Everything’s Perfect…Except Texting Is Stressful Now

Summary

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Everything's Perfect…Except Texting Is Stressful Now

Podcast: Everything’s Perfect
Hosts: Autumn Calabrese and Donald Stamper
Episode Air Date: November 4, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Everything’s Perfect" dives into the surprisingly stressful world of modern texting. Autumn and Donald explore how texting and digital communication have gotten complicated, especially around etiquette, punctuation, emojis, and generational lingo. Mixing real talk, witty banter, and personal stories, they unpack the anxieties and misunderstandings that come with today’s messaging habits, all while keeping the tone light, authentic, and funny.

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1. Catch-up & Small Acts of Kindness (01:00–15:55)

Life Updates & Tangents

• Donald and Emily catch up on their week, sharing stories about real estate anxieties (Emily’s air-conditioning drama while selling a house), and property management mishaps (Donald’s renter disaster) [01:23–04:44].
• Both reflect on how acts of kindness from others have helped them navigate tough situations, from dance students helping with repairs to strangers fixing cars for free and neighbors patching tires [05:42–08:48].
• They emphasize that small, unexpected gestures can restore faith in humanity.

Emily (07:17): "It still brings tears to my eyes because it was such a sweet, over-the-top thing. ...It was not like trying to hit on me or anything. It just, it was so sweet.”

Paying It Forward

• Stories about “pay it forward” moments—from a woman buying Emily asparagus at the farmer's market to Donald’s next-door neighbor patching his tire—highlight community and generosity [09:01–10:29].
• The hosts encourage listeners to help others, especially given recent cuts to social assistance programs, underscoring the importance of supporting friends, neighbors, or even strangers in small ways [10:30–11:38].

Donald (10:53): “Now is really the time for those who can help somebody with a bag of groceries… It really is the time to feel the magic of people coming together and helping, because it has changed my life.”

Giving Traditions for the Holidays

• Emily shares her tradition of supporting foster children during the holidays—sending Christmas Eve dinner, gingerbread houses, bikes, and gifts [13:00–14:49].
• Donald describes the "giving tree" idea, where party guests pick ornaments labeled with children’s gift wishes for collective giving [14:49–16:00].
• Hilarity ensues with a family story about poorly labeled gift boxes: “porn” as an abbreviation for "preschool or nursery" [17:29–18:23].

Donald (17:29): "She realized all the boxes that were going to the preschool and nursery age kids said 'porn' on them..."

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2. The Minefield of Modern Texting (18:46–43:52)

Punctuation & Tone in Texts

• The conversation pivots to how punctuation, especially periods, dramatically change the tone of a text [19:00–24:17].
• Donald admits to using exclamation points excessively and confesses to relying on ellipses without knowing the term until recently [20:00–21:08].
• ‘Periods’ at the end of short text responses feel “aggressive” or “formal” and can give the impression something is wrong.

Donald (23:41): “But how do you take it? ...Like, somebody put periods at the end of their sentence and you’re like, so you hate me?”

• They tease about overanalysis—taking "Thank you." vs. "Thank you!" to mean the difference between genuine gratitude and passive-aggression [23:49–24:17].
• Donald reads a deadpan text exchange filled with dry periods, making Emily laugh about how stressful minimal punctuation can seem [24:54–25:42].

Emojis: To Use Or Not To Use?

• Both agree emojis are key to clarifying tone, but they worry about overuse making them look immature or unprofessional—especially in new work or dating scenarios [26:00–27:27].
• Emily shares she piles on emojis (“heart and a smiley blushing face and exclamation point and rainbows…”) to assure people she’s being friendly or joking [26:47–27:13].

Emily (26:47): “I need to make sure you know I’m not being mean.”

Most-Used Emojis & Trends

• They compare their most-used emojis live on air. Donald favors the “heart hands” for softer affection with friends; Emily’s go-tos are “smiling blushy face” and “laughing face” [29:14–32:04].
• They discuss generational shifts in emoji meanings (e.g., “peace signs and duck lips” becoming uncool), and how even simple symbols spark debate (thumbs-up, heart, okay hand) [29:53–30:09, 34:45–35:59].
• Donald jokes he’s “one meme away from being a meme” when using emojis incorrectly.

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3. Texting Etiquette: The Written Rules (37:13–43:52)

Texting Manners

• Emily vents about “serial texters” sending single-line messages as separate texts, causing notification overload: "ding, ding, ding” [37:24–39:09].
• They offer guidelines:
  • Multiple single-sentence texts = anxiety
  • Four or fewer sentences? One text bubble.
  • Five or more? Break into two—if much longer, opt for a voice memo or call.

Emily (39:09): “You have to understand the etiquette of when to use these things…”

• Long paragraphs via text are discouraged; break down logistics-heavy conversations into voice memos or real-time calls [39:55–41:20].
• Voice memos over two minutes are considered too long—just pick up the phone!

Group Text Nuances & Overwhelm

• In group chats (like for their podcast), voice memos can be handy for efficient communication when scheduling a call is too complicated [42:18–43:38].
• Donald jokes about his low “bandwidth for messages” and how easily they both get overwhelmed.

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4. Abbreviations, Acronyms & Gen-Z Lingo (43:56–59:41)

Classic Text Abbreviations

• Emily’s quizzed on standard acronyms: LOL, BRB, IDK, SMH, IMO, IMHO, FYI, TBH, and more; she breezes through them [47:03–47:39].
• They poke fun at how “in my honest opinion” is code for “go f yourself” [01:00, 47:20–47:24].

New Slang & Generational Disconnect

• Donald brings AI-generated examples, including abbreviations they find suspicious or confusing (e.g., “BFFR” = “Be for real”; “IYKYK” = “If you know, you know”; “FRFR” = “For real, for real”) [48:21–49:39].
• They question abbreviations that butcher spelling ("HBU" for "How about you?").
• Autumn highlights how fast new lingo emerges that even their kids are wary of them using—words like “aura,” “no cap,” “mid,” “rizz” (charisma), “drip” (style), and “skibidi” (undefined, context-driven) [50:23–55:36].

Emily (51:36): “If you do something stupid, you lost your aura. Or if you do something really cool, you’re like, I have all the aura.”

Notable Laughs

• Emily’s story of sending surprise NSFW photos to a coworker during meetings for pure mischief [33:05–34:26].
• Unpacking odd new terms—“my ball” as a Gen Z endearment, which the hosts find hilarious and unflattering [57:31–59:15].

Donald (58:06): “If I had a significant other calling up their ball… We’re breaking up. So. No, not your ball.”

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5. Takeaways, Listener Engagement, & Final Laughs (59:30–End)

• The hosts both admit to feeling a bit “dumber” for knowing some of the new lingo, but also remind listeners not to stress about not keeping up [59:34].
• They invite listeners to send in communication horror stories (but "never send us a period" in a text or email!) [59:41–59:55].
• Contact info and show social media is shared for fan interaction and questions.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the stress of periods in texting:
  • Donald (23:41): “...somebody put periods at the end of their sentence and you’re like, so you hate me?”
• On emoji overuse:
  • Emily (26:47): “I need to make sure you know I’m not being mean.”
• On 'my ball' lingo:
  • Donald (58:06): “If I had a significant other calling up their ball… We’re breaking up. So. No, not your ball.”
• On generational slang:
  • Emily (51:36): “...if you do something really cool, you’re like, I have all the aura.”

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Key Timestamps

• Real estate & property mishaps: 01:23–05:35
• Kindness & giving stories: 07:06–16:07
• Texting & punctuation woes: 19:00–24:17
• Emoji usage & decoding: 26:00–32:04
• Texting etiquette & voice memo tips: 37:13–43:52
• Abbreviation Quiz & Gen-Z slang: 43:56–55:36
• Unpacking new lingo ("my ball"): 57:31–59:30

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Episode Tone & Takeaway

Warm, self-deprecating, and peppered with hilarious asides, this episode is both cathartic and insightful for anyone who’s felt stressed by a simple “k.” For both fellow millennials anxious about a period or Gen Zers looking to outfox their parents’ emoji game, Autumn and Donald remind us that digital communication is tricky—and none of us are doing it perfectly.

