We're Gonna Collab With Mr. Beast

Summary

Emergency Intercom Podcast Summary: "We're Gonna Collab With Mr. Beast"

Release Date: July 15, 2022
Hosts: Enya Umanzor (Kai) and Drew Phillips
Produced by: iHeartPodcasts

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1. Opening Banter and Personal Anecdotes (00:25 - 02:04)

The episode kicks off with Drew and Kai engaging in playful banter about upcoming voice notes and the imminent arrival of Josh. Drew welcomes listeners with enthusiasm, stating, "Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom, ladies and gentlemen. Boy, do we have an episode for you" (00:49). Kai suggests a more relaxed tone for the episode, revealing that the hosts recently experienced what they humorously call "the most stressful, stressful, stressful two weeks of our life" (00:57).

They delve into a minor argument they had, which swiftly resolved over casual antics like Drew unintentionally displaying his "butt crack on camera" (01:21). The duo emphasizes their ability to turn a "bad day into the best day," culminating in a humorous recount of their reconciliation at Buffalo Wild Wings (01:30).

2. Merchandise Updates and Fan Interactions (04:05 - 06:06)

Transitioning from personal stories, Drew and Kai address their fanbase with gratitude for the support and merchandise sales. Drew humorously informs listeners about delays due to overwhelming demand: "but too many of you bitches decided to join in, so there will be a delay fast" (04:21). Kai adds a comedic twist by suggesting their merch doubles as tampons, poking fun at supply shortages (05:02).

They acknowledge the challenges of meeting high demand while maintaining quality, with Kai expressing uncertainty about their merchandising decisions: "We'll see if we made the right decision" (05:39). The hosts also extend thanks for reaching their one-year anniversary, reflecting on their journey and the importance of the podcast to their lives (06:06).

3. Humor Styles and Comedy Preferences (07:19 - 09:11)

Kai and Drew explore different facets of comedy, contrasting low-brow humor like fart jokes with more sophisticated stand-up routines. Kai passionately defends crude humor, claiming, "Dick balls and farts will always be funny" (07:19). Drew concurs, appreciating the simplicity and innate humor in such jokes, while also contemplating the idea of touring with their unique comedic style (07:40).

Kai shares a light-hearted story about finding sentimental items in a chair, blending nostalgia with humor: "I see a bunch of comments of people all the time being like, he's so real for this. Like, he's so real" (08:42). This segment underscores their ability to find humor in everyday experiences and personal artifacts.

4. Managing the Discord Community (14:00 - 19:01)

A significant portion of the discussion centers on their Discord server's rapid growth and the ensuing challenges. Kai reminisces about the server's early days, highlighting the surge in members and the subsequent chaos: "We were like, literally game planning... we were like, it's all over" (18:42). The hosts express concerns about maintaining control and the psychological toll of managing an evolving online community.

Drew elaborates on the complexities of online interactions, noting how Discord can mirror societal structures but also lead to negative dynamics: "Discord is one of the last places where you get to see how society came to be" (15:38). This reflection serves as both a critique and an acknowledgment of the platform's impact on their community-building efforts.

5. Health, Mental Health, and Personal Struggles (13:09 - 15:34)

Kai opens up about his fear of medical diagnoses, candidly admitting that he avoids doctors out of fear of receiving dire news: "I don't go to the doctor because I'm scared they're going to tell me that I'm just a psychopath and it's not real" (13:39). This vulnerability is juxtaposed with the group's humorous takes on mental health diagnoses, like joking about "Big Pussy Disorder" as a play on BPD (14:00).

Josiah shares his own experiences with misdiagnosis, further emphasizing the hosts' struggles with mental health and the stigma surrounding it. This segment blends serious introspection with their characteristic humor, providing listeners with a glimpse into the hosts' personal challenges.

6. Self-Deprecating Humor and Physical Attributes (30:00 - 35:11)

The conversation shifts to self-deprecating jokes about physical appearances, particularly focusing on feet and height. Drew and Kai tease each other about their shoe sizes and foot aesthetics, leading to lighthearted ribbing: "Kai is, like, impossible to read. I don't think he likes them" (29:16). This playful exchange highlights their comfort with teasing and their ability to laugh at themselves.

Kai shares a story about his personal trainer criticizing his muscle development, leading to a mix of embarrassment and humor: "You have delts of a baby" (32:03). This anecdote underscores the hosts' willingness to discuss insecurities in a humorous context, making their interactions relatable and entertaining.

7. Gaming, Virtual Realities, and Escapism (36:00 - 40:51)

Kai and Drew delve into discussions about gaming and its influence on their perception of reality. They humorously ponder the idea of bringing games like Fortnite into real life, balancing the allure of virtual escapism with the absurdity of such concepts: "We could just take the podcast with us and we'll film with you in bed" (31:38).

Drew narrates a vivid experience from Fortnite, illustrating his conflicted feelings about violence in gaming: "I took out my gun to shoot them, and I, like, like, killed them" (38:24). This segment explores the blurred lines between virtual actions and their emotional impact, all delivered with the hosts' signature comedic flair.

8. Social Media, Gossip, and Personal Sharing (22:33 - 28:35)

The hosts discuss the dynamics of gossip and the importance of maintaining trust within friendships. Kai emphasizes the fine line between sharing information and betraying confidences: "I have so many secrets from, like, so many people I love" (27:14). Drew echoes this sentiment, acknowledging his inability to lie effectively, which complicates his ability to keep certain secrets (27:28).

This conversation highlights their values around honesty and the challenges of navigating personal information in the age of social media.

9. Collaboration with Mr. Beast and Future Plans (44:10 - 48:58)

A significant theme of the episode is the hosts' aspiration to collaborate with YouTube sensation Mr. Beast. Drew expresses eagerness to participate in one of Mr. Beast's videos, inspiring a back-and-forth brainstorming session: "We need to be in a Mr. Beast video" (44:12). They craft imaginative and humorous ideas for potential collaborations, such as renting a $1 billion airplane for a month-long challenge or living entirely on the first-class section of a plane.

To solidify their plans, Drew shares a Cameo message from Nikki Blonsky, further invigorating their enthusiasm: "This is the most delicious thing I've ever eaten in my life" (46:33). The segment encapsulates their ambition and creative approach to content creation, blending aspirations with their humorous outlook.

10. Flirtatious Banter and Light-Hearted Ending (50:00 - 60:32)

The episode concludes with playful and flirtatious exchanges among the hosts, particularly focusing on comments about physical appearances and personal attributes. Drew shares an amusing anecdote about receiving a comment on his feet, leading to self-deprecating humor and teasing: "You're not getting, you're not getting a response. Maybe ever" (41:11).

Kai and Drew continue their light-hearted banter, touching on topics like Spotify subscriptions and music preferences, before wrapping up with final jokes and coordinated endings. Their camaraderie and comfortable rapport provide a satisfying closure to the episode, leaving listeners entertained and engaged.

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Notable Quotes:

• Kai on Authenticity: "I just see a bunch of comments of people all the time being like, he's so real for this. Like, he's so real. Like, he's so mean. I'm like, bitch, I am a lie." (03:11)

• Drew on Friendship Dynamics: "If you were keeping it real, you would do that. But you're fake as." (02:41)

• Kai on Comedy Preferences: "Dick balls and farts will always be funny. It is top tier humor and you cannot convince it otherwise." (07:19)

• Drew on Merchandise Delays: "But when you do get your. You can cut it up, you can roll it up and pop it in there." (05:05)

• Kai on Physical Appearance: "I have delts of a baby. And I was like, I'm a 24 year old. I'm a 16 year old man and you're telling me I have baby?" (32:03)

• Drew on Gaming Ethics: "Something about it felt really wrong. Like, I literally, like, the deep, deep, really human part of my, like, caveman brain was like, you just, like, took a life every." (38:24)

• Collaboration Aspiration: "We need to be in a Mr. Beast video." (44:12)

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Conclusion:

In "We're Gonna Collab With Mr. Beast," Emergency Intercom offers a blend of personal storytelling, comedic exchanges, and insightful reflections on their journey. Kai and Drew navigate through topics ranging from interpersonal relationships and mental health to the dynamics of online communities and content creation ambitions. Their authentic and humorous approach fosters a relatable and engaging listening experience, making this episode a standout for both long-time fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Drew]

The thing is, the people think we're keeping you away, like, on some, like, selfish. But it's.

[Kai]

We need it. We need a voice note. Coming soon. Oh, my God. Whoa.

[Drew]

He put on a sexy voice.

[Kai]

Whoa. Well, I guess Josh is coming soon.

[Drew]

Yeah. He's what? Soon.

[Kai]

Yeah, he. And that's the way he means it. Like that.

[Drew]

Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom, ladies and gentlemen. Boy, do we have an episode for you.

