If you've ever missed someone you knew was wrong for you, waited for closure that never came, or just needed someone to tell you the truth about healing... this one's for you.

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Breakups are messy. The grief hits you in waves, the anger blindsides you at random moments, and somewhere in the middle of it all, you find yourself missing someone you know was completely wrong for you. If any of that sounds familiar, this episode is for you.

Dr. Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt is a board-certified health psychologist, author and no-bullshit self-help expert who joined us on Even Tacos Fall Apart to talk about her book Getting to Good Riddance: A No-Bullshit Breakup Survival Guide. She wrote it during COVID lockdown, at least partly because so many of her clients were coming in saying they were done... all that togetherness pushed a lot of people right to the edge.

So what's the biggest piece of bullshit people tell themselves after a breakup? According to Dr. Jodie, it's the self-blame spiral. Replaying everything you did wrong, convinced it was all your fault. The truth is, most relationships fail because of two people. And while accountability matters, flogging yourself endlessly is less accountability and more pain with no payoff.

We also get into why "good riddance" is more useful than chasing closure. Closure sounds great, but the reality is you might never get it. Good riddance reframes the whole thing: this relationship wasn't right for you, and you deserve better... or at least different.

Dr. Jodie recommends giving yourself six to eight months to heal before dating again... and that clock doesn't start until you go no contact. Still texting every day? You haven't actually broken up yet. The no-contact rule is extremely practical. You can't clear your head when you're constantly stirring the pot!

We also talk about the role anger plays in healing (spoiler: Dr. Jodie actually loves the anger phase, it's energizing!), why following your ex on social media is actively working against you, and how to rebuild your identity when a long-term relationship has quietly swallowed it whole. One of the most powerful tools she recommends is expressive writing... there's real neuroscience behind it, and it helps you reconnect with who you were before the relationship defined you.

And if you're wondering when to bail on a relationship that isn't working yet, Dr. Jodie gets into that too, including a thoughtful, honest conversation about abusive relationships and why "just leave" is advice that completely misses the reality of what people are dealing with.

Her top piece of advice, straight from the episode: Why the hell do you want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you?

It's a good question. This episode helps you sit with it... and eventually, answer it.