Episode 334 – Ian Smith / Nish & Amy's voicenotes / Youth

Summary

Podcast Summary: Ed Gamble & Matthew Crosby on Radio X

Episode 334 – Ian Smith / Nish & Amy's voicenotes / Youth
Date: November 16, 2025

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Overview

This episode is brimming with the offbeat, irreverent, and nostalgic humour that fans have come to expect from Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby—aka Crunch & Crumble. The core focus is a (sometimes chaotic) exploration of generational differences, youth culture, and classic radio show antics. Highlights include live interviews with young people about what “the kids” are up to, a guest appearance by comedian Ian Smith, and a delightfully bungled fireworks outing review from Nish Kumar and Amy Annette. Threaded throughout are running gags about ageing, out-of-touch slang, and the duo’s ongoing attempts to stay connected to youth culture, all served in the uniquely self-deprecating tone of Ed and Matthew.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Youth Correspondence: Ed & Matthew Go Searching for "the Kids"

• Ed takes on the mantle of "youth correspondent," interviewing young colleagues from the building in a series of lighthearted but revealing discussions.
• The central question: What are young people up to these days?
  • “Are the kids WhatsApp-ing in the club?” (12:10)
  • Is the word “gig” still used, or is it all “concerts” now?
  • Attempts to keep up with slang (threads, clobber, drip, fit checks) lead to hilarious generational disconnects.

Interviews with Young People

• Hannah (22, 13:21)
  • Out at “concerts” (not “gigs”), particularly into “Hard Life.”
  • Debunks myth: “Are you WhatsApp-ing in the club?” – “No.”
  • “Do they not say ‘gigs’ any more?” (14:32)
• Finn Mendez (19, 16:25)
  • Also goes to “concerts,” most recently Mac DeMarco.
  • Explains in-loud-venue communication: “You just shout in their ear…if not, you type a message and show them your phone. It’s like IRL texting.” (18:43)
  • Emoji talk: Finn’s favourites include the eye-rolling emoji and the cat with heart eyes, suggesting a playful “ironic distance from your own emotions.” (20:50)
  • Generational terminology—Finn doesn’t use “down with the kids” (17:09) and discusses when you stop being a “kid” (“24…then you’re UNK status. Uncle status.” 51:38)
• Millie (20, 47:28)
  • TikTok (“massive”), especially “TikTok Shop.”
  • Communication: prefers iMessage or Snap for big on-screen texts in a club over WhatsApp.
  • Fashion slang fails: Ed says “threads”—Millie only thinks of the Meta app, not clothes. (48:17)

Ed’s earnest but embarrassing attempts to relate—including singing “Ghost Town” by The Specials to a baffled 19-year-old—highlight the chasm between generations and provide recurring cringe-comedy throughout (21:26).

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2. Guest Segment: Ian Smith

Ian Smith (Comedian)

• On to promote his tour “Foot Spa Half Empty,” with dates at Soho Theatre and…Estonia (“classic UK-Estonia tour.” 24:39)
• Jests about the oddity: “Estonia’s not typically on big stand-up tours…my PR wants me to plug Soho but I’m all about Comedy Klubi in Estonia!” (24:49)
  • Running gag: “Comedy Klubi” sounds like something offensive, but is the real name.
  • Wonders if he’ll become an Estonian TV celebrity hosting a custard-based game show.
  • Discusses northern England’s comedy scene (“I sell out in Selby!” 30:06) and invents term “celbebrity.”
• Classic question: “What do you not know what it is?” – Ian chooses “toothpaste.”
  • “Why isn't there toothpaste that does it all? Sensitive, whitening, all-in-one—it’s suspicious!” (35:51)
  • Discussion spirals into bizarre territory (why teeth get ‘dress rehearsals’ as kids, the horror of exposed bones).

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3. Nish & Amy’s Fireworks Review (via Voicenotes)

• Nish Kumar and partner Amy Annette try (and fail) to attend Matthew’s Beckenham Rec fireworks event.
  • End up stuck in traffic, reviewing mostly “the sound of fireworks from the car.” (40:22)
  • Nish’s review: “You can really see the fireworks are going off. Amy’s really stressed about it. … We can hear Crosby. He’s making an announcement about a lost handbag. It’s very, very clear. Five stars.” (44:00)
  • The voice notes, full of comic frustration and pathos, become a highlight of the episode.

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4. Running Gags, Meta Laughs & Memorable Moments

• Self-promotion & Local Celebrity:
  Matthew boasts about being Beckenham’s premier MC for fireworks and Christmas fairs, sending up his own Alan Partridge/Noel Edmonds ambitions (07:11). - “Noel Edmonds had a great career. I’d love that. … I’ve had all of the lows, none of the highs.” – Ed (08:43)
• Mr. Blobby Reboot:
  Banter with producer Vin as the potential “Blobby” sidekick, descending into surreal naked/bowtie imagery (09:05).
• Generational Language Fails:
  Ed: “Do they not say threads? Clobber? … Nice bit of schmutter?” (47:32)
• Convoluted stories & interruptions:
  Multiple tangents, digressions, and hearty self-mockery about their inability to tell a “tight” story (40:00).
• Email Bag Nonsense:
  Listeners write in about everything from Björk dropping an olive (55:16) to the mysteries of recognizing Jeremy Irons.

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5. Musical & Cultural Chat

• Ed and Matthew recommend new music across genres (hardcore, hyperpop, punk).
  • Honningbarna’s album “Soft Spot,” Turnstile’s new single, Nina Jirachi, Danny Brown’s “Stardust,” Remember Sports, and classic Radiohead albums all get discussed (57:00-60:36).

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• "If you could do it during COVID, you can do it from a prison cell!" – Ed (01:22)
• "I found out, you know, sometimes you have a thought and you're like, oh no, I'm crackers." – Ed (01:40)
• "These kids, they don't know they're born, do they?" – Ed (14:15)
• "What do you mean, my threads?" – Millie (48:15)
• “You a Steely Dan fan?” – Ed to Finn, age 19
  “No.” – Finn (17:09)
• “IRL texting: you type a message in your phone and show it to their face. … It’s like ‘in real life’ texting.” – Finn (18:43)
• "My escape. A gorgeous figure. My dad. Absolutely gorgeous figure. Stuart Crosby." – Matthew (07:11)
• "Good morning!" – Ian Smith's “clean” soundbite for the show (29:03)
• "Classic Kumar and Annette." – Matthew, after hearing Nish & Amy’s powerless effort to see fireworks (41:37)
• “Down with the kids? My dad says that.” – Finn (16:45)
• "We all love Fower, Amy." – Matthew, after Amy’s emotional car-park fireworks moment (43:15)
• "Toothpaste. Why is it so confusing? Sensitive, whitening, all-in-one—just put it all in one toothpaste!" – Ian Smith (35:54)
• “You’re lying to yourself, man. You are ultimate UNK.” – Matthew to Ed, when Finn calls Ed “hip” (51:54)

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Important Segments (with Timestamps)

• Pre-show banter & radio pastiche: (00:11 – 03:58)
• Ed’s campaign to be local events MC & Blobby chat: (06:18 – 10:00)
• What are the kids up to? (youth interviews):
  • Hannah (13:21)
  • Finn (16:25, extended at 18:20, 35:36, and 51:18)
  • Millie (47:28)
• Emoji & music talk with Finn: (20:36)
• Ian Smith: Estonia, northern gigs, toothpaste philosophy:
  • Introduction and Estonia segment (24:39 – 32:16)
  • “What is toothpaste?” (35:51)
• Nish & Amy’s Fireworks Voicenotes: (40:22, 41:12, 43:57)
• End-of-show emails, listener stories, music recs: (52:45 – end)
  • Björk and the floor olive (55:16)
  • Album and band recommendations (57:11 – 60:36)

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Tone and Language

The hosts keep the show loose, meta, rambling and joyfully self-effacing, with frequent asides, surreal hypotheticals, inside jokes, and sharp observational wit. While the topics are sprawling—generational divides, local celebrity, young people’s slang, and random listener stories—the relentless comic energy is what binds it all together.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

This episode is a classic Crunch & Crumble romp—equal parts generational investigation, self-parody, and silly fun. If you want to hear middle-aged comedians cringingly (and affectionately) bumble through interviews with Gen Z, listen to an extended digression about the mysterious content of toothpaste, or find out why Nish Kumar reviewed fireworks from a car, Episode 334 has you covered.

Key Takeaway:
Ed & Matthew may never become “cool” or even “youth-adjacent,” but their willingness to poke fun at themselves and their audience—and rope in friends like Ian Smith, Nish Kumar, and actual young people—makes for a comedy podcast that’s both winningly daft and sneakily insightful about ageing, identity, and pop culture.

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Listen if you like: British comedy, generational divides, chaotic radio energy, irreverent pop-culture chat, or just want to feel less alone in calling everything a “gig.”

Transcript

[Ed Gamble]

This is a global player original podcast.

[Radio X Announcer]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby, Radio X.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, hello there, fair traveler. Hello there and welcome to the Podcast Inn. Pull yourself up a pew and grab yourself a hot piping mug of Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby of Mold.

[Ed Gamble]

Ed Gamble of Mold Spiced Crosby.

[Vin]

It's the moon under Gamble now.

[Matthew Crosby]

Hey, there's a gap in the market.

[Ed Gamble]

Absolutely. What a pod that was. Anyway, you're listening to a different one which is of course the Ed Gambler Mac.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's just a radio show just edited down.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, it was a really fun show to do.

[Matthew Crosby]

It is a fun show.

[Ed Gamble]

Really, really good one to do.

[Matthew Crosby]

Pre recorded show. I mean double pre recorded records. Just mainly playing in things that have been recorded before and not playing them out live. I basically. No need for me to be here today.

[Ed Gamble]

We did so much work before the show started to make it easy on you because we didn't even talk about.

[Vin]

No, well don't, don't talk about it. Talk about next week.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, I've been in prison.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, I know we're not allowed to talk about it because the sentencing is next week, so. But after that we'll find out whether or not you're going to be carrying on doing the show. Yes, but.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes, of course, I'd imagine Vin will make me do it from my cell.