[Kai]

Let's just take it slow today. Let's just relax a little bit. We had the most stressful, stressful, stressful two weeks of our life. Yeah, like, actually the worst two weeks of our life. We got into a massive fight. Not even a massive fight. I just like, calling it a big fight.

[Drew]

I know it wasn't that deep.

[Kai]

We just literally had a conversation. But it's just fun to say. Tell people. Yeah, we got in a fight. Like telling Colin. Yeah, yeah, we just got.

[Drew]

Yeah, we're fighting. We're fighting right now. The thing is we, like, got into an argument and then five minutes later it was fine and Josiah called and I was showing my butt crack on.

[Kai]

Camera, and then we made up by eating buffalo wild wings and.

[Drew]

And I was in the wor fit ever. It was literally the best night ever. See, we turn it out. Like, we turn like a bad day into the best day.

[Kai]

You can turn us a frown upside down. Yeah, we can turn the smile upside down.

[Drew]

Yeah, I can do that with my fingers and some spit.

[Kai]

My God.

[Drew]

Anytime. What?

[Kai]

No, it was. Yeah, it was just stupid.

[Drew]

It was cute.

[Kai]

It was a. I think. I think moments like that are, like, low key cute and human. I'm just like, oh, like, yeah, we let it. We left it all on the table.

[Drew]

Weren't we just talking about that? It's like, oh, I was sitting in the car. I was like, it's crazy how. I think Kai was in the car too. I was like, it's crazy how whether it's like a platonic or romantic relationship, you were, like, bound to get into an argument. Like, at some point, like, some sort of agreement. Like, it's literally just a part of, like, building. And I think that's why a lot of people get scared out of friendships, is because, like, again, you don't see. See that a lot publicly, which makes sense because, like, what, like, me and you're gonna, like, turn on the camera when we're, like, fighting? But, like, honestly, like, if you were keeping it real, you would do that. But you're fake as.

[Kai]

But no, I'm dead ass. So Fake. Like, I'm so fake. But wait, sorry.

[Drew]

I know. I was literally just saying, like, I think that's, like, a big thing that scares people away from friendships is because they, like, start to feel bubbling of, like, whether it be, like, resentment over something small or, like, whatever, and they don't want to have that conversation, so they just did it. I'm like, no, you. If you really care about the relationship.

[Kai]

You got to talk about it. Just let it all out. Let it loose.

[Drew]

What were you saying about you being fake as fuck?

[Kai]

I just. I see a bunch of comments of people all the time being like, he's so real for this. Like, he's so real. Like, he's so mean. I'm like, bitch, I am a lie. Like, I literally lie. I'm a liar.

[Drew]

The only thing Drew doesn't lie about is when he says he bites his tongue.

[Kai]

Like, no, that's because it has physical proof and blood coming out. Like.

[Drew]

I was gonna say something else, but I guess it's not that important because it literally is a fleeing thought. The thing is, every single thought I have is a fleeing thought, and that's why I have to.

[Kai]

If we don't interrupt the person in front of us, it just will never be heard, and maybe that's for the better. But then I just, like, I get so lost thinking about that thought that I'm not listening to the conversation that we're having. So then, like, when it's, like, my turn to reciprocate the conversation, I'm just, like, cool. That's sick. That's really cool, bro. Like, awesome. And then, like, I just have nothing else to say. What's the weather like right now?

[Drew]

What we should talk about is one, thank you for the support and the merch. It was.

[Kai]

Jesus Christ.

[Drew]

Amazing. But you're going to be mad at us. You're already mad at us. You're always mad at us.

[Kai]

Literally. There's never nothing to be mad at us about.

[Drew]

We saw the multitudes of people who were freaking out about it selling out. So we were like, okay, we'll just, like, make more. But too many of you bitches decided to join in, so there will be a delay fast. Yeah, your neck looks broken. I just wanted to say, before we get, like, a plethora of comments for the next three weeks of people, like, yelling at me with, where is the merch? There will be a delay in it. As many of you know, there's already a shortage of supplies. But you don't even have tampons. You're not getting a T shirt.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

But when you do get your. You can cut it up, you can roll it up and pop it in there.

[Kai]

It doubles as a tampon. That's the thing that people aren't.

[Drew]

I bet there's. So. I bet, like, in the next week we'll see a girl on Tick Tock who's unrolling a piece of red fabric and she's like, so here's my.

[Kai]

My homemade reusable tampon.

[Drew]

My green wash. Yeah.

[Kai]

But genuinely, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all the support, and we are sorry that there's just going to be delays. We are actively, like, working on figuring out how to get.

[Drew]

After this, I will be going and printing the shirts myself.

[Kai]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, they sold out literally immediately. And then we were like, dude, this is.

[Drew]

Y' all are gonna yell at us.

[Kai]

Yeah. Like, if we sold. I don't know that we just, like, picked, like, the better off two evils. Like, I don't know. We'll see if we made the right decision.

[Drew]

So what I'm saying is don't attack me or I will kill myself.

[Kai]

She is very fragile. Yeah, she's very fragile. We're very fragile.

[Drew]

But it is a good thing to get complaints about, I guess, because it is support. But I am sorry. You don't fucking talk to me, motherfucker.

[Kai]

Also, thanks for the support on the one year anniversary.

[Drew]

I know we didn't, like, get into it, but I think it was because, like, my is so sappy and I'm like, that's embarrassing.

[Kai]

It's literally gonna be crying. Is that a notification going off over there, Meech?

[Josiah]

Yeah, it was.

[Drew]

Oh, good thing you have a microphone so we can hear what your laptop is up to.

[Josiah]

I make one mistake after a year. Literally the only mistake I've ever made.

[Kai]

Kai, we got you shoes, bro. What else do you want from us? We got you shoes and flowers.

[Drew]

Literally. One of my notes is, life is beautiful because. And it kind of has to do with, like, the year anniversary, too, because it's just like, literally, if you don't know, I've wanted to do radio host hosting since I was, like, super young and like. And when I say radio hosting, I still want to do, like, musical radio hosting at some point, but specifically I. I listened to Elvis Duran in the morning show every single day getting ready for school, and I was like, oh, my God. I literally can't believe their job is to get on the phone and call Dick's Sporting Goods and, like, ask for Balls. And like, it really is. Sometimes I'm like, what is the fucking humor we're providing for the earth. But like dick and balls has always been funny.

[Kai]

Like dick balls and farts will always be funny. It is top tier humor and you cannot convince it otherwise. Like, if someone went on stage at a stand up comedian comedy show and literally just farted into the mic and walked off, I would actually rank that in the top five sets of all time. I'm literally not even joking.

[Drew]

No, I agree. Because literally, you know what it is?

[Kai]

We're gonna go on tour and do that. Oh, emergency intercom tour soon.

[Drew]

But it's just a minute long.

[Kai]

It's just us farting.

[Drew]

But like, you know what it is? It's like how it's just at the core of it sometimes simplicity is the best. Like, sure, I could go to like a Michelin star restaurant and get like fucking chicken tenders from like a home raised chicken who was like fed fucking.

[Kai]

Like star restaurant getting chicken tenders. You're over.

[Drew]

What if it's a fucking Michelin star restaurant for chicken, motherfucker.

[Kai]

They better be making other plates and tendies.

[Drew]

Okay, anyway, I'm just fucking with you. Oh, so they make the best chicken tenders ever. And like you could go there, but like a chicken tender is a chicken tender and what beats a chicken tender is a McNugget.

[Kai]

McNugget.

[Drew]

Yeah. So it's just like, it's like, that's my perception of comedy too. Like, yes, I could go and watch a stand up special from like one of the best comedians ever. Or I could stay home and we could put on Frankie Grande's music video and play farts over it and get.

[Kai]

The same, exact, exact same amount of chemicals in our brain. I don't know if I talked about this on the last episode. I think I did briefly, or I talked about it behind the scenes, but I haven't looked at this chair, like literally since like the conception of it. And I was like looking through it and I was like, oh, there's like so many little memories in here. And it's like, like confetti and beard hair and like ash juice and shit. And it's just so cute.

[Drew]

You consider those sweet little memories?

[Kai]

No, but I did find a pocket of beard hair, like right here. And I like picked it out and was like, oh, my God, this is.

[Drew]

What'S up is for the last episode, like a production team was helping us and they had to like handle this chair. And I bet they saw and we're like, dude.

[Kai]

Yeah. Cuz it's like flat. It's like literally. It's like a comfortable chair now. Like. And all it took was me not.

[Josiah]

There's no way that's a. I know.

[Drew]

Me like convincing someone to.

[Kai]

I think. I think I literally shrank one of my.

[Drew]

Can I try it?

[Kai]

Yeah. I think my left leg is shrank cuz I walk with a limp now. And I'm not joking.

[Drew]

You walk with a limp cuz you're a.

[Kai]

It's because I'm a bottom.

