A Parade of Jerk-Offs

Summary

Everything Is Fine - Episode: A Parade of Jerk-Offs
Release Date: January 27, 2025
Hosts: Jennifer Romolini and Kim France

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Introduction

In this candid and introspective episode of Everything Is Fine, hosts Jennifer Romolini and Kim France delve deep into the myriad challenges and liberating moments that come with navigating life after 40. Titled "A Parade of Jerk-Offs," the episode touches on themes of moving homes, dealing with middle-age labels, self-care, and maintaining one's identity amidst societal expectations.

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1. The Emotional Toll of Moving

Jen Romolini opens the discussion by sharing her recent experience of moving homes. She vividly describes the physical pain and emotional strain involved in the process.

Jen Romolini [01:20]:
"The next time I move, I better be rich enough to pay somebody to fucking do everything. Cause I am too old for this shit."

Despite the hardships, Jen emphasizes the positive aspects of relocating, such as shaking up one's routine and the opportunity to create a more harmonious living space.

Jen Romolini [01:55]:
"I couldn’t conceive of something better because I was so trapped, holding on to the old thing."

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2. Embracing Middle Age

The hosts transition into a heartfelt conversation about the societal labels attached to middle age. Both Jen and Kim express their frustration with being categorized as "middle-aged," especially when they feel vibrant and anything but.

Kim France [03:37]:
"We're going to be so much happier here. Cause the space works better, our furniture looks better. It's just a better thing."

They discuss the importance of redefining what it means to be middle-aged on their own terms, rather than succumbing to external labels.

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3. Self-Care and Mental Health

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to self-care practices. Jen shares her newfound habit of walking her dog without headphones to stay more mindful and connected to her surroundings.

Jen Romolini [14:46]:
"Just to kind of like be a little bit more alert to the world around me and mindful."

Kim echoes similar sentiments, highlighting the benefits of engaging in activities that promote mental well-being away from screens and daily stresses.

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4. Coping with External Stressors

The conversation shifts to broader societal issues, including political tensions and environmental disasters. Jen and Kim emphasize the importance of community involvement and supporting one another during tumultuous times.

Jen Romolini [23:16]:
"Don't turn on us for anything we say today, please. Just, just make nice today, please. We love you so much and we just. We can't handle it today."

They advocate for maintaining a positive and supportive environment within their community, despite the chaos unfolding in the world.

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5. Navigating Beauty Standards and Aging

A playful yet honest discussion ensues about beauty standards and the pressures women face as they age. Jen candidly talks about her decision to undergo liposuction on her double chin, expressing her frustration with societal expectations.

Jen Romolini [17:35]:
"I'm going to get liposuction on my double chin. Because I can't look at my double chin one more day."

Kim engages in this dialogue by sharing her own experiences and the challenges of maintaining personal style without adhering to conventional beauty norms.

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6. Listener Questions and Community Engagement

The hosts engage with listener questions, providing advice on various topics ranging from beauty treatments to maintaining mental health during challenging times. They emphasize authenticity and the importance of supporting one another.

Jen Romolini [35:14]:
"I just know, but I don't know about ones that don't mess up your hair."

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7. Reflections on Happiness and the U-Curve of Life

Towards the end of the episode, Jen and Kim reflect on their personal growth and the concept of the U-curve of happiness, which suggests that happiness peaks in early adulthood, dips in middle age, and rises again in later years. They share their optimism about the future and the continual improvement of their lives.

Jen Romolini [42:36]:
"My 50s were so much better than my 40s. My 60s feel better than my 50s so far."

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Conclusion

"A Parade of Jerk-Offs" is a heartfelt exploration of the complexities of life after 40. Through honest conversations, personal anecdotes, and relatable humor, Jennifer Romolini and Kim France create a space for women to navigate the challenges of middle age with grace, resilience, and a touch of irreverence. The episode underscores the importance of community, self-care, and redefining societal labels to embrace one's true self.

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Notable Quotes

• Jen Romolini [01:20]:
  "The next time I move, I better be rich enough to pay somebody to fucking do everything. Cause I am too old for this shit."

• Jen Romolini [01:55]:
  "I couldn’t conceive of something better because I was so trapped, holding on to the old thing."

• Kim France [03:37]:
  "We're going to be so much happier here. Cause the space works better, our furniture looks better. It's just a better thing."

• Jen Romolini [14:46]:
  "Just to kind of like be a little bit more alert to the world around me and mindful."

• Jen Romolini [17:35]:
  "I'm going to get liposuction on my double chin. Because I can't look at my double chin one more day."

• Jen Romolini [42:36]:
  "My 50s were so much better than my 40s. My 60s feel better than my 50s so far."

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Final Thoughts

This episode serves as both a guide and a companion for women navigating the transition into their 40s and beyond. Through laughter, vulnerability, and practical advice, Jen and Kim offer listeners the reassurance that "everything is fine" even amidst life's inevitable challenges.

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Transcript

[Marc Maron]

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[Kim France]

Hey, folks, it's Marc Maron from wtf. I've been talking to all kinds of famous people in my garage since 2009, including a sitting president. You know, I don't imagine you were flying in here on the chopper thinking, like, you know, I am nervous about Mark. No, I wasn't. Okay, well, that's good. That would be a problem. It would be a problem if the president was feeling stressed about it coming to my garage. Coming to your garage. And now there's even more wtf when you subscribe to the full Marin to get weekly bonus content and all WTF episodes ad free. Listen to WTF wherever you get podcasts. And subscribe to the full [e-mail] WTF?

