Have such a dope soul that people crave your vibes

Summary

Emergency Intercom: "Have Such a Dope Soul That People Crave Your Vibes"
Release Date: June 9, 2023
Hosts: Enya Umanzor and Drew Phillips
Podcast by iHeartPodcasts

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Introduction and Hosting Banter
The episode kicks off with the hosts engaging in their signature playful banter. Drew humorously admits to "kicking the camera" in the previous episode (00:33), setting a lighthearted tone. Enya and Kai (likely a recurring character or co-host) tease each other about their antics, establishing a dynamic and comedic rapport early on.

Drew ([00:33]): "I did. I kicked the camera last episode."

The "Dope Soul" Quote and Its Impact
A significant portion of the discussion centers around the phrase "Have such a dope soul that people crave your vibes," which Enya credits to a conversation at Barbies. She emphasizes its profound effect on her worldview, suggesting it as a pivotal moment in her personal growth.

Enya ([02:24]): "We were at Barbies and Ben said it. And I was like, oh. I'm saying that on the podcast because that was one of the most important things ever said online."

Kai and Enya delve into the layers of meaning behind the quote, playfully dissecting its components and mocking each other's interpretations.

Kai ([02:55]): "Such an over stimulating, evil, diabolical, mean."

Personal Experiences with Social Interactions and Drinking
The conversation shifts to personal anecdotes about social interactions. Kai reflects on his challenging interactions at a party, admitting to being overly outspoken and unfiltered in his humor, which he fears might intimidate others.

Kai ([03:46]): "I went to that party and I was like interacting with people. And when I was interacting, I was like, oh, I think I might scare people a little bit..."

Enya shares her struggles with excessive sweating during a social visit, leading to humorous exchanges about body odor and personal hygiene.

Enya ([05:25]): "I went to their house, and I, like. For some reason, I was like, odor like a stinky boy..."

Beige Flags: Navigating Relationship Quirks
The hosts explore the concept of "beige flags"—quirky traits in relationships that are neither red (deal-breakers) nor green (positive attributes). Enya introduces her own list, revealing personal habits like sleeping with her phone on loud volume to stay connected in emergencies.

Enya ([08:26]): "I sleep with my phone at full volume because in the middle of the night, if I get a call, it means someone is dying and I need to answer it."

Kai shares his need for coffee as a "beige flag," humorously detailing how it affects his travel and daily routines.

Kai ([10:03]): "This is so stupid. I don't want to do this. I decided after I told you, write yours down..."

Koala Rant: A Comedic Diatribe
Enya launches into a passionate rant about koalas, theatrically condemning them as "evil, disgusting, nasty, vile creatures." She humorously exaggerates their traits, blending factual information with absurdity to entertain listeners.

Enya ([19:12]): "I don't know if y' all know anything about them, but they are monsters. They're evil, disgusting, like, nasty, vile creatures."

Kai joins in, comparing koalas' behavior to human-like absurd scenarios, further heightening the comedic effect.

Negative Riz and Social Charisma
The hosts discuss the modern slang term "riz" (short for charisma or charm), with Enya admitting her initial confusion before embracing it. Kai humorously claims to possess "negative riz," poking fun at his own social shortcomings.

Kai ([32:19]): "I don't actually have negative Riz. And also, like, we don't have to get into specifics."

Media, Pop Culture, and Personal Anecdotes
Enya and Kai touch upon various pop culture elements, including references to "Squid Game" and Shane Dawson. They share personal stories and opinions, blending genuine commentary with their characteristic humor.

Enya ([30:29]): "But yeah, mine is by ARCA and Safety Trance Cockiness by Rihanna. Still one of the best songs ever made."

Future Plans and Merchandise Tease
Towards the end of the episode, Enya announces their upcoming merchandise launch, hinting at new products for fans. Kai jokingly mentions being "high" in the next episode, while Enya reflects on serious topics with their usual comedic twist.

Enya ([51:47]): "I'm stopping vaping for good. It's for my mom's birthday. I love you mother."

Conclusion and Final Remarks
The episode wraps up with the hosts sharing final thoughts, continuing their blend of humor, personal insights, and interactive discussions. They encourage listeners to stay tuned for future episodes and upcoming merchandise.

Kai ([52:20]): "Thank you guys so much for watching. I hope you have a blessed day."

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Key Takeaways:

1. Dynamic Host Interaction: Enya and Kai (with occasional contributions from Drew) maintain a lively and comedic dialogue, keeping listeners engaged through playful teasing and relatable anecdotes.

2. Exploration of Personal Growth: The discussion around the "dope soul" quote highlights themes of self-improvement and the impact of meaningful conversations on personal perspectives.

3. Humorous Self-Deprecation: Both hosts frequently poke fun at their own habits and quirks, fostering a sense of authenticity and relatability.

4. Pop Culture Integration: References to contemporary media and personalities like "Squid Game" and Shane Dawson provide listeners with familiar touchpoints, enhancing the episode's relevance.

5. Engagement with Darker Topics: Despite the comedic tone, the hosts address deeper subjects such as personal trauma and societal observations, adding depth to their conversations.

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Notable Quotes:

• Enya ([02:24]): "That was one of the most important things ever said online... it really shifted the way I think about everything forever."

• Kai ([03:46]): "I just will like start talking and going in and I don't like, I have a hard time filtering my humor."

• Enya ([08:26]): "I sleep with my phone at full volume because... I need to answer if someone is dying."

• Kai ([19:35]): "When you die, I don't get to keep up with like gossip... it's annoying."

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Conclusion

This episode of Emergency Intercom masterfully blends humor with candid discussions about personal habits, social interactions, and pop culture. Enya and Kai's chemistry creates an engaging listening experience, peppered with memorable quotes and relatable content. Whether you're a long-time listener or new to the podcast, this episode offers a rich tapestry of laughs, insights, and authentic conversations.

Transcript

[Drew]

Okay, video room, audio room.

[Enya]

Ew.

[Kai]

Who mess up their job. Be like, guys, the camera's on this job.

[Enya]

Kai is going to start kicking the camera.

[Kai]

Halfway through, he's going to start shaking the goddamn ground we sit on.

[Drew]

I did. I kicked the camera last episode.

[Kai]

Oh, girl, we know. Shuffling and jigging around.

[Drew]

I was. I was all shoved into the corner.

[Kai]

Yeah. It's just like, oh, you're wearing the shirt. Yeah, that's awesome for.

[Drew]

Yeah, I'm wearing a shirt. And you got me.

[Kai]

Yeah. Not only got my.

[Enya]

Created with my bare hands.

[Kai]

Yes. I drew it.

[Enya]

Your reaction to it? I was like, why the. Did he. Didn't he react properly? Because she drew that before the party.

[Kai]

Yeah, I hand did that.

[Drew]

I thought it was like a Hollywood gifts thing.

[Enya]

No.

[Drew]

Okay, now this means even.

[Kai]

That's why. That's why I was like, oh, I'm getting into graphic design. Like, you bitches better, like, be sheltering yourselves.

[Drew]

I'm sorry. And I really love it. And I'm also sorry, but the last episode with my huge dick hitting the truck.

