Fashion Neurosis with HAIM

Summary

Podcast Summary: Fashion Neurosis with Bella Freud – Episode Featuring HAIM

Podcast Information:

• Title: Fashion Neurosis with Bella Freud
• Host: Bella Freud
• Episode: Fashion Neurosis with HAIM
• Release Date: June 17, 2025
• Guests: Danielle Haim and Alana Haim of the band HAIM

---

Introduction

In this engaging episode of Fashion Neurosis, Bella Freud welcomes Danielle and Alana Haim, the vibrant sisters behind the acclaimed band HAIM. As the eldest, Bella sets a warm, intimate tone for the conversation, inviting the sisters to 'lie on the couch' and delve deep into the interplay between fashion, identity, and personal experiences.

---

Fashion Choices and Personal Style

Bella initiates the discussion by asking Danielle and Alana about their outfits for the episode, setting the stage for a broader conversation on how clothing reflects personal identity.

• Danielle Haim (01:30):
  "I'm wearing a Jenny Fax skirt with a fun little black underwear detail. It's actually printed on the skirt. I just thought it would be funny to wear. I usually don't wear skirts. I'm more of a, you know, pants or tailored kind of girl."

• Alana Haim (02:50):
  "I'm wearing a vintage helmet laying dress and a Callaghan jacket that was designed by Nicolas Ghosquier. I think this is from the year 2000."

The sisters discuss their admiration for designers like Nicolas Ghosquier and their love for vintage and unique pieces, emphasizing how fashion allows them to express individuality and creativity.

---

Sibling Dynamics and Family Influence

Bella explores the dynamics between the sisters, focusing on their roles within the family and how it influences their collaborative work in the band.

• Alana Haim (03:55):
  "I'm a follower. I've been a follower my whole life."

• Danielle Haim (04:23):
  "Esti's always been the tastemaker when it comes to finding and discovering music. And I think Alana and I have always just followed Esti's amazing music taste."

Bella reflects on how, despite differing aesthetics, the sisters maintain a harmonious relationship, each bringing unique strengths to their collaboration.

---

Formative Years and Developing Aesthetic Identities

The conversation shifts to their childhood experiences with fashion, thrift shopping, and early influences that shaped their style.

• Danielle Haim (05:04):
  "I looked at my girlfriends for fashion advice and then also just magazines. But there were some disasters, I really."

• Alana Haim (05:47):
  "I spent my whole childhood stealing what was in your guys' closets. That was my."

They reminisce about their early days of experimenting with clothing, including DIY projects like altering jeans to mimic fashion trends inspired by icons such as Kate Moss.

• Danielle Haim (12:40):
  "We took a needle and thread, we turned the jeans inside out and just from the knee down, hemmed them. It never really worked."

Bella emphasizes the importance of these formative "fashion disasters" as essential steps in discovering their authentic styles.

---

Influences and Inspirations in Fashion

The sisters discuss their deep admiration for fashion designers and icons, highlighting key inspirations that have influenced their personal and professional aesthetics.

• Danielle Haim (22:25):
  "I was obsessed with that pattern. I started really trying to understand what the fashion world was."

• Alana Haim (22:18):
  "Phoebe Philo. We are all obsessed with Phoebe Philo."

They delve into their passion for designers like Phoebe Philo and brands like Chloé and Balenciaga, sharing stories of significant fashion moments that left a lasting impact.

• Danielle Haim (25:12):
  "We woke up early. We figured out somehow when it was the 95% off day, and I got all my money from my birthday, and I found a Chloe top."

Bella appreciates how these influences transcend mere clothing choices, shaping their identities and creative expressions.

---

Confidence, Personal Growth, and Overcoming Insecurities

Bella steers the conversation towards personal growth, discussing the transition from adolescence to adulthood and the challenges that come with it.

• Danielle Haim (19:01):
  "When I really found my stride, I think I was well into my 20s, and I think I'm maybe just sort of hitting my stride now."

The sisters openly discuss their struggles with confidence, anxiety, and the journey to self-acceptance, highlighting the role of fashion and music as therapeutic outlets.

• Danielle Haim (28:31):
  "I have an insecure attachment style, but I'm working on it."

Bella connects these personal insights to broader themes of identity and emotional well-being, underscoring the podcast's focus on the unspoken language of clothing.

---

Music, Influences, and the Intersection with Fashion

HAIM shares their musical journey, discussing how music and fashion are intertwined aspects of their identities.

• Danielle Haim (10:06):
  "We loved all of the kind of uniform with the boy bands and you know, the Spice Girls for us, even though we were in the states, were huge."

They reflect on the impact of musical influences from the early 2000s, such as The Strokes, and how these shaped both their sound and style.

Bella appreciates the symbiotic relationship between music and fashion, recognizing how each influences their expressions and experiences.

---

Working with Paul Thomas Anderson

A significant highlight of the episode is HAIM's collaboration with famed director Paul Thomas Anderson, discussing how his vision has captured their essence.

• Alana Haim (46:06):
  "He captured the essence of all of us so effortlessly and it makes me emotional because I love Paul."

• Danielle Haim (50:42):
  "Our first project we ever did was this short film that we made called Valentine. It was an honor."

The sisters share heartfelt anecdotes about their first interactions with Anderson, the creative synergy they experienced, and the profound impact of his work on their artistic journey.

---

Emotional Well-being and Coping Mechanisms

The discussion turns to emotional health, exploring how the sisters support each other and manage anxieties within their tight-knit relationship.

• Danielle Haim (53:03):
  "I would recognize it afterwards where I would kind of be anxious about something... I think we've spent our entire lives together."

Bella relates these experiences to broader psychological themes, emphasizing the challenges of balancing individual emotions within familial bonds.

• Alana Haim (28:31):
  "I think I'm avoidant. I like to run through life just hoping that everything's gonna be okay."

The sisters candidly discuss their attachment styles, strategies for emotional regulation, and the importance of seeking external support like therapy.

---

Relationships and Personal Interactions

HAIM delves into the complexities of romantic relationships and how personal style influences attraction and connection.

• Danielle Haim (43:13):
  "I like men that dress a little casual but that know how to dress up and dress well when they need to be buttoned up."

• Alana Haim (42:10):
  "I felt like I was dating a stranger and not in a good way."

They share humorous and relatable stories about dating and the role of attire in first impressions, highlighting the delicate balance between personal preferences and emotional connections.

---

Closing Remarks

Bella wraps up the conversation by reflecting on HAIM's journey, their bond as sisters, and the therapeutic power of music and fashion. The sisters express gratitude for the platform, acknowledging Bella's role in facilitating such meaningful discussions.