[Marc Maron]

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[Jen Romolini]

Hi and welcome to Everything Is Fine, a podcast for women over 40. We are your hosts. I'm Kim France.

[Marc Maron]

And I am Jen Romelini and Jen Romolini.

[Jen Romolini]

You just moved. You moved yesterday.

[Marc Maron]

I really did, Kim France. I really did. Let me tell you something. The next time I move, I better be rich enough to pay somebody to fucking do everything. Cause I am too old for this shit. I am Danny Glover in Lethal Weapon. I mean, my fingertips hurt, my balls of my feet hurt. We had movers. But you're still moving shit. You're just moving and moving and moving and taping up boxes. And I have like, we did like a wound check. Alex and I, we were just like, bleeding at different points. Like, just like hands getting sliced and like, I mean, I'm. I mean. And then the aftermath is like, you just live in, like Boxland Boxville for weeks. But I will say I think it's really good to shake up one's routine and move. Just not be afraid to let go. Like, I was in the house, the old house yesterday, and I was like, this place is a fucking dump. Like, I did a lot of good, cute things to it, but the bones of it, it's foundationally just a piece of shit, like, run by a slumlord. And like, I was so desperate to hold onto this thing that, like, was a piece of shit. Like, this space is so much better for us. We're going to be so much. Like, I can just feel energetically we're gonna be happier here. Cause the space works better, our furniture looks better. Like, it's just a better thing. But I couldn't conceive of something better because I was so trapped, holding on to the old thing.

[Jen Romolini]

Well, we don't always realize what we're oppressed by till we're not oppressed by it anymore.

[Marc Maron]

That's it. That's it. I mean, look, speaking of oppression, I moved on Inauguration day.

[Jen Romolini]

The.

[Marc Maron]

Those fucking fucks.

[Jen Romolini]

Oh my God. Like, I know.

[Marc Maron]

Why have money if you're gonna look that miserable? Like, like they just all look fucking miserable. They dressed miserably, like Handmaid's Tale fucking fashion. Like they all looked awful. I was just like, what are you doing? Like, they all looked austere and like, you know, it was really just a fun. It was a parade of just jerk offs.

[Jen Romolini]

I'm impressed that you watched it. I kept the TV off all day.

[Marc Maron]

I did not watch it. This is totally a like opening the New York Times app or whatever. Like as my day was going on and I was moving, I was like, whoa, look at that fucking outfit. Or like being on Instagram and having someone like make a direct one to one comparison of Ivanka and like the main lady from A Handmaid's Tale, like, same color, same neckline, same, like cut everything. It was like almost as if they were, you know, it was intentional. Who gives a shit? I don't give a shit. I'm gonna keep, you know, organizing, supporting people. I've really felt very heartened watching what LA has been able to do for each other. Like watching what communities in LA have been able to do and lift each other up. And I'm just like, a lot of things happen on the community level. That's where things actually happen. And fuck him. I so feel like, fuck him this time. I don't want to pay attention to every little fucking sign of the pen. I'm just like, fuck him. Fuck him. Fuck him. Fuck him. Fuck off. Fuck him.

[Jen Romolini]

Yep, I kind of feel the same way. I kind of feel the same way. And I do think the key is to have some kind of involvement on the local level with something you care about, you know? I do. I don't know what that thing is going to be for me yet, but it's going to be something.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, yeah, same, same. Well, I now have like a really good entertaining house. Like once I get. House, house. Philly, what's up? As soon as I get this, this like giant sofa that I ordered, which is my big splurge of the move in. It's like an 8 by 10 sectional. I can't wait. It's like a cloud. It's amazing. I hope it's as amazing as it seemed in the showroom.

[Jen Romolini]

Is it, is it an L shaped sectional or is it a U shaped sectional?

[Marc Maron]

U seemed a little funky to me. I looked at some U's. It's an L. I was just like, that's not going to be right. It's an L. It's an L shaped sectional, but it's got very deep cushions. It's like the kind of thing that you can really. I think it's going to be one of those sofas that you get in and you don't want to get out, which I have, I've never had. I have. I've just never lived a life for comfort in any way. And like, I was looking at like, things in my house and I'm like, why did I buy that shit? Like, who was I trying to impress with this uncomfortable, designy object? A, you know, like, yeah, it's not nice to be in, you know.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

So trying to make a very comfortable house. But, but to that end, in terms of organizing, I will have a home where you can very much have a lot of people in it. People could sit down at a table, people can sit down on a sofa. And I'm like, oh, I could have like community meetings here if I. If, you know, if, if it was a, if it was a thing once I get there. I mean, once we unpack. Every. Once we unpack the 400 boxes in this house, I can't even find my toothbrush. Like, you know.

[Jen Romolini]

No, man, that's just where it is. When I move, I find that whatever I don't unpack immediately, like within the first week just stays. Like, I've still got a box that's unpacked.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, 100%. Well, I was trying to not pack those things. As discussed. This is the packing podcast now. This is the packing and moving podcast. Wait, when was the last time you moved? How long have you been in your place?

[Jen Romolini]

Since 2021.

[Marc Maron]

Okay, so not so four years.

[Jen Romolini]

Four years.

[Marc Maron]

Four years. So that's not that long ago that you still have like a visceral memory of moving.

[Jen Romolini]

I still have a pretty visceral memory of moving, but what I have done is I've realized recently is accumulated the amount of shit that will make my next move a pain in the ass.

[Marc Maron]

Oh.