[Drew]

Should we just do this?

[Kai]

This feels so weird.

[Drew]

You know what I realized?

[Kai]

I hate this.

[Drew]

After a year, I realized I've been on my bad side for a year straight.

[Kai]

I've been. I've been on my bad side. So now I'm on my good side.

[Drew]

Yeah, I know. Cuz now I'm like, wait, me don't. Is that me? Is that your impression of me? Anyways, what I was saying is life is literally so beautiful.

[Kai]

Tampons and periods and girl stuff.

[Drew]

Slut. Grinder.

[Josiah]

You really could.

[Kai]

Look, we're gonna both turn our head and you guess if this is in you or not.

[Josiah]

Okay.

[Kai]

Okay. Turn or. No, you turn your head.

[Josiah]

Okay.

[Kai]

Hi, my name is Anya and I'm on my period and I use tampons and I bake in the kitchen and stuff.

[Josiah]

Was the first voice Enya?

[Kai]

No, dude, that was me. That was Olivia.

[Drew]

Okay, turn on. Turn on.

[Kai]

Turn.

[Drew]

Grinder space. I'm scared. I'm scared my life is ending. I'm scared. I'm sick.

[Josiah]

That was true.

[Kai]

Off. That was in you.

[Josiah]

No, this is crazy.

[Kai]

No. Okay, so I'm scared. I'm scared. You should have just played a grinder sound effect. But me and Josh, on the way home from the dinner last night, we did a celebratory dinner. Like it's whatever. Like. Yeah, we treat our friends to like nice nights because we're good people.

[Drew]

Like at this point you're like, you.

[Josiah]

Don'T have to say that though.

[Drew]

Yeah, you don't have to.

[Kai]

We don't get reciprocated the same energy. So we just have to do it.

[Drew]

Whoa.

[Kai]

All the time.

[Drew]

Now you're like, I don't feel that way.

[Kai]

I don't feel that way. I'm just saying that's just the way it is.

[Drew]

That's just the way it is.

[Kai]

It's just the way it is. Okay, so me and Josh were driving home from.

[Drew]

You weren't driving. You were in a new.

[Kai]

Oh my God. Die. Die. Die.

[Drew]

You're taking responsibility for someone else's credit. Like, that's their work.

[Kai]

Oh, my God. And Josh is. I was like, dude, I feel so weird right now. I felt like I felt at that dinner a long time ago. I was telling both of you at the pasta dinner where, like, my vision feels, like, wobbly and I feel, like, disoriented and my eyes, like, are shaky. And I was like, literally, like, what the fuck is going on? And it's probably, like, hypoglycemia or hypoglycemia or some shit. But I, like, was telling Josh and he's like, dude, I've been feeling disoriented, too. And me and him just had a conversation, like, the entire ride home about, like, festering about a gas leak or mold in our house. Did we literally need to.

[Drew]

That was, like, this girl who she was talking about. She was like, it's, like, confusing because as somebody who's always had mental illness, I, like, thought that I was just, like, in a bad spot because, like, I had, like, foggy head. Like, I couldn't remember anything. I couldn't do anything. Like, I was just, like, so fatigued all the time, like, all these things. And she was like, those are all, like, kind of symptoms of, like, depression and adhd. And she was like, I just thought that was, like, was my life or whatever. But then it turned out she had, like, a gnarly mold infestation.

[Kai]

No. See, what, like, my biggest fear is, is, like, people, like, I don't go to the doctor because I'm scared of what the doctor is going to tell me.

[Drew]

I don't go to the doctor because I'm. Bitches be lying.

[Kai]

Like. Like, I'm scared they're going to be like, you have cancer for three years and you're done for. Like, that's my fear. So I don't go. And I prolong. And it probably ends up getting worse and worse. It's the same idea with getting tested for a gas leak or a mold leak. I'm like, oh, I'm scared they're going to tell me that I'm just a psychopath and it's not real.

[Josiah]

The last time I went to the doctor, they diagnosed me with bpd.

[Drew]

Big Pussy Disorder.

[Josiah]

Big penis vagina.

[Kai]

Big.

[Drew]

Yeah, Big pussy.

[Kai]

It's actually technically, yeah, that's big V. B. Yeah.

[Josiah]

Or B. Really?

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Josiah]

Oh, I actually have to go back.

[Drew]

Now because I told you they lie. I don't even know why you went.

[Josiah]

I don't know doctors. I googled the symptoms for big penis disease.

[Kai]

And.

[Drew]

But that doesn't exist.

[Kai]

No, that doesn't. That's not a real thing.

[Drew]

Yeah, it's big.

[Kai]

That's a. That's a 4chan meme that they put out there to get people to think it's a thing. You have big vagina disorder.

[Josiah]

This is not the first time.

[Drew]

I see. Well, slippery whole disorder.

[Kai]

I almost did get trolled by 4chan when I was like 12 or 14 when they put up the, like, it was like making mustard gas thing. I don't remember exactly what it was, but it was like mix this chemical in this chemical and put it in the microwave and it like makes a crystal or some shit, but it actually makes mustard gas and kills your family.

[Josiah]

It makes dmt.

[Kai]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Josiah]

I remember there was this kid bullying me in high school, and then I posted his nude phone number at the time on 4chan. I was like, this guy's bullying me. Like, you guys should bully him back. And I got these spotted. They were like, we are not your army. Instead we are going to destroy you. We're going to figure out, like, what you host your Minecraft server on.

[Kai]

And I was like, dude, Leafy is here. Used to be one of those fools that would hack Minecraft service and hold them hostage before he was a commentary YouTuber.

[Josiah]

Really?

[Kai]

Yeah. He would hack Minecraft servers, hold them hostage, like, on like, big drop days. And that's what how he made his money. He was like, dude, I would. I was like, making more money holding Minecraft servers hostage than I ever did being a youtuber.

[Josiah]

That's honestly sick as fuck.

[Kai]

Yeah, it's like really advanced, dude.

[Drew]

I was talking to Seth and Corbin at the Greer show. We were talking about, like, discord. And I was like, discord is one of the last places where you get to see how society came to be. Because it's literally like you start a discord and there's no sign of human life there. And then humans start filing in.

[Kai]

Oh, my God.

[Drew]

And they start, like, they start, like, interacting and then they start figuring out what they don't like about each other. And then they start making rules and laws against each other and. And then people start like, ganging up and being like, I really don't like the thing that person did. Like, yeah, like, and religion. Yeah, you're building, like, all these ideas. And then I was like, the other thing in like a more fun way that is. That is Minecraft. Because, like, Minecraft is literally that.

[Kai]

It's like literally just my Minecraft server was so fucking. Yeah, no, it literally Got to do an emergency intercom. Minecraft server.

[Drew]

I know. That's what I was talking to Seth about. I was like, the difference with our Minecraft server or yours was like, it literally got to a point where there was, like, there was prison and we.

[Kai]

Would have to put, like, bombers in prison. And it was crazy. And, like, griefers. And then at the very end, the.

[Drew]

Justice system was still faulty because I got blamed for bombing the city when.

[Josiah]

I didn't need checks and balances.

[Kai]

There were no chat. I was all saying all powerful, like, whatever I said went. And, like, it was so fun. And we need to do that again.

[Josiah]

Dude. I remember the early days of the Discord for emergency intercom. And it was like. I remember we made it go live and my heart was racing.

[Kai]

I know it always. It always nothing.

[Josiah]

And then all of a sudden, it's like, some people start talking like, oh, this is so cool. Discord, Discord. And they're like, this is so exciting. I've always wanted a Discord. And then, like, all of a sudden, it's like 50, 100 people, 200 people, like, joining in the first, like, 10 minutes.

[Kai]

And then after two days, it becomes.

[Josiah]

Literally by minute 15, somebody posted an image of, like, SpongeBob with C all overhead. And. And then someone said, oh, I know, Kai's, like, scared right now. And I was like, no. And I started going to the settings and, like, changing stuff, and they were like, oh, he's fudgeing up. He's like, changing the colors of people.

[Kai]

Literally, so sick. And then also the Discord servers, like, create their own dating apps because they have, like, dating channels where, like, dude, I was. I was scrolling through, like, I don't know. It was like, oh, it was a TikTok that had a bunch of, like, dating profile or like, it's basically like in a Discord chat, a dating Discord channel, it's you post your selfie and.

[Drew]

Then there's a voting it's hot or not.

[Kai]

Yeah, exactly.

[Drew]

It was Smasher Pass.

[Kai]

Yeah. And all.

[Drew]

It was so mean. So also, this wasn't the emergency.

[Kai]

Oh, no. We would literally never.

[Josiah]

I can add that easily, though.

[Kai]

No, literally not.

[Drew]

Don't do that. But I haven't been on that discord in so long because it literally got scared the.

[Josiah]

Dude, I don't go on it ever anymore.