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Connect with Everything’s Perfect:

• Email: [e-mail]
• Instagram: @everythingsperfectofficial

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Transcript

[Donald]

Limu Emu and Doug.

[Narrator]

Here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Emily]

Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us.

[Narrator]

Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty Liberty Liberty Liberty Savings vary unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates excludes.

[Donald]

Massachusetts this is the story of the 1. As head of maintenance at a concert hall, he knows the show must always go on. That's why he works behind the scenes, ensuring every light is working, the H Vac is humming, and his facility shines with Grainger's supplies and solutions for every challenge he faces. Plus 24. 7 customer support. His venue never misses a beat. Call quickgranger.com or just stop by Grange Stranger for the ones who get it done.

[Emily]

In my honest opinion, which basically means go yourself.

[Donald]

Exactly. In my honest opinion, you're an idiot. So welcome back. Oh, my God. So good to be back. How was your week?

[Emily]

This is. This has been the week that has not ended. It went on and on. This is the song that. I swear to God, that was my week. I was like, I can't figure out what day it is. I can't figure out what I did on what day. I think it was good.

[Donald]

That's my life.

[Emily]

Except today.

[Donald]

Oh, no, that was not bad.

[Emily]

Except every day. No. I'm selling the Florida house. We're getting really close to the end. And you know, Murphy's Law, man. The realtor called me today and was like, there's an issue with the air conditioning. Da, da, da. We have to replace the unit.

[Donald]

Oh, my gosh.

[Emily]

We were like trying to. We fixed it last week. And they're like, the fix didn't work. It needs to be replaced. And I'm like, these H VAC units are not cheap. So it's super frustrating to have to sell or have to buy a brand new H Vac.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

When the house is going to sell in three weeks.

[Donald]

Yeah. That's so annoying.

[Emily]

But you gotta do it.

[Donald]

I can't be shady. That I sure would. I get some Elmer's. I'd be like. I'd be like, step aside, motherfuckers. I'm gonna fix this shit. I've seen some things. I'm one YouTube video away from being able to handle this myself.

[Emily]

Well, it's on the second floor and it kept leaking. So that's a real problem. Because if you get water leaking through the ceiling downstairs. That is a no bueno situation.

[Donald]

I owned a condo one time in my hometown, okay? And it was a really old building. It felt like European style building, just no elevator. Mine was on the top floor. There was only three floors, so third floor, middle floor, main floor, and then a basement. And anyways, I was traveling and I got a call. I had renters that just leaved and they trashed the place. I didn't know that happened. This is how I found out. I got a call that my bathtub overflowed and leaked down to the people's to both con the second floor, the first floor and into the basement. And I said, oh my gosh, girl, you're gonna have to call somebody else. Got that kind of money, shouldn't have sold it to me. You should have done some. You should have done your due diligence. Leaking from the bathtub into two condos, that's a. That's a problem outside of my capacity to fix. Honey, good luck.

[Emily]

But did you not have insurance?

[Donald]

Insurance? It's a sham. But a. I don't fall for that kind of false advertising.

[Emily]

So you can't get it in la, swear to God.

[Donald]

Yeah, right.

[Emily]

This isn't even what the podcast is supposed to be about today. Don't get me started on insurance though. For real.

[Donald]

Oh my God. And let me just for this story, when I got to my condo, first of all, thank God the person right under me was like in no position to complain about anything. Their place was trashed. When they went and looked like, okay, like I help. I my water from the bathroom.

[Emily]

Clean your walls.

[Donald]

And the first one, the damage was literally like a hairdryer fixed it so it was fine, but I was so stressed. And I came in and it was a beautiful 100 year old. Had original like French doors that open to the balcony that were wooden. It was so cool. It felt like almost like a apartment you'd imagine in Paris or something. This who I rented to, who I was. So nice, terrible landlord because I'd be like, oh, you don't have the money. Oh, I get it.

[Emily]

Oh my God.

[Donald]

It was bad. So she owed me for like two months rent, disappeared, left all her. There was dog pee and poop everywhere.

[Emily]

Ew.

[Donald]

And she would take incense. She was shoving it in like the frame, between the frame and the wall. And so there are all these burn marks going down the wall where she lit incense. I was like, she could have burnt the whole freaking place down and you.

[Emily]

Wouldn'T have had insurance. Yeah, ding dong.

[Donald]

So anyways, that was my next way of calling you.

[Emily]

Yeah. So here we are.

[Donald]

Anyways, many years later, I called one of my dance students who happened to a property management repair company, and girl, that was the best connection I ever had. At that moment, I was like, thank you so much. She resanded my wood floors and everything.

[Emily]

Wow.

[Donald]

Just as a. She's like, you taught me the magic of dance and I just want to help you. I was like, oh, my God.

[Emily]

Oh, my God. Wait, that reminds me of. Okay, so when I worked at Equinox. We are so off the topic right now. But this is such a good story. And I literally forgot about this until you just said that I worked at Equinox and I was there for like five years. You know, I was there 24, seven. Literally. I worked like 14 hours a day. And I knew a lot of the members, even if I wasn't training them. You know, you just talk to people so nice. And there was this one gentleman there, he always just said hi to me. Like, slightly older gentleman, super nice. Worked at a Honda dealership. And I drove a Honda and somebody had backed into my front end in a parking lot. So the damage wasn't horrible, but it was there. But I wasn't gonna pay to fix it. Like, out of all the things I needed to worry about, that was the least of them. And I remember one day before Christmas, he asked me. I forget if he just asked me. He was like, something about like, let me just take it to the dealership and get it cleaned up for you or something like that, like. And I was like, no, no, no, you don't have to do that. And he's like, no, no, no. Just like, you're here. How long are you here for? And I was like, a couple hours. And he's like, I'm just gonna take it over. I'm gonna have him like, wash it all up real nice for you. Da, da. And I was like, oh, my God, that's so sweet of you. I go there to pick it up. It has a giant red bow on it. And they completely fix the front end for free.

[Donald]

That is so.

[Emily]

And he's like, you work so hard. I see you here every day, all day. I know you bring your son into kids club and he's like, I really just wanted to do something nice for you. There was like, no strings attached. It's.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

It was not like trying to hit on me or anything. It like, still brings tears to my eyes because it was like such a sweet over the top thing. And again, it wasn't like the front end was smashed in, but it was like this crack that the way they backed in the hood, like the front piece of the hood was pushed in and just cracked a little bit.

[Donald]

And it was fixed.

[Emily]

And it was fixed.

[Donald]

That is so okay. Well, speaking of good fucking Samaritans, I grew up so in Ohio, you know, like, it's different than la. The houses, especially the older houses are kind of all the same with a little different front porches. They're all like kind of close to each other on the out. Like I was lived in the city, on the outskirts of the city. So anyways, my next door neighbor, I. I was driving, I had a Mini Cooper convertible and I loved it, but I got a flat and I was so annoyed and so I called this company to come and patch the flat and I parked my car behind in our alley where our garage was. So anyways, the person got there to fix my tire and he was like, I. He came and got me. He was like, I don't see any flat tire. I was like, it was like rubber on the ground, flat. And I went back and all my tires were full and there was a note on my hood from my next door neighbor who said, I saw your tire was flat. I had a patching kit, so I went ahead and patched it for you. And I was like, the world really is a beautiful place sometimes.

[Emily]

Gosh.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

You know what? That's awesome. I love that.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Like, was the neighbor older than you or younger, same age?