[Jen Romolini]

You know, like I've just realized, like, oh, it's time for a real, like a real clean out.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah. I felt, I felt very much like when I was watching all of my clothes in all the many wardrobe boxes, you know, I was like, why do I have this many clothes like a person should? A person doesn't need this many clothes. That's a big thing. And it still is. It is like a wardrobe for a person. I am not, but maybe sometimes am.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

You know, like dressy clothes.

[Jen Romolini]

I just wear. You know, I thought it was interesting. Someone said during the fires, when you're evacuating, the clothes you need to take are the clothes in your laundry bin.

[Marc Maron]

That's what I saw. I saw that too. That was really interesting.

[Jen Romolini]

I feel like I may have even said that last week.

[Marc Maron]

Oh, I think you did.

[Jen Romolini]

I only wear such a small fraction of my clothes. Such a small fraction. And then I hang on to things. Cause I think, oh, but maybe I. I'll have that life again.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah. Well, what if I got a job where I had to go into the office? That's not happening. And if I did have that job, I'd want new clothes for it. I don't wanna pull out old dusty zara blouse from 2019. Yeah, I gave a lot of suiting away.

[Jen Romolini]

I just put a bunch of clothes, like, nice clothes, two boxes of clothes I sent out to my friend in LA to give to people.

[Marc Maron]

Oh, that was nice. Yeah, that was good. Yeah, I've been doing a lot of that. It was actually a good time to move because there were a lot of, like, organizations, like, small ones that needed very specific things that I happened to have, like, black hoodies and vans. And I was like, I have both. Here you are. Those vans were a mistake, et cetera. Anyway, I hope this isn't echoey. I. I've just been moving. Like, I've just was moving. I think I watched a show or two. This might be an all listener questions. I don't know what you have. Like, I've just been moving. I have nothing to talk about. There's the politics show that I'm not interested in talking about. There's. I don't know what the fuck else. What else?

[Jen Romolini]

What else? It's fucking freezing here. It's fucking freezing here.

[Marc Maron]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[Jen Romolini]

It's the weather podcast now. We've. We've transitioned from the moving to the weather podcast. Yeah, it's. It's so miserably cold out here. Yeah, I'm angry about it.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah. Yeah. There is that moment that you get like that, that you're just like, I can't. But you're going to Mexico. Where are you going in Mexico?

[Jen Romolini]

We're going to this resort in Cancun.

[Marc Maron]

Okay. All right.

[Jen Romolini]

I was like, I Want a hotel room with a plunge pool?

[Marc Maron]

Wow. Okay. That's fun.

[Jen Romolini]

That was what I wanted. I wanted a room that felt like a room that felt pretty private with its own plunge pool. So that's what we got.

[Marc Maron]

So you don't have to. So because you don't want to go down to the main pool? No, I don't.

[Jen Romolini]

I'll go down to the main pool on the beach. But it's just. I went on a vacation with a friend a few years ago. She took me with her to St. Lucia, and she had a villa. It was beautiful. A villa with a plunge pool. And it's just kind of cool. You're hanging out before breakfast. Pop in the pool.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, that is fun. I mean, that's why I often get Airbnbs, like, especially with a kid and everything. I just want, if I can get an Airbnb, like in Palm Springs and like an affordable Airbnb with its own pool, I'm like, that is so preferable. Then you can just be like a person going to a pool. Like, you just be like a weirdo going to a pool instead of being like, oh, I'm a buttoned up lady going to a pool.

[Jen Romolini]

Pool, exactly.

[Marc Maron]

You know, like. Because then it's like a complicated thing. It's like, you know, everything has to be shaved and you have to, like, just be like. You have to look, like, presentable at the pool.

[Jen Romolini]

You have to press that.

[Marc Maron]

I want to be a slob.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah, no, me too.

[Marc Maron]

I want to be a pool slob.

[Jen Romolini]

Me too. So the plunge pool, I think, will allow me to be a bit of a pool slob.

[Marc Maron]

I think it will. I think it will. You're going to eat good food, you're going to have nice margaritas. It's going to be fun. I wonder how everybody else is escaping this winter of our discontent.

[Jen Romolini]

Oh, I don't know, man. I mean, we, you know, I never take vacations like this. I never take, like, beach vacations.

[Marc Maron]

No, no, you don't. That's not your thing.

[Jen Romolini]

It's not my thing. It's nothing against it, obviously, since I'm doing one, but it's just not something I ever do. But I am really looking forward to, like, not bringing anything but caftans with me.

[Marc Maron]

That's nice. That'll be fun.

[Jen Romolini]

And just hanging out, that's amazing.

[Marc Maron]

I am the opposite of just hanging out. I'm gonna be unpacking boxes. I have to write. I have a 5,000 word word count. I have to meet every month for this novel. I'M writing. And how many words do you think I've written so far this month?

[Jen Romolini]

498.

[Marc Maron]

0. Absolutely. I haven't even opened a file. I haven't even written the words that say, you know, future. Novel. File.

[Jen Romolini]

Novel. T.K.

[Marc Maron]

Exactly. Novel. T.K. nothing. It hasn't done nothing. And I'm going to. I'm going to do it. It's the 21st today. I got 10 days. I'm going to do it. I. I have been working it out sort of in my head. Yeah, I've been working it out a little bit in my head. I have an accountability partner who I have. I'm going to be meeting with once a week. So, yeah, I'm excited about that project and I've started to, like. I'm starting to write it in my mind. I will say the one good thing about packing is I forget which psychologist, therapist, whomever says this, but, like, sort of mindless time when you are just doing an activity, you're not on your phone, you're not really, like, going for a walk by yourself, doing the dishes, folding laundry. All of those things are really good for the brain, apparently. And I will say, being away from screens and having to do tasks, for the past month, my brain has been working in a different way because I just haven't been like, oh, scroll, scroll, scroll. You know, I've had such limited time with my phone because I had to do things. So I think that that's. It's helped. It's been good for my creativity, actually. In some ways. I haven't actually executed anything, but I can see, like, my brain wants to be working.

