The Perks of Being Drew Phillips

Summary

Podcast Summary: Emergency Intercom – "The Perks of Being Drew Phillips"

Introduction

In the March 8, 2024 episode of Emergency Intercom, hosts Enya Umanzor and Drew Phillips delve into a variety of personal anecdotes, humorous exchanges, and candid discussions. Titled "The Perks of Being Drew Phillips," the episode offers listeners an unfiltered glimpse into the hosts' lives, touching on topics ranging from milestone birthdays to health concerns and mental well-being.

Josie’s 18th Birthday Extravaganza

The episode kicks off with Josie celebrating her 18th birthday, a significant milestone that brings both excitement and anxiety. Drew engages Josie in a playful yet serious conversation about her newfound adulthood and her decision to start an OnlyFans account.

• Josie on OnlyFans Revenue:
  [01:28] Josie: "I'm already making 50 grand a month."

• Drew’s Concern:
  [01:43] Drew: "But nothing's changed about your brain chemistry from yesterday to today. So maybe you let yourself develop a little more mentally and then you can decide if that's something you want."

Josie confidently dismisses Drew’s concerns, humorously asserting her financial success while navigating the complexities of adulthood.

Health Scares and Medical Adventures

A major portion of the episode focuses on Josie’s ongoing ear and sinus issues. She shares her alarming symptoms and the unexpected findings from her recent doctor's visit.

• Josie’s Health Journey:
  [10:18] Josie: "Something really bad happened to me. Like, actually bad."

She recounts experiencing severe ear pain and discovering significant sinus inflammation, culminating in the necessity for surgery.

• Drew’s Sympathy:
  [20:07] Drew: "See, my problem growing up so removed from healthcare and doctor visits is that I don't believe that in my head, I'm like, do a neti pot. You'll be fine. Keep it pushing."

Josie describes the doctor’s office as "young and hip," highlighting her interactions with sympathetic medical staff, including a particularly memorable encounter with a nurse named Andrew.

Mental Health and Therapy

The conversation shifts towards mental health, with both hosts candidly discussing their struggles and coping mechanisms.

• Josie on Mental Struggles:
  [15:00] Josie: "I feel like I'm battling my real-life legion. Like, my pathological liar. I just can't tell."

• Kai’s TMS Treatment:
  [40:37] Kai: "I've been doing TMS, which is, like, when you electrocute a part of your brain, literally, and it's supposed to stimulate it."

Kai shares his experiences with Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), a treatment for depression, emphasizing the surreal sensation of being "electrocuted" in the process.

Food, Cooking, and Late-Night Cravings

Food and cooking become a recurring theme as Josie and Drew discuss their culinary adventures and late-night cravings.

• Josie’s Gourmet Jacket Potatoes:
  [06:20] Josie: "We went and made gourmet for dinner last night. Jacket potatoes with tuna salad on top."

Despite initial reservations, both hosts find enjoyment in their decadent creation, highlighting their shared love for indulgent comfort food.

• Drew’s Tuna Sandwich Delight:
  [33:55] Drew: "I literally can't wait to eat a tuna sandwich right now. That's what's keeping me going, period."

Their discussions showcase a blend of humor and genuine appreciation for simple, satisfying meals.

Relationships and Social Dynamics

The hosts explore their relationships, both platonic and romantic, and the dynamics that come with close friendships.

• Josie on Friendship Expectations:
  [04:43] Josie: "Are you in a bikini or are you in like a speedo Bikini. Okay, what are you covering?"

Their playful banter reveals the depth of their friendship, navigating topics with a mix of teasing and support.

Media, Entertainment, and Dreams

Josie shares a vivid dream involving RuPaul and interactions with celebrities, while the group discusses their latest media consumption.

• Josie’s Dream Encounter:
  [27:26] Josie: "I had a dream about Trixie Mattel and Ricky Montgomery shooting a music video in a van. It was insane."

• Drew’s Movie Night Anxiety:
  [52:31] Drew: "I felt like if I got high, I would tap in. Like, I just know I would."

Their conversations about media highlight how entertainment influences their moods and interactions, often leading to humorous or introspective moments.

Fortnite and Streaming Antics

Towards the end of the episode, the hosts discuss the excitement around the new Fortnite season and the challenges of streaming.

• Drew on Fortnite Season Launch:
  [56:12] Drew: "Yeah, it's this week. So let's go. Big things coming."

• Stream Sniping Incident:
  [56:42] Drew: "I was playing on stream and somebody stream sniped us. Like, and I didn't notice until somebody posted a compilation."

These discussions emphasize the interactive and sometimes frustrating aspects of modern gaming and streaming culture.

Closing Thoughts and Reflections

As the episode wraps up, Josie and Drew reflect on their experiences, offering a mix of humor and heartfelt sentiments.

• Josie’s Final Reflection:
  [39:54] Josie: "We just potentiate each other every single night. And it's actually a really dangerous environment to be in, so I decided I'm not going to feed into it anymore, and you can't feed into mine anymore. And that's the tea. That's the real tea."

• Drew’s Encouraging Goodbye:
  [56:07] Drew: "We will all prevail. And maybe you hear the birds."

Their closing remarks underscore the importance of mutual support and self-awareness in maintaining healthy relationships and personal well-being.

Notable Quotes

• "I'm already making 50 grand a month." — Josie ([01:28])
• "But nothing's changed about your brain chemistry from yesterday to today." — Drew ([01:43])
• "Something really bad happened to me. Like, actually bad." — Josie ([10:18])
• "I feel like I'm battling my real-life legion." — Josie ([15:00])
• "I've been doing TMS, which is, like, when you electrocute a part of your brain." — Kai ([40:37])
• "We just potentiate each other every single night." — Josie ([39:54])
• "We will all prevail. And maybe you hear the birds." — Drew ([56:07])

Conclusion

"The Perks of Being Drew Phillips" offers a candid and humorous exploration of the hosts' personal lives, health journeys, and everyday adventures. Through relatable anecdotes and honest conversations, Emergency Intercom creates an engaging and entertaining narrative that resonates with listeners seeking both laughter and genuine connection.

Transcript

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like General Mills cereal, drumstick, frozen treats, outshine fruit bars, Oreo cookies, and Capri sun pouches. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Drew]

Wanna pull off the season's freshest trends? You just need the right shoes. That's where designer shoe warehouse comes in. Loving wide leg jeans. Pair them with sleek low profile sneakers. Obsessed with the sheer trend. Try it with mesh flats. Feeling Boho comfy sandals. Nail the whole free spirited thing. Find on trend shoes from the brands you love like Birkenstock, Nike, Adidas and more at dsw. Welcome back to Emergency Intercom.

[Josie]

Whoa.

[Drew]

I made it, guys.

[Josie]

The emergency intercom. Drews 18 18th birthday extravaganza.

[Drew]

How are you feeling now that you're 18?

[Josie]

Forever 17, baby. I started an only fans that's like.

[Drew]

I mean, you can do whatever you want, but you should maybe take some more time to think about that.

[Josie]

Absolutely not. I'm already making 50 grand a month.

[Drew]

But nothing's changed about your brain chemistry from yesterday to today. So maybe you let yourself develop a little more mentally and then you can decide if that's something you want.

[Josie]

That sounds like you're broke and jealous of my 50 grand a month month for the rest of my life.

[Drew]

Okay, 50 grand a month on Onlyfans. Hello? Have you heard what the other girls make? Like you're behind?

[Josie]

Like, actually let me check it right now. Oh, it's up to 300,000.

[Drew]

You didn't even open an app? Picked up your phone.