[Kai]

Welcome to this episode of. We haven't even said that.

[Enya]

His tiny penis was inside of him and his balls went up into his chest and it hurt so bad.

[Kai]

That's why he was moving around.

[Enya]

Huge.

[Drew]

My huge.

[Kai]

Okay, you can't say that, like, in the first, like, three minutes. Okay. Like, me acting like we. I think we've had a video, like, in the green for monetization for the past eight months.

[Enya]

Like, I don't even know what I'm like, they have come after us in a very real way on YouTube. They do. Not with us, but yeah. Welcome back to Emergency Intercom. We're back to the basics, Just India and I and Kai.

[Kai]

Today I want to talk about.

[Enya]

I got a bunch of notes.

[Kai]

Okay.

[Enya]

I just wanted to say that before I forgot.

[Kai]

Well, then you start.

[Enya]

Okay. Have such a dope soul that people crave your vibe. Where were we?

[Kai]

Where. Where were we that someone said that? And you literally go, I need to write that.

[Enya]

We were at Barbies and Ben said it. And I was like, oh. I'm saying that on the podcast because that was one of the most important things ever said online in p. Like, in general. Like, it. It really shifted the way I think about everything forever.

[Kai]

That is true. I do agree with that.

[Enya]

Have such a dope soul. Like, okay. It's like, it's giving. Like, there's layers to it. It's like, have such a dope soul. Like dope heroin. Like, have such a dope soul. Craving heroin. Like, there's levels to this minus be.

[Kai]

Such an over stimulating, evil, diabolical, mean.

[Enya]

Evil, sick and twisted person.

[Kai]

That's literally everybody who watch this podcast.

[Enya]

That's what they're like, yes, yes.

[Kai]

That's what I was saying. I think she's a bitch. Like, oh my God, you read my mind.

[Enya]

Guys. Inya is a sweetheart. It's all a character, but sometimes it's real, but like, it's mostly a character.

[Kai]

No, I am such an over stimulating soul that people fear my vibe.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

That's what I am.

[Enya]

Fear your energy.

[Kai]

I'm like. So I was.

[Enya]

What did you say yesterday you said something like, people are like a. Oh, it was you talking about how you have negative riz. You were like, I have negative riz that like. And people. Well, India does have negative riz. We'll get into that later. Maybe. Maybe we'll get into it. But you were saying something about people being like, afraid of your energy. But I don't remember what it was.

[Kai]

So I'm trying to remember. I think it was because I went to that party and I was like interacting with people. And when I was interacting, I was like, oh, I think I might scare people a little bit, but not because I'm like, again, I. I don't think I'm like, no one meets me and is like this aggressive, crazy person.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

I just will like start talking and going in and I don't like, I have a hard time filtering my humor. Like my sense of humor.

[Enya]

Yeah, it's the same across the board for everybody.

[Kai]

Yeah. I give like the same to everybody. So for people who are may more introverted, I think I can be a.

[Enya]

Lot shaking in like the craziest way.

[Kai]

Well, it's because my over stimulating vibe is shaking your soul.

[Enya]

It's also because like, most people see like pretty girl and think, oh, like she's going to be quiet. Which is the way it should be. Like, girl shouldn't speak. Yeah.

[Kai]

I will agree. Yeah.

[Enya]

And then they hear you speak and they're like, oh, whoa.

[Kai]

I think that was it. And also like, I. I just think I over talk in every situation. I over talk. I snitch on myself. I. I'm just too truthful.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

And just to me.

[Enya]

And like, when people see me, they just love me. They just have like a natural charisma that people are just like attracted to and they just want to be close to me and be a part of my world and my universe and I just don't let everybody in. And that's okay.

[Kai]

Like, yeah, when people see you, they're like, thank God I never got a nose hair trimmer, because my body is doing what it's supposed to do with these nose hairs, and it's blocking out the bacteria and stench coming from your body.

[Enya]

Okay, yeah, yeah.

[Kai]

That's kind of the vibe.

[Enya]

No, that's not the vibe. I don't sleep stink, so. So you gotcha.

[Kai]

You literally go, well, Tavian, Matt, are just gonna have to, like, deal with my stench. Or was it when we were going to their crib?

[Enya]

I went to their house, and I, like. For some reason, I was like, odor like a stinky boy, and I, like, showered. I couldn't. It was just. It was just my body over producing, like, sweat or some. I don't know what the hell was going on. And I wreaked, and I went to their house, and I was just, like, it. Like, their homies, like, they can smell me. I don't give a fudge.

[Kai]

I didn't smell you all night, though, so. We also were eating Big Mac tacos, so I don't know if it was.

[Enya]

Like, it's not that deep to smell people. But back to people seeing me in public, they're afraid for different reasons, because I give, like, the killer energy when.

[Kai]

Yeah, you do.

[Enya]

It's really. I'm like, a really.

[Kai]

Because you are silent when we're out. So, like, you're the silent killer.

[Enya]

Yeah, but no, like, get a drink of me, and I'm like, the life of the party.

[Kai]

You have not had a drink for, like, two years. Like.

[Enya]

Yeah, that's true. No, guys, I don't think you're really understand. I have been taking drinking, not drinking very seriously since this video came out.

[Drew]

I mean, we could drive him to the hospital.

[Kai]

No, I'm not going to the hospital.

[Drew]

We could just drive to the hospital. It wouldn't cost $4,000.

[Kai]

The thing is, Mason, last night was literally throwing up, like, four times in a row. We did take him to the hospital, so I'm like, why do we have to take Drew to the hospital? Look at him.

[Drew]

He's way worse than Mason. This is like Project X. Yeah, I know.

[Kai]

What if it's, like, at this. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Enya]

It's. It's really. That was really traumatic for me, and, like, I turned green. Like, you can't continue after that.

[Kai]

Yeah, I think there is a certain point. I mean, like, I feel like, also, with age, everyone in our group is just like, dude, I had two drinks, and then I felt like shit. But, yeah, do you want to get into our beige flags? Because we kind of went. We almost went over our red flags last episode, but, like, we didn't really have any prepared. So, like, I couldn't think off top of my head when you asked me for beige flags. The things I was thinking of, I was like, oh, no, this is fully a red flag. It's, like, not a. I know.

[Enya]

I just wrote them down anyways, because I was like, what the does even beige flag mean? It's like. I know. It's like a mix between red and green, which you get beige when you mix those two colors together. I bet you didn't know that. Color theory. Hello. I studied it in college. I went to RISD in brown. It was a really tough schedule when I was in college.

[Kai]

Deep.

[Enya]

Yeah. Rsid. It's like this really, like. It's like this art program at Brown University. It's really hard, actually. It's really difficult, actually, because, like, brown.

[Kai]

Doesn'T get to the damn point. Like.

[Enya]

I don't even know what the. I was just. Damn. Leave the alone. Hello? Like, I'm alive and well.

[Kai]

I'm not kidding. Like, I looked at my phone to look at my list, and then I heard you were still talking about, like, color theory, and I couldn't believe it.

