Drew Kissed Bella Hadid

Summary

Emergency Intercom: Episode 51 - "Drew Kissed Bella Hadid"

Hosts: Enya Umanzor and Drew Phillips
Release Date: July 1, 2022

Emergency Intercom, a comedic venture by Enya Umanzor and Drew Phillips under the iHeartPodcasts banner, delves into the hilariously chaotic aspects of everyday life. In Episode 51, titled "Drew Kissed Bella Hadid," the hosts navigate through a myriad of topics ranging from social media antics to gauche airplane encounters, all intertwined with their trademark humor and candid conversations.

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1. Social Media Verification Wars

The episode kicks off with a light-hearted debate about the ease of obtaining verified accounts on social platforms. Drew quips, “It's just really easy to get verified nowadays” (00:25) while Enya counters by implying that Drew might not be "cool enough" to secure verification, leading to playful banter about each other's social cred.

Notable Quote:

Drew Phillips ([00:40]): "If you want to take me saying that as saying you're literally one of the most uncool people I've ever met in my life..."

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2. The Subway Sandwich Saga

A significant portion of the conversation revolves around Enya’s questionable Subway sandwich, which has been described as having a “soggy bottom” and an unpleasant odor. Drew humorously criticizes the sandwich’s condition, leading to a discussion about unconventional food pairings and beverage preferences.

Notable Quote:

Enya ([02:18]): "If you weren't sick, now you're sick."

Drew Phillips ([03:28]): "I would never drink it again, but for the novelty... it gets a solid 7.8 from me."

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3. Drew’s Run-In with Bella Hadid

The centerpiece of the episode is Drew’s unexpected and humorous encounter with supermodel Bella Hadid. Enya shares her tarot card reading predicting an encounter with Bella, which Drew fulfills by meeting and kissing her in what initially seemed like a high-stakes social event. The conversation touches on the awkwardness of celebrity interactions and the candid revelations from Bella herself.

Notable Quote:

Enya ([04:24]): "Do you think you loved her more than your family?"

Drew Phillips ([05:37]): "She was like, 'I really wish it was you instead.'"

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4. Awkward Airplane Experiences

Enya and Drew recount their most embarrassing moments on flights, including accidental entrances into bathrooms and uncomfortable encounters with fellow passengers. These stories are relayed with comedic flair, highlighting the universal anxiety associated with air travel.

Notable Quote:

Enya ([21:08]): "I love being called honey and buddy."

Drew Phillips ([23:02]): "I was the girl on the plane to Portugal... just laughed it off."

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5. Nostalgia for School Days

The duo reminisces about their school experiences, particularly focusing on state testing and wardrobe mishaps. Enya shares a childhood story about wearing her sister’s flashy "Miss Me" jeans to a test, leading to a discussion about teenage anxiety and identity.

Notable Quote:

Enya ([26:05]): "When I wore those jeans, I was really mortified."

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6. Beverage Preferences and Culinary Disasters

A humorous exchange about favorite drinks leads to a broader conversation about Starbucks, McDonald's frappes, and whipped cream preferences. They also touch upon their lack of culinary skills, debating the merits of cooking versus ordering takeout.

Notable Quote:

Drew Phillips ([45:00]): "I wish I was a cooking girl like Maddie Bragg."

Enya ([46:59]): "I will never cook. I'll order Postmates forever."

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7. Managing Anxiety and Social Interactions

Towards the end of the episode, Enya discusses her anxiety related to public performances, contrasting Drew's adrenaline-fueled excitement. They explore the different ways they handle nervousness and the impact it has on their social lives.

Notable Quote:

Enya ([48:44]): "I have such a fright. Stage fright is crazy."

Drew Phillips ([48:37]): "I feel like life is awesome right now."

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8. Upcoming Projects and Personal Updates

The hosts wrap up the episode by teasing future content, including a movie episode and new merchandise launch. They also share snippets of their personal lives, such as Drew’s gaming misadventures and Enya’s reflections on past relationships.

Notable Quote:

Drew Phillips ([52:11]): "I bombed at Quip Lash. It was awful."

Enya ([53:33]): "Merch coming out on the 9th."

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Conclusion

Episode 51 of Emergency Intercom masterfully blends personal anecdotes with sharp humor, offering listeners a glimpse into the hosts' lives filled with quirky mishaps and candid confessions. Whether discussing the trivialities of social media verification or the intense experience of kissing a celebrity, Enya and Drew maintain a relatable and engaging dialogue that keeps the audience entertained from start to finish.

Notable Closing Quote:

Drew Phillips ([53:43]): "Thank you guys so much for listening and watching and loving and learning and slang."

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Timestamps Overview:

• [00:15] - Social media verification discussion begins
• [02:18] - Subway sandwich conversation
• [04:24] - Introduction to Drew’s encounter with Bella Hadid
• [21:08] - Airplane bathroom anecdote
• [26:05] - School days nostalgia
• [45:00] - Beverage preferences
• [48:44] - Anxiety and stage fright
• [52:11] - Upcoming projects and personal updates

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Emergency Intercom continues to deliver its unique blend of humor and real-talk, making Episode 51 a must-listen for fans eager to hear more about Drew’s brush with celebrity fame and the duo's everyday adventures.

Transcript

[Drew Phillips]

Get off your phone and do your job. Challenge.

[Andrew]

There was, like, hella verified accounts. Would you say that?

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, it's just really easy to get verified nowadays, though. So it's like. Like, they ref.

[Andrew]

To verify me.

[Drew Phillips]

No, it's like, if you're, like, just a little cool. So once you get to that.

[Andrew]

No, that. That's not helping me. You're calling me, like, not cool enough to be verified.

[Drew Phillips]

I. Like, honestly, Drew, if you want to take it that way, like, words are up for interpretation. If you want to take me saying that as saying you're literally one of the most uncool people I've ever met in my life, and sometimes it hurts to be around you. Like, take it like that.

[Andrew]

Oh, my God.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, if that's. If that's what helps you see.

[Andrew]

My God. We're off to. To crazy start this episode.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh, were we recording?

[Andrew]

Yes, we were recording.

[Drew Phillips]

Hi. Welcome to this episode. Oh, my God.

[Andrew]

Welcome, welcome. Welcome back to Emergency intercom. This is episode 51.

[Drew Phillips]

Your fucking subway sandwich stinks.

[Andrew]

So I have the petite grain to mask the odor.

[Drew Phillips]

It's raw on the fucking cabinet.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I got this, like, two days ago, and I was saying before the podcast that I'm, like, really fucking, like, starving. Like, I'm malnourished right now. And I was like, should I eat this? But it's literally giving soggy bottom. Rusty soggy bottom. Can you feel it? I don't like that it's getting, like, soggy bottom.

[Drew Phillips]

It's literally defrosting. So the scent of it. I know it tastes good, though. That's the thing is. I know.

[Andrew]

Crazy to wash it all down. I got the Mountain Dew flaming hot Cheeto version.

[Drew Phillips]

I hate that. It's, like, lime infused, too. Like, they have a lime on the bottom.

[Andrew]

I hate that. It's, like, gorgeous.

[Drew Phillips]

I'm sorry. This is targeted to Latins because they did not have to put the lime on the bottle. The lime and hot Cheetos. That's a Latin sleigh.

[Andrew]

This is, like, the most beautiful label I've ever seen.

[Drew Phillips]

I will say it is really pretty, but it looks like a drink you would only get at, like, the exotic snack shops that are specifically made for.

[Andrew]

People who are high in making to make lean. Like, mix your exotic soda with. It's kind of crazy, actually. This is weird.

