Enya (3:20)

We have. You never know. That's another tangent. But there was like this like, governmental program that like sent out free baseball tickets to a bunch of, like, the most wanted felons and criminals, like, to their emails, and they ended up arresting, like almost 2, 000 people showed up to this free game and they all got arrested.

Drew (3:41)

Like, that is so up. But also like, come on now.

Enya (3:45)

It was like murderers and killers and it was in like the early 2000s.

Drew (3:49)

But it's also so funny because, like, why did you think you were randomly getting a ticket?

Enya (3:54)

Like, they like, pulled up and they were like, like just chopping it up with everyone. And they're like, oh, I also committed a crime and, like, people are getting wise about it.

Drew (4:03)

Yeah, but I'm gonna do that with everybody I find attractive. And then. I'm not gonna finish that sentence, actually.

Enya (4:13)

Okay.

Drew (4:14)

I'm gonna practice self respect and control.

Enya (4:19)

It's going to be hard for you. You don't have a lot of respect for yourself.

Drew (4:22)

Yeah, I'm lacking. I'm lacking really hard. Can you get that for me?

Enya (4:26)

You're lacking in a lot of things.

Drew (4:27)

What else?

Enya (4:30)

I'm not gonna go there. I'm not gonna go there.

Drew (4:33)

Drew's been trying to convince me to, like, get a boob job to get bigger boobs because he says that sometimes they're hidden under my clothes and he doesn't like that.

Enya (4:41)

Yeah, it's just like, I need to see more of my girl's body, but if another man sees it, like, it's gonna.

Drew (4:49)

If you wear that out, you're like literally a certified because that should be for my eyes only. Even though the reason I got with.

Enya (4:56)

You is because I'm making album called For My eyes only.

Drew (5:00)

And what's it gonna be about?

Enya (5:02)

Just music to people's ears.

Drew (5:05)

Is that gonna have, like, you're just gonna have that?

Enya (5:08)

Like, did Drake make an album called for your eyes only?

Drew (5:11)

No, it's for all the dogs.

Enya (5:13)

No, no. Like, there's an album for your eyes only or something like that number.

Josiah (5:18)

For your eyes only.

Enya (5:19)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Drew (5:21)

You could take it still.

Enya (5:22)

Okay, but finish.

Drew (5:24)

Oh, yeah. So, like, it had that. And I think I just put keep the money for myself, which is kind of my vibe recently. Like, my money hoarding. I'm entering money hoarder.

Enya (5:35)

I literally have a note saying that we need to start hoarding wealth again. We need to make hoarding wealth great again.

Drew (5:41)

I believe in hoarding money. I don't believe in equal pay.

Enya (5:44)

Yes.

Drew (5:46)

I think you should take advantage of people.

Enya (5:49)

A billion dollars isn't that much money. It is not enough money. Like, I don't think people, like. Like, if you work hard for your money off, like, other people's labor, and you're just smart enough to just take advantage of other people and, like, pay them dog scraps while you hoard the wealth sitting in your corner office in a skyscraper, like, you deserve 3, 4, 5.

Drew (6:14)

Because you worked for that.

Enya (6:16)

You had to put all your morals.

Drew (6:17)

Aside and become a psychopath. And that's not easy.

Enya (6:20)

You were evil.

Josiah (6:20)

I was watching Succession. It wasn't until three seasons in that I watched, and I was like, oh, these are supposed to be rich people to me. I was like, these are poor people I'm watching.

Drew (6:30)

Yeah. Like, they don't have nearly as much money as they should, like, until you're in the billions. I'm like, what's the point?

Enya (6:35)

Like, yeah, Yeah.

Drew (6:36)

I actually can't believe that some people genuinely think that. That they're like, dude, a billion is nothing to me.

Enya (6:41)

I love the, like, hardcore bootlickers that are like, they worked hard for that money. Like, define hard. No, they didn't.

Drew (6:50)

Yeah.

Enya (6:50)

They did not work hard. The people that are working hard are the cashiers that have to interact with nasty, entitled, gross people like you. Exactly. Demanding their snack wrap.

Drew (7:05)

Now I'm so congested, it's disgusting. I'm still sick. If anybody cares, I probably have white lung.

Enya (7:12)

Yeah. Oh, don't even get me started. Don't even get me started. White Lung Covid 2.0. Around March next year. Of course, it's the same time around elections that a new scary disease is taking over the planet. Ironic. It's kind of ironic. We don't Know what the it is? It's affecting our kids and our children. The white lung is coming for you. Prepare for another jury convinced he has white lung. Prepare for another shutdown.

Drew (7:42)

You are literally a hypochondriac. Because he said something to me yesterday. I didn't say anything because I was like, I'm gonna let you rock because you're also falling asleep, but from my room, because he's also been sleeping in my room.

Enya (7:50)

Oh, wait, yeah, let me. Let me. Let me talk about that real quick. So I started a major 3D print project for my blind box toys. We'll insert the photos of the failure that it was, and then we'll. We'll tease, like, some, like, a nice little figurine that actually looks good that still broke, but I, like, started and embarked on this journey. And, like, the fumes from that 3D printer are so toxic and evil that, like, literally for the past, like, two or three days, like, I actually have not been myself. And I have fully melted the brain cells that I had left in my brain because, like, I was, like, interacting with this, like, liquid, uncured resin that's super gaseous, and, like, the fumes just, like, latch onto the oxygen molecules and, like, take over it. I don't know the science behind it, but, like, long story short, it's carcinogenic and it stops the oxygen from getting to my brain. So I've been sleeping in India's room because I've been trying to air my room out for the past four days, but it still smells hella toxic.

Drew (9:02)

And from the hallway, he, like, yelled at me as he was falling asleep in my bed, and he was like, I think I have. What's the word?

Enya (9:09)

Turn off the light. Hypoxia.

Drew (9:11)

He's like, I think I'm suffering from hypoxia. And I was like, what is that? And then he, like, read it. He's like. So I've been doing some research, which, like, googling your symptoms is not doing some research.

Enya (9:21)

No, no, I just. I didn't do no research. I just know hypoxia oxia is, like, off the top of my head, like.

Drew (9:28)

As it's a lack of oxygen hypochondriac. Because. Why do you know that?

Enya (9:32)

Like, well, it's because I was, like, doing, like, anatomy and physiology and all those medical.