• Danielle Haim (60:07):
  "It's my honor too. Thank you so much."

The episode concludes on a heartfelt note, celebrating the intersection of fashion, music, and personal identity.

---

Notable Quotes

• Danielle Haim (01:30):
  "I'm wearing a Jenny Fax skirt with a fun little black underwear detail. It's actually printed on the skirt."

• Alana Haim (22:25):
  "Phoebe Philo. We are all obsessed with Phoebe Philo."

• Danielle Haim (19:01):
  "I think I'm just sort of hitting my stride now."

• Alana Haim (46:06):
  "He captured the essence of all of us so effortlessly and it makes me emotional because I love Paul."

---

Conclusion

This episode of Fashion Neurosis masterfully intertwines discussions of fashion, family, music, and personal growth. Through candid conversations and heartfelt anecdotes, Danielle and Alana Haim offer listeners a profound exploration of how clothing serves as a reflection of inner identities and experiences. Bella Freud skillfully navigates these themes, creating a rich and engaging narrative that resonates with both fashion enthusiasts and those seeking deeper understanding of personal and familial dynamics.

Transcript

[Este Haim]

This is the way it feels to move through summer in Lululemon iconic aligned.

[Alana Haim]

Softness without the front seam.

[Este Haim]

For our.

[Alana Haim]

Smoothest look and feel ever. Summer won't know what hit it. Stretch your limits in the non stop flexibility of the new Lululemon align no.

[Este Haim]

Line pant in select stores [e-mail].

[Bella]

At Chipotle, we also have a playlist Guacamole as it's being hand mashed. The sizzle of adobo chicken on the grill, the chopping of onions and cilantro. We call our playlist Real Order now. Chipotle for real. Hi, come in. Welcome to Fashion Neurosis Heim. This is the first time I've had more than one guest and I bought extra pillows especially for you. And can I start with you, Estee, because you're the eldest and I'm the eldest too, in my family and I, I wanted to afford you your rank. And can you tell me what you're wearing today and why you chose these particular clothes?

[Danielle Haim]

I'm wearing Uchila Safdie. I love the fabric of this dress. I love the cut and I love the ruffles. I tend to be more. I think I'm the flirtiest dresser in the family, but I don't think I'm the flirtiest person. I think that's Alana. I think Alana is the biggest flirt in the family, but I think I tend to dress the flirtiest. You think that's fair?

[Alana Haim]

Mm, I would agree.

[Danielle Haim]

And yeah, I don't know, I just wanted to. I wanted to dress up for you. Bella.

[Bella]

Thank you so much. It means a lot. Danielle, how about you?

[Danielle Haim]

I am wearing a Jenny Fax skirt with a fun little black underwear detail. It's actually printed on the skirt. I just thought it would be funny to wear. I usually don't wear skirts. I'm more of a, you know, pants or tailored kind of girl. But I'm wearing this Jennifex skirt today. And then this jacket is a Louis Vuitton leather jacket. It's one of my favorites. And it's by Nicolas Casque, who I am a very, very, very, very huge fan of.

[Bella]

Alana, your turn.

[Alana Haim]

I'm wearing a vintage helmet laying dress and a Callaghan jacket that was designed by Nicolas Ghosquier. I think this is from the year 2000. And I scoured the Internet because he only did three seasons at Calligan. So I scoured the Internet for a piece and I wore it because they were the two pieces in my suitcase that I really wanted to wear. And I feel like they needed a time out.

[Bella]

I'd forgotten he did. Callaghan. Yeah, it's really nice. I must say. I love his previous work as well. I love what he did for Balenciaga.

[Danielle Haim]

Huge fan. Huge, huge, huge fans.

[Alana Haim]

Big Nicola fans.

[Bella]

You are Haim, a girl band of three sisters. One of the most popular rock groups out there right now. Who's the tastemaker and how obedient are the other two of you at following orders or how does it work between you?

[Alana Haim]

I'm a follower. I've been a follower. I'm the youngest. I've been a follower my whole life.

[Danielle Haim]

I think we have different, you know, maybe if you would call it like a taste makery situation. I think Esti's always been the tastemaker when it comes to finding and discovering music. And I think Alana and I have always just followed Esti's amazing music taste.

I hope I steered you in the wrong, in the right direction.

[Alana Haim]

You did. You always did. You always did.

[Danielle Haim]

You always have. You still do. Esti's always discovering the best music and.

[Bella]

In terms of clothes, because my sister told me recently that when we were kids, she would look at what I was wearing always, and then sometimes think, hmm, maybe I won't do that. I was like slightly shocked because as the eldest you have this imperious feeling of like certainty when it comes. Well, I did anyway. Yet a huge dependency. And I wondered how you figured out your, your aesthetic identities.

[Danielle Haim]

Oh, wow.

I, Bella, I feel you on a very deep level as the eldest because I didn't have anyone to look up to other than like all I really had was just. I looked at my, my girlfriends for, I guess for fashion advice and then also just magazines and. But there were some disasters, I really. There were some bad fashion choices, I think, growing up. And I wouldn't be surprised if Danielle and Alana looked at me sometimes and were like, no, no, I just.

[Alana Haim]

I spent my whole childhood stealing what was in your guys closets. That was my. I was a borrower.

[Danielle Haim]

No, you got all the hand me downs.

[Alana Haim]

I got all the hand me downs. But I'd also just. You guys would notoriously get new things and I would just steal them.

[Bella]

Because you seem kind of quite harmonious in like how you. You dress. It seems to have a link to it. Whereas me and my sister, for some reason sometimes people think we're each other, but we are so different in our aesthetics. I'm more of a kind of child soldier and she's more of a little princess that was our demeanors. And so we rarely kind of swap clothes. But I expected a certain allegiance, even if it wasn't, like, replicated in what she wore.

[Alana Haim]

I just think Danielle. I think I looked up to both of my siblings, but I think Danielle. I think we can all agree that Danielle had the best closet.

[Danielle Haim]

Well, Esti and I would drive around LA. When Esti got her license when she was 16 and a half, it kind of opened up Los Angeles to us because, you know, our parents, we just kind of stayed in our neighborhood mostly. They didn't really like driving us to different parts of la. They just wanted us to kind of just like, hang in the backyard and kind of be in our neighborhood. But once Esti got her license, the whole city kind of opened up to us, and we would kind of run around to different thrift shops. And the dollar sale was a terrible. We just would go shopping and try to scrounge around and find things that we thought, you know, a lot of vintage shopping. We're really lucky. In la, we get really good vintage.

And especially back then.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

Before people knew what they had.