[Drew Phillips]

How does it taste?

[Andrew]

It tastes really good, but then it has, like, a little spicy.

[Drew Phillips]

You have Subway in your fucking mustache.

[Andrew]

I know. I was leaving there on purpose. Damn. Fuck y' all. Y' all saw it in My mustache.

[Drew Phillips]

And y' all didn't say I just peed.

[Andrew]

Literally. This is, like, why I don't surround myself with people who fuck with me. Like, don't with me because, like, they are praying for my downfall. They want me to be embarrassed.

[Drew Phillips]

Okay. This label is actually fucking awesome. Like, on a graphic design level, it's actually so lit.

[Andrew]

It's really cool.

[Drew Phillips]

It has a caution label with a lemon on fire on it.

[Andrew]

A Lebanon fire.

[Drew Phillips]

That is good as bones.

[Andrew]

I know. And then wait for the spicy kick. Girl, if you weren't sick, now you're sick.

[Drew Phillips]

This is not spicy. I'm sorry.

[Andrew]

No, there's like a little kick at the end. It's not spicy. But just wait. Unless it's from my Subway sandwich, it's.

[Drew Phillips]

Maybe your Subway sandwich mixing in there.

[Andrew]

Oh, well, I'd honestly give that. Like, I'm never drinking it again, but for the novelty of it and like, the one time sip factor, it gets a solid 7.8 from me.

[Drew Phillips]

If someone put a little bit of tequila in that and then put it in a nice cup with a flower in it and, like, charge me $17 for it, I'd be like, oh, my God, this is so fucking good. I need three of these drinks. Should not be $17. No. No beverage on earth. Okay.

[Andrew]

Like, guys. And yeah, we have, like, actually really bad news.

[Drew Phillips]

You're so annoying.

[Andrew]

Serious. Omg. I was just gonna text you guys. I'm not even home yet. Tomorrow would be better for pool day. You can still come. I don't care.

[Drew Phillips]

That's from Devin.

[Andrew]

Devin Lee.

[Drew Phillips]

Like.

[Andrew]

That'S, like, worse than finding out my grandpa or my brother died.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, Devin, pushing a pool day to a Wednesday instead of a Tuesday is worse than you finding out one of your relatives has passed away.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Yeah. It's, like, really hard for me because I just love her so much, you know?

[Drew Phillips]

You love her more than your family?

[Andrew]

My dead brother. Yeah, literally. Wait, the way that I had my tarot cards read and they said something big was coming on the day of my brother's death anniversary. Tell me why I got to take a picture with Bella Hadid. Big things are coming. She said, yes, you can take one. It was giving free Bella. Like, literally, she's in danger. Free her.

[Drew Phillips]

She did DM me after. And she was like. And like, I shouldn't be sharing this publicly because, like, from one woman to another, she did confide in me. But I will be, like, saying exactly verbatim what she said to me.

[Andrew]

I already know.

[Drew Phillips]

You're like, I'm not. I literally could pull it up, but, like, that would be pushing it. I feel like telling someone's secret is, like, a little less bad than, like, showing their text of the secret. Because if I wanted to, I could, like, keep out words that would, like, soften the blow to you. But basically, she was like, hey, like, I know this is, like, your close friend, and, like, I'm so happy that he was here, but, like, I really wish it was you instead. And also, do y' all still live together? Because is there something wrong with the plumbing? There was, like, this odor that was kind of lingering all night.

[Andrew]

I. My pants, and I left it on there. Did you shoot your pants out of.

[Drew Phillips]

Nervousness because of Bella, or did you just.

[Andrew]

I my pants because I heard pheromones attract lovers, and I was on the prowl last night. Damsel. What is it? I heart damsels. I want to fuck that.

[Drew Phillips]

No, that hat said that hat stands.

[Andrew]

For damsels I want to fuck.

[Drew Phillips]

No, that has, like, a.

[Andrew]

Like a cute girl. Like, a damsel in distress.

[Drew Phillips]

That's what you. That's genuinely what you think I love DILF stands for.

[Andrew]

Yeah, Damsels I want to fuck.

[Drew Phillips]

First of all, it's not doofs. It's DILFs.

[Andrew]

What is actually, what is it?

[Drew Phillips]

It's dads. I'd like to. That's what that means. You're wearing a hat that's, like, provoking. Like, you want.

[Andrew]

Like, I wouldn't wear. I wouldn't wear something like that. So you're stupid. It's kind of based on how you interpret it. And I feel like a match. Majority of the people would interpret it the same way I did.

[Drew Phillips]

You? Yeah. You don't think most people would look at that and think that you're trying to have sex with older men?

[Andrew]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

[Drew Phillips]

Then explain why an older man talk to you.

[Andrew]

So I put this cap on to go grocery shopping and get food and forgot I put it on. I just put it on because my hair looked like that day. This was yesterday. And I, like, my hair was disgusting. Like, look, this is what it looks like. It's gotta go.

[Drew Phillips]

Dude, you have to stop wearing hats every day because, like, you're making bangs without cutting them. Like, take that off again. Take it off. Do you see what I'm saying? Like, literally, it looks like you have baby bangs.

[Andrew]

Thank you. Thank you. That's what I mean to. That's what I'm meaning to do. So I wore the cap to grocery shopping, and I forgot I had it on, and we pulled up and like the. I'm not kidding. The very first person that we saw was a man that was in and he looked at me and he's like, oh, so you like me? You wanna. You wanna. Oh, you like me. And I was like what? I was like caught off so. And he was like because I'm a dilf. And I was like, I was like sir, you are not a dilf. Like you. That is almost a hate crime for you to even claim DILF energy because you are not that. Don't even act like you're that.

[Drew Phillips]

He also looked like Max, like 26. So if he is a DILF, it's one. He's not a DILF. And if he is a dad, it's not on purpose.

[Andrew]

Yeah, you should not be claiming that energy at all. Also I was like, you are not a damsel. I want to fucking. Wait, what is it?

[Drew Phillips]

Okay, so in your case I guess it's I, I heart like DILF stands for damsels. I'd like to.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

And then S because it's plural. Because you're a slut.

[Andrew]

Yeah, simply. But back to Bella. Back to my girl Bella. I know the girls are wanting an a real explanation for that. Literally I actually don't even know how it happened. It's basically all India's doing. And she's just our friend.

[Drew Phillips]

Like she literally thing is because I'm like so like I'm just courageous and I'm like giving and I'm open and my like whole is spread for the people.

[Andrew]

Yes.

[Drew Phillips]

And like I don't like if I have some squirt left to give, I will give squirt to girls who deserve it. And basically it was. I was invited to dinner for Ken which actually we had to talk about this. I think we were literally some of the first people on earth.

[Andrew]

Like yes.

[Drew Phillips]

Before like I think Bella was like a part of like that team. When Kin came out, we literally we.

[Andrew]

Were drinking that tried it like cuz.

[Drew Phillips]

We saw it and we're freaks and we were like oh my God. We could get like I want to see what like a non alcoholic like buzz is.

[Andrew]

Yeah, neurotropic buzz.

[Drew Phillips]

But we literally all broke the rules and like mixed it with alcohol which was literally like the thing you're not supposed to do. But yeah, I just have to say that because we literally just two months ago threw away a can that was, I'm not kidding, like two years old.

[Andrew]

Yeah. But we, we were, we did have like a little phase where we did drink them because they are cool. Like, they do taste good. Like, yeah, I like the new flavor. Tastes really me.

[Drew Phillips]

Andrew loved, like, a. Like an unspiked drink drink. Because, like, also, this is not.

[Andrew]

I need to clarify, this is not a brand.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh, this is. I'm being paid, like, so much money.

