← EXPANDED Podcast by To Be Magnetic™
EXPANDED Podcast by To Be Magnetic™
Ep. 385 - Beth Behrs on Manifesting Her Acting Career, Letting Go of “Enoughness,” and Embracing Surrender
01:10:13
What if the deeper purpose of your career, relationships, or home wasn’t about the goal itself, but about reconnecting with the truest version of you? In this heartfelt conversation, actress Beth Behrs (Two Broke Girls, The Neighborhood) joins Jessica to explore the evolution of her manifestation practice—from hyper-specific manifestation lists in her 20s to soul-rooted simplicity in her late 30s. Through TBM tools, EMDR, the grounding presence of horses, and motherhood, Beth shares how healing childhood wounds of feeling “not enough” helped her redefine purpose, release perfectionism, and rediscover joyful creativity. Though there’s no single roadmap to success in creative fields, Beth's story offers powerful expansion for anyone with a deep drive who’s willing to follow the universe’s signals toward aligned expression. It’s a reminder that passion and purpose are allowed to evolve—and that anchoring into authenticity is what life is truly about. This episode is an invitation t...
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- [00:00]
Beth Behrs
I think it's so important to have something that lights you up in your life. So if acting is what lights you up, act, put on plays in your backyard. Not because you want to get a TV show, but because it brings you so much joy. Find what it is for you.
- [00:20]
Lacy Phillips
Have you been looking for expanders who are doing their very unique gifts, passion, essence, but through the lens of their authentic self? Today we have on very talented actress Beth Behrs to describe how she is connecting to her authenticity even deeper in this season of life, both with her career, with her family, with manifesting her home, and how the TBM tools have been so instrumental for her.
- [00:52]
Jessica Ortner
This, this is quite an extensive one.
- [00:54]
Lacy Phillips
Especially for anyone who is in an industry or field that is changing. How do you show up authentically when you have so much input that things need to look a certain way or be a certain way, or that the industry can only function in one way? How can you expand past that, see the potential and still bring your essence, your authenticity, your gifts to the table? We are in the depths of our return to magic 15 day manifestation challenge right now. We just went through phases one and two, trust and safety, autonomy and boundaries. And now we're moving into phases three and four. Creativity and play and competence and confidence.
- [01:35]
Jessica Ortner
I have to say that this is.
- [01:38]
Lacy Phillips
Probably the most powerful challenge I have ever done with tbm, just even as a consumer, because this is completely rewiring my nervous system to safety. It is grounding me back into myself. I'm reconnecting with my magic, with my play, with the things that really matter.
- [02:02]
Jessica Ortner
And there's honestly no better time to.
- [02:05]
Lacy Phillips
Be doing this type of work than before the new Year. Before you want to craft your list and set your New Year's intentions and all of those things, get down to what actually deeply matters in your soul and manifest from that place. I think there's going to be so.
- [02:24]
Jessica Ortner
Much change and upheaval and systems are.
- [02:29]
Lacy Phillips
Going to crumble in the way in which we know them and the workforce is going to crumble in the way in which we know it. And that's not at all to scare anyone. It's just to get your mind prepared that things may change, but the one certain, the one constant is our authentic self, is our gifts, is our joy, is our magic.
- [02:48]
Jessica Ortner
We have that within us.
- [02:49]
Lacy Phillips
No one can take that. We can connect with it at any time. And this challenge for me at least, is this full immersion back to this part of self that I really haven't spent enough time honoring and connecting to.
- [03:04]
Jessica Ortner
And surprisingly enough, or maybe not surprisingly.
- [03:08]
Lacy Phillips
That inner child part has the keys, has my magic, has my authenticity, has how I want to ground and how.
- [03:17]
Jessica Ortner
I want to play, and the things that nourish me and the things that.
- [03:20]
Lacy Phillips
Prevent me from burning out or giving too much or not having boundaries in certain areas, like, it actually has all the keys. And so I just invite any of you, if you get the ping, to join us, please join us. If you check out my Instagram broadcast channel, the most amazing manifestations are coming through to people. The most clarity, the most profound, deep healing is happening. This is a big one, guys. I'm really excited for you just going through this. I know it has been so insanely potent for me and I can't wait to see what lays on the other side.
- [03:56]
Jessica Ortner
But even before we're on the other side, as I'm in it, I'm just.
- [04:00]
Lacy Phillips
So grateful to have these tools to lean on, especially during this time, and just so euphoric that I have this thread back to me in this season.
- [04:11]
Jessica Ortner
So if you feel the ping, if.
- [04:13]
Lacy Phillips
You'Re getting the calling, please join us. We have our biggest sale going on right now. 30% off our membership.
- [04:20]
Jessica Ortner
So you can join.
- [04:20]
Lacy Phillips
You can have a full year of TBM at that discounted rate. Join the challenge. It will be open into the new year, so you can start anytime. It's not too late, and I truly cannot wait to see you guys in there. This is where the magic happens. Okay, let's get into the episode. And now a word from our partners. I don't know about you, but maybe it's because we're getting into the chillier months, or maybe it's just that time of year where there's so much going on. But I have been really craving stillness, gentle ritual, slow practices that bring me back into the present. That's why when I heard Anima Mundi was launching a set of ritual candles, I could not be more excited. They are launching five signature candles to start each. Handcrafted organic beeswax and pure soy. All natural dyes, toxin free, sustainably sourced. And all vibrant colors with spellbinding energy designed to elevate altar or ritual space. Each one crafted with a different intention. One for creativity, self love, intuition, protection and prosperity. And each one is covered in a special blend of herbs and flowers to enhance each of the themes. Things like mugwort, lavender, blue lotus, hibiscus, rose petals or lemon balm. I cannot wait to pair these with my TBM practice. So as we kick off and head into the book club, and the end of year challenge. Every time I go to do my TBM work each week, I am lighting one of these candles, setting an intention, and knowing that I am calling in and manifesting with this towards my highest good. It feels like the best way to just set the energy, the intention of the space before I dive into all of this healing work and all of this alchemy work that we're going to jump into this season with tbm. You can even set the candle before you have a journaling session or you're going to do some big creative project, or if you're tapping in more to your psychic or intuitive gifts, light the candle as that intention, that north star, that guiding light to be in the space with you. If you are getting the ping to create more of an altar or a ritual for yourself to slow down this season, I highly recommend checking out the ritual candles. You can go to animamundiherbals.com and use the code TBM, all caps 20 for 20% off your purchase. Again, that is TBM 20, all caps for 20 off your purchase. Or check out the link in the show notes. And now onto the episode.
- [07:09]
Jessica Ortner
Well, Beth Bears, so welcome back on the expanded podcast. We're so excited to have you.
- [07:15]
Beth Behrs
Oh, my God, Jessica. It's been a while. I feel like I already know you, though, because I've listened so many years to this podcast and I'm like, I already know Jess. Jess and I are on a jest basis.
- [07:25]
Jessica Ortner
Yes. First name basis. We got this.
- [07:28]
Beth Behrs
I know. I did it. What was I like, your third episode, I think, or something.
