
Unwrapping the Art of Gift Giving: Returns, Regifting & Holiday Pressure In this festive and unfiltered episode, Donald and Autumn unwrap the highs and lows of gift giving — from the joy of thoughtful surprises to the awkward reality of returns...
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Autumn
I just had to elevate myself where I probably look like I have no legs.
B
Oh, my God. Is that a French tuck? What are you, a millennial?
Autumn
I'm a millennial, so I am gonna tuck and cuff and roll.
B
The damn way I play sound like a drag queen. I'm gonna tuck, cuff, and roll. What's up, you guys? Welcome to another fabulous episode of Everything Except.
Autumn
Our audio keeps perfect, except for we.
B
Need a staff of people that just are not here right now.
Autumn
Right now. We don't have this ever. I'm trying to take this label off so people don't know what my product is called.
B
Is it okay? My. This is my. This says that.
Autumn
Yeah, you're good. I got enough of it off. It just looks janky, but that's fine. And also, there's trash behind my chair now.
B
Whatever.
Autumn
Classy. Keep it classy. Autumn.
B
So, so. So. Well, when we're recording this. So some time will go by, by the time the people are listening, but you have entered into another year of the fabulous life you're living. How do you feel?
Autumn
I am officially 45. I feel the same as what I felt when I was 44.
B
Good.
Autumn
Dominic put on the birthday card that he wrote to me. Something about. He wrote me this very sweet card, but then he said, you're something about being close to 50.
B
I was like, that's rude.
Autumn
Don't be a dick. Yeah, don't write a really sweet card and then say, just five more years till 50.
B
I was like, that ain't right. Yeah, that ain't cool. Exactly. You bitch. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I only talk about one child. That way we know who it is. I'm not gonna say it on here.
Autumn
Oh, someone's on one way.
B
I love it.
Autumn
I'm here for it. So, yeah, 45. We went out last night, y'. All. Let me just lay it out for you. This is true bestie form right now. Donald said, what do you want to do for your birthday? I said, should we go to Vegas and see Pitbull? And then we didn't end up doing that, and I'm good. And then we were talking about it two weeks ago, and I was like, I want to do, like, something all day. Like, let's just make a thing of it, you know, I don't want to work. And I was like, chat GPT, like, plan a day Los Angeles, but, like, elevate it. Like, think Kardashians. Yes, I said that. I wasn't really expecting, like, this, like, Kardashian party. But I wanted, like, a. A vibe of hi, Ed. And so it was, like, telling us places to go and shop and spa and lunch at Beverly Hills Hotel. And de's like, yeah, we're going to do lunch at Beverly Hills Hotel. And then this. And then we did talk about an escape room. And we're like, that's fun. And dinner. So Donald says, yesterday, on my birthday. He's like, okay, so it's escape room. And he's like, it looks scary as fuck. And I was like, wait, what? Because the only thing I think of when I think of escape room is, like, the Schitt's Creek episode where they're trying to escape this Alice in Wonderland. Like, they have to answer all these clues. And then he sent me the link, and I didn't open the link because I was doing something. And then when I got to his apartment before we went out, he showed me it, and I was like, what? In case you all missed it, I don't like to be scared at all. I don't watch scary movies. When we were having the ghost issues up in this podcast, I was like, I'm gonna burn it to the ground.
B
I knew that I was. I was nervous about that, but I was like, you know, it's a fun adventure. We'll be there together. And I wanted to pick the one that I thought would be the least scary.
Autumn
He picked the most scary room that had the hardest clues. That's what they said when they got there. They said, have you ever done it? And we said, no. And they said, well, you picked the hard, hardest, scariest one. The attic. Yeah, the attic, y'. All. We were in an attic. It was pitch black. They start you in, like, pitch black. They take your cell phones, they take your everything. They're like. They don't want you have anything. You can't turn a light on. And it's creepy as. And this girl that was in the lobby that works there, she kept scaring me. And it was like she was in plain sight. But they were like, oh, you could take a picture right here. So I, like, sit down and take this picture, and she pops her head through these, like, the side of these red curtains, and she's like, like, horror scream.
B
I was like, it really did get me. Like, every time I said, you.
Autumn
You're really asking to be punched, just so you know. No, we had the best time, honestly.
B
Just so you know. The options were asylum, hide and seek. But it's like. It said it was with contact, so with contact. As I was like, we're not doing that because there's gonna be people, like, grabbing us and stuff.
Autumn
No, I would for sure hurt somebody.
B
Choking us. I'm like, I'm gonna get an erection in this. I'm just kidding. Not my kink. In an escape room. I'm totally kidding.
Autumn
You didn't tell me we were doing.
B
The not suitable for work episode now and then. It was Daycare, Haunted Fair, Cursed Crypt, Resurrection, and Zombie. So I was like, everybody's got an attic. Maybe that's like the safest one. But it was scary.
Autumn
It was scary. But once we got into it, I was like, so hell bent on solving the clues.
B
It was re. I love those things. And it was fun. It's really fun. If you've never done an escape room, you should find one. Or like, if you don't have one in your town, next time you're someplace that has one, you should do it. Especially with a group of friends. I think it's fun.
Autumn
You. You brought up something, though. Like you said that there's one where there's contact. So can I tell you this is my psycho brain.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Welcome to the inner workings. I know this isn't where we're going with the episode, but we live in such a effed up world. Like, I won't go to a haunted house. I don't let Dom go to haunted houses because I'm like, listen, y', all, people are crazy. So if somebody's running around with a fake knife and fake blood, some crazy person, it's only a matter of time until they step in there and do some crazy.
B
Right?