[Donald]

The neighbor who did it, What? It was when I lived with my parents and he was my parents age, like 20 years older than me. So a young parent.

[Emily]

Yeah. Yeah, because it's the older generation. These kids today, they don't know nothing about being one more story. So I lived in the Pacific Palisades, like when Dom was essentially like six months to like one and a half. And there was a farmer's market up there every Sunday. And I remember like I had him in the stroller walking through the farmer's market. And the Palisades is a very, very wealthy neighborhood. Now. I was not very wealthy.

[Donald]

That's where you got your imposter syndrome from, right?

[Emily]

For real. Like we lived in an apartment. But so many of my clients were in the Palisades. It made sense to try to live there because I could see. See more clients because I didn't have to drive back and forth and I could check in on Dom in between clients because it was a smaller neighborhood. But anyways, Farmer's Market. I'm buying some veggies and stuff. I know ptsd, checking that audio. And this older woman, like, probably in her 70s. Like, I was buying, like, a bundle of asparagus or something, so, like, not expensive. And she just steps up and she's like, can I buy that for you today? And I was like, what? And she was like, I would really like to just. To just buy that for you. I mean, we're talking like, three or four dollars.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

And I was like, you don't have to do that. And she's like, I would really like to. And I was like, you know, it's almost that weird, like, uncomfortable. Like, do I look for.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

But no, it was just so sweet. You could tell it was like, something she liked to do. Like, just a little way to pay it forward.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

And it was just so sweet.

[Donald]

I love doing that. I love those little things, seeing it happen. I was actually thinking, because I saw how some people. I don't. I'm not like, this isn't a subject matter, but I had this thought today because I just saw someone on Instagram, and I don't know a lot about this, but apparently because of something, like, some people's SNAP benefits are going away, which is like.

[Emily]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Donald]

So anyways, I. I'm not educated enough to talk about that, but I thought now is really the time for those who can help somebody with a bag of groceries, who reach out, check on your friends, check on your neighbors, like, if you have extra and someone you know is struggling for gas money. It really is the time to feel the magic of people coming together and helping, because it has changed my life. There's all these times I can look and be like, damn. And it. It's not even just like, there's different levels how that's happened for me monetarily, but it all means the same. Like, it all is just so meaningful that someone has that intention.

[Emily]

It just makes you feel like you said, like, oh, my God, the world isn't a horrible place.

[Donald]

Right.

[Emily]

Well, I got a text from one of our friends the other day, Fran, and she's like, good morning, my friend. I hope you're having a good day. And she's like, every day I pick a random person from my. Basically, like, her phone list to pray for. And she's like, you came up today, so is there anything you'd like? Oh, my God. Literally makes me cry because I'm like, it's the sweetest thing. I was like, oh, my God, Fran, you are the sweetest thing. Ever. She's like, anything you want me to pray for? So I did. I was like, that is so sweet. Could you pray for da da da da? And she's like, got it. So even that isn't a monetary thing. But it was such a. And I talked to like we text all the time. But just that extra little like hey, let me throw a little something prayer wise your way. I just thought was so sweet.

[Donald]

It's so sweet. I mean I was thinking about. And I really do believe also in order to receive like that goodness and positive energy in your life, you also have to give it. It's a flow. Yeah, that, that goes so well every.

[Emily]

Time this, every like holiday season. For the last. I think it's been four years now. Emily and I, because Emily was a foster child. I was not. But we were not.

[Donald]

I was gonna say a bad joke. Sometimes you wished you were. I don't mean that.

[Emily]

Anywho, awkward silence. But we definitely, you know, there were definitely years where we did not have much. Like we were always taking care of roof over our head, food on the plate. There was always presents under the tree. But not always like a lot. Fine, whatever. But anyways, Emily was a foster child, so she started doing lists for foster kids. And I was like, oh my gosh, send me a foster house. Like a, like a home. I want to do the whole home. So I will send Christmas Eve dinner. Like I'll have it catered. I ask how many kids total are there. I send gingerbread houses for every kid so that they have an activity to do on Christmas Eve. And then I literally try to get everything on their lists. Now some kids go above and beyond and they're like, I want an iPad and I want a cell phone. I'm like, okay, hold on.

[Donald]

Ok. Okay.

[Emily]

But I really like because you know, like first of all, some of the lists just break your heart. They're asking for socks, right? And you're like, oh my gosh. What? Please pick. Yes, you can have socks. Of course. Please add to this. But like last year there were a couple kids that had bikes on their lists. And I was like, oh fuck. Yeah, I'm getting them their bikes. Can you imagine? Like you're a foster kid, you don't think you're getting anything.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

And you're getting a bike. Bike. And I'm like. The part that kills me though is I just want to see their faces. I know selfishly I not. I don't need them say anything. I just wish I could see their faces when they know that somebody actually did that for them to care and get them something. But I love doing it. Like even though I know I don't get to see it, in my mind I could see these kids getting to open up the things that they just did not imagine they would get that were on that list. And I love that so much. It's so fun.

[Donald]

My mom did, she used to organize something. It was actually when we worked at a church. But I thought I would like to pick up this tradition with like friends and have a. Basically you have a Christmas party like right after Thanksgiving and at the party. So my mom organized this, they had a giving tree where all of the ornaments were. It was a kid's name tag and it had like something they would like and you can make it a dollar amount. So you could, you depending, you could say you know, $100 or less or something. Cuz each person could, you could pick two, but you could just get one kid's name. But you have a party and everyone knows that you are going to the giving tree. You take, you pick one of those ornaments and then you return it as the name tag to the gift you bought. And I think that's so cool because it's collective, like you're not responsible. One person doesn't have to be responsible for all of those kids, but everybody can come together and to give. Isn't that a cool idea?

[Emily]

Can we do that?

[Donald]

We should do that. Yeah. And I need help organizing it. So I think that we should. Yes, we should do that because it's so cool, I think.

[Emily]

And so what? Like so they all take it, they go get the gift and then on a different day they sort of drop them off.

[Donald]

Right.

[Emily]

And then we would just deliver the gifts to the church.

[Donald]

Exactly. Okay, exactly. Or who? Whatever organization.

[Emily]

Or whatever organization.

[Donald]

And then just one more gift story. We can move on. My mom also when she worked at church just took donations for age groups one year. And so preschool and nursery were one age group and so it wasn't kids specific. So my mom was like riding on the. She was wrapping the gifts and she was riding on the boxes. What?

[Narrator]

And Doug, here we have the limu emu in its natural habitat helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Emily]

Uh, limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us.

[Narrator]

Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty, Liberty Liberty Liberty Savings vary underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company and affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts.

[Emily]

This is the story of the 1. As a custodial supervisor at a high school, he knows that during cold and flu season, germs spread fast. It's why he partners with Grainger to stay fully stocked on the products and supplies he needs, from tissues to disinfectants to floor scrubbers, all so that he can help students, staff, and teachers stay healthy and focused. Call 1-800-GRAINGER Click grainger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done.

[Donald]

Age group each gift would go to, and if it was preschool or nursery, she'd write P or N on the box. And then she realized all the boxes that were going to the preschool and nursery age kids said porn on them because she met preschool or nursery, but she wrote out P O, R, N. Hilarious. I was like, oh, my God, why do all these boxes say porn? She was like, it's not so funny.

[Emily]

Oh, my God.

[Donald]

I was like, you can't make this shit.

[Emily]

She didn't recognize that as she was writing.

[Donald]

She's nice, innocent ladies. She was like, oh.

[Emily]

She's like, I'm just telling him what I'm giving to the preschoolers and nursery. Here's a box of porn.

[Donald]

Like, oh, wow.

[Emily]

Can you imagine? Like, the nuns are like, we can't accept.