[Andrew]

Oh, you got paid?

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, like, hella. Actually, I think that's, like, illegal to, like, even joke about saying that. Like, I didn't do that. Like, please don't send anybody after me.

[Andrew]

Don't send the ira.

[Drew Phillips]

But basically, I got invited to a dinner, but I got stuck in New York, and I had asked and, like, literally pleaded for, like, a plus two. And I. Because I wanted to go with Orion and Drew because I have issues and I refuse to go somewhere and meet new people. But I couldn't make it. So I was like, y' all should still go.

[Andrew]

Yeah. So I tapped in and I texted Devin and I was like, yo, I think I'm gonna go to this event alone. Are you gonna be there? And she was like, yeah, it's gonna be like. Like, we're gonna party all night. It's gonna be a key. And I didn't take that literally. I just was like, oh. Like, it's just gonna be a cute little event from five to eight. And I was so down to go alone because I was like, I know these people. It's five to eight. Like, I'm going to go. And then Orion hit me up after and was like, oh, yeah, I'm going to go. So I was, like, even more comfortable about it. But me and Orion were so down to go because it was an event from 5 to 8 and neither of us wanted to be out that night.

[Drew Phillips]

Because, like, Orion's booked and busy and literally had to go back to Europe.

[Andrew]

Yeah, literally. And it's just, like, going out right now. It's just not my vibe right now. But we pull up and it is really fucking intimate. Like, I was not expecting the intimacy of this event.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, intimate. Like, we're like, where there was like.

[Andrew]

Like, sex parties and orgies and.

[Drew Phillips]

What?

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Did you get to join or. No, they probably really didn't want you around.

[Andrew]

No, they. They begged. But I just, like, was rather, like, I was in a cuck energy. So I just got.

[Drew Phillips]

But I was on a cuck vibe.

[Andrew]

Yeah. You know, but yeah, it was just like, a really cute thing. And a friendship has blossomed.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, in a real way, a friendship has kin blossomed. Wait, is that a good joke? Whatever.

[Andrew]

A friendship has bloomed. But, yeah, that's what I wanted Was.

[Drew Phillips]

The rose ice cubes. Like, that was what I was, like, missing out on. I love a drink. I love a pretty drink. Like, honestly, like, I would be an alcoholic if everywhere I went, it was, like, cheap, like, pretty drink. And that's okay for me to admit.

[Andrew]

But, yeah, it was a blast. And it was a movie, and me and Bella kissed, and that's it.

[Drew Phillips]

I don't think she would appreciate you saying that publicly.

[Andrew]

She literally commented, don't kiss and tell on my.

[Drew Phillips]

I think, like, it's like, a metaphor. So now I'm starting to typically just don't understand.

[Andrew]

Typically, I don't kiss and tell. But it's Bella. That's my girl. That's my best friend.

[Drew Phillips]

So you have to tell.

[Andrew]

Yeah, that's my best friend. It's easy for me.

[Drew Phillips]

So when it comes to somebody you have, like, an intimate, close relationship with, you have to snitch and, like.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Talk about it.

[Andrew]

Yep.

[Drew Phillips]

You're weird. You're a weird folk.

[Andrew]

Like, yeah, you're a weird folk.

[Drew Phillips]

I was trying to say, like, you're, like, a weird person, and I like folks because I was thinking about, like, you folks are weird.

[Andrew]

Like, I've literally never heard that.

[Drew Phillips]

It's not a common phrase, but my brain made that up.

[Andrew]

Oh, mad at me. Holy shit.

[Drew Phillips]

I'm joking.

[Andrew]

And you got in a little fight this morning.

[Drew Phillips]

Did we?

[Andrew]

Not really. But, no, we didn't get in a fight.

[Drew Phillips]

Drew literally hates being told what to do.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

It's the right thing to be told.

[Andrew]

It really is. Like, it gets under my skin, but.

[Drew Phillips]

And I used to back down, but now I double down.

[Andrew]

It get. What pisses me off about it is it's already something that I was actively doing. And then when someone tells me to do it, I'm like, no, kill yourself. I'm not doing that now. But I was already actively doing it, and it just pissed me off. But, yeah, we did get into, like, there was some tensions there. On both parties. You have to admit, on both parties, there was some tension. And it's. And it's okay. It's okay.

[Drew Phillips]

No, literally, I had no tension. I was. I've been living my life.

[Andrew]

See, that's what you do is you do have just a little bit of tension, and then you say you don't, so then you gaslight everybody.

[Drew Phillips]

No, when. Bitch. When I'm mad, I'm fudgeing mad. Like, I feel like I, like, cannot hide when I'm, like, upset. Like. But what I do was now, okay, basically what happened is Drew was Like, oh, I'm feeling a little sick. And last night I was like, I could tell he was. I could tell you were pissed last night, but I was like, is he mad at me? Because, like, this is not my fault that you, like, feel sick.

[Andrew]

And I, like, I was not mad last night. I was mad this morning.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh. But last night he, like, was having a, like, it felt weird. And I was like, I don't know if he's mad at me. Oh. Because he was like, I feel sick. And I literally immediately went, oh. And, like, covered her mouth.

[Andrew]

Oh, that, that did piss me off. When I was in the bathroom, I was.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. And I could tell it pissed him off. And I was like, okay, like, like, girl, I don't want to get sick. I have decided, and I'm, I'm just, like, going to say it for everybody, like, it is a Frappuccino and refresher summer.

[Andrew]

I decided. Starbucks.

[Drew Phillips]

Yes.

[Andrew]

The refreshers. Yes. Like, 100.

[Drew Phillips]

When's the last time you had a Frappuccino from Starbucks? Okay, seventh grade, to be fair. Like, it's a Frappuccino summer in the way that, like, if you're willing to spend $7 and have five sips of a drink before passing away from sugar overdose.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

That's like, the vibe.

[Andrew]

You know what the vibe is? Is the sour cream on. I mean, the foam. The foam on top of the drinks.

[Drew Phillips]

The whipped cream.

[Andrew]

Yes, that's what I'm down for. Putting the cream.

[Drew Phillips]

So you, you put sour cream on your Frappuccinos?

[Andrew]

Yeah, it's like this weird, like, Is.

[Drew Phillips]

It like a Southern thing?

[Andrew]

That's a white thing.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh, you said it's a white delicacy. Oh, okay.

[Andrew]

It's a colonizer thing. But no, the foam with the caramel sauce. Like, one time. I know. I heard that you can order, like, dog drinks from Starbucks, and it's literally just a cup of the foam.

[Drew Phillips]

The whipped cream.

[Andrew]

I can't say it. Yeah, the whipped cream. And I ordered that. And I was like, can I get that with caramel on it? And they were like, no. And I was like, why? And they're like, you're literally not a dog. This was in Granberry. And I was like, no, I, I, I think the whipped cream from Starbucks is easily the best whipped cream. Whipped cream on planet. It's like, farty. And, like, it has, like, this, like, weird, like, scent to it when you eat it. I can't describe it. It's indescribable, but it's fucking good. That's the summer. The summer of the foam.

[Drew Phillips]

But I was with a few friends when we were in New York, and, like, two of them got a strawberry or, like, a refresher. I don't know what flavor it was, but they had it with lemonade. I was like, damn, that is so good. And who would have known? Refreshing. Like, I was like, that is literally so delicious.

[Andrew]

The hibiscus refreshers, it was like, no.

[Drew Phillips]

They got like a raspberry one. It was one I hadn't tried before. I was, damn, this shit is fucking good.

[Andrew]

Where they squish the raspberries in the bottom with the stick.