- [07:32]
Jessica Ortner
Yeah, it's really cool, the evolution. And I remember being like, literally shocked when you were on the podcast because I have watched shows that you've been in, I've watched your work and I was like, wait, this is so cool to see the person behind the characters. This is fascinating. Like, blowing my, like, small suburban Jersey town brain of everything. And just seeing the woman, the person that you've become and how authentically you share and just watching your life transform through motherhood and then connecting with animals and the land and your home, there's just such a rootedness and so much of everything that you put out there and connect with everyone on. So it's been really beautiful to watch your journey as well.
- [08:18]
Beth Behrs
Well, that's thanks to this work. I mean, honestly, I started it. I mean, thank you for saying all that. That's very kind. I feel the same way about you. I'm like, I think that's why I feel like I Already know you because there's such a beautiful authenticity and groundedness. And I'm like, oh, she got her house, her dream house. I'm, like, rooting for you behind the scenes. But I do credit. I mean, Lacey had a blog called Free and Native, probably right when Instagram started. I assume that's when we connected over. I don't even know. And I was telling you before we even were recording that I was so into this work in the beginning and no one really knew about it. So I invited all my girlfriends over to my house. I think we had like 12 women. And Lacey came in a. We sat in a circle in my living room and we each talked about our manifestation process, what we wanted to manifest. And Lacey would, like, sit and talk to each of us. It was so cool. So we've come a long way, me and Lacey, and we're mothers now. And yeah, I credit this work to really finding out authentically who I am, dealing with the constant repetition of the programming and learning how to break that cycle from childhood and then using it still day to day today.
- [09:34]
Jessica Ortner
Truly, one of the things that we were talking about before we started recording was how when you're doing the work for a while, your relationship to it shifts over time. What your authentic code looks like, what your list looks like, how you go about tackling the work when you use it. How has that transformed for you as someone who has been using these tools for over a decade?
- [09:59]
Beth Behrs
When I first started, so when I really dove in, like the time in my life where tbm I was doing it every single day, was the transition between my show two Broke Girls onto the neighborhood. I literally. The neighborhood was everything on my list of what I wanted in my next acting job. But what's changed is my lists were three pages long. I had such a specificity in my. My list. And I was telling you, my human design is generator and I am one who is a specific, not a non specific. So I was like, oh, I'm supposed to write these long lists. But I was in my 20s and now I'm about to be 40. And my list now is so simple. I have one expander. I had pages of lists of expanders for different things. And it's just simplicity is like literally simplicity and surrender are my two words for the way I'm moving forward in this work now.
- [10:59]
Jessica Ortner
So what is the one word or one thing you're manifesting right now?
- [11:03]
Beth Behrs
My one actual manifest thing on my list is an acting job that utilizes the depth of my talent without compromising my Life with my family. That's just because I'm in this massive transition. I've been on network television for almost 16 years. We're going into our eighth season on the neighborhood. I was on 2 Broke Girls for six. Crazy. I'm so lucky. And so this is, like, a massive transition for me of what's next. And I wasn't a mother before. Now I am. And so much shoots all over the world. It's not in Los Angeles. And what does that look like? And so that is my pared down one objective. But I wrote. My expander is Olivia Colman. She started on sitcom. She's my one expander because I think she does a beautiful job. And she's talked about it of having this super rich creative life and living in the countryside and raising her three children and being a mother. And so I'm like, I don't really need another expander. That's it for me. I see myself in her trajectory. She didn't get broad church till her 40s. There's, like, a lot of parallels that I can, like, see in myself. She's not going to the Met gala.
- [12:14]
Lacy Phillips
No.
- [12:14]
Beth Behrs
No shade at the Met Gala or things. But I've just never authentically felt like the girl who was gonna, like, on the COVID of Vogue in Chanel. That's just. I'm a cowgirl, so. But I did write a little, like. And I don't know if this is helpful to people, but I wrote, like, a little Dear Me that I read every day.
- [12:33]
Jessica Ortner
I love this. Okay, keep going.
- [12:36]
Beth Behrs
Okay.
- [12:36]
Jessica Ortner
All right.
- [12:37]
Beth Behrs
Do you want me to read it to you?
- [12:39]
Jessica Ortner
Yes, yes. Give us all of it.
- [12:42]
Beth Behrs
Okay. So Dear Me, this isn't about becoming Olivia Colman. It's about becoming the artist I was born to be. One who listens, who breathes, who knows when to be still. I've spent years learning to be seen. But this season is about learning to be felt. I'm stepping into a new rhythm, One that's slower, wiser, funnier, and braver. A life that unfolds between barn mornings and bright lit stages, between laughter and silence, between the public and the sacred private. I trust that my magnetism comes from my truth. I no longer chase, I attract. I no longer perform. I embody. That's my, like, gosh, I'm obsessed. Cause I was like, I have to read something every morning. That's not just, like, I want an acting job that does that. I have to, like, I feel like, for me. And you can, I'm sure, speak to this even more deeply. Than me. But in my process I have to feel what I want to manifest. If that makes sense, like viscerally, it has to be somatic. I can't, I don't know, I need something that's poetic, something that makes me feel as opposed to just like looking at my written list.
- [13:54]
Jessica Ortner
That makes so much sense. And I think that's why there's two DI's that I go back to. Time and time and time and time and time again is our dream life Di. And this summer we launched the Abundant Life Di. And I think I get drawn to them so much because you can swim in the energy and the essence of total freedom, authenticity, magnetism, like living in flow with life. And you get to kind of daydream in that space and there's something about, and not in a spiritual bypass way, like okay, just meditate in the frequency, but it's almost like a connection to your future self in that moment where it feels like your future self is like showing you a glimpse of the feeling, the sensation. And it's not always the exact picture of everything, but it's more so like, wow, I feel so at peace. Sometimes that peace feeling is swinging on a hammock, watching the sunset. You know, sometimes that peace feeling is creating a video or something, but it's really that emotional resonance that connects you to it. And I think part of the neuroplasticity of it all is when you have that anchor, that rootedness of what that, that positive emotion feels like. When you face the tests, when you face the triggers, when you're like, oh, what is this all about? You have an emotional touch point of like this, but this is what I'm getting to. And if I'm not there yet, I know that I, there's still more to go. I like have to put boundaries up or say no. But it's like you're chasing that connection deeper.
- [15:37]
Beth Behrs
And I think too when you're in those DI's and you've practiced feeling it or let your body feel it, then when tests do come up, you're able to like go back in a little bit quicker than maybe if you hadn't been doing it. Even if you know you're not on that hammock yet on the lake or whatever, you know, you're, you're able to feel it. And so it's hard because I would say if you interviewed me again and I was my 27 year old self, I would have given you such specifics, such a long list. I want my house to be this. I Think that also comes. We were talking with being a mother and being almost 40, and I had such drive and hunger in my. My twenties. And I. It's not that I've lost that, but I have to learn surrender. In my 20s, I was mostly chasing out of deep down feeling not enough. I have not felt enough my whole life. It's funny, emdr, I know you guys have talked about this, so a lot of TBM listeners probably do it as well, but it has changed my life because I just had it, like, a couple weeks ago. And there's this feeling one time in middle school, like, it's so stupid, but see, something stupid that happened to you when you're a kid. And then it makes me, like, feel silly telling you this, but there was, like, this moment in middle school where these girls excluded me from something called the Cool Kids Club.