[Donald]

Yeah, what is this anyway?

[Emily]

Oh, my God.

[Donald]

That's good.

[Emily]

Okay, well, I like where we open this episode.

[Donald]

I know. Feeling good.

[Emily]

I know. And we're gonna do something good. We are gonna do it. Our follow through sucks, Donald.

[Donald]

It sure does. That's also something that's part of. That's part of my brand. I don't know what it is. So not a part of mine, but intention is there.

[Emily]

Okay, great.

[Donald]

Follow through.

[Emily]

Follow through.

[Donald]

Okay. Speaking of follow through.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Donald]

We said. I think it was a couple episodes ago. We talked about the whole confusion when it comes to emojis. Texting situations mean you put a period at the end.

[Emily]

Oh, God, kill me an.

[Donald]

Excuse me, what did I do to you?

[Emily]

Off then.

[Donald]

So I think it would be fun for us to dive in.

[Emily]

Yeah, we gotta finish that one. Because I had so many thoughts, my head was exploding. And now every time I text or heart or thumbs up something, I'm like, wait, if they listen to the episode. And I said a thumbs up is a you, are they gonna think I'm.

[Donald]

Saying, oh, my God. That happened to me because I realized we said this was an emails but or something where it said oh, per my fill in the blank. And I use that. I was like, oh, my God. Everyone's going to think I meant, like, if you weren't fucking listening, case you.

[Emily]

Missed it the first time.

[Donald]

But it is so true. Like things. So my biggest fault because of this is I use literally, like, exclamation marks in every. Like, sentences that just do not need it.

[Emily]

You are just always.

[Donald]

I'll go back and look and I'm like, why do I have spirit fingers in this email? Like, everywhere? It's like, yes. I can't wait. This is so great. I'm so excited. It's like, okay, Donald, I don't like me in this email way too much. Find some balance.

[Emily]

Okay, so first, let's go with emojis. Because. Because. Or not emojis, but texting. Well, all the things. Texting. Because email, text, they're a little different. So first things first. We said punctuation. Do you or don't you use it when you text?

[Donald]

I use it. I. I never ask a question without a question mark. That's obvious. I think.

[Emily]

I think a lot of times I put the question mark on there. But I think sometimes maybe if I'm going fast, I don't see.

[Donald]

I think you tell me something, you might be asking me something, and it gets real confusing. And I use a lot of exclamation marks.

[Emily]

We've established great.

[Donald]

Exclamation mark. And I use a lot of ellipses.

[Emily]

Oh.

[Donald]

And I didn't even know what ellipses were. So just in case anyone else is as uneducated as I am, they're the dots. Like, dot, dot, dot.

[Emily]

Right.

[Donald]

Yeah. Okay.

[Emily]

Right. No, I don't know. I have no idea. I was just gonna pretend like I.

[Donald]

Knew until that trending audio that was like, do you have any kids? And it was like, ellipses. And it's because the text goes dot, dot, dot. So it is. That's an ellipses. If anyone doesn't know.

[Emily]

Okay. I don't even know what that trending audio is, but all right, me, I'm old.

[Donald]

Like, what's it? Trending audio.

[Emily]

Seriously.

[Donald]

But yeah, I use that. I use that quite often in punctuation.

[Emily]

Basically is like, so on. Yeah. And so on and so forth.

[Donald]

And that's how I. Yeah.

[Emily]

Or I use it as a. Like, so.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

And then I hit him with the next point. That's like, boom.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

But these kids today, like, Dominic asked me, he's like, do you put periods? Like, what is wrong with you? And I'm like, first of all, what's wrong with you? That's one long run. On sentence. Like I don't even know where you took a breath in that sentence.

[Donald]

Exactly.

[Emily]

And sometimes if you're missing a comma, it matters different.

[Donald]

It totally.

[Emily]

So I'm like, you need punctuation sometimes. But yes. If it's a short sentence and there's a period on the end. Especially if it's like a one liner with a period.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Why. Why are you so aggressive? Settle down.

[Donald]

Yeah. If it's too formal with punctuation and text, I'm like, what is this? What's happening? What did I do wrong? Why are we. Yeah. Whoa.

[Emily]

Stop raising your voice. Yeah, but there is. It depends on who you're texting. Right. So if it's you and I texting. Whatever. By the way, if it's you and I texting, there's 17 smelling errors and you'll figure it out.

[Donald]

Also, hope no one's looking over my shoulder because that is. That is for our eyes only, honey.

[Emily]

Highway to the danger zone.

[Donald]

That's right. Don't be looking at something you don't want to see.

[Emily]

You've got the protective screen on yours.

[Donald]

And sometimes I'm sure I do.

[Emily]

I put that on for a split second. I was like, I can't see shit on this phone ever.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Like, you have to be looking right at it. Yeah.

[Donald]

If it turns left or right.

[Emily]

I was like, I can't be doing this too much. So people could be reading over my shoulder.

[Donald]

Yeah. Risky business.

[Emily]

They've seen some things. But yeah. So if I'm texting you, I'm definitely not checking my punctuation.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Probably not using it very much unless I really am excited.

[Donald]

Yeah. I don't think I use periods. That's the biggest one I don't use.

[Emily]

But how do you take it? Like if somebody, like you made the joke the other day. Like somebody put periods at the end of their sentence and you're like, so you hate me?

[Donald]

Yeah. I take it as like they're. So if someone says thank you so much with a period, I'm like, they don't. They're actually not happy with what I did. Like, this is a very matter of fact. They're doing the appropriate thing by saying thank you.

[Emily]

First of all, if you're gonna say thank you so much, exclamation point.

[Donald]

Right.

[Emily]

Because so much means, like a lot. That deserves not a period, but an exclamation.

[Donald]

Right, I agree.

[Emily]

Learn your punctuation if you're gonna use it.

[Donald]

Actually what it was. So the specific example I gave the other day, that was A period is. Someone was asking about one of our episodes.

[Emily]

Yes.

[Donald]

And I was like, I'm not sure which one. I'll look it up. And she said. I think she said it was either I found it period. And that was it.

[Emily]

You said. What you said was, she said, I found it, period, listening to it, period, or listen to it period. And so your response, you basically were like, so you hate it. Great. Cool.

[Donald]

Yes. I was like, this is. I'm not feeling great about myself right now.

[Emily]

Okay. I have another.

[Donald]

Oh, it was this. It was this. There's two periods, and she listens to this. And you know who you are, girl. I love you. But she said. I said, so I did use a period. I said, I'm sorry, I just saw your last text period. Do you mean the episode question mark? And she was like, I found it, period. I watched it and watched it, period. No mention of what she thought of it. No, it was awesome. Until I later said, what did you think? And along 50 minutes later. Not 1-550. I liked it, period. I thought you guys were great, period. I'm like, I'm need more than a period here.

[Emily]

Who is this?

[Donald]

I can't say. She's actually.

[Emily]

Is it somebody I know?

[Donald]

No, she's. She's one of my clients, and we've been working together a long time, so I also consider her. But those periods, girl, gotta beat a sweat.

[Emily]

Throw an exclamation point in there.

[Donald]

You're right.

[Emily]

Look, excitement and emoji.

[Donald]

Something. An emoji. Yes. Okay.

[Emily]

Speaking of emojis.

[Donald]

Uhhuh.

[Emily]

Do you use emojis a lot or No?

[Donald]

I think I use them regularly. I don't know what constitutes a lot, but I do use them regularly, so.