[Bella]

Yeah. Yeah. We used to have jumble sales before vintage was a.

[Alana Haim]

That's the best.

[Danielle Haim]

That's what the dollar sale is.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Dollar sale was. There were. It was in a parking lot on La Brea in Hollywood, and they would. They would literally, like, take out bundles of clothing, and every piece was a dollar.

[Bella]

Wow.

[Danielle Haim]

And so amazing. Our mom would give us each $10. So then we got. By the end of it, we'd have 30 pieces of clothing, and then they would just go home and, like, hack away at cuddly, Cut it up, try to make it look like what we saw in vogue again. There were some really bad concoctions we made.

[Bella]

It's important to do those bad things on the journey to finding what's your look. I think they really form you.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

[Bella]

And there's a lot said about the middle child having a harder time in the family. And yet you, Danielle, your, I believe, the main writer of songs and.

[Danielle Haim]

No, we all write, but I do take a production role, right? Yeah, we all write our songs, but I take a bit of the production role.

[Alana Haim]

You take a lot of the production role.

[Bella]

She's being modest because you seem quite shy as well. And I wondered if you used your outfits to signal the kind of nuance of your personality that you hold. Maybe hold back slightly. That's just.

[Danielle Haim]

No, I've always just had an affinity for fashion. And since I can remember, I think when we got our first desktop Computer and Internet connection. I think I was maybe 13 or 14 and I started. I figured out what vogue.com was or I think at the time I was big, you know, Nylon magazine fan. And I was just searching for, you know, different things on the Internet. Different, you know, trying to find cool inspiration for, you know, clothing and how to express myself with clothing, I think has always just been very like important to me. And I think also fashion and music, to me, they kind of go hand in hand. And I think a lot of our, our favorite bands growing up, we also took such style cues from.

[Bella]

Was there anyone in particular?

[Danielle Haim]

Well, there was a moment, I think, you know. Well, we were huge kind of MTV fans when we were, you know, in our, you know, I think you must have been like 8.

[Alana Haim]

I was baby, like 7 and or.

[Danielle Haim]

8 and I was 10. Nesty was like 13. And it was right around the time that, you know, Britney Spears and NSYNC and Backstreet Boys, all of these amazing pop bands were coming out. And we loved all of the kind of uniform with the boy bands and you know, the Spice Girls for us, even though we were in the states, were huge. And their self expression with their clothing, I think was always so inspiring to us. But it was really amazing to see these groups kind of express themselves with fashion. And we were obsessed with them.

[Alana Haim]

And then also with like Destiny's Child, I feel like I always loved how they would always dress similarly, but they all had their own take on it.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. And then there was. So that was kind of in our early, early teens. And then there was a moment, I think around 2001 where we saw the Strokes on MTV and we were like, who are they? Why? What are these cool jackets and these cool tight jeans? And I think, you know, that kind of changed our. Kind of changed our lives. But yeah, it was. And I think from then on we kind of started digging through the Internet for music inspiration and maybe more of.

[Alana Haim]

You know, I remember when you taught me to hand sew straight leg jeans into skinny jeans.

[Danielle Haim]

There was a moment when we would see. I think it was in 2000 or 2002 where we discovered paparazzi photos of Kate Moss. And we were just, we just thought she was the coolest looking girl. And we saw her wear, I think they were sass and bide, maybe skinny jeans for the first time, like this low rise gray skinny jeans. And she wore them with ballet flats. And I remember being like, how do I find that? All my jeans were. All of our jeans were like flared or boot cut. So we took a needle and thread, we turned the jeans inside out and just from the knee down, hemmed them, hemmed them.

[Alana Haim]

But we never skinny.

[Danielle Haim]

It never really worked.

It never really worked. And they were really hard to get on. But yeah, we kind of were making our own skinny jeans.

[Bella]

Yeah. She was so good at skin. She's so good at a new outfit. Like just, you know, obviously being a Londoner too. And she would show up somewhere and you'd think, how did she, how did she figure out a white pair of white trousers and a red shirt would be the coolest thing you've ever seen in your life? She just looked like she'd been dropped, you know, drop from outer space. Just dazzling. She just always does it the coolest.

[Danielle Haim]

I mean, I think for a long time my kind of uniform was like skinny jeans that we sewed and then ballet flats. And then I think you guys call it a vest.

Yeah. You loved a vest.

Well, I loved it. A button up vest. But then under would be like, also like a, like a tank top. Oh yeah. And then a button like from a three piece suit. We were thrifted, like a little vest with buttons. And that was like.

We had so many vests.

We had so many vests.

[Bella]

Yeah. God.

[Danielle Haim]

From the dollar sale.

[Alana Haim]

From the dollar sale.

[Bella]

They're the best ones because the new one is always like, doesn't fit.

[Danielle Haim]

No, no.

[Alana Haim]

You need it tailored.

[Bella]

Already worn down and not know where it's come from. Somehow it just kind of makes, makes you, makes your body. And you talked about at school, I mean, at school the currency is clothes. But then there's also snacks. And you said you didn't have good snacks. I was so interested because I was so embarrassed about my lunch. I used to go under the table and eat it really quickly and pop back up and then sponge off everybody else and look at them like a hungry dog. Until I got their kind of stuff. And what were your snacks then?

[Danielle Haim]

Our snacks?

[Alana Haim]

We didn't really have snacks.

[Danielle Haim]

Veggies are like an apple.

[Alana Haim]

An apple. Which is very sensible. Honestly, my mom would.

[Danielle Haim]

She would make us every day a sandwich.

[Alana Haim]

A sandwich.

[Danielle Haim]

So it was mostly a turkey sandwich with mayonnaise and.

[Bella]

Oh, that mustard. Amazing.

[Alana Haim]

Nothing else.

[Bella]

But was it like huge hunks of brown bread or nice soft white bread?

[Alana Haim]

It was just like whatever was at.

[Danielle Haim]

The supermarket, like the sandwich bread.

[Alana Haim]

But I think what growing up, like when you went to a friend's house and they had like a snack drawer or a snack closet.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

It felt like a movie. Yeah. Like you have Just dunkaroos, Gushers and gushers.

[Danielle Haim]

Fruit by the foot.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah. Just readily available.

[Danielle Haim]

We stayed friends with those friends.

[Alana Haim]

Yes. Yeah, those were good friends. When kids had, like, M M's.

[Danielle Haim]

Who were those, Andy?

Yeah. We didn't.

Or like, the friends that had parents that would bring our friends fast food.

[Alana Haim]

Oh, yeah, that's for lunch. For lunch.

[Danielle Haim]

For lunch. Like, that was jealous.

[Alana Haim]

Also Lunchables.