[Ed Gamble]

Listen, if you could do it from your.

[Vin]

I'll smuggle you a mic in.

[Ed Gamble]

If you could do it during COVID you can do it from a prison cell.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'll do it through a cup and string.

[Ed Gamble]

Of course. I mean basically is through that at the moment.

[Vin]

They'll probably let you out knowing this.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, let me out by accident, weren't they? They do keep doing that.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Was it like 21 people?

[Matthew Crosby]

They're not helping themselves, are they?

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, it's such a shame, isn't it? Such a shame that a left wing government comes in and they're just total cobbly. By the way, I found out, you know, sometimes you have a thought and you're like, oh no, I'm crackers. And I had one today. Have you seen the footage of the Russian AI robot falling over?

[Matthew Crosby]

No.

[Ed Gamble]

So it's on the, it was on the BBC news website today, which is Thursday and there's they, they brought out this now AI robot and you know, it looks, looks like a kind of like a roboty human being type thing. Walks really unsteadily and then falls off the stage. Very funny clip. And I, I watched it and my immediate thought was, well, of course that's what the Russians Want you to think.

[Matthew Crosby]

You listen to too many.

[Ed Gamble]

Too many podcasts. And I was like, obviously they're releasing that footage to so. So the Western world has a sense of complacency.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

When they, you know, the AI robots are walking among us right now. You could be one. I could be one. That's really going on.

[Matthew Crosby]

You're not Russian, Crucially.

[Ed Gamble]

I don't think they're giving them Russian accents.

[Matthew Crosby]

If you meet a Russian person, beware.

[Ed Gamble]

Sitting on a park bench, reading a newspaper. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Beware, guys. But, yeah, it's nice to know I'm absolutely bonkers.

[Ian Smith]

Still.

[Ed Gamble]

Just horror.

[Matthew Crosby]

Horrible. Yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Really horrible. Really horrible realization.

[Matthew Crosby]

And at your age, there's no way you're pulling that back round. The brain's gone.

[Ed Gamble]

I can't turn it around now. It's not. It's not happening. We've had a. A lovely message in from Mark, who says, dear Ed, Matthew and what's been the box? See what you got by the Boo Radleys. Happy radio, lads.

[Matthew Crosby]

Don't mind if I do.

[Ed Gamble]

Been meaning to send you this. Can't remember why or what it was in relation to, but I'm sure.

[Matthew Crosby]

No need to do that.

[Ed Gamble]

Every. Every message starts like that. But I'm sure you mentioned Ed being a cowboy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Probably. Maybe I've started wearing sort of quite a lot of cowboy clothes. Maybe that was it. I'm in my cowboy era.

[Ed Gamble]

You are in your Cowboy Carter era. Yeah. Well, here's a poster for Dinosaur King. An Ed Gamble lookalike, Alfie, Exotic, who looks a bit like a cowboy. Isn't that just so funny? You missed out the God bless you, Mark, but. Yes, God bless you, Mark. So if you go to Lutterworth, then you can find this guy. Do you think that looks like you?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. I mean, it's a dumb of you, doesn't I? Yeah, yeah. From a distance, it really does. A white guy.

[Ed Gamble]

He's a white man. Yeah, yeah, he's a white man with hair. So there we go. We also had, and this is very apropos to what's going to happen in the show, we had a message from, apparently from a young person telling us what they're up to. This is from Theo. So, Theo, 20. This isn't written like, you know, it's not formatted like a normal email, it's just written like it's a text message. Theo, 20, currently driving from Birmingham to pick up a turbo kit for my box of a Porsche. Should be beating Lambos and Ferraris in a race. Once all fitted, do me a favor, get some Oasis on. Bring it on down. Now, Theo, I've seen through that you are a 53 year old divorced man talking about beating Lambos and asking for Bring it on down.

[Matthew Crosby]

Come on, come on.

[Ed Gamble]

You're fooling no one.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, I guess that just shows that, you know, we can't say what are all young people up to? They've all got different hobbies, they've all got different and different personalities.

[Ed Gamble]

That's what makes it so wonderful. More young people chat, obviously in the show. Lots of people getting in touch about the poo machine. Yeah, loads of people. So what they believe you're thinking of is Cloaca by Wim Delvoy, which was displayed at the Museum of New and Old Art in Hobart, Australia.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, maybe I am thinking of that. But I saw something else as well.

[Ed Gamble]

That pooh was coming out of.

[Matthew Crosby]

That pooh was coming out of. I think it was my own.

[Ed Gamble]

But you shouldn't have got that mirrored toilet.

[Matthew Crosby]

What's he called?

[Ed Gamble]

Wim Delvoy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Wim Delvoy. Here we go.

[Vin]

Some of the emails also mention Paul Foote talking about this on off menu. You might have remembered.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, no, no, because I did see a clip the other day of something else and I don't think it was. I don't think it was this. Yeah, the poo machine. Yeah. Cause Paul did talk about this, but I think there was a different thing I was thinking of. But yeah, I am looking at that. That is one of the poo machines that was in my mind.

[Ed Gamble]

We'll do a couple more of these on the other side, but let's get into the. Let's get into the episode now.

[Radio X Announcer]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Ed Gamble]

Ray D O X. Good morning Beckenham and the wider world. You're listening to Radio X. This is Matthew Crosby, co host of the Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby radio show on Radio X. But you may or may not know that I am also the host of the UK's biggest event, the Beckenham Wreck fireworks display.

[Matthew Crosby]

Do you know that? Do you know nothing about it?

[Ed Gamble]

Listen. Well, listen. This, this, this event attracts thousands of people cumulatively over the course of several years and that is in no small part to my input. SHOUTING Good evening, Beckenham. Maniacally Instagramming while standing next to a red van and reuniting revelers with a lost scarf, handbag or baby. I will also be opening, as I have done in previous years, the Greener and Cleaner Christmas Fair at their hub in the Glade shopping centre, Bromley on November 22, just like Noel promo hanging.

[Matthew Crosby]

Out with Noel Edmonds.

[Ed Gamble]

Come on, do come on down, please. Because last year I cut the ribbon in front of a single figure audience, mainly comprised of my wife and dad. I can't stress enough, that is two separate people.

[Matthew Crosby]

No single figures.

[Ed Gamble]

No, it was single figures. But there were two people.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's a lovely figure. My escape.

[Ed Gamble]

A gorgeous figure. My dad. Absolutely gorgeous figure. Stuart Crosby. Anyway, my work at both the Beck Rec fireworks and the Greener and cleaner Christmas Fair November 22, Grace Shopping Centre, 11am See you there has proved that I'm a dab hand at mike technique, vibe creation, maintenance and no nonsense admin. If you want someone to inform a large group of people that a red Ford is blocking a driveway whilst never once letting the anticipation of the 6pm low noise kids fireworks show diminish, then get in touch.

[Matthew Crosby]

Such a long intro.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, really, really. I've got to put myself out here. I am also a one man expert in crowd control. If you're worried about too many people showing up at your event, book yourself a Crosby. No gig is beneath me. I'll host a harvest festival, a swimming gala, a Bonnie Baby, a Bony baby contest, a Beanie Baby contest, A pagan blood sacrifice or a Funko sized class in a box park. I'll turn on Christmas lights. I'll turn off Christmas lights. I'll post toe wrestling, cock fighting, competitive eating or a Sunday morning breakfast show on Radio X. I am not proud. I'll even don my waterproof pack O Mac to host the Spitting Games. Radio X.

[Radio X Announcer]

This is Radio X. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Matthew Crosby]

How dare you use your introduction to this show.

[Ed Gamble]

What?

[Matthew Crosby]

To promote yourself.

[Ed Gamble]

Listen, this whole thing is a showreel.

[Matthew Crosby]

For me to mould yourself into the new, as I said, Noel Edmonds or Alan Partridge style figure.

[Ed Gamble]

You know what I would love to have? Noel Edmonds career. What a career.

[Matthew Crosby]

He's had a pretty good career.

[Ed Gamble]

He's had a pretty good career.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. You'll need a few more highs, I'd say.

[Ed Gamble]

That's the thing.

[Matthew Crosby]

You're going straight to the lows.

[Ed Gamble]

I've had all of the lows. I've had all the lows on the crunchy copter. I've had none of the soaring highs yet. I've not had a deal or no deal. I've not had a Noel's House party. I've not had a great late great breakfast show or whatever it was called.

[Matthew Crosby]

Who would be your Blobby?

[Ed Gamble]

Who would be my Blobby?

[Vin]

I'm Putting my hand up.

[Matthew Crosby]

I think it needs to be more of a character than just Vin.

[Ed Gamble]

There's nothing more of a. There's no one who's more of a character than Vin.

[Matthew Crosby]

This is my friend Vin, who walks in and smashes everything up. I think it works for Blobby because he's like a weird alien guy.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, I could be a weirdo, I.

[Matthew Crosby]

Think, if you're just a bloke.

[Ed Gamble]

Just a bloke.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's quite aggressive, isn't it?

[Ed Gamble]

More aggressive.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Vin]

I could put a bow tie on.

[Matthew Crosby]

Just you with a bow tie. Butt naked. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Nude, but for a bow tie.

[Vin]

Bow tie and cufflinks.

[Matthew Crosby]

Cufflinks. Sorry, not naked, just cufflinks. How the cufflinks.

[Ed Gamble]

How are you attaching the cufflinks to.

[Vin]

Your body if you've done end of the bow tie?

[Ed Gamble]

Okay, so completely nude, just two dangling silver cufflinks hanging off a bow tie.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's right.

[Ed Gamble]

To sort of distract from the rest.

[Vin]

Of what's going on. Maybe one of those hats with corks on it.

[Ed Gamble]

I think you're covering the wrong bits, mate.

[Vin]

Yeah, yeah, no, but that. But that would be over my feet.