[Emily]

I think I would. I don't use. Like, I use them regularly as well. I don't necessarily use them. Like, every single thing I say is emojis or, oh, I only send emojis in responses, but I do think I use them a lot. And sometimes I catch myself because I use them to make sure people know, like, I'm not being angry or judgments are serious or what. Like, this is a joke. Please understand it's a joke because the tone can get taken out of context in a text all the time.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

And I have had it happen to me multiple times where, like, I think I'm saying one thing and in my head it says one thing and somebody else takes it very differently. And I'm like, oh, my God, that's not what I meant at all. And I'm like, so you gotta throw a freaking emoji on there. It needs a heart and a smiley blushing face and exclamation point and rainbows. All the things sunshine and universe shoot out of your ass. Shoot out lucky charms out of the universe. But because I need to make sure you know I'm not being mean.

[Donald]

Yes.

[Emily]

So I do use them a lot. But then I sometimes think, especially cuz like dating world, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, I don't want guys to think I'm like an airhead.

[Donald]

Right.

[Emily]

Just dropping emojis left and right.

[Donald]

That is interesting.

[Emily]

It's like one of those things where it's like, again, when it's work, are emojis appropriate? Not appropriate. I mean, with my friends, I'll send you. Yeah, all day long. But if it's more acquaintance or work or somebody you've just met or you're getting to know.

[Narrator]

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[Emily]

Uh, limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us.

[Narrator]

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[Emily]

A little.

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[Emily]

How many emojis are too many emojis? Like, how often is too often?

[Donald]

Yeah, that's a good question. I think it does depend on the person. I. If I asked you, what is your most used emoji, does one come to mind? We could. We should look at our phones and see what our saved emojis are. But before you do, okay, does one emoji? Because I know it goes through, but I have one in my mind that I think I use most right now.

[Emily]

I. I mean, in general, I think probably like the smiling blushy face or the laughing face.

[Donald]

Mm, the laughing face is probably my second most. You know what I use the most are the heart hands.

[Emily]

Oh, really?

[Donald]

Because I feel like they're less like you use a. The actual Heart emoji with your friends or like, with net. I would use it with my boyfriend or something like that. But the heart hands is like a. In my mind. It's like, oh, I love you so much.

[Emily]

First of all, this isn't even how you do it anymore. What's that weird way they do it?

[Donald]

Careful, you're gonna make a gang sign.

[Emily]

I know, I know. But don't they. The kids make it some. I don't know how they do it.

[Donald]

I don't know.

[Emily]

It's like this knuckle. I don't remember, but it's.

[Donald]

I'm like, you're trying to make things hard.

[Emily]

I know. Come on, guys.

[Donald]

Right? And we're not supposed to do peace signs anymore.

[Emily]

Why?

[Donald]

Like, it's just. It's just what old people do.

[Emily]

Peace signs and duck lips.

[Donald]

Yeah, that's me. I can't help it. So I think mine is the. Is the heart hands most used.

[Emily]

Okay, let's check.

[Donald]

Let's look at our.

[Emily]

Mine is.

[Donald]

Do you just look by going in a text and then acting like you're gonna put an emoji.

[Emily]

Mine is. Okay, my top row. And I. I would assume that. So the laughing face, the crazy face where the googly eyes and the tongue out, like.

[Donald]

Huh?

[Emily]

Matcha of the laughing really hard face. Heart, heart eyes. A wink. One of my ones most used is the, like, the stressed face. The, like.

[Donald]

Yeah, mine too. I'm with you. Yeah. I have. So the heart hands.

[Emily]

Okay.

[Donald]

The thing is, I'm a little confused about because this is not in the order that I most use them, in my opinion.

[Emily]

But the question is, does the order go down or does it go across?

[Donald]

So. Because I feel like I'm looking to see if I text different people, if it shows up differently. I don't think it would. Okay. I think it might go down.

[Emily]

I think it goes down.

[Donald]

I have so on my first line going down, I have the laugh with tears coming out smile emoji. I have the hand clap emoji. Because I do use that a lot. Like, instead of being like, yeah, yes. It's my. You know, I throw that on the end so they know I'm applauding.

[Emily]

Okay.

[Donald]

For some reason, this is why I'm confused. I have this sticker of my Halloween costume.

[Emily]

My. There. I have a sticker too. And I think that it must just.

[Donald]

Go in that spot when you save.

[Emily]

It or something, because I don't use that sticker ever.

[Donald]

And then my heart hands.

[Emily]

Okay.

[Donald]

But I do have a sticker that I Use a lot just to be funny, which is.

[Emily]

Oh, no, better not be a me.

[Donald]

I realized I was not in the a text thread that I would like to accidentally send this sticker to. And you're gonna get why. No, we'll put it on screen. No, I didn't. Okay, I'm gonna show it to you, though, and I'll put it on the screen so everybody else can see. I just think it's so funny.

[Emily]

Oh, my gosh. Yes. We're gonna have to, like, someone watch if you want to know what it is.

[Donald]

Like, are you almost ready? And I'll send that. Like, ready.

[Emily]

So I've never gotten that from you, so I think I'm offended.

[Donald]

You've never got that from me.

[Emily]

Literally never.

[Donald]

Well, buckle up, buttercup. So. Yeah, but most of my emojis are. I also use the one that's, like, tears welling up in your eyes. Like, if someone says something really nice like, oh, I'm gonna cry. But, yeah, there's a lot of power in these emojis.

[Emily]

There is. I just thought of a funny story. It's not about emojis, but it is about texting.

[Donald]

Lay it on me.

[Emily]

Well, so we used to have an office, Like, a big office for work. Like, hundreds of people were at the office all the time. And we were always in big meetings.

[Donald]

Yeah, a beautiful office.

[Emily]

Yes. And we were always in big meetings. Like, 12, 15 people in the meeting. I can say this now because she doesn't work at the company anymore, and I love her to death, but. So one of the people that was on my team, I get. I'll say her first name because, well, whatever. It's fine. Surely we would mess with each other in meetings. Like, you know, like, we were always paying attention, but sometimes people going on. On it didn't even pertain to us. And we would just text because our phones were on quiet, so we knew it wasn't going to make a noise. But, like, the most inappropriate, like, just. We hit each other with, like, a random, like, grab a dick pic off the Internet.

[Donald]

Oh, wow.

[Emily]

So you're sitting at the round conference table, and I would just, like, shoot her the photo, but she doesn't know that's what's coming through. So she just sees it's a text from me. She probably thinks I'm commenting about whatever is going on. And she opens it. And so it's like, can you wait to see their reaction? Because they can't laugh.

[Donald]

Oh, my God.

[Emily]

It's like everybody's in the room.

[Donald]

That's Y' all are sick.

[Emily]

Oh, I miss her. We had the best time. It was so funny because you would just. You didn't know we would go weeks, months without doing it. And then all sudden, you open your.

[Donald]

Phone, you're like, that's funny. She was one of the first people I met when I came to visit you. She came to dinner with us.

[Emily]

Oh, my God.

[Donald]

I could just picture you too.

[Emily]

She is a riot. Okay, question about an emoji.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

I'm gonna refer to it as the okay sign so that people listening, not watching, understand what we're talking about.

[Donald]

You mean the hand okay sign?

[Emily]

Because everybody's like, yeah, that's the okay sign. But if you look at it, it's more pinching. It's not. The fingers are not closed. Limu imu.

[Narrator]

And, Doug, here we have the limu emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug.

[Emily]

Uh, limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us.

[Narrator]

Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty, Liberty, Liberty. Liberty Savings. Very underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company Affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts.

[Emily]

The fingers are, like, slightly open like this. So there's been debate. Is it, does that emoji mean okay, or does that emoji mean I am this fudgeing close?

[Donald]

Where it gets confusing. I think it means okay.

[Emily]

I think so too. But I'm just saying, people say it means I'm this close, but it does.

[Donald]

Look like teeny, tiny little bit like it does look like.

[Emily]

Like you could use it and be like this. Like you could use it like that. I do laugh when people try to say that the emoji was ice cream. I was like, don't you send me that. Asking me if I want to go. I'm like, there is an ice cream cone.

