Everything’s Perfect…Except Grown-Up Halloween 🎃
Podcast: Everything’s Perfect
Hosts: Autumn Calabrese & Donald Stamper
Release Date: October 28, 2025
Episode Overview
This episode is a playful, unfiltered deep dive into the oddities and realities of celebrating Halloween as an adult. Autumn and Donald (in full, humorous costume) openly discuss the weird social pressures around grown-up Halloween, why some of the magic fades, and what aspects they still love—or love to hate. Through candid stories, hot cultural takes, and plenty of nostalgia (and shade at pumpkin spice!), this episode captures the real talk and laughter that define Everything’s Perfect.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Opening Costume Chaos and Confessions
- Both hosts show up in 80s-inspired workout costumes—Donald as Richard Simmons and Autumn as Jane Fonda—leading to a running bit about costume let-downs and hair envy.
- “I don’t think this hair is doing Jane justice. The image on the package was very different.” – Autumn (01:41)
- Donald admits: “If I could have curly hair, this would be my hairstyle.” (01:50)
2. Grown-Ups and Halloween: Losing the Spark
- Both hosts openly admit they're not huge fans of adult Halloween, feeling pressure to participate but mostly wanting to “phone it in.”
- A queer perspective: Donald notes Halloween is especially high-stakes for gay men in LA, where people start preparing all summer.
- “No Halloween for the gays. That is your night...It’s your month.” – Autumn (03:00)
- “It’s like all I see now are characters walking around already weeks before Halloween. People in just next to nothing.” – Donald (03:09)
3. Sexy Costumes & Social Commentary
- The growing trend of risqué costumes as a sort of “free pass” from public decency is discussed, with Donald sharing a hilarious pirate-turned-“stripper” story. (03:48)
- “I’m not a stripper, I’m just a pirate. I’m not taking my clothes off!” – Donald
4. Ages & Acceptable Halloween Behavior
- Trick-or-treating cut-off: Both are firm that teens are too old (“If you can drive, you shouldn’t trick or treat,” Donald, 30:26).
- College-age: Costumes get “sluttier” and then after college, it’s mostly parties with semi-effort costumes.
5. Halloween Overload: Extended ‘Holiday’ Season & Sweet Season
- They lament Halloween’s creep into August, with early store displays and candy.
- “Halloween is one freakin’ day... Why is candy out in August?” – Autumn (06:58)
- Both touch on the “holiday season” as an excuse to overindulge—on both candy and alcohol—and note how this leaks into overall wellness.
- Autumn: “If you’re only celebrating on those days... you’re not going to gain ten pounds.” (09:48)
- Donald: “Some adults are fiend for it just as much as kids.” (09:56)
6. Nostalgia & Halloween’s Best Bits
- Both hosts still love Halloween movies (especially “Hocus Pocus”), enjoying kid costumes, and the general seasonal vibe.
- “The biggest thing I think is the movies. I love scary, even if they’re not really—like Hocus Pocus...” – Donald (13:13)
7. Candy Corn: Love It or Hate It?
- Full-on “team gross”: both hosts hate candy corn and share quirky ways they might eat it—if forced.
- “It grosses me out… my OCD kicks in and I feel like I have to eat each color by itself.” – Donald (15:31)
- “I question those people’s judgment and taste.” – Donald (16:11)
- Favorite candies: peanut M&Ms, Almond Snickers, Butterfinger (Donald); Butterfinger, peanut butter cups, Almond Joy (Autumn).
8. Childhood & Themed Trauma: Halloween in Extreme Religion
- Donald shares a wild story of being forbidden from trick-or-treating due to religious beliefs, and participating in a "Reaper’s House"—an evangelical haunted-house meant to scare kids into faith, complete with live rats, simulated domestic abuse and even a mock school shooting.
- “We did something called... Reaper’s House...when I tell you we should have had lawsuits...” – Donald (18:47)
- Autumn: “That is the most messed up—first of all, just leave it as a horror house.” (22:01)
- Both gasp at the lack of emotional/mental safeguards for kids at those events.
9. Costume Stories: From Madonna to Mummies
- Autumn’s favorite childhood costume: Madonna, age 8. (24:05)
- Both share tales of classic DIY costumes, mummies made of toilet paper, and the pitfalls of over-committing (like Donald wearing non-prescription whiteout contacts and messing up restaurant orders).