[Jen Romolini]

No, it's percolating. There's such thing as a percolating time.

[Marc Maron]

That's right. That's right.

[Jen Romolini]

I've been, you know, thinking about. What's her name? Writer's walks.

[Marc Maron]

Oh, Julia. Julia. What the hell? Wait, why can't I think of her name? Julia. Oh, God, that's so annoying to have to, like, look things up this much. It's just.

[Jen Romolini]

I know.

[Marc Maron]

It's just. It's just annoying.

[Jen Romolini]

Julia Cameron. Julia Cameron.

[Marc Maron]

Thank you. It was on the tip of my tongue.

[Jen Romolini]

Julia Cameron. You know, she has these things called artist walks. And you're supposed to go for a walk, and you're not supposed to bring the dog, and you're not supposed to listen to headphones. You're just supposed to go for a walk. So toward that end, Baby steps. Toward that end, I've been walking the dog without my headphones in in the morning.

[Marc Maron]

Oh, wow, that's good.

[Jen Romolini]

Just to kind of like be a little bit more alert to the world around me and mindful.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jen Romolini]

So far it hasn't really made a difference one way or another, but. But it's one. It's my new small thing I'm doing.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah. I mean, I think morning pages work. I want to. I want to. Once I have a. Once I'm sitting at a desk that isn't a folding table, I would like to get back into morning pages. But, you know, whatever, whatever. You just have to have a regular practice of something. I really don't know. I really don't know anything today. I'm physically and mentally very tired because also we had a really seamless move. It was very tight. The movers were great, by the way. Los Angeles, if anybody needs movers. Rock and roll movers. They were the best movers I've ever had. But like, it took a lot of logistics to get there and it was a lot of like, you know, it was a lot of like checklists and just constant task doing and problem solving and I'm. I really should have the week off after this, but that's not the way our capitalist society works, so.

[Jen Romolini]

No, no, no, no. It's just not. I know we're both a little off today, but it's gonna have to be okay.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, it's gonna have to be okay. It's gonna have to be okay. Yeah, we're a little. We're both a little off. Like, if I really wanted to, if we kept talk, if we really kept. I could just cry.

[Jen Romolini]

I know. I feel the same way. I could.

[Marc Maron]

I could just have like a 10 minute like good cry, but like still holding it together. Like there's just. The world is fucking terrifying and like it's like there's so much going on and it's just like, okay, but just have to keep going. Let's talk about fucking packing storage solutions.

[Jen Romolini]

I know. Well, should we listen to some listener questions?

[Marc Maron]

Yes, we should. You should listen to me read them. Yes. Okay.

[Jen Romolini]

I'm sorry. See, I'm not myself today.

[Marc Maron]

It's okay. We're doing it. We're doing it. We're doing it, but we're doing it also. I just saying this because I always like to say this. I know that people are far more impacted by everything that's going on in the world. I am very terrified for people in the world. I know that I have immense privilege to be able to talk about moving and movers and my own fatigue. Like I just Want to always check my privilege. And there it is. There's the check on my white privilege. Okay.

[Jen Romolini]

I would say you haven't been living a very privileged life out there in the land of fires and duty, comparatively. I mean, I appreciate. I appreciate the gesture. I'm just saying it's not like you haven't been through some shit lately. That's all I'm saying.

[Marc Maron]

I've been through some shit. But, you know, you don't. You have to. It's always. You have to always put it in perspective.

[Jen Romolini]

Oh, by the way, I am going to get liposuction on my double chin.

[Marc Maron]

You're gonna get liposuction? That's the. That's the choice.

[Jen Romolini]

Well, because that sounds like the most. The least invasive thing to do, and I can't look at my double chin one more day.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah. I mean. Cause there's double chin things you can do. There's three. There's Kybella.

[Jen Romolini]

You could do painful, right?

[Marc Maron]

No, not painful, just weird.

[Jen Romolini]

Oh, it's the one that gives you a goiter.

[Marc Maron]

That gives you. But temporary. A goiter for like, a couple of days. Couple of days. Goiter. Like a bullfrog. But then it, like, melts all the fat. But the thing is, I don't know what happens to the skin if it melts the fat. That is the problem. Because I've had people like. I've had people be like, you should never have gotten that. Because I had coolsculpting done on my double chin, and it really did give me a much better profile. But I've had people be like, you need fat as you age. You should never burn fat off. You should never. So I don't know. I'll go talk to somebody. I have a friend who's 60 who went into the dermatologist and was like, she was finally ready. She was like, give me the works. Give me it all. Like, after not really doing anything. And they were like, yeah, no, your face. You can't hold filler. Your face is not gonna hold filler. And Botox is not gonna work. You need surgery.

[Jen Romolini]

Wow.

[Marc Maron]

And I was like, I don't believe that. I think a little, like, collagen stimulating filler, like, radius would actually work. I don't believe that. Like, go to another person. Because I think radius is actually. It's like, $1,800. Not that I'm saying that's cheap, but it's $1,800, and it's a bio stimulator, and they put it in places like your jowls like, or your. Wherever they put it. And it stimulates collagen in that area, but it also gives you more fullness. Like, I think. I think that she should go to another person. But that is a real thing. Like, that. The people have told me, like, they go in especially for Botox, and the person's like, yeah, you waited too long.