Autumn
And it scares me. Anytime I think about that, you're like, you want to put me in an attic? You want to take my phone and the lights are all going to be off and it's going to be scary. Am I coming out all right?
B
It is like, you think, like, there. I forget what movie it was. Maybe it was the last Michael Myers or something. But one of those horror movies, it took place in a haunted place like that. And I was like, duh. If I wanted to be some crazy murderer, that's where I do it too.
Autumn
Yeah, exactly. So I hope crazy murderers are listening to our podcast, getting ideas. But yeah, so it's always in the back of my mind, like any of those type of. So when you say contact, I'm like, oh, don't.
B
You don't touch me.
Autumn
Because, yeah, somebody's coming out battered and bruised, and it ain't gonna be me.
C
Yeah.
B
I was just like, what do you get the person who has everything? And the answer was experience. And so we had mixed experience.
Autumn
And I felt like we did do very good with those clues because some of them were really hard.
C
Yeah. Yeah.
Autumn
They were, like, very puzzle. Like, the first one was this music thing.
B
I mean, there's no way an average, normal person can get that without doing clues because they give you clues, which is nice because sometimes you're on the right track. But it's like. Also, it's so dark in there.
Autumn
In the beginning, you don't have all your senses.
B
No, you don't.
Autumn
Literally, you took my eyesight.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
And I'm trying to figure out. Anyways, it was fun. We had a good time.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
I didn't like the girl jumping out and scaring me. I wasn't okay with that. But other than that, we had fun. We had a great dinner. It was good. I'm excited for year 45.
B
Good.
Autumn
Yeah.
B
I'm here for it, too.
Autumn
I'm excited to see what it brings. It's really weird to think, like, where I was at last year. We were, like, on set. We had just started filming Belvital.
B
Wow.
Autumn
I know.
B
It's crazy when you think it has been. It is wild. It has been a year.
Autumn
It has.
B
Interesting.
Autumn
Yeah. And then, like, two weeks after that, everything flipped with body. So it's like. Yeah. It was right after my 44th birthday that I was like, oh, my God. This was not what I was anticipating, how this new birth year would start.
C
Yeah.
B
Can we rewind?
Autumn
Like, I'm gonna need. No.
B
A minute.
Autumn
Yeah. But, you know, everything's been good, and here we are. But it does. Okay. It does bring up a question. Like, we're coming up on the holidays, too, so birthdays, like, sort of opened the door. You and I were talking about this, but it also comes up with. So, like, gift giving.
B
Yeah.
Autumn
Gift giving, gift receiving, gift returning.
B
Do you think that you're a good gift giver?
Autumn
I am.
B
Would you say it's one of your. Because, you know, there's the love languages.
Autumn
Yeah.
B
Is that one of yours?
Autumn
It is. I love to give gifts and I love to give. Like, but I need time, like, because I do want it to be thoughtful and like. And I'm like, I. It doesn't always. It's not always a material thing. Sometimes it's an experience. Like, if I know somebody's really going to love to go do a thing, like, I want to plan that whole. Whole thing. Like, one of the things I did for my boyfriend was, like, just A trip to Napa because he loves wine. This is when we were first dating. And like, just having the weekend and the food and like the different tastings and stuff. Like, I love to do that and I love to get, like, I love to surprise people. So not like, especially if it's an experience.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Like, I mean, I get excited to give them the gift too, if it's. But yeah, I do think I'm good at it and I like to do it.
B
I fucking hate it.
Autumn
Really.
B
I'm not good at it. And it's always the. Because I have this thing in my mind about it needs to be the perfect gift. It needs to be. And I overthink it and then it's like, you just find a throwaway gift to give something. I think my love language is way more. Because I do love quality time. And so, like, how we celebrated your birthday yesterday, the things we did was all spending quality time together. Right. Right. And so, or, and sometimes, like, I, I think it's acts of service. Like, you know, the lines are very thin between getting someone a gift or doing something for someone and. Right. But as far as, like, packaging, like giving, handing someone a gift, it's really not my strong suit. I overthink it and I never feel awesome about it. I think if I won the lottery, was a billionaire, I would. Because I just give people some expensive ass.
Autumn
You're like, I know.
B
Here's a Louis Vuitton lugg.
Autumn
Yeah.
C
Yeah.
B
But, yeah, it's not my thing. And so I, I am excited to talk about this because I know I can't be the only one.
Autumn
No, I'm sure. And I will say it depends on the person too. There are some people that are like, super easy. They, you know, they just inspire ideas.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
And there are other people, like my father, where I just am like, and this is a person who could use anything.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
But I also feel like just nothing is the right gift for him.
B
Right. It's so like, I like giving. I will say when I see if I'm someplace and I see something, I'm like, oh, my God, this person would love it. I love to get it for them. But I think that's more of the acts of service side of me than it is the gift giving. Because, like, gift givers love Christmas. For example, Christmas was my least favorite holiday because of the gifts.
Autumn
Interesting. Well, okay, so two things. I, I, I think it's a blurred line between acts of service and a gift, because it is still a gift, but. And I actually think there's something so special about a gift just because you saw something that somebody would love.
C
Yes.
Autumn
Like, it's almost even more meaningful than, hey, it's your birthday. I had to quote, unquote, get you something.
B
Right.
Autumn
Because I know you don't get somebody. Like, you don't have to get somebody something. But like, sometimes you're like, oh, it's your birthday, I gotta come up with something.
B
Exactly.
Autumn
Or it's Christmas, I gotta come up with something. So yeah, I think that a gift just because is pretty awesome. And I do think yes, like Christmas, especially like, can, because not. Okay, not only is it Christmas, it's not even one gift usually it's usually it's like multiple gifts for each person and there's a lot. So like, you just get like gift fatigue of trying to figure out what to get people.