[Matthew Crosby]

What else? A thimble? Are you gonna wear a thimble?

[Vin]

Okay, yeah, if you want. Yeah, yeah, I'm happy to brainstorm it.

[Nish Kumar]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Maybe we shouldn't do it on air, though.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, maybe not.

[Ed Gamble]

I don't know. But yes, I would love Noel Odom's career. And if anybody has got a gala they want me to host, I'm available. My rates are very affordable. I mean, I did the fireworks for a jacket potato, so if you can afford a jacket potato. It was a big jacket potato. I didn't even finish it. Couldn't finish it. It was so big.

[Matthew Crosby]

Couldn't even finish your payment.

[Ed Gamble]

I couldn't even finish my payment. You must have days like that when you. I'm being so much. I can't spend it all. That's how I felt. But in jacket potato toast.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. And you can't save a jacket potato. You can't put a quarter of a jacket potato in your bench. And can you.

[Ed Gamble]

I can't show up and say, pop this in an icer. No, no. I could barely. I mean, I could barely pop it in the microwave. They just don't, you know, they don't keep jacket potatoes. That's what they say. Jacket potatoes for Christmas, not for life.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, luckily, we've got a lot of stuff planned on the show today. I've got in this morning and I'm Basically not needed, Matthew.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, Today is going to be a lot of listening to stuff that's already been recorded. But we also have a fantastic guest on the show.

[Matthew Crosby]

We do. Ian Smith's coming. What a wonderful comedian he is.

[Ed Gamble]

He's brilliant. He's absolutely fantastic. So we'll love chatting to him. Plus, I've been chatting to some very young people as well. After last week's chat about what young people are getting up to, I thought I'd go and meet some young people. I'd use it as an excuse to fraternize with some young people.

[Matthew Crosby]

Do they WhatsApp in the club, for example?

[Ed Gamble]

Do they WhatsApp in the club? Well, we'll find out as the show goes on. Plus, of course, we talked about the fireworks at the top of the show. We've got Nish's fireworks update. Yes, it's finally come through.

[Matthew Crosby]

A little late a week, you'd say.

[Ed Gamble]

But as indeed was Nish.

[Radio X Announcer]

Crunch and crumble. This is Radio X.

[Ed Gamble]

We are, of course, we're the voice of the young on Radio X. We are the. We're the. We're the conduit between the old guard. Your Johnny's, your Chrises.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And the youth of today.

[Matthew Crosby]

I couldn't name any youth.

[Ed Gamble]

I couldn't. Couldn't name a young person. Couldn't think of a young person. How young's Noel? How young's Noel Edmunds? He's quite young, isn't he? Young at heart.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, he's funky.

[Ed Gamble]

He's certainly funky.

[Matthew Crosby]

Boot cut jeans and a jazzy shirt.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, and a lovely beard. But we're not here to talk about Noel Edmonds. We've got plenty of show left for that. We're here to talk about me adopting my new mantle of youth correspondence.

[Matthew Crosby]

Right, yes. Matthew's the youth correspondent for this show.

[Ed Gamble]

Now, I found out from a friend of mine who was also about my age, he'd been to a club and he'd seen kids whatsapping each other. Cause the club was too loud. So I wanted to find out, is this true? Are the kids whatsapping in the club?

[Matthew Crosby]

I did hear some correspondence to suggest that's not true.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, well, let's.

[Matthew Crosby]

Now I'm worried that your friend was. And he was so embarrassing. They were all whatsapping each other, laughing at the old man.

[Ed Gamble]

Look at that sad old.

[Vin]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Was it Alaric?

[Ed Gamble]

It wasn't my friend Alaric. No, not this time. It wasn't my friend Alaric.

[Vin]

It's always Alaric.

[Ed Gamble]

It's normally Alaric Listen, I have got one for him.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's either always Alaric or I always ask if it's Alaric and when you say no, I imagine that it is Alaric.

[Ed Gamble]

Alright, let's just say it was Alaric. It was Alaric. It was my friend Alaric. He was in the club, he saw some people whatsapping. He's got no idea what they were. Whatsapping.

[Matthew Crosby]

They were whatsapping. Look at that sad loner.

[Ed Gamble]

I've heard his name is Alaric.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Who's called Alaric?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Anyway, I went and spoke to some real young people. Are we gonna listen to my chat with Hannah first of all?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. Should we hear it? Who's Hannah? How did you find these young people?

[Vin]

These are all people that were young people that work in this office.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay.

[Ed Gamble]

So they work in this building.

[Matthew Crosby]

They were sort of. They had to do these very much. Yeah, Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I think it was Hannah's. Was it Hannah's second day at work?

[Vin]

I think so.

[Ed Gamble]

She was really press gang doing this here. What's your name?

[Hannah]

I'm Hannah.

[Ed Gamble]

Hannah. How old of a person are you?

[Hannah]

22.

[Ed Gamble]

Hannah, first of all, what are the kids up to?

[Hannah]

Oh, that's quite a question. What are we up to? Concerts. Lovely concert.

[Ed Gamble]

What's the last concert you went to?

[Hannah]

Hard Life.

[Ed Gamble]

Hard fi. Hard fi. No, was it, Was it the Radio X Tennis? Hard Fi, Drake, Bug Blossom? Sorry, I don't know. Hard Life. What kind of music do they play?

[Hannah]

Like electro, kind of indie. I don't really know.

[Ed Gamble]

Sounds good. Sounds good. By the way, are you whatsapping in the club? No, you're never in the club whatsapping your friends because the music is too loud.

[Hannah]

No.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, there we go. I mean look, that's gotta be. I'd say definitive, but I can see we've got about eight more of these in hard. Does anything sum you up more or radioacts more than Hannah saying hard life and you go hard fi. It must be hard fi. Surely you mean hard fi usually means hard fi.

[Ed Gamble]

These kids, they don't know they're born, do they? Also, I got confused.

[Matthew Crosby]

We've gotta do more of a wide ranging survey here because she's 22.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes.

[Matthew Crosby]

You said what are the kids? And she said concerts.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, the kids go to concerts.

[Matthew Crosby]

Like a 70 year old woman would.

[Ed Gamble]

Say, well, this is the.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, are they not saying gigs anymore?

[Ed Gamble]

I don't think. I think gigs is our generation.

[Matthew Crosby]

Is it?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

So they just, they've gone all the way back to concerts.

[Ed Gamble]

They're going to see in the Royal Philharmonic.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Nish Kumar]

Yeah. They're gonna.

[Matthew Crosby]

They're going to tell me the truth. Was Hannah a tradwife?

[Ed Gamble]

She was wearing an apron.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Should I have been worried about that?

[Radio X Announcer]

Radio X, Matthew Crosby and Edward.

[Matthew Crosby]

Matthew, of course, is our youth correspondent for Radio X got very shaken last week when we were talking about what the kids are up to. And you've obviously decided to make it your life's mission to find out what the kids are up to.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, I think I relate to kids more than I relate to people my age. I really feel like I.

[Matthew Crosby]

You honestly relate to people 20 years older than you.

[Ed Gamble]

That's probably true. But listen, I don't want that to always be the case. I want to be able to, you.

[Matthew Crosby]

Know, it's too late.

[Ed Gamble]

I want to turn up the top end, but also turn up the bottom end as. Which is not an expression I use in front of the kids because they get scared and run away. Can I turn up the bottom end with you guys? But we've been checked. We've already the revelation that they're not using the phrase gigs anymore.

[Matthew Crosby]

Young people are gigs and they're not what's happening in the club, they're not.

[Ed Gamble]

Whatsapping in the club and they're saying concerts. I then spoke to Finn. We had to go all the way up to the.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, Finn. How old's Finn? Because the names are really coming through now.

[Vin]

Well, he'll tell you.

[Matthew Crosby]

You know all those names back in the day where they're like, this name's popular now.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Really? They're adults now.

[Ed Gamble]

I know Finns. Finns are adults now. But we've got.

[Matthew Crosby]

I know I'm in my 30s.

[Ed Gamble]

You'd be about. For how long?

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm in my 30s. Yeah, but you, Come on, look at science. I'm in my 30s.

[Ed Gamble]

You are in your 30s, but you're knocking on 40s door.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm not knocking on 40s door or.

[Ed Gamble]

Listen, I don't wanna upset you.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm in my.

[Ed Gamble]

He's in his 30s. Look, Ed Gamble. Ed Gamble is in his 30s. But Finn, I can tell you now, not in his 30s. No, we spoke to Finn and here is my chat with him. Okay, what's your name?

[Finn Mendez]

Finn Mendez.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay, Finn Mendez. And where can people find you on. On Instagram? On Snapchat? Where can people find you?

[Finn Mendez]

I'm on Instagram.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, and is it at Fin. Mendez.

[Finn Mendez]

It's Finn. Underscore. Mendez.

[Ed Gamble]

You couldn't get Finn Mendez.

[Ian Smith]

Oh, I'm.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm Matthew Crosby, one. So frustrating. And how old are you, Finn?

[Finn Mendez]

19 years old. One of the kids. Down with the kids, maybe.

[Ed Gamble]

Do people still say down with the kids?

[Finn Mendez]

My dad does. My dad does.

[Ed Gamble]

It's not what I wanted to hear. So, Finn, you're 19 years old. What are the kids up to?

[Finn Mendez]

Concerts. Went to a concert yesterday, actually.

[Ed Gamble]

Who'd you go and see?

[Finn Mendez]

Mac demarco.

[Ed Gamble]

You know what? I love Mac demarco. I absolutely adore Mac demarco. He's got a. So, I mean, he's got. I'm a big fan of Steely Dan. He's got a real Steely Dan sensibility. You a Steely Dan fan?

[Matthew Crosby]

No.

[Ed Gamble]

He should be if he likes Mac DeMarco.

[Matthew Crosby]

Concerts.

[Ed Gamble]

Concerts again, though. This is the big revelation.

[Matthew Crosby]

This is what I'm gonna have to start doing because I'm still in my 30s, is start calling them. I do call them concerts, but sort of semi ironically.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you, at the start of one of your stand up shows, welcome to my concert.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, I do. I refer to my stand up gigs as my concert.

