Episode 359 - Catherine Bohart / Deliveroo Trousers

Summary

Podcast Summary: Ed Gamble & Matthew Crosby on Radio X

Episode 359 – Catherine Bohart / Deliveroo Trousers

Original Airdate: May 17, 2026
Hosts: Ed Gamble & Matthew Crosby (AKA Crunch & Crumble)
Guest: Catherine Bohart
Producer: John (sitting in for Vin)

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Main Theme

This episode is a characteristically whimsical, offbeat, and irreverent Sunday morning show. Ed and Matthew riff on their lack of radio polish, new trousers, barbecue mishaps, and feature a hilarious deep-dive guest spot with stand-up comedian Catherine Bohart. Other highlights include bizarre business ideas (like Deliveroo for trousers), an enthusiastic debate about laundry machines, and one of the show’s staple segments, "Metal Education," which this week revolves around outlandish Midsomer Murders plots.

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Episode Highlights & Key Segments

1. Pre-Show Banter: "Clippable Content" & Technical Difficulties

00:40 – 04:00

• The guys joke about pre-recording shows and having shorter episodes than usual.
• “[Last time] we did 38 minutes of content. Wasn't that show live? …God knows what the next ones are going to be like—about 12 minutes.” (Ed Gamble, 01:33)
• Set up the episode’s running joke: Is this show ever really ‘live’?

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2. Welcome Producer John & Housekeeping Chaos

04:00 – 05:00

• Producer John is standing in for Vin, and the pair revel in the chaos this brings, likening John to a “supply teacher” and relishing the potential for disarray.
• Memories of past mishaps running the studio desk themselves.
• “I've been allowed to be in control of the desk before, and it was one of the worst shows we've ever done.” (Matthew Crosby, 05:10)

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3. Home Life: Moving House & Barbecue Antics

06:00 – 08:30

• Matthew has just moved house and reveals his joy for being at home: “I hate being out... It's not just here. I hate being—it's everywhere that's not my house.” (Matthew, 06:39)
• Detailed discussion of barbecue technique, including grilling lettuce:
  • “Last night was the inaugural...relaunch of the barbecue...chicken skewers, chimichurri, sausages...grilled some gem lettuce with pomegranate molasses...” (Matthew, 07:15)

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4. Trouser Woes: A Sartorial Adventure

09:00 – 15:00

• Ed’s jeans disaster: washed them, and they came out “dank…not in a good way.”
• Running low on trousers, Ed consults a fashion journalist who slides into his DMs to help.
• “I can help you with your trousers.” (Ed, 10:21)
• Classic Ed vs. Matthew debate about gendered fashion:
  • “No such thing as ladies’ fashion and men’s fashion anymore.” (Ed, 11:38)
  • “There is.” (Matthew, 11:38)
• Humorous back-and-forth about budget constraints:
  • “My budget is £35 for an entire new wardrobe.” (Ed, 13:29)

Quote

“This is not an update, Matthew. This is a fantasy you have in your head.”
— Matthew Crosby (12:34)

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5. "Deliveroo for Trousers": Absurd Business Pitch

15:10 – 17:00

• The pair dream up a business idea: ordering trousers via Deliveroo, with the Deliveroo rider acting as a personal shopper and tailor.
• “You go through the full wardrobe...access to the Debenhams catalogue...they stay while you try things on, they take it up if needed, they’ve got a bibber...” (Matthew, 16:07)
• The idea escalates quickly, involving Deliveroo riders modeling (and potentially leaving in their pants).
• Catherine Bohart is teased as coming up to react to their scheme.

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6. Trousers on Deliveroo? Plus: Fashion Grievances

17:40 – 20:40

• Producer John humorously checks if you actually can get trousers on Deliveroo—spoiler: only work trousers from Screw Fix.
• The rise of the “workwear fashion trend”—but not all workwear is in vogue:
  • “They're Dewalt trousers...These aren't stylish work trousers. These are actual work trousers.” (Ed, 18:24)
• Ed vents:
  • “I do resent the fact that as a small person I’m paying the same as a big tall boy for jeans!” (Ed, 19:43)

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7. Guest Segment – Catherine Bohart: Haircuts, House Moves, and Obsessive Cleaning

21:22 – 33:00

• Catherine reacts to Matthew's drastic haircut:
  • “I'm still in shock about your hair. I love it, but...” (Catherine, 21:45)
• She shares her own moving tales, and her “compulsion” for cleaning appliances, especially washing machines:
  • “I love to learn how to get in there and clean it ...I feel a relief after I’ve done it.” (Catherine, 24:21)
• The trio swaps dishwasher and house chores confessions.

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Notable Quotes

“Do you want to come around my house?”
— Ed Gamble, inviting Catherine to clean his washing machine (24:21)

“I certainly feel compelled to [clean], compulsively, yes.”
— Catherine Bohart (24:14)

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8. Comedy Tour Chat – Catherine's "Borrowing Trouble"

25:15 – 30:10

• Catherine explains her show title: Borrowing Trouble comes from anxiety and “ruining my present with the fear of potential futures.”
• “It would be easier to take the advice to not borrow trouble from my father if he weren’t such a Catholic.” (Catherine, 26:00)
• Fringe and Soho Theatre dates plugged (28:08 onwards), plus discussion about “work in progress” comedy and the anxiety of not being ready.

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9. Embarrassment: Shouldn’t Be, But Is

30:28 – 33:15

• The gang discusses things that shouldn’t be embarrassing but are—public falls, photo booths, and choking:
  • “Falling over…everyone does it… but it’s still mortifying.” (Catherine, 31:08)
• Matthew confesses he’s now immune to embarrassment:
  • “As soon as I turned 40, I completely lost any feelings of embarrassment…” (Matthew, 31:30)
• Catherine: “I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night thinking about a time I fell over when I was 16.” (32:24)

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10. Toilet Attendants & Chupa Chups

33:45 – 36:40

• Ed asks Catherine if she’s ever taken a Chupa Chup from a club toilet attendant (“from the bogs”):
  • “Nope.” (Catherine, 34:52)
• Darkly comic takes on whether adults should ever have lollipops; Ed’s “Everlasting Gobstopper” anecdote.

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11. Meatier Features – Metal Education: "John Nettles Education" (Midsomer Murders Plots)

39:14 – 48:12

• Ed attempts to distinguish real from fake Midsomer Murders episode synopses.
• Sample titles: “Count Your Blessings,” “Lawn of the Dead,” “A Clockwork Porridge,” and “Send in the Clowns.”
• Humiliated by a poor showing:
  • “How is that the case? Because my brain’s dying a bit.” (Ed, 48:12)

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12. Listener Email – Moving Disaster: "Womb Slop"

48:50 – 50:10

• Matthew shares a "moving disasters" email from listener Tom: The first day in a new flat, amniotic fluid from the upstairs neighbor’s home birth leaks through the ceiling.
• “Our flat was being slowly flooded with water and amniotic fluid leaking from her birthing pool.” (Email read by Ed, 49:37)
• Both hosts are appalled/delighted: “Womb slop. Playing them next week for Metal Uncle.” (Matthew, 50:08)

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13. Outro & Podcast Recommendations

52:06 – 54:45

• Pod Picks:
  • Ed: “Love Trap—about the most hated ever Bachelor contestant. It couldn’t be more trashy.” (Ed, 52:46)
  • Matthew: “Mariana in Conspiracy Land… also Top Comment.” (Matthew & Ed, 52:54)
• Producer John: “Nothing to Declare” (endless on TV), “Homes Under the Hammer 24/7.”
• The episode wraps with the usual joyful chaos and gratitude to the audience and guest.

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Memorable Moments

• Montage Fantasy: Ed imagines a Pretty Woman-style shopping montage with his new stylist—“I come out in a really big pair of trousers and she shakes her head…” (12:52)
• Barbecue Tales: Grilling lettuce with pomegranate molasses, much to Ed’s confusion.
• Deliveroo for Trousers: A genesis-of-a-startup riff that spirals into surreal territory about naked Deliveroo drivers and at-home tailoring.
• “Womb slop” Incident: Maybe the grossest, funniest voicemail ever read on the show.
• Midsomer Murders Metal Education: Death by cuckoo clock, truffles, and clown rivalry—astonishingly, most are real.

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Key Timestamps

• 00:40 – Show begins, pre-recording jokes
• 04:43 – Studio chaos, welcome Producer John
• 07:00 – Barbecue talk, grilling lettuce
• 10:21 – Ed’s trousers DM adventure
• 15:24 – “Deliveroo for trousers” business brainstorm
• 17:54 – Actual trousers on Deliveroo?
• 21:22 – Catherine Bohart guest segment begins
• 24:21 – Catherine on compulsive washing machine cleaning
• 25:21 – “Borrowing Trouble” comedy tour chat
• 31:08 – Things that shouldn’t be embarrassing
• 34:52 – Toilet attendant/Chupa Chup segment
• 39:14 – Metal Education: Midsomer Murders quiz
• 49:02 – Listener moving disaster email: “womb slop”
• 52:06 – Podcast recommendations, wrap-up

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Style & Tone

The episode is a masterclass in UK comedy double-act riffing: playful, silly, conversational, with an undercurrent of absurdity and the self-aware incompetence that makes Ed and Matthew’s brunch shows so beloved. Even their “serious” guest interview gently spirals into the weird, mundane, or slightly gross.