[Drew]

It just got so scary because it literally is like, it becomes its own, like, society, and then it's like something you can't control.

[Kai]

It's like you're. Yeah, it's like an Evil baby that you birthed into this world. Like, and, like, we were like, we. We have to shut it down. We have to shut it down. Like, people are gonna kill themselves.

[Josiah]

Spiraled that one day, we were like, holy.

[Kai]

We sat in that room in my bedroom, like, just talking, dude.

[Drew]

We were like. We were like, what's gonna happen?

[Kai]

Like, we were like, literally game planning.

[Drew]

Like, the podcast has only been alive.

[Kai]

For literally, like, two months.

[Drew]

Like, two months. At that point, we were like, it's all over.

[Kai]

It's done.

[Josiah]

I feel like that's how you and I bonded deeply. One time was just realizing that we both catastrophized the shit out of situations.

[Kai]

We both, like, make, like, the worst scenario, the scenario that's gonna happen when it literally will never, ever get there.

[Drew]

I was just like, I still don't really understand Discord. So I was like, dude, why is it this, like, big, like, what's happening? And then, like, I got scared because of the way y' all were talking. I was like, dude, is it that deep? Like, does it get that scary on there? But I've always. I've said this before, like, now because of that, I know there are good discords. And, like, I've been in other discords for, like, topics that I like. But, like, discord, Reddit, not so much anymore, because the Reddit page that was talking about me in, like, a freaky way, I guess our followers got it deleted because it's been gone for, like, a while.

[Kai]

I didn't know that it got deleted that.

[Drew]

Yeah, it's been gone for, like, a minute, which, like, thank you. But also, like, damn, now nobody wants to come tribute. Like, literally, like, nobody wants to fuck me anymore.

[Kai]

I still haven't gotten a cum tribute, which is fucking crazy, actually.

[Josiah]

You have, Drew.

[Drew]

Kai's just never showed you. He showed me.

[Josiah]

I showed Anya.

[Drew]

It was on a paper. It was on a printed paper of you. And, like, you know when, like, you put water in a paper and it starts sagging and, like, eventually it rips through? Like, that was his contribute for you. He, like, went to go show me it, and it was like, it. Dude, it. The paper was, like, really strong. It might have been watercolor paper or something. Yeah, because it was just, like, denting. And I was like, kai, you got to put that down. And it was, like, seeping through, like a cheesecloth and, like, kind of dripping. And I was like, dude, you need to, like, you need to throw that away. I've been working on it for a year. Well, it's because he went to go show it to me, and it just.

[Josiah]

Like, hit the floor, burst open.

[Drew]

Yeah. And he's like.

[Kai]

It gelatinized my parents.

[Josiah]

Like, tuning into the podcast, like, once every five episodes, dude.

[Drew]

Yeah. I hate when people don't know. They're like, I'm gonna listen to that. I'm like, please, no, do not, like, do not do that.

[Kai]

You have to.

[Drew]

You have to naturally. You should not be.

[Kai]

Yeah, you have to listen from the beginning. Because if you just listen to a random episode, it doesn't make sense. Me.

[Drew]

As if there's a plot line. Yeah, no, you have to start.

[Kai]

Someone made, like, a tick tock about that, actually. That I like. I don't. Oh, no, it was your TikTok of you talking to that girl about the, like, the date where you're like. It's like. Like, we joke about, like, diarrhea and, like, eating shit and, like, I have an inside joke. It's honestly funny.

[Drew]

Like, it's funny when I, like, explain it to people. I have come to, like, a spot where, like, the best way I describe it to people is because this is true.

[Kai]

Like, isn't it nice to put your foot here? Like, so awesome.

[Drew]

Yeah.

[Kai]

You get it now.

[Drew]

I feel like I'm sitting hella, like, masculine, and it's, like, making me insecure.

[Kai]

You want to switch back?

[Drew]

You want to switch back?

[Kai]

No, I feel like this works.

[Josiah]

Honestly, I'm not.

[Kai]

I. It's not gonna be permanent. I won't. I won't allow that.

[Drew]

I do like this chair, though. But it is, like, not like, I'm like, I understand the way you move in it now because I, like, want to lean back, but I'm like, you can't lean back because then you're so far from the mic. Actually, I might be the first person to lean back in this chair.

[Kai]

Lean back. Lean back. Hey, lean back.

[Drew]

What was I saying? Oh, I've. This just happened naturally, but literally all we do is write down stupid thoughts in our notes app and then, like, share them to each other for each episode. And that's how I describe it to people now.

[Kai]

I just call it. It's just like, unmedicated ADHD psychobabble. And that's literally it.

[Drew]

I don't have that, so don't say that about me.

[Josiah]

Apologize. Apologize.

[Kai]

Dude. White knight over there, bro. Like, not. She's not gonna bone you, bro.

[Drew]

I might hit. You never know.

[Kai]

You're not gonna hit that, bro.

[Drew]

I'm gonna hit that. Yeah, I hit that. Honestly, I hit that so many times. It's boring now.

[Kai]

Nice guys literally do finish last in.

[Drew]

Terms of, like, sexually. They finish last.

[Kai]

Yeah, No, I saw they make real squirt, like, a crazy dissection of it. It was, like, literally, nice guys finish last because, like, mean people, like, know what they want. And, like, some people, like, want someone to make decisions for them. That's how I am. I'm like, I literally want, like, I don't want to have to pick where we're going out to eat. Like, I want you to tell me where we're going, and then also, I'm.

[Drew]

Gonna get in the car, and you are going to drive, and I'm going to sit there on my iPhone.

[Kai]

Yeah. And you're gonna make it happen, literally. And I. To have a conversation. Like, that's the dream.

[Drew]

You don't want to talk, so you.

[Kai]

Want to show unironically. Like, that is my vibe is, like, a relationship where I don't talk.

[Josiah]

So you want to be, like, a trophy wife?

[Kai]

Yes. Literally. Yes.

[Drew]

You want me taken care of?

[Kai]

Yes. Oh, my God, that sounds so nice.

[Drew]

I know.

[Kai]

It.

[Drew]

It always sounds nice, but I'm just.

[Kai]

Like, I want it, but it's not something that I could actually live. Like, I need my own.

[Drew]

Like, I need my own life. Yeah.

[Kai]

Because, like, we were talking about something yesterday where I was like, I always, like, think about wanting to do that, but then I remember that. Oh, no. I was talking to Josh about it. I was like, I. I think I've, like, become, like, a slight workaholic, which I never thought was possible, but I was, like, talking about, like. Like, oh, like, what it would look like if I ever retired, like, in, like, 10 years, 15 years. And I was like, I don't even know if I, like, would be able to do that. Like, because I already consider what I do now nothing. So, like, what is doing nothing on top of this? Like, I don't know how to make, like, form words. Form that into words. But, like, I don't know. Like, I. And then I was like, dude, like, I have to, like, work forever. I'll freak the out because I've gotten on this schedule, and I'm like, I love this schedule. No, I literally hear from it all spiral.

[Drew]

I was literally made to, like, chill and, like, slayer. Like, I was, like, built to do that. Like, I wasn't built to, like, to, like, respond to people and, like, do this.

[Kai]

You are so bad at responding to people. It's crazy.

[Drew]

I know. The one thing I was not meant to have, an iPhone with text messages. Like on it. Because I cannot do that. Like, don't text me. Like, honestly sometimes don't even call me because sometimes when people call me I'm just like, oh, like no, thank you.

[Kai]

Yeah, just.

[Drew]

But I am better. I'm way better. I, I will answer a phone call, but a text message. If you text me for something, bitch.

[Kai]

You'Re not getting, you're not getting a response. Maybe ever. Like literally maybe ever. Yeah, until you see her in person next. It's. It's wild. I used to. Cuz it was a new thing. It, it's like a new thing in the last like two years because of.

[Drew]

How often I was like, I leave now.

[Kai]

Yeah, yeah, it was like a new thing. And like you've just been valuing your time with your family more and like, which is like fudgeing annoying. And she's like, get on that iPhone and text me back what we have.

[Drew]

You don't think I should, like, my family is like really important to me.

[Kai]

No, I love your family. But like we got to gossip about some shit. Like we got some shit to talk.

[Drew]

I mean that. I will, like, I will.

[Kai]

I've literally been like loving gossiping recently. Not like saying shit but like getting shit said to me and I like, I eat it up. I'm like, yeah, tell me more.

[Drew]

Dude, gossip is good as long as it's not endangering like the well being of someone else. Like as long as you're not like outing someone's personal information to an extent that is like fucking gnarly. Like gossiping is good. Literally. Again, I get all my news from fucking TikTok, but this girl was talking about the idea of gossiping was villainized because men didn't enjoy the fact that women could have like sit down and like, and like a deep like connection via like what they were up to and what they thought and like. Because a lot of like. And even using the word gossip is like, okay, it's not gossip. It's literally what's happening in my friend's life. Like that's my friend's life and how they feel. And it just so happened to be one of the most interesting things I've heard all day.