[Josie]

That's crazy. I almost made a million in a day too off of tips and so.

[Drew]

Wait, but then how did you get 300,000amonth? That's like not close to a million.

[Josie]

It'S subscribers, so that's. Oh, but I'll probably make closer to 2 million a month just based off of like sending people butthole pics privately. Because it's all bikini photos.

[Drew]

Okay.

[Josie]

Up front. Yeah. Just need a clear.

[Drew]

Are you in a bikini or are you in like a speedo Bikini. Okay, what are you covering?

[Josie]

Because it's really sad that women can't show their nipples, so.

[Drew]

Oh, so you're acting very patriotic and feminist bound.

[Josie]

Yeah, I'm taking a Stance and covering myself as like. You know what I'm saying? You get, you get what I'm saying?

[Drew]

Yeah. I'm trying to understand.

[Josie]

I cover my body because the woman can't free theirs. I'm a big proponent of free the nipple. We know this.

[Drew]

We know this. I talk about it all the time. Right.

[Josie]

But yeah, it was my 18th birthday or what? I literally am going to actually forget how old I am and just start. Okay, whatever. It was my birthday yesterday and I did not want to do absolutely fucking anything because growing older is horrifying and scary and I don't think we should celebrate getting one year closer to death. Okay.

[Drew]

We celebrate like nothing.

[Josie]

No one needs a birthday. It's all phony.

[Drew]

Yeah, I guess it is like kind of capitalistic when you think about it. It's so that restaurants can get a 10 person table and then everybody can argue over who's going to take the.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Did you see that whole conversation online? People were saying. Which I kind of agree with. People were saying that if, say it's my birthday and I invited all of you guys to a really expensive restaurant, you should cover. I should cover it. Because I'm choosing like this expensive restaurant. So to assume all my friends can cover their tab would be kind of ridiculous. I agree with that. Up until you have a homegirl who's like getting fud up, like, don't come to my birthday dinner and get like 18 margaritas and a fucking espresso martini to top it off and then be like literally the homegirl in question. And then I have to pay for it. But I feel like we've always done that because we're just like good people. We will like cover. We cover the bill because we're just like, we're good and we're like so giving and nice and people don't talk about that. And we always write our usernames on the receipt after giving a hefty.

[Josie]

Give us a follow.

[Drew]

You should post.

[Josie]

Yeah, post us and tag us a follow. But yeah, it was my birthday yesterday and I was left here alone. All of my friends left me. You know what I got for my birthday? Do you want to know what I got? I got a $8 Fortnite card. Not even enough to cover a fucking skin. But they covered it by getting me a $25 Wingstop card.

[Drew]

I don't know. You get to eat good tonight.

[Josie]

Yeah. So Wingstop on me. It's literally just going to cover my meal. But y. That was the only gift I got. And I was so Excited because I was like, oh, and you're such a good gift giver. I know she's going to get me something so good.

[Drew]

Right? Right.

[Josie]

She didn't get me shit.

[Drew]

You may find that when every day waking up is hard, a gift is the last thing on my mind. But I gave you the gift of my presence.

[Josie]

Yeah, that's true. That's true. We did have a really, really great day yesterday, but. No, I'm just kidding. She did.

[Drew]

I treated my man to a gorgeous day full of candy and green.

[Josie]

I know. She took me to a Thai market and we got a bunch of Thai little treats and candies and I got a time ago.

[Drew]

It's on me.

[Josie]

Yeah, it was on in, wild out. It was all on Inya. And then Enya had the great idea. Okay. So I have been obsessed with this specific food item for months now. Haven't done anything about it. And you had the idea to make it. Guys, guess what? We went and made gourmet for dinner last night. Jacket potatoes with tuna salad on top.

[Drew]

You know what that is, guys?

[Josie]

Dude, you got a picture of it?

[Drew]

Oh, yeah.

[Josie]

It is a baked potato with a crispy skin. Three pounds of butter, orange and white cheese. I know it's cheddar and white cheddar cheese, but they call it orange and white. Jesus Christ. They call it orange and white cheese.

[Kai]

That looks so good.

[Josie]

And then you put British baked beans on top of that, and then on top of that you put tuna salad. And I know y' all. It sounds horrifying, but in. You can vouch for me. It was. I hate that it was so good. It was.

[Drew]

It was really yummy. Like I was expecting when we. Okay, so we, like, had a whole day. We went to the Thai market. Then. I'm the kind of girl who I need my coffee. So we stopped for me to get a coffee and I got like a little hand roll next door so I could, like, have something to eat because it was like 5pm and I had to eat in. And I was like, the last thing I need to do is wait till 8pm and the first thing that goes in my body is a jacket potato because it's gonna make you throw up, Jackie. So I already, like, had a little food, but I wasn't fully full. When we were at the grocery store getting all the ingredients, I literally drew was looking up the cheeses and looking at pictures, and I couldn't stop myself from physically gagging, like, fully shuttered, like.

[Josie]

Body took a fucking screenshot. Yeah, it was crazy.

[Drew]

Like, I was staring at his phone and thinking about what I was about to do to my body. And I couldn't fudgeing believe it. Because I pride myself so much in being, like, a relatively, like, good consumer of food. Like, I eat good food. I eat delicious, yummy food. And that sounds like a hydrogen bomb and a plate. And it did smell. What? Oh, it smell like tonsil stone.

[Josie]

Like, we. Okay, so I've been doing this thing. I've been recording a bunch of videos. They may never see the light of day, but it's me eating my bedtime double meals, and I eat it in my bed every night. And it's like this little series that I'm working on. And we ate it in my room, and we left to, like, take out the garbage and wash the dishes and shit. And when I came back into my room, y' all, like, this stench, the odor, like, it was really, really.

[Drew]

It was, like, heavy in there.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

So weird.

[Josie]

It stained my bed. Like, not, like, physically stained it. Like, the scent stained my comforter. Like, oh, like, absolutely not. But it was so good, y' all.

[Drew]

Yeah, it was delicious. I will say each of us only had half the potatoes. So if at home you're thinking of making a jacket potato, one potato does serve two. Because you'd be shocked how full of beans and tuna you get. Beans, tuna, potato, and cheese.

[Josie]

You get butter. Like, it's a lot of butter.

[Drew]

It's a lot of fucking butter. And we got a nice ass butter, which was cracking us up because we asked Sydney Carlson, like, if you don't know, she's like, sexy, hot girl, makes amazing food, and she always does these, like, very cute videos. And I want so badly to convince her to do a video of her making a jacket potato. Like, her just serving cunt and. And, like, her little, like. And then the ingredients list goes up, and it's literally potato, tuna, salad, baked beans, cheese. Like, I need her to make it so badly. But we asked her what a good butter was, because for some reason, we were like, we're gonna get, like, the finest ingredients for our.

[Josie]

Check it out.

[Drew]

Like, we're gonna make it fancy pants. And she sent it to us. And then, like, four hours later, we didn't tell her what we were making. We never told her why we needed the butter. And we just sent her a picture, and she was like, oh, my fucking God, that looks like something a British. Yeah. All she said was, oh, my God.

[Josie]

That is all she said. I don't think she ever responded back to your text.

[Drew]

Oh, yeah, she would know because she had mentioned she was like, I'm obsessed with this British girl on TikTok and it looks like something she would fucking eat. And we were like, it literally is a British person food. Like, this is British people food. And she never responded, y' all.

[Josie]

Something really bad happened to me. Like, actually bad.

[Drew]

Like, okay, we like, insert the audio that we recorded the other night.