[Danielle Haim]

Do you guys have Lunchables?

[Bella]

Yeah, I've heard of. I've seen them.

[Alana Haim]

You were cool. You had the pizza. Lunchables.

[Bella]

Yeah, I still do that. When I go to someone's house, I open their cupboards and I just stand there and look and see what they've got.

[Danielle Haim]

What are the choices?

[Bella]

They. I never have anything until my son comes home, and then I rush to the supermarket, but I have a very bad fridge. It's got, like, some mayonnaise, and that's it.

[Danielle Haim]

We can relate.

We were like a. An ingredient family. I don't know if you've seen.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Where. It's more of, like. It's. We're more of like. There's, like, a lot of food in the fridge where you all. You have to, like, make a. You have to make the meal.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

It's not just, like, ready, like.

Yeah.

Yeah. So our. My. My mom loved going food shopping. We always had food, but it was always like. You had to actually cut up vegetables.

Yeah.

You had to prepare it.

[Alana Haim]

Well, I'm just a terrible cook, so it was. I just. Wait. I'm a true baby of the family. I just sat and waited till somebody helped. But, yeah, our fridge was. We were never. That's why no one ever wanted play dates.

[Bella]

Yeah. No, it really directs your friendships at a certain age, doesn't it, Thinking about what you can indulge in at that.

[Danielle Haim]

Oh, yes.

[Bella]

And Stevie Nicks is quoted as being a fan of yours, too. And you planning something together.

[Alana Haim]

Maybe.

[Danielle Haim]

I don't know, Bella.

Maybe.

[Alana Haim]

We don't know yet.

[Danielle Haim]

Even you saying that out loud is, like, crazy, crazy thing to hear.

Yeah. She's always been such a huge inspiration to us.

[Bella]

She's a big inspiration to young artists. You know, there are so many people who cite her, and I mean, her music and her look, you know, and fashion wise, she's a big influence, and she just never stops. And it's great that she's kind of, you know, found this kind of connection with you all and has such lovely things to say about how you work as a band and how you complement each other. What the things I read that she'd said, but I know you clearly can't say anything about it, but anyway, it's something to be excited about going forward.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. We absolutely love her so much and.

[Alana Haim]

Have always been just in awe of her. We've seen her so many times in concert, and every time, I'm in awe. It's just incredible.

[Bella]

And I'm always interested in the transition from girlhood to womanhood. And it's also a time of sort of inexplicable secretiveness within family relationships, and I wondered if who was the worst.

[Danielle Haim]

In this area of going from girlhood to womanhood.

[Bella]

Yeah. And also, you know, the sort of sudden withdrawal from what people expect from you, where you just think, I'm not telling you anything.

[Alana Haim]

What would you think? I would say, Essie, you were the oldest. You had no one to guide you through.

[Danielle Haim]

I think I'm still figuring it out, if I'm being honest.

[Bella]

Yes, I totally relate.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. I think. Well, I think my teens were pretty tough, and then college was also pretty tough. And then getting out of college was also pretty tough. What kind of pressure did you feel?

[Bella]

What were you stepping back from?

[Danielle Haim]

I didn't really have a lot of confidence as a kid, even though I loved performing. But I think when I was off stage, like, I. All three of us, like, you know, we grew up doing shows for our parents in our living room, and, like, with the kids in our neighborhood, we would put on shows.

[Bella]

God.

[Danielle Haim]

But then I think once I got off stage, I think I really have a lot of confidence in myself. I never really felt, you know, I don't know, good about myself. I had really, really. Like, there were really nice kids that went to my school, and I had friends, but, like, I never really felt like I fit in. And I think that kind of continued from, like, elementary school, middle school, into high school. And I think the. When I really found my stride, I think I was well into my 20s, and I think I'm maybe just sort of hitting my stride now.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Honestly, I think I. Yeah, I think, you know, gaining confidence is kind of. You have to work at it every day, I think. I think I'm just sort of starting to really feel like myself or like my truest self now. I think.

[Bella]

I suppose maybe it's a bit of a myth, feeling confident when you're young. And, I mean, you are. You've done so much, all of you, but it's. It's a mysterious thing. But what's great is feeling that that's coming when it's been such A kind of tenuous thing. I mean, obviously looking at you all, you just seem so shining and it's all like, so, you know, you give so much through your music and people feel so good listening to your music and, you know, the thoughtfulness of your lyrics and the kind of mood in your music.

[Danielle Haim]

And I just wanted attention from boys and I didn't get any.

[Alana Haim]

I think that also.

[Danielle Haim]

That was tough for me. You could, like, drive a truck through my two front teeth. I mean, now I look back on it and I think it was, like, chic and, like, cute, but at the time did not feel that way.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Now I kind of miss it.

[Alana Haim]

I have my gap still.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah, Alana still has her gap. We all had a gap between our teeth growing up.

[Bella]

That's the coolest thing. I mean, people practically make those gaps.

[Danielle Haim]

I know.

[Bella]

And I read that you're all obsessed with Phoebe Philo.

[Danielle Haim]

Yes.

[Alana Haim]

Oh, my goodness.

[Bella]

We're all obsessed with Phoebe Philo. What is it about her that you. You're captivated by?

[Danielle Haim]

It all started when I saw a picture of Mia wearing the banana print, a banana print dress. And I just. I was obsessed with that pattern. And I remember again, I was still understanding the Internet because I think this was, like, in 2003, and I think I somehow stumbled upon, oh, this is Chloe, the brand Chloe or something. And from then on, like, every couple months, I would remember to check the Internet for. I didn't even know what, like a fashion week was, but I just kind of understood, oh, there's like, some sort of show where there's, like, really cool clothes coming down to this sort of Runway. And I. I started really trying to understand what the fashion world was. And I think, yeah, it was Chloe, like 2003, 2004, that I really started loving. And now I. I've gone a little bit back and I love the Stella and Phoebe collab. And earlier Chloe and then, you know, Phoebe, Chloe. And then also have to shout out again, Nicola. Nicola's Balenciaga was huge. Yeah, huge, huge, huge for us. But of course, it was just, you know, it's not like we could ever even dream of owning anything. These are these brands. But we would just go on the Internet and just look at these beautiful clothes. And I'm just a huge fan of Phoebe. And then later on when she did Celine, it was, like, mind blowing. And now her own brand is beautiful. So, yeah, we're just huge fans.