[Kai]

There is like a line that like with gossip that can't be crossed. Like there are some things that like I've said, like personally and like that they've like confided in you. And Kai is really good about that where he's like, no, like I don't want to lose this person's trust. Like I Don't want to fucking tell you about that.

[Drew]

Yeah, I literally won't. Even if. If someone told me something that I know I can't share, I, like, I won't even bring that up. Like, literally, I will just be like.

[Kai]

Oh, I've been so good at keeping secrets. I have so many secrets from, like, so many people I love.

[Drew]

I'm a good keeper, secret keeper. The only problem is, is I'm a really bad liar. So I can keep. I can keep a secret. Like, I don't give a. Like, I will, like, never like, break, but if anybody asks me a question about it, I literally have to get up and move. Like, I'm like, I can't.

[Kai]

And you just starts laughing. Like, she doesn't. She won't if it's. If it's a yes or a no question. She just laughs and doesn't answer, and you can just assume the. The real answer.

[Drew]

It's really bad. It's just like, I'm, like, a truthful person, and I was, like, bred different than you bitches. You guys are, like, lying freaks. But I don't know.

[Kai]

I had to lie to survive.

[Drew]

I don't know what it is. Like, I just, like, I'm a really bad liar. I think it. I don't know what it is, but that's always been a thing with me. Like, I've just, like, I, like, can't keep a lie to. Like, I can't keep a straight face while I'm lying. So I just don't even put myself in the position where, like, something like that I'm withholding will get brought up. I'll just, like, avoid, avoid, avoid, avoid. But, yeah, gossiping is fun.

[Kai]

I just looked at Kai was like, oh, yeah. But it's not real. You know that.

[Josiah]

It's real.

[Drew]

It's all love, baby girl.

[Josiah]

Okay, thank you.

[Drew]

We're gonna get you a name plate that says our baby.

[Kai]

No, we got Mason that.

[Drew]

Well, we have multiple babies.

[Kai]

Yeah. Kai, you like those shoes, bro?

[Josiah]

Yeah. Can they see them? Wait, sand falls out somehow.

[Drew]

They're not in frame at all.

[Kai]

Oh, yeah, they are.

[Drew]

There. They are peeking.

[Kai]

Yeah, we got him. The Vibram, Arcterics, Gore Tex joints.

[Josiah]

That's easy for me.

[Kai]

Yeah. I can't tell if he likes them or not, and I don't know.

[Drew]

Yeah, Kai is, like, impossible to read. I don't think he likes them.

[Kai]

I know. And I'm like, literally.

[Josiah]

No, I do like them. I wouldn't wear them if I didn't like them.

[Kai]

Word.

[Josiah]

I like Them. I like them also because they have a really big soul and they make me really tall.

[Drew]

Like your dolls kill platforms.

[Kai]

Well, what y' all don't know is Kai is literally five seven in those shoes. In those shoes. He's five seven. He's five five and a half. He makes sure to tell the half. It's crazy.

[Josiah]

I am not five, five and a half.

[Kai]

That's someone who's five, five and a half. That's something they would say.

[Drew]

Yeah, I know.

[Josiah]

Oh, my God. I just.

[Drew]

If I was one of the smallest men in every single room I walked into, I would probably say say that too.

[Josiah]

I can see the comments on my Instagram for the next four months. Just five, five.

[Kai]

I know.

[Drew]

Literally you can't say a joke to them without them being like, oh, I'm running that. Oh, I'm running that.

[Josiah]

They're running it on every platform.

[Kai]

It's like, Kai is not five, five and a half.

[Drew]

He's five' three.

[Kai]

He's a miniature. We got him out of one of those.

[Drew]

Taller, the same height.

[Kai]

You're a little taller than me.

[Josiah]

I think I'm like 4 to 7 inches taller than you.

[Drew]

I think Kai is taller than you.

[Kai]

Yeah, I think he has.

[Drew]

Because that's what I was thinking about when we were getting your shoes. I was like, kai's a little taller, so it makes sense if he was a half size up.

[Josiah]

Yeah, because you're six four and I'm like six, six, six, seven.

[Kai]

Yeah, well, no, you're six six, and.

[Drew]

This is all you've done for yourself with that.

[Kai]

I'm 6 3.

[Drew]

Implying that being a tall man, we.

[Kai]

Need to do that.

[Drew]

You should be a millionaire or something.

[Kai]

We need to do the height comparison. Tik Tok. Have you seen that?

[Drew]

No.

[Kai]

It's like a Tik Tok where, like, squad compares heights.

[Drew]

I think I might be the shortest in the squad.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Cuz Orion's taller than me. Elisa is taller than me.

[Kai]

Elisa's taller than me.

[Drew]

Yeah. Elisa's a tall girl, dude.

[Kai]

I will never forget being in that elevator with all those models and like, literally them towering over me and I was like, damn, I'm not like a short person, but, like, in that room, I felt tiny. It was crazy.

[Drew]

I would have. I would have went home and, like, done a deed that, like, would have changed the course of your life forever.

[Kai]

If genuinely, genuinely thought about extending my femur.

[Josiah]

You should do that. I think they just. They only do that procedure in China right now, right?

[Kai]

I. I have no idea.

[Josiah]

Isn't that, like a thing I remember.

[Drew]

We could go. We could just take the podcast with us and we'll film with you in bed.

[Kai]

It's podcast in Iceland. Coming soon.

[Josiah]

The. The recovery for that procedure is like two years. Like, you, like, can't walk for like eight months and then they can only do like an inch. Is the camera good?

[Kai]

I'm just staring at them. Oh, my God.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. Don't do that to them. They don't like that. Ew.

[Kai]

Yeah. No, it is like the worst healing process possible on that surgery.

[Josiah]

I think you just get like an inch too.

[Kai]

Oh, my God. Anything more literally, this. I know we keep, like, I keep bringing this up and let me not say we because it's literally me, but, like, it's integral to this story, but I literally have to say it. And it's embarrassing to say it because I'm one of those people now, but I have like a personal trainer. But it's. It's what he said to me will stick with me for the rest of my life. Like, it was the craziest thing. Like, so I have not worked out since, like freshman year of high school. Like, lifted weights or ran or anything. I've just kind of been like. Like I. I've like worked out in between. Like, doing like hot Pilates and things like that. But like, not like proper. Like strength. Yeah, strength training. So with that comes like literally looking like an infant and having infant sized muscles. Well, my trainer, like, it was like cardio cooldown and he was like, we're gonna do something that like, works out your. Is it your lats or your delts? I don't know. The. The muscle that's right beside your shoulder blade. And then like, you pull down on these bars like this and it works out this muscle. And he was like, he was like showing me where the muscle was and he like touched it and he was like, oh. Like, I could. I could barely find it. Like, you have baby lats or you have baby delts? And he was like, you have the bait. You have delts of a baby. And I was like, I'm a 24 year old. I'm a 16 year old man and you're telling me I have baby? Then he. I just forgot. Like, I always forget that I'm 16. But he. I cannot wait to be 18. Like, it's gonna be like, I'm gonna smoke cigarettes and why don't you.

[Drew]

I could get you some now. I could get you cigarettes and alcohol because I'm 23.

[Kai]

Why don't you do that? Because that's weird of you to hang out with a 16 year old. Like, that is so. I literally don't want big age. You're hanging out with a 16 year old.

[Drew]

You're literally like, you don't. Like. You won't like me. So it's like, why. Like, why does it matter?

[Kai]

Oh, my God. You know nothing about me. You really don't know anything about it.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. Not me getting in trouble for outing.

[Kai]

A 16 year old right now. No, I. But then his reaction, like, he. He caught what he said. I didn't. I didn't react. I didn't react to it at all. And. But it did, like, in my brain, like, like, set a little fire.

[Drew]

But he also called you, like, did he. Wait, was it him who called you dyslexic? No, it was the acting coach.

[Kai]

Yeah, the acting coach called me dyslexic.

[Drew]

He's like, damn, you're. You're dyslexic.

[Kai]

You're dyslexic, aren't you? And I was like, yeah, it's like, you read really slow for a grown person. But, yeah, he realized what he said, and he kind of, like, cowered away and was like, oh, I should not have said that. It didn't offend me until he, like, realized that it could have been offensive. I don't know if that makes sense.

[Josiah]

Yeah, complete sense.

[Kai]

I was like, damn, it went over.

[Drew]

Your head until you realized, oh, he was kind of being me.

[Kai]

Yeah. And then I. But I didn't take it to heart or anything because I know, like, I'm, like, big. And it's crazy because I already have, like, muscles. Like.