Drew (9:36)

Which is, like, the worst thing you could have ever done because now you think you know what's happening.

Enya (9:40)

No, I literally also have a note taken down about, like, how, like, it's almost that time where I Like, start feeding to be sick again, where I'm like, ooh. Like, I love the attention I get when I'm sick.

Drew (9:51)

Sick. There's something wrong with you.

Enya (9:54)

No, we know, we know, we know. Me and my alters know.

Josiah (9:58)

Your voices both kind of sound like parallel universe versions of you.

Enya (10:02)

Yeah. I feel like I'm just going to.

Drew (10:04)

Be stuck like this forever.

Enya (10:05)

Yeah. The audio listeners are like, who the fuck are these people?

Drew (10:09)

We replaced ourselves because we were just tired of working. And, like, we're already starting that money hoarding idea. We're going to get someone to replace us who does all the work, and we're going to pay them maybe $2 an hour, period. So $2 an episode and average that out. We're paying them good. They're making eight bucks a month. That's good.

Josiah (10:25)

Yeah.

Enya (10:26)

But I was laying in bed and I said I had hypoxia. Why did I say I had hypoxia?

Drew (10:32)

He was like. Because, like, I. I just, like, haven't been getting enough oxygen to my brain because since I'm congested and had all those fumes, I'm like, trying to breathe through my nose and not breathing through my mouth, which is like, breathe through your.

Enya (10:42)

I will never be a mouth breather. Absolutely not. Oh, yeah. Break my three year mewing streak for what? Some oxygen from my blood? Like, no. Why do you think people been calling me sexy? It's because my hair is out of my face and they can see my jawline. Look at the comments on Josiah's new video. Every single one is about me being sexy. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. We'll insert them because I actually so happy you guys went through and screenshotted them because they made me feel so good about myself. I'm scared Drew actually looks good. As a straight woman, I'm so attracted to Drew, I'm going insane saying, Drew looks way too sexy in this video. Drew looks so good. I'm tired of y' all denying it. Like, the way Drew looks like a meal. Drew is really serving. Jesus. I can tell the Grinder Church app has been doing work. Yes, it has. Drew looks so good. What the. Drew looks so good in this vid. I was lowkey fantasizing. Oh, I was lowkey fantasizing. Drew looks like a Victorian prince. Drew looks good as hell.

Drew (11:48)

Okay, we get it.

Enya (11:49)

You don't understand how much I needed this after.

Drew (11:51)

See any comments about me? Was there?

Enya (11:53)

No, no. Look. And these are all just, like, straight up screenshots. Like, every single one of these, it's just back to back. It's just back to back. Like, people want me.

Drew (12:01)

People love him in your bed. Saying that he's suffering from hypoxia and.

Enya (12:06)

He'S throwing this away.

Drew (12:07)

And that's why I've been so grumpy. And he was like. And that's why I've been so grumpy the past few days.

Enya (12:12)

Well, no, like, I've been, like, hella dizzy. Like, literally so dizzy all day. And just, like, yesterday was not my day. I was a little grumpy boy. And, like, I just wasn't having it. But I'm also sick as a dog because I got that dog in me. Oh, you're so cringy, Drew, when you do things like that. Shut up. Shut the up.

Drew (12:37)

Well, yeah, he was like, well, because I. I don't breathe through my mouth, and I can't breathe through my nose, so I'm suffering from hypoxia. And I was like, what are we, like, breathe through your mouth? Also, you have been snoring since you're.

Enya (12:49)

Like, yeah, it's been bad. Josiah said it was worse than yours the other day when I, like, fell asleep on the couch.

Drew (12:54)

When we were both sleeping on the couch, you were fully snoring.

Enya (12:56)

Well, let me bring something up. That the first night when I slept in your bed, you did. What did I do? What did I do? No. So I always, like, wanted. Kyra, you okay? Yeah. Okay. Just making sure. I always, like, was curious about India's bedtime rituals just because, like, everyone has their little thing that they do. And, like, I was, like, all in. This is probably, like, brushing her hair, like, being, like, cute and just getting ready for bed. Putting on her lotions and her creams and just, like, doing her little thing, like, whatever that girls do. Taking out her tampon, like, period. Shit.

Drew (13:33)

Wait, how long do you think a menstrual cycle lasts?

Enya (13:37)

Like, apparently years for you, because you're a bitch all the time. PMSing much? No, they last for, like, a week. Like, a few days. Yeah, yeah, I know, because we were.

Drew (13:49)

Watching that video where it was like, the guys try to disguise themselves as girls. Like, and one of the guys was like, doesn't a menstrual cycle last 30 days? And I actually couldn't believe that because I was like, wait a second. Wait a second. Like, if you were like, there's no excuse to also be in your 20s and be a sexually active person. Like, that is where I draw the line. If you are a sexually active man and you still think that it's like, how many times have you interacted with a woman? She's like, yeah, I'm on my period. And if is she just like ghosting you for a month? And she's like, I'm not on my period anymore. Like, is that what's happening?

Enya (14:20)

Like, why do you play? He just doesn't get. Yeah, but anyways, we're like laying in bed, I'm kind of doing my thing. Like I'm. I have my laptop open playing a video and I'm watching Tick Tock on my phone. At one point you're like, in Drew, turn off your laptop. Like, turn the brightness down.

Drew (14:35)

It's cuz it was so bright. Cuz I was like kind of falling asleep and I turned my head and.

Enya (14:39)

It was just like, yeah, it's like a flashbang. And then so Inya's laying there, she's like slowly dozing off. And then I'm like, what the did Enya just fall asleep to? Like, what is she listening to? So I like, listen in. She's literally listening to like the most gruesome, like, diabolical, like, murder, like, podcast show that's like talking about like beheading women and like cutting their limbs off.

Drew (15:06)

I have not like watched something like that to fall asleep in a long time. And I swear on my mother's earn, yeah, I have not watched something like that to fall asleep for a long time. But I was so tired and I didn't have it in me to scroll through TikTok. And that was at the top of my timeline. And I was like, I've already watched all, like, if, you know Evan and Caitlyn, that's what I'll be watching. That's my vibe. But they haven't fucking uploaded. So I was like, damn, you're going to push me. And I, I was gonna watch a plane crash video, but I was like, let me not restart that journey.

Enya (15:33)

And you're always like, why am I so anxious? Like, why am I so scared of everything all the time? It's because you fall asleep to murder documentaries.