- [16:57]
Jessica Ortner
And I mean, even that in and of itself, the Cool Kids Club.
- [17:01]
Beth Behrs
I know it's like, I laugh now, but when you're in, like, sixth grade, it's like. And I just, you know, I cried in the bathroom, and they wouldn't allow me to sit with them at lunch or talk to them at school or whatever. Right. So, anywho, I've always also felt in Hollywood, like I've been excluded from the Cool Kids Club. And I know that's. So probably a lot of actors who are listening, maybe who want to be, are like, what are you talking about? You've been on TV for, like, so many years and. But I just do. I've never felt enough. Like, I just don't feel. I'm not on the Bear winning an Emmy, you know, But I'm doing what I authentically feel like I was meant to do, which is, like, be a goofball and make people laugh falling down the stairs, you know, like, that's. That's who I am. But we did EMDR around that one experience of the Cool Kids, you know, bullying or whatever, and that feeling of, like, how it came up in my 20s on 2 Broke Girls. And one of the things was, like, I tried so hard to be, like, in that fashion world because I thought I was supposed to, because, you know, it kind of blew up overnight. And that's what all the other girls who were on TV were doing. And it just. I mean, honestly, I felt like stylists were like, oh, this girl has. No, I didn't. I was. I mean, I've wore soccer shorts and cowboy boots like, my whole life. I'm just. It's just. Although you did like my shirt Today, which makes me happy. But I love your shirt today.
- [18:18]
Jessica Ortner
But I just, like.
- [18:19]
Beth Behrs
That was just, you know, I'd rather be playing around with a horse on the set, on the lot, than, like, thinking about trying to get Vogue to, like, feature me in a magazine. But in my 20s, I would have put that on my list and chased it and wanted to be it, because I felt like in order to feel enough, that was something I needed to manifest. And I would have told you back then that I felt that was authentic to who I was. And now it's only now, looking back that I can be like, God, I should have just leaned into cowboy boots back in the day. I should have just, you know, owned who I was. Because there were lots of red carpets and lots of things that, like, I just was so uncomfortable and so not authentically myself. But that's also. I feel like a lot of us would look back now in our 20s. Anyone who's an actress, I feel like, would say the same thing, but 100%.
- [19:09]
Jessica Ortner
I'm so curious, too. I think that is so true for so many people learning who their authentic self is. And I don't know if you've had this experience, but I feel like in my 20s, there was so much questioning of, who am I? Like, someone give me the roadmap. I don't know. It genuinely was frustrating because I was like, I just want someone to tell me, like, fit in this box. Dress like this, be like this. I don't know. I'm confused. And then it wasn't until I stopped looking for everyone else to, like, show me that I started listening. I mean, it really wasn't until I started really doing this work at, like, 26, 27, 28, where I was like, okay, well, what am I actually interested in? What was I interested in as a kid? What do I do when no one's watching? Like, what do I look up online? Those became the hints, the clues to my authentic self. And then now in my 30s, it's so clear. It couldn't be more clear. But it took that permission to disconnect from the shoulds in order to find it.
- [20:17]
Beth Behrs
That's the perfect way of saying it. Disconnecting from the shoulds. And I think it's a. It's a tricky balance, too. Right? And even as women, I feel like we're. And I'm a Capricorn. Are you a Capricorn? I feel like you are. Yeah.
- [20:30]
Jessica Ortner
Okay.
- [20:30]
Beth Behrs
We probably relate on this that we've always been pretty ambitious. Go getters. It almost feels lazy to me to try to surrender to something bigger than myself. Higher power, whatever you want to call it. Because I think there's a really fine line for people in their 20s, 30s, 60s, whatever. You have to do this work to get clear on your authentic code. And, and what you want from a place of authenticity is number one, right? We're not doing it because we want a house in Malibu to show everybody that I'm enough now. It's. It's because I love the ocean and I want to wake up to the smell of the ocean or whatever the. So you're getting clear on that. But then you have to take action. You can't step back. I love Dr. Tara's work for that reason that, you know, she's very much about. And your work, there's very much like action steps. However, at some point, and I'm finding this a lot more in my late 30s than I ever did before, I have to let go and trust. And I think for a Capricorn, the trusting has been my deepest issue. And the emdr, that not enough thing is constant still. Even I've done the work even with emdr, but I think it's just being aware of it and showing up to keep doing the work is maybe the way that there will be more trust. Because you're still unblocking. Even if my list is simple and I pretty badass, know my authentic code, know who I am. It's still showing up. You still have to show up in different ways maybe than you did. I mean, after tubercles, I was doing TBM work every day. And now, I mean, I'll drop into a DI when I need to or I'll go to therapy every week and do emdr. And I feel like that's a very really. They go really well hand in hand. This work and therapy.
- [22:17]
Jessica Ortner
Oh, yes. I mean, you can see the pattern so clearly. And then you can take that in deeper.
- [22:22]
Beth Behrs
Absolutely.
- [22:24]
Jessica Ortner
What was. Okay, younger, you manifested this incredible opportunity at 2 Broke Girls, and then you then manifested this also long term opportunity with the neighborhood. What versions of you were calling in those things? What part of you needed that experience? Like what lessons did you get in each experience? And then how did that evolve to the next one up? Because I'm thinking for people, like, it's also very rare to get booked on two mega shows. So there was clearly strong alignment, self worth on a baseline level. But then there was some other healing patterns that you were navigating with each of the shows.