B
Totally.
Autumn
Hey. Okay, so let me ask you this. We're gonna bounce all over the place with gifts right now. Do you start shopping early for Christmas?
B
No.
Autumn
Are you, are you a last minute shopper?
B
Pretty much. Well, it depends on what you call last minute. But yeah, no matter what you call.
Autumn
It, I'm that like two weeks or less before Christmas.
B
I pretty much. Well, here's the thing. Usually I don't buy all my friends a bunch of Christmas gifts most of the time. But some close friends I might. And that's only if they're hosting a Christmas party.
Autumn
What about like family and nieces and nephews?
B
I was going to say nieces and nephews. I do not do early, but nieces and nephews are easy. It's like you just pick whatever age group choices.
C
Yeah.
B
And my, my adults in my family, the last couple years we've been exchanging names.
Autumn
Uhhuh.
B
And which I like so much more because then you can give a really thoughtful gift to one person instead of giving like a sweater or a bunch.
Autumn
Of like small, oh, $10 limit. So everybody gets something. But you can't really put a lot of ex. You couldn't come up with something great for 10. But I'm just saying you could.
B
But it does just feel like, you know, we, we live in such a, a society where we have so much already and it's like to just have a bunch of shit because really if there's something I want and it's between 20 and 50 bucks, I already have it.
Autumn
Right.
B
You know what I mean? Like I bought it already. There's no way, like with instant gratification situation, Amazon and like prime, please. I already bought that. So. But it is fun for like, exchanging a gift, maybe if you can spend a little bit more or you just put more thought into that one person. So. So that's what we do.
Autumn
I'm an early Christmas shopper, but here's what happens, like, right now, like, okay, it's September 24th. So Dom goes into, like, lockdown. Like, he'll. He'll ask for stuff. And I'm like, no, man, we're. We're like two and a half months out from Christmas. There are no presents right now. And dom's birthday is January 22nd, so it's like Christmas. And then four weeks later, I have his birthday. And so I'm like, don't ask for things. Put it on a list and let me know. Like, that's where we're at now.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
But I will start keeping my eye out, like, come October. That's when I sort of start keeping my out, like, my. Like. And so if I see something for somebody, I get it, and then it's just like, okay, and sort of like, that's taken care of so that I do have more time and I don't get burnout fatigue. But what usually ends up happening is I'll spend a few weeks doing that, and I'll get a bunch of. Like, I'll get a bunch of people taken care of. And then I feel like I'm done. And then all of a sudden, two weeks before Christmas, I'm like, oh, I'm so. I forgot. Oh, I forgot. It's not quite as bad now, especially because work is a little bit different and we're not in the office every day. But I used to buy for a lot of my co workers because I had. You know, when I'm putting out two programs a year and all this, and I had teams and stuff, like, I really wanted to make sure I took care of people. So it's not laid out like that as much. So it's not quite as many people I have to buy for anymore.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
And my nephews are older now, like, 17, 20. Dom 16. We all know they want money.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Makes it a little bit easier than it did when I had to, like, search for the gift. But I am an early shopper for it.
B
What is. Okay, so receiving gifts. What is your favorite childhood Christmas present that you got? Can you think of one? Oh, boy, that really stands out.
Autumn
Well, when Cabbage Patch dolls were, like, all the rage, me, my brother and sister all wanted one, and my mom did a get us one. We each got one. And I did love my Cabbage Patch doll like, that One stands out because I remember, like, that was a big deal. People were fighting in the stores for those things. And the fact that my mom was able to get three. There was a time she actually was better mom. She is now. Sure. Didn't get a birthday call.
B
Or a Cabbage Patch doll.
Autumn
Nope. Yeah, I feel like the Cabbage Patch doll stands out. And there was one Christmas. I remember there was this, like, purse I saw, like. I don't know if we were at JCPenney's or something. It was gray, and it had little pink hearts on it. And I remember opening it up on Christmas. I probably was, like, five. And I remember, like, putting it on my shoulder, and I was like, I'm a mom because I have a purse. But I was so excited that I got that purse. And it had, like, my little fake lipstick in it and, like, a little hairbrush and stuff like that.
B
It's funny.
Autumn
What about you? Those are two that I remember. What about you?
B
Well, my parents always said I was really hard to buy for. Like. Cause I remember I was like, I want a computer. And so they got me. I was a child, and I don't even think my family had a computer yet. And they got me, like, one of the. I think it was a Fisher Price.
Autumn
Yeah.
B
Like, you press it. It had some games on it. And I opened it, and I was like, this isn't a computer. I said, toy. I want a proper computer, you know.
Autumn
But. Cheap ass.
B
Yeah, but one that stands out. That I loved. And I don't remember how old I was, but I was small enough that they took us to Santa and I told Santa what I wanted. But I feel like I also kind of knew my. It was my parents. Like, I don't.
Autumn
Don't let your kids listen to this episode.
C
Yeah.
B
And.
Autumn
Too late.
B
And. Well, you know, because parents and parents give you presents, and Santa gives presents. So anyways, I asked Santa, even though I think it was the imposter, like, on Elf, it wasn't the real Santa. I'm just kidding.
C
He.
B
I. I was like, I want Barbies. Which is. I'm so embarrassed to ask because little boys weren't supposed to play with Barbies. But I really wanted some. I was shocked that Christmas to open up. I got an Aladdin and Jasmine Barbie, and I actually fucking loved it. And I was just so happy. And I remember being like, oh, my God, I can't believe that I got these. I got this. I don't have to go to my friends to play with theirs, because I actually thought Barbies were Really cool. When I was little.
Autumn
I love you, Barbie.
