMO and handling peer pressures: [06:36], [13:04]
• Landline story: [12:11]
• Gizmo Watch and safety: [15:56]
• Discussion on real-world risk vs. online danger: [17:51]
• Talking about monitored/flip phones and evolving tech: [21:22], [23:32]
• Social media detox benefits: [23:35]
• Three key takeaways, importance of community action: [25:00]
• Final remarks/advice: [26:24]

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Themes and Tone

The episode is warm, thoughtful, and supportive—never judgmental, with all speakers candidly acknowledging uncertainty and complexity. Guests celebrate their wins, admit mistakes, and emphasize community, collective action, and flexibility above prescriptive parenting.

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Summary Takeaway

This episode offers a realistic, hopeful, and actionable look at raising children in a digital age—emphasizing that the challenges of technology and youth anxiety must be met by the whole community, with open communication, shared commitment, gradual trust-building, and healthy boundaries. Listeners are empowered to start small, find their community, and continue learning together—because, as the hosts affirm, "meaningful change happens when a community learns, listens, and moves forward together."

Transcript

[A]

Foreign.

[B]

Welcome back to the East Merches Podcast with Kags and Kyle, where we discuss kids, technology, and growing up in today's world. I'm Michelle Cagliano, AKA Kags.

[C]

And I'm Kyle Gorton, AKA Kyle. And we have, as you can see, a very special episode today. Our fifth and fifth, fifth and final episode of the school year. This is our summer kickoff episode. We have two guests with us as we've been discussing throughout the whole school year. The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. We decided to interview two Eastmurch's parents about their experiences parenting and trying to reverse the great rewiring as we've talked about and have. Give their kids a great childhood.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

So we have Heather Bencosmi here and Michelle Fernandez, Both of their children. I had both of their. Both of their. Both children. Two children each. I was lucky enough to have both of them. And they volunteered their time to come in. We thank you for coming. And the reason why you came to mind when we were thinking about parents and just interviewing other people is because you have made such a positive impact on your children. I've seen it in the classroom with your own children. And we want that to move forward. So we want to influence other parents to do what you're doing. You're doing such a great job.

[A]

Thank you so.

[B]

Thank you.

[D]

Thank you. So,

[B]

Kyle, I think you have the first question.

[C]

Oh, I've already messed up. All right. I made the first mistake, guys, so no pressure.

[B]

Well, do you want to talk about yourselves and, like, tell us about how many children you have, what ages you want to go first?

[A]

Sure. My eldest son is Clayton. He's 10 years old and he's going into fifth grade.

[B]

And he just one more spelling bee.

[A]

Proud of him. So proud of him. And then Maybelle is eight and she'll be going into fourth grade next year. So great kids. They're the best.

[B]

They are.

[D]

And then I have two girls. I have Lily, who is currently in fifth grade in our middle school in East Marches, and I have Lucy, who is with Mabel in third grade going into fourth next year.

[A]

So.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And Kyle, maybe you'll have one.

[C]

Both of them, hopefully. Actually, I will.

[B]

You will?

[C]

I will. I will. I teach every. Every seventh grader. Yeah, for the most part. So I will have them both, maybe.

[A]

So you're gonna get Lily first.

[C]

Lily first. So before we get into, like, actual, like, questions about the book, like, one of the things Michelle and I talked about the first set was like, how did we get here? Meaning, like, were on the podcast about this topic. So where do you feel like, what led you to being, I don't want to say passionate about, but interested in this topic or really, like, you know, where it's. I'm going to be extra intentional about the way that I raise my kids around technology and parenting in a certain way and not just, like, letting the culture of the world kind of parent them if you want to, if there's specific moments or books you read or just that's always the way that you have.

