← Everything's Perfect
Everything's Perfect
Everything’s Perfect…Except Sibling Rivalry (and Taylor Swift)
01:00:18
In this honest and wide-ranging episode, Autumn and Donald cover everything — from Taylor Swift’s Nashville Easter eggs and celebrity genius, to the real and raw dynamics of sibling rivalry and family healing. Through laughter, vulnerability, and a...
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- [00:00]
A
Everything's perfect, you guys. We walked in this studio and there were two spiders on the ceiling. And so I tried to get one and I missed it.
- [00:09]
B
No, seriously, bugs. And then there was a praying mantis and it was outside, but then it was inside.
- [00:14]
A
It fell. I still think it in my shirt somewhere on this chair. I do not feel safe. I feel all anxiety.
- [00:31]
B
Welco back. You were gone. You were in Arizona. I hate you. I was really tired of you leaving me.
- [00:37]
A
I know.
- [00:38]
B
Well, but we're leaving together.
- [00:40]
A
Say we're going to be on a trip together this week. So that'll be fun.
- [00:43]
B
Nashville.
- [00:44]
A
I can't wait.
- [00:45]
B
I'm so excited.
- [00:46]
A
Yeah. I get to do a lot of interesting things. I'm seeing. I'm meeting my newest niece for the first time.
- [00:53]
B
Fun.
- [00:53]
A
Her name's Shiloh. So that's going to be really fun. And then, like, seeing my brother and seeing some friends while we're there.
- [01:01]
B
Yeah.
- [01:01]
A
Hitting up the honky tonks.
- [01:03]
B
Yeah.
- [01:03]
A
Everything's perfect in Nashville.
- [01:05]
B
It is. I have like, nothing. Well, I mean, I have obviously the B or the housewarming birthday party for Nash for our friend Emily and her son Nash. And then I'll wait for you to tell me what we're doing.
- [01:20]
A
Yeah, I'm the worst about that. Nell's very like, okay, these are the plans. And I'm like, just keep your phone close. Like, I'm not a big planner, but I'm definitely looking forward to just going.
- [01:32]
B
To be showing up at, like, Joey's house.
- [01:33]
A
Yeah, totally.
- [01:34]
B
Like, hey, by the way, I'm here.
- [01:36]
A
We'd love that.
- [01:36]
B
Okay.
- [01:37]
A
You're part of the family.
- [01:38]
B
Yeah. I want. I want to see babies.
- [01:41]
A
Yeah, I love babies.
- [01:42]
B
Speaking in Nashville, our girl Taylor dropped a new album.
- [01:47]
A
She sure did.
- [01:48]
B
Have you listened?
- [01:49]
A
I listened to the song Wood like aund times.
- [01:53]
B
You better get it, girl.
- [01:55]
A
I said, oh, I ain't mad at you.
- [01:57]
B
I was listening. I was like, hold on now. Okay.
- [02:02]
A
Yeah. First of all. So I have to be totally honest. I'm not a Swiftie, but I'm not an anti Taylor Swift. I just don't think I have earned the right to call myself a Swifty. So actually, while we were driving back from Arizona, I think we listened to the entire album. Yeah. And it. What I will say, even though I'm not a swiftie, is she is a lyricist like none other.
- [02:25]
B
Like, I will say this too. I wouldn't necessarily classify myself as a Swifty either because Swifties are like, so freaky. Freaking die hard.
- [02:32]
A
Yes.
- [02:33]
B
That. But I love her music and yes, her lyrics. I'm like, this girl is a freaking. You gotta give it to her. I don't care. I. If first of all, if you don't like her, whatever. I don't know why, but she is so freaking hard working. She is so talented and yeah, her ability to write and she's always been.
- [02:55]
A
So generous to everyone. So it's like people who are like, I don't like Taylor, I'm with you. I'm like, well then you just don't like nice people because never heard a negative story about her. If you say you don't like her.
- [03:07]
B
Like for me you don't have to like her music.
- [03:09]
A
Exactly. I like her music, but I don't, I don't. I really love listening to her, the lyrics the same way I would poetry. And her music is cool to like chill. But I'm not like, I couldn't, I couldn't go on and on about Taylor Swift songs, but I still love her.
- [03:27]
B
Like we're not, we're not about to drop it low.
- [03:29]
A
Exactly. But I do love though also the reputation that she has. Everyone I know who's ever worked with her or know someone who's worked with her has nothing but positive things to say about her.
- [03:39]
B
Yeah. Well, our friend Tori spent two years on the last two years on tour with her and like is friends with her. So yes, like, when you hear the stories, they are genuine, they're real. She takes care of everybody. She is so nice. Like, talk about hardworking men. I feel like I am not doing enough with my life. This girl was on tour and put putting on a three hour show and recording another album.
- [04:05]
A
Like, that's pretty.
- [04:07]
B
That's insane. Like, these artists lose their voice in five seconds. This girl is doing the whole show and then recording another album.
- [04:14]
A
And for me, someone who I like, I'm not comparing my songwriting to Taylor Swift, but someone who has written songs and conceptualizes that way. It's so interesting to imagine having your head space like during the day and a new project, new album, new songs and then during the night, fully performing and being immersed in like your current project. So it's really impressive.
- [04:39]
B
Okay. But we have to go one level deeper on the impressiveness. So I don't know if you know this about her, but she loves to drop Easter eggs and hint at what's coming. Okay. This girl was obviously like CIA and former life because the way she does it and how far in advance she does it and the depths. So like it just tells you how like, how her brain works, 1. How intelligent she is and how much, like, just, like, worldly knowledge you have to have in order to do these things. So one of the songs is Fate of Ophelia. That's the new song. Like, that's the first song on the new album, Fate of Ophelia. So you have to know the story of Ophelia, first of all, to even write that song. But then you start seeing all these things that she was dropping one, two, three years earlier to hint at this album coming. And. And she actually said it in an interview. She wanted to see how far out she could drop Easter eggs. Could she do it three years in advance? So for three years, she's been dropping Easter eggs about this album where she didn't even know for sure she was gonna get her music back. Which, you know, there's. There's, like, talk about if the one song, Father Figure, is about getting her music back, because she talks about protecting the family, like, that being her music and protecting it and things like that. And so anyways, I just find it fascinating, like, so I went and saw her last concert. Okay. You would never know this, but at one point, like, behind her, there's a huge screen, and it flashes just these different colors. It's freaking braille.
- [06:11]
A
Are you serious?
- [06:12]
B
Yes. And it. And then when you, like, decode it and put it together, it says, like. I think it said, like, I love you. Like, maybe it was like, I love you, sweetheart. Good night, sweet dreams. I forget, but somebody, like, screenshotted it, put it in chat, GBT AI decode it. That's what it is. What? Or like, at the end of that. That concert, she would dive into, like, a pool of water. But the album cover of Life of a Showgirl, she's in water. So it's all these little Easter eggs, and I'm like, your brain is fricking amazing.
- [06:50]
A
Yeah.
