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Ryan Seacrest
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Drew
Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom. Guys, Today we have really big news.
Inya
Very pissed. We're angry.
Drew
About.
Inya
Wait, do we actually have big news? No, I was like, wait, what am I missing?
Drew
I'm getting the viewers in. I'm getting them ready. You gotta lift them up and then drop them. And then lift them up and then drop them.
Inya
Oh, yeah. It's like Stockholm syndrome.
Drew
Yeah. And then, because they're, like, always craving that lift feeling, they're gonna stick around.
Inya
Keep coming back for more. We've got you in our deep grips, and you can't escape. Escape the universe. You'll start withdrawing. That's basically what Judaism is.
Drew
So you're admitting.
Inya
And this is the high that they get.
Drew
I don't like that the pears you get are soft. Like, in my head. Pears are supposed to be hard.
Inya
No, they're supposed to be, like, creamy.
Drew
No, they're, like, crunchy.
Kai
Dude, they're not supposed to.
Drew
Pears are not creamy.
Kai
That's a rotten fruit.
Inya
No, this is literally not. This is, like, creamy, as.
Drew
I know I'm saying, but pears are supposed to be, like, crunch. But. But I'm thinking of pears you get out of a can in, like, preschool. I haven't eaten a pear.
Kai
You're thinking of baby food.
Drew
I haven't eaten a pear in a very long time, if I'm being honest. Pears always fucked me up because of the gritty texture as a kid. Like, I didn't eat the pears in the fruit.
Inya
I didn't wash this one. It kind of tastes like the dirt it was sewn in or fell onto.
Drew
I don't wash my fruit. I just don't.
Inya
Word.
Drew
I like.
Inya
It's simple.
Drew
I don't. I wash my, like, lettuce and kale and stuff. Because especially kale. Like, dude, actually grosses me out when I, like, spread. Like, I spread her.
Inya
Damn.
Drew
And then I have to wet her, and then I have to, like, go in with my finger and, like, take out all the cows and dead bugs and the dirt that's between leaves. Yeah. And I don't like that, so I will.
Kai
I guess we're gonna get demonetized. Sorry. We can't, like, talk about.
Drew
I'm literally talking about kale.
Inya
Yeah, we're talking about cleaning kale. You have a freaking dirty.
Drew
I know. Not you. Not you sexualizing my food.
Inya
How can you sexualize kale?
Drew
I can make it work. I know you wish.
Inya
I can make that work.
Drew
Literally, me, like. You know, the most sexual food I've eaten recently is when we were at the Renaissance Fair. And that banana, the chocolate covered banana, that thing had a curve. That was annoying.
Inya
Trying to massage your surgery.
Drew
That banana was really gonna have that. I was.
Inya
I was thinking it was an upward curve, too.
Drew
She was.
Inya
It was tantalizing, and it was covered in. They were like, poop. Poop, wiener, dude.
Kai
We know. It was.
Drew
I not making that joke. I literally kept, like, grabbing it and taking it from behind me. Be like.
Kai
And be like guys at the Ren Fair.
Inya
Yeah.
Kai
So beat.
Drew
It was so hot.
Inya
It was the worst environment I've ever.
Kai
98 degrees.
Inya
It was literally. It was 98 degrees dusty. And I was inhaling, like, massive amounts of dust. It felt like the air was Again, the air was thick. It was. It was, like, hard to breathe.
Drew
It felt like Coachella again. I just can't do with, like, dusty areas. People who go to fucking, like, EDC and all these other festivals where you're just, like, out in the dust, in the dirt and, like, Burning Man. Like, literally, bitch. No.
Inya
Me and Kyra. Burning Man.
Drew
Oh, you put that inside. I'm going. He's what?
Inya
He said me and Kyra supposed to DJ Burning man, but he dropped the ball.
Kai
Nine and dropped. We're gonna go.
Drew
When is it?
Inya
Is it in August? It's in August. We're not going.
Drew
We're not going. Just plan for next year and, like, have, like, the big extravaganza. Get your own tent at Burning Man.
Inya
Well, no, that's what it would have been. It would have been the big, extravagant.
Kai
Well, Drew and I are gonna. We're gonna build a sex yurt at Burning Man.
Drew
A what?
Kai
A sex yurt.
Inya
It's just an orgy tent that we've been working on. It's like a yurt, but, like, just bodies on the floor.
Kai
We're working on the design.
Drew
Me. What?
Inya
Hella people.
Kai
It's gonna have its own cryptocurrency. Like, there's gonna be a currency in the town.
Drew
Is it just Drudaism takes Burning Man.
Inya
That's the first time I've heard you say Judaism. Thank you.
Drew
And I'm not gonna lie, saying it out loud, I felt like I was saying something naughty.
Inya
It is.
Drew
I'm confused. Is your religion, like, good for. It's good for when it wants to be.
Inya
No, it's good.
Drew
Okay.
Inya
Ultimately, what you're winking.
Drew
You know there's a video aspect of this podcast.
Inya
There's not.
Drew
Then what are we doing? Oh, this is just for Kai. That's what the video aspect of this is just for Kai.
Inya
He just watches it later. Right? That's what happens.
Drew
No, I was. I was joking. It goes on the Internet.
Kai
It goes on Tick Tock.
Drew
And oh, there's people there sometimes.
Kai
Oh, Drew finding out for the first time. People can see the way that he's sitting.
Drew
I've been on TikTok so much recently that I've had three repeated TikToks show up on my timeline and it's really fucked up.
Kai
Drew's trying to show off his shoes.
Drew
He's trying to show off his.
Inya
Oh, fuck, I wasn't even trying to show that off.
Drew
I'm sure my shoes then. These are vintage miu Mius from 1999. I love them so much. They have this square, almost frog like, toe detail. Kai, there's sand falling out of your shoe.
Inya
Literally fell out of your sneaker.
Drew
Sand fell out of Kai's shoe.
Inya
That was actually. That was a band aid. A three year old band aid for your birthday.
Drew
We were going to re. Okay, so we have this ongoing bit where we're just fucking mean and we like always point at Kai shoes and we're like, damn, girl, you love those shoes. And we're always just bullying him for his shoes.
Kai
I've had these shoes for like three and a half years.
Inya
It is. Would you agree that it's warranted? Like the, the comments?
Kai
Yeah, 100%.
Drew
Okay, so we wanted really bad you the same shoes, but those shoes are.
Inya
So they're $2,000 shoes now.
Kai
Why do you. They're $2,000.
Drew
Some people on grilled are selling them for like $11,000 easy. Like 800, 900.
Kai
Like I bought these for $250.
Drew
Yeah, you got them retail, right? Yeah, dude.
Kai
And I think that they're just like not being made anymore.
Inya
So.
Drew
Yeah, it's all the Kiko as six like go up so much. There's one pair I really want and.
Inya
I'm like, I no, you Don't.
Kai
But yeah, that's why I've been wearing them for three years, is because they're 200 bucks. So I'm like, I'm never going to throw these.
Drew
I mean, you definitely are serving sustainability.
Inya
No, it's giving, like, thank you. It's giving. Cost per wear is now three pennies.
Drew
It's giving. Sand is falling out your.
Inya
That was actually crazy. That was. I know.
Drew
It was so insane.
Inya
It was like. You couldn't have written that. I've just been sitting on my iPhone. That's like, actually crazy. I sat on it and it vibrated and I was like, damn, that felt kind of good. What was that?
Kai
Oh, I have an announcement. We have to do a mid roll ad right now.
Drew
Oh.
Inya
Oh, my God.
Drew
Oh, my God. Okay, guys.
Inya
Okay, one after this break.
Drew
Yeah, we don't. We don't have a sponsor for this section.
Inya
You know what's sponsoring this section? Our Patreon. If you don't want ads, go subscribe to our Patreon.
Drew
Adless episodes.
Inya
Merch coming soon.
Drew
I'm going to hit you in the face.
Inya
I wasn't supposed to say that.
Drew
I'm actually going to punch you in the fucking eye. Is that your bones clapping?
Inya
Yeah, girl. This. I'm done.
Kai
Right now.
Inya
Yeah, simple.
Drew
Should we talk about how I literally died on Thursday night and my back and chest still hurt?
Inya
Oh, no, I have that written down to talk about. I have written down because I was like, I was thinking all week. Like, this week I was thinking a lot of thoughts. Like, it's kind of crazy. Like, look how many I have. Which is not typical. No, that cracked. That broke. That literally just cracked.
Kai
I saw a glass.
Inya
Oh, my God.