[D]

So I was listening to one of your previous podcasts, and I heard you say something, and it triggered something that I remembered from when my kids were really small. Our pediatrician, when they were babies, said not to face our kids in front of the TV screen. So I remember when they were very, very little, I had this crazy. I was like, my mom would babysit, I'd run in and I turn them around and they wouldn't. They'd have to face against the wall. So they weren' at the screens at all. So I feel like from the very second they were born, I was, like, afraid of the screen. Like, that was something that was driven into our heads. So we were really passionate about that. And I also didn't want my kids to be on social media, so I never let anybody post pictures of them when they were very young. I never wanted them to be tagged. And then as they got older, I made some really amazing mom friends, and all of us kind of gathered together and we saw. Signed a pledge to wait till 8th.

[B]

That's amazing.

[D]

I think, like, in kindergarten.

[B]

Wow.

[D]

And we all did this virtual, like, thing where we signed our pledge and we all gathered together and said, we're not going to get our kids smartphones until they're at least in 8th or past 8th.

[B]

And that's really the point. Right. Of this book and of this movement. Right. Is to wait. They don't need it. So young. Right. And if you can get that group together like you have, you guys have an amazing group. Yeah. You know, we want other parents to feel like they're not alone and they can also do the same thing. That's amazing. I didn't know that.

[A]

I grew up in an age where we didn't have technology, so I'm still stuck back there. And I've always been into brain development, child development development, and I'm fascinated by neuropathways, and so I'm always looking at that. And I just decided early on we would read. And they didn't watch TV for the first year until I had the second one. And then I was like, oh, my gosh, I need a tv. And ever since then, it's just kind of built off of that. And Clayton now is 10. So 10 years ago, technology wasn't as advanced. So back then, I was like, okay, whatever. Now it's so intense that I'm really happy that we've already put that guardrail rail in place, because it's so much

[B]

easier to not start at all than to give it and then take it away, you know? So, like, you're really on the right track, because they don't know any different. Right. This is their life. Right. Whereas, like, my son, I. I gave in when he was in fifth grade, and now it's like, how do you pull back? It's really hard, you know? So I wish I had waited. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, that's.

[C]

It is funny because we. I think. I don't know if the episode has come out yet, but I think it was in our last episode. We plugged the. Wait until 8th.

[D]

We do that.

[C]

Yeah. That's awesome.

[B]

That is awesome.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I love that.

[D]

I feel like at kindergarten, they should just be like, all right, get your group of friends. And then if you all, like, commit to it, it makes it so much easier because, like, my older daughter, her friends are in the grade above her, so all of them, they have no cell phones. Right. The children in her grade, a lot of them do have cell phones. And it becomes that struggle where she's kind of missing out on different social situations where you. All the kids decide they want to wear shorts to school tomorrow, and she doesn't get that text because she doesn't have a phone.

[B]

Right.

[D]

She comes in with pants and that, you know, it's something little where she's missing, but it's something that does kind of affect her. Makes her almost like a little bit of an outcast.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

But it's part of navigating the whole. The whole thing.

[B]

So then in the long run, I think it'll be better for her.

[D]

Yeah, I think so, too. I hope so.

[B]

So what do you think your biggest struggle is as a parent when it comes to technologies and screens besides fomo? Yeah. Missing out. What do you think?

[A]

I was going to say that navigating being set apart is difficult because the world tells you that you should be acting this way, you should be doing this. And they're so easily influenced by everything around them, what they're seeing and what they're taking in. So having to counteract that and say it's okay for you to be an individual, it's okay for you to not do these things. And I'm here to help you navigate that. I think that's hard because I'm also. This is my first time.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, so I think trying to figure out what's best for our family, what's best for our children and keeping them content in that. Yeah,

[D]

I agree with that.

[C]

Yeah. And I think, yeah, I think even like you said, it is hard too because it's like right now, like my son is 16 months old, so I have all these great lofty ideas of what we will and won't do. And then it's like, then you're like, you said, like, this is my first time being a parent too. Like, this is my, like every time they get to the next stage. This is my first time parenting an 11 year old. First time parenting 12 year old first. So, you know, and it's, and then with every kid, again, I don't have, I don't have two, so I don't know. But like being a teacher and seeing siblings and being like, whoa, you are not like your older brother or sometimes like, wow, I'm gonna call you your sister's name because you just, you know, spitting image type things. But there is that thing of like, everyone's doing their best with what they have and, and you know, by the time you're like a 20 year veteran of being a parent, like, they're on, you know, so you have, you know, not to. Not in, not in a sad way, you have one shot, but almost like, you know, just making the most of it. And like, kind of like you said, Michelle, like, this is our family. So it's like, if I only have one shot with my kids, like, why would I give in to the peer pressure of like, this is what everybody else is doing.