[Donald]

Look, if you type. If I type ice cream in my emoji search, proper ice cream comes, right?

[Emily]

The crap poop, it comes up, Right? So it was clearly intended to be the emoji, just in case you were wondering.

[Donald]

This is so wild. You know what emoji I don't understand is this one where the hand goes. The hands just kind of sticking out and the fingers are dangling.

[Emily]

Huh.

[Donald]

I just saw that the other day. I was like that. What kind of magical hand of God like. Or creep. It also gives, like. I don't. I don't know.

[Emily]

I don't know what that was.

[Donald]

Someone would use that for I don't know.

[Emily]

There are a lot of emojis in here that I'm just like, I don't get them.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Okay. Let's move on, shall we, from emojis, Unless there's one that you really want to go in on.

[Donald]

Well, you know, I also use the eggplant and peach sometimes, but other than that.

[Emily]

And water, obviously.

[Donald]

Obviously. Water squirting is just, you know, casual, sometimes mochi conversation.

[Emily]

If you're not trying to spell it out, you're going to picture it out. That's fine. Okay, so texting. I feel like. Oh, let me say two more things about texting. I kind of said this when we were talking about it last time. But first of all, y', all, there is texting etiquette. Don't text me four single sentences at a time. One sentence send. Another sentence sent. I don't. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Holy. Is the world blowing up?

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Say it all at once.

[Donald]

Yeah. I almost did that to you today. I literally didn't send you a text today. Well, you. I'm gonna be one of those. But I already text you twice, and I was like, in a row? Yeah.

[Emily]

Oh, my God, I just ate the microphone.

[Donald]

Yeah. And I was like, donald, you're being one of those people.

[Emily]

No. Okay, first of all, you can always listen. You have a free pass to be.

[Donald]

That person, to be an annoying bitch.

[Emily]

Oh. Because you said, should we just say noon or even 12:30? I don't want you to be rushed. Let me know when it's good for you.

[Donald]

And I was gonna send one more. And I was like, I think you've made your point. I think this is enough information.

[Emily]

It's just, Listen, if it's only one person texting me, it doesn't bother me as much. And you never know who else is texting somebody. But, like, the other day, I had literally six different text messages. Like, six different people and or groups going off at the same time. I was like, is the world ending right now? It was like. And I was like, son of a. And I open it, and one person was sending me, like, one sentence. One sentence, one sentence, one sentence. And I was like, that could have all been.

[Donald]

It could have been one alert.

[Emily]

Yes.

[Donald]

I don't have this kind of bandwidth.

[Emily]

You, like, do you understand the anxiety you just triggered in me? I was like, holy. Like, like, what is going on?

[Donald]

Like, this is not a. It's a Wonderful Life or whatever. The angels are getting there.

[Emily]

So. But there's also, on the flip side of that, don't text me seven paragraphs, that becomes a voice message or a phone call.

[Donald]

Yes.

[Emily]

So if it's four sentences or less, that's all one text. Say it all in one thing.

[Donald]

I agree.

[Emily]

Okay. If it's. I was gonna say maybe like five or six sentences. Five. Maybe you want to break that up into two. But if you start to get over, like five sentences, either send me a voice memo or call me.

[Donald]

I 100.

[Emily]

Like, I don't need to try to.

[Donald]

Read a paragraph and also responding to it. I'm like, okay, I feel like I need to break this down and, like, highlight the different parts and tell you what part I'm responding to. It's too much. I. If someone's talking to me and in real time, they're like, let's go to dinner. We could go here. Sends the text and then thinks of another place or maybe this spot that's fine. And then sees something else. And that makes sense.

[Emily]

Yes.

[Donald]

But if you have all those options in your mind, if you're like, I was thinking we could either go to send it all in one text. But if you're like, I'm not sure what you're doing. I was thinking that maybe we could meet up at this time. But also this might be happening. So Sunday could be an option. If you have space of. I'm like, this is a phone call.

[Emily]

That's a phone call. Or at least a voice memo.

[Donald]

He's the voice memo.

[Emily]

But you have to know that the voice memo could take a little while to get to. Because if I'm doing something where I can't just play a voice memo out loud, you're gonna have to wait for me to listen to it.

[Donald]

But the great thing is you can play voice memos back faster.

[Emily]

I know, but if you're sending a voice memo longer than two minutes is too long, That's a phone call.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

You have to understand the etiquette of when to use these things, because I. If you're gonna leave me again. If it's a five minute voice memo, now I have to try to remember everything you said. I have to try to respond to it, which means I probably now have to send a five minute voice memo back. Let's just get on the phone.

[Donald]

Yeah. I literally say, call me.

[Emily]

Yeah, well.

[Donald]

Or I'll try to call. And if it goes to voicemail, I'm like, you're telling me you have the time to sit down, work your thumbs to death, Sending me a no of what you think. And you can't quickly Answer the phone and talk to me about what?

[Emily]

Then the person goes, I'm in a work meeting. And you're like, well, get to work. Yeah, sure. I'm paying attention.

[Donald]

Right. Would never. Would have thought it was just you and your associate sending dick pics to each other across. Across the conference.

[Emily]

We haven't done that in years. Okay. That was like, pre pandemic, but good old days. Yeah. Right. Sometimes you got to break up with an. I'm getting fire for sure.

[Donald]

But Yeah, I agree 100%. Like, if you. If it's that long, just pick up the phone and. Or if I send a voice so you can let me know. You might notice this when it has to do, like, in a group text. That has to do with our podcast.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Donald]

I'll say I'm gonna send a voice memo explaining this issue.

[Emily]

Yes.

[Donald]

Because also, if a voice memo just pops up, it really is like, if I just feel like you're shooting the shit. I'm not going to prioritize it if I have a lot on my plate.

[Emily]

Right.

[Donald]

Because. Because I don't know if you know, but she gets overwhelmed easy. I'm like, I need girl. I need some space.

[Emily]

You're preaching to the why.

[Donald]

Somebody could be like, can I ask you a question? And no, please don't.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Donald]

Not even listening. Who are you? But no. So I think it's important, too. Like, if something is pressing, I maybe send a text.

[Emily]

Yes.

[Donald]

I just need to get this covered. I'm going to send a voicemail to give you the rundown.

[Emily]

Yeah. Or a call especially, though, because, like, in our group chat for, like, with the podcast, because producer or editor. I mean, like, we don't have a producer. Clearly. Don't spit that out, obviously. But there's three of us, so sometimes getting everybody on a call is harder to do. So it's easier to be like, I'm gonna send a voice memo. That way all parties can hear it and all parties can respond, and we don't all have to try to coordinate a zoom call or something.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Like, so I think in a group like that, it makes more sense to say, like, I'm gonna send this. Explain it. Everybody weigh in.

[Donald]

Right.

[Emily]

Or like, again, if you're trying to plan a big event, like party, birthday party, I'm gonna send it. Everybody weigh in.

[Donald]

Yes.

[Emily]

Kind of thing. But you know, it's going to take some time.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

So, yeah.

[Donald]

So how do you feel about abbreviations and texting?

[Emily]

Okay. There are certain ones. I know. And there's certain ones that I'm like. I will say this. I feel like my mind's good at puzzles, but sometimes I'm like, what is that? Sometimes I'm taking it to the chat GPT because I'm like, I don't know if I know what this means, and I don't want to sound stupid.

[Donald]

I know. I was actually impressed. I asked Chat GPT today because I knew we were going to touch on texting things about, oh, no, he's gonna put me to the test about, like, those abbreviations. And it gave us a few different. Now some of these, obviously, you're gonna know, like, oh. But you know what's so funny, too? This is a good thing about emojis, because sometimes things get lost. And I was talking to my aunt, and she was texting someone, and she said, oh, my gosh. She said, three is better than one you. And I said, what? And she said, look. And it was the I, the greater than side B, and the three you, you. And she didn't know that. It was like, is that saying I heart you or I love you, I love you casually, you know? And I was like, she's not saying three is better than one. It's so funny, though.