- [23:10]
Beth Behrs
Yeah, well, it's interesting. Two Broke Girls So, I mean, just to, like, let the audience know, like, I. There is not a time. My mom said, at three years old, I watched the Sound of Music and was like, asking her to be an actor. So in some ways, I feel like I never knew anything else that I wanted to do. The acting thing, I've never questioned. I went to college for it. I went to ucla. I mean, Capricorn. I was like, emailing, calling agents at 14, 15 years old in LA. One of them, I actually. So there's an actress named Kristin Chenoweth, and I had written her agent a letter at 14, like, put it in a manila envelope and send it to her. And I guess I said on the thing, I'm the next Kristin Chenoweth or something like that, mailed it to her, and she agreed to take a meeting with me. So my mom, like, I flew to LA by myself on a weekday to, like, take this meeting. And years later, when I got to Brooke, she told me she was like, I just had never met a girl who had the balls at that young age to be like, I'm this and you need to meet with me. Which then once I got Two Broke Girls, like, all that confidence went out the window, which is so interesting because you would think that that child, like, I did have a lot of acting confidence pre 2 broke girls. And then I got it. And I have to credit my co star on that, Kat Dennings, because without her, she had been in the business for so long. It was instant chemistry, instant friendship. I got so lucky both shows. I've gotten so lucky with the people that I've worked with. I. And. But I was like. I mean, it wasn't overnight success, but it was as close as probably you can get to, like. I mean, I was working seven days a week. I was a nanny during the week, and then on the weekends, I was doing double bartending shifts at a theater called the Geffen. And I went literally one night from that to doing the pilot of 2 Broke Girls. I had done little guest stars and things here and there, but, like, I mean, it literally was. Was almost as overnight as you can get. And I started having panic attacks. I mean, my. I've always been an anxious person, but the. The struggle of two broke girls was the immense amount of pressure on two young women. @ that time, when, remember, Netflix was still DVDs. I mean, 2 Broke Girls came at a time when 20 million people were tuning in. It was such a different. And I went from, like, college girl to, like, I have to, like, on a Network show I have to, like, lead this show with. And so I credit Kat to, like, really holding my hand through. And she's also like, me. Like, we wore sweatpants. Like, we love to read cozy books like little women. Like, you know what I mean? We were just very similar in who we were off camera. Our characters were. Could not be more different on camera. So it was interesting because I feel like I lost a lot of confidence during the years of two bro girls, as opposed to what I had as a child and as a young woman. And then also I learned it was like going to graduate school for comedy. I did work that I am so proud of on that show, and I worked my ass off. I mean, girl, I did not get a period for six years because it was like being like an Olympic athlete or my doctor said crazy and the hours and everything. So it was like my 20s was like, it was my grad school. That was my grad school. But I definitely wouldn't tell you I was a the confident child that I had been about acting. Acting changed for me. It became a really high pressure job. And it was due to panic attacks that I found horses during that run because I would notice when the horse was on set, I was, like, so much happier and I would feel so calm. And so the horses kind of became my passion outside of acting. And then when acting became my job, that was really where I was found. That grounded rootedness in myself and my authenticity away from Hollywood. So that was the. Honestly, thanks to two brokers, because my character had a horse, and I probably never would have experienced equine therapy or now I have three horses. So, yeah, I wouldn't have done that. And then on my manifest list for the neighborhood, I just remember calling in. I wanted this feeling of growing up and doing theater. I did community theater. I did professional theater of, like, a troupe. And like, that theater kid mentality. I just. I can't. I couldn't find my real list. But I know that it was about having sort of this. That theater kid feeling again. And two of the actors on the show I had seen in plays the year before, I got the neighborhood. Like, it was like they were in two plays at the Geffen and one in New York. And it was like, oh, my God, these are my people. When I saw who was cast, when they were asking me to do the show, I was like, oh, my God, I just saw him in the Geffen. Marcel Spears. He was incredible. He's a theater guy. And I wanted something less taxing on my body and my Life that was on my list. And it was, it was a big ensemble. It wasn't the two broke girls. It was like a whole neighborhood. Like there were two families. And yeah, it was everything. I, I wanted to call in at my next job and oh, I wanted a job that I could like get married and have kids on and it would be. And I did like, it was all.
- [28:16]
Jessica Ortner
Wow. Yeah, it's so interesting too because. Okay, so like for anyone listening, thinking about this, I'm also thinking about people who have kids and are parenting. The probably encouragement you got from your mom or your dad or your parents around this acting to give you that baseline confidence that like write a letter, like send the letter, we'll go to the meeting. Like, it sounds like you were instilled that this is possible. I can do this. Of course I'm gonna do this. Whatever. So also listening to your kids pangs and interests and not being like that's ridiculous. Like it's really hard for you out there not feeding them with that fear and limitation and just seeing like plant the seed. Not to push them in any one direction, but plant the seed. And if it comes up, I think that did you an immense amount of subconscious self worth in that department. But then it's interesting. Hearing the intensity of the production was almost the thing that was like, oh my God, I need to get my footing here. Because this is like, this isn't play anymore. This is like a real multi millions of.
- [29:26]
Beth Behrs
Dollars. This is not the backyard theater troupe doing Cinderella. And it changes. And I talk a lot about that with a lot of my girlfriends who are artists. Vocation versus passion and how you sort of remedy when something becomes something that you monetize. Even if it's your heart and soul. You know, you're living what you're supposed to be doing on this earth. But it changes from just doing it for the love of it and doing it because it's your career. Like it's how you make money. And so I think that was for me it was about finding. Because acting had always been that. I mean I didn't go out in high school. I missed so much of high school because I was a singer too. And I would like so nerdy but like I would, would do my vocal warm ups in the morning and then go to these like vocal workshops on the weekends. So like I, I missed a lot of it because I was so committed. That was my whole passion in my life. And then once I actually got my dreams, it shifted a.
- [30:18]
Lacy Phillips
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- [32:10]
Jessica Ortner
Off. And now I'm starting, I'm like okay, the Capricorn, the high achiever, the pressure to perform in that space and the fact that you're the struggle for the surrender. I'm like, okay, this is a high achiever. Probably perfectionist, likes control. Where do you feel like that aspect comes from? I only recognize it because I have that as.
- [32:40]
Beth Behrs
Well. I mean I genuinely do think it all stems from deep down feeling not enough in some way. And so we're constantly chasing as opposed to letting things come. Chasing versus attracting. And yeah, I was a people pleaser. I still, I mean I'm not recovered in that. I'm still terrified to like, I mean even, you know, we had parent teacher conference this morning and I'm like trying to make sure that like the teachers know. I'm like, I'll do whatever we need to make Emma the, you know, it's just like I can't, I'm still working on that piece of myself. But I do think it's hindered me though in the joy a lot of acting in some ways. And I wish I could go back to my 20 year old self because now I'll watch episodes of 2 Girls and see some of the physical comedy and stuff Kat and I did. And I long to go back. It was so much fun in front of that big live audience and yeah, and, and, and I wish I had not been so incredibly focused on being perfect. You know, I wish I had just let go and had fun because on the neighborhood, as I got older I was able to let go and have more fun. And now moving forward like after the neighborhood, I've been doing it for so long that I have just sort of honestly a little bit like the confidence I had in childhood came back in because why is it, why do I feel that way now? I, I, I don't know. Experience and time and.
- [34:05]
Jessica Ortner
Aging. Self.
- [34:06]
Beth Behrs
Expansion. Self expansion?
- [34:08]
Lacy Phillips
Yeah.
- [34:08]
Jessica Ortner
Yeah. I mean when you, I imagine your volume of reps at it are.
- [34:14]
Beth Behrs
So high that you're like, it would.
- [34:17]
Jessica Ortner
Be unreasonable for me to doubt my abilities in my acting at this.
- [34:21]
Beth Behrs
Point. You know, I mean we'll see. I've also been so on the same show for eight years so like, like obviously it's going to be new to like, I mean the last audition I had was a very high stress audition in person for the Wicked movie which I literally was like my dream too. I would have loved but Ariana Grande killed it. But like, yeah, it's even been a while since I've had time to be up for like new things. So it'll be interesting to see if this like confidence I feel right now transfers. I might be doing a lot of DI's before auditions in the.
- [34:52]
Jessica Ortner
Next. A lot of self expansion. Just like I did this before, I can do.
- [34:56]
Beth Behrs
This. I think I still know how to do this. I can do this. Yeah, because you're right, it is the hours. If you're doing it all day. Right. It's a 10,000 hours thing. Right. It's like now I've surpassed that. So yeah, television is pretty. I think I got.
- [35:09]
Jessica Ortner
It. It's so interesting because we're crafting the end of year challenge. It's going to be about inner child.
- [35:15]
Beth Behrs
Stages. Oh.
- [35:16]
Jessica Ortner
Awesome. And going through each of them. Not the heavy lifting but full nurturance. What did I love here? Like somatically, what did I need? You know, did I need more physical touch Any more eye contact, any more comfort? Did I need to be told? Xyz, like, just giving your inner child everything and then doing IRL practices for each phase. So for the infancy phase, build.