[Bella]

I love what. There's so much seriousness and then there's so much these fantastic jokes and the Glamour, the way she. She just brings in a color, and it seems like she's invented this color. She just brings this kind of swagger and this charm to dressing, but super chic. But you could be, you know, on the street or going to some fancy event or. And it seems like the quality in her personality that comes through in her work, which I really love.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah, we're huge fans. I think it was. Yeah. Especially around the, like, 2005 era. I'll never forget my first ever, ever, ever, like, big purchase. There was a sale at this place called Fred Siegel. I think I was 18. And we went. We heard that on the last day, they do 95% off.

Bottom of the barrel.

So we woke up early. We figured out somehow when it was the 95 off day, and I got all my money from my birthday, and I found a Chloe top.

We both did.

We both each got one. They were 95 off. So they were $50 each.

Yeah. So yours was the green one.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah. With the black buttons.

[Danielle Haim]

And I had a pink one with buttons, like a ruffle tank top. But they were each $50.

$50. And for us at the time, we're like, I can't believe we're spending this much money on the top. But, you know, it felt like a piece of history. And honestly, it was. It was one of her last collections.

So mom found it.

Yeah, my mom just is cleaning out the house. She just found it. But that was such a big deal for us to own.

[Alana Haim]

You never wore it. You actually, like, you know, I.

[Danielle Haim]

Well, I wouldn't, because I just didn't want to get.

[Alana Haim]

Was like a museum piece for you. Like, you knew that.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. But also, RIP Fred Siegel was such an amazing, great store.

[Alana Haim]

We only went for the sales.

[Danielle Haim]

We only went for the sales. 95% off, but they were really amazing. 95% off.

[Alana Haim]

95% off is insane.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

[Bella]

It's good to buy things that you never wear, though. Some. I know it sounds a bit, like, elitist, but I have got things that I never wear but I don't regret. And there's not many, but they're so beautiful. And I think maybe one day or, you know, I look in the cupboard and think, oh, I love that thing. And sort of waiting, you know, I.

[Danielle Haim]

Don'T know when, but I think Danielle's gonna frame the Chloe top. She's gonna have it on her frame and put it on her wall.

[Bella]

And. Do you all have different attachment styles? I think, Alana, you said being a little sister, you feel like your job is to Be the wrangler of the family. And I wonder, what's your main wrangle?

[Alana Haim]

I think I have always grown up just being happy to be here.

[Bella]

That's so nice.

[Alana Haim]

I just always. My siblings were so extremely powerful growing up. And then I came along and I just wanted to fit in. And I think for me and my siblings, I think when I turned 16 was when I turned from annoying little sister to friend. Once I kind of bridged that gap of being annoying to friend, I just was so afraid I was going to lose it. So I was just always so incredibly excited to be involved like that. My sisters would go to a party and they'd be. They'd say, you want to come? And I couldn't believe it. So I always knew I was like, I got it. I gotta play it cool. I just gotta fit in. I had braces. I knew I was always the youngest person at the party, so even that was cool. And I was just happy to be there. So I think now growing up again, I'm just. I'm grateful you guys accepted me. I'm still scared they're gonna be like, you can't come. And I'm in my 30s.

[Bella]

Was that anxiously attached or fearful or. I don't know.

[Danielle Haim]

I definitely have an anxious attachment style, for sure.

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

I don't know what the.

[Danielle Haim]

Anxious avoidant and anxious. What's the other one?

[Bella]

Yeah, anxious avoidant and anxious insecure attached.

[Danielle Haim]

So I have an insecure attachment style, but I'm working on it.

[Alana Haim]

I think I like avoiding every.

[Danielle Haim]

So you're anxious avoidant.

[Alana Haim]

I think I'm avoidant. I like to run through life just hoping that everything's gonna be okay. I worry about the problems later.

[Bella]

I think things change with different people. You can be different things in different relationships. Because I kind of find it quite fascinating when I discovered the whole thing. Thing. Now, attachment theory is such a kind of interesting part of understanding inexplicable kind of behaviors within oneself. And I've, like us there. I've always been quite anxiously attached, but now I'm morphing into more anxious avoidant, which I much prefer.

[Danielle Haim]

What is the plan? I think I do. I agree with you. I think that it's something you kind of have to work at. I'm currently working through it, Having somehow.

[Bella]

The courage to go against the anxiety, which is so terrifying. And then it depends on the person that is most sort of affecting in that. Yes, there's someone in particular and either kind of face them out or dump them.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Well, the dream is to just find someone with a secure attachment style and to be around people that are secure and then hopefully become one of those people as well. Which again, currently working.

[Bella]

But I was reading this. I don't know if you've ever followed Esther.

[Danielle Haim]

Esther Perel?

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Oh yeah.

[Bella]

And I read her book, Mating in Captivity. I read it and she talked about the kind of myth of security and how somehow searching for security was almost.

[Danielle Haim]

The death of a relationship.

[Bella]

Well, that too, but also kind of insecure making. Because there's this security, but then there's this other stuff that is missing, which is the kind of charge of insecurity. So how the hell do you reconcile that? Maybe I'm chasing after some fantasy after, you know, watching my parents weird relationship.

[Danielle Haim]

I love that. I mean, I loved that book, but it was also the catalyst for one of my breakups.

[Bella]

Right.

[Danielle Haim]

We read it together and I think we were both like, oh, okay, I think this is done.

[Bella]

God, that's fascinating. This episode is brought to you by mubi, a curated streaming service dedicated to elevating great cinema from around the globe. From iconic directors to emerging auteurs. Every film on MUBI is hand selected so you can discover incredible movies and series streaming anytime, anywhere. Now streaming on MUBI is Twin peaks. The cult TV masterpiece is now on MUBI in celebration of its 35th anniversary. I've been rewatching the series and it's as mesmerizing and adrenaline inducing as ever. The beauty of the filming, the David lynch lighting, so moody and evocative. The music by Angelo Badalamenti is haunting. And then there's the cherry pie. The whole thing is a feast. You can watch for yourself. Try MUBI, free for 30 [e-mail] that's M U B I.com fashionneurosis for a whole month of great cinema and TV. Totally free. Erneste, as the eldest, like me, you had some time without sisters and.

[Danielle Haim]

Yes.

[Bella]

Do you always feel the most powerful just out of habit or is there. Is there one that you kind of a view that you kind of. There's a consensus who is the leader?

[Danielle Haim]

No, I think that all three of us kind of take the lead depending on the situation. And I think that's why this works. I think that we've figured out our footing and we know when we see one sister struggling, we know that one or both of us have to kind of step in and help. I don't know. I think that, you know, we've spent our entire lives together. I know that there were three years when I didn't have siblings. I don't really remember. I mean, must have been fun.

[Alana Haim]

I know.

[Danielle Haim]

I mean, I see pictures of just me with mom and dad, and I'm like, what an amazing trio.