[Emily]

That is funny. But also, just use a heart emoji. We have them.

[Donald]

That's it. That's what I'm saying.

[Emily]

Don't be confusing, especially your aunt. And do emojis like, 70. Right?

[Donald]

Right.

[Emily]

Come on, help the lady out.

[Donald]

Be respectful. And she's so cutting edge. And once I told, she's like, oh, we laughed at it.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Donald]

So what do you guys think? I mean, what do you think about you? I forgot what I was gonna ask.

[Emily]

Well, you were gonna ask me different abbreviations.

[Donald]

I was gonna ask this. Are emojis the same? Like, if I send them? You might not know this because you're a normal person with an iPhone. If someone with an iPhone sends an emoji to an Android user, and no offense, I know we have them, but, you guys, there's hope for you. I'm just kidding.

[Emily]

We know your camera's better than ours, but, God, you're the reason that the chat is green. The group.

[Donald]

Yeah, the group chat.

[Emily]

But I wonder.

[Donald]

I've always wondered.

[Emily]

I think it is because I text back and forth with my friend Bonnie and she has an Android.

[Donald]

Oh, my God. Bonnie. Bonnie.

[Emily]

I love her. I love her. She's too funny. But come on, girl. But. Because I always have to. Like when I send her photos or videos because she helps me with my LTK account. She's always like, can you email this to me? I'm like, girl, I'm gonna send you a damn iPhone.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Just for our communication. But I think emojis go through the same way.

[Donald]

Okay.

[Emily]

I think I'm 99. Sure.

[Donald]

Because at one point. But this friend, I mean, I got friends all different kind of places making all different kind of decisions, and I have a friend who it would be like, instead of showing the emoji, say, sent a heart image or something, I'm like, well, that really loses its touch. But I think it's been updated since then.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Donald]

Okay, so we have some really easy ones. I think I should just quick fire down this list and you should say what they are.

[Emily]

Okay. Start me off easy.

[Donald]

It's easy. Lol laughing out loud brb.

[Emily]

Be right back.

[Donald]

Omg.

[Emily]

Oh my God.

[Donald]

Idk.

[Emily]

I don't know.

[Donald]

Ttyl.

[Emily]

Talk to you later. Imo, in my opinion.

[Donald]

And it also has imho, in my.

[Emily]

Honest opinion, which basically means go yourself.

[Donald]

Exactly. In my honest opinion, you're stupid. You're an idiot. FYI, TBH and mvm.

[Emily]

So I got all those. If you didn't follow along on that conversation, you gotta go look some things up.

[Donald]

That's right. Okay, the next one. Idgaf.

[Emily]

Oh, I don't give a.

[Donald]

Obviously these are all pretty like idc.

[Emily]

I don't care.

[Donald]

Smh.

[Emily]

Shaking my head.

[Donald]

Iykyk Wait.

[Emily]

Iyk oh, if you know, you know.

[Donald]

Yeah, that one, I don't know when it became popular because it's one I wouldn't have used. I think maybe on social.

[Emily]

It became popular on Social. Like, it was like a hashtag if you know, you know, kind of thing. Like.

[Donald]

Okay, and this one I didn't know was a thing, but I think I would get it fr.

[Emily]

For real?

[Donald]

Yes, frfr.

[Emily]

For real. For real. Yeah.

[Donald]

Oh, this one I didn't know I had to look. So let me see if you get it. I C Y M I in case you missed it. Oh, yeah. I did not know. I didn't know that one. Wow. You should be testing me. I am. Oh, this one is stupid. It's the chat GPT. I'm see, AI isn't always careful.

[Emily]

Don't call your AI stupid. It's gonna. It's gonna make you feel real dumb.

[Donald]

It's imo. Af and it says it's in my opinion, as extra spicy. I'm like, in my opinion, I would.

[Emily]

Have gotten that just because the IMO is in my opinion and AF is. Yeah, but that doesn't but there's no space. It makes sense.

[Donald]

I know. That's why I said the same thing.

[Emily]

Okay, learn how to use your abbreviations, people.

[Donald]

I'm looking for some harder ones now. Okay, obviously you know goat, but some listeners might not.

[Emily]

It's greatest of all time.

[Donald]

Bffr.

[Emily]

Best friend. Bffr, Best friend. For real.

[Donald]

That's what I would have thought, but apparently it's be for real.

[Emily]

Oh, that makes sense.

[Donald]

I wouldn't have got that, but that does make sense.

[Emily]

But that's because we're used to BFF being your best friend forever. That just shows our age. But be so for real or be so for real is, like, such a trending saying now.

[Donald]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Damn.

[Donald]

So these ones are interesting because, like.

[Emily]

Hbu, how about you?

[Donald]

Yeah. Which all the others are.

[Emily]

First of all, that's not how you spell.

[Donald]

Exactly. So why are you putting the U where the Y should be? Obviously.

[Emily]

Yeah. And by the way, it's how about you? So it should be H A Y. How about you? Not hbu. How about you? Come on. We're abbreviating the abbreviation.

[Donald]

That's what I mean.

[Emily]

You gotta go layers deep.

[Donald]

Kids these days.

[Emily]

But by the way, talk about going layers deep, we gotta bring Dom in for an episode about the lingo that these kids use.

[Donald]

You want us to look real, Dom?

[Emily]

First of all, I don't know if we look dumb. Their language is so dumb. I'm like, first of all, there's gonna be a whole new dictionary. I mean, obviously there's already, like, the urban diction, but, like, huh. The way Dom was, like, so impressed with me, he said something. Oh, we were doing something at the parade the other day and, like, Buddy yanked him and he almost fell over. And I was like, lost all your aura? And he goes. He was, like, embarrassed that I said it. And he's like, I can't believe you just said that.

[Donald]

Is that what people say?

[Emily]

Yeah. Or have you heard of aura farming?

[Donald]

So are we talking aura, like, the colors, energy around you, or like, yeah.

[Emily]

Like, I stole your aura.

[Donald]

But someone said something about aura the other day, and I was like, are they just being creative?

[Emily]

No, this is like a whole new thing that kids use. So, like, if somebody makes you look stupid, you got aura farmed.

[Donald]

Oh, my God.

[Emily]

I know. Or like, if you do something stupid, you lost your aura. Or if you do something really cool, you're like, I have all the aura. Oh, my God. I, I. Aura for life.

[Donald]

Oh, my God. I need. I'm gonna look up videos to make sure I Say it correctly, because I am the who will be out here.

[Emily]

Trying to be cool saying it wrong.

[Donald]

Yes.

[Emily]

And then what else? Else? He did something else. And I. I used another one of their lingo terms, and he was like, that's twice. He's like, I don't know about you using our terms properly. And I was like, well, you want me to use them wrong?

[Donald]

Yeah, that's the other option. Yeah, man, I know.

[Emily]

We gotta bring these kids out here. Like, we gotta bring them out here. Because the things that they say, I'm like, oh, my God, you know? Oh, that slaps.

[Donald]

Oh, they say slaps?

[Emily]

Yeah, that means it's good.

[Donald]

Yeah, I say slaps.

[Emily]

Okay.

[Donald]

But I was worried. I was, like, dated saying it.

[Emily]

I actually do think it's a little past now. That's the other thing. They use it and then it's done.

[Donald]

That's the problem.

[Emily]

Have you heard of six, seven?

[Donald]

Yeah. I don't get that.

[Emily]

It doesn't have a meaning.

[Donald]

People just.