[Josie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But anyways, I got. I've had, like, ear pain. And like, my ear has been clogging for like a year and a half now. And I literally just, like, thought it was benign. And I was just like, whatever, it is not that deep. I've probably complained about it on here a couple times, but I was like, it's literally not that deep. Like, it's not, like, altering my life. But then, like, I started, like, falling asleep at night and, like, my ear would, like, hurt really bad. And I was cool. I was like, cool, I have, like, an ear infection. So I started looking some up, which you never do. And I looked up, like, why? My ear was, like, going in and out of, like, clogged mode. And like, four different people were like, oh, I had, like, a tumor in my brain next to my ear. And it would, like, it would physically block my, like, ear canal. And I was like, okay, cool, I have a tumor. Like, this is fucked up. And so turning the age that I'm turning, I get kicked off of my parents insurance. So I was like, oh, I'm going to, like, book this appointment really quick. Just get this over with. It's going to be nothing. Like, it's not that fucking deep. Like, whatever. Like, I'll get on my own insurance and I won't have to go to the doctor ever again. So I'm just, like, doing a little tune up before I go to my doctor or before I turn the age that I'm turning. Y' all will never know. Y' all will never know me when.

[Drew]

You couldn't Google your name and, like, that's the first thing that pops up. It's a lie, though. It's a lie. Yeah, you're in your Alexa Demi bag.

[Josie]

Exactly, exactly. But I went. And I was not thinking anything of it. Like, I went to the office for the ear, nose and throat, throat. Go doctor. They have sex with you there. It's really fucked up.

[Drew]

How fast can you get an appointment?

[Josie]

You can book on Zocdoc almost immediately. No, I literally booked it that night. And then I woke up the next day and when it was like the tea, but I went There. And the doctor's office was like young and hip and they were a vibe. And they were all like talking to me, like, how I speak. And it was just like, it was a fucking vibe in there. Like, it was. It was a key. And then like my gay ass doctor or my gay ass, like nurse assistant or whatever came out. And he was super gay and a vibe. His name was Andrew too. And we were just like having a key. It was like, it was literally so fun.

[Drew]

That's like. Remember recently when I was saying how it freaks me out now that all the doctors and nurses are our age?

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

And that just freaks me out because I'm like, you're literally a peer who I'm supposed to meet at a bar. Now I'm letting you poke my fucking stomach. Like, I'm literally terrified.

[Josie]

Scary as fuck. So he.

[Drew]

And I know you cheated and I know you.

[Josie]

Yeah, I know y' all bitches were using Fudgeing Google. And what was the Notes app or the Notes cards? Good. Notes. Goodreads. Some.

[Drew]

Yeah, it's not that they were using Chat gbt.

[Josie]

No, no, there's those. It's like flashcards that like have the answer to every single test question.

[Drew]

Is it like virtual?

[Josie]

Yeah, it's on Google, but whatever.

[Drew]

So, yeah, I never cheated, so I wouldn't know.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

But in reality, I actually never have studied once in my life. And I thought about the other day and I don't even know how I would begin to study. And I don't understand studying and it doesn't make sense to me. But keep going.

[Josie]

But my gay doctor, we're just like having a vibe. And then he sits me down in this chair that literally looks like it's gonna like kill me. It's gonna like squish me and use all my juices. I don't know. And he's like, oh, we're just gonna do a CT scan of your head. And I'm like, okay. Like, you're gay. Like, can you do that? Like, I don't know if you're allowed to do that. I'm kidding, y' all. But no, it was, it was a vibe. Like we were just like shooting the, like while this robot was scanning my brain. And then there was like another gay, like, CT scan technician. And they were like having like a gay conversation, like, across the, like, metal barrier. It was super chills, like a very lax environment. And I was like, oh, I like feel really comfortable in here. And then my CT scan pulls up on this big ass screen in front of Them. And they literally gay gasped. Were like. And I was like, like, what, guys? And they were like, come here. And I was like, what? And they, like, pointed to this side of my face. And, like, there was, like, in my sinuses, there was a black one and a gray one. And they were like, are you sure you don't feel any pain in your sinuses? And I was like, no, I don't feel anything at all. Like, what are you talking about? And they were like, are you sure? Because we haven't seen this, like, ever. Like, your entire right side of your face is, like, full of blood, pus, mucus, inflammation, and I've just been existing with that for years for God knows how long. And they were like, are you sure you don't feel anything? And I was like, no, I don't. So then they were like, okay, well, we'll put you in your room, whatever. And I went there for my ear, and now I'm freaking out about my sinuses. They didn't say about my ear. Why? Like, sit down in this chair. The doctor. Doctor comes in there, and she's really scary. And, like, about her. And I was like, okay, like, chill as well. Then she takes this long rod, this long with a camera on the end of it, and shoves it into my ear. And I started having a panic attack. I literally did not know. I was scared of things going inside of my face. And I don't think anybody just expects that. I don't suck dick. I don't suck dick. Like, stop. I knew you were going there. But I, like, this, like, long rod is, like, all the way in my fucking brain. And it hurts so bad, y' all, like, and there's little pinchers on the end, and she's, like, pinching around in there. And I'm like, what the is going on? And I start, like, kind of like having an anxiety attack, low key. And I, like, have to tell her to stop a bunch of times, and then, like, she'll stop. And then I'm like, maybe, like, it just feels like it's too big. Like, it's hurting the walls of my ear. Like, stop. And then she's like, okay, let's try something else. And then she puts the exact same tool in my brain, and it, like, hurts. And then I start freaking out because I'm like, oh. She's like, the sounds.

[Drew]

She's trying to hit the reset button on screen.

[Josie]

No, literally. That's literally what it felt like, the sounds it was making inside of my head. Like, I've never experienced anything like it in my life. And at one point I literally started laughing out loud because it was like, it was funny sounds. And she was like, why are you laughing? And she was like, are you okay? And I was like, yeah, I'm fine. But she was like, not fucking with my vibe after that because I told her she was hurting me and she got pissed at me. Literally sounds like, never mind. Anyways, she like proceeds to like, look at the screen and I could see her like, face turn a different color. And I was like, oh my God, here we go again. Like, this is not great. This is not the vibe. And anyways, she proceeds to pull out a earplug size. Like, you know the orange earplugs that you put in your ears? It was an egg sack of spiders that was just in my ear. No, I'm lying, I'm lying, I'm lying. It was like a plug of earwax that she was like, in.

[Drew]

Yes, Drew's just Dirty Boots.

[Josie]

No, no, no, no, no, no. It was because of my sinuses that it was like draining into my ear and it was like blood and earwax and it was so painful coming out, like. And then when I saw it, I was like, oh my God.

[Kai]

You get a photo?

[Josie]

No, I didn't. I asked. I asked her to take photos and she was like, no, we don't let you, we don't let you do that in here. And I was like, your technicians just let me take a picture of my CT scan. So like, I'm confused cuz you were.

[Drew]

King with them and she doesn't.

[Josie]

I know she did. Not with my energy, but anyways, she pulled that out of my ear. I swear to God, I thought she damaged my eardrum because like, you know when they say like smelling colors, like I was hearing frequencies out of this ear that I've never heard in my life and I was so sensitive and like, I really thought she punctured my eardrum. Dude, this ear now feels like dirty. Like it feels gross. And she looked at it and she was like, it's all fine. This one is like, it's still. Like I can. Like when I like tap shit. Like I can hear the frequencies that I've never heard before. Like it was really actually scaring me for like two days, but it's back to normal now. And then she got to my sinuses and it turns out that the last day I went to the doctor before I had to switch over to my new insurance, I have to get surgery. So on my sinuses. So I'm done. I'm done. It's over for me.