[Enya]

Okay, so my beige flags are. This is so stupid. I don't want to do this. I decided after I told you, write yours down, because I want to do them. Because it's all things everybody already knows about me, except for this one. I sleep with my phone at full volume because in the middle of the night, if I get a call, it means someone is dying and I need to answer it.

[Kai]

Oh.

[Enya]

So all night long, my notifications are going off because I'm very popular.

[Kai]

I will say, you do get. You use that damn phone like, you people use that phone.

[Enya]

People communicate with me.

[Kai]

No, you communicate with people. Drew is, like, in 18 group chats. Like, talking to people. Like, keeping up with people. I'm not kidding. Like, it would be hella popular. It is a shocker when I have a notification when I wake up, and I'm not even saying that because I'm like, I'm so alone. Whatever. It's genuinely just, like, I actually don't like texting people and talking to people over the phone, and it bothers me. And I put everybody on, like, mute who texts me. What the is that? I don't like using my phone.

[Enya]

It's. It's a really big attention point between India and I because, like, I'LL like, text her when she's away, and then it will literally be, like, 36 texts before she gets back to me. And it's really sad, actually. Sometimes I'm like, damn.

[Kai]

It's just like, I. Like, if I'm opening my phone, there's, like, so many other things to stimulate myself with. I don't want to talk. Like, this is my enrichment time. This is, like, my. No, like, no real people on this thing.

[Enya]

No, it was so lit. We came back from something and I was like, oh, like, thank God I get to come home and be on my phone and be on my, like, tummy time. Literally.

[Kai]

We went to, like, this spot where you can't use your phone, and we were there for four hours. And then when we got home, it was literally so fun.

[Enya]

Yeah, we went to this restaurant where they lock your phone up, like, because.

[Kai]

Yeah, we can't talk about it. We, like, literally can't talk about it.

[Enya]

It was really crazy. We saw a bunch of famous people twerking. It was really demonic and jerking off. Okay, what's your bass flag? I did one. You do one?

[Kai]

Mine is. This is so annoying, but I unironically need my coffee. And that's a beige flag because for, like, some people, who cares? But then when you get to traveling with me and staying with me for long periods of time, now I'm better at it. Like, now I've moved my life around where, like, I travel with, like, a little coffee maker thing, if I know.

[Enya]

Which psychotic and not normal, but I.

[Kai]

Took care of it. So it's not a flag anymore.

[Enya]

But it used to be like. Like, if we were traveling and you would have to take us to a coffee shop before we started our day at all, and we would spend an hour and a half finding coffee for Enya and. Wait, that's a documentary. Finding Coffee. Wait, no. What is it? Finding Something. I don't know, but finding Alaska maybe that's what I'm thinking of.

[Kai]

Yeah, the John Green coffee.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

Yeah. Like, finding coffee would not be good.

[Enya]

Okay, well. Oh, it's Looking for Alaska, and I'm gonna kill myself.

[Kai]

Okay, I'll be waiting. Wow, he ate with this cover.

[Enya]

No, he literally did.

[Drew]

But someone gets a blow job in that. In that book.

[Kai]

Is that real? Yeah, I don't remember that.

[Drew]

I. I'm pretty sure it's real because I remember reading in, like, seventh grade, and I was like. Because I was assigned it, and I. And all of a sudden, somebody's, like, getting their dick sucked, and I was.

[Kai]

Like, I got to look into that.

[Enya]

Okay. Murakami. I open Red Bulls and use them as air fresheners. That was another one. It's just all shit that I already said before. I say that's a beige flag because I like to have my space smelling good. But that's weird behavior.

[Kai]

What was it? Repeat again.

[Enya]

Red Bull air freshener.

[Kai]

Yeah, that is really fudgeing weird.

[Enya]

And that's probably just a red flag.

[Kai]

Yeah, that's fully a red flag. You're like trying to fudgeing. Start mold growth in your partner' something. Like, that's a red flag.

[Enya]

That's not what I'm trying to do.

[Kai]

Cool. Well, mine, my other one is that I'm a germaphobe, which also, like, doesn't seem like it would be a problem. But I do find it a problem in my relationships because it always gets to the, like, point where I don't like morning breath and I don't want to kiss somebody before they brush their teeth. Like, I just find it really disgusting. And I'm like, why would I do that? And that's always a big thing. It's like, oh, my God. Like, I don't say anything about your morning breath. And I'm like, okay. Like, you can if you want. Like, it's fucking gross. Like, I don't want to kiss you if you don't brush your teeth. It's nasty. Like, you slept with your mouth open all night. I have a cat. You had feces air in your mouth. Like, don't. No, I'm not doing that.

[Enya]

But you have feces air in your mouth.

[Kai]

Yeah, but I'm not going over to kiss whoever I'm like fucking on. Like, I don't do that. I'm like, I'm gonna brush my teeth and then, and then I'll do that. But yeah, it's, it's things like that. It doesn't know any partner I ever have. Like, my little, my little things that I'm like, I'm like, pretty. I'm like, no, you're dirty to me. Like, I find you very dirty. You need to shower. Which is really annoying. I'm sure it's so annoying to hear from a partner, like being told as like a grown ass adult, like, are you gonna shower? Yeah, like, that is really annoying.

[Enya]

It is pretty probably.

[Kai]

Which, like, that's why it's a beige flag that turned into a red flag because you just don't think anything of it at first because you're like, oh, my God, this girl's so awesome. And then you're like, oh my God, this girl's actually insane. And it's keeping track of when I clean myself.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

All right, all right. Why is scarlet fever still a thing?

[Enya]

What is that? Is that scarlet fever like the, like rats that the girl wore on her chest? No, she was a slide, a total slag.

[Kai]

Oh, my God. No. Okay. I don't know what scarlet fever is by definition, but it literally sounds like something that only is supposed to happen in a Sofia Coppola movie.

[Enya]

Is it just like toxic blood syndrome? Like septic blood?

[Kai]

It's a really small powder. People get it. Scarlet fever is the most common in children 5 to 15 years old. A bacterial illness that develops in some people who have strep throat, red rash on face, neck, trunk. The is a trunk, arms and legs. So you just like get covered in a rash and it's usually from having a sore throat. You end up getting scarlet fever. But they need to change the name of that because literally, why do we still have something that's scarlet fever?

[Enya]

Dude, scarlet fever is so cocket. Like.

[Kai]

Like cocket. That's not how you pronounced.

[Enya]

It's cocket, like the fashion Catholicism. Cocket. C, O, C, K, E, T, T, E. No, no.

[Drew]

Yeah, that's not how it's spelled.

[Enya]

Okay, then spell it.

[Kai]

You're just projecting the kind of things you enjoy onto like a word that I enjoy.

[Enya]

Hello. Look at me. Hello.

[Kai]

Yeah. Also, we need to put Shane Dawson in court.

[Enya]

Oh, yeah. He ruined an entire generation with those goddamn conspiracy videos. He was the genesis of people thinking believing in conspiracy theories were okay.

[Kai]

Like Shane Dawson really freaks me out. Got so high and we were watching his video, like his conspiracy video. And I don't know, like something about him. Like he doesn't. He is my conspiracy. My conspiracy theory is that he is not real. That's my conspiracy that he's not a real person. And like, also, why is he in that same ass shirt? Like I need to know about the shirt. My conspiracy theory is like that he.