[Drew Phillips]

It had nothing in it. Like, it. It was just like a pink drink.

[Andrew]

But it wasn't the pinkity drinkity.

[Drew Phillips]

It's giving pinkity drinking stinkity drinkity. But I would also maybe go to argue maybe it's not a Frappuccino from Starbucks as much as it is a frappe from McDonald's. Like, I love, like, between the two, a frappe from McDonald's is better than a Frappuccino from Starbucks. No, no. The girls who don't know the chocolate chip frappe is from McDonald's. One time I was ordering a fucking frappe at McDonald's, and I said, frappuccino. And they go, it's a frappe. I was like, we're literally talking about fudgeing mushy coffee ice cream right now. Like, I'm at McDonald's at 2am and you're correcting me about a frappe?

[Andrew]

You know what? If we're talking about iced beverages that have coffee in them, the coffee frosty from Chick Fil A is delicious. And I'm sorry for mentioning that during Pride Month. I really am.

[Drew Phillips]

But technically, when this is out, it's not Pride Month anymore. So you can, like, yeah, yeah.

[Andrew]

It's giving. It's.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, yeah.

[Andrew]

When's. When's the Chick Fil A rainbow logo dropping? We need that.

[Drew Phillips]

Every other company for Pride Month, like, turns it up. Why is it. Imagine I just had no idea the implications of Chick Fil A. I was like, wait, actually, why don't they do that?

[Andrew]

It is crazy.

[Drew Phillips]

I haven't had that before. But, yeah, it's just like, I'm on my beverage again. I'm always on my beverage, though.

[Andrew]

Like a baby girl.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, something about drinking, like, drinking things is so nice. And that's my take. That's my big, hot take. Also, I was so famished on my plane ride back that the girl next to me was kind of around my age, and she had hot cheetos. And I, like, never wanted chips so bad in my life. And I genuinely was contemplating being like, I will paypal you right now for some cheetos. Like, I genuinely was thinking that. And then I was, like, watching what she was watching to kind of gauge, like, what her vibe in life was. And she was watching, like, I couldn't tell what she was watching, but she was watching, like, a. What seemed like a drama with young people, but she was watching it on her iPhone. So I was like, okay, she's a bit of a freak, because, like, who is this? Just, like, someone next to me on a plane because, like, to watch something, to commit to watching something on your iPhone instead of just watching something on the screen on the airplane, like, you're definitely committed to what you're watching. So I was like, okay, she's like a part of some sort of stand culture, so maybe it wouldn't be that weird if I asked her for hot chips. But I just, like, couldn't take myself to do it. And then. But then we had a bonding moment because there was a medical emergency on the plane.

[Andrew]

Yes.

[Drew Phillips]

At the front of the plane. They were like, oh, if you have, like, any medical. Like, if you work in the medical field, can you please, like, ring your light and come up to the front? And both of our nosy, like, energy activated. And both of us were like, what'd they say? Like, what did they say? Like, what's happening? And, like, both of us were like, I don't know. Like, did you hear what was happening? And we both started, like, peeking up and looking around, and we were both cracking jokes where we were like, I'm so sorry, but two things. Like, one, of course, I hope that person's ok. Okay? But if they emergency land this plane, I will literally kill myself. And then. Because I want to go home. I want to go home.

[Andrew]

That's, like, literally an experience for me. Like, getting an emergency landing is giving, like, adrenaline.

[Drew Phillips]

We were an hour and 30 out, so that meant we would land in butt, Arizona. And I was like, I'm not landing in Arizona and taking a goddamn bus back home.

[Andrew]

The airplane wheels are gonna melt on the tarmac. And then 186 degrees.

[Drew Phillips]

Two, we, like, kept joking, and we were like. I was like, what they need to do is whenever that's solved, get back on the thing and be like, oh, my God, guys. Like, it's also chill. Like, it worked out fine. The person's okay, here's what happened. Like, I needed to know what happened. So then I was like, this is my time to be like, by the way, can I have some of your hot cheetos? But I was like, that's too crazy. And then I just watched her finish the bag, and I was like, I want.

[Andrew]

I would have clicked the button and said I was a doctor because I have two years of anatomy under my belt.

[Drew Phillips]

I literally, I. We. I made that joke to her. I was like, I should just go up there and be like, oh, my God. Hey. Like, I can't help right now, but I just wanted to look.

[Andrew]

I just wanted to. Literally, I just, like, I just wanted to witness.

[Drew Phillips]

And I'll take photos just in case you need them later also, so I could talk to my friends about it.

[Andrew]

And text it to them and be dramatic, truly. Oh, speaking of literally, airplane. I just read this note. So I. I was. I had. I was on the airplane, and I was in the window seat, and there was like, a grandma who was like, 863 years old next to me that I like, I. And I had to pee so bad. Like, and I had. I never had to pee like this on the airplane. But I, like, felt so bad for asking her to get up because it really. It was like a struggle for her to get down. And I was like, I don't want to see her, like, try to get up to. This leg is, like, completely numb right now, and it's, like, scary as fudge. But I didn't want to see her, like, have to get up or whatever. But I actually, I would have sprayed piss all over myself if I had not done this. But I got up and it was literally fine. She was like, oh, yeah, like, no. No worries, honey. And she called me honey. And I love being called honey. It made me feel so happy. I love being called honey and buddy. Like, if someone calls me buddy, like, or bud, like, stop.

[Drew Phillips]

But I feel like buddy and bud is like, passive aggressive. Like, hey, bud.

[Andrew]

No, it's like, hey, bud, why don't you come over here?

[Drew Phillips]

We don't say that where I'm from. Don't say that to me.

[Andrew]

But walk to the bathroom. One of them has occupied on it, and then one of them doesn't. So I obviously go to the one that doesn't have occupied on it, and I push it open, and I see a woman pissing on the toilet. And she was like. And, like, pulled the door shut, and I, like, I had never, like, been so humiliated in my life. And I was like. I was like, sorry. And she, like, Pulled it shut. And I was like, okay, that is not my fault. But I literally stood, like, in, like. You know how the bathrooms in the back of the plane are, like, in the kitchen area? And I just stood looking like that. Like, I just, like, was, like, looking into the kitchen area like this and just, like, praying to God she didn't come out yet. And thankfully she didn't. And the guy in the bathroom that I was going in, I. I never got into the bathrooms quicker than that in my life. I, like, pushed that door open and ran in because I was like, she cannot see me, dude.

[Drew Phillips]

That actually just reminded me that happened to me. Like, I was the girl on the plane to Portugal. I was. Except it was the worker who busted open. I had the door locked, and I was taking a fat, nice shit in the fucking bathroom. And literally, I had the door locked. And I think. I think I was in there too long. That one of the workers was like, oh, why is this door closed? Like, why is it locked? And she unlocked the door and opened it and saw me, and I just was like, hello. Like, I literally didn't like, overreact or anything. I was just like. Because I literally. My head was pressed up against the door because I was on my phone shitting. And then I heard. I felt the door. Door jiggle and open. And I just, like, looked up, and she was like, oh. And, like, closed the door, and I locked it. And I started laughing because I was like, dude, that's so awesome. She literally, like, just walked in on me.

[Andrew]

You on the airplane?

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, I poop anywhere. I'm not holding my.

[Andrew]

That's literally.

[Drew Phillips]

That's why you don't be. Because you. You spent so much of your life holding yourself back.

[Andrew]

But I am.

[Drew Phillips]

I'm the kind of person who I will. Where I need to.