[Kai]

You have to get surgery.

[Josie]

Actually, yeah. They go up in my nose and inflate balloons in all of my air passageway and, like, break the cartilage. Because that's why it's, like, fucked up is because, like, I have, like, really, really tiny. I'm. My. My sinuses are so petite and small. I'm so tiny, but my air passageways are really small. So I have to go in and, like, inflate them with the balloon and break the cartilage, and I'm gonna be, like, bleeding out of my nose for four days. Like, it's hell. And they were like, don't blow your nose. Like, you're gonna want to blow your nose. And I was like, I don't blow my nose now. Like, what are you talking about? And she was like, that's why your sinuses are up. And I was gagged. I was literally gagged. But she was like, you're gonna want to blow your nose, but don't do it. And now I have, like, this strict. I have to go pick up, like, I get perks, though. So it's about to be a vibe. It's gonna be five. I'm gonna get up. I'm gonna take two at once and have a key. But long story short, after I realized that that is the office that is gonna be doing my surgery, at first I was like, oh, this is a vibe. Like, this is fun. But then when I found out that they're gonna be doing my surgery, I was like, oh, I'm gonna get a second opinion. I'm gonna go to another doctor and see what the vibe is.

[Drew]

See, my problem growing up so removed from healthcare and doctor visits is that I don't believe that in my head, I'm like, do a neti pot. You'll be fine. Keep it pushing. Like, I just can't comprehend actually getting a surgery.

[Josie]

Like, it's. It's a medical necessity, but I'd be fine. Like, I have, like, bacteria and shit in my sinuses, and I'm sure I could drain it out somehow and not have to, like, literally have, like, a little procedure done. But the problem is, is it would just be persistent because my airways are so small, and so it would just happen again after I got sick.

[Drew]

Do you think it's just going to happen? Oh, no. Because they're going to, like, bust your walls over.

[Josie]

Yeah, yeah, that's the. The surgery is balloons in my brain.

[Drew]

I would have assumed you've already had Your walls busted.

[Josie]

Oh, 100 times over. 100 times over.

[Drew]

That's a good leeway into. Well, we have to play the audio clip because I was talking to Drew about the surgery. Also. It doesn't help that Drew, like, everybody knows how I feel about Drew and his sicknesses and. And talking about being sick, I literally can't take it serious. I had a meter when we first met that I was like, oh, my God, is he okay? Now when he talks about having any illness, I literally feel like I'm battling, like, my real life legion. Like, my pathological liar. I just can't tell. And I should put a tracker on your car so when you say you go to the doctor, I can see if you're actually going to the doctor.

[Josie]

I have all of the notes, all of that.

[Drew]

I believe that you're getting surgery, but I just can't take it serious because also, you. You like, you love it, so.

[Josie]

Oh, I love it so much. Like, when I was pissed for, like, a few days because I was like, of course, the one time that I get surgery, like, I'm going to have to pay for it out of pocket and my insurance isn't going to cover it because I don't have fucking insurance. But I'm back to being excited because I found out that I'm covered to the end of the month. So we're going to squeeze me in and I'm going to be fudged up. I'm going to be like, little baby, like, high on perks and, like, all, like, cozy. And people are going to have to be, like, taking care of me and, like, picking me up from places and dropping me off.

[Drew]

It's going to be a vibe with Josiah. Did we get it in the audio message in the audio recording we got the other night? What, when you were like, yeah, who's going to pick me up and drop me off? I was like, nose goes, nose goes. And Josie said he'd do it, but I'll probably do it because it only makes sense.

[Josie]

My mom was like, I'll fly out there. And then she called me the next day and was like, actually, like, thinking about driving, like, I'll Uber you to the place back and forth. But I'm not driving in la.

[Drew]

Scared to drive here. Yeah, I'll drive you. And then you'll be so high that I'm going to whip the piss out of the car and you're going to be, like, shaking.

[Josie]

The balloons are going to fly out of my nose.

[Drew]

I'm. I'm going to, like, they don't stay.

[Kai]

In your nose, right?

[Josie]

Yeah, they like disintegrate. Disintegrate there. Yeah, they actually. I. I don't know, cuz they were like, you have like a post op in like four weeks, so maybe they go up in there and take them out or some like. I don't know.

[Drew]

That is so disgusting. Well, if you can't do the podcast, I got to find someone to replace it.

[Josie]

No, I'll be able to do the podc. Yes. I'm only, like, down for three days, and then I'm going to be bleeding for like a week. So I'm going to have bloody nose on the podcast and everybody's going to be like, oh, my God, Drew, are you okay?

[Drew]

Like, well, that's gross. And when I take you to the surgery, I'm not going to come directly home. I'm going to run all my errands and leave you in the car. Perked out.

[Josie]

Wait, they did surgery on a Drew? Kai, they did surgery on a Drew.

[Drew]

Should we talk about the, like, my scary thought process when we were watching RuPaul the other night?

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

I got home from hanging out with friends, and Drew and Josie were, like, six episodes into RuPaul and they were trying to catch me up, but I got really high really fast. And I had kind of mentioned it to them, but I don't like being like, guys, I'm about to be really high. Like, please be careful, because they will not be careful. They will try to scare me further. And we were sitting there watching, and we were all joking about, like, certain things. But then in my head, I don't know what it was. Oh, Josie made a joke because I, like, had said something. I was like, okay. To something someone did. Like, I didn't think it was good on the show. And Josie made the joke and he was like, see, that's why we waited for you to leave the house to watch this, because then we could be safe watching it without you. Like, we have a safe space without you. And then I was so high, I got so, so deep into my psyche. I was, oh, my God, what if my friends actually genuinely believe I'm homophobic? And, like, there's this ongoing conversation behind my back that I'm homophobic. And I got so scared. And then I don't know if, you know, I was, like, dead silent for.

[Josie]

Like, yeah, like five minutes.

[Drew]

Five minutes until y' all started joking again. Because I was like, oh, my God, maybe I am, like, disrupting their peace. Like, I am literally a problem.

[Josie]

Like, I Mean, it wouldn't be a problem for me, like, personally, like, you can be whatever. Like, you can be homophobic. Like, it doesn't bother me. It doesn't even.

[Drew]

Why wouldn't that bother you? Like, I feel like that would bother anybody.

[Josie]

Like, not me. I'm so. Absolutely not.

[Drew]

Oh, is it because you're straight so you don't care? Yeah, I think even if you're straight.

[Josie]

Though, that should come the rainbow Mafia.

[Drew]

But yeah, it was really funny. And then they were showing me it was actually greening me out. Like, I love that show, but every time we all have the same feeling when they do the musicals and stuff, it really freaks me out because I'm just like, oh, my God, it is someone's full time job to make a rusical. Like, they are on salary to make and produce the rusical that RuPaul does. And they did like an SNL skit. And there was this one girl who I don't know her name. She was freaking me out. Like, what is her name?

[Josie]

I don't know her name.

[Drew]

Insert the clip that we were, like, laughing so hard at.

[Josie]

It'll be like an untucked.

[Drew]

It never ends.

[Josie]

Okay, we're done. Bye, girl. And now is it though, it's not the one of her riding the house in the water, it's the one of her in the office. Like, yeah, yeah, there's.

[Drew]

And she goes, toodaloos for me. I'm making me.

[Josie]

So Lindsey Graham. She did. Lindsey Graham didn't know who Lindsey Graham was, so she just, like, did this whole fudgeing bit that she, like, interpreted.