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In summary:
A quintessential “Crunch & Crumble” episode mixing domestic disaster, fashion failure, DIY business pitches, and deadpan gamesmanship, all peaking with a delightfully daft guest spot from Catherine Bohart and capped with the immortal tale of "womb slop."
If you missed it, you missed roast lettuce, Dewalt cargo pants, and some of the best lollipop etiquette advice radio can offer.

Transcript

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[Ed Gamble]

This is a global Player Original podcast. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby Radio X

[Matthew Crosby]

hello, it's Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby here. You're about to hear the radio show that we did on Sunday.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Or clips of it. Long clips.

[Ed Gamble]

Long clips of it. And we didn't do it on Sunday.

[Matthew Crosby]

Clippable content.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, Clippable content.

[Matthew Crosby]

That was on on Sunday.

[Ed Gamble]

It was on on Sunday.

[Matthew Crosby]

It was a pre record. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes. We're still in our mad. Let's try and pre record. Record every show.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ed Gamble]

For the rest of the year.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. So let's get on with it.

[Ed Gamble]

Let's get on with it. Guys. I'm gonna read this email very quickly,

[Matthew Crosby]

like getting on with it.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, that is. This is it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Hurry up.

[Ed Gamble]

By the way, can I just say this? Did you know. So did you see the. The time. The time code on the last episode we did?

[Matthew Crosby]

No.

[Ed Gamble]

So the episodes are normally an hour, hour and five if it's me and a guest. Aaron. 25. But it was 38 minutes long.

[Matthew Crosby]

Was it?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

How?

[Ed Gamble]

I don't know. I've not listened to it.

[Matthew Crosby]

What did we say?

[Ed Gamble]

I've got no idea. But we did 38 minutes of content.

[Matthew Crosby]

Wasn't that show live?

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no, it wasn't. It was the first. It was the first of the three on the day we did three.

[Matthew Crosby]

God knows what the next ones are gonna be like.

[Ed Gamble]

That's what I'm thinking.

[Matthew Crosby]

About 12 minutes it's gonna be. How have we got this far into the show and only just crack? We can do that.

[Ed Gamble]

We can do 38 minutes long. Yes. This is from Stuart from Nottingham. He says possible entry for a couple of texters. What? Do I not know who it is? I. Who Joan Armor Trading is? And when I first heard the name, I thought it must relate to some sort of shop buying and selling medieval battle garments.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

New texture of who. Do I not know who it is? And sounds like something else. Maybe. Good looking. The charts this week. Stuart from Nottingham.

[Matthew Crosby]

Lovely.

[Ed Gamble]

So [e-mail] if you've got somebody that you don't know who they are.

[Matthew Crosby]

Not only you think they sound like

[Ed Gamble]

something else, maybe you sound like something else. Maybe. Get in touch. Yes, we've got the brilliant Catherine Bohart on the show today. We had a lovely chat with her. She's absolutely brilliant.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ed Gamble]

So let's not waste any more time. This is 38 minutes of the finest content.

[Matthew Crosby]

Including this.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, including the. That's true as well. It's including the intro and outros we did for the. Oh, my God. Unbelievable.

[Matthew Crosby]

Here's the show.

[Ed Gamble]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby. Radio X. It's the Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby show on Radio X and we have got some big news. Vin is away on holiday for the next two weeks in Thailand. Cheeky boy. But that means we have in his place producer John. Yes. Two weeks with the supply teacher. I mean, a very different but very, very much in charge producer. Now, we know John's been here before, but just to remind him of the way it normally works when Vin is here. Firstly, 6, 7 isn't banned. I know it's banned in other studios but Vin's like a cool producer. He lets us do 6, 7. He also tries to get us to do 6, 9. Cheeky boy. Also, Vin normally lets us put on a dvd. I've got the box set of Twilight. We could watch that. Vin sometimes puts on his own DVDs, but they make us feel funny. Cheeky Boy. Also, Jon, can you hear a weird noise? Oh, John, I think the studio's broken. Jon, I think we all have to go home. John, can you hear that? John? You know, it sounds like the noise that Vin makes when he's googling hotels to stay in in Thailand. Cheeky Boy. Also, Vin lets us go on our phones, he lets us race our razor scooters all around the stud and he even lets us have cigarettes and alcohol even if all he's asked for is a croissant and oak flat white radio.

[Matthew Crosby]

Ed Gambler, Matthew Crosby here on Radio X of a Sunday morn.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes. Happy Sunday, everybody.

[Matthew Crosby]

Of course, there are some people in the world who go straight from Saturday to Monday.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, absolutely. The six weekers. As they're the six day weakers.

[Matthew Crosby]

As they Weakers.

[Ed Gamble]

The six day weekers, I think. I think they've got it right. Yeah, they get more weeks.

[Matthew Crosby]

They get. They do get more. They do get more weeks. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

The great thing about it, you know that, you know, there are those guys who like break up their day into sort of micro days.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And get more days.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

That's what we should be Doing? Yeah, they're more productive. I tell you what, if you want to be a CEO, forget about Sunday.

[Matthew Crosby]

Forget about Sunday. Straight back to work on your Monday.

[Ed Gamble]

Absolutely. Right. Happy Monday to all the CEOs out there. Happy Monday, everybody. Yes. We've also got producer John here.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, great to have producer John here. Thanks for coming on the show, John. It's my pleasure. Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

I mean, thanks for coming on the show and making the show happen.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. We wouldn't be able to do it otherwise. You don't know what any of the buttons do. We're not allowed to touch them, but that could be a fun way to pass the time. What is it? How do we. You guys press the buttons?

[Matthew Crosby]

We tried that before. It did not go well.

[Ed Gamble]

We've tried that before.

[Matthew Crosby]

I've been allowed to be in control of the desk before, and it was one of the worst shows we've ever done.

[Ed Gamble]

There was a good bit where you found a button that played an anecdote from Rob Beckett that lasted about two minutes.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And that was really good. I think that might have been the best bit of broadcast I have done.

[Matthew Crosby]

I had the Moles soundboard, and one

[Ed Gamble]

of the Moyle soundboards is a full anecdote from Rob Beckett.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

He's never. He's never come on the show. No, he's never come on the show.

[Matthew Crosby]

He's not come on any show I've done.

[Ed Gamble]

Does he not like you?

[Matthew Crosby]

Apparently not.

[Ed Gamble]

Wow. What a. What a great way is this. Is this Beef Season three, I think. Is that what it is? We've had Carey Mulligan and Oscar Isaacs. Now we've got Ed Gamble and Rob Beckett.

[Matthew Crosby]

Finally.

[Ed Gamble]

Finally a beef.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'd love that. I'd love to be on the new season of Beef.

[Ed Gamble]

I think that'd be really good. Yeah, but it's not. It's not a really active, like, you're not screaming at each other street kind of beef. It's just.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, we don't always cross paths. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

You follow the lives of two very separate people.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but. And when we do see each other, we actually get on pretty well.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Yeah. Because he's a lovely guy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. But, you know, just through his management, something's gone wrong.

[Ed Gamble]

Something's happened there. Yeah, it's. Anyway, look forward to that on Netflix. Ed, how are you doing, by the way?

[Matthew Crosby]

Pretty good.

[Ed Gamble]

Because you've been. Last time we spoke, you were moving house.

[Matthew Crosby]

Moved.

[Ed Gamble]

You're now moved.

[Matthew Crosby]

New house.

[Ed Gamble]

New house.

[Matthew Crosby]

Absolutely hate being out of it.

[Ed Gamble]

You hate being out of. You out of the. The old house or out of the new house?

[Matthew Crosby]

Out of the new house.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, okay, I get it. Sorry, I thought you were having buyers.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, no, I hate.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, I've made a huge mistake.

[Matthew Crosby]

I hate being out.

[Ed Gamble]

You hate being here.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

But you always hate being here.

[Matthew Crosby]

I want you to know that. Yes, I always hate being here. And also, it's not just here. I hate being. It's everywhere. That's not my house.

[Ed Gamble]

What's so good about your house? All the buckets.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's mine. I've got all. Loads of stuff. Play around with it. Cat's there, wife's there sometimes.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, that's nice. It does sound very idyllic, actually.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Barbecue. We've got a barbecue.

[Ed Gamble]

You've got the barbecue.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And you've. You know what? We've had the weather for it as well. Have you had. Have you been barbecuing in the garden last night?

[Matthew Crosby]

Last night was the inaugural, the. The new maiden voyage, the relaunch of the barbecue.

[Ed Gamble]

The barbecue, yeah. Nice. What did you do, talk us through your bbq?

[Matthew Crosby]

Very, very quick? Because my wife was home a bit late, so I did some chicken skewers. Chimichurri. Chicken skewers.

[Ed Gamble]

Lovely.

[Matthew Crosby]

And some. An array sausages. And then actually I grilled some red onions and grilled some gem lettuce.

[Ed Gamble]

You grilled lettuce?

[Matthew Crosby]

Put them together. Bit of pomegranate molasses. Ooh, lovely. It was good. Mint parsley.

[Ed Gamble]

Now, I've never grilled a lettuce before. I always assumed lettuce was one of those things that you just don't have to cook.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but that's why you're not a barbecue professional.

[Ed Gamble]

That's right. No, no, no.

[Matthew Crosby]

The barbecue pros out there know that anything can be grilled.

[Ed Gamble]

I bought a barbecue a few years ago. I couldn't get it to work and I left it outside. That's my entire story of having a barbecue.

[Matthew Crosby]

I mean, we've surely had this discussion before.