I want that bad.

I cut off all the Elle of Danielle's hair when she was like three or four. I woke up in the middle of the night and with safety scissors, just cut off all her hair. There's a lot of photos of Dingell with, like, crooked bangs. And my mom tried to fix it as much as she possibly could, but she didn't do the best job. But, I mean, that was when we were like, young, young, young kids.

[Alana Haim]

But I can't even imagine what happened when I came along. You guys both had to deal.

[Bella]

Were you like the pet?

[Alana Haim]

I think so, yeah. I don't know. I don't really remember.

[Danielle Haim]

No, I don't really remember that either. But I think that we've. I think we've just, you know, we've grown up together. We had parents who were just like, go in the backyard. Play with your siblings. So, you know, go kick the ball. Go kick the ball.

[Alana Haim]

And then Essie would say, let's do. We're choreographed. Let's do a dance. Let's do a dance. Esther is an incredible choreographer. We would. And me and Danielle were extremely obedient. We would just do everything that she said. And Nessie almost had a vision. Always had a vision.

[Danielle Haim]

And then we. Making the costumes.

[Alana Haim]

Costume changes. There were costume changes. Costumes, music changes, everything.

[Danielle Haim]

We're never bored.

[Bella]

Yeah. You know, and did you have, like a name when you were really tiny? Because I know as a family, you performed together and what was it? Rockin.

[Alana Haim]

Rockin Ho.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. Yeah. My mom and dad.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. I mean, we basically just played like, for charity and.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Only covers, street fairs, and I'm a type 1 diabetic. We did some stuff for that.

[Alana Haim]

It was our weird family activity.

[Danielle Haim]

There was definitely a point where I thought everyone had a family band. And then when I found out that wasn't true, I was really upset.

[Bella]

And was there a moment where you decided, we're going to be a band, or were you just born a band almost?

[Danielle Haim]

No, I think it was, you know, when we played with our parents, we only played covers. They were not songwriters. They just loved playing music. My mom's a guitar player and our dad's a drummer, and I think we just loved. They just loved the act of playing songs that they loved. And it wasn't until we were kind of like, well, what about songwriting? Which was, you know, probably when we were in our. In our teens. So I was. Probably Started writing songs around the time I was what, 15, maybe younger.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

That we would just kind of go into our bedroom and start writing little songs. And our parents had no idea what we were doing.

Yeah, they were like cute guys.

Yeah, cute, cute. But it wasn't until then that we were like, well, maybe we should try and play these songs live in front of people. That we decided, okay, well, maybe let's try it. I was actually. I was graduating from high school and decided I didn't really want to go to college. I wanted to try and perform these songs with my sisters. And that's when we really started to take it seriously and tried to book gigs in LA anywhere we could.

Emphasis on tried.

[Alana Haim]

Tried many times. Many times.

[Danielle Haim]

But yeah, we played just in LA to like two or three people. So many shows, like for five, six years until we ended up getting signed.

[Alana Haim]

But yeah, it was a great time.

[Bella]

So wonderful. It's so lovely to know kind of what you're doing when you're that young. Because it seems, I mean, some what's.

[Danielle Haim]

What we wanted to do.

I look back now and I'm like. I don't know what we were thinking.

We had blind faith.

[Alana Haim]

We were so, like. It was very much blind faith.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

[Bella]

I suppose part of being a family too is that you're not going to suddenly quit or maybe less likely. And that one can encourage the. You know, you can keep the morale strong by you know, just. I mean, the people become successful because of perseverance as well.

[Danielle Haim]

Agreed. I think a lot of people get discouraged and then they just stop. But I think we were just having so much fun.

[Alana Haim]

It was the best time. It was so fun and it felt. I mean, every show, even if there was three people there, we were just grateful for the three people. Most times it was like a boyfriend that one of us had and like our parents. But even that, it was just the honor of getting to play on a stage was more than enough for us.

[Danielle Haim]

And I think if like any little like incremental thing that happened felt like the biggest win and the biggest victory, like, you know, I think still does. It still does. But I think especially then, it was like anything. It was like you guys were gonna play the Troubadour. Huge, huge. Like this really iconic venue in la. And it was. It wasn't easy to get a gig there.

And we like, knew the band that was headlining. Yeah, can we please play open at.

Like 6pm at doors?

[Bella]

Because that's a legend that. I mean, I was reading about that in Eve Babbitts and Didian Babbitts book, and there's a lot of talk about the troubadour scene. And is that still a thing?

[Danielle Haim]

I mean, I think so.

[Alana Haim]

It's still. I mean, I would say venue. I love that venue. Out of every venue that I've ever played in la, I think the Troubadour is still my favorite because it is.

[Danielle Haim]

So legendary so much.

[Alana Haim]

When you walk in, you really feel the history of that venue.

[Bella]

And a question for all of you. If you. If you're feeling down, do you wear more or less clothing?

[Alana Haim]

Probably more.

[Danielle Haim]

More?

Yeah. For me, it's more. I love layering. I just want to be.

Yeah. Cozy.

[Bella]

Yeah. Because I have a friend who wears next to nothing when she's done. And I'm kind of jealous. Astonished. But it's some way of regulating her emotional kind of thing.

[Danielle Haim]

And maybe I should try that.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

I wear a comforter. I literally wear a duvet. A duvet. When I'm feeling down.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

Like, I don't know, try to cover myself in as much soft material as I possibly can. But that's actually a really interesting way of approaching it. I mean, right now I'm kind of doing that I'm the least covered of all of us.

[Bella]

Well, that's a good sign. Yeah, I know. It's.

[Danielle Haim]

It.

[Bella]

It's so odd when people do things that you can't. They're like the antithesis of what you think is the solution. And then you think, oh, maybe. Maybe I should try something to jog myself. Do you know? Something to do with what I wear. I mean, I always think it's. The great thing about good clothes are that they can be your kind of ally when you're going through something. And if you have a good outfit, you can be less distracted by your kind of inner turbulence.

[Danielle Haim]

When we were on tour last time and we had these custom Louis Vuitton outfits, we called it our armor.

[Bella]

Yeah. Yeah, I know. It's a sort of heart protector, isn't it? And if you. If you fancy someone and don't like something they're wearing, does it kill your attraction?

[Danielle Haim]

It's tough.

[Alana Haim]

Clothes can always be changed, which is nice.

[Danielle Haim]

That's the good news.

[Bella]

What's that?