- [35:44]
Lacy Phillips
A pillow for it and cocoon under.
- [35:45]
Jessica Ortner
Your blankets, take a womb bath, stuff like that. So in doing that, you're reclaiming an authentic aspect of your inner child that you haven't let integrate. And so my theory is right now, because I think so many people are just craving the magic, the play, the surrender, the trust, the ease. It feels very heightened right now. People are wanting to put their holiday decorations out early. You know, like, they're just. Just so much of this joy that we're craving. And I think part of it is at some point, we learn to disconnect from it because we learned we couldn't do that to be an adult. We couldn't do that to be safe. We couldn't get our needs met if that part was there. But I think in order to navigate and metabolize everything going on in the world, we have to bring those dormant archetypes back up. We have to bring back the play. We have to bring back the joy. Like, that will be our medicine through. And so I'm so curious how this is gonna play out for you into this next role. And just I'm like, there's no doubt in my mind that you're gonna be on that next set whenever that next role manifests. And you're like, I feel like I'm playing again, full stop. It's like, oh, of course. That happened to. That happened to. That happened to. Yes, there we go. Like, I can just. Just see it in that.
- [37:10]
Beth Behrs
Trajectory. That's so interesting you said that about the joy and the inner child and all of that, because I do feel like there's this collective feeling of wanting to, like, color or go back to play. Like, everyone in my life is. Is feeling that. And even the, like, going back to, like, getting off our phones. And, like, my girlfriends have been playing mahjong. Like, we all learn and, like, mostly because it's like an excuse on a Sunday afternoon to be off our phones and play a game together and talk. We can talk through it. But there does seem to be this sort of, like, back to games. Back to, we want our Christmas decorate the joy. And. And I think that has a lot to do with also, like, from COVID to, like, there's just been a lot that we've all been through as a collective society recently, but giving ourselves permission. When you said that about being on set. And I hope you can find the joy. My thought was, I hope I can let go enough, because in order to find that joy. And by the way, that's what my expander, Olivia Coleman, she is visceral. You never see her trying to work at it. Like, she is fully joyful, living in the moment in every role, whether it's comedy, whether it's drama, whether it's tv, whether it's like. So it's interesting because as you said that I was like, that's exactly what she does. That's what I'm drawn to, is there's this sense of play in her. Even if it's a really serious. There's an ease to it. And in order to do that, you really do have to believe that you're enough. A. Because that is like how you can let go and trust. No matter what you're doing, letting go and trusting yourself. Isn't that what we're all doing this work to try to get to. At the end of the day.
- [38:51]
Jessica Ortner
It'S the scariest thing, because especially if you identify with someone who likes to control things or likes to handle things, or feels like the good student, or feels like, I can work with this, there is a safety and protection shell that is built up so strong that letting go feels like death. It feels like I will not survive if I don't make sure all the things go out on time. And this isn't handled in this way. Like, nothing will function if I don't do that. And for anyone else out there who maybe they don't identify with this exact example, think about what their version of that is like. What's your version of control? Where it's like, oh, if I do that, it feels like death. It feels like I'm giving up a part of.
- [39:42]
Lacy Phillips
Myself. It's your exact.
- [39:44]
Jessica Ortner
Medicine. Of course, you're going to be humbled by the universe with immense need to surrender when the whole scaffolding has been the opposite. You know, it's divine and a cosmic laugh that is not so fun all the.
- [40:01]
Beth Behrs
Time. And I think it also too, like, once you're really in tune with that authenticity, the. That whole. I feel like it's so much pressure when people say, like, what's your purpose? Like, what are you meant to do on this earth? I'm like, dear God, calm.
- [40:16]
Jessica Ortner
Down.
- [40:17]
Beth Behrs
Let's. Okay, first of all, like, just being like a mother of a child or an active part of your community, that's good enough. That's a good.
- [40:26]
Jessica Ortner
Purpose. Like, I hate.
- [40:28]
Beth Behrs
That. And I feel like, it's. With social media. Do you feel like it's been more in your face to feel like you have to, like, figure out what your life purpose is? Or maybe that's just my algorithm, but I've been thinking about that recently, and I'm like. Like, I am all for striving for whatever you want to be in this life or do, but it's also, like, sometimes I think that makes us forget that, like, life is also these ordinary little moments of joy hits or of things that come.
- [40:58]
Jessica Ortner
Together.
- [40:59]
Beth Behrs
Yes. Do I believe that, like, making people laugh is probably why I'm here, and, like, that helps people during hard times, and, like, that's how I'm going to serve and that's. Is that in some way my purpose? Yes, but also, like. Like, my purpose is to, like, support my child, to find her joy. Like, what you were saying about, like, what my parents or, you know, and my purpose is to, like, I have a neighbor who's sick and I'm gonna go, like, make cookies tonight and like. Or whatever, you know, it's. I don't know. I just also feel like sometimes we're getting inundated with these messages that make us forget that, like, the ordinary can be holy. And to make the ordinary holy just grows your joy. You can get when those bigger manifestations or whatever you want to call it, come through or bigger life things, because you're able to live day to day from a place of that joy and not wait because you're not living your purpose.
- [41:48]
Jessica Ortner
Yet. I love that you brought this up. This is something we actually talked about on tour of, like, redefining purpose. Purpose is so this, like, you're stamped with this. This is your contribution, and that's it. And it's fixed. And you find it or you don't. And what does that mean? It kind of feel scary.
- [42:09]
Beth Behrs
Yeah. It's so overwhelming. And I feel like we. We get fed it a lot. Like, we'll find your.
- [42:14]
Jessica Ortner
Purpose. Yeah, Find your purpose. And so much is. It's connected to career or success or.
- [42:20]
Beth Behrs
Achievement. And money. Money. Huge piece of it.
- [42:23]
Jessica Ortner
Y. And I think if we can reframe purpose to be how we express our authenticity from moment to moment in this season and then redefine it per season will feel a lot more fulfilled and a lot more connected. Because the thing that purpose does give us is that feeling. That. And in going through the inner child stages, I think it's the preschool phase is when they start to adopt this sense that, oh, when I do this, this. It has A positive impact on this or my, my showing up. My contribution means something and that feels important and, and dutiful and not in a place of like you have to do this, but more like, wow, I feel connected to others when I make this contribution. And so I think making purpose, this like singular thing that we do is very minimizing to all the gifts that people have, all the authentic expressions. And so if we can kind of reframe purpose to be like, there's some way of expressing our energy, our essence, our authenticity on a day to day basis in the little moments. And if we can get clear on that, that is the energy that is having you make cookies for your neighbor. That is the energy that is having you connect with your child and parent. That is the energy that's going to set and is like, okay, cool, what are we doing today? It, it's all. That is all purpose. And so I think if people can get clear on wow. When I'm expressing authentically, like I am dancing with that purpose, that is I think, way better of a thing to strive for than just a fixed.
- [44:10]
Beth Behrs
Title. And I've always loved, especially as an overachiever and to all the overachievers out there, listen to Jessica and Lacy when they tell you on the how to manifest the six to nine months. Because it's especially like I remember before too broke because I was like sharing a one bedroom and apartment with a friend and like, you know, I had no money and I had, I had $10,000 written on a dollar bill because I had read like the Secret or something where it said like write on it what you want or whatever. But I feel like that's always something I've really loved that helps my overachiever self in your work calm down and get more joyful in those moments and pieces is that feeling of like, what is realistic in six months that I can work towards day to.