[Drew]

It as, like, she read it.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

And it makes me so sad because I really feel like to be good at Drag Race, you have to be everything. You have to be funny, you have to be crafty, you have to be witty, you have to be quick. You have to be, like, super, like, ready to, like, snap back at somebody. You just have to be so well rounded in every course. And some people just don't.

[Josie]

Don't have that mark.

[Drew]

And like, and which is understandable because it's asking a lot of a entertainer.

[Josie]

Like, I couldn't be able to do it.

[Drew]

I would.

[Josie]

No, you wouldn't, babe. You wouldn't. You would start fighting. Yeah, that's what I was saying. Like, if Josiah started doing drag five years ago, he would be an all star on Drag Race already. Like, he really is, like, so good at that type of like.

[Drew]

But yeah, that was my story, is I got really scared. And then I told Drew the next Day. And he just laughed at me. He was like, what the are you talking about? And I was like, no. I literally was so scared for, like, five minutes. Like, I was so deeply in my head. And then I just started thinking about who I was as a person. And if you guys actually like me and like, if you ever had a problem with me, would you be, like, willing to tell me about it or would you just let me continue? Which I. I know y' all would tell me if you actually had a problem with me, but it was really scary.

[Josie]

No, I wouldn't. You've made an environment where if I say something to you and speak up, I can't. I get hit. She hits me. No. That's so funny that you mentioned that. Because I had a dream, I think I told you this morning or last night at 1am because I accidentally fell asleep at 9:30 and then woke up at 1:30. But in that timeframe, I had a dream about Trixie Mattel and, like, it. It was Ricky Montgomery, like, the singer, like, was shooting a music video in this van and he invited us over and we went over and we were just like, chatting. And then Trixie Mattel and Katya Somalochikova, I can't say her last name, Zoma Lo Chicoba came out, like, into the front door. And they were like, get out here. You marketable. I have it written down because, like, what does that mean? And then we went out there and took pictures with fans. And then I woke up and you.

[Drew]

Said that I stayed in the van.

[Josie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just me out there with Trixie.

[Drew]

So you had a bunch of pictures with Trixie and.

[Josie]

Yeah, so it was really, really an insane dream. Really an insane dream, y' all.

[Drew]

Yeah, it doesn't sound that insane when you put it into, like, that perspective. I had a scary dream, but I don't remember it. But I know that when you tried to wake me up the first time, I woke up from it and then I knocked back out.

[Josie]

I have been sleeping till 3pm every day.

[Drew]

No, the latest it goes is like one, but I haven't woken up at one in a while.

[Josie]

You and Orion did sleep till two. And it was the night after something scary happened. And I really thought the Idaho 4 massacre happened in our house and that Orion and Inya were murdered in her bedroom and that I was just existing in this house until 2. And then I went to knock on her door and I was like, imagining them, like, bloody and battered and bruised and I was like, cool. Like, I have to call the cops now, and they're going to think I fudgeing did this shit. And I didn't fucking do this.

[Drew]

No, it was actually because we stayed up so fucking late watching Love is Blind. And we. Then we. We stayed up late watching Love is Blind. Then we got in bed and we watched Tiktoks. And we only went to sleep when we did because the sun was fully up so crazy. And we were scared of the sun, like, keeping us up longer. So we were like, turn off your phone. Turn off your phone. Just go to sleep. Like, just turn it off because we're, like, gonna keep looking at it. Turn it off. And we both, like, turned off our phone and, like, turned over into, like, the pillow so that we could, like, go to sleep.

[Josie]

Oh.

[Drew]

And it was fun. It was a very fun night. Such an amazing vibe. Amazing vibes all around.

[Josie]

Did y' all finger each other?

[Drew]

No, not that night. We were too tired.

[Josie]

And you slept in my bed.

[Drew]

Oh, I literally did. And did we finger each other or what?

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Drew falls asleep instantly. Drew isn't a fun sleepover because he just knocks out. Like, we got in bed, and we were trying to figure out what to watch. He was like, honestly, just put anything on because I'm gonna fall asleep. And he did. He. Like, two seconds later, he fell asleep. That's what you did last night, too. Last night, we were sitting on his bed after eating the jacket potatoes, and he was like, damn, maybe that's my new food, because it's not even knocking me out. And then he laid on the bed, and we were watching something, and he knocked out. Ten minutes in, it was up.

[Josie]

It's up. That's another doctor appointment I need to schedule is to find out why I fall asleep after I eat.

[Drew]

Also, I came to the conclusion. Remember how Drew used to say our old couch had black mold? It never had black mold. It was the start of Drew's weird thing where he eats and knocks out and then go. Yeah, he would eat and then go lay on the couch and knock out. And he was the only one experiencing that. But he'd be like, guys, something so weird happens when I put my face in this couch. And he would always lay down and be, like, watching. Like, 10 minutes, I'm going to be asleep. And he would be asleep, but it was after he fudgeing, ate food. He would, like, lay on the couch and knock out.

[Josie]

Crazy fucking vibe.

[Drew]

Well, what's going to happen if you go to the doctor and you actually do have prediabetes and you have to change your eating habits.

[Josie]

Change my eating habit, will you? No, I'll eat what I eat until my feet fall off. Like, I'll be walking around with stubby legs if I have to give up Takis. Because I'm not giving up Takis.

[Drew]

You are so annoying.

[Josie]

If they say, give up, red 40 or take. We'll take your feet. I'll let them have my feet.

[Drew]

Just take my feet now.

[Josie]

I don't know. Exactly. Exactly.

[Drew]

Yeah, I guess. Who would you be without your nighttime concoctions? I don't know. Like, if you would lose yourself, you're having the same thing. People being like, who would I be? Like, I would lose all my spark if I took an ssri. That's you with your food. Like, I would lose all my spark if I wasn't literally feeding my gut the most diabolical.

[Josie]

That's the thing is my microbiome controls my brain. So I have, like, a very eclectic, weird microbiome in my gut.

[Drew]

And that's a weird way to describe a really unhealthy microbiome. I have an eclectic microbiome. You're thinking, like, there's, like, trinkets and charms in your stomach. No, it's literally like Red 40, corn syrup and acid.

[Josie]

Every time I eat, I kill them.

[Drew]

You kill all the health bacteria in.

[Josie]

Your gut every time?

[Drew]

No, but, like, once a month, you'll have a green juice.

[Josie]

Yeah, yeah. I've been good about eating green. I really have been. And don't even sit there in front like, I have it.

[Drew]

You had a single. I saw you eat a salad for the first time.

[Josie]

I ate a salad. I ate broccoli and broccoli on the side. It was hot.

[Drew]

Chicken sandwich, macaroni. He had A Reese's Take 5 Smarties, Peanut M&MS. And some other random shit in there. Oh, no. And a KFC chicken cheese pizza, which is a KFC chicken thigh with. It's like a fake fucking Parmesan. Like, yeah, it's a cheese. So he ate all of that with the salad on the side and that, mind you, that crunched in ranch.

[Josie]

Listen, listen. There's a yin and a yang are giving it take. And I have to balance the good with the evil. Cuz if I'm just eating good things for me, I'm going to be sad. I have to experience the bad to be happy. Oh, I am. I ate. Holy. No, don't deprive yourself of the things you want to eat. That's the takeaway. If I want to eat a salad I'm going to eat a salad.

[Drew]

Yeah, I eat what I want, but not the way you do. Like, I. I had that Mac and cheese from Dave's Hot Chicken. I was like, yeah, I'm going to have that Mac and cheese, but I'm also gonna eat like, not red 40 on the side with it.

[Josie]

My red 40 stare. Yeah, guys, it's been getting out of control. I eat like three meals at once at night in my bed.