[Drew]

You know how I said, like, men? Like, from the very beginning, I've said men working out is embarrassing. It doesn't change for Drew because it's all he talks about now.

[Josiah]

But you feel better, huh?

[Kai]

I physically. I do. I actually do feel better. Like, and in my brain, like, I feel better.

[Drew]

No, it literally is, like, you hate to admit it, but it gives you dopamine. It literally is like, it's because it's what your human body was made to do. Oh. When I was working out with the trainer, I kept cracking up because I was like, dude, humans are so funny. We just decided to go in and make machines that mimic, like, human labor from, like, 1734. Like, literally, like, one of them is, like, this, like, row machine, and I'm like, literally, I feel like I'm, like, rowing Noah's ark right now. Like, why am I, like, Doing this.

[Kai]

It's literally just a big kid playground. Like, it's an adult playground.

[Drew]

It's like, it is high school.

[Kai]

It's also so dystopian in there. Like, it really is, like a weird, sinister vibe. But I've already, like, caught myself, like, getting addicted to it in a way where I'm like. Which is good, but also, like, could be a very gnarly thing. But because I have, like, an incredibly addictive personality where if I don't take the weekend off or like, take days off in between, like, I will, like, ruin my body somehow. But, like, I catch myself being like, oh, I can like swing, like going like two times a day somehow. Like, I can get in there like two.

[Drew]

Well, you're also just like one of the most bored humans ever.

[Kai]

Yeah. And then I'm like, oh. Like, if I go every day, I could like, maybe figure out a way to like, make it like a three and a half hour workout where I have like an hour off in between.

[Drew]

Like, instead of recession, like coming home and playing Call of Duty for like three miles.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

The thing is about me is, like, if I have to pick, like, the gym or Fortnite, I'm picking Fortnite.

[Kai]

Really?

[Drew]

I'm gonna go do Fortnite. I'm gonna make time for four.

[Kai]

We should make real Fortnite. Did you know they made Fortnite a real thing?

[Drew]

They need to put PS5s in our brains. In our brains and in treadmills so I can play Fortnite while I'm at the gym.

[Kai]

They're developing that technology.

[Drew]

So fun. Like, are you kidding me? I'm gonna wait. I'm actually just going to put Fortnite on my switch and connect to the gym. WI fi and play Fortnite at the gym.

[Kai]

Run and slow down as like you're going. Cuz there is a machine there that like that. I tried that. You, like, it goes to your pace. So like, if you're walking, it like walks and then if you're sprinting, it speeds up with you and sprints. But it's only like straight up and down and backwards. You can't like, go side to side.

[Drew]

Oh, I saw you doing that when I was working out. That was also making me laugh a lot.

[Josiah]

Why don't we just do Fortnite in real life?

[Kai]

Like just kill people.

[Josiah]

Yeah, you just drop a bunch of people on an island and have them fight to the death.

[Kai]

I'm down.

[Drew]

We did that with Hunger Games. Have you seen that documentary?

[Josiah]

Okay. And yeah, that's not a documentary, though.

[Drew]

What?

[Josiah]

That's a movie.

[Drew]

Wait, what's that?

[Josiah]

What's a movie?

[Drew]

Yeah.

[Kai]

Are you questioning a woman right now?

[Drew]

I know, like, what you're, like. You're trying to make me feel, like, small and stupid.

[Kai]

Like, quit gaslighting her. We know. We all know Hunger Games is real.

[Drew]

Yeah, like, what? Did your parents tell you that wasn't real?

[Josiah]

What the fuck is going on?

[Drew]

You've been coddled all your fucking life.

[Kai]

Yeah, bro. Like, that caught me so off guard. Like, literally, you saying Hunger Games is a documentary caught me off guard. Like, don't. You know?

[Drew]

But, no, you can't do Fortnite in real life, because one time in Fortnite, I landed, like, on the outskirts of the island and, like, where, like, people who abandoned their PlayStations and shit, like, end up just landing, and, like, someone had landed and then activated an emote of their person sitting and eating popcorn, like, on a chair. And I, like, saw them, and I went up, like, really close, and it was just there, like, character in my face, and they weren't moving. I was like, dude, they literally just, like, activated this emo and, like, left. And then I took out my gun to shoot them, and I, like, like, aimed for them and, like, killed them. And something about it felt really wrong. Like, I literally, like, the deep, deep, really human part of my, like, caveman brain was like, you just, like, took a life every.

[Kai]

No, it was literally, like, every once in a while, when I'm playing Call of Duty, I, like, think about what I'm doing and, like, why am I, like, having fun, like, killing virtual people? Like, why? What part of my brain, like, is, like, this is what I need to do with three hours of my day.

[Josiah]

The reason why it's so addicting is because there's an actual person on the other hand, that you're, like, life away.

[Drew]

No, literally, because if it. If, like, I don't play, like, I don't go out of my way. I don't know anybody who goes out of their way to play, like, the story mode on Call of Duty.

[Kai]

Like, no one is doing.

[Drew]

No one does that literally, just to, like, fight other people. Which it could be as simple as, like, winning a game. So it feels good to win a game, but, like, I don't know. But for that reason, I just. I wouldn't do Fortnite in real life because you.

[Kai]

You have to kill people.

[Drew]

My brain is so tapped into Fortnite still, though, because when I was at the gym and I was sprinting, like, tactical Sprinting? Yeah.

[Kai]

You're like, wait, let me slide real quick.

[Drew]

No, I. I was like, sprinting, and then I was thinking about, like, at the bottom of.

[Kai]

You did not do this.

[Drew]

I was thinking of the bar at the left bottom of the screen where it tells you how much stamina in Fortnite you have to run. And I like, every time I'm playing, I'm like, damn, you can't run longer than that. But then as I was doing, I was like, you know what? Like, that is a really real thing that, like, I couldn't run that fast for that long.

[Kai]

The stamina bar in any video game is the worst thing they've ever put implemented. I hate. I. I hate anything that's just not a health bar. Like, hunger, thirst. Like, why add hunger and thirst? Pick one if you're gonna put it like, I can't. I can't do that shit. It's like. So it becomes like a game where I have to fucking drink water and eat food. Like, it's not like a fun game.

[Drew]

And you're playing the game to avoid that. So it's like, why am I literally.

[Kai]

Exactly. Exactly.

[Drew]

Why does my feet getting so warm in the bath never.

[Kai]

Let me see. Can you take this off?

[Drew]

You want me to take my shoes off?

[Kai]

Yeah, take your shoe off. Let me see something.

[Drew]

Why do you want to see something? I don't have socks on.

[Kai]

I just want to see, like, how manicured your toes are.

[Drew]

They're not manicured. So now what?

[Kai]

I just. Okay. Like, I just want to.

[Drew]

Someone. Actually, I saw a comment somewhere because my feet were in frame of something and someone was like, this girl always got her toes done. And I was like, thank you. Wow. I was like, that's the thing about me is my toes are gonna be.

[Josiah]

That was me commenting from my Burner account.

[Drew]

I don't think I've ever seen your bare feet, and I would like to keep it that way.

[Kai]

Oh, I've seen them before in Joshua Tree.

[Josiah]

They're good.

[Drew]

Oh, maybe I have. I didn't look.

[Josiah]

But. And you would maybe even say that they're good, right? Okay.

[Kai]

I'd say they're not bad.

[Josiah]

Okay, I appreciate that.

[Drew]

I don't know how I feel about your feet.

[Kai]

I have. Disgusting.

[Drew]

Okay. I was.

[Kai]

I was gonna say I have long feet and my pinky toe, like, is turned underneath my ring finger toe. Like it's underneath. It looks like I was like, foot binded as a child. It's crazy. It's literally a crazy vibe.

[Drew]

Orion told me I have Nice feet. And then we looked at our wiki feet, but there's something.

[Kai]

Wait, do you have a wiki Wiki feet?

[Drew]

Yeah. Should I?

[Kai]

I want to see if I have one.

[Drew]

I bet mine had a higher score than me. And I was jealous. I was like, damn, maybe I need to put more foot.

[Kai]

Oh, sorry. I just opened my phone and I'm on the emergency intercom merch site.

[Drew]

By the time this comes out, the site is like, like, done. So it's like, why even, like, say that? Oh, wait, yeah.

[Kai]

Wait. I don't even think I have one. Which is like, that sucks for you. A blow to my ego. They won't verify me and they won't make me.

[Drew]

Literally a penis on this.

[Kai]

Ew, nasty.

[Drew]

Wait, that's Enya. Like the singer or like, what? Oh, no. Yeah, this is any of the singer. Damn, she has beautiful feet. She's a. She's a 4.7.

[Kai]

This is humiliating. Damn. No come tributes. No wiki feet. Literally. What is my.

[Drew]

Well, people want to have sex with you in real life. That's what you.

[Kai]

That is the truth. When people. That's the thing about me is when people meet me in real life, they're like, wait, I. This guy is so weird.