- [06:51]
B
I'm all, can I get some of that marketing material?
- [06:53]
A
It really is.
- [06:53]
B
Who do you work with?
- [06:54]
A
For real?
- [06:55]
B
Can I get a number?
- [06:56]
A
So impressive. It speaks also to her, like, poetic way that she views outside of just a song, but her whole. The whole project, her whole brand, the whole career. It's amazing. It's really cool.
- [07:10]
B
It really is. It's not just a SO song or it's not just an album. It's. It's a whole experience. It is a show girl. Like, this immersive experience. And I think that's why the Swifties love her so much and are, like, so invested, because it's like, you're not just waiting for a song to drop.
- [07:30]
A
Yeah.
- [07:31]
B
You have a whole. You know, it's like a treasure hunt, I think. Fun.
- [07:35]
A
I think it's so cool.
- [07:37]
B
Yeah.
- [07:37]
A
It's so interesting because I'm a big Beyonce fan, and a lot of people, like, for some reason, have to just compare and decide who's quote better.
- [07:50]
B
Yeah. I don't know why they're so different.
- [07:52]
A
Ridiculous. And it's really just in a way, I think society always pinning women against.
- [07:56]
B
Women against each other.
- [07:58]
A
But, you know, I think it's good to realize those things just so we can be more intentional to not do that. But I feel the same way as about Beyonce's project. The intentionality that goes in. And that's why it's like game recognizes game. I love the hearing this and. And I love. I have friends who are die hard swifties who will go on and on. I could literally talk to them for three hours every day, and they'll be telling me about Taylor's hint and what this actually means. And it's so cool. It's so artistic.
- [08:31]
B
It's very.
- [08:31]
A
And it really gives fans something to chew on, you know, something to really dive into.
- [08:36]
B
Some of her lyrics, let me just tell you. They were hitting so hard, though. I was listening. I listened a couple times. Opalite. So good. She was saying. She says, hold on, I gotta pull it up. Because I was like, get it, girl. There's this one line it opens up with go. Like she's talking about ghosts of her past. So she's talking about ex boyfriends and how she. And then she's like, my brother calls it eating from the trash. Like that she would always, like, fixate on old boyfriends.
- [09:13]
A
Yeah. I was like, that's a good Savage.
- [09:17]
B
Savage. Yeah.
- [09:19]
A
But actually, that makes me think of a song too, that you're looking for. The lyric.
- [09:23]
B
I was trying to, but yeah. I don't know why it's not giving it to me. Go ahead. What are you gonna say?
- [09:29]
A
The lyric, Jimmy. It was something about, I'm not savage. I'm not.
- [09:33]
B
Oh, yeah.
- [09:34]
A
And I just really loved what I was.
- [09:36]
B
I think that's on wish list.
- [09:37]
A
Getting from it. Yeah.
- [09:39]
B
Yeah. And then wait. Everybody thought ruin the friendship was gonna be about her friendship with Blake Lively. It's not at all. If you really listen to the lyrics, I don't know who it's about. It's about a friend from high school that I think committed suicide.
- [09:59]
A
Oh, wow.
- [10:00]
B
And that she was saying that she should have kissed him and ruined the friendship. I thought that was interesting. And canceled is just so good, huh? She likes her friends canceled. Drifting Gucci. I was like, we should. We definitely need to be friends. And they're saying, life of a showgirl. People are saying they think it's about Britney.
- [10:21]
A
Oh, interesting.
- [10:21]
B
Because she always loved Britney. And there's like a whole part where she's talking about waiting outside the stage door and you came out and you said, you're living my life. And, like, that she was like, basically like, oh, honey, you don't know the life of a showgirl. Like, the more you do, the more they. They take kind of thing.
- [10:38]
A
Yeah. Anyways, that's the other thing I love is when you. It's. Her art is one that, as you talk about it, it has such depth. I want to go back and list.
- [10:52]
B
Oh, yeah, I've listened to it so many times already. And I'm like, trying to figure out, like. And then if you go down the rabbit hole of social media and you and the Swifty and you start seeing with the Swifties, like. And you're like, oh, oh, she just did this whole thing too. There's, like, videos being released over the last day or two. There's. I think it's 12 orange doors in 12 different cities that pop up. Like, the first one happened in Berlin. Like, an orange door, like, ends up showing up in the city. And it has a QR code. And you scan it and then a little music video play. But there's hints in it. So, like, talk about, like, the escape room.
- [11:28]
A
Oh, yeah.
- [11:28]
B
It's like, escape room, next level. And then you gotta wait. So first of all, you had to decipher where the cities were gonna be because they weren't spelled out. It was like the letters were all shuffled. And then people figured out it was like Berlin and Paris and New York and Chicago and they think one of them, Santa Monica. But yeah, I just. I find it fascinating. I was like, this is like marketing and PR to the Nth degree.
- [11:54]
A
Goals.
- [11:55]
B
Seriously. I need some Taylor money so that I can hire our marketing team for real. Be like, let's do this some.
- [12:04]
A
Yeah.
- [12:04]
B
I need to have track Pilates doors pop up on in different.
- [12:07]
A
Yeah.
- [12:08]
B
In different countries. QR code. Here's how you do the move. Not as exciting.
- [12:16]
A
This is exciting.
- [12:17]
B
I'll try.
- [12:17]
A
It's for a different. Different audience.
- [12:23]
B
So what else? We're gonna go see Joey.
- [12:26]
A
Yeah. I cannot wait. I'm actually gonna record some music with him. Just. We're gonna do a cute Christmas song. I think this trip oh, fun. Perfect. Because if we. You don't. You have to wait several months because unless you're Taylor Swift, people only listen to Christmas music from, like, you know, November to the. Through the end of the year.
- [12:44]
B
Yeah, you better get that out right quick. I only listen to Christmas music the day after Thanksgiving until Christmas Day. The day after Christmas, we're done. Santa has gone home.
- [12:56]
A
Yeah.
- [12:57]
B
Let the man rest are resting. The reindeer are put away.
- [13:01]
A
Yeah, totally. If some comes on like, Santa Claus is coming.
- [13:07]
B
Oh, my God.
- [13:08]
A
It's like he already.
- [13:09]
B
That was the exact song I was thinking. Really? Yeah.
- [13:12]
A
Oh, my God. I saw this thing on Instagram that said science is showing that best friends brains actually, like, sync up and. And is giving it. It says it's so. It's very close to what people think of as telepathy. I'm like, well, that tracks. Yeah.
- [13:29]
B
No, think about it. How many times have we come dressed alike? It used to happen when I was in college, like, in dance class. It was so funny. Like, nobody. We would never plan it, but you walk into class and all of a sudden, the majority of the girls were in a red leotard. And then the next day, the majority of the girls would be in, like, a blue leotard. And it was like, nobody's. There's 30 of us, nobody's talking, going, what color leotard do we wear tomorrow? It just like. And then obviously, girls, periods sync up.
- [13:55]
A
Yeah.