[Ed Gamble]

We have. Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

But was it a gas. Was it a gas barbecue?

[Ed Gamble]

It was a gas barbecue. And you said, there's your first mistake. You said, oh, you shouldn't have got a gas barbecue. You know, I've still got the gas.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

No one will take that away. We've tried to get rid of the gas. Oh, if you want gas, I've got it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Why are you trying to get rid of your gas?

[Ed Gamble]

Because I don't need it anymore. Cause I got rid of the barbecue.

[Matthew Crosby]

Do you not use It. For the oven.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, but. No, no, no. Yeah, but it's a can of gas. It's like a big old can of gas. Yeah, we've got gas in the house, of course, but we've got gas in the shed for no reason at all.

[Matthew Crosby]

Enable. Take that, Matthew.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. We'll put it on the street. WhatsApp. You don't want some gas?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, I got rid of some helium that way.

[Ed Gamble]

Did you? Yeah. What did you have helium for?

[Matthew Crosby]

For balloons for a party.

[Ed Gamble]

And you just had some spare.

[Matthew Crosby]

Anyone, Cans of spare helium. Put it on the WhatsApp group straight away. Yes, please.

[Ed Gamble]

Of course. Yeah, but that'll be the. That'll be the hipsters in your area.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Getting high off of it.

[Matthew Crosby]

I don't think that's possible.

[Ed Gamble]

When they're. When they're doing balloons, is that not what they're doing?

[Matthew Crosby]

I don't think we're allowed to talk about this, but. No, it's a different thing.

[Ed Gamble]

All right, well, we'll talk about something else after this. Robb J and the Machine, Radio X,

[Matthew Crosby]

Rock the Casbah.

[Ed Gamble]

Why not?

[Matthew Crosby]

The Clash at Gambler, Matthew Crosby. Of course. A casbar, I believe, Matthew, is a sort of Moroccan market.

[Ed Gamble]

That's right.

[Matthew Crosby]

Where they might sell trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

They might sell trousers. Yeah. You'd imagine in a Moroccan market, they might be more like a sort of MC Hammer pant.

[Matthew Crosby]

Quite jazzy.

[Ed Gamble]

Jazzy. Yes, exactly, exactly. I. I've. We were talking earlier. I've washed some jeans.

[Matthew Crosby]

You've washed some smelling.

[Ed Gamble]

I've washed some smell into the jeans.

[Matthew Crosby]

What is the smell that you washed into the jeans?

[Ed Gamble]

Dank.

[Matthew Crosby]

Dank.

[Ed Gamble]

It's dank.

[Matthew Crosby]

Not in a good way.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no, no, no, no. Not like a meme, like a basement.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, it's.

[Ed Gamble]

They're absolutely disgusting. My trousers now, so they're gone. So I'm now down to two pairs of trousers. Two. Two. Well, two. Two pairs of trousers for daily wear.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I've got a few suits.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but you don't. That's bottom of the barrel. The suit trousers may be smart in some contexts, but when you're wearing them with a T shirt out and about, they are the least smart thing you could possibly wear.

[Ed Gamble]

It's really bad.

[Matthew Crosby]

Everything's gone wrong.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm not gonna be wearing the. I'm not gonna be wearing my funeral trousers. I'm gonna be wearing my. I'm gonna wear my black jeans, which obviously my rock funeral trousers and my blue jeans.

[Matthew Crosby]

You wore those to Aussies funerals?

[Ed Gamble]

Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, yeah. My black jeans or the jeans I'm wearing right now. But I got a DM on Instagram from somebody saying, I can help you with your trousers. Now, of course, I showed that to my wife straight away, because anytime you get a DM saying, I can help you with your trousers, you know, you

[Matthew Crosby]

have to show it to your wife

[Ed Gamble]

to show it to your wife. So nothing untoward is happening.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

But it turns out there's a, a fashion journalist who listens to the show.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, my goodness.

[Ed Gamble]

Who got in touch with us.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm gonna put it out there. I don't think they're a very good one if they listen to this.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I, when I, I check.

[Matthew Crosby]

Not cool fashion.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, No, I don't think, I don't think she's listening to the show, getting tips for fashion.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, but with very fashionable people, every single element of their life, fashion and trends bleed into it.

[Ed Gamble]

So you're supposed. Well, look, I, I checked out this person. She's got good credentials. She's written for Gentleman's Quarterly magazine.

[Matthew Crosby]

Right.

[Ed Gamble]

So she understands. She then emailed me and said, I'm also the exact same height as you. So I feel like, I feel like now I'm on a trouser based odyssey with my own professional stylist, a guru,

[Matthew Crosby]

a Sherpa of trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

Exactly. Yeah, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

So the same. But why does it matter that she's the same height as you?

[Ed Gamble]

Because she's gonna lend me her try.

[Matthew Crosby]

She's gonna give you some ladies fashion trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

No. Well, listen, the thing is now there

[Matthew Crosby]

is some trousers with pockets all over them.

[Ed Gamble]

No, there's no such thing as ladies fashion and men's fashion anymore.

[Matthew Crosby]

There is.

[Ed Gamble]

There isn't. No, there isn't. It's. We've got, you know, it's complete equality. For what wear.

[Matthew Crosby]

I think in some areas. Absolutely. And, you know, all power to that. But I think there's definitely a, a lady's trouser and there's a man's trouser.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no. I'm gonna wear absolutely enormous trousers like I'm one of the Mitford sisters. That's what I'm gonna. That's what I'm gonna. Anyway, listen, I don't know.

[Matthew Crosby]

So have you got the trousers yet?

[Ed Gamble]

No, no.

[Matthew Crosby]

So what's she doing for you?

[Ed Gamble]

Well, she's just.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm a fashion journalist.

[Ed Gamble]

We're getting, we're getting our calendars aligned.

[Matthew Crosby]

What for?

[Ed Gamble]

To, to work out how we're. Well, I'm gonna say to a. Look, you take me to wherever you buy trousers from Mayfair. Do you buy trousers from Mayfair? You take me to London's Mayfair and we'll go shopping together and you can be my stylist.

[Matthew Crosby]

Does she know that you're planning on going shopping with her or is she just gonna send you some links to some trousers?

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I don't know. What, I don't know how the stylist works, but I've seen it in the movies.

[Matthew Crosby]

So she's your stylist?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, she's my stylist.

[Matthew Crosby]

Has she agreed to that?

[Ed Gamble]

Not yet, but listen, this is, this

[Matthew Crosby]

is not an update, Matthew. This is a fantasy you have in your head.

[Ed Gamble]

I've yet to send the follow up email.

[Matthew Crosby]

Have you responded at all?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, I've responded, I've responded to her. But what I think I'm gonna suggest is, you know, like in the movie where two people go out and the movie, you know, the movie, you know, where two people, they go out into like, sort of like a fashionable part of town.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And you go to like various montage. Various change rooms and we do a funny montage. Exactly, yeah. Where, where, you know, I come out in a really big pair of trousers and she shakes her head. Then I come out in a really small pair of trousers and she shakes her head and then I've come out in a medium sized pair of big

[Matthew Crosby]

trousers and she goes, you come on. There's one where you come up with them. Like you've got your arms through them and you'. Confused.

[Ed Gamble]

Exactly. And we're laughing. I think it's going to be great. So basically the next time you see me, you're. You're barely going to recognize me. The only thing you're going to recognize is the head.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'm worried.

[Ed Gamble]

And the hands.

[Matthew Crosby]

Because fashion people spend money on clothes. I'm worried that I think you have very much have a budget ceiling that you're unwilling to spend on clothes.

[Ed Gamble]

I've told him. What? I've told you. My budget is £35 for. For an entire new wardrobe.

[Matthew Crosby]

Right.

[Ed Gamble]

And that includes buying the wardrobe as well. So. Already, already going to IKEA?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

It's 30 quid for the wardrobe.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

So it's £5.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's £5 for your whole wardrobe?

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, £5 for our wardrobe. What do you think? What do you think I'm looking at? You know, if I want to get a whole new look for me, you know, just say one outfit, would I be, would I be able to do it all under, say 50 quid?

[Matthew Crosby]

You could, but I wouldn't say that. It would be the highest quality stuff. I don't think that would last necessarily. You might look nice.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Sky's the limit with fashion, Matthew. Of course you can buy affordable things and look lovely.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

But I think.

[Ed Gamble]

Should I remortgage my house again?

[Matthew Crosby]

I think. I just think you so clearly don't have an idea that your Two ideas are 50 quid and remortgage your house.

[Ed Gamble]

I've got no clue.

[Matthew Crosby]

Somewhere in between.

[Ed Gamble]

I don't know. I don't know how much things cost.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I just. I've got. Literally, I. I so rarely buy clothes. I don't know. I always go, something's going to shops and go, well, that looks nice. Oh, no, that's. That's too expensive.

[Matthew Crosby]

And what's too expensive for you for

[Ed Gamble]

a seven quid Crunch and crumble radio.

[Matthew Crosby]

The Bucket Kings of Leon. That reminds me, I need to find my buckets. I've moved house recently, said gambler Matthew Crosby. By the way.

[Ed Gamble]

Hello.

[Matthew Crosby]

Moved house recently and I've packed my bucket somewhere. I can't find it.

[Ed Gamble]

Really. You can't find your bucket?

[Matthew Crosby]

Can't find my bucket.

[Ed Gamble]

That's typically the things you sort of pack and you think, oh, I really need. That are like the bottle opener or something like that. You know where you might.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, there was when we. The night we moved in, obviously. Piles of boxes everywhere.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

I did order a corkscrew on Deliveroo.