[Drew]

What the. I can't find my weak need to know more. I did.

[Kai]

It's the truth and kind knows it.

[Josiah]

But that's like you saying that that's not what. Like a weird, mysterious guy. That's not how that actually works. Like, people say that, not like the guy. If you were actually weird and mysterious, you would never be like, I'm weird and mysterious.

[Kai]

I never said that.

[Josiah]

You just said that.

[Kai]

I said other people say that about me.

[Josiah]

Okay, yeah, I guess you technically got.

[Drew]

But who said that about you?

[Kai]

Oh, several people. I can't name names. Look how long this is, child. Do you see?

[Drew]

It's always your hair that's attached to another piece of hair that fell out. And you're like, look how long this is.

[Kai]

My hair is matted. I need it cut so bad.

[Drew]

I can cut it.

[Kai]

I'm waiting until New York because I want to go to that one barber that, like, slaves boots and is really cheap.

[Drew]

I. Fuck. I was gonna say something else.

[Kai]

Yeah, I only get my hair cut in New York.

[Drew]

Okay?

[Kai]

I fly to New York for a haircut.

[Drew]

Mr. Beast is insane. I need to be in a Mr. Beast video. He won't answer my DM.

[Kai]

No, Mr. Beast. Emergency intercom collab. Like, let's make it happen.

[Drew]

I need to be in a Mr. Beast video. I need to. I need. And I will tap out immediately. I'm kidding. If you're watching this, I will. Like, I'll win. I'll win the damn thing.

[Kai]

Wait, that would be so fun to actually be.

[Drew]

That's what I'm saying. We need to be in a Mr. Beast video. Video.

[Kai]

Mr. Beast put us in a video. Like, everybody. That is Fly me out though business. Get flown out. No. Everybody where's North Carolina is listening to this. Tell Mr. Vista, put us in a video.

[Drew]

Wait, where's. Does he live in North Carolina?

[Kai]

I think so.

[Drew]

Oh, but you got to pay me a lot of money.

[Kai]

We got a business class. They don't even have business class.

[Drew]

It's a train. You got to take the train there.

[Kai]

They got a Greyhound bus.

[Drew]

Okay, put me in business class and put me up in, like, a Four Seasons, and I'll go. Me, me.

[Kai]

As he's asking. I want a view. I want a view of the parking lot and the rolling hills. What's her name? Hairspray.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. Wait, I look that up.

[Kai]

Oh, that pisses me off that I don't have that off the top of my head. I'm literally, like, losing my mind. Alzheimer's, dementia.

[Drew]

Your mom. Hello, Nikki blondeski.

[Kai]

Ms. Blonsky is, like, it is crazy that we've gone a year and haven't spoken once about Nikki Blonsky, but she is that girl.

[Drew]

I'm trying to find her hotel review that.

[Kai]

Yeah, the only reason the hotel review is maybe the, like, top 10 funniest content put on the Internet of all time. And also, I got a message from her through cameo. Someone bought a cameo for me. Madeline bought us a cameo.

[Drew]

Yeah, it was awesome. Okay, I found it. This is what we want out of our hotel room that Mr. Beast gives us. Yeah, we'll put it on screen, but me and Drew have to watch it.

[D]

Guys, what's up? It is Nikki. I am finishing day three of Kazakhon.

[Kai]

Kazakhan, West Virginia.

[D]

You've taken such good care of me. I love you all, but they went above. This place is just mind blowing. That's amazing. Me, when I lie, I'm just saying beautiful artwork on walls. And then.

[Drew]

Then you do this, and you look at this.

[D]

The window to gorgeous West Virginia.

[Kai]

Oh, those words have never been uttered. Gorgeous West Virginia has never been said.

[Drew]

That's literally going to be us in North Carolina.

[Kai]

Like, if Mr. Be.

[D]

I've never had biscuits and gravy before, and. Oh, my God, Glade Springs. You have turned me into a biscuit. And gravy lover. Thanks. Okay, seriously. I know I just said I never.

[Drew]

Had in the dark gravy.

[D]

This is the most delicious thing I've ever eaten in my life.

[Drew]

Joking.

[Kai]

Yeah, dude. Oh, my God. Yeah, Mr. Beast. Like, if you fly.

[Drew]

Look at that TV.

[Kai]

Like, look at that artwork. Beautiful artwork on the walls. It's, like, wholesale from Wayfair. That view is gorgeous. But literally, I know what mindset she was in. Like, she doesn't actually think that's the nicest place she's ever been to. She's saying that so she gets invited back and she probably. It was probably a brand deal.

[Drew]

Yeah, it definitely was.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Because she tagged the hotel, like, in every single frame.

[Kai]

Yeah. So she had to say, so I support her. She's getting her bag.

[Drew]

That's what we need from Mr. Beast. I need business class and I need to be put up in a nice hotel. Now I'm boring with, like, nobody.

[Kai]

Because he literally doesn't know Mr. Beast. This is the video idea. Maybe you rent out an airplane and we have to. No, we have to live on the airplane for, like, 30 days. Two weeks. Two weeks on an airplane. No, we get to go somewhere once a week. But we don't get to take. Get out of the airplane. We just have to stay in the first class section.

[Josiah]

So your, your idea is for the Mr. Beast videos to have him first class just fly you to places.

[Kai]

Exactly.

[Drew]

And we can fake it that we stay in the plane all the time.

[Kai]

Wait, but that is, like, a Mr. Beast video where, like, I rented out a $1 billion airplane for an entire month and I had to live inside of it and I couldn't leave.

[Drew]

The first class video of him not eating is literally the funniest thing.

[Kai]

The best, best single piece of content ever made on YouTube.

[Drew]

I, I, that is really so insane. But no, for real, though. Like, hit me up. Hit my line. My DMS are open.

[Kai]

Mr. Beast. Yeah, literally.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. Imagine he actually, like, hits us up.

[Kai]

Would we actually do it? I would, I would actually do it.

[Drew]

I would, like, carve out, and I'm a busy woman, so, like, we're busy people. Keep that in mind.

[Kai]

We would have, we would have to be able to record the podcast while we're staying in the room for two weeks.

[Drew]

Yeah, so because you have to make yourself, like, available. Like, you have to, like, show you want something, but then make yourself seem so unavailable that, like, he's like, well, like, I guess I really need these people in my videos.

[Kai]

Yeah. So actually, I don't Even know if.

[Drew]

Yeah. I don't know. I don't know if I can make it work out. Like, it sounds like a lot, but.

[Kai]

Like, we could probably figure it out.

[Drew]

Yeah. If you beg. If you beg and plead. But, like, it would be embarrassing to see you begging and pleading, so just, like, begging.

[Kai]

Begging you.

[Drew]

What I was gonna say is, why would my feet get so warm in the shower? I get horny.

[Kai]

Oh.

[Drew]

Oh, my God. They smell good, huh?

[Kai]

I thought that's what we were doing.

[Drew]

You thought we were initiating foreplay.

[Kai]

Okay.

[Drew]

You know what I'm saying, though? You know what I'm saying?

[Kai]

I agree with you on a lot of things that make you horny, but, like, that.

[Josiah]

No one agrees.

[Kai]

That is.

[Drew]

Maybe it's because I'm so iron deficient. So then when my feet get warm, I'm like, oh, my God. Human touch.

[Kai]

I get. Oh, wait, no. I literally don't agree with that. I. Is that Azul opening the door? Did he open the door?

[Drew]

No, it's Josh, the other human in the house.

[Kai]

Oh.

[Josiah]

The image in Drew's head is, like, Azul, like, picking up a briefcase and a top hat to go to work.

[Kai]

All right, I'm off to work, honey. No, I don't agree with you. I just looked at your boobs.

[Drew]

You should really.

[Kai]

Mm. I just had to let you know, I got called.

[Drew]

I got flirted with and called Mommy in the white version of this tank top.

[Kai]

It was crazy, and I think it was. Guys, stop looking.

[Drew]

I think it was because it was by a shorter man who was, like, forced to be at eyesight with my boobs all day, and then he couldn't help himself.

[Kai]

It was actually. It was actually the craziest vibe ever. Like, I don't want to air it out too much because, like, we'll probably see this person again because he's just, like, in the circle. But, like, it was a weird vibe.

[Drew]

It was insane.

[Kai]

And the only reason it got weird was because we thought. We assumed something about him that was just not real.

[Drew]

And we'll leave it at that.

[Kai]

Yeah. And then we'll. We'll cut the episode there.

[Drew]

It caught me off guard big time. I've never. Mommy, Mama, I need milk. Ew. Don't look at me eyes and say that to me. Sam, if you don't get the feet thing, it's because you're not, like, chill, whatever.

[Kai]

I. I. Sure.

[Drew]

We can move on.

[Kai]

You've silenced the room.