- [13:55]
B
There's usually one alpha. I was always the alpha.
- [13:57]
A
Okay. So I was literally just thinking about that before you said it, and I find that so interesting. And I thought that was like, I was talking to someone. I don't remember who, and I don't want to throw him under the bus, but it was about how that isn't actually a proven thing. And I'm like, it is common knowledge. Everyone knows if a bunch of women get together, they all kind of sync up. And that is also. That's wild.
- [14:25]
B
Yeah. Like, I don't know if it's proven or not, but it happens every time.
- [14:29]
A
I've been around a big group of women. Like when we film programs, for example, by the end of filming, every single female is on the same cycle, and.
- [14:38]
B
It was usually mine because I am the alpha. Duh. Dom tells me, though, that the new term, it's not Alpha. Like, the better is sigma. Like, they'll always be like, that's such a sigma. And I'm like, what? No. What does that mean?
- [14:55]
A
What's the origin of sigma?
- [14:57]
B
I don't know. I mean, I'M It's Latin, but I don't know, like, these kids just decided that Sigma meant better.
- [15:03]
A
Sounds like schmagma. It does. It just.
- [15:13]
B
Where my brain goes.
- [15:14]
A
I don't make the rules. Sigma smegma is not that different.
- [15:21]
B
Oh. So, yeah, girls, we sync up. Well, I don't anymore, so I wonder how that works.
- [15:26]
A
Were you and did okay? Because I know you moved. Did you and Kaylee live together at the same time when you were both, like, cycling? Yeah. No.
- [15:39]
B
Let's see.
- [15:41]
A
Except for, I guess, later in life when she moved to California, but when you were younger.
- [15:46]
B
Well, I. I got my period, but this is not where I expected this.
- [15:50]
A
Episode to go either, honestly. Join the ride.
- [15:53]
B
Yeah, I was. It was the end of eighth grade, literally, like the last week of school of eighth grade when I got mine, so I was late. So that was me. That means it was the end of her senior year. So she was. So it would have only been a couple months. It would have been the summer. And that early on, like, for me, like, that's probably way too early to, like, it's all over the place at that point. And then she lived with me in California, but she was on a emotional roller coaster because she was going through the divorce, so.
- [16:29]
A
Oh, yeah.
- [16:30]
B
So also, like, lord only knows what her cycle was doing at that point. I don't know. We could have been. I don't know if we ever talked about it, but like. Yeah, but it. It definitely happened. Anytime I had roommates, it always happened.
- [16:43]
A
Yeah. It's just very interesting. And it. There is something to it. Like when you're. When you are around people, like, outside. Okay. Moving on from the feminine cycle, like, just you. You really do sync up. You start to vibe with that person. And even when you're not around them, it's funny how you can get together and realize you're both having a off day or a good day or, you know.
- [17:06]
B
Sorry. Off your day.
- [17:09]
A
Did I. Nah, it's all right.
- [17:12]
B
I was literally so last night because I just. I've been in it, guys. I've been just in it. Like, there's just. I'm in a big season of change.
- [17:20]
A
Yeah.
- [17:21]
B
And it has been since last year, since everything changed with the company. It has. And every time I think I've got a handle on it, man. The universe is like, haha. And it like, shoves me right back down. I'm like, God, I just got back up and I just cleaned myself off. But all right, I guess I'm back down in the dirt. Again. But anyways, I was like scrolling social last night and I saw Alex Hermosi. There was a post up and he was saying, if you can be in a bad mood for no reason, you can be in a good mood for no reason. And I was like, oh, that's something to like chew on now. I'm not in a bad mood for no reason. I have great reason. I have a lot of good fucking reasons right now to be irritated. But. But I also still have a lot of good reasons to be in a good mood too.
- [18:08]
A
Yeah.
- [18:09]
B
And it's just I'm kind of letting the bad stuff win right now. So anyways, I'm trying to find that. I really am trying to find that, like, you have just as much of a good reason, like, reason to be in good moods. So, like, it. The hard stuff always works itself out. We know that. Like, yeah, I've been down and out a million times in life and guess what? I'm still show up and I'm still here and there's still great times in my life and, you know, so I know that I just have to get over the transition phase that I'm in. And I'll look back and I'll be like, oh, God, remember when that was like, like so hard and I.
- [18:49]
A
When you're in it, would you agree that a lot of it is also the change in things that are happening? Our brains so easily go to the. Where that's gonna like the worst case scenario of those changes. Yeah, I've been reminded of that so much lately. It really does take effort. Like you have to be intentional because of. I think it's a defense mechanism. I think we've touched on this before, but we've recorded so many episodes. I don't know if I've ever. Like, guys, I'm sor. Sorry if I repeat myself, but I have no idea.
- [19:20]
B
Six that didn't record. So we have no idea what we're repeating at this point in time.
- [19:24]
A
Could be the same episode, but you have to. I heard someone say in neuropsychology, you have to think about a positive thing, 15 to 20 seconds for it to become part of your long term memory.
- [19:37]
B
We talked about this when I talked about my brain scans. Yes, but in case somebody did listen to that one.
- [19:41]
A
But it is. And it's like even now I'm in a lot of change too, and I start to feel all this like, panic and all of my panic is around what could happen. And I'm like, okay, well, or what could go wrong?
- [19:53]
B
Exactly. Exactly what could happen and go, right, yeah, right.
- [19:57]
A
But when I think what could happen, my brain is like, I'll tell you what could happen, and it ain't pretty. This could happen. This could happen. Like, you, like your teeth, they're all gonna fall out. Like, just everything. All of a sudden I'm like, yeah.
- [20:12]
B
Yeah.
- [20:13]
A
So remembering. Okay, that doesn't serve me. Let me think about the positive and also just, I don't know, try and get around someone to distract you.
- [20:24]
B
Yeah.
- [20:24]
A
Because sometimes healthy, good, positive distractions are a good thing.
- [20:28]
B
Yes. Which is why I'm very excited to go to Nashville. That'll be a fun few days. I'm excited for this podcast record. I actually have a fun week. Like tomorrow I have an all day photo shoot. But I let. I let the littlest, dumbest things get to me because my photographer's like, what are we shooting? And I'm like, I don't know. I just need photos because my hair is short. And I was like, I need photos for social lifestyle. And so I get overwhelmed by things like that easily. I also know I just got the third version of the formulation of my beverages. So we're really close to, like, the next step. And I get super over, which is so exciting. We're that much closer to being able to launch it. So I should be really excited. But I get so overwhelmed by like, oh, my God, what's next? What do I have to do? Am I going to be able to do it? Is it going to go. I went to Erewhon yesterday, funny story. And I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but so I go to Erewhon and we're in the design process of the can and we're pretty close to it. And I'm really excited about the design process. And I was like, I literally bought like eight beverages that sort of fall in similar categories as what I'm creating. Because I was like, let me just try them. Like, I just want to see, like, what cans do. I like the way they look. How are they popping on the thing now? Let me see, like, when I bring them home. Donald, they were all disgusting.