Drew
This is a whole week worth of thoughts. And it's literally seven, like mini paragraphs. Like, it's seven two sentences.
Inya
That's literally all I think. That's how much I think about for a week. Okay, the tables have officially turn.
Drew
I'm about to shit myself.
Inya
The tables have turned. Okay, so you know how India is always like. Like, I'm never going to take care of Drew when he's drunk. Like, it's so annoying.
Drew
Like, okay, I never say that.
Inya
Run the clip of her saying, someone make an edit on TikTok of her saying it.
Drew
I say, if you get into a life debilitating accident and I would have to wipe your ass, I would not.
Inya
Be wiping your ass. Paralyzed drunk. Same thing.
Drew
Like, okay, okay, keep going.
Inya
But basically, no, I was the same. Like, simple. Like, it's really easy to just like say it as it is for me, because I was just, like, a good person. Like, I was a saint. Like, I. Not only was I taking care of you, but I was taking care of Josiah, and I left all the fun that I was having behind to take care of my friends.
Drew
You said it like, you had to be dragged away from the party.
Inya
I was.
Drew
By Josiah from the party. Oh, did you want to leave, though?
Inya
No, I actually did not want to leave because I was like, damn, I'm actually having fun, which is like.
Drew
You wanted to leave.
Inya
I had. I just had that little baby buzz going on from the crack cocaine that I snorted in the bathroom. Yeah, well, bleep that out.
Drew
Yeah, don't film me then.
Inya
And I was just having a little fun, and then Josiah projectile vomited everywhere.
Drew
Not in public.
Inya
No, no. In the bathroom. Club in the bathroom. And then he was like, I need to go outside. And I was like, I'm not letting you go outside alone. Like, what? So I, like, followed him outside. And you just, like, projectile vomited all over the floor. We can insert the video if you would, like. Do you want us to insert of Josiah throwing up? Because I recorded him vomiting because I was like, oh, this is good. I record all my friends throwing up because I, like, use it later.
Drew
For what?
Inya
Sex stuff.
Drew
Oh, that. Okay. I was just making sure. I thought you were, like, doing something.
Kai
Oh, you're cool with that?
Drew
What?
Kai
That's weird.
Drew
He's literally being honest. Oh, you want him to lie? You are so weird.
Inya
I'm not going to lie. Okay.
Kai
I'm sorry.
Inya
I'm not a sinner. But, yeah, Josiah vomited everywhere, and so I had to leave the party early, and I was like, you know, I'm a good person. I'll do that. I'll do that for my friends because I love taking care of my friends when they're drunk. And it's really funny because everybody always apologizes when they're drunk. And, like, I'm so sorry for doing this. And I'm like, no. Like, you have no idea how big this is for me because normally I'm the one doing this. But anyways, I'll let you take over and, like, explain your perspective of the night, and then we'll get into my perspective.
Drew
So they left, and, like, I don't even remember really them leaving. I remember texting you for a key, only because I saw it the next day. But, like, I was. It's. I've also gotten to this point where, like, I've said this before. My tolerance is only Going lower as I get older. I don't know what it is. I think it's because, like, we just.
Inya
We just have the purge. Like, we don't drink for two months at a time, and then we purge. And also, it was just like, the perfect storm because it was an open bar.
Drew
Yeah. And to be fair, I did go in with the mindset that I was like, I'm gonna get really drunk. I haven't gotten really drunk in long.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
I'm just gonna do it. And I think I took that a little too serious. Literally. I was drinking so much that the bartenders at an open bar cut me off at an open bar. We're like, all right, you're done. I remember being like, what? Like, oh, my God. And trying to get all my friends to go and get me a drink and, like, following right behind them. And the bartenders were like, I see her. Like, you're right.
Inya
See the type of person that you are. You're trying to be slick when you're, like, blacked out.
Drew
Yeah.
Inya
I just don't remember hiding behind the wall.
Drew
No. I was literally. What's worse is I wasn't hiding. I was. I would go, like, I got Masons. I go get me a margarita. And I was just right behind him.
Inya
You're so stupid.
Drew
And at this point, the bar had kind of, like, emptied out, so, like, it was very obvious that the drink was for me, but that's besides the point. They left, and me, Mason, Zamar, and Jester stayed behind.
Inya
And, like, me and Josiah being there.
Drew
Yeah. And we just, like, stayed bind. And we. I don't even think we stayed that long. My perception of time is, like, very lost. Like, this very.
Inya
Y' all. Y' all were there for, like, 45 minutes longer to an hour.
Drew
Yeah. So we were just there. Like, I was just, like, chatting it up, dancing a little bit, running around this bar, going to the bathroom, taking photos of myself, following people around. Like, literally just, like, hobbling around, just drunkenly.
Inya
Oh. When I was leaving. It's crazy being, like, semi sober and seeing, like, people, like, be super up. And, like, when I was leaving, I was like, oh, like, India, you're. You're drunk. Drunk. I was like, you're gonna have a bad morning. And I was like, I shouldn't be leaving India, but she's with Mason and Zamar. She'll, like, get home. Like, it'll be fine.
Drew
Yeah.
Inya
And then I texted you, and I was like, do you want me to come get you? Because, like, I don't want you Like.
Drew
I never saw that text.
Inya
But yeah, I was like, I was like, I. And then when I got home, I was. I sent any of that text in my Uber and I was like, I'm gonna get my car and come get you because you're, like, pretty drunk. And then like, when I sat down on the couch when I got home and I was like, oh, fuck. Like, I'm still a little drunk. Like, I'm not getting behind the wheel. And if you asked me to drive, I would have been like, no, no, I did find your way home.
Drew
So basically, like, the bar literally started closing and we started getting empty out. And then Zamar Mason were like, planning on going somewhere else. I was like, bitch, I'm not going anywhere else. Like, I'm going home. Like, me and Jester need to go home. So I don't know how I accomplished this, but I called a two way stop Uber and I got Jester home.
Inya
One thing about you when you're drunk is you're gonna be able to call an Uber. Like, you. That is your superpowers when you're drunk, you can call an Uber.
Drew
I know. I don't know how I got to a two stop Uber. Like, I don't know how I did that, but I got an Uber home. I remember feeling fine in the Uber. I don't remember that ride at all. I don't remember, like, I don't remember the conversations I was having at all. Like, I don't remember.
Inya
Sorry, I keep interjecting, but I feel like this is like a universal experience. And I don't know if it is, but I feel like it is. But like, when you get into an Uber and you're drunk, do you not get 30 times more drunk in the Uber ride home? Like, you, like, get exponentially worse. Like, every single time I've ever, like, been like, obliterated to the point where I'm like, throwing up is like, I'm fine.
Drew
Uber is what catapults.
Inya
It's fine until I get into the Uber. And then when I'm in that fucking Uber, I like, deteriorate for the worst. And maybe it's just like, I'm not dancing and having fun anymore and I'm like, alone with my thoughts and like, I'm like, holy. I'm like, spinning and you're like, actually, like, still. But I don't know. But yeah, when I get into the Ubers, when I'm super drunk, just everything goes wrong.
Drew
Like, I really. I literally don't even remember the stop to Jester's.
Inya
House?
Drew
Yeah, Like, I don't remember it.
Inya
Like, I don't even remember y' all saying y' all stopped.
Drew
I don't remember. I just don't. I remember being in a. I remember getting into a car. Like, I. I don't even remember getting into the car. I don't remember calling the Uber. Like, I just. I know I ended up home, and then I don't really remember, like, too much from when I got home.
Inya
I'll pick up. Okay.
Ryan Seacrest
Okay.
Inya
So Inya, Mason and Zamar got home, and me and Josiah were, like. I had just, like, got taken care of Josiah. He just finished throwing up. I got him his Saltines and his Advil and his electrolytes, and I was like, you just need to drink some water and sit. And he was starting to feel better. And we were just sitting on the couch watching, like, Planet Earth or something, because I was like, that's, like, calming. Like, Josiah will be fine with that. And he was, like, sobering up a little bit and, like, cognitive. And then y' all got home, and y' all were the loudest people I have ever heard in my entire life. Like, running up the stairs, like, falling halfway down. Like, Mason was, like, picking you up. And, like, I had just bought in this, like, Diptyque diffuser thing that, like, is not cheap. Like, it was expensive, but it works really good. And, like, Diptych, you should sponsor me for giving you the shout out.
Drew
But.