[Ed Gamble]

Did you?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I didn't know you could do that. You can order a corkscrew on Deliveroo.

[Matthew Crosby]

Get anything on Deliveroo these days, mate?

[Ed Gamble]

Can you?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, big time.

[Ed Gamble]

Can I get a pair of trousers on delivery?

[Matthew Crosby]

Probably.

[Ed Gamble]

That might be mine. I'm sorry. Stylist. If I can get them on Deliveroo.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

If I could. They wait while I try them on and then will they take them back?

[Matthew Crosby]

That's actually a really good idea for a service.

[Ed Gamble]

That's a fantastic idea for a service. We'll get to the moving disasters bit in a second. We're going to interrogate this idea. That's a really good idea.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Where somebody. Right, here's the thing.

[Catherine Bohart]

Thing.

[Ed Gamble]

They. They come to your house. They also have basic tailoring skills.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. So it needs to be taken up just a tiny bit.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

You know, taken up. Take it in. Any of those kind of things. Take it up, take it in. Let me begin to paraphrase House of Pain. If they. Yeah, that's great. But if you don't. If you. If you fundamentally don't like taking places. They take them away again.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

This is really.

[Matthew Crosby]

I mean, it's sort of a personal shopper at home.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

You go through the full wardrobe. You have, like, access to the Debenhams catalog or something.

[Ed Gamble]

Absolutely right. Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Click, click, click. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. They bring it all over in a big cube. They stay there while you try it on. They take it up if you need it, if you want it. They've got a bibber.

[Ed Gamble]

Yep.

[Matthew Crosby]

Buy, purchase, purchase that.

[Ed Gamble]

And if you don't want it, no harm, no foul, they pop it back on their bike and they cycle off.

[Matthew Crosby]

Or they put it on or they wear it.

[Ed Gamble]

If you don't want it, I'll have it. That's what the service is called.

[Matthew Crosby]

They arrive wearing it so you can see what it looks like on someone.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. Do you have to then order a Deliveroo driver who's the same. Same basic shape as you?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he has to be prepared to ride home naked. That's right, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

He arrives in one outfit.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

There's an added little thrill, isn't it? Well, no, no. Because if he has to go home naked, what you really want is exhibitionists. So they're incentivized to sell. To sell.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Because otherwise that's going to be a very shy salesman. So what you really need is.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, you don't want this.

[Ed Gamble]

No.

[Matthew Crosby]

You don't need pants, do you?

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no. I feel like I'd be better in this one. No.

[Matthew Crosby]

Or take the helmet as well.

[Ed Gamble]

That's. Well, depends if you take the pants or not. Yeah. That's a good idea, though, I think. Okay. Right, we've got a brand new business idea.

[Matthew Crosby]

This is great.

[Ed Gamble]

This is really, really good. This is finally going to make our fortune. We've got Catherine Bohart coming up on the show in just a little bit.

[Matthew Crosby]

See what Catherine thinks.

[Ed Gamble]

See what she thinks of it. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby on Radio X. Do you remember the High Street Honeys? Happy Sunday, everybody. Or, of course, Monday, if you're a CEO. It's Ed Gamble and it's Mat Crosby. We're with you till 11am Catherine Bohart just around the corner. But producer John has been producing during this show. It's very, very rare.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's odd. It's an odd feeling to have an actual producer in the room, to have

[Ed Gamble]

an actual competent producer doing some producing work. But you looked up trousers on Deliveroo during that last song. The first result was Screw Fix. They're a little bit out of your budget.

[Matthew Crosby]

Though, how much are they like? Are they like. So they're like protective work trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

I'd imagine these are real work trousers for real men. They're gonna last though, aren't they? That's the thing. You buy a pair of screw fix trousers. You never buy another pair of trousers in your life.

[Matthew Crosby]

You like walking around, just going to cafes and stuff. You look like a total blonker.

[Ed Gamble]

There is. And also I. Workwear is a fashion style.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. But not workwear like this, I'd imagine. I'd imagine this is like padded stuff. I'd imagine this is. It's not like. They're not like Carhartt trousers, are they?

[Ed Gamble]

They're Dewalt trousers.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. So they're like.

[Ed Gamble]

These aren't stylish.

[Matthew Crosby]

These aren't stylish work trousers. These are actual work trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

But the thing is.

[Matthew Crosby]

And you do not scream labourer, Matthew. I don't. No one's gonna think that guy's off to the site.

[Ed Gamble]

I did fix the fe the other day.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Very badly. But I did it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, there you go. Point proven.

[Ed Gamble]

I did it. Never. I did it. Nevertheless. So I'm sort of moving into my handyman era and I think my fashion needs to reflect that. I also think I'll get, you know, I think people will go, oh, didn't expect that of this guy. So I think it'll, it'll. It'll be a conversation. Also.

[Matthew Crosby]

They'll be pristine the whole time.

[Ed Gamble]

Always be.

[Matthew Crosby]

Really? Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

They'll be dank.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

But they'll be, they'll be freshly washed. How.

[Matthew Crosby]

How much are we talking for these Dewalts work trousers that you can get on Deliveroo.

[Ed Gamble]

These are about 45 pounds. Oh, Matthew, that's a bit too expensive for you. There's another shop which is selling trousers for £15. Yes. That's more my budget.

[Matthew Crosby]

Are they just more like fashion trousers?

[Ed Gamble]

They're cargoes. They've labeled them as work trousers.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

You've also got like a sort of pajama trouser checked. They look a bit like chef's trousers. Yeah. So basically I've got to be one of the Village People in order to buy trousers on deliver.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I've got to have a very recognizable job.

[Matthew Crosby]

Please don't wear the native American trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no. You simply can't anymore. You simply can't anymore. I've also got. I've got a bit of a beef with trousers generally as a season four of beef. Season four of beef trousers. I do resent the fact that if I'M buying a pair of trousers. As a small person, I'm paying the same as a big person is paying Big Tall Boy. Big Tall Boy is paying the same for his jeans as little Small Boy. Unless I'm buying them from Bas Baby Gap. Yeah, you know, which I occasionally. I do. I will. I will shop in the kids section occasionally for a T shirt or something like that.

[Matthew Crosby]

The problem is, if you go in there alone, it doesn't look great, does it? Because you're often going in there with no trousers on.

[Ed Gamble]

That's right. I go in there with no trousers.

[Matthew Crosby]

I need a pair of trousers.

[Ed Gamble]

Say dress me, Mummy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

And they absolutely hate it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Spit your dummy out.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm just. I'm just a baby. Which could. Could. Could Mummy. Could Mummy dress baby? And I'm banned from Westfield now. Yeah, yeah. No longer welcome. Anyway.

[Matthew Crosby]

Banned from life.

[Ed Gamble]

I should be banned from life. Yeah, yeah. Is just around the corner. I won't be talking to her about my adult baby preferences.

[Matthew Crosby]

I will.

[Ed Gamble]

Will you? Yeah. Okay. Let's find out what she thinks of that. Catherine Bohart is just around the corner. Stay tuned for her. Radio X.

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[Ed Gamble]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby. We are delighted to be joined by our first guest of the day. Our first scoop for Daddy.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, thank you.

[Ed Gamble]

It is, of course, thank you. All right, all right. Worth a try, wasn't it? But never, never worth a try. It's Catherine Bohart, the brilliant Kather Bohart. Hello, Catherine. How are you doing?

[Catherine Bohart]

Delighted.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's the morning.

[Catherine Bohart]

Delighted to be here.

[Matthew Crosby]

Hello.

[Catherine Bohart]

I'm good. I'm sorry, I'm still in shock about your hair. I love it, but I'm also.

[Ed Gamble]

Everyone loves my hair. Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

We've not. We've not actually mentioned it on the show so far, but Mattie's had a little haircut. Quite a big haircut, actually.

[Ed Gamble]

Quite a significant haircut. Yes. I didn't go to my usual. Usual person. I went to Rosie, who was fantastic. What a delight.

[Catherine Bohart]

Who's your usual person?

[Ed Gamble]

Jackson. Okay, Jackson. So. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Jackson.

[Matthew Crosby]

Jackson.

[Catherine Bohart]

Sorry.

[Ed Gamble]

My bad.

[Catherine Bohart]

I really apologize. Why are you crazy? If you're know the hair lore. But so Rosie thought we're doing something different.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. I said, just take a little bit off and she was like, it's almost all going off. I feel like a skinhead.

[Matthew Crosby]

No.

[Ed Gamble]

I feel like one of the Weetabix men.

[Matthew Crosby]

You've still got long hair, but it really suits you.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you think so?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. And also it stops you looking like every other man who works in production in television.

[Catherine Bohart]

I do agree with that. I'm sorry.

[Ed Gamble]

I agree with that. It's true. Everybody's still got that sort of post Covid look of a big beard and long hair.

[Matthew Crosby]

Every show that Matthew works on, there's someone who looks exactly like him on the show.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, true.

[Matthew Crosby]

I've got.

[Catherine Bohart]

Every show he works on, there's eight people who look like. So I've been to those recordings and you go, I'm gonna pick a man's name and I'm just gonna call everybody it. And it usually works.

[Matthew Crosby]

Nick, Tom or Matthew. Absolutely.

[Catherine Bohart]

He. Sometimes he's a Jack, sometimes he's a Jack.