- [21:49]
A
Oh, really?
- [21:50]
B
I am not saying that to be mean. I'm not gonna drop names of them, but I am like, how did these things get put on the shelf? Like, so fake tasting or just such a bad, like, weird bitter after, like, I was like, sip. I was like. And I was like, oh, my God, mine are so good.
- [22:09]
A
They're so good.
- [22:10]
B
They're so good. Like, and then when I'm like, comparing them to that, I'm like, if people are buying this, there's no way my brand won't do well. Because that's trash.
- [22:20]
A
Right?
- [22:21]
B
And I'm again, I'm not trying to be mean. Like, I was really trying to find one that's like, okay, great. Like, this one's really good.
- [22:26]
A
It's like, healthy competition.
- [22:28]
B
Yeah.
- [22:28]
A
Like, this is the one to be.
- [22:29]
B
Yeah, listen, this is the ones. Or like, these are the. The couple are like, oh, that tasted really good. Like, is that something I need to think about? No, I was like, barf, girl.
- [22:43]
A
I feel you.
- [22:44]
B
So I get excited about that.
- [22:46]
A
Yeah, you got a good, good, good fucking product. As one of the few people who have gotten to try during the process, I'm like, okay, this shit is exciting.
- [22:58]
B
You haven't even tried this. We're tasting them in Nashville. I had. Where I had eight of each flavor sent to Emily's.
- [23:06]
A
Oh, good.
- [23:07]
B
So that me, you, Nell, Emily, Dylan, Heather, Tara, we could all sit down and do a little. And I could get your guys feedback before the fourth and hopefully final formulation.
- [23:18]
A
Yes. I cannot wait. It's so fun. And I can't wait for everyone else to be able to try. You guys, you're gonna just lose your minds over it.
- [23:27]
B
So we're getting there. So how far into this episode are we?
- [23:34]
A
25 minutes.
- [23:35]
B
Oh, good, we got time.
- [23:36]
A
Yeah.
- [23:37]
B
So one of our episodes didn't record. We were talking about sibling rivalry.
- [23:43]
A
Yeah.
- [23:44]
B
Should we go there? Should we talk about it again? Sure, let's dig back in. Well, and we kind of talked about it, knowing you and Joey were going to be recording your song. And I was saying it because what. What did I see in the news.
- [23:57]
A
That day was him not.
- [23:59]
B
Oh, that's what it was.
- [24:00]
A
Yeah.
- [24:01]
B
Oh, and I talk about Savage, the Kardashians. I'm here for it.
- [24:06]
A
Yeah, me too.
- [24:07]
B
Oh, Chris, please take me. She's right down the street. I met her before. No, I was saying. So Kim launched Skims. Her Skims collab with Nike.
- [24:24]
A
Yeah.
- [24:25]
B
Chloe launched her second collab with Fabletics. And I had. And I was doing my. I'm partner with Fabletics. I love them. And I was doing my post for them. And as I was, like, doing my post, it sort of hit me, like, wait, I just saw the ad for Skims and Nike that this just dropped. And I was like, I wonder how close these drop together. And I looked at it, and Chloe's dropped September 25, and Kim dropped hers the next day. I was like, like, that Is, y' all know, you had to know you were dropping them back to back.
- [25:02]
A
Totally.
- [25:03]
B
And I was like, is that ruthless? First of all, Is that good marketing? Is that ruthless? Is that, like, just business? Because we all know they've had their own sisterly things, like Kim and Cl Or Kim and Courtney with the whole Dolce and Gabbana thing. Although that was ridiculous on Courtney's part, but whatevs. But, you know, I was like. I just was like, oh, we gotta dive into this.
- [25:24]
A
Yeah.
- [25:25]
B
So what do you think? Do you think, is it savage or is that just business?
- [25:29]
A
I. I lean towards. It's just business. I do think it's good marketing also, like, for them specifically, because they have a show. So if they dive into that, then technically, like, if I was either Fabletics or Nike, that little sibling rivalry just brings more attention to our brands.
- [25:49]
B
Right.
- [25:49]
A
Without just talking about the brand, you know, and people. It. It sort of gives people drive to be like, yeah, that should have been.
- [25:57]
B
Different, or this should have.
- [25:58]
A
Or even just to look at both. Maybe a lot of people didn't know about one, but because of the controversy, they will learn about it. But I could also see, because I've had times, like we've talked about before, my brother Joey is a professional musician. He's a singer. He's in a vocal group, but he also is a wildly talented instrumentalist. He produces, I think, all, but at least most, and arranges their music. And the band that he's in, they're called Anthem Lights, if you guys want to check them out. My brother's Joey Stamper. And that was hard for me because at different times, because I am the singer of the family.
- [26:40]
B
Right?
- [26:40]
A
I'm the. You know what I mean? Like, and. And when Joey started really finding a little different and bigger platforms and success in music, there was a little bit of sibling rivalry that I felt. And it's interesting. It's an interesting thing because you love your sibling, you want the best for your sibling. But also, what the fuck. Yeah, I'm right here, bitch.
- [27:02]
B
Stay in here.
- [27:03]
A
You know what I exactly like. I thought you liked horses. What are you doing singing? Like, I should have known because she.
- [27:10]
B
Was like, the guitar Joey.
- [27:12]
A
Yeah, exactly. Get on the piano. You're great at that. Let me be the singer. But so, yeah, it's a thing that I think everybody feels. Have you ever experienced in any way? So you got a lot of fucking siblings?
- [27:29]
B
First of all, I got a lot of siblings. Yeah. Not so much with either of my brothers. So I have my older brother Bobby and my younger brother John, not with them. I've experienced it with both of my sisters, but only when we were older, like recently. And like you said, it's the same thing. You always want what's best for your siblings. Like you always want them to be happy too. I feel like I, for so many years, like growing up, I grew up with Bobby and Kaylee. Like we were raised by my dad, grew up with them. And they were always the super smart ones, the, the book ones who got like the best grades in school, that kind of thing. And I was the performer and nobody really expected a lot out of me. Like, they really didn't, if I'm just being honest. Like it was just all autumn and she's the dancer.
- [28:19]
A
I love a come up story.
- [28:21]
B
I'm telling you, man. Yeah, like I was like, I'll show you guys. Like, I, it wasn't that I wasn't smart, it was that I just hated school. Like, I was really bored. I didn't like to sit still. But then when I found things that I really liked, then I was like locked and loaded in the books.
- [28:35]
A
Yeah.