[Ed Gamble]

There you go. Yeah, you're down with the kids. Although obviously not the expression down with the kids anymore. We're learning a lot here. We're not using the expression down with the kids. We are still listening to Mac DeMarco, which I already do. And we're. And we're calling them concerts.

[Matthew Crosby]

Finn Mendez. What a name. I mean, if you. If we came in on a Sunday morning and Vin went, we're gonna have to play this Track. It's got 23 billion views on TikTok. It's by an artist called Finn Menendez who wouldn't bat an eyelid.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Don't forget Jed Mendes, of course, runs the fireworks, the Beckenham Fireworks, and is very close to my wife, Radio X.

[Radio X Announcer]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Matthew Crosby]

We were chatting to Finn. I think we've got more from Finn now, haven't we, Matthew?

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, we're going to hear a little bit more from Finn.

[Vin]

So he was talking about he went to see Mac DeMarco in concert and.

[Matthew Crosby]

Matthew was very excited because I didn't know who Matt DeMarco was because he didn't know who hard life were before you thought they were hard fi.

[Vin]

But yeah, this is. So this is more about the gig that he went to.

[Ed Gamble]

So you're at a Mac DeMarco gig. It's quite loud. The music is pretty loud. Are you whatsapping your friends because the music is so loud? Like the friends who you've gone along to the Gig with. Are you whatsapping them?

[Finn Mendez]

Never. Never. You just shout. You just shout in their ear. And maybe if they don't get it, then maybe you pull up a phone. If it's something important, you maybe pull up a phone and you type it in and you let them read the text.

[Ed Gamble]

What about if you're in the club?

[Finn Mendez]

The same thing. Really Same thing. You can go up to a quiet corner, I guess, but it's just. You get. Pull up on your phone, a message. You type the message in and you show them your phone screen. They read the message. It's not like you're sending it to them, but you just. So you hold the phone up to them and they read the message on your screen. And then you give the phone to them and they type in their message. They hold it up to your face, you read it. It's like IRL texting without hitting the sense.

[Ed Gamble]

What's hiral texting in real life?

[Finn Mendez]

Texting.

[Ed Gamble]

IRL text. I think you said eye roll texting. I was like, you know that little emoji with the eyes rolling.

[Finn Mendez]

Oh, eyes rolling emoji.

[Matthew Crosby]

You are so embarrassed.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, me too, man. It's great. Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

IRL texting is. That's our generation.

[Ed Gamble]

I know, but he said it so quickly. I thought he said I roll texting. But you're closer to Finn's age than.

[Matthew Crosby]

I am in my 30s.

[Ed Gamble]

You're in your 30s?

[Matthew Crosby]

Can I just say, Shouting in people's ears at gigs. This is why this generation is doomed.

[Ed Gamble]

It's rude.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's rude to do. And actually, that's not a generational thing. A lot of people do that. I was at a gig last week. Wanted to see the Mighty Conjurer at the Underworld in Camden petition. Two girls came and stood in front of me and just started having a conversation.

[Vin]

So annoying.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Matthew Crosby]

And I've now got. I've done it before at gigs. I did it at the Darkness a couple of years ago. Turned around and told people to be quiet if they wanted to have a conversation. Go to the corner of the room, listen.

[Ed Gamble]

We, our generation, what we do. Small dry wipe board and some pens, and we write messages to each other that way because, you know, because we're analog. That's what we do. But there's no excuse for screaming and shouting.

[Matthew Crosby]

You know what we do in our generation. Or this might just be me.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

I go to the gig alone. I stand near the back. I leave before the last song.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, absolutely. You cried during the first song. You cried during the last song. And you cry on the bus home.

[Matthew Crosby]

Of course.

[Vin]

So that was Finn talking about actually the eye roll emoji. There's more emoji chat here from Finn.

[Finn Mendez]

Oh, great emojis.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I use the. The little smiling face with all the hearts around it.

[Finn Mendez]

Lot of fun.

[Ed Gamble]

Whoa.

[Finn Mendez]

I prefer the cat with the heart eyes.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you know what I think that suggests? An ironic distance from your own emotions.

[Finn Mendez]

Oh, that's quite deep. Never thought about it like that. But my favorite emoji. Either the eye rolling emoji or I like the little. The purple man in a dancing suit.

[Ed Gamble]

The sort of Saturday Night Fever type guy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

What do you think about the. The little man who's dressed up like a sort of scar dude who's jumping up.

[Finn Mendez]

I haven't seen that one.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, you've got to see him. He said he looks like the little logo from the Two Tone. Do you know Two Tone? Like the Specials and Madness? Those bands were Two Tone bands. Do you know those bands?

[Finn Mendez]

No. No, I don't.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh my God. You should listen to the Specials. I think you'd really enjoy them.

[Finn Mendez]

I'm terrible with names. I'm better with. If you play me a song, I'll be like, oh, yeah, I know that song.

[Ed Gamble]

They had a song called Ghost Town and it goes. This town. Ah, it's kind of like a ghost town.

[Finn Mendez]

I think if I heard it from a better voice, I might. I might recognize it.

[Ed Gamble]

Matthew, do you know what?

[Matthew Crosby]

My skin is crawling.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, that is genuinely uncomfortable.

[Matthew Crosby]

So cringyou just start talking and my brain is going, stop talking. Oh, the two. The Two Tone bands. You know, the Specials. It's unbelievable.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

And that was not. You'd not put that on on. No, that was not. Like, I'm gonna sound old now.

[Ed Gamble]

No, that was just. That's the kind of conversations I tried with you and you saved it. You've been boring again. But I just.

[Matthew Crosby]

I. I can't believe 19 you're going, oh, they've got a song called Ghost Town. It goes like this. It goes like this.

[Ed Gamble]

It goes like this. It goes like this. I sang Ghost town to a 19.

[Matthew Crosby]

Year old Saturday Night Fever guys. Like. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I thought I'd got away with it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh my God, that was.

[Vin]

Well, the good thing is there's more of these.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, there's plenty more with that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Are they as cringe as that one?

[Vin]

Oh, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, fantastic.

[Radio X Announcer]

The old man and the big baby.

[Ed Gamble]

Radio X.

[Matthew Crosby]

Bit of pain under the covers, actually. Let me have a look under that. Oh, no, that Toenail. It's Ingrown.

[Ed Gamble]

It, lads.

[Matthew Crosby]

I love this.

[Ed Gamble]

I bet you.

[Matthew Crosby]

Sorry. Listen to that face.

[Ed Gamble]

All right. I like that. I like the bass. And this is a band called Ingrown.

[Matthew Crosby]

Is it Ingrown? Yeah. And that song's called Ingrown.

[Ed Gamble]

You know that's Bullet.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, sorry. Bullet.

[Ed Gamble]

That's Bullet. Okay. See, well, I was going to say, if you've got a.

[Matthew Crosby]

We tried to get ingrown, but Vin couldn't find it. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Is it too.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, it's difficult to Google.

[Ed Gamble]

It's really, really fast. You've been Googling that already, haven't you?

[Radio X Announcer]

Ed Gamble and Mother Matthew.

[Matthew Crosby]

Radio X single guest today. The. The one scoop for Daddy.

[Ed Gamble]

The one scoop for Daddy. Yes.

[Matthew Crosby]

The individual, the wonderful, the brilliant, the hilarious. It's Ian Smith.

[Ian Smith]

Hello. One scoop. Here I am.

[Ed Gamble]

Are you comfortable being a single scoop?

[Ian Smith]

Well, I guess I'd sort of prefer a situation where it's one person, but you're getting multiple scoops. Let you sort of say to them, it's only me eating this.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ian Smith]

Let's mix it up, please.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay. So you're gonna give us multiple scoops? Yeah, yeah.

[Ian Smith]

I'll do different voices.

[Ed Gamble]

Wow.

[Ian Smith]

Have you seen Norbert with Eddie Murphy?

[Nish Kumar]

Of course.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

I'm gonna be. It's actually gonna be pretty offensive.

[Ed Gamble]

I was gonna say, why are you wearing a fat suit? That's already a problem. So, Ian, it's great to have you on the show. You've got a new tour across the UK in February and March, but you're also at the Soho Theatre on the 25th to the 29th of November with your show Foot Spa Half Empty.

[Ian Smith]

Yes. And let's Please not forget the 21st of January, where I'm doing a gig in Estonia for some reason.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, yes, I've seen that on your list of tour dates. It's a UK tour.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

And one gig in Estonia.

[Ian Smith]

It's a UK Estonia tour.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes. Ireland. Is Ireland making it in there, there?

[Ian Smith]

No, no, it's just Estonia. UK Estonia. It's a classic UK Estonia tour.

[Matthew Crosby]

What's happened there? Why is that happening?

[Ian Smith]

I guess a lot of comedians will ignore Estonia and I've seen a market there and my PR will say stuff like, plug the Soho dates and plug the UK dates. And I'm really not interested in talking about them.

[Ed Gamble]

Sorry to have mentioned them. Really?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

You're a sort of leave no Estonia unturned. That's very much your tour, Monte.

[Matthew Crosby]

This guy is top of the tree when it comes to rad. Are you kidding me with this? He's not planned that.

[Ed Gamble]

What's the venue in Estonia you're gonna be performing in? Do you know what it's. Do you know what it's called?

[Ian Smith]

It's a fantastic question.

[Ed Gamble]

Thank you very much. I loved asking it.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

But let's not trouble ourselves with an answer. It was such a good question. Let's not sully it with an answer.

[Ian Smith]

I think. I can't. I don't know if this is the people who are bringing me out there or the name of the venue and it isn't gonna sound right, but comedy. Clooby. Comedicluby.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, you've made that up, haven't you?

[Ian Smith]

It sounds like someone being offensive.

[Ed Gamble]

That is gonna be offensive.

[Ian Smith]

Yes. This is what they call it, but that's how it's. A, O, M, E, E, D, I. I've lost track now.