[Enya]

Rebound the shirt like and then ripped it.

[Kai]

Yeah, I know. Like, no, that's my thing is like did he repurchase that shirt or did he save that shirt from those videos?

[Enya]

He definitely saved it 100%. And he was like, this is memorabilia. Like I was creating the best.

[Kai]

Oh my God. He probably felt like a God when he took it out of the vault. He was like taking it out of like a. Like a stinky moth smelling bin of clothing and is like, I wish he filmed that because you know, he would have edited it Crazy.

[Enya]

Probably did. The craziest thing about Shane Dawson is like when he was releasing those like long form video series in the beginning, like it was a. It was an event. Like it was like, oh my God, we're about to sit down and watch this for an hour and then we're gonna get another one and the next day and like blah, blah, blah, blah. It was huge. Like you would sit down with your homies and watch it. And now looking back on all those videos we were so excited to watch, like they're really bizarre. Like, it's really, really interesting.

[Kai]

The thing is, like, I think we were watching it and still kind of poking fun at it. Like the whole him going into that damn Chuck E. Cheese for that pizza will never not be the funniest thing on the planet. But it was like a moment and it was so crazy like how big of a moment it was. Because when you look at the views on those videos there they were like Mr. B size.

[Enya]

Yeah, they're mass massive.

[Kai]

But now it's just like, okay, like I guess also after everything happened, it was just like, oh, right, right. And now we have Mr. Beast, which I. Is Mr. Beast in his flop era? Like kind of.

[Enya]

He's a little bit. He's only getting like a hundred million views instead of 300 million, which is literally so pathetic. YouTube in general is in their flop era right now. It's really crazy. We're the only thing keeping YouTube alive.

[Kai]

Wait, Mr. Beast did ages one to 100 fight for $500,000. So we literally have to watch this.

[Enya]

When did this come out?

[Kai]

Nine days ago.

[Enya]

Oh, what the. Why did it.

[Kai]

105 million. So yeah, we. Yeah. Views.

[Enya]

Oh my God.

[Kai]

I cannot believe that.

[Enya]

That's really crazy. That's like the most watched thing ever, period.

[Kai]

Like, yeah, like what? Wait, what is. Let's see what his most popular video is also. I hate that. Oh. Oh my God.

[Enya]

What is it? What is it? What is it?

[Kai]

The squid game video has half a billion views.

[Enya]

That's Squid Game, dude. I was just about to say that. Just like.

[Kai]

Help. Where are you?

[Enya]

Help. I'm in the squid game.

[Kai]

I think I'm in the squid game.

[Enya]

I'm trapped in the squid game.

[Kai]

Dude, that is literally so funny. Josiah mentioned squid game to me though. He was like, what if I came home? Like, do you know how crazy it would be if I came home? 1 like, like to Yalls house one day, him saying home if I came home. And like I look at your nightstand and I just saw the Card.

[Enya]

Wow.

[Kai]

And I was like, okay, like, leave for like, three weeks at a time.

[Enya]

You go perform in Squid Game.

[Kai]

Yeah, I would win.

[Enya]

You're. You're really bad with money. You have to, like, get your debt back.

[Kai]

Okay, wow. Now you're just, like, being like, like, calling me out. Well, I think I would win Squid Game.

[Enya]

No, you wouldn't.

[Kai]

Yes, I would. I would. As Lana has said, my way up to the top, everybody.

[Enya]

Oh, wait. That is a good method, I guess.

[Kai]

Wait, there was a character who tried to do that and it literally didn't work out. Everybody was like, ew, you're a. You remember that? Yeah, she's trying to, like, on, like the.

[Enya]

I mean, just.

[Kai]

Spoiler alert, guys. I know the show just came out.

[Enya]

Let's. In general, man. You know what I mean? Like, it's freaking crazy. Well, I have a note about koalas and I'm about to go on, like, a very, very long and real tangent. My God. About koalas. Like, I don't know if y' all know anything about them, but they are monsters. They're evil, disgusting, like, nasty, vile creatures.

[Kai]

Like, you're like, they're literally like a bear.

[Enya]

Like, they're really cute when you look at them, but the second they open their mouths, like, oh, my God, they're scary as just like, look up a picture of a koala. Like a. Look up scary.

[Kai]

Ever seen a koala with its mouth open?

[Enya]

Yeah, for good reason. Because the photographers are like, oh, we can't post this. This is ruining the illusion. Yeah, really bizarre and horrib. Horrifying.

[Kai]

This one's a really scary.

[Enya]

Yeah, that's it. That's the one that I saw and I was like, oh, wow. Like, oh, but he might. He might be like, melted by fires though, that first one.

[Kai]

No, he's just wet.

[Enya]

Oh, okay. Just making sure.

[Kai]

Making sure we're not about to share a picture of like, a burnt animal.

[Enya]

Yeah, the. Ew.

[Kai]

The mouth open is crazy. That's what people say about me, though.

[Enya]

Yeah, for real. But when I. But in a good way, I'm like, damn. When she opens her mouth, it's crazy. Disgusting. Nasty. Af. Okay, so first, they are smooth brained, which, like, normally brains are like, of intelligent creatures and mammals and animals in general. Like, their brains are creased and wavy to create, like, more surface area for like, I think it's neurons to form or some like that. Just like, more surface area to make your brain, like, better.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Enya]

And that's red flag number one. Red flag number two is Wait, red.

[Kai]

Flag is that they have smooth brains.

[Enya]

Yes.

[Kai]

Because I lowkey might have a brain that's like over time smoothing out.

[Enya]

No, no, you're good.

[Kai]

No, I think so.

[Enya]

But they're so stupid and smooth brain that if you put them in a room full of the only. Which is another thing I'll touch on the only thing they can eat, which is eucalyptus, which is so stupid and toxic and dumb. Like, why the they. But if you put them in a room, I'm like actually getting angry. They're so stupid. But if you put them in a room full of eucalyptus picked off the branch, just like viable food for them, they will not eat it because they're smooth, dumb brains will not recognize that that's edible to them and they will starve to death in a room full of food. 2. The only thing they can eat. That's me.

[Kai]

If someone put me in a room full of meatloaf.

[Enya]

Yeah. For real, you die.

[Kai]

Because I would just let myself die out and eat meatloaf.

[Enya]

But the next thing is their teeth. Like, you know, like rodent. Like eucalyptus is like very toxic. Like they're not supposed to be eating it. So they have like ironclad stomachs that like barely digest it. And when they're babies, this is the craziest thing you'll ever hear. When they're babies. The baby.

[Kai]

Do you know all this? Why do you know all this?

[Enya]

I learned things.

[Kai]

This is what you use your iPhone for? It's like insane.

[Enya]

I learned. But babies, they get milk, but the milk is only from eucalyptus juice, basically, like, so it's really not very nutritious at all. But when they're weaning off of milk to eucalyptus because it's the only thing they can eat, the moms, or since the babies can't digest it because it's really fibrous and toxic, the only way they can get nutrition is from literally sucking diarrhea juice out of their mother's ass. And it's enough nutrition for them just to get by joking. It's the craziest thing ever. And yeah, I could go. I could go way longer, but I've already talked about it for like four minutes and I'm done. But like, they're awful, awful creatures and they all have syphilis.