Drew (15:41)

Like, and it puts me to that.

Enya (15:43)

It really did. I've never seen you fall asleep so fast in my life.

Drew (15:46)

You know what it is? It's like, I think it's less about the content, but it's more about like the voice of the people who do that. They have such a specific octave. It's like Joe Pera. Like, it literally just puts me to sleep. That's my asmr.

Enya (16:00)

Yeah, we do have like nice voices.

Drew (16:02)

And why Are you changing your voice?

Enya (16:04)

I'm not. I think being congested, like, is legitimately the worst thing that can ever happen to me personally. Like, it. Like, I. I'm not even kidding. I will go on record saying this. I would rather be dead than be congested for a week. Like, I. I literally cannot exist in this form, like, this much.

Drew (16:29)

Yeah, I, like, we too much tried to start going back to the gym because we're not, like, sick anymore. We're just left over with some congestion. And I'm not kidding. The second I start running on that treadmill, I start choking on phlegm, and it is the nastiest thing ever, and it's so embarrassing.

Enya (16:45)

Tell the story. Tell the story about how competitive.

Drew (16:47)

Okay, okay.

Enya (16:48)

You always get on me for being competitive.

Drew (16:50)

Okay, I have to explain this, though. So we, me, Josiah, and Drew were at the gym, and, like, before they went off to do their, like, workouts, Drew got on my treadmill behind me, and we were walking together. And the lady behind us, Josie, saw her, and he was like. She just gave us the dirtiest look for doing that because it's, like, a bougie gym, and, like, everybody there takes themselves so fudgeing serious. And I guess I'm one of those people, too, because of what I ended up doing. But, like, Drew was behind me, and we were walking for a second, and he left. And now I was, like, stuck in the idea that this woman was watching me because she was right behind me on another treadmill. And so, like, I was, like, doing my, like, warm up. And then I started running, and I was like, oh, my God. I literally can't run because I'm so congested that I, like, can't intake enough air to keep going. And I was, like, overheating really fast since I couldn't intake air. But then as I'm running, I'm like, oh, my God, this lady behind me is going to see that I only ran for, like, two minutes and be like, this bitch is just here to play. Like, she's not even about it. So then I kept running and choking on my phone because I was like, I will not. I will not let her think I am here to fudgeing. Play around. Yeah, I'm about my business, bitch. I. But, yeah, I ran for, like, three extra minutes, and I'm not kidding. I almost fainted because I was getting no oxygen to my head. I basically embarrassed myself even more because I was so lightheaded from running with no oxygen that I had to, like, stop the treadmill and like, bend down because I almost fainted.

Enya (18:10)

I will say when I was walking with you, to get my heart rate up before my exercising, I do, like, a little inclined walk for five to ten minutes. When I, like, got on your treadmill and we started just, like, goofing off for those, like, five seconds. I could feel her energy, like, burning.

Drew (18:28)

Yeah. Burning holes through our back.

Enya (18:33)

You do not belong here.

Drew (18:34)

What did we do? We're just like, you're mad because we're.

Enya (18:37)

Young and you're boring.

Drew (18:38)

Yeah. And you're here alone and we're here with friends, so you're mad.

Enya (18:42)

But yeah.

Drew (18:43)

Oh, wait. I never even finished the Squid Games. The Swish Games thing.

Enya (18:46)

Oh, yeah.

Drew (18:47)

So it was asking questions, like, it was like, oh, how do you do in team situations? And my answer was, I fall back and I let everybody make a mistake so that I can't be blamed for the mistake. How do you do in confrontations? I said, I win. I've got a nasty temper. It was like, what do you. Why do you want to win the money? And I said, honestly, so I can just, like, never do anything ever again. I just kind of want to chill with my life. And then it was like, why do you want to be in Squid Game? It's like, so I could prove to everybody that I will win. It was like, why do you think you will win? It was like, because I will. I just know it. And just shit like that. And like, I'll insert the pictures that I, like, gave for myself because it was asking for, like a headshot, like a full body shot, like, all this shit. This is one of the pictures I gave.

Enya (19:37)

If they selected you and would you shave your head for the role?

Drew (19:40)

Yeah. What if they were like, do you actually look like that? Because we'll take you.

Enya (19:43)

Yeah.

Drew (19:44)

And then this is what I haven't showed Drew, but this is my Squid. My official Squid Games self tape. Hey, what's up? My name is Enya Humanity. I want to be on the next Squid game. Please choose me. I am five foot four, ready to have fun, and I will be winning. So maybe don't choose me because you're gonna have to give me $4.5 million.

Enya (20:10)

I fucking hate that voice mewing at.

Drew (20:15)

The end because I had to show that that I could serve too.

Enya (20:19)

You have to.

Drew (20:20)

So hopefully, guys, I will be shipped off to Squid Game soon and you won't see me for six to eight months.

Enya (20:26)

Yeah. Literally. Please, please, God. Well, Inya made that and I heard that they were having a little fun, so I decided to make my own. What would you. Or go ahead. My name is Drew Phillips, and I'm casting for the Squid Games. I'm the villain of the season. Oh, if I know.

Drew (20:51)

Yeah, I'm the villain of the season. We should just make a song and give it to them.

Enya (20:55)

Yo.

Drew (20:57)

But, yeah, they're copying my swag because they're like, oh, do you know anybody who signed up for it? And I said no, because obviously they don't want, like, alliances to be formed off, like, at first. Also, game shows are so funny like that. When they're like, there's alliances, it's like, no. You're literally stuck in a room with random people and you're just making friends. But people, like, start to get so psychologically torn apart and settings like that, that they see people making connections and they're like, what are they doing? Like, do we look like an alliance? They're forming an alliance. It's like, no, they're. Y' all are just making friends because you're gonna be here for, like, 15 days in a row.

Enya (21:32)

Should we put this picture up there or should I post this on Instagram?

Drew (21:34)

You should post that on the Grinder church app. Look at this one, Kai.

Enya (21:43)

Should I post this on ig? The way it would eat down.

Josiah (21:49)

God, dude, The one of Josiah is really naughty.

Drew (21:52)

I hate Josiah. Like, the way Josiah can take photos really is jarring to me.

Enya (21:58)

Yeah.

Drew (21:59)

But, yeah, so hopefully I'll be in.