[Drew]

It is a vibe, though, because I get a late night snack out of it. So I get to have my dinner at a normal human time of like 7pm and then around 1pm, I can just walk into Drew's buffet and it's like the nastiest things I've ever seen. And I get to have a bite of everything. I get to have all your evil food.

[Josie]

Evil. Evil.

[Drew]

For my late night snack, which is actually kind of a vibe.

[Josie]

Like, literally.

[Drew]

Thank you for that.

[Josie]

Actually, this is probably a problematic take, but I miss Bon Appetit Brad and Clara or Claire so fucking much.

[Drew]

Oh, yeah. I miss that era of, like, life because it also was like, a vibe.

[Josie]

And also, like, it was so fun shipping them, even though they probably hated each other. And like, I stumbled upon, like, Brad's tick tock recently and he's still weird and doing weird and I love him and he's sexy hot. And then I stumbled upon Claire and she's making tick tocks now and she's sexy hot. And it's just like literally such a vibe. Like, I love them and she's so Matrix. Matrily. How do you say that? Matrily?

[Drew]

I think so.

[Josie]

Is that how you say that, Kai?

[Kai]

Honestly, I don't know, but it sounds right.

[Josie]

And I just want her to hold me and she makes like, these like, browned butter sugar cookies with chocolate.

[Drew]

Like, I wish I had the lust for life that people who cook really good meals for them do, because I really make myself meals to survive.

[Josie]

We made jacket potatoes.

[Drew]

That's true. That's what was cracking me up is to Drew, I was saying how we haven't cooked. We haven't made a meal in this house that needs heat. What I eat. I can't even make fun of what you eat, because what I eat is you eat ingredients. Yeah. Eat ingredients.

[Josie]

Deconstructed is decons.

[Drew]

Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of like Michelin star vibe, like deconstruction.

[Josie]

It's cottage cheese and heart of palms.

[Drew]

That was on to something. The lady on tik tok who palm with mustard and cottage cheese that Is yummy. And I got the stuff to make it today, so I'm going to. Today I'm going to have a tuna sandwich.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

And heart of palm with mustard and cottage.

[Josie]

You know what I'm going to do is I'm going to have tuna and Ritz, and then I'm gonna get some cottage cheese, and I'm gonna scoop out half of an avocado one bite at a time, and then put the cottage cheese in the bite and eat it all at once. And y' all, I swear to God, it'll change your life. It'll change your life.

[Drew]

Well, the birds are back to chirping. And I think it's gonna be okay. I think it's all gonna be okay. Yeah. Cuz when like. Like, just wait till the hummingbird end and the birds are back to chirping outside my window. I do feel a little spark again. And I heard it yesterday. I was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God, guys, you were on.

[Josie]

A good one yesterday.

[Drew]

I'm literally gonna be okay. I see. Because I had to. I had to show up for my bae.

[Josie]

No, you were actually feeling good. You were happy.

[Drew]

Yeah.

[Josie]

Yeah. Let's say it that way.

[Drew]

Yeah. I was so happy. I was so happy.

[Josie]

Just wait. I'm happy.

[Drew]

I'm so happy.

[Josie]

Just wait till the hummingbirds come back and they're flying around our living room window.

[Drew]

Dude, I feel like we have to insert it. There's this tick tock of Josie, and I either feel like that picture or I feel like the character running through a Silent Hill map. Those are my two variations of mental states right now. And I'm to the point that usually talking about my mental state will make me burst into tears, but I actually feel nothing. Oh, my God. Wow. Makes you think I feel nothing. Like, I literally. It is actually so funny where my mental state has been, but I'm just hoping and praying that it goes away soon or I start taking an SSRI and I never have to feel this again. And that's my vibe right now. Because being 25 post 5 years of therapy and still feeling like this. Something's not adding up. Something is not adding up. But yeah, that's my. That's my mental update. I feel like I give, like a yearly around this time and a mental update. And just so you know, I'm right back to where I started. Yeah, I did. I did the circle, and I'm right back to the starting point. But it's okay because I just get high as fuck and I play fortnite and I act like I don't exist, and then it's fun. It's fun. Or if we do stuff like yesterday, when I just distract myself all day. But then at night, Drew fell asleep way too early, and I was alone with my thoughts for, like, four hours, and I felt insane. I was so down bad, I played a U2 song on Fortnite Festival to distract myself. That's how down bad I am. Because I've played the Lady Gaga and the Olivia Rodrigo songs too many times, and I don't want to play Fudgeing a Nelly song. Why is that in the Fortnite, like, festival? Like, it kind of makes no sense. I don't want to play a Nelly song. I don't. I'm so sorry. I don't give a fuck about Blink 182. Like, oh, kill me. I don't want to play that. I want fun girl songs. Like, where's all the girl songs? So I played a U2 song, and I just sat in silence, alone in the living room playing a YouTube song on Fortnite Festival, and I felt like my head was gonna explode. But then Drew woke up and told me about his dream. And then I got up, and I was like, I need to go to bed, because this is not helping me right now.

[Josie]

And sending you to the dark place.

[Drew]

Right. Right.

[Josie]

Well, I am just so incredibly happy and just so happy.

[Drew]

I'm so happy.

[Josie]

I'm so happy.

[Drew]

I'm so happy.

[Josie]

No, Everything she said, I'm feeling.

[Drew]

So we're just like this bubble.

[Josie]

We just potentiate each other every single night. And it's actually a really dangerous environment to be in, so I decided I'm not going to feed into it anymore, and you can't feed into mine anymore. And that's the tea. That's the real tea.

[Kai]

And I've been electrocuting my brain.

[Josie]

Yeah, I. I was gonna bring it up, but I was like, I'm gonna let Kai talk about that because that is not my tea.

[Kai]

You know what's crazy is, so I've been doing tms, which is, like, when.

[Josie]

Girls have periods and they're like, no.

[Kai]

Really angry. No, it's not the same as that. That's pms.

[Josie]

Oh.

[Kai]

Not me educating you. So I. I basically doing this thing where you, like, you electrocute, like, a part of your brain, literally, and it's supposed to stimulate it.

[Josie]

It's a vibe. I've heard of it.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Josie]

There's a lot of research to work.

[Kai]

We'll fucking see. Because every time I'm in that chair. I feel like I'm in Clockwork Orange and my fucking memory is being erased.

[Josie]

Your eyes are, like, pulled.

[Kai]

Yeah, but the first. I went in for, like, the first one, and the person that was, like, helping me with it was like, what do you do for work? And I was like, oh, I, like, produce this podcast. And he was like, oh, emergency intercom. And then he, like, pulled the switch and, like. And I was, like, getting electrocuted. And it's not like I'm, like, kind of, like, joking when I say it's like you're getting electrocuted, but you.

[Josie]

Yeah, like, you literally are burning flesh.

[Drew]

It's like your. Your brain is touching like a. Like a dangerous socket.

[Kai]

And.

[Josie]

Are you telling me your doctor that's electrocuting your brain listens to this podcast?

[Kai]

Well, the person that set me up. Yeah, I haven't been paired with them again, but that's so gag worthy. But I was like, you're literally strapped into a chair, like, tied into it. Because they don't need to move because if you go too far to the right, then you, like, your brain turns up.

[Josie]

Yeah, I've seen videos of it. It's like, pretty intense. Like, they're like, it was just the.

[Kai]

Craziest situation because I. They have Roku on, and then it's just like drone footage of, like, farmland. And he was like, cool. Like, how long have you guys been, like, doing that? Like, I just started listening recently and I was, like, getting electrocuted.

[Josie]

Damn. He wasn't even listening. Like, he's not even og.