- [28:36]
B
So yes, my come up especially through Body Beachbody, you know, I think everybody was super surprised by that. And then it was, it was a while like, like Kaylee always liked health and nutrition and, and things like that. So I don't want to take that and say like she never did because she always did. But she was, she went school for PR and writing like that. She's very talented at that. But more and more she started to move into that like health and wellness space. And so that it wasn't even hard for me. It wasn't hard until I was in the middle of launching a gut health program and she went and launched a gut health program. That was, that was hard for me because it felt very much like trying to beat me to it. And I've never really talked about it. And it's. I love my sister and you know, people ask questions all the time. And while I'm not gonna fully get into things this, I, I don't, I don't think it was a malicious thing. It was just there was always this part of me that was like, let me have my one thing. Like and same thing with my little sister. Like I'm 11 years older than her. I was the dancer. Like then I, you know, was a fitness competitor and like it was a constant thing of like autumn dance. So then my little sister dance and not saying that they can't like you can't dance of Course you can. But it was hard. There's all mixed in with parents. So, like, my mom never paid for anything, ever. Every competition, everything I did, I had to pay for on my own. From the, the class, the lessons, to the, to the travel, to the costumes, all of it. But then when my little sister got to that age, they paid for her to dance like 15, 20 hours a week. And it was just like, oh, that must be nice, you know, so it was like, stuff like that. So it wasn't even necessary like that. But then, like, like I worked at Equinox. Five years later, she worked at Equinox, not in the same state. And then I. I had already competed. Then she tried to compete. So it was like things like that, where I was like, it's more just like you sometimes wish, like, follow your own path. Yeah, but again, I. I just want to be very clear. I have nothing but love for my siblings. But that doesn't mean that there hasn't been a little.
- [30:49]
A
I mean, sometimes feelings come up that we just have. Like, the whole point is being real about them.
- [30:54]
B
I'm sure, by the way, my sisters, I'm sure would probably have plenty.
- [30:57]
A
Absolutely. I can't imagine, like, I'm sure I was a very hard person, like, for my two younger brothers to. To be in the shadow of, because I was definitely, like the loudest. I was the one pulling attention in the room.
- [31:13]
B
Like, see, and you're the oldest, right?
- [31:14]
A
Yeah.
- [31:15]
B
Which is interesting. That's not normally the personality of the oldest.
- [31:20]
A
Okay, I. We disagree on this.
- [31:23]
B
I'm just saying what you normally see people say, like, when, like when you look at, like psychologists and, or psychiatrists and they talk about it and your position in this, the sibling hierarchy.
- [31:36]
A
Yeah, I thought the opposite. I thought the oldest is usually like, like, like you give oldest sibling vibes, to my understanding. Honestly, no.
- [31:45]
B
I'm the baby. I'm like the wild child. Loud. What are you talking about? I am like, attention.
- [31:52]
A
I think that's the oldest sibling.
- [31:54]
B
And. No, see, I think you give youngest sibling vibes.
- [31:56]
A
Well, I was homeschooled, but you hated school, so we're just a couple idiots talking about psychology over here.
- [32:01]
B
We're talking about shit we don't know.
- [32:02]
A
About, but either way, I'm sure no matter. Honestly, birth order does matter. But regardless, me talking about that with my brother Joey and my brother Kenny. So it goes. I'm the oldest, then my brother Kenny, then Joey's the youngest, and we're all within about five years. So similar distance to you. Kaylee.
- [32:23]
B
And five years in between each one of you?
- [32:26]
A
No.
- [32:26]
B
Oh, total, right.
- [32:27]
A
Five, six years.
- [32:28]
B
Because we're like two years apart.
- [32:29]
A
Exactly. So with Kenny one time, I had a really good friend. And. And that was something that was. I think. I don't know what other kids felt going to school, but I didn't have a lot of opportunity to meet friends. It was like kids in my neighborhood or kids I went to church with.
- [32:46]
B
Right.
- [32:46]
A
Or like my cousins, which was cool because I had a lot of cousins. But I had a friend who Kenny, as he got older, they started hanging out and we'd kind of all hang out together. But Kenny and I were very different.
- [32:58]
B
Right.
- [32:59]
A
And my friend who was my friend first became Kenny's best friend.
- [33:04]
B
Oh, wow.
- [33:05]
A
And that was difficult for me. And I was like, what the fuck? Like, that's my friend. Go find your own friend.
- [33:11]
B
You know, I do sometimes wonder if Kaylee feels that about us because you and I became such, like, I met you through Kaylee, but, like, you and I became such good friends.
- [33:24]
A
I don't know. But I was.
- [33:25]
B
You guys were still good friends, too, that she just.
- [33:28]
A
I mean, things change. Yeah, things change. I have nothing to that point. I have nothing but love for Kaylee.
- [33:36]
B
Yeah.
- [33:37]
A
And I know you feel the same, but if she. If anyone ever felt that way about me in a friendship, I would love for them to call me because I'm the who. Literally, you. Through my birthday party, I had friends who I met when I was like, 13 here. You know what I mean?
- [33:49]
B
Yes.
- [33:50]
A
So I'm a lifer. If you'll stick around, I'll stick around.
- [33:53]
B
Right? Yeah. I mean, if you're age.
- [33:54]
A
Unless you're like a. Unless you're turning into a real bitch, you know? So anywho.
- [34:02]
B
Anywho about this last year.
- [34:07]
A
I can imagine, like, how difficult it was also for my brothers. It's just something siblings feel. And it's weird because it's like society thinks there can only be. I was sitting here thinking about famous siblings we know and, like, know of. Not that you and I know personally, but everyone listening that we all know of, like Britney and her sister Jamie. Jessica and her sister Jessica Simpson and her sister Ashley Simpson. I'm like, I don't know if Jessica's a. Just a one man. Yeah. Jessica Simpson.
- [34:38]
B
Venus and Serena tennis.
- [34:41]
A
Yep.
- [34:42]
B
Like, that to me is crazy. The. The Venus and Serena, because they're both phenomenal, but one is ranked better.
- [34:52]
A
Yeah.
- [34:53]
B
And when they play doubles, whenever they would play doubles, they were partners. So just, you know, the two of them would step on the court and just dominate.
- [35:01]
A
Yeah.
- [35:02]
B
Well then what happens when you got to go against each other?
- [35:04]
A
Oh, yeah.
- [35:05]
B
Like there's a difference. Like, right. Like even like, okay, Britney and Jamie, like, like you're not getting on this stage and, and one is going to win and one is going to lose.
- [35:13]
A
Right, Right.
- [35:15]
B
Can you imagine you have to step on the court with your sister who you love, and one minute your teammates and you're like, let's, let's kill him. And then the next minute you're like, you're going down.
- [35:24]
A
Yeah.
- [35:24]
B
Or like the Kelsey brothers.
- [35:26]
A
Like, I don't know about them.
- [35:29]
B
So I. I forget Travis's brother's name right now. I'm going to draw a blank, which I should know, cuz we were just talking about Taylor Swift. But like, like they were on different teams and played against each other in the Super Bowl. The mom had a jersey that was like, literally custom made. That was like half one team and half the other. Oh, wow. How do you know who to cheer for as a parent?
- [35:50]
A
Yeah. Like, it's like you're gonna have a happy and a sad day no matter how you look at it.
- [35:54]
B
No matter how it's like, yeah, your.
- [35:58]
A
Jersey says you are a half loser no matter what. Matter what happens. Like, you can go home. You know how it's gonna end for you.