Inya
But it's like a. It's a glass vase with oil in it and then those sticks that stick out at the top. And Mason picked up Inya and, like, she, like, bumped into that diffuser and it fell, like, three and a half feet onto the ground and spilled oil, like, scent oil everywhere, all over everything. Which, like, isn't that bad, but, like, it's a very potent oil. So, like, right when it happened, I was like, oh, my God, this is, like, almost worse than having our steroids smell like cat piss. Liter. This is super potent. Whatever. And he was apologizing, and I was like, girl, it's fine. Like, you're just having fun. Like, it's all good. Like, I promise. She's like, I'm going to pay for. I'm going to pay for it in the morning. Like, you were slurring your words. And I was like, you're not going to pay for the worst part about being drunk.
Drew
And that's why I really am tapping out. I'm just going to be, like, a bit of a little stoney type beat girl, because that is the worst part about being drunk to me is like, it will not be like not being able to use my human vocabulary.
Inya
It was crazy. And like, you were like, you're like, how much is it? How much is? I say, I'm not telling you how much is. And you're like, I'm going to send you 15 bucks. And I was like, that's not.
Drew
Saying, like 50 to like, cover maybe half of it.
Inya
Because I don't.
Drew
I don't think I would. I. As drunk as I am, like, I'm a material girl. Like, I know that thing is not.
Inya
$30, but anyways, she eventually got on the couch and Mason and Zamar were bullying the fuck out of you. It was crazy. I was like, damn, they're going in.
Drew
As I was so drunk, I don't remember a word.
Inya
But the thing is, is like, it's deserving because when we're all in that position, you are mean as fuck to us. Like, you do take care of us, but you do, like, you are like, like roll your eyes type vibe at us when we're super drunk. But they kind of took it to another level and I was just like. I looked at you on the couch and you were like, I have a video of it too that we can.
Drew
No, I'm not kidding. No, I don't know.
Inya
Just.
Drew
I can't see it. No.
Inya
A two second video.
Drew
No, I'm not kidding. Like, I Genuinely not kidding. Like, I. I refuse. Like, literally, like, I would rather die on my deathbed. That's embarrassing. Like, no, I, Like, I'd rather die. Like, I'm not.
Inya
The girls are gonna beg for it.
Drew
I haven't even seen it. And that's what makes it.
Inya
I haven't seen it. It's the one of you eating the saltine on the couch. I showed you.
Drew
I know, dude. Hell no.
Inya
That's so sick. I love it.
Drew
Also, like, the top I was in is like, too much. I. I don't want, Like, I. I didn't even.
Inya
Oh, I didn't even see your booby, honestly.
Drew
Yeah, no, my boobs are like, out in that.
Inya
We can crop it.
Drew
No, it's not going.
Inya
But yeah, and it was like wobbling back and forth and I just like, sat there and looked at her and I was like, oh, no. Like, she's. She's bad. Like, this isn't like fun drunk anymore. When I was leaving and a little bit worried, I was like, I'm a. I'm a lot of it worried. I was like, she's in for, like, a night of hell. Because I know that feeling when you're, like, laying on the couch and you're, like, kind of, like, spinning and, like, nodding and, like, trying to crazy.
Drew
I don't remember. Like, I genuinely. For the first time in, like, so long and maybe, like, three years of my life, I think I was, like, the closest I'd been to, like, fully blacking out.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
Josiah was like, a handful of things, but I, like, don't remember. I don't remember even ever sitting on the couch.
Inya
Yeah. So I think, like, the. The cool word to use is browning out, where you can, like, remember a little bit, but not a lot. And then also what you do to the toilet, you make brown, but you were rocking back and forth on the couch. And then you're, like, very neurotic still. Like, even after you're, like, completely plastered, like, your brain is on 2%, you're super neurotic. And you're like, I need to get in the shower. Like, I need to shower. And I was like, oh, she's going to go shower. Maybe she's feeling okay. And you, like, hobbled to the bathroom. And, like, the shower was running, but I could tell no one was in it. No, no, the shower wasn't even running.
Drew
The shower was.
Inya
And, like, Mason and Zamar were like, where the fuck is in you? Like, we're going out. And I was like. I was like, she's in the shower. She's tapping out. Like, y' all go ahead. And she was like, whoever said she's showering is a damn lie. Like, you are not. You were not showering. You were sitting over the toilet, like, preparing to. Preparing to, like, throw up. And, like, right when I opened the door, you projectile vomited all over the floor, all over the side of the toilet, underneath the, like, second toilet lid. Like, and it was not pretty vomit. It was gross. And I, like, immediately was like. I was like, yes. Like, this is my moment. Like, I get to take care of you and say I took care of you when you were at your worst. And, like, also, you brought us something the next day. But it's crazy how you were literally ass naked and, like, how close we are now because, like, oh, yeah.
Drew
To clarify, like, I had gotten in the bathroom and I really was gonna shower, but I think I got butt, ass naked, went to pee, and was on the toilet and then was like, like, oh, I don't feel good. So then I just, like, kind of, like, sank to the floor. Like, I don't remember. I don't remember getting onto the floor.
Inya
You know what you said? It's so funny. You were like. You, like, threw up. And you were like, I'm also pissing all over myself. And you kept saying.
Drew
I, like, went to pee. And I was like, dude, I don't. I think I did finish peeing, but I don't think I got a chance to wipe. Yeah, Like, I think I literally was, like, done peeing. And before I even got a chance to, I was like, oh, my God, I'm gonna throw up.
Inya
You're like, I'm pissing myself. But you weren't crying, which is very surprising because you were so scared of throwing up, you were laughing your ass off. And then I was like, oh, maybe I should get a video of Anya throwing up. So, like, just in case we could use it. And then she started. She kept throwing up, and I was like, oh, no. Like, this isn't a pretty throw up anymore. Like, this is, like, busting open your blood vessels in your eyes.
Drew
It was so bad. Like, I have, like, blood vessels, like, on this eye, I have a burst of blood vessel, like, in my eyeball. And then under my eyes, I have, like, little specks and, like, around my face. Like, it was literally, like.
Inya
It was violent.
Drew
So bad. But I was. That is also, like, thank God I was that drunk, because that's why I never throw up, even when I get really drunk, is because I'm so terrified. Like, I will just hold it down and suffer like, an extra day and a half of, like, this weird hangover and, like, just shitting my fucking brains out.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
Because I'd rather shit than throw up. This is so gross. I'd rather, like, just shit than throw up. And I was just so drunk that it, like, came out. And I do remember cracking. Ew.
Inya
What?
Drew
Y' all are, like, flirting with each other. I'm literally talking about shitting and throwing up.
Inya
I mentioned earlier that I like shit.
Kai
And I also get horny when I hear about girls shitting, so.
Inya
Oh, and I mentioned that I say videos for vomiting. Yeah. For sex stuff.
Drew
But I do remember cracking up because I just wanna.
Inya
There's like, a smell. Y' all smell that?
Drew
No.
Inya
Maybe me being paranoid about gas leak. We need to get into that next.
Drew
But I was just.
Kai
So it's definitely the trash.
Drew
Yeah.
Inya
No, it's definitely a gas leak and we're all gonna die in a fire. It's gonna explode and we're all gonna die. But that's not trash. But I know what trash juice smells like. That is not that you're so weird.
Drew
Anyways, I do remember cracking up because I was literally butt ass naked. And the second Drew came in, I know I threw up. And I was just laughing because I was just like, dude, I literally, like, I. I do remember being like, I couldn't even finish pissing.
Inya
Like, I literally am gonna, like, pissing all over myself. And then also, I want to verify.
Drew
I wasn't actually peeing all over the floor. But I think what it was is I had so much pressure coming up, and I didn't get to finish peeing. I was like, I am going to piss myself, because I do remember drunkenly hobbling in the shower, because I did shower after that because I was covered in my own vomit. Yeah, I do remember peeing in the shower.
Inya
Yeah. Okay. And then while she was throwing up, I was like, oh, fudge. I don't want them to hear because they're already on your ass. So I like, turned on the shower, like, started running cold water in the shower. And then I was like, here, I'm going to go get you water. Like, hop into the shower. And I like, went and got you. That's the other thing is you asked me for water, like, a hundred times, and you just had, like, four glasses, like, sitting around you. Like, it was crazy.
Drew
I'm really bad. That's also why I, like, can't survive.
Inya
Okay. No, There is, like, an actual smell.
Drew
It's literally me, I myself.
Inya
Oh, you did?
Drew
No.
Inya
Why did you not say anything?
Drew
Because I was nervous. I was, like, embarrassed.