B
Yeah. And then the other one that stands out, I was 15, so I was a little bit older. And they got me an entertainment center, like, for my bedroom.
Autumn
Oh.
B
So like the. Where I'd put a tv, like, glass doors. You couldn't tell me nothing. I was like, all right, well, this is my house now.
Autumn
Get out.
B
I was up there. Yeah. It was my apartment. It wasn't my bedroom. I was like feeling myself. So those are the two that stand out. And I really loved those.
Autumn
That's funny. Those are good ones.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
You know what's really funny?
B
What?
Autumn
Someone said today that we should be Aladdin and Jasmine for one of our Halloween costumes. Right?
B
Yes.
Autumn
So there you go. What?
B
It's self deprecating humor, but I love it.
Autumn
I'm here for it.
B
I'm gonna look like Aladdin after he stole a few extra loaves of bread. Bitch. With that open. Have to. I'm gonna be the prince Aladdin to have the full cover with the shoulder pads because she ain't open. Vest ready. That's what. That's a body you get from running from the guards. Okay. I ain't had to run from a garden a minute.
Autumn
That's the body you get when you got to steal your food. You don't get that readily available.
B
Exactly. The abundant. I'm living that abundant life.
Autumn
I wouldn't say I'm Princess Jasmine Toit right now, but we'll dial.
B
Here we are.
Autumn
Here we are. We'll be like the Aladdin and Jasmine that walk Hollywood bullet.
B
Yeah, exactly. Kids are like, I don't want to take my picture with them.
Autumn
They're like, that's not them.
B
Who are these imposters?
Autumn
Okay, question. Another question, though, about gifty giving.
B
Huh?
Autumn
I have a pet peeve.
B
Oh.
Autumn
When people ask, what do you want? I'm like, that's tacky. Like, that would be. It's tacky to respond in. But by the way, I'm also guilty of asking people what they want. So just know. I know that. But like, if somebody says to you, what do you want? Are you. Are you supposed to actually tell them what you want? Are you supposed to be like the polite. Like, you don't have to get me anything. I'm good. Like, if somebody asks you, it's like, well, it's weird because then you're like, you. You're automatically aware of, like, what something might cost or should I ask for that? Or like, so. Yeah, I know, but I know when people ask, they're really trying to get an idea because they want to get you something that you're really gonna love.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
But it's like, well, do you just give a vague. Like, I'd love some clothes or some cute earrings would be nice. And you're not obviously suggesting diamonds, but you're like, maybe you want some? Like, yeah. Or should you just do the polite. No, you don't have to give me anything. Like, what are your thoughts on that?
B
I. It's so funny, this. I just have a story that came to my mind because of this, because I wanted. And I still want. I haven't got one yet. And it's something. I'm like, oh, I'd like this. I don't need it to be a very excited expensive one.
Autumn
Okay.
B
A guitar. So I can. I can learn to play. I can strum a few chords. But my. My dad and both of my brothers are phenomenal guitar players.
Autumn
Like acoustic.
C
Yeah.
B
Acoustic and electric. My brother Joey plays every instrument. But I'd like an acoustic guitar.
Autumn
Got it.
B
But there's a lot to that. Like, also, I would need to learn how to tune it, But. But I want to start learning that. And it's an easy thing to learn because you can just pick it up and strum it. And they also look cool if they're hanging on your wall.
Autumn
But to my Donald's mom and dad, don't get him some fake ass che guitar, because he's gonna look at you and be like, no, wait, no.
B
I am gonna throw some shade at my mom and dad right now. I feel bad if my mom listens, because two Christmases ago, I forgot about this until this conversation. We were, like, talking about it, and she was like, oh, yeah, guitar. Okay, that's cool. She was like, don't get a guitar. Because I was like, maybe I'll buy one. Like, literally, I would practice my first one. I'm like, to see if it's something I stick with. I'd. I wouldn't even spend maybe 200 bucks on, like, not a really expensive guitar. So they were like, don't get one. I was like, okay. So I'm just geared up. And when I tell you Christmas came and there was not a guitar under that tree. I was looking around, and they're like, all right, guys, what do you want to eat? And I'm like, I didn't say it. It's the first time that they're gonna hear about it. But I was like, you told me not to get one. Was that just you telling me? It's not. You're not for you. Exactly. You're the singer, baby. You sing. That's your instrument.
Autumn
You sing your little heart out.
C
Yeah.
B
So funny.
Autumn
But that's funny.
B
General to your point. I. I feel like the beauty in gifts really is the gesture, so it is weird to say, what do you want? Unless you're buying for someone, you have no idea what they like. But I don't know, I don't think, like, if I didn't know what to get someone and I wanted to get an actual gift, I would call some of my friends with some ideas and.
Autumn
Be like, what do you think about somebody that. That is of kind, that might have a better understanding?
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Yeah. But people, you know, I know, like I said, they view it a lot. So it's like, okay, so if somebody. And this could be any context. It could be boyfriend, it could be parent, it could be friend. So if somebody were to say to you, what do you want? Would across the board, you always just say, you don't have to get me anything? Or would you. One person you would tell something to, the other one you would say nothing. The other one you would maybe vague it out.
B
I think with. I think with a partner, it's nice to mention things that you'd like that maybe you're not going to get yourself. But some gift ideas as they come. But no, I don't really. The thing is, like, I'm not going to ask. I don't want to be specific because I'm very particular about things. And so I'm just like. I appreciate the gesture. Um, like, if I wanted art for my wall, that's great. But if you get me art that I'm not into.
Autumn
No, that's a really concise one.
B
But clothes are kind of like that for me too. Like a. A cloth shirt or something is a nice gesture, but if I don't like it, if it's not my vibe, it's going to be hanging in my closet. And until I toss it or I'll return it. Yeah. And I think that should be normal.