[Emily]

They was, like, referencing a basketball player and his height. And then everybody started doing it, and they do it with this. That's one of the ones I did. Dom did something. I was like, six, seven. And he's like, no, don't. I was like, did I do it wrong? And he's like, no, you did it right. And I was like, so shut up.

[Donald]

Yeah. I accidentally said six or seven the other day on a story, and I got so many messages from being like, ah, six, seven. I was like, oh, my God, what is the world? This is such a weird time to be alive. So a couple other of these. NGL what is it? NGL not great.

[Emily]

Not gonna lie.

[Donald]

Yes, okay. Not gonna lie. I haven't seen this. S.T.G.

[Emily]

S. T. G. I swear to God. Oh, duh.

[Donald]

Sus. Which just means suspicious.

[Emily]

That's suspicious.

[Donald]

Bet. Which means. Okay, agreed. Child. That's like, from our day.

[Emily]

That is like, they'll use it 9 million ways, though. Like, yes, it means agree. But, like. Because they'll be like, bet. But then they'll also be like. Like, they'll. Dom will just say it for anything. He'll be like, oh, bet. I'm like, what? What? Like, he uses it as. Let's go. I'm like, okay.

[Donald]

I mean, honestly, looking at this, you could just not type words ever again. Good morning, G.M. good night, G.N. yeah, TTYS talk to you soon. I'm gonna start. I'm gonna do the most. Every time I message you now, I'm just gonna give an abbreviation of the words. I want to use.

[Emily]

I just want to see if I can get any more of these. I should. We should save it. It. Oh, okay. Let me see if you know what any of these means. No, Cap.

[Donald]

Not. I. Like, I'm telling the truth. Like, not. I'm not telling a lie. I don't know means I don't know.

[Emily]

Well, cap means you're lying. So if somebody's like, cap, that means that's a lie. But if they say, no, cap, that's not a lie.

[Donald]

Oh, they'll say, cap. Yeah, like that.

[Emily]

Okay, so, like, if you say something and I think you're lying, I'm like, cap.

[Donald]

Okay.

[Emily]

Rizzo.

[Donald]

Something about it makes me think it's jazzy. Put some riz on it.

[Emily]

He just went back to the forties, y'. All.

[Donald]

I thought it was like, he said.

[Emily]

Put a little open there, give it some ribs.

[Donald]

What is it?

[Emily]

Riz is like. You have riz because you have charisma. Okay, so you're not wrong, but it's from charisma. You have riz.

[Donald]

Okay.

[Emily]

Okay. Busin.

[Donald]

Huh? That means busin.

[Emily]

That's busin.

[Donald]

Like, good. Cool.

[Emily]

It's good. Drip.

[Donald]

The same. Like, your clothes.

[Emily]

Style.

[Donald]

Style.

[Emily]

Yeah, style. Clothing, accessories. It's good. Like, oh, that's good. Drip. Dulu.

[Donald]

You're delusional.

[Emily]

Thank you.

[Donald]

Love that one.

[Emily]

Okay. Skibidi.

[Donald]

Dippity.

[Emily]

Do you.

[Donald]

Skippity? What is skippity?

[Emily]

It could mean anything. Like, it could be good, it could be bad. It's just. Could.

[Donald]

This is what they say.

[Emily]

Yeah. They're like, skibidi. That's skibidi. And you're like. Literally, for months, I was like, what does it mean? And he would just laugh. And I'm like. Because it doesn't mean anything. You guys just throw out these. These syllables, basically. But they all know what they're implying in the context of what they're saying.

[Donald]

Yeah. You know, Nels has a word in Spanish that he uses, and I don't know if all Spanish speaking countries use it or if it's Puerto Rican, but it's Dolly. Dolly Dali.

[Emily]

Let's go.

[Donald]

Yeah, right? And they'll be like, he'll ask. And Cuba and Puerto Rico are closed. They probably. They could be influenced.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Donald]

I don't know. I don't know. No, I'm definitely stepping into territory where I'm not educated. But, like, if someone says something like, oh, yeah, I'll call you later. Like, all right. Yeah, Dolly. Like, it's like. It's sort of just so I'm gonna start saying skibidi. Skibidi. I'm glad I'm not working in the restaurant, but I kind of wish I was. Can we get a martini? Skibidi. I would definitely.

[Emily]

That would not be the appropriate way to use that.

[Donald]

Skippity.

[Emily]

They would look at you like you're crazy. We talked about aura because you can also have aura points. It's like getting aura points.

[Donald]

Okay.

[Emily]

We talked about six, seven. Get Cindy.

[Donald]

Cindy.

[Emily]

Get Cindy.

[Donald]

What is it, Sandy? Like S, E, N, D, Y, Y. Does it mean, like, get to?

[Emily]

It means go.

[Donald]

People say send it.

[Emily]

Yeah. So it means if you say, like, oh, get Cindy, go all in.

[Donald]

Okay. I'm sorry. This is not mid. I draw the line. Mid.

[Emily]

Yeah. If something's mid, like.

[Donald]

Okay, yeah. Oh, yeah, I like that one.

[Emily]

Yeah, that's mid. Okay, well, that's all that chat GPG's got for me because I asked for more and it.

[Donald]

Well, I'm sure within a week these children these days are going to find some other stuff. Honestly. Talk about content.

[Emily]

My ball. What is it my ball. No, no, that's not what it means.

[Donald]

What does it mean?

[Emily]

A term of endearment used by some teens to refer to a romantic partner. Similar to my babe ball. Yeah, but with a newer twist. They're doing the most. Y' all maybe settle down and just use the English language.

[Donald]

Maybe I need to be kinder to myself. But if I had a significant other calling up their ball. I'm sorry, but my mind goes around. My mind goes to. Rotund. My mind goes to. You are around as you are tall. My mind goes to. My mind goes to. We're breaking up. So. No, no, not your ball.

[Emily]

My boo. My bag. But not your ball.

[Donald]

Not your ball. That's bouncy, and that's not what I want to be.

[Emily]

Okay, we really need to keep Kleenex over here because I'm literally.

[Donald]

My ball.

[Emily]

You said my brain goes. You're rounded. Your heart.

[Donald]

All of a sudden, it's like I am the rolling ball in Indiana Jones coming through. Like it literally is not. There's not.

[Emily]

No. There's no turn. There's no. Any time I want to be referred.

[Donald]

To as your ball, my neck disappears. Not. We're done. That's not it.

[Emily]

We all know that shortens from ball and chain.

[Donald]

Oh, that's right.

[Emily]

Like you are saying the meanest. Missed.

[Donald]

Yeah, for sure.

[Emily]

Done. Don't date young kids.

[Donald]

That's right.

[Emily]

This is why I date older. I'm like, can't mess it up.

[Donald]

There that's right.

[Emily]

Oh, my God, I'm literally crying. So on that note.

[Donald]

On that note, we hope you feel more educated, but you might feel a little.

[Emily]

A little dumber.

[Donald]

A little dumber, honestly.

[Emily]

Sorry.

[Donald]

Don't shoot the messenger. That's right. Just never send us a period. That's the point. If you text us us anything other.

[Emily]

Than periods, you know, every email we're getting is going to be like, period.

[Donald]

For real. We just have meltdowns over it.

[Emily]

We're like, our podcast is going off the air. They all hate us. Anywho, if you do want to email us everything's perfect podcast gmail.com and you can find us on social.

[Donald]

Everything's Perfect official on Instagram, and we love to see you guys there. We'd love to hear what you think. Definitely. Like, subscribe, comment, and share the podcast with a friend. We love everybody. Except for the ones.

[Emily]

My ball.

[Donald]

Yeah. Also, most people know it sounds dirty. Yeah. All I think about is what's his name? Wait, an Armstrong, for sure. But he had. Never mind. I'm sorry. We were ending the podcast and we should have ended it while we were there. We'll see you guys next time.