- [44:55]
Jessica Ortner
Day.
- [44:56]
Beth Behrs
That's. It's pieces. Even if it's like, I mean, I think you guys still call them like fragment expanders and things where you're finding. Lacy's always been super helpful for me, especially with like when I had wanted to manifest a house and I was. It didn't happen for four years and it was constant little fragment things that. But the six to nine months thing, I'd be like, okay, I just want to pick a name, neighborhood. I want to find authentically the neighborhood. I might not have the money yet, I might not, but like, at least I can start getting. But it's the, the little micro Things that then it might take time, but then does lead to the big things. And if you can find that joy that you were saying in those six to nine month goals too, then when you do manifest in a year or whatever, your biggest goals, it's. It's so you haven't missed. The process is rich and joyful and you haven't missed.
- [45:48]
Lacy Phillips
Anything. If you are walking into this season feeling burnt out, overwhelmed, exhausted, tested, triggered in love, money, career, relationships, all of the things or maybe just searching for clarity, you are not alone. It has been a massive year of endings, ego deaths and transformation cycles. And when that happens, it's always your inner child, your safety, your self worth, your nervous system that takes the hit. Most people don't realize this, but your inner child is actually the one who is quietly running the show. Your triggers, your relationship patterns, your blocks, the decisions you make, even the level of success you'll allow yourself to have all root down to whether your inner child feels safe. That is exactly why we created this end of year challenge as the Return to magic challenge. A 15 day manifestation challenge guiding you to reparent your inner child, reconnect with your magic and step into this new year as your most confident, regulated magnetic self. This is how you will come home to yourself this season. Reconnecting with your authenticity, grounding your nervous system and truly understanding the patterns that are running the show that need to reparent in order to order to feel safe with all of the changes happening to us. You can access this challenge inside of our pathway membership. If you are up for renewals, be sure to check out your renewal email or if you are getting the ping to join to be magnetic. Now is the perfect time because we have our big end of year sale going on where you can get 30% off your entire membership of the pathway. So that means not only are you going to get this challenge, but you're going to get every single TBM workshop including how to manifest inner child shadow, love, money, boundaries, rut, rock bottom. Plus our entire library of deep imaginings, our science backed self hypnosis that are formulated with emdr, somatic healing parts work and neuroscience tools to help you regulate your nervous system and reprogram your subconscious so you can actually create the life you want. If you've been feeling stuck, overwhelmed or ready for a total reset, this is your moment. This is the portal. Return to your magic. You will walk away with a step by step re parenting guide that's actually going to change your reality from the inside out. This is the year you're going to feel more grounded, clear, confident, and back to your magnetic self again. Again. You can join us in the pathway with our 30% off sale at to bemagnetic.com let's begin your journey.
- [48:37]
Jessica Ortner
Today. Okay, wait. Talk about the home manifestation and the four years and the surrender in that. When you first wrote your list for the home, were you hoping it would come through in that first.
- [49:00]
Beth Behrs
Year? Yeah, well, because, I mean, I still had roommates and I mean, I was 24 when I got two broke girls. And I mean, literally it was like having $400 as my. All of my. In my bank account overnight to like, I finally had, you know, some savings and things. But I still had a roommate for the first three seasons of 2 Broke Girls until my husband and I, who's now my husband, who's my boyfriend at the time, moved in.
- [49:28]
Jessica Ortner
Together.
- [49:28]
Beth Behrs
But. But I really felt like I was ready, quote in quotes, for that house. But in a lot of ways I was not authentic in really what I needed out of a home. I feel like I was looking towards what my co stars had. Like, well, I should have this kind of house in this area because that's what this actress has and this actress has and I know them and like that's what they're doing or whatever. And so, so things would fall through. Like the universe really took care of me in the sense of like, it didn't happen till it was meant to happen. And the house I ended up manifesting and having I saw on Zillow multiple times, but didn't come see it for months before because it didn't have the number of bedrooms I wanted. Like it was one under the bedrooms I wanted to. But finally there was some sort of expansion that happened. I remember this weirdly. On a hike at Freiman, I saw a for sale sign on something and I looked it up and it said they had a adu. And I was like, oh, that's a way you can get another bedroom. Like if I want my parents to be able to come visit. Oh, so maybe I just need to find a property that also would have the capability someday to build the ADU or.
- [50:44]
Jessica Ortner
Whatever. And.
- [50:45]
Beth Behrs
That'S. And then I gave this one, this house that I'm in now, like another chance. So. But it didn't. I mean, I was looking in all different neighborhoods. I then after two brothers, I was like, maybe I'll just stay where I'm at and buy a farm in upstate New York. But then it was like, well then you're never gonna go like, you're never gonna have time. You're, like, working in la. So, like, I had all sorts of jumping all around, but Lacey was really helpful for me during that time with just holding space for me, asking questions about, do you.
- [51:16]
Lacy Phillips
Think? Is.
- [51:16]
Beth Behrs
This. Am I doing this right? Am I trying to manifest? But it all worked out. But I think it's about waiting and.
- [51:22]
Jessica Ortner
Trusting. What do you think were some of the things that allowed you to get closer to it? What were some of the things that you had to drop off? Like, the bedroom expansion is huge. Detaching from it being so specific to. Well, the need is that the core need, the bedroom, is not really about the number. It's. I want space for parents to come, for kids, for this, for that. Okay, how could we get the need for that space met? So thinking outside the box, I think on those things. But then what were some of the things that this house authentically gave you that had you gotten what your co stars had, maybe wouldn't have given.
- [52:01]
Beth Behrs
You? I think. And I actually talk about this a lot with my husband, too, of, like. And I'm sure we all. Everyone listening can do it, but you know, when you kind of have fantasy ideas, like, I just said this the other day. You'll think this is funny. But I said, like, I follow this really cool horse girl who's, like, a conservationist in Africa, and she, like, rides horses on safari with, like, elephants and whatever, and then she, like, studies them. And I'm like, God, like, I'm just gonna go to Africa and, like, do that. And then my girlfriend was like, they don't have Uber eats in Africa. And you. You're not gonna be okay in that. He. Whatever. But I feel like there was a part of me, like, maybe I'm gonna live in, like, Topanga, and I'm gonna commute. I'm gonna have this super epic nature property. But I hate. I hate, like, feeling really isolated deep down, I hated that. But I thought, but that's. That's what someone else has that makes them really happy, and they love that neighborhood, and maybe I'll find that's where my people are, and I'm gonna. Then I thought about, oh, my God, I'm commuting five days a week to the Valley. I can't. Like, that's a real. And people do it. I did have co stars who were doing it, and, you know, so I still. I think that's, like, something I have a fault of. Of, like, not necessarily, like, wanting something someone else has, but thinking, oh, that's a really cool person and I really love them and they have that. Maybe that's. That's what I should do. But then you're not going internally and feeling what's best for you. You're relying on what brings someone else joy to think that that's gonna make you happy. And so it was. It was sort of tests and things like that. Even aesthetically, I've always wanted just a very super traditional east coast looking father of the bride, that kind of thing. But I was like, no, maybe I want like mid century modern, like architectural di. But it's like, no, that's actually not what I want at all. But it took me time and then a lot was out of our budget at that time. And so it's like, okay, are you gonna. What's worth it to like, risk and spend over or not? And then we waited and had we not waited? And it. It was literally what happens. There's tests and there's things that happen. And you wait and you think, oh, my God, I'm gonna put an offer in. And then someone puts an offer in and it's gone. You're like, that was supposed to be my house. It wasn't. An actor's really good at this because we have so much rejection of, like, things of like that part, you know, that part was meant for Ariana Grande and she killed it. That was not meant for me. And you have to, I think, do that with your manifestations a little bit too. Of like, yep, it's not this apartment or whatever you're trying to manifest, but that's because mine is. It's coming. That's trust too, and that's hard, and that's.