- [36:04]
B
Yeah. And like the one that loses, you're like trying to console them, but then the one that won is like, why aren't you celebrating, meat? Like, that's got to be hard.
- [36:11]
A
Yeah.
- [36:11]
B
See, Pick your lanes. Kids don't do the same thing.
- [36:15]
A
But I was also thinking about siblings. Like, I was like, what? Famous siblings are both like, really? And I was thinking about Derek and Juliana and Julian. Yeah. Huff. They both are pretty wildly successful. They both were wild. Were arguably two of the most successful names, professional dancers in early days. And now he's a judge and she's a host on Dancing with the Stars. They both did. I think she did more movies, but he did. I don't know.
- [36:52]
B
The only movie I know her in was Rock of Ages. Has she done more?
- [36:56]
A
I don't remember.
- [36:57]
B
She might. She sings. She's a very talented singer, believe it or not. She has a really good voice.
- [37:02]
A
I'll be the judge of that.
- [37:03]
B
Oh, but she does. Listen to her sing.
- [37:06]
A
Yeah, but, yeah, but for the most of the time, like Beyonce and Solange.
- [37:11]
B
Yeah.
- [37:12]
A
It's hot. Like for one huge star. If, if you are a sibling and you're in that same area. It's the same like field.
- [37:23]
B
Right.
- [37:23]
A
It's very difficult to like, you need some personal development to manage this. Like. Well, I'm happy for you, but damn.
- [37:32]
B
Here's an interesting one. What about Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen? Because they're twins. They're identical twins. Obviously identical right down to like the dollar amount that they were making because they were on Full House together. And then the deals that were done for them were all done as them together, all the movies they made together. They became. Became the youngest billionaires ever at 18 when their.
- [37:55]
A
Huh.
- [37:56]
B
Shit Rolled over for them to take full control over. And then from there things got a little crazy.
- [38:04]
A
But yeah, they, they are a good example of like, one is not more successful than the other. They. But they're also don't have much. Maybe if you're a big fan, maybe you could correct me, someone listening. But they don't have a lot of individual. Like they are each other's success.
- [38:26]
B
Yeah, I think probably the older they got because I don't like. I think one does something with clothing fashion more than the like, I haven't followed along in years. But yeah, they came up together as a dealer. But it is. I think a lot of it has to do with also though, with like parents and how. I was saying, I think the last time we recorded this episode that no siblings are raised by the same parents. And people are probably like, what the heck do you mean? But it's like, well, when you're the first sibling, you. That you're the first child. So that those parents, they don't know what they're doing. It's the first time they've ever done any of it. So they're finding their way. And it's the. You know, you're the most fearful of everything and you're trying to figure it out. And then by the time you have the second or third, I mean, you're just, you know, you spit on the pacifier and put it back in the baby's mouth. They're fine. They're gonna be okay. You know, like, you're doing 17 things that. And that first kid gets all your attention. But by the time you have the third, there's two others that still need attention too. And you might be in different places financially. So like, yeah, you have the same parents, but you don't have the same parents.
- [39:33]
A
Right.
- [39:33]
B
So even that I feel like can play into how that sibling rivalry can happen. Is there one that's favored? I could tell you right now, I love my dad. He also drives me insane. I don't know what it is, but in his eyes, Kaylee can do no wrong.
- [39:54]
A
Really?
- [39:55]
B
Oh, my God. It's like he'll always be like, well, you guys need it. And I'm like, hold on. Hold your slow. Your freaking roll, man. One is not the problem. And the other. Or like, just. Just with any. Like. Like, there is definitely, like, some sometimes. And it's not a favoritism, like, I like her more or anything like that, but there's definitely just a different way that he responds. And that's also because we have different personalities, you know, so they're gonna treat each personality different.
- [40:28]
A
Yeah.
- [40:29]
B
So I just think it's so interesting when you start getting into all of it or like, sometimes. Like, I remember there was this one girl I was really good friends with in grade school, and it was her and her brother, and they. They hated each other, but we were young. Like, I'm talking, like, 12, 13. And so her brother was probably two years younger than her. And I always found it so interesting because their mom just, like, never tried to make them get along. Yeah, she just allowed. And I was like, my dad would not be having this shit like me. Kaylie, Bobby, were always like, we're ride or die. We grew up. I mean, we had to, to survive. Like, let's be honest, I felt like.
- [41:07]
A
I grew up in a moment. Mob family. It was like, your family's always there. You know what I mean? They're your family. You always have their back.
- [41:15]
B
And by the way, same. And we still do.
- [41:18]
A
Right?
- [41:18]
B
Like, it doesn't matter if time is gone without talking or not or whatever. Like, you call.
- [41:24]
A
Yeah.
- [41:25]
B
The phone will be answered and I will show up.
- [41:28]
A
Yeah, that's exactly how I feel.
- [41:30]
B
So it's a. Like, whatever the petty whatever is, it doesn't matter.
- [41:33]
A
Like, like, yeah, it still trumps, like, your family. You're. You're there for each other.
- [41:38]
B
Yeah. Like, ride or die, for sure.
- [41:41]
A
It's interesting. I definitely do think parents have favorites. And you're a parent of a.
- [41:45]
B
Of a one child, a favorite in my family.
- [41:49]
A
See, Joey and I would always argue over which was, like, if I was the favorite or he was the favorite, which is so rude because we have another brother.
- [41:59]
B
Well, so we already know Kenny's ruled out.
- [42:01]
A
Well, so my mom would always, always say, you're both wrong. Kenny's my favorite. And I was like, it's fine. Joey can be the favorite of mom and dad, but I'm Grandma and Grandpa's favorite, so. But it is in all reality, I Think it's probably more like your favorite changes on. Based on which kid is giving you the last. And that's just life. Like, if I had three kids and one of them was like, you know, listened better and. And I love all of them, but that one's my favorite, you know, because the other ones is like, ah, yeah.
- [42:35]
B
You know, definitely not the favorite to either. I would have never even assumed I was the favorite to either one of my parents, especially my mother.
- [42:42]
A
But that's obvious. Maybe that's why you chased success. I also do think that actually I just had this thought. It's not about. It's not about you. Which it could seem that it is. But I think that parents. And if they really favor other children, that also really feeds into sibling rivalry. Because even later on it's like you could feel like, okay, you always were getting the love and affection and attention.
- [43:09]
B
Yep.
- [43:10]
A
And now you're trying to take it when I'm succeeding here or now everyone sees you for this and I'm, you know, like, it's so. It's so.
- [43:19]
B
Yeah. No and no. That's exact. Like when you say that's probably why you work so hard for success. Yes. In my personal development work that I am really focused on right now and trying to, like, heal some of my childhood trauma and wounds. It is very much a feeling like, I have a lot of. Again, not being. Like, I have to earn love.
- [43:48]
A
Yeah.