[Jen Romolini]

No, it's too late.

[Marc Maron]

It's too late for you.

[Jen Romolini]

Oh, my God.

[Marc Maron]

Too late.

[Jen Romolini]

Oh, my God.

[Marc Maron]

It's so. It's like, well, at that point, just like, be like, okay, I'm just. I'm just agent. Who gives a shit?

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah, I know. I'm against. I'm against in general surgery. That's unnecessary. But I can't look at this double chin much longer. I just can't.

[Marc Maron]

I get it. I get it. I get it. I mean, while you're there, what else are you going to. I mean, like, if I was going.

[Jen Romolini]

To do one thing, I'm like, I know, I know.

[Marc Maron]

And you're going to. If I'm getting the anesthesia, I'm like, just fucking do it all. But then you're gonna have the recovery.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah, the recovery.

[Marc Maron]

So, yeah, there's coolsculpting. There's Kybella, where they shoot you with the acid that eats the fat. Just like acid in your stomach eats fat of, like, a hamburger. There's Kybella, which is. I don't know. Some people do that. My doctor told me when I was thinking about that, that it actually would tighten. Not only would it melt the fat, but it would tighten up and actually give you kind of a neck lift. A mini neck lift. Yes, that's what she told me. But I don't know if that. That was when I was, like, 44. So I think it. I think as anatomy changes, it changes.

[Jen Romolini]

Right?

[Marc Maron]

I hate talking about this shit. I always feel bad talking about it. Like, the truth is, I love talking about it. Like, I love. I could talk about, like, if somebody wanted to be like, let's talk about eye jobs, I would be like, yes, let's discuss. But I feel so, like, sick inside that first off, I know so much about it. And second off, like, it's disgusting. Like, we should just be able to age.

[Jen Romolini]

We should be able to age. And pro tip, I probably won't get liposuction in my. That'll probably never happen. But I like talking about it. I like picturing a world where, like, I go in, I get. My double chin disappeared. It just.

[Marc Maron]

No. Yeah.

[Jen Romolini]

No, but what about those things that I see ads for in my feeds that say that are like the massagers for your neck that say that they're gonna get rid of your double chin. That's all bullshit, right?

[Marc Maron]

It's not bullshit, but it's like extraordinarily, like painfully temporary. It's like you see the effect immediately after and then your face goes back. So I guess if you were doing it all day long, it would be.

[Jen Romolini]

Fine if that was just when you met people and went to meetings. You were doing it all the time.

[Marc Maron]

Exactly. Just all the time. No, I. I will say because I've been doing. I've been reporting a lot of stories about wrinkles lately. And you know, whatever the thing, I, I recently gained 10 pounds. Like not recently, but over the course of the last. Since I've been able to eat again and my stomach's been pretty much, I've gained about 10 pounds. Best thing for wrinkles in the world. Yeah, Nothing like it.

[Jen Romolini]

No, absolutely, absolutely. It's your face or your ass.

[Marc Maron]

It just is nothing. Like all the like fine lines in my cheeks gone. Like just everything just like just gaining weight.

[Jen Romolini]

Yep, yep. No, it's true, it's true. Like, you know. Yeah, I was gonna name a person as an example of that, but then I changed my mind and decided to be nice. Cause that would sound mean.

[Marc Maron]

Well, no, this is why people are going into the dermatologist for ozempic phase. Because what happens is you lose all this weight. Now you have this. You have this crazy hollowed out wrinkly face where you had like a, like a nice plump face before and a lot of fat to work with now you've just got these hollows and this is not the way a face should be. But whatever. Everybody. We're not even supposed to talk about bodies or anything. I don't give a shit. Somebody's gonna add us in some comment thread. Somebody's gonna turn on us on the Facebook. Sorry.

[Jen Romolini]

Don't turn on us for anything we say today, please. Just, just make nice today, please. We love you so much and we just. We can't handle it today.

[Marc Maron]

We can handle it. Whatever we can handle.

[Jen Romolini]

What am I saying? Well, they love you.

[Marc Maron]

You're fine. You're out of it today. It's okay. I love you, okay? And they're gonna love us. It's fine. Or they won't. Whatever. We're middle aged cunts. Like, I don't know what to tell you.

[Jen Romolini]

And there's the headline for the episode.

[Marc Maron]

There it is. That is it. This is the second cunt headline in A month. Let's take a quick break from some ads. And we're back. Okay, how are you as podcasters and media influencers gag handling this delicate inflection point? Just look at the list of comments in this thread. There used to be a fun podcast group where people looked for suggestions for genes that don't rise up under your boobs or to hear trusted advice on chemical peels versus traditional exfoliation methods. Now every third comment is asking on your advice on how to survive the apocalypse. Can a media brand such as yours. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, listener. I'm dying.

[Jen Romolini]

That's funny.

[Marc Maron]

Survive as a trusted source of advice on these fun, frivolous things that we love and you do so well? Or does every single thing have to be about politics now? Or as just one listener and fan, I gotta say, I have enough of the how to survive the apocalypse in my other feeds. And we'll crave what this used to be and will need to be more than ever. You two very talented ladies sure have a difficult road ahead in this tricky time. You know what? Or we don't. Or we fucking don't. Or we're like. We're two nimrods who talk about fucking our double chins.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah. I mean, I sort of feel like the Facebook page is very much a reflection of what's going on in everybody's lives. And so, of course, you know, on the week leading up to the inauguration, there's gonna be a lot of business about that, you know, the same way there was a lot of business about the fires when the fires happened. And I think that it's just gonna be part. It's part of the nature of a group like that. And the same thing's true for us on the show, you know.