[Andrew]

There. There's, like, nervous peers. I am, like, a nervous. I don't know why. It's. It's like, the same idea, like, as, like, farting. For me, like, it really is so humiliating. Even though everybody does it. It's like. Like the same idea for shitting. Like, I am so scared of shitting. But in those moments of us looking at each other, it felt like a lifetime. Like, I'm not kidding. Like, we made eye contact, and it felt like forever. Like, I could draw her face because it's so.

[Drew Phillips]

We're back in the age of accidentally walking in on people using the bathroom because I got walked in. Me. We're back in that age.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Like, that was ever an era.

[Drew Phillips]

We're Back in the era, Bring me back. Got walked in on also, she was so punctured. She was like, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And I was like, no, you're okay. Like, I don't care. And I was like laughing. And she's like, no, really, I'm so sorry. And I was like, I, I not kidding. Like it's funny. Like I don't care. But when I was in la, I walked in on a girl, this, she was wearing a bodysuit, so her boobs are out. And I walked in on the bathroom. Or like, and she wasn't sitting, she was like popping a proper soc squat, like, not letting herself touch the toilet. And she was just like in like, like squatting position with all her boobs. And like, she was basically butt ass naked in the bathroom. And I walked in on her and she was like, she literally. She yelled like a murder was there. And I did leave the restaurant.

[Andrew]

I was like, I was with like.

[Drew Phillips]

Elisa and our friends and, and like jester. And I was like, no, I would have like, we need to go. I was like, we need to like, leave. I'm going to use the bathroom somewhere else. What was the worst part is, like, I was like, this is God telling me I need to stop washing my hands after I eat because I didn't even need to use the bathroom. I just needed to wash my hands, but I just walked to a different place to wash my hands.

[Andrew]

Nice, nice, nice, nice.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, I. Walking in on someone using the bathroom is literally so funny.

[Andrew]

Oh, my God. Wait, I literally cannot. I just looked at my other note and it was the note below that one. But my flight to Texas, the guy next to me, I feel like this only happens to me, but the guy next to me smelt like gooty kaka. Like, literally like he. It was like he like filled his shoes with. I don't. I literally cannot describe it. He smelled rancid. And then also he had like a massive boner hard on the entire time. And he was like, no, he was like adjusting it the whole flight. And like, it was really, really scary.

[Drew Phillips]

I think. Are there people who just like get boners on flights?

[Andrew]

I think every guy does it.

[Drew Phillips]

Gets a boner on a flight.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Kai's never been on a plane, so he doesn't know.

[Andrew]

No, I think like every guy does. I mean, I do sometimes. And even in like car rides, I do too as well. Not like full.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, maybe you're just like, like clinic.

[Andrew]

No, it's like the, the bouncing. Yeah, it feels like it's simulating sex. It simulates sex. Well, we should talk about when I. This incident that I had in middle school. I don't know if I've talked about it before, but I. Oh, I'll let you know and I'll shut you down. I just remembered it when I was back in Texas because I had seen these for the first time in a very long time. But I don't know if they were a thing in your school, but in Texas they were huge. But do you remember Miss Me jeans?

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, those were, those were bigger like in like Hialeah than they were like the area I grew up. But they were like big. Like in Miami there was like, yeah, the bus stops with it on it.

[Andrew]

So if you don't know what Miss Me Jeans are, they're like jeans that like the asses are hella studded in like rhinestones and metal.

[Drew Phillips]

They're like jeggings.

[Andrew]

Yeah, exactly. They're. They're just jeans with rhinestones covering the asses and like different material or different patterns. So in Texas we have these things called tax tests or had they changed them to star tests? And I think they got changed again. But it's like basically end of year testing where you test your like knowledge throughout the year. And it's kind of like either if you pass this, you pass, if you don't, you don't. And it's kind of like state. It's just state testing. And it was, it was starting to become a point in like my school career where like school gave me really bad anxiety if I didn't do well. And so like I was up literally, I think it was like fifth grade and I was up all fucking night studying for the. I think it was like, I think it was science and social studies 1. I don't know if they were like, because it was like four days of testing and I stayed up all night studying. And I was like really excited about it because I was like, oh, I'm going to slay this shit. Like, it's going to be awesome. But I woke up really fucking late. Like my mom forgot to wake me up and I woke up really late. So I ran downstairs and went into the dirty clothes bin and put on the first pair of pants that I saw because I thought they were mine and they were my sister's Miss Me jeans. And I wore Miss Me jeans to school. Like studded ass jeans like crazy. Like they were like the craziest fucking Miss Me jeans I've ever seen. And I sat down in my Chair. And the only reason I noticed was because when I sat down, it, like, scratched the bottom of the chair. And I was like, oh, my fucking God. And not only was I taking a state mandated testing, I also was wearing girl jeans. And I was fucking mortified. So mortified that I took my jacket off and I tied it around my waist and I wore it for the rest of the day like that. And I don't know if anybody noticed or if everybody was like, get yours, king. Like, yes, pride. Like, live your life. But it was really fucking scary. And there was another fucking part of this story that I'm literally forgetting right now. But yeah, I just wore those Miss Me jeans. And it was really humid. Oh, this is what it was. And since that point on, I either slept fully closed all the way up until high school. I either slept fully clothed in the outfit that I was gonna wear the next day, like jeans and everything, or I would pick out my outfit and put it to the side. But I. I slept in my school uniform, I slept in my jeans. Like, I. I was never, ever gonna have that mistake again because it actually traumatized me.

[Drew Phillips]

My dad would get sick, so mad at me for sleeping in my school clothes. But I was like, I don't want to get up and get ready. Like, I would just, like, rather sleep in it. I'm clean anyway. Like, I shower at night, so I'm like, I'm cleaning my clothes. So I'm just gonna do this.

[Andrew]

Me, I was disgusting. I didn't shower.

[Drew Phillips]

That's really nasty. I cannot believe you just took a bite of that sandwich.

[Andrew]

Why?

[Drew Phillips]

Because it's so. Like, I ate it sitting raw back there. Like, it's freaking me out. Like, all the dust getting on it. It probably tastes good, though. Dust smells good. Like, let's talk about that. Dust literally has, like, a good scent. Dust smells like love. And I was going to fudge and say something and I already forgot. While you were talking. Oh, we've created while the God, our.

[Andrew]

Own God, is the algorithm.

[Drew Phillips]

While you were talking about, like, testing, I just remembered that while we were taking the F cat in fourth grade, I sat on my chair like this to talk to someone behind me. Like, I was like, this talking to someone, like, behind me. And I thought I had a silent fart.

[Andrew]

Oh, no.

[Drew Phillips]

And it was a loud ass fart. And literally my eyes were sticking out in the air.

[Andrew]

It's actually so funny that every human being just fart is farting all the time. Like, every single person that watched this farted during the stage.

[Drew Phillips]

If it's gonna be silent or not. Like, I was just like, oh, it's a little one. Like, it won't be that loud. Dude, it was so loud. And I literally, like, I. I took it like a champ. I was like. I was like. I just made a joke about farting and I was like, yeah, I don't give a fuck. Like, I'm gonna fart on all you. Like, I don't care. Like, I literally just farted on your head because, like, my ass was literally, like. You know when tables are lined up like this? So I literally farted on the back of someone's head.

[Andrew]

They deserved it.

[Drew Phillips]

I just thought about that. Like, dude.

[Andrew]

They literally deserved it. Every single person that has watched this episode has farted during this episode.

[Drew Phillips]

Not every single person. That would be crazy. I mean, there are a lot of people who, like, eat and watch this, so maybe they are farting while they're eating. I don't know. Wait, is this how that works?

[Andrew]

No. No, I don't see any correlation in that.