[D]

Right.

[C]

I really like that. So maybe on a more positive side, what are some things that something or some things that you feel like, all right, when it comes to this, like that the technology, the screens that you and your family do well, or you just something almost maybe like you're proud of. Like, I'm proud that like with my kids we do this or we decided not to do this. I know you spoke a little bit about that, but anything that comes to mind when it's like, oh, well, one thing I like that our family does blank this way.

[D]

I don't know, I think when we, like as a family, for me, you know, we don't. I'm not saying no video games and stuff in the House, but we'll play em together as a family, so we kind of experience that together. I'm really very open with my kids. I kind of tend to talk to them like they are adults. So a lot of times they'll hear me say, you know, the reasons why we don't have cell phones is because it could be damaging or, you know, there's all sorts of reasons behind it. And I think that being really open with them helps and they can pinpoint and see things that they don't want to do as well. So, like, it's funny because we read the book the Glow Kids. One of the pieces in there, he talks about how he's in a foreign country and kids are just playing on computer. And I think I spoke to my kids about that and we went on vacation and there was kids sitting on the beach on their phones and it was this beautiful landscape. And I'm like, how are they not seeing this? So they, they will look and be like, that's so sad that that kid's doing it right now. And then they, they tend to focus more on what activity we're doing. And they, they like to, you know, talk about it and really acknowledge kind of their surroundings. And I think that really makes it,

[B]

I know, more worthwhile. Totally. I want to highlight something that I know that you've done because we've talked about it with your family having a landline. Oh, yeah. I think I spoke about that on the last guest too, but maybe go into that.

[D]

So for Lily's birthday this year, a bunch of her friends, the same group of moms who, you know, took the pledge together, they all started getting landlines for their kids. Like the old school with the toys.

[B]

Old school and even cordless.

[D]

One got a cheeseburger, one got, you know, like the big lips, like the fun landline phones. I got the Leah because she didn't have the nostalgia of it. So she got a cordless phone with an answering machine and we got. It must be like some old lady's old number because it's literally all she gets is phone calls from like doctor's office too. It's like you're missing your appointment, but it's the excitement of running to the phone and picking it up and, you know, but. And that's where it's kind of nice because when her friends do have cell phones, they can call her and talk to her. One of her friends was trying to get her to play something and he was texting her on her landline and his mom called me and she's like, he's trying to call Lily or text Lily. And I'm like, you can't. It's a landline only call her. There's no text going on. So that was kind of funny.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

But, yeah, that's been really fun for her. And I think it's so important because I know for myself, calling and making a reservation can be difficult because it's so easy to do it online. So it's like, a skill I've lost is like, talking on the phone. So for sure, to be able to pick up the phone and call someone and be oh, is so and so home. Those are really big, like, skills, life skills to know, you know? So I think it's. It's kind of nice.

[B]

Absolutely. Because you should bring back a rotary phone.

[D]

I know. Love it.

[B]

Could you imagine? Did you even know how to desk? Because you guys are young, right? I know. It's so funny. So what do you think is the biggest struggle in not getting in to your children for screens and devices as they get a little bit older? Do you. Have you got any pressure from them? Like, do they want phones? Do they ask you for them?

[A]

My kids don't. I think it's been set already.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Clayton is a little bit missing out. There's, like, a group chat. Yeah. So he was like, mom, I want to be on the group chat.

[B]

And I was like, yeah, all right.