[Marc Maron]

That's right. That's right. But perhaps it's time to remind listeners that we don't know shit. Like, so when, like, there are certainly, like middle aged ladies out there who are just dispensing all kinds of immaculate advice. That's not gonna be us. Like when somebody asks, how are we surviving the next four years? We're smoking lots of weed and complaining like that's what's happening.

[Jen Romolini]

And the occasional cigarette.

[Marc Maron]

And the occasional cigarette, though. Somebody thinks I'm back to smoking. Someone's disappointed that I'm back to smoking. Like, it really has. This, this. This particular listener who just wrote this question is not wrong that the Facebook group has been very intense. It has been very intense. I've thought about reminding everyone what a Difficult time this is. And that we need to be gentle with each other. And so you can, you can take this as a reminder. But basically, we're gonna be doing the same shit we've always done, you know, in the, in the apocalypse. Like, you know, it's like, what's the phrase? Like, worry for tomorrow. Like, you know, whatever. I don' the thing is, I don't know. I don't know any better than anybody else does. We're not the experts.

[Jen Romolini]

No, we're not the experts. And because we're not the experts, this will remain an amusing podcast. I really think it will. We're not going to get all. It's not going to be about politics all the time, but it can't not be about politics some of the time.

[Marc Maron]

That's right. There we go. That's exactly right. I hope that answers your question. I plan on continuing to talk about Genesis like that is the thing. I'm not gonna let him take my life away from me. I'm not. I'm not letting him take my frivolous, stupid shit away from me.

[Jen Romolini]

Yep, that's it.

[Marc Maron]

Okay, and on that note, do silky scarves peg us as.

[Jen Romolini]

You're funny.

[Marc Maron]

Do silky scarves peg us as, quote, old? Should I get rid of them? I think I own dozens in all colors and fabrics. I think they're amazing and I think you should wear them forever. I think you're going to look very French. I think silky scarves are incredible with a trench coat. I think they look incredible with a button down shirt. I think they look. I love an ascot. I love a silky scarf. I love them all. I don't care. Make me look old. I look exactly the kind of old I want to be in a silky scarf.

[Jen Romolini]

I have nothing to add to that. No notes.

[Marc Maron]

All right, fantastic. Okay. What's your go to cozy outfit at home when no one sees you?

[Jen Romolini]

My answer is so boring.

[Marc Maron]

Go ahead.

[Jen Romolini]

I have a couple of pairs of sweatpants from a brand called Alala that I wear. I usually just wear a button down or a sweatshirt.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, yeah. Okay. All right. I have a checkered, a navy and white checked J. Crew boys sweatsuit that has. It's like size 18, I think they go up to. So it's a large boy and it has such a sag in the front that I finally was like, oh, that's for male genitals. That's why this. That's why this was designed like this. Yeah. So I wear that around the house and I would wear it out, but my husband has really been like. I don't know if those are outside pants.

[Jen Romolini]

We need that check in our lives.

[Marc Maron]

We do. And, like, because of the crotch bulge, it really is not. It is really not right for me in public, but I've still done it. And then also I'm obsessed with my brushed cashmere J. Crew cardigan, which I've been wearing way too much. Like, you know when you have, like, a nice piece of clothing and you wear it to do all, like, your animal things and you're like, what the fuck? Now this has lint on it. It is like oil from cooking. Like, you know, this is why we can't have nice things. That's a definite. That's mine.

[Jen Romolini]

Okay, that's yours.

[Marc Maron]

Yes. Who's an older woman outside your circle that you admire and why?

[Jen Romolini]

Well, since she just died. I'll say. Cecily Richardson.

[Marc Maron]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Cecile. Wasn't it? Cecile.

[Jen Romolini]

Cecile. I think you're right.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, yeah. That's. That Patti Smith. What is your. We've never had a Patti Smith conversation. I feel like you might not like Patti Smith.

[Jen Romolini]

You are correct.

[Marc Maron]

I don't like her as a. I don't like her as a musician, but I like her vibe as a person. Give me, give me.

[Jen Romolini]

It's just very arbitrary.

[Marc Maron]

Okay. It's just arbitrary.

[Jen Romolini]

It's just very arbitrary. And things I shouldn't say on this show.

[Marc Maron]

Okay. All right. Oh, wow. Well, I love stepping into a thicket.

[Jen Romolini]

No, I mean, I think she's obviously like an artist who's influenced a lot of people. I think she's a good citizen. I'm sure she's not a bad person. She's just not my cup of tea.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah. I just feel like as a person who wants to continue to make art into my. I mean, not that I'm. What am I making art now? But who wants to continue to make things and create things, like, into my old age. I think she's a good model for that. I think she's in. I think she's. I think she's interesting and obviously doesn't give a fuck. I love that she doesn't give a fuck. Doesn't seem to give a fuck about, you know, conventional beauty standards. Like, there's a lot of things about her that I. I also am a big fan of Charlotte Rampling.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