Autumn
Okay, that was my next question. Returns and regifts. Oh, acceptable. Or.
B
I'm thinking. I'm trying to think. If I. I think returns. Definitely. I think actually these rings I have on are because I exchanged a gift that you got me.
Autumn
I know. I forget what it was I got you. I think I. Did I get you a bracelet? You got me a bracelet from Louis?
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Yeah. And you got the rings instead.
B
I got the rings instead because the bracelet just wasn't something I would have worn as much. And I was like. I felt. I was like, I know Autumn. She will want me to have something that I'm really gonna get a lot of use out of for sure. And so I exchanged it.
Autumn
Yeah.
B
For those. And so I. That's what I would want people to do.
Autumn
You told me. You told me right away. You were like. Just so you know, I exchanged it because I saw these rings, and I think I'll wear them more. And you wear those rings every single.
B
Day like they're beat to hell. Yeah. I just love them. I think they're so cute.
Autumn
So I love that you were able to. To get something, and I know you very much appreciated what I got you, so I didn't take it to heart like that. You know, it's like, you do the best you can, and if somebody wants to. So I do. I agree with you that returns should be acceptable. Do you have to tell the person you returned it, or is it just acceptable?
B
See, I think it really depends if.
Autumn
Because if you don't tell them and they're. And maybe it's something that they would wear, they keep looking to see if you're going to wear it.
C
Yeah.
B
So it's like, honestly, if anyone takes anything away from this episode, it's. You can't con. Your gift isn't a key into someone's life to control them. And, like. You know what I mean? Why are you wearing it? It's like. Do you want me to say that part out loud? Because I don't like it, heifer. Like, it ain't my style. That's why I'm not wearing it. I thought you would. You know, one. One equals two, but I guess I'll spell it out for you. Oh, what do you think?
Autumn
I think you're fucking hilarious. Just so you know, I love it so much. Yeah. I don't know that I would. I'm trying to think if there's ever. I mean, I'm sure there's something. I've returned this necklace. I have on my triangle necklace that everybody loves so much. It was an exchange, and there was, like, two necklaces that my boyfriend had got me, and I love them, but actually it was that one of them was similar to one I already had. And I was like, why do you have one like this? And I know he doesn't remember all my. Like, he didn't remember all the jewelry I had. And I went in just to see what else they had, and I saw this one, and I just am obsessed with this one. And I did tell him like that I exchanged it. And I think a little, there was like a little part of them was probably like. But I. He always had great taste with stuff that he got me. So I was like, okay, if it wasn't that I didn't like it, it was actually that you got me something similar to what I already had. So like the taste was still good. I just already had it. But I did tell them. So I guess it depends on the context if I would tell somebody or not.
C
Yeah, like.
B
Partner, spouse, you gotta tell. Like, this means so much to me, but I actually think I'd wear this more in. In my universe, there's no reality that I'm upset about that. Same same with family member. Like anything, if I give something to any of my family members and they want to exchange it or return it, I'd be like, oh sure, I thought it was cute. But if it's not your vibe or if you already have or if you're not going to wear it, then get something you like.
Autumn
Yeah. And I always try to indicate that because that's, you know, what gift receipts are for.
B
Exactly.
Autumn
So if you put a gift receipt in for me, then you've given me the go to go ahead and exchange it if I want to. So you can't put a gift receipt in also and then be mad about it.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Okay. But what about re gifting?
B
Re gifting? Yeah. I'm here for it. I think re gifting is great for things like white elephant games or like, if you like, you know what I know I've done, if someone brings me a bottle of wine.
Autumn
Yes.
B
And then I go somewhere, I might grab that bottle of wine and bring that. It's like the traveling bottle of wine to be a gift. And you know, at that point it really is for the gesture and it's fine.
Autumn
And I think something like alcohol, that's probably not a super sentimental, like unless somebody went above and beyond and was like a really expensive bottle or like a unique bottle or something like that. In which case you would probably know that I'm with you for sure on the re gifting of alcohol. Things that are a little bit more general, like a candle. Like I'm not a candle person, but people have given me candles before. I just don't like candles in my house in general. Like, it's just not my go to. So I've re gifted candles because what is the other option? To throw it out? Like, of course I'm not going to throw it out, but I'm also not going to go try to return or exchange a candle.
B
Right.
Autumn
So if there's somebody else that I think that I know likes candles that would really like that, then yeah, I'll. Or I. I'll re. Gift slash, give away. Give two. Like, I don't necessarily be like, oh, I'm gonna save this candle to somebody's birthday. I might just give it to somebody like, oh, I got this. And like, I'm just not a candle person. Do you want it? Like, yeah, kind of thing. So I think again, that that's good. Like, it's acceptable, I think. Go ahead.
B
If it's a sentimental thing, definitely that is different. Like, I wouldn't do. I wouldn't just regift that. One time, someone gave me an old Louis Vuitton bag that they had. So it was kind of a weird gift because it wasn't for. It wasn't a weird gift, but it was a used gift. It was a Louis Vuitton that they had that they gave to me, and I appreciated that, but it wasn't like the, like, they bought the one that I wanted for me.
Autumn
This one's gonna look a Louis Vuitton smug in the face.
B
No, I ended up giving it to my mom.
Autumn
Oh, okay.
B
And I feel like I felt good about that because I'm like, this is really a really nice gesture, but I'm really not going to use this, like, weekend Louis bag. And my mom doesn't. Didn't have any Louis Vuitton. And I was like, okay, I'm just gonna give that to her. So I guess maybe I just break all the rules. I don't know. Now that I think about it, I.