[Kai]

No. Like, how did you like, was there like a tick tock series of someone talking about them or did you. Okay, because I was like, did you like seek this information out after the fact?

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

So instead of learning the one fact.

[Enya]

You'Re like, I need More I need to know everything.

[Kai]

Well, yeah, I think they're like kind of gross. But also every singer on the planet who's gone to Australia takes a picture with a koala. So like.

[Enya]

Yeah. And they all get syphilis.

[Kai]

I need to start my singing career so that like, for some reason there's just a picture of me with a koala. Like, is there actually a picture of every famous person with a koala?

[Enya]

Because that's like what I think I'd imagine. So if you go, I'd imagine when.

[Kai]

You get off like the airplane, they're just there and they're like, all right, time for your picture. Like, get ready.

[Enya]

You get syphilis immediately from them.

[Kai]

Well, I've decided that the most annoying part about living isn't dying. Like, dying isn't the annoying part. It's that when I die, I don't get to keep up with like gossip. Like, things will keep going, jokes will keep going without me and evolving and like. Yeah, and evolving. And also it genuinely is annoying me because I was just thinking about my funeral the other night and I was like, damn, it is actually annoying. I won't be there. Like, it is the one party about me I won't be at.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

Because let's get real, like, funerals are parties. That's what I.

[Enya]

That's what they're celebrations of life. Hello.

[Kai]

Yeah, they're literally parties.

[Enya]

We went or. Sorry, what the. We need to. When I die, world tour in my body across, stuff me full of sand and wood chips and travel me around the world. I always said that that's like my one dying wish is I need a world tour of.

[Kai]

But the thing is like, you know, like I'm just going to be honest with you, that's not going to happen cuz that it's going to take a lot of money and work and I.

[Enya]

Don'T want to do use my bank account.

[Kai]

Oh, true, true. Yeah. Okay.

[Enya]

That's what I don't want. My money going to anybody but my world tour funeral funds.

[Kai]

Well, what if you have kids?

[Enya]

I want to be like Princess whatever or not Princess. What's her name? The Queen of England. Like, and everybody.

[Kai]

Well, no one's gonna be on the streets, babe.

[Enya]

Oh, will be losing their minds.

[Kai]

I don't know that necessarily in tropes of people will people be like running out into the street, like falling to their knees, being like, true Phillips.

[Enya]

Clip this, clip this. When I die, watch the masses will the. The Judaism girlies will pop out because the truth has spread in Like, a very real and diabolic way. Like, it's. It's really, like, actually kind of getting dangerous and out of hand at this point.

[Kai]

You know what else is annoying? I know when I die, some is gonna be like, good, I hate her. That's so annoying. And you know what's annoying is, like, I would do. I would probably make the same joke. So, like, I can't even be mad. Like, I literally can't be mad.

[Enya]

But it's not a joke for them. It's a real thing. There's real hatred there because they're losers. No, literally, losers. No life. No. No money, no swag. The swag that they got is all on their bed in a pile of dirty clothes because they're depressed.

[Kai]

Oh, no. But it is, like, coming from a real place because, like, our iPhones have just turned people into imagery. So then it's, like, easy for them to be like, this girl, like, good, she's dead. But yeah, I just know that when I died, like. Like, it's not gonna be, like, there will not be a parade inside my city. Like, it's not gonna be that vibe. Like, when I die, it's not gonna be, like, as dramatic as I want it to be. And the ripples aren't gonna go that far.

[Enya]

It's just gonna be like, damn, life truly is suffering.

[Kai]

Oh, my God.

[Enya]

Wait, did you just. Life is suffering?

[Kai]

Well, I mean, like, that's like, a really harsh take on it, though. So I, like. Because I know I haven't heard anyone say that, so I'm just like.

[Drew]

Like, I said that.

[Enya]

Yeah. Hello. Yeah, right here.

[Drew]

No, the Buddha said that.

[Kai]

Right? Right. Oh, also, if anybody wants to donate me some of their discharge, because I just got a really nice dab rib.

[Enya]

She'S been doing this charge.

[Kai]

So I'm just gonna start doing, like, discharge dabs. But mine aren't, like, viscous enough right now. I think I gotta. With my ph a little bit, and then my discharge.

[Enya]

Put any, like, Cheeto up there. Don't eat it.

[Kai]

Yeah, just let it, like, kind of.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

Do you think a hot Cheeto over time would just disintegrate in a hole like that? Like.

[Enya]

Yeah, it's acidic in there. It's not. Yeah, it's not alkaline at all.

[Kai]

Ew. Like, imagine pulling it out and it's just kind of like a stringy, like, left corn chip.

[Enya]

Kai walked into the house today and was like, oh, it stinks like weed in here. I was just about to say it's because of all the Discharge Dabs. And this has been doing.

[Kai]

Yeah, I, like, can't stop.

[Enya]

And then sometimes when it's not weed, it's literally just.

[Kai]

No, it's just discharge. Yeah, it's, like, weird. It's weird that it gives off the same scent as weed, which, like, I wouldn't have ever expected, but I'm no chemist, so I can't really explain it. It just does smell like.

[Enya]

We never ever talked about the girl who got into a car crash listening to emergency intercom. Yeah, this girl was listening to emergency intercom and we probably screamed in the mic or some and she swerved and got into a big ass car crash. She's alive and fine. She's a couple bruises, but her cars.

[Kai]

Oh, wait, no. Oh, wait, wait, wait. I thought you were talking about the girl who a deer ran into her car. Because that. This isn't the first time somebody got into a car accident.

[Enya]

There really is, like an emergency forming. Like every six months, someone gets in a car crash listening to us.

[Kai]

So you just don't listen to us in the car. I think, honestly, also when people like, here's my new thing. So I know a lot of people, over time, they just, like, start to get bored of podcasts and they maybe just start to get bored of us. And I understand it and I don't take it offense, but think about me and stop being selfish. You're being a prick.

[Enya]

Just put it on in the background.

[Kai]

Yeah, Put me on double speed and go to sleep with your iPhone charging next to your head.

[Enya]

Yeah.

[Kai]

And let it, like, do the thing that pregnant ladies do with their babies where they just, like, play Mozart around the baby. Do that with emergency intercom. But to yourself.

[Enya]

Yeah, you don't even have to listen.

[Kai]

You don't even have to, like, think about me and, like, what I have going on in my life.

[Enya]

Everything I given to you. It's crazy. Wait, I'm really trying to find this to me now. And then on top of that, a girl made emergency intercom themed nails. Oh, the nails are really so swag.

[Kai]

I need to get my nails done so bad. They're disgusting.

[Enya]

I have, like, screenshots of them somewhere.

[Kai]

Of the nails or the car?

[Enya]

Of the car and the nails. So I have, like, her profile that we can look up. I bet if you look up emergency.

[Kai]

Okay. It's songs now banned from my car and why. And it was emergency intercom and she said rear ended someone while putting volume on blast. Oh, it was a cute car too. She got a gorgeous little bruise on her eye.