I have several that I'm not gonna remember. Jane Fonda also is, like an amazing aging icon just because the way she talks about things. But these are, like, high up icons. Like, I'd have To really. I'd have to give this more than the absolute zero second that I gave this answer to really to come up with some good ones and maybe we'll do that in a future episode. Thank you for this question, listener. How are you doing in Cali? I'm doing okay. And this was. It says for Jen, I'm doing okay in Cali. Like, the air seems to have cleared up. I have spent some time with my friends who have lost their homes and felt a lot of warmth and a lot of love. And I feel like I've been supporting people who need to be supported right now. And I've also really been reevaluating my relationship with stuff. And also, like, the sense of permanence in places and getting unstuck. Like, really, what is it to not unstuck, but what is it to have attachment to things and how do we start to think about our lives as grounded in community and stop caring so much about the stuff? So it's really. I've been really impressed with the people I know who are making their way through this with little kids and really the communities that are showing up for them, but also my friend's strength. My friend Colleen, who's just this amazing optimist, is just like, yep, there'll be some good things from this, too. And I was like, that's insane. Like, that's an insane. Like, I don't want to get into toxic positivity. But she was just like, yeah, it fucking sucks, but there'll be some good things from this too. And, like, you know, just the. The human spirit. I'm very impressed with the human spirit. And so, yeah, it's horrible that it happened, but I've been. It's actually made me really love LA in a way that I have never loved LA in the. In the 14 years I've been here. And I think that the reason for that, or 15 or whatever the fuck long I've been here, I think the reason for that is that LA feels like such a lonely place and it has felt very deeply connected in the last couple of weeks. Because, you know, even weather here, because there's no weather, there's never like a. Like, you know, you're all bitching about the cold right now. Like, there's a connection there. You're having a shared experience of something. You know, there's really. Not that I think there should be a natural disaster to have this, but there is something that feels very connected. Like, the communities feel very connected. And I don't know, I've Felt very connected in LA lately. So that's how I'm doing. Thank you for asking. Okay. I find this time of year rough, dreary weather, less light past the festivities of the holidays. I just get low energy. My bandwidth for socializing is lower. What works for you during these periods?

[Jen Romolini]

One thing I try to do and I don't do it on a day like today that's super gray and yucky. But every day that there's even any sun out, I'll make myself go out in the middle of the day. And I find that that helps just like getting some sun on your face. But I'm also really, having said that, I kind of like lean into it. I lean into the coziness, lean into the cold outside.

[Marc Maron]

Yes, yes. And I think you're right on both of those things. And I would just add like sometimes I'll just get involved in a project that I've been wanting to do for a while, you know, like contact papering the shelves or something. Like just get involved in something that's like not a screen.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

Cause it can be a very contemplative place at a time in a nice way, but not if you're doom scrolling. Do you take any vitamin supplements? I. E. Iron, vitamin D, vitamin B complex. Do you find they make a difference?

[Jen Romolini]

I have all sorts of gummies. You know, I've got my B12 gummies, I've got my like don't get a.

[Marc Maron]

Cold gummies I take and I haven't lately because honestly I don't know where they are. But I have a pretty rigid vitamin supplement regimen. I do take iron a couple times a week. I take vitamin D every day. I take vitamin B complex, I take fish oil and I do find they make a difference. I find they make a huge difference. Honestly, like if I don't take, if I don't take vitamin D, I start to get like weird numb feet and all kinds of things. I take magnesium at night. Yeah, I have a pretty serious vitamin and supplement regimen. Not serious, but I take a lot of them because I find they work and also because I've had the kind of blood work done where you can see where you're low in certain areas and had a doctor say I think you should take these supplements. So I don't take them willy nilly, let's say that. All right. Throwing out a light one. Best hats for frigid weather. That doesn't ruin your hair, especially bangs.

[Jen Romolini]

I don't know about not ruining your hair. That's a really Difficult little twist to throw in there.

[Marc Maron]

I know, I know. That one is. That is hard.

[Jen Romolini]

I mean, what hat doesn't fuck with your hair a little bit?

[Marc Maron]

It has to have like a looseness to it. It has to be like a loose beanie. I just got a loose beanie that. I just got a loose beanie. I don't know from where Vans actually makes a really good loose beanie. I think Carhartt beanies. They're not for me. They don't look right on my head. Never. But Vans actually makes a good beanie. And then I forget there's some other company that makes really good beanies that I'm totally not gonna remember. It's some Spanish company. But you need like a looser, a looser weave on the hat that'll still go over your head and stay on your head, but won't like tighten in and crunch in. But I don't know anything else you know about warm weather hats. You talk.

[Jen Romolini]

I just. I know, but I don't know about ones that don't mess up your hair.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, this is not a. This is a. That's. That's. That's. That was an add on. And that's. That's a. That's a hard. This is a hard puzzle.

[Jen Romolini]

There's this knitwear designer named Jo Gordon. I think she's maybe Scottish. And I order hats from her website, you know, every once in a while. And I like them. I like just a regular knit hat. Like a pointy little knit hat, you.

[Marc Maron]

Know, who makes really nice hats. But they're really expensive. Is because I know this because I was trying to replace one for a friend who I think lost hers and I know not think she lost hers in the fire. Is Susie Conde. Incredible hat. Like just an incredible beanie. Like a. Just exactly what you want.

[Jen Romolini]

Is this the one that was all rainbow colored?

[Marc Maron]

Maybe.

[Jen Romolini]

Do you know what I'm talking about? Susie Conde?

[Marc Maron]

I know exactly what you're talking about. Then maybe it's. But there's also ones that are not rainbow colored. But I think you're talking about that. That hat was fucking great looking. I couldn't justify it because I don't live in the cold weather. But that was a great looking hat.