[Matthew Crosby]

But Jack is unusual. You're right. Yeah, you're right.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes. But anyway, now I. Now I look very unique, very different. And it could be. It could be a new me. I'm also going to buy some trousers. So it's all happening in Crosby's world.

[Catherine Bohart]

Well, you're buying trousers.

[Matthew Crosby]

Matthew washed some TR and somehow he put stink into them, so he had to get rid of them.

[Catherine Bohart]

No. Is it your machine?

[Ed Gamble]

It's the machine, yeah. Yeah. The machine's got something in it, yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

Can I tell you, I don't think you'll be surprised to hear I'm a woman who watches people clean their washing machines online and then I actually do what they say because I love to learn how to get in there and clean it. And does it work so well, it turns out washing machines don't have to just last four years if you actually get in there, but you have to be willing to.

[Matthew Crosby]

Vinegar. Vinegar.

[Catherine Bohart]

It's part of it, yeah. Lemons.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's always vinegar.

[Catherine Bohart]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

So it's all sort of natural ingredients. Then you've got your vinegar, your lemon.

[Catherine Bohart]

You're against hardcore chemicals.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, really?

[Catherine Bohart]

Yeah. I appreciate that. That's not the modern move, but I do want every. Also, I just moved into a house where we bought the white goods off the previous owner. And so I was like, I need to eviscerate you from this property in a sort of, I guess, a very intense way.

[Ed Gamble]

So you actually enjoy cleaning washing machines?

[Catherine Bohart]

Is that what you're trying to feel strong? I certainly feel compelled to. Compulsively, yes.

[Ed Gamble]

Do you want to come around my house? It's basically the next question. I'd come around my house.

[Matthew Crosby]

Compulsion and enjoyment are necessarily within the same Venn diagram.

[Catherine Bohart]

Well, I guess both. I feel a relief after I've done it. Certainly I enjoy knowing it is clean.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes. Yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

Yes. And I love watching people do it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

Oh my God. I'm gonna send you some amazing videos and a particularly good gadget. I'll send you a link.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, please.

[Catherine Bohart]

You asked for none.

[Matthew Crosby]

I've just moved the first place I've lived with a full size dishwasher, so that is a daily joy.

[Ed Gamble]

It's got a walk in dishwasher.

[Matthew Crosby]

I've got a walk in dishwasher.

[Catherine Bohart]

I'm working with a half dishwasher at the moment.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, I've been there.

[Catherine Bohart]

It's actually, it's fine. There's only two of us. It discourages me from putting every single thing that I. Ellen says that my partner says that when I. If she like looks away from her glass, I'll put it in the dishwasher so she has to sort of keep it in her hand at all times.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes. I will finish my dinner and try and clear my wife's plate away while she's still eating.

[Catherine Bohart]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

That's because you love food, isn't it?

[Matthew Crosby]

We should talk about your tour, Catherine.

[Catherine Bohart]

Oh, yes, let's.

[Matthew Crosby]

Because you're doing another stand up comedy tour called Borrowing Trouble.

[Catherine Bohart]

I sure am. Borrowing Trouble is a phrase my dad uses an awful lot to describe, I guess my sort of anxiety and how I will borrow trouble from scenarios that haven't yet happened, but may well happen or could happen, but certainly aren't happening so as to ruin my present with the fear of Potential futures.

[Ed Gamble]

That stands for for future events appearing real.

[Matthew Crosby]

Are we playing that now? Yeah, we're not we playing Ian Brown.

[Ed Gamble]

We should be playing Ian Brown. Yeah, I don't play him anymore. But yeah, but, yeah, that's. But I know exactly that. That kind of catastrophizing thing of going, hey, this isn't happening, but what if it was? And let's worry about it now.

[Catherine Bohart]

It's exactly that. And it would be easier to take the advice to not borrow trouble from my father if he weren't such a Catholic. But it's like my guy.

[Ed Gamble]

Come on, come on.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's normally at night time for me. That's when that's when the borrowing trouble happens just before I fall asleep.

[Catherine Bohart]

Like Sunday scaries every night.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

Do you have a little. Do you do all the things, like write things down that you have to do in a notebook on your bedside so that you stop worrying about it?

[Matthew Crosby]

No, that's. Yeah. Okay.

[Catherine Bohart]

You just have a loud list beside you to go to sleep with.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. I don't think I, I sort of. I get the logic of, of writing everything down. I used to be a sort of real list maker, but then you're just like, well, now I know exactly what I've got to worry about.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Now I've got all of these life worries that I've got to. I'm sort of trying to solve right this second.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

It doesn't help at all.

[Catherine Bohart]

Also, if anything, as I turn the page to the second page of the list, I'm thinking, no one can do

[Ed Gamble]

this in a day. Got an A2 notepad. Ed Gamble and mother Matthew. Radio X,

[Matthew Crosby]

Sway on Radio X said gambler Matty Crosby with you until 11am and we're still delighted to be joined by. By the fantastic Catherine Bohart, who's new.

[Catherine Bohart]

What if she said suede, Difficult to clean.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, my God, what a nightmare. Yeah, you can't rub a lemon on that.

[Catherine Bohart]

No, no, you shouldn't, you mustn't.

[Matthew Crosby]

You've got to use protector spray before you take it out. You've got to use a protector spray. And if there's even a 2% chance of rain. I'm not wearing that jacket.

[Ed Gamble]

No way.

[Catherine Bohart]

Which means you're never wearing that jacket because we live in the uk.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

But, gosh, isn't it nice to look at in the wardrobe?

[Matthew Crosby]

I've got a lovely suede jacket hung in the wardrobe. I do.

[Catherine Bohart]

And indoors. Maybe you could wear it to an indoor if I event.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but then how'd you get there?

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I tell you what I do with my sw. I've got. I've got a gorgeous suede jacket, but you know how, like, Nana's will put the sort of laminate all over all their furniture. I wear one of those at the top. So I've got a completely clear packamac. I wear the top of my suede jacket. You're looking fantastic.

[Matthew Crosby]

You're completely laminated day today, aren't you? Apart from your nether regions.

[Ed Gamble]

That's right. I, I, I, I, I need those. Yeah. The crucial areas I need to get to. They're not laminated, but, yeah, completely laminated with the Doyle on each shoulder. That's how I like to operate.

[Catherine Bohart]

Oh, does anyone hear a squeak? Matthew's here.

[Ed Gamble]

You can hear me coming a mile off. So, yes, we should. We should do the promo as well. It's katherinebohart.com if you want to get tickets. You're going to be at the Soho Theatre from 21st September to 3rd October.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's a long run. At the Soho Theatre.

[Catherine Bohart]

Two weeks.

[Matthew Crosby]

Two weeks.

[Catherine Bohart]

It's nice to bed it in. I will also be before that at the Fringe doing a whip, figuring it out. But yes, the whole theatre would be delightful.

[Matthew Crosby]

And can I just say, I've seen Catherine do whips before and they are fully ready shows.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, of course. You're a prepper.

[Matthew Crosby]

The whip is a lie with Bohar.

[Catherine Bohart]

I like to be prepared. I like to be prepared and well practiced. And I like. I hate the idea of showing up when people spend that much money and it not being ready.

[Matthew Crosby]

But it's a whip. Well, you're like, I hear Char went up to the Fringe to do a whip and won the comedy award.

[Catherine Bohart]

I just. Oh, I've gotten caught.

[Matthew Crosby]

Total nerds.

[Catherine Bohart]

I panicked there and got caught on my own game.

[Matthew Crosby]

Did you see that?

[Catherine Bohart]

I was like, oh, no.

[Matthew Crosby]

And that's what people want to see, that sort of thing at the Whip. They don't want to see a ready show.

[Catherine Bohart]

They'll never see it. I just think they're taking an hour of their lives and at the Fringe, I mean, they could be anywhere else.

[Matthew Crosby]

There's some people who appreciate seeing the process. I might be going to the Fringe

[Catherine Bohart]

to do a whip and they can go see the Process.

[Matthew Crosby]

The process.

[Catherine Bohart]

That's true. I've seen you lately, you've got loads of.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, that's very good. Well, it's fine. But, you know, there will be a lot of. I don't have an hour, certainly, so there will be a lot of stumbling around in a room that's far too big for that.

[Ed Gamble]

Lot of going into the crowd. Crowd. You're really hoping for someone in a funny shirt, aren't you? Absolutely.

[Catherine Bohart]

Or with a weird job. Fingers crossed for a weird job.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. I love weird jobs.

[Ed Gamble]

Weird job, funny shirt is the absolute. That's the whole show.

[Matthew Crosby]

Massive head.

[Ed Gamble]

Big head. Yes, absolutely.

[Catherine Bohart]

I have such a big head, though, that it's hard for me to go there with people. Like, if I. If I'm opening Gambit, what a big head you have. They're usually like, same girl.

[Matthew Crosby]

So that's nice. That makes it better. I think she had a tiny Little head and said, what a massive head you have.

[Catherine Bohart]

You're right. It's actually peer to peer. Exactly. That's lovely.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. That is a big head.

[Ed Gamble]

Absolutely. Well, if you've got an absolutely massive head, go along to the Soho Theatre, sit in the front Row on the 21st of September through to the 3rd of October. You're also on tour across the UK October to November. Katherinebohart.com for tickets.

[Catherine Bohart]

And Ireland, I must clarify.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, yes.

[Ed Gamble]

UK and Ireland. Yes, indeed. The UK tour and Ireland tour.