Enya (22:02)

The next Squidge games.

Drew (22:03)

In the next Squid games, and I'll be winning.

Enya (22:05)

No, I was telling Anya. I was like, no. Like, if you and I went on together and, like, had our little Katniss and Peeta moment, like, where it was, like, between the two of us in the final and, like, you had to, like, stab me in the heart. But, like, we decided to, like, make love instead. Like, they would love.

Drew (22:23)

They didn't make love.

Enya (22:25)

They would like to say me painting.

Josiah (22:28)

My face, his mouth exposed.

Drew (22:31)

No.

Enya (22:32)

Like. Like, the whole thing is like, oh. Like, we would have to have sex on camera. So, like, I'm like, why would they not want that for us? Like, why would you know?

Drew (22:41)

How is no one in there?

Enya (22:42)

Like, oh, they are.

Drew (22:43)

Someone was.

Enya (22:44)

They are for sure. When it gets down, like, it's two and a half weeks in, they're banging, boning, bashing. They're gishing. They're gishing their bash. Like, let's talk about it.

Drew (22:53)

Yeah, I guess maybe they would let us go because they let that mom and son get in.

Enya (22:56)

Exactly.

Drew (22:57)

So they need another duo for the next season. It's gonna be us.

Enya (23:00)

Yeah. Like, imagine.

Drew (23:02)

The thing is, I have such a, like, big ego and like, no, you.

Enya (23:05)

Would stand so bad.

Drew (23:07)

Complex, actually. That's why. Because in my head, no, in my head, I wouldn't compete because I'd be like, this is so embarrassing that we're all competing and we want something so bad. Because I have, like, no self respect and I don't believe in fighting for what I want. That I know in my head. In my head I would think I wouldn't do it because I'd be like, ew. Like, I don't want people to know I really want something that's embarrassing. But then I think about how competitive I am in nature and I would be a fudgeing nightmare. I literally am so bad at competitions because I get so, like, intense for no reason. It's never that serious. But I need to win. Like, I need to win. And if I didn't win, let them explode. My little chest thing. I'm going to rip it out and, like, throw it at someone's head. Like, don't fudgeing. Pop that shit on my chest. Like, that's too much. And I'm not going to act like I'm dead because they had all those bitches falling on the floor like, they're dead if they pop my shit.

Enya (23:58)

I'd be like, that was too far. Like, making their squidge expl. Or squib explode and then like, them having to fake death. $5 million. Like, it's OD. Like, it's crazy.

Drew (24:11)

Some of them were really giving, like, a fake death performance. Like, they were like, I'm going to get this Emmy. Like, I'm going to get this Emmy. Like, some of them were literally, like.

Enya (24:20)

Maybe they'll give me money.

Drew (24:21)

Like, so dramatic.

Josiah (24:22)

Just say, I'm. I'm just so proud of you guys. Because just then the mic was, like, pointed away and. Yeah, like, over here. And you, like, intuitively, like, professional podcaster vibes, like, knocked it towards your mouth.

Enya (24:36)

Wow. Yeah, I'm just on one.

Josiah (24:38)

I was about to have to, like, go engineer mode and be like, oh, like, can you turn them on?

Drew (24:42)

I just did a bunch of coke this morning, so I'm really, like, fine tuned today.

Josiah (24:45)

Oh, wow.

Drew (24:46)

Okay. I've been on, like, a coke concerning.

Enya (24:48)

But yeah, it's been really scary. She's on like a bender. She wakes up at noon. She wakes up at noon, everyone. Like, it's really scary.

Drew (24:57)

I literally cannot wake up early. It did. Every time it hits this time of year, Waking up before 11am is the.

Enya (25:04)

Hardest task, which is so surprising cuz the sun comes out earlier to greet.

Drew (25:08)

You inside, I think because I'm just cold and comfy and I'm like, oh, I just want to sleep. Like I slept for 10 hours last night.

Enya (25:14)

That's so crazy.

Drew (25:16)

And I kept sleeping. I'm crazy.

Enya (25:21)

Well, I'm thinking about getting veneers again.

Drew (25:24)

Are you going to get your teeth shaved down?

Enya (25:27)

I would be so disgusted with big, nasty gum teeth. Like, I want big nasty bright white. Like, like horse teeth. Like, I want them to be like.

Drew (25:38)

Veneers were the biggest scam. Like, that's when like the beauty industry got men and women at the same time. Like, actually veneers are beautiful for that. Because I feel like usually beauty standards just fall on women and like, women are having to go under the knife and shit. But they were like, you know what? Both genders will fudge with big teeth.

Enya (25:56)

Yeah, big, big teeth. No, like, I think veneers, when they're done right, are actually like really nice and cool. But like, if you already have nice teeth and you're getting veneers, like, it is a stab in the heart. Like, it's crazy.

Drew (26:13)

It was a smile.

Enya (26:14)

Yeah.

Josiah (26:15)

I can't stop imagining you with like huge cartoon teeth, dude.

Drew (26:20)

The thing about veneers is even when they're good though, like, that first week is really jarring. That first week of like, new mouse acclimating. Yeah. Like, I have to reacclimate my eyes to the fact that, like, I know what your teeth looked like. Like, it's like a key component to your face. And now they're just big.

Enya (26:35)

Yeah. And we're strictly talking cosmetic. We're strictly, like, if you need fake teeth, do your thing. Like, respect.

Drew (26:45)

But I mean, the who, like, they're like, oh, I wish my teeth were whiter.

Enya (26:48)

And it's like, like why no one has white teeth.

Drew (26:52)

Yeah, it looks so weird. Like, you look like you threw the Paris filter over your face permanently.

Enya (26:57)

But I am getting veneers.

Drew (27:00)

Soon you're gonna go to turkey, get your hair.

Enya (27:03)

I'm gonna get a hairline and veneers. Also, the people that reached out to me for hairline surgery very early into the podcast, they were like, we'll fly you and a buddy up to get two free hairline surgeries. I was offended then, but now I want it because it would be so funny, like, if I like, literally got like a crazy.

Drew (27:23)

You should get your hairline, like literally right here and have like, no forehead.

Enya (27:27)

I just want the picture of my face like really big and swollen so bad.

Drew (27:31)

I could just beat you the up.

Enya (27:34)

Hi. You're giggly today.

Josiah (27:36)

Yeah, dude.

