Nobody hands boys a blueprint for fatherhood. In this episode, we unpack why the father role is one of the most under examined forces in psychology, and how it quietly sets a child's self-worth, nervous system and sense of what is safe to allow into their life. We look at the patriarchal scripts fathers inherited and passed down, the myth that dad exists to balance out mom's emotion, and why so many men arrive in their thirties having never once pictured themselves as a parent.

This is not a man bashing session. It is a call to the dads, the future dads, the uncles and the men who never had a father figure of their own. We break down the words that actually define the role: encouragement, play, leadership, attunement, reliability and safety. We share stories from the therapy room about direct and indirect harm, the gymnastics dad who got it right, and one gamified daily practice that costs nothing and changes the trajectory of a family.

Here's a related episode that builds on today's conversation:
#459 | What Your Family System Role Says About You - https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/evolve-ventures/id1511831621?i=1000740185898

Bianca mentions this episode early in the conversation:
#507 | Breaking Down Patriarchy, Matriarchy, And Our Role Within It - https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/evolve-ventures/id1511831621?i=1000769445396

Learn more about:

🤝 Out of the Mud (OOTM) - "The Difference Between Avoidance and Self-Protection" - https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/IykObX8eR7ixJaQ-qqZogw#/registration

📆 Evolve Group Coaching - https://evolveventurestech.com/evolve-group-coaching/

📽️ Insightful films. Meaningful growth. Join our Evolve Movie Club - https://forms.gle/bBZUbFEeD2ijypCT7

🌱 The #YouDoYou Therapy Program gives you support when and how you need it. No pressure. Just real help. Start your free 7-day trial today - https://buy.stripe.com/fZe8Avdfx8bW9gcfZc

Connect with Emilia, Bianca & the EVOLVE VENTURES Community:

Website: http://www.evolveventurestech.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/evolveventures/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/EvolveVenturesTech (Public Page)

Evolve Ventures Society (Private Facebook Group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/457130589193794

Emilia's IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithemilia/

Emilia's TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithemilia

Bianca's IG - https://www.instagram.com/evolvewithbianca/

Bianca's TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@evolvewithbianca?_t=8gq3wqu4fAx&_r=1

Connect with Emilia from Evolve Ventures for FREE:

https://calendly.com/emiliasmith/free-evp-communityconnect

Show notes:

(0:00) Intro
(1:49) Why the father role matters now more than ever
(6:05) Patriarchal norms fathers inherited and passed down
(7:47) How low self-worth traces back to dad
(12:04) The myth that dad is there to balance out emotion
(15:22) Boys are never taught to imagine fatherhood
(19:28) Play matters, but not at the expense of showing up
(22:50) Reactive parenting when the damage is already done
(26:02) Ego and the fear of failing as a father
(26:43) Bianca invites listeners to join Out of the Mud, the free live virtual event hosted the last Wednesday of every month.
(27:21) You cannot nurture what you were never taught to feel
(29:39) Encouragement, play, leadership, attunement, reliability
(34:46) Direct and indirect harm in the father role
(37:31) The gymnastics dad and what safety looks like
(40:56) One daily tool: name a new emotion
(42:56) Outro

***Leave them a 5-star review if you felt their energy, became inspired, or felt the value was added to your life in your EVOLUTION.

(Stay tuned for this coming Thursday's episode!)