Inya
It's okay. Like, we all do that.
Drew
I do have my diaper on.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
So it's being caught. That's in my jeans.
Inya
Can I have the diaper paper?
Drew
No.
Inya
Okay.
Drew
It's a reusable one, so I have to wash it.
Inya
I'm, like, scared. Is this my breath that I'm smelling? Like, it's, like, actual human.
Drew
I don't smell other than, like, I don't smell.
Kai
I just smell the normal trash smell that's in this kitchen.
Inya
The normal stench that irradiates.
Drew
To verify that stench, me and Drew get a vegan probiotic yogurt that actually smells like curdle cheese, but it tastes so gross that I don't stop. Yesterday, I left it in a bowl, and it actually smelled like real rotten cheese. And I was like, this is science has gone too far.
Inya
Did either of one of y' all fart?
Drew
No.
Inya
No.
Drew
Like, if I farted, I would have myself.
Inya
I didn't know how did you fart earlier?
Kai
I Didn't. No.
Inya
Oh, my God. What is.
Kai
But now you're scaring me because I was with somebody the other day that I was in the car with them, and they were like, oh, it smells like. I was like, I didn't.
Inya
You smell like. No, it's definitely. I think it's just like, bathroom smell. But where the Were we in this story? Yes, this is the. The girl that ended the oil that I spilled.
Drew
Not the oil spill.
Inya
The literally causing an oil. That's actually crazy. So.
Drew
But yeah, so we're to like, I got. You got me a bunch of water and I got in the shower. I don't know how I didn't bust my ass and die in the shower.
Inya
The craziest thing is I ran the coldest water possible. And, like, you kind of just got in there and then turned on the hot water. Like, you were in the coldest water I've ever felt in my life. Like. Or am I like, yeah, like, I ran purely cold water. And then after, I was like, did you just take a cold shower? And you're like, no. Like, I got in and turned on the hot. I realized it was cold and I turned on the hot water and I was like, holy. That water was like, there was no hot water because I was like, I'm not running all the hot water dry, so people can't shower in hot water. But anyways, I get you water. You're, like, showering. I like, check up on you a couple times. And then Josh and Josiah are, like, on the couch in the living room. I'm like, y' all literally have to go. Cuz, like, I don't think Anya's gonna be clothed when she walks out of here. So, like, y' all need to go to Josh's room or my room and just hang out for a second. And they're like, oh, fuck yeah. Because at this time, they were like, dude, that India's, like, really up. Like, it was crazy. Still laughing. But at this point, you were kind of like, not feeling anymore. You're, like, over it. And so you hobbled out. I don't. I didn't see if you were naked or not.
Drew
I think I did have a towel, but I didn't put clothes on on.
Inya
So in your hobbles to. To her bedroom and lays down, I go get you another water, cuz you beg me for another water. At this point, you weren't having fun. You were like, literally, like, I'm dying. Like, you're like, I think I'm going to die. And literally I'm dying right now. No, it was, it was so crazy. So I leave to go, like talk to Josh and Josiah about it for like five minutes. And then I hear from the other side of the house like, drew, Drew, like shaky, like fragile voice. And I like run over there and I'm like, what? And like you like point to the ground and it's like pitch dark in your room. And I'm like, what did you just do?
Kai
It's so Phil Diape even.
Inya
No, it was crazy. She pointed to the ground and I saw like a glisten of light because the moon was hitting it beautifully. And then I was like, hey, Siri, turn on the lights. And I see just like Inya threw up all over the ground, all over her comforter, all over her iPad.
Drew
Like it was all over my iPad. And I remember that made me laugh again. I started laughing again because also as you got closer, I started throwing up again. Like I started literally, like I couldn't stop myself. And also to clarify on my end, I got in bed and got under the covers and I had the spin so badly. I just remember getting under the covers. I mean like, I'm going the fuck to sleep. Like I'm like actually like passing away right now. And then I woke up choking on my vomit. Like I remember waking up and like just like coughing. And I think that's why like so much of my throat and back hurts, because I was just like literally choking all night because I just was choking on my vomit. And the reason it got all over the side of my floor in bed is because I just like turned myself over.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
Which thank God I was able to do.
Inya
Yeah. I would have been in the other room talking shit about her to Josh and Josiah. And then I come in there five hours later and she's just blue and dead on her bed. Cuz she choked on her vomit. But anyways, I run and go get her her salad bowl and I set it beside her. I get her another water. Cuz she knocked over her water while she was doing this. And she's like, she's like, drew, can you sleep in here tonight? And I'm like.
Kai
You finally got to hit.
Inya
I know. I finally smashed. Like it was crazy. No, it was me getting asked for once instead of me asking.
Drew
You know, I literally thought I was going to die.
Inya
I know. It was like when I asked to sleep in the room on an air mattress that one time when I was really fudged up. Yeah. It was like that same vibe where I was like, I just need someone to, like, keep an eye on me. Like, I just, I can't, like, be alone right now. And I'm glad she asked me to because also, she was butt ass naked. And I didn't realize this until the next morning, but India was ass naked and we just shared the bed together. Another reason why we're too close, which is like, crazy. But I didn't realize it until she told me the next day. But. And I also did sleep on top of the covers because I was like, I don't want her to throw up and it like, me not have a good exit. So this is where it gets actually insane. This is where it gets really gnarly and scary. So Inya is like, also still being erotic and she's like, begging. She's like, drew, I need to go shower. I literally need to go shower. I, like, threw up all over myself.
Drew
Since my hair was still wet from the shower. My hair is now at the length that if it is wet and I turn over, all my hair just covers my face and gets around my mouth. So I threw up in my hair.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
And like, it was literally like, I was just like, like the, like left side of my hair was just drenched in vomit.
Inya
Granted, it. It was pure water at this point. There was one throw up in my.
Drew
Jugs of water that I had been drinking.
Inya
Yeah, there was one throw up that wasn't water. But that was when she threw up all over her iPad. And that was a little chunky still. But anyways, she's laying in bed.
Drew
She's such a champ for being able to clean all that vomit. Because I will say, like, kudos to you. I woke up the next day and the only sign of vomit was in my salad bowl.
Inya
I was cleaning up all the vomit as I was going, and he was begging to go take a shower. And I was like, I swear to God, Inya, if you just hang one foot off the side of the bed, close your eyes, you'll fall asleep and you will never think. You won't think about the shower for again. You're too nauseous. Like, you'll throw up on the way. You'll collapse on the way. You'll drown in the shower. Not letting you get in the shower because, like, she actually genuinely was, like, at this point, like, kind of concerning. Like, I was texting Josiah and everybody. I was like, I may take her to the hospital because, like, this is where it gets scary. It's like, so. And you finally, like, knocked out. Like, she knocked out almost immediately, but.
Drew
I need to shower.
Inya
Yeah. And then just snoop, like, snooze. And my biggest fear was, like, her. Me falling asleep next to her and then her choking on her vomit in her sleep. So, like, she fell asleep laying straight up. And, like, I don't know if you have sleep apnea or what, but, like, you would stop breathing for like, 30 seconds at a time. And I was like, oh, my God. Like, this is like, not chill. Like, I'm gonna have to be up all night to make sure she doesn't die in her sleep. So, like, I would, like, periodically, like, as you were sleeping, I would, like, roll you over onto your side, like, to hang off the bed. And then at one point I was like, that's too much work. I'm just gonna pull you towards me to, like, sleep. And if you throw up on my face, I don't give a fuck. I just don't want you to die. And, like, there were. I took several videos of you snoring because, like, it's crazy the different types of snores she had. Like, there was one that was like a death rattle where I was like, oh, this bitch is literally, like, choking on her vomit, like, as we speak. Then there was one where, like, it was like a healthy snore. And then there was one where it's just silence and Azul purring. And I recorded this silence because I was like, this is Inya not breathing. And there were several times when I would, like, put my fingers, like, under your nose, because I just put it, like, between my legs, like on my gooch. And I wanted you to smell my gooch grease. No, because I was, like, making sure you were breathing.
Drew
My gooch grease.
Inya
But I. Yeah, we just making sure you weren't vomiting and throwing up in your sleep. So you weren't choking. Yeah, exactly. And I was. I stayed up till like, 6:30 in the morning. And then eventually I just, like, knocked the fuck out. And then I had to wake up two hours earlier because the last episode of the podcast was a nightmare to get up. It was literally hell.
Drew
Drew saved the day. But, yeah, I just woke up and I felt awful. And I spent the day just, like, feeling dead.