Drew (27:37)

Because Kai hit a dab break before we started. Yeah, he's up.

Enya (27:40)

He's about to be Cat.

Josiah (27:41)

Was I not supposed to hit that?

Drew (27:43)

No, dude.

Josiah (27:44)

I was gonna say I. I peed before the podC. Put the seat down and yeah, he's.

Enya (27:51)

He's saying he did a good thing. You're just so unrespecting.

Josiah (27:56)

Like, just like waiting on my. Thank you for that.

Drew (27:58)

Why would I say thank you for that?

Josiah (28:00)

Cuz it's. It was super nice.

Enya (28:03)

You would have fallen. Your petite body would have fallen into.

Drew (28:05)

Sometimes I'm so. Yeah, I know. I would have been flushed away cuz I'm so small. I would have just like slid under.

Enya (28:11)

The door like a piece of paper.

Drew (28:14)

We were at Orion's exhibit and I like, was like, oh my God. I literally have to shit. I'm going back there to shit. And I didn't even tell Drew that. Who told you that?

Enya (28:21)

Sabrina.

Drew (28:22)

Oh. Because I was like, all right, bye. I'm going to go shit. And I went and grabbed my phone and went to the back and I was like on the toilet and I just hear like. And like someone's wiggling the door handle. Which I immediately knew it was Drew because like, who the fuck has the urgency at this exhibit? Like, it's all respectable adults here other than like Orion's three rowdy ass friends and someone's like jiggling that. Don't do the voice you did.

Enya (28:43)

There's a fire.

Ryan Seacrest (28:45)

Run.

Enya (28:45)

There's a fire.

Drew (28:47)

Get the out. Get out.

Enya (28:48)

There's a fucking fire. And then I started blowing smoke under the door. I found Inya's vape and I just.

Drew (28:54)

Started walking on like the seat with my like purse.

Enya (28:57)

Yeah. So I was like, like blowing smoke under the door. It was such a vibe.

Drew (29:02)

We're evacuating. We're evacuating.

Enya (29:04)

We're evacuating.

Drew (29:05)

Get the fuck out.

Enya (29:07)

I just like harmonized with myself three different layers. Oh, there's like three voice. No, whatever. But what were you saying about whatever? His nuts is what the was Einstein?

Drew (29:20)

Is that real? Like him sticking his tongue out? Why was he doing that? He was silly. We can't take her anywhere. Literally.

Enya (29:28)

Bag of chips on his head. Like he's crazy.

Drew (29:31)

We need to edit that. It's like my girl's crazy. We can't take her anywhere. Why did he do that? Is that real?

Enya (29:39)

Having a fun time. Yeah. That was like three days before he died.

Drew (29:43)

Really?

Enya (29:44)

No.

Drew (29:44)

Wait, what did he die from?

Enya (29:45)

I think old age. Nah, See, he's goofy, but that one is crazy. That's not real. Is that one real?

Drew (29:55)

No. Oh, yeah, it is.

Enya (29:59)

See, he was just with the shits. Like, he was down for the vibe. He was just crazy. A mathematician that like mathematicians can let loose and have fun sometimes.

Drew (30:06)

Do you think he likes banged hard or was he like mid?

Enya (30:10)

I'm not going there with you.

Drew (30:12)

Okay. I just feel like he probably like.

Enya (30:15)

Put down Einstein lays Pipe.

Drew (30:18)

I feel like Einstein laid it down like crazy boobs.

Enya (30:22)

Yeah, nerds do.

Josiah (30:23)

Yeah, he hit the back walls for sure.

Enya (30:25)

Oh, my God. Wait. Okay, I just deleted all my notes.

Drew (30:30)

You say that every episode.

Enya (30:32)

We're good.

Drew (30:32)

Like, you don't know how to navigate your iPhone. Every episode you're like, oh, my God. Oh my God. Two years of work down the drain. Oh, my God.

Enya (30:38)

Literally, this, the new update is like too much. Like, you're literally going too far. Like, I wish I had my old phone with my old ass update. Just like, it's like, also this phone doesn't fit in my hand. So like, I'll like be on the tick tock feed and like, oh, yeah, your hand will touch the pad of my hand will like touch the refresh button and I'll just like lose the video that I was intently watching. And I'm just like, okay, this, this. I was researching like Christian mega churches. Specifically, like Texas Christian mega churches. And I don't know if y' all have ever been to a megachurch, but it's kind of like a rite of passage, like in the. In like south tech. Like in the Bible. Yeah, Bible belt. Like, is to like experience that as a church person. And like, really, it is crazy. Like, it. It's disgusting. Literally disgusting. Because, like one, they're like arenas, like in some of these churches, like 35. No, literally, like 30, 000 people, like capacity for these like church events. And two, like, some of them, like, specifically the Christian. I mean, the Christmas, like shows that they put on, like, literally have stage design comparable to like Beyonce's Renaissance tour. Like, it's the craziest. Like, I'm not exaggerating. I feel like every single night they have like a 200,000, $250,000 budget and they do these Christmas shows for like.

Drew (32:17)

Do churches get their money from their, like, people who come?

Enya (32:20)

Yeah, like a lot of it is, but it's also like all tax free. But I found a Video that I want us to all watch together. So, Kai, come over here of like the mega church. And I'm pretty sure this is in Plano. It's ridiculous. This. This is all the same show. Like, what I'm about to show you all happened at the same show. So first a horse and a carriage. Like some really dark Satanist.

Drew (33:05)

What the.

Enya (33:11)

People flying around.

Josiah (33:12)

It's like the Drake concert.

Enya (33:14)

Yeah, more stage design than Drake's concert. Camels in Texas. Texas. Like, okay. It's like the pink concert with them flipping around and zebras. Drummer boy. Like, this is crazy. Beyonce flying over us at the Renaissance tour. But yeah.

Drew (33:57)

Wait, what the does any of that have to do with God?

Enya (34:00)

It's all one. That was all one show.

Drew (34:02)

Wait, I thought, like, hardcore Christians didn't.

Enya (34:04)

Believe in Santa because Christmas is a pagan holiday. Like, it literally is a pagan holiday. But like, like they just know they can make more money doing that, but.

Josiah (34:15)

Cost like a million dollars.

Enya (34:16)

Yeah, and they do it all the time. And they do regular shows where the sermon like, or where the preacher's just flying around. Like every single show they like fly in.