[Enya]

From it, though.

[Kai]

Like, I'm assuming she hit the steering wheel, which really sucks. But it's like, gorgeous hues.

[Enya]

Gorgeous hues. Gorgeous, gorgeous, pretty color. Okay, I have this game that I want to play. It's reading Grinder messages, and I'm the blue line and you're the yellow line.

[Kai]

Want to top Is your profile image your mug shot?

[Enya]

Yes, it is. I was acquitted. Acquitted of resist, delay, obstruct. It's a matter of public record.

[Kai]

Out of courtesy. Why use that as your profile image?

[Enya]

Good lighting and clear skin.

[Kai]

That's the killer. Because all of those answers were like, chat gbt.

[Enya]

Yep.

[Kai]

Okay, next one. Hey, good Friday morning. Okay. I'm the killer in this one.

[Enya]

Jesus, that's a lot. Question mark, tops. Don't use exclamation points. Probably not even. You're probably not even a top. Don't use exclamation point again. Bottoms only want brooding guys. Not happy or excited. Learn how this works.

[Kai]

Did you smoke meth in my bathroom? Question mark.

[Enya]

No, I don't smoke meth. I smoked crack in your bathroom.

[Kai]

That's not better.

[Enya]

Oh, yeah.

[Kai]

Oh, than an ugly ass koala.

[Enya]

Oh, and then I saved a picture. You know the whole trend right now where it's like, you leaked, blah, blah, blah, like, and it's like the math test or something. And then I leaked. It's like a slideshow. First slides you leaked. Second slide is the math test. Third slide is I leaked. Fourth slide is, like, how to make cocaine. Or, like, how they stole a bunch of.

[Kai]

Your timeline is insane. Like, I don't know what you're talking about.

[Enya]

Well, I have an ingredients and recipe for how to make cocaine.

[Kai]

Can you make that? I guess. Like, someone's got to be making it. It doesn't just, like, pop up.

[Enya]

Exactly.

[Kai]

Wow.

[Enya]

I mean, honestly, gasoline and cocoa. Really?

[Kai]

What happened?

[Enya]

Coca leaves.

[Drew]

It's weird that you have to use gas.

[Kai]

Gasoline?

[Drew]

Yeah, they, like, concentrate it through gas or something.

[Enya]

Calcium oxide, baking soda, hydrochloric acid. And I'm not going to say anything else.

[Kai]

Yeah, I'm like, don't give off. Like, this video is disgusting. Also, the Marina song playing.

[Enya]

That'S actually really impressive. It's actually so we have to throw.

[Kai]

That on the screen. But the Marina song playing in the background is literally so funny.

[Enya]

Yeah, it's iconic AF as. Like, I think we should talk about you having negative Riz.

[Kai]

Well, okay. I don't actually have negative Riz. And also, like, we don't have to get into specifics.

[Enya]

We really don't have to get into specifics, but actually, there's not much to say. It's just negative Riz. And I have a lot of Riz.

[Kai]

Okay? Our Riz is probably the exact same, except I talk and you don't.

[Enya]

Yeah, I just don't need to use my Riz.

[Kai]

I talk too much. And you, like, barely talk.

[Enya]

I remember when people, like, when the youngins were talking about Riz for the first time time, I was like, what the is Riz? Like, it took me so long to fully understand what Riz was, and I was like, this is not something that's gonna catch on. I was like, riz, jizz. It's too, like, too close. It's not, but it's, like, fully a thing. And it reminds me of when I was first learning what a hashtag was when I was, like, seven, and, like, my sister and Meline were explaining to me what a hashtag was for, like, literally hours. And I really, like, genuinely could not comprehend this up. Like, could not comprehend what it was at all. And the only reason I learned what it was was, like, years later when my brain was, like, a little more developed. Like, I figured, like, finally put the pieces together. But, like, same thing. When I was first learning about Riz, I was like, what the is this? And I don't understand, like, negative Riz, bro has no Riz. Like, that gives no context because you just kind of have to, like, figure it out over time.

[Kai]

I just understood those kind of things immediately because I'm really good at understanding and listening and, like, get in the.

[Enya]

Kitchen and make me a sandwich.

[Kai]

We are in the kitchen. Oh, that actually brings me to my next topic. So, as women, we need to stop learning because all the blood is rushing to our brains and leaving our ovaries. And we have to remember that at the end of it, you need to have a baby. So stop learning. Stop ingesting knowledge, because you're using all that blood for your brain. But you might pass away and die because none of the blood is pumping to your ovaries.

[Enya]

Same for men, kind of. Because you get boners. All the blood people, yeah, people with too big of wieners, like, too long of boners, sometimes pass out because the blood that needed to give you an erection is so much that they literally faint and they can't get erection.

[Kai]

I unironically think that, like, big wiener culture is so fucking disgusting. And I genuinely find, like, big wieners disgusting. Like, you are a grotesque animal. You need to be put down. You are a danger to society. No, that is uncomfortable and unnecessary. Actually, I genuinely feel bad for your sex partners. Like, no, unnecessary. Cut it, cut it. Which is actually fucked up as I'm saying that. I'm realizing that those people do exist and they are probably watching this. But like, that's just how I feel. Like it's nasty. Like we watched that cut video where they were like talking about how big like everyone's wiener was. It was like guess the size of like everybody's like, wiener and that dude had like a humongous dong and it was just disgusting.

[Enya]

Like, did you say they should be like, put to death?

[Kai]

Yeah. I'm watching you like, take my joke and like destroy it. Literally. You know what's annoying, Kai, is this is my joke.

[Enya]

Yeah. So I guess I should be put to death. I just.

[Kai]

So I didn't say put to death. I said cut it.

[Enya]

Like, you did say put to death before.

[Kai]

Oh, I did, yeah.

[Enya]

And then you said cut it. Cuz I was waiting for you to say it again because I was like, oh, it's going to be even better if I don't have to ask it. But yeah, yeah, that's the vibe. I have a giant wang.

[Kai]

I think I have to go to Abbey Road soon.

[Enya]

Oh, really?

[Kai]

Yeah, I got, I got a casting. I know I. Or yeah, I'm going to the Abbey Road to get on the yellow submarine.

[Enya]

Oh wow. Enya was listening to the beat. Or India was listening to Paul George yesterday. And what I thought that motherfucker's name, George Harrison.

[Kai]

You just said two first names.

[Enya]

That's a basketball player. Paul George. And it was.

[Kai]

Okay, who the is naming their kid Paul George?

[Enya]

A lit ass person.

[Kai]

Because after the year 1995.

[Enya]

No, for real. If your name is Paul Listening. I'm sorry, it's not, not like I, I guarantee if you were born with the name Paul, you do not go by Paul until you're 48 years old. What, what's this? What is Paul short for? Like, what do you. I mean, what do you say?

[Kai]

Philanthropy.

[Drew]

Philanthropy.

[Enya]

Yeah. Paul. I don't know what the was I saying? Oh, and he was listening to George Harrison. And why am I saying this? Half the time I speak, I'm literally just like, what the am I saying? Like, I'm literally trying to fill the void. Like there's nothing for me to say anymore.