[Alana Haim]

Clothes can always be changed. Yeah, but it is. I feel like you can tell a lot about somebody by what they wear on a first date.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

I think you can kind of tell what. What the future holds for you.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

But yeah, no, it could. I mean, yes, honestly, actually something that is, that is so terrible is when you fall in love with somebody and they cut their hair. It's something different and you have to, you have to fall in love with this new person. Speaking from experience a lot.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah, speaking from experience, you know, what was the wor.

[Bella]

What kind of. Can you describe what happened if they.

[Alana Haim]

I was dating a guy, he had the most gorgeous hair and then he cut it all off and it felt like I was dating a stranger and not in a good way.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

Also his attitude changed too.

[Danielle Haim]

Oh well, that's the big, that's the real problem.

[Bella]

I always tend to go for guys with no hair falling out. So I love whatever they've got.

[Alana Haim]

Love her.

[Bella]

How about you, Danielle? Have you got like an alert, an allergy to anything? Have you been horrified by anything in particular? And what have you done about it?

[Danielle Haim]

There was. Oh God, I don't know.

[Bella]

There's always something.

[Danielle Haim]

There was.

You don't need any names.

No, I know. I went, I went on a date with a guy that had like a pre distress dressed like motorcycle jacket.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

But it was brand new. Do you know what I mean?

[Bella]

I know exactly what you mean.

[Danielle Haim]

When it's, it's just, just like get an old one maybe. But it, if you want it to be distressed. I don't know, maybe that's really, that's.

Just a recent top of mind.

Top of mind. Ick.

[Bella]

Este.

[Danielle Haim]

Oh me. I guess my ick is someone who dresses like too seriously. Does that make sense? Like I like, I mean, I tend to gravitate towards people that have a bit of a sense of humor with everything. And if you're dressing too and by serious, I don't know, I guess like too buttoned up or something, you know, or like uptight.

[Bella]

Yeah. Or like preppy.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah. Or something like. And I like, you know, I like, you know, men that dress a little casual but that know how to dress up and dress well when they need to be buttoned up, I guess. I don't know. My fiance's a great dresser. There've been some blunders, but I've called him on them. No, he, he's got great taste. I'm really lucky. He's very lucky. Yes, he's very lucky, but I'm lucky too.

[Bella]

I find it interesting when someone I like wears something appalling. And what do I like going, getting over it, thinking, yeah, this is really, I'm really struggling here and I quite like this person. So where do I place this Kind of aversion, this thing that is literally pushing me to the other side of the earth.

[Danielle Haim]

Well, how bad are we talking about?

[Bella]

I know what was my worst was this guy and this I. Anyway, he wasn't the guy for me.

[Danielle Haim]

And isn't my guy, clearly.

[Bella]

I opened the door and he was wearing a straw boater on the back of his head and coral colored jeans rolled up halfway up the thigh, the calf with. With espadrilles and a dry PT shirt like he was in the chorus of a pantomime. And it was. It was a real shocker. It was so bad.

[Danielle Haim]

I'll show you a photo of my ex when we're done with this. And I can relate. We have so much in common.

[Alana Haim]

Oh, God.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

[Bella]

But I. I knew it was a sign and I just thought, you know what? I'm going to ignore it. It's so bad, I'm just going to pretend it's not happening. And anyway, it took its natural.

[Alana Haim]

We all have to go through it.

[Bella]

Yeah. And you work with a film director, Paul Thomas Anderson. He's done 10 of your music videos. And I wondered, like, how does he capture how you want to project yourselves? And why do you trust his vision?

[Alana Haim]

Well, it's. It's honestly unexplainable. I don't know how he does it, but I feel like he's also one.

[Danielle Haim]

Of the greatest living directors, the greatest.

[Alana Haim]

Director of all time. But I'll never forget, our first project we ever did was this short film that we made called Valentine. And before we worked with him, we would always, you know, we would do music videos and I would look and it just never felt like me. I would always look at it and go, I mean, this is fine. But it feels like I'm like watching a different person. And when we did Valentine together, I'll never forget we were watching all the takes and it was like this eureka moment where I was watching the film and it was the first time I ever said, like, that's me. He captured the essence of all of us so effortlessly and it makes me emotional because I love Paul. I think he's taught us so much. He's just not only the most incredible director, but also one of our. One of the most amazing friends. And I had never met somebody ever that I admired so much from afar. And then when we met, we had so much in common and we loved the same things and had the same references. I mean, he has many way better references than we do, but we're from. We're both from the Valley.

[Bella]

Yeah.

[Alana Haim]

And we both had a very deep love for our hometown. And he's just been the most. I mean, even saying that he's done 10 music videos is insane. Thank you, Paul.

[Danielle Haim]

Thank you.

[Alana Haim]

Thank you, Paul, because you are. He was also making incredible movies in between doing our funny music videos that we did together where we. We would call him basically the day before and he, like, the best sport ever would help us out. But no, he's incredible. And he got to shoot the COVID of our album, which was. It's insane. He's shot two of them now. Crazy.

[Bella]

So great. It looks brilliant. And how did you. How did. Because you were also in his film Licorice Pizza, which I just love, loved. I saw it. I think it was still locked down and was just such joy. It was so funny and anarchic and uplifting. And how did you meet?

[Alana Haim]

It's a very long story.

[Danielle Haim]

Well, first of all, Esti got me the boogie night soundtrack for my 16th birthday from a used record store. And we were obsessed with it, so. So we were really big fans of his.

[Alana Haim]

But we actually listened to the soundtrack before we saw the movie.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah.

Yeah.

It was rated R, so we weren't allowed to watch the movie. But the soundtrack was incredible. It was all songs from the 70s and the 80s. So we'd been a fan of his for a really long time. And then. I mean, do you guys want to do.

[Alana Haim]

We can do the abridged.

[Danielle Haim]

Why do you want to do the abridged Trojan.

[Alana Haim]

We can fast. I mean, we've always been fans of him. His. But he. My first job because SD Got me the job was I used to sing. Well, me and s. All three of us actually used to sing jingles for the radio. So we did. There was this company that, you know, needed girl singers to sing jingles for other companies and they gave us. It was. I was in high school and they gave us $50, $50 a session, which to me was a million dollars. It still is a million dollars, but $50 for a 16 year old, that was insane. And the guy that gave us the job was this guy named Asa. And on our first album because we loved him so much and he basically fueled me being able to buy weed on the weekend. We thanked him on the album because we were just so grateful that he gave us a job.

[Bella]

That's so sweet.

[Alana Haim]

And Paul knew Asa's brother named Jorma, and he had heard our song on the radio and he bought our album, looked at the liner notes, saw that we thanked Asa, called his brother Jorma and was like, your brother knows this band of girls that are from the Valley, and they love the Valley so much.