[A]

Well, I didn't want him to miss out on certain things, like wearing shorts to school or whatever, and it's a big deal. I said, well, just give them my phone number. Yeah, whatever it is, just give him my phone number. And then I didn't realize it was 16 kids on the chat. And it's like, oh, my gosh. But really, you know what? They FaceTime, and they try and, like, talk to each other when they're playing video games or something, like, so I'm not really getting any calls. I thought it was going to be more aggressive, but it's not. So I think the hardest part for me is knowing when to pull back or say, you can do certain things and you can't do other things, if that makes any sense. But, yeah, I think the biggest struggle is determining, like, when is it okay to say, sure, get on the iPad. We have a family iPad, and you have five minutes to just see if anybody's hanging around and catch up. And at first I was like, you have to do it right when you're sitting right next to me. And, like, don't put the camera towards me. Like, there was all these, like, you know, stipulations, and they're just saying, like, nicknames for each other. And, you know, the spelling bee, they were probably like, you know, you did so good.

[D]

We're so proud of you.

[A]

So it's really cute to hear them speak in their little languages.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

I think it's cool that for both of you guys, like, in different ways, it's like, because a lot of times the conversation is like, it's all or nothing. You give your kid a smartphone with no boundaries and they can download whatever apps they want or nothing at all. And like, there is like a healthy middle ground of, like, it's one of those things of like, you're not going to, like, never give your kid any sort of technology until they leave the house. Right. Like, but. But at the same time, like, it's all about, like, what's developmentally appropriate, which when they get to be fifth grade, sixth grade, like, talking with their friends, like, without mom sitting right next to me, like, that is something calling somebody else. Hey, Mr. So and so. Hey, Mrs. So and so. Can you. Can he come to play? Can I talk to so and so? But it's not to just be like, here's everything that's on the Internet in your pocket right now, you know, so it's like, yeah, and. But I do think a lot of parents feel that thing of like, well, if I'm going to get them a phone, I get them an iPhone 17 and like, here you go. You know? But there is a lot of middle ground where you can say, like, no, no, we're going to build up to you having that freedom just like you would with anything else. Like, you're not going to give your 12 year old the keys to the car, you know, like, or even your 15 year old. Like, there's like a slow process to build.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And like, both of those examples are like, great examples of that. I love that. I'm sorry, go ahead.

[D]

I did also, when my oldest first started riding her bike by herself, I was super nervous because I am very overprotective, which I've learned more since rereading the generation again. But I did get Lily a gizmo watch, which is one of those smart watches that will track her gps. And she can call or text me and my husband. So. So that I feel like, gives me a little bit of like, okay, you can go off and do what you need to do, but at least she can call me in case of an emergency, which I feel like is, she's not holding it. Yes.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

So that.

[B]

That's. And you're letting her explore and, you know, go into the world a little bit, give up that control, which is so hard.

[D]

It's so hard. Yeah.

[B]

That's like the hardest thing is to, like, trust other people. But, like, we have to. Right. In order for them to become healthy adults.

[C]

Which actually, sorry, I'm going to jump off that because one of the other questions I had had was sort of like, shifting away from the phone screen time thing of, like, how do you guys now having kids who are, like, preteens? I don't know if that scares you to say that.

[B]

Right.

[D]

Tween.

[C]

But, like, so, like, in your experience, like, our culture of safety, even, like you said, like, let them ride their bike, like, how do you feel? Like that. Almost like in the book, he does mention, it's like the safetyism came first, so that when the technology came, it made it like, well, if my kid's inside, he's playing video games, he's talking with his friends online, that's safer than him riding his bike to the park. So how do you guys feel, like, your balance of, like, all right, it's good for me to, like, let them out of my sight for a little bit, but also, like, it's hard in the, you know, when you think of, like, the physical safety versus, you know, the, like, we talked about the, you know, the dangers of online. Even if they're sitting in your living

[B]

room right now, they're talking to online. Right. Because that could be the dangerous.