[Catherine Bohart]

Please and thank you.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes. Katherine brohart.com we'd like to. I think this is a question I think you'll be able to answer, Katherine, what is something that shouldn't be embarrassing but yet is? Now, we. We ask this of a lot of our guests. There are certain things that you think it's not really embarrassing, but the more you do it, you think it kind of is. A good example we were given is people having their photograph taken in those photo booths. You know, you can see the little legs under the curtain.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

It's not embarrassing, but it is embarrassing.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

To have legs. No.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Just simply having legs.

[Matthew Crosby]

Having legs is an issue.

[Catherine Bohart]

And I think on a similar vein for me, falling over. Because everyone does do it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

Or. Or choking, like all things we like people do. If you have a human body and you walking on paths or like to eat food quickly, which I do, then at some point both of those things will happen. But it's still somehow absolutely mortifying to fall over. And I. I laugh. I never go, are you okay? Yeah, I always.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's funny.

[Catherine Bohart]

Yeah, it's so funny.

[Matthew Crosby]

I think I've lost my. As soon as I've turned 40, I've completely lost any feelings of embarrassment around that sort of Stu. Don't care. I was on the Tube the other day and something similar happened to Matthew the other week, where I realized the train was being diverted. But I had my headphones on. Loads of people were getting off and I was like, why are they getting off? Took my headphones off and then heard what it was. Tried to make it through the doors. The doors were shutting. I was trying to claw the doors apart. Wasn't working. Someone else was on the other side trying to do it. My foot was trapped. I was like. Then trying to drag my foot out to stay on the Tube. The foot came out, my headphones fell off the little cup thing and the headphones spun across the floor. Someone had to pick out for me. Finally did that, put the headphones on, the tube started I stumbled backwards. Not one single second of embarrassment.

[Catherine Bohart]

Are you joking? I feel physically sick for you.

[Matthew Crosby]

Don't care.

[Catherine Bohart]

Wow.

[Matthew Crosby]

Couldn't care less. And there was definitely someone on there who recognized me. I was like, great story for that guy.

[Catherine Bohart]

Oh, my God, that's.

[Ed Gamble]

Great story for you.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

What an incredible capacity to just withstand life. No, I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night thinking about a time that I fell over when I was 16.

[Ed Gamble]

16 is bad. 16's right in there.

[Catherine Bohart]

Devastating.

[Matthew Crosby]

But it's not, it's not. It's not affected you. Apart from.

[Catherine Bohart]

Well, it's 21 years later and I'm still losing sleep.

[Matthew Crosby]

But, you know, generally in your life. Matthew got his head stuck in the tube doors and his glasses popped off. How about that?

[Ed Gamble]

My glasses popped off and the tube carried on. Let's go back to the station, picked up the glasses, put them on, got back on the tube, realized the lenses had popped out to go back to the tube station again. It was. Yeah, but you know what?

[Matthew Crosby]

The other night in my kitchen, I was trying to cut a tomato, my knife wasn't sharp enough and I thought, I'm so embarrassed. No one else there.

[Catherine Bohart]

Okay.

[Ed Gamble]

No.

[Catherine Bohart]

That is pretty embarrassing, especially for you. That's off brand.

[Matthew Crosby]

I bought a new sharpener. Don't worry.

[Catherine Bohart]

Good man.

[Ed Gamble]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby, Radio X Lover.

[Matthew Crosby]

Still joined by the fantastic Catherine Bohart, who is on tour. Borrowing trouble. UK and Ireland tour and a big run at the Soho Theatre, 21st of September to 3rd of October. Katherinebohart.com for tickets and also work in progress at the Edinburgh Fringe, which will not be ready. Ready. It'll be crazy. You'll be all over the place.

[Catherine Bohart]

It'll be mad. I might even have one piece of paper up there.

[Matthew Crosby]

Catherine, we've got loads of questions here that we. We always ask our guests, Matthew, which one do you want to go for? Do you want to give. Give Catherine one of the hot questions on radio?

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I think the answer. I think I know what the answer is going to be to this, but have you ever eaten a chupa Chup from the bogs? You know, if you go into the. The, you know, if you go into a toilet.

[Catherine Bohart]

It took me so long to translate two parts of that.

[Ed Gamble]

I was like, yeah, from the toilet. Toilets.

[Catherine Bohart]

Oh, no. What, what do you mean? Is he just lying there?

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, not just lie. Not just lying there, no, more like if you go in and there is a person there who will help you with washing your hands or spray you with a little bit. No, no, no, I don't need help with.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, Matthew takes his mummy.

[Catherine Bohart]

It does sound like your mummy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, there will be a. Have you. Have you been to a club where there is a. There's a person there who is.

[Matthew Crosby]

Fragrances.

[Ed Gamble]

Fragrances, They've got a little dish where you're supposed to put in, and they will often squirt the soap onto your hands for you.

[Catherine Bohart]

When I was in university. Yeah, I remember.

[Ed Gamble]

And they have. They have chupa chups with them.

[Grainger Announcer]

Right.

[Ed Gamble]

And they. Then they say, would you like to, you know, if you put. If you put your pound coin down. They also say, go and take a chupa.

[Catherine Bohart]

It's a question if I've ever done class A drug.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, no, no, no, no. Have you taken a lolly from the person in the toilets in a nightclub?

[Catherine Bohart]

Nope.

[Ed Gamble]

Would you like to.

[Matthew Crosby]

They will often say something obscene.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes. A little rude rhyme. Yeah, they'll often do a little rude rhyme to. To suggest that if you're.

[Catherine Bohart]

It's just a men's loo thing, I think.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, no, we've had confirmation from the ladies as well.

[Catherine Bohart]

No, in the ladies, they're always just totting at how long everybody takes.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, really?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Are they like, come and hurry it up, hurry up.

[Matthew Crosby]

I don't know. I think maybe they took one look at you and thought, put the chupa chups away and don't say anything naughty.

[Catherine Bohart]

Maybe that's right.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

The prefect here.

[Catherine Bohart]

Hand sanitizer, Mom.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, because you're in there with the lemon and vinegar trying to clean the toilets.

[Catherine Bohart]

Oh, my God, I bet you those toilets are so gross. I'd love to clean them. Yeah, but in the. In the daylight, you. There's never gonna be daylight in there. You'd want to.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, yeah, I think. I don't know, the idea of just getting down on my hands and knees. I mean, I've only got, you know, two pairs of trousers. I can't imagine I would get down my hands and knees in a toilet to scrub those toilets and not have to throw in my trousers.

[Catherine Bohart]

You could use your stanky pair, though.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's true.

[Catherine Bohart]

You know, put them to good use.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, but then how am I gonna know when the toilets are clean? I'm like, there's still an awful smell and it'll be coming from me.

[Catherine Bohart]

Listen, I just. You know, aside from the horror of them having been in that bathroom and them coming from a person who. I don't know, From a place. I don't know. My thing with lollipops is I Like it for two minutes, maybe.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. And they do last.

[Catherine Bohart]

Then you just like.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Catherine Bohart]

Anyone.

[Matthew Crosby]

Eventually. No, no, No, I don't like.

[Ed Gamble]

They make a teeth sort of firm, don't they?

[Matthew Crosby]

Who's sucking them until they're finished?

[Catherine Bohart]

Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Right. Eventually you get bored enough to crunch.

[Ed Gamble]

You gotta crunch. You gotta crunch.

[Matthew Crosby]

And I don't wanna crunch.

[Catherine Bohart]

They're stuck in there. Also, I do just think there's something very eerie about adults and lollipops, do

[Ed Gamble]

you know, I think unless you're Kojak, it's really. It's not. Yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

It screams oral f. Fixation.

[Ed Gamble]

It screams. Or a fixation. I once had an Everlasting Gobstopper. I once bought an Everlasting Gobstopper.

[Matthew Crosby]

You still have it?

[Catherine Bohart]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, I had to chuck it away.

[Catherine Bohart]

Huh.

[Ed Gamble]

I just couldn't. I was. I kept it in the fridge and every day I just. After school I just like, lick it until it had like one flat side. But I just. I was.

[Matthew Crosby]

You weren't licking it all the way around. You were licking it flat on the whole time.

[Ed Gamble]

I was holding it in my hand,

[Catherine Bohart]

like, practicing for good morning.

[Ed Gamble]

My wife's very lucky. Anyway. I've got a sandpaper tongue there like a cat.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, it's all flat down one side.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Anyway, Catherine Bohart is on tour. She'll be up at the Edinburgh Festival with a whip. And she'll be at the Soho Theatre from 21st September to 3rd October, then a UK and Ireland tour from October to November. Catherinebohart.com for tickets. Catherine, it's been a delight to see you.

[Grainger Announcer]

Thanks, James.

[Ed Gamble]

You're welcome. Round the flat anytime. To clean the washing machine.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes.

[Catherine Bohart]

No, thanks.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. Don't ask, don't get.

[Matthew Crosby]

Radio X. Oh, look at that. Weather. Gorgeous weather. Barbecue breakfast for me, I think. Tis the weather.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh.

[Matthew Crosby]

I need some sort of summer tunes to be blasting out across my new neighborhood. Let people know what I'm about. That I'm a party boy ready for summer. Let's have a little something from this band. Hmm. Gigan. Summer. Summer. Summer Day.

[Ed Gamble]

Not summery. It sounds like it was recorded inside a bin.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Is that. Is that a positive.

[Matthew Crosby]

Lovely.