Josiah (34:26)

That shit must have been like three times the amount of a Beyonce concert.

Enya (34:30)

Yeah, like, it's. It's unchill.

Drew (34:32)

How are they homophobic? But they're so theatric.

Enya (34:36)

Every person I went to church with, that was a very homophobic person. I have seen on Grindr. I have seen you. I know. I see the type of person the church app.

Drew (34:45)

So of course they're on there.

Enya (34:46)

Yeah.

Josiah (34:47)

The guy that's doing cartwheels.

Drew (34:50)

Yeah, that's what I'm saying is like, they're literally so theatric. And it's like, so it literally reminds me of that video of the drag queens, like circling like at that event recently when they like, fell. I hope they were okay. I never like, looked at that up, but like, sick. I. I like don't understand. Like, it is so theatric. It is so Broadway. So I'm like, like. And then they do all that and then they're like, okay, but like low key gay people, poor people. We hate you.

Enya (35:17)

No, period. No, in my hometown, the. There's like this non denominational church that like, for a very long time was like the church to go to. It was. It's like very.

Drew (35:30)

It was like 11 in Miami.

Enya (35:32)

Yeah, exactly. It was like the club. No, it actually was super high tech, but like in like a modest way. And it was non denominational and like their motto was like, no perfect people allowed. So like no matter what walk of life you come from, like, whatever sexuality you are, like, whatever the vibe is, like, you're welcome in this church and loved and accepted. And for a very long time, I was like, hell, yeah. Like, swag. But the new pastor, preacher, whatever the hell is, biggest op of all time. He's definitely a closeted gay man. Because, like, randomly, in every single sermon, he'll just sneak in, like, like, anti gay rhetoric. He'll just say, like, the. The one that happened recently that caused, like, a really big stir in my community. And, like, he actually had to publicly apologize because, like, this church is a good church. Like, I really, like, if I, like, lived in Granbury and wanted to attend church regularly, I would go to this church. Like, it's. It's a great place. But just, like, sometimes he'll just like, get on his high horse and start talking about, like, gay. And I'm like, bro, like, what are you on about? Like, recently was, what does this have.

Drew (36:42)

To do with, like, me losing faith because my mother is sick?

Enya (36:45)

Exactly. Like, it's so bizarre. And like, he'll, like, the. The one that caused the controversy was he was like, just giving this sermon, and all of a sudden he started doing, like, a standup bit about, like, his son, like, how his son is, like, star quarterback. And he was like, yeah, like, my son, like, would never be gay. Because, like, you know, they say this, like, there's research studies about wrestling with your kid. Like, it'll stop him from being gay. So, like, I'll just grab him, wrestling him, because my son will never be gay. And everyone was like, pause, oh. And we were all like, oh, no, you, like, are weird.

Drew (37:21)

You're weird. It's really odd.

Enya (37:23)

It's weird behavior. And he. There's like two sermons every Sunday. There's an early morning and an afternoon. And he did. He set up the bit and did the bit the exact same way both times. So. Because it was like, super planned and, like, he both got laughs. But then, like, Facebook destroyed him. It had like, like a thousand comments on our small little hometown's, like, Facebook page. And everyone was like, yeah, it's weird. They lost if he doesn't stop, like, being homophobic, like, we're gonna stop going to this church. And, like, whatever. But it's almost apologize.

Drew (37:52)

You can be gay and have faith in God. It doesn't have to be like that. Oh, my God. Wow. But, like, I. I feel like just priests and like, pastors and everybody, like, they. They just get so, like, tapped into their ego of It. And then they're like, I can expand. I can become. They start to feel like an enter trainer. They're like.

Enya (38:13)

They're the false eyes.

Drew (38:14)

I can move the crowd. Like, I could make them laugh. I can make them cry. Like, I could do anything.

Enya (38:18)

Yeah, they're all false idols. Like, if you don't worship anything but your God. False idol. Except for me, because I am God to a lot of people, surprisingly.

Drew (38:28)

Have you ever just thought to, like, I don't know, take into account that you just might be a compulsive liar?

Enya (38:34)

Yeah, and I am. I am.

Drew (38:37)

I thought you were gonna, like, deny that. Like, like.

Enya (38:39)

No, I am a compulsive liar. It's fun.

Drew (38:42)

But doesn't that, like, go, like, if. If people believe that you're, like, their God? Like, I don't think people want to, like, have a God that's, like, a compulsive.

Enya (38:50)

Well, if they believe I'm their God, then, like, what's the problem?

Drew (38:53)

No, I guess. Yeah, you could do whatever you want. Yeah, but do they get to do whatever they want?

Enya (38:58)

No.

Drew (38:59)

Okay.

Enya (39:00)

I'm just, like, lying is fun, and whoever I hurt in my way, like, deserves to be hurt. What the. Randomly, like, randomly random as.

Drew (39:14)

But if you fall for my lie, you deserve it. Like.

Enya (39:16)

And scene.

Drew (39:24)

Okay.

Enya (39:25)

The hum of the refrigerator is, like, classic right now. Like, it sounds so good. Like, I'm not even kidding. Like, being up late, like, when you're not supposed to, like, in the kitchen, like, making a mustard sandwich and, like, mustard and cheese sandwich. Y' all never did that?

Josiah (39:41)

No.

Enya (39:42)

And then you hear, like, you're being.

Drew (39:43)

Quiet and, like, were you, like, raised in the 1920s? Like, why is that your sandwich of choice?

Enya (39:50)

In an ingredients house, we had to, like, fin for. If you wanted food, you had to cook it. Hell, no, I couldn't. I. Like, there was a time when my family caught up that, like. But there were times when me and my sister would be, like, so hungry that we would eat raw pasta and chocolate chips.

Drew (40:10)

Like, I tried to think of it. I would always, like, eat, like, I'd on some, like, cup noodles. Like, we always had cup noodles in the crib, so that was, like, my.

Enya (40:17)

But you had to cook that? Yeah. You ever eat them wrong?

Drew (40:21)

And I'd put cheese in it.

Enya (40:22)

Yeah. Oh, classic. Certified. Yeah.

Drew (40:25)

I would do cheese, onions, green peppers, and then cheese.

Enya (40:29)

How I would do mine is I would cook the noodles on the stove till they are, like, literally so squidgy and soft that, like, they have no bite to the noodles left. I would drain all of the water out, literally all of it. Then I would put a chicken bouillon cube and the sauce packet and then.