[Danielle Haim]

Give them my email.

[Alana Haim]

Give them my email. Yeah.

[Danielle Haim]

So then we get a text from Asa, and he's like, hey, Paul, Thomas Anderson wants me to give you guys his email.

[Alana Haim]

And we thought it was a joke.

[Danielle Haim]

Yeah, I thought it was a joke.

[Alana Haim]

Could not believe it. And we emailed Paul, and he invited us to have dinner with his family, with Maya Rudolph, who. We're also insane.

[Danielle Haim]

Insanely.

[Alana Haim]

We grew up watching Maya on SNL every weekend. And we were so nervous.

[Danielle Haim]

She's so good.

[Alana Haim]

And we met both of them, and it was basically love at first sight. And we basically morphed families. And it took us a while because we were right at the very end of our first album. Days are gone, like, the touring schedule, so we couldn't work with him, so we just became really close friends. And then on our second album, we had. He basically saw us play live and was like, why don't you have a live video? You guys should play live and I'll film it. We were like, what? And that's where Valentine.

[Danielle Haim]

The first thing we did with him was a live video.

[Alana Haim]

The first thing we did was Valentine. It was. It's an honor. It's also, I think, my favorite thing that we've ever done. We've done so many, but I think the first one was just. I learned so much that day. I wish I. I wish I could paint because I have such a vivid memory of that day. I could paint it if I could. I had the.

[Bella]

Such a good idea.

[Alana Haim]

Talent.

[Bella]

Well, you should do it anyway. God, it's such a great story. It's lovely to have someone who is such a big deal. I would imagine doing those videos where you want people to recognize you and just get it in one second. And, I mean, who's the master of that is. You know, he just. He's such a genius, and he's so ingenious as well. And, Danielle, you talked about when you feel low, you worry about dragging your sisters down. And if you show your sadness. And I wondered how. How you take care of each other in your siblinghood without rescuing each other.

[Danielle Haim]

I do think we rescue each other, but. Yeah, I think sometimes I think we didn't know we were doing it, but I would recognize it afterwards where I would kind of be anxious about something, and I felt like, okay, well, I have to share it with my. I have to tell someone, you know? And looking back, I probably maybe at the time should have told My friends, I'm nervous about this thing, but, you know, I think we're just so close that I would be like, I gotta tell my sisters that I'm so nervous about this thing that we're doing tomorrow, and what could go wrong? And I think, you know, I would do that, and then I would find myself trying to convince them how bad it was. They'd be like, it's gonna be fine. No, it's gonna be really bad if this happens. And then if this happens, then I think, you know, I could kind of convince my sisters that the world was ending, and then we'd be in a collective spiral. And I think I've now realized that's not healthy.

[Alana Haim]

Therapy. Therapy kind of like this.

[Danielle Haim]

And so I think now I've found other ways to express my anxiety.

[Alana Haim]

In private.

[Bella]

It's difficult, isn't it? Because you want someone to understand you. And yet sometimes the habit I found in my family, I would try to get some sort of emotional support by saying everything terrible that I thought about myself. And then I didn't really feel satisfied by the response, which was sometimes indifference or panic. And then I think, why am I doing this? And blame them. Even though I knew it was my habit, that I was imposing, and it's taken a long time to. To kind of break out of it and not go to a kind of half glass full, a sort of melancholy place, which is where I always feel cozy, but actually it's kind of depleting. So it seems like you have this amazing opportunity through your music to just cheer each other up. Because music is such an uplifting thing. It's such a massive antidepressant.

[Alana Haim]

I think we needed especially. I think on this album, I think we found it healthiest because we were all single making this album. Danielle moved in with me, and I think Danielle had basically, since she was at a very. I'm speaking for you now.

[Danielle Haim]

Okay.

[Alana Haim]

Since, you know, I was, like, 19, she was always in a relationship, which.

[Danielle Haim]

I did not see. My. Throughout high school, I wanted was a boyfriend. I never got one.

[Alana Haim]

And then you left. All you had to do is leave.

[Danielle Haim]

And then I turned 19. I kind of turned into a serial monogamist.

[Alana Haim]

Yeah. And I have never been a serial monogamist. I've always been a wild stallion. I feel like that's a very, like, baby of the family traits as being like a lone ranger. But Danielle moved in with me, and we were both single. Esti was single too, but esti, I think three hymes in one house would have been Too many hives. But we would all hang out every day, and we would go out with each other like it was us in high school again, driving around. Esti would drive us around again. We'd try to find a party, try and find a bar. And I think when it came to stripping back all the drama that comes with being in a relationship and just being a sister group, I think we weirdly grew up quicker than we did when we were all in relationships. It was like a very freeing experience to me. And I think making this album, we really needed to heal ourselves and heal our past selves. I think. I think on other albums, we were healing things that were happening recently, and I think we kind of dove deep into our emotions and went back to high school and healed that inner teenager. But it was really lovely to see, like, all of us back together and experiencing life where we are now, but still feel so young.

[Bella]

Yeah, you are. Your song relationships, and you said, lyrically, it's a mirror to our soul, which I thought was really lovely. And. And this a line I read, crushing my heart to fit into your soul. Was that right? Which was really, really good. I think anyone could resonate with that at some point. You know, this kind of shape shifting of, you know, where do you. Where do you accommodate something, and where do you break out? And listening to your album, which I've had the privilege of hearing a few days before it comes out, I've found so many that, you know, so much introspection, but this rhythm of, like, optimism and dance and fun with this thoughtfulness underneath it, and you just all seem to embody that in such a beautiful way, and it's wonderful to witness.

[Danielle Haim]

Thank you.

[Alana Haim]

I think you can get lost very easily. I feel like it's kind of maybe growing up in different relationships, you find yourself changing your clothes and changing how you speak and change. You, like, start morphing into the other person. And then I feel like it takes going through different relationships. I think when. When it's over, you're like, what was I thinking? Why was I. Why was I wearing flannels all the time? What was going on? And I think now it's. It's really nice to be able to be okay on your own and hoping to find somebody that fits you perfectly in the sense that they let you run free. Yeah, that's what we all three needed.

[Bella]

Well, that's great. And thank you so much for being on Fashion Neurosis on this special bed.

[Alana Haim]

On the special bed that I want to have.

[Danielle Haim]

It's so comfortable.

[Alana Haim]

It's so comfortable.

[Danielle Haim]

We're honored to be your first group.

[Alana Haim]

I know.

[Danielle Haim]

First group group therapy. It's an honor.

[Bella]

Wow. It's my honor too. Thank you so much.

[Danielle Haim]

Thank you.

[Este Haim]

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