[Ed Gamble]

That's really. That's really unpleasant stuff. And I think you're an absolute scourge on the neighborhood if you play that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Thank you.

[Ed Gamble]

Even if you. I think even if you play that in headphones inside your house with the curtains drawn, you're a scourge on the neighborhood.

[Matthew Crosby]

On mute.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. Even on mute.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, exactly.

[Matthew Crosby]

Radio X.

[Grainger Announcer]

When you manage procurement for multiple facilities, every order matters. But when it's for a hospital system, they matter even more. Grainger gets it and knows there's no time for managing multiple suppliers and no room for shipping delays. That's why Grainger offers millions of products in fast, dependable delivery so you can keep your facility stocked, safe and running smoothly. Call 1-800-GRAINGER Click grainger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done.

[Ed Gamble]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby. Yes, indeed. Welcome back to the show. It's the final hour of the Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby radio show on Radio X. Very exciting hour. We're going to be doing Metal Education. I've got my fingers crossed I'm going to do well this week. I've never done it well, well, ever.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, no, no.

[Ed Gamble]

But this week could be. You've got to keep trying at these things. Got to keep. Got to keep knocking on the door, haven't you? We're also going to do what?

[Matthew Crosby]

What?

[Ed Gamble]

It wasn't supposed to be a Matthew's Big Thing.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

But we got a very good message in from a guy called Tom and

[Matthew Crosby]

you take so long to build it up because we.

[Ed Gamble]

We teased it in the first hour. We didn't have time because we had Catherine in the second hour. But now it's going to be a Matthew's Big Thing. So do you want to do.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, yeah. Matthew's Big Thing. John, I don't know if you know, we. I say Matthew's Big Thing. We do a sort of cool like sound effecty thing for it to make

[Ed Gamble]

it seem massive on Ed's voice. We treat Ed's voice with like a kind of.

[Matthew Crosby]

So if you get ready to do that. Ready. Matthew's Big Thing.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. I like that one actually.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, we'll stick with that.

[Ed Gamble]

One actually works better for us.

[Matthew Crosby]

We'll stick with that. I think we should all be talking like that all of the time.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, absolutely. So that is coming up in just a little bit. But first it is of course Maximo park with R Velocity here on Radio X. Radio X. Now it's time for Metal Education Radio from a Lacerin disguise radio.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes, this is the feature slash quiz where I give Matthew a list of things from a category.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes.

[Matthew Crosby]

And you work out if they're real or fake or not. Not traditionally your highlight on the show.

[Ed Gamble]

Well, it depends what you mean by highlight.

[Matthew Crosby]

Content wise it's a highlight but not success wise for you.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, no, I'm not very good at it.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, you're not very good at it,

[Ed Gamble]

but I have a lovely time doing it. So here we go.

[Matthew Crosby]

John's. You will hear it's a wonderful return for a metal education topic.

[Ed Gamble]

Matthew, is it?

[Matthew Crosby]

Hope you're well. Feels like it's time to bring back the increasingly sporadic feature. John Nettles education.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, I like this. Yeah, I remember this.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's part four, Matthew. It's eight Midsummer Murders titles with a quick synopsis.

[Ed Gamble]

Great.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay, you ready?

[Ed Gamble]

Yes.

[Matthew Crosby]

Here we go.

[Ed Gamble]

Thank you, John, for this part.

[Matthew Crosby]

Let's start with count your blessings. Okay.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay.

[Matthew Crosby]

Eyebrows are raised when the reclusive Count Ted Amblethorpe extends a rare invitation to the local old people's home to visit his country estate in the hamlet of Little Village Vinay. But when the elderly Matthias Mosby collapses upon seeing the Count's genital themed greenhouse, questions are raised if foul play is afoot.

[Ed Gamble]

Okay. Is that real? Is that fake? Number one, penis flytrap.

[Matthew Crosby]

Thank you.

[Ed Gamble]

Slightly cryptic penis fly trap, but I like it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, but we all, we all saw where it was going in the end. Number two. Boys will be boys.

[Ed Gamble]

Boys will be boys.

[Matthew Crosby]

And that's a wonderful song. Boys. Oh, boys will be boys Boys will

[Ed Gamble]

be boys as in floating in the

[Matthew Crosby]

water Boys will be boys and you'll see why. Eccentric widow Molly Edge, the only female competitor at the annual model boating competition of Upper Mildren, dies after being electrocuted by her boat's remote control. The day before the event, the chairman of the boating club, Jeff Hibbert, invites Barnaby to investigate, where he soon discovers the jealousies and rivalries that run deep within the club. Buoys will be buoys.

[Ed Gamble]

Very believable. Buoys will be buoys. Okay.

[Matthew Crosby]

Death Strikes three. On the night following his engagement party, Brad Furbank is murdered at Godley Manor. Pecked to death by a booby trapped cuckoo clock. His fiance, Francesca Bruce, informs DCI Barnaby that Brad was living at the village pub and made his living trading bitcoin.

[Ed Gamble]

Bitcoin and cuckoo clocks.

[Matthew Crosby]

And a murderous cuckoo.

[Ed Gamble]

Old world and new world colliding in midsummer. Could it be? Could it be true?

[Matthew Crosby]

Lawn of the Dead. Wilfred Worrell, groundsman and referee for the Midsummer Deverell Lawn Bowling Club, is found murdered the day after a friendly match turned into a full blown argument when Wilfred is accused of wrongly appointing the win to veteran bowls champion Archie Pollock.

[Ed Gamble]

Can I have that name again?

[Matthew Crosby]

Archie Pollock.

[Ed Gamble]

Archie Pollock. Okay. Yep, I think I've got an idea for that one. That's the first one so far I feel confident about.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay. A Clockwork Porridge. Confusion sweeps the town of Upper Walden when local lothario David Crofts is found dead at the windmill of Westmead Farm, having seemingly been drowned in oats during working hours. Barnaby and Troy must piece together the seemingly impossible timeline of events to solve the case. A Clockwork Porridge.

[Ed Gamble]

It's a very clever title if it is A Clockwork porridge.

[Matthew Crosby]

Sleeping with the fishes when adulterous doctor and keen fisherman Dr. Tony Asbridge. Ash Ashbridge. Not as Bridge.

[Ed Gamble]

Wait, it's Ashbridge.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, it's Ashbridge. I'm not referring to that. Perineum.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, of course.

[Matthew Crosby]

Disappears in the lake of Midsummer Walden. Rumors spread of a giant underwater monster being responsible, but a few days later, the body turns up under the ice of a display counter at Midsummer Langley. Fishmongers Wild Harvest. When the body of farmer Martin Strickland is found in woodland, it transpires that he was covered in truffle oil and mauled to death by a wild boar. Strickland's wife Camilla said he had gone out in the night because there had recently been a theft of truffles valued at £10,000, and also claims he recently fell out with local celebrity chef Ruth Cameron.

[Ed Gamble]

Is this the second Strickland we've had? It feels like Martin Strickland died twice in this quiz.

[Matthew Crosby]

Send in the clowns. Terry Bellini, AKA Groucho the Clown, is shot dead while performing, having earlier informed everyone that he had been offered another role as a rival circus. Things get worse when Curtis Ferebee, brother of the ringmaster Joe Ferebee, who wanted to get rid of circus completely, is found murdered at his own abattoir. But the circus lives on.

[Ed Gamble]

The fact that some of these are real has made me realize I've gotta get back to watching this summer because, you know, I watched a couple of episodes as a joke when we did the last Nettles Education and I was completely hooked. Completely hooked. And why wouldn't you be with us?

[Matthew Crosby]

Thank you for sending those in, John. We'll have the answers just after Royal

[Ed Gamble]

Blood Mask, you crobly. And Radio Ed. Radio X. I don't know Radio from a Lazarus Guy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Radio X, that's right. A little bit earlier on, I gave Matthew eight Midsummer Murders titles and synopses as sent in by John. And some of them are real, some of them are fake. Matthew is now going to tell me which he thinks are real, which he thinks are fake. It's a possible eight answers, Matthew.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay, here we go. Eight points. Here we go. Count your Blessings. That was the elderly Matthias Mosby collapsing upon seeing a genital themed greenhouse. And foul play is afoot. Penis fly trap.

[Ed Gamble]

Sadly, I believe that is fake.

[Matthew Crosby]

Number one, Fenis Plytrap.

[Ed Gamble]

Number one, penis fly trap.

[Matthew Crosby]

That is fake, Matthew. Well done. Boys will be boys. This is the boating competition. Someone being electrocuted by the remote control and jealousies and rivalries that run deep within the boating.

[Ed Gamble]

I believe that to be real.

[Matthew Crosby]

That is fake. So we're off to a bad start.

[Ed Gamble]

It's a bad start there. Bad start.

[Matthew Crosby]

Death Strikes three. This is Brad Furbank being pecked to death by a booby trapped cuckoo clock. And he was living in the village pub trading bitcoin.

[Ed Gamble]

The bitcoin is the bit I don't believe I'm gonna say that's fake.

[Matthew Crosby]

But you believe the peck to death by.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's pure Midsummer. Yeah, but I think bitcoin's not real.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay, it is real, Matthew.

[Ed Gamble]

There we go. Didn't do very well on that one, did. No, completely wrong.

[Matthew Crosby]

So one out of three so far. One out of three.

[Ed Gamble]

And it's the one that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. Is always fake. Yeah. Lawn of the Dead. This is the bowls club. The groundskeeper is found dead.

[Ed Gamble]

I believe that to be real.