[Ed Gamble]

All of those letters rearrange you a bit. So iansmithcomedian.co.uk is where you can go and get those tickets, including the tickets to comedy.

[Matthew Crosby]

If we sell one ticket to your Estonian show because of this, I will be over the moon. So if you're listening and you happen to be in Estonia, what date are you doing? Estonia.

[Ian Smith]

21St of January.

[Matthew Crosby]

21St of January? Yeah. If you want to go and see Ian Smith in Estonia, if you are in Tallinn, please let him know and let us know that it's because of this.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, yeah. And the Soho theater dates, which is at the end of the month, they're selling quite well. So if you're thinking, yeah, I'm in London, but I'd also fancy a holiday. Yes. To Estonia.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

In January, when it's going to be lovely. It's going to be covered in snow.

[Matthew Crosby]

Comedic looby.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah. Get to the comedic looby.

[Vin]

I think it's a Wednesday the 21st, I think.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Midweek. Estonia.

[Ed Gamble]

Big Wednesday for in Estonia. That's basically their Saturday night.

[Ian Smith]

That's what I've been told.

[Ed Gamble]

Wednesday night in Estonia. Are you going to alter the material at all? Is there any. Are you gonna sort of go there a couple of days early, get a bit of local going on?

[Ian Smith]

I'm going a day early.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. That's enough.

[Ian Smith]

So I reckon I'll have one. I'll get one joke out of that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, You've got to. Yeah, yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Even if it's just about snow. Cold here. I might say cold here.

[Ed Gamble]

That's a good one.

[Matthew Crosby]

I just did a tour show in Lisbon.

[Ian Smith]

Oh, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

And I was there the day before and I got loads of great stuff out of it. Mainly complaining about the infrastructure of Lisbon Airport and the fact that the attitude to service seems to be relax.

[Ed Gamble]

What's the weather like in. In Lisbon at the moment?

[Matthew Crosby]

It sounds like a joke.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I was gonna say because you could say mild here.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

My cold stuff was nice, actually. It was mild.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

And pastel Donata did a bit of stuff on that.

[Ed Gamble]

Lovely, lovely. What's Estonia famous for? What would be their snack of snack of choice?

[Ian Smith]

It's another good question. Well, I guess I'll fill. I'll fill all the gaps with you making.

[Ed Gamble]

Can I just say, you've got a gorgeous singing voice. Yeah. Do you ever end the show on a song? Because you really should.

[Ian Smith]

I used to. I went through a phase. This is early Edinburgh Fringe, when I was doing like split hours. I lived with a few comedians, but like Matthew Height and if you know Matthew heightened.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, of course.

[Ian Smith]

Spent a lot of time with him. And I got up really early and I was full of beans. And I'd sing Good Morning and I think it would wake people up. And looking back, it's annoying. But I'd like knock on Matthew Hyten's door and go, morning and do that.

[Matthew Crosby]

So only looking back on it, you think that's annoying?

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

You didn't realize that at the time? You didn't realize that at the time that that might be annoying?

[Ian Smith]

No. Well, I was. I guess my thought process was, it's the morning and I'm full of beans.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Do you know what? Can we clip up that morning and play that occasionally we'll have a. You know, we're not really that zoo on this show, but occasionally we'll play a little sound bite and I think a lovely Ian Smith. Morning. Can you give us a clean one just now?

[Ian Smith]

Oh, yeah. Do you want a good in it or just a morning stick?

[Ed Gamble]

A good in it. Why not?

[Ian Smith]

Okay. Good morning.

[Ed Gamble]

Gorgeous set of pieces.

[Matthew Crosby]

Perfect. That's gonna be great. That's gonna start every show from now on.

[Ed Gamble]

Iansmithcomedian.co.uk if you want to get tickets to see Ian Foot Spa Half Empty is the title of the show.

[Radio X Announcer]

Scoop Daddy and Goujon Mustard Radio X.

[Ed Gamble]

We were talking about your tour date in Estonia, but during that song you were telling us that you said you've.

[Matthew Crosby]

Got some other mad ones.

[Ed Gamble]

You were doing mad tour. Where else are you doing?

[Ian Smith]

I'm just doing these places that a lot of comedians neglect. I'm doing Barton Upon Humber, the Estonia of the uk. You can't make places up Barton Upon Humber. I'm also doing Hull, which is directly across the bridge from Barton Upon Humber double.

[Matthew Crosby]

On the other side of the Humber bridge.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, I'm doing both sides of the Humber.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm doing a Humber double, but that's more your neck of the woods. Right. You must be a bit of a hometown hero around Barton and Pon, Humber and Hull, except. Etc.

[Ian Smith]

I sell disproportionately well up north. The. The place where you can't get tickets. Do you know Selby? You ever been to Selby?

[Matthew Crosby]

I've never been to Selby.

[Ed Gamble]

Never gigged in Selby. No.

[Ian Smith]

That I sell out 150 seater in Selby. I'm telling like within two weeks of it going on sale.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

That is not replicated on the rest of the tour. Selby. Love me.

[Ed Gamble]

Have you thought about moving to Selby and just being the local Selby celebrity? You know, you could wander around the street, you could be. You could be the celbebrity.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Have you thought about being the cel bebrity?

[Ian Smith]

Not until now. But it does have a lovely ring to it, doesn't it?

[Ed Gamble]

The celbebrity.

[Matthew Crosby]

And I feel like that's what you're gonna do with Estonia though. I think that's the plan, isn't it? What if you go over there and it's such a success, they're like, we want you to come and host our top entertainment format, like. And it's you like swimming around in a load of custard or something. I don't know what they do there.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, really?

[Matthew Crosby]

Really? Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

I was gonna say Estonia's got talent. You've gone straight to custard. What do you think their main show is? Yeah, they've got a big vat of custard.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Funny de custard. Funny de custard. Of course you're there in a big round.

[Ian Smith]

I. Come on, I'm presenting it. But am I still in the custard?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ian Smith]

So I'm in the custard.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Welcome.

[Matthew Crosby]

And then it goes. It makes that look noise.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. And then the custard all wobbles.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah. Someone's got a guitar. They're in the custard with me.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ian Smith]

But what do you reckon then?

[Ed Gamble]

Do you know what?

[Ian Smith]

Show us.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you know what I think would be a good.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, I think we've described the show.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, I've got it. Right, so you've got. You've got a big vat of custard. You're no longer in it, you're next to the vat of custard. Right. They. It's, it's been left out for a while. Right. You've got to travel across walking on custard, travel across the skin of the custard without breaking it. It's about being delicate on your toes.

[Matthew Crosby]

And that's what celebrity guest on every week is.

[Ed Gamble]

It's in the cust with you.

[Ian Smith]

Oh, no, I would, I mean, I'd watch that.

[Ed Gamble]

Would you host it though? That's the big question.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah. I mean, definitely in the uk. I'd host it, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's not going to happen in the uk.

[Ian Smith]

Okay. Well, yeah, I'd host it in Estonia. Yeah. Actually I would if my agent emailed me and said, do you want to host a walking over custard based show in Estonia? I'm saying yes, because I'm like, well, I'm going to get a full hour of comedy out of that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ian Smith]

I'm praying for stuff like that to happen to me.

[Matthew Crosby]

I reckon you could do a 300 seater in set.

[Ian Smith]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'll move up. I have to put a matinee on.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, you've got the, you've got the next year plans now. Once the tour's over, you go back to Estonia, you pitch the show and then you start looking on Zoopla Fair houses in Selby. Happy to, you know, happy to be your life coach, Ian. Really happy to be your life coach. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby, Radio X Hat hat. Ian Smith. He's playing Estonia, guys. So if you're in Estonia on the 21st of January, get yourself along to iansmithcomedian.com this is what happens when comedians.

[Matthew Crosby]

Don'T bring PRs with them.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, I'm also playing London.

[Ed Gamble]

London doesn't say that here. Ian Smith, comedian. The Estonian comedian Ian Smith performing in estonia.

[Matthew Crosby]

Comedy Klubi. 21st of January, the Klooby.

[Ed Gamble]

We should talk about your fantastic podcast that you do with a dear friend of the show, Amy Gled. Yes, it's called Northern News. For people who've not heard Northern News. Tell us what it's all about.

[Ian Smith]

Well, we're two Northerners and we've been living in London for a while now. So we're trying to keep in touch with the North. We go through newspapers, all the online stories and we try and find the sort of weird stuff that's happening up north. There was a man who was really upset because people keep shouting porridge for his letterbox. He doesn't know why they're doing it, but he'll get like a knock on the door and then someone opens it up. Porridge. And he's going, what are you doing this for? And he said, sometimes it's. Sometimes it's just porridge, sometimes it's, come and get your porridge. One time it was like whispered, oh, that's creepy.

[Ed Gamble]

Porridge time, Papa bear. Oh, my God.

[Matthew Crosby]

And now he's got on the news about it.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

So now it must be happening, like 50 more times.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah. And in the story where he basically posted a fair Facebook post, he's going like, this is what's happening to me. And he's basically going, I live on 15. And everyone's got. All right, well, you think that's gonna happen unless now, do you?

[Matthew Crosby]

That's such a funny prank to play on someone, man.

[Ed Gamble]

So funny. Yeah. I want to know who the first person was. It was like, let's just. Because he presumably was picked completely at random, he's got no connection. He hasn't done. He hasn't been to prison or anything like that. Or he's not a big fan of Goldilocks.

[Ian Smith]

He's not a particular fan of porridge.

[Matthew Crosby]

And he's not accidentally signed up to a porridge delivery service. Us?

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, I don't think so. Yeah. It could be something like that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Poor delivery. Porridge delivery man, he's like, why is he getting so angry? I'm just telling him his porridge is here. Come and get porridge. Pop up like that.

[Ian Smith]

Wonky veg ones.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, the odd box.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, yeah. That's how they deliver it as well.

[Matthew Crosby]

Do people get those anymore.