[Josiah]

Can you do the baby voice one more time?

[Drew]

Can I have some papa milk? Can I have Some of your milk, Daddy. Ew. Please, you sound like you're farting. It's like.

[Kai]

Oh, it's do the fart. That one was good.

[Josiah]

I'll cut it.

[Drew]

It took you a couple tries. All right.

[Kai]

Okay. What time are we at?

[Josiah]

15 minutes.

[Drew]

Oh, fuck.

[Kai]

Are we good to do media?

[Josiah]

Yeah.

[Kai]

What is it?

[Josiah]

55.

[Drew]

Holy crap. But yeah. So what we've learned today is we need more thirst. You know what it is? I don't think I've posted enough photos of myself recently. So the thirsting for Anya has, like, died down. Yeah, I just don't post enough content me. But don't worry, I'll get those pics out. I'll do the damn thing and you talk your half of it, which is like, thirsting over. I did see a TikTok that, like, it was like, some of the more like, like, sensual, leaning photos of me. The thing is, because you all tag me in so much stuff on Tik Tok, and I, like, go through my, like, tags and I, like, go, watch what you tag me in. TikTok now makes my timeline. Like, you bitches don't get away. Like, if you are talking shit, if you were posting, like, a thirst thing, whatever. It gets on my timeline.

[Kai]

We got a Dead and Lee feature on ig.

[Drew]

I know. We got a Devin and Addison.

[Kai]

Oh, like, I'm like, are you in.

[Drew]

Oh, no, not in Addison's. I'm saying, like, via Devin. I'm in the same carousel as Addison. We're in the same carousel.

[Kai]

Oh, wait, where's Addison?

[Drew]

Addison Ray is very sexy. I'll say that.

[Kai]

That's.

[Drew]

She is hot as bones. She is hot as wing meat on wheels, but she.

[Kai]

And she's also, like, super fucking sweet and, like, surprisingly charismatic and. Yeah.

[Drew]

Which makes sense.

[Kai]

Yeah. Like, you don't get to the position you're in if you're not charismatic. Like, yeah, just I've had such.

[Drew]

You know, the baby wraps where you wrap around, like, I need to stop doing this. Because I was like, I need to stop thirsting over the women I know in real life. And then when I see them, I'm just like, hey. I'm like, oh, my God.

[Kai]

Hey.

[Drew]

As if, like, two days before, I.

[Kai]

Wasn'T like, I publicly, like, I'm going to milk her knocker.

[Drew]

But back to me, someone posted a thing like, it was like a. And I couldn't find it again because they didn't tag me. And I don't know how it ended up on my timeline, but it was probably because the Comments were saying my name. Say my name. Say my name Anyway, but it was, like, pictures of me. I was like, damn. There are some, like, sensual photos of me, like, that are public, like, and they're not, like, the craziest thing, but I'm like. When they're in a slide like this, I'm like, damn, for free.

[Kai]

Way.

[Drew]

Like, I just did that for free. Some of them were paid. Some of them were paid a quarter.

[Kai]

Of a million dollars a month starting only fans.

[Drew]

No. Why are you mad at me?

[Kai]

Just do it.

[Drew]

You get to see it for free, though. But you want to take advantage of Meat financially.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Okay, good.

[Kai]

Exactly.

[Drew]

That's the. That's why we're here together.

[Kai]

All right. All right, let's tap into some media.

[Drew]

I want Addison Rae, you know, the baby. Things like that moms, like, wrap around themselves and put the infant in and.

[Kai]

You want to be held.

[Drew]

I want that.

[Kai]

She has maternal energy. Yeah, she really does.

[Drew]

I want her to wrap me up like a little infant.

[Kai]

Oh, that's really good of you. Okay, I'll tap in because I already got my three. Okay. I'm going to say Empathy by Crystal Castles. Certified classic. Billy. Not really by Death Grips. And the second Twilight by Deep Forest. And honestly, let's just add in Cookie Thumper by Diane Word. Or maybe. Oh, wait, I just been on a Diane Word kick recently, and I know they, like, took blood from their baby and drank it or some, but, like, I can separate the music from the artist.

[Drew]

Oh, that's honestly so cool of you. What is downloading? Something's downloading on my phone. I didn't ask. I didn't ask for that.

[Kai]

Has Spotify given you free Spotify yet?

[Drew]

No, because they hate me.

[Kai]

Yeah, they give me free Spotify, actually.

[Drew]

I think they do, but it's for my dad's Spotify.

[Kai]

Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Drew]

My dad has. Uses my Spotify, dude. I literally give so much money to streaming services. I'm like, I'm a cog in the machine. I'm literally. No one's talking about.

[Kai]

I'm keeping Spotify alive.

[Drew]

Yeah, I am keeping media as we know it alive with my multiple subscriptions of 12 to $20 a month.

[Kai]

You know, I have, like, the rich get richer mentality when it comes to streaming services because I just use everybody else's. And then Kai, every once in a while, kick me out of his.

[Drew]

I know he'd be changing the password. I just had to sign up for HBO Max, because I was like, oh, my God, I can't Ask. I was like, I can't ask.

[Kai]

I can't ask again.

[Josiah]

Why?

[Kai]

I, like, I just got on my sisters.

[Josiah]

I like, providing for you guys.

[Drew]

Don't fucking talk to me like that. Sorry.

[Kai]

Why did that give me chills?

[Drew]

Oh, well, I haven't been finding a lot of, like, new, like, super interesting music because, like, new music has been coming out from, like, artists right now that I've just been listening to. Like, there was a Drake album, and now there's the Brent Fies out bomb, which is honestly not what I wanted it to be. But I'm going to still listen and skip past.

[Kai]

You still listen a lot. Like, it's still, like.

[Drew]

Because, like, they're still like, I need that kick in my brain that his other album gave me. And I. I will. Like, I will get to the bottom of it, but literally the singles are the best songs. And then Addictions is good, but I don't like the feature.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

And then I've still been on, like, an Aventura kick. Like, I've just been hella listening to the Love and Hate album, and that's kind of it. Like, that's literally all I've been listening to.

[Kai]

It's. It's so true. Like, she all, like, Strictly has been listening to those, like, four songs out the Brent Bias album.

[Drew]

Yeah. And you know what? If it's what's gonna get me through the week, sometimes you don't have to be niche.

[Kai]

Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do, you know?

[Drew]

And I don't watch movies anymore.

[Kai]

I'm gonna tap into Mac DeMarco tonight just to see what it sounds like to my adult brain. Because when I was, like, 16, 17.

[Drew]

You still might like it, because it's like, when you like something that much is like a child. Like, it's. It always sounds like.

[Kai]

Chambers of Reflection was the best song I had ever heard. Reflections?

[Drew]

That song? No, there's a Mac DeMarco song that literally just reminds me of the one time I got high for the first time, and then I thought the heat lamp was melting the skin off my back.

[Kai]

Oh, yeah.

[Drew]

I don't know if I've said that story.

[Kai]

I think we talked about it. We played with, like, tampons or pads and, like, the entire time.

[Drew]

And then I went to go brush my teeth, and we were in, like, Seattle and it was really cold and I didn't know what heated light bulbs were. So I was standing in the bathroom and the light bulb above me was a. Yeah, I was high as fuck. And the heated Light bulb was above me and I felt it burning the back of my neck. And I was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And I freaked out and I took a shower, but I couldn't finish my shower because there was a heated light bulb in the shower above me. And I thought I was burnt. My skin was burning alive. So I just got out covered in soap and wet and laid in bed and listened to Mac DeMarco and Gorillaz and, like, fell asleep.

[Kai]

Yeah. Damn. That was, like, one of the last times I ever had fun high.

[Drew]

No, the last time you had fun high is when I had a panic attack. And, you know Ryan got Taco Bell.

[Kai]

Yeah, that Taco Bell was legendary. Maybe I try. I've, like, I've said this before, but there's, like, a moment in my life where like, after like, six or seven or eight months, maybe even like a year or two, like, after the last time I smoked weed, I get this, like, like, primal, deep urge around. Like, I have to smoke weed. I have to, like, I have to do it. I just need to do it once and get it over with. And, like, it's sneaking up on me because, like, there have been a few times where I'm like, I think I'm going to drink a can.

[Drew]

Yeah, I know you've been saying maybe you try with just me and Orion around.

[Kai]

Yeah.

[Drew]

Like, because I think that also might be it. Because I couldn't get high for a long time unless it was just me and Orion. And, like, then I was able to get high around you. And, like, then it, like, creeped out into the rest of the group. But I think it's like, you have to, like, find the place for grounding. You have to be grounded with your girls.

[Kai]

Yeah, I need my girly pops to.

[Drew]

I'm going to fucking hit you in the fucking face.

[Kai]

God. Okay, we'll just end it there. Bye, guys.

[Drew]

It.