Inya
Like, you slept all day?
Drew
Yeah, I slept all day. Like, I felt so bad. Also, it was Kai's birthday, so I was like, I literally need to sleep so that I could be, like, alive at Kai's birthday dinner. And I remember I. Like, the worst part about, like, hangovers for me is like, I can't get a good sleep, which I know, like, alcohol fully Disrupts your sleep. And so it makes sense. But, like, I sleep all day, but it's in increments. And I remember I woke up at, like, 11, and I just could not go back to sleep at all. And I was like, whatever, I'm just gonna thug it out and, like, fucking stay up and, like, try to, like, live my day. And I just felt so nauseous, but I couldn't get any water in my mouth because I was like, dude, I'm gonna throw up. Like I said, I still feel so bad. And then at one point, I got up and moved to the couch because I was like, I'm gonna. Like, I had slept for two more hours, and I was like, okay, I'm gonna get up. Like, I have to, like, just shower and, like, keep moving with my day. And I got on the couch, and I literally was like, oh, I'm gonna throw up again. And then I threw up again and took some nausea medicine after that, and I felt like a corpse. And I was. What made me throw up again was because I, like, obviously I'm, like, terrified of throwing up. And I would have sat there and gagged probably for, like, 30 minutes, because Drew, Josh, and Josiah went to go get me medicine and, like, Gatorade and stuff. But I was like, before I shower, I, like, need to clean my sheets. I need to put my sheets to wash. I need to clean my vomit iPad. Like, I need to clean up, like, all the places I vomited so that I'm not just, like, showering and then getting back in my vomit bed. So I went to go do all that, and I looked at my vomit bowl and picked it up to go clean it, and I looked in it, and it literally made me gag so hard that I just immediately threw up.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
Which. Thank God. Thank God for my big salad bowl. And guess what? I ate out of that bowl yesterday and the day before that.
Inya
And it just adds flavor. It adds, like, an acidic flavor.
Drew
Like, what? It's a glass bowl. I cleaned it.
Inya
Yeah, that's.
Drew
So I fucked up, too, because that day, I bought a soup that I really like when I'm hungover, but it actually was just as acidic. It tasted exactly like my vomit, so I couldn't. And then I went to Kai's dinner, and I felt like I did not.
Inya
Feel real, Dude, I was dying at that dinner, too. It was crazy. And I wasn't hungover. I was just like. I felt so, like.
Drew
Well, also, you stayed up all night to make sure.
Inya
Oh, yeah, literally. And I didn't sleep all day. That's. I forgot. That's literally what it was.
Kai
After my birthday dinner, every single person I invited came up to me and said, like, that sucked. Like, yeah, I felt terrible during that. Yeah, they got in a line.
Inya
It wasn't. It literally wasn't. You, like, your birthday dinner? It was just, like. I think we all had rough nights.
Kai
I feel like after the dinner, you came up to me and said I shouldn't even come. Like, I don't even with you.
Inya
That was different. That was. That was like.
Kai
I mean, that's different.
Drew
That's different because the food was good and there was other people other than you there, so it was fun.
Kai
Yeah, I guess you're right.
Inya
And the girls, like, were twerking and.
Kai
Oh, yeah, I met all those girls.
Drew
I was the only woman at the.
Inya
Table, and it was literally the only girl.
Drew
I was the Lone star soldier.
Inya
But speaking of not sleeping, last night, I, like, in the middle of the night, I woke up. I was dripping sweat. Like, I've never sweated in my. Like, it was crazy. Like, my entire body was, like, also taking the context.
Drew
He just woke up in today and put clothes on and moved on.
Inya
No, this. I slept in this shirt, but literally was, like, the sweatiest I have ever been in my entire life. Like, it was. It was actually, like, a little alarming because it was, like, dripping off my face, and I was like, I'm not hot. It's, like, not that hot in here. Like, what is going on? And then, like, I was like, whatever. Like, I'll go back to sleep and not think anything about it. Like, it was so much about that I thought I pissed myself. Like, I was like, what the is happening? Went back to sleep. But I normally sleep, like, on my back like a coffin, like a. Like a freakazoid. But I went back to sleep on my arm. Like, I fell asleep, like, on my side. And, like, I woke up maybe an hour later with my arm, like, completely dead. Like, I genuinely thought that I had killed my arm in my sleep. That, like, I just cut the blood supply off for so long that my arm died that I, like. I, like, jumped out of bed and I, like, ran into the middle of the room, and I, like. I, like, was, like, trying to move it, and I couldn't move it, and I was trying to move my fingers, and I couldn't move it, and I had to grab my arm and. And, like, wave it around in a circle to, like, get the blood to go into it. And it was like, me, as a.
Drew
24 year old man.
Inya
I was so. I was literally so scared. I was like, holy shit. Like, I just killed my arm. Like it's going to fall off my body.
Drew
See, that's where you and me are different. Because when I am sleeping, I am in such a deep sleep, I couldn't give a fuck what the fuck is happening. Like, I could wake up and both of my legs could be amputated. I just go back to sleep. I'd be like. I'd be like. I would literally be like, I can't fix that right now. And that's okay because I'm like, sleep feels good. I love sleeping.
Inya
I'm like a heavy sleeper, but I'm an anxious sleeper. Like, there's always something that's going wrong.
Kai
Have you tried playing with your little worm with your dead arm?
Inya
It's not a little worm. It was actually really crazy because it felt like someone else was playing with my big worm member.
Drew
But yeah, I will sleep through anything. Like, I've like, like slept through flights. I've slept through things I've been excited for for three weeks. Just because I'm like, this feels so good. I couldn't give a. Like, honestly, like the. The excitement of whatever I had to do this morning could suck my balls.
Inya
I am the complete opposite. Like, complete opposite. I'm so scared that I slept through everything. It's crazy. But, you know, there is something that I did find out. It kind of like goes off of something we said in like a past episode. It was like a question that I asked you and you know how you told us that girls, like, don't play video games? Like, you don't even know what a video game is.
Drew
No.
Inya
Well, I found out that they made this game called Cooking Mama, which is like a video game for girls.
Drew
No, but that's not a video game. That was preparation for life. It was like we had to take that in school. It was a class.
Inya
Oh, it was like training.
Drew
Yeah, that was just training.
Inya
Oh, okay. Wait, is.
Drew
Do you. Do you guys call. Do guys call that a game?
Inya
Well, yeah. Yeah, cuz it's like men don't cook. Like, it's. It's like.
Drew
Do you have like, like, like Building house and like caring stuff for girls games?
Inya
No, we have like kill people games, like war games.
Kai
We have. We have a being the President game.
Inya
Yeah. Oh my God.
Drew
There's actually going to be a female president next year.
Kai
Leaked info.
Inya
What the fuck was that?
Drew
Next year something big is happening.
Inya
That was insane.
Drew
What if Joe Biden dies next year and I'M the one who predicted that.
Inya
Are you saying be president?
Drew
No, I'm saying Kamala Harris.
Inya
Would you say Neopets is a game made for girls? Because, like, you're taking care of. Taking care of primal, instinctual, like, yeah, Tamagotchi vibe, you know.
Drew
Oh, I'm at level 112 on Fortnite.
Kai
That's just my congratulations.
Drew
And I have so many skins.
Inya
The last two times that I've played Call of Duty and Fortnite and I'm really scared cuz I'm giving it the three time rule. I was like, I'm not having fun. Like this is not fun for me anymore. Like it became too serious.
Kai
It's because you're an adult now. It's like the Polar Express. Like soon you're not going to be able to hear it anymore.
Inya
Oh my God, don't say that.
Kai
I'm serious.
Inya
You know, that's actually something really cute that my mom did is she made jingle bells that like, had like, that were given to us by Santa. And when you would shake them, you would hear them jingle. And my mom and dad would shake them and they would act like they didn't hear them jingle. And they were like, it's because you'll still believe. And I'm doing that to my kids.
Kai
The last time we played Fortnite, you guys both died and I was the last one alive. And you know, you can like see my screen. Yeah, I like tried to kill a guy and I up.
Inya
Oh my God. Yeah, I was watching you.
Kai
Literally. Drew goes. That was really bad. I have to go and just like logged off and I just sat there at my computer for like two minutes and I just like, got my phone and I was like, I don't even want to look at anything on my phone. And I just got up and like stood outside for a second.
Inya
Had to get some fresh airplay today. No, see, I played with Zamar and.
Drew
Mason yesterday and it was actually so fucking funny.