[Ed Gamble]

Wonky veg? No, we. I think we all got them during lockdown and then we stopped.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's nice to get a box of vegetables you can just leave to rot.

[Ed Gamble]

You did have to throw away a rotting cardboard box every week and just going, I'm just. I've just got so fennel. Just really don't need it anymore. Thank you, Oddbox, though. We've got to ask you one of the biggest questions in radio, Ian, while you're here, Ian Smith. What do you not know what it is?

[Ian Smith]

What do I not know what it is?

[Ed Gamble]

We'll give you a little bit of thinking time while we explain the question. It's a question we ask lots. We ask our listeners and we ask our guests. This is something that you might have seen many, many times, but you're not sure. The more you think about it, it the less you know about it. Like, what is a mirror? What is paint?

[Ian Smith]

Oh, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

What is radio? What are these things, Ian Smith?

[Matthew Crosby]

What is they and how does they. Is they working?

[Ed Gamble]

Exactly?

[Ian Smith]

I'll tell you off the top of my head, I'm thinking toothpaste.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, lovely.

[Ian Smith]

And I'll tell you why. I sort of broadly, at first, you're like, all right, I know what toothpaste is. It's a sort of. No, because what's in it? Like, I get the. So there'll be stuff in it that helps you, like fluoride or iron. It helps clean your teeth.

[Matthew Crosby]

You'd hope there's stuff in it that helps clean your teeth. Right, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Like minimized. Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

So you're thinking, I get this, I understand this. But then another toothpaste will come and be like, oh, this is for sensitive teeth. All right, well, what have you put in that one that makes that good for sensitive teeth?

[Ed Gamble]

Put it in all of them.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Why isn't there one toothpaste that just does it all?

[Ian Smith]

Yeah. Cause you do get that. You get some. That. Where they're like, oh, four in one toothpaste. And then it'd be four in one with extra whitening.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Shove it all in one toothpaste.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ian Smith]

There shouldn't be different toothpaste.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, I completely agree with you. And also, we're told brushing, you gotta brush. Right. So. But then why is the toothpaste important, surely? Why can't you put the toothpaste on and just leave it there? Is that good?

[Ed Gamble]

Why also, why is it the only everything else, every other part of your body? Soap. Right. Basically. So it's the only other body part that's got, like a special thing.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's the only exposed bones.

[Ed Gamble]

I guess it's the only expo. Well, yeah, that's.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's awful. When you think about your teeth or your bones poking out your head, and.

[Ian Smith]

They'Re the only body part you get a practice go at.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, that's very true.

[Ian Smith]

You get some teeth and then just. You, like, got the hang of these. You're like, get rid of those. Here's your proper ones, they're all coming out.

[Matthew Crosby]

For some fruit, you get a dress rehearsal.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Ian Smith]

Imagine that with, like, if you had the same arm you had as a baby until you were 14, and then.

[Ed Gamble]

It just drops off like a lizard's.

[Ian Smith]

Tail, and then a new one comes.

[Matthew Crosby]

Comes through, or it's wobbly for ages and you have to tie a piece of string on the door.

[Ed Gamble]

Do what, though? If. If I did have. If I did have, like, if I did have little baby arms.

[Matthew Crosby]

You do.

[Ed Gamble]

Which I do. Yeah. And. But I knew they were going to fall off. Loads of practice tats.

[Nish Kumar]

Right.

[Ed Gamble]

Tats you're not. Tats you're not sure about. You know, I got a bunch of tats when I was seven.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Doesn't matter. The arms falling off.

[Matthew Crosby]

But you're imagining Matthew as having like an adult trunk, like a body.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

And then tiny little baby arms just.

[Ed Gamble]

Dangling off the air like a T Rex.

[Ian Smith]

Cause sometimes you. Sometimes you keep a baby tooth for ages.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, still got one.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, Right.

[Nish Kumar]

Right there.

[Ed Gamble]

Ah, still got it.

[Matthew Crosby]

I've still got my wisdom Willie.

[Ed Gamble]

Ian Smith, of course, Foot spa, half empty. Iansmithcomedian.co.uk he's going to some places, but crucially, hard upon Humber and Estonia. Yeah, those are the biggies.

[Ian Smith]

And Selby, if you.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, listen, Selby sold out. We know that you're going to move to a bigger venue in Selby.

[Matthew Crosby]

Selby Stone into Bybee Radio X Ed.

[Radio X Announcer]

Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Matthew Crosby]

We've got more of your interviews with young people which have been very enlightening for all of us here.

[Ed Gamble]

I think every day's a school day.

[Matthew Crosby]

Even me and Vin here in our 30s. But we'll be hearing from an old person now.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, one of our old. One of our old fogy mates.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ed Gamble]

So obviously last week I was hosting the fireworks in Beckenham Wreck. Very, very good job I did too. I'm available for. For higher. I mean higher. Anyway, give me a cash.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'll just go and do it a bigger jacket potato.

[Ed Gamble]

I'll do it for a bigger jacket potato.

[Matthew Crosby]

You want to get your agent involved, mate.

[Vin]

Matthew just means that he'll say hiya.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, I'll say hiya for a jacket potato with some salad on the side. I invited Nish Kumar along. Well, in fact, Nish and Amy messaged me. Nish and his partner, the wonderful Amy Annette, who's been on the show, friend of the show, friend of the show, messaged me just before it was about to start and said, oh, can we get in? We didn't realise it would be sold out.

[Matthew Crosby]

Of course it's sold out.

[Ed Gamble]

It's fireworks.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's not sold out. I've seen the pictures. It was sold fine. Why don't they put eight tickets on sale? They could probably make a bit more money.

[Ed Gamble]

It was sold out. That photo was taken.

[Matthew Crosby]

Look like post apocalypse wasteland.

[Ed Gamble]

That photo was taken quite early in the evening before. Anyway, So I said, yeah, of course.

[Vin]

I guess they sell all the tickets. Not everyone turns up. You've got no control over that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, 98% of people didn't show up.

[Ed Gamble]

Anyway, there was room for Amy and Nish. I invited them in. I said, go to Village Way speak today.

[Matthew Crosby]

We don't need those details with you. You'd be sur to learn how to edit your stories.

[Ed Gamble]

You'll be surprised because Nish said when we eventually met and they said, oh, I've recorded all of my thoughts about the fireworks and I've got them, I've got them on my voice notes and I'll send them through to you. He forgot to send them through last week but he sent them through this week and this is the first of his voice notes.

[Nish Kumar]

Okay. It's a bad start. We think we got the wrong time. We thought it started at 7:30.30. We've arrived late so the review is good. We can really see the fireworks are going off. That's Amy's really stressed about it. That's the sat nav. Oh, there's a lot of fireworks and we're still in the car sort of driving near it. It's not a great start to the review. Really spectacular sounds. You can't really see anything at the moment. We're struggling to find a park. Sounds really, really wonderful. Really good actually. We're still in the car but boy, things have taken a turn for the spectacular. Can only imagine the kind of great stuff Matthew's saying while these fireworks go off. Whoa, that was a big one. That's probably the sort of thing he's saying.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh God.

[Nish Kumar]

We can sort of hear music in the distance. I think it's coming from the fireworks pie. We're in some quite bad traffic. We're sort of in a kind of Stonehenge situation here where people are, I think, slowing down to observe some of the fireworks. I bet Matthew's saying some great stuff.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, I mean that being friends with Nish and Amy for many, many years. That is vintage Kumar and Annette.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

But they had been told the wrong time.

[Ed Gamble]

They had been in. They'd been misinformed. Yeah, I'd been given the. The wrong information. Early doors I'd met, I'd sent that on to Amy when I got right information I'd completely forgotten they were coming to.

[Vin]

The times changed on the night.

[Ed Gamble]

Times changed on the night. Yeah. And so. So yeah, they did have the wrong information. But I would say if you are. If you think the Fireworks started at 7:30 and you're in the car at 7:20.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

You're already running. That's classic Kumar.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, that is, yeah. Yeah. Do you say anything during the fireworks?

[Ed Gamble]

No. This is another thing as well. I'm not doing a running commentary over the fireworks. The fireworks are the show. I just have to go. Guys, don't forget. Keep looking up into the sky. That's where it's all happening.

[Matthew Crosby]

You should do audio description for visually impaired people. That would be perfect.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you know what? That's a very good idea.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I'll suggest that to Jed Mendes.

[Vin]

Here's a bit more from this.

[Matthew Crosby]

Why don't you text your wife? They're together.

[Nish Kumar]

We've gone further away in an attempt to sort of get towards the fireworks.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm crying.

[Nish Kumar]

Amy's not happy about things that are happening in her life at this current moment in time. But you know the old saying, sometimes you gotta go far away from Beckenham park to see Crosby.

[Matthew Crosby]

What's he on about now?

[Ed Gamble]

I don't know. He's lost his mind.

[Matthew Crosby]

He's lost his mind.

[Ed Gamble]

I mean, both of them have lost their mind.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm crying.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm crying.

[Matthew Crosby]

I love fireworks.

[Ian Smith]

I love fireworks.

[Ed Gamble]

The saddest phrase ever. Ever uttered. So distraught she couldn't even complete the word fireworks.

[Matthew Crosby]

I love Fower.

[Ed Gamble]

We all love Fower, Amy. We all love Fower.

[Matthew Crosby]

But you missed the.

[Ed Gamble]

This is Dunk and Anti.

[Matthew Crosby]

So stupid.

[Ed Gamble]

Such a silly show. Skunk and Nancy here on radio.

[Matthew Crosby]

What do you up to this week? Oh, they've got someone else to record a review of some fireworks from a.

[Ed Gamble]

Car radio X. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Radio X Announcer]

This is the Radio X heyday.

[Matthew Crosby]

So far they've been stuck in the.

[Ed Gamble]

Car traveling down Village way.

[Matthew Crosby]

They were late. They could hear the Fiwa but they couldn't see Firewire.