[Kai]

I think he's, like, been a fan for, like, a couple months, but.

[Drew]

Okay, then we give him.

[Kai]

Yeah, yeah, but he was really sweet and it was actually kind of fun talking to him. Well, I got like an electric current pulsating through my.

[Drew]

Yeah, I think that's a better situation is having, like, a semi normal conversation with somebody rather than like a sterile ass doctor just being like, you ready?

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Okay. Again.

[Kai]

Yeah. But they've been up in the power every single day, and it's to the point where, like, my face twitches.

[Josie]

Yeah, it's daily, y' all. He's gone. He has, like three more weeks of daily brains.

[Drew]

Do you feel like it's helping?

[Kai]

I'm gonna be honest. I. I have felt better. You have a couple weeks. Like, I feel like you can pick up on it a little bit.

[Josie]

Yeah. I was gonna say you've, like. Yeah, every time we've, like, had our hour long phone calls, me and Kai talk on the phone. I have a screenshot. We talk on the phone for, like, an hour almost every night. It's a vibe, but, Yeah, I just, like, keep mental notes. And you're.

[Kai]

I've been feeling better. It's been, like, the first time in, like, nine months, but with all of this, I'm like. I'm not gonna say it's a success until it's, like, six months deep.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Kai]

But. But, yeah, it's been. It's been good, and I think it's a really funny thing to do.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Kai]

Which is the most important.

[Josie]

It's a bit. It's a bit.

[Kai]

Yeah. I feel like I'm, like, literally a cartoon character.

[Josie]

Dude. I've been doing this thing called masturbation. Have you all heard of that?

[Drew]

Yeah, we. Yeah.

[Kai]

Yes.

[Drew]

That's not like a. I don't know. I actually think that might be. If you do it too much, I actually think that might be bad for you.

[Josie]

No.

[Drew]

Oh, are you proving the statistics wrong?

[Josie]

You're like, I just did it. I just did it just now. Like, literally just now.

[Kai]

You know the, like, thing where, like, samurais that are really good, like, barely.

[Josie]

Open the swords flat.

[Kai]

That's you both.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Kai]

With your wiener.

[Josie]

Ew.

[Drew]

Ew. Y' all are nasty boots.

[Josie]

Have I ever told the twin experiment in college?

[Kai]

Yes.

[Josie]

Yeah, I've talked about that on the podcast. No, I didn't, I swear.

[Kai]

You have.

[Josie]

What is it?

[Drew]

Why do you think we're lying?

[Josie]

What is it? If I've talked about it, it's.

[Drew]

It's like they tried to take, like, you and Madeline, or you thought they took you and Madeline for, like, a. Like, a study or some. You've talked about, like, a twin experience on here. Yes, I part the story multiple times.

[Josie]

Okay, well, they are gentrifying the pyramids, and it's. I swear to God, they are. They literally are gentrifying the pyram. Like, they're going in there and they're adding up fake plaster rocks to, like, rebuild to what they looked like instead of leaving them in the ruined state they are in now. And it's really.

[Drew]

Well, no, it's a rap when they have a tripod with the ring light and the iPad between it.

[Josie]

No, they already do have that. Like, it's crazy. They have, like, photo areas.

[Kai]

Like, added a blue bottle to the middle of it.

[Josie]

Yeah, yeah, there's a blue. But the chamber.

[Drew]

Like, if I was out there in the middle of nowhere, I'd be like. Like, I want a coffee so bad. And then I'd see it. I'D be the first person in line.

[Josie]

Yeah. We got to get out of there, though. Like, literally, we got to get out of those tombs.

[Drew]

Yeah. Because it's, like a sacred place.

[Josie]

Exactly. Like, people have got to leave. But I want to go. I want to go so bad. I want to feel the echo chamber. There's, like, a vibration room, like, inside of there where, like, one of the bodies was buried. Were buried. And the frequency that reverberates out the walls is, like, in, like, whatever. Whatever. It's cool. It's lit. I want to go inside the pyramids. And me and Madeline and Stephen were planning a trip, but.

[Drew]

Oh, yeah. Right before COVID Yeah.

[Josie]

But then they were like, you can't go.

[Drew]

So I don't know if there's any landmark I've ever been like, I need to go there. There's, like. I don't think I have a single one.

[Josie]

Oh.

[Drew]

Like, I don't. I can't even think of a landmark.

[Kai]

What's that big ass thing that's, like, flat.

[Josie]

Drew's penis.

[Drew]

Why would it be.

[Josie]

I was trying to get it in before. You said flat Drew's ass there. It's big.

[Drew]

Wait, but what a big flat.

[Kai]

It's where the aliens, like, touch down, and it's in the United States. Like, this huge plateau.

[Josie]

Oh, no, no. Is it.

[Kai]

It's, like, called Devil's Plateau or something?

[Josie]

I don't know.

[Drew]

I don't know about that.

[Josie]

I think it's that, like, is it sacred land?

[Kai]

Devil's Tower?

[Josie]

I think some dude parachuted out of a plane and landed on that, but didn't have a way to get down. So, like, this.

[Kai]

This is insane.

[Josie]

Yeah, yeah. Some dude jumped out of an airplane, landed on it in, like, the 30s, and then didn't have a way to get down, so he was just trapped up there for, like, a week and a half.

[Drew]

That's a Mr. Beast video.

[Josie]

Literally, it became, like, national news. And, like, they had to send, like, supply drops with, like, like, propeller airplanes, and they would just drop, like, food and shelter for him every day. And then eventually, like, five rock climbers, like, climbed up and then climbed him down. Isn't that tea?

[Drew]

I'm just thinking about how there's nowhere I want to visit, and it's freaking me out, but really, I've just decided I don't really give a about.

[Josie]

You don't want to go to Iceland and see the volcanoes in the silver suit.

[Drew]

Yeah, but that's different because that. That's not like, a historical. Like, it's not one of the seven wonders of the world, necessarily. I just want to see it because I saw a movie about lavas and volcanoes, and I know it'll be pretty. I want to do that kind of stuff, but I want to, like, get into, like. All I really give a about when I travel is if I could go somewhere and get into a body of water. That's what I want.

[Josie]

And if they have a Dover street market with the rare Dover street market clothing.

[Drew]

No, I, like, literally have decided I don't like to travel for cities.

[Josie]

What you got to do is you got to get high and then watch a documentary on the pyramids, and then it'll be the only thing you can think about for six months.

[Drew]

Just sounds like it'll, like, that environment will up my eczema. That's all I can think about when I look at the desert. Like, watching Dune, I was like, dude, this would destroy me. Like, it would feel like my skin was a suit.

[Kai]

That recycles your pants.

[Josie]

Yeah.

[Drew]

That's so gross.

[Josie]

No, I'm entering my architect arc soon, y' all. I think I'm gonna start building little houses in the middle of the wood and. Or in the woods in the middle of the wood. I'm gonna, like, go to Home Depot and buy, like, plywood and. And just build, like, houses.

[Drew]

I'm imagining you, like, getting, like, like, nails and building something and it falling over and you go, like, freaking out the way you do and something up. You're like, oh, my God.

[Josie]

Kill myself. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, no. If I'm out alone, I can't yell because I'm not yelling towards anybody. Oh, I ate again.

[Drew]

I think you might still yell. I would yell.

[Josie]

Not me. I'm different.

[Drew]

You don't talk to yourself at all.