Inya
Dude, y' all were having so much fun. I was so jealous. I go on one date, Kai. I go on one date and I get excommunicated from the entire group. They. They took my spot.
Drew
And because Drew went on a solo social expedition, he literally had to come home and decompress in his room for seven hours on TikTok. Like, he was in his room. I am not kidding. I spent the whole day with Josh on the couch and I didn't see through until it was time for him to take a bath. And then, even then he, I. He told me he wanted McDonald's and I was gonna order it, so I ordered us both McDonald's. He took a bath and went back to his room. And I had to call him and be like, yo, your food is here. Like. And he sent me like, TikTok.
Kai
I can imagine that so viscerally in my mind's eye. Like Drew swinging open the door and just running upstairs, lying on his bed in the same position.
Drew
He didn't even talk to me about it. He just came and grabbed a few pieces of candy and went to his room for seven hours.
Inya
And then you came in there and you were like, this is what you brought on your date. And it was Nerds Clusters.
Drew
It was Nerds Clusters. His Airpod Maximum Pros, which is, why are you bringing your headphones? You're not going to put them on while you're with the person. And then it was the home do or whatever the fuck book.
Inya
Yeah, Homo Days. Deuce.
Drew
Homo.
Kai
Do you write your existentialism book?
Inya
Yeah, I was reading it before because I got there early.
Drew
And that's what he brought on his fucking day.
Kai
To put you in the worst mood possible.
Inya
Yeah, it was. It was a crazy, crazy vibe. I'm just lit. But what were we saying before that?
Drew
I don't even know. Oh, because your fucking dumbass is like.
Inya
I get socially, like, pushed away, but he literally, like, people get jealous of me when I don't give them my time. When I don't give them my time, I get pushed away. And it's. It's fair, cuz, like, I understand. I'm like a sweet person.
Drew
Like, he literally sent me an audio message and tiktoks from his room and didn't. Like, I hadn't spoken him all day. Like, I had it. I literally hadn't seen you all day.
Inya
I know. I just couldn't. I literally just. I have to decompress.
Drew
And then me and Drew were trying to get him to watch something with us, and we backed up for him and he watched two seconds of it and then left. And then me and Josh sat on the couch and we were like, is he tapping out? Josh was like, yeah, I think he's tapping out.
Inya
Yeah. I just didn't. I was over. I was. That literally made me cry so bad because, like, I was in bed and I was like. It was like 9pm or something, and I was like, I have been on my phone for. I have been alone for so long and it feels so good. And like. And then I just. I'm. That's so funny. That you fucking brought that up.
Drew
But me and Josh were literally having major stinkling. We hung out for, like, yeah, two days.
Inya
Y' all did hang out hardcore. It was really, really awesome. But I was saying that I. Fortnite and Call of Duty are both not fun to me anymore, which is, like, really fucking sad. And, like, I'm gonna give it one more try. Like, each game, one more try. I'm gonna play Call of Duty today and probably Fortnite tonight, and if I don't have, like, the blast that I was having, like, a week ago, I'm never playing.
Drew
Let's see if Mason and Zamar want to play.
Inya
Yeah, because that's the other thing is I'd be. I take that shit way too serious. Like, it's like. It's like. It's not a game for me anymore. Like, it's.
Kai
It's like, when I up, you went. That was really bad.
Inya
No, I just don't play. Don't play.
Drew
Don't get offended. Drew literally, like, when he doesn't have a bad, like, a good game, he's like, no, I actually don't want to.
Inya
Play this right now.
Kai
That's completely normal. I'm the same way.
Inya
No, it's. It's crazy because I just. I like hearing people, like, yell at each other in the game. Like, I was hearing, like, the way our, like, all of our friends were, like, talking to each other through the mic, and I was like, like, damn, we're mean to each other. Like, I know we have a friend.
Drew
Who literally yells at you, and I'm like, stop yelling at me.
Inya
I'm gonna slap you. I literally love it so much, like, hearing it, because then, like, it. You get out of the game.
Kai
You're supposed to be toxic when you play video.
Inya
Exactly.
Drew
Samar is really good with being yelled at, though, because he's like, girl, you.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
And he will just do the opposite. Like, Jamar literally, like, our friend kept being like, why are you even playing with us? You're playing your own game right now. Like, literally, it was, like, me, Mason, our friend, and we were, like, all on, like, staying in our little trio, and we'd be like, where is Zamar? And you look at the map, and Samar is, like, like, fucking 500 meters away. And he's like, oh, there's a team right here. I'm killing them. And then he, like, two seconds there, he's like, I'm down.
Ryan Seacrest
Hurry.
Inya
Someone come get me. Come get me, Come get me, Come get me. Yeah, I just remember the clip that Kai was. It was the worst display of gaming I've ever seen in my life. I just had to say that. Oh, I'll. I'll get. I'll get to reading some of.
Drew
Yeah, let's get into these, like, really intuitive notes that you've been okay writing for the past week.
Inya
I probably on Tuesday or no, it was probably Wednesday when I did this, but it was like. It was after the podcast, but I was like laying in bed and I saw this tick tock of like, I had known this had existed for a very long time, but I hadn't like, experienced it as an adult. I normally, like, experience. I experienced it when I was like, like 16 or 17 in like existential dread, like, depersonalized mode where I thought I was an alien, like, mode. And I was like, oh, I want to like, see what this is like now. And I laid in bed for literally like an hour to an hour and a half listening to the sounds of like a black hole. And I just like, was thinking, like, about everything it was up. But like, the sounds are really, like, honestly therapeutic back then. They were really scary, but like, I was re listening to them and it's like, it's really ominous. It sounds like the end of the world.
Drew
I don't know how they got like. Do you think they mic'd my pants? Like, how did they get that audio?
Inya
Yeah, they mic'd your Kuchiyana. Your.
Drew
You're.
Inya
You're whispering.
Kai
I just don't like. They're lying, right?
Drew
It's literally just an untitled Alex G track.
Kai
Yeah, they're just like. They just slowed down a beach place.
Drew
Literally just untitled.
Inya
It was on the NASA website.
Kai
They would do those super slow Justin Bieber.
Inya
Yeah. Sounded like demons.
Drew
No, this is good. I get it.
Inya
Yeah, it was. It was really nice, actually.
Drew
This is literally a silent 2. Silent Hill 2 soundtrack.
Inya
Damn. That's actually crazy. That's literally what it is.
Drew
And I love that soundtrack. I gotta play Silent Hill again.
Inya
Damn, dude, it's literally hypnotizing me already.
Kai
It's like, actually wasn't there for like 10 seconds.
Inya
No, but I was doing some of that. I was like listening to the sounds of a black hole and it was honestly, like, meditative. Like, it like cleared my brain. What?
Kai
Did you see Mason's story the other night when he was like, last night I was on autopilot. That wasn't me.
Drew
Yeah, he was literally your dinner.
Kai
Yeah, it's not my birthday.
Inya
Him subtweeting us on his story?
Drew
No, him. That was him, like, being Embarrassed. And he didn't want to like reach out to all of us because he knows. Oh, cop that.
Inya
It's really expensive though.
Drew
What?
Inya
No, it's 50 bucks for a CD. I'm not spending $50 in a CD.
Drew
Okay? Me. When I have no idea what it's like to collect cool CDs.
Inya
Oh no. You know what's crazy is I was on Discogs and like it was right when you started collecting all your CDs. And I was like, damn, I want to like start a CD collection. And I added like probably 100 CDs to my cart. And I was like, I was like, oh, like what is this going to be like 250 bucks or something? And it was like close to like four grand in CDs. And I was like, I'm never buying a CD.
Drew
All the CDs of the albums you like are going to be expensive. Because if you're like into like the culty like ass albums. CDs are so expensive. They go like 100 plus sometimes.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
Like for me, one of my favorite CDs ever is the Harold Bud and Robin Guthrie Mysterious Skin soundtrack. It's my Grail album. It's the best album on planet Earth. And I own three copies of the CDs because I'm actually neurotic and fucking crazy.
Inya
Have you seen Mysterious Skin?
Drew
No, because I heard it's really sad and I don't care to watch it.
Inya
No, dude, it will. It's one of those movies that you have to watch either at your lowest point already or when you're prepared to not be.
Drew
I do need to watch it. I get ragged on by all my friends because it's been like my top tier like in most rotation album for like almost three years.
Inya
It's like all you fucking listen to.
Drew
Yeah, it's like the. It literally I. I need to get a new CD player. Cuz I listen to that album every single day. And I remember one time Jester got on my ass and was like, how have you not seen this movie? And you just like listen to this. And I was like. Because it's two of the greatest composers of all time.