[Drew Phillips]

Okay, I guess you fart a lot a while after you eat. Like, sometimes, like an hour after when you're digesting, you'll let out a little toot. So maybe I got the timing on that wrong. But it's an hour long episode, so if you, like, are famished and you scarf down your food in the first five minutes, by the time we get to media, you're letting out your little toots from your meal.

[Andrew]

Yes, ma' am. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. It's giving.

[Drew Phillips]

What, like, what were you gonna say?

[Andrew]

Nothing. I was filling the void, the silence.

[Drew Phillips]

Did I talk about my Uber driver who almost hit a girl and then yelled at her?

[Andrew]

I think we talked about it, like, two episodes ago.

[Drew Phillips]

Really? But that happened in Paris.

[Andrew]

Oh, then no, we didn't talk about it.

[Drew Phillips]

Literally, while I was in Paris, I was like, you know what? I'm gonna go out today. But it was so hot that I was like, I'm not about to walk around. Like, because it was like a 20, 30 minute walk to where I was going. So I was like, like, I'll get there and then I'll walk around. And I was like, yeah, I'm gonna go out alone and spend all day alone. And I got in the car and I was like, yeah. And I got in the car because I was like, oh, it's gonna be like cold in a car. First of all, this man did not have the AC on, so it was so hot in there. And I. We turned the corner from the hotel.

[Andrew]

Well, they don't have AC in Paris cars.

[Drew Phillips]

Who told you that?

[Andrew]

I don't know. I made it up.

[Drew Phillips]

The audio. That's like. That's what the people are saying. It's like, who are the people? That's what the people are saying. But I didn't even get a corner around from the fucking hotel room or from the hotel. And my Uber driver almost slammed into a girl who was crossing the street, and she had the right to cross. And instead of just being like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry, and, like, driving away, they started arguing, like, insanely. He put down the window, was like. And started yelling at her.

[Andrew]

Is that your impression of French people?

[Drew Phillips]

Like, gibberish? Yeah. No, literally, I'm not kidding. Like, I can't believe, like, there's a different language that I don't understand. But that's like. I've already said that. But they started yelling at each other. And I have a feeling he called her, like, a whore or something, because then she started repeating it back and being like, oh, yeah, like. Like, that was her energy. She was like. Like, if someone called someone, like, a. She was like, oh, I'm a slut. Like, oh, that's what you're calling me? Like, a slut. Like, she started getting up into the car, and I literally felt so fucking awkward because I was just. I don't think anybody realized it was an Uber. And I was in the back seat, and I was just in the backseat, like. Like, literally, like, sweating my ass.

[Andrew]

Uber drivers are the most angry people on Earth.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. And I was like, do I just get out? Like, I might just get out and, like, get in a taxi or something. But I was, like, too nervous to make that big of a stand because I was like, imagine, like, I'm like, okay, he's being fucking rude to this girl. Fuck him. And, like, open the door to get out. And that's the moment he drive off, and I fucking, like, slam onto the pavement. But it was so awkward, and, like, people started coming around to, like, interfere. Like, they were going on for. So actually, I'm gonna play it, and y' all tell me, because I got, like, a small video of it. And, like, if you speak French, tell me what these are saying. Also, do you want to see a really nasty video of my toe? I got a blister and I never popped it.

[Andrew]

Yes. Yes. Show me your toes. Show me your toe. Yes.

[Drew Phillips]

No. Because now you. You sound like you really want it.

[Andrew]

Like, no, just show it to me. Just show it to Me. Don't, like, bring it up and not show it to me. Just show me your feet.

[Drew Phillips]

Do you think this outfit looks good on me?

[Andrew]

You need to wear that out more. You need to wear that outfit out.

[Drew Phillips]

I just showed Drew a picture of me wearing some shorts and a shirt.

[Andrew]

Her ass was hanging out.

[Drew Phillips]

My ass cracked with.

[Andrew]

Wait, we need to start showing butt crack more. Like, that's the thing.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, no body humor is so funny. Like, that's what I've realized recently is, like, that is so funny. Like, why, literally, as a grown ass adult, can my ass crack ever be out by accident?

[Andrew]

Oh, I think they said, I just saw Drew with Bella Hadid. Drew Philips with. Was with Bella Hadid.

[Drew Phillips]

I don't like. But that was, like, two weeks before that happened, so how would they have known that?

[Andrew]

I don't know. They just, like, predicted that or something.

[Drew Phillips]

Relating everything to the fact that you hung out with Bella.

[Andrew]

That's my girl. I mean, like, essentially. We're essentially dating. Like, basically.

[Drew Phillips]

Did she, like, confirm that to you or are you just, like, making that assumption? You have to speak up.

[Andrew]

She understand.

[Drew Phillips]

Okay. I mean, I'll take that answer. Like, that was a good answer.

[Andrew]

It's giving good answer. But like I was saying, I went back to my first place of work, and my manager was still there, and I don't know, it was just really cute to, like, see them. What? Sorry.

[Drew Phillips]

I literally just thought about my butt cracking.

[Andrew]

Literally.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, does this outfit look good? Okay, yeah. So you saw them? Did you have a sweet conversation with them?

[Andrew]

Yes. We just, like, caught up. And my old co manager, she. She's now a co manager of the place. Sarah, she was just, like, really sweet to me, and I, like, missed that environment. And I was like, you know what? Like, I could go back there and work. But then I thought about it, and I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But she made fun of me to my face. She was like, yeah, literally, you thought you were slick, but you would go into the fucking ice cooler and be on your iPhone for three hours, but you still got all your work done. So I like, never really got on to. But I was like, yeah, I literally was on my iPhone forever, and I was gonna bring up the fact that I stole from them a lot, but I was like, I don't know.

[Drew Phillips]

It hasn't been 10 years yet.

[Andrew]

Yeah, it hasn't been long enough. But yeah, I would steal 20 out of the cast register almost every shift and be like, I don't know. I must have. Oh, I'm so stupid. I must have given a 20 instead of a 1. Like, oh. And I would just keep it and I would pocket it. So every shift I would make 20 more dollars than I had to, honestly.

[Drew Phillips]

And, like, that's good for you. Like, you were going out of your way and getting what you wanted and what you deserve.

[Andrew]

And I don't feel bad about it at all.

[Drew Phillips]

You literally. I mean, it's like a huge corporation.

[Andrew]

Exactly, exactly. And I don't feel bad about it. And also, I found out that the store I worked at was. Is number two most popular in the nation. It's like. Number two. Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Are there racetracks in, like, other states or is it just, like, is there one here? They need Wawa here. We have to.

[Andrew]

We need Wawa re.

[Drew Phillips]

Engage in going into stores and just standing in them. But the thing is, doesn't have, like, stores the way other cities do. Like, the targets here aren't as fun to stand in because they're, like, so small and it's like, not a vibe. Like, they don't have, like, the kind of trinkets that make it, like, fun to stand in. The Walmart is too far and it closes too fucking early. Like, honestly. What?

[Andrew]

Oh, it's giving. We need to go to Walmart tonight and literally loiter. I'm not even joking me.

[Drew Phillips]

When we're supposed to. We keep telling each other, yeah, no, tomorrow night we're gonna, like, go to the gym. And now it's changed to Walmart.

[Andrew]

I would rather go to Walmart than the gym. Like, we could just lift the weights, we could lift the little children walking around. And it could be a gym.

[Drew Phillips]

But see, when Walmart closes, because I'm like, if it closes at 11, no, I need to be there. Like, I need to be there at a time when, like, the real freaks are.

[Andrew]

Yeah, and like, I say that like.