- [54:35]
Jessica Ortner
Surrender. Yeah. I think that's such a good mindset to have with it too, where it's like you can appreciate the house or the role or the thing that someone else got and be like, wow, that was really nice. But I know my thing that's going to nurture me better than that could have ever done is out there for.
- [54:55]
Lacy Phillips
Me. It will not miss.
- [54:56]
Beth Behrs
Me. Yeah. Because it's meant for.
- [54:58]
Jessica Ortner
You. I love even the details of sharing the. Okay, well, maybe it's supposed to be out in Topanga. I also had Topanga.
- [55:07]
Beth Behrs
Fantasies. Don't we.
- [55:08]
Jessica Ortner
All? I was like, it's so stunning out here and remote and like the mountains and the smell. It's like so good. And then I stayed at a friend's place, like, did a weekend. Let me stay at the place for a weekend. And you're like, oh, wow, like These are some, like, windy roads. Like, winding in and out is like, quite a hike. And I think for some people, authentically, like the windy roads out in nature, having the removal is the medicine. And it did make me realize in that moment I was like, I need to be way closer to a coffee shop. Like, I need to be closer to a food store. Like, there's something that feels. Maybe it's because I grew up in the suburbs that there's something that feels very nourishing to be able to, like, get in your car and, like, be at a store in a couple of minutes. There's something that feels very laborious about it taking so long to get there. But that's just my authentic makeup. And I wouldn't know that had I not tested out. Living in the area for the weekend. Even though I love staying there, I love booking Airbnbs there. But the day to day wasn't practical for, like, authentically what I need.
- [56:17]
Beth Behrs
Need. Have you ever. Out of fear. So my husband and I do talk a lot and I've actually, like, I've talked to Lacey a lot about this, but, like, there might be a day someday where him and I decide to move out of la. But the fear, My therapist is like, yeah, but you, you deep down think that being in nature is best for your soul and your life and your daughter's life. Moving forward in the future, however, like, like, are you gonna let that fear of isolation rural? Although, like, what if I. There's a snowstorm and she has to go to the doctor and I can't get out because it's not, you know, stuff. It's like. But I'm like, when does it come into, like, well, that's just not my authenticity. Or when is it? Like, no, you're. You don't trust yourself enough and you don't trust your own resilience enough. And I guess those are the big manifestation leaps, right? Like, and I'm just maybe not ready to do that yet. But I do sometimes notice with myself, how much do I do out of safety? And how much could I gain in my life if I chose love over fear a little bit more and trusted my resilience and not this house that I have now that I've manifested. But in the future, if we ever did leave la, like, I have so much fear about that. Even if it might be what's best for, like, my husband and my daughter and my.
- [57:31]
Jessica Ortner
Family. I. I think you're spot on there. I think it's a mixed bag. So on one hand, you could take the leap before you're ready. But I also feel like it will be so obvious when you need that leap and when you're resourced enough and feeling safe enough to take that leap. So it's so parallel. It's so interesting. I, me and my fiance also talk about this. We're like, can't really imagine, like raising kids in LA forever. And I always have this cul de sac that doesn't have sidewalks, like somewhere with mountains. Like, I don't know where this place.
- [58:08]
Lacy Phillips
Exists.
- [58:09]
Jessica Ortner
Exists. I have no idea. But like, I've always had this vision in the back of my head and I'm like, oh God. I, like, don't want to leave LA because I love so much about it. I know, but there's this vision there. My guess is that at some point this will not feel as good anymore. And it's kind of like Lacy says, like bridges, they're, they're medicinal until you're at them too long and then it starts to become poisonous. So I think if it's, you're staying here because you're still in the comfort, you're not stepping through the fear and seeing your resilient, this will not feel as good. And if it is still feeling good and lighting you up and you're like, yes, yes, yes. I wouldn't be like, well, now I have to move to the country because that was what I supposed to do. Like, maybe don't take that leap yet until you're getting that full signal from your body of like, like, wow, okay, I've. I've overstayed my welcome in this. I'm ready to go. And that's not to say the fear is going to be.
- [59:07]
Beth Behrs
Gone.
- [59:08]
Jessica Ortner
Right? But it'll be.
- [59:09]
Beth Behrs
Clear. And that worst case scenario, di. I've used that a lot for things like that. Because look, we live in very privileged worst case scenarios compared to many people around the world. So I know that doesn't work all the time. However, for most things, if we can believe through those, sort of running that through our nervous system and going like, I, I will be okay because I have my community. I mean, that's really the main thing, isn't it? Having people that will support you through things. It's like once you just realize the worst case scenario, oh, I didn't get that job, or I didn't get that, but I'm, I'm okay. I have someone I can call or I have food on the table, or I have my dog or, And I guess that goes back to gratitude too. But I really like that Di. I've used that a lot, lot for when I feel fear like.
- [59:57]
Jessica Ortner
That. It is the easiest way to break the fear and to detach from the outcome. Like, you want to surrender, process the worst case scenario. You will surrender significantly.
- [60:09]
Beth Behrs
Faster. Yeah. Yeah, Exactly. Yeah, it's true.
- [60:13]
Jessica Ortner
Yeah. So good. Okay. I know people are going to kick me if I don't ask this question because we have so many actors in the community, so many artists. What advice would you give someone who feels like they have just been trying and trying and trying and aren't breaking through in the way that they want with their.
- [60:34]
Beth Behrs
Career? A few things. So it's even easier now because of our iPhones. But what my agent sent that the 2 Broke Girls producers saw, because I didn't have tape, really, at that time of like. Like work, that I was, like, super, that I had been on some great series or something to show them. But my friend and I started writing our own comedy sketches and filming them ourselves. And they told me after the fact, after I'd had the part and stuff, that it was that sketch that we did that they showed Cap Dennings, that they showed that were like, now this girl, like, she has something we think, like, she's funny. Because I didn't have any, like, real. I had done, like, a couple small, little two lines on csi, this or whatever, but nothing. And so my first advice would be to make your own content and whatever that looks like authentically for you. For me, it was comedy sketches, and I had a really good friend and we helped each other. And I have to say, like, after being in this business a long time and it's changing a lot, it's not the same as it was at the beginning of Two Brokers or the Neighborhood eight years later. There are a lot of changes, as we know. There were strikes in AI and there's a lot of overhaul happening. So I don't know what the future for any artist really is in this Hollywood context anymore. But I think it's so important to have something that lights you up in your life. And if that's acting great, then get together with your friends. I just heard about this great theater company in LA where they do plays in the backyard. But it's like, they're really good actors, and they put on, like, Hamlet. And so if acting is what lights you up, act, act. Put on plays in your backyard, not because you want to get a TV show, but because it brings you so much joy. And I know that's hard when people are Struggling and maybe they're waitressing seven times a week to make ends meet. That's really difficult to do. So I say that not lightly, but I would be. My main advice, other than make your own opportunities is just find joy in your life aside from the casting director giving you a yes or a no on your audition. Because when I found horses, my whole life changed with this business, truly, in a way that was so magical and that had nothing to do with acting, but it informs my acting more than anything else in I've ever studied or gone to class or.