Inya
Like hello. Y. Holy. We should talk about the bald cap incident. Finger you. Just because it's like the next episode. The next episode. And I. We can shut the up after. Like can you shut.
Drew
See, it's moments like this maybe I. I do have an issue with like helping people sometimes. You know what it is is because I'm like, this is the way it should be done. And, like, I'm gonna give you instructions and do it this way, and it will happen. And then when it doesn't work, I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? Like, you didn't listen to me at all. Because that's what happened with the balls cap. That is one of those moments where I was like, like, helping you, but the way I would help, like, my kid if, like, they did something stupid. And I was like, oh, my God.
Inya
Yeah. Like, so the bald cap, we installed it in the bathroom like, five minutes before that, before the episode. And I used lash and you use lash glue on my hair. And it wasn't like a little dabble here or there. Like, we wanted it to look kind of real. So she caked on this lash glue.
Drew
It wasn't sticking with a little bit. Yeah, it's not.
Inya
I don't blame you because it eventually worked, but like, hella lash glue in my hair like an insane amount. And I like, went the whole day.
Drew
I know. That's also what did it help is I remember telling Drew, like, because it was my bath night, I was like, oh, are you going to take a shower? Because you're going to have to, like, work to get that off.
Inya
And I was like, no, it'll take me. It's like water soluble. I was like, it'll take me two minutes, girl. Was I fucking wrong. Like, I, like, I didn't want to, like, get take a full shower because I didn't want to waste all of India's water. So I like, just turned on, like, all cold water with, like, a little bit of hot water. And I just, like, put my head over the shower and I just started, like, washing it. And I was like, oh, no. Like, this is not coming out with just water. And I like, shadow free. And you're like, use oil. And I. There's like, this spirit gum that came with the bald cat that I used to glue it to my face to glue the beard to my face. And I. It had remover in there and I just put the remover on the spots because I was like, oh, that'll melt it. Because it's like an oil. And you were saying, use oil, and that shit didn't work. And then India came in there and was like, oh, here, use this. And gave me body oil. And like.
Drew
Because also when I was saying oil, I did. I don't think you heard me, but I was like, literally, use olive oil.
Inya
Oh, I didn't hear that.
Drew
That's why I was saying. And then I thought you had used Olive oil. And it wasn't working. And that's why I resorted to the. The body oil that I had, because I only have, like, nice hair oil. And I was like, I'm not gonna. Like, you have to, like, drench yourself in that. And I was like, I'm not using my nice hair oil.
Inya
Yeah, of course.
Drew
So Drew was like. Looked so sad.
Inya
Just like, dude, I was over. I was fully in a position where I was like, oh, like, I'm fully gonna have to shave my head. Which is like, I wanted to do that, but I was like, I kind of wish I had that choice. And I was like, this is so. I wish we took photos of it, but it was so matted, like, it was crazy. It a mangy ass dog that, like, hadn't been groomed in 10 years, and it was just running the streets of LA.
Drew
No, literally, it was so up. And then also, like, I was getting annoyed because, like, if you are a girl, you know that, like, one of the things you have to grow up learning is getting your fucking hair yanked out when you got your hair brushed. So, like, my. My scalp. I do not have, like, a sensitive scalp at all. I could fucking rake, like, a comb or a brush through my hair and not give a fuck. Like, I could pull out 8 million strands and, like, wouldn't feel a thing. Fully numb to it. So then Drew was needing help, so I just grabbed my wide tooth comb and I drenched his head in the oil.
Inya
And wait, a lot of.
Drew
Yeah, it was obviously fun squirting it on him.
Inya
It sounded really sick. Yeah, but she was running that brush through my hair, comb through my hair and, like, pulling the out of my hair. And he was like, oh, yeah. Ever since I was a kid, like, my mom would always be like, girl, shut the up. Like, why is your scalp so sensitive? When she would, like, like, comb my hair? And I was like, I just have always had, like, a sensitive scalp. And that pissed in you off a little bit. She didn't. You didn't vocalize it? You were just like, No, I was just like, okay.
Drew
Like, I was just, like, doing the thing. Like, you know, classic. You grab the hair and then you work at it so you're not tugging on the scalp. But, like, it was the most. Like, I was. I thought I was being gentle, and then it wasn't working, and I just tapped out because, like, he kept being like, ow. And I was like, okay.
Inya
I just said. I literally said out twice. I was like. I didn't even say ow the second time. I was just like, I didn't want.
Drew
You know what it is, is worse than an ouch. Because I'm like, say that I'm hurting.
Inya
You because, like, well, I wasn't even like, trying to say that you're hurting you because I know beauty is pain. Like Beyonce, you were not serving beauty, though. No, I.
Drew
That oil's hair for like eight days.
Inya
No, that's what I was about to say. The amount of oil that India put into my hair to get it out, literally, I washed my hair and I woke up the next day and I was like, like, oh my God. Like, my hair is still like, hella oily. Like, it. It. The oil just like repelled all the water and I just didn't. I had oil hair for like two days. And then I washed my hair again that night and I got out of the shower and I was like, oh, my God. Like, my hair still smells like oil. There's still oil in it and it was still a little shiny. And then I washed my hair last night and when I was drying my hair, I was like, oh, my God. I. It still smells like that body oil, so it's still coming out. But my hair is like a little curlier. It feels like this is with like, like just water and shampoo. Like, I didn't even conditioner it, but.
Drew
Is that because you ran out of conditioner?
Inya
I really need to get new one. But I'm also like, totally. I'm so over Leilabo conditioner. Like, I'll do the hair wash, like the shampoo, but I will not buy the conditioner.
Drew
I feel like their conditioner, of all the, like, high end, like, bougie conditioners from those fragrance brands, theirs is actually the most, like, viscous. And it's good for like, our hair type because the Aesop one, I really like it. But because it, like, feels the most natural and like, it doesn't feel like it's clogging my hair, but, like, it doesn't leave my hair feeling smooth. Like, I'm the type of. I don't give a fuck if there's like a layer of like microplastics on my hair as long as my shit looks good and feels good.
Inya
Like, that's what I was about to say. Like, I'm going back to just using regular shampoo, like, or conditioner. I mean, because, like, I like the way Fructis Garnier makes my hair feel. Yeah, it feels flowy. It's a little shiny. Like, I don't give a.
Drew
Also. And then. And no I will not be using a deep cleanse shampoo to get all that microplastic out. I'll just carry microplastics to my grave.
Inya
I'll just. I'll suck them out.
Drew
Literally. I'll use my teeth. I'll grate them out with my teeth.
Inya
You think there's microplastics inside of this hair?
Drew
Yeah, we. The thing is, what people don't want to talk about is we need our microplastics.
Inya
Yeah, we. Like, it's part of our diet now. Like, we. You need to be eating microplastics.
Drew
Like, it feels good when I feel. Fill my hole with them.
Inya
Yeah. Period.
Drew
Not a microplastic, but plastic. It just feels good.
Inya
Oh, this is the last thing we'll talk about, and then we can, like, just move on. But no one is talking about how I was in Stranger Things season four.
Kai
No, you weren't, dude.
Drew
So last episode, you're claiming to be friends with Finn, and this episode, you're claiming you were in the season. So. So you used Finn.
Inya
No, I didn't use Finn. Like, we became friends through the filming.
Kai
And he is friends with Finn. Last time we hung out, Finn introduced himself to you.
Inya
Yeah, that's just like, this game that we play. It's like, actors game. Like, he met me in character. Okay. I was on character. I was on character in set. On the set. And I didn't introduce myself as Drew because I really method act. I don't even want to get into it. But then when we. We introduced each other to each other because, like, that's what actors do.
Kai
Like, right after, he was like, drew's gonna say that this is a game that we play. I don. Know him. He's really weird.
Drew
Yeah, he. He.
Inya
I just can't win with you guys.
Drew
He's actually telling us that you have, like, a blog about him.
Kai
There's, like, weird fan fiction that you write about him.
Inya
I mean, that's just, like, this side thing. Like, it's funny, but it's like a joke between us. Like, us.
Kai
And then he said he's gonna say that it's a funny bit, but it's not. It's creepy. It waits me out.
Drew
He.
Inya
The knife. Did he tell you about the knife and the gun?
Drew
No, dude.
Kai
What?
Drew
Threatened him?
Inya
No. If he didn't say anything. No, I didn't.
Drew
I think that's because he's taking legal action, so he's probably not gonna bring it up to us.