- [43:49]
B
Like, if I'm not doing A, B or C, I'm not going to get it. It and. Or it will leave. Like, if I'm not being super successful, then I'm not worth anything. Or I'm not worth keeping around or any of that. Like. Or, like, oh, your times passed. So, like, we're done with you. You're discarded now.
- [44:09]
A
Yeah.
- [44:09]
B
And that's probably. How do we end up here.
- [44:16]
A
It's all right.
- [44:17]
B
Therapy session. No, it's probably a lot of what I've been dealing with with this past year. I. And all the changes and feeling like, oh, okay, if I'm not offering something up, I'm not good enough just as I am.
- [44:34]
A
Well, I think that makes a lot of sense. And as your friend and someone who loves you, I have, you know, like, thinking about you in this transition. It makes total sense. You're. That the people have learned of the icon that you are because of something that doesn't feel as stable because of the work you were doing that is shifting and just changing in a way. And it's not weird or it shouldn't be. Hard for anyone to imagine how difficult that is. But I love you regardless, and a lot of people do. And I also, you know, it's. It's also really cool. I also had this thought while you were talking. It's really cool to be friends with people who you can see who you're friends with over the years, and you can see the progression and growth. And I think that comes with just instead of asking, like, for me, asking myself less like. And this is a thought I had about myself. This isn't as much about your situation instead of like, where am I justified? Which is sort of like what the difficult parts of me, like, with my childhood would want to find. Asking myself where I need to heal. It's a painful journey, but it's one that really is so satisfying.
- [45:53]
B
Yeah.
- [45:54]
A
As you progress. But, yes, I love you and I admire you in all of this. I know we didn't mean to go.
- [46:01]
B
There, but it's, you know, I wasn't expecting. I'm like, oh, what are we talking about? We went from Taylor Swift to sibling rivalry to my childhood trauma.
- [46:08]
A
Well, it always comes back.
- [46:10]
B
That's all right. It's always lingering. I'm really just trying to get that wound. Like, can we.
- [46:16]
A
Can we just.
- [46:17]
B
Can we just heal this bitch once and for all?
- [46:19]
A
Yeah. No, I'm tired of the. Like, after you have a physical injury, the physical therapy that goes on for months.
- [46:25]
B
Right.
- [46:25]
A
Let's move on from that.
- [46:26]
B
Right. Wait, there's. Okay, so, but one person, this guy. I'm just gonna mention him on here because his stuff is so good. Okay, hold on. His awakening with Brian. That's his handle. Awakening with Brian. His information is so good, and it's, like, so spot on. So I've been, like, looking at his. I've been listening to a lot of his stuff, and then I actually just mess. I actually just DM'd him to fill out, like, the form to possibly, like, work with him. Because we were talking about this where I, like, I am not a talk therapy kind of person. Like, let's just get to the root. Let me tell me how. Because he. And he even talks about. He's like, you can't intellectualize your. He's like, you know, everybody wants to know, like, why did this happen and what was my part? And he's like, that's not going to heal it. You'll still keep repeating the patterns until you go in and feel the actual pain and heal it.
- [47:21]
A
Yeah.
- [47:22]
B
And heal that little kid that's still inside you. You're gonna Keep repeating it. And I'm like, girl, like you.
- [47:30]
A
Yeah. While we're talking, y', all, this really is what it's like to have a conversation with us.
- [47:35]
B
So just. I.
- [47:38]
A
Well, you know, I was on a retreat last week, and somebody came into the retreat and did, like, a little exercise thing. And we had to write down three, like, as if, like, limiting beliefs about yourself. And when I tell you I was crying for, like, 45 minutes, like, exercise was over. We're moved on. And I still have this little lip quiver happening. I'm like, oh, my God. And it's just so interesting when we. Because it is not fun to address those parts of us. Yeah. Need healing and work and, like, I don't know what the. Like, get over it and just get it. That's how it feels. Because I was like, oh, my God. It's. And it feels like brokenness that you didn't know is there. And I. Somehow this can have to do with sibling robbery, but. But it is so interesting, like, how those moments and those feelings that we have that just still need to be healed through those little parts of us rear their head. Yeah.
- [48:38]
B
You think, like, I'm good. I got it. I understand it. It was this, like. Like, okay, moving on. And then it.
- [48:46]
A
Yeah.
- [48:47]
B
Comes back up and you're like, what else? What? How much more work?
- [48:49]
A
I thought I was done.
- [48:50]
B
I thought I got it. I thought I healed it. No, it's still freaking there.
- [48:54]
A
Yeah.
- [48:55]
B
And then it was like, oh. It was like, wounded people attract wounded people. And I was like, oh, God.
- [49:01]
A
Oh, is that our problem?
- [49:02]
B
Yeah, literally. I was like, cool. I really gotta go fix this.
- [49:07]
A
Just too little. Little wounded birds.
- [49:15]
B
Wait, can I ask you what any of those limiting beliefs were or you don't want to get into it?
- [49:19]
A
Actually, yeah. I wrote them in my notes section. I can tell you exactly what I wrote.
- [49:23]
B
Okay. Don't leave me crying here all alone.
- [49:26]
A
I said, I mean, I don't think that I'm gonna cry, but. So the limiting beliefs were. You are statements. Like, if you look in the mirror and you're hard on yourself, and then we were supposed to speak truths that we know but maybe don't feel. And those are I am statements. So anyways. Well, the first one, I hate that I'm gonna say, but I'm going to, because it's in my notes. It was. And the. And the word is not a word I would use to. To someone else because it's so hurtful, but it was. You are fat. But there's a lot to that word that feels things, but that's one of them. You are behind. So, like, just feeling like the rest of the world people, success, like, all the good things, like, I'm just behind. And the other one is, you are not taken seriously. And I've always had this imposter syndrome, even around my friends, that I. I'm there because I'm a good time, but I'm not actually, like, of the same value or don't bring the same value to the table. And I know the difference of feeling and knowing. I know that's not true, but those are still feelings that. When I really sat with it, I was like, oh, my God. I'm like, but. And then my. I am. That. That were positive is I am strong. And, like, the. The. To me saying the I'm fat, it's. I know that I'm not objectively fat, but it's this feeling of, like, not loving my body.
- [51:05]
B
Right.
- [51:06]
A
And that's just the word. And then. So I am strong. I am present in my journey. So instead of being behind, because if. If I always feel behind, I'm always thinking about where other people are instead of experiencing and being where I am and focusing on that. And the other one is that I am respected. I know that there are people who respect me and what I have to say beyond just, like, being the funny guy who says jokes during workouts, you know what I mean? At inopportune times.
- [51:31]
B
Yeah.
- [51:31]
A
So that was the journey I went on. But the emotion behind those words, it was a real thing. And I was like, fuck. I didn't know I was carrying this.
- [51:40]
B
That's heavy stuff.
- [51:41]
A
Yeah.
- [51:41]
B
Like, that really is. But, man, I hope you know that, like, I say this all the time when we sit down. I feel like you're so thoughtful, and I'm not. I don't mean, like, you are thoughtful in a caring way, too, but that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying with, like, your words and how you explain things and the depths that you go to, you just have. I think you have. So I know it's not an. I think. I know you have so much to offer.