Autumn
Think again, you know, which friends or. Or loved ones might be offended by it and, you know, which ones wouldn't be. So I guess it all comes down to the context of what it was given to you for.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
What. What that person could do in terms of a gift. Like, you don't want to make somebody feel bad if they're like, this is what I can do. And. And I really wanted to do something special for you.
B
Right.
Autumn
But yeah, gift giving, man.
B
I think it's kind of stressed me out, actually. As I'm thinking of this, I'm like, oh, what am I gon person this year that per. You know. But I think it is important for people to remember it really is just that someone thought of you. And I am committed to not letting that rob my joy of, like, holiday seasons or birthday. I mean, I used to have real anxiety, you Know when people open up gifts in front of people?
Autumn
Yeah.
B
I'd be like, oh, they're gonna get to my gift. Everyone's gonna laugh at it. You know what I mean? Like, my gifts suck. Sucks, because it just was never my thing. But. But now I feel better about it because I think I just don't overthink it so much.
Autumn
Yeah, I do think that that's a good one. I feel like we should definitely revisit gift giving as we get a little closer to holidays and maybe you and I. Okay. I just think in general, women have a hard time buying gifts for guys.
B
Okay.
Autumn
Like, I think men are a little bit harder to buy for. Like, I can't tell you how many blog articles I've looked up over the years. Like, what's the un. Unique gift? What's that like? And they always say the same things for guys. And I'm like, these are the lamest gift ideas. It's like, tools for dad. And I'm like, I bet dad doesn't want tools. Every year he's been like, my kids hate me. Like, you know, like, yeah, oh, I got a wrench. You know? Like, I mean, fine, if your dad's like a carpenter or something, then maybe tools. But, like, at a certain point, tools are right. Like, they. How excited are they going to get about it? I don't know.
B
It's hard. But that. My dad is a hard one, too.
Autumn
Like, oh, I know what to get your dad.
B
He. He was. He's into records.
Autumn
Oh.
B
But at some point, it's like, okay, he has every record now. Like, he doesn't have every record.
Autumn
But that leads me to another question. So, like you said, oh, like, he's into records, but he has a bunch. So when somebody's into something and they have a bunch of it, do you buy them more or do you. Are you like, okay, they have a bunch. Like, right.
B
So one year, I bought him this. This record cleaning system that you put it in the. So he could use for his record. But then my dad, I kind of. He is the. Of adults in my life, I buy him the most toy, like, things. Like, I bought him a drone. Just a little drone one year. You know, stuff like that. That. And I. I feel like I. Because it is like, you know, especially guys like my dad, who. He doesn't really care that much about what he's wearing. You know what I mean? Like, he's a basic. In terms of, you know, he puts on a shirt, he wants it to look. He wants to look nice, right? But he's not like some fashionista trying to get a certain fit. So it's hard to know.
Autumn
But yeah, like, they'll say tools. They'll say, oh, like grooming stuff. Like this man's shaving thing. And I'm like, is that exciting to open up? I don't think it is.
B
Right. One of my brothers, I don't remember his last year, the year before I got him shaver that I use that I really like.
Autumn
Okay.
B
And I was like, this gift sucks. So then I also got him a shirt and I was like, okay. Talk about throwaway gifts. Like, you know, well, it depends on.
Autumn
The shirt is because you have very good style and stuff. But yeah, or they'll. I'm going through the list in my head of what they say for guys. Barbecue stuff, alcohol. And I'm like, so we need to do some deep research of, like, what gifts are good to give guys in different price ranges, be it a brother, a dad, a significant other, a best friend. Like, they're hard to buy for. That's where I try to go to same. Like, I try to go to experiences. Like, again, if. If somebody's into a sports team. So for Dom's dad, Kent, like, I've gotten him tickets to, like, the Rams or not the Rams, the Chargers before, for. Because he's the same thing. He's hard to buy for. I'm like, I don't like, what do you want? Like, yeah, and he always does very sentimental gifts for me. Like, he'll have a blanket made with a bunch of different old photos of Dom on it. Or he'll, like, frame photos for me to hang on the wall of me and Dom that are, like, good photos. He's done photo books before, so I do think sentimental gifts like that are good.
B
Yeah, I like. I like ones that are like, like for. For our rap gifts. The last two times we filmed that, I was a part of it. I gave like, a custom pair of socks in one and then like, the mug. I think that kind of stuff is really cute.
Autumn
That is really cute too. But I like to do we're going this place or things like that. But anyways, I think we should revisit it. I think we should do some deep research and come up with good gifts ideas. Not just for guys. We'll do it for girls, too.
B
But before, cannabis was legal in Arizona, where we celebrate. My family celebrates Christmas, but it was legal here. I told my mom I was going to get everyone cannabis products and they'd be packaged and nice. She's like, oh, my God, I cannot believe you're going to do that. I don't think you should do that. It's obviously years ago, but so. Because I was so excited about that, I'm like, let's talk about a nice Christmas.
Autumn
Everybody's going to be so happy.
B
Exactly.
Autumn
You just make your pumpkin pies, mom.
B
Exactly. You have the pies ready? I'll. I'll get them ready for your pies.
Autumn
Like, we got along so well.
B
Exactly. So.
C
Yeah.
B
Because you're right. It's hard to know. For guys especially, girls are more fun because of, like, clothes and jewelry and cute stuff. As long as they can return it.
Autumn
Yes. But again, what. What do you say to, like, the person who has a bunch of something Like, I know you said for your dad, like, oh, he has a bunch of records. You got him record cleaning stuff. But like an easy. Okay, an easy go to. For me, anytime a birthday or holiday comes up, like spa gift cards or something, I always get people just like. Because they know I work out so hard, so obviously a massage or a little pampering. And by the way, I love it. Like, it's a. It's a great gift. But, like, people give me that all the time. Workout clothes. Great gift. I love it. You could, like. I could never have too many workout clothes.