[Jen Romolini]

I agree.

[Marc Maron]

That was a great looking hat. Okay, one last question. I don't even know what time it is. Oh, there. We've only been talking. This is a really. This is a bad one. We've only been talking for 30 minutes. No, not one last question.

[Jen Romolini]

No, we haven't. 41 minutes.

[Marc Maron]

41 minutes. That's right. It's been. Because it's over. Two recordings. That's right. Okay. I was like, shit, That's a really. That's a low dose podcast. Okay, okay. So. All right, so one last question. What year of your life was your favorite year?

[Jen Romolini]

That's hard.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, it is.

[Jen Romolini]

I would say a recent year. I don't know what year, but I would say some year since I moved into this place, since I met my husband, have been like, happy years.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, I really, you know, I had a good time, a really good time at 27. 27 was a big year for me. I had a really good time at 35. That was a big year for me. But I think the answer to this question is I think the years keep getting better. Like, I think that. I think there's a. I really do believe in the U curve of life. Like, that there is like a middle age dip that is really fucking depressing in your 40s. Like, there's just a real. And not especially. But also, if you're raising kids, that's a really hard time when you're parenting. And also if your friends are all raising kids, it's a lonely time if you're not parenting. Right.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah, I can speak to that. Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

Right. So I was thinking about this recently, and I've been not wanting to jinx it because I've been thinking about I'm going to be 52 in two months, less than two months. And I've been thinking I'm getting happier every year. I've been getting happier out of 50. Every year feels better. So I don't think that I have the year that was my favorite year yet, because I loved 50. 51 has been great. 51. Fucking. I put out a book. Like, it was amazing. Amazing year.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah. No, that's how I feel. That's how I feel. The recent years have been better years. And I do think that's because you can get happier.

[Marc Maron]

You can get happier. You're also just more grateful. Like, I feel. I feel I'm like, oh, my God. My. Like one of the things that's been happening as I've been walking around. I think I said this on a podcast recently where I've just been, like, really grateful that I can walk around like, oh, I can take these stairs. This is amazing. Like, I just think that things start to shift, and I do think it has a lot to do with raising kids. And then kid. The adjacencies of how much that impacts your social life, because, you know, Caring for small children. Like, let's say up until, you know, 13, 14, you're a different person.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

You're almost like, not even yourself. Like, I have a friend who went on some horrible trip. She had, like, clean out some dead person's house. And she was like, do you know that the drive there and the drive back was like. It was like a long road trip for her. Solo was like, some of the best time I've had in a long time. And I was like, that's weird. But it's like you remembered who you are because you were alone and you were navigating the world without small children.

[Jen Romolini]

Yep.

[Marc Maron]

And that impacts not only the direct caregivers, but their entire social networks because your friends are just not available.

[Jen Romolini]

Yeah.

[Marc Maron]

And they are again now. Like, there's. My friends are all, like, mostly all have teens, and it's like, oh, we can go out to dinner. We can leave the kid at home. The kid's doing something else. Like, you know, so, anyway, I believe in the U curve of middle age, and I think that I'm on the upswing. And I'm scared to even say it. I'm, like, knocking all the wood because I don't want to be jinxed, but I feel happier. And I know you do, too.

[Jen Romolini]

No, for sure I do. My 50s were so much better than my 40s. My 60s feel better than my 50s so far.

[Marc Maron]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, there's bumps in the road, but generally it's a better life, which is really the message. I mean, whatever anybody's going to say about. Should we talk about glycolic acid and genes, or should we be talking about the fall of the democracy? Really, I just want to talk about getting older and be in it for the commiseration, but also for the joy. There's not enough joy, and I think that that's what I'm going to be chasing in this administration anywhere I can find it. So that's it.

[Jen Romolini]

Good on Jen.

[Marc Maron]

There's the podcast. There we go.

[Jen Romolini]

There we go. That's what we have.

[Marc Maron]

That's what we have. Hey, thanks for listening to Everything is Fine. Everyone. We are your hosts. I'm Jen Romolini.

[Jen Romolini]

And I'm Kim France.

[Marc Maron]

If you like the show, please rate and review it across the platforms, especially Apple podcasts. It helps people find the show, and it makes a difference to something that I'm still not sure about of. If you want to support the show, I do know that this makes a difference. Please join our [e-mail] everythingisfine It's $3 a month. It helps us pay our editor. If you want to find Kim and Kim's excellent daily fashion and style advice and home style and all beauty and everything shopping advice, you can find kim on kim france.substack.com you can can find me for who knows what we're doing over there at jenromalini.substack.com you can find both of us for now. We're still on Facebook, everybody, and we're staying there for right now because we are too lazy and dumb to figure out another platform. I mean, that's the truth, right? Private and robust Facebook group. We are also on an Instagram if podcast. The show is mixed and edited by Natalie Rivera, a true American hero who deals with our every week. Is this on? Is this on? And we'll be back next week. Acast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend.

[Kim France]

Hey folks, it's Marc Maron from wtf. I've been talking to all kinds of famous people in my garage since 2009, including a sitting president. You know, I don't imagine you were flying in here on the chopper thinking like, you know, I am nervous about Mark. No, I wasn't. Okay, well, that's good. That would be a problem. It would be a problem if the president was feeling stressed coming to my garage. Coming to your garage. And now there's even more WTF when you subscribe to the full Marin to get weekly bonus content and all WTF episodes ad free. Listen to WTF wherever you get podcasts and subscribe to the full [e-mail] WTF.

[Marc Maron]

Acast helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com.