[Ed Gamble]

And they love Farwa and they love Firewa. They love fawa. I cry, they cry. They cry because they love fawa. So here is the final message recorded on Nish's phone. We don't know whether it's in the car or whether he's actually gonna have.

[Matthew Crosby]

Made it to the fireworks.

[Ed Gamble]

Fingers crossed, guys.

[Nish Kumar]

We've got out of the car just to watch, just from the side of the road and I can actually. I can hear Crosby. These GD kids would just shut their holes. We've arrived at the fireworks and they've. We still parked the car. We've pulled up to the park and they finished. So the fireworks have ended. We saw a bit of it from the car. Quite difficult to give a sort of Broad overview of Crosby's performance or the event. Here's my main takeaway. The Beckenham fireworks. This is my review. Do not start at 7:30. They start at 7:50 promptly. And if you are going to get there, make sure you give enough time to find parking. And I cannot stress this enough, they begin at 7:15. Oh, we can hear Crosby. He's making an announcement about lost handbag. It's very, very clear. Five stars.

[Ed Gamble]

So we finally got.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, finally got the review. They start at 7:15.

[Ed Gamble]

They start at 7:15. And very clear.

[Matthew Crosby]

And very clear for you. Yeah. He seems obsessed with the fact you were doing some sort of performance during the fireworks.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, which I wasn't. I can't stress enough. If you want to come and see fireworks uninterrupted, all you've got is a little bit of music underneath it. I'm not telling you that they're fireworks next year.

[Matthew Crosby]

To light one and let it go.

[Ed Gamble]

Out your bum like the wonderful supporter did. Yes, yeah. The wonderful football supporter. Yes, I am, actually.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. That would be great, Great, wouldn't it?

[Ed Gamble]

That would be really good.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes.

[Matthew Crosby]

Or strap yourself naked to a Catherine wheel.

[Ed Gamble]

I think these are.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well. And go.

[Ed Gamble]

I think.

[Matthew Crosby]

Go around.

[Ed Gamble]

I think probably strap myself naked to the Catherine wheel would be the. The grown up show.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ed Gamble]

And then the one coming up my bum. That'd be the kids show.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, it's still naked, isn't it?

[Ed Gamble]

I think. I think bums are less. Less rude.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's probably true, but it depends. Are you just pulling down your trousers? The back.

[Ed Gamble]

Just lifting my kilt up. That's all I'm doing.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but then if you're on all fours, which you'd have to be for the fireworks.

[Ed Gamble]

No, I would be flat on my. I'd be flat on the ground.

[Matthew Crosby]

And then pull your legs up because you have to aim the firework up. So then you're seeing everything.

[Ed Gamble]

He's got a very pert butt.

[Matthew Crosby]

It doesn't go all the way around and up.

[Ed Gamble]

It does. It does, mate.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's not per. That's medical.

[Ed Gamble]

Listen, I recently had an operation in Turkey. You should see it. It looks absolutely sensational.

[Matthew Crosby]

One of the only people to get.

[Ed Gamble]

A corner put in his buttocks Mask, you crobly.

[Radio X Announcer]

And radio ed.

[Ed Gamble]

Radio X. I don't know, Matthew.

[Matthew Crosby]

We've got another. Another interview now, haven't we?

[Ed Gamble]

I think it's our final one of the show. This was.

[Matthew Crosby]

But not ever, because I want this to happen every week.

[Ed Gamble]

Happy to do it. Yes, happy to do it.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm gonna go and get out and about.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you think I should get out into the streets?

[Matthew Crosby]

Get out onto the streets. Where do all the vloggers go? Not vloggers, influencers. To Carnaby Street. Stand on the street.

[Ed Gamble]

Stand on Carnaby Street. What I really want.

[Matthew Crosby]

You won't be filming it, of course. It looked quite weird.

[Nish Kumar]

Just.

[Ed Gamble]

Just. What I want is for an influen come up to me and say, hey, what are you listening to?

[Matthew Crosby]

No one's really good. I would love that. Only if it's one of the old men ones. That's what's gonna happen. Yeah. I don't get. I. I put on outfits to go out and trot around Soho. Don't get any of these people. Talk us through what you're wearing.

[Ed Gamble]

I'd love that.

[Matthew Crosby]

And what smell have you got on?

[Ed Gamble]

It's the smell of a T shirt I haven't washed. That's what the smell is. Yeah. This is my fantastic chat with Millie. I loved chatting to Millie. Here is our chat now. Okay, so I'm here with Millie right now. Millie, can I ask. Ask, how old of a person are you?

[Hannah]

20.

[Ed Gamble]

20. So what are the kids up to these days?

[Hannah]

So the kids are on Tick Tock all the time. Probably going around saying, six, seven.

[Ed Gamble]

Right? Yes. What is your algorithm throwing up to you on. On. If I was to open up your Tick Tock right now, what would you be seeing that's different? To what? Well, I don't have Tick Tock, but what I might be seeing, my Tick.

[Hannah]

Tock page is full of probably, like, fashion and like, Tick Tock Shop's massive now, so like, loads of kids are rather like, buying or selling on Tick Tock shop. Obviously over 18. But that's. That's huge now. You don't have to, like, have a name to get on there and be a. Be a part of it and stuff, but it's like a good way that, like, people are making money.

[Ed Gamble]

Speaking of fashion, what do you think of what I've got on right now? What do you think of my. My threads?

[Hannah]

What do you mean? My threads?

[Ed Gamble]

My clothes. Do kids not say threads anymore?

[Hannah]

I thought of Twitter when you said.

[Ed Gamble]

That the threads, the other. The one that was like the meta's alternative to Twitter. No, no, I mean clothes. What do you think of my clothes? Do kids still say clothes?

[Hannah]

Yeah, no, I think that's. This is a cool outfit. Yeah, this is a cool outfit. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. It sounds like you said that through gritted teeth, but I'm Gonna. I'm gonna accept it. Are you whatsapping in the club?

[Hannah]

I actually don't use WhatsApp. I think that's like, something I would say for my age. It's just imessage all the way.

[Ed Gamble]

I'd say you're back to I imessage. This is so good. Because I love a good imessage. Are you imessaging in the club? So if we were in a club together right now and the music was so loud, we would. We would imessage or WhatsApp each other? Is that happening?

[Hannah]

Not if I'm in front of me friend, but if we lose each other all the time, we always imessage. But we. We don't. We don't send a text. Like, what we do is like, get Snapchat up and write. Write out something and you can make it big and like zoom in on the phone. And then we just hold it up at each other's face so that we can see what we're saying here.

[Matthew Crosby]

Very informative. Thank you, Millie. I'll be honest, it's wonderful watching Matthew cringe at something he said very recently.

[Ed Gamble]

Two days ago, it was the.

[Matthew Crosby]

I mean, obviously the. What do you think of my threads? What do you mean?

[Ed Gamble]

I thought people were still saying threads. Did they not say threads and clobber? Are these not phrases that kids use?

[Matthew Crosby]

Clobber? No one said clobber in my generation.

[Ed Gamble]

Did they not say nice bit of schmutter? Do they not say that anymore? Surely not.

[Matthew Crosby]

I've never even heard that before. No, I'd imagine we said. We're not still on drip, are we?

[Ed Gamble]

No, I think drips. I think drip is very much. It wasn't even our generation.

[Vin]

Yeah, it's fit checks, isn't it?

[Ed Gamble]

Do I. Do I look fit, though? Feels.

[Matthew Crosby]

Would you like my fit? That's not what you say.

[Ed Gamble]

Do I look like a right fitting. Am I a sort? I think I'm a sort. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby on Radio X.

[Radio X Announcer]

Fire in the booth.

[Ed Gamble]

Bye, everybody. Parting is such sweet sorrow. We've had a lovely time. Time. And, you know what.

[Matthew Crosby]

Is he killed? He's killed someone.

[Ed Gamble]

I've just murdered somebody.

[Matthew Crosby]

Just.

[Ed Gamble]

Just murdered. I. I tell you, I had such a nice time chatting to the young people that we've actually got some other chats we're going to play next week.

[Matthew Crosby]

Do they watch Traitors Uncloaked, the Young people?

[Ed Gamble]

Well, you'll have to. I did actually talk about Traitors Uncloaked with. With one of our.

[Vin]

I don't Think it will make the edit.

[Ed Gamble]

He was so rude about you, Ed. He was so. He was absolutely scathing about you.

[Matthew Crosby]

Believable. Not true. He's jealous.

[Ed Gamble]

He's jealous of your threads. Yeah, that's what it is. Your cloak. No, I had a lovely time chatting, of course, to Finn and to Hannah and to Millie. What a wonderful chat it was.

[Matthew Crosby]

And more young people chat next week.

[Ed Gamble]

More young people chat next week. And thanks, of course, to Nish Kumar for recording his wonderful messages. Thanks to Amy Annette and thanks to Ian Smith. Go and see Ian Smith in Estonia. But from us, it's goodbye. Bye.

[Matthew Crosby]

Bye.

[Radio X Announcer]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, there we are, Matthew. I feel younger.

[Ed Gamble]

Jam packed show. Yeah, it's rejuvenating, isn't it, talking to young people. Hearing. Hearing me talk to young people.

[Vin]

You want to hear some more young chat?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Bonus young chat.

[Vin]

Bit more from Finn.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. So you're 19, you're still a kid, right?

[Finn Mendez]

Yeah, I think so. I guess so.

[Ed Gamble]

What age do you think you're no longer a kid?

[Finn Mendez]

Well, I mean, a kid is like. When I think of a kid, I think of like a 15 year old. I wouldn't call myself a kid, you know, I would call myself a young adult because that's kind of what I am.

[Ed Gamble]

At what age do you stop being a young adult?

[Finn Mendez]

24.

[Ed Gamble]

24. And what are you? 25. Onwards.

[Finn Mendez]

UNK status. It's like uncle status.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you think I've got unc status energy?

[Finn Mendez]

Nah, you don't know. You're kind of hip.

[Ed Gamble]

You know what? That's all I needed. Finn, what a pleasure.