[Kai]

Yeah, I always just say too much and then when the answers don't come directly back, I'm like shocked. And then I'm remembering that I said 18 things to one person and their brain probably works the way a normal brain works, where you can't start three separate conversations with a single person and have them answer everyone. Do you know what I'm talking about? That's also why I don't like texting, is because, like, I talk too much for texting. So I. I'm one of those people who sends, like, 18 texts, all being different thoughts, and then I'm embarrassed and offended when the person doesn't reply to every single thought. And I'm like, wow, I guess the things I say, nothing of value.

[Enya]

I do that where I text, like a wall of tech, which is such a bad habit because everything I say in those 18 texts could just be condensed down into one text. But I, like, am so excited to get these thoughts across that I, like, send them separately. And I'm guarantee that's a relatable experience for someone out there, but it's a really bad habit. I've been sending audio messages on Instagram and via text. It's so easy to send audio messages.

[Kai]

Yeah. But then, like, do you ever feel like you just send too long of one? Because all the time I end an audio message and I'm looking down and it's 45 seconds, and I. I said what I needed to say in the first five seconds, but then just kept holding my finger down because I like hearing my own voice.

[Enya]

Yep.

[Kai]

So then I just talk and what's up is I won't even listen back to an audio message before I send it because I'm like, oh, that's too much to listen to. And that's me sending it. So I know when people receive it, they're like, bitch, fuck you. I don't want to hear your audio message. Also, someone was fighting on the street outside of our window last night, or outside of my window, and I literally.

[Enya]

Freaked out because we finally, we. I tell this story all the time about the home invasion. And, like, I. I don't know if we ever really told the story about, like, the kids screaming on the street and then those sus people. But, like, we retold all those stories recently, and of course that happened the.

[Kai]

That we say that like we're talking about it.

[Enya]

I don't. I don't know if I.

[Kai]

You hear no evil, speak no evil, you will see no evil.

[Enya]

Yeah. I don't think people really understand how traumatized I was from all of those events. Like, I literally could not sleep alone in the house or in my bedroom, period. Like, if Enya was home, I would have to go sleep in her bed and it was like that for literally months. Like, it was so scary. And any sound.

[Kai]

It was so nice, though, because I got to know your body in a way that I maybe wouldn't have ever. So in a way, thankful for the intruder for letting me touch you.

[Enya]

The body exploring part was a plus.

[Kai]

What?

[Drew]

That's gross.

[Enya]

Me when I'm talking, you're mad because.

[Kai]

Y' all have never spent the whole night together because you get used and abused and tossed out the front door. But I get the whole night. I get 12 hours.

[Drew]

He lets me chill for, like.

[Kai]

For, like, 30 minutes to clean. He. He's like, hey, pick up all your. And, like, you. You don't even let him shower, do you? Yeah, he's like, go home and shower.

[Drew]

Max has, like, three. However long a SZA song is, is how long I get after, and then he kicks me out.

[Enya]

Yeah. Use that as a timer.

[Kai]

He plays the weekend, and then you have to get out before it's over or the attack.

[Enya]

The weekend is a scary, scary vibe. A really, really scary man.

[Kai]

I thought you meant the song. I was like, I guess it is scary being, like, a side piece.

[Enya]

Oh, I literally just put those two pieces together. The weekend. Wait, why is she talking about the weekend in that?

[Kai]

No, she doesn't mean the artist. She means, like, the literal. Like, the end of the week. Like, the weekend. Like, you get nine to five. I get, like, the weekend. Like, two days.

[Enya]

Yeah, the weekend is a really awful vibe, and I don't really want to go into it any more than I have to, but really, just, like, I saw some today that actually scarred me for life and made me very uncomfortable.

[Kai]

Yeah, I think a lot of America can say that.

[Enya]

Yes, it's been. It was a very rancid wait, but.

[Kai]

Why do you get nine to five and I get the weekend?

[Enya]

You get nine to five on the weekend?

[Kai]

No, it's on the weekends.

[Enya]

Like, hello, we the try guy drama.

[Kai]

Oh, yeah, I think. So this thing happened. So this thing happened recently? No, it happened, like, two days ago, didn't it?

[Enya]

It. Yes. Yes, it happened two days ago.

[Kai]

No, enough time has passed that I. We can, like. Yeah, we don't like talking about pop culture things, because I just don't like doing that. It's like, I don't know that I care to, like, given my public opinion, but enough time has passed that this is literally hilarious to me.

[Enya]

Like, yeah, like, have you. The world's reaction to a man cheating was the craziest overreaction I've ever seen. One, like, and I don't give a if this is an unpopular opinion because I literally don't care because aren't they still together? Like, we should have listened to the person that was cheated on. If she's okay. Like, I wonder.

[Kai]

I don't, I actually don't know.

[Enya]

Don't know how it ended, but them firing him because of that was great. Actually. No, wait, I'm thinking about it a little bit.

[Kai]

Oh, my God, he's litter. Well, because it's because he, like, had sex with an employee.

[Enya]

That part is like, that makes sense. I, I, I don't know. I just thought, like, the whole thing was hilarious.

[Kai]

Oh, my God. He literally hasn't posted since then. Imagine your last post being admitting that you cheated.

[Enya]

And never.

[Kai]

You would have to literally, like, hold me upside down above piranhas to get me to say that, and I'd still be like, dunk me. I don't go like, dunk me my hair. Dunk. Challenge.

[Enya]

Squid games challenge. But yeah, that's.

[Kai]

Dude, the Internet is literally just so funny. Like, it's just funny.

[Enya]

Like, the, the hysteria events, like the.

[Kai]

Hysteria over a man cheating on his wife, which is literally something that happens all the time.

[Enya]

Your parents cheated on each other.

[Kai]

Especially, like, the biggest thing. I've said this before. Like, yeah, your parents probably have cheated on each other, but the. I've said this before, the biggest thing is when somebody is too keen on being like, like, I, oh, I love my partner. Like, I love my wife. I love my wife. I love my wife. You're cheating. You're literally cheating. Because why the are you saying that all the time? Like, you don't have to prove it to me. Like, go, like, get her flowers or something and shut the up.

[Enya]

Like, because if he wanted to, he would.

[Kai]

Exactly.

[Enya]

If he wanted to, he would genuinely, though, settle.

[Kai]

Do not settle. If you wanted to, he would.

[Enya]

No, but, like, genuinely, if he wanted to, he would, would. And that, like, resonates with me heavily.

[Kai]

If he wanted to. Yeah. Okay, that sounds.

[Enya]

If she wanted to, he would.

[Drew]

I. You're still not fully, you're still not.

[Kai]

Like, getting there all the way.

[Enya]

It's like, if he wanted to, she would.

[Kai]

I mean, if you wanted to, you would. Because also, like, you're supposed to do stuff for her. Girls aren't supposed to do stuff for boys in their relationship. Yeah, I should just be tweeted like a queen without trying.

[Enya]

Tweeted like a little queen. I'm literally a queen.

[Kai]

That's up is that came out by accident. But I knew you Would make fun of me. So I like, tried to keep it going.