Drew (40:48)

Okay, so you give yourself sodium overload.

Enya (40:50)

Yeah, exactly. And then I'd put a slice of cheese or two if I was feeling crazy, and I'd mix it up and I would make this like gelatinous, like glob of salt and like nasty chicken flavor. And I would just eat that down. But like, when I was like, really young and I didn't know how to use the microwave yet, like, and I was really scared of the microwave for a long time because I put like a fork in there and I made like plasma and like, it literally almost burned the house down. I would just take the ramen uncooked out of the bag and pour the flavor packet, the powder flavor packet on it and just eat it like chips.

Josiah (41:25)

Like so good.

Enya (41:27)

That was the move.

Josiah (41:28)

Cuz it was in between pasta where it wasn't like quite as harsh.

Enya (41:32)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josiah (41:33)

You could still chew it.

Drew (41:34)

Yeah, it was powderized pasta.

Enya (41:36)

Yeah, yeah, it was crazy. But the top ramen arc was like, lit.

Drew (41:40)

My little sister would always, always, without fail, if we let her cook her cup noodles alone, she would always almost start a fire. Like, I'm not kidding. I can remember eight different occasions where we'd be sitting in the living room and we'd be like, like, what's that smell? What's happening? And we go into the kitchen and she's like opening the microwave and she's like. And she would always forget her fork in her plate that she made of leftovers.

Enya (42:08)

And always almost that sound, dude, someone.

Drew (42:12)

Needs to put their iPhone in a microwave, the new iPhone, and see what happens.

Enya (42:15)

Literally, like there was a whole YouTube channel that would put in microwaves that was like mine and my buddies, like, for a while before I started dissecting live animals to see their heart beating. But what my favorite genre of video right now is, like, not my favorite genre. It's top 10 genre all time. I'll leave it there. But is like people like cooking pizzas in the oven and forgetting about them for 24 hours and then just being like a solid massive charcoal or like cooking their ramen or heating something up in the microwave and forgetting about it. And it went on for 10 minutes and it's just like, like this black lump of burnt food. Like those videos will always, always, always get me. And like it will be like a pepperoni pizza and you can see like the black pepperonis on the black pizza. Like it's certified classic. Or, like, they'll, like, be cooking a turkey and, like, they'll pick up the bone and it'll turn to powder. Like, that shit's so lit.

Drew (43:18)

I love, like, really old people who don't really know what's, like, visually appetizing or visually appealing to young people who are just posting TikToks. And then it's like, like the most jarring scene ever. Like, from a young person's view, it is the most off putting, like, ominous video. And from their perspective, they were like, this is cute. This is just what I'm eating today. Like, it's just what I'm up to. And it's like something about it is, like, the colors, the sounds. Like the video itself feels like I gave AI a really ominous text and told it to make a video, but it's just this old person existing that's.

Enya (43:50)

Like all of, like, the. The kids I grew up with are all, like, simultaneously, like, mid-20s, like, starting to get into, like, cooking their own meals. And they are so proud of themselves, and they, like, love the food they cook. And I'm sure it tastes great, but, like, y' all gotta work on your plating for real and like.

Drew (44:11)

Like, work on the presentation.

Enya (44:13)

Yes. Literally. Because if you're gonna post it online, I'm going to judge the out of you. If it's ugly, like, make it look good. Like, I know it's just serving a purpose and it probably tastes good, but, like. Like, I'm not looking at your nasty plate of brown pasta. Like, it does not look good. Like, I don't. I'm not eating it, so I can't tell.

Drew (44:31)

But you're talking about Mason posting his pasta on his paper plate with his.

Enya (44:37)

His, like, vinegar.

Drew (44:38)

But he always says it's chocolate sauce, and it always looks like chocolate sauce. That's who we're talking about. Yeah, we're calling Mason out.

Enya (44:45)

Speed is on a tour right now of him just live streaming. I don't even know if he addresses, like, like, the audience, but he just, like, sets his computer up on stage in front of, like, 5, 000 kids and just live streams, and then that's it. I think I could be wrong, but honestly, goated. Like, that is so crazy.

Drew (45:05)

It's like, it feels like it would be like, an art.

Enya (45:08)

Exactly.

Drew (45:10)

That belongs in the MoMA.

Enya (45:11)

That's literally what I'm saying. Like, it's. It's honestly, like, it says a lot without saying much.

Drew (45:18)

Well, Drew didn't realize he left a snail trail in My bed, so I have to wash my sheets. It's really annoying.

Enya (45:23)

Okay?

Drew (45:23)

And, like, that's why I woke up as I rolled over into something squidgy. And it was from Drew. Do you have a psyop corner or what? Like, are you gonna entertain us?

Enya (45:33)

Oh, wow. So all I am is a Drew psyop corner and a Drew's brain floss.

Drew (45:37)

No, we don't need the brain floss.

Enya (45:39)

Yeah, that's all I am is Drew's brain floss to you guys. Wow.

Drew (45:46)

Okay.

Enya (45:47)

Yeah, I have a few. Imagine you come out of your teeth transplant surgery saying, harry, I'm out. I made it out alive. Then Harry hovers over the top of you and says, who you think gave you the teeth, love? And it's Harry Styles with no teeth. Who you think gave you the teeth, love? My name's Harry Styles, and I gave you the teeth, love.

Drew (46:17)

Have you seen the picture? Wait, show guy.

Enya (46:20)

I just sent it to you. Kai, who you think gave you the teeth? O. My name's average D and I talk about sex and bagging and shagging women who you think gave you the T flow. Like, who made that a genius in the hashtag Imagine classic. Okay. Be on their phone 24 7, then act surprised when they see 3. 33, 444, 111 them angel numbers not talking to you, babe. Go the outside. You're just on your phone too much.

Drew (47:02)

That's literally you.

Enya (47:04)

Yeah, literally. Girls with no car always getting the most drama. How the you even get there, dude?

Drew (47:11)

You know what's crazy, Drew? Is I was about to look that.

Enya (47:14)

One up because that one's so funny.

Drew (47:18)

That's me to you. Yeah, literally from 20. Like, 18 to 2023.

Enya (47:22)

It's hard to. That one is good in its own right, but it's hard to follow who you think gave you the teeth, love. This one is a certified Drew classic. I came up with this one all on my own. Imagine your card declines at therapy, and they just start telling you the truth that you are the problem.