B
So for me, you like.
Autumn
I like those things. I'm saying, though, like, would there be something that would be, like, too much of. I don't know, do you have something that you have a lot of?
B
No.
Autumn
Okay.
B
I feel like I should be easy to buy for, except I am particular, so I might not like what it is. And a lot of my friends who've bought me gifts, I do exchange them or return them because they're just something that I wouldn't get a lot of use out of.
Autumn
Good to know. But Donald gets gift cards.
B
I sometimes.
C
Yeah.
B
I sometimes like cologne. I mean, I'm. I feel like I'm pretty. I feel like if someone sees something and they think I like it and they get it for me, then it's probably good.
Autumn
Yeah. I love. Look. Clothes are an easy one for me. Like, but, you know, like, I love fashion, I love jewelry, and it doesn't have to be expensive stuff. Like, there's just, like, the cool trendy stuff. That's an easy one for me. I mean, I love shoes. And again, not could be Nikes. It could be fancy shoes, but those are ones where you kind of have to know the person's side.
C
Yeah.
B
And I don't know, it's like, hard. See? But it's because it's not my thing. I think shoes, no gift giving. Because I don't know. I would. If someone was like, go buy ottoman gift right now, I'd be like, I'm gonna have to leave here and never come back. I don't know what to get this. There goes the wretch.
C
Crazy.
B
I mean.
C
Yeah.
B
Because why do you get someone who cons, you know, conceivably has everything?
Autumn
Well, again, I think it has a little bit more. Like, I saw this because I thought you would like it.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Yeah.
B
Well, I got you an orchid. I do think plants are fun.
Autumn
I love the orchid.
B
Plants are fun. I do.
Autumn
Like, I mean, I don't have a green thumb, so that only lasts so long.
C
But I did.
B
I did kind of look at it like, the orchid. Like, baby, I'm sorry, but where I'm sending you, you may not live long.
Autumn
You said you don't keep orchids alive long anyways.
B
Yeah, no, I don't get. I think they're beautiful.
Autumn
But is it. Is it bad to let people know? Because weddings, you're allowed to do, like, weddings now. Like, it used to always be you had to register, blah, blah, and now people kind of get to quote, unquote, register for cash for, like, the honeymoon. Or, like, buy us, like, they do their whole honeymoon planning. And then they'll say, like, you could go to a website. You could pay for their spa treatment or pay for their dinner one night or pay for it, like, so that different events. Or their horse good. They're gonna horseback riding. You can buy that for them. Which I think is pretty cool, because that you're kind of. Or you can just give them money that they'll have that they could spend or furnish their house or whatever. And I was thinking about that, like, because I have had people ask me over the years, like, what? What do you want? And sometimes I'm like, what I really want is I'm just saving to remodel the kitchen.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
And like, no, nobody's gonna just hand me the money I need to remodel a kitchen. Yeah, but you're like, oh, if over the years, if it was like. And by the way, if somebody gives you 10 bucks and you put it towards a remodel of your kitchen, fine, whatever. Like, that's a thing. You know what I'm saying? Like, so is it wrong to sort of let people know, well, I'm saving for this? So if you wanted to contribute whatever amount.
B
No, I think that's good to do. And you know what I tell people also. It just occurred to me if someone's like, what do you want? I love, like, interesting glassware. I think it's fun and fun to decorate. I like to serve drinks in different kinds of glasses.
Autumn
And you're talking about cocktail glassware.
B
Yeah, cocktail. Maybe interesting martini glasses is. Or maybe maybe like tall glasses you could serve with a pitcher. You could serve some ice. I love that. Kind of.
Autumn
At a certain point, don't you run out of room that.
B
Well, that's the thing. If I tell everybody that I'm gonna.
Autumn
Be like, okay, now Donald's only getting glasses.
B
Exactly.
C
Yeah.
B
Well, I guess the fun is it's a surprise.
Autumn
The art of gift giving. You know what I don't like to do?
B
What?
Autumn
I don't like to wrap it. It. Oh, I can't wrap to save my life.
B
Mining it ain't pretty. But I'm like, they're just gonna rip this off anyways.
Autumn
I know, but you know how some people are great at making everything pretty? And like, just the presents under the tree look like a gift in and of itself. You barely want to open the wrapper because. No, mine looks like a two year old did it every time. Like, I sometimes just so the presents are pretty under the tree, when I'm buying them at the mall, I go to the gift wrapping station. I did it last year and I sat there and waited. Like, literally, it took them like an hour and a half. It was like four presents for Dom. I was like, what is taking so long? But of course it's beautiful. And I'm like, that's what's taking. That's why, Autumn, you have no patience. But are you a good gift wrapper? No.
B
So I'm not great. But one year I wrapped a gift with leftover, like the holiday sales ad paper. And it looks so cool the way I lined it up. And my. I made my own bow with it. And everyone looks at the present like, oh, my God, this is so cool. And it was literally like a newspaper ad wrapping paper. But it was that I'm. I mean, it wasn't wrapping paper, but I used it to be wrapping paper. And I felt like a pretty bad doing that.
Autumn
Did you see that one episode where Kim Kardashian used skims fabric to wrap all the gifts? I mean, she didn't wrap the gifts.
B
Of course, but I was like, that's next level.
Autumn
That was. That's always next level for them.
C
Yeah. Yeah.
B
My. My wish list might be a little different. If Kim. Kim was providing the gifts.
Autumn
If a Kardashian's buying me a present, I'm for sure gonna tell them what I want. I have a list.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
The kitchen starts with the pantry.