[Drew Phillips]

We'Re not the freaks rolling in, but, like, I need, like, the other.

[Andrew]

The freaks in question are us.

[Drew Phillips]

What LA does have is, like, a.

[Andrew]

Good CVS or writing the one on Normandy.

[Drew Phillips]

Let me see. Guys, meet up at the Walmart. We're gonna be there tonight.

[Andrew]

Meet us at the Normandy Walmart.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh, wow, this is not that far.

[Andrew]

We should go to the Torrance one because that's where BAE lives.

[Drew Phillips]

Who. Who is bae? Oh, bae. Like, damn, that's far.

[Andrew]

I know, I know. So it's basically.

[Drew Phillips]

It's basically long distance.

[Andrew]

Is that what you're gonna do? That's my ideal relationship.

[Drew Phillips]

Not the first ad for being the Go Girl. Like, the female, like, pissing standing up. Contract.

[Andrew]

You go, girl.

[Drew Phillips]

I need one of those. Like, actually, like, I would use.

[Andrew]

Well, no, that's. It's. These are targeted ads.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, why is that on your phone?

[Andrew]

Put the pieces together. I have a piss kink. We need to normalize long distance relationships.

[Drew Phillips]

That's probably one of the most normal things for the.

[Andrew]

I require a long distance.

[Drew Phillips]

I think it just became, like, super normal because I remember, like, this isn't, like, necessarily long distance as much as it is, like, now. Remember how, like, were you somebody who was, like, e dating like, casually when.

[Andrew]

You were like, oh, hell no.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, when you. When you were like.

[Andrew]

I mean, I had e crushes.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. Like, but to me, I was like, I would.

[Andrew]

I was on Omegle.

[Drew Phillips]

No, I mean, like, you had, like, a mutual. Who, like, you guys became friends, and then it was flirty, and then you were like, oh, like, we're kind of seeing each other.

[Andrew]

Never. Never flirty. But I had crushes.

[Drew Phillips]

Okay. So I, like, would always engage in those kind of, like, interactions on the Internet. And I had, like, a bunch of, like, little, like, relationships online, but I could never tell my. I could never tell my friends in real life because when I was younger, that was so crazy. And, like, there people would be like, there's no way. That's not a, like, old. Don't talk to strangers on the Internet FaceTime them and stuff. It wasn't, like, normal. And now I feel like it's super normal now. I feel like most kids on the Internet, like, like, who are like 13, 14 or like, talking to other 13, 14 year olds via tick tock and they're like, yeah, we're dating. Like, yeah, that's my bae.

[Andrew]

Literally. What did I even say? Oh, my ideal relationship is a long distance relationship.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

Like, 100. Like, I never want to see my partner ever. Like, and that's. It's simple, really. I need to date someone with, like, an insane job with awful hours or just so I can have my space.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, I guess also, distance makes the heart grow fonder.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Because then, like, you. Since you see that person less when you do see them, you're more likely to, like, value that time than somebody.

[Andrew]

At any given moment.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. Long distance can be a serve because you just get to, like, live your life and then you get to have time with that person, and then you get to live your life and, like, vice versa. Vice versa. But I feel like if you're somebody with, like, a lot of trust issues and, like, things of that nature. It literally will kill you. And, like, don't even do it.

[Andrew]

I know. I'm like, I'm very curious to see how I'm going to react when I get into a relationship. If, like, I'm a really jealous, like, person, which I have a feeling I'm going to be. I. My first relationship is going to be so fucking toxic. Like, it's going to be dangerously toxic.

[Drew Phillips]

No, literally, we were talking about this in the car and I was like, it's going to be one of those boys where I was like, oh, my girl is crazy. My girl is crazy. Crazy.

[Andrew]

He's a psycho.

[Drew Phillips]

Where I'm like, yeah, no, yeah, I feel. No, I. I can see where you're.

[Andrew]

Coming from when your friend is the obviously wrong one. And.

[Drew Phillips]

No, you just like, that's like, the best way to, like, put it lightly is like. I mean, I could. I could see how you. Why you would feel like that.

[Andrew]

Like. Yeah, no, I'm literally like. But, like, let's look at. Look at it from their perspective. Like, let's see it from their perspective.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah, but. Okay, let's put on, like, the reality glasses for a minute. Let's put on the 3D, like, IMAX.

[Andrew]

Glasses and take the colored lenses.

[Drew Phillips]

Is that your take on rose colored?

[Andrew]

Yeah, like, let's put on the, like. Because reality is, like, reality actually is.

[Drew Phillips]

Really fun and I, like, love it. And everything happening is, like, so fun. Like, I just, like, life is awesome right now. Like, there's literally nothing to complain about.

[Andrew]

We haven't really talked about Bria from Tik Tok.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh, that's.

[Andrew]

That's our girl.

[Drew Phillips]

I am on her page so often that, like, if you know my TikTok, like, I don't follow anybody because I literally. And also, it's not like a cunty thing on my part. I genuinely don't look at my following list. So that's why, on my new account, I just didn't follow anybody because I'm like, the people I want to see. Like, I see them and, like, I still like their shit, but I'm on her page so much that I, like, like, always fall asleep and, like, wake up and I'm like, I'm following her. Like, and then I, like, I unfollowed her twice because I don't like it to seem like of, like, I'm playing favorites kind of game. But then I just left it because I'm like, I really do be on her page.

[Andrew]

Yeah, she rules. And I will never Create. I will never make a dish she makes. Maybe. Maybe the cowboy caviar. But, like, I just like watching people cook, and I, like, live vicariously through it. Like, I just love, like. Like, seeing people cooking. I'm like, one day, that's gonna be me. One day.

[Drew Phillips]

The cowboy caviar reminds me of, like, pico de gallo.

[Andrew]

Yeah. It's giving. Yeah. I will literally never, ever cook. I will order postmates for the rest of my life. No, I'm. I'm about to enter my cooking era because, like, when I start going to the gym, if I'm not eating all the time, I'm going to lose weight, and I do not want to lose weight. I want to gain weight.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah.

[Andrew]

And I want to be thick. Not, like, I don't want a thick ass. I mean, that's, like, a plus.

[Drew Phillips]

You want, like, James Charles body.

[Andrew]

No, I want, like. Like, Jack Donahue body.

[Drew Phillips]

Okay.

[Andrew]

Which is impossible for me, too.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. I'm like. I'm sorry to break it to you, but, like, I don't think you have the bone structure. The bones. But I feel that I, like. I think I'm someone who, like, I go through phases of liking cooking, but the problem with me is I like the same thing every single day. And then that's just, like, doesn't make cooking fun. And also, I think it's because of my lack of ability to, like, really focus in and pay attention when I cook. I do too much, and then, like, my dish is, like, a million.

[Andrew]

You're doing too much.

[Drew Phillips]

My dishes. A million things in one plate. And then it tastes bad because. And I'm like, why does this taste bad? It's because it's literally every single vegetable that I bought three days, I was about to say, and I put them in one thing.

[Andrew]

All your dishes taste the same, but it's not, like, a bad thing. But they all taste the same thing because you use the exact same ingredients for all of it.

[Drew Phillips]

Because I, like, know what I like. That's my issue is, like, I don't want to try something new. I know what I like, but I wish I could be, like, a cooking girl. Like, Maddie Bragg is, like, literally my dream. I wish I was like that. Like, that I was gonna say. And then I was like, that sounds really aggressive. But I wish I was that girl. Like, oh, my God, she be cooking.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

And I'm like, I want this to be my life. But honestly, like, you either that's either your life or that's not your life. Like, you either are somebody who likes. Like, you genuinely enjoy cooking as a hobby or you don't? I just don't like washing dishes like that. Like, I, like, keep my, like, food cooking to a minimum of, like, three things.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Yeah. I need to start cooking.