[Matthew Crosby]

He's lying to you, man. Your ultimate unc.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm so Unc.

[Matthew Crosby]

You're so uncle. And I think that's. That's fine.

[Ed Gamble]

Nothing wrong with being unk.

[Ian Smith]

I am an unk.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

You know, mad. To be. To be an unk and not have unk energy.

[Matthew Crosby]

And you're of unk status. And you're a far.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm a far and an unknown.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And I'm a as well.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, we'll let you decide on that one, then.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah.

[Vin]

Interesting.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, it's lovely you can produce radio shows for as long as you have and still have, like, gray areas that you need to work out.

[Nish Kumar]

What?

[Ed Gamble]

I love green spaces.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Vin]

Okay.

[Ed Gamble]

That's all it is.

[Finn Mendez]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. A couple of messages here that are sort of. They've got a lot in them, so I thought we should read these on the other side. Happy radio, lads.

[Matthew Crosby]

Don't mind if I do.

[Ed Gamble]

This is from Mike. My wife is 27, I'm 31. Jackpot. Thank you, Mike. At the minute, she's watching K Pop Demon Hunters a lot and doing a yoga teacher training course on yoga. That's telling us what the young people are up to, of course, on yoga. Claire Sweeney attended the class we go to a few weeks back. Not seen her since. I also bumped into Justin Moorhouse in my local co op earlier in the year. I asked what he was doing on the Wirral and he said he was visiting his mate who's a physio. He was really nice. This is another. He's got a good idea for a feature here. Idea for a feature adjacent to who? Do I not know who it is? Who's the most famous person you wouldn't recognize? I really like that. I don't know what Jeremy Irons looks like.

[Matthew Crosby]

Like. Oh, that's interesting.

[Ed Gamble]

I don't think. And he said, I had this with Cheryl Crow for ages, but then buckled one day and googled her. Yeah, I could google ji, but I like the idea of learning it in the wild. Yeah, I think that's it. Bye, Mike. That was it, Mike.

[Matthew Crosby]

You could learn it in the wilds of Africa. Of course it's Jeremy Irons.

[Ed Gamble]

Of course.

[Matthew Crosby]

Scar, another Unk character. Huge hunk energy.

[Ed Gamble]

And this is from Godfrey, the X line hunk.

[Vin]

This is goddess.

[Ed Gamble]

This is goddess. Yeah, yeah. You are more of a. By the way, you are definitely a hunk. Listen, I. I didn't want that to just fall on stony ground there. Ed Gamble is a big old hunk and he looks like a man who wrestles dinosaurs in Lutterworth. So this is from Godfrey, the ex liar. Dear Hench, old and peculiar. Do we need to read on? Has the message just peaked there? I feel like it has.

[Matthew Crosby]

Email Breathy lady now.

[Ed Gamble]

Headshot and peculiar. Love every bit of that. You got us banged to rights, Gods. Merry radio, lads. Tis the season, tisn't it? Yes. Don't mind if I diddly do. One time in 2006, I picked up an olive for Bjork, an Australian Qantas Club executive flight lounge after her after her stint of big day outs now defunct Australian Music Festival. In my panic at meeting the OG Pixie Dream girl, I offered the floor olive back to her and she said, no thanks, it's been on the floor. No thanks, it's been on the floor. It's oh so dusty. I kept the olive on my. Oh no. I was too horrified to explain the 10 second rule to her 10 second rule.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, it's five second rule. I think. Well, it depends where you are in the world.

[Ed Gamble]

And I think it depends on the moisture of the food.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. And the.

[Vin]

How tasty it is.

[Matthew Crosby]

And the state of the floor.

[Ed Gamble]

And the state of the floor.

[Matthew Crosby]

And who watching.

[Ed Gamble]

I was too horrified to cook.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'd eat dinner off the floor. If there's no one there, who cares?

[Ed Gamble]

Right.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

How clean do you honestly think your plates are? That fork you're eating from in a restaurant has been in probably 400 people's mouths. And you're totally cool with that and the rest. And yeah, I was too horrified to explain the 10 second rule to it, so I just replied, I like your music, and scuttled off fastish, holding the olive. I kept that olive on my bedside table for two years until it went absolutely poggers. And my mother bribed me to throw it out with the promise of tickets. Tickets, tickets to the 2009 Big Day out where I got to see Neil Young, Brackets Matthew, Arctic Monkeys, Vin and Bullet. For my Valentine.

[Matthew Crosby]

Henchard and Peculiar.

[Ed Gamble]

This one's true. Please delist me from the blocked email as I promise I'll be good and true from now on. Godfrey the ex Liar. Thank you very much.

[Matthew Crosby]

Cheers, Godders.

[Ed Gamble]

We've also got one more message from someone who's Italian and says, who's Alan Partridge? Momo, just treat yourself.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, don't just listen to this.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, that's true.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. You basically know who Alan Partridges. You listen to this podcast. Bet.

[Matthew Crosby]

Rex. Yes. I went to see Kundra last night.

[Ed Gamble]

Fantastic.

[Matthew Crosby]

Amazing. At a concert at the Underworld. They're incredible. The new album's amazing. It's called Unself.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm imagining they do a big show. Are they doing a. Do they?

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, it's in the Underworld, so it's.

[Ed Gamble]

But is it theatrics on stage?

[Matthew Crosby]

No, not really.

[Ed Gamble]

Really? They just.

[Matthew Crosby]

No. Look like a good light show, but like simple, like effective.

[Ed Gamble]

Guess you don't need to. And you've got conjuror songs.

[Matthew Crosby]

Not a lot of chat, just straight in. It's great. They're very, very good. But Unself is the album and I would highly recommend it if you enjoy heavier music or you would like to get into heavier music.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, they are very good. Yeah, I. Oh, I've just. That's. I've just been listening to that same album that I can't remember with a.

[Vin]

Name of the hypopop one.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. It's got my computer on it's very good.

[Vin]

Nina Jirachi.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Really. Really. The more I listen to it, the more I like it.

[Vin]

I love my computer.

[Ed Gamble]

I love my computer. Yeah. It's a brilliant record. It's abs. It couldn't be more in my wheelhouse. I think it's fan dabby Dozy. And I'm sure that's exactly the review she was hoping for.

[Matthew Crosby]

I would like to recommend another album.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, yes, please.

[Matthew Crosby]

An album called Soft Spot by Honing Buck, who are a, I believe, Norwegian punk band. I think they're Norwegian, Scandinavian, of some flavor. Honing Banner.

[Ed Gamble]

What kind of. What kind of punk are we talking? Are we talking hardcore? Okay. Like a Minor Threats type band?

[Matthew Crosby]

No. I mean, hardcore's kind of ambiguous now, really, but they're very, very good. I would recommend. I would recommend it to both of you, actually.

[Ed Gamble]

Fantastic.

[Matthew Crosby]

I think now we're seeing, in the wake of Turnstile, a lot of bands coming through and they've been around for ages huntingvana. But it feels like a bit of a spike in popularity of interesting hardcore.

[Ed Gamble]

That new Turnstile song or the single. What an odd song. I really like it.

[Ian Smith]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

It sounds like. It's almost like a cross between Sting and Morrissey. Weirdly, it feels like a Smith songwriting sensibility.

[Matthew Crosby]

They've got a lot. They've got a lot of that in them. The last album especially.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, I. Yeah, I was really. I heard that on the radio the other day. I was like, oh. I mean, I really enjoyed it, but it's not what I think of when I think of Turnstile. But I loved it. Finn, what about you?

[Vin]

There's a new Danny Brown album. Have you heard that yet?

[Matthew Crosby]

I still not heard it.

[Vin]

It's good.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but it's great.

[Ed Gamble]

It's.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's hyper poppy as well.

[Vin]

Yeah, it's poppier. It's called Stardust. Yeah, it's still got weird stuff on it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. There's still a lot of.

[Ian Smith]

Ha.

[Vin]

Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah. But it's not as weird as the last few ones. Yeah, it's got. There's a, like. I would say at least two, like, pop songs.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. Great.

[Vin]

So that's cool.

[Matthew Crosby]

I love it when Danny Brown does just Bangers.

[Vin]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

When he does, like, straight up, like, Ain't it funny? Bangers love him.

[Vin]

So I backtrack that. And also Kid A.

[Ed Gamble]

Kid A, yes, of course.

[Vin]

Gotten into Kid A again. Bloody hell.

[Finn Mendez]

It's good.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no. Radiohead. They dropped off so hard after the Bends.

[Vin]

Have you listened to Kid A, though?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Vin]

It is amazing.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, by the way, as well, another band I wanted to recommend to you. If you and your lovely wife are not listening to. Remember Sports, you should be. Do you know Remember Sports?

[Matthew Crosby]

No.

[Ed Gamble]

They are absolutely in that ilk of kind of power pop punk. They're absolutely brilliant.

[Matthew Crosby]

They've got a new single, Way Home.

[Ed Gamble]

Got a new single called Bug out, which popped up on my release radar this morning. I thought, yeah, they're a good band.

[Vin]

Benz is good, isn't it as well.

[Ed Gamble]

The Benz is. I think. You know what? The Benz, whoever bought Tom Yorker.

[Ian Smith]

Computer.

[Ed Gamble]

Computer. Should be slapped on the wrist.

[Vin]

No, no, because the bed's great, man.

[Ed Gamble]

Soon, you know, as soon as he got himself a mobile phone. BEEPS AND BOOPS Everything dropped off. Everything dropped.

[Matthew Crosby]

I like okay computer.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, but I like the ones that sound like the Bends. It could have been. I like the Benz. It's a good album. So, yeah, big bet rep for the Benz. Big rec for kid.

[Vin]

A chocolate computer in there as well.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, Chuck.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay, Computer in there.

[Matthew Crosby]

Come on. Police.

[Ed Gamble]

Lovely song. Yeah, really great song. Anyway, it was real ox status to end the. To end the podcast there. See you next week.

[Finn Mendez]

Bye.

[Matthew Crosby]

Bye.