[A]

I think that's more dangerous. I mean, the kids were at the bus stop today. I pulled away and it was like, bye. And then in my head, I'm like, oh, my gosh, is this going to be the last time I see them? No, it's not. What are the statistics? You know, like, you start unraveling. And so I was like, just stop. Nothing's going to happen to them. The bus is going to come in two minutes. It's totally fine. And then I was thinking about my husband, and my husband would say, statistically, no one's gonna come and grab them in the morning when they're at the bus stop. So that's very low, very low chance. So that made me feel better. And then I think about kids online and the predators online and how they just slip into it, and they're very secretive about it. You don't know if anything's going on. And that, to me, is more dangerous than them riding their bike with their friends or riding to their friend's house and riding around the neighborhood. I want that for them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

As I'm progressing as a parent, I'm able to let go a little bit more of that freedom because I know I wouldn't want them home being isolated.

[B]

Totally. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

[C]

And even to go along with that, like, one thing that I think he mentions in the book is this idea of like, you're not just being like, hey, here's a bike, six year old, go see it. You know, it's like you also teach your kid to recognize dangers in the real world. Like when we were young, like, don't talk to strangers or like, not necessarily don't talk to strangers ever. But there is a difference between, like, there's this person. Do you know what time it is? Like, I need to call my mom, but I need to be home by this time.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Versus a person who's like hanging around at the park. He doesn't have kids. He's on his phone, looks like he's taking pictures of us. Like, you know, and if you can teach your kids that, it's like, all right, well, I know my kids are equipped to be like normal, regular adults. And then something's a little bit off maybe, or just something's creepy and I'm not going to approach that person or if they approach me, I'm going to. Versus there's a mom at the park pushing her kid on the swing. I can ask her for help or for whatever, you know. And I think that's the thing too is you'd be like, well, if I let my kid go to the park, what's going to happen? But just like you would teach them anything else. You teach them, like, how do you behave in public? How do you recognize things that are normal, not normal in public.

[D]

I was in the airport a few months ago and I heard a lady say to her son, if you see a woman in a denim jacket, just go up to her and ask her because she's probably a teacher.

[C]

So fun.

[D]

I could think this just like a

[A]

worker who has a uniform denim jacket.

[C]

That's really fun, actually. Or what's the new. What's the. What's like the like rubber looking bag? The bog basing. Yeah, that's right. If you see a woman with a bog bag, you can ask her for that.

[A]

They strong.

[D]

See, because those are heavy. So if you're carrying that around, you got some soap.

[B]

The muscle. So funny.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

So thank you for coming. I mean, this was a great conversation. Right? So in many of our Episodes, we talked about starting small, right? Making changes. Small changes that can grow and become bigger. And I think that you too are really doing that. So thank you. Thank you. But one more question I had really quick while you were talking was you have that agreement, right? Wait till 8th. So when they are in 8th grade, what's the plan? Like, is it like a flip phone? Like, what maybe you can inspire others? What. Have you guys talked about it, do you know?

[D]

I don't know yet. I mean, I guess we'll see when the time comes. I don't want. I mean, I feel like I'm very open with my kids, so I feel like when the time comes, hopefully I'm giving them all of the tools to be safe on their phones.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Today actually, I went to the dermatologist and they were telling me the dermatologist was saying that her little sister has a phone. She's 14 years older than her sister, and she has an app on her sister's phone that monitors everything she does.

[B]

It's like bark or something like vaccine, something like that.

[D]

Quidozo or something like that. I don't know what it was called, but it gives her alerts when there is something dangerous that the sister's looking up, like if it's something that she shouldn't be. And I was like, that's kind of an interesting idea. I don't know if I want to take away their freedoms and be like the snoop inside of their thing, but maybe if I told them when their first year, when they have it, and monitor everything that they're kind of looking at in that way, that might help. And not, you know, yelling at them for looking at stuff, but educating on them, on why this could be potentially dangerous. Maybe I'll do something like that. I don't really know yet. You know, the times. Time will tell.

[A]

Quite a few years, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

You don't know.

[C]

Good point.

[D]

Yeah, I know. Personally, I deleted all of my social medias in January. Good for you. And it's been really good for my mental health. I feel like it's been so stressful, and it's funny thinking about how worried I was about my kids. I feel like sometimes those community posts in Facebook or things, they make you think that there's someone literally on every corner doing something bad, and that's not the case. And so not knowing kind of helps because.