- [52:12]
A
Thank you.
- [52:13]
B
And I think it's paired also so well with your humor. But that's what actually makes it even more received and relatable because it's not just, like, you're talking at somebody. It's like, yeah, you're speaking really heartfelt stuff. And when somebody needs it a little lighter, you could drop the joke in there just enough to be like, okay, like, but. But whatever it is. And if anybody understands the body stuff, I get it.
- [52:48]
A
Yeah.
- [52:49]
B
But also I just. It's so funny. I was pulling up photos from all the different programs the other day for. Well, by the time this launches the announce, it'll have already happened. For the fact that there's now the autumn Super Trainer subscription page and for like creating assets and stuff to announce that. And I was like, back in the 80 Day Obsession. Every time I see the 80 Day Obsession photos, I am like, it's not even Donald. And it wasn't like you were in bad shape then. But I just look at your journey and then even when I get to like 21 day fix real time and like you at the start of real time and the end of real time, extreme. So that was like six weeks. Well, seven because we had a week off in between that progression.
- [53:33]
A
Yeah.
- [53:34]
B
And then you get to four weeks for everybody. And I'm like, damn, he was picking up some heavy weights in that. And I'm like, like, you've come so far. But I get it. Like we, we see that we want our bodies a certain way and it's very hard if it's not there. But it's also like we've talked about in other episodes too where it's like the, the effort and what it takes versus what we're willing, like lifestyle.
- [54:03]
A
Yeah.
- [54:03]
B
To do.
- [54:05]
A
And also for me, like also what it means because some people, I'm here if someone has a physical goal, you know, I'm here to help them get to it, use all the resources I have, have one on one sessions with them. But I want to make. Because I think there's this. I don't even know if I. There's words in my mind to it, but when I look this way, fill in the blank, I'll feel this way, fill in the blank. And that's not really true. And some people are obsessed over changing their bodies to change something that they emotionally feel about themselves. And those are sort of two different issues and two different lines of work. And so I think that's the other thing. Like, and to look back at at times, like at my body at times and remember how I felt in it and then how I can feel looking back at it. Like, like the times I was very proud of. Of it. It's like, okay, the issue isn't my body body, because I'm looking at that body. The issue is, is the feeling in it. And I think that's like, it's a parallel separate work. It's Good to do hand in hand. But remembering, just because you have six pack abs doesn't mean your world is suddenly gonna be. It's a little better. Especially if I had one superpower, it'd be being able to eat whatever I wanted without.
- [55:26]
B
Oh, no, those two don't go hand in hand.
- [55:28]
A
Exactly.
- [55:29]
B
What I have found for me, this is just me personally is it's usually for me it's more about the work that I am doing or I'm not doing. And that is where the pride and the confidence comes in. So, like, even if I don't have necessarily like my six pack, most shredded abs, if I know I'm really doing my best, like I'm on plan, I'm following the plan, I'm doing the things, I'm being intentional. It's not about restricting myself or depriving myself, but it's like I'm being intentional with the things I'm doing to get to the goal. Yeah, that's what I have like the most, pride. And that's why when I was a competitor, I mean, yes, my body was like shredded, shredded, chiseled all the things. But it was because I was so laser focused, locked and loaded. Never missed a step, didn't miss a beat. Like in some ways it was almost perfectionism. And I don't, I'm not trying to say that you have to be that way, but for me, it was like I was so in it and it wasn't, it became not hard. Like it didn't feel like I was striving for this perfection. It just felt like, like step one did it, step two did it, step three did it. Like every day, check the box. Like, I, I'm doing it, I'm doing it, I'm doing it. And the more I did it, the better I felt. And the better that I felt and the more I did it, the better I looked at. And then I, you know, then, then the confidence comes because it's like, yes, look, I know exactly what I'm doing. And look at the results coming from it.
- [56:59]
A
Yeah.
- [57:01]
B
And I'll say like, these last two weeks, man, I am all dues. I say not as I am doing, because what I am doing is. I don't know, I. It's weird. It's almost like my schedule's so different right now and I can't really. It's, it's. It on one hand, it doesn't even feel like there's that much to do and then that there's so much to do. Like, I almost get Lost in this. Like, well, I don't have that much to do today. And then I wake up and I'm like, shit, yeah. I have so much to do. And so I'm like, rushing to try to get the workout done. And then it's like, I didn't meal prep or I didn't grocery shop enough, or I just don't have time to cook the thing. And I'm like, well, pot, kettle, black, sitting here telling everybody how to be. It's only been the last, like, two weeks, so I just have to. To get it back in. But. But when I get it, when I'm locked in, that's where the confidence is the highest. It's not even about if my body's at the place I want it to look at. It's that I know I'm doing the work to get it there.
- [57:59]
A
Yeah. That is so true. And when people feel like they're just aimlessly. No, I want this. But if you're not on the journey, because once you're. Once you're on it, it doesn't actually take a long time to start feeling the results. Not just physically seeing them, but. But feeling that difference. Like your life.
- [58:16]
B
You.
- [58:17]
A
You have a life that's working for you, not against you.
- [58:21]
B
Well, and it's usually you working against yourself.
- [58:23]
A
Totally.
- [58:24]
B
It's not like life working against you. I mean, sometimes life's working.
- [58:29]
A
Sometimes she's a. Sometimes.
- [58:31]
B
See you next Tuesday. But you can't be the one working against yourself.
- [58:39]
A
Right.
- [58:39]
B
That's. That's. My stomach is growling so much because I literally haven't even. While we're talking about do as I say, not as I do. This fasting window has definitely been a long one this morning. I'm ready to break it. But, yeah, we have gone all over the place. We just did a world tour.
- [58:59]
A
I needed this, so I hope. I hope someone listening needed this. It was really, really nice.
- [59:06]
B
It was. It was fun. And we were going to have to listen to some more Taylor Swift.
- [59:10]
A
Yeah.
- [59:10]
B
When we're in Nashville.
- [59:12]
A
Yeah. If you're a Taylor Swift fan and you have some kind of, like, groundbreaking Swifty underground meanings behind her album and stuff, let us know, because I love diving into that stuff. You can. You can email us at everythingsperfect podcast.
- [59:29]
B
Podcast.
- [59:30]
A
Thank youmail.com and also our Instagram is Everything's Perfect official. And we'd love to hear from you also if you have stories of experiences with sibling rivalry or anything else that we talked about today, the full gamut we ran.
- [59:45]
B
We went down the river and we just white water rafted.
- [59:48]
A
We sure all the way down. It was a good time.
- [59:50]
B
Little scary.
- [59:53]
A
Yes.
- [59:54]
B
We're here for it. Hopefully this episode recorded.
- [59:58]
A
Yeah. Only one camera's. Just shut up. Off. Okay, that's our. That's our cue.
- [60:05]
B
It was mine.
- [60:06]
A
We're out. Bye, guys.