[Josie]

Yeah, I do. I do a lot. I'm crazy, y' all. I'm crazy. I'm so crazy. All right, okay, well, let's get into some media. We watched Dune 2. We did a back to back double feature. One here at the crib. It was three hours. And then we went to the theater and watched Dune 2 for three hours. Dune 2 is awesome. Duh. Everyone says it's awesome. It is awesome. It was like. There were some comparisons made before where I was like, girls, like, what the are you talking about? Like, people were saying it was, like, better than the Godfather and, like, one. Why are you comparing those two movies too? Like, it's literally not. So, like, don't say that. But it was good as. And it it is something you should go watch. Point blank, period.

[Drew]

Yeah, that was the thing that Drew. That was Drew's birthday wish for us all to do is to see Dune 1.

[Josie]

And actually, no, I literally just forgot it was my birthday when I bought the tickets. And it was my birthday rolling into my birthday as we got in there. And then everyone was like, oh, it's your birthday. Like, I'll come and join.

[Drew]

Yeah, that's why I did it. Because I was like, I know. Because now that I've pointed it out, that it rolls into. Because I pointed it out and I was like, I don't really want to go, but I guess it's kind of like your birthday wish. And you were like, oh, yeah, I guess it is. I guess you have to do it unless you don't give a fuck about me. Like. And he said it to me and Josie because me and Josie were like, we're not doing that. We don't want to. But me and Josie sat next to each other during it. But when we were here, I was like, I feel like if I got high, I would tap in. Like, I just know I would. Because watching across the spider verse in that state literally had me thinking that I made the movie. Like, it was the craziest feeling I've ever felt. I was like. Like, oh, my God, it was so gorgeous being a part of this movie. That's what it made me feel like. And then watching Dune 1, I got so tapped in in a way that I. I genuinely don't believe I would have sober because I'm such a bitch about sci fi and I don't really care for sci fi because I grew up in a household with a parent who really liked Star Wars. So I grew up watching those movies all the time. And they would piss me off. And I would always take a nap and be like, wake me up when this shit's over. Like, I don't want to fudgeing watch this shit again. So I don't like sci fi because of that. And I was so tapped in. And me and Josie sat next to each other for the second one. And we sat next to a man who did not with our vibe. Like, we are respectful. We did not talk during the movie, but during the ads and, like, the random trailers, we were making jokes to each other about it. And he wouldn't look at us, but he was doing this the whole time, like. Like just staring at us. And we were like, oh, my God. And he, like, didn't. Like, they were sitting behind us. So I would get up to go get snacks from them and come back down. And when I would be coming back down, I would literally just watch him, like, stare at me into my seat. And, like, he didn't want to turn his head to us, but we knew he was so unhappy to be sitting next to us. No, during the movie, I literally said to Josie, I was like, okay, during the movie, we're not going to talk because this man's actually going to stab us. Like, don't speak to me. Me and Josie did not utter a single word to each other during that movie because he gave me the aura that he was actually going to, like, like, stab me. A mass stabbing was going to happen to me and Josie if we even breathed too hard during that movie. So we didn't speak during the movie. Also, there was one point where I was falling asleep because I don't think any human should watch six hours of Doom. Also, I cheat coded that because y' all hoes waited four years to see the second one. I got to binge it like, it was Love is Blind. Like, I just saw the whole thing in one night. It was lit, and I was the only one who clapped after.

[Josie]

Dude, it was so funny. Me, Josh, and Lucas and Christian were, like, dying laughing because in you, like, clapped and went woo. It was silent. Like, it was so silent.

[Drew]

Like, y' all aren't vibing the way I was. And I had a really good time, and it was freaking awesome. And then I came home and I knocked out. That's my story.

[Josie]

It was a vibe. It was a vibe. It was the best birthday I've ever had in my life. Okay, well, then my music media is. I made a new playlist on Spotify, and it's called I want to like music again. So polite. So bad. Please let me enjoy music. This is out of control. And it's because I don't like music right now. Hence, my media has been so boring. Go listen to that playlist if you want to hear what I'm trying to like right now. And it's mainly just all India in Orion's music that they put on in my vicinity. And that's my media.

[Drew]

My media is Nothing Stays the Same by Elastica, Claire de Lune, Number three by Claude Debussy. Busy wondering who by the Jacksons. And it only happens delegation. Oh, and roll on, babe. Ronnie Lane.

[Josie]

Spray on, bitches. My favorite song is Spray On. Okay, Drew, sigh up corner. Drew, sigh up corner. Y' all want to try fentanyl? Try Fentanyl. This dick in your Mouth.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. Okay.

[Josie]

Oh, my gosh. Folklore Evermore Cankersaur. I don't give a fuck. Where's the liquor store? This girl just put $1 on pump two. Where the she going? Pump three, man.

[Drew]

Oh, wow.

[Josie]

These are all screenshots from my email. So y' all gotta get better. Do better, y' all. Okay, let's see.

[Drew]

I literally can't wait to eat a tuna sandwich right now. That's what's keeping me going, period.

[Josie]

This one's so stupid. Got a meatloaf flavored vape from Goodwill, and now my arms won't bend. Eric, Ivan. Wolf. Okay, well, that sucked.

[Drew]

Oh, my God.

[Josie]

I'm done with y' all. Send me good next time. How about that? Okay.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. You're so evil. Well, that was it for the episode. Sorry if we bummed you out.

[Josie]

We?

[Drew]

You said you agreed with me.

[Josie]

No, it was a wee thing.

[Drew]

I hope everybody. I feel like everybody's in a bit of a slump right now, so.

[Josie]

Yeah. Love you.

[Drew]

We will all prevail. And maybe you hear the birds. Yeah, maybe the birds will save me. Like, bitch, that's not the down bad. I'm like, the birds are.

[Josie]

The bird is the word, y' all. The bird is literally the word.

[Drew]

All right, thank you, guys for watching.

[Josie]

Peace and love.

[Drew]

The good news is the new Fortnite season comes out.

[Kai]

Like, oh, when is that?

[Drew]

Is it this week? It might be today.

[Kai]

Really?

[Drew]

Yeah, it's this week. So let's go. Big things coming. Big things coming.

[Kai]

Because I'm gonna get drunk alone and play for hours.

[Drew]

Dude, I, like, can't play Fortnite. Not sober because I suck so bad. But I've been sucking really bad because it's to the point of the season where all the, like, crazy are playing. Yeah. And it's just only the people. Only the streamers. Yeah. And like. Like, you are playing right now.

[Kai]

Thank you.

[Drew]

So I'm just getting. Mercy worked. Also, we got stream sniped.

[Josie]

Oh, yeah.

[Kai]

Really?

[Drew]

I was playing on stream and somebody stream sniped us. Like. And I didn't notice until somebody posted a compilation of how many times me and Drew got killed in a game we were playing. And the same person killed me twice. So you're evil. Okay.

[Josie]

Loser.

[Kai]

Also, guys, I know I've been making all these jokes about drinking alone. They're not jokes every night. No, they're jokes. They're jokes. I have. I'll have, like, five beers.

[Drew]

Oh, that's a lot.

[Kai]

Okay. All right.

[Josie]

Said I was pushing 50.

[Drew]

I am you are not pushing 50.

[Josie]

I am.

[Drew]

You're barely pushing 30.

[Josie]

But no, if you think about it, 25 is halfway to 50. Anything over 25 is pushing 50. So I'm pushing 50, y' all.

[Drew]

Well, I'm pushing P. So penis, penis, penis and vagina.

[Josie]

We're all gonna make it through this, guys.

[Drew]

We will. Listen to the birds. All right, bye.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and safeway. Now through June 24th. Score hot summer savings and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags on items like General Mills cereal drumstick, frozen treats, outshine fruit bars, Oreo cookies and Capri sun pouches. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.