B
Right. Well.
Autumn
Where are we at? This has been fun.
B
It has.
Autumn
I think these are. Listen, I know it seems so, like, surface level, but you. Everybody gives gifts and receives gifts all.
B
Year long, and it's a lot of pressure. And the truth is, on a serious note, the pressure of gift giving and stress of finances and keeping up with the Joneses around the holidays really did rob joy from my holidays for a long time. And I appreciate. Now I feel like I've recovered from that and come out of that.
C
That.
B
And if anyone out there is struggling with that, just know you're not alone. And it's not about that. It's about spending time with family and loved ones. And if someone doesn't like you because of the gifts, you give them. That.
Autumn
Yeah. That's not a.
B
That's not a friend.
Autumn
That's not a friend. Or check in on that loved one. Like, put them in check.
B
Exactly.
Autumn
Man. I just had a whole nother road I wanted to go down with it. Well, I. The only thing I was gonna say was, like, all the holiday sales. Right. Like, it used to be, okay, Black Friday. And that was like, oh, you go to the mall late at night, like, and you shop.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
At night. Like, into Friday morning.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
Or you got up super early the day after Thanksgiving, and, you know, 6am and you're at the mall and you're doing the shopping. And then it was like, Black Friday, Cyber Monday. And then it turned into, like, whatever they do the week before. And now it's, like, starting. Come October, sales start happening for Christmas so early that it actually brings the pressure on so much earlier. Because now you're looking at the sales, like, should I buy it now? Should I wait and see what else comes? What? Like, it's just, like, a constant on your mind thing. So it is. It can really rob you of it. It can be fun, but it can be stressful, very overwhelming. And, like, you know, some people can get their feelings hurt if they're really, like, excited about giving a gift.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
And then it's not well received or somebody returns it. So I think, you know, just find the balance. Find the balance. Have the conversations. Let's open it up, you know.
C
Yeah.
Autumn
What's acceptable, what's not. Maybe we're the.
B
Maybe.
Autumn
Maybe we're the drama.
B
Gifts left and right. We're not. Are we the problem? Are we the drama?
Autumn
Maybe.
B
Anyways.
Autumn
Anyway. I can't wait to see what happens for Christmas.
B
I can't wait to see what you get me.
Autumn
We're gonna open. We're gonna open. Dresses is on the podcast.
B
That's right. That would be fun.
Autumn
We have. We have responsibilities that we have to do. We have to plan our event. I think we're going to plan it for after the new year. We got a lot of emails about people really excited about the fact that we were talking about doing an event or a retreat or both. Lots of people very excited. So we got those emails. We're in the works of planning it. It's probably going to be early in 2026 that we'll do something.
C
Yeah.
B
So stay tuned for that. And as always, tune in every week. Please reach out. We love getting your emails@everythingsperfectpodcast gmail.com and if you're not following us on Instagram, give us a follow.
Autumn
Everything's perfect. Official. Like, subscribe and don't forget to leave a comment.
B
See?
Autumn
Turned into the.
B
The outro. Outro of our box. Absolutely. We should just play his voice every time. Have a good one, you guys. We'll see you next week.
Autumn
But if y' all want to send us a gift, we love it. Bring it.
B
Very expensive ones.
In this lively episode, best friends Autumn and Donald dig into the complex emotional landscape of gift giving—why it’s fun, why it’s fraught, and why the pressure to get it “just right” can sometimes steal the joy. They share personal stories about birthdays, holidays, and the mixed feelings around giving, receiving, returning, and regifting. With humor and honesty, they unpack love languages, family gift traditions, and social expectations, offering relatability and a few memorable laughs along the way.
Autumn’s 45th Birthday:
“She pops her head through these...red curtains, and she's like, like, horror scream.” (04:24)
Experience vs. Material Gifts:
“What do you get the person who has everything? And the answer was experience.” (07:00)
Personal Styles:
“I fucking hate it. I'm not good at it. And it's always...about it needs to be the perfect gift.” (09:41)
Gift Fatigue and Holiday Burnout:
Shopping Strategies:
“I really wanted Barbies...I was shocked that Christmas to open up...an Aladdin and Jasmine Barbie.” (18:02)
When Someone Asks What You Want:
Returns & Regifting:
“Your gift isn't a key into someone's life to control them...Why are you wearing it?...Because I don't like it, heifer.” (26:16)
Financial & Social Stress:
“The pressure of gift giving and stress of finances and keeping up with the Joneses...really did rob joy from my holidays for a long time.” (43:41)
Gift Opening Anxiety:
Stereotypical “Guy Gifts” Are Overrated:
Sentimental & Custom Gifts:
Is It Okay to Suggest “Cash Gifts” or Contributions?
Types of Gifts They Enjoy:
On birthday reality checks:
“Dominic...said, ‘just five more years till 50.’ I was like, that's rude.” – Autumn (01:20)
Perspective on returns:
“You can’t put a gift receipt in and then be mad about it.” – Autumn (28:25)
Gift giving isn’t leverage:
“Your gift isn’t a key into someone’s life to control them...Do you want me to say that part out loud? Because I don’t like it, heifer.” – Donald (26:10)
Regifting Philosophy:
“I think regifting is great for things like white elephant games...at that point, it really is for the gesture.” – Donald (28:39)
Holiday Joy vs. Pressure:
“If someone doesn’t like you because of the gifts you give them...That’s not a friend.” – Autumn (44:14)
This episode brings heart and humor to a universal struggle: navigating the maze of modern gift giving. Autumn and Donald’s stories, empathy, and laughter offer permission to step back, set boundaries, and focus on what really matters—connection, not perfection.