[B]

Because think about back in the. In the 80s, right? Or even before that, before technology even came out. No one knew, you know, like, no one knew anything. It's A little.

[D]

It's a little bit more helpful.

[B]

Yeah. It's not in your face all the time.

[A]

So you don't.

[D]

So I'm not. I'm always, like, super cautious, but, like, not as worried. Like, I'm not, you know, we live in a nice.

[B]

A safe, safe area right now where,

[D]

you know, I'm sure they'll be fine riding their bikes and doing things.

[A]

So we'll see.

[D]

I don't know. What are your thoughts for cell phones in the future?

[A]

I just don't even want to think about it.

[D]

It's like never.

[A]

I know it will come one day and who knows? I don't. How is that even going to be? I don't know. In a few years. I don't know. But I would like to have my flip phone back, actually. I'm like, over all the messages and all the things. Yeah. So, yeah, maybe we'll all get one.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Which quick. The light phone is one to look into the light. It's called the light phone.

[B]

Yeah. Okay.

[C]

It's not a sponsored ad. This is my national opinion. I've been wanting. I might get for years. I've wanted it. The what the nice thing about it, depending on your carrier, you can use it as you could get it. And it's just. That's your phone. Or you can have it with like an iPhone. And sometimes you use the iPhone, sometimes you use that. So it almost is like it's your same number, but it just has. It does. They don't call them apps, they call them tools. So it's just. You have your phone call, you have messages, you have a calculator, you have. They have like a basic maps. They have like, there's literally like 12 tools that they have. That's it. So you can have a phone, but it's not. And it almost is like the Kindle screen, like the. It's not like backlit as much, but that's like, almost like a medium thing of like, oh, I want to get rid of my phone. But, like, I need Spotify or I need my Maps app, like, if we go, you know, things like that. So that's one to look into.

[D]

Yeah, that would be a good transitional phone, probably.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Suggestion.

[C]

So as we wrap up here.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

One thing that we usually do, our three key takeaways, which obviously we didn't have written out because we didn't know where the conversation would go. But the biggest thing that, that, like, for me, like, in talking to both of you is like, what made a huge difference is like the Community of other parents on the same page. And I think even in like looking at like our last episode, which will come out soon, when we talked about like some of the solutions, the four new norms, it really is all. It's like collective action where if you are the only one, it is going to be hard and your kid unfortunately, like in some cases will be left out. Now, that might be for the better, but that doesn't mean it's not going to be hard for you and for them. But when you can have a community, even if it's just a couple other people, you can always be like, well, so and so doesn't have a phone. Why don't you call them? Like, you know, it's like that. It really does. I mean, with a lot of different things, community is such an important thing. But I feel like with this specifically when you're talking about, like, well, what can I do? What can I do? There's probably a lot of people who feel the way that you guys feel and just don't know that the other parents feel the same way.

[B]

Right? Just making me think, like, even like kindergarten orientation, like, or, you know, when they bring them in, like, have a conversation and maybe sign that agreement if what wants to. So, you know, like, okay, this is my group. Like, this is my group of parents who are like minded who agree that we should work together and start it from there. Like every school district can do that, right? You know? Yeah, Start them little.

[C]

Well, thank you guys so much for joining us for your input. It's great to get it and I also appreciate that both of you are not like, like, I have it all figured out.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

There was a lot of like, I don't, I don't knows, but in a real, like, in a good way of like, you know, it's like, this is what we're doing. It's working right now. Who knows in two years, but like.

[B]

But it feels right right now.

[C]

Yeah, exactly. So we appreciate that. Thank you as always to Chris Vaccaro for setting everything up, editing. Peter Burns, Superintendent Dean Middleman, Emily Ike for all your support. We appreciate you guys so much. And for all of our listeners and viewers, thank you for tuning in and have.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

Have a great summer.

[C]

Let me go back. Sorry I stumbled there. Have a great summer.

[B]

Thank you.

[D]

All right.