10. Costume Etiquette and Couples/Groups vs. ‘Phoning it in’
- Couples/group costumes can be fun—but not mandatory.
- Autumn: “Sometimes your costume doesn’t make sense unless you have the other person.” (31:09)
- “Phoning it in”—funny and low-effort costumes get a pass if they're creative.
- “Some guy wore a shirt, it was like Tinder...I think that's fine.” – Donald (32:13)
- Hilarious bad ideas: friends dressed as tampons, cereal mascots (32:25, 33:12).
11. Pumpkin Spice: Overrated or Essential?
- Whole segment on “Pumpkin Spice Fatigue”; both agree it’s mostly over, except rare exceptions.
- “I’m so over it. Except for, I saw a mix for a pumpkin spice espresso martini…” – Donald (36:42)
- Connect discussion to “sugar season”—too much focus on sweets disguised as seasonal.
12. Etiquette Rapid Fire: “Trick or Treat” Game
- Lightning round on classic Halloween things (Trick/treat = good/bad):
- Haunted houses: Donald “treat,” Autumn “trick” (41:17)
- Bobbing for apples: Both “trick,” due to hygiene (41:31)
- Horror movies: Donald “treat,” Autumn “trick” (42:01)
- Sexy costumes: “Depends who’s wearing it” (42:14)
- Pumpkin carving: Both lean “trick”—too much mess for low payout (43:17)
- Decorating for Halloween before October: Both “trick” (48:54)
13. Holiday Season Creep: Decorations Coming Too Early
- Both express annoyance at Christmas displays going up pre-Halloween; recall childhood when the switch came right after Thanksgiving (49:38).
- Autumn admits to early Christmas decorating, but says it made her tired of the holiday by Christmas day.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Grown-Up Costumes & Hair
“I think I’m gonna rock this all year long... If I could have curly hair, this would be my hairstyle.” – Donald (01:50) -
On Halloween Pressures in the Gay Community
“Gays work out in summer to get ready for Halloween.” – Donald (03:10) -
On Candy Season
“Halloween is one freakin’ day... it’s become a Hallmark holiday, just sell the candy, sell the costumes, make the money.” – Autumn (07:00) -
On Childhood Costumes & Parental Evasion
“When I was like 10, I wasn’t allowed to trick or treat anymore because it was the devil’s holiday. Soon after, every holiday was the devil’s holiday.” – Donald (18:46) -
On Pumpkin Spice
“I’m so over it. Except for, I saw a mix for a pumpkin spice espresso martini.” – Donald (36:42) “You don’t like the fake stuff.” – Autumn (38:07) -
On Over-Decorating
“If you’re decorating seasonally so early, you must not really like your house…” – Donald (51:08)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Opening Costume Fun – 01:28–02:12
- “Too Old For Halloween?” Debate – 02:28–05:27
- Candy Season & Overindulgence – 06:44–10:06
- Halloween Movies & Traditions – 12:31–14:24
- Candy Corn Wars & Favorite Candies – 15:31–17:16
- Donald’s Evangelical House of Horror Story – 18:47–23:32
- Childhood Costumes & DIY Costuming – 24:04–26:18
- Debate: Adult Costume Etiquette – 30:22–32:25
- Pumpkin Spice Dissection – 36:00–39:02
- Trick or Treat Lightning Round – 40:36–44:40
- Christmas Creep & Holiday Overlap – 48:54–50:52
- Closing / Where to Watch & Connect – 52:10
Tone & Atmosphere
Friendly, goofy, nostalgic, with a streak of real talk and honesty—even as they poke fun at themselves and each other. The podcast is packed with playful banter, gentle roasting of holiday traditions, and a spirit of embracing imperfection.
Final Thoughts
This episode of Everything’s Perfect is a comically sharp, yet warmly nostalgic look at why Halloween just isn’t the same once you’re old enough to buy your own candy. Donald and Autumn’s irreverent, candid style makes even the most “basic” Halloween debates engaging—and will make any listener feel better about not having it all figured out when it comes to grown-up holidays.
If you want real talk, laughs, and a little encouragement to phone in your next costume, this is your Halloween listen.
Find pics of their costumes and send your own at Everything's Perfect Official on Instagram, or email everything's perfect podcastmail.com
Next week: More holidays—with a dash of conspiracy theories and AI!