Inya
Us? I. We're friends, and we filmed an entire season of a show together.
Drew
Is there someone on this. This season who, like, looks like you?
Inya
Me?
Drew
Shut the up. Okay, here's our media of the week.
Inya
Me. I look like me. Duh.
Drew
My media, audio wise, is nothing Can Stop Us by Sate Etienne I'm gonna say this because. No, never mind. A little Lost, Arthur Russell, Heat Wave, the Blue Nile, and Fidelity. That whole, like, the Dirty column album, which I think I've said before, but that's been back on loop.
Inya
Gorgeous.
Drew
And then movies. I don't think I've seen a movie this week. Maybe I did. Oh, my God, no. Chip and Dale, Rescue Rangers. Literally best movie ever. That movie was so, so good. It made me so happy.
Inya
Dude, I'm so happy we all waited to watch it together, too, because, like.
Drew
I would have been so bummed if I saw that alone.
Inya
Yeah. Because it was one of those movies that, like, who gives a talk in the middle of it? Talk with your friends. Like, have a little goofy moment.
Drew
Like, another thing about me is I will pause a movie and talk to my friends.
Inya
That was actually really funny. Really advanced for, like, a Disney kids show. And, like, the innuendos between, like, drug trafficking was, like, so funny. And, like, like, they did things in that movie that, like, that were, like, brand new. I don't know. Like, there were so many moments where I was like, I can't believe someone thought of that. And they executed was, like, phenomenal. That and also the Seth Rogen thing.
Drew
Yeah.
Inya
I was like, I cannot believe someone thought of that and wrote that in there. And they did that. Because that is so meta and so sick. But, yeah, Chimney movie is also my. Sorry for hijacking that. Yeah, that was lit boots. All right, I'm back on my grime. Venus Fly by Grinds. Oh, that reminds me of Rhyme when we Stand.
Drew
Grimes.
Inya
Yeah. Stan Grimes. Love, love Grimes. And then. This is crazy. This is a new turn of events for me. But is that a Luna? Yeah.
Drew
Oh, that song is so good.
Inya
Yeah, I. Hi High is my next media by Lun. And then I also have Girlfriend by Luna and Odd Eye Circle, because that's just a classic. Like. Yeah, you do. No, I'll play it for you and you'll know it. And then Closer by Tegan and Sarah. This song not enough.
Drew
That song.
Inya
No one's talking about it. No one is talking about how good this song is. Is still to this.
Drew
We're revamping. That moment is like a tough low moment. Yeah, you can't. You're gonna put that on and not have a good time.
Inya
No, it's like crazy. Just smile and have a fun time. But I said. I said, not enough people are talking. Why is no one talking about to. I mean, Tegan and Sarah Closer and kind of like, people are talking about.
Kai
I feel like people mentioned that song about how, like, prolific it is.
Drew
I haven't seen anybody mention it in a long.
Inya
Yeah, I think I'm the first person. And honestly, you know what's weird? They showed me that song before it released. Like. Yeah, in the studio.
Drew
They were literally like, a. Like, 12.
Inya
No, that. Exactly. It was like this make a wish thing that I won because I faked. Faked it. But no, they showed me that song and, like, I was in the studio, like, head bombing, and I. I was listening. I was like, damn. Like, this is usually.
Drew
It takes a lot. Like, Drew doesn't show that kind of, like.
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
Rapport in the studio.
Inya
Yeah. And I was like, oh. I was like, yeah, y' all have a hit on your hands. And they're like, what? No, this is just like a throwaway track. And I was like, no, you need to put that out. That is a hit. And they weren't gonna put it out until I told them to.
Drew
Thank you so much for that, actually.
Inya
Yeah.
Kai
No, he's lying.
Inya
First I'm lying about the Stranger Things, and now I'm lying about the closer thing.
Drew
My friend doesn't lie.
Inya
I don't lie about things.
Drew
He was on Stranger Things, and he made them take that, like, put that song out. Oh, A Little Bit Closer. Oh, that song is so.
Inya
It's gonna be blessed.
Drew
They have another hit that I'm trying.
Inya
I wanna do it a little bit closer.
Kai
Can I do Media?
Drew
What? Is it porn?
Kai
It's not porn.
Drew
What is it?
Kai
It's real. It's real Media How I Roll by Britney Spears. Have you guys heard that song?
Drew
I don't know.
Inya
I haven't heard that.
Kai
I had never heard it before. It's very advanced.
Inya
What is that? Oh, is that the Britney song?
Kai
How I Roll?
Inya
Yeah.
Drew
I don't like this.
Kai
It's really sick.
Drew
When is this from How I Roll by Britney Spears?
Inya
What era?
Drew
Yeah, you're never doing media again.
Kai
And then Crown on the Ground by Sleigh Bells Slay. Okay, well, that went terribly for me.
Drew
I don't like that. So I don't like either of those songs. So you're. You're. So you call my friend a liar? You share bad penis. I'm kidding.
Inya
That's my jaw.
Drew
Stop. All right.
Inya
Could you hear that, Kai?
Kai
Yeah, that was really loud.
Inya
Actually, this is going on this side. You hear? Kind of.
Kai
Not at all. I heard that.
Drew
Okay, the episode is over.
Inya
Yeah. Sit you over. Bye.
Drew
Is there really an Artist Called Sleep?
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Emergency Intercom – Episode: "Enya Passed Away" (June 3, 2022)
Hosted by Enya Umanzor and Drew Phillips, Emergency Intercom delivers a blend of humor and candid conversations. In this episode titled "Enya Passed Away," the hosts delve into a tumultuous night filled with heavy drinking, unexpected mishaps, and the deep bonds of friendship.
The episode kicks off with Drew hinting at significant developments, creating suspense among listeners.
However, Enya quickly downplays the "big news," revealing a playful dynamic between the hosts.
This exchange sets a comedic tone, suggesting that the "emergency" is more about capturing attention than any actual crisis.
The core of the episode revolves around Drew's intense night of partying, leading to severe intoxication and subsequent care from Enya.
Drew recounts an experience at the Renaissance Fair, highlighting his overconsumption of alcohol.
The humorous portrayal of a chocolate-covered banana sets the stage for the chaotic night ahead.
As the night progresses, Drew admits to becoming excessively drunk, leading to his inability to function normally.
Their lighthearted banter masks the seriousness of Drew's condition, which deteriorates rapidly.
The pivotal moment occurs when Drew severely overdrinks, resulting in him almost passing out.
Drew describes waking up after vomiting and choking on his own vomit, a harrowing experience that underscores the episode's title.
Enya takes charge, ensuring Drew's safety throughout the night, showcasing the depth of their friendship.
Her dedication is evident as she manages Drew's wellbeing amid extreme circumstances.
Throughout the episode, Enya and Drew intersperse their serious recounting with humorous tangents, maintaining an engaging and lighthearted atmosphere.
The hosts engage in a playful debate about the texture and preparation of pears and kale.
Their banter extends to discussions about avoiding washing certain fruits, adding relatable humor about everyday habits.
Later in the episode, the conversation shifts to their gaming experiences, reflecting on how their interests have evolved.
They humorously critique each other's gaming preferences, highlighting generational and personal differences.
The hosts share their favorite songs and movies, adding personal touches to the conversation.
Their discussions reveal their diverse tastes and the evolving landscape of media consumption.
Amidst the humor, there are moments of reflection, particularly regarding the toll of excessive drinking and the importance of friendship.
These insights add depth to the episode, reminding listeners of the balance between fun and responsibility.
The episode wraps up with the hosts sharing their experiences and looking forward to future endeavors, despite the challenges faced during the night.
Their camaraderie shines through, emphasizing resilience and the enduring nature of their friendship.
Notable Quotes:
Drew on Overindulgence: "I'm getting the viewers in. I'm getting them ready. You gotta lift them up and then drop them." (00:54)
Enya on Caring: "I was gonna create a sex yurt at Burning Man... We're working on the design." (06:33)
Drew's Realization: "I'm literally talking about kale." (02:44)
Enya on the Aftermath: "It was violent." (22:41)
Drew Reflecting on Sleep: "I sleep all day." (33:49)
Conclusion:
"Enya Passed Away" offers a raw and humorous exploration of a night gone awry, highlighting the dynamics of friendship, the perils of excessive drinking, and the ability to find humor amidst chaos. Enya and Drew's candid storytelling, punctuated with witty exchanges and memorable quotes, make this episode a compelling listen for both regular fans and newcomers alike.