[Drew Phillips]

I've never seen you cook a day in my life. That's a lie. I've seen you boil hot dogs.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Hey. Boiled hot dogs. And drank the hot dog water and threw the hot dogs away. I baked those cookies. Yeah. I've ever eaten in my life. Fuck. What was I gonna goddamn say?

[Drew Phillips]

I also wish I was a baking girl, but baking takes time. You bitches are, like, putting time aside. Like, that's true. Self care is like making yourself something a sweet, sweet treat. But I just can't. I'd rather buy the sweet treat.

[Andrew]

I was gonna say that the Greer show in Austin was easily the best smelling concert that I've ever been to. Smelling. Yeah. Like, they. Our fans. Wash their bodies. They, y' all. Wash y' all.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. I've never interacted with somebody who's stunk.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Who's, like, a fan of us.

[Andrew]

They. I mean, every show that I've been to lately has stunk. Like, that one was a good show.

[Drew Phillips]

The girls smell good. The girls are. The girls are doing, like, the, like, la. You perfume.

[Andrew]

Literally. Literally.

[Drew Phillips]

They're on smell. They're all on smell talk.

[Andrew]

Literally, smell good. I know I've talked about so much this episode, but this reminded me of when I. When we were on tour and our very first show in Los Angeles, when I got so anxiety and nervous that I sprayed shit out of my ass and I essentially, like, went to the bathroom, exploded shit out of my ass in the bathroom, and then ran out and ran onto stage because it was, like, time to go. Do you remember that? I was so scared. Dude. I have such a fright. Stage fright. It's crazy.

[Drew Phillips]

I don't think I have stage fright, but I. Which doesn't make sense. It's very, like, certain, like, particular things that give me, like, anxiety or, like, an anxious.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Or, like, nervousness. But I don't feel like. I know I. I, like. I would get, like, nervous jitters, but, like, they were, like, in excitement. Like, I was never, like, oh, like, dreading to get on stage. It's usually like, I get a lot of adrenaline. I'm like, we're about to, like, stand in front of people and talk.

[Andrew]

Yeah. Mine is a complete opposite. I'm like, I can't do this. I have to go. I have to. I just have to Leave. We just have to cancel the show, and we'll just, like, ruin everybody's day.

[Drew Phillips]

Trying to think of what made me, like, anxious recently.

[Andrew]

Something big is coming. I took a COVID test because I thought I had Covid today, and we almost had to cancel it, but next week's episode is gonna be a movie.

[Drew Phillips]

Literally gonna smell like. We're gonna radiate from the screen. We're figuring that out. We have a few people working on it.

[Andrew]

Yes, ma' am.

[Drew Phillips]

So make sure when you're watching it, you have, like, air freshener or something around. Yeah. Like, light a candle. And that's that. That's it for this episode.

[Andrew]

You know what?

[Drew Phillips]

No media, because you guys don't deserve it. I'm kidding. I did see someone be, like, the. The media sometimes is so whack, and it literally is be. And then they were like, it's. I want to know what they're gatekeeping. And I'm like, no, no.

[Andrew]

Suck my balls.

[Drew Phillips]

Absolutely.

[Andrew]

I'm gatekeeping my balls.

[Drew Phillips]

I think I already said this, but see you soon by Biba Doobie is still, like, on rotation for me. Last Christmas is still. Oh, what is. This is still on rotation for me. A different Corner by George Michael because it's the Wham effect. Duh. And should I give one more? Should I just be silly? Give one more.

[Andrew]

Yeah.

[Drew Phillips]

Tears in the Typing Pool by Broadcast.

[Andrew]

Romeo and Juliet. Oh, I don't know what this is. Romeo and Juliet, Op. 64. Yeah. It's a symphony. You've definitely heard it. I love. I live for that right now. It makes me feel like I'm, like. It's, like, up to something crazy.

[Drew Phillips]

Yeah. I was gonna say it's like the point in the movie where like. Like. Like on some Black Swan where, like, everything's, like, boiling to the top.

[Andrew]

Exactly. And then. Oh, Superman by Lori Anderson. And then I can never remember. Oh, I actually did not mean to do that. I literally. That's so embarrassing. It was the. It was the first. The last thing I searched up on Spotify, and I just started playing I Can't remember.

[Drew Phillips]

We got copyrighted for those exact parts.

[Andrew]

Searching for a Rizzler Rat Pack. What is that song?

[Drew Phillips]

It's Rat Pack. That's literally the name of it.

[Andrew]

Is it searching for.

[Drew Phillips]

I think it's Searching for my Rizzla.

[Andrew]

Searching for my Rizzler yeah, yeah, yeah. Searching for my Rizzler Rat Pack Visual media still on my Survivor. I am going to watch. I forget their name. I think it's John and Kate John.

[Drew Phillips]

And Kate plus eight.

[Andrew]

Yeah, no, I'm gonna. John and Kate. They're like, I watched the.

[Drew Phillips]

Out of that.

[Andrew]

They're comedians online, or they're just comedians, and they have a new show that's coming out, the one that Elsie recommended. Yeah. And I'm gonna watch that, and I'll let you know how it is.

[Drew Phillips]

Well, I'm gonna finish the staircase. I have 30 minutes left of the last up episode. That show's crazy. And I do want to watch the Elvis movie because I just need to know if I hate it or not.

[Andrew]

Yes.

[Drew Phillips]

And that. That's that on that. Oh, before we go. I played Quip Lash with new people, and I bombed, and it was awful.

[Andrew]

Oh, really?

[Drew Phillips]

And literally. And, like, before we started, my friends who were with me were like, oh, my God, she's so good at this game. Like, because her and her friends play it all the time. And I was like, yeah, but, like, I'm really good, like, with my friends because I know their humor so well, and we all know each other's humor. Like, I don't really know. I was with, like, like, kind of new people, and I was like, I don't really know y' all.

[Andrew]

Who was it?

[Drew Phillips]

It was, like, a few friends in New York who, like, I don't think you've met.

[Andrew]

Okay.

[Drew Phillips]

Like, but it was, like, people I've hung out with, like, once or twice, and, like, one of them being, like, at a party, and, like, I've talked to them, but, like, I was like, oh, I don't really know, like, yalls humor that well. So, like, there's a chance, like, I don't really kill it. And I bombed. Like, it was, like, it was not.

[Andrew]

That's.

[Drew Phillips]

So I made a joke that, like, as I typed it out, I was like, they're not going to find this funny at all. And I went to go back out, but I accidentally sent it in.

[Andrew]

And did they know it was you bombing?

[Drew Phillips]

I think so. And I sent it in, and I got an automatic win because the person who went against me didn't have time to put in their answer, and it just, like, made it worse.

[Andrew]

Oh. And everybody's like, who the said that? And I was like, I probably would have won.

[Drew Phillips]

Honestly, I don't think so.

[Andrew]

Yeah, I think Quip Lash is really, really easy for me.

[Drew Phillips]

That's what you. That's what the people are saying.

[Andrew]

Yeah. We have merch coming out on the seventh.

[Drew Phillips]

Oh, my God. Big announcement. You said that with, like, so much excitement.

[Andrew]

Is it on the 7th or is it on the. No, it's on the 9th merch coming out on the 9th.

[Drew Phillips]

Don't tickle my knee.

[Andrew]

I was literally just.

[Drew Phillips]

You're literally fingering my hole, like. Okay. Thank you guys so much for listening and watching and loving and learning and slang.