[Matthew Crosby]

That is real, Matthew. There we go. Okay, this is how we play a clockwork porridge. This is of course David Crofts was found dead in oats.

[Ed Gamble]

I think that is fake.

[Matthew Crosby]

That is fake, Matthew. Yes. Although if you do write for Midsummer Murders and you're listening, you can just take that wholesale.

[Ed Gamble]

Clock porridge is fantastic.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. Sleeping with the Fishes. This is a doctor disappearing in a lake and then turning up under the ice of the display counter of Midsummer Langley Fishmongers.

[Ed Gamble]

I think that's real.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, it's fake. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Ed Gamble]

Nevermind, nevermind. It was one or the other, wasn't it? Yeah, it was one or the other. So I don't feel too bad.

[Matthew Crosby]

Wild Harvest.

[Ed Gamble]

I was almost right in a way. If I'd said the other answer, I would have been right.

[Matthew Crosby]

Wild Harvest. This is the body of a farmer being covered in truffle oil and mauled to death by a wild boar.

[Ed Gamble]

I think that's fake.

[Matthew Crosby]

No, that's real.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, no. I've got to start watching this show

[Matthew Crosby]

and finally send in the clowns. This is the clown that's been killed because he's talking about moving to a rival circus.

[Ed Gamble]

That's real.

[Matthew Crosby]

That is real, Matthew. How many did you get?

[Ed Gamble]

I think I got four.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's. Well, you Got three. Because we don't even count.

[Ed Gamble]

I got three.

[Matthew Crosby]

That's real bad, Matthew.

[Ed Gamble]

That's really bad. I'm getting worse at this game. How is that the case? Because I just. My brain's dying a bit.

[Matthew Crosby]

Cognitive decline.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, that's what it is, isn't it? It's a real shame. Radio X, Dead Boy and Soupy Ghost. The Verve.

[Matthew Crosby]

Wow, that's good, John. You can do all loads of sound effects, can't you, on the microphone.

[Ed Gamble]

I did the voice without even realizing it.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, the Verve. The Verve. We should do Matthew's big thing now. Because we should. It's nearly the end of the show. We've still not done this email that you mentioned in the first. Probably the first link.

[Ed Gamble]

I think it might have been the first link. It's very good. Yeah, it's a very good email.

[Matthew Crosby]

Okay, you ready? I'm gonna do the intro for you.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah, yeah.

[Matthew Crosby]

Matthew's big thing.

[Ed Gamble]

So this is a lovely message we've had in from Tom about moving disasters. Yeah, that was good. By the way, the little chuckle as well. Tom writes. Hello, lads. A few years ago my girlfriend and I bought.

[Matthew Crosby]

Don't mind if I do.

[Ed Gamble]

Don't mind if I do. But we bought our first flat together. Congratulations on the day. Congratulations to them. In the day we moved in, we arrived to find our sitting room wall dripping with some sort of wet, viscous gunk, like pale pink ectoplasm.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, my God. Ghostbusters.

[Ed Gamble]

It's very Ghostbusters. I desperately started trying to mop it up while my girlfriend ran upstairs to see whether it was coming from another flat. A few minutes later she came back looking shell shocked. It turned out our upstairs neighbor was giving birth.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, my God.

[Ed Gamble]

I told you it was worth waiting for. Didn't I tell you it was worth waiting for? Our upstairs neighbor was giving birth and that our flat was being slowly flooded with water and amniotic fluid leaking from her birthing pool. Love.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, my God.

[Ed Gamble]

I tell you what, we couldn't have done that in the first hour. There was no show left. Tom, that was absolutely amazing.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, I mean, and the day they moved in as well.

[Ed Gamble]

They moved in pouring down the water walls.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, my God. Womb slop.

[Ed Gamble]

Woom slop.

[Matthew Crosby]

Playing them next week for Mattal Uncle.

[Ed Gamble]

Can't wait to hear them. But yeah, thank you, Tom. If you would like to send an email into us sundayadiox.co.uk but the bar is very high. The bar is very, very high. Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby. Vroom. Broom and honk Honk.

[Matthew Crosby]

Ed Gambler Matthew Crosby saying goodbye for another week.

[Ed Gamble]

Yes, indeed. Goodbye, everybody. It's been an absolute delight to broadcast for you. Huge thanks to Catherine Bohart.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yes, thank you for coming in, Catherine.

[Ed Gamble]

She's gone now, but.

[Matthew Crosby]

Oh, yeah, bye. Oh, bye. Rude.

[Ed Gamble]

So rude. I'm so sorry. I would have assumed she'd just sit there in silence for the last hour of the show.

[Matthew Crosby]

Unbelievable.

[Ed Gamble]

Let's discuss these modern comedians. You know, if you'd booked a Jimmy Tarbach, he would have sat there like a good boy and he would have

[Matthew Crosby]

been here before we arrived.

[Ed Gamble]

He would have been here. He would have been broadcasting for us. Yeah. If you do get a chance to go and see Katherine, then you should absolutely take it.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's one of the best.

[Ed Gamble]

One of the best. Thank you very much to producer John. Thank you very much, John.

[Matthew Crosby]

John's here with us next week as well, of course.

[Ed Gamble]

Of course. Covering for Vin while he goes off and does his crazy world tour.

[Matthew Crosby]

Cheeky little dark tourism.

[Ed Gamble]

Cheeky little dark tour. But, yes. But also, most of all, thanks to you, the listener. We will be back next week, 8am on a Sunday. Or you can get the podcast for even more stuff. See you very soon.

[Matthew Crosby]

Stick around for Big DW by suits

[Ed Gamble]

from a mushy Shepherd's Bush Bush

[Matthew Crosby]

no

[Ed Gamble]

Income Tax Radio X.

[Grainger Announcer]

When you manage procurement for multiple facilities, every order matters. But when it's for a hospital system, they matter even more. Grainger gets it and knows there's no time for managing multiple suppliers and no room for shipping delays. That's why Grainger offers millions of products in fast, dependable delivery, so you can keep your facility stocked, safe and running smoothly. Call 1-800-GRAINGER click granger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done.

[Ed Gamble]

Ed Gamble and Matthew Crosby.

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, there we are.

[Ed Gamble]

There we are.

[Matthew Crosby]

All done.

[Ed Gamble]

Can I tell you I've got a Beck wreck, though.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, cool.

[Ed Gamble]

Got an actual Beck wreck. I'm listening to a podcast that is total trash at the moment and I'm loving it. And it is called Love Trap.

[Matthew Crosby]

It's emblematic.

[Ed Gamble]

No, no, this is actually. This. This. The episodes of this are long. It's called Love Trapped and it is about a. It's about the most hated ever contestant on the Bachelor who then got entrapped by a woman. You know, she was claiming she was pregnant with his baby. It couldn't be more trashy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, you don't really sell that to me anymore, Matthew.

[Ed Gamble]

I'm loving it.

[Matthew Crosby]

I'll be listening to that. I've been listening to Mariana in Conspiracy Land.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, I really like that.

[Matthew Crosby]

Really good.

[Ed Gamble]

She's got another podcast as well, which is called, Let me tell you, which is really, really, really fantastic. It's called Top Comment.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, that's what Mariana and Conspiracy lands on.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, is that what it is now?

[Matthew Crosby]

It's part of that, yes.

[Ed Gamble]

Top Comment is fantastic. It's brilliant.

[Matthew Crosby]

So, yeah, we don't have the Internet in our house yet, so I've been watching normal telly.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, my God. What are you watching?

[Matthew Crosby]

Well, I've been occasionally catching up with Married and Married at first sight. Australia, of course. Awful. Not a recommendation.

[Ed Gamble]

I mean, that is trash.

[Matthew Crosby]

Some of the worst people on the planet.

[Ed Gamble]

Awful people.

[Matthew Crosby]

And I watched the documentary about the Salisbury poisonings last night.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, really?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, really good.

[Ed Gamble]

And what do you think? Do you think they were just going to look at a big spire? Yeah, I think they were.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

I believe them.

[Matthew Crosby]

I think it was food poisoning.

[Ed Gamble]

Yeah. And John, what have you been watching and listening to? I have recently gotten a Sky subscription and I've mainly been using it to watch. Nothing to declare. Nothing to declare. The show is on, like, constantly.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

It's just never not off the telly. Yep. There are certain channels that just show that. Yeah, why not?

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah, why not? I think an Escape to the sun channel. And RTV keeps coming onto a channel that has action movies 24 hours a day.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, fun.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Pinned as my top channel on Sky.

[Matthew Crosby]

Go on.

[Ed Gamble]

Homes under the hammer 24 7.

[Matthew Crosby]

Fantastic.

[Ed Gamble]

You're a fantastic Saturday.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

But you know what? Very happy.

[Matthew Crosby]

Pinned. You've pinned it.

[Ed Gamble]

You've pinned it. You don't want to lose that. Yeah, I'm so happy. You don't want to lose that. You don't always a second of time. You don't want to get RSI scrolling Channel.

[Matthew Crosby]

That would just disappear as well.

[Ed Gamble]

Oh, yeah, that'll be moving all over the place.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah.

[Ed Gamble]

Constant. Well, constantly. Right, Have a wonderful week, everybody.

[Matthew Crosby]

Yeah. We've got to do another one.

[Ed Gamble]

We've got to do another one. Toby Tarrant's on the show next week.

[Matthew Crosby]

Bye.

[Ed Gamble]

Bye. Gray D O X.

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