Josiah (47:47)

No, don't leave. Come back.

Enya (47:58)

I thought I didn't come up with that one.

Drew (48:03)

Do another one. Do another one.

Enya (48:04)

That's all I got.

Drew (48:05)

What?

Enya (48:06)

Yeah, I know.

Drew (48:07)

You're slacking.

Enya (48:08)

Slim pickings. Like, people aren't posting funny in them anymore. Like, y' all need to get with it or. No, I'm just not getting, like, compilations on Tick tock.

Drew (48:20)

Let me not forget my makeup.

Enya (48:22)

Just post that picture right now. Screenshot that, and send it. So hard to go through my meme account. That, like, I. It's just difficult. Like, I can't even explain it, bro. Like, it's just hard. My job is so hard. I heart weed. I heart rough sex. I heart freaks. I heart head, period. Okay. Oh, this is a good one. Look at my lawyer, dog. I'm going to jail.

Drew (48:58)

Yeah, yours. Your original was crazy. All right, should we do some media?

Enya (49:06)

My media of the week is Blue Face falling off stage.

Drew (49:18)

Has to be edited, man.

Josiah (49:19)

It is, of course, but what's crazy is, like, they edited a reverb on the fart.

Enya (49:25)

Yeah, yeah.

Josiah (49:26)

Like, they wanted the fart to feel.

Enya (49:28)

Like it's, like, in the room with us. Is the fart in the room with us?

Josiah (49:32)

I think that's one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

Enya (49:34)

Yeah, we'll insert that so y' all can clock that T, too.

Drew (49:38)

You don't have to be a star to be in my show by Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr. California, the live version by Joni Mitchell.

Enya (49:46)

And.

Drew (49:49)

I've been listening to. What's it called? What is this song called? Everybody by Nicki Minaj. Duh. Like, who isn't listening to that? And I've been listening to Strike Holster by Lil Yachty a lot.

Enya (50:02)

I wanna strike, strike, strike, strike. I wanna straight. Hey, hey.

Drew (50:09)

Oh, my God.

Enya (50:11)

Let's do my Discover Weekly for, like, a surprise and see, like, what we get into.

Drew (50:16)

My Discover Weekly was trying me. They keep trying to feed me new songs since all the songs I was listening to are from the 70s.

Enya (50:25)

Kindo subsided. Okay. Really ambient. All right, we got Fall Ozian. Let's check to see when this was made, because it sounds good.

Drew (50:58)

It's made yesterday by me.

Enya (51:01)

How do you see when it was made? Oh, I'm gonna go to their profile.

Drew (51:04)

You go to the album, and then you can scroll down.

Enya (51:06)

Oh, 1993. And it has literally no listeners. I put y' all onto something crazy. Well, they have just put you on. They got two songs. I just put y' all the on. Because this shot, they got porcelain too. This is one of my favorites right now.

Drew (51:24)

Shoegaze.

Enya (51:26)

Yeah. No. Thank me later. O, Z, E, A N. Thank you, Drew, for putting us on.

Drew (51:32)

Remember when all I would listen to was shoegaze and I was like, why do I want to kill myself? Why? Why?

Enya (51:38)

You can't understand literally what the Are the cocktail twins saying? Like, what are they saying?

Drew (51:42)

They're saying, if you listen, they're saying. I don't know what they're.

Enya (51:45)

Y' all not y' all really aren't listening. You're not hearing them. All right, then. Song for New York, New Jersey. We praise the 999 Heart Takes Stable eye, man. Not feeling it, but respect. Odo Benson. Apogamy.

Drew (52:08)

Are we going through your whole Discover Weekly right now?

Enya (52:10)

Oh, this is.

Drew (52:11)

I have to so bad. So we need to wrap this up. Yeah, that was made yesterday.

Enya (52:17)

If this was in my headphone, it would probably be like circling my head. Like a 4D audio like haircut. Oh, they brought a melody in. They lost me. Apogamy. Odo Benson. All right, I'm going to do one more. I'm going to do one more. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. This is insane.

Josiah (52:39)

Reading your discovery.

Drew (52:41)

We're going to get this whole video demonetized.

Enya (52:44)

Oh, I love Spirit of the Beehive. Fell asleep with a vision.

Drew (52:55)

Her.

Enya (52:59)

But.

Drew (52:59)

I don't song I like love but makes me so sad. But I'll always, always listen to it is. But actually it makes me sad and happy. We'll live through the long, long days.

Enya (53:10)

Oh, is it Drive my Car?

Drew (53:12)

Yeah. And I don't know the whole and the through. It's like Spotify moves too slow and through the long nights. I was just having Ishibashi that. But it has to be the one. The. The song. Because he does like, in that album, there's like three renditions of each song. So, like, it's like the same title, but there's like three different renditions for each one. But you have to listen to one that's three minutes and 55 seconds. That one of that title was like, so good. It makes me so happy, but also like, so sad. But it like, literally, if the world was ending, I would want to hear that one because I would be like, wow, my life was amazing.

Enya (53:53)

Oh, that's pretty. One last album. It is a Spirit of the Beehive album. It's entertainment, comma, death. It's scary. But I love this. I love this. And it was. And it's a modern album. 2021.

Drew (54:11)

Wow.

Enya (54:12)

Did we watch any movies?

Drew (54:13)

No.

Enya (54:14)

Any shows?

Drew (54:15)

No, we've been too busy. We haven't been watching anything. We've been watching the Cut and Beta Squad.

Enya (54:21)

I want to watch Salt Bay, so.

Drew (54:23)

And Poor things. Yeah, maybe we do that tonight. Did I. Oh, I think I have a. I have a class to go to tonight.

Enya (54:30)

I need to watch Salt Bay with Jacob Elordi and Poor Things with Emma Stoner. One thing about me is I love Emma Stone, period.

Josiah (54:42)

Yeah, she's awesome.

Enya (54:43)

But okay. Oh, that's the episode. Oh, no, I was. I was just.

Drew (54:48)

Oh. I didn't sign up for anything.

Enya (54:49)

Okay. Like, what are you talking about?

Josiah (54:52)

She is.

Drew (54:52)

All right, well, I'm gonna go. Thank you guys so much for listening. You're awesome.

Ryan Seacrest (55:26)

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