- [63:03]
Jessica Ortner
Yeah. Do you think having that like you could call horses sort of your authentic hobby, Authentic passion? Right. Do you think having something that wasn't tied to monetary was just you for you and the joy of it allowed almost like more confidence and ease in when you approached.
- [63:28]
Beth Behrs
Acting? That's really very true. Like, that's a very. That's. I really resonate with that. Yeah. And I think there's also something about horses where you're just. You. You're forced to be in the present moment. They are massive, massive prey animals and they do not respond to inauthenticity. You will not get them to connect with you or to be safe with you if they feel fear. When you're. If you're fearful and you're trying to pretend like you're not these. They can sense a wolf a hundred yards away. Like you're. If you're showing up and being like, I'm not scared, and you're like freaking outside, they're gonna know. So I think there's something too. Just about. I'm not saying everyone should go like grab a horse, but. But there is something too that. The hobby I chose was also just forcing me to be so in the present in my body. But there's other hobbies. There's painting that does that, there's guitar. Find what it is for you. But finding something like that. And I find horses very creative too. Even though it's not acting, there is something really creative to me. So I would say yeah. Finding something like that is just super important for your heart. And just in this world like we were talking about, joy is important. We can't always be striving and manifesting and trying. You have to let yourself find joy in the ordinary day to day in some way as.
- [64:46]
Lacy Phillips
Well. A thousand.
- [64:48]
Beth Behrs
Percent. It's.
- [64:49]
Jessica Ortner
Hard. It's hard. I know, but it's. It's those little pockets and I think the permission to play, the permission to allow yourself joy even. Even if you don't have everything buttoned up, even if you're still struggling to figure out how you're gonna make money. I mean, one of the worst traps for people when they're at that place where they're trying to make more money is they only focus on how to make more money. And when you only focus on that, the stakes of it become higher. And then there's this cycle that is like, you cannot surrender, you cannot relax. And so one thing that can be so helpful is finding another outlet, another hobby, something that does light you up so you can remember, okay, maybe.
- [65:33]
Lacy Phillips
Financially I'm not super abundant, but in.
- [65:36]
Jessica Ortner
This hobby, in this experience, I feel so abundant. I feel so alive, I feel so lit up. And use that energy, then bring it back to when you're thinking about manifesting money. So I think it all just, it all gives to each other and.
- [65:52]
Beth Behrs
Finding your community and your people. I mean, you guys at TBM do such a beautiful job of fostering community. I think that's so important. And. And there's so many things that don't cost money. Like I just saw some article about going and listening to your own audiobook to walk along the beach, but you do it with this like, big audio book group. And then everybody has like coffee after. I was like, wow. Like, and you don't have to all listen to the same book, but.
- [66:17]
Jessica Ortner
If you love books, it's kind of like a book.
- [66:19]
Beth Behrs
Club. But it was like a book walking club. I was like, God, that's so. Cause I just remember when I was paycheck to paycheck, like, you, you don't have money to go like do workout classes sometimes with a community or. But there are. If running, there's run clubs or there's things that you can find with your people. Because I do think we're always too addicted to the screen. And that's just our society. It is what we are. But when we come back together and you're like face to face with people, that's an escape from the grind. And the hustle too, is just being with people face to face, like having real interactions with human beings.
- [66:54]
Jessica Ortner
Things. Yes, it's so.
- [66:57]
Beth Behrs
Important. So especially if you're on the grind, if you're on that hamster wheel grind, finding those, those connections outside of that is so hard. And everybody who's on that grind, like I was you, it can happen. I'm your expander. I was sharing a one bedroom. I have $400 in my bank account, like, which is a lot at the time. My rent was like 600. So like I was almost there to my rent, but I don't know, I just always. It's like, what? You're right. My parents were both teachers. Like, I don't come from an acting family at all. And they were both in education and like they had no idea what Hollywood. But you're right. They really never made me feel like I, I couldn't live out my dream, which I'm now I'm realizing, like, thanks mom and dad. Like, I was so lucky to have that and I really hope to do that with my daughter, Emma George, to like really cultivate that. Because you're right. Like, that was something I was very lucky to have. So I'm trying to be that person for everyone listening. Like, you can have whatever you want. It's out there. It'll find you. Just hold on to those joyful micro.
- [67:58]
Jessica Ortner
Moments. Yes. I love it. And if you didn't get that in childhood, like, that's what the reprogramming tools are all about. That is how you give it to yourself. Now, listening to stories like Beth's is exactly what's going to make you like, wow, okay. I'm seeing to believe I'm reprogramming. I'm healing my inner child. And then you'll start to.
- [68:15]
Beth Behrs
Change.
- [68:16]
Jessica Ortner
Totally. Oh, so good. Thank you so much, Beth. Where can everyone find you, connect with you? All of the things at Beth.
- [68:23]
Beth Behrs
Bears on Instagram and TikTok. Not as active on Tik Tok. I'm trying, but I'm also like that 40 year old who's like, I mean, I'm trying but you know, I, I like to do comedy stuff on there, but mostly Instagram. Yeah. And watch. You can watch the neighborhood for a couple more months on CBS at 8 o' clock on Monday nights. Then. Then you'll have to find it on the Internet.
- [68:42]
Jessica Ortner
Somewhere. I love it. Thank you so.
- [68:46]
Beth Behrs
Much. Thanks.
- [68:47]
Lacy Phillips
J. I hope you guys enjoyed that episode with.
- [68:56]
Jessica Ortner
Beth. It was just Chef's.
- [68:58]
Lacy Phillips
Kiss. She has the best energy. So grounding to talk to, so refreshing, so authentic and heartfelt and heart led. If you guys are thinking of deep imaginings that you can start to do to connect to your authenticity. Of course I'm going to recommend the Return to Magic challenge because we go through brand new di's for every single phase, including a magnetic family and home. A purpose, deep imagining to connect to your purpose in the season of life. And then going through trust and safety, autonomy and boundaries, creativity and play for any of the artists, actors, entertainers.
- [69:35]
Jessica Ortner
Musicians, anyone in the creative.
- [69:37]
Lacy Phillips
Field. If you're getting in a creative rut, that creative play. Di Chef's kid this, and then the competency and confidence Di. And then in the following week, we're going to have the authentic identity and belonging. So much magic to.
- [69:51]
Jessica Ortner
Come. And if you want to just do any of the DI's by themselves.
- [69:54]
Lacy Phillips
You can check them out in the daily practice library. We have a little playlist with all of them. Okay, we'll see you next.