[Enya]

Wait, that wasn't. Yeah, you said tweeted. Oh, my God. Tweeted like a queen. I thought you were joking. You should have just let me rock with it because I would have gone.

[Kai]

No, I just like, I'm not a liar like you, so I don't just, like, fake it.

[Enya]

Yeah, I don't give a. Lying is literally a blast.

[Kai]

Estate sales aren't real. Also, estate sales are actually really up. Like. Okay, well, two things. One, they're not real because I only see them on Tick Tock. I think estate sales are a figment of imagination that was created for Tick Tock. Exactly. You're weird. Why the are you stalking dead people's houses? To imagine an estate sale happening at your house and some random 20 year old going into your house and buying something for a quarter of your perceived value of it and being like, oh my God, I just got a steal and it's because this bitch is dead.

[Enya]

Dead.

[Kai]

Like, that's up. Don't let anybody have my. When I die, put that in a storage unit and like pay it off until I have no more money. And then in like 8 million years, when the defenders of like the Apple Pro goggles, like, go and find that because they have to just start burning everything in real life, then you can have my.

[Enya]

Oh, VR world.

[Kai]

Yeah. When everybody is like the defenders of like the world that's still here and they're like, no, we need to preserve this. But they're trying to burn everything. Think, let them burn my.

[Enya]

Yeah, I think it is like kind of a parasitic vibe. But, like, also, like, sometimes people just don't want to look at their dead partners or family's like, artifacts.

[Kai]

I mean, I also, I say all that, but I will be finding an estate sound.

[Enya]

Yeah, no, all of those videos, that one thing, the one and only thing they taught me about them was that I need to go. Like, I want to go. Also, I need a Frank Lloyd Wright home, like so bad. Bad. I just gave them. I gave them the sauce.

[Kai]

That's a song.

[Enya]

How has only five minutes passed since I looked at that thing? It feels like it's been like 10 years. This is crazy boots. But.

[Kai]

Well, we're doing a 45 minute episode. We're back to it. Especially because y' all got a two hour episode last week and didn't give.

[Enya]

Up a about it. Holy. I didn't even see one comment.

[Kai]

Also, I think next episode I'll be high as, so stay tuned for that oh, yeah.

[Enya]

We want to do a high episode. I'm considering this mother is like. But I really think it would be scary for y' all. Like, it would. It. It. Y' all would see a side of me that, I don't know, y' all are prepared to see because, like, of what weed does to me. It's Nacho. Really? Nacho?

[Kai]

You think? Oh, that was not chill. You falling out.

[Enya]

That would have not been chill. I don't know why that is so funny to you.

[Kai]

I know. I, like, I feel bad bringing it up because I. I do think you hate it, but it's literally.

[Enya]

I don't hate it. I hate what you think. The reason why it's because, like, just.

[Kai]

The way me and Josiah perceive it. That's what makes. Makes it so funny. Because, like, we know you well enough that we would never seen you react like that. It's like this clip from field trip. If you know, field trip, you're lit.

[Enya]

Oh, if you know, you know.

[Kai]

Yeah, if you know, you know. But from field trip, it's like a series me, Drew, and Josie did. And in the Farm episode, Drew was, like, doing pickup footage for, like, just, like, this self to care.

[Enya]

Also, they are stealing that Adsense. Sorry.

[Kai]

Oh, yeah. I mean, what. It's like, probably $20 a month, girl.

[Enya]

Those videos have views.

[Kai]

Shut the up. But, no, I think we own that account anyway. Actually, no, we should, like, run after them for that money. Oh, what was I saying? Anyway, Drew goes to film himself, opens the door, falls out, and then, like, is like, whoa. That would not have been chill. And then reenacted. It was like, whoa. I tried to, like, dude, it was the weirdest thing I've ever seen you do, and it's literally so funny. And then when I was really high the other night, I thought of it.

[Enya]

I think it just doesn't translate on camera that, like, when I watch it, it just isn't as funny as you and Josiah think it is, but it's because you all got to experience.

[Kai]

Because we saw it firsthand. It's literally like, it felt like because you were recording, you were like, oh, how do I make this? Like, a bit. But, like, you can't make it a bit. Fell the out of that trailer. And then the guy who ran the farm came, like, a second later in the midst of you, like, recollecting your thoughts, and you got so scared of, like, him knocking at the door. Also, what's so funny is then knowing that I left to go stay in that hotel room, and you and Josiah, seriously were freaking the out about staying on the property.

[Enya]

Yeah, it was scary as fuck in the middle of nowhere.

[Kai]

Yeah, couldn't be me. I would not have been scared.

[Enya]

But you know, did me and Josiah end up sleeping there? Did we go to a hotel as well? Well, we came to the hotel.

[Kai]

I think so.

[Enya]

Yeah. Yeah, we ended up going to the hotel.

[Kai]

Cuz you were terrified.

[Enya]

Yeah, it was bro. It was Horeshit. They were so pissed about that. They were like, bro, like just stay on the farms, save us money.

[Kai]

Whoa. That would not have been chill.

[Enya]

But that's the tea of it all. Save those notes for next week.

[Kai]

Yeah, I know. Let's get into some media.

[Enya]

I watched the new Spider man movie and dare I say no, not even dare I say it is a masterpiece. And I know I say that about every single movie I see. And I talk about on here doing.

[Kai]

Sponsor posts on your pages because like you're being so real when you say that.

[Enya]

No.

[Kai]

And they should just get the bang for their buck. I guess you do it for free though, so they don't have to pay you. No one has to pay Drew to say that the movie was the best movie ever.

[Enya]

Cuz he simply will just say exactly. It was literally so good. It was so fun and exciting and fresh and new and it was just a whole. It was just a whole vibe that I craved.

[Kai]

I crave your vibe.

[Enya]

But yeah, that movie. Go, go watch it like yesterday. Go watch it like yesterday. And then for some music. 1B63436969C31B D FB21B4992227 and it goes on a little bit longer.

[Kai]

Oh, you're being real. Wow.

[Enya]

That's the only song you'll get. And listen to it in a very dark, dark, senseless room and like just kind of vibe out. It's a really good vibe.

[Kai]

Well, mine is by ARCA and Safety Trance Cockiness by Rihanna. Still one of the best songs ever made.

[Enya]

My Cronut. Oh wait. Suck My Cat, Lick My Persuasion, I'm.

[Kai]

Making Love by Treaty, which I think I said said last week. And then still All Things Must Pass by George Harrison. I've just been listening to that album every time I get in the car. Guys, I have good news. I'm not gonna smoke cigarettes anymore. That was a lie.

[Enya]

On the 14th of this month, I'm stopping vaping for good. It's for my mom's birthday. I love you mother. And I want to be alive and not have lung cancer. So I'm doing this for you. You also. We have merch coming out soon.

[Kai]

Yes. Oh, my God. That's really soon. It's, like, in less than a month.

[Enya]

Yeah, we're. We didn't figure that out.

[Kai]

All right, well, thank you guys so much for watching. I hope you have a blessed day.

[Enya]

Blessed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, as earth as it is on heaven.

[Kai]

It.